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copperbadge · 6 months

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RE watching thoughts: I’m not 100% sure, but it might be that the whole “I am not my thoughts” is about engaging and identifying with your metacognition MORE than your initial thoughts. Because I get where you’re coming from - what is a consciousness but a collection of thoughts and feelings? But you can also have thoughts about your own thoughts that are more useful for dealing with whatever situation you’re in, I guess. (Random aside - every time I start thinking about thinking about thinking my brain inevitably starts thinking about Tiffany Aching and The Wee Free Men.)

I really should have replied to this ask sooner because it's going to seem like a non-sequitur now (this was sent much earlier in March) but I'm kind of glad I didn't, because I've been chatting with people about this and I think I understand more why there's an emphasis in some therapies on the idea that we are not our thoughts.

(I uh, haven't read the Tiffany books so I'm not much help there.)

I am coming to understand that many, perhaps most, people judge themselves, comprehensively and harshly, based on their thoughts. Perhaps it's just a lot of people who struggle with mental health, but given the commonality of the sentiment I don't know if I'd confine it that tightly; generally it appears that people cannot conceive of themselves as anything other than a binary of good or bad. So many people I've talked to about this portion of DBT, the watching-questioning-identifying thoughts portion, say that it helps to snap them out of a spiral of "I'm a horrible person, I deserve to suffer/die, I can never be redeemed" after they've failed at something, or had a negative thought, or reacted poorly to an unexpected event.

That is not something I've ever experienced. I mean, jokingly maybe, but not in a real, internal sense.

And that's not to brag -- I'm not saying I think I'm a good person, either, because I don't think I'm a good person. I don't conceive of myself in terms of good or bad. I never cuddle my cats and think "I'm such a good cat dad" or forget to feed them and think "I should die now." I have a perpetual morally neutral attitude towards my own existence; my thoughts and actions might trend me one direction or another but I'm aware of the temporary nature of that. If I fuck up I'll worry about who I might have hurt or whether I'll be fired or what's going to happen as a consequence, if I am polite to someone who didn't deserve it I know I was acting kindly in the moment, but I don't make an inherent moral judgement of myself based on that. And it seems like the vast majority of people do. Which you would think would make me feel pretty good about myself, but honestly...I don't know.

A lot of people I know who have ADHD or are Autistic have talked about seeing themselves as other, as alien -- like that one webcomic artist who draws themself with little antennae to indicate they're strange and different. I've always understood why one might do that, but I never felt that way myself, before or after the diagnosis. After all, let's remember, I was The Normal* Child of my siblings, and if I was The Normal One before the diagnosis, why wouldn't I remain Mostly Normal after?

* As ever, I'm using "normal" as a cultural term, to indicate what we think of as mainstream, not because normal is a thing that really exists.

My life has been relatively solitary -- I have friends and family and I love them but I'm rarely part of a large group, I don't spend a lot of time out in public interacting with people, I'm not a big socializer. Before the Adderall, I really couldn't be, I took too much psychic damage from interpersonal interaction, so I chose those very carefully. And now my DBT class has been a rare moment when I'm encountering contradictions to a lot of my assumptions about the way human beings in our society interact, react, and behave. I just...don't fit that mold very well. I think of it as having crossed wiring, not in the sense that I'm faulty but just in the sense that I'm very, very different. Not Normal. It's not exactly a bad feeling but it's certainly not a great one, internalizing the sensation of alienness.

DBT is proving to be a mixed bag but not in the way I or my therapist intended -- it seems to be either things I was already instinctively doing or things that simply do not apply to me. In one way it's disappointing because it means there isn't much help to be had (we're a little over halfway through the course and I keep thinking "Maybe next class will be useful") but on the other hand it's validating that so much of what I came up with myself as unconscious coping mechanisms is literally what I would have been told to do anyway.

Sometimes it's a combination of both, though, which really blows. I guess most people, if they reframe another person's actions, actually find emotional relief in that, and I don't. An example from the class is that if someone is rude to you, you can consider how they might be having a hard day, and be polite in return; that's great, in terms of defusing a situation, and it's something I do a fair amount of. But apparently it's also something that for most people results in feeling less awful about the interaction, and that's not the case for me. Which is why so much of DBT feels to me like lying to oneself. It's not lying for most people.

So, yeah. I'm going to finish out the course and keep trying things with the therapist but I suspect given everything, I might already be at "as good as it gets" in terms of emotional work. Which isn't the worst thing in the world, and there is still the option to try medication that could help, but I think there will come a point where I'm going to have to deal with the fallout of just how different I am, and how that has impacted my life. Might end up a good thing; something I've really been trying to resolve is unhappiness over being unpartnered and highly likely to remain that way, and at least if this provides a better understanding of why, then perhaps I can process that and put it to rest in a way I've been trying to do but not succeeding well at.

So, we'll see. But I find it both fascinating and kind of horrifying how many people can believe they are irredeemably bad, even if the belief is only temporary, simply because they had an uncharitable thought or impulse. It makes me somewhat grateful for the crossed wires, at least.

#sam has adhd #therapy #dbt

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ast4rg1rl · 2 years

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incorrect quotes (2) ✫

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y/n: *dies* Lo'ak: Timer starts now! When are they coming back? I say two months! Tsireya: Bullshit. One month. Roxto: Nah, half a month. Neteyam, sobbing: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Y/N JUST DIED! Ao'nung, scratching chin in thought: One week.

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Roxto: If you got arrested what would be the charges? Neteyam: Theft. Tsireya: Disturbing the peace. Ao'nung: Aggravated assault. Lo'ak: Arson. y/n: All of the above. In that order, probably.

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*The Squad is on the bus, and a child is crying* kiri: *rolls eyes to the sky* Lo'ak: *makes funny faces to get them to stop* Roxto: *puts their earphones on at 100 volume* Neteyam: *doesn't mind, doesn't bother* Ao’nung: *is the reason they're crying* y/n: *enjoys in silence*

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*The squad's reaction to being told they're the chosen one* Neteyam: I will not let you down. y/n: Sounds fun. kiri: K. Lo'ak: No, I'm fucking not. Roxto: Do I have to be? Ao'nung: Please god, I am so tired.

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Neteyam: You know guys, sometimes I feel like Lo'ak doesn't take me seriously enough. Ao'nung: "Sometimes"? Y/n: "Enough"? Neteyam: Tsireya: Change that to 'at all' and we'll talk.

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Neteyam: I CAN'T DO IT! Tsireya, laughing: I CAN'T EITHER! Neteyam: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE Roxto: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US. Neteyam: Neteyam: I appreciate it, Neteyam: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH- Ao'nung: Neteyam- Neteyam: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE! y/n: Neteyam we gotta- Neteyam: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT. Neteyam: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?' Neteyam, motioning to Lo'ak: NOT FUCKING THIS!

#avatar x reader #rotxo x reader #kiri x reader #neteyam x reader #aonung x reader #tsireya x reader #loak x reader #s.tsireya #s.neteyam #s.ao'nung #s.lo'ak #s.rotxo #s.kiri #incorrect quotes

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archive245 · 11 days

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Random rinaverse hc

- Remi cried when he overheard the girls talking about star signs because he thought anni had cancer

- Niko wanted to be a power ranger growing up, gareth wanted to be spiderman, killian wanted to be superman, jeremy wanted to be batman

- Ronan the typa guy to be like “i got it, i got it, i don’t got it” while trying to catch a ball

- Moreover good thing this man plays soccer be hes horrible at catching things

- Kimberly has an upside down smile and Xander has an eye smile (like the ones where your whole closes yk??)

- Glyns favourite barbie movie was princess charm school and annikas was barbie and the 13 dancing princesses

- Gareth cannot do anything without airpods

- Glyndon doodles all over her homework and occasionally draws on kills arm with a pen while he focusing on something

- Kimberly says “well my dad said” atleast once a day

- Kirill and adrian like going to museums and art galleries, damien gets dragged along because if he doesn’t he gets all petty that they didn’t invite him even tho he complains the entire time their there

- Maya has a severe friendship jealousy issues when it comes to her friends having other friends (mood girl same)

- Reina loved going out to celebrate no matter how small the matter was killian got 100 on his spelling test? celebration, Asher won a court case? celebration, gareth got first place in track and field? celebration

- Ava always had her nails done with long acrylics and likes to just click them around to tell people she just got them done

- Once Xander and Ronan got arrested and they used their one free call on Cole and said your mom and hung up

- Nikolai sucks at spelling and texting example

- Killian drinks a whole pack of cola in a week

- I honestly think Jeremy was scared of girls as a child and when he first met Maya and Mia he was so scared of them he constantly hid from them but to them they just thought Jeremy was ignoring them bc hes a bitch

- Ronan is actually really smart but doesnt like showing it, so instead he acted like the dumb cluless one and people believe it

- Teal actually is a marvel nerd and forces ronan to binge watch the entire series with her

- Cecily started to wear glasses in grade 6, because 1 she thought they made her look like a nerd and 2 because she thought everyone viewed the world as blurry

- When ever Elsa would go on vacation she would buy small trinkets thats reminded her of them for everyone

- When ever anni sees a cat she ll take a picture of it and send it to creigh

- Nikolai consistently looses things, even things that were in his hand, looks away from one second BOOM missing

- Eli got tattoos to try and piss off Aiden little did he know Aiden also has tattoos so he was chill about it

- Creighton was scared if loud noises for a long time, and once Eli scared Creighton by like sneaking up behind him and he had a panic attack and since then Eli payed extra attention to his well being

- Xander is aggressive drunk loves fighting or arguing people, Coles definitely horny drunk disappears minutes after getting drunk, aiden doesnt get drunk, and ronans giggly drunk

- bonus knox is the type you would put on a lease drunk because he runs around and falls alot, definitely wakes up with bruises everywhere

- Teal turns soft and adorable when drunk so she doesnt drink infront of people, Kims also giggley drunk (ronan and kim can be seen just laughing and giggling with eachother on a sofa), elsa is sleepy drunk and silver is definitely the all in or none (she gets blackout drunk or sober no in between)

- Ava always plays a princess peach during mario kart and mia always plays as shyguy

- Gareth was the type ti start assignment weeks in advance, while nikolai started them the night before

-Lan was definitely a kid who needed to be on a leash because he would run around everywhere and get lost, “astrid or levi king please come to the front desk we have your son” was heard every time on the loud speakers every time they went out for a family gathering

#booklr #rina kent #rinaverse #legacy of gods #royal elite series #monster trilogy #throne duet

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dresshistorynerd · 1 year

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I had the idea of writing about some historical queer figures I find interesting and drawing them for this pride month as a little project of mine. I will see how many I'll have time to do, I have in mind at least four other historical people, but knowing myself, I'm not holding my breath for all of them. Julie d'Aubigny she been one of my favorite historical figures for years so I decided to start with her.

