#I’ve added more since these photos lmao

[milk--lizard]

I drive an obnoxious car and I fucking love it

[allsketchesnononsense]

I SAW YOUR POST ABOUT THE PSYCHOPOMP HELMET AND I HAVE TO ASK HOW’D YOU MAKE IT??

i wanted to cosplay her at some point in the future but i’ve never tried my hand at prop making or anything of that matter really so i can’t wrap my head around any like basic concepts to make the psychopomp itself 😭😭

sorry for taking abit to answer, wanted to make sure I was at my PC to answer so I can give Exact Images n stuff of what I got/used

warning: you're gonna need some serious power tools for this. alotta bits I had to get help from my dad bc he has SO MANY hobbies that involve power tools lol

SO

For the base:

you need a good helmet. n finding one of those ain't easy, so you're probs gonna haveta Make Do with something you can cut parts off of.

I used something like this, but cut off the parts that jut out at the ears and the lip at the front. The internal bit that keeps your Actual Head from touching the Actual Helmet is VERY helpful bc (atleast w/ mine) it wasnt a layer of foam or anything that'd be finnicky, it was just straps.

theoretically could also use a cheap-y baseball helmet though obvi you still gotta Mutilate it

For the accessories™:

The antannae are actual extendable radio antannae I harvested from an old boombox n another thing, but you can buy JUST the antannae online

the megaphone/satellite dish bit my dad helped me cut n gut a car alarm type thing and attatch it w/ this silicone stuff he had on hand

And the headphone pieces on the sides are a set of vintage radio headphones I found at a thrift store. these to be exact (they're not v rare n go for 10-30 bucks on ebay)

Though any old, chunky headphones could easily work. These were just what I had on hand. And, as a useful thing, the metal prongs connecting to the headband were perfect to easily bolt in place on the helmet and keep them flexible for easy putting on and taking off. The little radio speaker-y bits on the outside I added my dad had laying around though obvi not 1000% Necessary

And that's all really for the easily bought supplies

The front plate is Literally just a chunk of sheet metal he happened to have on hand, and added the bolts to. The fifth bolt in the middle is the only Functional one that actually attatches to the helmet

And the bit keeping the wires in place is a piece of plastic we melted to shape, painted accordingly, then hot glued in place. Added the screws to make it look abit more Cohesive with the rest of it.

The staples specifically on mine are holes drilled then w/ v thin wire fed through and twisted and trimmed.

Some smaller seams n details I added with super glue since it gave a v subtle raised effect, and bc it cracked in shipping I had to super glue some of the cracks back together Anyways lmao

also had to do alot of spraypainting to get it the right color. Make sure to paint the "accessories" seperate before assembly bc trying to tape off everything could end up Annoying and that way the metal bolts and the plate can retain their orig metal color to add contrast.

Also make sure you get Matte paint, bc it'll look goofy shiny. Preferably something meant for outdoor use bc those will have the more gritty textures you're looking for n its easy to find.

For any extra scuffing n details I did some dry brushing w/ grey and black acrylic to add depth. Best way to do it imo is add some drybrush with a scrappy old paintbrush then wipe away some with a paper towel

or just use a paper towel with a v tiny, thinly spread bit of paint

Hopefully this helps atleast some!! If you need more detailed shots of my helmet for better reference just lemme know, I just dont feel like going to grab her rn for a photo shoot lmao

Good luck w/ your helmet!! n be sure to post it lots when you're done!!

It'll be sick as hell to see how your interpretation turns out!

just be careful bout wearing it too long

start seeing things you're not supposed to

knowing things you're not supposed to

[numbknee]

Enough of the suffering thru the asks abt all the other cartman ships, what abt your brain rot? 🥺 what *are* your thoughts on kyman?? Go ham dude

ooooh dear... where to begin with the kyman brainrot....... I guess I’ll start at the beginning. VERY LONG POST under the cut. this is basically my kyman meta magnum opus lmao

I’ve talked about this ad nauseam before, but I really, REALLY didn’t want to get into south park. I had only ever watched like 2 full episodes before 2021 and I simply did not understand the appeal. I just thought the draw to the show was the shock factors: gross-out humor, children swearing and committing violence, and blatant bigotry played for laughs. I didn’t understand how it could be so popular other than “well I guess there are lots of horrible people out there who like this horrible show.” 

I grew up in a very WASP-y town and had peers in elementary/middle school who learned about the existence of antisemitism and other bigotries through south park. because kids are stupid and don’t understand satire, many of them took it at face value and were able to have shittons of words added to their vocabulary to put people down and insult them. it was horrible tbh. and I hated the show for that, even as a young kid. I personally wasn’t perfect by any means but even as a snot-nosed, extremely sheltered little white girl I knew that you just shouldn’t do that shit. our school system in particular lauded the “golden rule” constantly (we had to do a school-specific pledge after the pledge of allegiance every day... yeah I know, very american) and I was like “cmon, you guys can’t even follow that ONE RULE to be a semi-decent human being?? really??”

anyway at the end of 2021, my younger brother asked me to watch the post-covid specials with him and he was very excited about it. I was immediately hesitant, especially because in recent years he has become alarmingly incel-y and took a hard turn to the right while I became a leftist. I reluctantly agreed to sit through it to try to understand him more because, even though his political ideology sucks ass, he’s still my brother and I do love him. 

so I watched the specials, and I came out the other side of it shell-shocked with how surprisingly good the writing was. THIS stupid show, the show that all this time I thought was bottom-of-the-barrel comedy, was... GOOD??? particularly regarding CARTMAN?? 

the only things I knew about cartman going into it were the following: he’s fat, he says the name “kyle” weird, and he’s a horrible antisemite. and they made him grow up to be a freaking RABBI. it completely caught me off guard and *gasp* actually made me laugh???? what???? 

there were plenty of other things I loved about the post-covid specials, like my depressed ass relating WAAAY too hard with stan, the extremely on-the-nose satire of the state of advertisement/capitalism with the stupid “denny’s applebee’s max” restaurant chain gag and all the old people being shoved into a giant prison retirement home once they aren’t productive anymore, kenny getting sick of the gang’s bullshit and writing “FUCK THESE HOES” on a beloved childhood photo, butters become a snake-oil salesman for NFTs, kyle being told to “think like a kid” and like 2 seconds later realizing they need to look up kenny’s ass. I could go on but you get the point. 

I liked it way more than I thought I ever would. and obviously, I often find south park funny for different reasons than my brother does because matt & trey are very good at toeing the line of appealing to both sides of the american political spectrum, but it’s become a point of bonding between us in the year since I started watching the show and I’m grateful for that. 

of course, since i’m terminally on tumblr and ao3, I also started to dive into the fandom of south park. I had heard about the whole creek thing years ago and waved it off as a stupid gag but then I realized wait, holy shit, there’s actually a GIGANTIC shipping culture around south park??? at first I got into style because of the interesting concept of post-covid kyle and stan reconnecting after decades apart and not being the same people they used to be but trying to make it work anyway (I even wrote a fic about it ahahaa...) 

but after a while I got tired of the ship because as I watched the rest of the show, I realized their relationship just wasn’t as interesting as I thought it would be. like they’re best friends but... why? because they’ve known each other forever? they both like video games? they make fun of cartman together? the fact they’re “super-best-friends” is kind of taken for granted by the show and the audience, but imo matt and trey never really explore the intricacies of their relationship very much. y’all can disagree with me on this but idk, all I know is that I got bored with style as a ship after like 2 months.

while scrolling through ao3 and tumblr, I ran across kyman fics/fanart for the first time back in february or so. at first I was appalled because... why the everloving fuck would you ship the blatant antisemite with the jewish kid??? really???? isn’t style a much better choice??? but sheer curiosity got the better of me, so I did what I always do when I’m curious about a ship: select for fics with kyle broflovski/eric cartman, sort by kudos, and read the first result (or in this case the second because the first had creek as the main ship). y’all know which fic that is if you’ve even slightly gotten into kyman. it was interesting, but I personally didn’t see them as the actual characters from the show in that fic. they were fandom versions of kyle and cartman, with their personalities changed enough to fit the standard mlm shipping dynamic that’s popular in fandom spaces (particularly regarding dom/sub aspects). I’ve seen it happen in plenty of other fandoms so I wasn’t surprised, but I still couldn’t see how it could possibly work if one were to use their canon character depictions. 

all the while I was making my way through episodes of the show cuz it’s long af, and over time I became more and more intrigued with kyle and cartman’s relationship. cartman quickly became my favorite character in the show because of how fucking complex and layered his personality is (see my tags on this post), and though kyle despises cartman in countless ways, he still is the only one who consistently tries to find goodness in him, tries to make him change for the better, saves him when no one else will, and remains his friend despite everything. it’s a remarkably complex dynamic.

little hints of kyman started creeping up on me: cartman being frequently queer-coded as a closeted gay kid. kyle getting extremely jealous of cartman and heidi’s relationship. both of them on separate occasions saving the other from death or injury without wanting any credit for it or lording it over each other. “we've been through a lot together, and... maybe that alone doesn't make us friends, but it makes us something” 

needless to say, I started to get it. and then I encountered the straw that broke the camel’s back: “know your enemy” by elsen on ao3. I’m not exaggerating when I say I’ve read that fic probably over a dozen times. it was shockingly well-written and so in-tune with the style and tone of the show that I was like “is this person spirit-channelling trey parker or something wtf???” and all of a sudden, I could see how, in a different universe, kyman could actually be an endgame ship. 

what sold me on it the most was how in-character it seemed for cartman to be a repressed, denial-ridden sub, especially regarding his desired relationship with kyle. there’s plenty of canon evidence that cartman has a secret crush on kyle (see this vid by johnny 2 cellos), but there’s no way that kyle could reciprocate those feelings, right?? imo kyle would probably rather die than enter a romantic relationship with cartman where he had to submit to him all the time, but if cartman would want kyle to be dominant over him??? where kyle has control and is able to curb cartman’s problematic behavior as he sees fit??? that opens up a whole other door of possibilities.

I think what kyle wants more than anything else in the world regarding cartman is for the goodness he sees deep down inside him to come to the surface, and for kyle to be the one to guide him (or force him when necessary) to becoming a better person through love and patience and inherent understanding of his fucked up little head??? I can definitely see kyle wanting that (especially since I see kyle as a repressed, denial-ridden sadist/dom lmao; see this post for my thoughts on that). 

it was all downhill from there. I found tons of other cool kyman shippers on tumblr and twitter whose writing and fanart helped suck me in even more and I’ve been stuck in kyman hell ever since. special shoutout to the asker for her kyman analysis posts that inspired this fic I wrote! love u boo <3

ANYWAY that’s how I became a whore for kyman lolololol ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿ have a nice day everybody

[akkivee]

i tried out the hypmic teas!!!!!! i’m not a reputable tea drinker, since my preferred method of making tea is to pour boiling water on my tea bag and let it stew in liquid flames for minutes i’m sure feels like hours for the bag (i like my tea strong, scalded leaves be damned lmao) but i prepared it according to the directions and tasted it for there so it should be true to flavour lol

so the instructions for brewing the tea were as follows: 1️⃣ prepare a cup of 150ml (~2/3c) hot water 2️⃣ let it cool a bit and add the tea bag 3️⃣ let it steep for 3-4 minutes!!! so what i did was boil water and after adding the amount to my tea cup, i let it cool for 4 minutes and then steeped the bag for 4 minutes (…..and some change for the photos LOL)

❤️☕️: bb had a strawberry rooibos tea!!!! the tea had a very overpowering scent the moment i took it out and that was basically my warning LOL i wound up sipping that tea first and almost immediately sipped mtc’s, except that strawberry flavour lingers fr, so i almost did mtc a disservice. what was really neat about the tea tho is that for every moment the tea lingered on the tongue, the flavour changed and became bolder!!!!! i assume that was the strawberry notes changing to the rooibos notes but it was sick to experience lol!!!!

💙☕️: mtc’s flavour was yokohama afternoon tea!!!! it was an english black tea blend essentially lol but the downside of this is that, since it’s a tea i drink regularly and therefore over brew for my preferred tastes, it tasted weak to me lol, but that’s not the tea’s fault. i think it needed the boiling water personally!!!!! other than that tho, it was a lovely blend 😃

💛☕️: posse had a caramel and chestnut tea!!!!! it was a black tea blend tho, so again, it felt a little weak to me in the beginning. i wound up taking multiple sips to try and discern where the caramel and chestnut was coming from but when i could, i found it was similar to the bb tea where the flavours shifted over time. i wasn’t nearly as powerful as bb’s but i think that was again bc it was a black tea and needed hotter water to brew in. i added about 1/2tbs of sugar to each of these cups after my initial sips (i also like sugar in my tea lol i think it enhances flavour) and felt the flavours jumped more after that addition!!

