#IM YELLING AND I WILL NOT STOP YELLING

[twisted-salt]

The Leviathan Club - Fem!Azul Headcanons

A/N: I just... really, really like her. She lives in my head rent free because the genderbent art I see on Twitter is imprinted on my brain. We love powerful business women on this blog. Please have some of my brain rot because I've been imagining her, post graduation owning her own establishment. An elevated Mostro Lounge, if you will. Pretend my banner is her, I don't have an artistic bone in my body so she cannot be edited together. We're doing our best.

Prompt: None really. Just random thoughts about post graduation life. Character(s): Azul Ashengrotto (fem), some Floyd and Jade Leech TW:

✦꒷ Azul owns what Idia Shroud tried to call the Mostro Lounge v2.0. In a sense it is similar to what the Mostro Lounge was in NRC but is located in a well populated part of a bustling City between the Nightlife district and the Classy neighborhoods.

✦꒷ This is to attract young adults from rich families looking for a taste of the nightlife without going to a full on club or rave. 

✦꒷ The Mostro Lounge had been her baby from its opening but during her 4 years, Azul had been sketching out this new club/lounge’s name and layout on the side. Always trying to one up herself. She landed on the name the Leviathan Club.

✦꒷ Azul makes many… “business” arrangements with various vendors during its building. Striving to use local produce and goods. Attempting to pick out the classiest plates and serveware. 

✦꒷ The Tweels are still with her, surprisingly enough (m!Tweels for my self-indulgent ass). They have a bit of a soft spot for their “tako-chan”-- a loving nickname from Floyd; she only lets them call her that behind closed doors. Afterall, she has an image to uphold.      ✦。Tweels are absolute puppies though in this AU. Resting their heads on her lap after a long week of work at the lounge.      ✦。They’re bouncers for the Club. She’s hired some rather experienced staff members to ensure her boys don’t have to work in the kitchen or behind the bar-- though they will hop over the bar or burst in the kitchen to help as needed.

✦꒷Idia helped build the Club’s security system. The cameras, the cards needed to get in and out of spaces off limits to the public, the hidden walls that need passcodes– he created all of them as a favor. The details to the “favor” are kept under wraps however. Only Floyd and Jade know of the inner workings.

✦꒷ She still makes contracts with those in the club that look like they’re struggling through something. (You call it ‘preying on unfortunate souls’, she calls it ‘being an outstanding member of the community’.)

✦꒷ There are opposing whispers about her character. Some say she is a soft spoken woman hiding behind the facade that attempts to make her the modern day mob boss; others say she is rather diabolical should you breach a contract, you’ll be sorry.       ✦。The truth is mingled between the two.       ✦。Azul secretly loves it when others underestimate her though. It makes it much easier to take them off the map when the fools misbehave. 

✦꒷Fem!Azul has a taste for the finer things in life. She’s a bit of a snob when it comes to things like tea and coffee and (especially now that she’s been on land for more than a decade) her shoes.      ✦。Wears black Johnny Chu’s, not as expensive as the one her old friend Vil Schoenhiet wore, but still classy, clean, and comfortable footwear.      ✦。The heel has been driven into the chest of men that found themselves in breach of contract.      ✦。She has an attraction to cool, crisp colors and still dresses herself in black or gray suits and skirts with a touch of purple somewhere in her jewelry or accessories to pay homage to her former dorm. 

✦꒷There are still a few items on the Leviathan Club’s menu that were on the Mostro Lounge’s menu like the infused water that Vil made so famous. There was a proud sense of nostalgia she had when creating the menu.

✦꒷Azul does join the stage on rare occasions if the band or DJ insists. She prefers slow melodic tunes to sing or entertain her guests. 

[inkskinned]

they want to talk about mental illness and acceptance and how everyone is a little ocd it's cute and quirky and their "intrusive thoughts" are about cutting their hair off and you say yours are about taking a razorblade to your eye and they say ew can you not and everyone is a little adhd sometimes! except if you're late it's a personality flaw and it's because you are careless and cruel (and someone else with adhd mentions they can be on time, so why can't you?) and it's not an eating disorder if it's girl dinner! it's not mania if it's girl math! what do you mean you blew all of your savings on nonrefundable plane tickets for a plane you didn't even end up taking. what do you mean that you are afraid of eating. get over it. they roll their little lips up into a sneer. can you not, like, trauma dump?

they love it on them they like to wear pieces of your suffering like jewels so that it hangs off their tongue in rapiers. they are allowed to arm-chair diagnose and cherrypick their poisons but you can't ever miss too many showers because that's, like, "fuckken gross?" so anyone mean is a narcissist. so anyone with visual tics is clearly faking it and is so cringe. but they get to scream and hit customer service employees because well, i got overwhelmed.

you keep seeing these posts about how people pleasers are "inherently manipulative" and how it's totally unfair behavior. but you are a people pleaser, you have an ingrained fawn response. in the comments, you have typed and deleted the words just because it is technically true does not make it an empathetic or kind reading of the reaction about one million times. it is technically accurate, after all. you think of catholic guilt, how sometimes you feel bad when doing a good deed because the sense of pride you get from acting kind - that pride is a sin. the word "manipulation" is not without bias or stigma attached to it. many people with the fawn response are direct victims of someone who was malignantly manipulative. calling the victims manipulative too is an unfair and unkind reading of the situation. it would be better and more empathetic to say it is safety-seeking or connection-seeking behavior. yes, it can be toxic. no, in general it is not intended to be toxic. there is no reason to make mentally ill people feel worse for what we undergo.

