#Kunstpause writes stuff

[crimsonsynastry]

Ao3 Fic Stats Meme

Tagged by the lovely @thepapernautilus ! If you love G'raha go read their stuff. (or Astarion. I haven't read it because spoilers but I'm certain their Astarion work is excellent too)

I've been dead on Tumblr so I have no idea when you tagged me in this lovely, I'm so sorry 😂

-

rules: give us the links to your fics with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and fic with the fewest words.

Most Hits | Unbreaking Breaking | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Warrior of Light/Zenos yae Galvus | Explicit | 18k words | CW: Non-Con, Violence I knew it would be this one right off the bat. One of my darkest and still most popular works, because people, like myself I suppose, want to see Zenos do some messed up things to the WoL. Zenos, pre 6.0 I found, catered to a very dark and messed up part of my mind.. And this was the result. People just seem to also like that.

Second Most Kudos | My Moonlight, Your Starlight | Howl's Moving Castle | Sophie Hatter/Howl Pendragon | Explicit | 3.5k words It has been a hot minute since I've logged onto Ao3 to check my stats properly and *wow* I did not expect this to have so many kudos. It shot up there in popularity pretty quickly, which I suppose I had somewhat expected.. My love for Sophie and Howl is not isolated, and people want to see them together.. Particularly with Howl in bird form.

Third Most Comments | In Every Life | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Original Character/Emet-Selch | Explicit | 19k words and writing Auh, my first attempt at a longfic.. I'm surprised this one has so many comments honestly. It's on hold at the moment because I started this when my writing style was significantly different, but I do hope to come back to it later when I can fully focus on writing past tense without mixing my current present tense style of writing in there.

Fourth Most Bookmarks | Tumble After Tumble | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Warrior of Light/Emet-Selch | Explicit | 24.7k words Ohhh no now we're getting into my older older writing.. I suppose people just like kinky smut with Emet-Selch, and this fic definitely has a lot of that.

Fifth Most Words | Wilt | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Warrior of Light/Emet-Selch | Explicit | 24.5k words | CW: CNTW One of my favourites that I am still writing for the lovely Kunstpause! They enabled this wonderful piece, and I hope to return to it when I'm more alive again as I've been on a bit of a hiatus. Two more chapters have already been written so honestly this shouldn't be entry number five, but the fourth and sixth entry have already been mentioned so I might as well leave it here.

Fewest Words | Pacify | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Warrior of Light/Zenos yae Galvus | Explicit | 298 words | CW: Non-Con One of many little tidbits when I was feeling dark.. Not entirely sure why I didn't throw this one into my snippets fic, but well, there it is.

In truth I'm not sure who to tag because I have been away from fandom socmed for so long (and Im only here intermittently) but, if you haven't done it already (and if yall want to do it) I'll tag @kunstpause @drk-brain @elveny @dholwrites and @hippestglitch

[kunstpause-archive]

(actual footage of me rn)

You are all gonna hate @kunstpause and me for Fictober.

[dismalzelenka]

I have an Official writing WIP Wednesday post queued but I was tagged by @a-shakespearean-in-paris in art wip stuff and as a fellow writer learning how to art I wanted to post mine too!

1. I started coloring Solona. Lighting is confusing.

2. The very rough sketch is everyone's favorite disaster DILF Malcolm Hawke in a rough approximation of modern Grey Warden armor. The breastplate has been replaced by griffon embossed kevlar. I'm scared of line art. I'm gonna do it eventually. 😅

I'm pretty sure half the people on my tag list have seen this shit in various discord servers already but I'm too tired to parse through who's seen them already sorryyyy

@laraslandlockedblues @ladymdc @sasshole-for-rent @kunstpause @dalish-rogue @hollyand-writes @charlatron @midnightprelude @noire-pandora @cartadwarfwithaheartofgold @queen-kass-the-writer @a-shakespearean-in-paris @blarfkey @wardenari @jentrevellan @decimdraws @zuendwinkel @becauseanders @ashalle-art @hobo-apostate @simper-fi fi @kagetsukai @schoute @catherea @jarakrisafis @musetta3 @sharkapologists @ellie-effie @morganlefaye79 @kittynomsdeplume @inquisitoracorn @kita-lavellan @silvanils @barbex @ocean-in-my-rebel-soul @lunar-shards @corylion @nivenor-krosis @corsair-caruso

[barbex]

WIP ASK GAME

Rules: Post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Send me an ask with the title that most intrigues you and I'll post a little snippet of it or tell you something about it. And then tag as many people as you have WIPs.

@mordinette tagged me for this, thank you! But you don't know what you're asking!

So, first of all we have the usual suspects:

Sunset, Sundown, Sunrise

31 Lost Templar

Destiny's Bite

Ever Fallen In Love With Someone You Shouldn't've

Yin to Yang

Trifecta

Solid Fluidity

Better stop here.

Then there's the other stuff:

I guess I'm a coward but so are you

food story

e1

Writing Advice for the Disorganised and Jumpy Writer

The Lady Knife

Shifterwolves

I'm tagging:

@kemvee, @kunstpause, @blarrghe, @a-tear-in-the-veil, @in-arlathan, @elveny, @pikapeppa, @hawkeish, @starsandskies, @charlatron, @enigmalea, @tessa1972, @wickedwitchofthewilds, @noire-pandora, @kagetsukai, @zet-sway​, @dismalzelenka, @roguelioness, @storybookhawke​, @bexifer, @ocean-in-my-rebel-soul​

[sinsbymanka]

Writing Tag Game

Okay listen I’m on vacation XD hence why I’m ignoring everyone’s tags/taking forever to respond. But I’ve been tagged in this A LOT and I really liked it/wanted to do it so thank you to everyone who tagged me (oh my god I’m so sorry if I missed one of you there were SO MANY): @noire-pandora, @in-arlathan, @thevikingwoman, @morganlefaye79, @elveny, @kunstpause, @pikapeppa

I’m not tagging anyone because I’m tagging everyone since I’m too lazy to find my tag list (I’m on VACATION). If you’ve not gotten tagged and wanted to do this, say I tagged you. 

How many works do you have on Ao3?

147 - I have 145 linked to my profile and two in the anonymous collection. 

What's your total Ao3 wordcount?

1,468,248. Almost 1.5 million!! 

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Of Miracles and Heroes (FenHawke, Cadash/Varric, Varania/Blackwall): 269

Interspecies Relationships Have Their Ups and Downs (Shakarian): 145

Don’t Make it Hawkeward (Varric/Hawke): 135

The Ambassador’s Vices (Josephine/Adaar): 111

The Girl with the Arrow Tattoo (Cadash/Varric): 101

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do (but - to be honest - it takes me FOREVER). I love comments. It’s so much easier to not leave comments than leave comments, so every time someone leaves one I’m blown away. I feel like - for leaving me a comment - you’re definitely owed an answer! I do apologize that it takes me awhile though - I am very bad at answering because they mean a lot to me and I get easily overwhelmed by the AO3 inbox I don’t know why. Blame anxiety. 

