#I’m fist fighting myself internally | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ggsbooks123 · 9 months

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Fighting back (part three)

summary: jude wants things to be the way they were before as her memories finally come back to her but to do that, she has to start fighting back…

warning; sadly this is not the final part, some angst and fluff for surez y’all deserve it!

— — —

My mind should have been on the tunnels, on what dangers probably lurked around the corner. The voices against Peeta coming back… my own voice that now haunts me over and over with thoughts that sound… deserving. Instead, I can’t seem to shake Castor’s — Pollux’s brother — retelling of Pollux’s past and why he would be able to lead us through the tunnels.

He’d been an Avox, if I had taken the time to actually fight the thought in my head instead of letting his subdue me, letting it convince me that Peeta was evil. Peeta. I shake my head, waiting as the others climbed down the ladder, I couldn’t even look at him or Pollux now, two people who deserved better.

I clenched my fists as Pollux and I stood alone before the ladder, he stared at me but not in a way that was offensive more that he was reading me. Trying to sense if you’ll kill him next, I frown before quickly stepping down the ladder after Cressida, the daylight from outside began to dwindle more and more as I climbed down, soon the artificial lighting from the tunnel creeped in, it wasn’t anything special.

Lucky for us.

The last thing we needed was a spotlight on us.

Finally joining back with the group all we have to do is wait for Pollux to climb down and when I glance to my right, Castor is beside me with that same questionable look, reading reading reading. I internally tell myself to shut up, it felt like I was a record held on loop, utterly out of my control. Was I getting worse?

“You okay? Pollux wanted to check on you more but wasn’t sure if you were warm to meeting new people yet” Castor speaks with a easy calmness, I envy it even now I can feel my hands shaking and beads sweating at my forehead but still I take a deep breath.

“The-“ Could I say voices? “The thoughts I’ve been having have changed direction, not to anyone of you and it’s not so easy to push down but no one should get hurt by it” No one but you, the voice seems to jeer. He smiles lightly at that but I’m not finished “Pollux is incredibly brave, I- I didn’t take the time to talk to anyone but I had tunnel vision and I wasn’t fighting but now I am and I want to know who I’m fighting with” Somehow his smile widens as Pollux finally comes down and reaches our side immediately seeking comfort in this dark place with his brother.

The others are standing a little away from us, already taking a peek at what lies ahead but it’s nothing but endless tunnel and tracks, surely there wouldn’t be any trains running at the moment. But we’d been lucky with the lights, two times lucky definitely wasn’t our thing. Suddenly an intake of breath makes me glance back at the brothers beside me, Pollux is now sweating profusely and can’t seem to take in a breath for the life of him. Maybe he remembered how you sent his friend to his death, I try to push my voice down so I can focus but it’s weeded within me like a virius. It is me.

Instantly my hand comes to his shoulder, I see Castor beside me reach for his weapon and understand his actions and try not to let myself be hurt by it as Pollux’s eyes connect with mine, I wouldn’t let the Capitol control thrm anymore, not with fear, not while they assaulted me with it.

“They wont hurt you again, Pollux. I swear on my life, you will see the end of Snow” I hear it, trying to sliver back it, Snow’s voice. Kill him, let him burn for- No, not anymore.

And this time, I’m met with silence… An itch remains, but I know it’s self-inflicting and safe, for now.

But i’d fought for them, and I’d keep doing it. I smile at Pollux as he takes a deep breath, Castor’s hand had moved from reaching for his gun to Pollux’s other arm, “We got you, buddy” Pollux smiles gratefully at the two of us, wiping at tears I hadn’t noticed fell before we finally joined the group.

Jackson and Katniss seemed to take lead with Pollux as the rest of tagged behind, as I moved to follow I noticed a certain blonde missing and instantly spin to locate the missing boy and sigh of relief comes out when he’s standing behind me, looking at me and the smallest flicker of hope. But it’s gone in an instant, as he clears his throat “That was nice of you, I wasn’t sure I’d had known what to do”

How heartless do you have to be to be thanked for being nice. My voice heckles me and I clench my jaw.

“It’s awful, I always think I’d had it bad then I actually open my ears to other peoples experiences and I just- I understand now. Why this fight is so necessary, its all clicking” I admit to him, it’s not much to work on but I’d do anything to see that hope in his eyes again, the stars ill never reach… Oh Peeta.

I feel myself reach out for him before I snap back into my body. You don’t deserve him, and you never will. You never did.

I turn and walk to catch up to the others, though my mind is everywhere at once. I want to get better, and be better and stay alive but the nightlock pocket burns and burns and burns, i know that I have to use it, i know that I’m too far gone too far gone too- I shake my head, I need to stop doing that.

My mind is on fire and my feet won’t stop, until I slam into a hard wall. No, my head doesn’t ache and the wall’s arms have closed around me? No, not a wall. I look up, and I frown. Finnick always manages to find me at my worst, how does he do it? I’ll have to ask him some time.

I shake my head, what the hell was I thinking? I had just run off on Peeta and now I was talking about wanting to ask Finnick something, I shouldn’t have run. But my mind is scrambled whenever he latches on and lets go, was this how I’d live? Latching onto to him my whole life, a dead weight chained to his ankle…

“You’re mumbling and kinda freaking me out” Finnick’s voice is like someone taking a sledgehammer to a static tv, the silence is deafening in my skull. I look up at him “I’m sorry for saying anything, this is way creepier” I let out a chuckle and shake my head.

“You’re such an asshole” I whisper, my hand rubbing at my temples as a headache grows there, and the unreachable itch never sways but I’ve grown accustomed to it, sometimes it felt as if it wasn’t there, never like how it evaporates when Peeta touches me though.

I don’t understand, it didn’t work like that with the other voice, I’d tried to kill him enough and our skin had touched, but why now? “I- Peeta deserves so much more than some broken girl” Is all I manage to whisper.

And I’m waiting for it, the obviously, no wonder look at you, it seriously took you this long to figure that out. But they don’t come and when he does speak, I don’t understand how I could think so lowly of him sometimes .

“That guy could live a hundred lifetimes with hundreds of different girls and I’m almost positive that they’re all forgotten when finally meets you” I freeze, looking up at Finnick

“Finnick I-“

“You don’t see because you want him to hate you for what you’ve done, but he loves you so much and I really hope you remember how much you reciprocated that… I thought I loved Annie with everything in me until I saw you looking at Peeta before the 75th games” He shakes his head, a dazed smile on his face “You were looking at your whole life right in front of you, your future and you looked on top of the world”

I bit my lip and close my eyes for a moment because I can feel it, the warmth in my chest and clench of my stomach with how I left him. I did love him with everything in me, and more.

And I couldn’t give up now.

— — —

“Maybe the tunnels weren’t the best idea” Finnick teases after we dashed into another passing tunnel to avoid a train making it’s way through and we all distastefully look at him, his eyes flick between all of us “Top side?” Pollux huffs and I can’t help but smile, poking his head around the corner to make sure everything was clear.

I take the time to look over at Peeta, we hadn’t said anything to each other after I ran off like a child, I wanted to groan into my hands right there. You’re just kids, after what I just did it wasn’t so surprising anymore. I wanted to be able to put all this behind us and give into that hope that he was so easily filled with but I just can’t- Not after Boggs and Mitchell… I close my eyes as we wait for the tram to pass us.

“We definitely can’t stay here” Katniss speaks up, and this time Pollux doesn’t seem to annoyed by the fact, probably because Finnick liked to tease and lighten a situation, and this situation was one that definitely needed it but was a little to obvious when someone did.

Pollux waves over his shoulder before we’re jogging over the tracks that were just being used, quick and together to make sure no one gets left behind and hoping another tram doesn’t soon come through again. But it’s not long before we reach a door and Pollux takes a second to unlock it before quickly rushing inside, and Cressida turned to me quickly, us being the first two behind Pollux “Wanna stay here and make sure everyone gets in?”

My heart warms, she trusted me. I tried not to show how much it meant to me as I nodded, placing my back to the door keeping it open as I rushed the others inside. The first one behind me is Finnick who sends me a wink, probably knowing how much this small tasks means to me.

They’re finally seeing me as a member and not a bomb about to go off. I try not to get my hopes up especially when a certain blonde passes next, he sends me a soft smile, eyes lingering half a second too long before he was out of sight through the door, I let out a breath I hadn’t even noticed I was holding. The next few go by uneventfully, Messalla and Castor who both send me smiles, Messalla a little more strained I knew he was friends with Mitch more so than anyone here. Then holding up the rear is Jackson and finally Katniss.

Her brown eyes burn into mine as I look down at my feet, something that slowly makes it way in is the memories of Katniss. I hadn’t realised how much they had wiped until recently, the voices spitting at me for forgetting her, my best friend. The girl who saved my life when she didn’t even know who I was.

The 74th Hunger games is what I’m tossed back into, watching all the time in between pass before I’m watching myself dart through the forest.

I run and run until I can’t stop, and I know it’s not long away now. The careers’s had broken apart to try to cut me off but I’d managed to lose three of them but one of them were still right on my tail, there was no way I would be able to outrun him, I’d caught a sight of his brown hair and lanky form. Especially with the things I had done in the past twenty minutes to get rid of his three friends. The forest leaves smacked into me and the humid air around me wasn’t helping my panting breaths. I would either stop on my own or collapse and stopping wasn’t an option.

I take the moment of silence behind me to look over my shoulder… there’s no one behind me. I let myself slow as I plant my hands on my knees, desperately trying to suck air into my lungs. I think back to what my mentor said, that I should try and ally with some of the victors but I couldn’t do it, not when I knew I’d have to kill them by the end of it. But now, standing here physically unable to stand on my own, I wish someone was there to watch my back.

Because I hear the footsteps coming from my right far to late, I quickly shoot up just in time for Career’s shoulder to smack directly into my stomach as he tackles me to the ground, even with the fatigue crawling through my bones I struggle underneath him, kicking my legs in every direction but his legs are on both sides of my torso, locking my arms against my body. Panic began to flare within me, I was going to die.

The boy actually laughs as I struggle, it’s sickening to watch and I don’t understand how I could have forgotten the fear and panic I’d felt spewing from me. “Weak little sheep, thought you could survive on your own did ya?” He laughs again, pulling a blade from his waistband, I try to push him off again, and manage to slip my arm out the slightest bit but he quickly swipes causing me to cry out as blood now seeps from my arm, giving him time to lock it back into place with his leg. “Any last words?”

I open my mouth ready to rain every curse word I’d learnt but his face of humour switches to shock as I hear a sickening crunch and an arrow protrudes from his chest, I swallow my gasp as I quickly push him off me, no longer impossible to do since all his strength had been sucked form his body the moment that arrow hit him, redirecting his dead weight to send himself backwards as I scrambled away and looked around in the trees. Who ever had shot that either tried to help me or was trying to kill two birds with one arrow.

Finally a girl steps out from the trees, I shoot up to my feet instantly when I notice the bow trained on me in her hands. I couldn’t remember her name at this very moment but I knew she was from District 12, I still thought about her flaming dress. My designers wouldn’t shut up about Cinna and I myself couldn’t stop thinking about his designs so I couldn’t blame them. “He killed Rue” Are the first words she says, as I look back down at the boy who now lays dead.

“So you would have let him kill me if he hadn’t killed your friend?” I let out a huff, I shouldn’t complain, I was saved wasn’t I. But her standing there with her bow ready to strike didn’t feel to safe. And she doesn’t respond to my question, I fix the straps on my shoulders of my bag before sighing “Want some clean water?” Her eyes perk at that but still the bow stays trained, “I promise I won’t try and kill you” I smile at her and finally the bow drops as she grimaces at me.

“And what if you’re lying” Neither of us realised that we were going to become far more than acquaintances sharing clean water.

I shrug with an even more mischievous grin “You’ll just have to trust me. I’m Jude”

She frowns slightly before slinging her bow over her shoulder and brought her hand towards me “Katniss and you better not be lying or I’ll shoot you next”

“And I believe you”

I feel the memory swirling and changing but I refuse it, this is the memory. I know it, Katniss just being precautious. The only part of the memory that left me stumped was my nonchalance, and outgoing nature. I couldn’t imagine smiling at Katniss a couple seconds after I’d nearly lost my life but I was an incredibly different person back then than I was now. I’m finally back in the sewers, watching Katniss slip past me but my hand catches her wrist. Her gaze meets mine again and this time I speak “Why did you save me in the 74th Hunger Games?” I knew why, she said because the guy had killed Rue. But it didn’t feel right.

Itch itch itch. It grows the more the silence spreads. Did they all feel the need to hesitate and raise my blood pressure?

She looked at me like I wasn’t real before whispering “I knew you’d be important to me, I didn’t know how but I heard you scream and I acted before thinking. After you shared your water with me I planned on ditching you but you have a habit of digging into peoples hearts without them knowing it” She frowns, staring at me so intensely that I have to stop the tears from falling, she barely had looked at me since I’d come and to see her unflinching, it made my heart warm. My other half. I didn’t know how’d I’d gone so long without her. “I’m so sorry I couldn’t save you-“

I don’t let her finish, my arms shoot around her neck as she returns the embrace immediately “I’m sorry, I should’ve been stronger” I whisper but I feel her shake her head before she pulls away slightly to look at my face and presses our foreheads together.

“We’re together again, we’ve always been stronger together” I smile sadly at her words before she fully pulls way and links her arm with mine “They’re probably waiting on us, ready to head down?” I nod, warming at the rush of memories that slowly flood me, small things like Katniss and I in the water seeing who can dunk the other first, her teaching me how to shoot her bow.

Without Katniss I wouldn’t have survived this long and if I had never allied with her I wouldn’t have won the games with Peeta and her, I would have never met the blonde boy who I thought of night and day, who’d I sacrifice everything for.

That was who Katniss and Peeta are, how could I have ever wanted the hurt them? My best friend and the love of my life, I’ll never go back to that. At that thought the pocket above my heart burns, Only when I have to.

And I find myself for the first time as I gaze at her brunette braid, that I don’t want to leave them. But it’d be better for all of them if you did.

Katniss climbs down first, I wait till she’s a fair bit down before I go after her, except I feel slightly betrayed when a smell hits my nose. It’s everything that could possibly have smelt bad smooshed into one place, I wanted to gag or climb back up the ladder but that definitely wasn’t an option so I gagged instead “How’re you not throwing up right now?” I manage to say between holding my breath and own fluids from appearing on the floor.

She shakes her head, “I’ve smelt worse” She doesn’t say it in a rude way, no, it’s more haunted and I want to hold her again but my hands are securely holding on to the ladder as I slowly make my way down. I hear the team as we finally reach the ground and the smell has only intensified, I can’t hope to grow use to the smell but I knew we’d be down here so I don’t have to just try to ignore it. Maybe breath through my mouth, I grimace.

“How’s it look?” Jackson asks, making Katniss pull the holo from her pack. I join Finnick’s side as Katniss heads to the front of the group. I smile to her as she looks over her shoulder and sends one back, warmth flares me. My best friend.

Finnick raised the restricts at me “We won’t-“

“Put them on me, Finn” I smile sadly, “Precaution” He sighed, nodding sadly before restraining my hands together, not as tight as before but enough to restrain me.

He smiles softly at me as I looked back up at the rest of the group, my eyes always automatically falling into Peeta. He doesn’t notice, engrossed in whatever Katniss is showing him on the holo.

Finnick nudges me “After.”

I smile at the blonde boy, who had his back to me before looking up at Finnick to my left “After”

— —

We’re slowly making our way through the tunnels, the open space now shifted into a tighter tunnel, causing us to form a single file line. I stood behind Cressida and in front of Finnick.

The only light is from Katniss’s holo but that does little when I’m four people behind her, I squint trying to adjust to the brightness.

A few of us had flashlights but the beam was so small it barely helped.

“Can you see any-“ A pipe bursts suddenly beside me, pressurised air broke from the pipe right into my path causing me to let out a scream.

Instantly I crouched, luckily it wasn’t scorching but it left a bad taste in my mouth, my ear on my left was ringing.

What if there was worse than faulty pipes? Maybe this wasn’t the best idea, maybe they’ll get lucky and you’ll die down here.

Finnicks hand caught my shoulder before I could growl at the voice in my head… my own damn voice i have to keep reminding myself.

