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[padfootastic]

I posted 884 times in 2022

That's 800 more posts than 2021!

433 posts created (49%)

451 posts reblogged (51%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@padfootastic

@impishtubist

@greyeyedmonster-18

@narcissa-black-supermacy

@that-halloween-gay

I tagged 789 of my posts in 2022

Only 11% of my posts had no tags

#sirius black - 299 posts

#pen’s asks - 296 posts

#james potter - 160 posts

#harry potter - 151 posts

#prongsfoot - 90 posts

#pen’s notes - 60 posts

#good godfather sirius black - 58 posts

#pen’s writing - 49 posts

#ask game - 46 posts

#ppb - 40 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#‘it was me’ ‘no pads i pulled u in’ ‘ur cowardly ass could never potter. i leaned in first’ ‘pls as if u you’d ever stop sighing to do that’

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

anyway.

harry having the giggliest, easy to trigger laugh but the one thing that consistently has him cracking up is his dad laughing. like it’s just a never ending loop, harry would be sitting there on james’ lap, hands on his face, grabbing his glasses, mashing his cheeks together, giggling his little head off—james starts laughing—sets harry off even louder and both of them are just getting progressively redder and gigglier and it’s a riot for no reason.

(lily’s snort-laugh has a similar, if subdued, effect)

(sirius’ very presence supersedes all humor bc the little dude has Very Important Things to talk to him about which means being carried around everywhere, nonstop babbling, and all his attention directed towards one harry j potter. if sirius looks away for one second, harry will find grab his attention again bc he’s possessive like that. u can’t blame him, he only gets his godfather a few times a month ok?)

223 notes - Posted May 19, 2022

#4

okay remember harry’s dreams about a flying motorbike?

one of my dearest hcs is that sirius used to take toddler harry out on his flying bike, particularly when he was being fussy or refusing to sleep.

(a frantic james would mirror call him, begging for help because no one except sirius can calm harry down when he’s in strops like this)

he’d wrap him in a baby sling across his chest, take him high above the clouds, and point out the different stars & constellations w associated myths.

harry would fall asleep in minutes.

in the middle of a war, it was the most peaceful sirius ever felt

(anyone who knew—and when harry finds out post-poa—the first question is always ‘how tf did ur parents allow that?’ but you need only look at the way sirius was around his godson for the answer. he was so painfully tender, so protective that james & lily knew there was no safer place for their kid to be)

237 notes - Posted April 7, 2022

#3

summary: sirius tells harry he’s proud of him and our boy’s brain just. stops functioning. doesn’t compute. (for this ask)

“I’m proud of you.”

Proud. Of you.

Proud.

The word kept echoing in his ears, like a church bell, or a gong, or a siren, or a—

Well. One gets the point.

What one doesn’t get, however, is how to react to that.

Someone—an adult—was proud of him. For the first time, in his entire life.

And Harry didn’t know what to do with that.

Perhaps that’s why he’d beat a hasty retreat to the loo, seeing the befuddled look on Sirius’ face but not being able to do anything about it. He had a freak out to get to.

It had just been an offhand comment, thrown out like it meant nothing, like it didn’t upend Harry’s entire existence on its head.

“What- what did you just say?” he’d stuttered, incredulously, definitely taking it more seriously than intended.

“Er- that I’m proud of you?” Sirius had repeated. Slower. Uncertain.

Harry didn’t reply to that—atleast, he thinks he didn’t. Just remembered the owlish blinking, letting the words sink in, wrap themselves around him like a warm hug that was slightly too tight. One you didn’t want to get out of, but had to, if you cared for your circulation.

And so here he was, still sitting on top of the toilet lid, head hanging between his knees, wishing fervently he had a paper bag to breath into. That- that was a thing that helped, right? He’d heard about it on the radio once.

It wasn’t even- they weren’t even talking about anything serious. Just his grades, for god’s sake. And it wasn’t like—he was Hermione or anything. He knew he didn’t do well, but he got by, and frankly, it had seemed good enough to him, what with the yearly, er, distractions that were thrown his way. He didn’t fail, but he also didn’t die. Win-win.

See the full post

330 notes - Posted March 23, 2022

#2

thinking of toddler harry who’s very, very attached to his godfather sirius (as he should be, really) and gets pissy whenever he goes for work. (yes, sirius is a 9-5er here. suspend all disbelief, folks)

so, to get a handle on the tantrums, sirius dresses harry in his own little formal clothes, robes and over cloak and silver clasp and fake wand holder and all.

‘look, siri, im just like you!’ harry says, every morning like clockwork. once they look absolutely alike, hair combed and tied neatly (little butterfly clips in sirius’ curls, ofc), they set off for the day. sirius conjures a little size-appropriate desk for him that he can sit at, gets him a briefcase and all. when u open it, it has all sorts of colouring materials, beads and strings and charms for DIY, and a little notepad with a pen for Serious Stuff.

throughout the day, sirius gets his work done while harry carefully does his own stuff. whenever he gets too fidgety, sirius sends him out on a ‘mission’—going out and evaluating how the rest of the employees are doing their work. harry, of course, takes his task super seriously and tries to emulate sirius’ Grown Up Face very diligently, walking with his hands behind his back and an adorable little frown on his face. of course, he’s so short he can’t actually see what anyone’s doing but everyone’s accommodating enough that he has enough information to relay it back to sirius in his office.

at the end of the day, both of them take their cloaks off the hanger, simultaneously sling it over their shoulders, and wave a goodbye to the remaining members in the office. when they get home, harry is still meticulously copying sirius’ actions so he neatly sets his shoes to the side, hangs his cloak on the rack, and falls face first into the sofa with an exhausted sigh of relief.

‘being a adult is hard, padfoot,’ is the last thing he says before drifting off to sleep.

392 notes - Posted August 31, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Do you ever think about the fact that Sirius and Remus were fully planning on murdering Pettigrew for betraying James and Lily? No reporting it to the Ministry and clearing Sirius’s name, just death. Sirius was already planning on killing Pettigrew for it, and once Remus learned about the Secret Keeper switch, he jumped on the “let’s kill Peter” train immediately, he didn’t even wait for the train to stop, he climbed on through a window.

i’m gonna be honest—the whole thing is just so hilarious to me 💀💀

i mean, i can still get where sirius is coming from ykno? the poor guy was in prison, had his mind basically turned into soup, and then vilified by everyone—no wonder he’s so fixated ykno?

but remus, my god. what a mad lad. i can honestly see where all the feral remus hcs come from bc the dude didn’t need two seconds before he hopped onto the homicide wagon. he was just so matter-of-fact about it too like, ‘oh well, guess there’s no other way than to literally murder the only piece of evidence they have to explain this convoluted mindfuck of a situation.

cares not one bit about the three kids who’ll probably be traumatised—therapy exists for a reason and kids r resilient dw—or how he’ll explain it to the authorities or why they’ll do with sirius after—stash him in the outhouse—like the man had absolutely no reason to be as murderous as he was 😭😭 he’d just found out the truth five seconds ago.

446 notes - Posted August 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[catastrophicmind]

Get to know me (take two)

I came across this little prompt and thought we could continue sharing about ourselves. Believe it or not, but I’m invested in y’all and would love to get to know everyone! 😁

Are you named after anyone?: No, but everyone assumes my parents are huge Allman Brother fans because my name is Melissa. When I asked my mom about it, she informed me that she, in fact, hates the Allman Brothers. She just thought the name was pretty.

When was the last time you cried?: Ooh, boy. About a month ago when I made amends to my mom for all the hell I put her through. We both cried like babies.

Do you have kids?: None currently. I’d actually prefer to be a dog mom. The thought of having mini versions of me roaming the Earth is quite terrifying.

Do you use sarcasm a lot?: It’s literally the only way I know how to communicate. I absolutely love sarcasm and dry humor.

What’s the first thing you notice about people?: Physically, I go for the eyes— they’re a window to the soul. I actually can read people very well. Someone’s eyes say a lot about who they are as an individual. I normally can accurately hone in on their intentions and emotions within the first five minutes of talking to them. I’m big on reading energy. Plus, I’m a sucker for pretty irises.

What’s your eye color?: Hazel to be vague. Normally they switch between green and gold depending on my mood. It’s actually pretty cool.

Scary movies or happy endings?: Scary movies hands down. Not a huge romance fan. I thoroughly enjoy reading fluffy fan fiction, but I’m not big on lovey-dovey movies. I need to be on the edge of my seat the entire time. I get bored watching people fall for each other over a two hour timeframe.

Any special talents?: Heh. I was in concert and marching band for eight years. I can play any type of symphonic instrument you put in front of me from a flute to a tuba. I specialize in reed instruments but that didn’t stop me from learning how to play them all. Also, I play by ear. You can play any song you wish and within thirty seconds, I can pick out the key and play it in its entirety without reading any sheet music. I actually wrote a lot of scores for the football game music.

Where were you born?: Good ‘ol Raleigh, North Carolina where I currently reside. I’ve lived up and down the East Coast, but always manage to make it back home. I don’t intend to leave this beautiful area any time soon.

What are your hobbies?: I’m actually pretty boring. I do a lot of writing and reading, I’m obsessed with music (you can almost always find me with my headphones in) and other lame adult things. I’m getting to an age where all I do is work and come home to relax. I try to keep a structured life. I’m horrendous to be around if I don’t plan my day out in advance.

Have any pets?: No, my lease won’t allow it. My mom still has our family Cockapoo, Cody, we brought home the summer of my Senior year. He may not live with me, but I love him immensely. He’s like the annoying little brother I never wanted and came to grow quite fond of.

What sports do you play/have played?: I was not a sporty gal. Did four years of marching band in high school. It was intense considering we were the top band in the state all four years. We’d travel to Grand Nationals every winter and place in the semi-finals for the country. I got to march on the Indianapolis Colts stadium— that was pretty fucking rad. Had me in phenomenal shape too. I used to be able to run a five-and-a-half-minute mile.

How tall are you?: I’m five-foot-seven-and-a-half. Sometimes I wish I could be petite like other girls, but it works in my favor when I want to reach something on the top shelf.

Favorite subject in school?: History and Psychology. I loved learning about anything to do with what happened in our country and the world long before we arrived. I also adore understanding the brain and why it functions the way it does.

Dream job?: Substance Abuse Counselor. I’d love to work in a treatment center to help individuals struggling with dual diagnosis. I have personally been fighting addiction since I was twenty. I’m coming up on a year of sobriety early March and my dream is to give back what was so selflessly given to to me in my time of need. I want to bring positive change to the world for addicts that believe there is no hope. It actually gives me butterflies thinking about it.

Tagging: @the-type-a @heysatanitsyourgirl @webui1tgwensface @sentimentalslut @plutosschild @honeynotgood @duncans-unibrow

[alexis-royce]

ALEXIS WHY

Actually it took much longer for him to reach this point than initially expected, I think everyone deserves a round of applause for keeping him in high spirits and his senses functioning correctly for so long. Humans generally aren’t capable of that.

I think he’s doing quite well, all things considered.

[honeyabyss]

Phone calls after Mc returned to the human realm

Lucifer:

this man is stubborn, calling you would be like admitting he's gone soft and his pride does not allow that!

so he refuses to call for the first few weeks, keeping himself busy with work of which he has enough anyway

due to all his student council work, a few other tasks of Diavolo and on top of that the usual shenanigans of his brothers, he quickly becomes very stressed

he's at his breaking point and needs someone to talk to so he can release some of his stress before he takes it out on someone else

so he goes to your old room and starts talking as soon as he enters it, only to stop confused when he doesn't see you in the room, remembering only now you left for the human realm

disappointed he sits down onto the bed and curls the blanket around himself

"Their scent is almost gone...Soon it'll be as if they were never here"

he closes his eyes, sighs softly and makes his decision

"Mc? I hope I didn't wake you. I simply thought a conversation would be nice, it's been a while..."

Lucifer's call is pretty casual, he talks about his day, work and his troublemaker brothers, it almost feels like any other day before just this time it is over phone

he does not want to admit he misses you, a) because he'd seem weak and b) he fears what admitting it will do to him, he might just miss you even more

BUT while saying goodbye he accidentally lets a "I miss you" slip, his breathing stops shortly realizing his mistake, he is about to apologize when you say it back

he smiles softly, genuinely relieved about your shared sentiment and whispers "I'll call you again soon then" before hanging up

from then on he calls you every evening and you better jump right away and pick up at the first ringing, because this man is lonely without you

Mammon:

"Congratulations! You're one of our lucky winners of our monthly Devil-Lottery. We'll have to confirm your bank account number with the one given to us when you agreed to participating in the lottery. Would you be so kind to slowly repeat the number-"

this greedy demon will quite literally try to scam you, only to absolutely panic when you hang up on him

he will instantly call you back, constantly adjusting his glasses, a nervous habit he acquired over the years

"H-hey...Mc...uhm, it's me your favourite demon!"

he is relieved you picked up, as it means you didn't block him right away, he stumbles over his words trying to find an excuse why he just tried to scam you

"Ah you know I only did that to test you, you've passed nobody scams my human! You're my amazing human after all! That's why I love you...u-uh I-i mean...nothing...that was a static you must have misheard..."

when you tell him you knew it was him as you recognized his voice, he'll be outraged, screaming into his D.D.D (and probably later getting punched by Lucifer for being so loud)

"What do you mean you already knew?! You dared to hang up on The Great Mammon?

He gets a bit sulky by your reaction, so how about playing into his obvious lie of testing you to make him feel better again

besides trying to scam you Mammon also called to (not so sneakily) check on your wellbeing

now that you're gone he constantly worries about you and he can't do much to help, but if you were actually in need of help due to whatever, trust me he'd fight Lucifer himself for permission to go to you

he'll call you as often as he can, sometimes with a few days of a break in between, asking you about your life and also letting you in on his upcoming money making schemes...please don't tell Lucifer about them

Mammon has learned his lesson though, he'll never try to scam you again, he couldn't bare it if you were to block or ignore his calls

Leviathan:

phone calls? Why? You two can just talk about the in-game talk function of this new online game you play, but no real world talk while playing that ruins the immersion!

Levi will rarely call you as he just doesn't feel comfortable enough to talk with you about normie stuff for too long

he normally just spam writes you, ding, ding, ding, one message after another coming in without you being able to respond quick enough

so if gets too much and you decide to just call him so you can have an actual chance of responding, Levi just panics and almost drops his D.D.D

"Mc? D-did you accidentally hit the c-call button? N-no? I-i see no I love you too!!....AAAAAAAh I-i meant I l-l-love t-talking to you too...hehehe w-why would a yucky o-otaku like me say something like that"

poor boy is so nervous he'll say something stupid and will stutter a lot the first few times you call him, he is just not used to talking on the phone

he will laugh nervously over everything and sometimes there'll be a phase of awkward silence, but please don't point it out, Levi is already stressed enough as it is

once he gets used to calls, he'll surprisingly suggests to have a phone call while both of you are watching the new episode of an anime, so he'll be able to talk to you as if you're right next to him, which works out mediocre at first, you have to tell him to be a bit quieter a few times but besides that it's quiet nice

"Ooooooowhooooooah!!! Did you see that? That was amazing, I wish I had these superpowers, I'd save you of every danger like a real hero! W-what do you mean I'm already your hero?"

Yes, you saw and heard it, and your neighbours probably heard Levi...

on the rare occasions Levi calls you he'll often asks you for favours like to buy him this exclusively in the human realm sold limited edition game, of course he isn't like his scummy brother Mammon who'll constantly asks for things and he'll also make it up by sending you stuff you can only get on Akuzon

so calls don't happen very often, but neither if you really mind, you'll still be in contact through messages and games

Satan:

Satan will be very proper about calling you, he'll check through messages if you're fine with him calling you, so he can be sure you have time and he doesn't bother you

Satan never jumps into a conversation right away (unless he is angry), he makes sure to show interest in you and hold a bit small talk, asking about your day, how you're doing and so on

you talk about many different things with him mostly about your shared interests, but Satan is willing to listen to you ramble about hobbies he doesn't have as well

one thing you two quickly come to do was have book club sessions over phone

"I wish you were still here Mc. I miss my book discussion partner, nobody here has as interesting opinions and views as you..."

back in Devildom you two would both read a book and afterwards discuss your thoughts, and you found a way too keep doing just that

you both write about books, decide on one to read for the week and would than have a phone call where you just talk for hours about the piece of literature you've read

now that you're back in the human realm, the book choices are even bigger as you can read human books as well, you just have to send a copy to Satan, sometimes Barbatos will be nice and pick a book up and deliver it to Satan, or to you if it's the other way around with a demon book

"Oh? No, you're right. I haven't thought about it like that yet...your thoughts are so fascinating!"

Satan will shower you in praise for every little detail that you noticed yet he missed. he genuinely enjoys your phone calls, and though he wouldn't admit it, sometimes he anticipates your call more than the actual book

even though there now is a bigger distance between you two he still feels as close to you as before, not much has changed for him and he knows he'll be able to see you again soon, he'll just have to be patient

"Next week, same time? I'm looking forward to talking to you again. Take care until then!"

Asmodeus:

"Oh my Lord! You won't believe what just happened!!!"

no greeting or alike, just straight into the discussion

whenever something gossip worthy happens, Asmo is already dialling your number to spill the tea and keep you updated on any Devildom related gossip, even if it won't help you much, it's a nice thought of him keep you in the loop

those are only the spontaneous call though, obviously you can't take these all the time...you still have a life of your own...

you two actually call each other every day at the same time, plus/minus a couple minutes, the water in the tub has to be filled first...yeah Asmo likes to talk you while he is taking his afternoon bath

"Hahh it's so relaxing, warm water caressing my beautiful skin, and the bath bomb today smells so good! I wish you could smell it, or even better I wish we could bathe together!"

*water sloshing noises intensified*

Asmo...no....yes...maybe...just stop, you'll fluster Mc!

"No really! I miss having you here, I'll pamper you all day the next time I'll get to see you. You must already be starved of my beauty, but don't worry my dear, I'm just as starved of seeing your lovely face!"

what to talk about while he is bathing? Anything really if it's about your day, any complains or whatever, just expect a few innuendos of him...that's nothing new though

seriously though Asmo is the guy to talk to about any of your problems, he will listen and try to come up with a solution for you, even if he seems a bit narcissistic sometimes he really cares about you, so use your phone calls as therapy from time to time

"Oh darling, don't worry it'll be okay! I'm here to help...now tell me every detail so I can come up with a plan! I'll always be there for you, no matter what!"

Beelzebub:

"*munch munch* This one is really good! Mc you should try some...oh"

now that you're back in the human realm, Beels snack times are very lonely, he has just gotten so used to your presence, even sharing his food is normal by now

and let's be honest Beels snack time is 24/7 so he misses you a lot

he feels the urge to call you every five minutes and sometimes even forgets to eat while phone is ringing and he is waiting for you to pick up

but you can't constantly talk with him over phone so the calls often end up on your voicemail where Beel tells you about all the different kind of foods he ate that day

when Belphie catches wind of his twin constantly pestering you, he hides Beels D.D.D so he can't call you all the time

when you're actually able to pick up on his call, Beel will be so happy you can quite literally hear his huge grin while he's excitedly talking about his current snack

"Have you ever tried spicy bat-wings? There opened a new restaurant in town and it's really good!! Next time you're here I'll invite you there. Oh but what if it closes before you're back...ah you'll just have to visit soon!"

though Beel is often disappointed when you don't pick up, he would never hold it against you, he knows he calls quite a lot, but he just misses you and tipping a message while he eats is harder than putting his D.D.D on speaker and talking to you

of course he doesn't only talk about food, he also tells you about how his brothers are doing and how his workout was, or what things he has planned to do at the weekend, all in all Beel is just super happy to share everything of his life with you

on rare occasions he'll call you and be untypically quiet, that happens when he had a fight with his twin, it's not often but sometimes it happens and his first instinct is to call you, because he feels like he can tell you everything so he is very comfortable and trusting with you

"I miss you a lot, you know...but I also know that you think about me daily, every time your stomach rumbles you'll be reminded of me and that makes me happy, I also think about you every time I'm hungry! Hm? But I'm always hungry? That's right! You're always on my mind!"

Belphegor:

Listen, his sleeping schedule is very tight, you can't just expect him to call you!

he will call you so rarely and if you call him it might just happen that he is sleeping and has phone on silent...or he's just to lazy to walk to his phone, or he is just not in the mood to talk... he takes any excuse to not be on the phone

Belphie does like talking to you, but he is not the greatest at long conversations so he like messages more

sometimes when he can't seem to fall asleep, he will be the one to call you...in the middle of the night...and you better pick up or he gets annoyed

"What took you so long? I thought you wanted to talk more often and then you leave me hanging for a whole minute? Doesn't matter I would have waited longer with you...."

he is mostly silent through a phone call, his main reason to call you is because he like to listen to you talk, it's calming to him and if he calmer then he might be able to fall asleep again

so don't expect an amazingly deep conversation...

"Mhmmm...hm? Yeah I'm still there. I'm listening keep talking, I love your voice..."

he'll bring up a topic from time to time so you have an inspiration about what to talk about, but most of the times he just lazily hum or making acknowledging noises so you know he is still listening

"Zzz..."

he will to 100% fall asleep while being on the phone with you, that doesn't mean you're boring, but that he trusts you so much that he is comfortable enough to let his guard down

Diavolo:

"Good afternoon! How was the week of my favourite human?...ah don't tell Solomon I said that hahaha"

as the future king of hell, he is a busy man, but he still manages to give you a call once a week, to the same time you two would have normally had your weekly afternoon tea meeting in the castle

with the exchange year over there is not much about your classes to talk about left, but Dia is just as excited about any other topic you decide to talk about, be it the most mundane thing he loves it!

"Oh so you went grocery shopping? That must be fun! Barbatos does it all the time, though I suppose you buy less things...I'd like to see a human market at some point, I wonder if they're very different from ours...oh but I wouldn't really able to tell I suppose, Barbatos and you would need to point out the differences!"

this man can talk without taking a break for hours...you think Asmo is bad? Prepare for Diavolo...

but seriously it never gets boring with him, because he somehow finds good and fun stuff in every activity, I swear give him a vacuum and watch him clean you're whole flat with the enthusiasm of a child getting presents on Christmas

the work of a future king consists of so much paperwork, Dia will have only few events of his week to tell you about, if there is something to talk about there is a high chance it has to do with the brothers

so he'd much rather just sip his tea and listen to you, he'll ask you loads of questions though about anything he doesn't know

sometimes you two forget the time and Barb sadly has to remind you to come to a stop for now

"Mc? Did I wake you? If so I'm terribly sorry...would you be up to talk for a little bit more? I'm not feeling too tired yet"

surprise night time calls from Dia where you'll have to speak silently or Barbatos might reprimand Diavolo for staying up all night and being tired the next day, Dia doesn't regret it ever though, he likes to talk you a lot!