you type why is everyone so quick to turn on someone showing clear signs of trauma but you already know the fucking answer, so what's the point of bothering. you kind of hate those this is what anxiety looks like! infographics because at this point you're so good at white-knuckling through a severe panic attack that people just think you're stoic. even people who know the situation sometimes comment you just don't seem depressed. and you're not a 9 year old white kid so there's no way you're on the spectrum, you're not obsessed with trains and you were never a good mathematician. okay then.

mental illness is trending. in 2012 tumblr said don't romanticize our symptoms but to be fair tiktok didn't exist yet. there's these series of videos where someone pretends to be "the most boring person on earth" and is just being a normal fucking person, which makes your skin crawl, because that probably means you are boring. your friend reads aloud a profile from tinder - no depressed bitches i fucking hate that mental illness crap. your father says that medication never actually works.

you still haven't told your grandmother that you're in therapy. despite everything (and the fact it's helping): you just don't want her to see you differently.

[isjasz]

[Day 287]

HAPPY EARTH DAY to plant some potatoes :D THIS IMPROMPTU COLLAB WENT BONKERS WTF

Colors by @sillyfairygarden @bad12amcomic (also prompt from her) and @kunehokki in order and lineart/sketch by me!

[cheesebits]

more shima doodles. i had to get this boy out of my system. Really enjoyed this week’s episode !!

[gunsatthaphan]

🍒🫶🏻

[andoutofharm]

more than an hour

[cozylittleartblog]

FUCK NAZIS

[andy-clutterbuck]

ANDY PHOTOGRAPHED BY GIANFRANCO TRIPODO IN 2017

[hella1975]

it's been pointed out on here before that a lot of terf arguments are actually rooted in sexist idealology that feminists fought and died to unnormalise decades ago and that's its own kettle of fish but one thing i also find very frustrating about this so called 'radical' feminism is that it's so... defeatist? like the moment you categorically label an entire section of society as Bad and Inherently Evil then there's also the implication that nothing can be done about it, and it completely takes all accountability away. saying all men are evil is just another way of saying boys will be boys. he raped her because he's a man. he hit her because he's a man. he didn't listen because he's a man - it's almost offensively oversimplified. there's no point trying to fix this issue in society because men are just Like That, okay! so now what? it's not like they're going anywhere, so you just accept that 50% of the population are evil and will forever treat you terribly and there's nothing to be done about it bc they're biologically predisposed to it? like is that fr the argument here? you're soooo radical for that

[bridge-demon]

thinking about certain aspects of death the kid's character that i wish were talked abt more. like... he's a crybaby. he's a showoff. he's sassy. he's really not that bad w/ people for the most part, as long as he isn't freaking over them being too asymmetrical or something. he cares deeply for his friends. he's smart but in a dumb way. do y'all get me.

[wowa-bublord]

Does your Zack ever get to his true breaking point where everything is just too much to push away and he can't help but show his true vulnerability? And if so, what or who is the catalyst?

OMG I RRRRR I LOVED DRAWING 4 THIS ONE OKAY SO. with the au, zack will reach a breaking point with the way he's handling his emotions by blocking them off/bottling them up. It's inevitable. The question of what/who is the catalyst and not when or if it happens hehehe AND IM SO EXCITED TO ANSWER. Through out the au story, zack is stuck in this sorta mentality.

he's so reliant on Cloud being okay, that he can't focus on anything else (for reasons i can discuss another time). My instinctive reaction, it to think that Cloud waking up would give him enough emotional relief to let down some of those walls. But, then I thought that if Zack bases his emotional wellbeing so heavily on cloud...

then theres not going to be a point where Cloud is suddenly 'okay' enough in Zacks brain to let it out. Life has its ups and downs, recovery from physical/mental trauma like cloud went through especially has its ups and downs. Theres always going to be some excuse for Zack to close up even further, particularly since he chooses to be in a caretaker role for Clouds early recovery when he needs it.

So then my mind hopped over to Tifa and Barret, his two closest friends in this au. But I thought that also could only go so far, Zack wants to appear strong for the people he cares for, and in his mind, he's somehow 'tricked' Barret and Tifa into thinking he's stable and tough enough to be their friend, he doesn't want to risk suddenly being too much. (IMPOSTER SYNDROME GANG RISE UP) And since Zack is so numb to violence and battle, I think it'd take a lot to push him out of that even in physically violent scenarios (u could still try though. whump writers i am on ur side 4ever) And not only that, but Tifa and Barret have only known Zack as he is now. They know that he's definitely a bit weird, but they don't know how far that goes, as this is the only version of Zack they've ever met.

BUT HE OBVIOUSLY will still have his own explosion. It's necessary, it's inevitable. Just look at that guy. So I thought, who else?

and who else could it be if not her?

[aeirithgainsborough]

“So time heals all wounds, I guess.” “It wasn’t time that did it.” THE LAST OF US HBO (2023)

[sparring-spirals]

laudna comparing herself and fcg and the effort to be more than what their creators made them for.... aaaaaahhh. AAAAaaaAAAAaaaaAaaAaaa

[azuneekun]

i come check ur blog everytime my friends slander shane to my face. its a type of shane palette cleanser. ur the only mf who gets me

Im glad you can feel some sort of sanctuary in my blog bcz shane fans r always going through the fucking trenches in this fandom

[broken-egg-yolk-blog]

harley didn’t see his big brother for months after he went off on his big quest on the argo ii. the next time he sees leo, it’s over within minutes.

[capricores]

gemini, virgo, pisces, cancer, capricorn and scorpio placements when someone asks them to take on another responsibility when they're already overwhelmed and completely burnt out