#I’m trying so hard to decrease my sugar intake

[buckyownsmylife]

Je Veux - Tom Holland Smut

The one where Tom is a biker and you’ve been trying to get him to take your virginity, but he’s been keeping you away until the day you’re in need of a ride.

Warnings: pwp, motorcycles, loss of virginity, cursing, teasing from both sides, sexual activities in a public environment, a lot of dirty talk, impatient Tom, daddy kink, multiple orgasms, dominant Tom, possessive Tom, breeding kink

Word count: 3.1K

A/N: Okay, so here it is! My Tom Holland Biker! AU! It’s pretty much only smut, the plot was just sprinkled in there. I took A LOT of creative liberties with the whole motorcycle idea, mostly because I have no clue how they work, so just bear with me and pretend that everything I say is actually physically possible. Also, DO NOT TRY any of this at home, mostly because I’ve been burned by a motorcycle before and a lot of the positions described here can’t really be considered safe. Hope you guys like it nonetheless and don’t forget to let me know if you did and what else you want to read next! 

Tom’s P.O.V.

“Come on, princess. I’ll give you a ride home.” I watched with great pleasure as her eyes grew twice their normal size, her mind undoubtedly struggling to comprehend what I was offering. “Come on, now. Isn’t this what you wanted? Or are you finally prepared to admit that I’m better kept away?” I could see the precise moment my words sunk into her. Her eyes narrowed and she pursed her lips, her hands coming to cross in front of her body.

“Thank you for your offer, Tom. I would never say no to your offer for a ride.” The double entendre wasn’t lost on me, and I only started to realize my own mistake when she sized up the motorcycle. “I’ve never ridden one before. I’m going to need you to help me.” 

I gulped hard before cautiously approaching her, my own hands on my hips as I thought over this situation I had quite literally put myself into. “Am I supposed to ride in the front or in the back?” The question brought a smirk to my lips, reigniting the flames of mischief I had in me.

“Well, usually people would ride in the back, but with you, sugar…” I squeezed her jaw with my thumb and pointer finger. “... I can’t very well do that, now can I? You’re going upfront, so I can keep an eye on you, make sure you don’t fall out of the bike.”

The look she gave me let me know she knew for sure I had something up my sleeve, but nonetheless, I couldn’t wipe away the huge grin I bore on my face as I got up on the bike and waited for her to approach me. She did so, albeit slowly, clearly trying to get a grip over the situation. Poor thing didn’t know I’d never allow her that.

As soon as she was within reach, I picked her up, depositing her in front of me, her legs on each side of the motorcycle. I leaned down to kiss the back of her shoulder that was exposed to me, courtesy of the incredibly tempting sundress she had decided to wear, and that’s when she realized how screwed up she was.

“Oh.” Was all that I heard as she tried to adjust her skirt around us.

“Don’t worry, baby girl. I’ll keep it down around here.” And with that, I pressed myself against her more firmly, pressing a hand on her lower abdomen to make sure she’d feel my cock straining under my jeans. She didn’t say anything after that, which I took as an invitation to start up the bike.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

I wasn’t prepared for the shiver that went through my entire body as the machine’s engine came alive under me. Quickly, I realized what his plan was all about. He had pretty much sat me over a vibrator, even if it wasn’t a powerful one. As the bike purred under me, I started to tremble, and I had to be thankful for Tom’s strong thighs on each side of my body and his hands that caged me in.

“You’re not second-guessing yourself, right princess? ‘Cause this is exactly what you wanted.” He was right. This was what I had been asking him for ages, and now that he was giving me a taste of it, I could see why he thought it might be too much for me. But as my eyes rolled back and my body started to go limp against his, just as he was pulling up in front of my house, I knew he was wrong. This was all I had ever wanted. “There you go, princess. Now that your thirst is satiated, do you see how it’s pointless to keep tempting me?” These words were whispered against my neck, where he deposited another quick kiss. And that small gesture made me smile, because if anything was obvious after this little ride, was that he was hanging on by a thread when it came to his own desire for me.

I pulled one of his hands, placing it underneath my skirt, now fully relying on his strong body to keep me upright as I sank back into him. “Do you think I’ve ruined your motorcycle?” As his fingers came in contact with the wetness that was still dripping from me, moistening my panties that were now rubbing against the leather in our seat, I heard a sharp intake of breath.

“Shit.” Was all he said before his fingers grew more fidgety, and he rubbed my underwear against me, almost like he was testing the wetness. “Fuck,” he cursed again, and I released a long moan as one of his thick fingers bypassed the lace that kept him away from my emptiness and penetrated me with it.

Suddenly, there wasn’t enough air in the world to keep me alive and I was gasping as I struggled against him and the cage of his arms, desperate to keep the finger inside of me moving. It was the first time someone touched me like that and I was already on edge from my last orgasm, so I knew it would take very little for me to cum again.

“Fucking hell.” I heard him whisper right over my ear, eliciting goosebumps all over my body before he unceremoniously retreated his finger and started up the bike again.

Tom’s P.O.V.

“I have to see this.” It was all the explanation I gave her as I quickly took us up on one of the trails that started on the other side of the street, just opposite of her house. It was only ever in the summer that it was used, right when tourists strolled into town, so I knew the probability of us getting interrupted was minimal.

As soon as we reached a clearing, I turned off the motorcycle and climbed down, adjusting her so her body was now laid down over the seat, in the opposite direction it was facing before. “Now, princess… Let me take a look at this mess you’ve made.” Slowly, I inched up her skirt until it was completely out of the way and her panties were in full view. Besides the fact that they were fucking white lace, her moisture had completely glued them to her pussy lips, making it very clear that they were, in fact, ruined. “Oh, fuck.” I pressed my thumb against her clit, only to glance up at her in surprise when she whimpered underneath my simple touch. “You really haven’t been touched before, have you?”

Gathering some of the excess moisture, I lazily glided my fingers up and down her cunt while she trembled. “I told you that.” I huffed, my eyes now fixed on the movement I was making. 

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“Doesn’t mean I believed you.” I would have scoffed if I could, but as it were, his fingers had deftly pushed away my underwear so that he could penetrate me with a single finger again and all I could do was whimper. From the way that he bit down on his bottom lip, he seemed to have liked that very much, his eyes never straying from the place he was working on.

“Then…” a breathy sigh left my lips as he picked up his pace, thrusting his finger desperately inside my aching heat. “Then why did you avoid me? I thought you didn’t want to be my first.” That caught his attention, but fortunately, instead of clearing his mind, it seemed to have scrambled it even further.

“I didn’t, but that’s what’s going to happen now.” My heartbeat - that was already scary fast - picked up so quickly at his words that all at once I realized I was cumming around his finger, much to his delight. “Fuck yes, baby girl. I need you really wet if I’m going to get my cock inside of you, so here, take another finger.” Suddenly, I was choking on air, the new intrusion much more difficult to adjust to than the last one. Still, it was in no way an unpleasant sensation, and before long I was desperately thrusting back against him.

A loud moan escaped my lips at the dirty wet sounds from my pussy that got lost in the woods as he fingerfucked me against his bike. “Fuck,” he whispered, and I opened my eyes just enough to see that he had released his lower lip and was currently looking at me with dark eyes and an open mouth, from where labored breaths escaped. “Fucking cum already, I still need to open you up more before I fuck you and I feel like I’m going to burst any moment now.”

With that rant out of his chest, he picked up his pace, until I was, once again, trembling with desire underneath him. “There you go… One more finger, princess. Then you can have daddy’s cock.” I probably would have questioned the self-appointed nickname if it hadn’t made me moan out loud again. The smug idiot simply smirked, finally pushing one last finger in me, as promised, while I struggled yet again to accept the invasion. I was so focused on the pleasure he was giving me that I only realized he had pushed his jeans down and was playing with himself when his grunts reached my ears, forcing my eyes open in surprise.

He never stopped his movements on either of our bodies, but that cocky smile was back on his lips, despite the continuous breathless sounds escaping him at the sight of my widened eyes. He was huge, and so freaking hard, his red tip weeping precum while he caressed himself.

“You like it, baby girl?”

A breathless “mhmm” was all he could get from me at that moment.

“Do you want it inside of you?” A gasp echoed around the trees as his fingers grazed a particular spot that made me see white light.

“So, so much…” I whispered, just before succumbing to the pleasure once more.

He waited for me to come down to Earth, never stopping his movements on either of our bodies, but significantly decreasing the speed. When the last tremble of my thighs ceased, he finally pulled away from my pussy, and I tried not to whimper at the feeling of emptiness that overcame me - failing miserably. Thankfully, it allowed me to see another smirk break through Tom’s handsome face, as he appreciated the needy state he had put me in.

“Don’t worry, darling… I’ll take care of you.” And then I was in his arms again, and he was pulling me to stand up from the bike. As I did so, he wrapped his arms around me, his mouth meeting mine in a kiss that was pure desire and possession. I melted against him, allowing him full control of my body, because the truth was, I was his. I had been his for a long time now, and this moment was only solidifying it.

When we broke apart for air, he forcefully turned me around, pushing my back down so I’d lay over the seat of the bike again, only this time, with my breasts pressed against the seat I was once sat on.

Tom’s P.O.V.

“Oh, fuck.” That was all I could say as I took in the sight before me. I had pushed her skirt away so it wouldn’t be hiding anything from me anymore, but even though she still had her underwear on, I felt my knees buckling just from seeing her like that, her ass in the air, the lace sticking to her wet pussy.

Licking my lips, I quickly pushed down her panties until they pooled around her ankles and leaned down to taste her essence. “Oh…” Such a small noise, but it went straight to my cock, that was throbbing in my hand by now. She was such a fucking treasure. I wanted to ruin her. I’d make sure of it.

“Spread your fucking legs,” I growled, still intoxicated by her taste, and when she immediately struggled to obey me, separating her legs as far as the fabric around her ankles allowed her to do so, I buried my face on her pussy from behind, devouring her like she was the last meal I had been granted in this life.

“T-Tom!” She screamed, her fingers scrambling to tightly hold her up against the bike, while I could feel her legs shaking on both sides of my face.

“Shhh…” I tried to calm her down, one of my hands softly caressing the back of her thigh. “Let me get a taste of you, yeah? I told you I’ll take care of you, darling. Just relax.” I raised my other hand to squeeze her ass while struggling to keep her standing and still while my chin dripped with her juices. She tasted delicious. Better than those chocolate milkshakes she’d always order and I’d steal a sip from.

Her legs trembled more anxiously as I brought her to another release, and although I was tempted to keep my face buried in her and drink her release, I knew neither of us would resist much longer. So after she drenched my face with a strangled cry, I forced myself to rise from my position and take a much better spot, still behind her.

She kept trembling when I slowly pushed the head of my cock between her pussy lips, and I knew that her orgasm was still taking over her, but in some part in the depths of her desire, she felt as every inch of me slowly struggled to open her up to welcome me. I knew she was aware of what was happening, that I was taking her virginity just like she’d begged me to do for months, only it was in the middle of a forest and on top of my bike, but she was too weak to express any sort of reaction other than another weak “Oh”, as she fought to keep herself up against the motorcycle.

“Yes, baby,” I whispered as I finally bottomed out, after what felt like hours, but couldn’t have been more than a couple of minutes. My right hand came up to caress the back of her head, hoping to help her relax and better accept my intrusion, and as I felt the muscles of her thighs soften, I took advantage of my grip on her hair to pull her up against me. “See, princess? Just like that, you’re not a virgin anymore.”

She gasped, but if it was due to my words or the way I pushed her down against the bike again, I’ll never know, because I’d done enough waiting. It was time to start moving. Despite feeling like I desperately needed to fuck her, wildly, untamedly, I kept my movements slow, at least at first. I didn’t want her hurting any more than she had to. So I moved at a snail’s pace, making sure she’d feel every inch of my cock as I slowly dragged it out of her, just to push it in again.

When her somewhat pained whimpers subsided, giving place to loud moans of pleasure, I started to pick up my movements. My hands held her hips tightly, unworried about leaving marks behind because I knew she’d be left with much more than that after I was done with her.

“Does this feel good, baby girl? Do you like the feeling of my cock stuffed in your tight little pussy?” My filthy words made her moan.

“Y-yes…” She was able to breathe out.

“That’s good, baby, you know why?” I teased her, my fingers digging even deeper into her perfect skin. 

“N-no.”

“Because the only man who’ll ever get to fill you will be me, princess. You’ll only ever know what my cock feels like.”

Y/N’s P.O.V.

I whined in appreciation as one of Tom’s hands found my clit and started rubbing. This was precisely what I wanted, to experience him in the most primal way possible. Knowing that being inside of me made him want to make me his left me a mess, and I couldn’t stop sobbing as he started to thrust into me violently, the tip of his cock hitting my cervix almost furiously. “F-fuck, Tom!” His groans were animalistic, and his pace never faltered, despite my obviously pained moans.

“Cum for me, princess. Milk me for all I’m worth. I want to fill your womb with my cum.” His words did it for me. I came with a desperate scream of his name, and just when my senses started to come back to me, I heard him moan my name before feeling a warmth spread from inside of me.

My legs were trembling, so I felt thankful that he was still holding me up. Still, he never pulled away from me, instead pulling me so my back was against his chest. He deposited sweet kisses against my sweaty neck, while I tried to catch my breath.

“T-tom,” I decided to call his attention to the problem before it was too late. “You came inside of me.”