“Are you-“ He didn’t get to finish before I’m lifted by my arms to my feet suddenly and i’m staring into panicked blue eyes.

“Are you hurt?!” Peetas eyes search me head to toe, his hand trailing over my arms, scowling at the restraint for a moment, and stomach not even noticing the way I tremble under his touch. And I almost freeze when his skin touches mine.

It’d been so long so i’d felt him… And my head finally clicks the relief I feel, the itch is gone

“Yeah…” I respond breathily, heat coming to my cheeks “Yeah” I can’t form another word, he seems to catch on freezing and taking a step back, his pink cheeks no doubt matching mine. I have to hold my temple for a moment as the itch slowly returns, had it faded because of Peeta. My heart swelled with hope but I didn’t let it show.

He clears his throat, “Right, best keep going then.” He looked over my shoulder, nodding his head before trailing back and I want to follow him, stay by his side but I don’t move and soon the group is moving again.

We keep the single file line since the tunnels never seem to widen, no, instead it seems to throw obstacle after obstacle at us, I grimace as I watch Cressida drop into the shoulder deep water.

“Afraid of water, Jude?” She jokes as I don’t move from the ledge, “Can’t hurt ya” No more than you’ve hurt others- Or how others have hurt me, I scream back in my head.

“Jude?” She mutters again and I nod my head, smirking at the relief in my head for the moment.

“You’re right,” I take a breath and drop into the water, trying to hold in a gag when it splashed into my face, I raise my hands keeping my restraint from getting soaked“Totally not piss and shit”

Finnick drops behind and laughs “Keep saying it and it might come true” I shoot him a look as we begin to shuffle in the water, I thank whoever designed the suits because if I had a inkling of skin outside below the neck I’d probably die from the feel of whatever this was.

“We going to pretend you didn’t blush like a schoolgirl when Peeta grabbed you before?” Finnick whispered in my ear suddenly, making me jump and heat sprouted through me at the memory from moments ago.

“Shut up, before I drown you in piss and shit” He laughs and lucky for him doesn’t try to continue the conversation.

— —

Once we were walking for about thirty minutes and finding nothing but endless tunnels, Jackson spoke up to break the silence “All right, everybody, we’re gonna stop here for a bit and get some rest, yeah?”

Slowly the group walked up a staircase and into a grate pathway. I glanced around, watching everyone get comfortable as Finnick nudged me “Sit there, I’ll take first watch”

I nod, biting my lip as I took a seat with my back against the railing closest to the staircase, I heard some laughter and talking as I crossed my arms and gazed at the doorway we came through, running through everything that could happen in the next couple of days.

We could all die or Snow could… The world could change or we’d become forgotten. It wasn’t good to think like that, no, Snow would pay.

I glanced around at everyone now, slowly settling in for the night. And though Finnick said he’d watch me, his gaze is wondering. We all wanted Snow to pay, and he would.

Finnick didn’t say much to me, probably hoping i’d fall asleep but I couldn’t every creak had me jumping and cracking an eye open, I’d seen three changes of watch before finally when I peeked, blonde came into my vision.

I stiffened, I didn’t know what to do, I cracked an eye open a little wider and unlike Finnick, Peeta’s whole attention is on me and no mercy to my heart, he’s smiling at me. Itch, itch ,itch. I bring my hand to my temple again, just as Peetas boot pushes against mine and it’s gone, my head snaps up to him. He’s looking at me with a calculating look, working out easily what was going through my head. But at this moment, I wouldn’t even notice the itch my chest felt like it was going to burst.

Does he care that he makes my heart beat out of my chest? This feeling feels like it could physically kill me. “Cant sleep?” His voice is quiet but carried across the quiet walkway. No mention of our boots touching.

“Yeah, not the best place i’ve ever slept” I respond, I don’t want to shut him out. But I don’t know what to say, what did we use to talk about? Was that appropriate now?

He doesn’t say anything for a moment and just stares at me, did I mess up? God, so many questions when it came to him. Yet I knew one thing was certain, my heart adored him.

“Ask me a question” This time his voice isn’t quiet due to his whisper, his words are a breath and have goosebumps rising all over. You don’t deserve him. Its voice is so distant I almost don’t make it out.

Ask me a question. His voice rings louder in my head, suppressing the voice as I let my eyes meet his as I think, what? What could I possibly-

“Right, because we’re going to pull off what we did last year. Please tell me you didn’t come all this way to tell me fantasies” My voice slams into me, but not like normal, no, I remember this.

The night we learnt we were going back in, I’d run from the tv and fallen on my knees in the backyard of my victors home and wept for hours. Even after there was nothing left to cry I sat there.

And of course, when he could have been down the street at his own house, worrying instead he had found himself here.

“They’re not fantasies, we don’t have to let them win” He whispered, probably not wanting to scare me but I was terrified, absolutely terrified that he might die.

“Stop being stupid, okay. Just stop.” I look at him over my shoulder, “Just go back to your house and forget about me so it’s easier in a couple months ” I spit the words, hateful hateful words but I won’t have him feeling a connection to me, not if it costs him his life.

“For me? Or for you?” I shoot a harsher glare at him now, but my thoughts ring sadder thoughts, both of us.

“For you!” He chuckles, he actually freaking chuckles. That makes me shoot to my feet as I skin on my heels. And there he is, Peeta Mellark is laughing! “Are you seriously laughing?!”

He shakes his head, the laughter dying but the smile remains “You seriously don’t know do you?”

I cross my arms over my chest as I glare at him, “If you’re trying to be funny right now, it’s not working.” He sighs, taking a step forwards me, I take a step back “I told you to go”

“And why was that again?” He asked, tapping his chin. God, I hated him when he knew more than me in a situation like this, he became so confident, so hard to resist.

My neck flushed and slowly creeped to my cheeks as I clenched my fists at my side “You need to leave so you can kill me when the time comes” I say the words plain and simple, his smile final drops.

And suddenly I’m more frustrated because he’s right in front of me, for once he’s feet seemed to have made a silent approach and I can no longer find my breath as his hand slowly comes to my cheek as his thumb brushes the skin under my eye.

His blue eyes are all I see and want to see forever, and then he’s speaking “It’s too late for that, sweetheart” My heart explodes.

And somehow I choke out “Explain” He laughs, it’s deeper this time and heat explodes, all I want is him.

“I love you, Jude. More than I ever thought possible” My mouth hangs open and he smiles wider, pressing his hand under my chin to shout my mouth before leaning forward and kissing me softly.

His soft lips moving against mine, I never wanted to move away from the heat and softness he pressed upon me. I let my hands raise up his chest and catch in his curls at the nape of his neck before we finally pull away, and all I see is blue again.

Then I’m back, staring at those same blue eyes and I’ve realised how stupid i’ve been. Because he’s looking at me the exact same way he looked at me back in my backyard.

“After the 75th Hunger Ganes was announced… You came to me and you-“

“Real. I told you that I love you more than I ever thought possible” I can’t breathe “And everyday you prove it to me more and more, Jude. I love you”

And I knew it deep down, that he wasn’t lying that he never was lying. And I also already know my response, the warmth rushes in blaring out the itch in my skull for what feels like maybe forever but before I can speak there’s a whisper that makes me freeze.

Katniss. Peeta. No! No, they couldn’t be back. Katniss. Peeta. Katniss- It repeats over and over again, I slam my hands over my ears knowing it won’t-

It worked. There’s silence, I look up at Peeta and he looking at me, not in fear but concern. I remoce my hands and get to my feet “Peeta.” I whisper, staring down the staircase. I feel though, that feeling of pure and unadultured rage.

It’s not coming from me though, I throw my head over my shoulder at Katniss “Both of you, go now! The rest of us will be behind you!” I demand, tightening my hands on the chain from the restrain, needing somehting solid for whatever the hell was about to go down.

“Keep your voice down!” Gale whispers harshly as I glare at him.

“They’ve released mutts! These things were made to kill them, I don’t think our voices matter, what does matter is moving.” I bring my eyes back to Katniss and Peeta, they both look too worried about everyone else and not about themselves “Pollux you know a way out?” He nods, “Follow him and get out! Go!”

Quickly Pollux ran out, Katniss and Peeta right behind him while the rest of quickly followed, I didn’t know where everyone was but I knew Pollux and Gale had the front while Jackson watched our backs.

Gale shot a fire arrow further into the tunnel, helping us see ahead, luckily nothing was there but I could feel them still, I couldn’t hear the voices rather feel them bouncing off the walls, it left me cold and terrified.

In a matter of seconds his arrow went out and we were plunged into darkness, once again the tiny flashlights being our only light. We continued cautiously, Gale shooting whenever we came to a cross roads to make sure nothing jumped out at us.

I almost internally screamed when we had to watch Pollux climb through an opening and wait for him to give the all clear, I’d just gotten to know Pollux and from his history.

I didn’t want to know what person i’d become if he died like this, my breath released when he came back and gave us a thumbs up, and slowly we all climbed through, the restraint on my wrist didn’t make things easy as I misjudged the stretch of it as I went tumbling towards the ground but hands caught me and brought me back to my feet.

“At least your clumsiness hasn’t changed” Peeta jokes, dusting me off and returning to the group. I love you, Jude. I clenched my fists, After after after.

Katniss came through after me, the three of us coming together. A small smile coming to my face, this could be the future, the three of us together again. Including Finnick since there was no way he was getting rid of me now.

I glance over Katniss’s shoulder to make sure Jackson got through okay, just in time to watch four mutts jump from the darkness and tear her to shreds “Holy-“ I don’t get time to finish before Katniss his pulling back and arrow and launching it.

An explosive arrow.

She flies back from the blow, slamming into me and then Oeeta but somehow he manages to keep us all up right and yells “Go! Run!” And we don’t think twice, I pay respects to Jackson in my mind.

Another person dead who saved my life, when would it be my turn?

The sounds of rushed footsteps in the water and yelling was all that occurred within the next few minutes, I couldn’t tell if we were even following the right path at this point or just running for survival.

Screeches sounded from all over and I couldn’t tell what tunnel the mutts would shoot out from, then a scream sounded behind me “Castor!”

The words left an ice over my skin, as I spun to see mutts crawling over each other to get to Castor, who in no way could be alice anymore. Finnick ran into me and didn’t waste a second to drag me along with him.

So many dead, dead, dead. I shook my head, finally picking up my feet and racing alongside Finnick and Gale.

Being restraint was definitely the stupidest decision I had made, all I could do was run as the others fought off the mutts. Though losing Castor somehow Pollux still managed to lead the charge, finally pointing to a ladder in the middle of a room… that had four entrances.

Instantly the mutts rushed in, Katniss and Pollux went to firing arrows and bullets at them, keeping most of them at bay, Peeta spraying his automatic, taking out a fair amount until it clicked and it began to ram it into any white heads he saw. Finnick doing the same with his golden spinning trident, he was a dancer with that thing.

I kept my eyes alert, ready for anything to come for me as I glanced at the entrances, hoping more of our group turned up… Cressida still wasn’t here.

But my mind went blank from eveyrthing as I heard a yell, a mutt had Peeta pressed to the wall. His arm the only thing keeping it away, I froze. I had nothing to help him with, nothing, nothing- My gaze meets my restraint.

And in that moment of thought, I’m running and jumping onto to the mutts back, wrapping my restraint around its neck and pulling, not expecting the attack it easily falls backwards, causing its weight to fall onto me.

Ouch, is all I can think as the wind is knock out of me and it spins in my grasp and suddenly my hands are the only things keeping it away l “Holy shit! Holy shit” I scream as it snaps his jaws at me, pure and unadulterated terror causes through me.

Katniss jumps into the brawl to my thanks and sends her foot into his face, sending it sprawling as I scrambled away, only for another to leap from the water. I didn’t even realise the water was deep enough for that!

It’s long fingers latch onto my ankle and drag me, without thinking I spin and scratch at the floor for any surface to grab but there’s nothing, I look up, blue. “Peeta!”

“Jude!” And then i’m underwater.

— —

I yanked upward, gasping for air as my eyes adjusted to the pure chaos still ensuing taking in whose in front of me, somehow I find it in me to smile “Cressida”

She smiles back, quickly shooting something behind me “Reunion later, duck!” I do as told as she shoots again but my luck has run out, while she’s not looking one leaps at me, sending me onto to my side as I reached up with both hands, sending the restraint strap into its razor sharp mouth.

Within a second it’s teeth have torn it to nothing and now there’s nothing blocking it from- Peetas gun comes down and smacks it off me as he drags me to my feet “You okay?!”

“Let’s get the hell out of here now!” He nodded, no doubt agreeing before latching my now free hand with his before he began to swing his weapon at anything that was in our way, Cressida was helping others up the ladder as we made our way.

I looked over my shoulder wuickly to see Finnick wielding his spinning trident, he was incredible to watch as he tore down mutt after mutt, he yelled somehting at Katniss causing her to run towards the ladder… Without him.

“We can’t leave Finnick!” I yelled over the screeching to Peeta, he glanced over his shoulder before killing another two mutts.

“We don’t have time! Finnick can protect himself” But that wasn’t good enough, I raced in front of Peeta running to the bottom of the ladder, praying Peeta kept any mutts from getting to me for the moment.

“Cressida, your gun!” The moment the words left my mouth I knew the request wouldn’t be accepted, I’d be a psychotic case days ago there’s no way, suddenly a gun dropped into my hands. “Thank you!”

I turn around to face Peeta, knowing for the moment that he was right. Finnick could protect himself, I shot at any mutts that were close to Peeta before ushering him over, planning on sending him up and staying to help Finnick get up.

“I can get him and I both up, you go” Peeta says quickly taking the gun from me without fight since I wasn’t expecting it, I almost want to fight for it back but a mutt comes for me and he quickly pushes me behind him to shoot it before turning back to me “You won’t sacrifice yourself for this, I won’t let you”

I stiffen at that, glancing over at Finnick whose slowly started to make his way over to us, and then I look back at Peeta “Don’t you dare die, Peeta” And then I climbed up the ladder, quickly being pulled up by Katniss and Cressida.

My heart hurt at the lack in number that now looked back at me as I finally let out a breath and feeling a chill wash over me from my wet clothes and hair but my heart stilled, Pollux was sat crying… Castor.

I would be the same if those two boys don’t climb up that ladder, I spun on my butt to watch the hatch Id crawled from, they had to make it. They both had to make it…

The moments ticked by and the screeching only got worse as the bullets flew until they stopped and I finally gave up- Finnick sprung from the hatch, quickly pulled himself up and rolling, my heart leapt as I kept watch not letting myself hope and then the blonde comes and I want to cry tears of joy.

“Nightlock, Nightlock, Nightlock” Katniss quickly says, dropping the holo into the hatch and killing the rest of the mutts that deigned to follow us.

Finnick smiles at me, opens his mouth to no doubt play off the whole situation but my arms are around him and i’m crying, I can’t stop. Everything over the past few days has built and built and built til this moment and I nearly lost them… Finnick and Peeta. My head shot up, locking eyes with him. I raised my right arm and quickly tossed it around Peeta, though there wasn’t much room we made it work. They were alive.

“I knew you loved me” Finnick sighs out as I let myself chuckle and pull away, letting myself hit him “Ow! I could be a hit from death y’know!”

I let out a breath “I wanna punch you but I am so glad you’re still here to annoy me”

“Are you guys always-“ Peeta begins with a smile but he’s cut off.

“Guys! We gotta go, they’re here.” Gales alarmed voice breaks the few moments of content, but we’re straifht to our feet and following the rest of the group “Keep Moving!”

I lose Finnick and Peeta as Gale is rushing us into a hall full of hundreds of orange pillars, and when things couldn’t get worse Peacekeepers began to rain down bullets.

“Don’t let them escape!” I hear a muffled voice as another volley of bullets fly but i’m frozen at the doorway, everything in my body is telling me to move but I can feel the itch grab its hold.

Let them get you, you deserve everything that is coming to you.

Suddenly a hand latches on to me, my eyes dart up and see brown, It’s Messalla, we hadn’t spoken but he’d come back for me “Come on, kid!”

He doesn’t waste a moment, dragging my dead feet behind him, somehow dodging the bullets, he picked up his paste now and once my legs got moving he finally let me go.

