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delicatebluebirdruins · 8 months

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Mia's nightmares

a/n some time working for the connections (going off the Kaitai Shinsho guide for it)

this is very self-indulgent, yes, the pictures where needed, yes, I wanted to touch on somethings but writing wise? I am rusty.

small playlist: You shine Carrie the musical; go tell aunt Rhody (both versions original and re7); I found amber run; someday and bullet proof by Godsmack (I wish I could have found acoustic versions); I’ll make it up to you by imagine dragons.

Information on how to handle missing people is really interesting and I included a bit of my research into this.

No beta reader we die like ethan must never die but a huge thank you. To @precambrian-sea-pancake for putting up with me through out all of this. I don’t have the words to describe how grateful I am for their help.

more notes in the tags

2010 March 1st Interview Day. When she went in, she was as prepared as she was going to be. The day was warm for March. The job was entry level with some traveling involved and some desk work. It would also be putting good in the world months of research told her that much... the interview went well and by the end of April she started work and for the few months she was on desk work, and it was normal. Routine. During that time fire drills were very rare and of course the outbreak drills were slightly fewer but still there and it startled them all every time. The implications behind it created a horrible combination of safety and terror that it could happen here in her place of work. After three of these outbreak drills it was decided that all desk workers got put into the combat training course for a few months after that was done, she and a few others were put into advanced combat. For the next few months, she could have sworn she was being followed but it’s a small world you're bound to run into people outside of professional (or educational) places, right? but she didn’t actually recognise the guy when she got a good look at him, it wasn’t from work she was sure of that much, but the recognition remains, and this just seemed to be deliberate...

date night few months later: she was always giddy to see Ethan and they'd been so busy of late. This time it was simple. A takeaway dinner from their favourite place and a walk in the park and they walked past the horse statue and sat next to the pond talking and keeping an eye on the bolder squirrels as they ate their food enjoying its warmth and, talking about everything and looking at the clouds shape. it was the most normal she felt in months. Neither noticed the people watching them.

2011 May after many more dates she and Ethan got married. it was joyful their friends and family there, the favourite photos of the shoot and the gift of the music box from Ethans grandmother was what made her cry. he told her about it how much it soothed him when he was younger and scared of the dark. throughout all of it they don't let go of each other’s hands. As the day slipped away the light flickered into gold and the last pictures of the day were done everyone went home and then so did, they.

2012 She was still being taught combat training and was improving with hand to hand, and her arms training was doing even better. As time went on, she was moved away from desk work and sent out and trained off site for a greater range of terrains like the beach at night (the running she had to do was killer) that specific trip took a few days to recover from. But it all meant she got stronger, and it meant less makeup and less bruises. less things to hide from Ethan (she didn't want to think of the times he grazed a bruise by accident, and she flinched. and how hurt he looked for it) considering the world she felt confident... it was only a matter of time till the next major outbreak shook the news. (And just as quickly the BSAA will take control and the information coming out will be cut off). As it was. The civil war in Edonia and rumors of something being used in combat situations. That fear was reflected on everyone she saw during those months.

Getting home and hearing the soft music playing put a smile on her face the first genuine one in months. approaching quietly, she dropped a kiss on Ethan's head as he played a song that she hadn't heard in a while. dimly remembering the lyrics, she sat next to him and sang softly "What a surprise, gazing into your eyes. I swear that I still get lost in the light. No photograph could possibly show. The you I know" and watched a smile grace his face as it always did when she joined him here, she was glad that he couldn't see her face as she remembered how that song and the story itself ended. Realising what was coming up she had an idea of what to get him.

As time went on her business trips were training of a different kind. She got sent with minimal warning (having to come up with a plausible reason for her leaving that got harder and harder) and a firm order of no personal items. So she also had to think of when to take off and stow her wedding ring she was already worried of losing it. The missions were always how to get items from a certain point to a specific destination unimportant things with different challenges thrown in to distract and horrify her. They did at first but then they didn't as much. On the occasions of people dying (both friend and enemy) her superiors always waved it off with fake blood and hired actors to play dead. That explanation worked for a while, but the nightmares and guilt remained. It wasn’t until she got told that she had completed the training and she was sent out on more serious missions. With real life and death stakes. That she had doubts about the first explanation during the training period there was no difference between the real and the faked. And she got better at seeing the potential pitfalls the traps and sometimes the violence turned her stomach, but she worked through it thinking she was working for the good guys. The trips put their own kind of strain on her relationship with Ethan because she couldn't tell him what she was transporting or anything else and seeing each other so rarely. They had more arguments then ever during this period.

Anniversary one (2012) she got Ethan a few sketchbooks as he was lamenting that he hadn’t had a chance to get any recently. It was simple but then so were they. Ethan had her grandfathers clock fixed. It was a big clock or particularly old but when she was a child she remembered Gappy winding it, remembered when the paint faded the time he spent taking care of it. Time and use had damaged it and it was not easily fixed. And she cried when she realised that she couldn’t fix it. So this meant so much to her.

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Jan 2014 was when she was approached and told she fit the criteria to be brought onto the E-000 project and the world shattered. Alan Droney (the director of the special operations division he introduced himself as) collected her and left outside the door. She went through the blood-soaked bed was out of place in the blinding white room she did not notice the black and the man crying in pain as he cradled what was left of his arm. and the child standing over him. and they all watched as the limb regrew and the sound of the sobbing and the horrible scratching of pen on paper as the stop watches they all had ticked on marking the time for this regrowth to take place, she knew these sights and sounds would follow her into sleep tonight.

snapping to attention as one of the researchers said her daughter was so powerful, wasn't she? the fanatical gleam was even more unsettling than the words somehow then the woman turned her attention turned and she approached the child. Eveline, they called her. they didn't say any names to the researchers they just referred to each other as elements on the periodic table (it felt more like an inside joke at times) the woman with the fanatical gleam was not called anything of the sort she was simply called Maică Superioară. Afterwards the researchers sat with and described what her role will be that the imprinting protocol will be started between her and Evie. With that bond Evie will trust her implicitly and listen to her the most. The pressure and the responsibility for it was immense. She would have an increase in pay. The display when she entered was part of a show. Put on to shock her. A small test for her mind. Another one when she thought about it. They mentioned briefly that there may be a time where she had to transport Evie but didn't elaborate and she wasn't given the chance to ask. Transporting a child, a bioweapon is hugely different then transporting old treasures. She hoped they would give her more training for that event. Listening to the sales pitch and thinking of all it will entail her thoughts cycled. This went from shadiness to beginning to descend into a cave from which there would be no leaving. She wasn’t sure of anything anymore like the companies’ goals anymore or their apparent desire to do good in the world.