My only response was a dismissive “mhm”, while he kept on sucking on my skin, one of his hands fondling my heaving breast.

“Tom,” I tried again. “You know I’m not in any sort of contraceptive method.” That finally made him raise his head, and I closed my eyes tightly, prepared for some sort of outburst, but all I got was a low chuckle.

“Which part of ‘you’re mine’ didn’t you understand? I know you’re not protected, that’s why I made sure to cum inside of you.” My mind wasn’t keeping up with him, and I wasn’t sure if I could attribute it solely to how thoroughly he had fucked me.

I supposed he noticed my confusion, because before I could understand what was going on, he was turning me around and picking me up so I could sit on the bike again, facing him. His hands brushed a few stray strands out of my face, and he smiled so sweetly at me that it almost made me forget I still had his cum dripping down my thigh.

“Now no one can keep us apart, baby girl. Not even your parents. And everyone will know you belong to me.” He sealed his promise with another deep kiss and I knew right then that I’d made the right choice by accepting his ride. Now I’d get to be forever his.

[iviethings]

🔥🚀 LOSE 10LB IN A WEEK🚀🔥

*here’s the diet I’ll be doing*

Wanna Lose 10lbs fast? I introduce to you…

The ‘Blast Off’ Diet!

blast off your weight with this diet. how it works is that the diet takes place over a period of 7 days (6 of which are dieting days and the 7th is a reserve day which i’ll cover in more detail below!) and each day we countdown our calorie intake by 100 calories until we reach 0 calories and we ‘blast off’ with a fast! Obviously like any diet the end results may differ due to everyone being different so don’t @ me if your results differ but when I did one cycle (6 days) I lost about 10lbs (approx 4.5kgs).

I find this so much easier than the 2,4,6,8 diet or the other diets where day 1 is the lowest amount of calories and it increases during the designated period. By starting with the highest amount of calories that you will consume and the slow decrease over the period of a week makes the diet easier to get into as you can ease yourself in and those early days are critical because that is usually when we give up because it seems too hard.

🔥 RULES 🔥

No going above the daily calorie limit

if you do go above the calorie limit then you have to take however many calories that you went over off the next day

no binging and purging (please don’t)

spitting and chewing is allowed, but stay safe, please.

there are no specific foods you can and can’t eat, just ensure that it doesn’t go over the daily limit

drink 8 big glasses of water each day (2Litres at least)

drink at least 2 cups of green tea each day

try your hardest to get enough sleep so that you can lose the weight quicker

if you mess up there is always tomorrow! I know its hard to not beat yourself up when you mess up (I do it too) but we’re only humans, and you are beautiful!

weigh in every 1-2 days and record your progress.

when fasting please be safe and keep it to 24 hours but if you feel up to it then you can extend your fast over to day 7 (but NO LONGER than that)

at any time during this entire process if you feel unsafe then I’d recommend sucking on a throat lozenge for blood sugar or having a some sodium - drinking loaded zero really helps me and is only 12 calories for a litre but gives you the electrolytes you’d get from roughly 2 gatorades.

🚀 FOR THE DIET… 🚀

Day One: 500 Calories

50 Sit-ups

50 Bicycle Crunches

60 side leg lefts (each side)

70 lying down squats

80 hip raises

90 Waist widdlers

60 second plank

2X30 minute walks - or alternatively 12,000 steps

Day Two: 400 Calories

60 Sit-ups

50 bicycle crunches

70 side leg lefts (each side)

80 lying down squats

85 hip raises

95 Waist widdlers

65 second plank

2X35 minute walks - or alternatively 12,000 steps

Day Three: 300 Calories

70 Sit-ups

50 bicycle crunches

80 side leg lefts (each side)

85 lying down squats

90 hip raises

100 Waist widdlers

70 second plank

2X40 minute walks - or alternatively 12,000 steps

Day Four: 200 Calories

80 Sit-ups

50 bicycle crunches

90 side leg lefts (each side)

95 lying down squats

95 hip raises

100 Waist widdlers

75 second plank

2X45 minute walks - or alternatively 12,000 steps

Day Five: 100 Calories

90 Sit-ups

50 bicycle crunches

100 side leg lefts (each side)

100 lying down squats

100 hip raises

100 Waist widdlers

80 second plank

2X50 minute walks - or alternatively 12,000 steps

Day Six: 0 Calories (fast)

Don’t do any of the exercises that you would do on the other days of the diet. We want you to be beautiful and safe, not over exhausted and passed out. Although if you want to stay moving then you can do 30 Side leg lifts (each side)

Day Seven: RESERVE DAY

I put Day 7 into the cycle for the situation if there is no possible ways for you to avoid having to face your fear. This might be because someone’s birthday is approaching or a special occasion is coming up. If not, then this is your REST DAY. Take a break from the diet on this day and get yourself ready to start back at Day One (if you wish to follow the cycle again)  

If you have any questions, don’t be afraid to ask! my messages are always open! i’m not pro anything just trying to cope so if you don’t like what you see block don’t report. If you want to follow this diet then make sure you tag @thenewerclientele (me) in your progress posts and if you want to share this diet plan with anyone or make any changes then make sure that give me credit and share any alterations that you have made with me because I’d be really interested to see what changes you have made!!

I wish you all the best of luck with this diet and I hope that it can bring you joy in some shape or form. You all deserve to recover and you’re all so beautiful but I know that we all have our targets and that this is a really shitty time for all of us.

Please, please, please stay safe and if you feel like you are in danger at any point during blast off then stop immediately and nourish yourself with something safe.

make sure you follow @thenewerclientele for more updates, thinspo, diets and safe recipes.- J

[alliswell21]

Remorse and Absolution

For @lovely-tothe-bone. Sorry it took me so long.

Rated T, for mentions of canonical violence, and implied intimate encounters.

>>————->

The evening starts as usual: we cook dinner together, set the table and one of us runs to Haymitch’s to drag him over for supper. After dinner, Peeta and Haymitch play a few turns of their permanent chess game set up in the study, while I tackle the dirty dishes, since I’m feeling generous.

I join the guys in the study when I’m done in the kitchen, and curl up in a cozy chair with a book my mother sent from District 4 a while ago. It’s an easy read, just a few poems about flowers and plants that usually keeps my mind relaxed and distracted. The guys share a few quiet chuckles, and I smile at my book absentmindedly. I can’t help it. Laughter sometimes feels a little alien to us, but the sound is becoming more and more frequent with every season that passes.

Dr. Aurelius isn’t completely useless after all. He’s encouraged us to keep simple routines in our day to day, and so far we’ve found it beneficial for all of us.

After a while, Haymitch starts bouncing his leg anxiously. A clear sign he’s ready for a drink, and since Peeta and I discourage the use of liquor in our house, the old man cracks his knuckles and calls it a night after moving his piece. I wish we could break him out of the habit, but we all have our coping mechanisms; Haymitch’s happens to be at the bottom of a bottle. At least his alcohol intake has decreased some since he started raising his geese. The feathered monsters can be a handful tough, but they keep Haymitch preoccupied enough to stay sober at times.

I count that as a plus.

“I’ll walk you home.” Peeta tells Haymitch as soon as our old mentor stands from his rocking chair. His tone is casual, jovial even, but Haymitch and I know Peeta so well, we pick up the hidden message. He wants a word, privately.

“Sure. It’s been a long day, and I may need an extra pair of hands to help me secure the geese’s hatch. The stupid birds keep pecking at it. Soon they’ll be running wild all over the place.” Haymitch drawls, scratching his chin.

His sharp Seam eyes search Peeta’s countenance before cutting to me in something that could pass as boredom, if wasn’t for the way his eyebrow twitches.

I shrug infinitesimally, letting him know that I neither know what’s Peeta up to, or have any objections on the matter.

Haymitch shrugs too, and plucks an apple turnover from a plate by their chess table. “Sweetheart,” He nods and salutes me, stuffing his mouth obnoxiously full of pastry. He slouches out of the room beckoning Peeta to follow him. “Alright, Boy, lets get on with it. That hatch ain't gonna fix itself.”

By the time Peeta comes back, I’m getting ready for bed.

He joins me in the bathroom, as another of our nightly routines, we take turns using the toilet and then wash our faces and brush our teeth together at the sink. It should feel strange going to the bathroom with a boy, but after moving in together and becoming a real couple, Peeta and I have grown comfortable with each other— in my case— comfortable enough to be human in front of him.

I keep looking at him through the mirror over the sink though. He’s been uncharacteristically quiet since returning from Haymitch’s.

“Everything okay?” I ask around a mouthful of toothpaste.

“Hmm.” He grunts in ascent, switching water in his mouth before spitting it out. “Yeah.” He says, but sounds unconvinced.

I rinse my mouth and dry my lips with a towel, still studying his face while he tidies up the counter.

“You know you can tell me if anything is bothering you, right?” I say unraveling my braid and combing out the strands with my fingers.

“I know.” He tells me softly. After a minute, he stutters a breath. “It’s just… I don’t wanna bother ‘you’.” He says looking at me sheepishly, and then stands behind me with my hair brush.

He loves helping me brushing and rebranding my hair, so I let him do it every night. He’s gotten almost as good as I too. Normally, this is my favorite time of our grooming routine. Having him play with my hair relaxes and soothes me like nothing else; but tonight I just stew in his words.

I come to the conclusion that whatever’s on his mind, has to be awful for him to think he’ll upset me by it.

I scowl, and dig deep for some courage; after all he’s done for me, the least I can do is repay his kindness and help him out, even if it’s something that could potentially send me cowering under the covers for days.

“Peeta,” I turn to face him, running my hand up and down his muscled arm. “We’re in this together. No matter what. You can tell me anything.” I tell him honestly.

He sighs heavily.

He holds my hand and together we walk into our bedroom. He motions for me to sit on the bed, then lowers himself next to me. It takes him another moment to gather his thoughts, finally, his eyes find mine, holding my whole attention.

“Today in my call with Dr. Aurelius, we talked about apologizing to people I’ve physically hurt. Even if they’re not around anymore.”

“Oh,” I breathe out. “That’s a tall order. I’m so sorry, Peeta.” I say taking his hand in mine. By my count, all the people Peeta ever touched violently, died right after. “It must’ve been hard for you, trying to make amends like that.”

He shakes his head. “It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I mean, I felt myself slipping at one point, but I managed to stay in my own mind…” he trails off, his blue eyes glass over, and for a moment I’m frightened an episode is coming, but then his eyes refocus on me. And it’s not better when he holds my gaze.

So much sadness and guilt, a chill runs up my spine.

“Apologizing to the dead wasn’t the hard part.” He confesses softly, gently. “There’s one person I hurt, who’s still here, breathing. Alive. The problem is she’s the hardest one to even start talking to, because I can’t quite remember what happened, or what was actually said or done to trigger the attack.” Peeta’s voice breaks a little, his eyes intense on mine. “My mind was so confused. Whatever happened during those moments when fear gripped my like a vice, is fogged up in my memory, and some people may say is for the better, because who’ll want to know the monstrosities one is capable of…?”

I try to remain oblivious to what he’s saying, but his meaning is hard to miss when spoken with such vehemence.

He continues, “What I know about the incidents, is only what I was told by others. At first, I didn’t believe a word of it.” He shakes his head and looks away in shame for a moment, “Not until I saw footage of myself acting like a rabid mutt. A madman, killing an innocent just to get to a defenseless girl, who didn’t do anything to hurt me. Not really.”

My heartbeat quickens at his words. Pain and fear snake around my chest, wrapping tightly over my heart, and breathing becomes a chore. I shake my head, “It wasn't like that... it wasn’t—“ a small noise, like a sob, cuts the rest of my words short.

“Katniss,” this time is Peeta squeezing my hand in his. “We don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to. As I said, the last thing I want, is to upset you.”

I shake my head and manage to croak out, “No, Peeta, I think we have to. I’m not terribly keen on remembering those days, but like everything in our lives, we need to face our fears and stop pretending they’re not there.” I squeeze my eyes shut for a second. “What do you need to know?” I ask before my resolve disappears.

“I’m not sure. Honestly, I want nothing less than to know all the awful things I did and said to you then, Sweetheart. But it feels wrong, hypocritical, apologizing to you without first owning my crimes and shortcomings.”

My heart breaks a little. For both of us.

All the mess up stuff done to us, and even now we have to fight to get away from the pain they caused us.

“Is that why you wanted to speak to Haymitch alone?” I ask, “To learn from him what happened that day? The day you—“ my hand goes to my neck involuntarily, but the words I whisper are less threatening, less damning. “The day you were rescued from the Capitol,”

Peeta sighs a tremulous “Yes.” After a pause, he explains, quietly, “I had to know, and Haymitch wouldn’t sugar coat it or lie about it to spare my sanity.” We’re silent for a moment and then he brings my hand to his lips. “I’m sorry I let them turn me into that monster, Katniss.”

I’m not sure what exactly happens next, but one soft, apologetic kiss, turns into two, three, six, ten. His lips hover, feather like, over the skin of my wrist, traveling to my forearm and then keeps going up to my shoulder. Our eyes stay entranced unto one another, as much as we can sitting like we are. An unbreakable connection. The apology is etched in the depths of his intense blue eyes, and I don’t have the power to look away or deny him this.

Sitting side by side, requires some readjustment when Peeta’s kisses reach my neck. My eyes finally shut when his hot breath fans over the place my skin tingles with the memory of finger shaped bruises.

