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#IVE TESTED MY HYPOTHESIS
garbashedump · 7 months
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what if they were human?
kay kay kay so i was thinking what would the bugs loook like if they we in a human form or like in a disguse similar to scrabby and this is what i got:
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I was also thinking hmm.... well beetles are one of the most diverse species in the world and literally I watched a video talking about how they collected beetles for a sample in the wild and out of those beetles they discovered 7 new species. Soooooo I was like what if they were different races instead?
honestly, I'd be so funny bc of how Scrabby is ginger and he just starts singing the Animaniacs song if someone asks his race
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its literally just this lol
also I did as much research as I could ofc :p
Also one with the pink/green eyes (Popstar) belongs to @chaosaliien and the one with purple eyes (Stella) belongs to @liqu3d
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xerith-42 · 3 months
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Y'all remember that long ass essay I wrote about Blaze in which I watched all of MyStreet but only the scenes he's in to prove that while he started great, the writers ultimately fell off so hard in writing him it stopped being funny and started pissing me off?
I think I might've found the MCD character I could do that with
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fightingtrim · 1 year
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gruh. thinkin abt gender and race and stuff. but not in a coherent way
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warlordfelwinter · 2 years
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i think being a homeowner is going to cement my descent into being the dad friend
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cerealxperimentslain · 2 months
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“a lot of people go to the doctor when they really don’t have to” i don’t actually care about the feelings of doctors, sorry! as someone in my 20s with several Medical Conditions there is nothing i hate more than “doctor who resents you for having the gall to think you might have a medical condition in your 20s” and that’s the majority of doctors i’ve seen.
one doctor even tried to argue that actually i was mistaken about my at the time only Medical Condition as a way to undermine me, because he was too lazy to do more than glance at my medical journal. then he gave me a lecture about how i should just do as im told and how i dont want to have a medical condition because people who have those take a lot of medicine every day, and also that even if i did have a medical condition there’s nothing they can do about it anyway. (then when i left he called me the equivalent in tone of something like “toots”, but that’s a different story) (for any swedish understanders it was “stumpan”)
now, when it comes to my health i am a stubborn shithead so i will just keep going to the doctor until i have a satisfactory explanation, but many people don’t have the time or energy or (especially in places like the us) money to do that.
and surprise surprise! turns out when i kept going back to the doctor they actually did find another Medical Condition after all! (turns out you can have those at literally any age) and since then i have gotten one of those extremely rare doctors who actual cares to see you get better (a specialist doctor to be specific, and i specify because in my experience they are generally way more likely to actually care) so now i not only have regular testing to see that it doesn’t get worse (and getting worse in this case can literally kill me), but i even have medicine that makes me better!!! wow!!!!!!!
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yotaasuke · 7 months
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i think sex with a woman would fix me
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blanketburritotoro · 2 years
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I feel like most of my problems could be solved by an egregious amount of money.
Someone should give me approximately that much and let me test my hypothesis.
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bonesandthebees · 3 months
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chugging smoothies to see if u get an allergic reaction to them is the most fic!tommy thing ive ever seen you do
oh god you're right. although I think fic!tommy would do it to try and prove he doesn't have an allergy even when it's clear he does. like his mouth would be swelling and he'd go "fuck off I'm not allergic I'm FINE allergies are for pussies-" or something like that
I'm doing it as part of the scientific method to test a hypothesis because I have a human bio degree I rarely use so might as well use some of my leftover science knowledge on myself lmao
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tubapun · 13 days
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Watching Alien Invaders and I really love Fred's role as the Skeptic of the gang here, especially when viewed in concert with the other Mook films and Scooby canon writ large before that.
Fred was definitely kind of a skeptic in WAY, almost always the last one to believe a supernatural occurrence was actually happening, to the point that he had to be dragged away a few times cause he wanted to stay and investigate regardless of the real danger (fake or not that ghost wants to hurt you fred!!)
And I think that actually meshes really well with his appearance in A Pup Named, where he was this kid who ALWAYS thought the occurrence was supernatural (and/or red herring, but note the and. Dude thought his nemesis was a Martian on more than one occasion).
So of course when he matures a bit and has a couple dozen mysteries under his belt he's gonna realize that the supernatural is fake. But because he's so embarrassed by how long he believer in Mole Men, he's gone to the opposite extreme (this can tie into his autism btw, he had a special interest that got him in trouble and now he's trying to mask so very hard about it) where he just categorically denies that ghosts and ghouls can be real.
And then his friend group breaks up for a bit and he goes with Daphne because she was the closest at the end. It wasn't a bad break they just had different needs (and college plans) and they keep in touch and reminisce on the good ole days until they don't. Life just gets busy in your twenties.
And so he gets the gang back together the first chance he gets, cause Daphne believes and he wants to but the burden of proof is so high because the sample size of "monster that is fake" is enormous for him now. And so each Mook film he still is justified to be skeptical because like. Yeah Zombies were real, but that was a fluke, the witch ghost is fake. And then he's right and wrong on that at the same time so when Aliens come up he's like "look ive been tricked before but no more. I'll investigate but unless you've got hard proof I'll snark at you with my friends" and it rules.
And if you're wondering why Velma believes so immediately when Fred waits, the answer is that she, as a scientist, knows its better to work assuming the hypothesis can be true, rather than to deny it from the start. And she LOVES testing the hypothesis. Fred does too but he's seen enough that he's not gonna NOT snark and joke. And they're besties.
(This timeline ignores the scrappy era slightly, but it's also possible Daphne and Shaggy strike out on their own for a bit while Fred does college and then Daphne and Fred reconnect. This would account for why Daph is so convinced in the supernatural in ZI)
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queerian · 1 year
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watching @drdemonprince's conversation with Fern Brady and god this is why it's important to hear people like us talk about our experiences. i learn so much from other autistic people.
while talking about alexithymia fern described having ongoing and mysterious pain during a really stressful period of time that never went away no matter what she tried, and as soon as she received resolution on the thing she was stressed about, the pain also resolved. ive this exact experience a number of times and i have slowly been building a very contextually-specific hypothesis about it (my body builds up pain like a pressure valve and as long as i deny it it gets worse, and as soon as i give myself permission to take the rest i need - and take that rest - it tends to resolve. at least the acute moments. for the longest time, i would not let myself call in sick from work unless i was "sick enough", because i was terrified of being seen as unreliable, and because i was worried about losing the income for any missed days of work. i've always used up my PTO on sick days and doctor days because i needed so many of those.
ever since ive been working from home, and then promoted to a a role where i have a lot more ability to work around things like this without losing pay, i've suffered a lot fewer of those maxed out pressure valve moments.
my ibs in general and flareups have all also gotten a lot less acute.
fern's story just gave me a lightning bolt of realization, and put into perspective all this mysterious sporadic and chronic pain i experience that doctors can never really explain or understand no matter how much i describe it or how many tests i undergo. i just saw my doctor yesterday about it and she shrugged and suggested we continue to monitor it and as usual we ruled out all the things it probably isnt.
even ibs is one of those diagnoses of excluding what it isnt.
anyway. it's fucking incredible to hear someone talk about experiencing something and for the first time in three decades being able to point at that and go "yes!! me too!! that's the thing i experience too!!!"