Barbatos:

Barbatos is always busy and his schedule can often suddenly change with a new whim of his master, so he can't exactly have a scheduled call with you

so you might not get to hear of him very often

BUT he made it a habit to call you when he is on duty to do the dishes, the chore is somewhat boring to him with no one to distract him

so he calls you and if you pick up, he'll put you on speaker and talk to you about whatever comes to mind while his hands wash one after another of the expensive porcelain of the royal household

"I've bought this new tea which is said to be really nice, it can even be enjoyed cold apparently. It seems to have to just the right amount of sweetness to not get bitter when drank cold...you can still add sugar for extra sweetness, though I believe you're already sweet enough as it is"

no matter what you decide to talk about Barbatos always has at least some knowledge about it, so it's beneficial for both of you, he can tell you the things he knows and you tell him your stuff

"I hope I'm not bothering you too much? There is quite a lot to do today... so it might take some more time..."

you will never get to know that Barb has actually already finished the dished a few minutes ago, but just isn't ready to say goodbye yet

the rest of the employees will be able handle the castle for a bit longer without him, meanwhile he can take a well deserved tea break and listen to you

he very much enjoys the fact he found a way to have some time with you while theoretically having to be at work, as long as he is able to finish all the tasks of his daily schedule, he doesn't feel too bad about his not so legal break

"I fear I'll have to get back to work now, but I loved talking to you today! I hope you enjoyed it as well. I'll talk to you again soon!"

Solomon:

Though Solomon returned to the human realm with you, you haven't heard much of him, being a wise old man sorcerer must be very time consuming

so calls of Solomon might be rare but that doesn't mean you don't write messages every now and then, when he calls you though it's always about something interesting or important to share, he talks about those things rather verbally, the best option for him would be in person, but that doesn't always work so a phone call is the second best option

"My lovely apprentice, how is your studying going? I've found the tome we were talking about last time you were interested in...it took some research to find which sorcerer had it but I brought it back for you. How about I'll drop by you next week? I can help you with your studying then, the tome is written in an older version of the language it might be easier if we do it together!"

Solomon can simply not sit still, so while you're on the phone, he is always tinkering at something and the background noises are sometimes quite peculiar...

Was that a pig squeaking? Are you sure you should be brewing a potion while being on the phone? Isn't it distracting?

Oh Lord was that an explosion?!

"Hmm? Oh yeah...I`m cooking dinner right now! It was just a small explosion though, you know the ones that are regularly happen in the kitchen. Why? Was my cute student worried about me?~ heheh alright, alright, I'll stop teasing you...for now!"

no matter how chaotic, teasing or busy Solomon is though, if you call him and are in need of help, he'll drop everything and run to you

he knows how hard it can be when studying magic, not to mention that the studies are difficult, the constant hiding of any magic in front of other humans is also very nerve wrecking, sometimes you feel like giving up and going back to your normal life, back to your non-magical very human friends that are blissfully unaware of everything happening around them, but you know you could never forget and act as if nothing happened, you'd also miss your new not so normal friends, so when times get hard Solomon will rush to you and comfort you in person or at least calm you down on phone until he is able to go to you

if that happens he is more likely to call you every two to three days just to check in on you

"Hey how is my strong and beautiful fellow human doing? Feeling better yet? Need a shoulder to lean on? I'm at your flat in 10 minutes..."

Simeon:

Simeon is a daily caller as well, he's gotten so used to seeing you every day that he feels quite restless if he doesn't get to hear your voice at least once a day

he asked you to recommend at what time he should call, he doesn't want to restrict you in your daily life, so you both came to the conclusion after dinner would be perfect, as both of you are free for the rest of the day then

He will often write a bit on his TSL scripts, just some notes and inspirations he comes up while talking to you

"How was your day my little lamb? You haven't overworked yourself right? Tell me if you ever need help!"

though Simeon would definitely have things to complain about with how Michael is working him to the bone, he'd rather not worry you so instead he tells you about how Luke is doing and evasively answers you questions about himself

"Oh me? Ah yes, I'm doing fine, just doing the usual archangel stuff you know...Ah please do not worry Mc, my dear! Nothing dangerous!"

over the time his TSL notes turn into random scribbles, rhymes and poems and every now and then something that looks suspiciously like your name

Sometimes Luke crashes the call and wants to speak with you as well so Simeon tries to put the phone on speaker only to end up ending the call and Luke getting frustrated with Simeon and doing it himself

then again Simeon also just accidentally hangs up on you mid conversation, because his fingers hit the button without him noticing, he'll get so confused when you cut off in the middle of your sentence and thinks something has happened to you, only to be relieved when you call back a few seconds later

Simeon is very interested in your day and how you doing, asking you many questions and encouraging you to keep talking

"Oh no please keep talking! You're not overwhelming me at all, in fact I like listening to your voice, it puts even the most melodic voice of an angel into the shadows...hahaha did I make you embarrassed? I apologize, I didn't mean to, I was only telling you my honest opinion!"

Simeon is quite the flatterer, but he often does not notice it, he simply tries to be nice, so a call with him leaves you flustered and stuttering ever now and then, but he is just as quick to blush at a honest and heartfelt compliment

Luke:

Luke might be an angel, but he is still low ranking and therefore has less assignments, besides studying to become a great angel and doing some minor tasks for Michael, he is relatively free

he often spends his free time in the kitchen constantly trying to improve his baking, now after the exchange year not only to impress Michael and Simeon but also Barbatos, maybe a bit Beel and definitely you!

but as Simeon is still working at these times, he gets somewhat lonely so he'll try calling you to keep him some company

Luke has this habit of speaking the recipes out loud to remember the steps better and be able to able to make them from memory, he got that tip from Barbatos, but he still has his moments where he gets stuck and forgets what to do next, you can notice that when he gets silent and concentrates on trying to remember

"Ah right that was it! I almost forgot about the eggs! Good thing you were here...or well on the phone hehe! You always remember this stuff, you're so amazing!"

when you tell him you simply looked it up in the internet for him, he'll get a bit sulky that he now basically cheated, but with your reassurance that he is already great and can remember so many other steps, he is quickly back to his happy little angel self

"Michael let me help with his conference today I was assistant record keeper today, one day I'll be able to do it alone, bit they're talking so much and so fast...I think I still need a couple centuries until I'm fully ready, but I'm working on improving! You should also try to improve your skills daily! Even a small bit of practice is good! Though I think you're perfect already!"

Luke most definitely learned his flattering from Simeon... he talks about many different things on the phone but repeating topic is Michael...just talking to you makes his day and later he'll tell everything Simeon and he smiles so brightly while he reports to him, please keep talking to him a lot!

[misschifuyu]

Can I get boyfriend headcanons (with nsfw) of Sanzu and Kokonoi? Also, I wanted to say I’m loving your blog and your writing! Thank you!

- hi there babe !! tysm im so so glad to hear that you like my blog omg ;; here are the hcs you asked for of the best boys ♡ 

Sanzu and Koko boyfriend headcanons + n/sfw

characters: sanzu haruchiyo + kokonoi hajime

genre: fluff + n/sfw

warnings: explicit content, orgasm denial, oral (both)

Sanzu

so ive already done some relationship hcs for him, but there can never be too much sanzu content so we will continue from those already written

going on a date with sanzu won't be something particularly regular, however when circumstances come together to allow you to spend time with your boyfriend, he will definitely try and make up for the lack of outings

he's not someone who would enjoy a simple date in a café. sure, if you wanted to sit for a while in Starbucks, he will reluctantly tag along behind you

though he hasn't a clue what any of the ridiculous names on the menu mean

but you will find him growing bored quite quickly. so make sure to get him out of the coffee shop and find something else to do. shopping is a prime example, but other times sanzu likes to actually do something fun

that is, if you happen to pass by an arcade, prepare to be dragged into it

doesn't matter if you didn't have any change on you, this was a date after all, so sanzu will be more than happy to pay for the games

he's surprisingly - and, honestly, concerningly - good at those shooting games where you have a prop of a gun

you don't know where he got those skills from, but you figured it was probably best not to ask

he's shit at racing games though. he won't admit to a loss against you, ever

instead, it would always be because of a distraction or because the game itself was rigged

he can be quite the stubborn one at times

but if you took him out to get a snack, he'll completely forget about getting overlapped by you, several times, in the race.

he's got a sweet tooth, so anything of the sugary sort will bring his mood up

when you brought him a bundle of sweets for his birthday he practically proposed to you on the spot he was so happy

and he pays extra attention to whatever you show a liking towards. he stores away these pieces of information and will make use of them in moments you would least expect it

now...onto the spicy content

okay so I don't see sanzu being vanilla

he probably isn't as freaky as some would presume, but he definitely isn't just going to make love to you and call it a day

the thing about him is that he's impatient

if you start to tease him, be it with subtle kisses on his neck or passing your hand over a certain spot of his trousers, he won't only get riled up in a matter of seconds

he'll also just straight up pounce on you or drag you off to somewhere a little more secluded if you were in public

it drives him absolutely crazy if you happen to have long nails and leave scratches on his back

it lets him know that he is, indeed, making you feel like a million dollars just by using his body

and it just...he loves it

foreplay will very rarely involved receiving oral on his behalf; he likes to leave that for later

when your hair is a mess and you've got a fucked-out expression before even going down on him

it would be like a half-time, though you didn't really get to rest much during said time

he won't hold back by that point, so you'd always have to stabilise yourself with your hands on his thighs unless you wanted to choke on him

he will, however, go down on you before getting into the main act, as he liked to call it. he'd always praise you on how good you taste

looking down to see his piercing eyes staring back up at you, the scars beside his mouth showing ever so slightly..

it was a sight you couldn't keep up for very long as your strength would falter at movements of his tongue

when it comes to positions, sanzu usually likes to be in one that will allow you to hang onto him for dear life as he pounds into you

he also loves taking you from behind, but only because it allows him to pull you back by your hair and whisper the filthiest words you have ever heard his mouth speak

"you like that? huh?...I figured as much from a slut such as yourself, now keep those noises coming before I make you scream even louder, babe"

bruises on your knees would always show up if he decided to keep you on all fours for the whole time

and he wouldn't always let you have the privilege of being on the softness of a bed

no, he'd do you anywhere

so be sure your wearing some easy fitting clothes

just so you don't have to struggle whilst putting them back on after making his car windows steam up in the middle of a parking lot

just before a meeting with bonten, no less

Koko

same as sanzu, ive written a few hcs for him too, but we shall do a few more bc koko supremacy

right so...hair

so we all know that koko styles his hair and it looks quite pleasing to the eye, what with the half of his hair flowing down at the side of his face

now, what you didn't know is that koko gets up pretty early to be able to sport this look for the whole day. we're not talking 8am, no. 5:30am, the reason completely unknown to even you, his partner

he would wake you up once, having slept over at his place, as much as he tried to slip his arm from under you as carefully as he could

wondering what on earth he was doing, you would get up at trace his footsteps to his bathroom, seeing him with a comb in his hand at an abnormally large pot of hair cream on the sink

he hadn't expected you to wake up, but he would quickly invite you to sit on the toilet seat upon hearing you ask what he was doing

from that moment on, you would always ask to try and style his hair whenever you stayed over, or even just play with it

admittedly, he loves the feeling of your fingers run through his hair as you'd try your best to make it look just as perfect as it always did

it would fail, the first few times, which would result in you just putting it up into a side ponytail cue jojo siwa reference

all in all, though, he quite enjoyed it whenever you'd play with his hair, so you were more than welcome to do so

as a result, he would ask about your hair routine or, if you didn't really have one, your skincare routine

he'd always be amazed at your smooth skin whenever he held your face to give you a kiss

so you'd best drop him the tips and tricks

some weekends, the two of you would do a sort of spa day, where you'd both shower - or bathe, depending on how motivated you felt - and run through haircare and skincare together

koko really liked the facemasks you'd bring over whenever you did this, especially when you would struggle to put in on your face because they could sometimes be a little tricky

think of it as a cute, couple's day off, which he would always look forward to at the end of the week

but he'd never admit this to anyone, not a chance

onto the n/sfw side of this man...

much like sanzu, he's not a vanilla person. but he does have his fair share of kinks

orgasm play is right at the top of said list. he absolutely loves to be fully in control, and watching you writhe around each time he'd bring you close to your high, he'd take his hand, or anything else, away from where you'd most need him

his stare would always turn slightly darker when he'd see you before him, at his mercy and covered in sweat, and he wished he could capture the moment forever

he's give you a good three to four failed orgasms until he would let up his teasing act, but not before he'd get you to beg for him

it would always send shivers down his spine when he'd watch your almost tear ridden eyes look up at him, pleading for him to just give in already

"I don't know...you just look so pathetic each time I do it, I almost want to just leave you here and let you get off by yourself"

his sly smile would always stick with you as he'd utter out any words to you, right before giving you one last swipe of his hand between your legs and bringing you towards him

as much as he would usually be the one in charge, loving how you'd feel around him and making the bed creak with every thrust, if you tried hard enough you could turn the tables

he'd be a bratty sub, mind you, but watching him come undone beneath you will be worth the struggling to actually get him in that position

whenever you'd ride him, his hands would always be roaming the curves of your body, trying to get ahold of as much of you as he could

it would be a way to try and get back into control, but as soon as you'd squeeze around him, he'd fall back into his almost helpless state

but, back to him being the one pounding into you, expect him to bring you as close to him as possible

one of his favourites is bringing you up from being on all fours up to his chest, watching you struggle as you try to stay upright as he'd suck the skin on the back of your neck

"so much for being in control, you pathetic whore"

you never got out of there with functioning legs, that much was true

[nejibaby]

Supposition

Pairing: Kozume Kenma x Reader

Description: Kuroo Tetsurou thinks you like Kozume Kenma, but you just aren’t sure if it’s true… yet.

Supposition - Part 1 | In The Silence - Part 2

Word Count: 1.6k

A/N: here it is, my first attempt at writing about hq. i’m not even gonna lie and say this is exactly what i had in mind because the truth is the scenes i planned on writing isn’t here, but i figured i’d just write it some other time since i didn’t want to post or write something too long 😅 anyway, this is me succumbing to the kenma brain rot 😌 please let me know your thoughts 🥺

There’s a short silence in the air when Kozume Kenma excuses himself from you and Kuroo Tetsurou. It’s almost like a pause in the world, or at least in your and Tetsurou’s atmosphere, when he leaves albeit temporarily.

It’s either that or the silence would feel a lot louder — a lot more known — in Kenma’s absence, even if he usually doesn’t participate in the conversation, opting to listen and/or play games instead.

But then Tetsurou breaks this pause, this silence, by saying, “I think you like him.”

He doesn’t elaborate further and you give him a questioning look, as you’re a little bit startled with his sudden statement, still in a daze from the pause.

“Who?” You ask.

“Kenma,” he says as he tilts his head towards the retreating figure of Kenma.

You take a quick glance at Kenma and say, “Yeah, sure.”

“That’s it? That’s all the reaction you’re going to give? No stuttering, fidgeting, or even looking away in embarrassment?”

Huh? “Why would I do that?”

Tetsurou’s facial expression turns blank. For a moment he just blinks at you. He scans your facial features and then he sighs, “You do know I’m talking about how you like Kenma romantically, right?”

Your eyes widen. “No! I d-don’t… It’s n-not what I… Uhm… That’s not what I was thinking. I thought you’re talking about how I… uh… like Kenma as a person.”

There it is, Tetsurou thought fondly, your stuttering.

He chuckles. “I should’ve known we weren’t on the same page from the way you nonchalantly responded.”

He ruffles your hair and you huff at his antics, trying to act annoyed despite the blood rushing to your face.

“I mean, you both always gravitate towards each other when you’re both at the same location. And you kind of have a different look in your eyes when you’re with him. Sometimes it’s a soft look, other times, it’s just purely excitement,” Tetsurou explains.

“So,” he leans forward and wiggles his brows, “do you? Do you like him in a romantic sense?”

You can practically feel your face heating up as Tetsurou smirks at you, awaiting your response. You open your mouth to respond but no words come out. Even your mind goes blank. Because quite frankly, you haven’t put too much thought on romantic feelings, especially not romantic feelings towards one of your best friends.

Before you could even relay that to Tetsurou, however, you both notice Kenma coming back. As usual, Kenma is on his phone, playing some game as he walks back to your group’s table. And while he’s distracted, you mouth, “Let’s talk about this another time” to Tetsurou while giving him the stink eye.

He doesn’t drop his smirk nor does he nod but you assume he understood what you just said. It is quite straightforward after all.

“What’s up with you two?” Kenma squints at you and Tetsurou. You internally curse at how awfully perceptive he is. “Did something happen while I was away?”

You void your face from any emotion despite Kenma looking away and directing his focus on his game once again. But just as you say “Nothing,” Tetsurou says “Yes.”

From the years and years of your friendship with these two males, you should have known Tetsurou was going to respond like that. When it comes to trivial matters like this, he has a habit of throwing you under the bus — only because the situations are just that, just trivial. Otherwise, he’s a great friend.

“You see, Kenma, our kitten here has a crush,” Tetsurou informs Kenma.

As the words slip out of Tetsurou’s mouth, Kenma instantly furrows his brows and his fingers stop moving — only for a moment though — his reaction was gone as soon as it came, although he does find himself unable to focus on his game anymore.

His reaction goes unnoticed by you as you throw a glare at your black haired friend, but it doesn’t escape Tetsurou’s eyes.

“First of all,” you start saying, “you said you think I like someone. It’s technically just your assumption. Secondly, I neither confirmed nor denied your statement, which leads to my last point, you can’t just go around proclaiming that as the truth.”

Tetsurou leans back and laughs at how defensive you’re being.

“Who is it?” Kenma asks, tilting his head in curiosity but without looking away from his phone.

You wag your finger at him, chastising him. “No, no, no, Kenma,” you playfully say, “Don’t listen to him. Don’t let his words get to you!”

Kenma rolls his eyes at you and then he surprises you and Tetsurou when he smiles at your antics.

You fight back the gasp that’s bubbling on your throat. While there’s no denying the fact that you’ve seen him smile before, it’s also no secret that he very rarely does it.

And seeing it appear because of you makes you swell with pride.

You’re unaware of the smile that crept into your face, as well as the knowing look that Tetsurou has as he watches the interaction between his two best friends.

“So there’s no one?” Kenma asks again.

There’s something in the tone that he used that tricks your mind into short circuiting. You’re quite taken aback by his… interest in your love affairs. And because of this, you feel something erupt inside of you, you just aren’t sure what it is. Regardless of whatever it is, it makes you feel warm all over.

Damn, feelings are complicated.

Wait… Feelings?

Was Tetsurou right in his assumption?

With one look at Tetsurou, who’s sporting an amused look on his face, your reverie breaks and this allows you to function normally once again.

“Do fictional characters count?” You ask cheekily, attempting to dodge the question.

Kenma sighs, and then the bell rings, signalling the end of lunch break, and by extension, your conversation as well.

The three of you stand up from your table.

“Are you coming to watch us play later?” Tetsurou asks you.

Kenma eyes you from his peripheral, quietly awaiting your answer. He finds you groaning and frowning.

“I wish! But I can’t. I have a lot of things to do tonight. I might even have to pull an all-nighter...” Ah, just the thought of it makes you tired already.

Tetsurou gives you a sympathetic look and pats your back. “Good luck! Come watch us some other time, yeah?”

You hum.

Just as you’re about to part ways with Tetsurou and Kenma, Tetsurou leans to you and whispers, “And for the record, I think he likes you too.”

Before you could even gather your wits to process what he just said, Tetsurou pulls Kenma and dashes away, not giving you the opportunity for a dispute.

His words ring inside your head repetitively all throughout the day. Even as you get home and bury yourself with your tasks, it somehow finds its way back to your thoughts.

“I think you like him.”

“And for the record, I think he likes you too.”

And because of these, a ton of questions flood your mind.

Do you really seek Kenma that often for Tetsurou to take notice? Do you really look at him in a different way than others? Does Kenma talk about you with Tetsurou? Does he go looking for you too? Does he act differently when it comes to you?

Trust Tetsurou to plant a seed in your mind, almost as if he’s expecting you to water it and let it blossom —which you really end up doing.

So here you are now, thinking that perhaps you do have a teeny tiny crush on Kenma. Because, yes, you like spending time with him more than any of your other friends. Yes, you stare at him a little bit too long sometimes because of his gorgeous facial features, especially his pretty golden eyes, complemented by his golden locks. And yes, you could admit that there were a couple of times that he made your heart skip a beat, although you’ve never really attributed it to attraction before.

But you still aren’t sure. And if there’s something that you absolutely dislike the most, it’s the uncertainty.

From the amount of thinking that you’re doing, you miss the message notification on your phone despite the silence. But then a knock on your door comes soon after, which effectively gets your attention.

You hastily make your way to open the door, not even having half the mind to ask who would come visit you in the dead of the night.

Once you open the door, a drink is shoved up to your face and you grab it hesitantly. You let out a gasp when you realize it’s the very man that’s been plaguing your mind who’s by the door. “Kenma? What are you doing here?” You look inside your flat to check the time. “It’s almost midnight!”

“Yeah, our game ran too late,” he mumbles. His gaze is on the floor, his back is slouched, and his lips are slightly downturned. It’s evident he’s tired. “Well, anyway, I recalled you saying that you’re pulling an all-nighter… so I thought you might need coffee and figured I’d drop it by before I go home.”

And there it is again, the warmth erupting inside you. “Thank you.”

Kenma gives you a curt nod and bids you goodbye, and just like that he’s gone.

You stand by the door until you can no longer see his figure. It almost feels like a dream, but the coffee that you hold in your right hand and the rapid beating of your heart that you’re feeling as you press your left palm to your chest is proof enough that what has transpired is indeed real.

You suppose Tetsurou’s right, you do like Kenma.