🩶☕️: mtr had a jasmine tea and i’m not gonna lie lmao!!!!! after drinking this tea, it made me realise i had never had a jasmine tea that wasn’t over brewed LOL and i presume it’s bc cafes over brew for additives, but the astringency in those jasmine teas has always been off putting, even as someone who prefers astringency in black tea. now tho lol!!!!! it’s such a pleasantly flavourful tea i’m sorry we do your tea dirty lol!!!!!! thank you mtr for always guiding us to the light and showing me the error of my ways LOL

🧡☕️: dh had an apricot black tea!!!! and similar to all the other black teas before it, it needed a longer brew time or initial hotter water lol. like it came out of the bag smelling very strong so i had high expectations but was let down initially. but i was sipping on this tea as i typed this out lol with the bag still in the cup and MAN it’s such a nice flavour, especially with that added sugar!!! hotter water and a 7 minute steeping would absolutely do this tea justice 👌

💜☕️: bat’s flavour was kyouhou grape iirc???? and it’s the tea i’ve had the most trepidation about trying lol since jp grape tastes like medicine to me. i did have the bat grape candy tho and it tasted closer to grape jolly rancher that the medicinal taste i remember so i came in with a bit more hope lol!!!!! the bag had a very strong scent (it overpowered dh’s actually and dh’s was strong lol) but it’s a black tea so the flavour wasn’t as strong as it could have been. maybe that was in its favour tho bc the grape taste still shone thru even tho it probably could’ve used better brewing conditions!!!! and sugar definitely complimented that!!!! i also sipped this tea as i typed this out and tbh, that medicinal flavour became more pronounced as time went on, and it lingers lol, so i’d actually brew this as intended lol, maybe a bit longer to hit a stronger grape sweet spot

my favourite of the bunch just might be bb!!!!!

[sunmoonjune]

Ive been meaning to ask for a while but what does Bug’s mask look like to you? (Like is it a complete half mask that covers half the nose and mouth or a mask that goes around them like a phantom mask, does it have depth or is it flat, material, etc ) I’ve always been curious what you envision! ♥️

ok ok ignore how sloppy this is, but this is what I had drawn out for reference a few weeks ago (also just a random reference photo for face shape, it has nothing to do with how bug looks! bug is still sort of supposed to be the reader, so their appearance is still based on you! she just has some specific things about her that are defined, like her scars and such) also I apologize if bug ever becomes too much of an oc! that's why I added that oc!reader tag becuase I'm not quite sure if bug is becoming an oc xD

I drew this super quickly because I needed some kind of reference when I was drawing a cover for the printed version of LTM that I have a hard copy of! The cover that I drew is essentially just what's beneath the mask so I needed a reference to what the mask would cover! (I would love to show you that cover but right now it's a BIG SPOILER, so I will withhold it from you for now (also I am a terrible artist so I should probably find an artist friend or commission someone to make a book cover for me))

so the photo above is approximately how big the mask would be and what it would cover!

it would tie behind her head near her forehead so that it wouldn't obscure her left eye (also totally ignore that I drew the mask on the reference model's left side, cause I totally did not do that LMAO I forgot about mirroring xD I am def not an artist hehe )

It's definitely fairly tight against her face, like form-fitted in a way. It's very simple and definitely scuffed up and scratched and such since it's been used for more than a decade.

I've always imagined it to be dark colored, like black or a very dark brown. It's also probably got a leather base since there's not a ton of material bug had access to in her village :(( the leather part probably is against her skin with a layer of hopefully softer cloth that will be against her face so that it doesn't agitate what's underneath.

I also always imagined it to have a tougher shell as an exterior that's scratched and scuffed up, but it sort of acts as armor in a way. after what happened she wanted another layer of protection between that side of her face and the outside world, so the outer layer of her mask is a little tougher, but I can't necessarily say what kind of material since I'm not too sure what she would have access too (I'll have to do a little more research!

it's pretty tightly pressed to her face, because when her tear duct ruptures, the blood pools at the bottom of the mask as it tries to slip between the crack and out of the material ( kind of gruesome I apologize :( ) she often has to replace that inner layer of cloth when it gets soaked with that blood since she doesn't want anymore infections, but she does it in privacy far away from camp (I haven't yet talked about this in the story itself, but it will be coming soon -- in fifteen perhaps >:DD )

and no, the mask doesn't completely cover what she's concealing. I didn't draw them here ( I hide that layer so you couldn't see it quite yet) but her hair sort of obscures the rest of it so it's not easy to see.

[wosobronze]

not sure if you want to discuss this, so feel free not to post, but while i love the uptick in support for the women’s game, there are so many issues now especially with the newer fans and what the media is starting to focus on.

i’ve never been an arsenal supporter, so when the team photo came out and everyone was pointing out the lack of diversity in the team i thought it was perfectly valid, but the amount of fans (most of them new i’ve noticed) who refused to acknowledge that there was an issue was massive.

and also people starting to feel entitled to getting an interaction from players after matches and getting angry when they don’t get anything has become more prevalent. like this man on twitter was angry at chloe kelly for not interacting with his son after the derby, who not only grabbed at her but was also wearing a united shirt. the players only really owe you 90 min of football. anything else you get is an added bonus.

chelsea also won against paris FC in the UWCL recently and the only thing that people seem to be focusing on is the fact that their attendance was low, and ignored the great football that was played??? sure they should be getting more fans to come along and their promotion could use a lot of work, but since when should attendance overshadow the actual game itself?

i do however think it’s slightly unfair to criticise causal football fans for not having loyalty to one club bc they’re still getting to know the teams (arsenal and spurs is crazy tho). just my two cents i suppose.

i totally agree, i think the growth of the women’s game has come with such a mix of positives and negatives. it’s so great to see so many football fans now sporting women’s jerseys and going to the women’s games of the team they support. it also fills me with so much joy to see the attendance now in comparison to what it used to be and also seeing older men wearing the women’s jerseys as this is something that used to happen very little.

but i do think many people have become a bit entitled with it at times. i know the exact video ur talking about with the chloe kelly thing and i do think some fans treat games as a bit of a meet and greet sort of thing now. i have no issue at all with wanting to meet players (who doesn’t want to meet their fav player at the end of the day lol?!) but when ur at a match and u see fans getting up 10 mins before the end to head to the front it becomes a little annoying.

realistically, the players are there to play a match and that’s all they’re required to do. a majority of them love meeting fans and take so much time at the end of matches to sign things and take photos but getting annoyed when they can’t/don’t is really odd.

ofc casual football fans don’t have a requirement to choose a team if they simply just enjoying watching the game. i only found it odd as the person i saw comment that they supported arsenal, spurs & other clubs was a fanpage of a player so they’re clearly not just a causal fan if you get what i mean? i think it all comes down to a lot of people now just being fans of certain players rather than teams, which again is okay i just couldn’t comprehend supporting two rival teams lmao.

[starlightkun]

hiiii mel <3 i’m.. thinking of starting to write for nct.. mostly jaemin.. and i more or less have an idea for formatting but it’s been a really long time since i’ve had to do graphics for fic’s (like the banner and stuff!) and i was wondering if you had any tips for that? like where to find good pictures (solid backgrounds seem like the best choice for not clashing with the lettering, a problem i ran into unfortunately…) and also is there any particular place you get your fonts from? if you aren’t comfortable answering that (or any of this!) then that’s totally ok and feel free to just give general advice or ignore this completely :]

now i leave you with renjun… https://www.instagram.com/reel/C117-m9JGuo/?igsh=aXI1YmZ6M2YycHg1

hiii! under the cut!

so you've already got a good idea with using solid backgrounds for fic headers to make it easier for the text to show up! i source pretty much all my images from the groups/idols' official social medias. i just caution you not to take screenshots of say, instagram uploads, because this will degrade the quality of the image. either download it from twitter or wherehaveyou, or from an updates account like neocatharsis or wayvment here on tumblr! another word of caution: DO NOT DOWNLOAD TEASER IMAGES/PHOTOSHOOT IMAGES FROM CONTENT CREATORS WHO MAKE EDITS TO THE IMAGES, SUCH AS CHANGING THE COLORS, UN-WHITEWASHING, ETC., WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION. THAT IS THEFT FROM OTHER FANS. updates accounts like neocatharsis and wayvment simply reupload the original images posted by the entertainment company/idol in the exact same form without making changes to them. editors make alterations to the image and that new image is their own creative work, separate from the original one posted. you need the editor's explicit permission in order to use their edited version as a fic header.

i do all of my editing on my phone for my fics (except for the thin section dividers that i use, which i make in pirated photoshop cs6 so i can get specific dimensions, 540x2 pixels, and make the gradients super quick in a way that i know how to do. there may be a super easy way to do this w an app on ur phone too, that's just how i know how to)

anyway, if i have a photo that i really like, that i just knowwwww matches with the image of the guy in the fic in my head or smth, that i just rlly want to use but has a busier background, sometimes i'll use the portrait editing settings on my phone to blur the background a little bit and that makes the text a lot more legible (i have a samsung but im 99% sure iphones can do this too)

i typically don't bump it past 1 or 2, or the edges of the blur start looking a bit harsh, and i find that i don't really need more than this for the text to pop against the background anyway!

as for putting the text on the photos, i've the used the app phonto for years! it's completely free, doesn't put any watermark on your photos, comes with a bunch of fonts pre-installed, isn't super ad-heavy (it has a rlly small banner ad all the time at the top, and only shows u a skippable 10s ad when u save a finished photo), and you can download fonts from the internet to install straight into the app!

my favorite free font website is dafont.com, i literally will spend hours just browsing on there looking at fonts to download lmao. anyway here's how i find fonts for stuff and download, install, and use them with dafont and phonto:

once you have phonto downloaded, open dafont.com

up at the top, it has a bunch of different categories of fonts. for this example, i chose fancy > groovy, and then on this first page, i liked this font called "lostar" (there's also a search bar up there, but it only searches font names, not kinds of fonts, so if you're looking for a groovy-feeling font and you searched "groovy," only fonts with the word "groovy" in the name would come up)

i then press download, and open in my browser (i use firefox btw, which is why it looks like this lol). make sure you're opening the .zip file with the phonto app (it opens directly into into phonto on my phone, you may have to choose to open the .zip file using the phonto app from several options, instead of your phone's file explorer or some other app on your phone)

in the phonto app, you have to click install, then install again (it gives you the option to rename it, but i just keep the original font name bc why would you rename it?).

that READ THIS.txt file is a message from the font maker, it's the personal use license for the font (most of the fonts on dafont.com are free for personal use ONLY, and these .txt files that are contained in the .zip files are notes from the font makers telling u what u can and can't use the fonts for. generally, as long as ur not a business, u should be good this is not legal advice, please read them. also there's usually little thank you notes from the font makers in here as well!)

click ok.

then you've got to slap some text on an image. you can choose an image from your camera roll, use one of their plain images, or open a pre-saved work-in-progress. for this example i used one of their premade gradients to make it easy

type whatever it is you want, click font. the left tab is the pre-installed fonts, the middle tab is the fonts that you've downloaded from elsewhere. here's the lostar we just got!

oh can't see it.

there we go! how fun! i'll probably use this in a fic header in the future. download button in the top right.

[k-quenouille]

ROTTMNT Theory

I spent a few hours researching this.....

Where the turtles might have been from based on their species (and the information I’ve conveniently forgotten about)

Leo: Red-eared slider, comes from Hamilton Lake, Hardin Precinct, Illinois, USA (at first i thought he could come from Kintown Hollow RD.... i did not know RD meant road lmao) (HE’S AN INVASIVE SPECIES, SO IN CHARACTER IDK Y)

Raph: Alligator Snapping turtle, comes from Godar Swamp, Calhoun County, Illinois, USA (close to both Illinois River and Hamilton Lake, while simultaneously having a gap big enough so that both species of turtles don’t meet each other)

Donnie: Spiny Softshell turtle (Apalone), comes from Lac Trois-Lacs, Asbestos, Québec, CA (Asbestos is now known under the name of Val-Des-Sources) (A while back i read something about Apalone turtles (endegered species) living there, apparently not anymore, but i would assume that 14-15 years ago, some Spiny Softshell turtle would still live around there)

Mikey: Ornate Turtle, come from Tazewell County, Illinois, USA (close to the river, there’s like, a forest, idk how it’s called) (I did make more research about other types of box turtles, i will share two of them cuz i found it funny; had he been a Three-Toed Box turtle, he would’ve came from Grassy Pond, Géorgie, USA, just north of the Florida Panhandle) (had he been a Yucatán box turtle, he would have came from the Reserva de la Biosfera Ría Celestún, Yucatán, MX.) (Box turtles are known to have reproduced with their cousins box turtles, so Mikey could have been a mix of Three-Toed and Yucatán Box turtles, as the Yucatán Box Turtle seem to have similar markings as mikey but are too pale in comparison with him) (do go look at Grassy Pond on google maps, there’s one dude’s photos whom are both hilarious and nightmare fuel)

Development (and added details)

WHICH MEANS, Leo, Raph and Mikey were shipped together, while Donnie was shipped alone to Draxum (i just imagine little turtles in like, Amazon boxes being dropkicked in a random place for Draxum to get them-), BUT each turtle could’ve come from a breeder, but i feel like the person taking care of them would live close to one of their natural habitat. For example, Leo, Raph and Mikey’s breeder would live in Henry (Illinois, USA) which is both close and far from their original spot and Donnie’s breeder would live in Saint-Hyacinthe (Québec, CA) (For three-toed Mikey’s breeder, they would live in Navarre, Florida, USA and for Yucatán Mikey, they would live in Yaxché de Peón, Yucatán, MX) OR MAYBE draxum walked all the way to their natural habitat and stole some babies???