She was lucky to get home when she did a week later as rifling through the post, she opened the plain envelope addressed to her and there were pictures of her and ethan in their house, on dates, with friends. the message was clear you are being watched and you know what will happen if he learns anything. Anything at all. She felt like an injured animal cornered by her own thoughts and his concern and love, so she walked out the door and he found her after a bit. the ticking got louder every time he asked what she was hiding from him every time he said she was lying to him... she was relieved at not having to answer as their phones rang but it wasn't over. it never was with Ethan, but he left it alone gave her space, but she could feel his eyes watching her and the feeling of being on a balancing beam that was getting more lopsided every second (she just did her best to avoid him for the next few months)

left to right: Manganese; Boron; Iridium.

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Coming back into work the next day the researchers mentioned the envelope repeating plainly to not tell anyone what she saw with Evie... she felt anxious more than she had ever been before here. There was no official paperwork to sign and there was a threat here. A threat that became all to, clear when weeks later and she and Evie were talking (all the while being watched) and being made to interact more and more when the child said, "you're nicer than the old one" and confused she looked down and the girl smiled and pointed at the wall of pictures the researchers put up (something you can see through the large window of Evie’s room) and in the middle one was of an older woman and Eveline moved her finger to another photo of a man and said that was her husband and then there was another photo of them being covered with mold. They were both turning into the monsters she was being trained to fight. the warning was clear. don't fuck this up.

Home time brought another ominous envelope feeling tense around her shoulders and neck she opened it and it was just bills. but the day was stressful and long and the tears spilled over and didn't stop until Ethan got home. he took in the situation and crouched in front of her gently taking the letter reading it and just understood it was the last straw of a long day. taking her hands and sitting next to her and just being for a bit. then they got supper ready simple and warming then went to bed.

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there were many times where she noticed how the researchers treated Evie. when she started Evie asked her many questions about her family (she mentioned bits but never any names) about the world at large she wondered why (it didn't last long) the other researchers treated her as a tool, to a certain extent Iridium and Manganese were the closest to treating her as a person, and she was never around for Evie's one on one conversations with Maică but knowing the woman she wished she was... Iridium had an ear worm and for weeks on repeat whistled the same song over and over again or worse sang it. Evie sometimes hummed (getting a smile from Iridium) along as well adding to the eeriness of the tune but she didn’t do it often. the lyrics she didn't think much of until they found her at sleep "go tell aunt Rhody old... gander is weeping because his wife is dead" always morphed into "when she’s done, he’ll be torn apart" when that happened, she always woke up always reached for Ethan before stopping as touching him would make him wake and she would have to come up with yet another lie.

She tried not to think how many have died at her own hands during the actual missions she was sent on and the people she heard die whilst she was learning about the d series (the screams and roars echoed) and what happened to them during the nights where that song was the accompaniment. Maică seemed to see her as a rival for Evie’s affections but during this training stage Mia and Evie hadn’t interacted a lot at all. And her looking in on the lessons especially about the ones that would neutralise Evie she always had a terrifying look on her face whenever she happened across these lessons. But the researchers insisted that these lessons were worst case scenario that Eveline was perfect. That there was hope for her looking at Eveline's stony expression Mia didn’t know what to say. The day after training she arrived and was going through the motions of arriving. Getting in putting her stuff in the locker assigned and wishing she had a lab coat as well because it was getting harder to explain to Ethan why she came home in different clothes that she left in. Exchanging a smile with Manganese they pushed through the door and heard the scream. A scream from Maică, and Maică was never anything but calm and distant. No one could think of a time where she had raised her voice let alone screamed. So, they all came running expecting carnage, but nothing was amiss, but Maică just seemed frustrated hugely so. Before anyone could ask anything, she knocked over a tray of syringes making them all jump and left. They didn't see her again for the next two days. Everything changed after that Maică was distant and angry and everyone who had to cross her path did so on eggshells and Evie just seemed hurt and wouldn't speak around anyone but Mia and even then, not like she used to.

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2014 Anniversary third: last years was missed entirely all money and effort were spent in mending their house that was damaged in a storm and they were just busy. But this year busy again but they did manage to get each other something needed as their originals were no longer salvageable Mia gave Ethan a new wallet and he gave her a travelling bag with little extras thrown in. His had a picture from their first date and an old penny that his mum found. It would seem silly to anyone else, but the coin is distinct and had a story behind it.

Home time was something dreaded especially on bad days with Evie. As the rates of accidental infections of the mold became unnervingly frequent. As it was not clear for her what the imprint would mean for her if she was infected... she dreaded bringing baggage home with her, she dreaded his eyes that watched her every move and the invisible axe over Ethan's head. She couldn't bear the sound of ticking now wondering how long it will be before this blew up. they started to bicker and argue. There were many times she felt the words explaining what her job entailed bubbling up and wanting to be shared with him to help them all. The threats were effective though and she felt she could deal with her problem as long as Ethan was safe. The dreams were getting worse. one night a bad one had Ethan screaming begging for something she couldn't hear, and she tried to get to him but couldn't. She was going through treacle and her hands felt sticky and wet looking down realising they were covered in blood. Ethan's blood. Waking she began to reach for Ethan but remembered the dream. She lay down again and turned away from him and waited for the morning.