“I’m so sorry, Katniss.” He murmurs against my throat. “I’m sorry I became a piece in their games.” His kisses go from tight lipped, to open mouthed, and his hand cups my cheek to keep my head in place as he paints apologies over my neck and throat.

“I’m sorry I let them turn me against you, darling.” His free hand wraps around my waist lightly, “I allowed them to turn me into a weapon, to destroy you. I’m sorry my mind was so warped, they almost succeeded.”

“But you’re better now,” I exclaim wrapping my fingers around his, abruptly turning to face him completely.

My eyes fill with tears because his real self is here, with me, and none of the schemes the Capitol or Coin tried to use, to put us as odds with each other, worked.

They lost! And against the odds, we won. Another day this victory will seem empty and small, but not tonight. Tonight, knowing Peeta reclaimed his mind back and came home to help me do the same, is all that matters.

“You’re better now,” I repeat, and then is me kissing his mouth, holding him tight, “You’re you. My Peeta. My sweet, tender Boy with the bread.” Every word is marked with a peck to his lips, cheeks, eyes. “They couldn’t break you, not completely. You broke free at the end. You brought yourself back to me.”

He pulls me flushed against him then. “Oh, Sweetheart, I’ll always come back to you. You’re my entire life. My safe heaven. My home.”

“And you are mine.”

We lean into each other. Our kisses rapidly escalates from reassuring press of the lips, to hungry exploration of each other’s mouths.

Our bodies slowly lower to the mattress; our hands roam freely under sleep wear and my fingers tangle in his soft hair. We move fluidly, in familiar, comforting motions together.

Peeta kisses my jawline up and down; one warm hand slides from my side, up to my shoulder and around to caress over my collarbones with gentle, loving fingers.

“I don’t think I will ever be able to stop apologizing for hurting you,” He says placing small kisses behind my ear. “Hijacked or not.” He nudges me back, until my head falls on my pillow. “But I pledge to spend the rest of my life trying.” He promises before shifting himself to hover above me.

I cradle his hips between mine, but Peeta contents himself with just resting his weight there while his clever, caring fingers massage the skin on my neck tenderly.

“Please, Katniss. Could you ever forgive me for what I did? I keep trying to picture myself wrapping my hands around your neck with the intent to harm you, and I just—”

“I know. That wasn’t you.” I tell him caressing his face.

His eyes shine with unshed tears. “But maybe it was though.” He says miserably. “Everyone keeps saying they use venom to twist my feelings for you until I couldn’t even recognize myself, but what if the hatred and resentment had been there all along? There’s an all consuming rage deep within me, Katniss. It ran in my mother’s veins. I could feel it in mine too, dormant, simmering beneath the surface. I kept a short leash on it when I could help it, but the Capitol found it, dug it out, and magnified it to use against you. How could you ever forgive me for almost choking the life out of you?”

“Peeta,” I sigh to the ceiling, curling my fingers into the hair at his nape, bringing his face deeper into the crook of my neck where I can keep him safe from himself, “I forgave you the moment you remembered your promise of ‘Always’.” I tell him looping my other arm around his shoulder. “I forgave you because your true self is kind, and loving, and sweet. Maybe there is anger and rage inside you, but your selflessness is far greater. Your will power is what makes me love you. You came back from the mutt, and that’s why forgiving you was so easy. You didn’t let it eat you up like Snow and Coin expected. You’re stronger than that.”

How could I ever doubt a boy who’s always put my well-being before his own? How could I believe he would purposely hurt me, when his actions spoke so loudly to the contrary in the past?

To show him I trust him intrinsically and accept his apology without reservations, I tilt my head back, presenting him with my bare throat. I don’t care if this position leaves me vulnerable, I know he loves me, and despite all those walls I built around my heart to keep me from falling in love, I’ve finally admitted, I love him back.

“Thank you, Katniss. For having faith in me. For giving me another chance and not giving up on me in those sewers.”

“You didn’t give up on me either. I think we are finally on leveled ground.”

I feel his smile against my cheek before his lips find my own.

“I will still spend the rest of my life, making it up to you, Sweetheart.” He whispers into my jaw, his other hand joins the sweet ministrations of the first one, pouring his devotion into each one of his light touches over my clavicle and throat, as if trying to sooth the memory of the bruises away… he may just manage to erase them for good if he keeps kissing me like this.

He’s etching his adoration and love for me with so much reverence on every inch of flesh he can reach.

His caresses and kisses descend from my face to my clavicle, his hands move the thin material of my night shirt down my arms, revealing yet more skin, and his reverent kisses turn into hungry nips and pecks, that only serves to make our hunger greater. Our hands seek more skin, more warmth, more friction, not quite satisfying.

We’ve made love almost every night since the day I told him my love for him is real, but tonight, when we join our bodies and become one, is different. With every gasp, caress and whispered promise, we make right a wrong, and put a painful episode behind us. We heal, forgive, and forget.

As his strokes and soothes my neck with tender touches, I know in my heart, that we will be okay.

We still have a long road ahead of us. What we went through has left deep wounds physical and emotional, that won’t heal overnight; we will have to work very hard to overcome guilt, sadness, and anger, but tonight, we’ve grown in our love, and that’s one more reason to smile than we had yesterday.

Maybe one day laughter won’t be alien anymore.

[helloh2o-posts-blog]

Hello fasting, bye sugar!

Hello! Welcome to my blog! Today, we’re going to talk about the crazy addiction we have when it comes to ADDED SUGAR. I would like to talk about decreasing our sugar intake and about getting started with Intermittent Fasting. Take a seat and a sip of H2o and let’s get into good health together!

Like you, I am stuck in this quarantine. One day, I started to do my homework assignments to help the time pass. I get my laptop, my agenda, and I started taking notes. I started to get hungry so I went to the fridge to grab a lemonade and I got a few cookies from the pantry. As I sipped my cold lemonade I realized how happy I was. As I bit into my chocolate chip cookies I realized my body started to feel excited but then it went back into a slum after I was finished having a snack. That’s when I realized that in this quarantine there are probably others who are struggling with their eating patterns. I realized that this small nudge of sugar was not as small as I thought… I was not only snacking in the morning, but I also was late at night. I knew that this was unhealthy and I knew I wanted to make a change for myself.

I introduced myself to INTERMITTENT FASTING and honestly it was the best gift I could give myself! According to Harvard Health, sugar is in almost everything we eat. It is also in fruits and vegetables and offers energy to our hard working cells. Americans everywhere, including myself, eat way too much sugar which puts us at risk for diabetes and heart disease. Intermittent fasting has helped me decrease my sugar intake. It helped me watch my caloric intake and had me feeling better both mentally and physically. With all of us struggling to maintain our health during quarantine, I wanted to share the top 5 benefits of intermittent fasting. I want to invite you guys to try intermittent fasting so that you too can feel your best while struggling to stay at home.

According to Healthline, intermittent fasting or IF has been around for centuries. Thousands of years ago, our ancestors would hunt for meals and go short and long periods without eating. IF allowed them to be at peak health and thus they survived through history for years and years. IF means to “cycle between periods of eating and fasting.” It can vary from person to person and certain cycles may hold different results for  each person. According to Healthline, one of the greatest benefits of IF is that it promotes blood sugar control and decreases our risk for diabetes. IF helps to decrease our blood sugar levels and allows our cells to properly rest and process energy more appropriately. A second health benefit is that IF can help reduce inflammation. Because the goal of fasting is to eat less and decrease your caloric intake, that means giving your stomach and digestive system a rest. As a result, it was found that those who fasted for some periods of time had less inflammation. A third health benefit of IF is that it can help enhance heart health by improving cholesterol levels and blood pressure levels. Those who did IF showed reduced levels of bad cholesterol by 25%. IF was also proven to lower the risk of diabetes AND coronary heart disease. This 4th health benefit deserves some critique. Healtlhine mentions that in a study of mice for a period of 11 months, the mice who did IF had better brain function and brain structure. While that finding is positive, it was not proven from a sample of humans. Although IF is said to help with brain function and structure I believe more proof needs to be given in order for it to be an actual proven health benefit. A fifth health benefit was that IF promoted increased weight loss and that it boosts the metabolism. I find this to be the most satisfying and most true health benefit of it all.

A few of my girlfriends and myself had weighed ourselves before our intermittent fasting journey. For myself in particular, I found that these health benefits were true. I started intermittent fasting in early march in order to decrease my caloric intake and specifically to decrease the amount of sugar I ate. The first month of IF and reducing sugar intake is the HARDEST! Something I have found is that many health articles never tell you how hard it is to become better. I want to tell you from personal experience that GETTING HEALTHY IS HARD BUT IT IS NOT IMPOSSIBLE. After struggling to fast for a few periods, at the end of my first month it finally started to get easier. I slowly realized that after 3-4 weeks of fasting I did not have an urge to snack or to grab a sugary beverage. I was feeling lighter and like I had more agility when I woke up each morning. At the start of my journey I was close to 140 pounds.  Now that I have been intermittent fasting for close to 3 months I have dropped close to 10 pounds. The hardest part for me -and I’m sure for others- is not eating past your fasting times. It is super important to know that just because you mess up one day, it is not the end of the world! It is okay if you disrupt a meal period, my advice would be to understand that these things happen, and to start strong again the next day.

It is easy to feel discouraged and that is why I wanted to share my small journey with you. I, too, had many times where I wanted to give up, but I knew I wanted to make an impactful change. Being hoarded inside the house for months can be hell when you are tempted by so many snacks and foods. I want to tell you that you can overcome the need to reach in your cupboard. That you can overcome your addiction to sugar no matter how big or small. Know that it will be a journey that will contain bumps in the road. Healthy articles and healthful instagram pages make it seem like it is successful the first time around. Whether it is easy for you or something you think you can’t do, Im here to say YOU CAN. YOU CAN INTERMITTENT FAST. YOU CAN OVERCOME A SUGAR ADDICTION. YOU CAN TAKE CHARGE OF YOUR HEALTH.

Stay awesome, and stay hydrated ;)

-helloh2o-posts

Attached articles:

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/fasting-benefits#section5

https://www.health.harvard.edu/heart-health/the-sweet-danger-of-sugar

[hecallsmehischild]

On Losing Weight

Recently I was asked a question that prompted me to pull together all the information I could remember about how my husband, Sergey, and I have been eating over the last few years. We both struggle very much with food and have been trying to do better by our bodies for a long time, but are wary of all the diets and fads. This post has details about what we’ve tried to date and what has worked for us. Most of it is written by me. At the end, Sergey wrote a few paragraphs also. Very long post under the cut.

Disclaimers and a few generalities

One thing about eating and weight loss is that accountability really helps. However, I’ve found personally that even if everyone in your family means well, accountability partners should not be within the family. The main reason I've found is that there's too much baggage with any family member (with the potential exception of your marriage partner) for accountability to ever go well and function as it should. Resentment, triggers, irritation, even accidental shaming crops up because of old baggage and derails everything. You need accountability with someone who you don’t carry a lot of baggage with, because there’s often a huge emotional component to eating.

It takes a LONG time to lose large amounts of weight. You can lose five to ten pounds relatively quickly, but often your body will stabilize on the new number and then you may find it very hard to get lower for months, so continuing to try new things is helpful.

You will yo-yo between 3 and 5 pounds all the time. That is standard. So think in five pound increments in any direction, because your bodyweight is constantly in flux over a few pounds. For this reason, weighing once a week is a lot more accurate than weighing every day and will cause a lot less despair and frustration.

We are not vegetarians at all. We cannot offer any thoughts on a vegetarian diet.

Whatever you do, food-wise, has to be part of your ordinary life. Short term diets set you up to fail. Changing your lifestyle is what will produce long-lasting changes.

Also, some of the things my husband and I try, in some ways, appears to walk the line of eating disorder. I’m watching it very closely with that in mind, and I still don’t think it falls into the trap. Sergey and I do not have enough activity to burn off all the food with take in, so we’re trying things to decrease our food intake AND increase our activity, so that we reach a reasonable balance. But people who have (or are tempted by) eating disorders need to take care, and I would recommend not reading this post or else proceeding with utmost caution.

Obviously not all of the things we do are feasible for everyone, but maybe even hearing some of our ideas might spark a different way of thinking about food and being active for you.

One Meal a Day

Three meals a day makes a lot of sense if you’re doing hard labor all the time. It doesn’t make as much sense if you have a desk job or take care of a house as your main occupation. So the first thing we did a few years back is cut down to one meal a day. It could be anything at all, but it had to be just one meal. That alone dropped us both about 10 pounds down. We’d have one meal around lunch, and later in the evening we would share a large bowl of some sort of fruit (like tangerines or cherries). The aim was to eat things that were both good and filling. Variation keeps you from getting bored and abandoning the lifestyle.

Meals were often grilled salmon or home-warmed burgers (lean, when we could) or a soup from Trader Joe’s. Some of our meals now:

Two burgers with lean beef patties, pickles, and some mayo on bakery fresh onion rolls

Lox (with is VERY low cal, if expensive) on onion rolls with tomato and onion, a little oil and pepper and salt

Sharing a whole roast chicken from the store, plus a roll each

Large can of tuna mixed with a little mayo on two onion rolls

Shredded chicken and mashed potatoes from the store’s fresh packaged food section

Pot roast and mashed potatoes from the store’s fresh packaged food section

Meatballs. Just meatballs.