“Alright, almost there we just got to-“ Suddenly some of the numerous lights I hadn’t noticed turn on, including the one right on top of Messalla.

The beam sucks up his entire form, evaporating him in seconds. Just like that, another one of us is dead. I want to freeze and scream at the peacemakers thinking that any of this was okay, but i’ve got too much momentum, I would meet the same end. Yes… The pressure in my head isn’t an itch, it’s almost stroking, pleased to finally get what it wants.

I try to plant my feet into the ground but it’s too close and i’m going too fast. I slam my eyes shut at the smallest hint of heat before i’m grabbed by my elbow and pulled to my right.

I hear a few of my hairs singe in the light before my body is getting pulled again. NO. I wince, letting my free hand dart to my temple as my feet matched the ones beside me, but my foot catches but the arm that saved me once, pull me up and balance me.

“I got you!” Finnick yells over the chaos, weaving through the flickering lights as i try to grasp the last two minutes. He’d saved my life, it wouldn’t be the first time, I shake my head knowing the more I let my own voice torment me its wish will come true. Knowing if the others were okay would help but I can’t see anyone else, the lights so bright I had to look away whenever they turned on.

It was better i focused on Finnick and I and hope the others make it until I see Cressida umoving, looking passed me with a horrified look. Messalla… I feel guilt rise in me but I still grab her as we pass, I couldn’t lose her too. Not Cressida. “Come on! I’m sorry but come on!” I yell to her and we’re finally making progress through the hall when a crack sounds behind us.

Though I know whatever I find behind me won’t be good I look anyways, in sections the floor cracks and shatters, slowly and slowly makes it way too us. All of this to kill you, stop fighting.

I grit my teeth, turning my head forward and pushing my body as fast as it could go, I wouldn’t die here. But it’d be better for all of them if you did… It grows louder each time, flashes of me kicking Mitch into the oil comes back to me and my hand reaching for Peetas throat. No, no, no, no.

Peeta, Katniss and Gale stand waving their hands at us but I can’t hear them, Give up, give up, give up. It screams now. The shattering behind us gets worse as I dodge left to miss a light, a bullet skims past my ear, I keep running. Give up, Give up ,GIVEUPGIVEUPGIVEUP.

I crumble to the floor, pressing my forehead to the ground, begging begging begging, it to stop. I slam my eyes shut, covering my ears praying they would just stop. YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED, DIE, DIE. Snows voice is harsh and shatters my skull as I cry out, no no no no, it was meant to be gone. It couldn’t be back, I couldn’t take it if it was back.

I reach for my heart-

Hands quickly lifted me up my arms, and then suddenly their hands meet my cheeks and everything is silent, my eyes snap open as whimpers leave my lips uncontrollably, blue is everywhere and I want to crawl into a ball again, he should never have to see me like this, not after I gave him so much hope…

“We’re nearly out of here okay?” I don’t respond, my eyes darting all over his face but my hand lays forgotten at my side. “I can’t lose you, Jude. Not again, alright, I-“ He looked utterly terrified, but continued anyway “I love you” And then, his lips were on mine and my mind clicked, warmth spread from my head to my toes. I love you, it repeated over and over in my head like a symphony. And I love him.

Peeta’s never lied to me, and I know in this moment, if I took my Nightlock pill I’d be killing him all the same. He was my life just as much as I was his, every breath I took was for him and I’d keep fighting. For him.

I smiled lightly when he pulled away before whispering “I love you too”

He squeezed my cheek a little tighter, whether he knew the way his touch effected me I didn’t know but I was grateful all the same when he let go and intertwined our hands within the second.

“I’m definitely not losing you now” And my heart exploded in joy.

———

part (1, 2, 3, 4)

I CAN NOT APOLOGISE ENOUGH AND MORE BECAUSE PART 4 ISNT DONE IK IM SORRY, ITS ALREADY HALFWAY DONE BUT IM SO SORRY GUYS

IDK WHAT HAPPENED TIME IS MOVING WAYYYY TO QUICKLY😭

taglist baddies: @yazminetrahan @solarbxby @abbersreads @antonietta18 @jennaaaaaaaaaaaa @imobssesedwithtoomanysheet @sipsthecoffee @life-ugh @sunnydays-funnydays @bilesxbilinskixlahey @sadierosec @molyyyt @goosy-goose @beaniebeensbaby201

(i promise i tried to add everyone that commented to be added but some of you i couldn’t find xx)

#hunger games #peeta mellark #peeta supremacy #the hunger games #katniss everdeen #books and reading #fanfic #imagine #romance #coriolanus snow #peeta mellark imagine #books

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sanjisblackasswife · 2 years

Text

So I forgot who it was (I’m so sorry if u see it pls lmk and I’ll tag u) but the person re logged this drawing I did and said “Imagine Sanji telling her how much he loves her skin “ and something else I forgot BUT I UNDERSTOOD. So imma do it rn so here is some Soft Sanji.

“Just As You Are” Sanji x Black Fem Reader (Fluff)

CW: Mentions of racism/colorism/Verbal Abuse/Mental Health, Very much fluff, Reader is insecure and sad, happy ending

It was always different.

How people looked at you, how you weren’t the “ideal” woman. Was it your hair? The way you dress? How you talk?

Maybe it was your skin.

You grew up not loving your self. You were adopted into a family that treated you as if you weren’t even human, you were constantly talked about your melanin, you weren’t beautiful, so many disrespectful comments and mockery of you being black it made you not accept the true love the Strawhats gave you. They didn’t care if you were black, white, yellow, or blue they love you for you!

Especially a certain cook.

You’ve had a few episodes of panic attacks when all eyes were on you, you had the internal fear of being ridiculed for your appearance. Sanji noticed this immediately when you first joined and tried to convince you in his own way that you are beautiful but you were stubborn you didn’t want to hear it.

You shunned many people in your life due to this, took a very long time for you to even wear more comfortable clothing exposing your features, your skin. You often wore big hoodies or huge clothing in general. The girls welcomed you in with open arms and day by day they helped you get over this doubt you have in yourself.

Today wasnt a good day though. You just came back on the ship, legs exhausted from running, hair in a tangles mess from running into some bushes, you were covered in dirty and blood, not sure if it was yours or that man you kicked around.

“Oh! Y/N! Y/N! My love?!” Sanji ran over to you in a panic immediately holding your weakened body. “What happened who did this?!”

You shook your head it was too embarrassing to even think about, “I just need to sleep.”

“N-no you cant your head!” Sanj took out a napkin from his jacket and placed it on your bleeding forehead. Thats probably why you felt so tired. He walked you back to his room where he had a small couch for you to lay on his lap. He had a small first aid kit to help you since Chopper was gone with everybody else.

Sanji was furious on who could have possibly done this to you. He bit his tongue as you groaned in pain.

“I thought you were with the girls?” He asked taking the leaves stuck in your hair.

“I wanted to be by myself for a moment..that’s all…and then I encountered some assholes…doesn’t matter though…apparently my kind isn’t welcomed here.”

“Y/N—“

“Sanji.”

Sanji’s been very aware of the treatment you’ve gotten in the past by ignorant people when you all were in public. If you all weren’t being chased or fighting every once in a while you and you alone would get stared and not so loud whispers about how

“Different“ you were from Nami and Robin.

Sanji never understood it, Never understood how someone can look at a person’s skin or race or culture or features and be so hateful? What have you done to deserve such treatment?

Nothing. You didn’t deserve it.

Sanji cleaned you up in silence, but it was killing him not to speak his mind to you, “Here…” He sat up and got in front of you to take out anything else from your hair. “Gatta make sure I get all of it.”

Your eyes felt like they were burning as you fiddled with your thumbs. Fighting back the urge to cry, Your chest felt heavy. You were tired and ready to shin everything and body from you after he was done. They’re all the same. Nothing will ever change with how people treat you.

Like clock work Sanji looked down to see a tear fall on your fist. Before you could wipe it off he gently moved his finger under to ur chin so you can look up at him. It was like his heart sank seeing you so broken in the eyes.

“Y/N…”

Without anymore words exchanged he grabbed you into a soft embrace. Your face was buried in his shoulder finally breathing out the tears you needed to release. It was painful to him to hear you like this. He wish he would have been there those assholes would never had a chance to hurt you. His head started to pound from the frustration, so many what if’s. What if they done worse? What if they took you? What if he just could have been there?

Your cries dies down and the sounds were replaced with Sanji’s quickened heart beat. You felt maybe because he is holding you—a woman— he’s probably trying to not bleed all over you. Rolling your eyes at the thought you pulled back and was greeted to him instead with his glossy eyes.

“You’re so Beautiful Y/N…” He spoke out searching your eyes, “you are. I’m more than sorry this happened to you. ….I’m sorry this has been going on for so long . I’m sorry you haven’t been treated the way you needed. I’m sorry you couldn’t come to me when you feel anything less than perfect, I’m sorry for not reminding you enough how stunning you are, how worth of a life you are, how….”

“I’m sorry for not loving you enough.”

You blinked. It was so much emotion poured into what saying was professing to you, you couldn’t process it all you just looked away embarrassingly not wanting to believe him.

“You don’t mean —-“

“It’s more than a belief Y/N It’s a fact. “ Sanji wiped your tear stained cheek. He needed you to understand who you really are, and how much you meant to him. “I promise. To this day Y/N. I won’t ever allow any asshole to make you hate who you are. Your skin is just how God intended it to be and its so Heavenly.”

“You don’t ever feel like you need to apologize or feel animosity about this beautiful body you’re in. Because I love it.”

He kissed your hands looking into your eyes. It wasn’t the same how he usually does it, full of indescribable lust, but it was lawful. It was real.

It made you feel shy quite actually.

“I love you.”

You cried a little chuckling at the floor. You didn’t have much to say back because you were still fighting in your mind if you believe him or not.

“I love you, Too Sanji.”

His smile was also a sign of relief, in the back of his mind he felt like he maybe over stepped his boundary with you, but you welcomed him. You welcomed his compliments.

You took a bath Sanji drew for you and he went to your room to clean up a bit and fix you your favorite dinner. As you were relaxing the cook had some spare time after making your meal, the girls came back and told Sanji about what happened and the men that harassed you.

Needless to say during that time Sanji went out for a smoke break to handle some business.

#one piece #one piece headcanons #black reader #TimikosSanji #one piece x female reader #sanji #sanjionepiece #sanji imagine #sanji x black reader #sanji x reader #one piece x black!reader #black foot sanji #one piece scenario #x female reader #anime x black!reader

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jpmarvel90 · 1 year

Text

Stunts

Masterlist Scarlett Masterlist

Word Count: 3136

Relationship: Scarlett x Reader

Summary: Y/n just doesn't seem to have any luck when she carries out stunts!

Y/N’s POV:

There was a time when I was ready to give everything up. I was tired trying to fight my way to becoming an actress. After endless rejection I thought I wasn’t meant for that world. But it was at that moment, when I had all but given up, that I got a part. The part which would start me on a path I never expected.

That role was a small part as an Agent of S.H.E.I.L.D in the Avengers. Little did I know that it would lead me to meet my future wife and gaining my big break. I can still remember the day I first met wife. We were filming a scene where we were fighting after my character had been affected by the tesseract. Due to her scheduling, we hadn’t had a chance to practice with each other. Instead doing rehearsals with our own stunt co-ordinators. This was my favourite part of filming, the stunts. I loved the intense fight scenes and this one with Natasha was one of the best.

On the day we were set to film I was on set early with my stunt co-ordinator running through the fight scene, so it was fresh in my head. As we finished our final set up, I felt a pair of eyes on me. I turned around to grab my water when I see none other than Scarlett Johansson looking at me.

I smile and walk over, stretching out my hand in greeting. “Good Morning Ms Johansson, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Y/N and I’ll be the person whose ass you’re kicking today.” I laughed, internally kicking myself at my awkwardness. She just laughed taking my hand and giving it a firm shake. “It’s nice to meet you too Y/N. But please call me Scarlett. Your form is looking good.” She says pointing in the direction of the set.

“Uh, thanks. It’s my first job and I just want it all to be perfect.” I smile in return. We get caught in each other’s eyes briefly. Our intense stare is interrupted by the director, Joss, coming over to get started. “Ah ladies, I see you’re here and ready to get going. I think it would be good to run through the fight sequence a couple of times before we start to film.”

I notice a smirk on Scarlett’s lips before I tear my eyes away to engage with Joss. “Sounds good to me.” I respond before taking my place on set. We go through the sequence a couple of times and you’d have thought we had spent our training together with the ease we found in carrying out the moves. Perfectly choreographed. Each time I ended up on my back which Scarlett found very amusing.

Once Joss is happy, we take our positions to do our first take. It goes perfectly once again. We reset to capture a different angel. As we begin to fight, I notice that our positioning seems off. I’m too close to Scarlett and before I had time to readjust, I’ve clocked a fist right to my nose. The surprise catches me off balance and I fall backwards, my head hitting the concrete floor, hard.

There’s a stunned silence as I lay on the floor, my ears ringing. “Fuck, oh my God, Y/N are you ok? I’m so sorry.” Scarlett shouts as she runs to my side, kneeling taking my hand in hers. I groan trying to sit up. “No Y/N stay still, can we get a medic over here please?” Joss calls out.

“I’m fine, it’s just a bang to the head.” But Scarlett gives me a stern look making sure I stay down. “You’re not fine Y/N, you’re bleeding.” It’s not until that moment I notice the feel of something wet down my face. I can see the look of concern in Scarlett’s eyes and I instantly feel guilty. Which is ridiculous as I was the one that had just got punched, but I still felt bad.

“You know I’m not actually infected by the tesseract, you didn’t actually need to punch it out of me.” I laughed causing her to let a small chuckle slip. “That’s not funny Y/N, you could have gotten hurt.” She responds. I give her hand a tight squeeze to let her know everything is ok as the medic runs over to check me out.

After being given the all clear and an ice pack, Scarlett helps pull me to my feet. “See I told you, it’s all good.” I smiled as she wrapped her arm around me to help walk me off set. “That’s really not necessary Scarlett, I can walk perfectly fine on my own.” I smile down at her as I hold the ice pack to my nose. “Well, you can prove you’re fine by letting me take you to rest in my trailer…. And then perhaps dinner to make up for punching you in the face?”

I laughed before realising that she was being serious. “You really don’t have to do that.” I responded, getting slightly awkward. “I know I don’t have to Y/N, but I want to.” We stop outside her trailer as she looks at me in anticipation for my answer. “Ok, I’d like that. But can we give it a few days so this swelling goes down, I want to look good for our date.” I flirted.

��Who said it was going to be a date?” Scarlett asked nervously. “Who said it wasn’t?” I retorted, no idea where this confidence has come from. She smirks at me whilst nudging me up the stairs to her trailer. “Come on then, rest up. I don’t want you concussed for our date either”. And that was the start of how I met my beautiful wife.

6 years later and we’re back on set filming for the latest Avengers movie. My role had grown, and I was now part of the growing Avengers team. I was in my trailer getting into costume when the door opened, and I felt two arms wrap around my waist.

“They really need to let you take this outfit home. Your ass looks incredible in it.” Scarlett whispered into my ear whilst placing feather like kisses to my neck, rubbing her hands over my stomach. I let out a slight moan as she grabbed my ass playfully before spinning me around and pinning me against the wall. “Well, someone’s horny today, aren’t they?” I teased as her green eyes stared straight into my soul.

“Oh, just shut up and kiss me, I’m allowed to be horny for me sexy wife.” She responded placing her hands around my neck. I pull her in gently and give her a sweet and passionate kiss. She clearly wanted more as she deepens the kiss, trying to take control. I wrap my arms around her waist pulling her closer to me before we’re interrupted by a knock at my trailer door. “Miss Y/L/N, you’re needed on set.”

Scarlett groans and pulls away, placing her hand on my cheek rubbing it softly. “We can carry this on when we get home later.” I say seductively as I kiss her once more. I turn to walk away but not before giving her ass a squeeze causing an expected grunt to leave her lips. As I’m walking down the stairs, I hear my frustrated wife call after me. “Seriously Y/N, you can’t leave me like that!” I chuckle before running over to set.