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I’ll be honest, I don’t like angsty endings so I don’t have many of them. By far the angstiest ending I have is Flowers, Lies, and Forgiveness. This is a Bianca Davri/Varric Tethras fic set during the final act of DA2. I wrote it from Bianca’s POV - showing Varric unraveling under the pressure of Kirkwall and Bianca’s complicated feelings about infidelity to her husband who clearly cares about her as well. I wrote it for @hollyand-writes who always lets me lean into the tragic “fucked upness” of the pairing when I’m feeling like making Varric suffer.  

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending

I prefer happy endings so almost EVERYTHING has a happy ending. My favorite endings, so far, are for Cheating the Dread Wolf, which is my Varric/Cadash/Solas polycule (or as I like to refer to it - Solas has a dwarf kink) and The Viscount’s Mistress which is my Hurt/Comfort Cadash/Varric Trespasser bullshit. 

Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've written?

I have not written crossovers - but I am very into AUs in another setting that belongs to a different fictional universe. Most recently I got back into my Downton Abbey bullshit and wrote Flappers for Fen’harel which is basically a Downton Abbey AU Solas/Cadash and I’m not taking comments about the outrageousness of it. 

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yep. Honestly though? Over the two years I’ve been active in Fandom, the shitty comments can be counted on one hand and usually came from the same people over and over again, who are easily blocked, and should stop seeking out clearly labeled content they don’t like. Me and my work are not for everyone - that’s REALLY okay. I’ve blocked people for no other reason than making things I don’t like - that doesn’t mean they’re bad people. 

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

GOD DO I.

I am extremely sex and kink positive. Because of this - a lot of my work involves sex in some way or another. I think sex is a beautiful part of many (although not all) relationships, and that it’s frequently glossed over in mainstream media (particularly queer, kinky, and polyam sex). 

This ranges from sort of vanilla slow burns (My Cole/Bea fic, Compassion for an Assassin, has smut which hasn’t been posted yet. It’s Cole’s first time and is fairly vanilla and romantic, and occurs approximately 40k into the fic) to some pretty dubious consent near 24/7 dom/sub dynamics with BDSM kinks (I’ve written JUST as much of the Sereda/Gorim problematic smut as @jarakrisafis has in our series Forced Moves). 

There’s very few kinks I’m not willing to touch at least to try out - even if I end up not liking them. And the ones that aren’t for me are 100% allowed to exist and I will fight for them to the bloody end. My only recommendation is CLEARLY labeling your shit and not being afraid to add a tag if someone asks you to. 

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of? I’ve seen ideas I’ve tried on picked up by other people - but I don’t consider that stealing and it’s hard to trace “who has been inspired by who” because we ALL have been inspired by thousands of other people and frankly more stuff for me when I pull you over to my weird AUs and rarepairs. 

I also think that’s a huge part of not getting stolen - I’ve got so much weird niche shit that only a couple people read that stealing from me is going to most likely be caught IMMEDIATELY the audience is so small. 

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don’t believe so!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! I’ve got some co-written secret smut with @blarfkey which almost nobody has seen, I’ve borrowed @tightassets Hawke, Lavellan, and Shepard for fics that she has illustrated, borrowed @tuffypelly‘s Adaars for some great fics, and my most ambitious project - the Forced Moves series with @jarakrisafis. It started out as us just exchanging gifts back and forth but we’ve wrangled it into Gambits and Countergambits, an Aeducan-origin prequel, that I’m VERY proud of. 

I love co-writing very much, but it’s very important to find the right partner and for it to be someone you trust completely. 

What's your all time favourite ship?

This is a stupidly hard question because I am, at heart, a multi-shipper. 

I love Varric/Hawke and Varric/Cadash. I’m also a sucker for Solas/Cadash. My fandom pool noodle is Varric/Cadash/Solas which I adore, and I’m very fond of Cole/Cadash. 

Most recently I’ve been DEEP in Aeducan/Gorim Saelac, Bhelen/Rica/Vartag, and Aeducan/Brosca feels. Dwarf origins are the best origins in my opinion and those characters are PERFECT. 

What's a WIP you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

I fully plan on finishing everything. My writing style changed a lot, for the better, in a short period of time. I need to integrate my old style/new style and had to get a pep talk about how to do that. Now I’m ready to try as soon as I finish Compassion for an Assassin. 

What are your writing strengths? 

I write very sexy, hot smut. I also really like playing with character voice and making sure I get them “right” so I do a lot of experimenting before publishing a new character for the first time. 

I struggle to write action scenes - it’s like pulling fucking teeth - but people really LOVE my action scenes and they read well. So that’s something I’m proud of even if it feels like doing fucking pull ups. 

What are your writing weaknesses?

I never learned anything. My experiences with English and writing teachers were overwhelmingly negative. I’m unsure if I’m just not cut out for classes or if they were that bad, but I always left feeling like there was one “right” way to do it, and everything I liked was “bad”, so what was the point of “learning” anything? 

It turns out there’s this very pompous, pretentious thought process in writing where people “assume” things must be done, but GOOD writing teachers teach you the rules and then how to break them. I either never had a good writing teacher or got too intimidated to give them a chance before bouncing. 

So I’m exceedingly self-taught. I lack the vocabulary to discuss plot structure, characterization, grammar, etc. I instinctively know most of these things based on trial and error and reading, but I didn’t learn them and I miss a lot of nuance in the rules, but until recently I was still too intimidated and unsure of myself to admit that or take it seriously. 

So - my defense mechanism is NOT taking ANYTHING seriously. If my writing is a joke to me, it’s gotta be a joke to everyone else, but that’s been a shield to hide behind instead of being thoughtful about things. I’m here to have fun, yes, but there’s nothing wrong with learning a technique to the art. 

I’ve learned - mostly thanks to @blarfkey who is an amazing person and a wonderful teacher - that I am a good writer based on my self-teaching. And being intimidated of people who throw around impressive sounding words is a weakness that I am working on. 

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? 

Use sparingly and with good reason. It should be short and explained later or clear from context. 

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter on message boards back in the fucking day. Thankfully none of it exists anywhere anymore. 

What's your favourite fic you've written?

This is such a sappy answer and I’m so sorry. My favorite things have been written for and because of people I love and care about. When I read them, I’m not just reading the story, but remembering the relationships I’ve made and how important they are. 