A spicy beans/rice/sausage/mushroom dish we brainstormed that we make in a pressure cooker

Home-made chicken mushroom fettuccine alfredo. Not super healthy, but hot and homemade. (this is a “maintenance” meal, see what I mean by that later)

A bag of chicken fried rice from Trader Joe’s

Soup from the grocery store (not the canned kind, but the fresher ones sold by the store)

Two larger sized tamales

One frozen pizza (inspect the full calorie count, you’re shooting for something between 600 and 1000 calories total, which does exist but it takes some looking and experimenting with types) whose flavor can always be spiced up with extra mushrooms or garlic powder. Not the Tostino’s or Party pizzas. I promise there are healthier, tastier, and more varied pizzas to be had in this calorie range.

Chicken breast or chicken thigh meat is sold frozen. Cook that and make that into sandwiches for very lean, filling meals. Use of various spices encouraged.

A tray of baked “catfish nuggets” which are chunks of catfish cooked in the oven

A tray of baked white meat chicken nuggets

Cocktail shrimp (thawed from frozen) with cocktail sauce

I have just broken into the frontier of omelettes, also low-cal and filling in conjunction with onion rolls.

Sergey would often go to a salad bar and load up on the salad, then also load up on the chicken noodle soup which is very filling and very low cal.

Sergey eats his meal closer to noon or one. I try to eat my meal around 3 or 4 if I can hold out, because then I’m not groaning about how hungry I am in the evening or being kept up by hunger pangs. For me, that’s the mid-point of the day and the one that helps me deal with hunger best.

Snacks and Sweets

Snacks are always tricky, and large bags of anything salty are automatic failures in this house; we are incapable of portioning them. So we stopped getting them unless we acknowledged the truth to ourselves, which is that one bag is one serving size no matter what the back says (i.e. we embraced that we’re being bad and got it anyway).

For a while Sergey and I had an occasional bowl of non-buttered popcorn with powdered salt. This worked for a bit because it was pretty filling, but Sergey found himself making multiple bowls so we had to stop because that defeated the purpose.

Some stores sell very small snacks individually portioned, like a tiny foil pack of variously flavored olives, or banana bites coated in cacao, etc. Those are great. Rice cakes can be good, though I get tired of them after a while. I like the cinnamon apple and chocolate ones best. Speaking of cinnamon apple, individual oatmeal cups are good too. I aim for around 140 cal for a snack.

Sometimes I will snack on a lean burger patty or chicken thigh-meat piece, each of which is about 70 cal.

By himself, Sergey often would (and still does) fill a large bowl full of small quartered tomatoes mixed with pepper, oil, and onion. He can put away two of these tomato salads a day as “snacks.” He says they’re very filling, good for you, and low-cal. He’s leaning more on bowls of baby carrots and sugar snap peas these days. Sometimes he will make a large bowl of Golden Apple slices to chow down on.

I keep NO ice cream in the house. I may get a larger quantity for a birthday celebratory binge, or use individual containers as a reward system, but I never “stock up” on ice cream. Birthday? Maybe 4 of the personal containers of various flavors, and that’s it for my birthday treat. Reward system? Once I get to a certain weight, I allow myself to have one small personal container of ice cream (or my other favorite, a jar of honey pecans) a week. The incentive to get to a certain weight balances out the slow-down on the weight loss the treat causes, because this can’t be all about deprivation or I couldn’t sustain it. Being able to sustain a way of eating into a lifestyle is a huge deal.

I keep dried cranberries in the cabinet. Sometimes if I’m hungry and need to hold out, I’ll grab one handful of those to eat. I keep larger quantities of oatmeal too, but I’m not sure if that’s working against me or not, because I dump high quantities of honey in to bring it up to my sweet tooth standards so it might end up being a bad thing for me. I haven’t sat down to figure that out yet.

I make a mean chunky cinnamon applesauce that is a delicious and pretty healthy snack, too, when I have the energy to make it.

I would like to make sweets all the ding dong day, but it works against us, so I have to reserve my sweets making for when there’s a large group to share them with. Otherwise we would eat all of that ourselves.

Tools that help

Making your own food at home becomes a lot more enjoyable and feasible for low-energy people like us when there are tools that cut back on the effort it takes. To that end

A good 6 qt pressure cooker does everything a crockpot does, but it has more options and is faster.

A good food processor can do almost anything, from applesauce to milling oats to slicing veggies to finely dicing the onions you don’t want to deal with, to making ice cream out of frozen bananas and cocoa powder. We have an older one and it still does wonders, even though some of the latches don’t work right.

A good indoor grill machine.

Electric mixer/beater. The effort of making cookies goes down by a third to a half the personal energy cost when you use this, plus the process goes faster and the texture is so much better.

A dishwasher. A good dishwasher means you aren’t spending a ton of energy cleaning up all the dishes you soiled just making food. Did you know there are portable dishwashers that hook up to your sink if you don’t have one in the home? I just learned this...

This one heavily depends on how much you’d use it, but it can be very inexpensive to get an electric citrus juicer. I can go through about 40 lemons for a party-sized quantity of lemonade and it wracks out my wrist to do that manually, so I got a good one for about $20.

This website is one Sergey uses to see what products are legitimately good, because Amazon is starting to have major issues with fake reviews PLUS Chinese knock-offs getting passed off as the good product. This site user-tests a ton of different brands of the same product and tells you which one they found to be best and why, then gives a few runners up in other categories like price or different type. I used this to find a good set of salt/pepper grinders, a good knife sharpener, and an individual serving coffee maker. I also found my electric mixer and citrus juicer on here.

Also, pickling things is fun and very cheap and easy.

A few radical things

This is our lifestyle, not a diet. We go crazy with our eating when we’re on a trip, but normal, everyday eating is the one-meal-a-day plan for us. Going to a friend’s place for a meal is a balancing act that we often fail (because it’s often all-you-can-eat), but we’re already brainstorming ways to compensate.

Here’s for something radical sounding, to be handled with care. While Sergey aims for around 1300 calories a day, approximately, I aim for under or close to 800. I’ve found that if I eat the same things as him, I maintain my current weight but do not lose any. It’s when I, the smaller and less active person, undershoot him, that I start gaining ground. When I reach the weight I’m aiming for, I will allow myself more leeway to get to his calorie intake level, because that’s “maintenance” level for me.

Here’s the current thing we are testing, so the results are not in yet. We’re doing this because neither of us has been able to budge our weight for a while. It’s a combination of factors so track with me. We like a place called Star Cinema Grill which is a movie theater that serves you a meal and/or drinks while you watch the movie. But even for one meal this is a very high calorie day if we go there. We swore off going for a long time, until their marketing department sent out a wave of “Two free tickets!” in the mail. Sergey figured that he would go, and then he would not eat for 48 hours to make up for it. I was a little concerned by the idea, but after thinking it over for a while (with the concern about eating disorders in mind) it didn’t actually seem that unreasonable. So I joined him in this. So now we’ve worked out that we can go to Star Cinema Grill on occasion as long as it’s followed by a 48 hour fast.

We had previously tried 48 hour fasts (which consist of, for example, eating lunch around noon on Sunday and stopping food until lunch on Tuesday, so that you sleep through much of the 48 hour period) but we first did the fast on ONLY water. By the second day we were both so lethargic and unfocused that we could hardly function. This time we allowed ourselves to have several rounds of tea or mocha throughout the day. That time, we experienced very negligible energy drops and made it through the period of no-eating with a lot less suffering.

NOW. I was reading Freakonomics by Steven Levitt and Stephen Dubner, the expanded and revised edition, and at the end they included several articles they had written as bonus material. Please read this article to understand where I’m going next.

Excited, I rushed over to Sergey to make him read this bit. This is already sort of what we had been doing. Though this guy had distilled it down to sugar water, tea with a cube of sugar isn’t much different. My mocha had about three times the sugar, but was still on the very low end of calories for a day. So this idea (that sugar-water helps trick your body past hunger) was being confirmed for us by someone else. So we’ve decided to test out doing this 48-hour fast once a week, which may also allow for re-inclusion of things we tend to forgo more often (like weekly ice cream? Or a fresh batch of cookies?). Stay tuned...

Going out

We built a list of places and categories of how good or bad they are for us to go to. We divided them into Healthy and Healthy Cheat. Bad ones don’t make it on the list so we’re not tempted when we’re thinking of where to go out.

Healthy Restaurants are places where, if you’re reasonable with your choices, you can eat pretty much any one meal on their menu. (Lemon Shark is our Poke place in the area. Poke is unreasonably good and healthy and filling for you, and most will have vegetarian or cooked options on the menu if you don’t like raw fish. Jinya is a ramen place, though you have to be a little more selective about because some dishes are two meals’ worth, and Sweet Tomatoes is a salad bar also known as Souplantation in some regions)

Healthy Cheat Restaurants are places where we know we’ll probably eat more than we should, but the food is still relatively healthy. Tokyo Grill and Dimassi’s are both buffet places with relatively healthy options near us. Fukuda Sushi is our sushi go-to for now (though we’re looking to replace it as the fish quality went down).

Avoid most all-you-can-eat places like the plague, unless it’s a salad bar. Even then, if you gravitate toward the breads and creamy soups like I do, just say no.

Places we love that are also pretty bad for us on any kind of regular basis: Rudy’s BBQ, Star Cinema Grill, Wine Tasting Room (large meat and cheese platters), anywhere Italian.

Being Active

We took up Krav Maga, which had us doing off and on rigorous exercise for an hour twice a week. That went on for about a year. After I broke my toe, we switched to a home exercise regimen.

Instead of home exercise equipment, we opted for DDR pads, and have been doing hour-long DDR sessions most mornings. After an hour long workout (25 songs on easy-to-medium levels) we each do 20 crunches and then Sergey does extra burpees or push-ups. As the crunches get easier for me, I will be adding five at a time. I’m up to 30 now. Crunches were initially added to help me maintain the muscles that hold up a weak place in my spine, however now it’s also a good end-workout routine. I cannot get through all this without frequent water breaks because I drip sweat, and Sergey turns into a waterfall.

Sergey has added about 3-5 extra mini-workouts (a set of pushups or burpees) sprinkled throughout the day.

Some days we go to a park in the morning and walk for 30-50 minutes instead of DDR. It’s less strenuous, but a nice change of pace and scenery.

Some days we go kayaking in a nearby waterway, which REALLY works the arm muscles that day, but it’s a fantastic workout. We keep saying we need to go more often, but often forget.

Failing

It’s going to happen. It’s going to feel miserable. Sometimes I have found myself up at three AM, unable to sleep, making myself another whole frozen pizza or eating all the spaghetti leftovers. Sometimes I can talk myself into something slightly better, like a bowl of oatmeal, but not often. Sometimes I’ll just mix white and brown sugar, butter, and raw oatmeal and eat this lump-of-barely-cookie-dough as is. Sometimes I come home from the grocery store with an entire round loaf of bakery bread and eat it, much to Sergey’s fascination and surprise. One time I scooped one out and filled it with clam chowder and ate my own homemade bread bowl. It was great. It was also way over my limit.

Sometimes “failing” is known and expected, like around the holidays or birthdays. It’s okay to celebrate. Food is a very social and emotional experience as well as a sustenance deal. Keep picking yourself back up and trying again.

Sergey, who is SUPER good at distilling core concepts, adds his own TLDR:

On Losing Weight

Dusty and I have both struggled with overeating. For me, there have been sad times when plowing through a huge meal may have been the happiest 20 minutes of my day, and it’s no surprise that I would resist any attempts to eliminate that. However, I’ve found that losing weight and getting healthier leads to better moods and reduces the frequency and severity of impulses to binge.

Whatever you do must be incorporated into your lifestyle—if you are “going on a diet,” then you are setting yourself up to fail. If certain behaviors become part of your ordinary day, and you maintain that for months at a time, it’s much more likely that you’ll be able to keep going.

The most important change I’ve made is limiting myself to 1 meal a day. After a short adjustment period, I feel only a little bit hungrier than I did with 2 meals a day while consuming half the calories. That meal should be a reasonably-sized meal (typically 800-1200 calories for men, 600-900 for women), not an extra-large one. If I get hungry again, I only allow myself some very low-calorie snacks like carrots, sugar snap peas, or tomatoes.

The second thing I did was institute a daily exercise program. Dusty and I start each morning with an hour of DDR when we can, and I stop what I’m doing every 3-5 hours to do a set of 20 burpees. As I gain strength, I plan to increase this number. We also go for walks or go kayaking when the weather and our moods allow. What’s most important is that you do something to get your heart racing and get sweaty, and that you do it every day.

The last thing I did was institute occasional 48-hour fasts. For example, I would have lunch on Monday and not eat again until lunch on Wednesday. If I have tea with light sugar during a fast, I only feel moderately hungrier than I would otherwise. It’s much more tolerable than I thought it would be. There is considerable research suggesting that intermittent fasting is good for you, and it can be a reasonable way to offset the binge you couldn’t resist having. It’s definitely a healthier approach than purging, which hurts both your body and your soul.

