#I wanna **** ** just for good measure 👀👀

[twinkodium]

[CAR CRASH] [BUILDINGS FALLING] “GOOD GOD” [EXPLOSION] [BABY CRYING] "WAH" "WAA" [YELLING] “SHUT THAT DAMN BABY UP” [SIRENS] WEEE WOOO WEEE WOO [HELICOPTER AND NEWS TRUCKS] “WE’RE REPORTING LIVE FROM THE SCENE-“ [BANG] [LOUD COMMOTION] "MY LEG…MY LEG!!!"

GIGGLING KICKING MY FEET AND GRINNING LIKE AN IDIOT 😩

[r0-boat]

Hiii, I just noticed your blog and really impressed by your... spicy stuff 👀 Hope that you can accept this request hehe 👉👈 (oh and sorry for any grammar, English is not my first language 🥹)

I absolutely love your headcanons about demons in WHB is animalistic, so what if the kings (and Lucifer) have that time of the month where they completely act like an animal (biting, marking,...) and MC didn't know about that, so MC got tricked by the nobles and being lead (?) to the room where their kings are destroying everything because they cannot find their human (maybe the kings got tied down too or just be sealed inside the room).

Okay I really wanna know what will happen after that 👀 Hope that it will be spicy 😋 Thank you and have a great day ❤️

Demon Rut headcannons

Whb Demon Lords x Gn!reader

Nsfw

Cw: everyone's a slut, The demons are yours and they want you. Slight mentions of demons fucking other demons just to let off steam, demon gangbang.

You know that little private room that looks like it's in a club on the summoning screen? I think that's where their sessions take place, where they're all dressed up in nice for you, only to rip off their clothes seconds later and make a beeline to your body.

That room in that special club for elites only are reserved for the seven lords and you to be used as they please.

I totally think demons have rut, they can fuck and cum whenever they want but during that time of the month when the sexual appetite is heightened to a point where they can't even think clearly. The sense of smell and taste. They will use toys, their subordinates anything! to get them off but it's not enough they need you. From your time you've been in hell and from maternity waiting for you, they've been holding off, and now that you're here... And they can sense you, smell your sweet scent of human and sex they can no longer hold back.

Bold of you to assume that the Lords would share. Some of them wouldn't mind but Satan and Levi who are notoriously more possessive??

Perhaps if they just need you so much that they are willing to share you just to have you at the moment. Without help with potions or magic, You will not survive Even with just the five of them at once. I don't even think you'll survive Mammon with just him during rut.

At first, they'd hate the idea of sharing you, but after the first time. They would kind of like seeing you squirm on another demon's cock. Seeing you get ruined and covered in demon seed would be a sight to purged in their minds, something they would jerk to when you're not here. Something that they'll definitely start doing more often. Not only as a way to prove their worth to you but for their own pleasurable benefit of seeing you soaked with tears, cum, and your own juices. As well as bragging rights to the other lords the next time they see them.

Expect clashing of horns and claws and teeth because only a test of their strength can determine who gets the fuck you first. And using you to test their virality and stamina will determine who gets to keep you for their rut. These demons will go for hours, days until they are tired, until they throw in the towel to the other. They use how many times you come how many orgasms they could milk out of your human body as a dick-measuring contest. Even after bragging about how many times you squeezed their cock while cumming as a badge of pride as their subordinates look at them in awe.

"oh yeah? Well fuck you Satan because last rut I made them cum this many times."

*cue Satan lunging at them with their teeth and claws*

That teasing and play fighting is all in good fun because they know they share a similar interest in being excited to see you next time in another demon's lap, squirming for their touch. Cooing about how much you like their cock and how human cock isn't good enough for you, huh? How they're so lucky to have someone so hungry for demon cock, have delicious your juices taste, how cute you cry for them.

Maybe they'll even start asking you to wear little pretty Lacey lingerie so they can tear off or play with their tongues and teeth. Maybe there's subordinates will catch wind of their lords escapades with you. An excitedly wait for one day their Lord will ask them to come with them. They know that the Lord is in control, and they are just there to be your toy.

And after every rut session, you're treated like a literal princess with aftercare; why do you have to lift a finger. They know that they pushed you beyond your human limits. And they are eternally grateful You indulged their sinful desires and gave up their body to be used and destroyed.

This sex dungeon-like club also doubling as a little hotel room with a full bathroom with a huge pool of bathtub as well as another bedroom with a giant bed for sleeping or other sexual escapades if the Lord's desire. If they ever want alcohol, sex toys, or condoms, they will be brought to them in a care package like basket. And as well as to their dislike, a little locker for the human for other demons store their presents in. It's like you don't already have a permanent residence in hell with a mailbox chocked full of flowers and chocolates and anything you desire.

[sadhours]

gosh ok bestie I wonder when ur gonna hate me for always being here but I can’t help it.

imagine dom billy wakes up horny, and fucks you from behind as he’s spooning you-drilling his cock in and out chasing high. It’s so rough and you love it- you can’t help but moan so loudly to which billy grabs onto you and tells you to shut up because they’re not alone in the house. He’s just using you at this point for his relief. At one point you start crying because it feels so good and he’s all in your ear like -‘fuck. you’re crying?’ And somehow manages to go even faster moaning in your ear. Inspired by this below ☺️

I’m a lil embarrassed I didn’t even realize I had written that until like just now 👀 I was like ugh I love that who wrote that let’s credit them and then I reread it a couple times and I was like oh shit that was me 🙄

Anyways I love you! Here’s this :)

It’s the smell of your hair and skin that triggers it. His nose is shoved into the mess of as he spoons you from behind. Billy woke up maybe ten minutes ago, but he wasn’t really awake. He was drifting in and out, nuzzling against the crook of your neck when he inhales deeply. The sleepy scent of you is one of his favorites, right up there with the salty air at the beach. Usually, it’s a comforting smell as it tries to lure him back to sleep. But this morning, it makes his dick twitch and he actually feels a little feral, going in for another breath of it.

He gropes your hip while he rolls his against your ass. The sensation stirs you, a sweet hum coming from your throat as you turn to look up at him.

“Morning,” you purr, voice a tad scratchy with sleep and Billy thinks you sound so sexy.

“Mhm,” he kisses your jaw and grinds against you again, “Need you.”

His words go straight to your cunt, thighs tingling as you grow wet. It’s what’s so lovely about him; the way he makes you feel so desired. Never in your life have you felt so god damn good about yourself. Not until you met Billy.