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triptychofvoids · 6 months
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What do you like doing most with Mister Engineer, doc?
ohh 99.99% of time spent with herr conagher is time well spent as far as im concerned, so its not exactly easy to pick just one thing. that being said, if i had to pick just one.... i would say i like working on projects with him the most!
it doesnt matter what we're working on, whether it be a new weapon or improving an old one, a machine of some kind, testing a new hypothesis or finalizing a theory, lab work, base repairs, prosthetics, my experiments or his or a collaboration, any sort of project (and it varies widely!). at best we come up with something wonderful, and even in the worst case its usually still a good learning experience! hes the best person to share ideas with and there has been more than one occasion where a solo project has turned into a collaboration because i wanted a second opinion or advice, or needed his specialized expertise, or just hit a wall in my progress and wanted someone else to take a fresh look at it. and vice versa! he comes to me for help fairly often as well! i love to see what hes working on, hes always tinkering with something and i love to hear about it, even better if i get to join in! and of course, working on projects with him is not all work either.... it is mostly work, thats the whole point, but he makes wonderful company as well! im sure you can understand that even the most fun project can be ruined if you are stuck working on it with someone you dislike, but the reverse is also true! even the most boring or difficult projects can be fun if you are working on it with someone you like! that makes sense or? there is always something to talk about with him! but he also understands when to back off and be quiet if needed. its not very often that you find someone that can be pleasant company in both sound and in silence. ah,, i could go on but maybe ive answered your question by now aheh....
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youremyheaven · 6 months
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Once again you’ve given us another banger post😩
It’s such a weird coincidence that you started talking about names because I’ve been actually thinking about it a lot recently!
My name means “very holy”, I’m a punarvasu sun and I have a total of 4 planets + my ascendant in deva gana nakshatras. I also have my chart ruler in the 9th house.
I also have a friend who is a fellow punarvasu native, who’s name means “pure”. Her name also sounds like cat and she has many placements in cat yoni naks. One of her other names translates to “to have a fixation on” or “obsession”, and she has rahu 1H closely conjunct her ascendant.
I feel like I’ve been sending you a lot of asks recently 💀 every time you post I have some kind of revelation and feel the need to bombard you with a very specific personal example. I’m glad you found my nodal identity crisis ask somewhat thought provoking though, it was nice to see the idea expanding upon in a way that was actually comprehensible 😭
our minds 🤌🏼✨😤😂
thank you angel 🫶🏼
damnnn that's so cool??? glad to see that my hypothesis actually holds up 😭😭
idk if you intended to but it just occurred to me that Rahu influence can make others obsessed with you 😳maybe ill post about it later 😳😳
don't worry about sending me asks 😩😩you always send very thought provoking stuff 😩😩
of course hehe 😶‍🌫️it occurred to me why ive always felt really??? by the personality/behaviour of Nodal people. im extremely decisive and I have a strong sense of self (2023 being a Ketu year did test that tho UFF i can't imagine being a Nodal if that's what's it's like) and it's really??? confusing being around someone who has very loose morals or a shifting sense of self like but the more i understand those energies i see it from all angles and how not being tied to any one thing can also be very liberating if confusing
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ao3feed-brucewayne · 1 month
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A photos worth a thousand words.
read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/6qsajW4 by Weewoow_070603 A photo’s worth a thousand words. That’s what they say right? The thing is, could a photo be worth a thousand different words to different people. Tim writes a hypothesis based on that thought. If a photo could mean completely different things to different people, then photos could be used for deceit by using someone’s previous experiences to lead them to a certain conclusion, because people’s personal views and experiences manipulate how they interpret something inconspicuous. Now, in true scientific method, Tim must test the hypothesis. His 10-year-old brain eventually lands on faking his death. Words: 4823, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types Rating: Not Rated Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Tim Drake (DCU), Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Sebastian Ives, Bruce Wayne Additional Tags: Tim Drake Joins the Batfamily Early (DCU), Tim Drake-centric (DCU), Hurt/Comfort, Slightly open ending but not really, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Parents Jack Drake and Janet Drake, as always, look- if you read my fics i feel like you get the vibe- idk what to sya, Uhh- teen titans mentioned, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Jason Todd is Robin, No Beta read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/6qsajW4
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mymoodwriting · 2 years
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Request for Anon (Yandere Hybrid Jeno) 7.8k, drugs, needles, abuse, smut, non-con, assault, claws, fangs, blood, bite wound, claw marks, knotting, unsafe sex, murder, kidnapping
“Everything’s going to be okay.”
    Jeno looked up at you, trying to make out your face in the fog. He hoped you could see his smile under the oxygen mask. You gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.
“I’ll see you later.”
    Jeno made out your smile, able to close his eyes and rest peacefully. He held on to the feeling of your hand for as long as he could before he slipped into darkness.
🖤
    Jeno didn’t know how much time had passed, but when he opened his eyes again he felt groggy. The room he was in was the same as before, so that familiarity was comforting, but as he tried to sit up he groaned, his entire body feeling sore. He vaguely heard footsteps approaching but couldn’t really make anything out besides the strange pain he was feeling.
“Jeno, you’re awake! Oh no, don’t get up!”
    You rushed over and gently placed a hand on Jeno’s chest, getting him to lie back down. You didn’t step away until his head was on the pillow, and you pulled up the blanket. Jeno was relieved to see you, all his troubles seeming to wash away.
“Y/n…”
“Sh, take it easy. You only got out of surgery a few hours ago. I’m surprised you’re awake.”
“Is that bad?”
“No, not at all. Our initial hypothesis estimated at least a day before regaining consciousness, but seeing you now, I’m amazed. How do you feel?”
“Sore… like everything hurts…”
“That seems to be in line with our hypothesis.” You jotted that down. “Your body is adjusting to the changes, so don’t worry too much. You should rest though, we can start running tests and properly look you over once you’re well rested.”
“Okay.”
    You made sure everything was in order for Jeno to rest well before leaving. It took him a little while, but Jeno did manage to go back to sleep. He’d wake up on occasion, but would just close his eyes again. There wasn’t a clock around, or any windows, so he had no sense of time. No one else came around, and he didn’t feel like he could get out of bed on his own so he just kept going back to sleep. Although he did start feeling better after a while. 
“Jeno…” You softly whispered. “Jeno, wake up.”