She didn't want to sleep again that night. when she "woke up" Ethan had already left fixing herself a quick breakfast she noticed a piece of paper on the table and picked it and realised it was a doodle of the horse statue in the park seeing it inspired her. During her lunch break she went out and got a pad of paper and cheap colouring pencils after she smuggled those in once the days testing was done and she was certain they were not being watched. She sat with Evie, and they doodled together for the rest of the day. To start with Evie was content with just shapes and lines as any child would do but she got more confident and drew people as well. It was one of the most normal interactions Evie and Mia has ever had. After they were done Mia hid the pictures under Evie’s mattress and said goodbye to the girl. To Evie however this afternoon meant the world to her. The next few weeks after was terrible though. Manganese didn’t show up for work at all and the others seemed on edge. Mia was kept out of the loop as usual. Then one day he was brought into the lab handcuffed and bruised. Looking like he had been tortured. And shoved to the ground he faced his fate. As Maică and Boron told Evie to take control of him and she did. As they all watched he grabbed a knife and slashed himself repeatedly. All the while this was silent… Mia wanted to stop it, but she knew this mood. It had been all to frequent with Maică recently and her ire would turn on Mia herself if she said anything. It wasn’t until the next day when she heard the reasoning behind this display. He was merely suspected of giving secrets to the BSAA or someone else. They didn’t know for sure. They found something suspicious and jumped straight to executioner. It was something a long time coming.

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October 2014 you would think Maică announcing that was leaving soon would throw a spanner in everything but it stabilised things more than anything else. And considering recent events the loss of Manganese and Iridium being “fired” she felt nervous coming into work the next day. As she entered the head office area leading to the stairs Mia noticed boxes everywhere and people packing them up and moving. She was told that this part of the building was rented out to other businesses, so she thought nothing of it. Turns out they were all moving as Maică and Boron announced Evie would be moved under the care of her and Alan. they weren't told why or why there was only two of them she felt a little confident. She and Evie had a solid rapport, and she and Alan worked well together but still they’d not been in the field with just the two of them and a powerful child. If the powers that be weren't confident in her and especially Alan's (as her superior officer) abilities, they wouldn't be sent at all. Still the doubt and the dread remained. They were given a time and a place. They were to be given an envelope holding their specific orders that was not allowed to be opened until they got onto the tanker. the Annabelle... all she heard in her dreams that night was screaming.

Date night: she was nervous. Worried. She was going to tell Ethan she was leaving on a longer trip tonight and she’d noticed people following her on and off again. And she couldn’t tell who they were working for this time. She heard the rumors that the BSAA was investigating bioweapon manufacturing in the area. She had considered calling them. Many times. But anonymous or not Ethan would still be caught in the middle. Ethan would be in danger. And she couldn’t see it be more or less if she said nothing or something. Hands shaking as she applied makeup to dark circles, she considered Evie what would happen to her. Despite everything she cared for the girl. They were both monsters at this point (especially Mia herself isolating herself from her friends and to a lesser extent Ethan himself) and she wanted to scream at everyone that showed her kindness. She was not able to protect Evie from Maică and her cruel comments (she still did not know anything about the woman other than she used to see Evie as her daughter but there was more to it than that… there had to be).

Especially recent comments. Breathing in and out she finished off her makeup and wanted to get rid of the mask. All of them and a small hope that one day she could… She hoped when it came to it, she could help the BSAA and bring down the connections. Her help would be minimal she had a few names, few places but some knowledge is better than no knowledge… going that way was where madness lies. So, she put it in the overstuffed drawer of pain and horror and tried to ignore it… The café she was going to was nice and Ethan was handsome as ever. She felt like she hadn’t seen him for years so this was so nice. Especially when they left and shared headphones. Less nice was the first song that came on “Oh I'll use you as a warning sign. That if you talk enough sense, then you'll lose your mind.” The song felt very close to raw nerve endings. She was amazed that she didn’t recoil hearing that song. He took the news well as she told him on the way home and taking what felt like a risk told him a little about Evie and he was understandably very confused about the child she was also going to be looking after as well but she just told him it was her boss’s child, and the kid was going to a new boarding school in the same area as where her destination is (he was going to ask where that was but she cut him off. Taking him aback), and they didn’t want her travel on her own just yet. So, it was two birds one stone.

October 3rd Early Afternoon the group gathered together for a photo, and she felt out of place. Maică left not soon after and then they received the envelope and were sent home for last minute packing and so they did. She felt on edge and nervous as she checked her bag. Jumping when Ethan spoke from the doorway and asked (again) why she was lying to him. All she felt looking at him was a lump stopping her from speaking and the never-ending sound of ticking in her head. Even though this time she could actually be more truthful than usual. She said she wasn’t good enough for this trip. This time he only partially believed her… she could tell. In a change of pace Ethan offered to come with her and see her off at the dock. Her panic at Ethan and Evie meeting made her “no” too sharp, a tone she had never used on him, and the gutted feeling of watching Ethan flinch back from her was something she’d never forget. Picking up her wallet and ensuring her driver’s license was inside and putting it in her bag. Which she folded around and put it in the suitcase. As she did that Ethan noticed amongst her things there was nothing for a child in there. But dismissed assuming the kid would be having her own things with her. She backtracked and hoped her panic and fear was not obvious.

That he might come anyway all she said was good enough to make him stay home but not enough to wipe that wounded look off his face. And the sound of the car horn from her taxi prevented further words and there was only just enough time for her to press a kiss to his cheek. Before going outside and getting in the car. Losing sight of home and Ethan who was at the door by that point almost made her cry, but she couldn’t. At all. The last time she had really cried was getting the bills strangely putting that thought to the side she arrived at the dock and smelling the sea and the sounds of shouts and waves. Looking up at the tanker Mia felt miles away already floating in the sea. She hadn’t even left yet but she wanted to go home to talk to Ethan and be completely honest with him, but she was rooted to the ground with the fear of what could happen and of course the feeling of cold fingers on her arm and the tug on her sleeves made her look down at Evie who was looking up at her and then turned and looked at Alan who had his camera out. they stood together and she wondered if her discontent was obvious...