“Take me, then,” you plead softly.

You ain’t gotta tell him twice. He moves his hand between your bodies, pushing his briefs to his ankles and kicking them off. Next, his hands pull your flimsy tank top over your breasts and he gives them a squeeze for good measure. Can’t help himself, really. Finds himself grabbing you whenever he gets the urge. He loves the way you act embarrassed about it in public but your body always melts into it, enjoying it just as much as he does. Billy makes quick work of your panties and then grabs your thigh, angling your leg up so you’re open for him.

He smoothes his hand over your ass before rubbing his fingers against your leaking hole. A devious chuckle bordering on a moan leaves his lips as he soaks his fingers in your slick.

“Such an eager slut for me,” he purrs.

Before you can reply, he’s shoving his cock inside your pussy. A low groan escapes him and you let out a little squeal. Billy pounds into you relentlessly, rough and quick thrusts that force your eyes wide before they’re rolling back in your head. It’s an otherworldly bliss. You swear his cock was made just specifically for you; it reaches exactly how deep you need and the slight curve of it angles his tip perfectly against your g-spot. In fact, Billy’s the only person who’s ever made you climax from penetration alone. You seriously didn’t even know it was possible.

His fingernails dig into the skin of your hip as he jackrabbits into you. Your body jerks back and forth with his movements and the bed springs squeak rhythmically. He’s so rough, his face scrunches up in pleasure as he grunts with it. Billy’s pretty damn pornographic and it only makes your cunt that much more soaked, you can hear the squelch of it but it’s more arousing than disgusting. Just evidence of how carnally you want him. Billy’s hips snap against you even harder and you can’t help the loud moan erupting from you.

He grabs hold of your face and looks down at you, “Shut the fuck up. You wanna wake everyone up with that little whore mouth of yours?”

You almost want to say yes, it feels so fucking good you don’t care who hears and a part of you wants everyone to know what he can do to you. But, more than anything to want to please this man, want to be the best good girl for him so you bite your lip and try to keep it down. It’s a struggle though, the drag of his thick length against your clenching walls is excruciatingly delicious. Billy fucks you dumb, drool pooling at the corner of your lips as you meet his gaze with big, shiny eyes.

The position is a little strenuous, you’re almost on your stomach but your neck is craned up to look at him. But you don’t dare complain, can’t fathom him stopping for even a second to throw into whatever position he wants. The sound of skin slapping together is loud, he’s really fucking into you at breakneck speed. Billy’s essentially using you for his release at this point, pushing you hard into the mattress but you wouldn’t have it any other way. You’re more than happy to be his little fuck toy, a vessel for his pleasure. It’s so demanding yet satisfying that tears begin leaking from your eyes.

“Fuck,” he groans lowly, still holding onto your jaw, “you’re crying.”

It excites him, spurs him even further and he lowers his face down to yours. His thrusts accelerate, force even harder as he drills into your aching cunt. You can’t hold it in any longer, you let out a sob while he moans into your ear.

“Billy! Billy, Billy!” you cry out, whining and moaning. You’re clenching around his cock, it’s too much but too amazing to stop. You need this like you need air.

“Such a good girl,” he praises, moving his hand to grab at your tits. “Feels so good your crying, huh baby?”

“So fucking good,” you whine out, “Billy… gonna cum.”

He groans lowly, “Cum for me, baby. Be a good girl. Give me what I want.”

You spasm around his cock, urged by his words, by the permission. It rips another sob from you, then a slew of loud moans, surely waking your roommates.

“Fuck, fuck,” he whimpers, pushing you fully into your stomach while he thrusts in and out you faster, the slick from your orgasm making it easier. He cums inside you with a guttural moan, collapsing his weight on to your back while he pants in your ear. You can’t imagine a better way to wake up.

[iguana-eyanna]

To Be Something More

Pairing: Shayne Topp x fem!reader

Summary: This isn't your regular movie night with Shayne.

Requested by @winifrede . This was fun to write!

"Pride and Prejudice?"

"No, watched that with Jackie."

"Mr. and Mrs. Smiths?"

"Really?"

"Hey, it's still a good movie."

"Yeah, from old fossils like you"

Shayne gasped dramatically as he grabbed his chest.

"That is just hurtful and you know that."

"Oh please, nothing can penetrate those muscles you have." You said, popping some popcorn in your mouth.

It was your annual movie night with Shayne at your place. (You tease how he has such a small place for a big man and he blushes at times when you call him that.) Now as you scrolled down Netflix, it seemed as if you went through the entire collection of films.

You suddenly get a ping off your phone and you look down at it, chuckling.

"What?" Shayne asks, curiously.

"Ah it's nothing."

"C'mon, I wanna see." Shayne whined.

"Dude, get a grip." You said, pulling your phone away from his view.

Not even a millisecond, Shayne jumped on top of you, trying to reach your phone as he tickled your waist.

"What - the - hell?" You gasped, laughing uncontrollably, feeling as you're losing the gip on your phone.

Shayne finally reached out and finally caught it, staring at your screen.

"Now let's see why you're so secretive."

He inspects and sees that it's a video on YouTube, but specifically a video they just published online for Smosh. Shayne and Damien were supposed to shoot a cooking video and have the Mythical Kitchen Chefs test your food.

Damien got a cold, so you filled in as Shayne's competition. The entire video was just you bickering back and forth about who made better cookies.

"How was filming with the Try Guys baking competitions compared to this?" Shayne asked Josh who was off camera. "Actually, pretty chaotic here than their studio." You laugh as you knead your dough. "Yeah, you viewers are lucky you don't have to be fed up with this guy. When Shayne and I bake, he's so technical with the measurements, that he bought a food scale for my birthday." You said. "So we can both use it!" Shayne yelled out. Shayne looks at the camera, pausing his mixing. "If you saw how she bakes at home, you'd understand my frustration. Look at her now!" Your side of the kitchen was messier compared to Shayne's, making you frustrated. "You know, when the judges eat mine, it'll taste like love. Yours will taste like stale protein shakes." You said as he was also using that as an ingredient. "Oh yeah? Why don't you come over here and prove it." He said, taking a spoon of peanut butter and trying to flick it in your bowl. "No means don’t even try." You said as Shayne tried to sabotage your recipe. "It looks like you could use more - flour." Shayne said, throwing a fistful of all-purpose flour all over your arm. "That's it. No more playing nice." You replied, throwing some marshmallows at him as he tried deflecting it. You two went at it for a couple of minutes till Shayne lifted you in the air and threw you on his shoulder. Both of you were in hysterics.