Guys, gals and beach balls, I also made some more research about spiny softshell turtles, they do also live in Illinois.... I think the teenage mutant ninja turtles are illinoisan oh nooooo, i mean, i will keep the headcanon of Asbestos cuz idk, i like that there’s different places, but yes, actually there’s a lot of spiny softshell turtles living in Illinois.

What about the twinsies??

Now now, Donnie and Leo do seem to be twins in ROTTMNT, and what better way to bond than knowing each other since birth. I mean, red-eared sliders are an invasive species (as mentioned earlier) so it is very likely that some can be found in the same perimeter as Donnie, so yeah, their breeder could be the same person. There was some sightings of red-eared sliders in southern Ontario, according to google maps, the itinerary from Saint-Hyacinthe to southern Ontario is like, six hours, which is honestly not bad. With some more research, the Otonabee River (Peterborough County, Ontario, CA) doesn’t seem like that bad of a place, though might be a bit cold for a red-eared slider.

btw this is just research i made randomly, my sources are literally google maps and wikipedia, idk how reliable that is-

------

SOURCES:

https://herpetology.inhs.illinois.edu/species-lists/ilspecies/ornate-box-turtle/ « Ornate Box Turtle. Illinois Natural History Survey Herpetology Collection »

https://canadianherpetology.ca/species/species_page.html?cname=Spiny%20Softshell « Spiny Softshell. Canadian Herpetological Society »

https://en.unesco.org/biosphere/lac/ria-celestun « Ria Celestún Biosphere Reserve, Mexico. UNESCO »

https://www.anyplaceamerica.com/directory/swamps/il/ « Top Swamps in Illinois. AnyplaceAmerica.com »

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spiny_softshell_turtle « Spiny Softshell Turtle. Wikipedia »

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alligator_snapping_turtle « Alligator Snapping Turtle. Wikipedia »

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider « Red-Eared Slider. Wikipedia »

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common_box_turtle « Common Box Turtle. Wikipedia »

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ornate_box_turtle « Ornate Box Turtle. Wikipedia »

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yucat%C3%A1n_box_turtle «  Yucatán Box Turtle. Wikipedia »

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three-toed_box_turtle « Three-Toed Box Turtle. Wikipedia »

https://dnr.illinois.gov/education/wildaboutpages/wildaboutturtles/watspinysoftshell.html#:~:text=The%20spiny%20softshell%20turtle%20may,It%20basks%20on%20sand%20bars. « Spiny Softshell. Illinois department of Natural Resources  »

[bilbao-song]

hi it's jeffrey anon returning from my hiatus once again (apologies for adding to your mountain of messages in advance adhdgf), i just wanted to ask if you heard about jeffrey getting inducted into the songwriters hall of fame yesterday?? im so proud of him and so happy he's getting more recognition for his work. it's always exciting hearing news about him bc of his habit of just dropping music and disappearing every few years lol

hello!!!!!! i’ve missed you 🦐

anyway YES i’m very happy for our mutual Boy. :’) very very well deserved and in general it’s just always a pleasure to see him(!!!), especially since it’s been 91 years (close approximation). i hope we will be seeing more of him soon!!! i’ve seen basically all the photos from the event but i haven’t had a chance to listen to the videos w audio yet lmao. soon tho because i desperately need that serotonin

on the other hand!!! not to turn this into a negative lmao but! holy shit some people have been so obnoxious about all of this!!!!!!! i’ve been spying on everyone via my fake facebook account (and general lurking elsewhere) and people are like……..overanalyzing his appearance to a truly bizarre extent lmao. like. he looks more or less the same as he has for like ten years and some of these ppl are freaking out as if they truly believe that something is wrong with him and idk i just find it a bit oddly condescending and presumptuous? like, a) i know a guy who’s like 92 and looks as if a strong gust of wind would end him who’s out living a very full and exciting life, so how about we stop trying to baselessly diagnose a reasonably healthy looking 75 yr old with random ailments based on a slightly subpar set of photos in which he’s just not smiling like a cartoon character. and b) don’t u think he’s like, an intelligent person who’s aware of what goes on within his own life. like fellas if he was doing that badly do u really think they would have hauled him to new york city just for like, torture purposes. he’s obviously perfectly cognizant so the wildly displaced concern some of these people are rambling about at length seems borderline insulting. idk

idk this feels like a mass hallucination or something. like, i have no secret special intel obviously but i DO spend a somewhat embarrassing amount of time looking at him and he looks and generally seems perfectly normal to me lmfao. OH WELL i’ll just add this shitshow to my long list of community grievances <3

[10dance]

Real 10 Dance 2022 Review!

The remote version of Real 10 Dance this year was streamed on 6/25 at 8pm JST and was available for playback for 72 hours. This was my first time attending the event, so you know I had to go back and take so many screenshots >:). Unfortunately most of them came out pretty blurry, but you can find much higher quality pictures from the Real 10 Dance twitter, Odori Biyori twitter, or Nishio Kouichi’s blogposts (first half | second half). (If you’d like to see, I also posted all of my pictures here on Imgur, some of which will be in this post.)

The stream is long gone now, but they sent a behind the scenes video for audience members who added tips to the staff, dancers, or Inoue. Here is the link (password: dancethanks) if you would like to see parts of their performances. I keep reliving the experience by rewatching this...

The first few sections were a lot of talking which I did not understand, but sailorspazz wrote up a very detailed report for that too :), please go read it for an accurate account of the event. As for me, I’ll skip right to the manga discussion and dance sequences under the cut lol.

Our panel of dance (and manga) experts come into frame and introduce themselves (left to right: Takashima Kiyomi, Motoike Jun, Shimoda Ai, Kajiya Takashi). I liked how Motoike-sensei hid his face behind the catalogue from the 2019 exhibition lol. He was my favorite part of the segment since he was sometimes just flipping through the pages while the others talked about something else haha. 

The first section was the dancers picking out a dance scene they liked from the manga and discussed the characters’ postures as well as the atmosphere of the dances that were portrayed (ex. the waltz from chapter 4, the God of Dance in chapter 25 etc.). The second section was almost entirely them breaking down all the things that make Suzuki’s face great (and praising Inoue’s art in general lol). Motoike-sensei even went as far as recreating a Suzuki panel on the whiteboard, which I imagine was very hard to do. They had to clarify that he definitely doesn’t draw under the Inouesatoh pen name lol. 

(This pictures cracks me up no matter how many times I’ve seen it)

Then comes the main dances! I’ll include 2-3 photos of every number (incl. links to the music) and give short comments for each. (Again, there are way nicer pictures in the links mentioned above but I’m partly writing this for me to recollect my thoughts so bear with me :P)

Masquerade (Khachaturian) - Viennese Waltz (Shimoda Ai, Murano Miri, Seuchi Hideyuki, Masuda Daisuke, Sekine Choma, Takagi Takashi, Motoike Jun, and Nishio Kouichi)

I loved that we got to see a female dance pair!! The way their dresses spun was so pretty, and when the rest of the group joined in, it really felt like a masquerade dance. This piece was very important in the 10 Dance plot, I’m glad that I could see people dancing to it (nothing came up on Youtube when I searched for it lmao).

Butter (BTS) - Cha Cha Cha (Kajiya Takashi and Katsube Kou)

This is probably the first time I listened to Butter in full, and now it’s kind of stuck in my head... The dance was really upbeat, I especially liked the part where they kept spinning, they just kept going..! The pair looked liked they were having a lot of fun lol.

Calmi Cuori Appassionati - Rumba and Samba (Sekine Choma and Takagi Takashi)

This was one of my favorite dances! It told such a dramatic love story and I kept rewatching it (and the BTS version) over and over again. As sailorspazz already mentioned, the shorter dancer (Sekine Choma) got to lead during the dance as well which is a bit uncommon even in same-sex dancing, so that was really cool. I had to add this third hilarious photo in as well, it’s so good that I’ve made a meme using it lmao (more HQ pictures from this dance).

All That Jazz (“Chicago” musical) - Slow Jive (Kamiwaki Yukiko, Saiki Tomoko, Shizumu Ai, Numata Manami, Takashima Kiyomi, and Tsukada Mami)

Ladies’ number B)! I saw the pictures soon after the in-person event was held in April; I quote retweeted it with “Women 👀” and got a like from one of the dancers... That wasn’t relevant, but anyway, I loved watching this dance!

Romeo and Juliet (Nino Rota) - Waltz (Nishio Kouichi and Motoike Jun)

Uh oh, time to bawl my eyes out again... This was obviously going to be my favorite dance of the event; it’s got the drama, the angst, and them wearing tuxedoes just makes the Honor Dance headcanon that much more real, how could I not cry?! Both dancers are similar in body type, so I’m really looking forward to using these pictures as reference for a certain fandom day coming up in a few months 👀...

Up All Night (Charlie Puth) - Rumba (Seuchi Hideyuki and Masuda Daisuke)

This is another song they managed to get stuck in my head lol. It’s such a sweet rumba (compared to the angsty one before) and it really felt like the dance moves and expressions matched the lyrics! The hand hold at the end is adorable too...

It’s Time To Dance (“The Prom” musical)

Allow me to indulge in spamming pictures from this finale, there were simply too many cute moments! I’m pretty sure Nishio-sensei and Motoike-sensei have paired up in past events as well, and they got to strike three different poses in this dance (not including them fixing each other’s collars because AWW THAT’S SO CUTE WTF). All in all, this was a great experience for those who couldn’t attend in-person, I hope they keep doing it every year for us overseas fans as well!

[playitagainmyjohnny]

thinking about how when i first played far cry 5 i was so excited for a photo mode but then when i tried it for the first time i was just .  ugh .   idk i had no idea what i was doing lol and i almost gave up on really ever trying right then and there .  i don’t think i took many pictures my first time through .  and then i played it more and got to know what i was doing and well .  here we are .  according to steam i have over 10k pictures lmao ( though tbf a bit of those are from cut scenes and stuff but still ! ) . i finally started another ng+ file and it’s been nice playing from the beginning again, and taking new pictures after taking a few months away from the game for a break and to play other things .  i just recently discovered that fc5 is default set to a field of view of 75 so i’ve swapped it up to 100 and now all my pictures are default at that same fov too ( since the game pulls from your playing fov for photo mode’s fov as well ) so i’m excited for that small change .  i wonder if i’ll notice anything different in my shots or not ( or if anyone else will for that matter lol ) . i haven’t really yet, but it’s only been a few days .   anywho, that’s all i suppose !   thanks if you read this and also thank you to everyone who leaves kind words in my tags and stuff .  i feel like i say that a lot but they really do mean so much to me .  whenever i’m feeling down, they do a lot to cheer me up .  and every time i post a set i’m more unsure of than normal it always seems to end up with some very sweet words added in the tags which does so so much to dissuade my worries 🖤 🖤 🖤

[ko2vo]

6 weeks post top surgery hooray

Physically healing has been super smooth. Emotionally, it’s been tolling. So below the read more, I’m gonna post some progress photos and kinda just vent about what healing has been like week by week. I’m hoping this will be informative to anyone researching top surgery and looking at personal accounts.

Overall, the ultimate end to this post is that I am really happy I finally got top surgery. I wish I had done it sooner, I have never been this comfortable existing day to day before. Healing is emotionally draining though and that doesn’t negate from my happiness with the end result.

Pre-op

Hopefully this doesn’t cause this post to get flagged lmao. Anyhow, this is my pasty ass going into surgery. My chest was probably like a B cup; it’s been over a decade since I’ve worn bras so that’s an estimate. I’ve been on testosterone for almost five years so I have some hair that admittedly I didn’t think about in terms of how that might complicate healing. More on that later.

Dysphoria: bad. Since age 15, I’ve been binding. Began with layering sports bras before going to compression vests (a brief period of being tempted by ace bandages but thankfully, advocacy was already being spread online about the permanent damage involved with unsafe binding). I avoided going places because I was super conscious of my chest, how it looked under my shirt, and just generally felt my breathing limited by binders so going out was tiring. Going on T helped a lot. By a year and a half, I was passing like 80% of the time. Still, chest surgery was always part of my transition goals.

SO IT HAPPENS

Double mastectomy with free nipple grafts on May 18th, 2022. My surgeon has 30 years of experience and the procedure only lasted about an hour, which was wild when most of the quotes I was seeing on line for how long it takes was 4-5 hours.