“Hm…”
“Hi, how are you feeling?”
“Tired…”
“Tired? But you’ve just been sleeping?”
“I wanna sleep more.”
“I bet you do, but I think it’s about time you get some actual food in you.”
“Food… I really haven’t eaten anything… how long has it been now?”
“You’ve been on an IV drip since you got out of surgery, but it’s been over a day now, so you should be good. Do you still feel sore?”
“Not as much…”
“Good. Then I’ll get you some food. Try not to go back to sleep, but it’s okay if you do.”
    You stepped away and Jeno took the chance to stretch a bit. He was feeling better, although he had lingering pain all around. He managed to sit up, looking around the room. It was still the same, but it felt different now. When he first came here he was terminally ill, having agreed to this experiment because of the possibility of saving his life. He wasn’t entirely confident about that, but a slim chance was a chance nonetheless for him. He had always thought he’d die in this room, but given his condition now, he was starting to believe he might actually make it out alive.
“Oh, you got up. You are doing better.”
“I feel better.”
“That’s good.”
    You put the food tray down on the table and rolled it in front of Jeno. He seemed a little stiff in his movements, so you helped him out.
“Thank you…”
“No problem. After eating we can start running tests if you’re up for it.”
“What kind of tests?”
“Nothing scary. We just wanna take some DNA samples, and run that against your older samples to see how you’ve changed. We also need to test your senses as well.”
“My senses?”
“That’s what this whole thing is about. I’m actually wearing some perfume that is technically scented, but the human nose wouldn’t be able to tell.”
“But I could… right…”
“In theory, that’s what we’re testing for, to see if DNA splicing can save lives, perhaps even improve them.”
“Well it saved mine. Even if I’m sore, and feeling strange, I feel way better than when I was sick before. I’m healthy… I haven’t felt that way in years.”
“Really?”
“Yeah… so thank you…”
“Oh no, please, I should be thanking you. Without you volunteering for this… well this research wouldn’t be going anywhere.”
“I guess we’re both grateful.”
    Once Jeno finished eating, finishing all his plates, you helped him into a wheelchair and took him to the lab. He took in everything with new eyes, having not been out of his room before. The place looked like a hospital too, but way more white and way less people. He didn’t really see anyone else, and the trip to the lab was rather short. You helped him up to the examination table, making sure he was comfortable before you started taking samples. You started by swabbing his mouth and giving him a basic check up before drawing blood. He seemed a little squeamish around needles, looking away as you got what you needed.
“You’re doing so well.”
“Thanks…”
    Jeno never really heard back about the test results, or really told much about what they were testing for. He was technically a lab rat, so it made sense. He was just happy to be alive. More so once he was able to stand on his own. From there the tests changed up a bit, the doctors checking on his stamina and physical abilities. He found that he was doing more than he could before, and that brought him immense joy. Although these weren’t the only changes he was experiencing.
“… apples…”
“Huh?”
“You smell like apples…”
    Jeno had been in the middle of a meal when he suddenly caught the scent of apples. There was nothing in his meal that was related to apples, and you had been quietly looking over some things. Yet the more he had taken in the scent, he realized he was coming from you. When he mentioned it you looked up with astonishment.
“I do?”
“Yeah…”
“Wow, your sense of smell is incredible! That’s correct.”
“It is?”
“Yes. Remember I told you I was wearing perfume that the human nose couldn’t smell. Your senses must be improving!”
“Are they…”
“This is great! We should start testing your other senses too.”
    Jeno didn’t know what kind of tests you meant, but he was eager to participate. He was starting to feel like he was freeloading, especially as the doctors weren’t taking as many samples as before. He followed you to another area, coming into a completely white room. He sat down and you went over to a table, grabbing some boxes. They were also white with a few holes at the top, and you placed them down before him.
“Can you tell me what’s inside each one? By smell alone.”
“I’ll try.”
    Jeno picked up each box, taking in a deep breath. He did so multiple times with each before giving an answer. You eagerly clapped as he got each one correct.
“You’re incredible!”
“Thank you…”
“I have a few more for you to try. Is that alright?”
“Yeah.”
    Jeno got better at using his sense of smell, being able to tell immediately with a small whiff. He loved seeing the look in your eyes as he answered correctly. You were so proud of him, and he wanted to make you happy. After testing his sense of smell, you moved on to his hearing. Of course just cause one sense was developing beyond human capabilities it doesn’t mean the others were too. You assured Jeno that it was alright if things didn’t go well with this test.
    You brought over a small device with a dial on it, explaining it emitted frequencies, and you could increase the pitch with the dial. He understood, and with that you began. At first it was a level that humans could hear. You confirmed with Jeno that you both could hear it, and from there you began to raise it up. At each level you’d ask him if he still heard the noise, and then you’d tell him you could as well. He didn’t know when things were supposed to change, but he was quite amazed himself. To him nothing really changed, but upon learning that you could no longer hear what he could, he was in shock.
“You… you seriously can’t hear it?”
“No. Although, we have to keep going as this isn’t really proof of your increased hearing. Are you ready?”
“Yeah.”
    You continued raising the level, glad to see Jeno was getting excited with his own abilities. As you went higher and higher you were certain his hearing had improved, although there was really one solid way to prove things.
“Jeno.”
“Hm?”
“I’m sorry.”
“What-”
    You raised the dial up to a specific setting and Jeno immediately covered his ears. He wound up on the floor, whimpering.
“Make… make it…”
“Sorry.”
    You quickly turned off the device and went over to Jeno. You let him rest his head in your lap as you gently pet him, trying to sooth him.
“I’m sorry, I’m really sorry.”
“Why… what…”
“That frequency can only be heard by dogs and… well I had to be sure…”
“Dogs?”
“I know we never really told you, but your DNA was spliced with that of a wolf.”
“A… a wolf…”
“Yeah. We wanted to use a strong creature, with incredible abilities. So far, you are living up to expectations. I’m really sorry though.”
“I’m fine…”
“Anyway, that’s enough for today. Let’s get you back to your room.”
“Can we just stay like this… for a little bit longer…”
“Sure.”
    You kept Jeno in your lap for a while, letting him relax and calm down after the events that led him to the floor. You didn’t say anything until your phone chimed, reminding you that you had elsewhere to be. You politely told Jeno it was time to get back to his room, he whined a bit but got up and followed you back. You told him his food would be brought over shortly, and they’d continue his tests tomorrow. It was like torture for Jeno to wait, but he found ways to keep, trying to figure out what else about his body was different. Although besides his hearing and sense of smell he wasn’t entirely sure. So he decided to get some sleep, knowing he’d get more answers tomorrow, and he’d get to see you again.
“Morning, Jeno. How are we feeling today?”
“Good. You smell like flowers.”