The editing team had to reduce the food fight to manage the video better, but the full fight was posted later, gaining more traction with viewers. Shayne and you gained a good amount of new followers the following day.

Shayne scrolled down and saw the comments, knitting his eyebrows.

is it me or - no, no one sees this but me? okay 👀

I will go FERRAL if this is platonic because that's just robbing us 😤🫠

I want Shayne to lift me in the air like that 😭🥵

"These comments are very..."

"Colorful? You should see the fan edits."

"You've watched them?" Shayne said looking down at you.

"Yeah, they've been all over my fyp on TikTok."

Shayne chuckles as you later joined in the laughter till it dies.

"Hey, Shayne?"

"Yeah?"

"You're still on top of me."

"Oh, sorry." He quickly said, sitting up.

You shimmy upward and stole your phone back from him.

"C'mon, I think it's more entertaining to watch these compared to whatever's on TV."

So all night, you and Shayne were comparing fan edits on your couch.

"Here, look at this one." Shayne said, lifting his phone to your face. It was the infamous Keanu Reeves TikTok where he's crying while sipping wine and wearing headphones. The caption read 'give up all your money or have Shayne & you as canon'

"Nope, mine's better." You said, showing Shayne a compilation of you two titled 'Shayne Topp Shooting His Shot.'

"Wow, they said I tried flirting with you 39 times?" Shayne asked.

"That's only from this month's videos." You said.

"Well, you're also flirting back at me." He said, knowing he's just getting under your skin

"Please, you’re the one always stirring the pot.” You said, leaning forward to him as you crossed your arms

“Oh I’ll show you pot stirring” Shayne said in a matter a fact voice, inching closer to your face. You flutter your eyes as his direct his gaze to your lips. And in a moment, Shayne found his hands back to your waist as he kissed you.

Your face began to heat up and your thoughts became haywired. But all you could do is deepen the kiss as you tangled your fingers through his hair. Soon enough, you found yourself climbing on top of his lap as you didn't draw a breath till you pulled away.

You two stare at each other in bewilderment.

"Wow" Shayne whispered.

"You know, you're not as bad of a kisser as I thought you'd be."

"You thought of us kissing?" He asks, softly.

"From time to time. How about you?" You said, not knowing his true feelings.

"I um, I think about us... a lot."

"Really?" Your heart skipped a beat.

"Yeah I mean, you make me laugh the most when we shoot videos and when you're the only one who actually listens to my workout regime-"

"I know how much you like to brag," You said, playfully rolling your eyes.

"-but you take the time to listen. And when we hang out like this, I wouldn't trade it for anything else."

You slowly wrap your hands behind his neck as you look at him lovingly.

"So, what are we going to do now?"

"I want us to be something more if you want to."

You nod your head softly as you place your hand on his cheek.

"Wouldn't have anyone else, Shayne."

Shayne gives a breath of release and smiles at you, beaming with so much joy. You two kiss again, later connecting your foreheads together feeling this fluttering sensations you never felt before.

Later, you find yourself in Shayne's arms as you cuddle under a blanket as you watch 10 Things I Hate About You, as you finally get to end your movie night right.

In more ways than you can imagine.

[majimasleftasscheek]

Honestly if it’s ok I would like to hear your thoughts on Kazumi? I’m having brain rot at the idea of Kiryu being a drag queen or gender-fluid and there’s like no one talking about it and I just wanted to know how you’d picture it because your goromi headcanon is just so well thought out- if this is a weird question or a hard one to answer I’m sorry it’s my first time doing this-

no worries, I LOVE talking about good shit like this 👀

SO KAZUMI

I don't particularly see her as genderfluid like I do Goromi but!! I do see her as a drag identity, just not as bold as the former.

Kazumi in a sense is very much how I interpret Goromi - that being she's pretty much the same dude but now in a wig but with a few changes.

she'd for sure have a Kiryu-esque seriousness to dressing up as in treating it like some kind of mission than a more casual thing. she'd have to be reminded like yo this ain't a substory, you can put your lipstick on without the concentration of someone fighting for their life.

in a way being Kazumi is a sort of break for Kiryu. he HAS to chill out and it's rough at first but eventually he's like okay, this is okay, I can just be

she's even more quiet and reserved than Kiryu already is, preferring to be left alone. it's a mix of not exactly knowing how to feel in drag and general internalized embarrassment so she's not up to being social about it. there's certainly an uncharacteristic lack of confidence on her part and needs a bit of encouragement to really feel like she isn't looking ridiculous.

Kiryu seems like, a by the book type of guy, due to his upbringing and general way he carries himself, so putting on drag is very alien to him. like, he can certainly see other people doing it. but himself? wild. that said, he's bold and fairly immune to what people think of him but something about being Kazumi, for a good chunk of time, is very intimate, especially if he's around people he knows.

when she's with people she trusts, that's when she starts having a good time, maybe even being a lil bombastic then immediately covering her mouth when she laughs too loud. but if her present company comforts her, she'll be happy to let slip a more excitable version of herself. it helps knowing that, for the time, she's just someone else and that someone else can do whatever the fuck they want. it's even better that few people would recognize her, let alone even think a guy like Kiryu is Kazumi at first glance.

Kazumi is a bit of a tease, a bit more sensual. not flagrantly obvious but it's there, with the way she sways her hips and looks at you with those beautiful eyes™ that say everything and anything you wanna hear. Kiryu's a very reactive type of guy, doing this and that because of something else. Kazumi however takes the initiative in little ways as a measure of testing her own waters, as to do something Kiryu probably wouldn't unless provoked. Kazumi has no goals, she lives in the moment and wants to enjoy it on her own terms.

dresses in colors very much like her usual suit (red, gray, white). will be super self conscious about her ass hanging out in short dresses and if you come at her with the 'but you don't mind if you're wearing a fundoshi?' and you can literally see the gears turning in her head.

not super great at fighting in heels (compared to Goromi) so she's not pulling crazy moves or running around. she prefers beast mode and the graceful art of blunt force trauma to play keep-away

KAZUMAJI TIME I'm unwell

so the way Kiryu interacts with Goromi is SO important to me and it's equally just as important for my thoughts on Kazumi so you'll see a lot of parallels here.