One week post-op:

For the first week, I couldn’t do much at all. I was wrapped up in bandages, suture tape, and a compression vest (that I eventually added some makeshift straps to with safety pins and fabric strips because it kept feeling like it was sliding down and tugging). My partner did a lot of cooking and picking things up for me and helping me change clothes because moving at all was both painful and exhausting. Being in pain and suddenly so dependent made me sad and irritable and it kinda just got worse over the week.

My nipples were just scabs at this point lmao. Honestly terrifying. My skin still had the blue marks from when the surgeon drew where he’d be making incisions. Bruising up to the armpits. My suture tape was removed at the end of the first week and oh my god, I almost passed out. The adhesive really glued to my skin and the tugging of getting it off wasn’t exactly painful because my chest was numb in a lot of places, but it was incredibly uncomfortable and my body’s reaction to the feeling was nausea and vertigo.

Two weeks post-op:

In healing terms, things were already looking a lot better. Nipples still black, bruising still there, but everything was going smooth. However, this was my worst week emotionally. My partner went back home and I was able to do more things on my own but I was super slow. Everything ached still. I was crying a lot out of frustration and, in a lot of ways, guilt. You kinda get into the headspace that this is one of the best things you can do for yourself as a trans person with chest dysphoria and that you should be happy about it no matter what. So non-LGBT people in my life would be asking how I was feeling, how healing was going, and I’d just go for the middle-ground “I’m tired” answer.

The second week after getting a major surgery really isn’t when you are gonna experience any sort of elation. Your body’s energy is being redirected to healing and things are still super sore. I had stopped taking my painkillers during the first week and mostly managed my pain through Advil.

Additionally, this was the first week I could shower as well. Feeling oily and sticky and sweaty takes another toll on your mental state. My first shower was actually just me sitting on the floor of my shower and scooping water from the tap onto me, I was terrified of fucking up my healing and barely able to move without pain anyways hah.

Three weeks post-op:

Looking better and better, even while my mental health was struggling. Part of that was also just being stuck at home and on medical leave, in addition to my prior emotional rockiness. This was the week I began to resume my remote job though, which helped stabilize me a little more with productive things to focus on. I did however realize that some of my chest hair had become ingrown, which was an unexpected development, so keep that in mind if you’ve been on T for as long as I have prior to getting top surgery.

I began scar care this week as well.

Four weeks post-op:

Oh, looking WAY better. I started back up at my physical workplace this week too. Incredibly tiring. At this point, I was allowed to lift up to 20lbs but I was still wearing my compression vest to protect my nipples lmao. That being said, my physical job is at a bookstore, moving books around. Accommodations were put in place but the first day back after having so many weeks off was exhausting. There’s a combination of the body is still healing as well as having not worked for a handful of weeks before surgery, which caused a big plummet in energy with even the smallest amount of exertion.

Mood wise, this week was a little better than the last week. I experienced my first real sense of excitement for the future, imagining what I would be able to do now that I wasn’t being weighed down by this part of my body that had always prevented me from doing everything I wanted to do. Still, that would contrast again my general emotional vulnerability. I was emotionally raw and on edge. I had also been watching too much political commentary and feeling a little Doomy with the current state of trans rights lmao (among other things)

Five weeks post-op:

Not a ton of difference but continuing to heal. Emotionally starting to stabilize, part of that being a return to routine and being able to do more and more physically. At this point, I didn’t have to wear my compression vest anymore, which was also wonderful. Officially binder free after 11 years of near daily binding.

I also! Began to wear clothes that weren’t just easy to get in and out of button downs and zip-ups and that felt good. Still avoiding lifting arms over my head so I don’t stretch my scars but having more range of motion and trying on clothing I had been avoiding because of how it felt wrong against my body was really exciting.

Six weeks post-op:

Six weeks post operation is the big milestone for top surgery. At this point, you generally don’t have any limitations on how much you can lift or activities you can do if the healing has gone smoothly. And my healing has been very smooth. My nipples are basically healed at this point with just minimal scabbing, I don’t have anymore pain either. My chest feels numb still and there are moments where I have twinges of pain but overall it all feels good.

Emotionally, I’m feeling incredibly good. Once again, I’m looking forward to the future; I feel like a weight holding me back has been removed and I can finally push forward. I’m thinking about finally continuing education and getting my Masters degree, I’m thinking about looking for a better job, I’m excited to go out and get involved in my community and volunteer and talk to people again. It’s very surreal for me, feeling this passive hopefulness.

So that’s where I’m at now. Still avoiding lifting my arms over my head to keep my scars from stretching much but this has been the beginning of my own white boy summer. Thank you if you read this far, I hope it was an interesting or informative read.

[ghirahims-trophyhusband]

1, 4 and 10 with grigori and/or behemoth? :3c

COMFORT CHARACTER ASK MEME

1. How long have you known about them? - I’ve known about Grigori since 2020 thanks to one of my Monster Hunter youtubers: Gaijin-Hunter, posting a video and a tweet about the game :>

Behemoths are a bit more vague as I’ve known about them for MUCH longer so I can’t pinpoint which FF game introduced me to them properly, but as FFXIII was my first FF game, I can at least share photos of how the behemoths appear in that game!

I didn’t get far enough into the game to see the more natural and non-robotic behemoths at the time, but they’re still so pretty and cool I love them!!!

Also! In FFXIII it is one of the few games where the behemoths stand up their back legs when their health is low enough and use their ‘horns’ as weapons!

4. What about their personality I like - GRIGORI IS SO COOL AND I LOVE HEARING HIM TALK he has so many fantastic quotes and his manner of speaking fits so well into the world of Dragon’s Dogma bc of how he talks and how he acts as a character. I love every aspect of him and that whilst the archaic manner people speak in may seem a little forced sometimes, like I’m watching a LARP session lmao, Grigori never feels that way because his character is just so engaging. Every time he’s onscreen I am mesmerized by him. I love putting on his cutscenes in the background because of how much I love how he talks and even if he does speak in a calm tone and never raises his voice, there is still character to his words.

Eg. When he speaks to The Arisen during the Deny Salvation cutscene and he says the line ‘Only my death will stanch the flood of destruction’, he clearly pauses to laugh after the word ‘death’, fully knowing the Arisen does not have the strength, be it physical or emotional, to face him yet, so he will gladly goad the Arisen into fighting him if he must and hey! It works! If I was told by a big dragon I’m a weak bitch I too would want to prove him wrong.

Ad for behemoths: they don’t really have personalities lmao. They’re just animals. Big mean angry animals. But they are also big dogs who are my friends and brothers in arms 💖💖💖 They have big teeth, big muscles, big claws, and a big heart :>

10. My favourite moment with them in canon - Literally every scene with Grigori in it honestly ghfkdg. Even his boss fight is a fantastic moment with how it goes from you running from Grigori, only being able to attack him when he’s trapped in a tunnel and when you are on his back at a point in the fight, to you fighting him on equal ground within a large arena. Plus, as mentioned prior about the ‘death’ comment, Grigori’s few moments of snark are very fun to see. I still love the obvious smile and laugh in his voice (which is in a very ‘are you kidding me lmao’ sort of tone) when you try to leave the starting room without choosing a vocation (eg. Warrior, archer, rogue, mage) and he says ‘Take up arms, Arisen! For my kind do not heed the toothless.’

Just like Grigori, any moment with a behemoth, be it a cutscene or boss fight, is my favourite moment with them! I really couldn’t pinpoint a favourite moment because I love them all, but to at least provide an answer of some kind, the moment when you get Behemonster in World of Final Fantasy. An absolute unit and total chad.

Also please god, look at this little baby man. This is an ACTUAL behemoth pup btw, as they appear in FFXIV and the crossover mission with Monster Hunter World (you can get a costume for your poogie :>)! You can also get this little man as a plush I NEED HIM I will feed him steaks and whipped cream 💖

[dinednwined]

January 2023 • All winter I’ve been craving a nice cup of hot chocolate. Not sure why I’m barely getting around to it after the holidays. As I’ve mentioned I’m not big into sweets since they mess up my stomach but I figure a cup of cocoa calls for some other sweet treats. Threw some butter on the banana bread I made the other day. The butter purely because I saw photos with butter included on banana bread slices in recipes lmao! I’d say it adds another dimension, worth a try. Then we got some ginger snap cookies that have been sitting in my pantry for way too long. Third we have some butter cookies that were gifted from my aunt and uncle. And lastly I added some reishi mushroom powder to the Swiss miss cocoa mix and I think I like the reishi powder more than the hot chocolate haha! Yummy treats worth an achey stomach once in awhile!

[harmonytheme]

Could you explain your drawing process? I'm a new artist and I love your style 💛 I'd love to know how you achieve it

Absolutely! I did a little tutorial for you anon, so have a look below the cut and I’ll walk you through how I did this rough little sketch.

first off, i browse my very cheap set of coloured pencils and choose what i’m feeling for that day. these are two weeks old and it’s very obvious which are my favourites haha. i also look for a reference photo!

I chose a cute little turquoise colour for this, one that doesn’t show up on camera very well, and one which I later found out doesn’t erase very well. my reference is a very cute old pic of omar. i already decided here that i couldn’t be bothered drawing his hand lmao.

so, when it comes to guide lines, I tend not to use them when I’m doing side on profile shots, I’m not sure why, I think I’ve just been drawing so long that I don’t really need them anymore? but for this angle, I will use them, just to ensure I have the proportions correct for the angle and so that things line up right.

my guide lines, like my art lol, are definitely in my style. I wasn’t classically trained, but my mother was an artist, and so I’ve used a mixture of her teachings as well as my own research since then. I usually work out the rough shape of the face, centre line, the rough size and position of the nose, then to measure out the distance between eyes and eyebrows. this can all be messy, and as long as you’re using something erasable, you have plenty of freedom to change as you go.

here I am next working out the jaw shape and defining the nose. as you can see with the mouth, it lines up better with the centre of the nose than the guideline I’ve set out, and that’s fine. it looks better that way.

erasing guidelines, defining features.

now here i am adding my daisy-ism’s in. these are the highlights/lowlights I add to almost every picture, even if the refefence does not have it. shadowing under the nose and mouth, a highlight in the brow, the tip of the nose and the chin.

hair time! as you can see, in my reference, he doesn’t have a visible bun, but I think it looks way cuter and more complete this way. I’m just doing a basic hair outline here, working out the shapes and flow, then putting in his lil sunglasses.

shading time! my shading is pretty stylised, but the gist of it is, looking at the reference photo, laying in some cross hatching for the heaviest areas, and making sure the highlights are left unshaded. I use my coloured pencils for shadow AND warmth, which is why I like to have heavily shaded noses and chins in my art. 😌 this also extends to knuckles, fingertips and ears. also shoulders, elbows and knees if those are exposed.

then I shade the hair and add in my final details. so, my little lower eyelashes that I always do, my signature and whatever else I want to add. in this I just gave him a lil heart earring and coloured his sunglasses pink for this.

when it comes to hair, my advice is for you to fake it ‘til you make it. hair is hard, really hard, but my best tips are to section it out and shade each section individually. pay attention to your reference photo and where the highlights and lowlights lay. you don’t need to draw every strand! the inference of hair is always more effective than every single strand drawn out one by one. also, its okay if the final result doesn’t look exactly like the reference. mine never do either! it’s impossible to get everything right, but the important part is having fun and enjoying the process.

and here is the final result! i limited my time on this one as i’m super busy today - usually i would refine it a lot more and spend a tonne of time making sure the shading is smooth, but you get the point, and that’s the important thing. i hope that helps, and if you have any questions, please feel free to send me an ask, or dm me any time! i’d love to help you on your art journey. ♥

[havethetimeofyourstyles]

in which you and harry meet again after six months.

a/n: hiiii! this is for @theharriediaries fic challenge! the photo used is the one on the left of the banner, and the dialogue i chose was ‘Is this seat taken?’ ‘By you, I hope.’ & ‘I’m sorry it took us this long.’ thank you for creating this challenge, soph!

thank you @sunflowers-styles for beta reading this for me, mwah! <3

WORD COUNT: 12k of dad!harry with slight angst and fluff (pls appreciate the dilfrry dialogues in this lmao)

COME INTO MY INBOX AND LETS TALK ABOUT ‘THE TRAIN RIDE BACK TO US’ I’d love to know your thoughts!

pls rb to share! <3

The gold bell chimed quite loudly, informing the baristas that someone had entered their shop. The aroma of fresh ground coffee beans immediately filled your senses once you pushed open the sage green door as the smell feeling of nostalgia and comforted you. 

Everything looked the same in the coffee shop. The oak wood floor never changed with coffee stains in certain areas that didn’t quite seem to come off all the way, no matter how hard the employees scrubbed—but it gave the shop character, in your opinion. Different colored potted plants filled the shop in every corner and on the clean white windowsill, making the place look lively. Crisp oxygen mixed with Columbian coffee beans flowed around the shop, making customers want to come back to a comfortable environment. Black and white bistro tables sat within the café, with silver metal bases, holding the circular table tops up as they alternated with colors along the built-in brown bench against the light-gray colored wall; with matching black and white metal chairs that practically screeched against the oak wood floors when someone was trying to scoot in or out of the table. 