Historical Queer Figures - Julie d'Aubigny

Julie d'Aubigny, also known as Mademoiselle Maupin and La Maupin, was a French opera singer and fencer in the late 1600s. She was infamous for having sapphic relationships, being aggressive and dramatic, having androgynous presentation by occasionally dressing in men's clothing in public and being a fencer and duelist. Trans and genderqueer readings of her are very possible, but because none of the accounts of her (at least those I've read) suggests she ever used any other than feminine first names or terms or she/her pronouns about herself, I will use she/her pronouns when talking about her.

The French court absolutely loved to gossip and people were constantly making up libel about the people they didn't like, and Julie had a lot of enemies and was very controversial figure. During the 18th and 19th centuries she was written about a lot in these highly sensationalized Encyclopedias, where the rumors from her lifetime got increasingly wilder and sensational. She was accused for example of seducing noble women in court balls, burning down a convent and murder. There's not much primary sources left or available from her actual lifetime so distinguishing truth from fiction is not an easy task in her case. Kaz Rowe did great job in their youtube video about her to try to actually find out where the stories of her life comes from. They go through some great context too about the rumor industry in the French court at the time so I highly recommend checking it out.

CW: very brief mentions of child sexual abuse and self-harming

The Timeline of Most Concrete Events

Let's first go through the things that have at least a bit more backing than a rumor started 100 years after her death. Julie d'Aubigny was born between 1670 and 1673. Her father was Gaston d'Aubigny, the secretary of Louis of Lorraine, count d’Armagnac, who was Master of Horses to King Loius XIV, and her mother is unknown. She was probably brought to the Versailles court in 1682, where she got a full education including academic subjects, riding and fencing, usually only thought for boys. She was married off to a Sieur de Maupin (first name unknown) probably around 1687, when she would have been 14 to 17 years old. He apparently got a position from a southern province as a tax collector. The stories about her claim she remained in Paris, but I don't think there's evidence of this, though what we do know of her adult life does suggest she was estranged from her husband and lived apart from him. Nevertheless, she did end up in Marseilles, where she first appeared on stage in Marseilles Opéra between 1687 and 1690. She didn't have education in music, but her good looks and beautiful voice landed her the role.

Her first appearances in the Paris Opéra are listed to 1690, so that is probably when she had her debut there. She became a very talked about figure and she gained both friends and enemies in the opera and the court. She performed in the Paris Opéra for probably four years, after which she went to Brussels, Bavaria, where she performed with the Opéra du Quai au Foin at least during 1697 and early 1698, after which she returned to France to perform again with the Paris Opéra.

It was the period when her career peaked and she got a lot of leading female roles. Those roles in French opera were at the time soprano roles, but Julie's natural voice range was lower, contralto. (There's a whole thing where at the time she was described as mezzo-soprano, but the music historian consensus is that her range matches contralto in modern terms as opera was sang on lower cords across the board at the time. (I understand nothing about music theory so I just hope I managed to explain this correctly)) She excelled in secondary female roles of goddesses and warrior women. For the leading roles she had to sing on higher notes than was natural to her and the naive and dainty personalities of those roles clashed with her own personality. Some later retellings of her life claim she performed male roles for female singers (which was common practice, and these roles were often those of young boys), but all known records of her roles are female roles. In 1702 on the leading composers of the Paris Opéra, André Campra, wrote her a leading lady role in Tamcréde, which is often credited to have the first leading female role for contralto. But her perhaps most famous role was as Médée in Medus, which was considered to be a very difficult role. Apparently the original leading singer had fallen ill before the debut so Julie was quickly trained in her stead, but succeeded well and got a lot of praise for the role.

In 1703 Julie started an affair with Madame la Marquise de Florensac, who was said to have been the most beautiful woman in France. This is the affair of hers of which there's most evidence. De Florensac was married and had children, but she was also rumored to have many affairs. Julie lived quietly together with her for two years. They were described by a contemporary to have lived in perfect harmony, always spending time together and only appearing in public when necessarily. Julie deputed in her last role in 1705 and ended her career after De Floransac died of sudden fever. Nothing concrete is known about the rest of her life, not even how or when she died, but she is usually speculated to have died in 1707.

Parsing History from Fantasy

Chronologically the rumor that places earliest in her life was that she had "an affair" with count d’Armagnac (age 46 at the time), before she got married in the same year so as a 14 to 17 year old. There doesn't seem to be any actual evidence of this and even if that really happened, it wouldn't have been an affair, it would have been grooming and sexual violence. Related to it is the rumor that the count arranged her marriage and sent her husband away, but kept her in the court with him. Then she "got bored" of the count and ran away with an assistant sword-master, Séranne, to southern France. They got money by performing fencing matches in fairs and taverns while they were traveling till they got to Marseilles, where she first appeared in opera.

The stories of her in this period are generally written in a super nasty tone, and she (as supposed 14 yo) is written as the seductress and the adult men are written as the victims of her fiery temper and fitfulness. All these stories seem pretty unlikely though. The rumor about the count seems (unfortunately) most possible, but accounts from 18th and 19th century about these early events in her life don't seem to be based on any information from her lifetime. I find it most likely that the writers in 18th and 19th centuries were filling out the blanks we don't know from her life and painting her as this (in their eyes) degenerate seductress from an early age. An alternative possible explanation could have been that she indeed accompanied her husband to south, perhaps near Marseilles, where she then performed with the Marseilles Opéra. Many sources claim though that she performed with her maiden name there, which would be odd if she was living with her husband. I don't know where that claim comes originally, but it could be false of course. Although the generally proposed year of her marriage could also be false, which would explain why she at first performed with her maiden name, and later in Paris and always after that with her husband's name. That would not explain how she ended up going to Marseilles though.

The next and perhaps the most infamous and coolest story of her sets somewhere shortly before 1690. In that story she fell in love with a girl in Marseilles and the girls parents sent her to a convent to avoid a scandal. Julie went to the convent with the premise of wanting to become a novice. They tried to frame the girl's death by putting a dead nun's body into the girls bed and setting it on fire and then went on the run for couple of months. While on the run Julie was sentenced to death in absentia, but after returning to Paris and rekindling her relationship with count d'Armagnac, he got the king to pardon her. As amazing as this story is, it's very likely not true. It seems quite unlikely that the 15 to 19 year old Julie would have done that, but even more unlikely that she'd just get all her charges dropped and these crimes wouldn't have hindered at all her career, which hadn't even properly begun yet. The first surviving description of this incident comes from a letter of her contemporary court lady, Madame Dunoyer, who was basically an early gossip columnist and despised her. Her story doesn't mention Julie at all, but talks about a nun, who tried to frame her own death in a similar manner to escape with her male lover (which still sounds very unlikely story). The first surviving description that attaches that story to Julie, comes year after her death from the very suspect writings of a known liar, Cardinal Debois, who did personally know and hate Julie. He claimed that Dumenil, who was an actor in Paris Opéra the same time as Julie, related him the story, while also acknowledging he probably did it because he too hated her. So very likely not a true story, but possibly something that was rumored during her lifetime already.

In the stories of her, after escaping from the convent and before going to Paris, she traveled again in male attire and met Louis Joseph d'Albert de Luynes von Grimberghen, commonly known as count d'Albert. He was an interesting character in his own right, roughly her age, and like her, his real story is a little hard to parse from the legend (though in his case, he was a nobleman so there's also a lot of actual records of his life). In the story though, he thought she was a man, they had some disagreement, a fight broke out, she won, injured him and nursed him back to health. And then they had a brief affair before d'Albert went to war again. They were lifelong friends, so this is not entirely made up. It's entirely possible they had a brief affair (and according to many stories an on and off type of affair that was re-kindled at many points in their lives) and there was rumors about it even in her lifetime, but the story of this first meeting seems to lack validity.

Next in her stories she met Gabriel-Vincent Thévenard, who was another famous singer and her contemporary, either right before or right after she arrived in Paris. They became lovers and after Thévenard auditioned and got accepted into the Paris Opéra, he helped to get Julie accepted too. It is true that as far as we know, they both debuted in 1690. They were also said to have been life long friends and again it's possible they were lovers at some point, but the details of their meeting are difficult to know.

There are many stories about her antics of both of her times in the Paris Opéra. In those stories she fought duels, assaulted Dumenil with a cane, robbed Dumenil, had fights with men after they insulted her or another women or harassed other women, tried to kill herself after her love was not reciprocated, threatened to shoot a duchess in the head, threatened to slit Cardinal Debois' throat, bit Thévenard in the ear on stage and had affairs with men and women. According to Cardinal Debois the feud between Dumenil and Julie started because Dumenil was interested in her but she rejected him. The Cardinal was a liar but it does sound pretty believable. So if it's true and he spread in retaliation a lie that she burned down a convent, her beating him up or beating him up, stealing his valuables and returning them to him by humiliating him in front of other actors, would align well with everything else told about her personality. Maybe her retaliation wasn't exactly as in the stories, but if the other things about Dumenil were true, I'm sure she retaliated in some way. Same applies to her threatening the Cardinal's life. He wrote about it, but he was a liar, but, but because he was a liar who lied about her, it sounds like something she might do. Madame Dunoyer wrote about her threatening the Duchess of Luxembourg apparently because of jealousy over count d'Albert. The duchess was d'Albert's mistress at one point and apparently he even fought a duel over her in 1700. So there is some validity to this rumor, though the circumstances were perfect to fabricate that kind of rumor. I haven't found as much backing to other rumors, but many of them sound possible or at least maybe rooted in some reality and exaggerated.

The rumored explanation for why she left the Paris Opéra around 1694 was that she went into a court ball in men's clothing, kissed a woman on the dance floor and got challenge to a duel by three noblemen. They went outside and she won, but because dueling was illegal, she had to flee to Bavaria, and later when she returned, she was supposedly pardoned by the king again. In the more sensational versions of the story she killed the noblemen. This whole story is very unlikely. Even count d'Albert was imprisoned for engaging in an illegal duel (the one in 1700). He got eventually pardoned, but he was a nobleman and basically a war hero. The first surviving accounts of this story come much after her dead and it sounds more like a very exaggerated version of the other stories of her. There's many more plausible reason why she would have left to Bavaria. If her contemporaries descriptions of her behavior were even half true, those could have been scandal enough. Or if the rumors of her burning down a convent were circling that time already, that alone could have been damaging enough to her career that she thought it best to leave for a while.

In Bavaria, she's rumored to have another scandal. She supposedly became lover of the Max Emanuel, Elector of Bavaria, but she was too dramatic and after she stabbed herself with a real knife during a performance, the Elector decided she was too much, demanded her to leave Bavaria and gave her money for it. She supposedly threw the money to the feet of the messenger and left. The first surviving account of this story comes again from Madame Dunoyer, the details of which have changed, but were always quite exaggerated and unbelievable. Still the core events might be true, it's possible she was the Elector's lover for a while and it's also possible she stabbed herself on stage for real, being very dramatic as she was.

Was she queer?