Getting into their quarters she eyed the open envelope that Alan had left for her to read as well. Picking it up with a sigh she began to read through it. It was not long but it still took a reread to understand their duties. She felt sick. Any confidence she had was gone. She had seen Evie take over people with her mold and how she made them act once infected and she felt nervous especially when focusing on that last point... what would make the mission that compromised? she supposed briefly that she would know what is considered to be "beyond reconciliation" when it happens but even then, she has seen Evie infect multiple people in a day, almost simultaneously. That had been her challenge the weeks after Manganese was executed infect multiple people at once. The next few nights she dreamed of screaming and blood and a horrible high-pitched giggle.

She woke up to a beautiful day and Alan and Evie weren't in their quarters... before she could worry, she noticed the note and only slightly relaxed she took the chance and went outside on deck sending a message to Ethan. Without thinking about her actions she pressed record. Something she did not usually do but considering her location and the oncoming storm she wanted it to get through. Starting off she was bright and happy how could she not? She was told her job here was almost done. The brightness dimmed a little as she caught sight of Evie and Alan, and she signed off after telling Ethan that her "babysitting" job would be over soon she brightened up again when she took the chance to say she loved him. She tried to ignore the feeling of foreboding that only got worse when she admitted her role in this was almost done to the camera just before stopping the recording.

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October 5th evening: when everything went wrong nobody else noticed (they would soon enough) to Mia it sounded like waves normal hustle and bustle the storm picking up as she passed a porthole carrying Alan. Evie’s giggle as she ran off. Trying to stem the rising panic getting to their quarters Alan pulled away and collapsed by the sofa. Coughing and weak. She sounded a lot calmer than she was feeling ignoring the panic at Alan’s infection and that she should have gone after Evie before tending to Alan. She crouched next to Alan. Stating the obvious “Alan you’re getting worse.” He admitted it was his fault Evie got out that she heard her own voice agree with him then everything rushed in and became clearer again when she promised Alan that she was not going to let him die and saw Alan reach out to her and felt the cool touch of the vial containing Evie's tissue samples with Alan saying, “you find her- you fix this”. She knew what it meant. Taking the vial, the situation was getting bad, but it could be worse. Fix this was echoing inside her head. She just had to get to Evie in time. So, turning to the door she searched for calm and finding it and the weight of her knife and handgun on her hip said with more confidence then she was feeling breathed in and said "Okay, Evie. Where are you ."

Leaving their quarters, she followed the codex to the kitchen finding the black vomit covering a good part of it cursing she reset the codex and updated Alan who stating the obvious said “this is getting out of hand” but she agreed because he was right. Going down to the bottom level fighting any molded she sees on the way. Going into the second engine room and hearing Evie’s voice from the shadows “are you mad at me mommy?” the response was automatic and truthful “no Evie I’m not mad” she wasn’t mad but as she spoke, she stuttered when the last word registered, and she felt wary and confused and wanted Evie to elaborate “wait what did you call me?” and with a pleading voice Evie continues with “I don’t want to live at the lab anymore. I want a house. And I want you to be my mommy” listening to Evie’s voice, Mia said something that she hoped would work “okay Evie I’ll be your mummy. come back with me right now.” It didn’t and Evie ran off again giggling with Mia’s over voice saying “Evie wait” as the Annabelles blaring sirens started up. Warning off the molded or the storm that was upon them? She thought. It was both. Leaving the engine room, she contacted Alan. “Did you find her?” Alan asked straight away her frustration was there “Yes but she ran off. she’s making more friends Alan; those things are everywhere.” More Coughing came from Alan. He did not sound good… he waved off her concern reminding her she has a job to do “you just worry about getting Eveline back.”

Making the trek back to their quarters to grab more ammo and check on Alan. Found Alan not there. Calling him lead nowhere there was no answer, and she left a message then she noticed the wall and the writing on it. It looked like blood all it said was “Evie’s upstairs.” Leaving going upstairs entering the corridor with Alan hunched over leaning against the wall (she only distantly noticed the open e Necrotoxin case near him). How did he get up here? She asked him that but all he said was “where’s Evie” updating him that Evie’s condition was deteriorating. All he said was “good thing I’m already dying” feeling desperate she pleads, not quite grasping how futile it was “don’t say that.”

A look comes over Alan’s face she hasn’t seen before or how to describe it really as he says "She trusts you. That little bitch, she never—” Getting up moving away from her spinning side to side looking at something she cannot see he begs “No, Evie, I—Evie—I didn't mean to call you that, Evie." Realising what was happening she spoke as clearly as possible “Alan, listen! She's trying to take control. You have to fight her”.

But it was too late, and he started to scream as the mold appeared on his body seeping through skin and clothes and vomiting it up. As he looked back up Mia turned her attention to Evie. It was instinctual to grab Alan as he was reaching forward. Her hands, on his shoulders ignoring the coldness of the mold she commanded “Eveline, stop! Stop right now!" trying to help them all. But it was too little the imprinting bond should have made this impossible and now it was too late. Alan realising, she was touching him yelled "Don't touch me!" Pushing her as far away from him as he could but it wasn’t enough as she watched the mold consume his body and he collapsed. She saw the codex flashing red before his arm moved and Alan died. And then she saw Evie’s boots and a silhouette of arms swinging in the air before stilling as mold formed around her and Mia felt it cover her head and face screaming as the world went black… she did not know how long she was out if it all, but she became aware of her surroundings again looking down at her hands the macabre lace gloves of mold covering them. Getting up and panting watching as the mold sank into her skin. Leaving her normal hands behind. Not so normal.

Feeling Evie call for her, she began to follow it but first she noticed the bright light of the laptop. The brightest thing here. Fighting against the summons she went to it and sat down. Clenching her fist she pressed the record button, and this final message. Because one way or another she was going to die soon. She said “Ethan...” closing her eyes shaking herself. Panting as the calling became stronger, she continued “You were right. I did lie to you. I shouldn't have, but—” confirming his suspicions with that sentence and dooming him She closed her eyes again as Evie’s call was insistent “All I can say is that if you get this...” begging she said the words “Stay away. Forget that you ever knew me. Have a good life." She wanted him to live. She wanted him to move on when she was gone. Finishing the recording she stepped away from the laptop and continued on thinking she had pressed send but she hadn’t and in her desperation and Evie calling for her she didn’t think about the storm outside... Unbeknownst to Mia when she was buffeted by the wind it also hit the laptop sending it crashing to the ground and broken.