[cloveroctobers]

i was wondering if you could do an imagine where olivia is sexually assaulted and after her behaviour around the house drastically changes until she eventually tells jordan + her parents? i just wanted to see a protective, baker family imagine that focused on her :))

TW: mentions of s******* assault, trauma, bodily fluids, college parties, panic attacks, depression, etc…

A/N: took me a minute to decide if I wanted to write this piece since it’s slightly triggering for myself and can be to others. Not overly detailed ofc but I hope when I do fully get back into writing we’ll have some happy moments to come! Especially for my girl Liv.

SOMETHINGS WRONG — O. Baker

Olivia Baker felt like she could make a list of what she can now label herself as which held negative connotations:

The pill popper

The drunk

That mixed girl

The other twin

The girl with no solid friends

The boyfriend-stealer

The wannabe woke girl

And now the victim

She couldn’t get her mind to grasp that. That this happened to her, that she let this happen to her. If she was in her right mind she would realize that this isn’t something she could ever blame herself for but she knew others would, if she ever let them know. But she wouldn’t, she couldn’t.

What was supposed to be a fun weekend in Atlanta turned into a moment she wouldn’t forget. It was all fun and games, it actually felt like the one true moment in time where she felt free and happy. Surrounded by good people with good intentions, which only consisted of Spencer, Jordan, and Simone. These were her main people, her right hands, and her go-to but that seemed to fade the night her life drastically changed—yet again.

The events that occurred that night were burned into her mind in spurts. Olivia couldn’t piece them all together but she knew. She knew something was wrong with the way that she felt even though she was dressed as if nothing occurred. She knew the moment she pulled herself off the floor in her own drool to look at herself in the mirror that something was wrong. She knew it in her appearance and in the way that she felt. Her confirmations were proven correct when she decided to use the bathroom, what she felt, and what she saw.

She was gagging and struggling to breathe. Olivia Baker knew something happened to her when she realized she woke up alone on the cold bathroom floor. She was doing so well and thought she was stronger than this, how could this be added to the things of what happened to her or what she allowed to happen to her? Her mind was weak, somewhere in the night she let her guard down and now she was here. It all felt like her fault.

What will they say about her now?

Olivia’s experienced a handful of trauma in her teenage life before but THIS…this was something else. She felt like she was going to pass out again until she found the strength to let the anxiety take its course in subsiding. Pushing herself up with a huge whimper and wince, she began searching the bathroom for her phone as it was not on her body. She remembered the first thing she wanted to do was document this because as soon as she got back to Simone’s aunt’s house she was going to wash away the filth she felt.

Perhaps that was another mistake but she couldn’t erase what she felt beneath and on her skin. It felt like Olivia was moving in slow motion searching the fancy bathroom, stumbling and shoving items out of the way in search of her device. When she slipped on something in the bathroom, she failed to catch herself, her cheek colliding with the tile floor, she knew that would leave another bruise along with the rest on her body. Her eyes connected with the object which looked to be covered in what appeared to be blood.

With a shaky finger she reached out to it, and recoiled back as her finger became coated in the copper stench. That’s when the tears began to cloud her vision and she wanted to cover her cries but she felt frozen, like she did hours prior. So she cried until her body ached internally and furthermore externally, and with a shaky breath those came to a halt when she heard something rattling.

She moved painfully slow, ripping the shower curtain back to see her phone tossed in the stone shower face down. Swallowing, she picked the phone up to see that the now missed call was from Jordan. She had over thirty missed calls and fifteen text messages. Blinking Olivia unlocked her phone and opened up her camera and angled her phone before hearing multiple shutter speeds.

At least that part of her mind was still functioning. She thought to herself bitterly as she went over to the mirror once again, setting her phone down on the counter to call a Uber back to Simone’s aunt’s house.

This was just another scar in her story, she guessed. So she rinsed her face, and gave Simone a call first…feeling as if this was the best option out of the three…when all she really wanted to do was call her mom.

“Olivia!” Simone greeted, “Girl, where the hell are you? Last night was so crazy and Jordan was trying to stalk you but realized you turned off your location, which he said is something you’d never do but I figured since you went off with Othello and them you would be fine.”

It took a minute for Olivia to respond. Her vision still locked on her reflection as that name sent something through her. Making her eyes close shut as she heard the voice introduce itself with that name but she couldn’t connect the face to it. However it seemed like Simone was familiar with who Olivia disappeared off with.

“I’m in a Uber on my way back to your aunt’s house.” Olivia knew she sounded like herself to Simone but her face was stoney and she did not feel like herself…as to be expected.

Simone nodded, “okay…cool! I’m glad you got back to one of us because we were getting a little worried.”

“Worried I’d relapse?” Olivia stated but cleared her throat knowing Simone didn’t deserve the brunt of her trauma, “Please tell me Jordan didn’t call our parents.”

Simone chose to ignore that, wishing later that she didn’t—however her and Olivia were still trying to build their relationship as in-laws so they were still feeling out each other’s temperaments and personalities, “No. I persuaded him not to…although I know that would have changed if you didn’t show up at some part today and I don’t blame him. Him and Spencer are getting a little stir-crazy without you. So please bring your butt here so my aunt can take us to this flea market she keeps going on about.”

“Alright,” Olivia breathed out a laugh that felt humorless to her, “I should be there in ten according to the ride but we all know down here in the south it’s really thirty minutes.”

“Tell me about it! It’s always ‘oh, it’s right down the street!’ But why we still driving tho?!” Simone laughed, “see you soon. I’ll let the boys know you’re on your way.”

And with that they ended the call.

Olivia shoved the clothes she worn that night back underneath her bed, still unwashed and out of sight. She went searching under her bed after her black oil pastel pencil slid off her bed. It was always in the back of her mind that the clothes rotted underneath the place where she lay her head. Sleep no longer existed to her but it’s not like a good portion of concealer didn’t help hide her puffy bags.

Olivia was violated going on about three weeks now and she was expected to go on like everything was okay. That was the challenge. And it was exhausting and moments throughout her day felt like someone would hold onto her throat and squeeze for minutes at a time.

She kept up with her therapy so that nothing about her seemed suspicious. She had thoughts about her pills and the thoughts about sipping alcohol made her stomach turn—so perhaps that part was a good thing. Her dad moved back into the house so the family dynamic was shifting yet again, her mom made it her mission to not have any booze in the house and any over the counter medication that was addressed to any of them in the house would be under only her and Billy’s care.

Those wouldn’t be strong enough for Olivia anyways, and that thought alone made her laugh bitterly but she was glad someone was taking the initiative to her health. Liv was not to have any access to it. It might not have been said but Olivia Baker always paid attention to everything.

She was doing well at hiding, almost flawless in her mind; that something had changed her life for the worse. Whereas with her pill popping/partying had been out in the open and her drinking was slightly undercover, Olivia thought she was doing well acting like her assault didn’t take place—yet the signs were there however it was cautious on how to approach. She had been careless, leaving her phone unlocked when she went off to the bathroom and with iPhone’s broadcasting your memories with photo’s was what lit the flame.

Laura was sitting at the island previously with Olivia while the boys were seated on the couch watching some game. She was sipping her voss water when Olivia’s phone let out the alert, which was closer to Laura’s view. At first Laura thought they were nudes but when she picked the phone up to click on the photo’s, she felt her heart drop to her stomach. A gasp unknowingly left her lips, causing Billy to look over his shoulder at his on-again wife.

“Laura, baby? Are you alright?”

Before she could say anything else Olivia walked back into the room, rubbing the hand cream further into her hands as she made her way over to her mom. When Laura snapped her head up to stare at her daughter, Olivia immediately stopped in her tracks feeling her mother’s eyes almost stinging her skin.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Olivia tilted her head to the side, wondering why the blonde woman appeared distraught.

Laura wanted to hold the phone up but felt a protectiveness come over her not wanting to gain the attention of the two men in the house, even though Billy already had his body turned sideways at the exchange.

“Olivia, what is this?” Laura whispered, pointing at the phone.

It didn’t dawn on Olivia right away what her mother could be possibly be talking about, in a sense she tried to forget but when she looked back at her art pieces, once she completed them in her sketch book, she realized unconsciously it’s not something you can just forget.

Laura swiped against Olivia’s phone at each picture making Olivia sharply turn her head to the side and swallow the lump that formed in her throat.

“Who’s in these images, Olivia?!” Laura didn’t mean to raise her voice, but she wanted answers.

Now she gained the attention of Jordan who broke his eyes away from the commercial playing on the television.

Olivia chewed on her chapped lips not wanting to say anything. She didn’t want anyone else adding this to their list of things to worry about when it came to her. It was ironic really, Olivia Baker was always involving herself in everyone else’s issues but pushed her own pain to the side. She vowed with Spencer that they would start to only worry about themselves this senior year and yet Olivia seemed to not do that. In a sense…she going to therapy, she was picking back up her old hobby to ease her mind but the huge problem about this was she wasn’t talking about it. To anyone.

“Olivia—

Laura seemed to take a different approach, using what she learned in family therapy to level her tone and to not make her daughter feel cornered. However she was highly concerned and she wanted to hear what she already suspected from these pictures. She kept her eyes trained on Olivia who reached out to the island to balance herself, now feeling the room spin. Laura pushed the bar stool back and went to Olivia’s aid but she flinched, ripping her body away from her mother which made Laura let out a small sob.

“What’s going on?” Billy asked, now getting to his feet.

Laura didn’t want to show Billy the pictures but with the way she was clutching Olivia’s phone to her chest made the man snatch the phone from his wife’s grasp.

Billy on the other hand was furious. He rubbed at his face and Olivia didn’t want to see the expression on his face so she kept her back to the both of them now. It was when Jordan towered over Olivia, hoping that he could get an answer out of her opposed to what their parents were failing to do, he didn’t touch her but he paid close attention to the way she was acting right now and how his father was trying not to scream in the kitchen.

Something was wrong. Jordan could feel it more than sense it from what his parents were demonstrating, and yeah they were twins but they haven’t radiated the same energy off the other since they were kids. And who’s to know that might have just been in their heads like many people tried to argue but Jordan and Olivia were extremely close as kids, they shared a whole womb together so they had to share more connections outside in the world too? Their bond was much stronger as children but they were making their way back to each other as they got older. Yes they were their own people but it’s undeniable if they said energy was never a factor in their relationship as twins.

Jordan was calm as he peered down into Olivia’s for eyes, patient, waiting for her to say what she willing to say. Everything was silent to her ears, Olivia blocked out Billy wheezing out his frustrations as he crouched down in front of the island and Laura’s cries.

Olivia felt so small.

Jordan knew before Spencer said something that Olivia was acting a little off. He tried to be better as a brother in paying attention to her as she always did for him. He was worried when she disappeared off with some kid named after Shakespeare that Simone used to spend summer’s with as a kid. Sure Simone said he and his friends were good people but they were also a year or two older, settling into the toxic part of college life. He was the last one with Olivia after they watched some performances with Spencer and Simone already on the dance floor with other people.

“You let Liv go off with these people we don’t even know?” Jordan remembers Spencer saying to him after he got off the dance floor.

Jordan didn’t like how Spencer said this to him so he replied back with, “you were just on the dance floor with someone you don’t know. None of us control my sister, Spence. She’s allowed to hang out with whoever she wants. Plus Simone says Oscar is good people.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know that man,” Spencer tried to come correct, “Simone said she only spent summers with othello,” He informed Jordan of the guy’s actual name which Jordan sucked his teeth at, “so that doesn’t mean she really knows him all that well either.”

“Are you trying to question my girl, right now?” Jordan furrowed his brows, always looking for a fight due to his impulsiveness.

Spencer raised his brows, “I’m not questioning nothing. I’m just stating the obvious. We don’t know nobody out here, we not from here. We just have to be smarter is all I’m sayin’.”

Jordan didn’t like to be wrong but he felt like he wasn’t completely wrong? Sure his big brother instincts should have kicked in stronger but he was too focused on some corny dude pushing up on Simone. That was a little foul now that he thought back on it, Olivia should have been just as important—and she is. Which is why he wanted to do right in the present.

He noticed before Layla pointed out a couple of times that Olivia was bringing out the darker fashion choices and that it was nice to see sometimes, since she “did it so well.” He noticed before Simone told him to tell Olivia that she would be over to help her straighten the back of her hair out and he noticed that she was wearing eyeliner in her waterline again.

He noticed the long showers and staying outside in the rain, he noticed she’s been slacking on her podcast and scribbling in her old sketch book. He noticed her listening to nothing but Fiona Apple, Billie Holiday, old Alicia Keys songs, and Fefe Dobson instead of her usual song choices like: Aaliyah, Jorja Smith, Billie Eilish, H.E.R., Doja Cat, and Mereba. He even fought with himself at night standing outside her closed door to say something. He did remember asking her one night at dinner, which she barely ate, if she was okay and with a smile that didn’t reach her rimmed eyes…she said she was.

To Olivia it was silent as she admitted her truth about what happened to her in Atlanta, but to the rest of the Baker’s it was loud and clear. Over the course of three weeks, she gathered it all. The memories came back when they needed to and the fact that he reached out to her twice since she returned home was appalling. Olivia didn’t know if it was the guilt—that might have been a stretch…she didn’t know the piece of shit of a person at all, the audacity, or the curiosity on his part to see what she was going to do about this. If anything. She gave no information away in the DM’s, in fact she barely sent anything back.

There was no weight that lifted from her chest as she spoke her secret into the air, she still felt pain that she tried to numb down but it just felt like another burden she inflicted on her loved ones and she hated that idea. That she caused this. Most days she felt numb but she knew anger was brewing along the horizon.

Jordan went to Olivia who stepped back, which felt like Jordan just got punched in the gut. And he’s taken a lot of hits before in his eighteen years of life but this one might have been the worse blow he’s experienced. And that’s coming from a guy still healing from a concussion.

“Oh, god. I’m so sorry, Liv I—.” She heard Her twin say to her but it sounded like she was under water.

Life has been that way for awhile now, if you truly asked her.

‘I don’t want pitty.’ Her inner thoughts hissed. That was last thing she wanted. She was now coming to terms that she wanted this emptiness to vanish, if that was what this even was. She wanted to be back to where she was or at least as a kid where she didn’t have to worry about a damn thing. She didn’t want to endure what she’s been feeling since she entered her teenage years. Olivia Baker wanted so much more out of this life but lately it seems as if her purpose was to only be handed out shitty lessons instead.

What lesson was this? To showcase how the world can take away anything it wanted and leave you to deal or not deal with the aftermath afterwards?

The anger was indeed setting in.

Olivia didn’t realize that eventually Jordan put his arms around her and she gripped onto him for dare life. Her body didn’t shrink into itself like it commonly did weeks after what happened whenever someone touched her.

Her parents kept their distance picking up on the fact that she didn’t want to be touched but her other half held onto her and that seemed to be a step in the right direction for now. Instead Billy and Laura held onto each other too, their heads whirling around with how to further provide the best possible care for their daughter.

[brekkerism]

BASIC INSTINCT (Part 2- A Spencer Reid Series)

Part 1 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

A/n: this beautiful fic just won’t let me rest until I write it. It’s been hammering my brain all day so it could get written. So here it is. My beautiful, monstrous, funny looking BDSM baby. And of course, it would never be possible without my lovely @imagining-in-the-margins I swear she’s not only the best writer on this app, but also the best beta, and all around coolest human. So give all the love you can to her! And please enjoy and be ready for the next part soon <3

Couple: Spencer Reid/Reader

Word count: 4240 words

Rating: NC-17 or E for really fucking explicit

Content Warning: 12+ years age gap, intercourse, masturbation, dom/sub dynamics, brief not proper BDSM etiquette, cuckolding, cheating kink, a lot of swearing, and just all around dirtiness

******

I couldn’t look away.

There’s a scientific reason why we can’t look away during car crashes, or any other type of disaster. This was like that. Something about flight or fight, our basic instincts or something just as primal. I don’t know if I could explain it to you, but the man in front of me probably could.

Then again, he’s extremely busy fingering a girl right in front of me.

So what else could I do but stand there, paralyzed, my mouth hanging open, and my hands cupping myself, outside my panties?

He still hasn’t turned around. He still hasn’t turned to me. I could make a run for it and pray that he didn’t see me; pray that he kept to his everyday constant of pretending that I was invisible. I just had to open the door,it was right behind me. I was leaning on it. I could make it–-

But then, as if he knew, he turned, and for a moment, his eyes were only on me.

Fuck.

Fuck.

What the fuck am I supposed to do when I catch my coworker, who kinda hates me and who I-definitely-don’t-have-a-crush-on, in a bdsm dungeon, dominating a girl, while I almost masturbate to it?

The sensible, rational thing would be to get the fuck outta there and run away to a different country all together to avoid the embarrassment.

But then again,

I was never a very sensible and rational person. So, I looked back.

I looked directly at him, mustering all the bravado and defying I could.

And after months, after days and weeks and hours, he finally looked back – .

Not with disinterest, not with boredom, not with a blank, far away stare, no, he looked at me with such confidence, such playfulness in his eyes that, I seriously thought this was just a look alike.

This couldn’t be Spencer Reid. Because Dr. Spencer Reid doesn’t look at me. He doesn’t smile at me, and he doesn’t come into BDSM dungeons and tie people up and let audiences watch.

At this point there was nothing I could do; I couldn’t move my body even if I wanted to. All I could do was watch and listen and pray –

pray that God granted me mercy and made the earth swallow me after this was over.

“Get up.”

He finally took his eyes off of me, and it was like I could breathe. It was like I was drowning. It was like I was on fire. It was like going I was crazy.

Look at me again. Look at me again.

Don’t. Don’t.

I watched. I watched as he untied her hands from the head board, only to tie them behind her back, and the girl, his sub, got up on shaky legs and just stood in front of him. Waiting. Waiting for his every word, his every command.

Like he owned her.

“Get on your knees and turn your back to the audience.”

Fuck.

I wanted to get that smirk off his face. That didn’t belong there.

The sub did as he commanded, got on her knees in front of him, the only view we had was of the back of her head, and her tied hands. I could see how she bounced on her knees; how eager she was to please him, and how roughly he grabbed her hair. I could see it all.

I could almost feel it. I could almost taste it.

Then, Spencer Reid started to take his pants off, and I honestly thought my brain stopped fucking functioning.

It was like seeing something forbidden, something holy, something I was never, ever, supposed to see.

He slowly unzipped, and I realized that I knew this pair of pants. That was part of his suit. The suit he wore to work today.

The party with his friend. The fucking party. His girl friend. This was the fucking ‘party’ he was going to with his ‘friend,’ and he came dressed in one of his suits, like this was just normal. Like he just regularly used his suits not only for work, but for going to sex clubs.

Shit. I was never going to be able to see him wearing a suit ever again, was I?

Slowly, his pants came down, and he still took his hands off her hair to fold the piece of clothing neatly, like a perfect Boy Scout. Like the good and proper Spencer Reid would.

What he did next wasn’t proper, and I was starting to suspect, he was definitely not good.

In the blink of an eye, he not only discarded his boxers, but he grabbed her by the hair again, more roughly and urgent.

Fuck. Shit. Dammit all to fucking hell.

I could see his cock.

I could see his cock, how big it was, how hard it was. I could watch the precum making the pink head of his dick glisten.

How was I going to survive all of this? How was my heart supposed to keep beating on my chest? How was I supposed to breathe or live or exist now that I knew what Spencer Reid’s dick looks like?

“Now. Show me you can still be useful and let me use your mouth, hm?”

“Yes, Doctor.”

No. Motherfucking. Way.

She called him Doctor.

And there goes another thing I can never do again.

Before I could even really process the implications of that, he was fucking her mouth. He was holding her down, and making her choke on his cock, and not letting her up.

And he did it all while he looked at me.

And what could I do but look back? What could I do, but not take my hands from where I was groping my covered pussy, never really touching myself, but giving me enough pressure that I could feel the wetness soaking through fabric, to the point I could almost get my hands moist?

And he knew. He knew that’s what I was doing because he watched me just as much as I watched him.

Finally, he pulled the sub away, letting her breath and stopping the relentless pace.

“Are you loving this? Are you loving the pleasure I’m giving you?”

I knew those words were not for her.

He quickly untied her hands, but she remained so glassy eyed and compliant, I don’t think she even felt it.

“Get on all fours on the bed and face our audience. They’ll really want to see what comes next”

Her face was covered in spit and tears. It was red and almost swollen. But still, she smiled. She smiled and her eyes were glistened over with mischief and happiness and pure bliss.

It took me back. It made me crave. It made my knees buckle.

Because I knew what that felt like. And I wanted it again.

Spencer got behind her, turned towards the other voyeurs along the walls in the room straight on. Facing me straight on. I almost forgot about the other people in the room, touching themselves and watching with glee.

How were they not paralyzed with me? How was the world still spinning, how were they so unaware?

Spencer Reid was going to fuck a girl while he looked at me. How couldn’t anyone else see how absurd that was?

“I’m going to fuck you now. I’m going to make you feel me. But I need you to do something for me.”

A sense of dread filled me. Because deep down, I knew he wasn’t talking to her. I knew I was playing into some twisted game. I knew where this fucked up road would lead me.

“I need you to prove that you can be good girl, and touch yourself for me.”

It was too much.

“Make me proud.”

And what else could I do but obey?

He started fucking her while looking so deep into my eyes I thought I would combust right then and there.

I don’t even know how I got my hands inside my panties so fast. But I finally, finally touched my wet cunt, and it was so wet it was so easy to just put two fingers inside myself, I didn’t hesitate.

It was so good my legs almost gave out. I didn’t even know if it was just the relief of touching myself, or the pure ecstasy of hearing his voice, seeing his eyes looking at me with so much lust, obeying him. Finally getting a chance to prove to him how good I could be.

The only thing I could do to stop myself from moaning was biting my other hand.

The look he was giving me turned angry just as soon as I did. “Let me hear you or I’ll stop right now.” His voice came out low, but I was close enough to hear it, to hear the command in it.

Apparently, so did his sub, because she got a confused look on her face, even if it was just for a second.

She wasn’t holding back on her moans.

The order wasn’t for her.

This was so fucked up. This was wrong. This was filthy.

I stopped biting my hand. I kept looking at him, and I let him hear me.

God, I’m so fucked.

I was going to come. I was going to come, while looking at Spencer and letting him hear me moan. While he fucked another girl.

God definitely couldn’t save me now.

His pace started to get erratic and quicker, and there were words coming out of his mouth but I was so lost in the desire, the need. I knew I would have to look while he came inside her, but kept looking at me.