So, my top three fics for THAT reason: 

1. Cheating the Dread Wolf - written for @blarfkey who inspired the idea and ruthlessly encouraged me to make it happen. This fic was so healing for me because it heavily features Fatherhood within it - and I lost my father in June 2020. I don’t know if I’d have been able to do it without her and it was so important for me to do. 

2. Gambits and Countergambits - written with @jarakrisafis and the culmination of a years worth of gifting shit back and forth and crafting a shared universe. The worldbuilding, smut, relationships, EVERYTHING about this fic is so deeply and passionately cared about by both of us and to our knowledge it is completely, totally unique.  

3. Relentless, Ridiculous, and Rakish - one of my only primarily gen-fics focusing on a forming brother/sister relationship between Maria Cadash and @tuffypelly‘s Otsar Adaar. I very much enjoyed writing it for her <3 

And then my overall favorite fic: 

The Viscount’s Mistress: I have a lot of opinions about how fanfiction treats the anchor’s meltdown and the aftermath. It’s one of the things in DAI that resonated with me SO much as someone who lives with chronic pain and a disability. I loved the fact my OC was in the same shoes and STILL saving the world. This is very much a fic that explores all the dark sides of trauma, pain, and the mental health effects of it. But it ends on a happy and hopeful note.  

[curiousthimble]

Wip Wednesday

I was tagged by @kunstpause @musetta3 and @ammocharis this week! In turn, I'm tagging @noire-pandora @elveny and @laurelsofhighever and anyone else who wants to grab it!

This week's wip is full of stuff! Jellybean (the niece I made the red prom dress for) has come to stay a bit, so we're working on a vintage-inspired bolero and circle skirt in a lovely charcoal fabric that's going to be glorious.

I'm also working on a cool Dragon Age/Animal Crossing crossover character for a commission, but there isn't a whole lot to see besides the head. The one on the right is my test head and the one with the needle in it is the real thing. I think they're adorable.

And now for the writing wip! This week comes from a chapter of The Wrong Warden I've been going back and forth on for a while. The party has been split 3 ways and Hera has found herself in a bit of a predicament.

Regretfully, Hera puts down the last of the mabari. She’d hoped to sneak past them, but they smelled her before she could prepare a sleep spell. A man knows what he is doing, even if it is just following orders, but animals are simply trained to do as they were told.

The dogs had attacked her on sight, but it didn’t lessen the sadness she’d felt in killing them.

Nothing to be done for them now, she thinks, sliding to the floor for a moment. Her strength still hasn’t returned and she’s tired down to her bones just thinking of what it’s going to take to fight her way through the fort— assuming she can fight her way out.

Her stomach grumbles, a clenching reminder that her breakfast is long gone. Hunger is almost as deep a need as the terrible thirst burning in her throat; the wild magic drained her so much that her vampiric thirst, usually controlled by willpower alone, claws at her. The scent of blood— old and dead, new and fresh alike— clings to her, and Hera longs for a hot bath and a willing neck pressed to her lips. The rush of blood over her tongue, hot and—

*wiggles eyebrows* Enjoy stewing on that, my friends.

[kunstpause-archive]

Read on Ao3

Day 4: Baleful

Cold, sharp, and full of edges - the world, nay worlds, have turned into endless pain.

It’s funny, he thinks sometimes, how in this broken state and without the powerful creation magic he is used to, this husk of a world still manages to come up with new concepts.

Like torture.

It’s entirely new. In all of Amaurot’s long-lived glory, the concept of causing endless pain and suffering was never even an idea. And yet, this new world, this abomination of what once was paradise, has no trouble coming up with the cruelest of mockeries.

It changes him over time.

Back in the old days, the mere thought of causing pain or even distress to any living being would have been unthinkable to him.

Now, though?

Emet-Selch finds himself watching the already broken mortals suffer under their lot, and there is a small part of him that doesn’t feel sorry for them anymore. It’s not their fault that they are wrong, but it’s their fault for reminding him of what once was every hour of every day.

Especially when he finds them.

The first time almost overlooks them. They used to be radiant, the sun incarnate, but now they are dim and unremarkable. A soul barely worth being called that.

Broken, tattered, and frayed at the edges, he can barely look at them. He doesn’t have to, not for very long. There are plans in motion, a calamity strikes the land, and they are, once again, gone.

They don’t stay gone, though. In a cruel twist of fate, he stumbles over them again, and they are a little bit brighter than before but still almost impossible to look at. And yet he does. If he is driven by some morbid curiosity or by a darker urge, Emet-Selch can’t even say, maybe doesn’t want to know. But when he seeks them out, he finds them ridiculously easy to steer and manage.

Unlike when they were whole, this broken shard of them is easily bent. They have no defenses against him, and like a twig under his boot, they snap into pieces. It gives him an instant, a second of satisfaction, and then the emptiness is back, and he curses himself for his impatience.

His wrath, unlike him, is untempered and wild, and if he wants to gain any longer-lasting satisfaction, he knows he needs to tame it.

When the next calamity is done, he finds them again, and this time, Emet-Selch is patient. He reels them in with honeyed words instead of force, revels in the way their eyes glaze over as he tells them what they want to hear, and watches with grim satisfaction how they freely walk into his trap.

It is much more satisfying than a momentary snap of fury. Like this, his anger gets to simmer and seethe as he applies all the new concepts this broken world has taught him one by one.

The first time he makes them cry, his soul sings. Each hot tear he draws from them is like a ray of light through the darkness that surrounds him. It is fleeting, a pallid echo of what he truly longs for, but if Emet-Selch has learned one thing from his entire world dying, it is that tears are an endless abundance.

Until their mind gives out, unable to take all he puts them through, and he is alone again, already scheming and planning the next time. He learns something new from each approach.

Too much suffering and a feeble, fractured mind will simply give out. Too much leeway, and it becomes defiant, determined to end itself before it lets him do the honors. One time he pushes and prods at them enough to draw them onto his side, begging him to let them stay with him, to let them join him. It is not at all the satisfaction he had expected it to be. They are like a mindless pet, obedient but utterly dull. Not even squeezing their last breath from them with his own hands sparks even a tiny bit of joy when their eyes are already empty.

He doesn’t want them pliant; he knows by now. He wants them to be like they were, defiant, radiant, and strong. Only then does it truly feel soothing to break them apart. Never too much, always leaving them some hope to build themselves back up again so he can start anew.

It takes him a few tries, a bit of practice. But Emet-Selch is immortal, after all. And he has the inclination to always start anew and improve on failed experiments. He is, first and foremost, an architect. Be it society, scenarios, or people, building something up is where he excels - and tearing it down is what he now revels in.

Back in Amaurot, they were everything to him. The light of his life, his shining future. The whole of existence made sense and felt right because they were a part of it. The smile on his face is equal parts sadness and elation as he watches them now.