Today we’re filming a big stunt scene which I’ve been so excited to film. My character is trapped in a building as it explodes. The stunt involves me running through a hallway before taking a leap through a window as the building behind me explodes. Of course, the main part of the explosion will be added in after but there is due to be some small explosions to add to the effect. With the stunt co-ordinator and director, we go over once more what they are looking for from the scene.

I feel slight nerves, but I love doing my own stunts. I try to do as many as I can, and this is probably the most advanced one I’ve done yet. Though in the grand scheme of things, I literally just have to run through a fake glass window and leap. The rest is all up to the stunt gear.

Whilst I’m getting in my harness, I see Scarlett walk over and take a seat in my chair. She wasn’t needed on set today, but we often came to support the other. Seeing her there calmed me and I gave her a goofy smile and a thumbs up before climbing the structure to my mark.

It was high up here. I walked the route before taking a glance over the edge. I take some deep breaths and get in place to start. “It’s simple, it’s just running.” I say to myself as I get ready for action. “Ok Y/N are you ready?” I hear over the megaphone below. I give a thumbs up as the director calls action.

The early parts of the explosion begin, and I start my run, I get to a sprint, knowing it’s going to take a bit of speed to get through the glass. I dodge the falling debris as planned and turn my shoulder into the window as I leap. I hear the last of the explosions as I fall, the wind blowing through my hair.

Suddenly my body jolts and I notice that one of the wires has snapped from the intensity of the explosion. Before I even have time to prepare, my body impacts the floor hard. Even with the crash mats there, I knew this was bad. My hearing was off, and I could only hear mumbles as I tried to move and keep my eyes open. It was only seconds before I faded into the darkness.

Scarlett’s POV:

I huffed as Y/N ran out of her trailer, leaving me stood there a horny mess. I loved that she still had this affect on me. I always felt like we were still those two younger versions of ourselves when we were dating. I still got butterflies and got lost in her gaze as if we had only just found love.

After I composed myself, I locked up her trailer and made my way to set to watch my wife in action. I greeted the team as I arrived and took my place in Y/N’s chair, pulling my sunglasses down. I watch as Y/N is fitted in her harness, not able to stop staring at her in her skin-tight suit. She caught me looking her way and gave me her usual crooked grin and thumbs up.

As she started to climb to her position, I felt nervous. She always did as many stunts as she could, it was her favourite part of the job. But it always caused me to get a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach, worried something may happen to her. I push these thoughts down as I see the excitement she has, ready to enjoy the scene.

The director calls action and the set falls quiet in anticipation for the big stunt. The first explosions causes me to jump in surprise. At this point I can’t see Y/N, she’s 30 feet up running from those explosions inside the makeshift building. My heart rate increases whilst I wait to see my wife jump out of a building due to explode.

Moments later I see her silhouette approach the glass window before breaking through and starting her controlled decent. But mid fall one of the zip wires snaps sending my wife’s body crashing to the floor with a bang. My heart stops as I shoot up from my seat running over to her limp body.

“Oh God, Y/N are you ok?” I call out in panic as I run over pushing people out of my way. Kneeling down next to her I’m scared to touch her. “Call an ambulance she’s not moving and there’s blood.” I call out trying to hold back my tears. Examining her body, I can see that she has clearly broken her leg and has cut open her head.

Thankfully she’s breathing so I gently take her hand. “Hey, babe can you hear me? Everything’s going to be ok. I’m right here.” I think I’m trying to convince myself whilst I carefully rub my thumb across the back of her hand.

“urgh, what happened?” My eyes shoot up to see Y/N start to wake. “Oh, thank God you’re awake. You fell when the support wire snapped.” I rush out still concerned. “Owww, fuck my leg.” The pain clearly is starting to kick in as she becomes more aware of what happened. “It’s ok babe, I know you’re in pain, but just stay still ok. Help is on the way.” She just nods. I can tell she’s trying to hide her pain to not concern me as much.

The ambulance finally arrived and took her off to the hospital. I called Sebastian Stan, Y/N’s brother to let him know what happened. Him and Lizzie Olsen both met me at the hospital after grabbing some of Y/N things. “Scarlett, hey, how is she?” Stan asked greeting me in a hug. “She’s in surgery at the moment to fix her leg and she’s got a pretty nasty concussion, but she’ll be fine.” He nodded in acknowledgement and sat down.

“How are you?” Lizzie asked giving me a suspicious look before pulling my arm to sit me down. “I’m ok I guess, well as good as I can be after watching my wife fall to what I thought was her death” I exclaimed. I sigh whilst running my hands through my hair. “But she’s ok and that’s all that matters.”

We waited for a few hours before being notified that Y/N was out of surgery and soon to be waking up. “You go in, we’ll wait out here.” Seb said, giving me a quick hug. I smile to Lizzie and take a breath before entering. I see her body led in bed, her head bandaged up and her leg in a cast. I pull up the chair next to her bed and place a kiss on her forehead before running my hand through her hair.

She started to stir and instantly a smile appeared on her face as she looked at me. “Hey baby” she whispered in a raspy voice. “Y/N, you’re awake, how are you feeling?” I ask rubbing my hand up and down her arm. “Uh tired and sore. Could you pass me some water please?” She responded. I quickly poured her a glass of water and helped her drink it. “Better?” I asked, to which she nodded.

“You scared me. When I saw you fall through the air and then land on the floor unconscious, I thought I had lost you.” I say, my voice starting to crack and tears filling my eyes. She reached up and rubbed her hand on my cheek. “It’s ok love, I’m going to be fine. I love you.” I smile at her words through my tears and lean over to plant a soft kiss on her lips. “I’m going to have to take a rain check on what I promised you tonight though. Unless you want to do it in a hospital bed?” She joked whilst wiggling her eyebrows.

I gave her a slap to the shoulder as she started to laugh. “Ow, haven’t I been hurt enough today?” I roll my eyes at her playful nature. I sit there for a moment, just taking in my beautiful wife. “Um, babe…” I asked with a serious tone. She looks at me and takes my hand, sensing the change in tone. “Yes love?”

“Will you maybe think about reducing the stunts you do? I know you love them, but I feel like I have a mini heart attack each time you do them and today I almost lost you.” I know it was a lot to ask, I would never normally ask her to stop doing something she loves, but I just don’t know if I can take it anymore.

Before she answers she starts to move over in her bed, and I can see her wince. “Uh what are you doing? You’re going to hurt yourself!” I say jumping up in concern. “I want my wife to lie with me in bed. Here.” She said tapping the space beside her. I hesitated but eventually climbed in next to her, being careful to not hurt her. She placed her arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer.

“Scar, you know that I love doing stunts, it’s what makes me love my job. But, if it’ll make you happy and stop you worrying, I can stop doing the bigger ones. To be honest, I’m not sure I’ll be comfortable doing anything like I did today for a while.” I looked up at her bruised face to see she was smiling down on me. “Thanks babe. I don’t want to stop you doing something you love, but I just don’t want you getting hurt.” I snuggle in to her more, craving her warmth and touch.

“I know you wouldn’t. It’s ok. I’m not just making this decision for you.” There’s a pause before she talks again. “Do I have to stop the fighting scenes as well considering I got hurt doing those too? Or just not do any with you…..” I feel her chest rise up and down as she chuckles to herself. “Hey, that was 6 years ago! And if I didn’t punch you in the face we probably never would have gone on that date. So, I actually did you a favour.” I argue back. Her hand draped over my shoulder moves down to my side and gives it a quick pinch causing me to squirm. “Well, I guess you did knock me off my feet…” She says causing us both to burst out laughing.

I can see her eyes start to get tired and I encourage her to sleep. “I’ll be here when you wake up. I’m not going anywhere babe. You’re stuck with me.” I switch our positions so she is led in my arms with her head on my chest. “I love you Scar.” She whispers as sleep starts to take over. “I love you more Y/N.” Just as she’s falling asleep, I hear a whisper. “Not possible.” I tighten my grasp around her. My love for this woman just continues to grow. I’m so lucky that I get to call her mine. I fall asleep that night with a smile on my face and my perfect wife in my arms.

#scarlett johansson fanfiction #scarlett johansson x y/n #scarlett johansson x reader #scarlett johansson #celebrity fanfic

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nescaveckwriter · 2 months

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Bundled, Broken Maybe Healed (Part 2)

Prompt: Bundled up in blankets - will be in bold,😱

A/N: YAY! My third one for @badthingshappenbingo 🤭, Okay y'all, this chapter is intense, I'm not kidding.. we find more out about Meredith's past and its traumatic okay... So good luck...😱💓❤️

Warnings: 18+ Only! Some language, blood and gore, normal Criminal Minds stuff, going into depth off crime scenes etc, drug use,torture, anything else I missed let me know💕

Characters: Aaron Hotchner, Dr. Spencer Reid, Penelope Garcia, Derek Morgan, JJ, Emily Prentiss, Meredith Lang.

Cover: Created by me. Also images from Pinterest and Canva.

Words:3000ish 😅

Chapter Name: Bundled, Broken, Maybe Healed? (Part one) (part two) (Part three)

something, the pinch between my toes was horrible, but the pain didn’t last long, no! I saw these little bits of spiders coming from everywhere, I tried my best to smash them but I couldn’t due restraints, it was scary, the spiders I mean, I never was a fan, I’m not sure how long it lasted, but it felt like I wanted to crawl, get out of my skin, out of my body. So when my first high came down I was back in the cage, watching how he would drug Hope,’ she paused, looked at me and said ‘no! He , Never did touch us, you know… I guess we could be thankful, this was clearly not a sexual thing, more sadistic, he got off on our fear.’ I looked at her, this teenager who went through something horrible, and I realised that she is one intelligent human being, she profilled this man, without any experience, so she looked at me “you know, what one day, I will find Hope, and I will find the collector and I put him behind bars, make him suffer the way we did.’ I knew right then and there I needed to call Jason Gideon, maybe her healing journey starts with justice. And as the days passed and she spoke, of her time, that everyday he’d do it over and over again, how he broke in the girls, to listen too him, too obey him, every order, he’’l train them like dogs, to fight each other, and how she did not participate in it, she’ll let the others beat her up, even Hope in the end started to beat her up, but that day she broke down, she sobbed, not because she felt the pain of her best friend turning on her, no, but because she couldn’t save her, she couldn’t stop him, from brain washing her, from ruining her, she looked me and my heart shattered, her words tore through me ‘if only I could help Hope be strong enough, he would’ve thrown her out just like me, I tried, I tried to talk to her, to make her strong, but nothing work’ she clenched her fist, ‘The collector got rid of me,because of not listening I was bad for his business, no one wanted buy me, hell I don’t even think he advertised, but he tried to make me fear him,, and internally I did, but I didn’t show it, he would starve me for, days, I felt weak, at first but after a while, numb… so one day he pumped me full of drugs, and I remember thinking, this is it, finally I’ll overdose and this nightmare will be over, till today I remember feeling, cold like really cold, and I wrapped myself in blankets and it didn’t help, by now I was so used to seeing the spiders, that I would talk to them, I knew they weren’t real, but to me, they we the only familiarity that I had, so I felt comfortable with, them.’ she gave a humorless laugh ‘Now, I’m probably never getting out of here doc am I?’ I smiled and told her that I understood, but really how could I? I have a feeling she deliberately skips parts, that’s too painful to tell over, or she’s afraid that she’ll scare someone, she is highly sensitive but she doesn’t show it, she hates feeling vulnerable, the moment she’ll feel scared she lash out, but at the same time she’ll care about the people around. She trusts no one, in one of our sessions she disclosed that she doesn’t even trust her parents. Sometimes I try to press that subject, but she’ll ignore it, saying ‘one time thing doc’ and start talking about something different.

#bad things happen bingo #finding hope #nescveckwriter #criminal minds fic #aaron hotchner #jason gideon #Spotify

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nightghoul381 · 1 year

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HeYYooo! I'm so happy you reached 100 followers!!! (Insert party popers emojis because I'm on PC) I would love to have Harrison with the injury prompt (The reader being injured) in Harrison's POV. I hope you have a good day (Or night), and again congrats!!!

Thank you so much for the request! I love writing from the suitor's POV and this was a great way to explore Harrison's personality and inner monologue. I hope you enjoy it!

At Fault

Pairing: Harrison Gray (POV) x Reader Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort WC: ~1.3 C/W: Mentions of blood and critical injury

This wasn’t supposed to happen. It was supposed to be me. They were aiming at me. Me!

I slam my fists on the wood of the wall outside your hospital room. You were in there fighting for your life because I was too stupid to see you coming until it was too late.

—Bang!

The moment keeps replaying in my mind in slow motion. You jumping in front of me as the silver bullet hurtled toward me. The second the metal pierces your delicate skin of your chest. The spurt of crimson blossoming in stark contrast to the white of your blouse. The way your eyes rolled back in your head as your body slumped to the ground.

Vivid images flash through my mind in a torturous torrent, leaving me trembling.

“Harry—” Liam’s cautious approach seemed to be drowned by a thick curtain of water, so very distant and gentle. It never would have made sense to anyone else. They didn’t understand how gut-wrenchingly guilty this entire situation was making me feel. I was supposed to know he was going to shoot.

I can’t believe I didn’t pay close enough attention. I can’t believe I let myself get distracted. And now you’re paying the price. You were lying there, critically injured because of my incompetence.

I shoot a glare at Liam, trying to keep my rage in check. The startled look in his fuchsia gaze is almost painful to see. I know it’s not his fault, I know that taking my internal hatred out on him will do nothing but make me feel even more guilty later.

I try to keep a lid on my emotions. I’ve prided myself on keeping a level-head in the most heated situations, but now I don’t think I can force myself to hold back anymore. I’m drowning in the sea of pain and rage and sorrow and fear.

Liam moves just a bit closer, hand ruffling his pink hair in apprehension. He can tell. Of course, he can tell. He’s known me better than anyone else in Crown and I know I can’t truly hide anything from him.

“—we should go to another room,” Liam offers gently, holding out a hand to me. “I stole a bottle of whiskey from Roger so let’s go knock back a couple of drinks.”

It was a lie. I didn’t even need to use my ability to know that. There was no way Roger would let his alcohol go without a fight, but even still, I appreciate the sentiment and solemnly follow Liam into the other room.

“You want to talk about it?” Liam asks hesitantly, handing a small glass to me. I take the drink and swirl it around in my hand, but set it down on the table in front of me. I slump down onto the couch, shoulders hunched and head hanging.

“It’s my fault Liam. It’s completely my fault that she got shot and I don’t know how to handle it.”

The admission causes hot tears to prick at my eyes. God, I haven’t cried in so long, it feels so wrong.

“The guy said he wasn’t gonna shoot if I backed down. I wasn’t paying close enough attention. I should have seen that he was lying. That’s my entire job and I failed at that. And now she’s paying for my idiocy.”

“Harry you wouldn’t have been able to stop her, even if you had known he was going to shoot. Knowing her, she’d already made up her mind to protect you, regardless of if you knew he was telling the truth or not.”

Liam’s words cut into me like a red-hot knife. I want to keel over. It’s so much easier blaming myself. It makes so much more sense to blame myself. Surely you weren’t foolish enough to put yourself in danger just because of me.

I wanted to keep telling myself it was a mistake. My mistake. I know it’s not true, but I want it to be. I want it to be true so badly I’d been repeating it to myself like it was a mantra.

“I just need her to be okay…” My voice cracks on the last word and I wince at how weak I sound.

Liam places his hand on my shoulder, a sign of support. He knew me well enough to know that words weren’t going to do much of anything to help ease the painful ache in my heart.

Just a short moment later William entered the room a soft smile on his face. I jumped to my feet as he approached me, anxiety causing every nerve to burn while I awaited his news.

“They were able to remove the bullet. It seems that she was quite lucky. The bullet had managed to lodge in one of her ribs, and this was enough to prevent any vital organs from being hit. She’s going to be extremely sore for a few weeks, but she’ll be okay.”

I felt an overwhelming rush of relief wash over me and the strength seemed to vanish from my legs, sending me to my knees.

I felt so light headed and dizzy, I couldn’t even move.

She’ll be okay.

The words kept cycling through my mind and I didn’t hear Will continuing to talk. Liam crouched down and shook my arm.