I slipped another finger and hopped he wished he could feel how wet I was. How close I was, how tight I was getting, how lost in the pleasure and how it was building, and building, and building. How I couldn’t even stop my fingers from slipping out from how wet I was, and how I wished they were longer and thicker, how I wished it was another hand entirely.

Fuck. Fuck. I had to come. I had to come.

Not until he lets you.

That voice. That tiny voice in my head. The one that was as natural as breathing once upon a time. The one I hadn’t heard in over a year. Shit.

And now I couldn’t. I couldn’t come until he told me I could. Not until he allowed me to make a mess of myself.

I looked into his eyes with all the pleading I could muster, silently asking him, and hoping that he would understand. Hoped he was merciful enough to let me.

And he did.

“Come for me. Let me watch you coming for me right now.”

I couldn’t hear anything else. I couldn’t even see if he came too. All I could do was be swallowed up by the white noise and the darkness behind my eyelids.

Bliss. Heaven. Nirvana.

I was made for this.

*********

I honestly don’t know if I passed out. I didn’t care if other people saw, I didn’t care what I must look like, slumped against the door with cum running down my thighs. All I could feel was the pounding in my head. When was even the last time I had an orgasm like this?

‘You know when the last time was.’

I did. But it was not time to hear annoying, imaginary voices in my head.

It was time to open my eyes, get up, and get out of here.

If I could only get my body to obey.

‘He got your body to obey just fine...’

No! No! I could do this. I could.

I could hear movement beside me so the scene was most likely over and people were going to want to leave, and I had to stop being stupid and get up and stop blocking the exit. I had to leave, before I have to look at him.

And so, I did the most pathetic thing possible.

I grabbed onto the doorknob for leverage, opened the door, and half crawled/half threw myself out of the room

Real subtle.

Thankfully, it was not that unusual to see people on their knees or doing weird ass shit. This wasn’t exactly the most conventional of places.

I got myself up, even if my legs were shaky and I was dirty and covered in my own cum. It was fine. I could walk and I could leave. I just had to get my things, and go, get to my apartment, and immediately buy plane tickets and flee the country. That’s what my trust fund and a limitless credit card were for right?

But I had to be reminded that fate didn’t like me. That my life wasn’t easy, and that nothing could go right for me.

Because as soon as I got myself walking away, a hand stopped me.

Please God, please let it not be him.

“Hey, where did you run off too? Is everything okay? Did you find a good scene?”

Amara’s sweet voice and face and beautiful Celeste beside her.

Thank you.

“Fuck, you guys scared me ‘mara! And I-“

And there he was, coming out of the room I was just in, just a few feet from me, with his perfect suit, like nothing had happened. The only thing separating us was my friends.

He looked both ways on the hallway, and finally spotted me.

And I did the only thing I could do.

I grabbed both of my friends hands, and practically ran to the opposite direction, to the main room, so that I could get lost in the crowd. So he couldn’t find me.

“(Y/N) what’s the rush? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Celeste was joking, but it’s kinda like I had. It’s kinda like being in the skin of a different girl. One I had put to sleep in a hidden corner of my mind.

“I kinda did.”

I looked deep into Amara’s eyes, the only other person that knew, and hoped she understood the look.

“(Y/N), it’s not him right? He’s on the other side of the country and he couldn’t get in here even if–-“

“No! God no. It’s just. Something happened. Look I need to get home, I’ll tell you everything later but I need to leave”

“Ok, but you drank and you look to shaken up to even be by yourself, let me at least call you a driver. I’ll get your keys from the front desk and I’ll drop your car off, ok?”

She tried to hug me, but I felt so tired and weird I just shrugged it off. I knew Amara understood me better than anyone and wouldn’t be mad. I prayed I could get out of there fast enough. I just needed to get my purse and coat and get out. I could do this.

The coat room, which was more for guarding clothes for people who didn’t exactly feel like leaving in a full latex body suit, was strangely empty. Not even an employee in there. I was too eager to wait or question it, so I just went in and hoped I could find it fast enough. thankfully it was easy enough to find and I could almost cry with relief.

Except...

The hairs in the back of my neck were raised.

Goosebumps.

What was that again about instincts and the human body being able to sense disasters...

I slowly turned, already know what I was going to see.

Spencer Reid was there, blocking my only exit.

Well, fuck.

This one isn’t gonna be easy to get out of.

********

“W-we have to talk.”

Stuttering?? He was STUTTERING??

How could he even switch from a dom who could make me ignore every rule and boundary I set for myself for the last year and a half and command me to cum while looking at him, to a nervous, fidgety and awkward mess, just like that?

“We don’t actually. You have to get out of my way and let me go home.”

I really tried to muster any semblance of authority, but I was still dirty, cum was drying down my shaky legs, I had make up all over my face and the sight of him still made my head spin.

“(Y/n) please. Please, talk to me.”

That made me freeze. In the little time that I have worked with this man, he has never, ever, called me by my first name. I didn’t even think he bothered to remember, and that says a lot for a man with a eidetic memory.

“Doctor, I am asking you to step aside.”

I knew that was a low blow after what I witnessed, but if he wanted to play with me, I would make sure I win.

“Don’t call me that in here.”

And there he was.

“What? Is your sub the only one allowed to say it? Where is she anyways? Did you remember to at least give her after care?”

I was just digging myself deeper and deeper into this hole.

“I did actually. Unlike you, I wasn’t worried about cleaning myself off my thighs and crawling away.”

Now that was a even lower blow.

“Yes. Running away. Now get off the door and let me do just that.”

Please don’t make me do this.

“We have to talk about this. We are coworkers, and we may not be friends, but we’re on the same team and I have a responsibility to resolve this. Because if you look at me like the way you’re doing right now in the office, they will know something is wrong.”

I took a deep breath and tried to ignore that he was right. It was the only thing we could do. For all of my talk of running away or quitting, I loved this job. I wanted this job. And I knew neither of us wanted to quit it.

“Fine. So talk.”

Let him be the one to come up with a solution. I was too angry and tired and confused to do so.

“We’re actually holding up the room, and the coat check worker will come back from his smoke break at some point, and I don’t think the music and sex are exactly the ideal background for this conversation.”

I could not go somewhere with him. I already did too many stupid things while we were in a room full of people, so what would I even do if we were in a proper room alone...Together.

“N-not a room here or anything. We can talk in my car and I’ll drop you off anywhere you want. I just want to talk about this calmly and as quick as possible. Weekends off are never guaranteed, and we could get a case tomorrow. The last thing I want is for anything that happened today to get in the way of our job. I cannot let that happen.”

I knew he was right, but it was still hard. I mean, how do I talk to a guy that went from not acknowledging my existence, to making me come in a bdsm BDSM club. It’s not exactly a smooth transition.

“Just lead the way already, Reid.”

He didn’t think twice, afraid I would back out, and finally opened the door. I quickly texted Amara to cancel the car, saying I called an Uber already. Here’s to hoping she bought that bullshit.

Breathing the outside air was kinda dizzying. After so long inside, and after all that happened, it was like coming out of a parallel universe. It was like coming though a portal to the real world.

It made the dread and fear set on my bones way quicker than usual.

Fuck. Fuck! How was I going to do this. I still had cum on my legs. My knees were dirty from the floor. I was a mess. What the hell was I thinking? Fuck, fuck, fuck.

We finally got to his tiny, old car. It was pretty, in a way vintage cars are pretty. It seemed so clean and pristine, and I just felt like I was going to ruin the seats.

Spencer got in first, unlocking the door from the inside for me.

I was really doing this. I was really going to sit in a parking lot, in Spencer Reid’s car, and talk about how he made me come, so that working with him wouldn’t now be the most awkward thing in the planet.

Like it would matter. Like it wouldn’t be awkward either way.

I got in, and he started the car, if only for the sake of turning the heater on.

And then there was silence.

Was he not going to start the conversation?? Did he expect me to start?

“I really–-“

“I didn’t–-“

Fuck. I should have just stayed quiet.

“Reid, I can’t. I need you to start first, and I need you to solve this. Just....”

“I-I... I didn’t know this was the place you came too. The chances of stumbling into anyone I know at this particular place are miniscule. The percentage is so low I never feared it. I truly did not know. I never intended for anyone to see this side of me. This is something extremely private, and that It’s part of the little personal life I have outside of the team. I don’t let it affect my work or who I am. I have been doing it too long to let it. I have not told anyone outside of my partners and the extremely few friends I have made in the scene. So when I say I need this to stay a secret, I mean it. This is the only thing I have for myself, and I intend to keep it that way.”

That was it? We weren’t going to talk about the actual thing that mattered?! He just wanted me to keep my mouth shut?

“Reid, believe me when I say this part of the conversation didn’t even need to be touched on. This is something that will never tell, to anyone, because I would never out you like that. How would I even explain how I saw you here in the first place? This is my personal life as well. Now, if you dragged me here just to tell me to keep my mouth shut, I’ll call an Uber and go.”

My hand reached for the door, but he touched my shoulder, keeping me gently in place.

How was this the same hand that was slapping and fingering subs? Hands that dominated?

We both looked at it and he quickly pulled his hand back.

“There’s a reason why I’ve ignored you from the moment you stepped in the BAU”

Now that got my attention. I could actually feel myself holding my breath. Was I finally gonna hear it? Was I finally gonna get a reason, so that I could stop laying awake at night, trying to figure out what I did wrong?

“I will not tell you why right now, as frustrating and unfair as that is. I still have to have something for my own and it’s not entirely relevant for what happened today.”

He had to be fucking kidding me. So I was supposed to what, just die of curiosity? That wasn’t even slightly fair.

“I don’t know what happened to me when you walked into that room. I’m not one for cuckolding or cheating kinks, so I don’t know why I would disrespect Madison like that. You don’t have to feel guilty or bad by the way. She’s into it, she’s just annoyed it wasn’t anything discussed or planned beforehand, and she’s right to be. But then again, I didn’t plan on any of that. I honestly thought I was going to stop the scene and ask you to leave or leave myself when I saw you.”

I still couldn’t get words out, or even reply to him.

“But I didn’t. You didn’t leave, and I didn’t ask you to. And I looked at you and knew we were going to do something extremely stupid. I don’t like feeling not in control in that space, so I just took it back. And that meant looking at you and making you touch yourself. That meant making you moan for me, making you come for me and making you want me. So yes, I’m not proud of what I did. It was unprofessional, fucked up and stupid.”

That was it huh? He did it just because, and it didn’t mean anything? He expected me to just go back to normal life after–-

“But I still can’t bring myself to regret it, or to stop wanting you as bad as I do. So I do not know where we go from here.”

Well, fuck me. Literally, fuck me. How was I ever going to leave here intact if he talked to me in that voice, saying stupid shit like he wanted me?

“Please, say something.”

I took a deep breathe, and I said what I wanted to say ever since the moment I stepped into that stupid room and saw him dominating a sub. Hell, maybe even from the moment I first stepped in the BAU.

“Just shut up and fuck me already, doctor.”

*********

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[fenristheorem]

How do you think Lance will react or behave when he realizes he’s falling in love with Gardienne?

Somehow, I feel this is a masterpiece of both fluff and angst... mostly angst, I guess, but with a bit of fluff.

Also, since the ask doesn’t specify, I wrote this assuming that they’re not in a relationship. It gives me more to write, however, I’ll be happy writing headcanons on Lance realizing he’s falling in love when he’s just casually dating Guardienne!

~Under the cut~

Lance realizing he's falling in love with Guardienne:

What is this feeling that he is feeling???

Is he dying? Having a heart attack? Has she poisoned him?

Lance is confused as all hell - why is his heart racing and his body tingling around her?

He knows why, and he wants to kill himself for it

He nearly destroyed the world, killed his brother and now he’s falling in love with the woman who should have killed him. Nice job. Well done.

Lance thinks he’s sick really. Maybe he’s actually ill or maybe he is twisted beyond redemption.

He decides not to tell her, she would probably kill him if she found out. Maybe he should tell her then???

It starts out slow. He begins to focus on her greatest qualities; the time she invests into the guard, her adamance on protecting the guard and Eldarya, her stubbornness on not taking shit from anyone - even her superiors. She doesn’t play games when it comes to safety and moral boundaries.

But she’s also soft, and kind. She’s not afraid to open her heart up willingly to others knowing how easy it would be for her to be hurt in the end. She lost many things, and yet she’s still willing to keep loving others knowing that they could be lost in time.

And as much as she used to hate him, and sometimes tries to hate him still, he knows that she’s getting used to having him around.

Lance tries to make this transition as easy as possible. He stays out of her way, does his best to provide help or protection without bothering her, remains friendly and cordial whenever he can. She has every right to be here, he doesn’t, and he’s not willing to step on boundaries.

However, he can’t ignore the warmth that begins to bloom in his chest when he observes her, and over time that warmth spreads from his chest, throughout his body, until it turns into an inferno that burns him from within. He begins to notice how beautiful she is, with vibrant eyes, sleek hair, and perfect skin, littered with small scars from their past battles.

And then she begins to grow comfortable with touching him. It doesn’t happen very often, but it drives him to the edge of sanity when it does.

It can be a small brush, or a gentle touch, but the absolute worst part of it is that he can’t actually feel it. He’s aware of the pressure and length of the touch, but the armor protecting his body doesn’t allow any actual physical touch to occur. It distress him to no end; he’s that close to actual physical contact - with the woman he’s in love with no less - but it can’t happen because of the armor.

He nearly stops wearing armor. But he’s also aware of the fact that he’s a warrior and needs to be well armed and protected at all times.

Besides, it would be very suspicious if he suddenly stopped wearing his armor. The last thing he wants is to scare her away.

However, the burning heat that spreads like liquid fire through his body is eventually replaced by cold anguish. The tingling he feels where her skin should have touched his turns to painful tensing as he steels himself to not reach out and initiate his own touch, knowing that it would likely upset her. His breathing, once completely aware of how steady and deep it is, turns to well-hidden constricted heaves as he breathes through a tight throat. And his eyes, once having glittered with interest and admiration, now glint with tragedy and turn away from her.

He can’t have her, he can never have her, he doesn’t deserve her.

This once beautiful feeling that embraced him kindly has now turned to a cold, painful sheet that lays over him every time he sees her.

Eventually he tries to avoid her for his sake. He finds it hard to think around her - she distracts him - and she doesn’t even know it. This tactic works for a while until he realizes that he just feels empty again not being near her and seeing her around. So he allows himself to go back to a bit of a normal routine, allowing himself to see her around occasionally. This just puts him in agony again, feeling how much he needs her but knowing she couldn’t ever possibly feel the same.

Lance begins to have dreams of her. He dreams that they’re together, alone, pressed so tightly against each other that he doesn’t know where one of them ends and the other begins. In these dreams, he savors the softness of her lips as he kisses her deeply, her enticing scent as she’s laid on his bed, the soft lull of her voice as she calls for him, and the way that she grasps onto his back and arms as she lets him have his way with her. And then he wakes up, cold and alone, and the rest of his night is rendered sleepless as the vividity of his dream quickly slips away to turn into an emptiness that makes him curl in on himself to try and ease the pain.

He turns this distress into physical labor; training harder and more often, spending more time at the forge, going on longer, harder missions in hopes of being away long enough to eventually forget about her. But nothing he does can truly distract him.

When he trains, he wonders if she’s perhaps watching him in interest and admiration from a corner he can’t see. When he works the forge, he can only imagine how she would react if he made a special reawakening gift dagger for her. When he’s away on missions, missing her so much that it hurts, he wonders if she’s missing him too.

Lance eventually gets used to this feeling - it’s just like his emotions on his brother’s death, or the terrible crimes he’s committed in his past. It’s an emotion that physically effects his whole body. And while it can be debilitating, sometimes, late into the night when he’s left alone to suffer to his own thoughts and opinions on himself, it’s nothing that he can’t live with.

He does his best to avoid and ignore her, but he can’t help but jump eagerly whenever she acknowledges his presence or extends a bit of warmth to him. He’s nearly completely sure that she doesn’t know about this, he hides it very well, but sometimes he wishes that she did. Who knows, maybe she does feel the same? He can’t know for sure until he asks, but he knows that if she doesn’t it’ll complicate things beyond any possible repair to the point where they won’t be able to function around each other. The cost of telling her and having her not feeling the same heavily outweighs the cost of not telling her and him suffering for who knows how long with an unexpressed love. He refuses to complicate things for the guard again, especially when it’s for something so personal and useless to the rest of the guard, so until she expresses any sort of interest that may possibly reflect his own emotions, he’ll bite his tongue and suffer it.

He’s suffered many things before, he can suffer the burden of hopeless love.

I hope this is alright! Again, I’m happy to write headcanons on Lance already being in a relationship with Guardienne and realizing he’s in love with her then, just submit a request if that’s something I should write. I might make that a scenario/short-story combined with his confession of the weight of his feelings if it’s asked for.

Have a request? Ask them here!

But first, please read the rules list for asks!

[beewolfwrites]

And When I am Formulated, Sprawling on a Pin - Chapter One: The Edge of a Diving Board

Hello everyone!

So I haven’t used my Tumblr account in years, but I recently binge watched Alice in Borderland not too long ago and like any sane person, I realised that it was pretty darn amazing.. and that Chishiya was hands-down one of the best characters in the show.

 So while I'm still riding the AIB wave, I decided to dig out my old Tumblr and write something! 

This is just the first chapter, and you can find it here on AO3 too. To be honest, it’s probably better on AO3 because the formatting is a little funny on here. 

I’ve written it in first person, but avoided giving the main character a name, so it can either read as a Chishiya x OC or as a reader-insert depending on how you prefer :) 

Please let me know what you think, and if you do read it, thank you!

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It was David Foster Wallace who put it best. The world was one big queue leading up to a diving board. You took your place in line, climbed the rankings, and once you got to the top? The end. Process over. Because that’s how life really is: breathe, work, jump off the edge. You fulfil a function and then you’re gone forever.

At least, that’s how I’d always seen it. But the Borderlands changed all of that. Suddenly I was being pushed towards the edge of the diving board when I had thought I was still in the queue.

It happened all at once. I had been in an apartment, laughing over drinks with my brother and his friends. It was our first time in Japan, and we were only visiting for a four-day summer trip. I had only been allowed to go on the premise that he was there. Looking back now, I wish we had chosen Brussels or Amsterdam.

The last time I saw my brother, he was laughing with his friends as I closed the bathroom door behind me. I had turned to the sink, taking a moment to splash cool water on my face.

And that was when the lights went out.

‘Power cut’, I muttered, fumbling around for the door handle and re-entering the living room.

The apartment was dark and cold. I was alone.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tokyo almost looked beautiful without electricity at night, like a ghost city paused in time.

‘Hey!‘ I yelled through the empty streets. ‘誰か’ Anyone?

My Japanese was limited at best, but I had to try. I had to find someone. There was no way this could’ve been a prank. A whole population doesn’t just vanish into thin air, it’s simply not possible.

‘Hey, Is anyone there?’ I tried again.

As if on cue, a light cut through the darkness. I couldn’t help but squint at the large white screen projected across a desolate building. I couldn’t read any of the kanji, but there was one word that stood out clear as day.

GAME

What is this? I asked myself.

Suddenly, the screen changed, this time sporting an arrow pointing to the right. I tried to read the hiragana, but it seemed there was no need. Another light appeared in the distance, glowing ominously over the tops of buildings.

I guess I have to go that way, I thought. Perhaps there’s some kind of big event on and everyone’s gone to watch.

I made my way to the source of the light, which turned out to be an old furniture store. In this sea of darkness, it was as if the electricity had pooled entirely into one two-storey building.

There can’t be an event in a place like this. Where is everyone?

On a wall was a smaller sign with an arrow pointing into the store.

GAME – こちらです

Hesitantly, I followed the arrow up the steps leading to the door. Inside, the hallway was fully lit. The walls were decorated with mirrors and printed canvases, their price tags and sale stickers still attached. Passing beneath an arch that led into a large room, I heard a tiny bleep. It was almost inaudible, but I knew I hadn’t imagined it.

As I peered around, looking for the source of the noise, a voice spoke.

‘I wouldn’t do that if I were you.’

I jumped, turning on my heels.

Leaning inconspicuously against a wall, a man was staring at me curiously. He was wearing a sleeveless grey top and looked to be in his thirties. He didn’t look like it, but perhaps he was the shop owner?

I stepped forward, intent on asking for help. However, I must’ve moved too quickly in my excitement, as my arm wavered, knocking a tiny vase with an artificial flower off a table.

It rolled across the ground, but before I could apologise and pick it up a neon red laser cut through the vase, leaving a singed hole in the plastic soil.

‘I told you not to do that,’ the man repeated, huffing.

I stared, wordless, at the destroyed flower. Lasers? What the hell kind of game was this?

‘Newbie, hm? This’ll be easy.’

It was a new voice this time. Another man, slightly younger, was reclining back in an armchair. I hadn’t noticed him until now as his green shirt blended into the furniture fabric.

‘A foreigner, too. How lucky,’ Green Shirt said.

My mind scrambled to piece together what Japanese it could.

‘すみません… 何がこれ？皆んながどこですか’ Excuse me, what is this? Where is everyone?

Green Shirt raised a brow, whereas the first man huffed once more.

‘It’s a game. You’ve just got to follow the rules.’ He gestured his thumb to a small side table where there were a several phones lined up. ‘You need to take one before registration closes.’

On second inspection, I noticed that they were both clasping phones tightly in their hands. Maybe this was part of the game? Approaching the table, I picked up a smart phone, finding that it sprung to life immediately with a face recognition screen.

‘FACE REGISTRATION IN PROCESS.

PLEASE WAIT FOR THE GAME TO COMMENCE’

A timer on the screen began to tick down from two minutes. Around me, I could feel the two men watching my every move. They seemed to be sussing me out, although I couldn’t figure out what for. Surely, since everyone in Tokyo disappeared, we should all band together and find others.

‘REGISTRATION CLOSED. THE GAME WILL NOW COMMENCE.’

This time, the voice came from everywhere and nowhere at once, as if through an invisible sound system. I looked around at the ceiling, trying to find the speakers, when I realised that at the back of the room all of the furniture had been moved aside to make way for a large circular table and four chairs. In the centre of the table was a stack of cards.

‘GAME – RUMMY

DIFFICULTY – FOUR OF DIAMONDS

TIME LIMIT – ONE HOUR’

Four of Diamonds?