Maybe this time, he’ll drag it out a little longer. Make them fall in love with him again. Not that it’s worth much coming from a shattered piece of glass, a shard of a mirror that shows only ruin. But the illusion might be entertaining for a while. Especially once he takes that love and twists it to his liking. This new, still blissfully innocent version of them comes with an endless capacity for taking plains and shedding tears after all, and Emet-Selch can’t wait to collect.

In this endless circle of death and destruction, they are still, somehow, his everything. They can never redress the balance; they can never atone. Their suffering is for him alone to savor, and if he has lost everything else, he will make sure to never lose this. They give meaning to a tempered existence. When he has them on their knees begging him for mercy he is no longer capable of granting, it makes him forget his own pain for a moment. Each time they appeal to his heart, he smiles. It has stopped beating millennia ago, and yet when he drinks in their despair, he can almost hear the echo of his own heartbeat again. Like drums in the distance, reminding him who he once was.

In those sharp moments when he does unspeakable things to them, their pain breaks open his own. When he takes it to the extreme, they make him feel things that otherwise no longer reach him. Loss, regret, and endless guilt crash into him with a force, and just for the smallest of moments, Emet-Selch feels like he’s still real, still alive. Like anything he does still has consequences.

It hurts, an unspeakable pain punishing him for his sins - and then it is gone. When the light leaves their eyes, they take all traces of that with them, and he returns to his one purpose of serving the one that had led to all of this.

He allows him this small indulgence every now and then. It never lasts, after all. In the end, they always perish, and Emet-Selch returns to his path, all lingering traces of the man he once was, the man who would be horrified at every single thing he had done since then, forgotten. Until the next time he finds a piece of his shattered heart again, and the cycle begins anew.

[kunstpause-archive]

too many wips... but ok - the last line I’ve written in each of them:

1. “I wouldn't know how to,” she whispered before closing her eyes and letting herself fall into his kiss.

2. “Please tell me you have stopped somewhere before step four!” Leliana mumbled and Aren grinned widely. “Step one actually - turns out he was already very drunk!”

3. Not yet. But they would be and if they would have to fight another war they would do so as one.

4. “I have so many sweeter things for you,” she breathed against the other before finally pressing the mouths together, kissing Adriene deeply.

5. “Honestly, honouring the Maker is all very well but there are only so many ordinations you can watch before you get really bored.”

tagging @weissegiraffe​ @elfyourmother​ @anchanted-one​ @queenofattolia​

as usual: only if you want to - otherwise feel free to ignore (and anyone who just wants to add - feel tagged please)

Last line meme

I was tagged by @nusaran - thank you!

(I made a new post because the old one has become so long)

"She gave them another smile, then she took her pack and walked up towards the main building."

Tagging @kunstpause @curiousthimble @corey-067 @storyknitter @thevikingwoman and @defira85 (as always only if you want to ♡)

[illegiblewords]

Fic Writer Meme

Swiped this because it looked like fun!

Name

Fandoms

Most popular oneshot

Most popular multichapter

Actual worst part of writing

How you choose your titles

Do you outline

Ideas I probably won’t get around to, but wouldn’t it be nice?

Callouts @ Me

Best writing traits

Spicy Tangential Opinion

Tagging: @nilim, @azwoodbomb, @wouldyouliketoseemymask, @parvus-pica, @peregrineroad, @spiral-seeker, @frostmantle, @autumnslance, @strangefellows, @redbud-tree, @maccaroni-eh, @entropytea, @prettyparadoxes, @ivalane, @kunstpause, @fogfens

Name: Illegible or Illegiblewords lately. I’ve switched it in the past a few times.

Fandoms: I’ve been in Final Fantasy XIV for the past couple of years now. Passively I might be in Pathologic fandom and Dragon Age fandom? Maybe others too on and off. I was in comic fandoms for a long time but honestly that spiraled into a hot mess of epic proportions so I’ve mostly peaced out of there. Still love stories, characters, and buddies from there though.

Most Popular Oneshot: Ironically it’s Ideation for Bladerunner 2049 haha. I did exactly one fic there right after seeing the movie and didn’t go back, but I thought it was very good and I had a specific story I wanted to tell. It’s one of my most popular fics, and given it’s gen too I’m actually kind of happy about that.

Most Popular Multichapter: The Immortal Wound for FFXIV fandom! I had only just started writing for the fandom, and the series leading up to this fic was my first time writing NPC shipping in FFXIV. I was seriously, SERIOUSLY nervous at first! I wrote the first fic, Posturing, as a personal challenge to do an ambiguous protagonist/NPC since I saw other people doing that and wanted to see if I could pull it off. Posted it at around 4 in the morning then deleted within a few minutes out of anxiety lol. A week went by before I read it again, realized I still liked it, and put it back up for good. That being well-received helped encourage me to keep trying, and by The Immortal Wound it was getting solid attention. The experience really meant a lot to me!

Actual Worst Part of Writing: Probably chapter maps within the outlining process for me. It’s needed for how I approach things, but shit is anxiety-inducing and stressful af lol. I basically plan each event out in high detail before actually writing the fic, so when the time comes for me to legit write I’m more or less following a plan I can trust. Making that plan is the tough part.

How Do You Choose Your Titles: Often titles are the last things I figure out before starting the fic itself. I know I like punchy stuff if I can manage. Sometimes it’ll be one word, sometimes it’ll be a quote or song lyric, sometimes it’ll be a saying, sometimes it’ll be a phrase that feels fitting. I go fast and loose usually, and tbh I’ve tried to tell myself not to overthink it too hard. I do try title related works in ways that have some thematic link when I can.

Do You Outline: HahahahahaHAHAHAHAhaha yeah. Straight up my outlines are eldritch terrors for their detail, length, and complexity. I don’t mean that as a brag at all, seriously--I tend to get frozen a bit if I don’t have an outline by and large because it’s hard for me to keep track of what’s in my head and plan accordingly. Just end up with too many moving parts + revision and pacing get wonky otherwise.

Depending on the project I might have sections tied to setting, characters, magic systems, religions, etc. at the top. Fanfic this is less likely but does crop up sometimes.