Majima is MAD horny for Kazumi it's unreal. impressively brainrotted even by goblin standards. partly because it's very exciting to see Kiryu prettied up and partly because he can just see the ✨ gender ✨ radiating off of Kazumi even if it's not as much of a gender thing for her as it is for Majima. he gets that chest tight sort of happy seeing Kiryu try something so important to him.

definitely shows his love via gift giving and physical affection. Kazumi's not big on gifts in general because it's embarrassing so she has to often convince him to just take her out for a good time and that's fine enough. for her, the affection is more important than anything and she'll admit, she likes to be wooed

I have to include Haruka cuz how can I not 🥺 she definitely helps out with makeup and hair. it's not perfect but she's the only person Kazumi will not squirm around for. Kazumi will sit still a little for Majima/Goromi to help out but she's gonna complain about it the whole time.

every minute Majima's not hanging onto Kazumi like she's his trophy wife is another minute he dies inside. he makes it an event to let everyone know he's got the hottest girl in town and it makes Kazumi feel pretty damn good.

Kiryu knows he's hot as hell so that extends to Kazumi as well—small crowds preferably though. despite enjoying a bit of attention, she still prefers plenty of alone time. there is significant anxiety for her to be the center of attention either because someone might recognize her or because things going to shit is just how Kiryu's life tends to go.

she lovesss getting a rise out of Majima, especially if they're in a place he has to behave. since he's her biggest fan, she does like a good bit of ordering him around, often to the point he's actually irritated but that's just part of the game for them, being smug heathens @ each other. I'm a goblin for possessiveness and jealously so throw in a bit of that for flavor 😏

I have a Kazumi x Majima fic where she's very dommy mommy and he's a meek lil worm and I think that's a sign of nature healing.

BIG fluffy Goromi interactions, they're very affectionate together and Goromi's just so giddy to have Kazumi go out with her. she will however bite people's fingers if they so much as wave in Kazumi's direction. the excitement from Goromi does help stave off Kazumi's own insecurities.

being with Goromi does give Kazumi a bit of perspective she otherwise wouldn't really understand as Kiryu. I can see her having one of her typical "wow, people sure do live differently than I do and I've gained more respect for such things" sorta deal lol. basic stuff but significant to those around her.

[ckret2]

👀 I want to hear more about this Bill AU

You were the very first person to send me an ask about the Bill AU, and it was an open-ended question, so I've been saving your ask special for... a fanfic. IDK how often or how much I'm gonna write actual full fic for this AU but for now, here: the first half of Bill's reunion with the Pines family. (Attempted murder included.)

####

February 25, 2013

The vengeful demon standing in the door of the Mystery Shack possessed only four items in the universe:

Two safety pins.

A time tape tied around his waist like a belt.

And a tunic he'd fashioned himself in the style of an ancient Greek Ionic chiton, folded and pinned so perfectly that the wearer must have seen them thousands of years ago when they were at the height of fashion.

Soos couldn't identify an authentic Ionic chiton. All he could tell was that the lady at the door was wearing a toga made out of a bright purple Pony Heist children's bedsheet.

Soos laughed, flashing the tourist a double thumbs up. "Hey! Awesome toga. That should really be like a thing. Imagine if we all wore togas. We could just wake up, roll our bedsheets around us like a burrito, and go out!"

Distractedly, the tourist answered, "Careful, you can't tell when Big Fashion is listening in." 

"Haha. Who?"

The tourist didn't reply, and she hadn't looked at Soos once; instead, her gaze was darting around the shop searchingly.

"Are you shopping for something specific?" Soos asked with his best customer service voice. "Post cards? Snow globes? Weird taxidermy thingamajigs? Pants?"

"Where are the Pines?" the tourist asked, casting a sharp look at the "employees only" door, then the vending machine.

"Oh, Mr. Pines! The original Mr. Mystery! Heh—he actually retired a few months ago. The Mystery Shack's under new management!" Soos planted his fists on his hips and puffed up his chest. "It's me, I'm the new management."

"But where are they?" the tourist pressed.

"Uhh, he and his bro are somewhere in South America, I think? Some place called... Redacted. But hey, if you really wanna meet him in person, in his last letter he said they might visit for like spring break if the kids can make it up. First week in April!"

"First week in April," the tourist muttered, glancing away from Soos, thoughtfully fiddling with the time tape wrapped around her waist.

"Oh, dude! I've tried to use a tape measure as a belt too! Haha! It worked great, until I bumped the button and it retracted. Yeesh. Hey, do you want a fur belt? We sell fur belts now." Soos turned away, rummaging through the new display next to the t-shirts. "They're all ethically sourced from recycled materials! I bought a bunch of old rugs from the Northwest Mansion to slice up."

Soos grabbed up a fuzzy pink belt. "Check it, I think this is unicorn hide or something. Bet it'd go so good with that Pony Heist toga..."

The tourist had vanished in thin air.

Soos looked around. "Huh." He stuck the belt on a shelf beneath the cash register, in case she decided she wanted it later.

Once all the other visitors had left for the day, and Soos was left alone to clean up, he glanced around the shop nervously. "Is anyone there?" He lifted his broom like a samurai sword. "Hello? Big Fashion?"

Nothing answered. He shrugged and kept sweeping.

###

April 1, 2013

A vengeful demon who possessed nothing but two safety pins, a time tape belt, and a purple Pony Heist bedsheet tunic stood in the center of the Mystery Shack gift shop.

Which was weird, because Soos hadn't heard the door and she totally hadn't been there a moment ago.

"Oh hey! Toga Lady!" Soos turned to Wendy, who was picking up a few bucks as a temp worker handing the spring break tourists. "It's Toga Lady. She came in like a month ago. The toga's cool, right? I think it's cool."

Wendy glanced up, choked back a laugh, and scrambled to grab her phone for a picture.

"So, where are the Pines?" Toga Lady asked, with an edge of impatience.

"Oh, dude, did you come all they way back here to meet them? I'm sorry, the Mr. Pineses didn't make it. They couldn't get a flight out of Atlanta." Soos stopped, frowned, and pulled a water-stained letter from his pocket to double check. "Sorry, Atlantis. Something about a siege of sirens?"

"They would pick now to invade," Toga Lady muttered. "I suppose the children aren't here."