I looked at the phone in my hand, where a picture of the aforementioned card flashed up. None of it made sense. And what did playing cards have to do with this?

The first man and Green Shirt both got up and made their way to the table at the back, leaving me no choice but to follow. They seemed to know what was going on better than I did. The three of us each took a seat, only I chose to a sit as far as possible from the other two. Judging from the deck in the middle of the table, we’d be playing a card game, and I didn’t want anybody close enough to see my hand.

The overhead voice continued.

‘RULES –

PLAYERS MUST COMPLETE A SINGLE GAME OF RUMMY.

THE OBJECTIVE IS TO CLEAR ALL CARDS FROM YOUR HAND. THE FIRST PLAYER TO CLEAR THEIR HAND IS THE WINNER.

THE DECK HAS ALREADY BEEN SHUFFLED.

PLAYERS MUST DESIGNATE ONE PERSON TO BE THE DEALER.

TURNS ARE TAKEN COUNTER-CLOCKWISE, FROM THE LEFT OF THE DEALER.

EACH PLAYER STARTS WITH SEVEN CARDS. AFTER THE CARDS HAVE BEEN DEALT, THE FIRST CARD IN THE DECK MUST BE TURNED OVER AND USED TO START A SEPARATE DISCARD PILE.

PLAYERS MUST ALWAYS DRAW ONE CARD FROM THE PILE, AND DISCARD ONE CARD PER TURN.

PLAYERS MAY PICK UP A CARD FROM THE DISCARD PILE, HOWEVER YOU CANNOT DISCARD THE SAME CARD IN THAT TURN.

PLAYERS MUST CREATE SEQUENCES OF THREE TO FOUR CARDS ARRANGED BY EITHER NUMBER OR SUITE. IF A SET OF THREE OR MORE CARDS IS CREATED, THE PLAYER MAY CHOOSE TO LAY IT DOWN IN FRONT OF THEM.

PLAYERS CAN ADD TO OTHERS’ SEQUENCES PROVIDED THEY HAVE BEEN LAID DOWN ON THE TABLE.

ACE MAY ONLY COUNT AS ONE.

JOKERS CAN BE USED IN PLACE OF ANY CARD.

CLEAR CONDITION – BE THE WINNER.’

Okay, I thought, mulling it over. Okay…

I hadn’t understood most of what the voice had said, but I could pick up enough that I figured it was just a game of standard Rummy. I had never played the game before, and I only knew of it through John Steinbeck’s characters. But I had played something similar, a card-melding game that my parents had taught me when I was a small child. I’d played it countless times, and I knew it like the back of my hand. Sure enough, these rules were slightly different, but it was still a card-melding game, all the same.

I looked up at the two men opposite me. They appeared confused, despite their attempts to hide it. Green Shirt gazed at me curiously, then smirked.

Oh…

‘A foreigner, too? How lucky.’

His previous words rang in my memory. Judging by the way the two men were looking at me, they were both counting on my inability to understand the rules. They were assuming I had no idea how to play, or even what rules were just read out. And yet, the brief glimpses of confusion in their expressions told me everything: they had never played a card-melding game before.

So they’ve already decided that they have the advantage?

I tried not to smile.

‘Do you know how to play?’ the first man asked me.

I paused, considering how I should answer. I didn’t know exactly what the stakes were, but judging by the laser I had just seen, losing the game couldn’t be good. In any case, I decided to keep my cards close to my chest.

‘このガームは知らない.’ I’ve never heard of this game before.

I was aware that my Japanese probably sounded like it came straight from a textbook, but in this situation, I couldn’t care less.

The first man nodded. He looked at Green Shirt, and said, ‘I’ll be the dealer then, if that’s okay?’

Green Shirt just shrugged and sat back in his chair, folding his arms across his chest. ‘Hurry up then. The clock’s ticking.’

Sure enough, my phone displayed a timer which read 57 minutes. I didn’t want to find out what happened if we didn’t have a clear winner by the time it hit zero.

The first man picked up the deck, dishing out seven cards each before returning the stack to the centre. He took the first card and turned it over on the table, beginning the discard pile. Picking up a card from the deck, the first man began his turn.

I didn’t pay attention to what he was doing, as I needed to focus on the cards currently in my hand.

King of Spades

Three of Hearts

King of Diamonds

Five of Clubs

Ace of Hearts

Nine of Diamonds

Eight of Clubs

It wasn’t bad. Or at least, it could’ve been a lot worse. The two kings stuck out immediately as a potential meld. I could certainly build around them. However, another thought came to mind. If Rummy was anything like the game I had learned as a child, it meant that players could add to each other’s melds once they were on the table. In that case, I would have to avoid creating sets of consecutive numbers within the same suite, as a three-card combination in this kind of meld would leave two openings for the others to get rid of their cards, rather than just the one.

Glancing up, I noticed it was Green Shirt’s turn, promptly ended as he threw an Ace of Spades into the discard pile.

That meant it was my turn next.

I eyed the Ace he just discarded and remembered hearing the overhead voice say something about Aces. But there was no time to think about it; the other two were watching me closely and waiting for me to pick up a card.

I reached out to the deck.

Seven of Diamonds.

Technically I could’ve used it in conjunction with my nine, but it was too risky. I didn’t have time to wait around in hopes of picking up an Eight of Diamonds. Plus, I’d already decided against consecutive sets.

I tossed it into the discard pile.

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The game continued for longer than I would’ve liked it to. The clock was ticking, ticking, ticking, and now read 17 minutes.

So far, my hand had started to come together.

King of Spades

King of Diamonds

King of Hearts

Nine of Diamonds

Nine of Spades

Five of Clubs

Ace of Hearts

I could’ve laid down my kings on the table. But there was only three cards in the meld, meaning one of the others could add the remaining king from their own hand. Across from me, neither of the other two had laid down any cards, and until they did, I couldn’t add anything to their melds either.

Green Shirt then took his turn and picked up a card. He glanced once at me, then threw a Nine of Diamonds onto the discard pile.

I must’ve regarded it a second too long because Green Shirt then spoke up.

‘You’re collecting Diamonds, aren’t you?’

I tried not to smile.

‘どうして知っているのですか’ I asked, playing along. How did you know that?

‘Because you always stare at the cards whenever I discard a Diamonds one.’

He must’ve gotten the wrong end of the stick, because whenever he discarded a Diamonds card, my heart sank. The last thing I needed was a Diamonds card.

‘I’ll try and keep a poker face from now on,’ I muttered.

Green Shirt frowned in response and checked the timer on his phone.

Nine minutes.

Nine minutes until game over.

That’s 540 seconds I had to land a good card.

Come on, I thought. Please be a nine. Please be a nine.

I picked up a card from the deck. It was a Two of Spades. I discarded it immediately.

In the back of my mind, I was starting to panic. Judging by this whole setup, we were playing for our lives. After all, what kind of game would have an invisible barrier that kills those who try to back out?

The first man threw away a Six of Clubs. Green Shirt stared at it and scowled. He must’ve been looking for extra cards to add to his meld on the table.  

By now, the two men were starting to become antsy. The first man kept scratching his eyebrow, whereas Green Shirt kept dragging his nails on the table in impatience.

He picked up a card from the deck, then grinned from ear to ear. He proudly lay down a consecutive suite consisting of the Seven and Six of Clubs and a Joker used to represent a five.  

Carelessly, he tossed down a Nine of Clubs.

My heart jumped, and adrenaline shot through me.

He still thinks I’m collecting Diamonds. That’s why he tossed it.

My hand shot out and snatched up the card from the pile before Green Shirt could figure out his mistake. And figure it out, he did, because his eyes widened slightly.

I looked at him squarely.

‘I have something to confess,’ I said in English. ‘I lied. I’m not collecting Diamonds.’

Green Shirt’s smile dropped. He didn’t understand, but he would soon enough. The thing about Jokers is that they’re always a double-edged sword.

Laying down my new trio of nines, I reached over to Green Shirt’s meld and inserted my Five of Clubs, swiping his Joker for myself.

He made a noise of protest, whereas the first man watched on with disbelief, as if hoping that his intuition was wrong.

I added the Joker to my two Kings, creating a new meld which I down on the table.

Their faces told all. They had no idea that Jokers could be swapped. Even though I hadn’t understood the rules outlined at the beginning, it was evident that this was a rule that hadn’t been mentioned.

Watching them shake their heads, wide eyed… it was like watching a penny drop.

‘ごめんなさい,’ I said.

I’m sorry.

I threw the Ace of Hearts onto the discard pile.

The two men shot out of their seats, yelling frantically. I tried to tear my eyes away, but couldn’t, as two lasers pierced through the ceiling and struck them where they stood.

The two bodies crumpled to the ground, and all was still.

‘GAME CLEAR – CONGRATULATIONS!’

I don’t know how long I remained seated in my chair, but I felt that if I moved, I would collapse too. Swallowing, I took two fingers and pressed them to my jugular, feeling for my pulse.

I had won. I was still alive.

I was still here.

The phone on the table beside me flashed with a message. According to this game, I had a four-day visa, whatever that meant.

It didn’t matter though, all I needed right now was to sleep.

Rising unsteadily, I cautiously approached the where the invisible barrier had been. For all I knew it was a one-way system, and I didn’t want to make a stupid mistake after all my effort in the Rummy game. So, as a test, I picked up a tiny vase and threw it across the entrance.

Nothing.

It was like the lasers had just disappeared altogether.

Tentatively reaching my fingers through, I deemed it safe, and made my way back down the hall to the store entrance. I didn’t know where to go, or how to live in a world like this, but if books and movies had taught me anything, I needed to make some kind of camp, perhaps even head to a food store to collect some supplies –

I stopped.

On a small side table near the entrance doors, a card lay facing up. The Four of Diamonds. The same Four of Diamonds that had flashed on the screen on my phone. The game’s difficulty.

But when did it get here? Perhaps someone had come by whilst I was still playing.

Shrugging, I pocketed it and stepped outside into the ghostly darkness of Tokyo. Behind me, the electricity in the furniture store shut off completely.

Whatever kind of games these were, I had a feeling they were only just getting started.

[botwstoriesandsuch]

How to Play as Teba AKA Birb Favouritism By Kip

This was too big to fit in an ask so here ya go anon!

A handsombe birb with a bow and a little patience, constantly in a power squat with enough spite to rival Ganon: Here’s your guide to the best main in Age of Calamity 

Teba is so good he’s so fast and so quick like omfg holy shit those strong attack damage output fucking crowd control AND is faster than Revali and pretty much everyone else at breaking weak point gauges like holy FUCK man So don’t let the chaotic attacks fool you! 

Considering you are here and asking yourself: How the fuck do I play as birb dad? You’ve probably encountered one of two problems that prevent you from taking advantage of him. 1) wth are these attacks is he even doing damage to this moblin??? I can’t comprehend these combos because I don’t know what is going on plz I just want to shoot arrows or 2) Where the fuck IS he I can’t fucking SEE anything?!?! where did he GO I’m getting motion sick

Well friend, here I am to help you with both of those problems to help you 1) Understand what the fuck is going on and 2) Find out where the fuck he came from, and where the fuck he go, cotton eye joe

His Y stream is straight forward, quite literally. You’ll notice very quickly that his attacks move his character forward, rather than being more still and stationary like Revali or Zelda(slate). I’m pretty sure his Y stream (as in, a pure Y combo with no X/strong attacks) has the furthest distance in the game, perhaps rivaled only by Riju. So basically, save your big Y combos for crowd control and NOT bosses like Moblins and the such. You don’t want to move your directional input too much, since his attacks have incredible distance and range already.

Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y: Sweep left, sweep right, charge forward, mid-air arrows forward, stomp land, large spiral forward, flash stomp to ground, to an ending backflip. 

You can see the distance here, again, with no directional input at all. Just pressing Y.

So just remember that even though the attack looks very chaotic, it’s really just a big fat straight line. 

In all honesty though, you could forget about his Y stream all together. Any benefit to them is basically trumped by his different combos which are superior in both one-on-one battles, and crowd control. 

Technically on it’s own, Teba’s combos are just good. He’s got a wind stream here and a loop twirl there. But what makes his combos arguably one of the most powerful in the game, is this ability here

This is pretty much the single handedly the most powerful perk Teba has, and it’s not even his Unique Action! It’s slightly similar to Link’s additional X action, but better in everyway. One of the draw backs of many strong attack combos are the slower speed it takes to dish it out, but this perk basically makes that draw back obsolete. It not only gives you insane additional damage, but also doubles, if not triples the length of a combo. Not to mention that half his move set is in mid-air, so the longer your combo is, the more time you’re off the ground and not taking damage. Basically, this equals fast damage for as long a length of time as you want. So! Onto the specifics

= = = = = = = = = = 

Y-X: Wind Stream. Functions essentially the same as a Y5 (spiral forward) combo, except slower. Its strength, however, lies in your additional X input, which puts you in mid air and allows you to do what I like to call an

Additional X: Arrow Pivot. You’ll know when you do it when the “Press X repeatedly” option comes up. And the end of his wind stream, Teba flies into the air and, with directional input, fires a barrage of and enemies below him up to a 360 degree movement. Final shot will be of a bomb arrow dealing additional AOE damage. You can spam the arrows for around 4 seconds in midair before it forces the bomb arrow finisher, but you can force it early by not pressing X or pressing B. In fact, for all future additional X inputs (I’ll be shortening that to AXs from now on) you can stop anytime you want but just pressing B to hover in the air. All his combos have the ability to lead into mid-air state, which can let you ride the wind and do more damage, but I’m getting ahead of myself. 

= = = = = = = = = = = 

Y-Y-X: Bomb Arrows. Teba sweeps left to right before launching into the air to fire seven bomb arrows (with his LEGS BY THE WAY) in a wide area in front of him. Deals AOE damage, of course.

AX: Instead of immediately going to bomb arrows, Teba will rapidly fire normal arrows (at your X mashing input) and can (optionally) fly forward while doing so at your directional control. This is honestly his best combo in my opinion because it not only is the best for crowd control, but is also one of the quickest ways to deplete any weak point gauges. Just remember to keep him stationary and not fly forward if you’re doing one-on-one, as you might just accidentally fly away from your enemy 

= = = = = = = = = = 

Y-Y-Y-X: Wind Bomb. Not to be confused with the speed running strategy Teba hovers in mid air and fires one massive stream of wind with a bomb arrow. It’s trail also does damage and drags enemies. Deals a LOT of damage, I believe it’s his strongest?

AX: Instead of immediately firing the wind bomb, he will fire normal arrows, but still enhanced with the wind effect. You can control the direction of any of the arrows with the controller. The finisher will be the wind bomb. While this combo deals a LOT of damage (like two normal arrow streams can take out a solid chunk of weak point gauge) It’s the slowest attack in his arsenal. There’s a larger time between each arrow strike, and if you use the full AX combo it keeps him hovering in the air for like 5 seconds, which leaves Teba pretty vulnerable. If you’re using this attack, don’t bother waiting for the wind bomb finisher and end the attack early. So while it’s technically Teba’s “strongest” in terms of damage, I wouldn’t call it his best

= = = = = = = = = = 

Y-Y-Y-Y-X: The Teba Tornado. Ok THIS is the move that has been ridiculed to death because of how chaotic it is. Teba basically swirls around in a circle and sucks any enemies into his little tornado, and then finishes with a gust of wind upwards

AX: Extends the time of the Teba Tornado, and control it’s direction, lasts for about 9-10 tornado swirls. 

DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT LOCK ONTO AN ENEMY WITH THIS MOVE. You will DIE of motion sickness, probably. Ok I mean, you could lock onto an enemy, but that’s not what this move is for. It’s intent is for gathering huge swarms of enemies into one place. The camera zooms out for a reason! It’s great for crowd control, but terrible for one-on-one. Control the movement of the tornado by moving based on the “eye” of the tornado, and not based on where Teba’s character actually is. I still stand by the fact that YYAX combo is superior, as it has better control and is much faster, but hey, this move aint all that bad once you learn how to use it

= = = = = = = = = = 

Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-X and Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-X: Arrow Strike. This is the only combo that forces you into the AX “Press X repeatedly” state. Teba does his little Y stream thing, before launching high into the air, where you are then given a circle. Move the circle around while rapidly pressing X to fire arrows wherever you choose. Ends with a bomb arrow

Note that this attack will basically make Teba invincible. This is his highest attack, and even mid air attacks won’t reach him in this state. It’s also the longest lasting combo, giving you about 7 seconds to deal as much damage as you wish. Take full advantage of this. Excellent for weak point gauges, but the set up Y attacks do take time, so make sure to use stasis. 

= = = = = = = = = = = 

Dash-Y: Small AOE stomp. Nothing to write home about, not that much damage. Just your average set up for the combos that will actually do damage

= = = = = = = = = = 

Dash-X: Flips over enemies and fires arrows before continuing forward. Honestly looks pretty badass, similar to that backflip Revali does when he was about to assassinate Link. Anyhow, good for when you just want to kill something small but have places to be so it keeps your momentum forward.

= = = = = = = = = = 

X/AX: Fires arrows high into the air. After some time, the arrows will rain back down in front of you in an amount dependent on how badly you mashed X. (Note that the arrows will always land in front of you, so if you shoot off the arrows in one direction, but then turn around in another direction, the arrows will still land in front of Teba) Ends with bomb arrows. Pretty good if you want to stack the damage with a timed combo. Also automatically strikes onto big enemies if you’ve locked onto them. Good for one-on-ones but don’t rely on it solely. 

A really good thing about Teba’s strong combos is that ALL of them are mid-air, meaning you can instantly continue any combo with your aerial attacks. As usual, your aerial combo is just Y-Y-Y-X

= = = = = = = = = = 

Aerial Y: Fires arrows in front of you. You can press Y up to three times before you’re forced into the ground

= = = = = = = = = = 

Aerial X: Teba stomps onto the ground with his talons with the aide of a gust of wind. Deals AOE. 

= = = = = = = = = = 

Special Attack: Teba gives a thumbs up of encouragement before murdering everything in his line of sight. (Damages enemies in a direct line in front of him, plus AOE)

So that’s all of Teba’s attacks. Teba’s combos are really fast with that AX damage. A good stasis plus a barrage of YYX will guarentee you a weak point break, and even if you’re slow on it, just tacking on the aerial combo will definetly break it, or at least deal headshot damage cause again, everything is midair. 

Speaking of stasis, here be the Sheikah Rune set, which is ALSO arguably the best in the game.

Stasis: Upon activation, little crosshairs will appear on your screen. Use the controller or motion controls to highlight as many enemies as you wish, and when you press X to activate, all will be stasised. Not only is this overpowered considering you can stasis as many enemies as you wish, but you also can automatically head into a combo as there is no attack animation that you need to dash cancel out of. It is also the longest lasting stasis in the game. 

Cryonis: ITS A FREE FORCEFIELD! Unlike other characters, this doesn’t spawn a usable cryonis block for you to jump off of (because *stares at Teba’s pretty much pure mid-air move set* he doesn’t need it) but instead, spawns three ice blocks that encircle you. I know that it might seem like you have to position yourself so that you have to wait until the block goes directly in front of you for it to properly counter, but don’t worry. It’ll counter all cryonis weak attacks, (by EXPLODING >:D) even if it looks like an enemy is striking you in the gap between the blocks. 

This is the quickest cryonis spawn in the game, capable of countering enemies even the singular second before they hit you with their cryonis weak attack. But other than countering those ice attacks, doesn’t do anything. Still pretty great though! 

= = = = = = = = = = 

Bombs: Teba gets a fancy Sheikah Bow, launches into mid air, and you can aim with the controller/motion to launch a powerful bomb at an enemy/horde. It is guaranteed to expose an enemy weak point gauge, regardless of whether the enemy is using it’s specific bomb counter attack. Like the Y5X combo, this positions Teba at the highest point in the air, making him immune to damage. SO not only is this a good rune for great damage and countering, it’s also a quick dodge for  if you’re in a lick of trouble. You can move out of this rune into an aerial combo/riding the wind as well. 

= = = = = = = = = = 

Magnesis: eh. It’s there. It counters weapons. It does its job. If your enemies have metal weapons it makes a little magnet storm. I was too lazy to bother getting a group of enemies with metal weapons because I killed them all with one Y sweep and didn’t feel like restarting the level. It’s magnesis. What do ya want from me. Nothings gonna rivals Slate Zelda’s magnesis combo anyhow. 

And last but not least, Unique Action! Teba can charge up his bow with ZR to deal arrow attacks that get stronger the more you charge. There are four stages indicated by a little “ding!” and also the visuals showing wind forming around Teba. 

Charge one: Fires three arrows. Pretty basic, although it has a longer range than a normal attack

= = = = = = = = = = 

Charge two: Fires five arrows, again with a large distance and higher damage than a usual Y attack

= = = = = = = = = = 

Charge three: Fires a LOT of arrows covering 180 degrees in front of Teba. Very good for clearing out crowds if you couldn’t tell

= = = = = = = = = = 

Charge four: Fires 180 degrees of bomb arrows, as well as bomb arrows into the air AS WELL as bombarding the battle field with bomb arrows from above for the next 8-10 seconds or so. 

Charge four is really what you’re looking for, although three isn’t so bad either. But there really is no excuse to not use Charge four because Teba’s Unique Action can charge at any time. So long as you’re holding ZR, whether you’re in the middle of a combo, doing aerials, blocking, running away-- the attack will be charging. And you can hold it for as long as you wish. Charge four is very very very good so always be holding down that ZR and releasing it and recharging and re-releasing. You can’t be damaged by your own explosions and you really have nothing to lose.

SO what now? Well know that you fully understand what my birb dad is capable off, here’s what to stick to. 

If you got a giant horde of bokoblins or something, just us a Y-Y-AX and go ham. It’s like a giant broom that sweeps the battlefield, doing a lot of damage. 

Stasis is your friend and your best friend and your only friend. IF you’re fighting two bosses, it’s in your best interest to use stasis to halt both of them and more. Use stasis during weak point gauges to lengthen your time which, combined with Teba’s AX attack speed, with guarantee you a break pretty much every time you use it

Even if you don’t stasis during a weak point break, stasised enemies are a good enough time to use that YYYX combo as even though it’s more vulnerable and slow as I said, when you have the ability to stasis all of your enemies, it’s as good a time as enemies to deal that big damage.