The entire shop was the exact same from what you remembered it to be six months ago. The only difference was that when you sat on the wooden bench, specifically at the black table in the corner that was right next to the window, the person who was supposed to be in front of you wouldn’t be there; and for that, your heart dropped a little. 

Trying not to think too much about your change of mood, you ordered your usual—an iced mocha latte with a pump of sweet vanilla syrup—before you paid and turned around to see which tables were available. The usual corner table was staring right at you, practically mocking you, and you wished that the table was occupied, but then you would’ve felt wrong sitting at a different table when yours was clearly open. 

You took your seat on the bench, and almost immediately, you started shaking your leg underneath the table. Your seat felt hot, as if the wood was catching fire underneath you, burning your legs and making you antsy. 

Luckily, the shop wasn’t crowded so it took the baristas less than six minutes to make your drink and to call out your name from behind the counter. Quickly, standing up from the burning hot seat, you made your way to the counter, thanking Mel for the drink. Since coming here, you had become quite a constant in the cute Portland coffee shop. Mel was one of the employees that had worked at the shop the longest, so she made everyone’s drinks because she knew the menu the best. So, you caught up with her a bit, and inevitably, she asked where you had been. 

“You didn’t find a better coffee shop did you?” She teased, making you chuckle. 

“No, I’ve just been, uh, too busy to come around. But I promise, your drinks and shop are still the best,” you said truthfully, to which she beamed. To this day, you hadn’t found a superior coffee shop than ‘Coava’ because the others just didn’t compare—they didn’t make you feel the same way you did with this one. “But thanks for the coffee.” You gave her one last smile before you turned around to make your way back to your table. 

And then the bell chimed. 

It was as if the sun was peeking out through the clouds; the sun beams strongly pointed down onto the wet pavement after a night of rain, leaving the air with its pleasant smell of petrichor. He was the light that seeped through the curtains, and you knew it was going to be a lovely day. 

“Harry…” you stopped in your tracks, careful not to spill the contents of your coffee cup. Your heart skipped several beats once he flashed you his gorgeous smile that you were still hopelessly in love with. 

“Hi, Y/N.” Harry mindlessly played with the buttons of his coat as he mentally tried to situate the nerves in his head and stomach. His breath felt like it was stuck in his throat, making his voice slightly trail off with a crack to the tone. 

It felt like the two of you were the only ones in the coffee shop—minus the locals who were sitting at the tables, minding their own business, or wondering what the fuck they were doing standing in the middle of the shop—completely and fully captured by the other’s stare and presence. 

The loud screeching noise of steam took you out of your dazy trance as you cleared your throat. Harry looked down at his feet before looking up at you through his lashes, shyly intertwining his hands behind his back. 

“Uh, would you like to join me?” 

Harry raised his brows at your proposal, pursing his lips to contain his giddy excitement. “S-Sure.” You took a deep breath before you started to walk towards the table in the corner—one he was also very familiar with. “This seat...Is this seat taken?” He asked politely but, almost instantly, mentally cursed himself because you wouldn’t have invited him if you were with someone. 

You didn’t catch his slip up, instead, you smiled as your face grew warm. “By you, I hope.” Harry blushed, taking a seat on the black metal chair across from you. 

“So, how’ve you been? It’s been a while since I last saw you,” you mentioned. 

It’d been six months since the last time you saw and sat in front of Harry—a very long six months. The conversation six months ago wasn’t the most happiest of memories because that  conversation brought in the heartache and heartbreak; the chat had included the mutual separation of your relationship that involved tears, chest pain, and as always, the smell of Colombian coffee that surrounded your afflictive conversation, hoping it would calm the tension between you two. 

“Yeah, it has been a while, but I’m doing okay. How are you?” 

“I’m good.” There was a bit of awkwardness swirling in the air, and you absolutely despised it—you wanted it to leave the shop and never return. You had always imagined what it would be like bumping into Harry again, more importantly, what you would say to him. And despite all those moments daydreaming of finding the right words, you were completely stuck, and you fully blamed it on the awkward tension. “Can we not be…y’know, awkward? That’s not us,” you simply said. 

Harry let out a sigh of relief, adding a breathy laugh. “Yes, yes, of course. You’re right, that isn’t us at all.” Mel brought him an iced black coffee since it was his usual, and she saw that he didn’t get the chance to order because he was immediately occupied by the sight of you. He softly thanked her with a smile, only taking his attention off of you for a split second before his eyes were right back on you; he didn’t know what this conversation would lead to, nor did he want to get his hopes up, so that meant spending every moment with his complete attention and eyes averted to you. “I miss you…” he said. 

There was a sense of relief as you exhaled deeply, glad that he wasn’t the only one who was missing the other. His words had brought a flutter of butterflies to your stomach, soaring as they pleased while your face felt warm. 

You and Harry had been together for a year and a half before calling it quits. For most of the relationship, it was happiness and bliss—occasional fights, but they weren’t frequent—towards the last few months however, things were getting a bit stressful. You remembered the days like it was yesterday as the vivid memory crept inside of your head...

It was nearing nine in the evening and the house was quiet. The silence was louder than the ongoing noise inside your head that was constantly yelling at you, making your head ache from the incessant thoughts. It was safe to say that you weren’t happy, and that even Harry wasn’t happy either. But you had only gotten a glimpse of him during the evening, so you were simply assuming that he wasn’t content—but it was a very logical assumption since every time he looked at you, it seemed like he was becoming more stressed out by the minute; as if he didn’t already have a lot on his plate during the day, and by night, he would still have to deal with whatever argument and fight either of you would pick for no apparent reason. 

It started with petty little arguments, getting annoyed and frustrated at the other because of burnt toast or something as small as running out of detergent for the laundry. But fighting over nothing had turned into completely confessing that you weren’t happy anymore, and that the exhaustion had gotten to you. 

“I-I don’t know if I can do this anymore, Harry,” you said in between your sobs that you tried to contain. “All we’re doing is hurting each other—we’re not even happy together anymore!” 

It felt like his heart was exploding, but it was the truth. “Darling…” 

“You can’t lie and tell me that we’re happy together because it’s obvious that we’re not.” You wiped the tears from your face, leaving your skin damp from the moisture. 

Harry sighed deeply, knowing he couldn’t argue anymore. He felt defeated and upset with himself; it was like he was doing well in everything else or at least trying, and he couldn’t even do his part in being a good boyfriend to you. He knew part of the reason why both of you weren’t happy was because of the neglectance, and both of you were too exhausted to even communicate that feeling. You two were both independent entrepreneurs—always knowing when to close business and how to make a well deserved investment or sale with others who were trying to buy whatever stock or product. But when it came down to each other, to Y/N and Harry, it seemed like the individuals that were trying to please and charm others had dissipated, leaving no room or patience for each other. 

“We’re both busy, Harry, I get that. And maybe it’s best if we call it quits until everything settles down—until we both know what we want—”

“I want you,” he interrupted. 

You softly huffed, looking down at your lap as you slightly nodded before you looked up at him again. He had tears streaming down his face and more forming in his eyes; you loved that he wasn’t embarrassed or afraid to show his true emotions—he was being vulnerable every time he let his guard down, and for that, you would appreciate him forever. 

Muffled, static cracks followed by quiet little groans were heard from the baby monitor on the coffee table. Harry glanced at it before looking back at you, knowing he had to take care of his number one priority, and who were you to stop him? So, you nodded, tilting your head towards the room, and he sadly smiled before heading towards the nursery. 

You walked over to the kitchen counter, grabbed a pen and paper, and wrote ‘Meet me at Coava tomorrow. Usual time.’ before you placed it on the coffee table beside the monitor. As you were leaving, you heard soft humming coming from the baby monitor, and your heart squeezed, frowning as this was most likely going to be the last time you were going to be in this house. Taking one look around, you took in all of the memories that you made in the building that made you feel safe and warm before you stepped out, immediately welcomed by the cool temperatures of the evening. 

The next afternoon when you walked into Coava, Harry was already sitting at the usual table you two sat at. His head was down, mindlessly wiping down the condensation that formed outside of his glass. You took a seat in front of him without saying a word, making him look up. He had dark circles around eyes as he hadn’t gotten much sleep. 

“Hi,” you whispered. There was your usual cup of iced coffee placed in front of you. “Thank you for the coffee.” 

He nodded and smiled softly, despite his current mood. “Hello.” 

You took a deep breath. “So…where do we go from here?” 

Harry sadly looked at you with desperation in his eyes that spoke, no, begged you to tell him to stay, to tell him that you two could and would work this out. But it seemed like you hadn’t received that specific message from his green and sorrowful eyes. 

“You were right…We haven’t been able to make time for one another. So, we’ll just…take some time apart.” His heart and voice cracked at the end of his sentence, finding it hard to even form a sentence that didn’t absolutely break him. You nodded, agreeing, but it didn’t hurt any less; you knew this would be best for the two of you because both of you had to focus on yourselves, especially when Harry had his priorities, such as his family, which you weren’t going to make him change whatsoever. “Okay…so, we’re over.” He hadn’t said it as a question but rather a way to see that realization. 

You reached across the table, placing your hand on his, and you were lucky that he didn’t pull away. “Harry, this doesn’t mean that I don’t love you. I…will always love you.” 

“And I’ll always love you too,” he said honestly. 

Behind the civil and mature conversation that occurred, there was sadness and heartbreak. There were no more smiles or laughs, no more love and affection, or anymore meet-ups during lunch or coffee dates during breaks. The painful look on Harry’s face had only pained you even more, but you both knew this split-up and time apart was for the best. 

That was six months ago. 

Now, as you sat across Harry, you felt an overwhelming rush of relief and joy; he just looked happier and you saw a familiar glint in his eyes as he looked at you. It may not be the same sparkle of love as it once was, which you were afraid it wasn’t, but there was still some kind of sparkle—the kind someone would give when they reunite with an old friend. 

“The kids miss you—they miss you a lot.” 

Your eyes look at him fondly at the mention of his children. “Really?” 

“Yeah, they do. They said, and I quote, they miss their ‘pretty fairy second mom,’” Harry said quite proudly. 

Harry had three kids that you absolutely adored. There was Mira and Estelle, seven-year-old twins that looked like their father. Mira was very energetic and talkative—that little girl could talk for hours on end without missing a beat; Estelle was more quiet and reserved, but once you started hanging around, she opened up and was quite fun to have a laugh with. Then there was the sweet little two-year-old boy, Rory, who resembled his mother. He was always babbling and giggling, so happy and free. 

If Harry was being honest, Rory was a complete accident. Him and his ex had separated and broken up when the twins were four, but they were still seeing each other. Those occasional hangouts led to another child, which they both thought would help them bond, but six months into the pregnancy, they both knew it wasn’t right anymore—not like before. So, they stuck to coparenting and, if they were speaking the truth, it was much better than being together. 

When Rory was six months old, that was when Harry met you. On an unexpected literal run in the park when you and Harry were on your daily runs, the trail was only narrow and small enough for one person to run. So, when you and Harry were running towards each other, you braced yourself for the awkwardness you were about to face with the man. Harry politely smiled, moving to his left, only for you to move to your right, which made you both giggle. The two of you then moved to the opposite side, only to clash again. The thought was quite hilarious to the two of you, so you both started laughing, clutching your stomachs. Once you two calmed down, Harry then said that he was going to his left, so you moved to your left, running the opposite directions from each other. 

At the end of the trail and on your way to the parking lot, you saw Harry finish the same trail but exit from the other side. And if it said anything more, you parked right next to his car as well. Harry smiled, dimples flashing and asked you how your run was, which then led to a bit of small talk. In the six minutes you two were talking, Harry made the impulsive decision to ask you if you would like some coffee. He wouldn’t have asked if it were anyone else, and until that moment he didn’t even know  if he was ready to date again. But he took the chance and decided to ask you, and luckily, you said yes. 

The rest was history. 

“I miss them so much too.” You smiled softly, thinking about the kids that you had thought of as your own. 

“I, uh, I know it’s too much to ask, but I figured I should ask either way…Would you like to see them? Mira would never live it down if I told them that I saw you and didn’t ask if you wanted to see them.” He added a chuckle at the end, nerves creeping up his skin. 

Your eyes lit up. “Really? You’d let me see them?” 

Harry raised his brows. “Yeah, of course! You could see them anytime you want, if you’d like. Just because we’re not, y’know, together doesn’t mean that you can’t see them. I know how much you love them and how much they love you too,” he reassured. 

“Would Laurie be okay with that?” You asked about his ex and the mother of said children. 

He nodded. “Yeah, she would. I mean, she also knows how much they love you.” Harry was lucky that the mother of his children and his ex was so kind and chill with having someone that Harry loved be ‘another mother’ to her children; all Laurie really asked of you was to not try and replace her role as their mom and to always keep them safe when she wasn’t around, and who were you to disrespect her wishes? 

“Harry, I would love to, thank you. I really do miss them.” You felt yourself getting a bit emotional because of how much you missed the kids, and it’d felt like an eternity since you last saw them. 