There are enough accounts of her attraction and relationships with women from people who actually knew her, that I do find it very likely that she was sapphic. Cardinal Debois even implied she was exclusive interested in women or at least heavily preferred them, though other accounts by the people who knew her did talk about her attraction to men too. Her dressing in men's clothing is also mentioned enough times by her contemporaries that I do believe it. Because gender was so heavily tied to clothing and sexuality and fashion was less about what you wanted to wear and more about what you wanted others to think about you, I think she probably had some gender feelings. Even her aggressive and assertive behavior was very much seen as crossing gender boundaries. There's no more evidence of her feelings on gender than her androgynous presentation, so it's mostly speculation.

In conclusion, she was definitely a flavor of queer.

Julie circa 1700 in opera costume.

The most notable source I used:

Julie D'Aubigny: the 17th Century Sapphic Swordfighting Opera Singer, video by Kaz Rowe - I mentioned this before but it bears repeating

Research page by Jim Burrows - This was great since there's gathered multiple sources on le Maupin, historical and more recent, some of which are hard to access fully otherwise

Julie d'Aubigny: La Maupin and Early French Opera, LAPL blog post - It repeats most of the rumors of questionable origin about her as truth, but the sections about her career, which have more backing than just rumors, are really helpful

Mademoiselle De Maupin; Biographical sketches & anecdotes, The Dublin University Magazine - One of those questionable biographies of her from 1854, really only good as a source of what the rumors were after her death

Chevalier, Louis-Joseph, prince de Grimberghen, essay by Neil Jeffares - Biography of count d'Albert, which includes a lot of unsourced rumors about both le Maupin and d'Albert, but recounts his life events in great detail, and references to each claim show which parts are sourced well

#queer history #history #pride month #art #queer art #lgbtq history #sapphic art #digital art #portrait #historical art #historical queer figure #julie d'aubigny #julie de maupin

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acourtofthought · 12 days

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I read that josh body language post. It’s like they’re living in a completely different universe! I mean, seriously, these are the same people who tried to redefine “skittered” and somehow thought it would be a great idea to dive into fly fishing. Because, you know, nothing screams “literary genius” quite like a detailed breakdown of a fishing term and thinking that's exactly what Sarah had in mind. 🙄

Like, do they think Sarah wrote skittered hoping her most dedicated fly fishing fanatics would understand. 😂 Because I can’t imagine a single person outside that niche who cares about how a word used for darting fish could possibly relate to body language IN a romance book.

This is what their post said:

Skitter (v) - to draw (bait) jerkily across the surface of the water as a technique in fishing

The fact that Azriel's shadows skittered back could imply that they actually wanted Elain; that they were trying to draw her in, for whatever reason.

You know, having opposite intent of recoiling.

Honestly, it’s impressive how they manage to spin these absurd narratives. Incorporating fishing lingo into their analysis of character relationships. “Oh, his shadows totally skittered away, just like a trout escaping a hook!". 😂😂😂😂

These folks are really grasping at straws, and it’s hilariously cringeworthy. Keep it coming, though—this level of delusion is pure entertainment!

If you ever watch any of Sarah's interviews where Josh is present you see he's a bit of a fidgety guy. Also both Sarah and Josh become evasive when they're tip-toeing around questions that they know Bloomsbury might want them to answer in a certain way so as not to give anything away. I would bet money on the fact that he has absolutely zero emotions towards the possibility of Gwyn and Az together, that he is 100% supportive of what Sarah chooses to do with her characters. It's wild that they'll believe reading the body language of Josh is somehow a major clue while completely ignoring Sarah's friend directly saying "I don't think E/riel is happening." That they'll ignore Sarah laughing at the theory they had of Gwyn being a child but Josh somehow has skin in the game over who Az ends up with.

To your point about skittering. My guess is that a seasoned author is going for the obvious definition of skittering in her writing and not the answer that only those with fly-fishing terminology awareness have. Not to mention Sarah made sure we understand the point Az was making when he followed it up with "they'd always been prone to vanish when she was around." How can anyone claim that in one breath he's suggesting they're trying to lure her in when the next sentence literally tells us they often disappear around her. You know, that's the same issue I have when they try to claim Elain's scent of Jasmine and Honey has anything to do with night blooming Jasmine. First off, Jasmine is first mentioned in the Spring Court (book 1). But also, Sarah followed up "jasmine" and "honey" with "like a promise of SPRING." Is that not the author nudging you in the direction of her meaning? Especially when later we have Nesta thinking how the SPRING COURT had been MADE for someone like Elain? I guess they'll keep seeing what the want to see but I don't think they're going to like what the end result looks like.

#anti e/riel

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seemycee · 9 months

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🦢 𝙈𝙀𝙍𝘾𝙐𝙍𝙔 𝙎𝙌𝙐𝘼𝙍𝙀 𝙎𝘼𝙏𝙐𝙍𝙉: 𝘿𝙀𝘽𝙍𝙄𝙀𝙁 🦢

• so here we are again having another debrief this time about the aspect “mercury squared saturn”. i have a lot to say about her, so i suggest you get comfortable cause i will be rambling. as always i’m writing from my own perspective of having this as my tightest aspect. of course you may not 100% align with what i’m saying cause charts differ, but i’m always writing from a place of being informative and just good ole fun. picture me and this post as a fish, tumblr as my fishbowl and you guys are observing me and my behavior. for context, my 6h aquarius mercury is squaring my 9h taurus saturn.

• out of all my aspects i have in my chart i think this is the hardest, and i have so many so you know i’m serious. people who have this aspect are one the highest strongest soldiers, especially the ones who haven’t overcame it and still manage to exist.

• this aspect manifested in my life in such a strange way and out of nowhere. when i was a child, i had a very high-pitched voice. not the normal young squeaky little kid voice. it gave very much did you suck the helium out of balloons every morning??? this probably has more to do with my aquarius mercury conjunct uranus, but i’m painting a picture for you guys. mostly a lot of people liked my voice minus my father, and a few kids in my school. who assumed i was putting on a voice and should’ve grown out of said voice at 10???

• so because the constant harassment of my voice, i started speaking in a more soft-spoken tone, as not to draw attention to my voice. then on top of that, i wouldn’t talk much so when i started attending middle school people assumed i was shy when in fact, i was the furthest thing from shy. but the thought of publicly speaking, after being judged, so harshly at a young age, gave me really bad anxiety. that i just recently overcame at 21 years old.

• having this aspect 🫱🏾‍🫲🏼 being highly critical of yourself. this hit me like a ton of bricks because mercury is my chart ruler plus i’m a virgo rising so you know, every little thing about myself, i hated. especially during my hormonal teenage years. i used to constantly have this nervous tick where i would pull my shirt back into place after it started bunching up. another one i had where i’m constantly brushing my eyebrow back into place. i always thought people were looking at me. so in my head, i thought trying to be perfect. all the time would spare me being judged.

• the constant, putting myself down was another big one with this aspect. i ruined so many opportunities for myself when i was younger. i let the thoughts of being inadequate get too loud and scare me. i could be 100% qualified to do something, and i would somehow still think i’m completely unqualified to do it. even with people gassing me up. which i hate now as an adult cause, i don’t even think twice about doing something now.

• like most things touched by saturn. things got better overtime. being insecure about every little thing forced me to work harder and perfect my crafts. funny thing is it took me working in the real world and dealing with people 24/7. for me to be able to shed my anxious skin of my teen self. cause.

1. started to realize nobody cared and we all have our own issues we’re dealing with

2. started noticing people don’t perceive me the way i perceive myself

3. i was caught up in a outdated way of viewing myself that i didn’t notice the change and development of myself

• on a lighter note another way this aspect manifested for me is me being a history nut. i love all types of history, especially music history. i’m like a human shazam. think of the most obscure song playing in a store and i bet you, i can name the artist performing the song and give you details about their career. i also consume an unhealthy amount of history content from youtube. mainly old true crime and beauty practices from different time periods.

• also another thing i noticed with this aspect is not being able to share your ideas. i remember wanting to contribute to certain things then going never mind because i thought my ideas were dumb. then having people pull my teeth to get me to share and be blown away with said ideas. ex: all my friends up here in ny make drill music or r&b music. then you have me over here going against the grain composing new wave/post disco music which is just disco music without the beat overpowering the vocals. i’ve been doing this in private for weeks and i didn’t wanna share it with my friends or mother cause i didn’t think it was urban enough and that it was a silly idea that wasn’t gonna go anywhere and i just fall back into writing regular r&b music. i ended up telling them cause i like new wave a lot more than r&b music and i’m passionate about it. they actually liked the direction i’m going in, so it wasn’t silly idea after all.

• lastly i was so late to social media in terms of taking pictures of myself and posting them online. omg i used to hate the idea of even exposing myself in that manner. my friend literally had to beg me to join instagram, now all i do is over share and post my outfits. this makes sense since mercury deals with social media and saturn with delays and restrictions. i was already on internet for a long time and had a lot of notoriety on twitter during the mid to late 10s but nobody knew “me” cause i didn’t wanna be known as myself. even when i did start posting myself i started comparing myself to other people and it got bad so quick. i literally used to build up my instagrams just to delete them when i got self conscious. my friends used to hate that cause i used to get a lot of likes and would promote them. *in my gwen stafani voice* : i’m just a girl 🥲

𝙄𝙉 𝘾𝙊𝙉𝘾𝙇𝙐𝙎𝙄𝙊𝙉

• even though this is a very mentally taxing aspect there’s still a lot of positive that it creates once you learn your worth and see your power. i went from being very unsure of myself and constantly self sabotaging cause of intrusive thoughts. to now being fully confident in myself and everything that i do. due to me working and constantly bettering myself as a person. that’s not an easy thing to do but it’s not impossible and everyone will get there at their own pace. 🫂

#astro community #astrology observations #astro notes #astro tumblr #astrology #astrology placements #mercury #saturn #astrology tumblr #astrology community #astrology notes

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silviakundera · 2 months

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Snowfall watch comments ep 11-12

Ep 11

Vamp Daddy is feeling violated and would like some clothes now, thx. "You keep staring at me. Even if you don't feel embarrassed, I do feel a sense of shame."

Sorry, the villain is erotically, psychotically obssesed with you, so no

Loser Li: "Aren't you a big shot? Aren't you a socialite? You think you're above me just because of your wealth and power?"

Vamp Daddy:

Literal army observing the toxic gay happenings: ... um I think that was supposed to be your inside voice

Mu Lihua is obviously making excuses to herself to use the magic yang ring, which is killing her

BACKSTORY: in which it was all the fault of Vamp Daddy'd grandma for deciding to burn alive both his dad's chicken killing concubine and also her son. Sorry grandma, burning a small child alive while he screams for his big brother is uncool and I'm not surprised she went berserk and killed y'all. 🤷

If that kid grew up to be our mildly evil doctor bestie, I think u 2 should hug it out and say bygones are bygones. Yes he gave you some vampirism but also, you survived 100 years to experience some great fashion choices and meet an incredibly weird blind girl who is very into you. It's not all bad.