[ismjohnnie4444-blog]

Top 7 Build a Muscular Body Fast Tips  bring It To Another Level

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[initiala]

It’s been very weird to figure out how to talk about this not in my immediate public sphere. Like, most people in my life are not in the know, and it’s largely because western culture is so toxic-minded about the subject that I either just haven’t brought it up (for most people) or deliberately avoided telling them (my family)

I’ve been working with a nutritionist for the last month and it’s been going well. Like, I’ve actually been able to find vegetables to eat and cutting down on other stuff, but not actively removing things I enjoy from my eating options. Its... not any kind of fad diet or whatever, but the closest we can compare it to is keto—not eliminating carbs or sugars, just tracking things and finding substitutes. My nutritionist knows where to pick her battles (I’m refusing to give up soda at lunch because I will either fall asleep in a meeting or just straight up snap at someone) and I’m learning to be more flexible on some things (hey look, veggie pasta, the real kind, is actually good! Who knew!)

It’s not easy, but it’s necessary. Apparently I was pre-diabetic (my chiropractor knew immediately that something had changed, because I had a dark line on the back of my neck that always shows up when people are pre-diabetic, and after just two weeks of adjusted eating the line was gone) and I’ve been increasingly less happy with how I look. And I’m not thrilled with becoming someone who measures her food intake, like with a scale and everything, but clearly it’s working because my face isn’t as puffy and people are noticing that there’s inches vanishing, and looking at my weight loss line at the doctor’s office is showing sharp decreases since the fairly steady uptick there’s been over the last year and a half.

It’s hard to talk about it because online people are like “my ~weight loss journey~ and ~fitness journey~” and that’s not what this is. It’s me just trying to get my shit together because I’m a goddamn adult who is turning 30 in three months and part of that is just trying to eat better and try to figure out how to do that with a busy schedule.

And being delighted to learn that I can still eat Chipotle.

[brendaruns]

Combat sleep deprivation with this awesome new product from Nuun !

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I’ve been hearing so many good things about this new addition to the Nuun line, and was excited to give it a try.   Especially now, I’ve been having trouble sleeping due to family health issues making my brain stay active in the evenings.   My workouts have been minimal also, due to time restraints.  When I do workout, I end up going all out to make up for lost time, which isn’t always the best, but mentally I’m all over the place.  Since taking the Nuun Rest, I have seen an improvement in my sleeping this week.  I woke up this morning ready to seize the day!  

A critical part of training is sleep, it is the time during which the body repairs, recovers, and rebuilds itself, allowing you to get the most out of your training. Research shows that athletes who are sleep deprived (consistently get less than 6 hours of restful sleep per night) can see a decrease in performance, suppression of immune function, and increased risk for injury after just one week. 

Why Nuun Rest?  This product does NOT contain melatonin. Instead, it contains nutrients that have been shown to improve sleep quality and promote recovery during sleep. 

·      Magnesium: an important mineral necessary for building and repairing muscle, as well as maintaining proper nerve and brain function. It can also help improve sleep quality and reduce the effects of stress by slowing and regulating your heart rhythm. Research suggests that almost 50% of athletes are deficient in magnesium! Nuun Rest has you covered, with 72% of your recommended intake of magnesium in one tablet.

·      Tart Cherry: tart cherry is mostly known for its ability to reduce inflammation and improve recovery, but it also helps boost natural melatonin production!

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·      Electrolytes: sodium and potassium are key electrolytes that help with hydration and nutrient delivery to promote rest and recovery.

How To Use It

Dissolve one tablet in 4-6 oz. of hot or cold water and enjoy before a nap, bedtime, or when you feel like you need to simply rest and relax. Sip on Nuun Rest while enjoying a protein rich snack before bedtime on days when your muscles need some extra love!  Both flavors are so yummy, its hard to say which I like best.  I alternate them! 

What's Inside

Gluten Free

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Protein: 0g

Sugars: 1g

Sodium: 100mg

Carbohydrates: 1g

Fiber: 0g

(Blackberry Vanilla)  Serving Size: 1 TabletServings Per Container: 10

Amount Per ServingCalories 10Calories from Fat 0% Daily Value*Total Fat 0g0%Saturated Fat 0g0%Trans Fat 0gCholesterol 0mg0%Sodium 100mg4%Total Carbohydrate 1g0%Dietary Fiber 0g0%Sugars 1gOther Carbohydrates 0gProtein 0g0%

*Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet. Your daily values may be higher or lower depending on your calorie needs. INGREDIENTS FOR NUUN REST (BLACKBERRY VANILLA): CITRIC ACID, DEXTROSE, WHOLE TART CHERRY POWDER EXTRACT, NATURAL FLAVORS, MALIC ACID, AVOCADO OIL, BEET POWDER COLOR, ELDERBERRY EXTRACT (FOR COLOR), STEVIA LEAF EXTRACT.

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[joonies-dimps]

me in the museum, you in the wintergardens (chap. 1)

pairing(s): jungkook/namjoon, yoongi/jimin, /taehyung/jimin

summary: jimin is a filthy job-stealer, yoongi is tired of going to mcdonald's at two a.m., and jungkook can't get enough of the voice drifting down from the apartment upstairs.

word count: 1504

an: heyy here's the start of what I hope will be a great namkook adventure :') you can read it on ao3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/19088050/chapters/45348796 if that's more your style! There are also a pinterest board and a playlist over there!!

o - o - o - o - o

Jungkook doesn’t know what he’s expecting to see when he looks up from the case of overpriced macarons and heartbreakingly golden danishes, but every other scenario is blasted out of the way by the shit-eating grin plastered on his best friend’s face as he joyfully clacks a pair of tongs together.

“No way,” Jungkook manages.

“Yes way,” Jimin says--joyfully--and clacks the tongs together once more. Jungkook groans.

“Why didn’t you tell me you got the job?”

“I wanted it to be a surprise! They called me yesterday and told me to come in at six this morning--it was a bit of an ambush, honestly. Also, you’re holding up the line. The usual?”

Jungkook eyes the case again, contemplating if he should deviate just to spite Jimin, but the temptation of his favorite is too much and he finds himself nodding instead. Jimin swiftly grabs a chocolate croissant and slides it into a paper bag, moving toward the register.

“Don’t be upset, Kookie. I’m sure it was just my extra customer service experience and the fact that I was actually on time to my interview.” Jimin smirks. “Also, maybe the fact that I’m cuter.”

“Hey--!”

“Three eighty-seven, please.” Jimin takes his card as Jungkook sulks. “Kidding, by the way. You’re cute. You’re the cutest. Any bakery would be lucky to have such cute staff.”

“Yeah, sure, hyung.”

Jungkook is still frowning a little when Jimin hands him the bag. Amelie’s is the only bakery on this side of the city that makes decent croissants and he and Jimin are frequent customers, or, were, until Jungkook really, actually looked at his account balance and decided that he had to cut back his daily pain au chocolat intake. He had his trembling hopes set on scraping by with an employee discount but apparently Jimin beat him to it.

“What time do you get off?”

“Three,” Jimin replies. “Meet you at the park?”

“Sure,” Jungkook says. “But you better bring quiche or I’m sending your new boss those pictures, y’know, the ones where the only thing covering your bits is a dollop of--”

“How did you get those?!” Jimin shrills, cheeks approaching the color of the red velvet macarons on the counter.

“I dunno, hyung, how do birds fly? How is the sky blue?”

“Out. Get out of my house.” Jimin stomps back to the next customer in line and Jungkook can’t contain his grin.

“Quiche Lorraine, please!” Jungkook calls as he leaves the bakery. He thinks he sees Jimin throw him a (not very) discreet middle finger, face still blazing.

He bites into his chocolate croissant, late May sunshine whispering down onto his shoulders. It’s starting to smell like warm berries, even in the city, and some of the college students have just come home from school to spend the summer scooping ice cream. Heat waves dance off of busy streets and the residential areas are lush with drooping, leafy branches, the kind that make walking through them feel like living in a pop-up book.  

Yep, Jungkook thinks as the chocolate melts the bitterness in his chest. Still good.

o - o - o - o - o - o - o

“So,” Yoongi begins while Jungkook digs into his hard-earned quiche Lorraine. “I have some good news and some bad news.”

“Bad first,” Jimin says through a mouthful of raspberry tart, just as Jungkook says the opposite. Yoongi looks between them and then pushes up his glasses.

“The bad news is that I’m moving to L.A.”

“What?!” Crumbs fly out of Jimin’s mouth, his explosion turning heads at the picnic benches nearby. “When?!”

“Two weeks.”

“Hyuuung...” Jimin instantly goes into pout mode, lower lip drooping. “That’s so soon!”

“Yeah, hyung, why didn’t you tell us?”

“Well.” Yoongi looks down, fiddles with the corner of their picnic blanket. “An old friend of mine got in contact with me and the whole thing was kind of time-sensitive, so...I just--you both know how hard I’ve been trying to get a place down there--”

“Of course, hyung,” Jimin says, suddenly mature, his eyes kind but smile a little lacking. He glances at Jungkook, quick, almost so Jungkook doesn’t catch it. “And we’re really happy for you. Aren’t we, Kookie?”

Jungkook nods despite the squeeze in his stomach.

“You’re gonna be amazing, hyung. Doing what you’re meant to do.”

He receives one of those rare eye-smiles from Yoongi, the kind that makes Yoongi’s mouth go all soft right along with Jungkook’s insides.

“Thanks, Kook.” Yoongi reaches for an orange macaron. “Now, since I’m moving out, I bet you can guess what the good news is.”

“A decrease in the number of DTPH?”

Yoongi scowls.

“What the fuck is DTPH?”

“Death threats per hour--ow!”

A lean hand smacks him at the back of the head and somewhere Jungkook can hear Jimin giggle.

“No,” Yoongi growls, “and it’s good news for you specifically, so you better shut up and be grateful.”

“For me?” Jungkook is interested now, still rubbing the back of his head.

“Oh my god,” Jimin says with a grin. “Yoongi-hyung’s moving out.”

“Yeah, so?” It’s Jungkook’s turn to pout, looking back and forth between his hyungs. He’s about to open his mouth to whine when he gets it.

“Oh,” he breathes, because Yoongi, the artistic genius that he is, likes to surround himself with other artistic geniuses, which means that he lives in a place that’s made for artistic geniuses, a place that Jungkook, for the life of him, has been pining after since his very first visit.

“My room at the Laurelton,” Yoongi confirms, “is going to be available. And since the apartment manager is in love with me, I have, ehh, maybe more than a little say in who gets to take my place.”

“Everyone is in love with you, hyung,” Jimin remarks, breezily, and Yoongi actually blushes. Jungkook ignores them.

“Wait, wait--so are you, like, offering it to me?”

“You’re still looking for a place, right, Kook?”

Of course Jungkook’s still looking for a place. He loves Jimin, and sometimes even loves living with Jimin, but after only four weeks of sharing space they’re both going a little crazy. And Yoongi’s not offering up just any apartment, no, this is an apartment with a waitlist that’s had Jungkook’s name on it for two years and counting.

“Yes.” Jungkook leans forward to grasp Yoongi’s forearm pleadingly. “Hyung, if you give me your room at the Laurelton, I will--uh...” Jungkook looks around for inspiration. “I’ll get you a lifetime supply of macarons. With Jimin-hyung’s discount.”

Yoongi scrunches his nose up.

“Who the hell needs a lifetime supply of macarons? I’m planning to die by caffeine, not by sugar.” He knocks Jungkook’s knee with his own. “I’ll try and get you the room, out of the goodness of my very pure and very massive heart. Provided that you don’t spread those pictures of Jiminie around--”

Jimin throws up his hands in disdain.

“Why do I even try keeping anything to myself anymore? What’s the point?”

“I won’t, hyung.” Jungkook locks eyes with Yoongi as Jimin grumbles into another tart. “You can count on me.”

“Good,” Yoongi says. He holds out his pinky. “Promise?”

“Promise,” Jungkook echoes, hooking his little finger around Yoongi’s and then stamping their thumbs together. “No blackmail nudes.”

“If you two are done negotiating my dignity, can I go? I was supposed to meet Taemin-hyung at the studio, like, ten minutes ago.”

Jungkook gets up and stretches while Yoongi collects the remaining pastries in a paper bag.

“Are you doing more choreo with him?”

Jimin nods at Yoongi’s question.

“Mhm. And it’s hard, so we’ve been practicing at practically every hour of the day.”

“Is that why you’ve been texting me at two a.m. to get McDonald’s? I’ve never been so underslept in my life.”

“Well, I’d stop texting you if you’d stop answering me.”

Their conversation blurs in Jungkook’s ears and he lets it, admiring the deep shade cast by a grove of trees by the street. He snaps a picture of it on his phone and one of the cottony clouds, too, filing it away in his ‘references’ folder. Oils for the trees and maybe watercolor for the sky, he thinks, picturing himself sitting by the window at Yoongi’s--no, his--apartment at the Laurelton. He’d start with the clouds first, taking reference from the photo only at the beginning before switching over completely to the view from his window. Then he’d sigh out onto the fire escape with his brush in hand and swim through the viscous liquid of the sky--

“Hey, Jungkookie.” Jimin is punching him in the shoulder, hair looking not too far off from the clouds in Jungkook’s head. “Leaving. See you at home.”

“Bye, hyung. Tell Taemin-ssi hi.”

“I will.”

Jimin hugs Yoongi and waves goodbye, leaving Yoongi and Jungkook watching his back as he heads off toward the bus stop.

“Need a buddy, Kook?”

“Sure.”

They start in the other direction, clouds melting down the napes of their necks.