“Oh, very good. So breakfast is gonna be a bit different today, so can you come with me?”
“Sure.”
    Jeno was very curious what you meant, but he’d wait and see. You led him to another white room, having him sit down.
“So, we wanna see how good your sense of taste is.”
“Taste?”
“All your senses should be heightened now, in theory, so we’re checking that. We’re gonna blind fold you, and cover your nose. Don’t worry I’ll be feeding you, and you just tell me what it is you’re eating.”
“That sounds kind of funny, but alright.”
“Good. We’ll get started.”
    Jeno sat still as you blindfolded him and covered his nose. You gave his hand a reassuring squeeze and you went over to get the plates. You always made sure Jeno knew you were there with him, keeping one hand on top of his as you fed him. He’d take his time trying to figure out what he was eating, hearing the happiness in your voice when he got it right.
“You’re doing great. So I suppose you want to eat normally now.” You took the blindfold off, as well as the cover on his nose. “There you go.”
“Aren’t you gonna eat?”
“Huh?”
“You never eat with me.”
“Ah, I have a light breakfast, and I don’t eat lunch until later.”
“Here.” Jeno held up some food for you. “I wanna make sure you eat.”
“You’re so sweet.”
    You ate a bit, telling him that he needed it more than you, and you’d eat plenty later. He finished everything up and then followed you to another room. It was the same as the others but the layout was actually familiar.
“This is…”
“Yeah. Your last test is a simple eye exam.”
“Last test?”
“Then we can move on to the next phase.”
“What’s that?”
“You’ll see, nothing scary. Now, please tell me what letter I’m pointing at as we go.”
    Jeno was wondering what this next phase was, but he also focused on his test. He was glad there was something more for him, and that kept him mostly occupied that he didn’t realize how well he was doing. You mentioned his vision had improved, as his score this time was higher than when he first arrived. From there the test was switched up to see how good his vision was in the darker, and it was definitely better than the average person. These tests were all for today and he was returned to his room. Now he just had to wait for whatever that next phase was, and he’d be waiting until tomorrow.
🖤
“Let’s start with introductions, who wants to go first?”
    Jeno was excited to see what this next phase was, but he certainly wasn’t expecting what he got. Another doctor came to escort him to what seemed like a recreational room. He took everything in and looked around, seeing the games and things to do. Although before he touched anything he heard the door open, excited to see you, but the person who entered wasn’t you, but another boy. He was annoyed for a moment before he caught their scent, suddenly confused by it. 
    The two stared at each other for a while, quietly stepping to the side, and then the door opened. They both looked to see who entered, and it was another boy. The same routine happened until five of them stood in the room, high tension in the air. It wasn’t until you entered that things got less hostile. Although Jeno quickly noticed that the others recognized you as well, and he didn’t like that. You hadn’t noticed anything off and had them all pull up a chair and sit down in a circle, asking them to introduce themselves.
“Uh… I’m Jisung.”
“Hi, I’m Chenle.”
“Renjun.”
“I’m Jaemin.”
    The last to speak was Jeno, who was just glaring at everyone else. Specifically at Jaemin who sat at your other side. He didn’t snap out of it until you placed your hand on his leg, encouraging him to participate.
“I’m… I’m Jeno…”
You smiled at him. “Good, I’m glad you’re all finally getting to know each other. I’d like to start by thanking you all for participating in my research, I know I asked… a lot of you.”
“They’re like… me?” Jeno questioned. “All of them?”
“Of course. At this point you’ve all settled nicely into the changes, and I want you all to get to know each other. You’re all special and unique, and I don’t want you feeling alone. I know you’ve all been kept in your rooms all day, so I’m hoping you can get comfortable in this space. Eventually I’d like to move you into a shared dorm space, but I want you all to get along first.”
    Jeno understood what you meant, although he was still weary of the others. The room had plenty of things for them to do to break the ice, and you were there to help start conversations. Although Jeno stuck close to you, seeming shy to the rest. The first few days you actually joined them, but eventually you stopped coming. It was upsetting, but they all understood you had other things to do. Although Jeno didn’t really like being without you. Now that he was supposed to be socializing with others, he didn’t see you anymore.
“Jeno, let’s play this game together.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Come on, please, it looks like fun.”
“I said no.”
“Please, you’re supposed to-”
“Get away from me!”
🖤
“He did what?”
    After a week of watching the boys getting along you felt that you could remove yourself from the situation and let them grow together. Besides, the next phase was important and you couldn’t be as involved. Not to mention you had so many reports and data to look over. You thought things were going well until you were told Jeno had been put into solitaire with restraints. Apparently he attacked one of the others.
“Jeno, what happened?”
    It was heartbreaking to find Jeno sitting on the floor in the empty room. His hands were cuffed together and resting in his lap. When he saw you he perked up, and you could see the sadness in his eyes. You grabbed his hands, seeing what had only been told to you, and you were in disbelief, Jeno had claws.
“I’m sorry… I didn’t…”
“You have claws… you actually have claws…”
“Is that… is that bad?”
“No, no, in theory this is possible. We did splice your genes, but I wasn’t sure it would happen. None of the others have developed anything else.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt… anyone…”
“I know, I know, but what happened? Why did you get upset?”
“Jaemin was just nagging and I just… I got upset with him…”
“A strong build up of emotion… that makes sense… we’re gonna need to run some more tests on you now.”
“Okay…”
    Of course the rest of the facility wasn’t going to remove the restraints, but Jeno didn’t seem to mind. He was worried about himself too, staring down at his hands whenever he could. It felt surreal, almost like this was a dream, but every time he saw you he was reminded that wasn’t the case. You were too perfect in real life, he could never recreate you in his dreams.
“Everything seems normal, although your genes have certainly… mutated…”
“Is that bad?”
“No. Once again, this was theoretical, meaning possible. I’m honestly just amazed. As for Jaemin, he’s gettin treatment. He’s not hurt so bad, so don’t worry about him too much.”
“Okay.”
“Although you are going to be kept from the others until you have better control over yourself.”
“I understand.”
“We’ll try to figure this out, alright, don’t worry.”
“Thank you.”
    The restraints were taken off when Jeno was in his room, and you assured the others you’d be alright with him. You tried breathing exercises, figuring his emotions were important to being able to control himself. He got the hang of it after a while, and he was very happy to see your proud face again. It was just great to see you again, although he couldn’t stand knowing others like him saw you too.
“Y/n!”
    Whenever you came by Jeno hugged you tight, he had to, nuzzling your neck and doing his best to get the scents of others off you. 
“And how are we doing today?”
“I’m good. I don’t feel too different than before. The claws are just… another part of me.”
“I’m glad to hear. I think it’s about time to let you go back with the others. They’re already sharing rooms and-”
“No. I don’t want to.”