Loser Li is literally crying here, just barely hanging into any dignity by a thread, while Vamp Daddy calls him out as looking heartbroken. 🌈

MORE BACKSTORY: Loser Li ran into Vamp Daddy when a teen and naively thought this rich dude could magically fix his sister w his rich people powers. Except some people shot up the joint and Vamp Daddy ran away and his sis died. No magic fix for his sister. No one else to blame, so he hates himself and the (handsome) stranger that he'd unrealistically pinned his hopes on.

Loser Li has all that pent up rage bewing inside, yet still takes time out of his busy gangster schedule to sit on bed beside Vamp Daddy and removing his muzzle, "If you want to escape, that's fine. We can both die together if it comes to that."

More flirting, angst, bars

"You did well."

oh... kay

Loser Li's boss wants to just dispose of Vamp Daddy if the scans don't show anything else exciting. I do not think Loser Li is gonna accept this.

Any more than I can accept more screentime for nepo baby. At least it smoked out doctor bestie!

Jin nepo baby is kinda being used as a plausible deniability There Is A Hetro Explanation For This on Loser Li's character. Except not really, because his behavior and words are also internally consistent with her being a childhood playmate when a sevant kid, who now he wants to draw the line with for multiple reasons (the best one being, he's a murderer & active criminal). Also, bisexuality exists.

Ep 12

We're bringing the gf and doctor bestie along for the ride! Thanks Loser Li, I missed them.

I can barely recognize my fav loser in brown leather.

The trio reunited!

Doctor Bestie is so annoyed that Vamp Daddy keeps being defeated by Loser Li, when he could simply solve this all by killing him

Is Doctor Bestie gonna clock the Mu heir?

Vamp Daddy offers Loser Li both money and 🌈 friendship 🌈 and he's soooooooo shook

Mu Lihua having more seizures because she can't let go of her mood ring. smh.

Midly Evil Doctor Bestie: some people evade all responsibilities and some people bear them all, to feel alive. He's the latter.

Me: and you're the 1st kind, right? right????

Really love his chill. I want to know what's behind it. 🕵

Vamp Daddy alone in a room with Loser Li and very deliberately seducing him while pretending not to: "I will perish together with you." It's the guy I care about, not the girl. People can want & feel multiple things at a time. I didn't know you then but I do now - we know each other.

seriously - the way the actor for Li Yingliang does this swallow at him saying they know each other well now and then Vamp Daddy nods in assent. The body language and his face.👌👌👌

Fuck, Vamp Daddy knows he hooked him

Vamp Daddy and Sus Doctor play Mahjong with the villians and I'm fairly certain they're just fucking with them.

Loser Li looks annoyed to be losing yet again in life but tbh what result do you expect when gambling with someone 100+ years old

The allusions to his brother !!! Is the doctor his brother???? If so DOES HE SUSPECT?? ?????

Vamp Daddy trying to hard sell Loser Li until the last moment. Run away w me and join my polycule. I have riches and also, I'm me 👁👄👁

I think our fav villainous bisexual is just scared to take what he wants.

He is convinced there's no way back after you sell your soul to the local warlord and is scared to contemplate the alternative; if he walks away now, that means he could have found a way to walk away before - which means he's partially culpable for the wrong he's done.

They're staring at each other thru the window now. It's very romantic.

#snowfall #cdrama #silvia watches

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thedevilinmybrain · 2 years

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my babygate thoughts after watching AOTV

I want to start off by saying that these are just my opinions and I am in no way, shape, or form indicating that I am apologizing or justifying my believed closeting of a queer individual. Nor am I making apologies for someone that I do not know nor will ever know. That being said, I do feel that I am allowed to draw my own personal conclusions given the evidence presented before us and make my own critical decision based on the content.

I do not believe Freddie is Louis' son. I honestly will never believe that he is biologically Louis' son.

That being said, I do think that AOTV did an interesting job of framing the Louis/Freddie relationship in the midst of talking about his family and the role he is so often put in. For instance, I believe that AOTV is more of a film of self discovery and reconciliation of the self than anything else. It's framed about one man's struggle to find where he belongs and if he even deserves it. So in some ways, it's an introspective film about Louis' outlook on himself as an artist, as a brother, as a friend, and as an individual.

Given the way that Louis and his sisters talk about him, Louis has always been in the role of 'protector' and 'big brother'. Even in the band, there was a sense that Louis was the oldest and that he was 'the boss' because of his skill in voicing and sticking up for the rest of the boys. We have seen it time and time again from the way he's protective of his siblings to the way he was always so involved in the `1D days. This is a man who prides himself on taking care of others and making the best of situations - a fact that I will bring up later.

When it comes to babygate and the deals and trauma that surround that, I do believe that Louis had limited say in the matter. Much like the example in the film of the producer that gave Louis hope but ultimately did his own decision on the song, Louis' life in One Direction didn't come without a slew of managers and music company people who had a say in it and made decisions. I do not think at the beginning that Louis was allowed to give much imput or control over the happenings behind the scene. As 1D went on break and Louis was able to navigate his own career with a little more freedom, I do think that input changed but considering how much of his life is hidden behind contracts and NDAs, I don't think the truth will ever be told in its entirety. And honestly, I am okay with that because at the end of the day, it's Louis' life and I am just an observer.

So, when it comes to Freddie now, I am of the opinion that Louis is more of an 'uncle' or 'family friend' to him. Given the limited amount of time we actually know they spend together, probably equal to how much Louis has seen Doris and Ernie, one can speculate that Louis isn't a constant in Freddie's life. More of a randomly visiting family memmber than a core fixture. We never hear Freddie call him Dad. We see Freddie multiple times look at the camera during the film and on other occasions such as the holidays where it feels like he's being prompted to interact with the family. It's the same feeling of seeing an uncle at Christmas that you haven't seen in ages. You know them but you're not 100% comfortable.

So, why even bother? Why does Louis make any effort at all?

I think it comes down to him being in the role of protective older brother. If there is nothing he can do about babygate, if there is nothing he can change about the narrative now, the very least he can do is make positive memories with an innocent child. I mean, what would fandom prefer? Every time they're stunted together that Louis just ignores Freddie like he's Eleanor? Found somewhere in the background looking miserable?

It's making the best out of the worst situation. Because one day, someone is going to explain all of this to Freddie. And yes, I do believe it's unfair and it's cruel to the child, but we also don't know what he's being told as his own narrative. Maybe he knows Louis as his 'Uncle Lou' or 'The UK family'. We just don't know. But what we do know is that when Louis is with him, he takes on the role of big brother. He plays with him, he gives him good memories, he provides experiences just like he did/does for his younger siblings. It's shown in the film with the way he kisses the baby twins. It's Louis being a stand in 'father figure' or 'big brother'.

I'm not saying it's right or that it's the way it should be. Honestly, I don't think closeting should be a thing at all. It's grossly unfair to everyone involved. But the Louis I know, the man we've all loved from the very beginning, would never allow himself to be cruel or cold to someone innocent. And I think he's doing the best that he can given the circumstances.

And I hope one day when Freddie finds out the truth, at the very least he can look back and be like 'Yes, this was unfair and unjust and completely inappropriate. But all I know of this man is the kindness and the fun and the good times. He didn't cause me more pain.'

#babygate #louis tomlinson #my thoughts

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achillean-knight · 10 months

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MY INTERPRETATION OF SCRAPTRAP - GORE WARNING OBVIOUSLY -

Honestly, I did this just for the fun of it because of a theory video I watched detailing the OP's thoughts on why Scraptrap... looks like he does. I like Scraptrap, he's goofy but I saw potential, so I gave a crack at it :3! This took me roughly 4 days? maybe 3, to complete, Not 100% satisfied with the result but it was a blast to draw! Oh, and little theories and extras for why I did what I did with this design under the cut.

(Also, Tumblr quality is ABYSMEL OH MY GOD)

The text reads as follows: "Because of similarities, I used aspects of Golden Freddy in my design. Importantly, the more "Golden" parts are Golden Freddy, while the dark green is Spring Bonnie. (Look at Springtrap.)"

That's basically all you need to know! But other things I wanna go into more about:

The Muzzle is a weird shape that scarily resembles that of Withered Golden Freddy. We haven't seen a rabbit like Animatronic with a square-shape like that, reserved only for withered G.Freddy & withered Freddy. I wanted to emphasize the colour of the muzzle to be more golden like Scrap-traps muzzle, to both highlight its drastic change from Springtrap (where he didn't even have a different muzzle colour) and to further bring home the idea it's Golden Freddy. Also he has buck teeth probably bc Peepaw wanted it to be more rabbit like lmao

It'd make sense for Golden Freddy to be used for the repairment of the suit due to the character being from the same restaurant as Spring Bonnie, so they'd be made of the same materials and would probably be easiest to use for repairs. I also believe that Golden Freddy would be at the same location as Springtrap in FNAF 3, due to the easter egg of either shadow or golden Freddy appearing by your side in the office (idk what one it is). If that's Golden Freddy, then if the Spring Bonnie suit could survive the fire of Fazbears Fright, then why can't the Golden Freddy suit?

My last point to make about G. Freddy being used in my design, is that apparently people theorise Cassidy is the one tormenting Will in hell. After the crying child moved on in the Happiest Day minigame, Cassidy remained. IDK if it's possible, but if Will merged some of the golden Freddy suit with his own, could the soul follow suit? (Kinda a stretch but it'd explain why William is haunted by G.Freddy and also has weirdly similar design elements from Golden Freddy in his Scrap Trap design.)

Nonetheless, this was just to test my skills. Happy but not with the design overall, I like the more withered look with random pops of colour here and there to differentiate from the original Springtrap. Admittedly, I rushed the rest at the end (the legs) and it shows. Not happy with that choice, but I wanted to move on from this project, honestly.

I think the main thing I wanted to keep was the bones tbh, hence why you see more than just his skull and fingers this time around. Also yes! Goofy arm returns due to the overwhelming "Yes" on my poll JHGFDSH

#scraptrap #springtrap #william afton #golden freddy #fnaf #five nights at freddy's #redesign #design #my art

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transremylebeau · 6 days

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More dadbit thoughts I have

-he lets his kid braid his hair

-he’s his kid’s biggest supporter and defender

-remy hides his hurt whether it be emotional or physical, when his kid does the same he tells them that they shouldn’t be doing that while the kid says “but you do it”, which made remy realize he needs to stop doing it to set an example

-👏dad👏bod👏gambit

-this is from the headcanon I have of the kid making him homemade playing cards, remy will use these cards everytime he plays with his kid and as the kid gets older they want to use regular playing cards

“Dad please let’s use regular play cards I don’t even know what this is (card with a drawing of a mermaid)”

“But ya made these for me😢”

♥️💯♥️💯 I Love these, your take on gambit is so cute, an i love how you draw him.