Going through the next door she caught up with Evie. Hearing the sound of running and screaming she put her arms up to defend herself as the crew member appeared and just as he was about to run into her exploded. As he did so Evie appeared and before Mia could say anything Evie promised in the most sinister voice Mia had ever heard from her “We’ll be together forever” As the siren lights flashed highlighting areas in red a blast of wind whipped down the corridor and the windows exploded. For the first time really feeling the power of the storm outside the walls of the ship broke apart. Mia felt herself slipping and grabbing for purchase but finding none found herself falling. Gripping onto an exposed pipe she looked up as if the power of her stair would keep her stable on the slippery metal, then she saw the falling bodies. As one went past, she felt it and it made her lose her grip. Looking down at the raging see she caught a glimpse of a gash on her arm but catching sight of a fire she looked up as the top exploded then she heard more closer to her. She looked up as something above her exploded and her grip was lost, and she fell. Her last look was of the ship and trying to keep afloat fighting the inevitable, but the storm was stronger, and she lost. The sea swallowed her. Fading in and out of consciousness she saw the colours of fire and the ships destruction before she lost consciousness entirely.

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Back home master bedroom 9th October 2014 A tanker ship was missing. Due to a storm. He didn’t think much of it at the time. Ethan was sitting on their flooring rummaging through papers and thought about Mia and her everything, little things like how jumpy she was how paranoid at times. And bigger things like the bruises and being vague about what she was doing. At the start she told him a lot but since the bruises started appearing. She began lying to him. And now he didn’t know what to think especially looking at the letter he was holding. The one with a threat against him. Before anything solidified in his head a loud knock sounded downstairs and opening the door, he found two men who introduced themselves as police officers asked to come in. and they talked about how in reviews of lists they found Mia’s name among the missing from the ship Annabelle. He closed his eyes as they told him they knew no more than that and left after telling him they will be back with more information when they get more for it. Few hours later a different set of police officers appeared in uniform said the same thing and Ethan didn’t say anything about the first pair. He didn’t think it was bad just poor department communication. But the look in the police officers’ eyes when he didn’t react as expected (because he already knew) was suspicious. With the same promise they left.

October 10th onwards Ethan began to look at the news slowly but surely putting information together as it became known. He looked at the list of names available Captain Ed Carlile to the Physician Gerald Waddel. He felt useless reading them. The investigators only gave him so much especially when their investigation was focused on him it was hard and relationships were damaged if not severed entirely because of it but that investigation only lasted a month and 1 week. But the damage was irreparable for everyone… he had a hard time trusting everyone in uniforms after that. It was a hard time for everyone, at the meetings of families who had also been affected by the Annabelles disappearance (people like him) he didn’t like hearing the arguments between those who thought their loved ones were dead and others thought they were alive and the amount of work they had to put in to making sure everything is safe for when… if they return. And of course, his situation and three others of being suspected of having something to do with it was still hard… in 2015 a few of the families decided to get a presumption of death certificate in March. Ethan heard their reasoning and understood why they were doing it but couldn’t take part, he and a few others still had hope. But they all went to support their friends, misery loves company and watching the argument take place was that indeed. That whilst it’s been less than a year the disappearance of a ship in a hurricane and coastal rescue teams finding nothing is good enough reason to believe they’re dead… It was not long later when Ethan and the others did the same. It was easier for them. They knew what to expect and there had been more time.

The day was warm, and the sun was shining, and he looked at the simple gravestone he and the others put together with the names that they knew. People who had families and friends. Mia Winters was towards the end. The others were obscured by flowers. He looked at his wedding band. The gleam in the sun, felt the engraving and took it off. Putting it in his pocket and going to a home that no longer felt like it.

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It was decided that they move back to the old facility. It was deemed safe. The leaks potential and actual were plugged. Going downstairs the gloved hands holding hers let go when they went through door into the room with a window. It wasn’t anything different then what she had been in before. It wasn’t until she was left alone, and the lights dimmed, she sat on the bed. Lay down on the thin mattress and heard a rustle. Getting up she reached under and found what had made the noise. Pictures of things she hadn’t seen before or heard of. She could barely make out the name on some “Eveline” and Mia was on the others. She didn’t know the names, but she knew that Eveline was her sister she wondered who Mia was (she hadn’t been introduced to her caretaker yet). Realising that made her… happy. She carefully put the papers back under mattress, the rustle meaning that she wasn’t alone. She lay down again and fell asleep. And had nice dreams for once. The girl was called Elora and she had no idea what was coming next.

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Chris Redfield read the file that was placed on his desk, then again, the third time he was able to read what was actually on the pages outside of “Blue Umbrella”. It was all the information that Blue Umbrella had on a bioweapon manufacturing group called The Connections and they were experimenting with a special type of mold that is it. There was a suspected list of incidents possibly related to it. Including a disappearance of a tanker called the Annabelle with a list of victims one seemed familiar Mia Winters nee Thorne but the familiarity was distant and he wasn’t able to place it. (the reason why would be something he remembered a few years later)

He heard the door opening as he continued reading the last page that they request him for his experience in handling bioweapons in the field when the need arises (it was never a question of “if” always “when”). No startling when a hand landed on his shoulder how could he? It was just Jill and Carlos behind her. Coming to check on him again possibly because they heard about this file. They took a seat with him and read through it all as well. Reacting as expected to the intel provided and how little they had. They had time (a week) so they read again and contacted informants. Contacting the families of the missing people from the Annabelle was a struggle and discussed every angle there was they could in that week and in the end? Chris signed the papers and started working with Blue Umbrella.