Don’t use your Charge four on stasised enemies. I mean, you can, but it’s really better for when you’re in the middle fo battle, clearing the battle field, and dealing damage even while you’re dodging. 

Don’t lock onto enemies. It just makes it easier all around. Teba like to move, let the birb move. Don’t limit him to the bird cage of the focused camera movement, it’s just easier for everyone to move the camera manually. You can snap it on and off just to focus if you want. But personal experience says it’s easier just to learn how to move the camera you lazy bum

Bomb rune is very good. It’s a free weak point stun, and a free dodge. Use it

When breaking weak point, just use the YYX combo. Yes, the Y5X is good, but honestly they’ll both get the job done, so might as well do the quicker combo and save Y5X for crowd clearing. Besides, even if your YYX doesn’t immediately clear the guage (becuase you’re SLOW at button mashing for some reason) you can continue with an aerial combo

Ending a combo and letting the final animation fully finish will drop you to the ground. Don’t. Let the final animation finish and then immediately press B, or B cancel before the final attack starts. This is because you suck on the ground cause you’re a bird. Pressing B allows you to automatically go into glide state/”ride the wind”, giving you better time to glide away to safety, or lead into an aerial combo

Your unique action charge attack can be fired even in mid air. Note that weak point smashes, special attacks, and runes will cancel any charges you make

My personal favourite combo for levels are using stasis, YYX sweep for damage, then while stasis is still going, charging and releasing a Charge Four arrow, then finish by setting up a 5YX combo. That pretty much clears all hordes, then just stasis a boss’ gauge, hold ZR while I do a YYX plus aerial, boss is stunned, use the Charge Four arrow, fall back and do some normal X attack or Ys, then finish off with the weak point.

For his seals, I’d say invest in mid-air attack damage, strong attack damage, or attack speed.  

Teba’s final Falcon Bow seal bonuses are:

Midair attack damage (Star)

Damage to foes with status effects (Star) [this is pretty useless ngl]

So I’d say stick with mid-air attack just to get the seal bonus, but don’t put all four as it, as it’ll just waste a seal slot as there’s no bonus for 5 of the same seal. So I say 3 mid-air attack, and 1 strong attack damage. But then again it’s all up for preference! 3 strong attacks plus a single star seal isn’t gonna be a bad match either

Pretty much the most powerful thing about Teba is his ability to smash a weak point pretty much the instant an enemy is down. So use his stasis and combos often. 

Although obvious his general crowd control is pretty great too! He’s jut a really well rounded character that is pretty broken and honestly rivals Impa imo

The more arrows on screen, the more chance that fps may tank...just saying. BUT! It’s not really to a rate that’s that detrimental to the experience of playing as him. Just goes to show how overpower he can be if you push yourself enough

Congrats! You have learned the ways of the bird. Now get out of my face, I’m in the mood to post more Teba gameplay....

[zosonils]

Crossover you say 👀

OKAY SO. SONIC COLOURS/MEGA MAN CROSSOVER

i don't have much in mind story wise, but i'm thinking it takes place under the same conditions as worlds collide, which i insist on believing also happened nearly identically offscreen in the game timeline because nobody can tell me otherwise. fairly basic setup of eggman and wily teaming up to cause problems on purpose and sonic and rock working together to stop them, and now there's wisps in the mix >:O i'm sure i could think up a fun excuse plot for why sonic colours happens twice and also mega man is here now, but mostly this was just an excuse to put the special interest in the hyperfixation and come up with some fun weapons for rock based on my first and favourite sonic game

each robot master is based on a wisp from either version of the original colours, which causes a little confusion given that you end up with two burst men and drill men but these ones have different EWN-XXX serial numbers and are entirely unrelated to their canon mega man counterparts. i haven't actually drawn the robot masters yet or thought up designs or personalities, just come up with their weapons and what stage they'd inhabit, but maybe i'll do that sometime. the robot masters are something like this

EWN-010 BURST MAN - weak to drill dash, gives bursting blaze, sweet mountain stage

EWN-011 ROCKET MAN - weak to cubic satellite, gives rocket jump, terminal velocity stage

EWN-012 DRILL MAN - weak to spike spin, gives drill dash, tropical resort stage

EWN-013 HOVER MAN - weak to rocket jump, gives hovering shockwave, starlight carnival stage

EWN-014 LASER MAN - weak to frenetic void, gives prism laser, aquarium park stage

EWN-015 CUBE MAN - weak to prism laser, gives cubic satellite, wii game land stage

EWN-016 VOID MAN - weak to bursting blaze, gives frenetic void, asteroid coaster stage

EWN-017 SPIKE MAN - weak to hovering shockwave, gives spike spin, planet wisp stage

i wrote up some really detailed information on how all the weapons work but i'll put that under a cut to prevent this post from getting too long! if you don't feel like reading massive paragraphs of game design ideas, here's the microsoft paint scribblings i did of all of them [sonic is there too]

BURSTING BLAZE

a chargeable attack that blasts out a sphere of fire to deal damage. charging it longer sends the fire out further and increases its damage output, but costs more weapon energy. without any charging it's a pretty standard low-range attack, but at maximum charge it functions as a screen nuke on par with the likes of rain flush, tornado blow, or astro crush. if rock takes damage while charging bursting blaze, he'll automatically release it at whatever charge level it was at when he got hit. in addition to the obvious usefulness of a fucking screen nuke, a less- or uncharged bursting blaze can be a handy way to quickly get some personal space in a tight situation.

cost: 1 unit when uncharged, 7 when fully charged [28 uses uncharged or 4 fully charged from a full gauge]. has five in-between charge levels costing 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6 units from least to most powerful.

i came up with this name first because i wanted it to have blaze in it because i fucking love blaze the cat.

ROCKET JUMP

an explosion that launches rock much higher than a normal jump would take him, about the height of one screen. in addition to the explosion at the bottom dealing damage, rock's body deals contact damage until his upward momentum stops, which tears through enemies with low health or a weakness to rocket jump but doesn't protect him against bulkier foes or stage hazards. while he can still move left or right while rocketing upwards, the only way for rock to stop moving upwards is to either naturally run out of momentum, hit a ceiling, or take damage.

some platforms can only be reached by using rocket jump.

cost: 3 units per use [10 uses from a full gauge]

obviously a joke based on the rocket jump technique in a lot of video games, lmao. rock blows himself up and ragdolls so hard he clips out of the interstellar amusement park and sonic watches as he falls past every kill plane and into infinity forever

DRILL DASH

a dash attack slightly faster than the slide going straight down, sideways, or diagonally down-left or down-right, similar to the pile driver but shorter and without upwards reach. has fairly low attack power, equivalent to two mega buster shots, but pushes surviving enemies back, allowing them to be hit again and again with a chain of drill dashes. underwater, it moves significantly faster and further, and can be fired up as well as down, unlocking eight-directional dashing.

if rock hits a solid wall he'll bounce off of it, but if he hits certain types of dirt-like walls he'll drill into them, which can uncover helpful items like health and weapon refills and occasionally 1-ups or e-tanks [probably in scripted locations].

cost: 2 units per use [14 uses from a full gauge]

i've never played mighty no. 9 but i've seen footage of like the dash thingy he can do? because it probably looks kinda like that.

HOVERING SHOCKWAVE

fires a shockwave that doesn't hurt any more than a standard mega buster shot [unless the enemy in question is weak to it], but stuns most enemies and has a fairly decent range. if you fire it in midair and then hold down the attack button, rock's falling speed will decrease dramatically, and he'll continue to float until either he hits the ground, the attack button is released, or he takes damage. hovering will cost additional energy, and if hovering shockwave is used in midair it can't be used again until rock hits the ground at least once.

cost: 1.5 units per use [19 uses from a full gauge], plus an extra 3 units per second of hovering, for a total of a little under 9 seconds of hovering taking the initial shot into account.

this one's pretty directly lifted from the hover wispon in sonic forces.

PRISM LASER

a laser projectile that either bounces off or goes through anything it hits a set number of times, maybe three to five. if it destroys an enemy its movement is unchanged; if it hits a wall or an enemy that doesn't immediately die to it then it bounces instead. can be fired in all eight directions, but once fired its trajectory is out of the player's hands. basically imagine gemini laser, then imagine it being obscenely better in every conceivable way. best used in enclosed rooms where it can bounce around a lot and doesn't have much opportunity to get lost offscreen.

some rooms have prisms in them like the ones in colours that automatically redirect prism laser, guiding them to destroy enemies blocking paths and the like.

cost: 6 units per use [5 uses from a full gauge]

cyan laser was my favourite colour power when i was a little baby because haha bright colour funny sound go wheeee. prism laser is probably overpowered because of this bias lmao.

CUBIC SATELLITE

summons four [?] orbiting cubes that shield rock from one hit each. they deal damage to enemies they touch unless said enemy is immune to the power. standard shield weapon, blue cube is a lame overly situational gimmick and i couldn't think of anything better. rock can still fire and charge his mega buster while shielded, but obviously can't use any special weapons. every time a cube is destroyed, the remaining ones spin faster, looking something like the tubinaut badnik from sonic mania. that's just a visual effect i don't know what else to write here it's a shield weapon.

cost: 3.5 units per use [8 units from a full gauge]

i think i'd like shield weapons more if i knew how to use the attacking ones to actually attack. i used leaf shield about 3 times in mega man 2 and every time i flung it in the wrong direction and got hit anyway.

FRENETIC VOID

sucks in any enemies that rock is facing for as long as the attack button is held down, drawing them to a point just in front of him. when released, the blasters on his arms [which in this form morph to look like the purple frenzy mouth] crunch down in front of him, dealing slightly more damage than a charged mega buster shot to anything that's been pulled in close enough and knocking back anything that isn't destroyed. rock can't move while using frenetic void, and if anything hits him while he's vaccuuming he drops the move without the finishing bite or knockback. this move can also draw in most types of bullets, which are absorbed and disappear if they reach the void, or continue in whatever direction they were pulled in if the move ends before they get there.

cost: 3 units per use [10 units from a full gauge]

i thought it'd be cool to combine purple frenzy and violet void somehow. i used void for the robot master name because i believe in sonic colours ds port supremacy, but the decision was ultimately pretty arbitrary.

SPIKE SPIN

what top spin wishes it was. a close-range attack where spikes emerge from rock's body as he does a speen, giving him a somewhat bigger hitbox. when he hits an enemy, he bounces off of it in a manner similar to the way sonic bounces off of everything he hits. the move lasts as long as the attack button is held down, draining weapon energy over time, and rock can still walk and jump while speening. some projectiles will bounce off of spike spin [generally small bullets like those from mets or sniper joes will bounce off while anything stronger will still hurt], and holding the move makes rock immune to spikes, allowing him to walk over them safely until his weapon energy depletes.

some items may be tucked away in places that are difficult or impossible to reach without walking over spikes, requiring the use of spike spin to reach them.

cost: 4 units per second, for a total of 7 seconds of spinning from a full gauge. the first unit is depleted the moment the button is pressed so the move can't be scummed into lasting longer.

honestly now that i'm thinking about this i might change spike spin to act a little more like how pink spike spindashes, but i was overcome by a desire for justice for top man.

i don't know how to end this post lmao but i've been thinking about this crossover for days on end. i know damn well it's a pipe dream but right now i'm in just the right mode of hyperfixation that if sega and capcom announced a sonic/mega man crossover in a video game that isn't smash lmao i would ASCEND

[chibimyumi]

how would you describe ciel’s and sebastian’s relationship? like yes literally it’s contractor and the one who agrees to the contract. but like their day to day relationship with eachother. i dont ship them but i love how they interact with one another but don’t know how to characterize their relationship.

Dear Anon,

O!Ciel and Sebastian’s relationship is not something I could fit into any inter-human relationship categories. This is because theirs is simply something that seems very unlikely for humans to have in our society. However, that is exactly what makes this master-servant duo interesting.

Most clinically, O!Ciel and Sebastian are indeed master and servant, child and adult. Though surely very rare, child-employers with adult-employees might exist in our world. What makes O!Ciel and Sebastian’s relationship unique is by no means limited to this ‘subversion’ of child-adult dynamic. Let us unpack this master-servant bond category by category, layer by layer.

1. Child vs Adult – Age Dynamic

A unique characteristic of O!Ciel and Sebastian’s relationship is how they do not behave like any child vs adult would. Sebas treats O!Ciel like a child, but he does not see his master as a child. And by ‘child’, I mean more specifically ‘a less-than-adult’ person. To Sebastian who is centuries old, a human who is 13 is as inexperienced and foolish as a 30 or 60 year old human. Instead, it seems like Sebas treats O!Ciel like a child only because it gets on his master’s nerves and it is entertaining.

We must remember that humans are cattle to Sebas, and that O!Ciel is no exception. For analogy’s sake, let us imagine a pig. Humans usually don’t have a higher regard or respect for adult pigs than they have for piglets. We don’t take adult pigs more seriously than we do piglets.

2. Master vs Servant – Power Dynamic

The most unique part in O!Ciel and Sebas’ relationship is not that a child is the employer of an adult, omnipotent demon. The uniqueness is in the detail that this specific employer has absolute command over Sebastian, and can even use the demon’s powers against him at will. We see in the Werewolf Arc for example, how O!Ciel has practically already broken his end of the contract. Sebastian was in full right to claim his payment for his service and return home. But since the contract was technically not over yet, O!Ciel stopped the demon from exerting his right with just one simple phrase: “it’s an order.”

Sebastian may seem all-powerful, but if O!Ciel wishes to make Sebas do something against his will, O!Ciel merely needs to use the binding magical term “it’s an order”. This binding term is so powerful it can infringe all of Sebastian’s personal autonomy, and it would be ““legal””. What if Sebas doesn’t want to be touched? “It’s an order, let person X touch you and get away without harm.” What if Sebas doesn’t want to expose himself to lethal danger? “It’s an order, do it anyway.”

This is the reason why SebaCiel could never work (even if O!Ciel were an adult!), simply because the power balance is inherently tipped way too much to O!Ciel’s side. A romantic and/or sexual relationship cannot work as long as the power balance is off, and true consent cannot be given on all sides. Consent that can be coerced, or cannot be withdrawn freely, is not true consent, after all.

3. Master vs Servant - Bickering

There is a lot of back-and-forth bickering between O!Ciel and Sebastian, which is very uncharacteristic of employer-employee relationships (No way I’m going to bicker against my boss!) Sometimes the bickering is light-hearted and comical, and I surmise this is part of the reason people might have the illusion that their power-dynamic is not completely off (as described above).

This light-hearted bickering is a great appeal, and it makes the master not behave like a full master, and the servant not like a full servant. On surface their contract bears semblance to a friendly relationship wherein both parties also fulfil their respective roles in this employment. This is a powerful ingredient in their usually fantastic cooperation during their missions! O!Ciel allows Sebas some freedom (when he sees fit), while Sebas returns this ‘kind gesture’ with helpful initiatives (when he sees fit). I dare say that many if not most ‘Kuroshitsuji’ fans are here exactly for this reason. Regardless of how fantastic this cooperation might be however, at core their relationship is still ‘employment’.

On the darker side however, this bickering is also one of the fruits born from insidious manipulation. In this post I discussed how Sebastian stretches his arms and legs as WIDELY as possible within his tiny constraints. To a certain extent, O!Ciel turns a blind eye (pun not intended) to it. Why though?

Of course O!Ciel is not a complete tyrant towards Sebastian, but this is the result that Sebastian managed to fight and win for himself. All the way back in chapter 138 Sebas didn’t even know O!Ciel yet, and yet he already made very clear that:

He should not try to exert too much control over him

That if he does try to do so, he should be careful with words

That if he is not careful, Sebas will take any opportunity to punish him for careless word-choice

In this small incident O!Ciel learned that if his demon misbehaves, he’d have himself to blame. THIS is the silent lesson Sebas instilled into the boy; that if Sebas mistreats O!Ciel, it is not Sebas who crossed boundaries, but that O!Ciel didn’t set the boundaries right. “O!Ciel had it coming”. This lesson taught by Sebas leans dangerously close to – if not downright within – the category of victim-blaming. (Sebas you trashy Trash Demon™, I love you.)

3.1. Circus Arc

So far in the manga, the most obvious example of this victim-blaming dynamic is the incident with the snakes in the Circus Arc. Sebas very clearly reminded O!Ciel that he is not above allowing his master to get hurt semi-mortally. O!Ciel was seething when he found out, and justly so. But did Sebas show any remorse? Of course not. Instead he blamed O!Ciel for:

Not being careful enough with his commands

Being too boring to see the ‘fun’ in this game

3.2. Jack the Ripper Arc

Far more dramatically, this same victim-blaming dynamic can found in the Jack the Ripper Arc, and this one arguably even dictated how O!Ciel is going to become as a person.

In the Ripper Arc Sebas also obeyed O!Ciel’s order to the T. But that’s it; only to the T and nothing more. Because the demon deliberately withheld information from his master necessary for the investigation, more victims fell while the case was still in O!Ciel’s hands. Who gets the blame? Jack the Ripper obviously. But who is made to bear the guilt? O!Ciel is; through the victim-blaming Sebastian made him internalise.

O!Ciel is still O!Ciel, so he probably didn’t really lose any sleep over the deaths of 5 people. But had he not been him, then surely this guilt would have been mind-crippling. However, we need to bear in mind that O!Ciel was not unaffected; had Sebas not withheld information, then O!Ciel would have stopped the murders earlier, and presented a scapegoat to the Queen. Let’s be fair, had Madam been arrested then she’d still be awaiting capital punishment. But as the Watchdog, O!Ciel pulls some strings. He would have tried VERY hard not to lose his aunt too.

As it is however, the enormous guilt about the death of his own aunt is what Sebas made O!Ciel suffer through slow and insidious manipulation. Sebas never gave O!Ciel the time to mourn his aunt, and instead pressured the boy into admitting that he ‘callously sacrificed Madam as a pawn’. He made him mentally TAKE the blame for the murder that Grell committed, and Sebas could have helped prevent.

As we can see in chapter 13, O!Ciel was desperately trying to externalise the blame, coming up with excuse after excuse, justification after justification. None however, works. Good seasoning skills, Sebas, amazing food-prep.

I am fairly certain that O!Ciel doesn’t even realise how much he’s being emotionally manipulated by his butler throughout the years. This insight about emotional manipulation and psychological abuse is something that requires a level of abstract comprehension we cannot expect from most people, let alone a 13 year old child (however smart they may be.)

4. Conclusion

In conclusion, both Sebas and O!Ciel exist in this relationship rather amicably on surface level, but they are inherently toxic to each other. Sebas is continuously manipulating and emotionally abusing O!Ciel, while O!Ciel holds the absolute power to infringe all of Sebastian’s autonomy.

This ⇊ illustration by Yana is the perfect symbolisation of their bond.

We can attach adjectives like “f*cking toxic” and “fascinating” to this relationship, but we can’t find a category of inter-human relationship to fit O!Ciel and Sebastian into. In real life there are no children who can wield magical command to strip someone entirely of their autonomy. Likewise, there are very few adults who would not consider a child as ‘less-than-adult’. Should we try to shoe-horn O!Ciel and Sebas into a human category, then we risk over-simplifying this relationship. Over-simplification of this relationship can be very harmful, because the subverted formula of “child-master and adult-servant” SEEMS to compensate for the inherent power imbalance.

Yana however, managed to write this relationship SO brilliantly complex, that Sebas will always remain the servant who is at O!Ciel’s mercy, while O!Ciel suffers continuous mental abuse despite holding the ultimate ace card against a demon. This complex relationship is the ultimate evidence that even the most toxic relationships can look functional on surface level, and I love hating it!

I hope this helps give some insight!

[inevitably-johnlocked]

can we adress how toxic some of these self/harm and suicide fics are?? as someone who has struggled with these issues, treating them as just a way for the two characters to get together, or one character to be the savior who cures someone of their problems? I'm so frickin over it. continuing to put your partner in limbo by threatening this behavior when they don't give you enough attention is a symptom of something major. This is not something i like seeing romanticized. at all.

[CONTENT WARNING FOR ENTIRE POST: heavy discussions of trauma, suicide, self harm, depression, political issue mentions, and eating disorders. Please proceed with care. I am not cutting the post because I think the message is important, so scroll past until my icon disappears <3 Stay safe, My Lovelies.]

Hey Nonny

Okay, I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt here because you mention you DO have struggles with these issues, so I’m going to state right up front here and say I AM NOT DISREGARDING YOUR PERSONAL EXPERIENCE AT ALL. Your view of this topic is valid, and it’s not something I am ever going to say is wrong for you. 

I would like to offer an olive branch, here, Nonny, and give you an alternative take on this, because I’m concerned that perhaps you are still coping with your own struggles and in return, you unwittingly and unintentionally are coming off as unsympathetic to other people’s coping mechanisms.

I KNOW how hard it is to see another view when yours is the only one that seems right, especially after a tragedy or after dealing with heavy things. But all I am asking is for you to temporarily extend some empathy as I discuss my thoughts in this post, and I apologize in advance if I come off as dickish, because, again, it’s hard to see past your own feelings, and I tend to give a “firm but understanding” approach to asks like this. It’s NOT meant to call you our personally. Just asking for an open mind.

I will tackle this ask in a similar fashion to this post here, which talks about shipping vs fetishization so CW for that, as well as like this post here, where we discuss pet peeves. My assumption here is that Nonny is unsure about what “romanticizing” actually entails, and how much this ask is basically Gatekeeping Fiction 101, a thing that’s been going on since the beginning of storytelling. The ask is perceived by me to be emotionally unaware of how unsympathetic it actually sounds, and in turn can unintentionally upset people who engage in these stories.

First thing’s first, Nonny, and I said it before, I GET IT. I understand what you’re going for here, why you feel it’s toxic, and why you think it shouldn’t exist. Here’s the thing, though: what you’re ACTUALLY calling for here is censorship and gatekeeping because YOU PERSONALLY take issue with something, want the fandom specially curated just for you, because it PERSONALLY OFFENDS YOU. And that, it itself, is what’s really toxic, here. Just because YOU are offended, does not mean that it’s not helpful to SOMEONE ELSE, and it’s selfish to make such a demand of people.

Let me explain.

As I mention in the link above re: shipping, many people read and write fics to cope with the reality of their own experiences. Nonny, your experience is NOT the same as someone else’s. Your pain is NOT universal, and you DON’T KNOW what that author has been through; for all you know, they spent 6 months in-hospital after attempting suicide, and they are now simply processing their trauma through storytelling. 