“Great! Tomorrow is the weekend, so are you free to go to the park and maybe get some ice cream after?” 

“Yeah, that sounds like a plan.” You smiled, not too widely as you tried to contain your excitement. 

Harry smiled back at you before quickly looking at his phone to check the time. “I gotta get back. But I’ll see you tomorrow and will text you the details tonight.” 

“Okay, see you soon.” You stood up to hug him, and his arm immediately wrapped around your waist, hugging you to his chest. His stomach was doing flips as he felt your breath against the crook of his neck. He didn’t want the moment to end, and it was the most physical contact that you two had in six months. 

Pulling away, he offered you a smile before bidding you goodbye, and you finally let out the breath you had been holding the moment the bell chimed and the man you still loved walked in. 

A soft blush was planted on Harry’s cheeks for the entire day. He was driving from work to Laurie’s house to pick up his beloved children as he thought about how his day turned out to be. 

In all honesty, he hadn’t expected to see you in the coffee shop that you two had gone to throughout the entirety of your relationship. He had just gotten out of a meeting and was debating on going to Coava because he hadn’t been there since the day you two called it quits, but he figured it was time and thought that maybe reminiscing on the memories you two had with each other wasn’t a bad thing. So, he walked into that shop thinking he was just going to get a coffee to-go, but he had gone in there and left with something so much better. 

The moment his eyes landed on yours his mind had screamed and reassured him that he wasn’t just dreaming that you were standing right in front of him, he felt his stomach drop in the best way. The heat had rushed to his cheeks, tugging on the corners of his lips, urging his mouth to smile, and he did not hold back his joy when he saw you. You were beautiful, just like he remembered, but he had no doubt that there wasn’t a day that went by where you weren’t not absolutely stunning. 

And the giddy feeling he felt when he asked you if you’d like to see the kids made his heart tumble inside of his chest as he couldn’t wait for you and the kids to finally see each other again. 

Harry pulled into Laurie’s driveway, and he quickly got out and knocked on the door, waiting for Laurie to answer. He chuckled as he could practically hear the twins screaming from across the house to make sure they had everything they needed. When the door opened, he was met by his ex that he once loved, and still had some platonic love for her, naturally, as the mother of his children. 

“Hey, Harry! They’re just getting their stuff ready,” she greeted with a smile, opening the door wider as she walked away from the entrance and let him in. She grabbed Rory from the couch, who was mindlessly playing with a giant puzzle piece, and gave him many kisses to his cheeks before saying goodbye to her son and handing him off to Harry. 

Rory’s eyes lightened up at the sight of his father. “Dada!”

“Hi, my sweet boy. I’ve missed you.” He placed soft kisses to his chubby and squeezable cheeks. 

“Girls, dad’s waiting!” Laurie called out from the bottom of the stairway before turning back towards Harry. “Why do you look like that?” She gave him a knowing look. 

“Like what?” Harry asked, acting like he didn’t know what she was talking about. The blush really gave him away, he thought. 

“You’re just…extra happy today.” 

“Can’t I be happy, Laurie? To see my kids?” He teased, smirking as he hugged Rory to his chest. 

“I mean, sure, but…did something happen today?” 

His smile widened, and it was like he couldn’t contain the exciting feeling anymore and he just had to tell someone. “I saw Y/N today.” 

Her brows raised. “Really? How is she?” 

“She’s doing well, yeah. We talked for a little bit.” Was all that he told her. 

“And I’m assuming it went well.” He nodded, not wanting to tell her more. “Well, that’s great, Harry. She was, is, a lovely woman and she took care of the kids, so that’s all that matters to me,” Laurie said genuinely; she wasn’t jealous, if she was being honest. All that mattered to her was that her kids were in good hands. 

Suddenly more footsteps were coming down the stairs. “Dad!” The twins yelled at the same time. He put Rory down for a moment before he bent down to hug his two girls. 

“Hi, my loves. How are you?” He kissed both of their cheeks, making their small arms hug him tighter. 

“Dad, I scored one hundred percent on all my spelling tests, so I’m qualified for the spelling bee!” Mira explained excitedly once she let go of Harry. 

“Really?! That’s amazing, bug. This week, I’ll help you study for it.” Mira beamed at that before walking over to her mom to say bye. 

“How are you, my sunshine?” He directly asked Estelle, knowing that she was specifically waiting for Harry to have his attention on only her. Even though she’d never told him that, he could tell that sometimes Estelle lets Mira have her moment and wanted to speak with Harry when no one else was paying attention. 

“I’m good. My teacher told me I could become a math…mathmat—daddy, what are they called?” She looked at Harry for help. 

“Look at you, sunshine! I’m so proud of you my little mathematician.” Estelle’s eyes widened. “Is that you meant mathematician, sweetheart?” He smiled. 

“Yes, that! I did good on my math test and even baked cookies for you!” Before Harry could say anything, Estelle ran off to the kitchen to grab the plate of cookies she baked last night. 

“Alright, babies, let’s go. Say bye to mommy.” The kids said their goodbyes before Harry safely buckled them into their car seats and drove home for a week at their father’s. 

When all four of them reached the front door, Harry told the twins to put their belongings away and wash up for dinner. He set Rory down in his high chair before cutting up some bananas in halves, and placing them on the plastic table in front of him for his pre-dinner snack. Knowing that his kids liked home cooked meals better than takeout, fortunately, he set out the ingredients to make some fried rice, which was quick and easy. 

The twins rushed down the stairs once Harry put the leftover rice into the pan filled with sautéed veggies, and they settled onto the couch in front of the TV, waiting for dinner.

“Loves, set the table for me, please!” He called out from the kitchen as he transferred the rice from the pan to a large bowl, topping it with green onions. The girls each had a task for setting the table; Mira was in charge of forks and spoons, and Estelle handled the plates since she was less clums. He rolled Rory’s high chair over to the table, which he was so lucky to have gotten a high chair with wheels because it was so much easier to move him without carrying him and the chair; and he gave everyone an equal scoop, depending on how much they ate, and if they wanted seconds, he would be glad to serve them more. 

As they ate, Harry was occasionally helping Rory eat the rice, just picking up the contents that didn’t make it into his mouth, as Estelle and Mira both took turns talking. Harry loved family dinner, he tried his very best to give all three of his children the attention that they deserved, but dinner was the one time they bonded the most because no one felt competitive or had the urge to start an argument when there was food in front of them. 

“Daddy, how was your day?” Estelle asked curiously, and Harry smiled at his sunshine, as if she was the sun itself, heart swooning. 

“It was great, thanks for asking, my love.” He placed his spoon on his plate. “I actually wanted to talk to you all about something.” The twins didn’t respond, just stared at him, encouraging him to continue. “Do you remember Y/N?” Just at the sound of your name, the crowd went absolutely wild. 

“Y/N, yes!” Screamed Estelle, which was rare for her to raise her voice. 

“Pretty, fairy second mom, of course we remember her, dad!” Mira exclaimed obviously. 

“Fairy!” Rory had repeated the only word he could make out from Mira’s mouth as he fussed because of the volume that had increased from his sisters. 

Harry laughed. “Alright, okay, settle down. Well, I saw her today.” The twins gasped, making him chuckle. It genuinely felt like he was on a talk show with a live audience. “And I wanted to ask you all if you wanted to see her tomorrow? Figured we could go to the park and get some ice cream together?” He asked hesitantly, even though he knew they’d say yes, and he’d get another chance to see you again. 

“Yes!” The girls both answered. 

Harry beamed, turning to Rory. “Bubba, remember Y/N? Your slide friend? Remember you used to go on the slide with Y/N?” Rory giggled, a sound that was Harry’s weakness, and nodded. “Do you wanna see her tomorrow?” 

“Slide with fairy?” Rory asked, and Harry laughed. 

“Yes, slide with fairy,” he confirmed, and Rory nodded his head eagerly. 

Harry smiled, glad his kids were with the plans tomorrow. The rest of the dinner was filled with the twins talking about you; they talked about what you all could do together at the park and what they wanted to show you, and Harry would be lucky if they slept through the entire night without continuously waking up because of their excitement for the upcoming afternoon. 

Once everything was cleaned up and put away, the twins washed and cleaned, Harry give Rory a bath, and everyone was ready for bed, Harry said good night to his babies, spending about five minutes cuddling and talking them to sleep until they fluttered their eyes closed and off to slumber. 

Sighing, Harry closed his door, leaving the baby monitor from Rory’s room on his bedside table before he was able to unwind for the day. He always spent an extra amount of time on his skin care routine, figuring that he sometimes didn’t have time for himself and the only time he had was during nights. 

When he was ready for bed, he felt a huge amount of relief to be getting into bed after a long but grateful day, and he picked up his phone and clicked on your message thread. The last time you two texted was a few weeks after the breakup, asking if you were doing okay, and he could practically feel the awkward tension through the texts as he reread them. But he was glad that this time would be a much lighter and better conversation. 

Hi, Y/N. Hope this is the right number still. But if it is, kids are on board for tomorrow. Does 12:30 work for you? We could meet at the usual park. If it’s not Y/N, please don’t meet at the usual park because the kids are not on board. 

You chuckled at the end of his text, happy to see that Harry is always trying to make jokes and be the comedian. 

Hi, Harry! Don’t worry, this is Y/N. Probably would have hunted the person with my number down to get tomorrow’s plans. But that sounds perfect! I can't wait to see the kids tomorrow. See you then! 

Harry softly smiled at his phone, not feeling the need to respond and figured he would talk to you a lot more tomorrow while the kids are playing. He stared at the message for quite some time, completely blank as he couldn’t believe the chances that he happened to see you at the shop six months after the breakup, and now he’s making plans with you tomorrow; his jaw was aching from smiling so much. 

A few minutes later, he put his phone away to change before he comfortably situated himself under the blanket, feeling the heaviness of his eyes. But once he felt himself starting to drift away into dreamland, his phone buzzed on his nightstand, and he tried his best to ignore it, but curiosity got the best of him, so he picked up his phone and opened the new message. 

And I can’t wait to see you tomorrow too.  

And just like that, Harry was wide awake, struggling to sleep, but a smile permanently etched on his face for the night. 

The day that everyone in the Styles’ household had been waiting for had finally arrived. Luckily, the kids had gotten their needed hours of sleep; Harry had only gotten a few hours of sleep, but when the sun seeped through his curtains, he didn’t dread getting up for the day. Instead, he felt a rush of eagerness, instantly remembering what the day held for him and his kids, and he jumped right out of bed. 

Once the four of them were out of the house, Harry had successfully fed, cleaned, and changed his children with no complaints. The house and car ride was filled with conversations about how excited they were to see you again, asking how many more hours there was until they got to see you and if they were almost at the park. 

Screams bounced off the roof of the car once Harry parked on the side of the curb; the twins had already taken their seatbelts off, getting antsy as they waited for their dad to open the car from the outside. Harry unbuckled Rory, carrying him until he rounded on the other side of the car to open the door for the twins. They quickly jumped out, clearly excited, but Harry did not forget to remind them that this was still a public area and anything could happen. 

“Girls, slow down, please.” Estelle was holding Harry’s hand as Mira was holding her sister’s; Harry was still carrying Rory in his arms because his sister’s were practically lugging Harry with all their might, trying to get to their usual spot, so he didn’t want Rory to get hurt. “Loves, you know Y/N would tell you the exact same thing. Please, just slow down for me.” He pulled the Y/N card on them, knowing that they were better listeners with you than they are with him. 

Once they were all close enough, they spotted a thick beige blanket under the tree with a picnic basket, and you sitting on top of it, setting everything up. 

“Y/N!” The girls both screamed, Estelle letting go of Harry’s hand as they both ran towards you. 

You looked up at the sound of your name, eyes brightening at the little girls running. “My Princesses! Hi, my loves!” You opened your arms widely, inviting the twins into your arms— they practically collided into your arms, making you fall onto your back since you didn’t get the chance to stand up—and embracing them with a big hug. Laughs came out of all of your mouths as wide smiles permanently stayed on your faces. “Oh, I missed you two so much!” You kissed both of their cheeks, making them giggle. You stood up, helping the girls up and brushed their clothes off with your hand from the grass. Harry and Rory were in sight, and Harry put the little boy down, making Rory run towards you. “My sweetheart, oh, you’ve gotten so big.” You hugged Rory to your chest, placing your hand behind his head as your other arm wrapped around his small body. 

You were glad that Rory still had some memory of you, and didn’t shy away behind his father’s leg. You placed soft kisses on his cheeks, taking in his baby scent that you always loved. 

After Rory was starting to fuss in your arms, most likely due to feeling overwhelmed from the lack of space, you let go of him before standing up. 

“Hi, Y/N,” Harry greeted, offering a hug, which you gladly took. 

You rubbed his back. “Hi, Harry. I’m so glad I’m here with you all.” You pulled away, smiling at him. Harry’s heart pounded against his chest at the sight of you smiling up at him. His heart did a backflip at the sight of your gorgeous smile, trickling all the way down to his stomach where it triggered the butterflies to release from the net. 