How did she know about the children? Maybe she'd visited last summer and remembered them? Like, early summer, before Pony Heist came out. Soos would have remembered the toga. "Naw, heh. They went to Roswell."

"Oh, cool," Wendy said distractedly, busy texting Toga Lady to everyone she knew. "Checking out the competition."

"Yeah, Dipper's sending me like a billion pictures of the alien museum."

"Well," Toga Lady snapped, "when are they showing up?"

Soos was beginning to get the impression that Toga Lady was less an admiring fan, and more one of those customers. All the same, he said, "June first, for sure. That's when the kids get here for summer break so the Mr. Pineses are coming too. Definitely. Promise."

She rolled her eyes—one of them twitched, like she'd gotten something in it and was struggling to keep it open—but said, "All right, fine! June. What's the difference?" She trudged to the door and leaned next to it by the snow globe shelves, fiddling with her belt, as if she was settling in to wait right there for the next two months.

Soos frowned—she might drive off tourists, blocking the door like that—but said, "Oh! While you're here, I thought you might be interested in this belt." He reached past Wendy to grab it from beneath the cash register. "I didn't get a chance to show you last time before—"

He looked toward the door. She was gone. "Huh. Did you see Toga Lady leave?"

Wendy shrugged. "Wasn't looking."

"Huh." Soos replaced the belt. At least he knew when he'd see her next.

###

June 1, 2013

"What's with the belt?" Stan asked.

"Oh! It's for a regular." Soos pointed with both hands down at the fuzzy pink belt peeking beneath his suit jacket. "I think she's comin' today. She wanted to meet the original Mr. Mystery."

"Hey, an admirer!" Stan mysteriously grew two inches as his posture spontaneously improved. "Is she cute?"

"Uh... if you like bedsheet togas?"

"Ooh, a party girl."

Over by the shop's glass display case, Ford said, "These are new," and lifted a jar with an alien fetus suspended in green goo.

"Oh, yeah!" Soos said. "Dipper sent me like, a billion keychains of these little alien guys from Roswell. So I started filling Abuelita's empty spice jars with aliens and lime jello. Cool, huh? It looks like we stole them from a secret government lab or something."

Stan laughed, slinging an arm around Soos. "Listen to this! Brilliant! I knew I put the right guy in charge."

Soos grinned goofily. "Aw, gee, Mr. Pines..." A flash of purple caught the corner of his eye. Toga Lady was leaning next to the door by the snow globe shelves, fiddling with her belt.

Here was a chance to show off his great business instincts with Stan watching. Time to make a sale. "Oh, hey, Toga Lady! I didn't hear you come in! Still rockin' Pony Heist, huh? Hey, I've been trying to show you this belt I think you'll like..."

But she wasn't listening to him. Her gaze was fixed on the Pines twins' backs. As Soos watched, her expression darkened, and her grin widened.

The vengeful demon reached past the snow globes, snatched up a heavy "mysterious green crystal cluster ($250)" made of glued-together broken glass, and heaved it up over his head. "Hey, Sixer!" Face contorted in a snarl of a smile, he turned the cluster over, sharp broken shards pointing downward. "Welcome home!"

Bill Cipher swung the glass weight down toward Ford's head.

(If you wanna keep reading, all chapters are right here!)

[lees-chaotic-brain]

#2 bubblegum 👀

Wanna Go Get Some Coffee? (Yuji x Reader)

CW: slight mentions of past bullying and insecurity, fluff, yuji is a green flag, very light swearing

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The first time you met Itadori, the two of you were in middle school.

Back then, you had a giant crush on him.

You were quiet, and a little nerdy, so the majority of your peers often ignored you, or made fun of you.

But Itadori Yuji, handsome, popular, good at all sports Itadori Yuji was never anything but sweet to you.

It didn't really make sense to you at first. Why did he always say hi to you in the halls? Why did he help you carry your stuff, even though you insisted you were fine and there were hordes of other girls that would kill for him to carry their stuff? Why did he go out of his way to include you in conversations?

Why was he so nice to you? You doubted it was for your looks. You wouldn't go as far as to say that you were ugly, but back in middle school you hadn't fully grown into your features, which led to some unkind comments from your classmates.

Either way, this was a long time ago.

Years passed, and you grew into your features, accepted that you were a little weird in a good way, embraced your oddities, and became more confident.

With your newfound confidence, came new friends, and soon you had a group of friends who shared your interests and cared deeply about you.

You had also gone on a few dates, but none of them had measured up to your middle school love, as childish as that sounded.

And now, on your eighteenth birthday, you wondered how he was doing as you followed the red thread that had appeared around your wrist that morning.

Hopefully your soulmate would be as sweet, caring, and good-looking as Itadori was...

Suddenly the thread around your wrist went wild, waving around and thrashing.

Oh crap, your soulmate was getting close.

Hurriedly you fixed your hair and adjusted your clothes before walking a little faster, eager to meet your soulmate.

Rounding a corner, you collided with someone sprinting in the other direction.

The two of you smacked foreheads, and you staggered back with a little groan, clutching your face.

From your peripheral you could see the ribbon was pulled taut, the other end wrapped around the wrist of the person you ran into. Well okay. This was not how you were expecting to meet your soulmate.

"FOUND YOU! Oh crap, wait are you okay? Shoot. Let me see."

Gentle hands grabbed your wrist, and pulled your hand away from your face. Looking up, you made eye contact with your soulmate for the first time.

"Name??"

"Itadori?!"

The two of you blurted at the same time, shocked.

You let out a sigh of relief.

"Oh thank god, I was really hoping he would be like you, but for you to be my soulmate, that's even better than I hoped-"

Mortified you slapped your hands across your mouth.

What were you saying?! You practically just confessed to him seconds after meeting him again. You had to get it together.

"Um-well, what I meant was-"

"You were hoping your soulmate would be like me?"

Itadori's face was practically glowing he was beaming so hard.

"Um-I"

You stammered, unsure how to answer.

"I was really hoping you would be my soulmate too!"

He said a little shyly, his blinding grin still present.

"I mean, well, after I didn't learn my trait on my birthday, I knew my soulmate was younger than me, so that didn't rule you out, and then I knew it was your birthday today, so when the string appeared I got a little excited. Um, that's why I was running. Sorry for bumping into you. Are you sure you're okay?"

"You-You were hoping that I would be your soulmate?"

You repeated, still a little dumbfounded.

"Y-Yeah...is that a problem?"

Worry crept into his voice.