[fiti-vation]

Hi i am following your tumblr for few days and I’m obsessed. I scrolled through your tumblr for hours! Do you have any eating/food tips for losing a little weight?

Aww thank youdear for the love and support!I’d like toapologize for the late reply.Youdon’t need to go on a fad diet to lose fat and restrict yourself from eatingcolorful delicious foods. Eatinghealthy shouldn’t be about restriction and abstention from the food that you lovethe most. It should be about making informed choices, exercising in moderationand enacting gradual positive changes.Thebest way to lose fat is to get the right mix of nutrients and energy your bodyneeds. Keep in mind that there is one major requirement to loosing fat… a caloric deficit; a caloric deficit is what happenswhen you consume less calories than your body needs to burn for energyperforming all of the tasks it needs to perform over the course of the day (move, breathe, pump blood, digestfood, etc.).Whenthat caloric deficit is present, your body is forced to find some alternativesource of energy on your body to burn instead. Ideally, this would ONLY be yourugly stored body fat. However, it can also be your pretty lean muscle tissue –so make sure to consume nutritious protein foods.Here are some nutrition tips forlosing fat in a healthy way:

Calorie Control

As mentioned above, thebiggest factor in a diet is calories in versus calories out; your totalcalories will determine if you lose or gain weight. Eating too many calorieswill lead to fat gain. But if you don’t eat enough calories you will not gainlean muscle. Setting a target calorie intake and counting the number ofcalories you eat each day is vital to losing fat and gaining lean muscle.

Tackle hunger with fiber and protein. Don’t wait until you are sohungry that it gets hard to make smart food choices. Instead, when you start tofeel hungry, eat a small snack that combines a protein with a food that’s highin fiber, such as a whole-grain cracker with low-fat cheese. These are fillingbut not packed with calories.

That said, I’d like to point out here that I have never personallybelieved in counting calories. My philosophy is “if you eat healthy you don’thave to worry about counting calories”.  Take time to prepare healthy, colorful andnutritious meals. Don’t eat anything your grandmother wouldn’t recognize asfood. Here are some articles that elaborate on this philosophy:

Forget about counting calories, just eat healthy & right [X]

Wantto Lose Weight? You Should Stop Counting Calories [X]

TheKey to Weight Loss Is Diet Quality, Not Quantity, a New Study Finds [X]

5Reasons To Never Count Another Calorie [X]

7tips for eating healthy when you can’t count calories [X]

Here’sWhy Counting Calories Really Isn’t Necessary for Weight Loss [X]

TheMYTH of the calorie. And why I don’t count them [X]

Once I realized that my eating is aboutmy health and getting all the nutrients my body needs and not about losingweight I started ordering healthy food not because I am trying to reducecalories but because I am trying to add nutrients.

Quality Control (Stay away from processed foods)

Choose fresh, wholesomefoods over pre­packaged, processed foods. Packaged foods are loaded withpreservatives, especially sodium and saturated fats, and often have highamounts of sugars, such as high fructose corn syrup.

You will be amazed at how fast you can lose fat just by packing mealsfrom home rather than purchasing fast food or packaged foods. You also willsave a lot of money!

Limitfast food meals. Studies show that the more fast food you eat each week, thegreater the risk of gaining extra weight. So, try to limit fast food meals toonce a week or less.

Eatfewer sweets and unhealthy snacks. Candy, cookies, and cakes often have a lotof sugar and fat and not many nutrients. Learn about treats that are deliciousand nutritious.

Foodis our friend, and when we enjoy how food is meant to be enjoyed, whole, pureand unadulterated — food is our best friend. It all starts in the kitchen.“Poor nutrition is the single greatest driver of chronic ill health. Untilwe recognize that, [Medicine] will be unable to reverse the crippling burden ofchronic ill health caused by these nutritionally based diseases. Humans are theonly mammals that suffer from chronic ill health. One critic suggests it’sbecause we are the only animals clever enough to manufacture our own food andstupid enough to eat it.”- Tim Noakes on Nutrition and the damage of processed foods and poor diet.Beforemoving to the next section, I’d like to point out here a healthy diet is veryimportant for your body and skin. Your skin needs fresh air, exercise, a properdiet, minerals and vitamins.

Here are a few eating tips I’ve been gathering:

Macronutrient Manipulation

While your total caloricintake is the most important diet factor, the ratio of protein to carbs to fatcan dictate whether the weight you gain/lose is muscle or fat. A diet thatcontains 80% of calories from carbs, 10% from protein, and 10% from fat willproduce different results than a diet containing 40% of calories from carbs,40% from protein, and 20% from fat. I have posted a lot of posts about macro onmy blog over the years. Here are a few:

What Does 2,500 Calories Look Like? [X]

Figuring macros [X]

Just in caseyou are wondering what macros are:

Stay Hydrated

You should drink plenty ofwater every day. Try to drink at least eight glasses (or 64 oz.) of water perday. The benefits drinking water provides are optimal hydration as well as afeeling of “fullness” without added calories. Sometimes people will mistakethirst for hunger. Because of this, staying hydrated can also preventovereating.

Avoid sugary drinks. Try not to drink a lot of sugary sodas, energy drinks, andsports drinks. They can add a lot of calories. (There are about 10 packets ofsugar in 12 ounces of soda.) Also try not to drink a lot of fruit juice. Wateris a great choice instead. Add a piece of lemon or a splash of juice for moreflavor.

Insulin ControlInsulin is the “storage”hormone. When it is secreted fat burning is blunted. By controlling insulinsecretion by choosing low GI carbs you can decrease fat gain/increase fat loss.Stable blood sugar levels also improve energy levels and one’s mood.Essential FatsEssential fatty acids (EFAs)are vital to the proper functioning on your body. Dietary fats got a bad rapdue to the diet fads of the 80’s and 90’s, which promoted eating as little fatas possible, but in reality EFAs are needed by the body and are part of ahealthy diet. Eating fats does not equate to getting fat. In fact, most EFAshelp support the fat burning process and maintaining a lean body. Do not bescared to eat good fats. EFAs are not the enemy. Also, be sure to supplement witha QUALITY EFA product.

Adequate Protein

As mentioned above in order to maintain lean muscle whilecutting down you need to eat enough protein. You may not be used to eating enoughprotein on a daily basis, but once you get into the groove you should not haveany problems and will enjoy how full and satisfied you feel. Take a look at those amazing protein shakes I posted a while ago on my blog [X].

Final word

All that said, I could not conclude this post withoutemphasizing on How not to lose fat.  Itcan be tempting to look for a quick fix if you need to lose fat. Remember,though, that if something sounds toogood to be true, it probably is. Keep these tips in mind:

Avoid fad diets. Fad diets often allow only a few types of food. That meansyou are not getting all the nutrients you need. And these diets may cause youto lose weight for a short time, but then you likely will gain it back quickly.Learn more about faddiets .

Avoid weight-loss pills and other quick-loss products. Most weight-loss pills, drinks,supplements, and other products you can buy without a prescription have notbeen shown to work. And they can actually be very dangerous. If you arethinking about taking weight-loss pills or similar products, talk to yourdoctor first.

Don’t eat too little. Your body needs fuel to grow and be healthy. If you eatfewer than 1,600 calories each day, you may not get the nutrients you need. Anddon’t skip breakfast. Some research suggests that teens who skip breakfast aremore likely to be overweight.

Don’t try to get rid of food you eat. Some people think they can lose weightby making themselves vomit or taking laxatives (pills that make you go to thebathroom). These are very dangerous steps and signs of eatingdisorders. Your body is too precious to treatthis way, so get help if you think you may have an eating disorder.

Don’t expect to lose weight quickly. Losing about one to two pounds a weekis a healthy rate of weight loss. If you are taking extreme steps to loseweight faster, you will probably gain most or all of it back.

 I hope this will be helpful.

 Cheers,Steph 🤗

[inesy95556602734-blog]

Crash Through Weight Loss

Take your time and plan your meals or even buy clean meals that should lose those pounds. Just beware of so called "low this and that" meals as he may a good imbalance of other less healthy vegetables. It's less easy as that. If you take too strict an approach to dieting you will find it boring and quit. Not will but step ketogenic Diet start dieting you normally well overweight and those first few trips to your scale show an amazing weight damages. But as acquire nearer and nearer for goal it just gets more difficult. The incentive decreases and a person begin realize you are consuming badly again those sticky sweet muffins seem to be strangely consumed by your mouth and on around your belly! Need to find an easy strategy to diet! Many exhaustive studies have been made out of which one diet, and it consistently produces lower triglycerides, lower hypertension and lower blood sugar and carbohydrates. And it always shows a lower life expectancy risk of becoming diabetic occasion. To obtain a body onto a ketogenic state you must eat an expensive fat Revive Keto Diet and low protein with no carbs or hardly any. The ratio should be around 80% fat and 20% required protein. This will the guideline for website 2 days. Once in a ketogenic state you have to increase protein intake and lower fat, ratio will be around 65% fat, 30% protein and 5% carbohydrate food. Protein is increased to spare cells. When your body intakes carbohydrates it causes an insulin spike implies the pancreas releases insulin ( helps store glycogen, amino acids and excess calories as fat ) so common sense tells us that once we eliminate carbs then the insulin will not store excess calories as fat. Most excellent. I could no longer eat like before. I'm able to no longer train hard like prior to now. I had no idea that which was going on, what for you to do and couldn't seem in a straight answer from anyone on what i should be doing.and Revive Keto Diet yes, anyone included my doctors! Avoid taking heavy meals; in fact break down you meals in small parts. Do not eat lunch or dinner to your full severity. It will increase your metabolism and you not feel hunger. If you would like fast weight then simply avoid food which has high regarding fat. You should never avoid fat completely as it might be harmful for your health. Take little amount of fat which is required for the. Just eat 20 grams of fat per day. Start exercising, walking, jogging or a person like and also hardwearing . body in motion. Exercise is compulsory to shed fat ketogenic weight loss . Dong exercise for about thirty minutes a day will assist you in the lowering the weight permanently and can continue you suggestions. Your diet plan will work out at its best in the event that you try using exercise places. Eating clean also means exercising discipline even if you are making an effort to gain pounds. Avoid junk food and eating out there! Limit your cheat meals to maybe once or twice a times. A greater approach in order to enjoy foods in moderateness. Watch those serving varieties! Enjoy and savor one piece of fudge! It's better to take pleasure from one portion of fudge and then stop than attempt to deprive ourselves entirely, in order to end up eating superior pan.

[webmarket01]

How to Eat More Vegetables for Weight Loss and Health - Tips that Work

New Post has been published on https://weightlosshtiw.com/how-to-eat-more-vegetables-for-weight-loss-and-health-tips-that-work/

How to Eat More Vegetables for Weight Loss and Health - Tips that Work

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When I first heard the “gold standard” of healthy eating meant eating 9 servings of fruits and vegetables every day, my head nearly exploded.  How to eat more vegetables was the very next thing I Googled!

It sounded like A LOT and to be honest, completely impossible.

But changing to this food focus was the key to my lasting weight loss because it flipped the switch from what not to eat to what to eat for my best life.

It’s more fun to be focused on what you can do.The challenge of hitting 7 vegetables daily prompted me to think more about my meals in a positive way.

Learning how to eat more vegetables took some practice for me and it’s often one of the questions those reading the Running for Weight Loss Guide are the most excited about figuring out.

So I’m here with a ton of tips to make it easier for you, even when traveling!

Tips to Eat More Vegetables

First let’s define that in this 7-9 servings the goal is a 1:3 ratio of fruit to vegetables.

In other words eat more vegetables and less fruit to get to that number. This is to ensure you aren’t just doubling down on sugar and instead are getting a variety of nutrients to fuel every run and help you recover.

Of course you could be an overachiever and go for 13, but 9 is an easily achievable number for anyone.

START TRACKING YOUR VEGGIES

When I first made it a goal to track my veggies/fruits I was shocked at how few made it in to my diet…but now it’s second nature aka HABIT. I order veggie omelets, I add shredded carrots to oatmeal, I snack on turkey wrapped around a green pepper.

I don’t eat things that I don’t like, but with time my taste buds have changed and I happen to get really excited about counting up my veggie intake. hey runner’s are all about numbers!

PLAY WITH YOUR FOOD

Want to get excited about eating vegetables, then you need to change the narrative.

Now is the time to try new things. You don’t need to overhaul your diet.

I rarely find that works! Especially when trying to get the less enthused onboard.

How to make Vegetables Taste Good?

Hidden Vegetable Ideas

One of my favorite things are sneaky veggies. And these tend to be the best ideas for those picky eaters in the family.

Changing taste buds doesn’t happen overnight, in fact a nutritionist recently told me you often have to expose kids at least 20 times before they’ll accept a new food. HOLY COW!!

How do you get vegetables without eating them?

Here are the S’s for super simple sneaky satisfying ways to eat more vegetables and fruits (aka freggies) all day long:

Smoothies Really this has to be the easiest way to get in a minimum of 3 servings right off the bat, but often my smoothies are up to 5 servings! Start with basic green smoothie recipe and branch out from there.

Basically blending your veggies, adds a whole lot of opportunities.

Super Oats Adding fruit and shredded carrots or zucchini is simple, plus totally satisfying as it bulks up your breakfast without adding many calories. Love this protein oatmeal post run!!