#resident evil #mia winters #my writing #re eveline #mithan #eveline baker #ethan winters #you know that old show Alias with Jennifer Garner? that's on channel 4 now as a rerun and i was thinking of rewatching #then my brain tripped into thinking of it and mia #Mia is not a scientist still not sure what the attack that infected Alan was so skipped over that #hope i got the romanian right... its a little on the nose but i like it a lot (not telling what it means)#also with the periodic table names i just went which ones have a nice sound or were funny #matrix scene of what's his name dodging bullets is me dodging dialogue #eveline deserves a family that chose her and she chose them (not the other way around)#i did consider briefly eveline griffin if you know me you know my feelings about clarke griffin #(clarke griffin is the fucking hero fuck off jason)#but then I thought about Charlotte which is yeah that happened it didn't go well #i am not sure about the title #this is long #any mistakes i am sorry and missing things i am sorry #reminder this is a mother miranda hate account #my inclusion of aunt rhody is because of a short developer interview they did and there is two the first is about a goose #the other is what we know (also i wanted to include it anyway i felt gleeful at getting to include it)#this is kinda companion piece to the thing i wrote about evie making friends in the mold network #i hope i got the love between mia and ethan and the shakyness of their relationship whilst she was in the connections #depending on everything (me not being an idiot/ figuring out tags are the main ones) i might upload to ao3 #i did consider including them watching the first few episodes of alias but it didn't fit in this so i might do a seperate story for it #also this is set over years (if you can't tell) and i would say mia trained to handle Evie for 2 years (technically not emotionally)#playing fast and loose with imprinting

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minkdelovely · 2 months

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love and power

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chapter four

“take what you want.”

Alastor x Fem!Reader ; MDNI 18+ ; [y/n] used sparingly ; Alias in Hell is Sylvie

tags/warnings: blood, flies, poisoning, mentions of nausea, descriptions of: violence ; cannibalism. ; suffocation ; and murder, kinda angsty?, slow burn eventual: smut

word count: 3.4k

author’s note: just a quick little note here for something i felt the need to clarify. there’s a moment that would have been perfect for alastor’s microphone but i am working under the fact that it’s still broken, which (to me) carries too much significance for his character and i don’t know how to magically fix it for him 🥲 i just realized i haven’t explicitly addressed why it hasn’t been mentioned at all and wanted to explain myself lol

prelude ; chapter one ; chapter two ; chapter three ; chapter four ; chapter five ; chapter six ; chapter seven ; chapter eight ; chapter nine

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Seeing the distress on your face, Angel put a hand on your shoulder and tried to do damage control. “Whoa, babe, it’s okay! It’s probably just a coincidence — forget I said anything, all right? It was a gag!”

You had been doing so well at keeping Donny from your mind today, but you could feel the panic welling up again. As the blood drained from your face, your mind raced with questions. How did Angel know it was Donny that you had attacked yesterday? How did they know each other — through work? Was someone looking for whoever had been responsible for it? What would happen if they found out it was you?

He peered over you and gave Alastor a nervous look. If you were shrinking against the static you felt building behind you, you didn’t even want to know what his face was looking like right now. But the thought of Angel being in Alastor’s line of fire was worse.

“But that was his name,” you said, giving them each a quick look. “Or at least that’s what I heard his friend call him.”

“Perhaps the elevator isn’t the best place for this,” Alastor said cooly, stepping forward to push the button that re-started your descent. He pivoted to face you and Angel and you felt admonished under his gaze. “Sylvie and I are on our way out, but if you’re free this evening Angel, we can discuss this more in private. I have some questions of my own.”

“It’s a date, Smiles,” Angel cooed, happy to diffuse the tension, and you felt yourself relax when he gave your shoulder a little squeeze. “I knew it was only a matter of time before you’d invite me up to your room.”

Alastor’s smile strained as his gaze wandered from Angel to you, leering. “Who said anything about my room?”

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The walk into the city had been quiet, the tension from the elevator ride not yet fully gone. You knew Alastor’s good mood from yesterday wouldn’t last forever, but nothing could have prepared you for Angel’s ambush. How were you just supposed to sit with this until tonight? Your mind was still going in circles with questions, but what you really couldn’t let go of was how upset you had gotten at the sound of Donny’s name. Last night you thought you had made some kind of peace with your actions, but apparently you weren’t quite there yet.

It wasn’t so much the murder that bothered you, since you knew he’d eventually recover. Besides, it’s not like it was something you technically hadn’t done before. Though what happened with your grandmother was different; you’d poisoned her for starters. The rest was damage control and you died in the process so… karma.

It was the rage you displayed that was chilling. You had never lost control like that before, no matter how upset you had been. And even though you had thrown up, you never thought — no. It was still too much to think about and your stomach turned in response, threatening to evacuate what little was in there.

You were so lost in thought it wasn’t until you were nearly standing in it that you realized Alastor had brought you to the alley. He really was such a menace. Donny was nowhere to be seen but the large pool of blood left behind had baked into the concrete. The bag with the liver was there as well, rotting in the afternoon sun.

“Is this the bag you were muttering about earlier?” Alastor asked, leaning over it with his arms crossed behind his back. You had forgotten about letting that slip while you were cleaning, your headache getting the best of you in a moment of weakness. Alastor hadn’t been moved.

He seemed unbothered by the putrid smell that you were actively trying not to gag on. Flies escaped the bag as he inspected it with the tip of his shoe and you grit your teeth in disgust at the sight. Alastor looked over at you when you didn’t respond right away, his neck bent at an unnatural angle to make eye contact. You managed a nod in confirmation, too nauseous to dare open your mouth to answer. Had he really brought you here just to see if you had been lying about it? Or did he just want to see you squirm? Probably both.

You nearly fainted when he reached inside the bag, sending more flies on their way, and held the soggy, rancid parcel in his hand. Enjoying your repulsion, he made a show of inspecting it. The glittering smile on his face one of the more genuine displays you’d witnessed.

“Such a shame. This would have made a great surprise,” he said as his hand turned over, the liver falling to the ground in a resounding, wet slap.

Almost instinctually, your hand went to your mouth, drawing out a lighthearted chuckle from Alastor. He wiped off his hand and made his way back to you then, and you trailed slightly behind him down the street. Neither of you noticed the drone.

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Alastor was beginning to feel… impatient.