"NO! No."

You tried again, softer the second time.

"I'm just surprised that you hoped it was me of all people. It-It actually makes me really happy that you were hoping I was your soulmate."

Looking over at him, you noticed that he was just staring at you blankly.

"Itadori? Earth to Itadori. Are you there?"

"We're gonna get married, right?"

Itadori blurted, starting.

You blushed.

"...What?"

"Sorry! I was just thinking, and I-I'm sorry!"

He panicked, bowing.

You laughed.

"I'll forgive you on one condition: you let me call you Yuji, okay?"

"O-okay."

He said, turning pink.

"Can I-Can I call you by your first name too then?"

"Sure."

You planted you hands on you hips and gave him a once over.

"Say, wanna go get some coffee?"

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

Yuji is the greenest flag. I love writing for him so much.

Thanks for requesting! This event is still open for anyone interested!

<3 Lee

[starbase-yorktown]

For the wip title ask game: how to live with living forever/ruin (of bitten lips and broken hands) 👀👀👀

I would also love to hear about your oc novels, so whichever you want to talk about is good!

💗💗💗

*cracks knuckles* let's go @zzoomacroom, you asked for three WIP updates and you're getting three WIP updates. Answer Part 1.

ruin (of bitten lips and broken hands): sequel to my centennial husband big bang fic nothing grows in corpses (in the earth of me) which you can either read there or read more about here first. The overarching series is titled how to live with living forever. But where NGIC is about Morpheus' unwillingly resurrection and him coming to terms with living after months of a gruesome existence strike, "ruin (of bitten lips and broken hands)" is about him learning to come to terms with his flaws and the ways he hurts others, about learning how to be a better man under the straining tutelage of Hob Gadling (and his gf Gwen who SERIOUSLY deserves better, RUN, BABY GIRL, RUN). Here there be murderous breakups, toxic codependent relationships, Linda Martin of CW's Lucifer tragically getting roped into this shit show to help folks learn accountability and healthy coping strategies, and all-in-all a Dreamling endgame where both men have to take a long, hard look at themselves and do some growing up and healing before they can truly reach for each other.

+++

That night, Hob drifted in that in-between of sleep and wakefulness until he became suddenly very acutely aware of someone crouched at his bedside. Someone with wild, gravity-defying, technicolor hair was bowed all close to him, peering into his face almost nose-to-nose with those unblinking eyes—

“Jesus fuck!” he shouted and startled into full-blown wakefulness in the same shaft of fear.

“I dunno if Jesus fucked,” Delirium frowned, suddenly enamored with this line of thought. “He was really very busy, busy like the bees and the birds and—”

Hob turned wildly to Gwen for some measure of assistance—a twitch, a snore, he'd take anything—only to find her somehow still sound asleep despite the chaos unfolding not an arm's length away. He'd worry about that unnatural slumber next, he decided, and twisted back to Delirium, nearly grabbing her by the arm as he hissed his demand.

“What are you doing here?”

She blinked at him like some kind of eerie clockwork doll, her head turning this way and that in kind. “WatcHInG yOu sLeEp” she said, and her voice layered and echoed and distorted in a way that made Hob’s blood run cold. The strength in his voice turned to rubber.

“Wh-w-why?”

“He likes you," she said as though it were obvious. "He doesn’t like a lot of people. Doesn’t like me all the time. I wanna see what’s inside you that makes him like you.”

Hob swallowed.

Are you there, God? It's me, Robert Gadling.

“……..A-And?”

The girl shrugged. “Dunno.”

And before Hob could figure out how to protest, spluttering and moving to scramble clear up the headboard far too late, Delirium climbed into bed with him, straddling his belly and settling atop him with a weight like an elephant despite her willowy, tiny frame. His hands held at his shoulders, afraid to touch her anymore than he already was, and he casted about for something, anything to help him out of this predicament without having to shout for Morpheus or Gwen.

And then her hands were touching him, gripping his sides, her fingers slotting into the cage of his ribs, and he tried to jump clear out of his bones with a nervous, uncomfortable laugh. “Fuck—”

“You like that word.”

“S-sorry,” he stammered as he watched her poke and prod, watched her play with the carpet of hair on his chest with all the curiosity of a child, watched her reach for his head and lift the strands of his hair. She combed her fingers through it, just to see what it felt like, and tracked the form of his muscles and bones from his shoulders to his arms down to his hands with a firm, probing grip. She sniffed at his scalp, his neck; something warm and wet dashed across his skin, and she pulled back, running her tongue along the top of her mouth with a perplexed expression as if pondering the very taste of him for an answer to her question. Hob’s stomach turned. “Just. Just a bit uncomfortable.”

She looked sharply into his eyes, seizing on his words as if they held the answers she sought. She picked up his hands, feeling every finger, every callous, bending his joints through their ranges of motion.

“Why?”

“Hey, um.” He took the risk and closed his hands on hers, trying to hold her still, “D-Delirium, was it?”

“MMhmm,” she frowned, trying to extricate her hands and continue her so very important study.

“Look, I-I’d love to help you understand your brother, but this is really not appropriate. You should come back in the morning like Morpheus said.” She had been stilling as he spoke, staring at his hands on hers, and a light bulb went off in his head: a way out, a way to distract her. “Wh-where’s your dog? He’s probably real worried about you—”

“He’s with the fishies,” she mumbled.

Hob gulped.

“A-as in dead o-or—”

“No, sleeping! Don’t be silly, it’s sleeping with the fishies, not drowned with the fishies or chopped up with the fishies or run over with the fishies—” She had been fighting to pull her hands free again, frowning all the more deeply even as her voice lilted and twirled, and Hob gripped her a bit tighter despite his better judgement.

“Delirium.” She stopped. She stared into his eyes this time, and he felt the world begin to get a bit fuzzy at the edges, felt gravity begin to tip. “Go home, lamb. Or g-go back to where Barnabas is sleeping, I’m sure he needs someone to look out for him while he rests. Right? You can come back in the mornin’. Promise.”

Her hands relaxed in his. And he cautiously let her go, seeing a wavering in her expression and body language that led him to think she was finally going to sulk away. What he did not anticipate was for her to draw her arms to her chest, like a child hiding away within herself, and then for her to pitch forward with rising shoulders and a doming back until she was pressed to his chest like a loafing cat or a scared toddler.

For a moment, she just laid there.