“Huh? But Jeno, it’s important to socialize and build-”
“I just want you. Ever since I met the others you’ve gone away.”
“I have a lot to do with my research so I can-”
“It’s not fair! You were always around before, when I was sick, and now that I’m better you’re gone. You should be with me more often now! I can do things I couldn’t before and-”
“Jeno, please calm down. You’re not my sole responsibility and I have to look after the others.”
“No!”
“This isn’t something that’s up for debate. If you’re gonna keep acting like this then maybe-”
    Jeno suddenly hugged you tight, nuzzling your neck. On other occasions you’d find this sweet and endearing, but not right now. You tried to free yourself but only wound up with your back to Jeno, he held you tight.
“Let go, I’m not in the mood.”
“I hate when you smell like others.”
“Jeno-”
“Please, just stay with me.”
“That’s not how this works.”
“You have to!”
    You tried again to get out of his grasp, but he didn’t budge. As you continued to struggle you wound up on the floor, lying atop a blanket. Jeno pinned your hands above your head, breathing in your scent as you continued to squirm.
“Jeno, stop it.”
“Just let me have you… that’s all I want…”
“Jeno!”
    He let go of your hands, and you immediately tried to get him off you, but he barely moved. His hands trailed down your body, slipping under your shirt and tugging it up. You immediately grabbed his hands to stop him.
“Jeno, what are you doing?”
“I said I want you…”
“No, no, wait-”
     Jeno moved his hands with ease despite your efforts to stop him. Although he didn’t try to take your shirt off, instead tearing it in half, exposing your chest to him. You tried to cover yourself, but he grabbed your hands and pinned them above your head again.
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Wa…”
    You suddenly felt something sharp against your skin, realizing Jeno had his claws out. He was clearly losing control of himself in this state, and you were powerless to stop him.
“Jeno, if you-”
    His lips were suddenly against yours, kissing you hard. You didn’t kiss back, once again trying to break free of him. You knew security would probably see the camera footage of the room soon and come in to stop this. You didn’t want Jeno getting hurt, but he wasn’t listening. His lips trailed down your body, and he gently nuzzled your bra up, exposing your breasts. He kissed each one before taking a nipple into his mouth, sucking and tugging at it. His actions sent a shiver down your spine, and you hated yourself for responding to this.
”Jeno, cut it out. I don’t want-”
    He was so lost in his own head that his grip loosened enough to flip you over onto your back, tugging down your pants, and properly unhooking your bra, leaving you completely exposed. He kissed down your back for a moment before flipping you around again. You could see he was completely naked now too, and the look in his eyes made you nervous. Before you could say anything he was kissing you again, his hands trailing down your body. At this point you knew very well you weren’t going to get him off you, not until he was distracted. Although you were the one not paying attention until Jeno had his hands on your thighs and pushed them apart, startling you.
“Jeno!”
“Sh, I got you.”
    Even in this state he knew very well his hands wouldn’t be good, but his mouth was another story. When you felt his tongue slide against your core, you threw your head back, instinctively trying to close your legs but Jeno held them tightly in place. You ran your hands through his hair, lost in the feeling for a moment before yanking his head back. You could see the shine on his lips, and he gave you a big smile.
“Fuck… Jeno, stop it.”
“But you like it.”
    Jeno dove back in, and you couldn’t help the moan that escaped your lips. You still felt some embarrassment though, aware there was a camera capturing all this. Yet you couldn’t do anything, and the will to fight was dying down as this foreign feeling of bliss overtook you. Jeno might not have any experience with eating someone out, but he was doing great as far as you were concerned. Although he was getting impatient, suddenly pulling away from you and making you whimper. You covered your mouth, trying to remind yourself this wasn’t something you should be enjoying.
“I’m going to make you feel so good.”
“Wait!”
    You screamed from the initial stretch, Jeno pushing himself all the way in with one swift motion. It was only a moment before you settled, the pain starting to shift to pleasure. It felt good, he felt good, and then he started moving. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, your mouth hanging open in silent bliss. Jeno’s pace was relentless, tears stinging your eyes. When you had some sense of self you covered your mouth, but Jeno pulled it away, kissing at your neck and whispering in your ear.
“I wanna hear everything.”
    You couldn’t control yourself anymore, wanting more of him, of everything. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him into a kiss as you moaned into his mouth. He took that as permission to kiss you deeper, getting rougher in his movements as well. Your hands would trail up and down his body, running your fingers through his hair, not even sure what to do with yourself anymore besides letting him take control. Amidst his movements he managed to pull you up, having you in his arms, resting on his lap as he thrust up into you. His lips trailed down your chest, staring to leave bruises as he went feral. 
    No matter how gentle he’d try to be, his own hands would trail along your back, his claws nicking your skin. You’d groan from the sting, but that was quickly drowned out by the way he was making you feel. Your body was burning up from pain and pleasure, your vision a blur. Something was building in you and it was causing you to shake. You were whimpering Jeno’s name, out of breath and trying to say something about how you were feeling, but surely he was getting the message. He was starting to lose his own rhythm, and you knew he was close, which you could only assume was the same thing happening to you as well.
“Jeno…”
    Even with mixed emotions you were aware of the burning pain in your shoulder. Vaguely able to take in Jeno biting you as you felt something warm filling you up and dripping down your legs. All those feelings pushed you over the edge, making you feel even more pleasure, which you didn’t think was possible. Your own body shook, wrapping your arms tightly around Jeno, your own walls squeezing his cock, wanting everything he could give. The only noise you could make was a whimper, sounding and feeling so helpless against him. As you both came down from your high, holding each other, your bodies twitching, and out of breath, Jeno gently pulled you back.
    Your vision was hazy, but you could see red on his lips, remembering the sting on your shoulder. Although you were curious, reaching over to Jeno’s lips, seeing and feeling his fangs. Going by the look on his face you knew he felt guilty over his actions. You were going to say something when you began to feel something between your legs. Jeno wasn’t moving, but something was happening. It wasn’t until he tried moving that you realized and put your hands on his shoulders, shaking your head as you adjusted to this feeling. You took some deep breaths, trying not to get lost in your own head again.
“Y/n? Are you… are you okay?”
“Yeah… yeah, just… how… how… are you?”
“I feel weird… I don’t know why but-”
“No, don’t move… don’t…”
“Y/n…”
“You… you have a knot…”
“What?”
“It’s a wolf thing… a breeding thing…”
“What?! I didn’t mean-”
“Stop, stop, don’t move, please. I’m fine… you have no control over this… and just… it’ll go down… fuck, this explains a lot…”
“I… I’m sorry… I don’t really know what came over me…”
“I have some ideas… just… deep breaths…”
    Jeno whined and gently nuzzled your neck, avoiding your injury. You merely rubbed his back, trying not to move or think about what just happened. Your eyes lingered over to the camera, glaring, things shouldn’t have gotten this far, you shouldn’t be here, so you had a lot of questions. Although now that things had calmed down you could feel all your injuries throbbing and the aches were certainly overwhelming. Your eyelids felt heavier, and you could tell you were on the verge of passing out.