“Did you hear him? He said she woke up. She’s asking after you. She wants to see you and know you’re alright,” Liam murmured gently. The obvious love and care glistening in his pink irises warmed me and I was finally able to regain my composure. I nodded, unsure if I would be able to form any coherent words.

Liam bounced up, offering me a hand, and helping me to my feet. Together we made our way down the hall back outside your room. Pushing through the door, I saw you reclined on the bed, a tired smile gracing your features as our eyes met.

Once again the relief I felt knowing you were okay seems to sap the strength from my legs and I shakily stepped over to you, dropping to my knees at the side of the bed. I grab one of your hands in mine and pressed a kiss against it, a tear managing to escape and roll down my cheek.

“Harry. I’m so glad you’re okay,” you smile, voice shallow and raspy.

“Shhh, sweetheart. You shouldn’t be worrying about me. I love you, I’m so incredibly relieved that you’re alright,” My words come out in a choked whisper as another tear falls from my eyes.

I have so many things I want to say. I want to scold you for being so reckless with your life. I want to thank you for saving mine. I want to tell you how lost I felt at the thought of never seeing you again. I wanted to make sure you knew how much I love you.

But my throat was too tight. Too choked with emotion to allow any verbal expression. I pushed myself up, curling onto the bed beside you and pressing the softest of kisses to your hair. Your scent filled my nostrils, calming my racing heart.

You were safe. I closed my eyes and allowed myself to finally relax. As the tension left my body, so too did my energy. I heard a soft huff of a laugh and the comforting touch of your hand filled me with so much warmth.

“I love you Harry,” you whisper. The sound of your quiet breathing is the last thing I hear as my mind fades away and sleep overtakes me.

Taglist: @aquagirl1978, @themiscarnival @abundance-pathchooser @candied-boys

Feel free to message me if you'd like to be added to the tag list!

#100 follower event #ikevil #ikemen villains #ikevil harrison #ikemen villains harrison #ikemen villains fanfiction #ikevil fanfic #harrison gray

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methylphenidate-already-taken · 1 year

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Vore thoughts? I gotchu. Since you’re evactyating wildfires, What’re your thoughts on fire rescue preds? Or general vore scenarios involving fire.

I imagine a belly would be a great place to hide a prey from all that smoke, fire, and building collapse.

-Squish

SQUISH MY LOVE

I’m writing something about that for a friend right now actually to keep myself occupied. I’ve always struggled with rescuing prey from heat by swallowing them, it would be awful at first. The internal body temperature would be suffocating.

Until the humidity finally soothed their smoke ravaged lungs.

Their whole family or friend group are with them safe in this pred’s gut. Their passengers can hear them panting as they get out of there. They’re safe. They’ve lost everything, but thank god, they have eachother. They’re with someone who trained hard for this.

And the pred drops them off, leaving them coated in stomach juice and saliva and running back to help another party that’s trapped. They prey find themselves wishing they could have stayed with their saviour instead of seeing the catastrophe in the distance.

If prey are hurt, the pred delicately but quickly swallow them which is a huge challenge.

And this effort takes several days. Weeks. Even months. To fight fires to this extent. There’s a lot of rotation. That’s why, finally when it’s in check, After all that time the pred keeps their last saved group with them, falling to the ground and throwing their fists in the air with sweet relief.

I also really like the idea of aquatic preds swallowing their prey who have jumped into bodies of water to escape the flames. They won’t be able to tread water until rescue comes. The pred has to save them *now*

#heheheheheh asks #safe vore #soft vore #vore talk #extreme cuddling #vore prompts #endo #safe noms

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venomous-qwille · 2 years

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Hullo, uh, for the ask mayhaps "I'm just glad you're okay" ... Sun-centic (⁠*⁠´⁠ω⁠｀⁠*⁠) i am in-love with your Astral Bodies story 💖

I most certainly can do :) I'm glad you're enjoying Astral Bodies- here is a drabble that fits in the same universe. Thanks for the ask (I'mma big fan of your art!! <3)

"I'm just glad you're okay" Sun / Reader Words: 858

When you slam back into consciousness you are lying supine on the floor. Your legs are raised, resting on the slope of something hard and your skin goose-pimples where it meets cold, silky fabric.

You blink and above you Sun’s face crumples with relief.

“There you are, Starshine.” He says softly, as if you are some skittish wild animal he might somehow frighten away.

“Mmsunny-“ you slur, eyes squinting against the ceiling lights “m’head hurts.”

He lowers a palm to cover your eyes, ever so gently, and you watch his face as it disappears beneath the horizon of his hand. His fingers are cool and soft and you let out a blissful whimper as the aching in your head subsides.

“You took quite a tumble there, Starshine,” his voice is light as he smooths a thumb over your temple, “You had us very worried for a second.”

There is no reprimand there but you can’t help but cringe away from him, shrugging away from his touch like a burn. Your eyes dart up to him, still frozen with his arm outstretched. You move to drag your legs off his lap but-

He stops you.

It takes so little effort on his part, just a single motion. His arms reach out to grip your thighs firmly; that same kind of careful, certain pressure you’d use to hold a cat at the vet. You fight the animal urge to writhe and spit in embarrassment, a red hot flush rising up your neck- but you know he can see it all on your face anyway. Sun had always been very good at reading you.

“Don’t move yet.” He slides you forward until you’re back over his lap, ankles draped against his other arm. “You need to keep your legs elevated while you recover.”

You unclench your fingers where they’ve formed fists against the floor and he tilts his faceplate down to look at you, casting a shadow over his features. The low light lets his pupils dance like fireflies across your face. You shiver.

“I’m sorry Sun-“ you begin, shuffling your body like a caterpillar as you rise to rest your weight on your elbows. His smile ticks in frustration.

“Lie down, darling.”

You give him a long look, which he returns flatly. You know when you are beat. With a long suffering sigh you lower yourself back to the floor and you can feel something tightening behind your eyes. You take a deep breath-

“I mean it.” You swallow. “I’m sorry.”

Sun tuts lightly but doesn’t say anything. You shut your eyes.

“I mean it Sun. I knew I was in no state to practice today- but I…” you furrow a brow and bring your hands up to grip the sweaty mess of your hair, “…I was angry, and so sick of people telling me what to do and I feel like everything is falling apart and I just wanted to dance it out you know? I needed to. Stupid. I know. Such a stupid thing to get sick over. This whole thing is my fault I-”

He smooths a thumb over the flesh of your hamstring, shushing you gently. “Oh Starshine, it’s not-“

“No but it is Sun. It is and I’m sorry. I should have listened to you. I knew I wasn’t feeling 100% when I woke up today- I shouldn’t have pushed the boat out so far- and you told me- you all but begged me not to work myself too hard- but I was just-“ your voice quavers and you bury your face into your hands, vision swollen with little black spots that fade like drops of ink in water.

There is a rustle of fabric and in one dizzying shift you find yourself scooped up into his arms. His chassis is hard and soft at the same time- that always surprises you, the singularly unique feeling of silicone over steel. Your cheek is pressed against his chest and you can feel the low tick-tick-hummm of his internals vibrate against your skin. You hide your face against it.

“None of that now, sweetheart. None of that.” He tips his face forward to touch the crescent of his mouth to your temple. “No blame, no fault, no tears, none of that.”

His kindness only makes it worse. You need him to understand and you almost choke on the words as they bubble out your throat “-I’m sorry- I didn’t mean to frighten you, passing out like that- I didn’t think-”

He exhales a hiss of soft static against your hairline. “You will take better care of yourself next time won’t you?”

“I promise Sunny, I-”

He boops you on the nose.

“Then there is nothing to forgive, Starshine. I’m just glad you’re okay.”

It’s as if some invisible thread has been cut; all the tension rushes from your body and you feel yourself relax into his arms. You thread your fingers into the fabric at his neck.

“Sunny I…”

“Hmmm?” He hums at you, the sound muffled by your hair. His arm around your back twitches, just a little, just once.

You close your eyes.

“…Thank you.”

#asks #prompts #astral bodies #dca fandom #fnaf sundrop #fnaf sun #sun x reader #drabbles #this was so much fun to work on thankyou <3 #fainting #tw passing out #qwillewrites

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nosafeharbour · 1 year

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Pandæmonium: Anabaseios thoughts/reactions

Hoo, boy... I have so many thoughts and emotions that I need to untangle here. I wrote up some initial reactions as I played, but I'm glad I slept on it and went back through my screenshots to mull them over.

I liked it. I think it's one of the strongest raid tiers in story and set pieces both. Do I like it over Abyssos? I can't say, I'll have to see how I feel in the future. Last night I felt a lot more conflicted over it, than I do today! Letting it sit in my mind was a good thing.

My Abyssos thoughts are here, if curious!

The first fight was so cool! Loved the voice acting, and the memories/souls... especially the mage, who was giving me Mhachi mage vibes. I want to make them into an OC... the martialist and just, a Behemoth, were also very neat

[blows up myself up with my mind]

He did the italicised you... my favourite...

Lahabrea and Erichthonios hanging out with us so casually in the Aitiascope is very charming... especially the researchers cowering away. I can’t believe these are some of the only two people alive outside of the Scions to have ever seen an Ancient

You’re scaring the hoes

When I tell you that I started quaking and did not stop until I finished the tier. The incredibly stormy maelstrom of feelings over “I’m getting the thing I wanted, but I don’t know how it’s gonna go or make me feel yet”

Oh, the places we shall see! The sad faces we shall make! God, she’s really going through it

This area was gorgeous... I love it when they put my monochrome WoL in monochrome spaces. The hand and eye motifs here were stunning

The Pandæmonium fight itself was SO cool... the voice acting and mechanics were really fun. This is probably the fight (asides from P12S P2) that I’m the most curious to see in Savage

[nervous shrieking laughter]

ABSOLUTELY adore this. I was really hoping it was going to be what the Heart of Sabik looked like, or representative of it, in a way.

[shoving my entire fist in my mouth]

Gaius mention... while Lahacred is on screen... nodding, smiling

The slow zoom as they silently stared at each other... pretty sure Lahabrea knows that Albi could confirm his suspicions, but neither of them want to say anything.

I quite like the framing of this memory of Lahabrea - we’re picking up where we left off after knowing him in Abyssos, a “version” of him from closer to the Final Days, but with the context of nothing he learns or experiences here having any impact on the “real” Lahabrea that we meet later on. We get the character set piece, without any longlasting character growth. He gets to learn about his future self, but not in a way that impacts that future. For the WoL, it’s such an interesting mix. A man discovering his future horrors. But WoL is reluctant to say anything, so it’s a very stubborn game of chess.

It’s from here on, with the real and grounded Heart of Sabik lore, that my thoughts get much more complicated! Not in a bad way, I’m just overwhelmed.

It is interesting that it does, ultimately, all stem back to the High Seraph. I have/had a complicated view of the Ivalice raids... even as somebody who loves FF Tactics, I felt at the time that they felt too much like transplanting FFT/XII lore into FFXIV in a way that didn’t feel as smooth and natural as other homages. I didn’t enjoy Ivalice until The Orbonne Monastery, and Bozja, the latter of which did the most for soothing those feelings... The implication that the Heart of Sabik was auracite that stemmed from the High Seraph, I wasn’t sure how I felt about it. I’m still not sure how I feel about it! At the very least, I can really respect them holding fast to their own internal lore. Ivalice isn’t any less important or major, for being a piece of side content.

Equally interesting that the reason Azys Lla was involved, specifically the Aetherochemical Research Facility, was because Lahabrea was still carrying the Heart of Sabik with him until the day he died. The memories of Athena still within it, called out to the shard of Erichthonios... I had hoped that there was going to be some further connection to “our” Lahabrea and where he seemingly died there, but I guess he truly did die. Again, respect holding fast to their lore!

So Ultima, as a spell and a concept in all of it’s forms from Ivalice, to Pandæmonium, and finally to the Ultima Weapon and Werlyt, does truly originate from Ultima, the High Seraph. But the Heart of Sabik itself, has the most major ties to Athena. I’ll put my more specific thoughts on Ultima at the end.

bbbbbbbbbb

Oh my god... they did it... I really love Elidibus a lot (in a “sleeper agent” way where I don’t think about him much until he’s on screen in front of me, but he is the other Ascian other than Lahabrea that really had me invested and hanging onto the Ancients plot) but I’m so, so glad for the Elidibus fans. To get to see his true form, and for it to really lean into the blind justice themes, it’s so good. I’m emotional

And the arena... this truly is the original meeting hall/chambers for the Convocation, is it not? The way it directly mirrors the meeting space the Ascians use in the Rift is amazing. The light pouring in through the windows, the views of Amaurot outside of them... amazing. The sigil on the banners surrounding the hall is Lahabrea’s, so I wonder if this is the Speaker’s hall, in some manner?

P11 itself made me tear up randomly during the fight, lmao, I don’t remember the last time that happened... maybe the Werlyt trials, or Endsinger... the music hitting crescendos, seeing attack names that so closely catered to Elidibus lovers, and the feelings of this being the truly last chapter to the Ascians/Ancients... it got to me.

Ahh... so I have complex feelings about Albi ever using/giving her aether out like this, even when the WoL does it fairly often. After her incident at The Ghimlyt Dark in 4.5, she hasn’t been able to control her aether in a manner she could offer it to others, and even since recovering enough to return to the mantle of Black Mage, it’s still something that she’d pause before doing.

But this moment felt right. It reminded me of this moment, the last time Albi did something of the sort;

And considering who that was done to defeat, it feels poetic!

Additionally, I’ve had a lot of thoughts since Abyssos about Albi’s aether... I’ve been bouncing back and forth on this idea of Lahabrea doing something with her aether, half motivated by him actually imbuing you with some in order to summon allies just before P8, but also because an Ancient who is so heavily aspected to fire, who already does comment on the WoL’s strange composition, wouldn’t be able to not notice Albi’s still inbalanced fire-aspected aether. I’ve had some scenes I wasn’t sure if I wanted to write or draw, but now I’m just certain that he did take note of it... I think the context is that he gives her some aether after she’s so worn out and woozy from P8, and while it’s not something she consents or agrees to, his feeble poke does help mend the last bits of damage to her aether. This is a story for another time, but, it all goes into this moment with Albi’s aether.

Tangent over!

These lines of dialogue just really hit.

I really adore this design, as much as I am like. Oh my god noooo the lunar moth with eyes thing was my Light Warden/Titania design for Albi! First she took Ultima from me, and now this badass design. I’m happy but like NO, WAIT lmao

Considering Athena has the same hair colour/style as me irl and I’ve always found that amusing, I’m... she’s taken everything from me...

(I really, really like Athena, so I’m allowing it)

I like that she’s simply Theos, to go with the Hemitheos title that the others got. She’s a full god.

The High Seraph’s angels... I know I already talked about my thoughts on the High Seraph, but it was only implied until post-raid. This is the moment I was like ohhhhh yeah, this is 100%

OH, THIS IS... THIS... [shoves my entire fist in my mouth, again]

Glad that we wiped 2 or 3 times, so I could get a few different angles on this. She’s doing the same gesture with the arms, and it’s the same effect, as when the Ultima Weapon casts Ultima.

And it’s called Theos’s Ultima... I only noticed this going over these screenshots again. The Weapons in Werlyt used Optimised Ultima, there’s this, and then I think only Ultima Weapon and Pandæmonium use “just” Ultima. Unsure about the High Seraph, perhaps she does too? I’ll have thoughts about this later!

It was very cool to see what a person using Ultima looks like! Again, I’ll have thoughts about this at the end. The elephant in the room on my personal WoL lore, lmao

I do like Athena, as a character... I’ve always wanted more women villains, especially one who is so unapologetic, and covers the facet of the Ancients that I didn’t initially vibe with; Hermes touched upon it, but the power to create and destroy, and act as a steward of life, is something that cannot only breed good.

And I love Erichthonios... I liked his send-off. He got the emotional farewell/”death” for the sake of the player and their journey. We know the true Erichthonios is sundered later on, but we get this moment

Ah... I am just... ahhhh

Here it is, here’s The Scene. This ended up being so close to a lot of what I wanted for their moment of closure, including the setting, but different enough in ways that were surprising and refreshing

You are him. The option and delivery here was just so perfect, I am going to think about this line forever.