Then, she began to shake; her breaths began to tremble, and icy-hot tears seared his skin as she began to weep….

This fucking family. Jesus fucking Christ.

[hoonieshoney]

Summaries for these are in my WIP ❤️

Also hi, hello, there’s so many of you here since I posted the Heeseung fic 🥹

Welcome! I’m happy to have you here and I appreciate all the love you’ve been giving me and my stories ❤️

I know I have it plastered all over this blog but just for good measure, please be mindful this is a dark content based blog. I know some stuff I have like my drabbles and hard thoughts are pretty tame but as this blog progresses even more it’s going to be around 80% dark content focused. Just want to make all you new ducklings aware! If that’s not your cup of tea, I totally understand. I hope you still wanna stay and enjoy the tame stuff that will be around (just not as much)

Enjoy your day! Don’t forget to eat and stay hydrated! I appreciate every single one of you!❤️

[myers-meadow]

*moonwalks in*

sup fellow simps, anyone wanna talk about how Otis 100% has a corruption kink, and would go feral over being the only one to truly ruin you in the best way possible??

especially if your a virgin?.? Like??? Cmon?

No?

ok I’ll leave—

You're so right 🥴 This is one of my favourites sides of him ^^

Even if you're not a virgin, any experience you had previously is not gonna measure up to him anyway - according to him that is. He likes molding you to how he prefers you. Imagine him guiding you through giving him head 🥴🥵. Here is an entire chapter of smut in which this happens ^^.

Otis is so vocal, especially when he's 'teaching' you how to take care of him. "Use your tongue a little more. Yeah, just like that. Ah, how about a little deeper now, hm? Can you do that for me, doll? Gods, yes, I knew those pretty lips were good for somethin'." He certainly can be very sweet and praise you lots - as long as you do what he wants.

It's such a thing for him to be the one who corrupts you. This goes not just for sex, but for anything. If you try alcohol for the first time with him, or try drugs, or get high/drunk for the first time, or help him torture a victim even though you're uncomfortable... Everything, honestly.

Telling him he ruined you for other men 👀👀👀. That shit's gonna go straight to his head and get him so riled up that you're left with wobbling legs and hickeys all over. Bitemarks too.

aughghhg i need him so bad 😩🥺

[destinyc1020]

My confessions:

A)I’m pretty much over this press tour 🥴. I knew it was going to come with fans being unhinged. Some wanting Timmy and Z only, for their shipping fantasies; some expecting all of them to be best buds; and everything in between. These are people, not our puppets, and every cast is not going to be bff’s. And that’s ok. They’re coworkers. Am I super close to all of my coworkers? Hell no! Can’t stand most of them lol. But we’re cordial and respectful, and do what we need to do, and only a couple have become good friends outside of work. Unfortunately, some people don’t seem to understand that. They’re being so rude to all of the cast, disrespecting their relationships, and this mess has to stop. Even though it comes from a small pocket of people, they’re loud, and people give them attention, and the shit spreads. And you know this toxic shit is getting back to Z and them, if they don’t see it themselves 🤦🏾‍♀️. It’s all immature, and sad, and further proves that something needs to be done about social media.

B)I think Florence is hot, and love her energy.

Happy Sunday 😊

Hey Girl! Thanks for your Sunday Confession. 🥰

I totally agree with everything you said. This type of behavior is just cringe, annoying, and really needs to stop. `And yea, honestly I think the DP2 cast gets along great! I think it's the FANS making it weird, or expecting something more than necessary. You can obviously tell that ALL of the cast members get along so well, and had a blast filming this movie.

Like I said the other day, some fans might wanna delete their Twitter app during this press tour (and maybe even during the "Challengers" press👀) just so that they can get some measure of normalcy, and actually ENJOY the press tour w/out all of the "noise".

RE: Florence... Yes! LOVE her! I love her sense of style. 😁

[mycological-mariner]

Please share your special salmon recipe with the whiskey and garlic 👀

YES!!

Okay all this is for one serving, feel free to go nuts I don’t believe in measuring cups. Also, these are more like guidelines than a strict recipe, so go as wild as you want with any of this stuff!

Ingredients:

Salmon

Bell peppers (I prefer the yellow ones for this)

Shallots

Garlic cloves, diced

Garlic salt

Black pepper

Rosemary

Fresh lemon (or lemon juice - or both!)

Whiskey - whichever brand is cheapest

A whole bunch of salad

Herb sauce (any kind will do and is totally optional)

Brown sugar

PREP!!

Get your bell pepper. Half of it is going on the fish, the other half in the salad. DICE!

Get your garlic cloves, however many you think will be good proportionally to your fish. DICE!!

Get a couple of shallots. DICE!!!

Get your lemon, all the bit you squeeze into the fish can be baked with it for extra pain zest- SLICE!! Or if using juice, wait a second.

Get all your herbs and spices.

COOK!

Throw that salmon onto a baking sheet. Take your whiskey and DOUSE it. The heat front the oven will sizzle the alcohol out (this I learned the hard way)

Sprinkle on the brown sugar (trust me)

Take your salt, pepper and other spices and herbs and apply however much you want. Go crazy with the garlic salt.

Get your pepper, garlic and lemon. Apply the lemon. If using the fruit, I recommended chopping it up and putting it on the fish while it bakes (but don’t eat unless you want to - again, lessons learned the hard way)

Add your diced goods!

Throw that sucker in the oven (180 - 200 Celsius, idk the temp marking on my oven wore away a long time ago - my oven is also powered by a nuclear reactor so while it may take 15 minutes for me, you might just wanna check)

Bake until nice and flaky! While you wait, throw together a quick salad! Arugula/rocket, the other half of that bell pepper, tomatoes - go crazy.

REMOVE THE FISH. Remove the lemon from the fish. Place fish on salad. Add herb sauce if you wish.

BOON APPETITE.

(Bonus mushroom side! Also with whiskey! Help I have so much whiskey and wine I don’t know what to do with it!

- Mushrooms, sliced

- double cream, unsliced (have not yet discovered way to slice liquid)

- garlic powder

- brown sugar

- salt

- whiskey

TO MAKE:

Throw it all in a pan on the stove. Add to whatever you want. Great on the salad beneath the salmon.)

I think what this has taught us all is that the only ingredients one will ever need is garlic enough to kill a vampire, whiskey and brown sugar.