Considering the ordeal yesterday, he hadn’t expected you to be in the best of moods but you had started the morning off with some promise until Angel Dust appeared in the elevator. His lip twitched at the thought. What a fucking disaster that had turned out to be! The gray cloud hanging over you since then had only seemed to build, despite his effort to snap you out of it by popping into the alley.

Of course that had been mostly, if not solely, for his own pleasure. It was disappointing but not surprising that your victim Donny had been retrieved. Alastor had recognized the name of course, recalling how Valentino was shouting at his phone as he left the dry cleaners. It just had to be one of his little toys that you messed with, didn’t it? Not that you had known, but it was only a matter of time before that garish buffoon would find out about you. And despite it all, the dried blood that nearly reached from wall-to-wall was such a marvelous sight — what a mess you had made! A job well-done indeed, though it had put him in a bind.

He knew you weren’t going to have the same appreciation for it that he did, and your disgust at his performance with the spoiled liver had been fun enough. He hadn’t been lying when he said it would have made a great surprise. But none of that had done anything to cheer you, and now you weren’t even keeping pace, walking behind him like a kicked dog. Hell, you certainly looked like one, the sullenness on your face threatening to break his own composure by the second. This wouldn’t do, not for the last free afternoon that he had you at his disposal.

Alastor paused, ignoring how you ran into him and cursed, his attention on a cafe across the street he was fairly certain he had visited before. Perhaps sitting down to chat would help. It was lunchtime, anyway.

“Let’s stop in there,” he said, looking down at you, taking care to point out the cafe. Lord knows your poor soul needed all the direction it could get right now.

“I thought you wanted something from the butcher?” you questioned, eyeing him and the cafe with suspicion.

The Radio Demon narrowed his eyes, smile tight, his shadow pulling free of him for a moment. If he wasn’t on the verge of being pissed off your question would’ve been funny; a feeble attempt at seeming to know his mind. And as of now, he was not in a laughing mood. Were you really so self-absorbed that you couldn’t tell you were on thin ice? A reset was definitely in order.

“Can’t a fellow change his mind? That rigidity of yours puts such a sour mood on everything! You seem to be full of nasty little habits,” Alastor sneered, pleased to have gotten under your skin as you scowled at him.

He didn’t wait for you as he made his way across the street, knowing you’d follow whether you wanted to or not.

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Being treated to lunch wasn’t something you had ever expected from Alastor. Impossible didn’t even begin to describe this scenario. It was just so… cordial. He always took his meals alone at the hotel, making Rosie the only person you knew he would willingly dine with. And there was no way sitting down to a table with you would equate to that. Rosie was a peer — a friend! You were not and never would be.

That much was evident when he had held the door open for you, clearly forcing his hand. Outwardly, it would have appeared a genteel act but you knew better, even without the self-righteousness on his face as you quietly entered the cafe. What else could you have done but obey? It’s not like you could run away, having already felt the ominous tug on your neck as he walked across the street.

He had left you at the table to order at the counter, and you watched as the cashier struggled to maintain his composure in Alastor’s presence, seemingly scared to death. It was the first time you had ever seen someone outside of the hotel interact with him, you realized. Alastor was being polite enough, though nothing seemed to reign in his air of superiority. The look in his red eyes told you all you needed to know: he loved having power over others. Whether it came from a place of fear or respect didn’t matter as long as he had the upper hand. This was the demon you belonged to.

When he joined you at the table, you could tell he was in a bit of a better mood. Despite the means to get here, you silently thanked the cashier for cowering. Hopefully he had softened whatever blow Alastor had in store for you. Though the placid look Alastor was giving you made you fidgety. Could be the calm before the storm…

“You’ve been testing my patience,” he finally said, waiting for the boy from the register to leave the table after dropping off two coffees. “But luckily for you, there are more important things I’d like to discuss. I’ve had quite a busy morning, not that you bothered to ask.”

It took all you had not to roll your eyes but you managed to keep a straight face, feeling his temper writhing just under the surface of his calm facade. But you had been with him nearly all morning. Or did his suite magically clean itself? What could possibly have happened in between those few gaps? Especially something you’d want or even know to ask about. And if I’d asked, you wouldn’t have told me, you thought indignantly.

“I’m sorry… the whole thing with Angel just really threw me off,” you said as sincerely as you could. It wasn’t a lie, after all. “And I don’t think going to the alley helped, either,” you added, eyes flitting from him to your coffee. Bold, but also not a lie.

He chuckled into his cup. “I’ll concede to that. I thought it would be funny, but I shouldn’t expect you to share my taste in humor. You’re still so new, and all that. But I worry if you don’t shake that mortal way of thinking you’ll wither, my dear, and that would be a shame. If you’ll allow me, I’d take great pleasure in helping you fix that.”

You were unsure of how to react. Technically, he didn’t need to ask your permission for anything, so was this just the illusion of giving you a choice only to end up as a trap? It felt as if there was always something just out of reach whenever he spoke to you like this, like the fine print in a contract. He was only direct when he was upset, which you’d prefer if you were being honest. Anger you could take — understand, even. But this? You were just spinning your wheels.

“So, what, I’m not doing the afterlife right, or something?” It had been somewhat of a joke, but the look he gave you was smug.

“That’s precisely what I’m saying. You’ve been dead a few months now, yes? But the moral compass you’re adhering to won’t benefit you here. Take Donny for instance,” he said, eyes brightening as you flinched at the name. “What’s bothering you so much about it? He provoked you, didn’t he? Regale me with your account!”

He made a show of settling in his chair, adjusting his coat and crossing his legs, apparently content to sit for hours if that’s what it took for you to open up. You remembered him asking you to tell him what Donny had done when you were walking back to the hotel yesterday, but wasn’t that just teasing? The expectant look on Alastor’s face begged to differ.

So you told him.

To your surprise, he sat there and listened as the words spilled from your mouth. Your intent hadn’t been to ramble, but he didn’t seem bothered by it as you took him through the events of yesterday morning. Eventually getting to how you had been so close to making it back in time, only to be cornered and harassed; a sick twist of fate just for wanting to be prepared. He was calm as you told him how Donny had grabbed you and licked the tears off your face, but you could’ve sworn you saw his eye twitch.