I go in order 🕺an i go crazy

-i wanna draw him getting his hair braided thats so cute, im imagining while his kid braids his hair, rogue is getting her hair done by remy...like a little chain.

-ok this fr ahh this child is so safe. and he would do anything for them...

Slightly related to that, tbh I like to think hes still chaotic when he does stuff for them like hey kiddo wanna see whats inside this building thats closed to everyone. But us. We can go in. Its fine. (Like idk why i hc him having a kid specifically who cant always be around loud noises and crowds so maybe sometimes he just very easily gets them into places like museums and stuff after closing so they can enjoy it. Tho tbh i can see him just being able to have connections to do this shit lol. He just Always knows a guy. Gambit is the King of Being Owed One. Just remembered i already mentioned my silly disney thing but i think its cuter if hes doing this specifically to get them a getter experience. But defintely also to be a cool dad lol)

- remy realizing hes an example like 100 times a day when his kid hits teenhood fr 😭

-i am 100% clapping my hands to the tune of dadbod gambit 👍 thats very cute to me. I find it funny that ppl try to say its impossible for gambit to have any amount of body fat ever, when i know for a fact if he quits smoking its so over for his abs lmao. High metab or not. And like if we hc him older at this point it makes even more sense.

- For real obsessed with your card hc cause thats fr how i imagine it going. Maybe when theyre a teen theyre like moody about it theyre like whatever dad just use them as bombs and remy is like

And I imagine he gets one of those binders you keep baseball cards in to preserve them lol

Literally how i imagine remy reacting to anything his kid gives him:

#hc #dadbit #YEEE

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navstuffs · 1 year

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The Pact

Pairing: Demon!Carlos Oliveira x GN!Reader

Summary: Living in a time where anything out of the ordinary is considered demoniac, your current dreams about a man, while a disease strikes your village, might put you in danger.

Warning tags: HORROR FIC (14+), ignorant people, small stalker behavior from Carlos.

Author's Notes: fic 100% based on the end of vvitch movie and on the declaration on the church from Lestat to Louis in "Interview with the Vampire" (amc version). enjoy your reading and happy friday 13th!!

my hallowen's masterlist

You have never been normal. The sixth infant, the first (and only) to pass the age of five years old, you were curious since the start: "Where do the stars come from, Mommy? How does fruit grow from plants? How does the fire burn? What happens after we die?"

Your parents, thrilled about finally having a kid, didn't care much about your inquisitive personality. You would eventually give up on those questions and become a normal child like the others.

Oh, how they were mistaken.

As you hit the teenage years, the merchant started to sell you books. The people from the village thought it was funny to see you walking around with an old book with no drawings. It wasn't like anyone would teach you how to read.

Your mom was the first one to realize you were actually reading the book. She knew a few words herself, and when she asked you what these were, you answered them correctly. When questioned how you knew this, you simply shrugged, stating, "I just do."

After having to promise that you would never tell anyone in your village you taught yourself how to read, your thirst for knowledge grew even more. Everything forbidden sure tastes better. It wasn't something your parents could stop you at this point, but they could only hope no one ever came to find out about this. It could put you in grave danger.

You are running. Surrounded by tall black trees, you run into an open corridor. You don't feel any branches hurting your bare feet and aren't out of breath, so you suspect this is a dream. The only thing on the horizon is a distant orange light.

As you get closer and closer to the light, you swear you can feel the smell of fire, something burning. You stop by an open space, finding the people of your village in a circle and, in the middle of them, a massive blaze. Your breathing seems to stop as you push the crowd away. Your worst fears are confirmed when you see your dear library being burned.

You turn around, facing the town leader, Percy, and before you can start to ask the reason for all of this, you notice he has no mouth. None of them have. They just stare at the fire as if enchanted, paying you no attention. You cover your mouth with your hands, holding back a scream.

And that's when you see him. The one from your dreams, appearing in the middle of the crowd.

He is tall, wearing a black long coat and boots. His black eyes shine with the orange light, different from everyone else's completely soulless. You want to run away, but your feet are locked into the floor. It is just a dream, he can't hurt you. He stops in front of you, observing you and up and down.

That's when you notice you are naked. Not one single piece of clothing on. Your eyes widen with fear as the man slowly approaches you, his hand raising to touch your face. His hand is warm and comforting, gentle in your cheek.

"We meet again." He speaks, his voice smooth as his touch. "So pretty…so lost."

You close your eyes, not wanting to see more. Incredibly, you don't feel fear. No, you are just eager? Nervous? But no fear. Just waiting for what is supposed to happen, happen. You and the man know this.

"We will meet again soon. Now it is time to wake up."

You wake up with a loud knock on your door. You raise yourself from the bed, confused and startled. You are not used to visitors: your parents passed away years ago, and it was just you now. You didn't even have friends anymore, especially after the disease started.

Everyone eventually got sick except for you. Everyone lost a family member except you (your parents were already dead, but the village members didn't seem to care about that part). You started noticing the strange stares, angry whispers, and even kids pointing in your direction, calling you a sorcerer. A seed of the devil. That behavior just made you more reclusive, which you figure is how you didn't get sick.

Another loud knock on your door wakes you from your trance. You get up from the bed, spying through a crack in your wall: a crowd is outside your house. You gulp, not wanting to open the door, Percy's voice telling you to get out or they will come inside. You, still in your sleeping clothing, open the door, a fierce expression in your eyes. Indeed, the whole village is there, holding torches. You are surprised they don't have pitchforks. Leading the group, Percy.

"What is it?" Your tone of defiance scandalized half of the crowd, but you didn't care. They hated you anyway for being different.

"We need you to come with us," Percy announces to some murmurs of agreement.

"What if I don't?"

Percy nods slightly to the strong men at his sides, who seem to hesitate momentarily before they move forward, grabbing you one by each arm. You struggle as they pull you into the middle of the crowd, opening a circle. You try to ignore the similarity with your dream earlier as Percy proclaims your name.

"You have been accused of witchcraft! We, in a consensus, have understood you are most definitely the cause of the plague that has killed so many." As he says that, circling you around, they let go of your arms, but you cannot escape. You are trapped. The villagers stare at you with disgust, fear, and anger.

"Witchcraft? Don't I have a chance for a fair judgment?" Percy seems to ignore your questions, explaining your crimes to the crowd. Your anger builds up in your chest; you have no chance to defend yourself, no chance of a fair trial. The unfairness of the treatment that started when you were a kid. They always had looked for a reason to burn you.

You look down, feeling defeated as the anger burns your mouth. Your body shakes as you look for a way to escape. Percy continues inflaming the crowd, more angry screams directed at you.

"Burn! BURN! BURN!"

You should have left. You should have left as soon as your parents died and never looked back.

The smell of burning hits your nose, and you raise your head to watch them fire your small garden. The one you with your mom and dad with so much care. You want to beg them to stop, but what use? In the court of public opinion, you are guilty of being born.

You are alone. Always have been.

The face of the man of your dreams flashes in your mind as the crowd's attention goes to your house. Inflamated by Percy's screams, they take their frustrations to your home. You, on the other hand, perceive the presence behind you before the men keeping you. It is him.

Wearing the same coat over his messy black hair, he strolls towards you. You want to pinch yourself, believe you are still in bed, still dreaming. He stops right before you, unnoticed by everyone else except you. He kneels until your eyes stare back at his dark ones.

"I told you we would meet again." You are too shocked to answer. The world is spinning much slower now, except for you and him.

"Who are you?" You whisper.

"I go by many names, but you can call me Carlos."

"Is this another dream?"

"No. Not this time."

Carlos gives you a moment to assimilate the whole situation before he speaks again.

"I can help you. I can take you away, far away from all of this. This place hated you for being what you are. I can take you somewhere you can be who you truly are."

You listen to Carlos, his eyes shining with the fire around you. It sounds tempting, too close, so you can grab it with your hands. But what would be the consequences? You are too smart to know that when someone offers you so much, they ask you for more. You barely know Carlos anyway, just finding him in projections of your mind. Carlos, as if reading your mind, smiles.

"It sounds insane, I know. Look around yourself," Carlos points to your home burning. Your garden. Frozen people screaming as they burn down the little you loved, the little you had, "You have lived around insanity for too long. I give you a chance of escape, I give you hope. All you have to do is nod that little head of yours, and you will be presented with wonders never seen by no human eyes."

It sounds tempting. It sounds too tempting. What do you really have to lose?

A slight nod is all Carlos needs to take you away.

You nod, and Carlo's smile grows.

Your surroundings finally go back to normal speed. The men near you jump away, alarmed as they notice Carlos near you. Almost as if he appeared out of thin air. Carlos gives you his hand, and you accept it. He raises you from the floor, covering you with his cloak. Percy walks toward you two, pointing his index finger.

"Who are you? Where are you taking our prisoner?"

Carlos, shielding you from all of that insanity, answers with a low and dangerous tone.

"They don't belong to you to torment anymore. I would advise you to keep your distance."

Percy is shocked as Carlos starts pulling you away. The next set of events seems too fast to your mind to register: someone screams it's the Devil, and Carlos whispers for you to close your eyes. You can hear the screams, the smell of flesh burning, and Percy begging for his life in a pleading voice.

You are lying inside a wagon when you open your eyes again (or regain consciousness). It is dark, and you notice the stars up in the sky. There is no moon tonight. Carlos leads a majestic black stallion; you won't be surprised if he has red eyes. You don't ask about what happened in your village as you sit at his side, simply choosing silence.

"You are okay?" You nod. "Aren't you going to ask me about what happened?" You shake your head, looking ahead. "Good."

It is not that you aren't curious, but you simply don't care enough about what happened to them. They never cared about you, so why should you care for them?

"Where are you taking me?"

"I told you. We have a deal: I will take you where you can live your life how you want."

"Are you the Devil?" There it is. You finally ask what has been in your chest.

"Do I look like the devil?" Carlos laughs.

"I don't know. It doesn't matter anyway." You simply answer, shrugging, "Anything is better than before."

Carlos nods, his dark eyes watching you sideways. Maybe he shouldn't tell you now that he is indeed a demon, banished from hell, searching for someone to form a pact with him so he could regain full power. It couldn't be anyone. It had to be someone special. Maybe Carlos shouldn't tell you he had been keeping an eye on you since you were a child, his promised mate for life, the special human he needed to have. No, all of that could wait.

Now, you can finally look forward to the beginning of your new life, and Carlos will make sure you have one. No matter the cost.

taglist: @90sbee, @roseglazedlens, @scar-crossedlvrs, @daydreamrot. if you would like to be tagged in my halloween event, please let me know.

#carlos oliveira x reader #carlos oliveira x you #carlos oliveira #carlos oliveira fanfics #carlos oliveira fanfic #carlos oliveira horror #honestly not entirely happy with this????? but imagine having a demon bf giving all you want?? GOOD ENDING FOR READER #bad ending for humanity lol

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chainofhyrule · 9 months

Note

🥣 anons back! (Did I submit an ask for both of your accounts? Maybe.) SO we all know that scene where Sky is playing his harp because he misses Zelda, so assuming he would do the same for reader when he misses them, how would the rest of the boys cope with missing their dear, sweet reader?