Or, “continuing to put your partner in limbo by threatening this behavior when they don't give you enough attention” ? It’s a VERY REAL THING that ACTUALLY happens in real life, and perhaps it happened to that author, or they want to write an alternate ending to their pain.

Or, “one character to be the saviour who cures someone of their problems?” is something a suicide survivor WISHES someone did for them. Because they feel alone in the world and don’t want to be alone anymore.

These stories are simply escapism for people, either to learn about or share what these mental illnesses do to people, or are the “fantasies” of survivors, of their ideal outcome to their own tragedies. Coping with guilt over the loss of someone they feel they could have saved. The brutal truth about realty.

And sometimes, it is because some people need a good cry and a feel-good happy ending, because real life? Well, it rarely has those happy endings and so few opportunities to let us cry, and sometimes life is just easier when we view it through the eyes of fictional characters. Do you not want someone to save you sometimes Nonny? And I mean metaphorically here, too. Someone to just take all of your hellish burdens off those shoulders for one day. Someone who will come in to save you from yourself. I know I do.

And, well, sometimes, Nonny, it makes people feel less alone in this socially distanced world.

They’re not glorifying that issue Nonny. They’re telling their story.

Here are some thoughts:

Romanticization: Some trendy teen outlet selling a shirt with “mentally diseased” written across it.

NOT Romanticization: A character in a story coming to terms with a diagnosis of mental illness and learning ways to adapt. Their partner is involved 100% and they learn together.

Romanticization: Sherlock merchandise being sold with “I’m a high functioning sociopath” (not mention ableist as all heck)

NOT Romanticization: A character self-harms because of depression, and character B helps the character through their pain and together they get proper therapy and treatment.

Romanticization: Calling yourself “OMG I’m so bipolar!” because it’s trendy.

NOT Romanticization: A clinically depressed author, who survived a suicide attempt, wanting to tell their story through characters the world is already familiar with, and one that a touchy subject can be expressed and understood by other people, because they’re not ready to write the “real” book. Fandom is a safety net for them.

See what I mean Nonny? We don’t KNOW what kind of pain these authors have PERSONALLY been through, and to censor them from having their voices heard and their stories told is just not on for me.

And let me be clear: YES OF COURSE romanticization happens EVERYWHERE. I am not denying that. But your ask is coming off like EVERY STORY EVER WRITTEN is glorification of something. By your logic:

Disabled people shouldn’t write about their disabilities because they’re romanticising themselves.

The authors with medical degrees shouldn’t write realistic med-fics because some where in the world, ONE person MAY HAVE had a similar experience as Character A and B.

Someone broke their foot in ballet so they shouldn’t write a story about a ballet dancer who broke their hip because it may offend ONE ballerina SOMEWHERE in space and time who got sideline at the prime of their career? 

Stories about LGBT+ people shouldn’t be written because homophobes think it’s icky.

We shouldn’t write about wizards because it offends high school catholic pastors (an actual thing that happened)? 

How about cancer stories because kids die of cancer all the time? 

Non-fiction autobiographies about holocaust survivors is not okay.

Science books offend flat earthers, so we shouldn’t write those.

Books about the Big Bang and a 4.5 billion-year-old earth offends creationists, so burn those.

A now-adult child rape victim writing their survival stories to help get their often-in-power abusers behind bars are taboo.

True crime stories from detectives on those cases shouldn’t be told because they weren’t the victim.

Non-fiction in general because someone somewhere may have had that one singular thing happen to them.

How about coping with grief over a parent’s sudden death because I personally might find offense in that since that was a horridly traumatic experience in my life?

Do you see how progressively out of touch this argument is? (the answer to all of these: authors should be allowed to write them, because stories make us human). Your argument leads down the very dangerous path to censorship of books, the internet, and history... to have people only read and learn what someone else dictates, leading to... well.

I’m not trying to be a dick here, Nonny, I’m really not. But I think you’re really missing the entire point of fiction and story telling. I feel you’re failing in the empathy game here, and failing to understand what romanticizing really actually is. 

Whenever I get asks like this, I always feel like the Nonnies don’t really know much about pre-Ao3. I come from “early internet” fandom age, and I’m talking before tags existed. Back when I had to go buy a book at Coles and guess what was in it based on a cover description. No “amazon reviews”. No “harmful content warning” stickers. You just picked up that book, and sometimes you get a sweet story about a friends exploring an alien landscape, and other times WHOOOPS ACCIDENTAL ALIEN SEX I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR. And sometimes, it ended with a dark story about death, and the reality of coping with it.

Twenty years ago, books on the shelves at bookstores and libraries were the only place you could do your reading and they certainly do NOT have tags on them... Modern tagging of stories are a REALLY recent thing introduced probably no less than 15 years ago and was perfected by Ao3 (which was started in 2009). 

These days, there is no excuse if you only consume fanfiction on Ao3. Fics are tagged with proper possible-trigger tags 90% of the time. They have a VERY METICULOUS filtering system. You aren’t being forced to read the fics, you don’t have to read the fics, so use those tag filters, they exist for a reason.

So, with that in mind, I genuinely DON’T GET this attitude about people wanting everything sugar coated and saccharine by default. Especially when you can LITERALLY CURATE YOUR OWN CONTENT. Life isn’t sugar coated. And fiction shouldn’t have to be either. People tag fics with triggers for a reason.

As they used to say back in my early internet days: Don’t like it? Don’t read it. Don’t comment, skip, next story.

And to put this ALL into perspective, so that you don’t think I’m talking out of my ass, I’m going to reveal something here: Do you know what fics I can’t read, Nonny, because they trigger me? Eating disorders. That’s self harm, Nonny, in a very different way. But you know what? I know that those fics DO help other ED people so I’m not going to sit her and tell people NOT to rec or write them. And some of those authors who write those stories are processing their own ED through those stories, healing in their own way. And you know what I do when I see one of those fics? I don’t read them, move on, next story.

I’m sorry if you perceive this as me being harsh with you here, Nonny, and you DON’T have to agree with me and you can block me and never talk to me again, and I’ll understand. As I stated at the beginning, I’m offering an alternative perspective, and helping you to see that some people take comfort in these types of stories.

I think what this all boils down to Nonny, after all of this, and rereading your question a final time to see if I missed covering anything, is that (and feel free to shit on me if I am wrong here) I’m getting the impression – as an unprofessional outsider looking in – that you’re still struggling with your inner demons, whether you realize it or not. The tone and brashness of your ask has me believing this... It feels like it was written after a trigger-moment and you needed to vent AT someone because you are alone, and that hurts my heart so much. I truly hope you find peace in your mind, soon, and I hope you have someone to talk to professionally, or at least a friend. (tw under link, suicidal ideation discussion and links to phone numbers that can help you). I only wish the best for you, my Nonny.

Anyway. I welcome other people to chime in here, respectfully, and let me know if I have the wrong take here. Because I genuinely don’t think I do, but I am not a professional, so my entire thing that took me 3 hours to write here is probably moot. I’m especially interested (on anon in my asks if you’re not comfy with revealing yourselves) on thoughts from other people who have survived the original topics here, as well as any therapists and authors as well.

Take care of yourself Nonny. And please curate your own content for your mental health. Ao3 has an “exclusionary tag system” as well, please use it. *hugs*

[iffeelscouldkill]

TSCOSI Week Day 3: Sana / Leadership

A/N: ssshhhhhhh yes I know it’s late but ssssshhhhh let’s just pretend I’m posting this 5/6 days ago

Here, finally, is my fic for Day 3 of TSCOSI Week, on the theme of Sana / Leadership! This takes place in an ambiguous point in Late Season 2. It does not have any bearing on the episode that was released today, which I haven’t even listened to yet, because I was busy trying to finish off this fic 😂😭 Energy and motivation have not been on my side lately. But here we are!

I had two ideas I could have gone with for this day’s prompt, and of course I chose the one I knew would lead to a longer fic, but it was worth it. This type of TSCOSI fic is my favourite to write - pure Rumor/Iris crew fluff and shenanigans. So enjoy!

---

The first clue Sana had that something was amiss was when she woke up.

Rather than waking to the vibration of her comm against her ear (yes, her comm had an alarm function and yes, she slept with it in in case of emergencies. She would not be taking questions at this time), she came to naturally, which she hadn’t done in months. Sana smiled to herself, stretching – and then froze.

She never woke up naturally, and the few times that she did wake during the night she didn’t feel this pleasantly well-rested. What time was it?

“Computer?” Sana spoke aloud to ELLA. “Current on-ship time?”

“The current on-ship time – is – nine – forty-three AM,” ELLA’s voice intoned. Sana sat bolt upright in her bed.

That wasn’t right. There was no way she’d slept through her alarm, and she had it set to recur at the same time every morning. Which meant…

“Sana Tripathi to all crew,” Sana said, opening up a comm line to all of her crewmates’ devices. “Hey, guys. Would someone mind telling me why my alarm didn’t go off this morning?”

“It didn’t go off because I deprogrammed it when I poured you into bed last night at some ungodly hour,” came the reply in Arkady’s deadpan tones, and Sana cringed slightly, regretting opening up a line to the whole crew. “Also, I’ve said this before, but sleeping with your comm in your ear? Pretty unhealthy, and that’s coming from me.”

“Thank you for that feedback, Arkady,” said Sana, with all the dry sarcasm she could muster.

“Prolonged comm usage, even when the comm is idle, has also been known to lead to hearing damage in a small percentage of cases,” put in RJ, and Sana’s eyebrows rose. “Something to do with a low level of uh, high-frequency feedback? So as a best practice, you should really take it out before bed.”

“RJ, are you lecturing me right now?” Sana asked, halfway between deeply amused and indignant.

“Uhhhh- n-no Ma’am! I mean, uh- no, Captain.”

“They’re right, you know,” Violet put in next. “I mean, it really is a small percentage of cases, but as your medic I have to advise you not to leave your comm device in for prolonged periods. Also, that sounds – uncomfortable? For sleeping?”

Sana sighed, resigning herself to being ganged up on by her entire crew. “Duly noted, Violet. Getting back to the subject at hand-”

“Wow, human ears are so fragile!” This, of course, was Krejjh. “They can really be damaged by comm feedback?”

“For a prolonged enough period-” RJ began to explain.

“We don’t all have your ‘superior alien senses’, dude,” put in Brian, laughing. Sana put a hand to her head.

“Guys-”

“I deprogrammed your alarm because you need a break, Captain,” Arkady cut in, almost gently. “Don’t think we didn’t notice that you’ve been pulling extra shifts so that the rest of us could take breaks, while not taking any yourself.”

“The human body is at its best when given time to rest and recover,” Violet added, also gently. “And you’re human too, Captain.”

Sana could feel her face flaming, but she was also extremely touched by the concern the crew were showing her – even though they’d apparently ganged up on her in the process.

“All right, I can admit that the lie-in was appreciated,” she said. “Thank you for the thought, everyone. Krejjh, I’m coming to relieve you in-”

“Oh, no need, Cap’n,” Krejjh interrupted cheerfully. “Crewman Park is taking your shift! He’s relieving me in ten minutes, and then Crewman Jeeter and I are going to play cards.”

“That’s really not necessary,” Sana said, beginning to feel slightly alarmed. “Park, I’m coming up to the cockpit in-”

“Sorry, Captain, but I think you’ve been outnumbered,” Park said, as mildly as ever. “Also, Krejjh promised me fruit jerky in exchange for taking the next shift, and I’m not about to give that up.”

Sana stared at the wall, running a hand over her face. “Park, you hate fruit jerky.”

“This is special fruit jerky,” Park replied, deadly serious. “The really good kind. Enjoy your time off.”

“There must be something I can do,” said Sana, realising she sounded slightly desperate.

“Uh, you can join me and Krejjh for a game of cards in ten minutes?” Brian suggested.

“Or you can relax, Captain,” Violet said, still in that gently amused tone. “It’s for one day. We promise you’ll be back to keeping us all in line tomorrow.”

The whole day?! Sana exclaimed internally. And okay, maybe the way that she balked at the idea of a day of enforced rest said something about the habits she’d fallen into.

She could at least give it a try. The crew had obviously put some thought into this – and it didn’t seem like they were backing down any time soon.

“Maybe I could use a breather,” she admitted aloud, and pretended not to hear someone’s sigh of relief over the comms. “But if any of you need anything…”

“We’ll let you know, Captain,” Arkady promised her, sounding not in the slightest bit sincere. Sana sighed.

“Okay. Sana Tripathi out.”

Or maybe by the afternoon her crewmates would let up, and she could go back to doing something useful.

---

Sana spent the next ten minutes or so trying and failing to relax with an audiobook, one of a handful she’d downloaded off the public net for sleepless nights. It just felt wrong to be lying on her bed doing nothing during the day. Normally she cherished her moments of downtime when she could get them (and okay, they’d been few and far between lately), but this felt… too much. Surely she should be somewhere else, maybe off discussing their next destination with Krejjh after they managed to resupply on Hathor, going over the new truck with Arkady to check it was outfitted to their needs, or maybe putting her head together with Park and RJ to get their analysis of the latest information about Regime movements.

And sure, they didn’t have any immediate jobs for Boss Violet that needed doing, and it was far enough to Hathor that planning their next destination could probably wait a day or two. But that didn’t mean she wasn’t needed. Even when Sana was off-shift, she tended to linger around the crew areas, just keeping an eye out; watching for signs of exhaustion among her crewmates, making sure they weren’t hiding injuries or strain. Injecting a cheery comment here or a calming word there, to keep people’s spirits up.

She was the Captain, and it was her job to look out for her crew. It had been a tough past few weeks, and Sana didn’t want to take this current peace for granted.

Sighing, Sana shut off the audiobook recording and went to the mess hall. Krejjh and Brian were sat at one of the tables, playing a rousing game of something that Krejjh dubbed ‘Reverse Snap’, where the object was to call out when you turned over two cards that were ‘spiritual opposites’. Unsurprisingly, Krejjh had been the one to devise the system of ‘spiritual opposites’, and was therefore given the power to decide whether a play was valid or not, a power that they abused liberally. Brian never seemed to mind; Sana suspected the enjoyment for him was in watching his fiancé get caught up in the game, and laughing at their ridiculous justifications for why they should be allowed to win each round.

Sana declined to get involved in the action herself, but it was a nice change of pace to just sit and spend time with two of her crewmates, without any other purpose beyond having fun. It was true that she didn’t get to do this often enough.

Unfortunately, the game came to a halt after Krejjh lost three consecutive rounds and poutingly declared that Brian must be cheating, even though he’d been faithfully citing their own rules each time he won a hand. “This is boring. Let’s go snuggle in our room and listen to RIFT!” they said.

Brian just smiled and gathered up the cards. “Okay,” he agreed easily. “How’re you feeling, Captain? More relaxed?”

Sana smiled wryly. “I do take downtime, you know. Despite what everyone seems to think.”

“Captain, you sleep with your comm in your ear,” Brian pointed out, mild and easy-going, but unerringly right, as always.

“I wish everyone would stop fixating on that,” Sana grumbled. Brian laughed.

“Look, this whole ‘enforced day off’ thing wasn’t my idea, but I am on board with the concept,” he said. Sana thought about asking him whose idea it had been, but she supposed it didn’t matter. “You deserve to have a break from looking after us all the time, you know? It was the least we could give you.”

Sana sat back in her chair, a little taken aback. She hadn’t been thinking about it in that way – that this was a joint effort by the crew to do something nice for her, to gift her with a day to herself. She’d been so caught up in chafing at the enforced idleness. But they’d all obviously pitched in on this, making sure that her shifts were covered and that everything was taken care of.

“Honestly, being Captain of this crew? It’s no hardship,” she told Brian – and Krejjh, who was hovering by the table – honestly. “But… thank you. It’s an incredibly sweet thought, and I do appreciate it.”

Brian smiled again. “It’s really nothing,” he told her. “See you later, Captain.”

Krejjh gave her a parting salute. “Enjoy your morning, Cap’n Tripathi!” they chirped, and then bounded after Brian.

Which left Sana with some food for thought, but still nothing to do. The mess, for now, was deserted, everyone evidently occupied with their own work or rest. Should she go back to her room, or try to find something to do around the ship? She wondered whether fixing things up and doing handiwork around the ship would be classed as ‘working’ in the eyes of the crew. Sadly, it probably would.

Resigned to giving her audiobook another try, Sana got up from the table and made her way along the corridor to her room. Passing by the medbay, she noticed that the light by the door was green, which meant that it was open, and she could movement from inside. She knocked, wondering if Violet would want a hand – or some company.

“Come in,” Violet called, and Sana pressed the button to open the door and stepped inside. Violet was inside, surrounded by rows and groups of orderly supplies - evidently doing that full inventory she’d been planning. She didn’t look surprised to see Sana.

“Can I… help with anything?” Sana asked. Violet gave her a wry smile.

“I don’t have a dictionary on me, but I’m pretty sure this wouldn’t come under the definition of “relaxation”,” she teased. Sana put her hands up.

“All right, granted. I can just keep you company for a while, then? Unless you prefer to work in silence.”

“Company is welcomed, Captain,” Violet told her. “And actually, there is something I could use a hand with.”

Sana was about to ask what it was, when she followed Violet’s gaze up to a high shelf full of supplies that she’d evidently been unable to clear. “Oh! Sure, I can help with that,” she said, trying not to seem too outwardly pleased at the opportunity to do something. Judging by Violet’s expression, she probably hadn’t succeeded. “Do you want them all down?”

“Yes, please, Captain.”

Sana got to work lifting boxes of what appeared to be empty syringes and some basic first aid supplies – bandages, gauze, cooling packs – down off the shelf and handing them to Violet, who made a noise of satisfaction when she saw what they contained. “So, how’s the overall situation with our med supplies?” Sana asked her. “Anything we need to restock?”

Violet gave her a sidelong glance, and Sana huffed. “If you want me to just turn off the part of my brain that’s concerned about the well-being of this ship, I’ve got some bad news for you.”

Violet laughed a little. “Okay, fair. We’re pretty well-off for med supplies, though I’d like it if we could get some more heptocaldrin – for injuries, not as a… stealth weapon.”

“Can’t it be both?” Sana joked. “I’ll put some feelers out with contacts who have connections with medical suppliers, see if we can get hold of some. – After today,” she added hastily at Violet’s raised eyebrow.

“Thank you,” Violet said, smiling serenely. “Are you planning to stay and watch me sort these?”

“Well, since I have so much leisure time at my disposal today,” Sana said lightly. “Can I sit here?” She gestured to the recliner that sat in the corner, the spiritual successor to the much-loved beanbag chair.

For the first few minutes, neither of them said anything much. It was quite soothing watching Violet work, although Sana itched to actually get involved and help her. She couldn’t help taking note of the condition of the medical supplies as Violet sorted them and made notes on her checklist, thinking about where they could find better-quality suppliers.

“Can I ask you something, Captain?” Violet said. Sana felt almost like she’d been caught out, though Violet’s tone was casual, almost idle; she hadn’t looked up from her work, still methodically sorting supplies.

“Of course,” Sana said.

“You’re always making sure that the six of us clock off and get enough rest. Why don’t you ever do the same for yourself?”

In hindsight, Sana should have known this question was coming. Before today, she likely would have given it a chipper, joking answer (like she did when Violet asked her, a few weeks after their flight from New Jupiter, how long she had been on shift), but now she made herself give the question some proper consideration.

“It’s different when you’re the one in charge,” she said after a little while. “If something goes wrong, if there’s an eventuality that I’ve overlooked, that’s on me. And given our current – status – the consequences of that could be much worse than me going without a break, or a couple hours of sleep.”

Violet gave her a sad smile. “But those are important things. I know it’s easy for me to say, when I don’t have to feel the weight of that responsibility – I couldn’t do what you do. But you’re at your best when you’re well-rested, too. What happens if you overlook something because you’re underslept and you haven’t had a break in days?”

“Well, that’s what I keep you all well-rested for,” Sana said lightly.

“Captain,” Violet said reprovingly.

“Violet,” Sana replied in the same tone. Jokingly, she said, “Are you going to start singing at me to take a break next?”

Violet blinked confusedly at her before the light of understanding dawned in her eyes. “Was that a ‘Hamilton’ reference?”

“You spend enough time with Arkady, you find yourself making opera and musical theatre references without even knowing it,” Sana replied. “You’ll need to watch out for that.”

“I’ll be on my guard,” Violet said. And then, more seriously, “But if it turned out to be a reliable method, then yes, I would sing at you.”

Sana couldn’t help laughing. “Well, luckily, there’s no need. Here I am, taking a break.”

“Uh huh,” was all Violet said, giving her an appropriately sceptical look.

“I am!”

“And if I asked you for your opinion on the overall quality of our med supplies, I’m sure you wouldn’t have any thoughts at all,” Violet said pointedly.

“Well, you can ask,” Sana replied. “But I’d have to tell you that the Captain will get back to you about that tomorrow, when she’s back on the clock.”

“Oh, good to know.”

 ---

Spending time with Violet in the medbay took up another hour, but before long Sana found herself back in her room and at a loose end again. And okay, maybe she was going about this wrong; she shouldn’t just be looking for ways to kill time all day. Plus, spending time with the crew was nice, but they were all busy with their own jobs, so that didn’t really equate to relaxation. There had to be something she could do by herself – other than listening to that audiobook.

On the Rumor, Sana had spent a lot of her downtime in her room working on sewing or embroidery projects. But lately, she hadn’t really had a project that she could – wait.

Sana sat up straighter on her bed, thinking. When they’d been putting together the ‘shopping list’ of supplies for Hypatia, she’d joked about adding a hammock to the list. She hadn’t seriously gone looking for one, but when she’d been checking out some of the hardware stores near where they made landing, looking for parts for the engine and the ship’s various systems, she’d discovered that they also sold swathes of fabric, rope, and – crucially – wooden poles.

Sana got up and went to the little closet built into the wall of her room. At the back, right where she’d left it, was a bundle of poles and rope with brightly-coloured fabric wrapped around it. Sana pulled out the bundle, breaking into a grin. She hadn’t really expected to find enough time to work on this when she’d bought the materials, though she’d vaguely intended to do a bit here and there. But now was the perfect time to try and put it together.

Sana unrolled the bundle on her floor and got to work.