To give an example of the first bullet of the first chapter of an ongoing fic:

Post-Shinryu, the Warrior of Light lingers in the Royal Menagerie alone at his own insistence to search for the Eye of Nidhogg. In the process he remembers the fight against Zenos and Shinryu. Note he was overcome by an almost feral rage at Zenos’ assumption that he was the target of anything resembling lust. Those attentions (“bite down upon my jugular”) belong to another, but note similarities of two pale-eyed, long-haired blondes. Seeing Shinryu, the Warrior had no idea whether Lahabrea survived within. The fusion was horrifying to see and as he fought he didn’t hold back because besides obvious dangers, he was also ready to mercy kill if needed. Also note Warrior wanted to intervene against Thordan for Lahabrea but wasn’t fast enough, questions a little privately how far he’d have gone against him. It might not have mattered even if he’d managed since he knows Lahabrea was going crazy and unable to listen. Locating and examining the Eye, he recognizes how drained it is. Certainly not enough to threaten him when dealing with post-battle exhaustion. So he reaches inside with his own aether, relentless in pushing aside every foreign element—Nidhogg, Thordan, the corrupted Rhalgr, the places Zenos caged them all under his own will. Zodiark’s tempering is what helps him ultimately find Lahabrea, who is barely alive. Zodiark’s tempering has preserved what it could but has a much more tenuous grip in consequence. When the Warrior finds him Lahabrea isn’t even aware, functionally unconscious. The tempering flares against him defensively and this time the Warrior focuses on it. This is all that has allowed Lahabrea to stay alive. He could force himself closer but there is no vessel. Besides, the process of separating a fragile soul so deficient in aether is too great a risk. So he keeps the Eye.

It’s not the only bullet of comparable size for that chapter. The overall piece has at least 40 total chapters, but probably more.

Ideas I Probably Won’t Get Around To, But Wouldn’t It Be Nice: Tbh probably some of the earlier WIPs I have that aren’t finished already. Not just FFXIV (Dead Language, With Good Intentions) but other fandoms. I could end up circling back in the future one day but who knows.

Callouts @ Me: “NO MORE WIPS HOLY SHIT YOU HAVE OVER 20″, “RELEARN HOW TO DO DRABBLES”, “GET UR PRESENTS DONE”, “REVIEW OTHERS MORE THE STAGE FRIGHT IS RIDICULOUS”.

Best Writing Traits: I try to write any character as the hero of their own story/with the capacity to be someone’s favorite. I do my research and prioritize telling a good story first and foremost. I can change my writing style according to need and am good at capturing the cadence and word choices of different characters.

Spicy Tangential Opinion: If no transaction has been made (esp. monetary), no one owes you shit online. Not reviews, not hits, not praise, not agreement, not content of any sort. It sucks to feel like you’re creating to a void. It sucks to be passionately in love with a rarepair when other ships are drowning in art and stories.

People still don’t owe you.

If you don’t like someone else’s content, create something exploring what you do like... or even why you don’t like that content. Tell a story. Create art. Make photosets and playlists and analyses. If it is not a literal crime (as opposed to portraying fictional crime), don’t discourage other creators no matter how awful you might find their stuff. Lend your own voice to an alternative as convincingly as you can. And if that doesn’t persuade others, you need to keep honing your own skills.

If you want more of something to exist, spread inspiration. Again this can be in storytelling, art, photosets, playlists, analysis, you name it. Give form to your passion. And if others disagree or don’t respond, keep working at it. This is a skill too, and it takes practice.

I’ve found it shows when work is created out of a sense of guilt, fear, or obligation. The quality is much lower and no one latches on to keep building in-turn. And IMO it is essential to build up rather than tearing down.

[kunstpause-archive]

Read on Ao3

Day 5: Song

Firsts are always nerve-wracking. Wherever you go, really. Be it the first day in school, not knowing all the children yet that you'll spend most of your time with from now on, or the first night in a brand-new apartment where every noise is unusual and the lights from outside are strange and unusual.

The first day at a new workplace is no different. It comes with a brand new set of expectations, but most of a, a whole lot of unknowns and uncertainties. A permanent sense of nervousness hums within you as you leave the personnel office, your brand new badge and a small box of office supplies in your arms as you get on the elevator. It's an exciting first day to have. Fresh out of university, you've landed a job at the city's most prominent architecture firm. The opportunities are endless, and despite the nervousness, you are beyond giddy to start this new chapter in your life.

The building is tall, gigantic, really. Enough to be a little bit intimidating in its dark colors and the hint of art deco designs going through it. Alone in the elevator on the long way up, the nervousness almost threatens to take over until you decide to silence it like you always do - by singing.

Fear can't take hold with a song in your heart , your mother always used to say. And she was right. Whenever something feels daunting, an upbeat song manages to take your mind off it. It might be a bit silly being on your way up to a prestigious job while singing in the elevator, but it does its job as a distraction. Well enough, so you don't even notice the elevator stopping and the door opening for a few beats.

When you do, your voice breaks off in the middle of a syllable as someone gives you a confused look before he gets on the elevator with you.

"Oh please, don't stop on my account," a deep, melodic voice says, and when you look up at the older man who addressed you, there is an amused look on his face.

"Embarrassing," you murmur, mostly to yourself before you shake your head and clear your throat. "I'm sorry, it's my first day, and this is certainly not the impression I wanted to make on my co-workers," you say with an apologetic smile.

He is handsome, this stranger that pushes a button a few floors above your destination. Tall, looking well built in the elegant combination of a dress shirt and vest he wears. His dark, chin-length hair frames a sharp and angular face with a single white streak falling in front of eyes in a peculiar color. They look almost golden, and they regard you with a questioning look.

"You are so excited to start working that you break out into song in the elevator?" he asks, a half-smile on his face as he looks at the box in your hands. "And all that before even making it to your desk the first time, I assume?"

You let out a nervous laugh.

"I am excited," you say with a slight shrug, "but if I'm honest, I was singing because standing in here and just waiting made me nervous," you admit. "I've never worked in such a big place before. I mean, what if I manage to break the copier?"

"Is that something of a regular issue for you?" he asks with a raised eyebrow, and it takes you a few seconds to realize he is joking.

"You can never know," you say with a grave nod. "There is always a possibility. And it would be a terrible start for me to piss off my boss in the very first week!"

At that, the man lets out a hearty chuckle.

"Don't worry, my dear," he assures you, "I am quite certain your boss doesn't care all that much about a copy machine."

What a strange conversation this is, you think. But for the first talk with anyone at this new place, it is delightfully light-hearted, taking your mind off your worries far more effectively than even the singing did.

"Have you worked here for a long time?" you ask curiously, and again you are met with a raised eyebrow.

"Are you telling me I look old?" the man replies smoothly, and for a second, you nearly flinch, thinking you have said something insulting when he laughs softly again.

"Ah, don't let yourself be so easily thrown," he says with a glint of mischief in his eyes. "I've worked here for almost twenty years by now."

Your eyes widen at that information. "You've been here since the start of the company?" you wonder. He must have some interesting stories to tell if he has been around for the entire rise to the top, from a small firm to the most sought after in town.

"I've been here since the very beginning, yes," he says before he gives you a conspiratorial look. "So believe me when I tell you, you'd have to break way more than a copier to evoke the ire of your boss."