If you make this. Well. I hope you like it!! Thanks for asking, I love sharing my recipes that actually work! <3

[themrsmunson]

"I know something sweeter than honey"

Preparing your altar with Eddie and one thing leads to another 👀

18 plus only

Eddie plus female, oral sex f recieving, vaginal / anal fingering

Mentions of witchcraft

Eddie struggles through the trailer door, arms weighed down with bags. "Babe where shall I put these?"

You smile at Eddie "Just here please". The bags tip over the counter, all the items for your spring altar spilling out, flowers, candles, seeds, citrus fruits, pomegranates, honey. You'll add your own tarot cards and crystals later. You take off his jacket (that he insisted you wear) and roll up the sleeves of your flannel shirt dress.

You start cutting oranges, having bought extra for an orange yoghurt cake. Eddie steps over and puts his arms around your waist, chin resting on your shoulder and hair tickling your cheek as he watches you. "Gonna be amazing sweetheart" he says before whispering in your ear "not as amazing as you though". You smile at your goofy boyfriend. You'll never tire of his voice complementing you.

Oranges sliced you measure out the dry ingredients, Eddie attached to you the entire time which makes for a cosy if clumsy experience. You start measuring out the honey and of course spill some on the counter. Your boyfriend is quicker than you, reaching out his finger to scoop up the spill and bring it to your mouth. You oblige and turn your head to look in his eyes which right now are wide and fixed straight on your mouth. "How's that taste?" he asks his voice deep and croaky. "Mmmm sweet" you respond, turning in his arms to face him. He bends down to kiss along the edges of your lips and jaw down to your neck and back up to your ear "I know something sweeter than honey though" he whispers, licking along the ridge of your ear.

It's not long before you are pulled into your bedroom, kisses deep, fast and dirty. Eddie pulls you down to your knees and turns you round bending you over the bed before kissing and biting his way up the backs of your thighs. You shudder as you feel his teeth grasping your underwear and tights, slowly pulling them down over your legs.

You tense and feel your cunt flutter with anticipation. "So I said I knew something sweeter than honey. Think I wanna taste of it right now". He pushes your knees apart, revealing your slick cunt to him. Your hands are grasping the bedsheets and you pant despite him not yet touching you. He doesn't leave you long though before slowly running his tongue from your clit to you hole, twirling and teasing, his hands grasping your hips and pulling you back onto his mouth. He worships you with mumbled praise throughout. "Taste so fucking good. Could die happy eating this pussy. Sweetest tasting cunt I ever had." He continues this at a torturous pace until you squirm and squeeze your pussy desperately.

He takes the hint and works his thumb into your hole, massaging your slick walls. He adds his pointer finger and gets it nice and wet before moving it to your asshole and gently working you open. You shudder underneath him, your mouth wide open and biting on your bedsheets as he massages his finger and thumb into both holes in tandem. His lips are attached to your clit throughout this and you push back with abandon as you feel your pleasure build and finally burst. You lurch forwards on the bed raising up as your powerful orgasm races through you.

Eddie gently strokes you until you can't take any more and shift away from him. He turns you round and and seats you on his lap before kissing you, making sure to get plenty of yourself in your mouth. "See, sweeter than honey".

[vigilskeep]

1 or 2 (whichever is more entertaining for you) for Trev sibs, Helena and Arthur, pls~ (We get a lot about their relationship together, I wanna see more of the family dynamic in general... 👀 👀)

how does your character think of their father/their mother? what do they hate and love about them? what influence, literal or imagined, did their parents have?

bann conrad trevelyan is a proud, severe warrior who pinned his life's hopes on his beloved firstborn son and never quite recovered from losing him to the circle, making his relative displeasure with his younger children clear, and risking the family's reputation to bribe templars for arthur's good treatment only to fail arthur too when the scandal came out and that help stopped coming. lady gisela is a sickly fluttering butterfly of a noblewoman with an ander's piety, all nerves and distraction, who was the first to stop reaching out to her children when everything became too upsetting and complicated for her to deal with

arthur has spent a fair amount of his life recovering from the guilt of being what he is, with measurable but not complete success. if he wasn't a mage, or if he'd had good enough self-control to hide it like his father tried to help him do, he'd be everything his parents wanted like he used to be and nothing would have gone wrong. he's always known he's his father's favourite which is gratifying, sure, he can't help it, and he's kind of subconsciously accustomed to being the centre of attention like that. also discomfiting when you have three younger siblings and it was your job to convince them he loves them too. all those bribes are debts he can't pay back and he's uncomfortable with them, uncomfortable that he has this protection because of his birth and none of his fellow mages do; he burns a lot of the safety his father bought by taking the fall for anyone else he can. and even with all that favouritism, after the bribe scandal comes out arthur tells his father it would be best for the family for him to stop coming to visit, and his father stops coming to visit. it's quite something to know exactly to what limit your father loves you. as for his mother gisela, arthur hasn't seen her in a long time. she was the first to stop visiting, and her fear and shock when she saw his magic was the most real. he tries not to blame her for any of it; he knows she loves him, and she shouldn't risk her health

helena is much more bitter towards their parents. as the replacement heir, she takes the brunt of their father's criticism, and his favouritism for the son he lost. without arthur to play diplomat this relationship gets fiery pretty quickly. gisela isn't spared from the mess, either. helena wants her to stand up for her, and she never does, always stepping back and turning away. helena's always resentful that they cared so much for arthur's loss and almost dismissed the lifelong burn injury to the face helena received from the outburst of his magic. helena ends up relying a lot on chantry tutors for guidance instead of her parents and this all eventually crashes and burns when helena leaves home to become a templar, actually ruining all their plans by choice. gisela still writes to her, mostly to try to guilt trip her into coming home as if you can just quit being a templar like that, but otherwise there's pretty much no association between her and her parents by dai and she tells josephine so in the game.

as for influence, i think arthur gets some of his... i don't want to say worst tendencies, let's say sharper qualities, from his father. his ambition, the deep-set anger he tries to hide, an instinct for cruelty that will truly cut. nothing he particularly likes about himself or doesn't keep on an extremely tight rein. but probably his charisma, too, which he relies on. and he gets his desire to play diplomat and keep everything peaceful, a love of elegance and beauty, and a quality he self-identifies as cowardice from his mother. helena has a lot of her father's directness and severity (i think what he criticised in her was a lot of what he didn't want to admit he saw in himself, whereas he saw arthur as what was better and more refined of himself) and her mother's reliance on faith