Lahabrea calmly putting the pieces together, asking this, and having the calm response back from WoL... understanding the journey his future self went through, and not even faulting it, because he is so sure in his sense of self that he can see how he would go down that path. This isn’t like Emet balking at the idea of the things he did and calling it fiction, this was Lahabrea understanding, cursing his future blindness, but not even refuting what he does.

While we did not get the moment I really wanted, where we speak to the culmination of “our” Lahabrea who recognises us from ARR and HW, as well as Pandæmonium’s Lahabrea, this might fit his character more. It’s a nice moment in the writing. It’s a moment of dignity for ARR/HW Lahabrea, almost, recognising his acts but not dragging them to the spotlight.

And again, the way he simply and calmly accepts these acts. I love the moment of Claudien thanking him, and recognising him as the Speaker and not as the Ascian, because it’s another full-stop on the note of Lahabrea being someone who was so respected and adored. But Lahabrea, with his calm (”a calm heart stays the course”...) and collected mind, can simply brush that aside. I become your enemy, and your enemy deserves no sympathy.

Everyone (including Albi simply smiling at him) heckling him to accept the thanks is sweet, though. “If you insist on deceiving yourselves, then so be it. My stance remains unchanged.”... I like this writing a lot...

I also really liked Lahabrea’s “I will hear no more, you are not him” in response to Claudien wanting to bring up Erichthonios’s memory. It was a nice touchpoint back to the theme of “you are you, and nobody else” from Shadowbringers... we are neither Ardbert, nor Azem, Gaia is not Loghrif, and Claudien is not Erichthonios. Albi has a lot of complicated thoughts in regards to Azem in her interactions with Lahabrea, particularly in this scene, feeling as if she “should” be doing or saying certain things in order to honour their memory. So this was a good moment in which to hear Lahabrea say this.

I know this is not the “real” Lahabrea, but having this, in the eyes of the player and in context, essentially be his last words... ah... it’s good. It’s sad, and lacks the amount of emotional closure I really did want, but in a way that is simply so succint and fitting of Lahabrea’s character. He’s not as sentimental towards us as someone like Themis, or even Emet-Selch. This is fitting, for him, even if my heart wanted more.

There isn’t always a happy ending. You can’t always have things turn out how you want.

One last trip to wrap things up... Hegemone!! I dressed up as you for Halloween raid night last year. Good to see you

Hehe... I just wanted to say hello... :’)

This is one of the coolest shots and lines of dialogue in the whole raid series. I adore him.

Ah... he did it! It happened! While I suppose he did live without Hephaistos for a fairly long period of time before we encounter him in Abyssos, I was surprised that he’d rejoin with that piece of him so relatively quickly, afterwards. I was anticipating it to be right near the Final Days, if not afterwards? But this was a good scene. I liked the subtle change in him, after - he is still himself, but with that slightly sharper edge.

And then oh my god, we got The Scene... 2

Ah... I guess this is a nice counterpart to the more emotional, wistful farewell scene. Reading these lines again made me misty eyed though, lmao... This is underlining his stance; I am committed to my course, regardless of where it takes you. We are not alike.

I like it! It’s such a clear paralell to Emet’s final final words to us in Ultima Thule... my convictions are invincible. Considering I had issues with them softening up Emet a bit too much in his sentimentality for us, I like that they went out of their way to do the opposite with Lahabrea.

It’s curious - going by Erichthonios’s epilogue, and their mention of the event at the start, the memory versions we journeyed with were created right before the Final Days, they knew about their impending doom. The Lahabrea who gave us his softer farewells also has these memories of this more divisive parting. We got both the respected, wise man of days gone, but also this more haughty man who lines up more with the image we have of him as a villain... hm... I’m going to dwell upon this a lot and come back to it.

In both scenes, I do like his final words. At the same time, I’m glad they’re not his final words from the viewpoint of the Ascian, just in that I don’t have to redo my Final Words sticker set... LOL... but maybe a second set, with these Ancient versions of their final words

Erichthonios’s memory epilogue was good. I like how it all came back to the start.

This screenshot just feels so fake. To be holding the Heart of Sabik so casually... I wish it looked a little bit cooler. I was ready to make an enamel pin, or something.

Speaking of epilogues... damn.

I was SO shocked that this scene was voiced, as I’m sure many were. I’m so, so glad though. He deserved this; we got a bit of this in Endwalker, but getting this semi-final version of him created from pieces of him in the lifestream, meaning he is as complete enough as needed for this closure, with all his memories... it was good. It was very poignant.

This is a “where you go my dearest friend, fate shall surely follow” level of good line. God. This one is going to stick with me.

Goodbye.

Some final optional dialogue with Claudien to confirm the Heart of Sabik’s direct relation to the High Seraph... and there we have it! All done.

I’ll be honest, when I finished this last night, I knew I liked it but... felt depressed, nonetheless. I suppose it was a feeling not unlike grief, that in one day, I’d just seen the end of Gaius and Lahabrea’s stories, as well as the wider Ancients story. And while the latter has not engaged me so much in Endwalker as it did in the past, it’s still been such an ongoing thread, and Pandæmonium has felt like the only part of Endwalker I’ve really connected to... and now it’s over.

Today, especially after going through these screenshots again, and realising I was running on 3 hours of sleep yesterday, I am feeling much better.

I am still slightly sad that Lahabrea did not get as much focus in this raid series as I’d hoped! I wanted this to be his moment of closure equivalent to the Dying Gasp and the Seat of Sacrifice. Not only was the Hephaistos fight not his “true” self in the same manner as Hades, in the end... Emet and Themis just got ANOTHER set of nice moments of closure, in Ultima Thule and then in P11. Having seen Themis’s true form now, it only stands out more how we never saw Lahabrea’s. Themis got that voiced cutscene, but nothing from Lahabrea. I think I’m always going to be slightly hung up on that.

The other thing I felt weirdly conflicted about was that Ultima means so much to me - there’s this nervous energy that comes from having the Heart of Sabik now cleared up and attributed to other characters. Ultima coming in during the music in the Final Day made me cry when I first heard it, and I decided that Albi uses Ultima during that fight, with the help of some post-Werlyt research into the relics left behind from that, and dynamis. Last night, after finishing Anabaseios, I was left feeling like I couldn’t even use that any more. I never liked the High Seraph much, I was sad that none of the music in this raid tier even used the Ultima leitmotif, and now it was Athena’s “thing”...

But the whole point of Albi using Ultima was that she was reclaiming it in the name of hope, as she has done with Allagan relics before it, as she did with all of the final boss motifs in the Final Day’s theme. I’m still keeping it. :) Seeing that Athena’s was call Theos’s Ultima, I’m thinking Albi’s might just have a different name, too. Magi’s Ultima, or something. I’ll work on it.

My god, this post became so long. But I had a lot riding on Anabaseios! I’m happy with it. I’m glad that of all the tiers this expansion, the one I raided most fully was Abyssos, though, and that is possibly still one that means the most to me. But I’m looking forward to casually progging Anabaseios, and seeing what P12S might be like!

Lahalbi... real? Not really, not in the ways I’d hoped. But they mean a lot to me, as does Ultima.

#6.4 spoilers #pandæmonium #anabaseios #reactions

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eepyghost · 10 months

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i’m in desperate need of fnc content and i haven’t had time to read ur works yet so can you share your fav fnc hc !!

this took a WHILE bc i have so many ideas in my noggin but here is a short drabble of gillion staring at chip and realizing he's in love (because love realization scenes are my fav to write and it's my BIRTHDAY so im gonna write it as my gift to myself)

cw: lot of internal shame + religious trauma, gillion yearns hardcore, VERY poetry centric because i was in a Mood and i'm sleep deprived

word count: 840

song insp: sidelines - phoebe bridgers

Scripture had spoken about the way the Gods touched Mana so many years ago, before oceans and open, adventure-kissed skies were yet in bloom. A touch from the Gods was akin to the soft, tender brushing of watercolor across canvas. A blossom of color, spreading through the area around it, covering the space in beauty. A Touch had created the colors of the shoreline. The splatters of aquamarine and white as saltwater turned to rock-crossed foam. A Touch had created the many colors of the coral reefs, the cocophany of twisted, porous surfaces, reaching up towards the sky as if opening their arms.

Gillion Tidestrider remembered the tale from years ago, and perhaps it was blasphemous, sinful, even, but he had a theory in his head. He could’ve sworn a Touch had been the thing that had created Chip.

Perhaps it was more sinful to use that as an excuse to stare at him.

That particular day, the sunset was golden, and it was kissing Chip’s shoulders. His shirt was partially unbuttoned as he sat, legs hiked up, on the ship’s railing. From afar, Gillion could simply watch him do it, letting his eyes trace over every detail. The white fabric was draped elegantly over Chip’s shoulders, dipping a bit down his freckled, scarred back. The traces of sunlight lapped at his skin, shadowing his collarbones and the edges of his tattoos, which climbed up his revealed skin in peeks of color. Wind carded its tender fingers through his hair, playing with it the same way a lover would, pulling a lock behind his ears.

Gillion used to rarely dream.

His nightly rests in the Undersea were usually too quick to allow for any sort of proper dreaming. Even on the ship or in the comfort of an Oversea inn, his mind remained quiet in the dark. As if he had trained it to purge every hope of peace that it had, to remain on high-alert at any given moment. Rest had barely become a piece of his vocabulary, even after the memories of the Undersea became drowned out by memories of being a pirate, let alone dream. Dreams were for the young. The innocent. The unscarred.

He remembered his first dream living in the Oversea, though, because it had Chip’s face lingering within its pages.

Like many childhood dreams, it came in fragments. Bits of a conversation that had not happened. Chip’s voice was not angry. His fists did not shake. He had stared at Gillion in calmness.

What’re you even hoping to achieve here, Tidestrider?

I had hoped to follow my path.

Your destiny.

Precisely.

What does destiny even know about you?

I am…not certain what you mean.

I mean, fuck, what do your Gods even know about you? Who does Destiny actually think you are?

I…I’m the Champion of-

The Undersea. I got that. You’re following the destiny of the Champion.

Chip, I do not understand-

When’d you even start with this whole “destiny” thing, anyway?

I-I…was very young. It was sculpted for me before I was born.

So destiny knew you when you were a kid.

…

Maybe your destiny doesn’t know you as an adult. Maybe things would be different if you hadn’t outgrown a destiny no longer meant for you.

Are you insinuating my place as Champion is-

I’m insinuating that destiny doesn’t know you. It doesn’t see you, it doesn’t fight alongside you, it doesn’t care about you, it doesn’t NEED you, Gillion. But I do.

He had woken, not in the same cold sweat Chip always had after nightmares, but in the uncharacteristically calm sensation that pooled in his chest. He had decided that feeling was guilt.

Chip came with that guilt. That warm, nagging sensation that tugged at his bottom rib, sinking him deep into his own shame. Chip would laugh a little too loud, smile a little too wide, and Gillion would feel his chest cave in on itself. He would tighten, bite on his tongue, and taste the blood that came with staring too long at the young, boyish pirate.

Boyish. That’s exactly how anybody would describe Chip. But Gillion? No, he knew the ways to describe Chip, he knew the way poets would fight to the death to be the one lucky enough to write about him. Had the poor man seen the same flecks of gold that bedeck your eyes, he would have thanked his savior for the mercy he has been given. Had the moon laid eyes on you, perhaps day would never rise, as it would long to stare at you for as long as it possibly could. I live in that “perhaps”, Chip. It is a heaven that I force myself into, and it is a heaven that I would spend eternity in.

It’s in that same heaven that he found himself right back inside of, staring at Chip as he watched the sunset. It was in that heaven he would die.

Guilt and shame be damned. Chip had been touched by the Gods.

#it's 1 am and im on the floor and none of this is related to canon #and im 19 !!!#jrwi #jrwi riptide #just roll with it #gillion tidestrider #chip jrwi #jrwi gillion #fish n chips #just roll with it riptide

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lightlycareless · 2 years

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THE NEW CHAPTER,, SO MUCH,,,

naoaki and y/n are... essentially dating now even if they won't admit it. i won't hear otherwise. and good for her! good for her. she deserves a man that appreciates her properly

VERY close to fist-fighting junko. i am about to crawl into the narrative myself and put up the dukes with her- yes i know its not her fault shes suffering in the place as well and just exerting the minimal amount of control over her life she does have- BUT. I Am On The Verge. my patience with this woman is minimal

THE NEW SHIP,,, i'm very eager to see where this goes. i was NOT expecting naohiko to actually say please- this is very good gives good depth to some of our beloved side characters. can't wait to see how it develops!

so far,,, rantas plan could be worse?? he's not necessarily WRONG in countering bad news with good news, and there's definitely worse ways to handle it than by a doctors appointment to check on y/ns health. but i.... can not see it going well. these two are not going to be able to get along in extended quarters- especially ALONE in a CAR- without something going horribly wrong.

also, for a very brief moment while reading my eyes jumped over a paragraph and i interpreted y/n's internal dialogue worried about her health as NAOYA'S internal dialogue being worried, and was so pleasantly surprised. like "aw. he's concerned for her health- oh. nope. misread that. he's the same as always." i'm too charitable to the man to even believe it for a moment smh.

and-- i've just been wondering, are we gonna see the last two of naoya's brothers eventually? i remember them being mentioned a good few chapters ago, but we've not had the chance to meet them yet. any plans for them down the line?

Hello again!!

Akgasgakjsg I always look forward to your feedback, you always bring interesting points that I often just… slip my mind 🤣 hahaha or that I want to write more about!!

Let’s start with the elephant in the room: Naoaki and Y/N lol, I definitely think if anyone saw that they would’ve been like “oh no, it’s official” (Ranta probably thought so back then, in that unfortunate night… lol NAOYA IS IN DENIAL)

However, I think the “dating” part is more official in Naoaki’s mind than in Y/N’s as of right now. She probably wants to be a bit more… reciprocal to his advances, but she’s really shy 🤣 (as well as knowing this isn’t the right place or time to do so) yet, she tries what she can. Writing them together feels almost wrong tbh, like I’m walking deeper into a labyrinth I know I’ll have trouble getting out of. But what is a good story without risks?! Besides, as you stated, good for her. I want Naoya to suffer, and I did promise to do so…

From there, Junko. Omg I totally get what you mean, but I just… I just can’t feel anything but sadness and pity for her 😭 The fact that she’s more likely than not, acting out on her husband’s weird requests (if not fantasies) is so sickening to me. Like isn’t Ogi man enough to do so himself!? GET AWAY FROM HER. I swear to god… He’s always blaming others for his misfortune, well let me tell you sir, it’s already been stated that you’re weak af lmao. Mai and Maki had nothing to do with you not being the clan leader 🤡

AND THE NEW SHIP hahahahahha I’ll never get tired of saying this, Hitomi and Naohiko was like a surprise to me as well!! It just flashed before my eyes… I was like… yes… them… together… but how? Who knows! Isn’t that exciting? It’s one of those things I didn’t have planned when writing down the plotline, but I’m sure it’ll develop down the road :> I can’t wait to see where the characters take me 🤭🤭 (Him being completely, or somewhat lenient towards Hitomi is… ah, delightful)

Now, Ranta’s plan. I think his plan was more focused on bringing Naoya and Y/N together than anything else, I mean sure, he also cares for his friend and doesn’t want to make his relationship with his father any worse, but he’s at the point where he’s like “well, his marriage is still salvageable!” compared to Naobito’s so… but still, he really miscalculated Y/N if he thinks she’s going to be all understanding of Naoya out of the sudden…

Hahahah I’m sorry for the misunderstanding 😭 it’s probably a consequence of being tormented for so long regarding Naoya and his relationship with Y/N, that we’re out here clinging to the crumbs of his redemption… I wish to say more but I can’t without spoiling the story so… asgkasghkjaghjkas I can’t wait to show you what happens in the future. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised :>

And finally, regarding the rest of the siblings… as of right now, I do not have anything planned for them. I think that with the amount of side characters I’m working on now is more than enough (I still have one more —major, I think— character to introduce 👀) however, considering how the Hitomi and Naohiko thing happened completely out of the blue… who knows hehe. But as of right now, they’re super busy with doing Naoya’s work while he’s suspended so I don’t see them hanging around the estate. Maybe we’ll see them here and there, small interactions in a way, in the future!