"That's a relief," you reply with a laugh of your own. "So, have you managed? To piss off upper management, I mean?"

He looks at you funnily for a moment before he straight up laughs.

"Oh my dear, you have no idea. Every hour of every day," he says, eyes sparkling with amusement. "They still put up with me."

The elevator is slowing down, and you realize you have reached your floor.

"So, this is me," you murmur, the nervousness from earlier suddenly making a return, and you swallow heavily, grabbing your box a little tighter before you look at the man once more.

"Thank you for the uplifting pep talk," you say with a genuine smile that he returns as he inclines his head at you.

"I hope you have a great first day," he wishes you. "One good enough to still make you feel like singing on your way down in the evening, perhaps."

You can't help but giggle at that.

"Thank you, and who knows, maybe it's so fun I'll sing during work even."

"That's the spirit," he agrees as the door opens, and with a last nod, you step outside. "I hope I'll see you around," he adds just before it closes, and you are not entirely sure if you imagined a little wink going with that or if he had actually looked at you like that.

For a moment, you just stand there, wondering about it, before you give yourself a push and start looking for the office you are supposed to report to. It's still your first day, after all, and despite the reassuring talk from the stranger on the elevator, you really don't want to start your career by leaving the wrong impression on the person in charge.

[allycryz]

tagged by @kunstpause​ and @elveny​​

Tagging everyone who wants in!

Coming up next in Daughter of Gelmorra (I write far ahead because I need stuff to marinate):

A fic where Haurchefant takes his leave of his brothers and they have a heart to heart. After that: a duology set in early SB. The first is about Thancred visiting the Waking Sands and grappling with grief and jealousy, the second is later that night when Uri and Haurche hook up for the first time

This is from the Thancred one:

--

“...Answer me this,” he says in a quiet voice. “Urianger is not just a distraction, is he? Because he does not give his heart easily.” Thancred would know, having failed to obtain it. “And if seducing him is a way to pass the time, you would be better suited with Ned or someone else.”

When Haurchefant looks at him, it is as if those bright blue eyes see into his marrow. Thancred feels his soul is being weighed, no doubt found wanting but before that verdict: a parsing of what is inside. 

“He is not a way to pass the time,” Haurchefant says at last. “When I do take lovers for a short span, I am clear about it. Were that all I wanted from him, I would make that apparent from the start. But that is not all I want from him.”

“No?” Thancred’s voice is soft. Dangerous. Sharpening the edge in a way Haurchefant cannot miss.

“No. Urianger is...a man I would love, if he would let me. And I am not telling you what you want to hear to avoid getting punched like my brother.”

Thancred lets himself relax and chuckle, though the bitter irony does not go unnoticed. Looking at Haurchefant is like gazing into the warped mirrors at festivals, the ones that show children distorted images of themselves for them to scream and laugh at. Only he has the strong sense that he is the mirror and Haurchefant the fair-goer.

“Good,” he says instead of voicing any of this. “He has been through a great deal and deserves someone who will be patient with his wounded heart.”

“They are lucky to have you, Thancred,” Haurchefant says. “To watch over them.”

He cannot stop the flinch that moves through him. The blow is unexpected when he has become so used to guessing when another apology, another consolation, another you did all you could and no one here is to blame, it is Ilberd and Teledji and Lolorito who did this is about to appear. 

[blarfkey]

Fic Writer Meme

I got tagged by @elveny and @kunstpause​  -- thanks for thinking of me!

Name:

Fandoms:

Most popular oneshot

Most popular multichapter

Actual worst part of writing

How you choose your titles

Do you outline

Ideas I probably won’t get around to, but wouldn’t it be nice?

Callouts @ Me

Best writing traits

Spicy Tangential Opinion

Name: Blarfkey on here, discord, and AO3.

Fandoms: I read for a LOT of fandoms but I have written for: X-Men, Dragon Age, Pokemon, Star Wars, The Hollow Kingdom Trilogy, and Assassin’s Creed Odyssey.

Most Popular One shot: “Clowns to the Left of Me, Jokers To The Right” which is part three of my series focusing on Peter Maximoff and Magneto from X-men Days of Future Past figuring out how to be father and son when his dad is a super villain. It’s a series I love deeply and had so much fun writing and this story is probably also my favorite out of the four I wrote.

Most Popular multichapter: Dear Fen’harel, my Solavellan college AU/Dear Daddy Long Legs AU monster fic that I have somehow kept up for almost kept up for four years despite the fact that I am NOTORIOUS for never finishing anything long and losing interest. I will finish this fic if it kills me.

Actual worse part of writing: Well, I for one, really suck at world building. But I think the worst part about writing are all the days where I have the desire to write and the time for it, but not the energy or the words. Every sentence is like pulling teeth and it really sucks cause I only have time to write on the weekends during the school year so if it doesn’t happen then I have to wait another week.

6. How you choose your titles: I hate titles and I’m bad at them. Sometimes I will read a line in a fic and be inspired by it, but mostly I steal outrageously from songs and poems.

7. Do you outline? Sort of? I have to have some kind of plan or I forget what I’m doig and I get off track. But I can’t plant meticulously. Its basically a list of scenes that I want in the order that I want them and I just go down the list and write it. I always leave room for new ideas to spring up so the outline changes a lot.

8. Ideas I probably won’t get around to, but wouldn’t it be nice? I have so many WIP ideas for different fandoms -- like ATLA, Persona 5, The Queen’s Thief series, but all of that requires a lot of research and study of the material and the characters, especially if I haven’t seen or read something in a long time, and I just don’t have the energy for that. Dragon Age is easy cause I already know everything I need to.

9. Callouts @ me: Refreshing tumblr for the fiftieth time in ten minutes is not going to inspire you and its not going to make this chapter come out any faster so get off your ass and write.

10. Best writing traits: I am really proud of my dialogue and banter and how I build relationships of all kinds between then characters.

11. Spicy Tangential Opinion: The reason why I write fanfic 90 percent of the time is because what is out there already doesn’t satisfy me. Either what I want is no where to be found, which is what inspired my Peter and Magneto fics, or I hate what is already written. A lot of fic for me is spite fic, because I hate seeing the same type of relationship dynamics or OCs so I almost never read anyone else’s fic recs. I’m so so picky about what I will like, I am not chill at all, lol. I’m never rude about it and I always thank them, but a lot of the time what people rec me is the stuff I hated so much I had to write my own version. If I have an interest in what’s out there and I trust your opinion, then I usually just ask for recs when I’m ready for them.

Tagging @wizardofozymandias @salexectria and anyone else who wants to! Names escape me and I don’t want to tag people who has already been tagged a bunch lol.