“And then I just… lost it, I don’t know,” you sighed, hiding your face in your hands. “I was just so mad! Like who the fuck did he think he was, touching me like that? And my body just reacted before my mind could catch up. But then when it was all over, I…,” you paused and let out a breath, fighting against the turmoil in your stomach from what you were preparing to say next. “I can still feel how my teeth punctured his skin. I can hear the sound it made, even more than the screaming. I didn’t even know I was swallowing it all until…”

You stopped then, the tingling in your throat painful, your coffee long forgotten and cold. He had been there for the rest of it, what more was there to say? Did he really want to know how every sip of liquid or bite of food since then had been nearly-impossible tasks? How you had sobbed in the shower as you watched the blood stream down your legs and into the drain? Or how you barely managed to look yourself in the mirror because it felt like someone else was looking back? Those didn’t seem like details he’d be interested in.

In fact, weren’t they the very things he was inferring your morality had burdened you with? You’d only be making his point for him, and somewhere in your mind you concurred. You didn’t want to be saddled with this misery forever, but the person you always thought you were was slipping away, and you just wanted to cling to whatever pieces you had left. Horror was a welcome pill to swallow. It meant that you hadn’t completely enjoyed what you had done.

Because part of you had enjoyed it.

You thought of your grandmother again. In life, there had been countless times you made yourself small for the sake of accommodation. No telling how many words had died in your throat because it was easier not to say them. So as you watched her fall out of that godforsaken chair she loved so much, gasping for air that wouldn’t come as she crawled on her hands and knees, you relished it. She had pushed you to your limit and was finally paying the price. Appalling as it was, for the first time in your life you had felt strong.

Killing Donny hadn’t left you with the same feeling of victory as killing your grandmother had, though. What his intentions for you had been, you’d probably never know, but they definitely weren’t anything good. In that sense you were very glad to have gotten to him first and, to a certain extent, would do it all over again if need be. But none of this was information you felt like confessing to Alastor.

“And here I was, hoping that the cannibals had rubbed off on you,” Alastor mourned, resting his chin in his hand. “So eating him is what’s upset you, not the murder?” You couldn’t ignore the glimmer in his eye or the insinuation behind it.

“You’re generalizing,” you chided, sighing as you crossed your arms. You were feeling very tired now. “But yes, if that answers your question. He’ll heal eventually and he would have hurt me if I hadn’t done what I did.”

“That’s true enough,” he agreed, pushing back from the table to stand. He offered you a hand and you took it, feeling slightly stiff from sitting so long. “I suppose you’re not as hopeless as I thought, but my offer still stands. I think under the right circumstance, you could learn to enjoy it.”

You scoffed a laugh. Was he serious? “Was that really what you wanted to talk to me about? I’m not trying to eat people for fun.”

Alastor didn’t answer, but his smile was wicked as he took your arm in his as you left the cafe. You did your best not to imagine what thoughts could be passing in his mind, but felt relief all the same seeing him in a better mood again.

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The two of you had barely entered the lobby when Angel sprang off the couch in the parlor, looking irritated and worn out. “Fucking finally! We need to—”

Alastor couldn’t help but wonder if he was the only creature in this realm that understood the art of subtlety. Hadn’t the debacle in the elevator been enough for one day? Was he doomed forever to salvage any bit of decorum that he could come across? It was truly lamentable.

“Sylvie, why don’t you go prepare my room for the evening? I’d prefer to speak with Angel alone,” Alastor said, removing your arm from his as he turned to face Angel Dust. He could feel his shadow threatening to separate from him, but scaring the boy would be counterproductive. “Shall we head to yours?”

He ignored your huff of frustration at being dismissed, but was grateful you didn’t fight him on it. It’s not a battle you would have won anyway. As soon as he saw that you were in the elevator, Alastor’s shadow enveloped the two of them, re-materializing in Angel’s room.

“Remind me to never let you do that again,” Angel grimaced, rubbing his arms squeamishly. “I feel dirty, and that’s sayin’ a lot.”

Alastor’s patience was threatening to snap, and he didn’t succeed in maintaining a pleasant tone when he spoke. “Why don’t we discuss whatever it was you were about to shout in the lobby? Or was the urgency just an act?”

Angel scoffed. “Hey, fuck you, all right? I was just tryin’ to help, and now I’ve been roped into your bullshit! Val’s been blowin’ up my fuckin’ phone all afternoon — he said a drone caught you and Sylvie in an alley or some shit?”

Alastor’s eyes went black, his pupils switched to dials. Fuck. This was all happening much sooner than Alastor had planned for. He had originally planned to ask Angel what Valentino had known in regard to Donny, hoping to have the upper hand and confront the cretin on his own terms. But now the ball was in Valentino’s court… and he had brought it upon himself. He just had to go back to that fucking alley earlier, didn’t he? Alastor could feel the rage threatening to consume him, but that would have to wait until he had a moment to himself.

“What does he want?” he managed to ask without venom, antlers growing despite himself.

“I don’t know, but he won’t quit houndin’ me,” Angel huffed, sitting on the edge of his bed. “He wasn’t even pissed off about Donny, he thought it was funny! That piece of shit barely gets work anyway. But now he knows you’re involved and said he wants to meet up you know where. Whatever the fuck that means…”

Alastor sighed, eyes returning to red, and wiped off his monocle if only to keep his hands busy. He’d hate to strangle Angel Dust by mistake. It would be difficult to explain, and besides, he wasn’t one to shoot the messenger.

“Tell him I’ll be there tomorrow afternoon. I’ll do what I can to ensure he keeps you out of it going forward,” Alastor said in a clipped voice, blood dripping down the corner of his mouth. He disappeared from the room before Angel could respond.

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tag list: @fairyv-ice, @wat4r, @midorichoco, @raynerrold

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fan fiction #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor x reader #alastor x female reader #alastor smut #hazbin hotel smut #slow burn #hazbin hotel slow burn #alastor slow burn #song fic #if i can't have love i want power #love and power #x reader #alastor the radio demon #the radio demon

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