“Jeno… be… be good…”
“What?”
    You couldn’t really say much else, but you hoped he’d be alright. Jeno was panicking, moving around, getting a whimper out of you, but you didn’t have the energy to calm him down anymore. You closed your eyes and let the darkness take you under.
🖤
    You groaned as you regained consciousness, feeling fatigue and soreness all over your body. Despite the pain you still opened your eyes and tried to sit up, but that simple movement caused you too much pain and you collapsed back down. That also made you scream, suddenly remembering your back was all scratched up. You managed to get on your side, taking a few deep breaths and trying to remember what happened. Your injuries certainly helped in that regards, and once it all came back your concern was suddenly on Jeno. As you tried to get up again a coworker entered, seeing that you were awake.
“Y/n, you’re awake!”
“Jai…”
    They rushed over to your side, checking your vitals from the monitors. Although they made sure you did move around too much.
“How do you feel?”
“Sore… but I’m alright, what about Jeno? Is he okay?”
“He’s fine, you’re the priority. What happened?”
“As if you don’t know.”
“I don’t, the higher ups took the video footage and classified it.”
“What?”
“All I know is that you were severely injured. Did that boy attack you?”
“Something like that.”
“How can you be so calm about this? You’ve been in and out of consciousness for two weeks.”
“Wait, what?”
“Look at yourself, you got seriously messed up.”
“I’m fine. Look, I need to talk to-”
    One of the doctors came into the room, glad to see you were awake. They gave you a run down of your injuries and how you were recovering. Although what you wanted more than that was to see Jeno.
“Is it possible to get out of bed and see Jeno? I understand-”
“You need rest.”
“I get that but Jeno-”
“It’s for your own good.”
    The doctor didn’t say much else as they added something into your IV bag. You thought to protest, but you could barely move, so there wasn’t much to do as your eyelids began to grow heavy. Jai made sure you laid back down and were comfortable, telling you not to worry, but you couldn’t help it. If anything, this brought up a lot of questions, but for now you’d just rest. When you woke up next you found yourself alone. You were groggy but had enough sense to remember not to move so much. Your body was still sore, but it wasn’t as bad as before, so that was a relief.
    As your mind cleared up, you remembered what happened last time. You had questions, but most of all you needed to check on Jeno and the others. Now that you were properly awake you carefully moved around, seeing that it wasn’t as bad as before. You sat up and moved towards the edge of the bed. It took a while for you to stand and hold yourself up, but once you had your footing you were confident you could walk. You pulled the needle out of your arm and disconnected all the monitors, getting into some slippers and heading out.
    After a few stumbling steps you regained proper stability. You still felt all the aches but you had a mission. Others gave you some weird looks as you passed by, but you paid them no attention. You made your way over to Jeno’s room, only to find it completely empty, as if it was never occupied. He was probably still in solitary confinement after what he did. That was two weeks ago, and you were fine, so this seemed ridiculous. Before going to Jeno you figured you’d check in with the other boys, unsure how they had taken the whole situation. When you got to their little dorm you found it empty, just like Jeno’s, and now you were panicking.
“There you are.” Jai ran up to you. “We’ve been looking for you.”
“Where are they?!”
“What?”
“The boys! Jeno, all of them!”
“You need to calm down, and get back to bed. You’re nowhere near-”
“Give me that.”
    You took the table Jai had, staring to walk away as you looked up Jeno’s profile to see where he was. As you figured he was in solitaire, but when you looked up Jaemin, you saw the same thing. You knew Jeno had been having issues, but the others were so well behaved. You somehow started running, ignoring Jai as she tried to stop you. When you came to solitaire you found that all the boys were actually gathered in the observation room, and the sight before you was horrifying. When Jai got to your side you took her ID card and opened the door, rushing in.
“What did they do to you!”
    You were heartbroken as you walked in, all of them looking up at you and trying to get close, but they had very little room to move. They were all bloody and dirty, chained to the wall. You could see they all had claws and fangs present, which just brought up more questions. You went over to Jeno, grabbing his face. He whimpered and nuzzled your hand. Gently reaching over to try and hug you, feeling better just having you close.
“What happened?”
“I hurt you…”
“Weeks ago, why are you here? Why are the others here?”
“I don’t know…”
“Why are you hurt? Have they been hurting you?”
“I-”
    Jeno whimpered when the door opened, and they all moved back a bit, but he kept an arm around your waist. You looked over to see a familiar face, your private benefactor, Doctor Morgan. Despite Jeno’s protest you got up.
“Doctor Morgan, what are you doing here?”
“What are you doing out of bed?”
“What?”
“You suffered severely at the hands of one of these creatures, you should be in bed for another week at least.”
“Creatures? Excuse me? Why are they even here?! What the hell have you been doing while I was recovering?!”
“My job.”
“Your job? Morgan we-”
“Doctor.”
“I told you my research is not for this!”
“These creatures say otherwise. Claws, and fangs, didn’t you tell me this was all a theory?”
“It was possible, and you saw the signs in Jeno but-”
“The others just needed a proper push to develop their abilities.”
“No! My research is meant to save lives, to better them, not turn people into living weapons!”
“You’re missing out on the potential.”
“What did you do to them! They’re innocent-”
    Amidst your shouting you had started walking towards Morgan. Jeno reached over to stop you, but he couldn’t. You were furious over what he had been doing, and he thought to shut you up by slapping you. The hit and the shook of it all knocked you to the ground, reminding you of your actual injuries, and it practically paralyzed you.
“You’re in no condition to be making any kind of decisions.”
“Is that why you left me there? Jeno wasn’t in his right mind, I could have died!”
“You seemed to be enjoying yourself.”
“Fuck you!”
    You tried to get up to retaliate, but your legs gave out on you. The adrenaline you had to find the boys had all been spent. Morgan chuckled and knelt down, grabbing your chin. All the boys started growling, making him laugh again.
“They like you a lot. I should probably use that.”
“Get your hands off her!”
    Jeno roared, yanking on his chains without a care for his own. The others did the same, and you knew someone was gonna hurt, you just didn’t know it. Somehow Jeno broke his chains, immediately lunging at Morgan and ripping into him. You were frozen in shock for a moment, the screaming slowly deafening you, until you snapped out of it. You tried to crawl to Jeno, but the others had freed themselves as well, Renjun carefully holding you back.
“Jeno! Stop it!”