[captainderyn]

17 Questions, 17 People

Thank you for the tag @kunstpause <3

--

nicknames: Deryn for basically all my online stuff at this point! 

zodiac: Sagittarius

height: 5ft 6in/1,67m

last thing i looked up: What mirza means because my bf was playing through Metro Exodus and we couldn’t figure out if it meant something (not that I could find)

song stuck in my head: Rumors by NEFFEX (major Quinn vibes)

no. of followers: 252 as I just checked, hello everyone! 

amount of sleep: Oh gosh...finally between 7 and 8 hours again. I stopped sleeping more than 3 or 4 hours in September (plus sleep issues before that -_-) because of insomnia and gosh it was miserable. Not sleeping means I get killer migraines. 

lucky number: I can’t say I have a particularly lucky number but the number 7 lingers in the mind so we’ll go with that. 

favourite instrument: to listen to: string instruments 

favourite song: So I cycle through favorite songs but one that always brings me comfort and gets me in my feels is Concerning Hobbits from the LOTR soundtrack. 

dream job: Some form of Intelligence Analyst, of all things :’)

aesthetic: Oh gosh...it depends. For the most part it’s flannels and leather jackets, powerful feeling but comfortable, ect. Living wise its rustic and books and wood. But let’s be real in reality I’m covered in dirt and horse hair 98% of the time so my aesthetics are nice in theory. 

favourite author: Hmm I can’t say I have a single favorite author either. J.R.R. Tolkien inspired me the most as a writer. But Rick Riordan holds a special nostalgic place in my heart for rereadability. 

favourite animal noise: My horse Gunther’s neigh/nicker of greeting when I pull into the barn! It makes my heart melt <3

random: I’ve wanted to finish and publish a novel for the longest time. My first “attempt” (ie when I had an idea I wanted to write) was when I was 12. I worked on it until I was probably 14 or 15 in various iterations, but it ended up not really going anywhere. An ex friend read through it and completely trashed it--breaking my confidence. A Short Look Into Haunted minds is the first original non-fanfiction related idea that’s stuck with me since (and I’m not almost 20).

Tagging...oh jeez, I don’t think I know 17 people to tag. Let’s see (no obligation to do this!): @anchanted-one @elveny @lumielles @storyknitter @greyias @skullinacowboyhat @claudela 

[deathvalleyqueen]

Okay so I was tagged by a few people for WIP Weds... so here is to hoping I didn’t miss anyone! OKAY thank you @nightwingshero​ @kunstpause​ @faerieavalon​ and @pd3​ for tagging me this time! 

This is from a oneshot I started writing the other night to start establishing like the backstory to MJ and John’s relationship... and the first big thing that happens is they move in together after MJ is kicked out of her parents house... and yeah... MJ didn’t realize that John and here were in an actual relationship (because John didn’t say anything.) and here is the moment MJ finds out she is in fact in a relationship with John...

I am going to leave tags open cuz I am getting to this soooo late in the day... 

As John carried in the last of my bags I stood nervously holding my brother’s old football duffle bag in my hands. “John you really didn’t have to do this…” I muttered nervously watching as he closed and locked the door behind him setting the suitcases down with the two others by the door. 6 bags held all I owned in the world. It still gives me pause to think back to that. “I could have gone to be with my father’s sister in Boston..” 

“The Nun?” John asked sharply. “Your mother was trying to send you to a convent, Mary…” There was condescension in his voice like he thought I hadn’t seen what my mother was trying to do and I had, but I still felt like I was putting him out. “This is fine, you are here most nights any how..” He walked over to me and took the bag from my hands, setting it on the floor. “It’s fine..” 

From his tone I could tell part of him was at least a little nervous about this situation but John never took me for the relationship type back then. “So, where do you want me to put my stuff?” I asked softly wrapping my arms around my chest looking up at him. 

John took a deep breath as he gave the matter a good few minutes thought, his eyes occasionally darting back over to me before he started nodding. “We’ll find room in my bedroom I suppose..” 

“You want me to move my stuff into your bedroom… not the spare room?” I ask raising an eyebrow, I had expected him to say the spare room as that seemed to make the most sense to me given out non-relationship...relationship. 

Shrugging John laughed, “Unless you..” 

“No I just figured because we weren’t…” I gestured nervously between us. For as long as we had been sleeping together, almost every day...sometimes several times a day. There was never discussion of exclusivity or relationship. The closest we had gotten was when John asked me to stay that first night by holding me tightly as he mumbled ‘don’t go’ against my shoulder. I never left him after we had sex again after that, but that was the sum of our relationship discussion. 

Shifting his weight as he ran his hand along the back of his neck John’s sharp blue eyes were locked on me. “I thought… this was... “

“A relationship?” I asked nervously hoping I hadn’t overstepped and much to my surprise John nodded his head. “How...when…” I asked confused. “Never once have you made me think before right now that we were in a relationship?” I was a little taken aback this whole idea but John seemed even more confused.

His brow furrowed as he took a step back. “You sleep in my bed every night…” He starts slowly almost like he is shocked I didn’t notice all these things. “I make you breakfast, I don’t make people I am just fucking breakfast…” I purse my lips not fully believing him and John sighs. “I punched your brother for calling you a whore...like Mary Jane.” He groaned frustrated that I couldn’t see all these small things that I hadn’t thought about till that moment. “I am not a relationship guy, usually I sleep with someone a few times I loose interest and move on…” I groan as I toss my head back. “No, no, let me finish.” He paused waiting for me to look at him. When I did he continued. “But, that never happened with you. I wanted to spend more time, with you.” 

“So when you asked me to stay…” I started slowly realizing I had missed when our relationship had even began in truth. 

John nodded head slowly. “I don’t ask people to stay… I don’t want people to be there when I wake up in the morning.” He paused and reached out for me. “But I want you to.” I took his hand and he pulled me into a tight embrace. He looked down at me. “So… we are a we.” He began slowly, “And you can put your stuff in our bedroom because where else would you?” I smiled softly and nodded slowly. “Settled?” 

“Settled…” I repeated with a coy smile. 

[kunstpause-archive]

Wip Wednesday

Thank you @starsandskies and @noire-pandora for tagging me!

I’ve sat these out for a while bc I barely was on tumblr, but have a little from an upcoming chapter of Death and the Maiden

Solus enters the senate session as a decorated war hero with more triumphs under his belt in his short career than others can boast about after decades. He speaks, and every soul present listens, hanging on his lips as he talks of change, of progress and wealth. He takes the floor, a soldier among politicians, but they revere him for his words as much as they are in awe of his deeds. There is an uproar when his speech culminates in a demand for a sudden vote - but the noises going through the senate chambers are those of affirmation and enthusiasm. Solus steers the public reaction like a conductor of an orchestra. He decides the tempo, the pacing and the volume. He lets people speak at the perfect moments, adds their voices to his chorus like they belong there.