Still, if there’s something you wish to know more about them, don’t hesitate to let me know! I think it’d be interesting to write their perspective on the whole Naoaki/Naoya/Y/N thing going on 😂

Anyways, thank you so much for turning in to the newest update 🥰❤ reading your comments is always… so inspirational, and motivational as well 🥺❤ I hope you continue to like the rest of the story!

Have a wonderful week, take care, and hope to see you soon!!

#ask #ask series: first it hurts—#naoya zenin #naoya zen'in #naoya x reader #naoya zenin x reader #naoya zenin x your #jjk naoya #naoya zen'in x reader

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mauermann · 1 year

Text

Reprimands

Alex had just hung up on the phone when he heard pounding at the door of his apartment. He wasn’t shocked. He was only surprised it hadn’t come sooner. Sighing through his nose, he walked over and opened the door, quieting his dogs with a hand gesture at the same time. Lily stood before him, clearly fuming.

“You’re going to let me in,” she demanded.

Alex raised an eyebrow and bowed sarcastically as he stepped aside for her. She only took a few steps in, enough for him to close the door, before she turned on him.

“You know why I’m here,” she said, gritting her teeth.

“Yes.”

“Is that all you have to say to me? Yes?”

“What else do you want?” he asked, sounding tired.

“Oh, gee, I don’t know, maybe a fucking apology for one!”

“For what? Defending you?”

“For ruining everything!"

"He was disrespecting you. Should I ignore that?"

"I had everything under control! Everything was fine! And now? Who the fuck knows! He thought I sent you after him! He nearly broke up with me!"

"Good! You shouldn't be with him if he treats you like this!"

"He's not fucking abusing me, Alexander! He's just a moron who says stupid stuff!"

"You don't even--"

"Don't you even start with that! I know exactly what I want, and it doesn't involve you inserting yourself and beating him up like this!"

"You--"

The sound of the door opening stopped them both. They turned to look, and both felt a clench in their guts. Herr Beilschmidt stood in the doorframe, tutting and looking sinisterly gleeful.

"Children, please, such loud fighting. I could hear you through the door."

Lily looked down, as though ashamed, but Alex glared at the man who was now striding into his home as if he owned it. Herr Beilschmidt stopped beside Lily and put his hand on her shoulder.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you, girl."

Lily forced herself to look up at him. She repressed a shudder as he gently pushed some of her hair behind her ear.

"Now, Liliane, I think you've said plenty. Why don't you run along and take care of your man, like a good young lady ought to do, hmm? I'll handle this one."

Lily glanced between the two of them, with wide eyes. "Yes, sir," she said, her voice now subdued. She turned and left without another word or glance at Alex.

When the door clicked shut, Herr Beilschmidt turned his full attention to the other man. His grin was gone, replaced with narrowed eyes and a thin line of a mouth. His left hand gripped the eagle head of his cane tightly. "You know why I'm here, boy," he spat, "so let's just skip right to it. What the fuck were you thinking?"

Alex made himself stand tall. He was taller than the other man now, but he still felt his gut clenching. His nostrils flared. “He disrespected Lily.”

“And that’s enough of a reason to start an international crisis?”

“I haven’t started anything.”

Herr Beilschmidt backhanded him across the face. “Do not back talk to me, boy.”

Alex clenched his fists tightly. He could feel the adrenaline pumping through him once again but still, he waited for the man to speak.

“Do you have any idea what you’ve done? Decades of work are on the line now, because of you! You could have started a war! And all because he ‘disrespected your sister.’”

“We aren’t going to have a war.”

“Quiet, boy! While you’re busy being a little shit, some of us are working to improve this nation on the global stage. I will not see our hard work undone by your stupidity. Now you listen here. I don’t care if he fucking assaults her, you are not to lay a fucking finger on the American again. Do I make myself clear?”

Alex was breathing quickly now. He could feel his face turning red.

Herr Beilschmidt’s eyes narrowed again. “Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes,” hissed Alex.

“Good. Now, while you run away like a fucking coward, and while Ludwig is lying useless in the hospital, I will busy myself with trying to clean up your stupid, fucking mess. God knows we can’t rely on Liliane to do it all.”

Alex’s hand twitched. The other man either didn’t notice or pretended not to. Instead, he was turning to leave.

Without turning back, he added, “Do not ever do anything like this ever again, or you will regret the day you were born.” Before Alex could think of something to say or do, he left, slamming the door behind him.

Alex yelled and punched the wall closest to him. His dogs started barking, but he didn’t care this time. He didn’t care that he now had a hole in the wall either. Caring was what got him into this shit in the first place. So he wasn’t going to care anymore. They could all go to hell.

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octolingo-writes · 2 years

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17, 19, 39

For the writer asks!

17. What do you do when writing becomes difficult? Usually I just move on to writing another project, because I have so many that are going at once. If I don’t have any motivation at all, I either stare at my computer screen until something hits me, or I force myself to write even little bitty sentences because something is better than nothing

19. What is the most-used tag on your ao3? I wasn’t sure if there was an official way to find this, but I did some math and it seems to be variations of Hurt/Comfort—it’s in 35 out of my 91 fics, so almost 40% of my fics are tagged h/c

39. Share a snippet from a WIP: this is from JRWI WIP :)

“You’re not a big fan of these either, huh?” Chip spun around, clenching his hands into fists and bringing them up to protect his face. Instead of the visage of a magical sorcerer or some undead being, Chip found himself looking down at a burly Dwarven man. The first thing Chip noticed was that the Dwarf was bald, and the urge to slap the man’s head gripped him for only a moment; the man had muscles that suggested he could break Chip in half like a toothpick. The Dwarf wore a rusty-colored tuxedo and iron-tipped boots, and he tugged uncomfortably at his collar with one hand. Chip wasn’t the only one who felt out of place in formal situations, it seemed. “You can put your fists down, kid.” Chip lowered his fists immediately, embarrassed. “What makes you think I’m not a fan?” He challenged defensively. The man laughed.

“It’s practically written on your face.” He said. “You’re not as slick as you think you are.” “I don’t think I’m slick!” Chip protested indignantly, beginning to feel as if he was being chastised by some sort of teacher.

“Uh-huh.” The Dwarf said skeptically. “I’m Mountain, by the way.” “I’m Chip!” Chip said, then internally cursed. What was the point of his dapper alter-ego, Felix Lionsgold, if he never used the name? Or the accent? He’d forgotten the accent too. He would’ve facepalmed, but didn’t want to seem stupid in front of Mountain. “Uh, what brings you here?” “Invitation, like everyone else.” Mountain said, his tone suggesting he didn’t think Chip had gotten an invitation through legal means. Chip was offended. Sure, he hadn’t technically been invited, but the insinuation that he would resort to stealing was just plain rude—the fact that he had been thinking about stealing the jewelry from a wealthy-looking woman just five minutes ago was irrelevant. “You got any friends?”

“Uh, yeah, Jay and Gillion.” Chip said. This was a very strange conversation. “I don’t know where either of them went, but they’re around here.”

“I wish they didn’t make us leave our weapons.” Mountain grumbled. Chip’s eyes lit up as he realized he now had an actual topic to talk about with his new acquaintance. He held up his cane and pointed to it, then leaned in to whisper.

“There’s a sword in my cane.” He said, grinning. “It’s a fake cane.” “Wait, really?” Mountain said incredulously. “That’s awesome! Maybe I should start a fight just so I can see you use it.”

“Well, maybe don’t… do that.”

“Eh, not right now, at least.” Mountain crossed his arms and looked out over the crowd of fancily-dressed people. “Well, if nothing else happens, at least I found one person who doesn’t fit in here.” “Hey, I fit in just fine!” Chip exclaimed. Mountain glanced at him.

“Sure you do, kid.”

#jrwi #jrwi riptide #jrwi fated #ask game #octo posts #octo answers #octo writes #thank you for the ask!!!#:D

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fawnoir · 2 years

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God hates me especially. If you even care.

#who was the guy who fought the angel and got his arm broken bc me #instead I’d square up w god bc he honestly could have let me been born a man so that I wouldn’t have turned out so fucked in the head #abt my perceived safety or lack thereof #this has all been spurred by the fact that I’ve been forced to re-remember that race play + corrective r*pe ‘kinks’ exist #where is that post abt being suggested blogs that you’d actively get a restraining order against #bc I just read a post that has triggered my fight or flight to such a degree ….it’s insane #if I ever met a man and found out he’d get off on r*ping me either bc of my race or my fear of dick I’d just kill him and then myself #bc it not fair that ppl like that get to be having fun while I’m critically unhinged bc i feel trapped in this body #we both get die I’ve decided!#then I’d bait god into a fist fight and win #literally my soul would materialize in front of him and I’d choke him out until he gave me what I want #i waant to be a boy like I’m going feral abt it I just want to fuck w the universe and make it so that I was born a guy #I’ll be so responsible w my privilege I promise I swear so so much #lemme switch my avatar lemme out I’ll stop biting :))#also idc that I may have internalized -isms or internalized -phobia or whatever the fuck idc idccccc fuck off!#I’m done ~unlearning~ shit until I discover proof that it’s WORTH IT

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saetoru · 3 years

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𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 | 𝐓𝐎𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐎𝐊𝐈 𝐄𝐍𝐉𝐈.

synopsis: enji has always thought pain was good, that it meant he was well on his way to the top. but you seem to make him have doubts when your touch is gentle like that.

tags: nsfw 18+, minors do not interact, afab! reader, dom! reader, hand jobs, edging, humping, cock slapping, slight degradation, ruined orgasms, unprotected sex, cowgirl, creampie, praise, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, slight breeding kink, mentions of toxic families (it’s the todoroki’s hello), established relationship, enji and rei are implied to be divorced (no cheating or home-wrecking)

word count: 5.0k

notes: i swear i’m not an enji apologist i just wanted to challenge myself that’s all. ty baby ris for beta reading and editing the manga panel for me <3

it’s been a long day.

enji treks up the hallway leading to your apartment, and after taking a moment to roll the tension out of his shoulders, he knocks two times and waits thirty seconds before the door is being opened. you’re there, a soft smile on your face, and it’s like you’ve been ready, like you’ve known he was coming when he does—for a moment, he supposes maybe you do. you hold a hand out for his coat and he offers it to you silently, no efforts to insist he can do it himself.

his muscles are tense. they’re aching, they feel too heavy to even move properly. and for the longest time, he’s always prided himself in that. he’s always prided himself in the constant throb he fights through, the deep aches after long battles and intense training. pain means he’s worked hard, pain means he’s growing, pain means he’s rising to the top.

but now, he doesn’t think he wants pain anymore, nor does it mean any good.

it’s odd, and enji doesn’t quite understand. it’s not like him, it’s a strange realization to come to and he can’t begin to decipher what it means. it feels like he doesn’t know what he wants or who he is, like he doesn’t understand if he’s been going about it all wrong this whole time, or if it’s simply been nothing but a complete waste.

he’s furrowing his brows, and then his fists are clenching. even that hurts—clenching them too hard shoots a twinge of pain up his arm, and his muscles are too weak to even make a proper fist tightly.

slowly, his brain starts to run a mile a minute as he remembers things he usually never bothered caring to remember. shoto’s coming to intern, he said he might bring a few friends. fuyumi asked for a family dinner, she wants to make his favorite. natsuo’s girlfriend might come over next weekend, he said not to be home then. and suddenly, enji’s fist is being pried open—he’s subconsciously clenched it tight enough that his nails dig into his palms.

the pain is there. and pain is good, he tells himself. pain means he’s worked hard, pain means he’s growing, pain means he’s rising to the top.

“enji,” you murmur softly, brushing your thumb gingerly over his knuckles. your hands have his in your grasp, and it’s gentle. he doesn’t understand. “enji, you should clean up.”

“right,” he nods, but his face is far away, and even as he looks right into your eyes, he’s not really looking at you.

“was it a rough fight?” you ask cautiously. he shakes his head.

no. it was a rough day. he doesn’t know how to tell you that—partly because he doesn’t really know how to talk about his day or his feelings, and partly because he doesn’t particularly want to. but he should, he knows he should—and more importantly, he knows he has to learn.

“no,” he says simply. he’s prepared to leave it at that, but your eyes push him to tell more, and he knows if this time is going to be different, he needs to be different. “today was…stressful,” he settles on.

“okay,” you nod. you’re patient, something he’s never been. you’re sweet and kind, something he’s never been known for. your touch on his skin seems to soothe him, cool him down—but all his touch seems to do is set things ablaze. he’s starting to think he could simply look at something a little too long before it burns to ashes. “why was it stressful?”

now you’re doing that thing, that thing that enji loves yet hates at the same time. you’re prying. you’re getting answers out of him and making him elaborate. but you’re not nosy, and you’re not forceful, and somehow the words find a way out of his mouth on their own.

“i woke up earlier than usual.”

“and why’s that?”

“my dream was unpleasant,” he mumbles quietly, almost like he’s praying you don’t hear.

but of course, you do. “do you want to talk about it? nightmares always feel very real—”

“it was an unpleasant dream,” he corrects, and you pause. nightmare sounds childish, nightmares aren’t things he has time for. he can’t afford to waste a day dwelling on something as petty as a nightmare.

but dreams can turn rather unpleasant—anybody’s mind can be preoccupied with an unpleasant dream. you nod slowly before rubbing over his chest in what he supposes is your attempt to ease him.

it seems to be working, to his mild shock.

“right,” you agree, “it also helps to talk unpleasant dreams out too.” eyeing him softly, your hand trails up his broad and sturdy chest, inching past his shoulder to rub the skin of his neck in slow circles. “but you don’t have to if you’re uncomfor—”

“i have an older son too,” he blurts, cutting you off. you furrow your eyebrows, staring up at him as you nod slowly.

“yeah, natsuo. i know, you told me. he goes to university, he’s majoring in—”

enji cuts you off again. you’re still patient—you don’t glare or roll your eyes or clench your jaw, he notes.

“no. i have another. i had another. he’s…he’s gone,” he mumbles quietly.

the pain is back. it’s somewhere he can’t quite trace. it’s not reverberating through his muscles or pounding through his skull or stinging through his cuts and gashes. it’s dull at first, it’s faint, untraceable. and then all at once, it’s stabbing, and it’s in his chest.

he claws his shirt, and you try to pry his hand away, but he yanks back from your touch. you gasp lightly, and his eyes widen—and then he’s taking a step back.

pain is there, but why does he feel like he hasn’t worked hard enough? why does it feel like he has no room to grow? why does it feel like he’s stuck at rock bottom?

“enji,” your voice is calling out to him quietly as you take a cautious step forward. he lets you, staring at you with wide eyes as you reach up to cup his cheek. this is gentle, this is everything he’s not. he knows this isn’t meant for him—he’s long lived past the days that he was perhaps capable of accepting something gentle and nurturing and loving.

but he’s selfish—this much, enji knows—and if he’s going to be selfish this way and that, he might as well be selfish here too for at least a moment.

“he’s gone,” he says again, closing his eyes as you rub your palm up and down his cheek. he hasn’t shaved in a few days, you note. you don’t know what to say, so you don’t speak, quietly gliding your hand across his skin and reaching to squeeze his hand with the other.

it’s a while before you finally speak up again. “you should shower,” you murmur, and then you tilt your head to leave a kiss on his jaw. it eases the ache, and he wants more.

“it was my fault.” his voice is deep, it comes from his chest and more often than not, enji’s voice is a loud boom. but this is the closest you’ve heard it be to a croak. you sigh, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling his forehead to press against yours. when your lips press against his, he doesn’t think twice about kissing back, and once more he thinks how easy it is for him to be selfish.

you know bits and pieces of enji’s past. you’ve put two and two together—of his kids, of his actions, and even of his ex-wife too. enji is far from a worthy man, he’s far from deserving of second chances or new ones at all—but all you see is a lost man, no path to take and no compass to lead him. it makes you pity him at first, and though it never should have, somewhere along the way it’s developed into more.

you know a man like enji shouldn’t be nurtured, but you find yourself doing so anyway. he knows he shouldn’t allow himself to indulge in something he doesn’t deserve, but he latches onto you every chance he gets.

he’s selfish, and you’re selfless, and the more you give the more he can’t help but take.