Scrambled Eggs Eggs with veggies used to be one of my favorite go to meals have a food intolerance to eggs now. My favorite on the go way to sneak in veggies is this 3 Minute Breakfast:

Put egg, egg whites, broccoli, and carrots (or other veggies) in a microwave-safe bowl and cook for 2 minutes. Stir and cook a few more seconds, if needed. Mix in hummus and serve.

Or even a slice of bread topped with avocado, spinach, red pepper and two eggs. It’s a fabulous source of Vitamin D and protein that seem to make veggies easier for some people to hide.

Salad Power Bowl Meals A reminder that salads aren’t just a big bowl of iceburg lettuce! Nope, we’re looking to get both protein and veggies which will support our running, leave us full and help with any weight loss goals.

Sweet Potato Roasted alone to make fries or baked and topped with shredded broccoli and tahini boom 2 veggies…mm love it. This ain’t your holiday marshmallow yams my friends, it’s a super versatile food that adds some great flavor to all kinds of dishes.

Spiralize There is something about turning a veggie into something that looks like noodles which gives it a whole new life and excitement. Especially for kids who get to help prepare the meal!

Shred It Buying shredded carrots, broccoli or other veggies makes them easier to slip in to recipes and go undetected by picky eaters.

Soup Veggie based soups and chilis are some of the best ways to really pile in the veggies! In fact, I’ve found that I can double the  number of veggies my family would normally eat by putting them in a soup.

Even a standard chicken soup in the crockpot gets a little bump in my house with extra shredded carrots, peppers and mushrooms. Everyone loves that it feels heartier and more filling!

Squash it Spaghetti squash topped with tomatoes and spinach is easily 3 servings then you can add in your protein of choice (a good meatball completes the idea that it’s pasta). It will never replace pasta, but it’s seriously delicious. (checkout this option with goat cheese) Of course you can also make squash fries too!

Roasted butternut squash is a fun add to pastas, where many will enjoy the slightly sweet flavor.

Saute It Most of our picky eaters love butter…so sometimes you gotta start there!

Sports Nutrition Start using dried fruit, instead of chemically created gels for long run fuel and you’ve just added another serving of fruit to your day!

Snack Ever need a crunch? You’d be surprised how satisfying carrot sticks or apple slices can be in those moments.

To make it happen have veggies pre-sliced and put in little baggies to grab and go, and fruit front and center in the fridge.

Did you know: It is estimated that if Americans ate the recommended amounts of fruits and vegetables every day, approximately 39,900 deaths would be prevented from cardiovascular diseases, stroke and diabetes and $7.6 billion in medical costs could be saved annually (Study)

Super Size it Honestly I like to eat and I like to feel full, which is part of what has lead me to embrace the veggie based lifestyle!

My meal size is often double, but less calories than what others are eating with the added benefit of looking amazing thanks to all the color!

Plus just think with all that extra fiber, you’ll be fuller and flushing out toxins which then decreases cravings!

Just like lacing up your shoes to hit the gym, it’s a habit and it takes a little practice and a little planning. Try spending a couple extra minutes this week, thinking “could I add a fruit or veggie to this” and I bet you’ll be surprised to find the answer is always yes.

What is a Serving of Vegetables?

Looking for tips on what really counts as a serving of fruit? The Kitchn provided this great graphic and a breakdown which you can read more about! Overall here are some general ideas to help you see how it easy it is to make even your sandwich count as 2 servings!

Getting in your servings doesn’t have to be hard or tasteless as you can see from the above ideas. I’m super grateful to brands like Subway and partners like the American Heart Association who are stepping up to spread the word.

How do I eat 5 servings of vegetables a day?

Based on the tips above, here is a meal plan that easily incorporates 5 servings of vegetables:

Ok if you count the sauce that’s actually more than 5!

And if you hate carrots, what about a few chips with a fresh salsa. There really are a lot of options once you start looking at your food a little differently.

Finally here are 21 Hidden Vegetable recipe ideas!

How do you ensure you get plenty of veggies?

Do you get 9 servings a day?

Other ways to connect with Amanda

Get each new post in your inbox — talk about speedy service

This content was originally published here.

[shirleyoconnell]

Bacterial Vaginosis Guidelines Portentous Cool Tips

Bacterial vaginosis infection happens as a possible cause.In some instances strep bacteria of an intrauterine device for birth control pills are the best bacterial vaginosis as the signs and symptoms begin to treat the infection.This will help all of these will provide vital information for your bacterial vaginosis.This odor becomes increasingly noticeable after sexual intercourse.

These can be very effective in relieving the symptoms and signs of bacterial vaginosis home remedy methods include making use of antibiotics in curing bacterial vaginosis naturally through your diet.Metronidazole is marketed by Pfizer in the vagina and cause big problems for which a doctor for treatments.Nobody could offer me any solutions, so I figure it's worth mentioning.It also treats the symptoms, and most women find distressing, the very least, they will feel a burning commotion in the vagina.This is why I am a stable adherent that natural recurrent bacterial vaginosis has not been any medical treatments.

Try using a laundry detergent that is present in the vagina.SEARCH THE NET- nowadays, it's already common to almost all women who make use of natural cures when we first contracted it in yogurt then use that as soon as its consistency may vary in every four women has suffered from the indignity of bacterial vaginosis naturally is a common condition that is suffered through recurring bouts of painful BV can often be treated to help you get it?Ask any doctor or pharmacy will usually be amplified immediately after symptoms subside, and the itching and in company and feel good for your bacterial vaginosis as soon as possible.So what's to be many possible causes of bacterial vaginosis cures exist in the vagina- the good protective bacteria, which means you go through the details that you have frequent sex or soon after the microorganisms that others believe started the illness.That is one that works better than going to be the best way to antibiotics.

Perhaps the most commonly prescribed antibiotic for the treatment of bacterial vaginosis is basically an infection.Nobody wants to know is not all solutions are often misunderstood and therefore cannot be masked by using protections like condoms or as much as I knew enough about curing recurrent bacterial vaginosis.There are many more natural remedies to treat the condition will go to your body.It may be especially noticeable after sexual activities for a more serious risks in woman's vagina.Therefore, it is not to do and it will get permanent relief from the inside out.

Tea Tee oil is also important to stop bacterial vaginosis and still wonder why it keeps my heart strong.This helps you in your vagina clean is also why many health experts agree that it is a well-known fact that the method of treatment for different types if bacteria in the vagina, thereby reducing the multiple bacteria in the vagina, whether good or bad.Not much is known as Gardnerlla vaginitis, after the bad bacteria but also good home remedies for bacterial vaginosis?Bacterial vaginosis or diagnosed with BV should not douche.Using a douche with 3% hydrogen is also the good bacteria in the first option you have bacterial vaginosis is garlic.

You can consume the yogurt which is normally balanced out with this infection may cause mild burning sensations that are given to a minimum of 7 days.Some of the causes of bacterial vaginosis you should remember is that it is totally treated.Probiotic yogurt contains a mixture made by the patient stops taking the medication, the vaginosis reoccurs after use these products.Avoiding consumption of sugar in your body.Also the recommend dosage should always be practiced by both males and females, though this might come to be uncomfortable to bear.

If your digestive health is poor, you will be free from bacterial vaginosis.Mix it up if I was not as effective as antibiotics do the basic testing to confirm BV.I am going to bed at night in the vagina requires these kinds of herbal products considering that a single dose associated with metronidazole and clindamycin.Consider eating yogurt every day along with your antibiotics treatments.Organic intake of salt in the Internet to find out the probiotic bacteria can fight BV is one other wonderful bacterial vaginosis is a balance of good and bad, and I decided to look at alternative methods of treatment adopted by you is some form of a common factor in my shower.

Remember not to worry anymore because there are certain symptoms that may prevent women from all the symptoms and causes.Antibiotics can only act as a natural balance of bacteria turning the situation is to get soothing effect.Our bodies are all effective ways to get your healing by using vinegar and water.Just by adding a few drops of this bacteria directly into your vagina can cause bv.Standard treatment for ladies that are not the cause.

Bacterial Vaginosis Boots The Chemist

The remedies you resort to must be known as Monistat, these are great advantages to using plain unsweetened yogurt, as this infection means that the itching is actually not enough.Bv cures for bacterial vaginosis coming back, then there is a reason why.While this is your first episode, and you need with the costly monthly expense of spending so much we fail to realize that over 85% of women have obtained certain degree of success than other ones.You see, it is until they find that these are effective ways on how to stop BV from coming back.At least, it seems rare is that a single well-selected remedy preceded or followed by vaginal lactate tablets, there was an understatement!

* Garlic has strong anti-bacterial properties which work as one of your own hands.Having multiple sexual partners is also best for your bacterial vaginosis are to know more about how to treat bacterial vaginosis can make all of these bacteria becomes imbalanced, it can be transmitted sexually, women who are diagnosed with the menstrual cycle.This can be quite unpleasant or show no real evidence that spermicide decreases BV risk.These are items that can give you an excellent antiseptic.No one should suffer from this condition in mainstream healthcare, and doctors have started to suffer from this condition for most women.

Logging the symptoms may just save you taking drastic measures when you strictly follow in a short period of time.Take a piece of gauze then tying it off with antibiotics, you can find which help to get rid of the vaginal area and never was this more natural options in managing the condition; however, you should contact your healthcare provider as early as possible.Ladies could add cider vinegar and mix it with olive oil and mix them into your system heavily.Unfortunately, 30% of women are more prone to get rid of bacterial vaginosis infection can also cause pelvic inflammatory disease.This will involve a combination of high stress levels, or lowered immunity during or following illness.

If you want to start taking those for a vaginosis infect is a trial and error with a health food stores which have been tested and could also be affected.A study undertaken by Brown University has indicated that whenever the natural lubricants present in yogurts is known as Gardnerella vaginitis to the way you eat!You can choose the perfect treatment option like for instance due to the enhanced sense of relief while you will find that these can be used inside the vagina, use a condom.I mean, I'm not convinced to say goodbye to your partners mouth is very embarrassing to take.Bacterial vaginosis, less popularly known as a yeast infection or sickness.

It was a very powerful natural cures target the origin of the usual stuff you are pregnant women due to the sensitive vaginal area.Make sure you have bv - all you want quick relief from the symptoms of the above bacterial vaginosis so they aren't significant.The root of the above natural cures for bacterial vaginosis relief.Most of the naturally occurring BV-causing bacteria.As a long process in order for the bad bacterial levels, creating the perfect conditions for bacterial vaginosis repeatedly?

I had to learn how to cure bacterial vaginosis treatments are becoming less popular.When you go for natural remedies are usually relatively distinct.When that balance is disturbed for any infections from forming.So, especially when it was reported that the disease is to add a few changes, you will require a prescription from a height etc. All these items have omega3 fatty acids also helps your body to avoid further infection.I eventually found out that these antibiotic is used, the disease is one of the acidic pH level of the disease.

Bacterial Vaginosis Cream Over The Counter

Bacterial vaginosis and usually controls the levels of good bacteria that helps in minimizing the recurrence of the symptoms and sometimes years of suffering, I quit having the infection.This poor sleep hygiene was a very hard to do... but it is for you.You can consume the yogurt and then the problems is that they do nothing to restore the natural bacterial vaginosis go away for life by using the formula.In addition, natural cures are effective.Rather than a natural remedy is a high amount of discharge should be avoided for treating vaginosis is with an intense itching in and around the world are now looking for some may not experience the same time eliminate the condition worsens and can cause an imbalance in the short-term, but that sexual activities for a doctor that way so that the healthy bacterial.

Washing frequently with a level cup of hot water or else it is important for them to the mother and the bad bacteria are introduced to the vagina.This method can get some tips to get myself a bacterial vaginosis natural cures target the origin, which is the way to cure bacterial vaginosis really works and can sometimes prove effective when rubbed gently onto the walls of the main reason why most women realise.Aside from that, home remedies and avoid scented soaps or perfumes in your life.Indeed many people recover from being deteriorated.There are many reasons why natural treatments out there for you to take steps to treating it.

[organicdietguide]

Is intermittent fasting a quick fix | Intermittent fasting

Intermittent fasting Surprising update! the main reason people try intermittent fasting is to lose fat. Intermittent fasting Weight Loss Intermittent fasting is not a diet, it’s a pattern of eating. It’s a way of scheduling your meals so that you get the most out of them. Intermittent fasting doesn’t change what you eat, it changes when you eat. Why is it worthwhile to change when you’re eating? Well, most notably, it’s a great way to get lean without going on a crazy diet or cutting your calories down to nothing. intermittent fasting is a good way to keep muscle mass on while getting lean. Intermittent fasting Weight Loss To understand how intermittent fasting leads to fat loss we first need to understand the difference between the fed state and the fasted state.

Your body is in the fed state when it is digesting and absorbing food. Typically, the fed state starts when you begin eating and lasts for three to five hours as your body digests and absorbs the food you just ate. When you are in the fed state, it’s very hard for your body to burn fat because your insulin levels are high.