Yo wait-

This one makes me so sad like what-

long post ahead 😭

Okay okay okay— Sky with the harp. Playing songs that his partner always used to request from him. Songs that they love. Yes. 100%.

Four, I think, would hold onto something physical of his partner’s. Keeping a little trinket of some sort that they made for him, or wrote, or drew. Loves reading it every night if it’s a writing, or memorising every detail of it if it’s a drawing. If it’s a physical trinket, he will 100% hold it in his sleep. He once physically slapped Wars when the captain tried to take it, and since then, no one has gone anywhere near his bag.

Time, I think, would pick flowers. No one ever remarks on it, nor do they ever try to ask him what he’s doing. They tried, once, but never managed to will up the courage to do it when they saw the sad look in his eyes. When his longing for his partner is really bad, he will carry the flower as they walk, and will literally get sad if he loses it. Then, proceeds to find another one. It’s the only time they ever really see him as the child hero he once was, because the way he picks flowers, looking for them even, is just so soft and small that they often find it hard to believe that this is their Old Man.

Legend wouldn’t do much, I think. At least, not so obviously. He strikes me as the kind to just stare up at the sky, or over the land, or out across the sea. Just staring out, hoping that, in whatever timeline his partner was in or where he’d left them, that they were looking out over the same view as he was. He hates the feeling of missing people, thanks to Koholint, but the feeling of missing his partner back home is an oddly nostalgic, sweet feeling. If the day is particularly bad, he’ll draw in the dirt, or mud, or sand.

Twilight, in my mind, would try to just distract himself in nature. In whatever way he can. Though, if it’s dark, he will find or make a source of light. Man cannot be in the dark if he’s missing his partner, because it sends his mind down a spiralling path of whether or not he’ll see them again. It only got worse after he’d gotten wounded by the Shadow. Most days/nights when he misses his partner, he will stare into the light, or look up at the sky.

Hyrule, when he misses his partner, will make an attempt to be as close to any member of the group as he can. Unlike the others, he likes the comfort of being near another person, and finding comfort in their company. He won’t be clingy or anything like that, but he will remain close to someone. His favourites to be around are Wild and Four, surprisingly enough, when he misses his partner. He finds joy in being able to talk and laugh with them, to somewhat fill the void of his partner’s absence from his side.

Wind, I think, would clutch something on his own person. Either his sister’s telescope, or maybe the fairy pendant, or even just twisting his hands. It doesn’t help much, but if he tries hard enough, he can kinda imagine that it’s his partner’s hand he’s holding, or maybe his partner’s curious examination of his things. He relies mostly on his thoughts and memories to soothe his longing, though the things that helps most is to just sit on the beach, under the sun, if they’re close enough to one for him to be able to do so.

Warriors’ habits when he misses his partner, are to forgo maintaining himself. It’s a jarring and odd sight for the rest of the boys, for sure, when the day or days come when Wars walks around with his hair disheveled from sleep, or his shirt untucked, or wearing his scarf lopsided or haphazardly. It was so weird the first time. But as it happens a bit more often, he actually willingly explains that it is because he misses his partner. That also surprises them, and understandably so. He explains that his partner would oftentimes help him in the morning, when he was too tired to do so himself. Combing his hair back, or fixing his collar, or adjusting his scarf. No one says anything more on the matter…though sometimes they’ll help him by fixing his scarf, or collar for him. They leave the hair, though.

Finally, as for when Wild misses his partner, he will be, on those particular days, calm. If he’s reckless and headstrong with his brothers, then he’s even worse with his partner back home. Though when he finds that he misses them, he will take it back a level, or three. Because he wants to make sure, more so on those days than on any other, that he can make it back to them alive. Or, when it’s already a calm day, he’ll make their favourite food for dinner. Or a special dessert.

#Feel free to use these if you’d like #I love this ask #Totally wouldn’t mind if anyone else wants to build on or elaborate better on these #chain answers #🥣 anon

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blushblushbear · 23 days

Text

Some Natsu Headcanons

Been thinking a bit about Natsu, and this I guess also counts as roughly my version of Natsu

still have a drawing of him sitting unfinished on my computer and while I wanted to not post about this until I had a pic to go along with it, if I wait for me to get off my ass and draw we will all be waiting forever rip

BUT ANYWAYS

Younger than Fuyu but older than Haru

hey were all under the curse for 200 years (and I fully believe they stopped aging/growing while under the curse), which means Fuyu was 885, Haru was 259 and Aki was 19--- I think this leaves Natsu somewhere in his 600's-- maybe 669 cause eyyy ;3

also meaning he had 6/7 tails (another headcanon but I believe each 100 years they get a tail unless they somehow earn a tail via growing their powers hence why Fuyu got to have nine)

Natsu extremely bishonen

he's one of those bishis that looks like he's mad gay

except he's not

but he's def not straight either

actually p sexual-- p sensual

just as big of a flirt as Haru

not in the same way, he likes a little more gentler, softer, more teasing

very sly and playful

he was also mad childish

in a more calm and collected way than Aki but def childish all the same

also a bit petty

honestly him and Fuyu were a lot alike that way

that's why they either go on like gang busters or were at each others throats

there was no in between

frankly they liked being hauty and petty together

would have tea and talk so much shit

but Natsu was WAYYYY more laid back

but he was also secretly way more serious and cut throat than his sly little fox persona would lead you to believe

honestly the only one who ever saw that was Fuyu

Fuyu both deeply admired him and was also very afraid of him

Natsu was very childish after all

who knows how far he'd go to get his way

while all the kitsune took part in the clan war and ultimately made it happen

Fuyu has always suspected Natsu may have fanned some flames and pulled some strings to help it along

all the same, everyone's actions were their own decision

Natsu like Fuyu also had a love of poetry

just generally the picture of a beautiful sensual fox boy here to make you swoon and also maybe laugh a little

was really good at charming people

charmed all the other kitsune frankly

even if they didn't always trust him

well-- Aki did, but that's cause Aki didn't know any better

calls the player Mochi

'My sweet little Mochi'

'There you are my little Mochi'

could def see this dude going yandere not even as an au style version lol

he really was that dude that acted like an innocent child but was also plotting your murder just in case ya know

liked to pit people against each other cause he thought it was funny

like I said-- PETTY. CHILDISH.

was very into ink painting

but also very into lounging around

a smooth talker, a charmer, a deceiver, a fox through and through

also if he did a phone fling he'd use the fuck out of emoticons/kaomoji (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) .ᐟ.ᐟ

frankly want him to come back as a ghost but he texts you first

also doesn't seem to hold a grunge about being killed

(OR DOES HE???)

lol nah ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡

unless.... ( •̀ - •́ )

#bear text #blush blush game #blush blush #sad panda studios #bb game #kitsune bundle #Natsu #blush blush Natsu #Natsu blush blush #fan Natsu #oc #Natsu oc

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emin-folly · 3 months

Note

Ok, can I ask for:

7. Auction

10. Bargin

11. Bard

14. Barry horse

18. Barry Jesse

24. Barry Superman 2

29. Battle of the fashion tastes

36. Cats

37. Cheetah

39. Clark reading Cinderella

40. Compromise

42. Cover flash

45. Crackship doodles

53. DC Barry and Kitty

55. DC Barry's obsession

56. DC Barry's weird fears

58. DC dad brawls

59. DC aeo styles

66. DC hole in the ground

73. DC nobody wants to save thawne

76. DC Slade's new pet

79. DC Speedsters and abugs

82. DC ableached

83. DC Furries

85. DC OC

90. Deer style

91. Flash AU doodles

97. Drunk Barry

100. Eohal

101. Eo medieval

108. Eo wants commitment

111. Eobard ivy doodles

115. Eobeth

116. Eo Carol

137. Gertrude

138. GL headaches

139. GL Human Infestation

144. Hamlet

150. Horse

155. Iris gets powers

160. Linda and Barry

161. Manga So

167. Mom j'onn

168. Monophobia

174. Ot3

182. Plaything

197. Ship comic

199. Sin

202. Speed dancing

204. Starflash

205. Swan thawne

206. Symbolism

210. Touchy feely

214. What eo eats

216. Women

219. xxx

& anything else you're excited to share ☺️

Yeah I really should've seen this coming LOL

O o f

Hoooooo kay, strap in babes, it's gonna be a JOURNEY

Also FYI, I won't be showing sketches for every single one of these, either because I didn't draw much for them or the sketch is just too ugly to be shown publicly lol Without further ado, let's get into it!

7. Auction

Okay, so this is one part of a SUPER self indulgent concept of mine, one I'm honestly kinda shy just talking about it but the idea is, in the DC universe, I think we can all agree there's slave markets out there. And I feel like speedsters would be considered very valuable, on account they're some of the few beings who are attached to this ancient and powerful force, Barry and Eobard being especially prized due to the fact of Barry being the generator of the Speed Force and Eobard being the only known host of the Negative Speed Force in the entire universe.

So the plot is basically Barry and Eobard get captured somehow (insert convoluted explanation here) and is delivered to a slave market to be sold and become someone's trophy pets/slaves. This picture is the part in the story where Barry and Eobard get put on display for prospective buyers~

10. Bargain

This is a weird one but kinda like in the same vein of the last one, if there's a market for speedster slaves/pets, there's also a open market for any illegal, special "delicacy" meat. I think there would definitely be a belief among some races that by eating the flesh of a speedster, it would allow you to harness the Speed Force along with a host of other benefits.