“Please, we were all really excited to see you. So, thank you for agreeing.” His hand innocently ran down your arm, sending shivers down your spine. 

You turned around to look at the kids who were making themselves comfortable on the blanket. You and Harry joined them as you sat in between Estelle and Rory, and Harry sat in between Mira and Rory. 

“Okay, so I made some sandwiches. You all still like grilled cheese, right?” You hoped, and the twins nodded; you turned towards Rory. “What about you, sweet pea? Grilled cheese?” At the sound of cheese, Rory nodded his head and clapped his hands, making you smile. 

Harry was so lost in his mind and heart that he was simply so distracted in helping you out as you unwrapped the sandwiches from the foil, putting them on a paper plate. He was just so fond of watching you interact with his children so naturally, like there was no time that was wasted when you and Harry were apart. And he was especially happy that the kids still loved you just as much as they did when you two were together; and how they still kept talking about you despite the breakup. 

Aside from you and Harry, the kids had taken the breakup the hardest. From the knowledge they had based on what Harry and Laurie told them, they understood that their mommy and daddy couldn’t be together anymore due to adult reasons; it took them a while to adjust to that, but they eventually managed and figured it was better and more fun. But when Harry had to break the news on why they wouldn’t be seeing their ‘Pretty Fairy Second Mom’ anymore, they took it harder than expected. They simply looked at it as you didn’t want to see them anymore, which wasn’t the case at all, Harry explained. 

“Sometimes adults need to take some time apart, loves. That does not mean that Y/N doesn’t love you anymore because she does very much, I can tell you that. But it's good to have some time to yourself, especially in a relationship.” 

“But daddy, I thought you were gonna be together forever with Y/N,” Estelle spoke up, tears in her eyes. He was lucky that his kids loved you so much, and he never doubted that they weren’t going to. But his fear had come true when you two called it quits and he had to tell them the truth. 

“And maybe we will, but as for right now, it’s best to be apart. Sometimes being apart saves the relationship rather than letting it burn,” he told them honestly, which was the best as he could explain it. 

“D-Does Y/N still love you?” Mira asked softly. It wasn’t like Mira to be so soft spoken, which meant that the breakup had affected her deeply. 

Harry sighed, grabbing both of their small hands. “She does,” he replied for the sake of more tears coming out of their eyes—plus, he was taking your word for it back at the cafe. “And she also loves you all so much too,” he reminded them again. What he really wanted to say was that maybe one day you two will get back together, but he really didn’t want to get their hopes up. 

Looking back on his conversation from half a year ago, he was glad that he told them the truth on why you two broke up. He didn’t want to confuse his children even further, making them completely oblivious to the situation—he just wanted to be honest with them because he hoped you two would meet again and get back together at some point. 

“Harry, would you like one?” You asked, bringing Harry back out of his thoughts. He smiled, nodding, not trusting his voice to speak; and you gladly handed him a plate with a sandwich, pouring some chips onto the side—his favorite chips, you still remembered. 

“Thank you.” He smiled softly. The corners of your lips turned up as you bashfully looked at the picnic basket in front of you. You placed Rory’s plate in front of him as he seemed to have crawled to sit closer to you, and you cut out his sandwich into small pieces, along with cutting his grapes in half. “Oh, you don’t have to do that.” He stopped you from what you were doing, ready to take Rory from your side as he didn’t want you to feel obligated to take care of him.

“Oh, if you don’t want me to, that’s fine. But I wouldn’t mind feeding him a bit.” 

“If you want to.” 

You gave him the sweetest grin, and Harry was lucky to be sitting down because his knees would give out on him if he were standing. “I want to.” He only nodded, a crimson color laid on his cheeks. 

Harry comfortably watched as you made conversation with the twins as you fed Rory. You always gave them your undivided attention; your expression always lit up everytime they talked about something they were passionate about or interested in, and it just made Harry fall even more with how you were always so supportive in what his kids loved. You were always uplifting them, never dragging their hopes and dreams down. 

After everyone was finished with their meals and had time to digest their food, the twins asked if they could go on the swings and Harry said yes. The tree that they were under was only a few feet away, so Harry had a clear view of his girls. 

“You’re, like, a magician.” Harry suddenly said, breaking the silence once the girls were safely on the swing. 

You chuckled. “How’s that?” 

“It’s like hiring a magician at a party—everyone is so excited to see what they do and see them in general—you’re like that; the girls and Rory were so excited to see you.” 

You playfully gasped, holding Rory to your chest. “You were excited to see me? Well, I was excited to see you!” You booped his nose, making Rory giggle. 

“Fairy!” He exclaimed, and you and Harry laughed. Rory was a quiet two-year-old, but he picked up on keywords that he repeatedly said. 

“So, are you seeing anyone?” You cut to the chase, skipping the small talk.

Harry chuckled, running a hand through his hair. “Nope. Not entirely sure if anyone wants to date a thirty-four-year-old with three kids.” 

You raised your brows in shock, and he knew that look you’re giving him very well—prepared to tease him; even though you weren’t that much younger than him either. “What? Do you think no one wants to date a hot dad? Harry, you’re peak-dilf, everyone wants to date you.” 

“And what about you? Do you wanna date me? A dilf?” He teased; a smirk that you knew all too well appeared on his face, making you want to kiss it off, which was what you used to do. 

Pursing your lips and cheeks heating up, you gave him an obvious look before you said, “Think you know the answer to that one, baby.” In all honesty, the pet name had slipped, and for a brief moment your eyes widened at the realization, but you brushed it off and continued with your confident and teasing attitude; and it worked quite well on Harry because he definitely heard what you used to call him loud and clear. It made his heart flutter as he missed you calling him that; he never wanted to hear that name come out of anyone else’s mouth because only yours would do it justice. 

Harry was left to ponder about your response before you changed the subject, talking to Rory. “Sweets, do you wanna go on the slide?” The little boy jumped up and down, pulling your arm as he had a big smile on his face. You looked at Harry, and he gave you a nod, telling you that he would stay put and watch your belongings. 

You and Rory walked hand in hand, or more like hand and finger, to the slide. It was an open purple slide with two sides, and it lasted about two seconds if you slid correctly and if the slide was slippery enough. You helped Rory step onto the playground as the dull metal steps were quite high for him to reach on his own before you guided him towards the slide. 

Sitting down at the top and on the edge of the slide, you carried Rory into your lap, hyping him up for what he had been waiting for. “Ready, sweets? Are you ready?” Your tone was pure excitement as you squeezed and tickled his belly. 

“Go, Y/N, go!” Directed Rory, and you scooted forward and held onto the sweet boy in your arms tightly as you two slid down the slide. Mouthfuls of squealing screams and giggles came from Rory’s mouth as he clapped his hands towards the end of the slide, causing you to cheer as well. 

And the proper dad that he was, Harry clicked the red button on the screen to stop recording you and Rory from the slide. He zoomed in, capturing the bright smiles placed on his sweet boy’s and the love of his life’s face, screenshotting the perfect frame. He didn’t think the day could have gone any better than this; it was quite the perfect day, he thought. 

When it was rounding two in the afternoon, Rory’s eyes were starting to droop, exhaustion taking over him from running around for almost an hour that his little body couldn’t keep up, so a nap was in his favor. He lazily looked up at you, reaching his arms up for you to carry him, which you happily held him. He settled his head on your shoulder, and it only took a few kisses and back rubs for him to be out like a light while the sun still shined in his face. 

You walked over to the blanket, figuring it was time to call it a day at the park; Harry and the twins were running around nearby on the bedded grass area playing tag. They retreated to the blanket once they saw you with Rory in your arms, breaths heavy from their run. 

“Oh, my sweet, sweet boy.” Harry sighed when he got to spot under the tree; you handed Rory to him, admiring the two boys cuddling as Harry pressed quiet and soft kisses to his son’s head. Since your lap was available, Estelle and Mira took the chance to finally be able to properly cuddle you since Rory was taking most of your attention. The girls took one leg each, and you wrapped your arms around their waist, kissing their shoulder. 

The five of you stayed put for a while, calming down under the breezy weather that had started to pick up until it got even colder was when Harry decided it was time to leave. Luckily the girls were still awake to help with cleaning up, and were rather helpful because Harry was trying his best with Rory situated on one side of his body. 

Once all of you were next to your cars, Harry placed Rory in his car seat as you were hugging the girls goodbye. You and Harry agreed that everyone was too tired to go out for some ice cream since all the twins wanted to do was lie down. Harry knew he didn’t want the day to end, even though it was still quite early, but the older he got, the tougher it was to keep up with his little children who just loved running around; a relaxing and peaceful night was calling him. 

“Hey.” Harry closed the passenger door before he rounded the car to meet you on the grass. “I know we talked about going for ice cream today, but it seemed like we’re all too tired, but I was wondering…” he paused for a moment, a bit of hesitancy in his voice. “Would you like to come over? Maybe…for dinner, or to have a glass or w-water?” He scratched the back of his neck, nerves getting the best of him. 

You smiled, thinking he was the absolute cutest when he was flustered. “Harry, I’d love to. Feels like I haven’t drank any water so I’m parched,” you teased. 

He breathed out a laugh. “Okay, uh, I’ll see you home.” He gave you another smile before walking away and inside of his car, completely unaware of his choice of words. 

Home. More specifically, Harry’s home. It was a place that made you feel safe, and if you’re being honest, it’s been too long since you’d had complete solace. 

Your mental pep-talk throughout the drive toward Harry’s had helped in some way. Keeping it simple without driving your mind into overthinking every single thought, you laid it all down as if you were planning and preparing a business proposal. 

You didn’t want to dive deep into what Harry’s invitation could entail—more like you didn’t want to get your hopes up on if you two were to get back together because the potential rejection you could face would absolutely crush you. Harry’s a kind and sweet guy, he’s simply inviting a friend over for a drink and dinner, if you could even call yourself that. Plus, it was still early to fully call it a day, and he planned for ice cream after the park, so he was fulfilling that promise of sweet dessert. 

Without realizing, you’d been sitting in your car for a solid five minutes, staring over your steering wheel as you were parked on the curb in front of Harry’s house. Harry’s car was already in the driveway, so they were just waiting on you. 

You walked towards the front door, and it swung open before you even got the chance to knock. 

“Hey, thought you’d change your mind when you weren’t getting out of the car,” Harry joked, although that thought really crossed his mind when he peeked out through the window and saw you still in your car. 

You chuckled nervously. “Oh, no. I wouldn’t.” You stepped inside his house, and a wave of nostalgia rushed through you as if you were at the beach and the harsh current knocked you over as you were trying to walk against the sandy wind. 

Everything still looked the same—the same since the night you left without another word to the kids, just a note to Harry telling you to meet at the shop. A pinch of guilt appeared in your face as you frowned, and Harry immediately took notice, but you waved it off as you slightly smiled, telling him that you two would talk later. He didn’t press any further, waiting until later or when you were ready. Instead, he asked if you wanted anything to drink, to which he already knew you’d go for a class of Cabernet, and luckily, he had some in stock—more like, he still had the untouched bottle for when you stayed over. 

The two of you leaned against the cold granite counter as music softly played on the speaker that was connected through Bluetooth on his phone. Conversations were light, but it wasn’t awkward in any sense. As a matter of fact, it felt just like old times when you would stay over his house, talking about each other’s day and simply enjoying the presence of one another. That’s what you think this was, you thought—enjoying the fact that Harry was in front of you after so many months and you were cherishing it until the next set of months went by. 

After a few conversations and sips of wine later, the time had gone by fairly fast, which always happened when you were with him, and it was nearing five. The kids had woken up from their nap at four and quietly settled in the living room—the twins on the couch in front of the television and Rory was on the padded mat playing with his toys, occasionally talking to his sisters. Harry asked if you would be okay watching them so he could make dinner, and you were close to reminding him that he didn’t need to ask to watch his kids, but then again, you had to remind yourself that things were a bit different now. So, you said that you didn’t mind and walked over to the sofa chair next to the couch and watched TV with the girls as well as play with Rory. 

Twenty-five minutes had gone by and Harry called everyone, announcing that dinner was ready. You all walked into the dining room, taking your seats. Your assigned seat was next to Rory’s chair, which was in between you and Harry; the girls were sitting across from you. Once everyone took several bites of Harry’s dinner--a quick fettuccine alfredo--the chatter was back. You enthusiastically listened to the girls and Rory talk; it made Harry smile, loving how natural everything felt. 

Estelle tapped Harry’s shoulder, making him turn towards her with a smile on his face. “What is it, sunshine?” She got off her chair, leaning over to whisper something into his ear and he smiled, turning back to his family who was curious as to what Estelle had said. “Go ahead and ask her, love.” 

You put down your fork and placed your arms on the table. “What’s up, Princess?” 

“Uh, c-can we go to that place?” 

“What place is that?” You asked curiously. 

“That place where you told Daddy you loved him,” she responded quite bashfully. Your mouth was slightly open, not expecting her to say what she did. Looking over at Harry, he simply had a soft smile on his face with his brows raised, shrugging his shoulders.