“i wish you’d let me see what goes on in that head of yours,” you murmur against his lips, and he’s pressing into them desperately to close the small gap you’ve placed between you to speak. his hands grip your waist tightly—but he’s aware of his own strength, something he wasn’t before, and he’s careful not to let it hurt.

enji’s learned how to be careful over time, but he’s not sure if it’s enough. he’s sure it’s not enough to make you stay, and he knows he has no right to ask, so he’s stuck. he’s stuck succumbing to the need to run back to you for as long as you let him, and he’s stuck accepting to be turned away when you stop.

“i’d understand better if you did,” you say in between kisses along his jaw. your hand trails down in between his legs, pleasantly surprised to find he’s already half hard. pathetic. he’s pathetic to latch onto any sense of intimacy, to let small bits of it affect him this much, but you give it to him so relentlessly—no hesitations, no second thoughts, no changing your mind.

he grunts quietly in surprise when you squeeze around his bulge, eyes fluttering closed. slowly, a wet patch starts to form on his pants from the leaking of his slit with pre cum, and he groans a little louder when you palm him through the fabric.

“the…the bedroom,” he manages to say through his ragged pants, eyes still closed from the small bit of friction your hand provides him. pathetic. only a man as pathetic as him, supposedly strong and number one—though he doesn’t even believe he’s earned the title in the first place, would fall apart like this from a simple touch. but his cock is aching, and your hand is gentle, and he’s so, so incredibly starved.

enji has never cared much for the indulgence of being soft. not up until now, at least. he’s only recently begun craving it from you, your hands running over his scars, your lips searing into his skin, your fingers threading into his hair. and then there are the mundane things too, the way you brew his coffee perfectly every morning with a smile, the way you ask about how many arrests he’s made that day, the way your legs casually swing over his lap as you sprawl across the couch.

you’re soft, and he likes it. the riptides of your affection put his flames at bay, and for the first time, todoroki enji isn’t worried about making sure his flame is burning the brightest. there are more pressing matters, he reasons.

there are more pressing matters—like what happened in that show you’ve been watching, and he thinks he can spare a moment out of his day to hear you ramble about it over dinner. there are more pressing matters—like your body curving into his as you sleep, and maybe he doesn’t have to be the first one in the agency all the time in the mornings. there are more pressing matters—like the sound of your laugh as you tell him about stories from work, and perhaps taking the time to listen is more meaningful than he thought.

“the bedroom can wait for a bit,” you whisper, and before he can stop you, your hand is reaching past his waistband and pulling out his hardened length, “i want you here first.” and he doesn’t want to stop you, not when your hand wraps around his thick girth like that, thumbing at his slit to collect the pre cum he’s leaking. you smear it over his cock, slowly and deliberately, and he lets out a shaky breath.

if there’s one thing about todoroki enji that you’ve noticed, it’s that he doesn’t let himself make a sound. he pants quietly, and if you’re lucky, he might gift you with a few grunts if it’s on a particularly stressful day—perhaps one like today. you make it your mission to draw out as much as you can from him today.

your thumb traces over the thick vein on the underside of his cock as you stroke his length, unhurriedly, taking your time to roll your palm over his tip. it’s almost painfully slow, and enji has always made a point to do everything in his life quickly, but he can’t help but relish in how good it feels when you take it slow. with a shaky breath, he gently pushes you to lean against the wall not far behind you, both of his hands bracing themselves against the surface on either side of your head as he closes his eyes at the up and down drag of your palm.

“you know,” you hum, gently rolling your thumb over his tip in slow circles, “the more vocal you are, the more you get.” he bucks his hips to press into your touch more, but you simply pull your hand away. just like that, you’re given a quiet, frustrated grunt, and a twitch of his brows.

“you heard me, enji,” you murmur, more firmly this time. “you gotta earn it if you want me to touch you.” a twisting feeling pools in his chest, and there’s an insatiable need to feel the softness you usually offer him, so he makes sure not to hold back from letting out the soft groan that pours from his mouth when you grab his length once more and stroke. he gasps in shock when your other hand reaches to fondle with his balls, massaging them lightly and rolling them in your palm. his hips chase your hand’s rhythm with a rhythm of their own as he cants them up, trying his best to keep himself from fucking your fist at his own pace.

“f-faster,” he grunts lowly, head hanging low as his chest rises and falls with each labored breath, “need more.” smiling, you shake your head as you almost let out a quiet chuckle, just the slightest bit amused by his statement.

“c’mon,” you tease lightly, letting his head fall to your shoulder, digging into the crook of your neck as he groans when you squeeze lightly at his tip, “you can be a bit more polite, don’t you think?”

“go a little faster, please,” he mumbles quietly, voice strained as you slow your hand down to get your point across. humming in satisfaction, you quicken your pace, squeezing lightly at the tip with each stroke. enji groans, and his hips rut into your fist to meet your movements. “f-fuck, like that,” he stutters, choking on a gasp when your thumb slides along his slit.

“tell me when you’re close, okay?” you ask, and he nods into your neck, moaning lowly into the skin as you work him to his orgasm. he’s panting, breathing harshly as his eyes are screwed shut, his hands have moved to grasp at your hips to ground him as his thighs shake—and enji knows it’s a rather pitiful state to be in, but he can’t find it in himself to care as he feels his cock twitch, ready to shoot his seed over your hand.

“i’m close,” he pants, “gonna…gonna cum, fuck—” but then your hand pulls away, and his breath chokes as he fists the fabric of the edge of your shirt. he grits his teeth, hissing as he tries to ignore the throb of his cock as his orgasm dies down.

“the bedroom, enji,” you breathe against the shell of his ear, and he doesn’t have to be told twice.

pathetic. it’s pathetic how eager he really is, but he’s quickly leading you to your bedroom through a mess of sloppy kisses and muffled groans. by the time your back hits the mattress, you’re already down to your bra and underwear, and he’s down to nothing but his boxers, the waistband tucked under his balls as his cock stands stiffly—it’s reddened at the tip, bead of pre cum collecting, and it’s searingly hot against the skin of your thigh as he hovers over you, pressing his lips to yours once more.

enji knows there’s no place he really belongs—there’s no place he really deserves to belong. he’s not earned his title of number one, he’s not earned a spot in his own home, he’s not earned the right to be with his family, and he’s not earned having a place he can return to. but for some reason, you let him in through your doors, and you welcome him with open arms.

he sinks just a bit more weight onto you as his tongue explores your mouth, and there’s a small sense of satisfaction when you moan into his mouth. his cock rubs against your thigh, and he moans freely against your lips, humping against you to chase the friction. you pull away, hand finding his crimson roots and tugging them as he kisses you, drinking in the moans he spills as his length drags desperately against your skin.

“enji, don’t cum yet—” but it’s too late, and before he can quite stop himself, he’s choking on gasps as thick spurts of cum shoot from his tip, painting your thigh white as he reaches his peak. he’s panting, breath labored as his forehead presses against yours, and you let him work himself through his orgasm as you watch him.

“fuck,” he groans, “f-fuck, didn’t mean to cum yet, i’m sorry,” he rasps, and enji knows he’s so pathetic that it’s almost painful. but he can’t seem to get a grip of his composure when you’ve taken over all of his senses, and he also knows it’s a losing battle to even try.

“that’s okay,” you hum sweetly—too sweetly, and he groans when you tug his head harshly by the strands to pull away from you.

with a quick motion, you’re guiding him to switch positions with you, and he’s letting you. he doesn’t fight it, doesn’t put up an argument or let out even a slight protest—pliant and willing and in the palm of your hands. and he should seem downright pathetic, but you love every second of seeing him like this.

you seat yourself on a muscled thigh, staring down at him with a glint in your eyes as you smile. “i’ll just have to teach you not to be greedy, enji.”

he’s still painfully hard, cock swollen and glistening with his previous release and the beads of pre cum still weeping from his tip, and he lets out a low cry when your hand comes in contact with his shaft, a swift slap that stings and makes him flinch but feels good all at the same time.

pain is good, it makes him feel alive, and even if he craves your gentleness, sometimes old habits die hard. his head throws back against the headboard of your bed, and his eyes are squeezed shut as you deliver another harsh blow to his length. he groans both in pain and in pleasure, cock twitching slightly, more pre cum dribbling from his angry tip, and you tut as you shake your head.

“you like that, huh? you’re filthy, enji,” you sneer, leaning down to whisper against his ear, “fucking pathetic is what you are, aren’t you? look like you’re about to cum again from getting slapped around. is that really what gets you off?”

“‘m sorry,” he repeats, gasping as your hand strikes him once more, and his eyes dart down to train on his own member, watching the way it bobs as you punish him over and over again. “‘m sorry, please—fuck, gonna cum again. gonna—fuck,” he groans, and then he’s cumming a second time, except this time, there’s no friction, no touch from you to aid him through his release, and his cock twitches with each rope of cum that shoots across his abs.

“well if you want to cum so bad, you can,” you spit crossing your arms and leaning away.

enji knows he should’ve stopped, he knows he shouldn’t have kept going, but you’re so addictive. you’re so hard to stay away from, to pull away from, and no matter how many orgasms you ruin, enji doesn’t think he’ll ever learn his lesson. even as his hips rut helplessly, searching for friction he knows won’t come, he doesn’t think he’ll ever know better next time. and you watch as his orgasm rips through him. it’s unsatisfactory, leaves him panting with his chest rising and falling erratically, leaves a sheen of sweat on his skin as he slumps against the bed frame. you cup his cheek and he leans into your palm, clenching his jaw as he tries to calm his breathing.

“i should leave you like this since you want to act like—”

“no,” he cuts you off quickly, fingers digging into your hips deeply as he clutches tighter, “please,” he rasps. you raise a brow, and your knee slides between his legs to just barely rub up and down his member. he shudders at the sensitivity, moaning lowly as you bring him up to full hardness once more.

“please what? use your words, enji,” you coo, “cumming twice can’t dumb you down that bad, can it?”

“need to be in you, please,” he croaks, “want to cum in you.” it must be good enough for you because next thing enji knows, you’re sinking down on his length, slipping his girth past your slick folds. he inhales sharply, breathing heavier as his mouth parts with a silent gasp, and you lean to trail kisses up his jaw until you reach his ear.

“c’mon, you know i like hearing you,” you whisper against his ear, kissing the shell. he shudders, and then you snap your hips, sinking down on his cock deeper as you squeeze around him. “be good and let me hear you, yeah?”

enji gifts you with a whimper, and for a moment there’s a sense of pride that someone so strong and tough is desperately taking all you can give him, falling apart from the seams right under you. you grin, playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck as you bounce on his length with a steady rhythm. a low moan rumbles from his chest, and his own hips snap up to meet you halfway.

“see? don’t you sound so pretty?” you murmur, lips kissing the corner of his where his scar starts. you kiss up the expanse of his scar, just until under his eye, watching as it flutters shut from the softness of your actions. “look so pretty too,” you add sweetly.

it makes him moan louder, and it spurs you on as you bounce on his cock faster, hands gripping his shoulders as he guides your hips with his hands. he thrusts up into your cunt, and he chokes on a groan when your walls flutter around him as his swollen tip kisses your spot. you gasp, your head thrown back and eyes rolling as he stretches you out, and the sight is so obscene, enji isn’t sure how long he can keep himself from releasing once more.

he’s sensitive, his last two orgasms back to back leaving him just the slightest bit overwhelmed, and he can feel himself quickly approaching his third. his thumb finds your clit, trying to work you to your peak just a bit faster as he rubs quick circles, making you whine.

“s-slow down,” he pants, cutting himself off with a grunt as you sink back down on his length. “fuck, feels so good,” and you cut him off with a kiss, exploring his mouth as your skin slaps against his, the wet sound of his length sinking in and out of your cunt filling the room.

you groan into each other's mouths, drinking in the sounds the other makes. enji’s skin is flushed a deep red, sweat clinging to his chest as your hands rub across the expanse. your thumbs find his nipples, rubbing circles as his cock twitches and he groans. you pinch lightly, and he all but whines into your mouth.

there aren’t many who would ever think someone like todoroki enji whines as you fuck him, but you render him defenseless, in the palms of your hands and at your mercy.

“gonna cum again, enji? so quickly? you haven’t even made me cum yet,” you pant. his balls are heavy and aching to release, and with a few more thrusts of your hips, he stills, the grip on your waist almost bruising as he squeezes to ground himself. for the third time, he cums, spilling his seed inside you and painting your walls white.

his head falls back against the headboard of the bed once more, chest heaving erratically as spurts of cum shoot into you in thick ropes, and his mouth hangs open as he lets moans and choked curses spill freely. you lean and kiss his neck, sucking on the skin as you work him through his orgasm, and enji’s nerves are lighting up at every end with pleasure.

it’s not long before it turns to be too much, though, and his thighs are twitching and his back is arching at the overstimulation. you still haven’t cum yet, and he’s well on his way to his fourth peak of the night.

“t-too much, please it’s too much,�� he cries, and it hurts, his cock is spent and throbbing and he doesn’t know if he can cum another time. “it hurts, can’t…can’t cum again,” he pleads. but you’re quick to shush him, pulling him into another kiss, muffling his cries as he whimpers into your mouth.

“you can handle one more can’t you?” you ask softly, nipping at his bottom lip as you slam your hips down. you mewl as he hits your spot, making your walls squeeze around him tighter. and even as enji closes his eyes shut and protests, his hips are canting up, meeting your thrusts once more, cock and angry purple as it pulses in you. “you can give me one more, baby. c’mon, don’t you wanna be good? make me cum, enji,” you breathe, and your words shoot straight to his cock, twitching in your walls as you speak to him.

“yes,” he gasps, “yes, want you to cum. fuck, please.” he feels like his body’s on fire, hot to the touch—and it’s always been like that, but for once, he doesn’t feel like he’s burning everything he touches. his arms wrap around your figure, bringing you flush against his chest as his hips buck into your wet heat.

“fuck, enji! s-so close,” you whine, and his thumb finds your swollen clit once more, rubbing harshly and making you whimper into his chest, nails clawing at his shoulders as you let him take over. “please, cum with me, wanna feel you—fill me up, baby, please.”

something awakens in him, something so raw and carnal, it makes him let out a deep grunt as he slams his hips up into you desperately. he wants to fuck his load into you as much as he can—and flashes of a future where he can be better, where he is better, consume his mind. he thinks maybe you’re a second chance, a new beginning for the life he’s left behind. maybe with you, he can do the things he didn’t before—build a family with love, see happy smiles and hear cheery laughs, have sock-clad feet run up to him with hands held out to be lifted up, get greeted at the door with a giggly kiss, light things up instead of burning them down.

a family. maybe with you, he can have a family—a real one this time, one where he’ll do things right.

“fuck—g-gonna fill you up,” he stutters, head falling to your neck, and enji presses a soft peck to your skin. it’s something gentle, something sweet, something filled with love. “gonna give you a future—c-cause i love you,” he rasps.

he doesn’t know if he’s imagined it, but he’s almost certain he hears a breathy “i love you too,” and with one more thrust, he lets out a broken moan, you let out a shrill squeal, and you both shudder. your bodies clutch tightly onto each other as you peak, your walls spasm around him, and he spills his load into you for the second time, thrusting his hips so that he fucks his seed deep into you. your walls milk him of every last drop, cum spilling down your thighs and making a mess as you sloppily bounce on his cock and ride out your orgasm.

your body slumps over his figure, and his arms wrap around your waist. it’s quiet, save for your labored pants, and the lingering scent of sweat and sex clings to both of your skin as you calm your breathing, but the air shifts to something softer—more peaceful. enji feels your fingers trace patterns into his chest, and he cracks a light smile when you kiss his pec lightly and giggle.

it’s gentle when you kiss his jaw. it’s gentle when you wrap your arms around his neck. it’s gentle when you mold your body against his and cling to him.

it’s gentle. it’s not pain, and it’s not harsh, and it feels like he’s on top of the world.

you break the silence first. “you okay?” you ask, reaching up and cupping his jaw delicately. he nods, hand rubbing slow circles into the small of your back.

there’s something different in his voice as he speaks, and for the first time in his life, todoroki enji thinks he might have earned a spot that’s rightfully his. he face tilts, and he presses a soft peck to your palm—he thinks he wants to start making a habit of doing that more often.

“yes,” he murmurs, “i think i’m okay.”

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