11. Bard

Nothing to much to say on this one, this is really just a sketchdump I use for miscellaneous Eo practice drawings lol

This is one I particularly like~

14. Barry horse

I could've named this better but this is supposed to be Centaur Barry, because I love Barry and I love centaurs so naturally I had to make an AU for it. There's a whole series of pictures I would very much love to get to someday featuring Barry and the other Flashfam members as centaurs but I gotta learn how to draw horses first OTL

18. Barry Jesse

This is part of my unofficial Barry series where I draw him with a character I wish he had more screen time with, this time it's with one of his own family members, Jesse Quick! Barry and her never really had a relationship in the comics, the most we got to go off of was Jesse having a lot of respect for Barry but that's about it. In my AU, I thought it would be really fun if Barry and Jesse actually had a sort of brother-sister dynamic~

Barry is an only child and so I think it would be neat to see him have a sibling kind of dynamic with other peers of the Flashfam. Jesse would be older in my AU, more closer to how old she was in the Pre New 52 age because if she's too young, Barry would most likely just adopt her as another of his Flashlings lmao

24. Barry Superman 2

Once again with the lazy titles. I tend to reuse my old canvases so that kinda explains why I just add a number to them lol Anyway, this one is actually based on a Tumblr post I stumbled across ages ago about Clark and Barry losing their powers so they team up to investigate a case and stop bad guys using their respective skills as a forensic scientist and a investigative reporter (if y'all know who posted that, pls lemme know!!) And anyway, this was very much up my alley hah There's a handful of doodles I wanna do for this (because I can't ever just be satisfied with one drawing) where Barry and Clark navigate the hurdles of Being Human, being shot at by criminals, accidentally jumping out the window or smashing their face into doors because they keep forgetting they're depowered. It's a lot of fun to think about~

29. Battle of the fashion tastes

Silver Age Barry and Eobard duke it out, claiming they have the better fashion taste. Thad and Bart aren't impressed lol There's also a doodle about Barry showing up to Ralph's wedding in less than conventional wear. Ralph is speechless, to say the least xD

36. Cats

This is a crack doodle I did randomly one day. I'm honestly surprised DC hasn't made this joke yet cause it's really hilarious in hindsight

Poor Cheetah is so weirded out rn

37. Cheetah Yeeeaahhh, this is just Barry and Eo as cheetah furries. I like furries, sue me lol

39. Clark reading Cinderella

This is a silly little comic that's actually based on a cute and charming Golden Age/Silver Age Superman comic where Lois leaves her super bratty niece with Clark and he tries reading her the story of Cinderella only for him to immediately fall asleep and dream of becoming Cinderella's Fairy Godfather and throwing hands with her evil stepmother. It's great, I really recommend it (sadly I don't know the exact issue number, if anyone does, please drop me a line!)

40. Compromise

Eo tries to compromise with Barry: if he leaves Barry's family alone, Barry will let Eo do whatever he wants to him. Barry agrees. The ending is...unexpected aha. Here's a sneak peek of Eo's smug rat face tho~

42. Cover Flash

This is a redraw of that one really gay Flash cover because it haunts me in the corners of my mind What was the artist's mindset drawing it? Did Joshua Williamson come up with the idea? I feel like he had to. It's just so hilarious and gay, I can't- Anyway here's Barry's looking very disturbed about having his privacy invaded

45. Crackship doodles

This is one the sketchdumps for one of my absolute favorite DC ships of all time: EoIvy. It started out as a "haha that's a cute ship" to "they are infesting my brain, the roots are so deep right now and there's no hope for a cure" askdhsgkdb I have like, a million doodles ideas for them, I just need to organize myself, and also find an Ivy design I wanna use (no hate to the Injustice design, it's... alright. Tho I prefer her having green skin over human tones)

These are about Ivy showing Eo off like the bottom bitch he is to other people, mostly Gotham Rogues, to which no one approves of lol

They're not any where close to being done but have a mini Eo I drew in the corner~

53. DC Barry and Itty

This is a little comic I started from before I read a lot of comics. I heard that Hal had a partner/pet Itty and at the time I didn't know how Barry really acted or if he knew about Itty, so I had him being very unnerved by him. Itty is just happy to have another buddy xD

55. DC Barry's Obsession

Oh this is a cute one. Okay so, I don't know if you played or watched the game Lego Batman: Beyond Gotham (which by all rights should've been a Green Lantern game but that's another topic for another day) Anyway, long story short, the Justice League gets hit by all the different Lantern emotions, Barry in particular being hit by the Orange Lantern Greed beam. So now you have a speedster that's taking anything that isn't nailed down, from batarangs to buildings, much at the dismay of the other heroes. Thankfully, he's still pretty reasonable even in this greedy phase, just telling him "No" is enough to make him put the stuff back.

I wanted to play with this concept cause I thought it was funny and cute to see Barry in this different kind of light. I haven't come up with something solid yet but I want to get to it sometime~

56. DC Barry's Weird Fears

Okay so, this one is a crack/silly idea I wanted to do where Barry gets affected by Scarecrow's fear toxin or maybe the Yellow Lantern fear or whatever but anyway, Barry is forced to face one of his nightmares...which, as it turns out to Eobard's surprise, isn't about his family or loved ones, but something else entirely--food. Yeah xD

I won't tell you the punchline cause I still wanna draw it someday so I'll just leave you with what's probably the best Eo drawing I ever did lol

58. DC Dad Brawls

Idk if you're familiar with the Green Lantern CGI animated series but this pic is supposed to be Hal and Sinestro fighting over who has the best daughter (in the show Hal more or less adopted Aya lol)

59. DC Eo Styles

Actually what it says on the tin, for once ahah. This is me practicing drawing Eo in the DCAU style and also experimenting with a cartoony style of my own.

I like this result a lot but I feel like it's not as stylized as I was going for. Plus it also feels a little too close to other people's existing cartoony art styles. Tho I do love how Eo looks like some rich bad guy from a cartoon who eats shit at the end of the movie lmao

66. DC Hole In The Ground

Oh boy, this is a throwback LOL I drew this back when I was a baby Flash fan and I didn't know the characters very well at all, I didn't even really like Eobard at this point

Some context: this tales place in an AU where, idk maybe Barry somehow took all his rage, hate and pain away, but Eobard is now a mentally adjusted, normal man. The Flashfam tho, hasn't taken too well to him regardless. This is a short crack comic where the kids, Wallace, Wally/Bart and Avery?? Jesse?? Take Eo to a six feet deep hole in the ground cause they needed his help. Course it's all a ruse so when Eo gets close to the hole, they push him in and try to bury him.

Don't worry, Barry got Eo out, tho not without a disapproving expression as he asks the kids if they're proud of themselves. They are xD

73. DC Nobody Wants to Save Thawne

This is also part of the "Thawne is Redeemed" AU funnily enough. The concept is a twist on the classic "villain takes someone hostage" scenario where some bad guy speedster takes Thawne as a hostage, threatening to kill him, to which everyone cheers. Bewildered, the villain then goes "OR...I'll let him go, to which everyone screams "NO"

Yeah, even good Eo still isn't liked by anyone xD

76. DC Slade's New Pet

This is also based on comic canon. In the Flash New 52 comics, Evil Future Barry makes a throwaway remark that he was trained by Batman, Slade and Lady Shiva and I have since then been utterly captivated by this idea, and I waNNA FISTFIGHT DC, LIKE HOW ARE YOU GONNA MENTION HE WAS TRAINED BY THE WORLD'S BEST FIGHTERS AND THEN NOT EVEN SHOW A FLASHBACK DO YOU HATE ME DC??! AUGH

ANyway, my pic takes place during Barry's training with Slade and what that might look like, complete with a speedster whistle. Barry's pretty much Slade's pet speedster and he's not amused about it 😂

79. DC Speedsters and Bugs

A funny little comic where Wally tries to smack flies in the JL watchtower. It...does not end well lol

Rip, Batman

EDIT: Whoops! I just realized I called this Wally when Bruce says "Barry" here, MY BAD

I originally meant this to be Barry but then it was pointed out to me that it would be more in character for Wally to swat the bugs so I changed it aha

82. DC Bleached

This is just me crossing DC with my favorite anime/manga Bleach, specifically reimagining what my favorite character, Kenpachi, would be in the DC universe. I think he would definitely be in the Yellow Lantern Corps and picks fights with Sinestro and pretty much everyone around him and getting lost. It's basically just this:

83. DC Furries

More DC furries but also with Clark this time. I tried making him into a lion cause I feel like that fits him the most (that or a bear) It...didn't come out good lol

85. DC OC

Ayyy I get to infodump about my girl, WHOO

OK so, something to know about me is that I don't really tend to do the whole OC thing. Not that I don't love it cause I do! I love the idea of making up characters for media I'm in and seeing other people's fan characters is so fun and inspiring. The problem is, I'm just really bad at creating characters OTL

But for DC, my need for a alien speedster finally won out and I decided to just make them myself. She's still very much in the early brainstorming stages, sadly I also don't really have any art of her so far but I do have some ideas for her:

• I haven't figured out the details about her species but she's basically based on an octopus, tho I would like to take some more liberties with it. She definitely has tentacles because I especially wanted her to have those and bc she's octopi based, she also has a beak for snatching and eating prey. As for her gender, I imagine it's different for her species compared to ours, but in human terms the closest thing to what she is would be a woman. As for age, she'd be the equivalent of 40-50 years old.

• Her story so far is she has lived a relatively happy and peaceful life, successfully raising her young with her mate for many years. Eventually though, her offspring has grown up and left, her mate has either died or is off world somewhere (still workshopping this) For most of the time, she ends up alone. She struggles with Empty Nest Syndrome and tries to fill her lonely days the best she can. Until suddenly, one day, she's struck by a lightning bolt that comes down out of the sky. I think you can guess what happens next lol

• She gets superspeed and is rightfully terrified and disoriented as all hell. She has no idea what's happening and probably thinks she's either dying or cursed. It takes a long time for their Green Lantern to help her but eventually they do. Word gets back to Hal who knows just the guy to call. Cue Barry Allen.

• He meets up with and finally gives her some peace of mind and helps her accept her newfound powers. She's still very unsure but she takes to Barry a lot and forms a great relationship with him.

• Anyway, from here on it would be her going on to find her purpose in her new family of small bipedal aliens, aka the Flashfam and finally feel whole again.

• Maybe I'll have her teach other aliens about the Speed Force or smth idk, I'm still figuring things out • As for her powers, I really kinda wanted her to utilize the Speed Force differently than the other Flashes. I'm not sure what it would be but I'm sure I can come up with something

Keep in mind, some things may change but yeah, I like her a lot and I hope I can show her to you guys properly someday~

90. Deer Style

This is also based on the Silver Age, more specifically a panel of Barry carrying Eobard in a very odd way. It kinda looked like he was carrying him deer style so I'm using that as my excuse heheh

Honestly, I'm very tempted to draw a compilation of all the bizarre and often unsafe ways speedsters carry people in the old comics cause writers really got kinda wild LOL

91. Flash AU doodles

Okay so this is based on @longitudinalwaveme's AU of an someone else's AU where Kryptonians has invaded Earth and enslaved humanity, but instead of it being centered around Gotham, it's about everyone in Central/Keystone City. This one: https://longitudinalwaveme.tumblr.com/post/655662017135427584/another-weird-flashrogues-au

AUs like this really make the wheels in my head turn and I also just love a good ol' enslaving AU lmao Anyway, this was actually fanart for it, these being some What If doodles of Barry and Henry where Barry discovers he has powers as well as Eobard cause it made me really curious where he would fit in this AU, like what if he ran back in time to save Barry/stop the Kryptonians. Maybe the 25th century is still Kryptonian dominated but they have long since become more benevolent and restored a lot of humans' rights to live freely again. Maybe Kryptonian and humans live among each other. Idk, it's so intriguing to think about~

But yeah, go check the OP's blog and the original post cause it's super interesting and show them some love in general <3

97. Drunk Barry

This is an idea I had for Pre-powers Barry getting bomb ass drunk at like, a party or something. My personal headcanon is that he would definitely be a cross between the super sappy drunk and the weird drunk who info dumps about disturbing true facts lol

This is a another comic I def wanna get to eventually, it's very fluffy and tooth achingly sweet so I'm excited haha

100. EoHal

I'm gonna skip this one because I'm answering it in another ask~

101. Eo Medieval

This is one idea I had for how Eo could possibly be reinvented for Dark Knight Of Steel, that fantasy/Medieval Elseworld comic DC has going around.