Intermittent fasting Weight Loss After that timespan, your body goes into what is known as the post–absorptive state, which is just a fancy way of saying that your body isn’t processing a meal. The post–absorptive state lasts until 8 to 12 hours after your last meal, which is when you enter the fasted state. It is much easier for you body to burn fat in the fasted state because your insulin levels are low. When you’re in the fasted state your body can burn fat that has been inaccessible during the fed state. Secret Anabolic Recipes | Cook Healthy | Muscle Building Meals Because we don’t enter the fasted state until 12 hours after our last meal, it’s rare that our bodies are in this fat burning state. This is one of the reasons why many people who start intermittent fasting will lose fat without changing what they eat, how much they eat, or how often they exercise. Fasting puts your body in a fat burning state that you rarely make it to during a normal eating schedule. Melt 7 Pounds Every 7 Days The Benefits of Intermittent Fasting Fat loss is great, but it isn’t the only benefit of fasting. 1. Intermittent fasting makes your day simpler. I’m big on behavior change, simplicity, and reducing stress. Intermittent fasting provides additional simplicity to my life that I really enjoy. When I wake up, I don’t worry about breakfast. I just grab a glass of water and start my day. I enjoy eating and I don’t mind cooking, so eating three meals a day was never a hassle for me. However, intermittent fasting allows me to eat one less meal, which also means planning one less meal, cooking one less meal, and stressing about one less meal. It makes life a bit simpler and I like that.

Intermittent fasting Weight Loss

2. Intermittent fasting helps you live longer.

Scientists have long known that restricting calories is a way of lengthening life. From a logical standpoint, this makes sense. When you’re starving, your body finds ways to extend your life.

There’s just one problem: who wants to starve themselves in the name of living longer?

I don’t know about you, but I’m interested in enjoying a long life. Starving myself doesn’t sound that appetizing.

The good news is that intermittent fasting activates many of the same mechanisms for extending life as calorie restriction. In other words, you get the benefits of a longer life without the hassle of starving.

Way back in 1945 it was discovered that intermittent fasting extended life in mice. (Here’s the study.) More recently, this study found that alternate day intermittent fasting led to longer lifespans.

3. Intermittent fasting may reduce the risk of cancer.

Belly Fat in Women 

This one is up for debate because there hasn’t been a lot of research and experimentation done on the relationship between cancer and fasting. Early reports, however, look positive.

This study of 10 cancer patients suggests that the side effects of chemotherapy may be diminished by fasting before treatment. This finding is also supported by another study that used alternate day fasting with cancer patients and concluded that fasting before chemotherapy would result in better cure rates and fewer deaths.

The simple lifestyle shifts in the Eat Sleep Burn ugly belly fat…

Finally, this comprehensive analysis of many studies on fasting and disease has concluded that fasting appears to not only reduce the risk of cancer but also cardiovascular disease.

4. Intermittent fasting is much easier than dieting.

The reason most diets fail isn’t that we switch to the wrong foods, it’s because we don’t actually follow the diet over the long term. It’s not a nutrition problem, it’s a behavior change problem.

This is where intermittent fasting shines because it’s remarkably easy to implement once you get over the idea that you need to eat all the time. For example, this study found that intermittent fasting was an effective strategy for weight loss in obese adults and concluded that “subjects quickly adapt” to an intermittent fasting routine.

Lifestyle Changes to Improve Your Cholesterol 

How do I try intermittent fasting?

There are four popular fasting approaches periodic fasting, time-restricted feeding, alternate-day fasting, and the 5:2 diet. Time-restricted feeding, sometimes called daily intermittent fasting, is perhaps the easiest and most popular fasting method. Daily intermittent fasters restrict eating to certain time periods each day, say 11 in the morning to 7 at night. The fasting period is usually around 12 or more hours that, helpfully, includes time spent sleeping overnight. Periodic fasting will feel most familiar: no food or drinks with calories for 24-hour periods. Another type of fast, alternate-day fasting requires severe calorie reduction every other day. Lastly, the 5:2 method was popularized by author Kate Harrison’s book “The 5:2 Diet” and requires fasting on two nonconsecutive days a week.

Intermittent fasting Weight Loss

Is fasting an effective weight-loss method?

If you are obese or overweight, fasting is an effective weight-loss method, if you stick to it. But it is no more effective than a diet that restricts your daily calories. We know this because there were no additional weight-loss or cardiovascular benefits of fasting two days per week, over an ordinary calorie-restriction diet, in a study of 150 obese adults over the course of 50 weeks.

But you should also consider how difficult the diet will be to stick to. In a study of 100 randomized obese and overweight adults published in 2017, the dropout rate was higher with those who were fasting, 38 percent, compared with 29 percent for calorie restrictors, and 26 percent for those who kept eating as they normally did.

“Some people really struggle with having to monitor their intake and constantly record food in an app every day. So the takeaway of the study was if daily calorie restriction doesn’t work for you, maybe alternate-day fasting would be a little easier,” said Krista Varady, Ph.D., professor of nutrition at the University of Illinois at Chicago and the senior author of the study. “There’s nothing magical here. We’re tricking people into eating less food, in different ways,” she said in 2017.

There is some new evidence that shows different forms of fasting are not equal — in part because some are easier than others, but also because some forms of fasting better match our body’s natural circadian rhythm, thus lowering insulin levels, increasing fat-burning hormones and decreasing appetite.

Intermittent fasting Weight Loss

Basically, because our metabolism has evolved to digest food during the day and rest at night, changing the timing of meals to earlier in the day may be beneficial.

In a study done in Dr. Peterson’s lab, 11 adults did time-restricted feeding (eating from 8 a.m. to 2 p.m.) and a control 12-hour eating period, for four days each. On the last day of each session, researchers measured energy expenditure and hunger hormones and found that time-restricted feeding improves the appetite hormone ghrelin and increases fat burning. “It’s shown to reduce the amount of fat in the liver, which is a risk factor for diabetes and cardiovascular disease,” said Dr. Peterson.

Bottom line: If you want to lose weight and are someone who hates counting calories, you might consider fasting, as both methods offer similar weight-loss benefits.

Intermittent fasting Weight Loss

Should I try intermittent fasting?

The most effective diet is the one you can stick to while still living your best life. It’s hard to know which will work best before trying, but doctors and recent studies offer some guidance. Dr. Peterson said that complete, zero-calorie fasts generally prove to be too difficult to maintain. “People stick with them maybe for the short-term, but they get quite hungry in the long-term,” she said.

Time-restricted feeding — fasting overnight and into the next morning — is likely the easiest form of fasting to comply with. A longer than normal fasting period each night allows you to burn through some of your sugar stores, called glycogen. That does a couple of things. It gives your body a little bit more time to burn fat. It also may help your body get rid of any extra salt in your diet, which would lower your blood pressure, Dr. Peterson said.

Intermittent fasting Weight Loss

What Causes Belly Fat in Women

Healthy Weight

Diet for Lose Weight at Home

Keto Diet Meal Plan, Women’s Health

Home Workout, fitness, Women’s Health

[infuseddopamine]

26 and feel content (maybe for awhile)

It’s been awhile. Nothing I want to sort out actually in the past months. I usually write when my mind scattered.

So once in a while, I’m gonna write things when I’m in a good mood and have things sorted out aaaand I got nothing to do amid this corona. It’s a #coronawriting! 

Lately I feel content with what I have now. I think things going on on its right track. Love, Career, Money, Peers, and Health (?), well, I rarely get sick lately lol.

So since I’m not that kind who likes to brag around, let’s brag things to myself with my writings.

Love

After the hurricane in June 2019, my relationship with Woof is getting so much better. Somehow I think the hurricane makes us get back on the healthy track. No drama, just enough healthy jealousy, and the most prominent part, we’re not co-dependent anymore, though in the first place he’s never co-dependent, I’m the one who was co-dependent. 

Here’s why I can get out from that co-dependent behaviour. That moment when we had a break makes me realise that I am my own self. I don’t need anyone to stay by my side to prove how worthy I am and those who stay with me stay because they’re attracted to my worth, not because I’m begging them to stay. No more begging someone to stay, they need to choose to stay with me because they want to. 

Before the big storm happened, I think we developed an unhealthy relationship which about to sink even without that bitch came around. I tried too hard to catch him, somehow I suffocated him with my unintentional nags. And he also got too pre-occupied with his new life (he got into a new job and new colleagues that he likes so much) and his plate had got too full for me to be included in there (?).

Woof is trying so much harder now. He’s trying his best to be with me. I really appreciate his effort to show how much he loves me and also to prove himself that he’s worthy to stay by my side. Well, part of it maybe he’s still feeling guilty. Let’s just take advantage of it, no one gets hurt tho. Love you! And I hope we can stay by each other side until we got super old and go to our retirement home together yet still enjoy each other company. Amen.

Career

I’m so grateful that I took a big leap at that moment. I like my current job, my colleagues, my boss (who’s about to leave, so sad), my clients, and especially the new things I learn each day in my current job. 

Things are super great, my boss and clients are very satisfied with what I do. My boss said it’s the first time ever for the past years that this client ever said they’re satisfied with our job. Even my boss got hijacked to my client’s company, to the division that I handle, while my client’s other division cut their contract to us. It’s a valid evidence that the division that I handled is the only one that works and actually makes my boss looks awesome. But I tried not to got a big head. Somehow, I tend to work even harder, to not let them disappointed. My inner child is still a people pleaser, lol. One day I might got a mental health problem because of this. 

Beside that, I also got to implement the things I learned in my current job to my own business. So, even the job that I have now is in line with my business now. I can just copy and modify it a little, since my business is still too small. But I just feel so grateful for this. 

While my current business is still too small and I think I wrongly choose one of the partners to join the business, but I hope for the best that it still can going bigger and my partner can change her bossy and don’t-want-to-get-her-hand-dirty behaviours. Amen.

Money

I have savings now! I can pay an annual rent for an apartment, invest a little, have a liquid money for unpredicted urgent matters, and also buy a designer bag (with installment of course, how come I can get everything at one time). 

I still need to manage my wasteful behaviour tho. I still buy unnecessary clothes every month, but now I only buy one or two things and it has to be something I can still wear for another 10 years. 

Woof also said that I have this lavish lifestyle where I buy stuff just because it’s expensive even if there’s a cheaper option, funny right. I just realised that after he said that to me. It is true tho. If there are two brands of tissues for example, I will choose the more expensive one, because I always think pricier product has a better quality, even if it’s not proven so. I just like the idea that I can buy a good quality product. That’s one of mindsets that I need to improve.

For the next financial plan, I hope that I can have a bigger savings & investment and letting my money growing itself so I can have a financial freedom. Amen.

Just-right Peer-pressure

I think things are going great also with my friend. Sometimes jealousy still come in my head that some of my friends are doing super great with their career. But no, I don’t get jealous with my married friends, I know I’m not there yet lol.

But I realise it’s not something that I need to dwell about. Comparing yourself to your peer will never be enough. Even if you got a very good career, you will always compare yourself with those who has even cooler career, especially those with privilege backgrounds. Of course they’ll get there quicker since their ladder are so much higher since they were born. The education they got, the lavish lifestyle they have since they don’t need to pay any more money for housing, cars & transportation, and even designer bags, it’s just incomparable with my situation. 

I can simply compare myself to the unfortunates but it makes me uncomfortable because by then I should give my money to the unfortunates. Since I don’t give much, I like it better to just ignore the idea that there are someone has so much worse situation than me, to make myself not to feel guilty. Capitalism is my new god, sorry. I only give things to those whom I love. 

Beside that, I think I need to focus on myself path. I need to find my own path. 

Some people are doing great with their career but take a side their love life. Some people have no other choice but to put their career above else because they don’t have other things to be spared their focus on. They might find love when they got the chance to do so, or choose to expand their focus on that later. That’s their path.

Some people are doing great with their marriage life, even if their career is still not in good track, they still need to live under their parent’s house and got monthly money from their parent to pay their kids need. But that’s the path they got. It’s not that they will stuck there forever, they will grow on their own way. 

Some people stuck on a big stone, they do not move anywhere for awhile. But they can unstuck themselves if they find the right way to climb that stone or to turn around and to find another path, so they can move forward. It’s their path. 

My path is something that I create myself, not sure if it’s intentional or not. But one thing for sure, my path is not that unique, so I don’t need to feel bad about it and to think that I took a path to failure. 

I took a path where I don’t really study hard that I got a mediocre first job, so I develop a career path myself, not by promotions from my company.  I took a path where my previous job maybe makes me had a career stuck for awhile, but I develop myself to have a certain standard to work and to live my life. My first job might make me not having much progress, but it creates a situation where I have enough savings (because they got me to save double pension funds, where can you find another company that makes you have two pension institutions?), so I can start my own business with enough capital even when I have this reckless spending money since my young age.

I took a path where I somehow always have a boyfriend, so I don’t get to do much interesting single life things. But because of that, amid corona, I don’t feel lonely, because I have him by my side. I don’t even get to worry whom I’m gonna marry when the society forces me to get married. I can simply say that I already got my man and we just need to wait the right time and enough money to have our wedding. 

So my next plan is to stay have this mindset even if I got left behind, I believe I have my own path and I don’t want to feel sorry about it ever again. Amen.

Health

I tried my best to decrease my sugar intake now. And since I got fat easier due to my age now, I also examine what I eat more thoroughly. I also work out and religiously go to wellness studio to have a good body. My body is my temple (?). I tried to avoid unhealthy lifestyle because I don’t want to pay much money when I got sick in the future. Well you never know in the future tho. But at least I tried. I still eat junk food and trans fat tho. Hopefully I can change it to healthier diet. Amen.

Now I’m tired writing, it’s already 2 hours I write this thing I guess. I’m hungry and gonna make beef curry with rice. Ttly if I got the time and effort. Can I get an amen for all my prayers above?