    You may have been left before, but there was no way that would be the case for Morgan. Moments later guards came in, and the other boys came to life. They growled and attacked. A part of you was relieved they weren’t using live rounds, but you knew this wasn’t going to go well. You screamed at them to stop, but they weren’t listening, and you didn’t have the strength to move either. You looked away from the scene, already feeling nauseous from the smell. Your eyes were shut tight, and slowly things got deadly quiet. It was only for a moment as the sirens started going off, meaning the facility was in a state of emergency. 
    You opened your eyes to see the boys scurrying out of the room, followed by more screams. You couldn’t imagine what they were doing, but you had to stop them. You managed the strength to stand, but just as you got to the door it slammed in your face and locked you in. You saw Jeno on the other side, holding Jai’s ID, which you had dropped as soon as you had opened the door before. You slammed your fist against the window.
“Jeno! Open this door right now!”
“We’ll be back.”
“JENO!”
    You kept screaming, but he left you trapped. After spending all your energy you collapsed to the floor, hugging your knees to your chest. You had no idea how things had gotten like this, but you felt guilty. Your eyes lingered over to Morgan’s body. If you hadn’t been desperate to move further with your research you wouldn’t have accepted his funding. You knew he had ulterior motives about your work, but you just wanted something to go your way for once. Now you weren’t so sure your decisions were worth it.
    You stayed in place, unsure of how much time passed until the door opened again. You slowly looked at Jeno and the others. They were bloody, and yet they had smiles on their faces. Jeno and Jaemin helped you to your feet, keeping you between them and practically dragging you along with them. Bodies were littered everywhere, and you couldn’t believe what had become of them. You could still remember watching them in the rec room, playing and getting along, acting like normal people. Yet whatever had been done to them in your absence really brought out another side of them.
    You weren’t paying attention to where they were taking you, only vaguely aware that they somehow got to the garage and got you into a car. You wound up in the middle seats with Jeno, Renjun behind the wheel with Jaemin in shotgun, and the other two in the back. Your mind was still processing your fault in all this, and the situation they had created. While you were lost in thought Jeno kept a hold of your hand, you hadn’t even realized his claws and fangs were gone, for all of them in fact. They were just chatting away as if nothing was wrong.
“Hyung, can we get ice cream?” Jisung asked. “I can’t remember when was the last time I had some.”
“I like that idea.” Jaemin added. “But we can’t just got into a store like this, we need to get dressed.”
“Where are we even going?” Chenle questioned. “I don’t even know where we are actually.”
“I don’t know.” Renjun said. “I’m just driving.”
“The car has a GPS.” Jaemin stated. “Let’s use that. We can go-”
“No…” 
    Even if you weren’t paying attention, you were listening and processing their words in the back of your mind. Despite everything you needed to focus on the current situation, which was taking care of these boys. They were filthy, and dangerous, you needed to clean them up and get them somewhere safe so you could come up with a proper solution.
“We need to get some things…”
    You leaned forward and put your address into the GPS, telling Renjun to follow that and drive safely so as to not attract attention. Now seeing that you were okay, somewhat, Jeno nuzzled your neck again, placing soft kisses on your exposed skin. The drive was uneventful, and they were all very excited to see your place. You got your spare key and ushered them into the house. You told them where to go to shower while you looked through your closet for spare clothes and set them out while you gathered somethings into a bag. Even if you seemed put together you were running on autopilot.
    You just needed to change clothes and wash up a bit. You turned off your cameras and deleted all the recent footage. Once you were good to go you had the boys come with you to your spare car, turning off the GPS and any sort of tracking system before giving Renjun directions. They whined and asked where they were going, but you merely told them it was a safe place. The drive was rather long, but thankfully it was uneventful as well. You came to a cabin home, quite far and isolated from civilization. The boys were all happy to be there, and once you settled them in, everything came crashing down.
“I need to be alone…”
    You tried to go off by yourself but Jeno followed, and so did the others. They didn’t want to leave you alone at all.
“Go away.”
“We can’t do that.” Jeno said. “We have to make sure you’re okay.”
“I’m fine! Please, I need to think.”
“About what?” Jaemin asked. “We can help.”
“No, no, you can’t.”
“But-”
“Since when do you all get along? Since when can you all suddenly agree to commit countless atrocities without batting an eye? Are you even sorry? Do you understand what you did?”
“We protected you.” Jeno stated. “I protected you.”
“From what? I was fine. What happened-”
“Isn’t this what you wanted?”
“What?”
“It’s why you wanted us to socialize…” Renjun mumbled. “So we’d develop a pack dynamic… so we’d have each other, right?”
“I… yes… but to-”
“Aren’t you happy?”
“How can I process that after what you did? The police are going to find out and-”
“But your project isn’t government sanctioned. We don’t technically exist.”
“I… who-”
“Doctor Morgan told us.” Jeno said. “On record we died, your project doesn’t exist, we don’t exist. While you were gone… he tortured us to get our animal side out… to see what we could do…”
“I’m sorry… I didn’t know… I didn’t want any of this to happen, I never-”
“It’s okay.” Jeno pulled you into a hug. “Because of all that we got stronger, so we could protect you and the pup.”
“Pup?” You pulled away. “What are you…”
    Even if you knew what had happened with Jeno, the consequences didn’t hit you until now. You looked down at your belly for a moment and then started shaking your head.
“No, no, I need-”
“We can all smell it.” Jaemin said. “We all know.”
“Is that why you got so defensive when Morgan hit me? Cause you knew…”
“He hurt a member of our pack! We couldn’t-”
“You killed him! That is not how you deal with something like that!”
“You’re safe now. That’s what matters.”
“No, no, you’re all… I don’t know what you think-”
“We’re protecting the pack.” Jeno stated. “And you’re mine, so we’re all going to protect you.”
“I see you became the alpha…”
“Yes.”
“Then listen to me. What you did has consequences, and I need to figure out what to do.”
“You brought us here, we should be safe. No one would really know about us.”
“They’ll find out!” You took a breath. “I need to make some calls…”
“To who? Why?”
“To fix this!”
“How?”
“I’m going to need to make a deal… in exchange for your safety… my research…”
“You want to put us in a lab again!” Jisung yelled. “No way!”
“What choice do I have? If not, you’re going to be hunted, or killed, like rabid animals.”
“What about you? And the pup?”
“Huh?”
“You want us to go back to being lab rats.” Chenle said. “When they realize you’re pregnant they’ll treat you the same too.” 
“I…”
“We’ll just disappear.” Jeno took your hand. “All of us. We’ll start over, that’s what we’ll do.”
“No… no, you can’t run from-”
    Jeno kissed you, shoving you back until he had you pinned to a wall. He kept you trapped, pressing a soft kiss to your head.
“I have to protect you, both of you.”
“Jeno-”
“I’m the alpha, what I say goes.”
“I’m not a wolf like you, that doesn’t work on me.”