While I'm very grateful the comic at least briefly mentions them and DOESN'T kill them off horribly (the standard for us Flash fans are so low OTL) I was very disappointed in how little we get of speedsters in this universe. Like, you could do SO MUCH with them, their lore allows a lot of room for some fun and cool reinterpretation but alas, I guess I'll have to do it myself

For this one, I wanted to play off the concept of Eobard being a teacher. I thought maybe he could be a Professor who's shrouded in mystery, a cryptic who holds the knowledge of future events that will unfold. He is almost always seen with his students, a group of misfit children he may or may not have saved from less desirable situations. His goals are unknown but he seems to delight in turning kingdoms against each other.

That's pretty much all I have for him. I also don't really know how Barry fits in this AU but I guess we'll see~

108. Eo Wants Commitment

A What If concept where Eo and Barry were partners before everything went south. Eo's proposing that since they worked together for awhile now, he and Barry should finally "tie the knot", ie becoming exclusive superhero partners to each other. Like a marriage but totally platonic, lol

111. Eobard Ivy doodles

More of my rare pair cause I'm very unwell about them At All Times. This time it features Eo's sexy tramp stamp on his ass, courtesy of Ivy, she gotta mark her property, after all~

115. EoBeth

OK so I'm pretty sure I'm one of like, two people on this whole site that cares about Beth Arden and wanna see her make a comeback in Flash lore.

Some context: Beth Arden is a one off character from Flash: United They Fall. She's a lieutenant of the Speed Force Resistance who wears the Shift armor, a specially designed suit to allow humans to be able to go up against a speedster (though she is still very much outclassed by Barry). She was a brief antagonist before turning around and helping Barry.

Her story goes that she was a pupil of Eobard's and loved him a lot (whether it's romantic or not is not clear but it seems to be the former) She helped him design the machine that would give Eobard his powers. Unfortunately when he used it on himself, he touched the Speed Force and was this driven insane and shortly afterwards he killed millions people instantaneously. He then became a tyrant who rules Central City through fear and drugging his citizens by making them crave Speed Force fixes, so they'll worship him.

Beth naturally decides the best way to deal with this is to travel back in time and kill Eo's idol, Flash (which...one, I love how home girl just immediately decided to kill her crush's hero, that's wild. Two, it's a little confusing why she chose to go back to 21st century and kill Barry instead of like.... preventing the creation of the machine that made Eobard go insane but, well maybe she figured that he would've found a way regardless idk) That doesn't work so she teams up him to take down Eobard. The whole comic is kinda an AU already honestly.

Anyways, I really liked Beth a lot and I think she has a lot of potential to be really interesting and compelling addition to the Flash mythos. She doesn't have to be Eo's love interest or anything, honestly I would love to see her maybe as a rival? Or still a pupil of his?? Idk, there's a lot of great ways to reincorporate her (tho I don't really trust modern writers to do her justice unfortunately)

116. Eo Carol

This is a pic inspired from a supervillain team up in the old comics where Eo interacted with Star Sapphire. Now, sadly the Star Sapphire in the story isn't Carol Ferris but instead a French woman who temporarily took up her mantle. Despite this, I became super fixated on the idea of Eo and Carol being partners cause like, it's just too perfect

Barry and Hal are a great friends, so why not also have some of their baddies also be buddy with each other? Make it come full circle aha

137. Gertrude

Okay, this is a random doodle of a really obscure character from Alan Scott's 1940 run. In it, Alan's friend Doiby had a sentient taxi car named Gertrude...Yeah. This isn't explained nor does Alan or Doiby act like this is bizarre or unusual in any way. I personally would enjoy seeing her make a comeback, but that's just me xD

138. GL Headaches

A compilation of sketches, one is based on that famous panel of Hal struggling to think and the other one is a random Green Lantern seeing Clark's spaceship speeding by and asking if they're supposed to do anything about that xD

139. GL Human Infestation

This is a comic I did where a young GL recruit asks Kilowog to ragale him about the time in GL history when the GL humans first came along.

This comic is supposed to take a funny jab at how freaking many human lanterns there are, ESPECIALLY for the one sector/planet. I mean, I definitely get it, Green Lanterns are popular and people want to see all the cool variations of human GLs but man, at this rate they're gonna need to make a sub Lantern group called the Human Green Lantern Corps fr lol

144. Hamlet

That one Silver Age comic where Barry does the entire Shakespeare play by himself, playing the roles of both the men and women rotates in my mind 24/7. Crossdresser Barry is real and canon, DC can't take it back <3

I definitely have a handful of doodles I wanna do with this, Barry in a dress is too good a concept to just narrow it down to one drawing. Iris is definitely gonna be involved 😏

150. Horse

This is part of the Centaur AU, this time it's Eo. I can't decide if I want him to be a centaur or a human in this AU cause I really love both ways, guess I'll just do both askdgskj

155. Iris Gets Powers

Okay, so this is an idea I had that's inspired from the Flash New 52 comic where Iris temporarily became a speedster. Basically, it's that but "What if Iris got powers but when she's already married to Barry and they have the whole Flashfam?" I thought that'd be SO interesting to see and I really wanna explore that

It'd be about her finally getting to see the world from Barry's and the others' perspective. To finally get to feel the humming buzz as the Speed Force courses through her veins and reach out and blur and blend into everyone else, to feel as one with the other speedsters, to finally be able to run with her family awahhh

Fair warning though, it does have a kinda bittersweet ending so be prepared~

160. Linda and Barry

I really wanted to draw these two together cause honestly, it is SO mind boggling that these two haven't???? Had a heart-to-heart conversation yet??? ESPECIALLY after Flashpoint. I personally felt robbed and so I've taken it upon myself to give them their moment in the spotlight they deserve. Barry is full of regrets and Linda, after some time to soul search and to think it through, forgives Barry and they hug <3

161. Manga Eo

Ok so, fun fact, did y'all know there's an official DC manga?? And that Eobard actually appears in it (not Barry for some strange reason) and fights Hal? Yeah, that's a thing that exists

I really liked his look here, even if it is very subtle, like the thick black outlines around his mask and so I wanted to try drawing him myself~

167. Mom J'onn

Remember that Batman Lego game I mentioned earlier? Yeah, this is based on that too lol

So in the game, everyone splits up to go to the Lantern planets bases, J'onn, Cyborg and Barry visiting the planet of Nok where the Indigo Lanterns are.

Barry is still in his super greedy phase and Cyborg has unfortunately been zapped by the yellow Lantern energy so now he's absolutely terrified of every little thing. J'onn was one of the few who wasn't hit by the Lantern beams so he's pretty much the only sane and capable one here. Mom J'onn refers to him basically having to keep Cyborg from freaking out and Barry from stealing everything under the sun while also simultaneously fight off the mind controlled Indigo Lanterns and restore their power battery. Send some prayers for J'onn cause he is Stressed lmao

168. Monophobia

Ahh yeah, ok this is based on Post New 52 Flash Rebirth where Barry definitely experiences this, especially the part at his birthday party where he is consumed with the fear of Eobard killing everyone he loves. This comic is Eobard exploiting that, isolating Barry and giving him a taste of his pain. It's basically Barry whump which I love and will definitely deliver more on in the future <3

174. OT3

Oops, I think I listed the wrong file. OT3 is one I'm already done with, I think I meant to write OT3 1. My bad! Anyway, OT3 1 is some more EoHarlIvy because a handful of people seemed to really enjoyed my art of them 😊 In this pic, Harley's dive-bombing Eo and Ivy, because she naturally can't let them have their moment alone together lol

182. Plaything

This was actually inspired by @ftl-faster-than-lifewonderful's fabulous art of putting Eo in a collar and that sparked the idea of like, Barry and Iris finally deciding they had Enough and just slapped a collar on this idiot in the hopes he'll finally calm down. It kinda ends up backfiring on them tho cause now he's absolutely insufferable about being their plaything lmao

197. Ship comic

This was part of an art trade thing also for @ftl-faster-than-life where they requested I draw Eobard x Amanda Waller (yes, *that* Amanda Waller) In a rare twist of events, she's the one who has his ass tied up and is definitely planning on doing some nefarious things to him hehe

There's actually a two page comic to go with this but I think I'll make that it's own post

199. Sin

I'm afraid I don't have much to say on this one but these are more drawings of Barry and Eobard during their time in the slaver's market~

202. Speed Dancing

Okay yeah, this one doesn't really have a reason behind it except I just wanted to draw Barry and Eobard in fancy suits and dancing with each other lol

204. Starflash

Remember that one old comic I mentioned earlier with Eobard and Star Sapphire? This was supposed to be a kind of panel redraw of their first interaction, where Eobard lays on the charm extra thick and bows to kiss her hand and introduces himself as Professor Zoom and stuff. IDK why, I just thought it'd be fun aha

Old art is old

205. Swan Thawne

I got this random idea from being on Chinese fanart sites and seeing Eobard's last name often being mistranslated as 'Swann'. Swans in real life are pretty, graceful and can be absolutely vicious, just like Eo so why not draw him as one? lol

206. Symbolism

This was a piece that was supposed to represent Barry and Eo's relationship. I don't fully know what the context would be but it'd something like if Barry or Eo went into the other's mind. Chains are involved 👌

210. Touchy Feely

This is just Eo being touched starved as hell aha For as strong and anti people Eobard is, I feel like if someone caressed him lovingly, he'd immediately shatter. It's a great concept I like playing with~

214. What Eo eats

A lil comic thing about what Eobard runs on since he never seems to eat

It's spite lmao

216. Women

Once again creatively titled. This one is yet another genderbend pic of mine that takes some inspiration from the old comics where Eo flirts with a apprehensive Dinah, much to Ollie's shock and disgust lol

219. xxx

Yet another pic for my self indulgent slavery AU, this time it's Barry and Eobard dressed up in cute skimpy slave outfits and collars <3

AND THAT'S THE LAST ONE /ded

MAMMA MIA ,what a undertaking that was akshdjakj

Thank you EXTREMELY much for your interest~!! <33 This was a beast and a half to tackle but I absolutely loved talking about my WIPs and I sincerely hope you enjoyed hearing them as well!! :)

As for ones I'm excited to talk about, there are definitely some I can think of but this post is already way, WAY too insanely long so I'mma cut it here~

#thanks for the ask~!#dc #dc comics #barry allen #eobard thawne #the flash #reverse flash #my art #LAWDY I think that was like the most I've ever sat down to write oughh #I need a cigarette or smth after that lmao #I really loved getting to talk about these tho cause knowing me it's gonna be like #YEARS before y'all get to see the final result #And I'm impatient LOL #I hope I didn't ramble on too much sorry it's a LOT #Heh

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