Irene watches from the sides, mesmerized to see how he gives everyone their cue and they simply start dancing to his tune.

When the time for the vote comes, it is nearly unanimous, and Irene has no doubt Solus remembers the face of every single person against him behind his benevolent smile. He entered the stage as a man with a simple mission and a daring proposal - but he leaves it now holding the power over an entire nation in his hands, power freely handed over by those elected to govern. And they gave it to him with a smile and a happy heart, Irene realizes. Solus has turned himself into a dictator over the course of little more than two hours, and all it took him was a resounding victory and a few well-placed words to make nearly everyone else in the room think it was a natural progression, an idea born out of their own volition.

He staged the perfect, non-violent coup while the people cheer and thank him for it, and as he smiles at her across the room Irene knows that this can’t possibly be the end. That a man like him has higher aims still, goals she is yet unaware of. Just as she knows that, whatever they are, they are only a matter of time.

Solus van Galvus has just taken over the entire Republic of Garlemald, becoming it’s sole ruler under thunderous applause. And in the wake of his ascension there is no one left to challenge him anymore.

@ashalle-art @elfyourmother @elveny @exposed-whimsy @allycryz @dismalzelenka @captainderyn @tishinada @another-rogue-trevelyan @cartadwarfwithaheartofgold @curiousthimble @dalish-rogue @tightassets @wardenari @zuendwinkel @okami-zero @jentrevellan @a-shakespearean-in-paris @hollyand-writes @charlatron @lavellanvibes @blarfkey @hobo-apostate @midnightprelude @queen-kass-the-writer @amaurotian @alamhigyoooo​ @lynmars79​

[allycryz]

Fic Writer Meme

Tagged by @elveny and @kunstpause (thank youuu)

Name

Fandoms

Most popular oneshot

Most popular multichapter

Actual worst part of writing

How you choose your titles

Do you outline

Ideas I probably won’t get around to, but wouldn’t it be nice?

Callouts @ Me

Best writing traits

Spicy Tangential Opinion

Oh hey this got super long so putting under a cut

tagging all of YOU! Do it!

Name: Ally, allycryz, BountyHuntress16 on Ao3 which is a username I have carried from the early FF dot net and DA days

Fandoms: Currently writing for FFXIV, reading in everything. Do write some YYH with a friend and have written for Bioware games, MCU, DBZ (though I have not brought my DBZ fics over to Ao3) . Did some time on the Bioware kink memes back in the day (more about that later)

Most Popular Oneshot: Okay gonna do of all time and for FFXIV since FF is my current 

Of All Time (Ao3 stats only)

Tetrad: Wrote on the high of CA: The Winter Soldier which is still one of my fave movies of all time and flung myself deep into Sam/Steve/Nat/Bucky fics. Also one of the first times I let myself explore some ~*feelings*~ I’d not allowed myself to before and would not really understand for at least another 3-4 years

Also my only G-rated fic on Ao3

Current Fandom

Ardent: Around HW time I was struck by the idea of “man I would love to do a fic where Haurchefant and Nerys are trapped in a cabin in a blizzard” and I finally gave in and did it, and it sorta launched everything I’m working on now

Also the first thing I had actually finished in a long time. This year has been a year of finding ways to finish things and learning to not fall into “if you write a snippet of any other WIP then you are BAD” 

Most Popular Multi-Chapter: While I did some time on both of the big Bioware kink memes back in 2011-2013, I was more active in the Mass Effect one. A prompt caught my eye that intrigued me and I couldn’t get it out of my head, so I sat down to write and it just...poured out of me

I look at a lot of stuff I wrote in college and before and it is...honestly rough a lot of the times because college was a time of breaking away from some truly toxic and harmful ideologies. Every day I find a new pre-conception I need to shed

So I am honestly surprised that given the subject matter and my immaturity at the time, Galaxy’s Oldest Profession turned out as well as it did. I still really like it. Idk, maybe there is a reason it just...sprung out of me like it did with a bisexual heroine who wasn’t afraid of her body and her sexuality. And again, this was years before I let myself come out to myself.

Anyway that got extremely sentimental but even though a nasty, doubting part of me is worried I peaked then, I’m glad I wrote it and that people like it. (Also the Shepard in that is so different from the Paragon I played, both are extremely dear to me in different ways. I think my first tattoo will be a paragon symbol for **reasons** but this renegade-flavored Shep in the series is a part of me too.)

Actual worst part of writing: Getting started, feeling like you have a picture in your mind but what you write comes out as poo, worrying if it’s Bad Actually and you don’t realise

How do you choose your titles: Lately it’s been scouring the thesaurus for an hour and writing out about 50 titles before something clicks. I’ve gotten around the “summary problem” lately by doing a snippet in the description but titles are tough! The last one that didn’t suck was “This World of Trials” because I had the FFIII song “The Breeze” stuck in my head and it worked thematically so...picked a lyric 

Do you outline: Not formally. I have tried this for larger projects to varying degree of success. When it comes to one shots (and right now I’m pretty much doing connected one-shots or one-shots broken into chapters for readability) I usually have scenes in mind I want to do and either figure out how they connect as I go, or dwell so long mentally that I have an idea of what’s coming as I write

Ideas I probably won’t get around to, but wouldn’t it be nice? One abandoned WIP I don’t think I’ll return to is a cyberpunk-urban fantasy hybrid world I came up with for a McHanzo AU. Still enjoy reading about the pairing from time to time but I lost steam and haven’t picked up the game in a few years now. But maybe I’ll keep the world I made for something later?

I did have a story sorta planned for ME3 to make the Galaxy series a trilogy but the sequel, while it has scenes I love, did feel a bit of a slog at the end. Folks–and I think most of us are past this stage but just in case–it is a bad idea to put in a pairing you don’t really vibe that much with at a commenters’ request and then go back and forth with them about whether or not you are writing the character well. (Also I really had not spent enough time with Ashley to write her with confidence.)

I also had an AU idea I took a crack at where John Shepard is F!Shepard’s husband and they fell in love during the Akuze background where she saved him. Then a few years pass and she realises she has let him take all this credit for her work, thrown away a lot of her career for him, and when she is bypassed for Spectre for him...she needs some time away and takes command of a ship where she meets Garrus. But I just don’t know if I’ll write for ME again. 

Callouts @ Me: Just you know *waves vaguely at how all my insecurities and need for validation can sometimes skew how I see myself as a writer* stuff. Also try to break out of the comfort zone I have found myself in with present tense and not describing enough

Best Writing Traits: I have some fun dialogue and do my best to tap into my big emotions. Also some of my metaphors and similes are cool

Spicy Tangential Opinion: I appreciate if you like my story but please do not start with “I normally don’t like OCs.”