Did you want to go back there? The answer was a simple yes. There wasn’t any excuse that you could possibly make up on the spot as to why you couldn’t go there, and it wasn’t necessarily a bad place whenever you thought about it. In fact, you really missed going over there and you would be lying if you said that you didn’t think about that place often. 

Your head turned towards Estelle. “Sure, why not. How about we go tomorrow?” You asked everyone, and they all had smiles on their faces. You looked at Harry, directly asking him for permission. “Is that okay?” His elbow was resting against the arm of the brown chair, fingers placed under his lips as he slightly puckered his soft and pink lips; without looking under the table, you knew his legs were crossed. Harry smiled, nodding his head, and everyone cheered. 

The rest of the time everyone was sitting at the dinner table, you all talked about plans for tomorrow, and everyone was really excited. Once it was almost eight, Harry realized that it was almost their bedtime, so he hurried them up the stairs to get ready for bed before saying goodnight to you, getting in as many hugs and kisses as they could get. 

Harry was upstairs, changing Rory and putting him to bed before he walked down and found you in the kitchen washing dishes. He slipped past you, placing his hand along your lower back briefly before he grabbed the dish rag. The action sent a chill down your spine and you immediately missed his hands on you. 

“The kids seem really excited about tomorrow.” Harry broke the silence, glancing over at you as you continued to wash the dishes. 

You nodded. “Yeah, I’m really excited too.” 

Harry noticed the slight shortness, and he thought it may be because you were tired. “Hey, are you okay?” 

You turned off the water and faced him, crossing your arms as he did the same. 

“Do the kids hate me?” The corner of his lips turned up before he started laughing, clutching his stomach. If it were any other time, you would obsess over his laugh; it was music to your ears, the highlight of your day, and the sun when it’s bright out. You softly slapped his arm. “Harry! I’m being serious!” 

“Darling, you’re joking, right?” Your heart briefly fluttered at his nickname for you. “Those kids love you!” He noticed your change of attitude and that you’d been thinking about this for a while and beating yourself up over it. 

“It’s just…I don’t want them to think that we broke up and I forgot about them. I mean I understand if they see it that way because I left without saying another word for six months--didn’t even get to say goodbye to them and have a proper talk. I just don’t want them to hate me.” You looked down at your feet as you played with the thin silver band on your middle finger.  

Harry’s seen you in work mode, and it reeks confidence and power. You don’t need much reassurance during work unless it’s when your employees tell you that progress is moving along. But this was completely different; you needed all the reassurance that you could get to get it through your head that the kids that you’d come to love--from the moment you met them--don’t hate you. And Harry didn’t mind telling you over and over again. 

“They were just that we split up, that’s all. But they quickly understood why.” 

“What’d you tell them?” You asked curiously. 

“The truth--that sometimes it’s better to be apart for a while rather than drive ourselves crazy. Told them that when the time is right, then maybe we’ll get back together.” The look in his eyes was so comforting that you immediately fell into them. Harry was always the best with giving you that extra reassurance that you and his kids need. 

You felt the extra beat in your chest that pumped so harshly against your chest, but it was surrounded by butterflies, making it flutter throughout your body. As you looked so deeply into Harry’s beautiful green eyes, you realized one of two things; the first thing was that you never wanted to look so deeply into another person’s eyes unless it was Harry’s; and the second thing was that you were incredibly and overwhelmingly still in love with this man and his three children, and there hadn’t been a day that gone by where you weren’t. 

Taking a deep breath, itches were crawling up your skin, begging you to say something. “D-Do you think it’s time?” Your voice asked shyly. 

Harry was taken back by your question as he raised his brows. He couldn’t deny the nerves that he felt whenever he was around you, but your question seemed to have increased his nervousness. 

“We’ve been separated for what feels like a long time now.” He paused, taking a deep breath as he recouped his thoughts to say the right words. “I think-”

“Daddy?” Yours and Harry’s head whipped towards the staircase, finding Estelle at the bottom of it with groggy eyes. 

Harry walked towards his sunshine. “What is it, my love?” He kneeled down onto the bottom step, matching her height. Estelle told him that she couldn’t sleep, and that she’s been tossing and turning for a while, so Harry told her that he would lay with her until she fell asleep and carried her to her bedroom. He looked back at you as he was walking up the steps, and you gave him a soft smile, letting him know that it was completely okay. 

You finished tidying up the kitchen, wiping down the counters and cleaning the dining table until you realized that you needed to get ready for tomorrow’s adventure. 

Once Harry came down the stairs, he found you sitting on the edge of the armchair with your purse on your shoulder; you looked up as he walked up to you. 

“I’m gonna head out.” 

Harry’s slightly frowned. “Oh, you can stay the night if you want to.” 

“No, it’s okay, thanks.” You really did want to stay the night, but you didn’t have a change of clothes for tomorrow. “I’ll be here tomorrow morning.” He nodded, walking you to the door, opening it for you. 

You stepped out on his doorstep, turning around as you wrapped your arm around his waist, tiptoeing to plant a kiss to his cheek. The slightest bit of touch from your lips sent Harry’s skin on fire, warming up to the affection. The touch was sent away too quickly as you let go of him completely, giving him one last smile before walking to your car and waving at him as you drove away. 

Harry closed the door, the palm of his hand cupped the cheek that you kissed and he sighed as if he was shot with Cupid’s love-arrow, and he wouldn’t mind it if it meant he would feel your affection every single day. 

You arrived at the Styles household at ten in the morning with a tote-full of snacks and water, knowing the kids would get hungry from all the walking. You got there forty-five minutes earlier than planned, knowing that the Styles family wouldn’t be out the door right on time because Harry has three kids, two of them who bicker and complain from time to time—especially when they’re sleepy—and a two-year-old who was starting to run away from everything. So, you figured Harry would appreciate your help. 

When Harry saw you standing on his doorstep, he let out a sigh of relief. He was still in his striped pajamas pants and a white t-shirt, holding a small pair of olive green pants. You walked in and saw Rory running around half naked, despite it being early in the morning. You told Harry that he could shower and get ready for the day, and to leave it to you because you’ll handle it—plus, you both knew that the kids often listened to you more than their own dad. He smiled appreciatively, kissing your head briefly before walking up the stairs and getting ready. 

Once Rory saw you, he stopped running around the house and instead, ran towards you and into your arms. You carried him up the stairs and to his room to get some clothes on him, and luckily, Harry was able to bathe him before you showed up. You gave him his favorite toy to fumble with before you walked into Mira's room, setting Rory on her twin bed before helping her get ready. You left Rory in Mira’s room and went to Estelle’s bedroom, doing the same. 

By the time Harry walked downstairs, you and the three kids were sitting on the couch, eating a banana. He smiled, slowing his steps as he was amazed at the quietness and stillness in the house, but then again, he wasn’t that amazed because he knew you’d come in and get things in order. 

Harry’s home was a two minute walk to the train station, and everyone decided to take the train since it was what you and Harry did when you two were dating, and the kids really wanted to walk through the entire path of their father’s love story. 

Luckily, there weren’t that many people on the train—it was practically empty—so they didn’t have to rush to get a spot for the kids. Rory sat in the middle of his sisters as they all smiled brightly towards Harry’s phone that was capturing the adorable children for a sweet memory sake. You and Harry were standing, making sure neither of the kids fell over if the train made a halting stop. You held onto the metal bar above you, Harry held the bar that was mounted into the floor, and you both watched the kids interact with one another—counting on their fingers, booping one another’s noses, and laughing; it was every parent’s dream. 

Without noticing, Harry moved closer to you, placing his hand directly next to yours; the side of your hand touched his, and you looked at him with wide eyes while your heart fluttered. You were hip to hip, and you saw the smirk he had on his face while occasionally glancing over at you. You couldn’t help the heat that rose onto your cheeks because it felt like old times when you two used to ride the train together and it would get too packed to where you had to stand up; he would always face you as your hands touched—sometimes he would even intertwine your fingers together while you two held the bar as you were one—and he would hover over you, giving you plentiful kisses like the true romantic that he was. 

The train ride took about 30 minutes and it was a two minute walk to the place that gave you so many happy memories and nostalgia—International Rose Test Garden was where the memories of you and Harry were stored. 

You had the girls on either side of you, holding their hands; and Harry carried Rory since he was likely to run around and Harry didn’t want to risk his safety. 

The sun was bright—beautiful for a day in the garden as the roses and flowers bloomed ever so widely. All of you walked the rows and rows of flowers, occasionally taking pictures in front of the rose bushes.

Remembering all the times you and Harry were hand in hand, laughing until your stomachs were sore, like you did an intense ab workout, and there were tears resting in the outer corner of your eyes. All the memories that were swirling around in your head made you come to the conclusion to one thing: you never want to be without Harry and his kids ever again. 

You don’t know how it took you so long to realize this, maybe it was seeing them for the first time in six months that you realized that you had it great—a small family that accepted you and loved you for who you were, and you loved them just the same. 

Harry walked beside you, the kids skipping and playing around in the grass in front of you two. Confidently, you slipped your hand into Harry’s ringed hand, immediately intertwining your fingers together as if your hand knew what it was missing. Harry briefly looked down before looking at you. He smiled, and turned his head back towards the kids, not making a big deal of it as his warm hand accepted the coldness of yours. 

You gently tugged against his arm, pulling him back as he came face to face with you; a quiet gasp came out of his mouth when doing so. You looked up at him with bright eyes, and Harry was taken back to a year and a half ago where you, coincidentally, were in this same spot on the very green patch of grass. 

“Harry…” you breathed out, looking down at your feet nervously. He made the bold move to step closer to you, chests almost touching. Harry lifted your chin up with his fingers, locking eyes with you so intently that you practically lost your breath. 

“What is it?” He whispered. 

Taking a deep breath, you said, “I-I realized something.” 

“Yeah? What’s that?” 

Glancing over at the kids, they were giving you big smiles and thumbs up for reassurance, and your heart swooned at their support and love they provided you to finally get back together with their father, even if you weren’t their biological mother. 

You looked back at Harry, who was waiting patiently. “I love you. I still do and never stopped.” Harry felt like he stopped breathing at that moment. “You make me so happy—you and the kids, and I don’t want to be without you all anymore. I-I don’t like how it’s only taken me this much time to tell you this, but it felt like the perfect time since this was the place where I first told you I loved you.” 

Harry smiled, taking your hands into his. His thumbs smoothed your skin on the back of your hand before he brought them up to his lips and kissed them so delicately. The action made you smile softly before your mind had switched it to thinking that it was affection before the rejection. 

But then he opened his mouth to speak such beautiful words that you had been aching to hear during the breakup. 

“You’re my everything. I truly don’t know what I’d do without you because you. You’re part of my source of happiness, and life didn’t feel the same without you—the kids could agree with me on that.” He chuckled, looking at them to find them holding hands and jumping around in circles. “But I know that we separated for the better only for us to come back stronger than ever, and I’m never gonna let go of you again, okay?” 

Tears pricked your eyes before they streamed down your cheeks. Your heart felt like it was pounding harder than ever, but it was filled with so much love from and for this man in front of you. 

Harry wiped away your tears, leaning in to kiss your forehead, down to your eyelids as he kissed your tears away. He pulled away and you opened your eyes, giving each other a relieved and happy smile. 

“I love you,” he said, and he swore he saw the brightest smile he’s ever seen—brighter than the sun. “Always have and always will.” 

“And I love you. C-Can you kiss me, please?” 

Harry grinned. “It would be an honor.” 

Placing his palms on the side of your face, he leaned his forehead against yours. Your hands were wrapped around his wrists, rubbing his skin softly. With a smile, he kissed you with such softness and passion that the flowers bloomed largely and the sun shined ever so brightly. The kids cheered and clapped, making bystanders think that you’d just gotten engaged, but you both knew that would be the next step. Your stomach was in knots, butterflies surrounding your body as he captured your lips with his. Hugging Harry’s waist, you pulled him closer and wrapped your arms around him, and he kissed you harder, effortlessly moving his lips in sync with yours as if he was a pro on kissing you, which he was. 

Harry pulled away first, giving you several pecks before opening his eyes. “God, I missed doing that. Missed you so much, darling.” 

“I missed you too, baby.” You were high on happiness, high on love. “I’m sorry it took us this long.” A slight frown appeared on your face, but Harry kissed it away. 

“Hey, hey. None of that. I would’ve loved you until the end of time. I don’t care how long it took, you’re my forever,” he vowed, not planning to break that promise. 

Missing his lips on yours, you leaned up to kiss him again while your arms were wrapped around his neck and his were around your waist, holding you tightly as if he was afraid you’d run off. 

Suddenly, you started giggling into the kiss, making Harry smile before he pulled away. 

“What’s so funny?” He asked. You started thinking about the conversation from the park when you asked him if he was seeing someone. 

You curled in your lips before you said, “You’re a literal dilf, and I’m so in love with you.” 

please tell me all of your thoughts, feelings, favorite moments and scenes! thank you for reading <3