---

“Incoming call from… Ignatius Campbell. Incoming call from… Ignatius Campbell. Incoming…”

Sana was in the middle of sewing the wooden poles into either end of her hammock fabric when the call came through to her comm link. “Computer, accept call. Campbell, hi!”

“Captain Tripathi!” Campbell’s voice boomed cheerily. “Is this a bad time?”

“It’s a pretty good time, actually,” Sana said as she worked the needle in and out of the fabric. “I’ve got the day off today, so I’m just doing some sewing in my room.”

There was a fractional pause on Campbell’s end. “The day off, huh?” he said. “How’s that going? Not too bored, I hope?”

Sana smiled to herself as she tied a knot in the sewing thread to secure it and then bit off the thread. She had scissors, but they were buried somewhere in the heap of fabric and she couldn’t be bothered to root around for them. “It was a bit slow to start off with, but I’m getting into it now.”

“Gotta say, I can’t believe they actually managed to persuade you to take a whole day out of your schedule to relax,” Campbell said. “The last time I called, you hadn’t slept in – was it thirty-six hours?”

“Thirty-two,” Sana said quietly, to herself.

“-And you were on your sixth cup of coffee – do you even remember that call?”

Sana sighed, part amusement and part resignation. “Yes, I do remember. Sorry for-”

“No, no, it’s fine, I was just – well, it was a bit worrying,” Campbell said. “Anyway, glad you’re taking a break. You sound… better.”

Who knew that everyone had apparently been so concerned for her wellbeing? Sana thought. Then her hand stilled in the middle of threading her needle. Maybe she should have realised how concerning it was to everyone. But she hadn’t thought – well, she guessed she hadn’t noticed that everyone was looking out for her just as much as she’d been trying to look out for them.

She cleared her throat a little. “Well, what can I do for you, Campbell?”

“Oh, nothing in particular,” Campbell replied. “Just wanted to call to catch up, really. Trade some gossip, funny stories about the crew… It’s been a while since you were able to stop by.”

Sana smiled ruefully, and then a thought occurred to her. “So, you just so happened to call to catch up on the one day when I don’t have anything going on? That’s good timing.”

“Uh—” Campbell’s cornered response was immediately telling. “I might’ve heard that – today would be a good time to call—”

Sana huffed in amusement again, rolling the fabric over the pole at the other end of her hammock and lining up the ends of the material. “Be honest, Campbell. Did the crew ask you to check up on me?”

“I called the ship’s comms last night, and Arkady picked up,” Campbell admitted. “I really was calling just to see how you all were, and well, she filled me in on how things had been lately. How they were all planning to cover your shifts and chores today to give you a break. She said that you might be at a loose end, so I offered to call you back around this time. I would’ve called earlier, but Eloise asked me to watch the boys in the morning.”

“How are they?” Sana asked, smiling.

“Oh, as full of energy as ever, I can barely keep up with them,” Campbell said, a smile in his own voice. “Look, I’m sorry if I overstepped-”

“No, it’s – fine, Campbell. Really,” Sana assured him. “I’m touched at how everyone’s been…” She searched for the right phrasing. “I’m touched at how much thought went into this. It really means a lot.”

“What you do means a lot,” Campbell responded, sincere. “To the whole crew. And to… me.”

Sana’s face warmed, and she realised she’d been sitting there, holding the fabric together without doing anything for the past several minutes. She picked up her needle and began on the same neat row of stitches that she’d made at the opposite end. “Thank you, Campbell.”

“It’s nothing, really,” Campbell replied gruffly, and then cleared his throat. “So – any good stories to share?”

“I’ll make you a trade,” Sana offered. “One story about the crew, for every story about your nephews.”

“Oof. You drive a hard bargain, Captain Tripathi, but I accept.”

Sana laughed. “Okay. Well. You might remember how Arkady has an unfortunate habit of leaving some of her weapons holsters in odd places around the ship…”

---

A few hours later, the new hammock – strung up in a corner of the mess where Sana had mounted some sturdy hooks on two adjacent walls – was almost ready. All it needed was a test subject; Sana could of course get in and test it herself, but it would be ideal if she could observe someone else getting into the hammock, so that she could judge how things looked from the outside.

Oddly, the mess hall was deserted, and had been for the past while, which was strange; she would have expected to find at least one or two members of the crew spending time in here. Just then, she spotted RJ, who had entered on the far side of the room and frozen.

“RJ!” she said happily. “You’re the perfect person to test out my new hammock.”

“Uh-” RJ looked around, as if hoping to be rescued by someone, before reluctantly walking over. “You’ve been making a… hammock?”

Sana gestured towards her creation with a flourish. “What do you think?”

RJ’s eyes narrowed as they inspected her handiwork, pulling lightly on the ropes that suspended the hammock. “Is it structurally sound?” they asked doubtfully.

“Why don’t you get in and test it for yourself?” Sana invited them. “Don’t worry about the hooks – they’re the same kind that you find on industrial pulleys. They’ll hold.”

RJ’s eyes flicked towards the doorway. “I’m not really sure if I should be-”

“Oh c’mon, you can take three minutes out of your shift, can’t you?” Sana cajoled them. “Just blame it on me waylaying you.”

RJ laughed a little. “Well – I guess if it’ll only take a minute…” Gingerly, they hoisted themself up onto the hammock, legs dangling over the side, before swivelling round and reclining more fully in the hammock. “Wow, this is actually – really comfortable.”

“Isn’t it? Hammocks are the best,” Sana enthused. “Is the amount of rocking okay?”

“Yeah, it seems fine. It’s not making me seasick, at least,” RJ joked. “You’ve done a pretty good job with the placement of-”

“RJ, there you are,” Park’s voice came from the other side of the mess. “Did you- oh, hi, Captain.”

“Hey, Park,” Sana said easily as Park approached, eyeing the hammock with curiosity. In the hammock, RJ sat back up, a guilty expression on their face. “RJ was being good enough to help me test out this hammock I’ve been making.”

“So I can see,” Park said, neutrally. “Seems like a good use of your time off.”

Sana raised an eyebrow at him, unsure whether the comment was sincere or impeccable sarcasm, but deciding to interpret it as sincere. “Thank you,” she said. “Want to test it out? It would be good to get data from someone taller.”

“I’d love to help, but I really need to borrow RJ,” Park said apologetically. “Sorry, Captain. Maybe after dinner?”

“Of course,” Sana said, as RJ quickly got out of the hammock. She watched Park take their arm and almost steer them away, the two of them conversing in hushed whispers once they were far enough away that they evidently thought she wouldn’t overhear.

Something odd was going on. Sana glanced at the hammock, and then back at the doorway that Park and RJ had just left through. Maybe she should leave it alone – after all, she was off the clock, and she didn’t have to know about everything that was going on on the ship.

Even though Park and RJ were behaving really strangely.

After a few seconds, Sana’s curiosity got the better of her, and she quietly followed.

“Well, I can’t go back through now,” RJ was saying to Park in slightly annoyed tones, as they walked down the corridor. “The Captain will definitely know something’s up. Anyway, I don’t remember seeing a screwdriver in the kitchen.”

A screwdriver? Sana thought, baffled.

“Well, Arkady says there are none in the engine room, and there’s not many other places on the ship left to check,” Park said tiredly. “So, if you’d like to tell her that you weren’t able to look in the kitchen…”

RJ made a reluctant noise. “Fine, what if we-”

Sana, from her vantage point around the corner, saw the two pause in front of the door that led to the medbay. Park raised his hand and knocked on the door in a specific pattern – one long, and three short knocks. After a second, the same knock came back and the door opened.

“Bad news,” Park said as the two entered the medbay. “Sana was in the mess, so RJ wasn’t able to check the kitchen properly.”

Sana moved around the corner until the open door of the medbay was in view, where a baffling sight (and this was coming from someone who’d seen a lot of weird things in her time) greeted her. The medbay observation table had been dragged into the middle of the room, and an array of screwdrivers, knives, and for some reason, spoons cluttered the tabletop. Arkady, looking irritated, was standing on top of the table with a knife in her hand, trying to pry at the cover that enclosed the medbay’s ceiling lamp. Violet, Brian and Krejjh were grouped around the table, looking up at what Arkady was doing; Violet was holding a penknife and shining a small torch in Arkady’s direction, while Krejjh was holding a small hammer, a steel rule and a lightbulb. Brian just looked entertained.

“I think we should check the engine room again,” RJ said. Arkady rolled her eyes.

“I told you, McCabe, I – Captain!”

Instantly, every crew member in the room (except Park, who simply looked resigned) whipped guiltily around, trying in vain to hide what they were doing. Krejjh dropped the steel rule.

“Cap’n Tripathi!” they said cheerily. “You are just in time for our – uh – table performance art routine! We’ve been practicing specially for you!”

“Really?” Sana asked, amused. “Because it looks to me like you were all trying to change a lightbulb. Badly.”

“As it so happens, Act One of our performance-”

“Krejjh, give it a rest,” Arkady said, as Brian laughed behind his hand. “Captain, we’re fine, honestly. We found the replacement bulb, we just need to figure out how to get this damn cover off.”

“And how long have you spent trying to pry it off, so far?” Sana asked.

“It’s been about an hour and a half,” Violet admitted. Arkady’s shoulders slumped.

“I’m almost there, but I think I need a different screwdriver to-”

She stopped as Sana walked over to the table, and held out a hand for Arkady to pull her up. Climbing onto the table, with the help of a steadying hand from Park, Sana took a magnet out of her pocket (she had a lot of things in her pockets) and held it near the rim of the ceiling lamp cover. A tiny screw flew out and clung onto the magnet. Sana held the magnet to the other side of the cover, attracting another screw, and then another, and another. Finally, she twisted the cover, and it popped off the ceiling.

“Lightbulb,” she said.

Krejjh handed her up the lightbulb, and Sana switched the working bulb out for the dead one, before easily replacing the cover and pushing the screws back into place. She dusted her hands and looked around at the crew.

“Well, that was fun. What’s Act Two?”

Violet smiled, and RJ looked impressed, while Brian shook his head. “I told you we should have just asked her.”

Sana looked back at Arkady, who was glowering at the knife she’d been holding like it had personally offended her.

“You could have asked me,” she agreed. “But I get that you were trying not to disturb me after you worked so hard to give me some time off. And, honestly, it’s been one of the best days I can remember for a while. So – thank you all. So much. I know that being the Captain doesn’t make me invincible. Or infallible. And as much as I want to look out for all of you, I need to remember to apply the same thought process to myself as well.” She caught Violet’s eye, and winked.

“In hindsight, it probably shouldn’t have taken a day of forced rest for me to see that, but I’m grateful that you were all willing to go to the trouble of arranging it so that I could. Even to the point of changing lightbulbs.” She smiled.

“And while you’ve all been working hard, I’ve rigged up a pretty awesome hammock in the mess hall, so it would frankly be a crime not to hold a movie night after dinner.”

Krejjh whooped, and Brian and RJ immediately struck up a fierce debate about whether they should watch a historical fantasy drama or a sci-fi epic. Park tiredly followed them out of the room, presumably to act as adult supervision.

“I’d better go make sure that they don’t forget about dinner,” Violet said, and went after them.

Arkady climbed down so that she was sitting on the edge of the table, and after making a space in the collection of cutlery and engineering tools, Sana joined her. For a few moments, neither of them said anything.

“I meant what I said just now,” Sana said, eventually. “I had a really good day, and… it meant a lot that everyone would go to the trouble of doing something like that for me. And of thinking it up and arranging it.”

“Violet did a lot of it,” Arkady said, a little too quickly. “And Park, especially with covering your shifts. And the comm thing was Krejjh’s idea.”

“Really?” asked Sana, amused. “And what about intercepting the call from Campbell that came in last night, making sure it didn’t disturb me, and then arranging for him to call back when you knew I might be going a bit stir-crazy?”

Arkady huffed. “He told you.”

“Of course he did,” Sana said. “Look, I’m sure it was a group effort, but… I couldn’t help thinking that the idea had to have come from someone who knew me pretty well. And maybe someone who’s been more worried about me lately than they wanted to admit.”

Arkady looked away, her shoulders raised in a defensive half-shrug. “I know you’re the Captain. I know you’ve got to look out for us, and – it’s not like I can really talk when it comes to putting in too many hours when I work on something. I don’t think there’s anyone in the crew who hasn’t done that at some point. But you’re always there to kick our asses into taking a break, and-”

“And someone needed to do that for me?” Sana finished for her, wryly.

Arkady looked back at her and snorted. “Pretty much. Thirty-two hours, Sana. With six cups of coffee.”

Sana winced. “In hindsight, that was probably the first red flag.”

“The first?”

“Okay, okay,” Sana said, laughing a little and holding up her hands. “You have my word that I will not let things get to that point again. And if they do, you have my full permission to-”

“-Kick your ass?”

“I was going to say, ‘put me in time-out in my own hammock’, but either works.”

“Speaking of which,” said Arkady, giving Sana a significant look. “Do I need to ask which part of the ship lost its emergency harnesses?”

Sana laughed. “This one is made from actual wood and fabric and rope. Turns out, I had a lot of time on my hands this afternoon…”

“And you used it to build another hammock.”

“It was that, or listen to a really dull audiobook,” Sana said. “I call it an investment in future relaxation! And future movie nights. Good for the whole crew.”

One half of Arkady’s mouth ticked up, and she looked almost wistful. “We haven’t had a movie night since we were on the Rumor.”

“I want to reinstate the tradition,” Sana said. “I think we could all use a bit of a breather every now and again. Today reminded me of that. So – thank you, Kady.”

She was purposely laying it on thick, because winding up your best friend with excessive sentiments that you meant every word of really never got old. She was rewarded when Arkady quickly jumped down from the table. “I think we’ve already done the Feelings Corner for this evening, so if you need me, I’ll just be in the kitchen, helping with dinner.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to hear the latest motivational speech I’ve been working on?” Sana teased her. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about it today. It’s a good one.”

“You know what, I’ve changed my mind,” Arkady said. “You’re not allowed to have days off any more.”

---

A/N: This idea came about as a bit of an inversion of the ‘leadership’ prompt - what if Sana couldn’t be in charge for the day? What would it look like if the crew decided she needed to take some time off? I was really taken with the concept (apparently I just have a thing for members of the crew gently but insistently taking care of Sana), and then I came up with the idea that something goes wrong that Sana would normally be able to fix, and the crew is desperately trying to keep it from Sana while she’s “off-duty”. This image popped into my head of like, the entire crew trying and failing to change a lightbulb, and it was so absurdly perfect that I had to write it xD

It also wound up being a spiritual continuation of the theme we’ve had so far in Season 2 of “Sana is bad at clocking off” - hopefully nothing in Episode 3 has come along and contradicted that xD (Guess I’ll find out!)

[roseyful]

Mars Red: Edge of the Nightmare - Review

Now, my Tumblr has been a bit quiet lately (been queuing a lot of things so then it wasn’t too quiet during my absence), but it has been for a good reason; last month I was approached [on my private twitter account] and asked if I would be able to playtest a game and write a review, and of course, being someone that enjoys games, especially those that follow an otome style, I had to say YES.

So its proud to say that after a while of playing the game, I finally get to write this review.

Now before I get into the game itself, I would like to take the moment to give appreciation to the team for being so helpful during my time of playtesting the game and before that, as not only would they let us know when there was an issue and the date had to be pushed back, they were so polite and helpful whenever I would run into a problem. That’s something you’d want to see in a gaming company and I’m so glad that my first experience with this company is one with positive results. I personally found no issues with the team themselves, and I do hope they keep this up after the release. Thank you favary for being so lovely and patient with me, and other beta testers.

Mars Red: Edge of The Nightmare was the game that they asked for me to play, however when I originally looked at their website, I couldn’t help but notice that the concept was originally one of a ‘Sound Theatre’, and while I couldn’t figure out what that was, I eventually was lead down a rabbit hole and ended up looking at the other things that Bun-O Fujisawa has worked in. Very interesting stuff, just like the game. However, it’s best to look at his other stuff in your own time.

Please note: I will be keeping this spoiler-free for the sake of letting people go in with no idea of what’s going on besides what I mention and on the website.

Story

The game is set in the early twentieth century in Japan, or better known as the Taisho, in which the website also says ‘[is] influenced by Romanticism’, in which vampires rule the night, as they could only feed off blood and those that stepped into the sun would surely die. Keen senses, incredible physical abilities, and yet they were still vulnerable. You see that very early on with the main character that we play as; Yutsufusa Yuki, a vampire whom became one against his will.

I will be honest, I did not like Yutsufusa when I first started playing, as I felt like he was a bit too willing to die, but that is something that you can overlook when you get further into the story. Yutsufusa is obviously one of the youngest in the group, due to the fact he wears the more ‘modern’ [at the time] clothing out of everyone, well, there is someone else who wears similar clothing but he’s human.

You control Yutsufusa throughout the game, influencing his voices and living his life through his eyes, him acting as the reader insert as you learn about the other characters and begin to grow a bond with them. While the story is a bit slow at first, it does start picking up around the middle-end of chapter 1 and the beginning of chapter 2 after you play the prologue, as you begin to assist “Code Zero” in their work to rid the world of vampires that wish to feast on humans..

Be mindful that there is an anime, however, Yutsufusa does not appear in it, as it focuses on the other main characters, so if you have watched the anime already be sure to remember that they’re either two separate timelines or different points in time. I do not want to confuse anyone with this.

The main cast is quite an interesting bunch, as it covers a wide range of personalities, and sometimes even time periods as you play through the game and unlock things; you might say you might learn a bit of history from it if you end up looking up some of the references I’ve found in the game. This is a great reflection on the idea of ‘immortality, and even has moments where said immortality leans into a few jokes (such as knowledge of birds).

If you’ve played games such as ‘Ikemen Revolution’, you may be familiar with the ticket system. Every day you’re allowed a certain amount of tickets to progress through the story, however, if you run out of tickets and you must read more, then you’re able to progress the story via using ‘amber’, the game’s currency that you can use for different functions. However, this is not needed, as every day your tickets will be replenished. I personally found myself not even needing to use my amber, as I would always wait for the next day. There are mini-stories that you can get if you finish a chapter within a certain amount of time, but I personally don’t find them to progress the story a lot after I read the first one I got. Then again I had other things to occupy my time while I wanted as well. If you wish to reread chapters, you get a bonus third option of currency; coins. Coins can be used to reread chapters in the place of amber or tickets, which means that you can grind out coins via the exploration option in order to see more options (looked at a bit later).

I personally found the story to be engaging, between the use of minigames (or investigations, covered a bit later), it broke up the reading with fun activities that progressed the story.

Is the game an Otome?

No! I was shocked as well when I saw the all-male cast since I was wondering if I was playing a boys love game, but in the end, I was pleasantly surprised to find out that this is actually a detective game. While it may carry the usual look of an otome, with the story and choices of how you speak influencing the endings of chapters, the game more feels like one of finding new friends and solving kick-ass investigations than finding romance. It’s refreshing.

This is especially true between the minigames in which helps influence the story that is all very unique in their own way and do not seem repetitive once you get into the flow of how they work.

Minigames

The minigames come forward in two forms; investigation, interrogation, and infer. Investigation sounds exactly how you’d expect, as you have to poke around and look at things, which you can review in a little notebook that sits in the top right of your screen in the case you need to review what you’ve looked at. When I was first launched into this section for the first time, I had a little trouble remembering exactly what I needed to look at (as I was given a set of things to tap), however, I do have to thank the team for thinking ahead and adding the option to be able to watch ads in order to see what you need to do. This was one of the two times I’d have to watch ads, as they don’t shove them in your face every few seconds like most mobile games do which is rather nice. Sometimes you gain information or items that you have to use later, so it’s a good idea to keep track of what you look at.

Interrogation acts as a question-based information gathering, in which you talk to NPCs in order to gather information to use in the investigation. Like Investigation, these points are put into your notebook for later.

Infer takes the first two investigation segments and combines the information, as you now get interrogated by one of the main characters, and you must respond back with the proper information in order to make sure that this segment is successful. You are able to read back on the notes from the other segments at this point by pressing the button with the book icon in the upper right corner, as this aids you in selecting the right answers. When I first came to this section, I did feel under pressure due to it, but it was interesting to see the negative answers from the character if I got it wrong.

Exploration is another part of the game, that while outside the story, there are parts that require a certain amount of story points in order to clear ‘point blocks’. This is where you get the coins from and frankly is good to use once you have finished using all your tickets for the day and want to use the rest of the time to grind coins. During the exploration, you set up 2 characters, a place, and a set [in real life] time of how long you want them to be out and about. Depending on the number of points earned, you may earn something called a ‘mummer’, which reveals more about the characters you chose to send out, and even get dialogue of the characters interactions (which can be pretty funny in itself) that shows the dynamic of the two characters- are they friends? Are things tense? You get to learn more by sending them out together.

Artstyle

As an artist, I was incredibly pleased with the art of the game, as the characters do not look the game, there are different body types and ages (from teen to elder), you never had to look at the same face twice for two characters. I will be honest, I do wish the characters were a bit more ‘animated’ with their expressions (such as body movement when they’re feeling certain emotions), however other than that, the sprites are magnificent.

The backgrounds are also really interesting to look at and even tell so much story before you even start investigating within the investigation sections. The design team also needs props, because while a few characters are wearing similar outfits, they’re all wearing them in different ways which shows their character and even the way they probably fight. Though I will say I am a bit biased towards Takeuchi, then again, I really enjoy fun and loud characters in general, and his hair is interesting in a sea of mostly black, purple, silver or blonde hair. Maybe will make a fanart of him in the future if I learn to draw his eyepiece. (on that note, please release the full sprites for us artists to reference, we’d love you eternally for it haha).

Oh no, it’s a-

Yes, its a bit of a gacha game, however, you do not need to actually play the gachas in order to progress through the game; it mostly just unlocks bits of story for those that want to have extra stories, or just want that extra dose of dopamine (haha, me). As someone who plays gacha games ever since they turned 13, I was glad that this game isn’t actually gacha centric, and thus is very free-to-play friendly due to this.

Who would I recommend this for and would I recommend it myself?

Personally, I think this is a game that suits the niche of those that enjoy a good mystery and even play those ‘find an item’ games, mixed in with those that enjoy reading otomes and history. Maybe even someone that enjoys theatre since there’s a character that does theatre. Would I personally recommend it? Yes, I would. The game is very interesting and engaging, the staff behind the game are so lovely.

Once more, here’s the game’s website link ❤️: https://marsred-game.net/en/