“Then we’ll just keep you safe, even from yourself.”
“What…”
“Let’s fine a comfortable room for y/n.”
    Jeno grabbed your wrist and pulled you along, looking for a comfortable place. Of course he found a room without windows, sitting you down in bed. You were glaring at him, but he didn’t seem to mind.
“I get you’re upset, but this is for your own good. You’ve taken such good care of us, now we’re gonna return the favor.”
“They will find us Jeno.”
“I’ll protect you.”
    He kept saying the same things, and you knew there was no reasoning with him anymore. He wasn’t the same Jeno you knew, far from the boy you had met at the hospital months ago. He wasn’t really human anymore, so there was no way to know what was going through his head. Was he acting like this because he cared, or maybe it was all instinct now given your situation. He wouldn’t hurt, but you didn’t need to test your luck. You knew how things would go when you got found, so you’d have to prepare for that. All you could do now was behave and study them some more. This isn’t where you thought your research would go, but this was what you had created. You couldn’t run from them, from him, especially now. You put a hand over your belly, thinking that all you could do now was hope you weren’t swallowed whole. And even that was a big ask.
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veliseraptor · 2 years
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HI just wanted to comment on something i see frequently in your writing! A recurring motif ive noticed you like to use is like... xue yang waiting for something to hurt- expecting pain (usually physical) and either enduring it when it happens or being surprised when it doesnt. And i think that is just so chef kiss- i think xue yang as a character is on some level always waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for things to start hurting, ready to cut and run or lash out when they do, and i think that recurring motif of yours is just Extremely him and its always stuck with me when i reread your work. 10/10 thank u for giving me xue yang brain worms
you're welcome for the xue yang brain worms, just sharing my own when I don't have any more room for them in my own head. it's how I cope
anyway though I love when people like...specifically mention recurring Motifs they notice me playing with with a character, because I both worry that it's too obvious and also unclear at all times. but yeah!! this is definitely one of those where...I've talked before about how I think Xue Yang is very used to existing in a constantly precarious state.
Nothing is certain, nothing is stable, and his expectations of the people around him are in the basement. He pretty much lives by the expectation that he can't trust anybody else to look out for him except for him, and when they do it's always contingent and going to end eventually. I don't think Xue Yang was surprised to get kicked out of Jinlintai, however it happened; there was always an expiration date on that arrangement, from his perspective, and it was just going to be a matter of how and when it happened, and how well he could land when it did. He is very much always waiting for the other shoe to drop, because it's just a matter of time and he has to be ready when it happens.
(He wasn't ready when he was a kid, he didn't see it coming, but he's never making that mistake again. He will, in fact, bite first if it looks like there's something anywhere nearby that might possibly hurt him. Caught off guard once, death on the entire Chang Clan, caught off guard twice, that's just embarrassing.)
I also think a lot about how Xue Yang simultaneously spends all the time in anticipation of his own imminent death and carries himself with a certain attitude of invincibility and total indifference toward consequences. Bad shit's going to happen and eventually it will kill him but in the meantime he's going to live life like it won't.
Basically: pain and suffering is not just a fact of life but the rule; anything else is the exception.
And this is what kills me about two specific moments in the Yi City arc. The first is the one where Song Lan first calls Xue Yang's name, and the second is during the argument with Xiao Xingchen where Xue Yang tips from trying to get Xiao Xingchen to understand to on the attack. They're moments where I think it shows how much Xue Yang did relax during that period of time, and how much he at least...stopped being quite so ready for the flip side, and that's part of why it hits so hard when it does arrive, and part of why he goes after Xiao Xingchen as viciously as he does.
(Like I said, caught off guard twice...stupid, stupid mistake, and look what happened. Nobody's supposed to be able to hurt Xue Yang anymore but somehow Xiao Xingchen is doing it, and he should have known this was coming, when did he forget to watch for it?)
There's something too, though maybe this is also me reading forward in the MXTX extended universe, that looks at the way Xue Yang treats Xiao Xingchen in particular and wonders if he is, at least in some way, testing his hypothesis. I definitely think the way he goes after Xiao Xingchen isn't just about personal revenge; the way it's tailored is very specifically making a point about how Xue Yang's worldview is right and Xiao Xingchen's is wrong. Xiao Xingchen thinks he can alleviate suffering and make the world better; Xue Yang is here saying that there's no such thing.
anyway see related texts: xue yang's relationship with his body, xue yang, candy, and the mug metaphor
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rosewoodconch · 19 days
Text
RWCH Readathon 2024: Day 11
Undercover Princess - Chapter 32
Christmas came early!
Ollie is so right to be upset with Lottie.
Not only has be been awful at sending letters, but now shes not coming home for Christmas??? And i know i get it she has more important shit going on but cmon not even for a weekend? Does he not deserve that much?
'Your first and most loyal friend' is a stab to the fucking gut.
I've been that friend
its horrific knowing youre getting left behind.
But really the rules at rosewood about not being allowed to call anyone except for immediate family is really stupid, especially given her circumstances. Like mum is dead and dad might as well be. Ollie is the closest thing to family she really had.
The conch party is so iconic and this all makes me really happy so i'm taking a deep breath to remove my ollie upsetness (My girlfriend sitting on call watching me write this can a test) and i wanna be happy for this
Ani and Ellie is such a fun dynamic throughout all the books, but at this point the lil group of the 4 girlies (ani, Saskia, Lottie, and Ellie) is so funny to me because literally all of them have something they arent telling the others, then jamie and raph are just watching tiredly at the side while the stratus kids are being functional i love them
GUITAR OMG GUITAR GUITAR
yall i cannot explain the feeling of being 14 years old and starting to do guitar lessons at school because of this scene
Ellie having a crush on saskia is the most understandable part of all of these books.
🚨FIRST SASKIS THIGHS MENTION🚨
Lottie is so jealous already girl cmon if youre gonna be jealous be productive about it at least dont repress it
I also like ani and lottie bonding. I want more of the groups all pairing up but in the different combos
LET US ENTERTAIN YOU
please im begging you
YALL OH MY GOD
IM MY MARGINS OF MY BOOK IVE WRITTEN:
"Hypothesis that in book 5 ellie and jamie form a band called the runaway wolves"
IM NOT FAR OFF OH MY GOD IM LOWKEY PROUD OF MYSELF
anyway this was the precise moment i fell in love with jamie volk at 14 years old
The song is so beautiful and i really wish that maravish was a real language so we could hear the song, but honestly I kind of equate it to snaggletooths ep - specifically to the song Teenage Love Song (which is actually referenced later in the series)
Lottie sobbing is so real.
I wanna do a whole deep dive and project about all my favourite bits when the whole readathon is over so i'm making notes of my favourite bits to revisit and I guarantee this will be in the top 5.
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