#Leigh Shaw x you

[ginnsbaker]

fic: if i bleed (you'll be the last to know) (16/17)

Part Summary: You and Leigh cling to each other, counting down the days until she leaves next year for Matt's book tour.

Pairing: Leigh Shaw x Fem!Reader | Word count for this part: 5.300+ | Tags/Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Strap-on usage (r receiving), oral (r receiving), sex in public | Author's note: Just R and Leigh being all over each other before we wrap up this series :)

Masterlist | Part I Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VIII | Part IX | Part X | Part XI | Part XII | Part XIII | Part XIV I Part XV

-

Your internal clock kicks in at five in the morning, even though it feels like you and Leigh only just fell asleep, exhausted after hours of chasing each other to the brink and back. You’ve long since stopped counting the times you’ve brought each other over the edge, a relentless pursuit of pleasure that left both of you gasping, spent, yet craving more. 

Was it possible to share an orgasm that stretched into what felt like hours? If so, how were you not just a tangle of bliss-wrecked limbs, dead to the world?

You vaguely remember a drowsy conversation as you were both drifting off, your sweaty bodies tangled in the sheets. You’d managed a murmured question about the future, about what happens when Leigh hits the road for the comic tour. But she’d just pressed a lazy, silencing kiss to the corner of your mouth. “What if tomorrow an asteroid hits Los Angeles?” she’d teased, nosing the length of your jaw, pressing a kiss here and there.

You tried to frown, your mind foggy with sleep. “Be serious,” you muttered.

“I am,” she whispered back, her lips brushing against your ear, sending shivers down your spine. “I’m dead serious about sucking every drop of now, not wasting a second on what-ifs.”

You’re not entirely sure what happened next, only that when Leigh said the word suck, you felt a tingling sensation that surged down to your core. Before you knew it, you were on your back again, with Leigh skillfully coaxing out the final, shattering orgasm of the night from you.

Stretching your back, you hear a few satisfying pop, reminding you how sex with Leigh was nothing short of a workout, your muscles pleasantly sore from it. The first pale light finds Leigh beside you, her back turned, skin bare, and just a whisper of the sheets covering her. You realize you’ve monopolized the covers throughout the night. 

You carefully pull the sheet over her, tucking it around her exposed shoulder. She’s still out, peaceful, her breathing even and deep. You can’t help but slide closer, wrapping an arm around her waist, her skin so soft and warm. You kiss the back of her neck lightly, her scent—a mix of sweet sweat and the faint floral of her shampoo—fills you up.

Soon enough, the gentle rhythm of Leigh's breathing lulls you back into sleep.

-

When you wake up again, hours later, the bed beside you is empty. The covers are tucked around you, forming a comforting cocoon, undoubtedly Leigh’s thoughtful doing. 

There’s no rush to throw on clothes; you relish the comfort of the sheets against your bare skin as you slide out of bed. It's not your first time being in Leigh’s room, but the last time you were here, you barely made it a foot inside before being overtaken by the fight you were having. Last night was different. In the darkness, nothing mattered except Leigh’s cries of pleasure, the slick heat between her thighs, and the taste of her lips, completely consumed by the wonders of her body. With the slow start to your morning, you realize you now have all the time in the world to explore Leigh’s room.

Though, quite literally, there’s not much to unpack here.

In one corner near the windows, stacks of cardboard boxes are still wrapped in tape. They are remnants, you guess, of her life with Matt. Drifting over to Leigh’s desk, you notice a notebook sitting there, its pages shut tight. The temptation to peek is there, but you respect her privacy, leaving it untouched. Above the desk, a small shelf is lined with books—classics you recognize and, surprisingly, a few romance novels by Emily Henry. You're not usually into romance, but you make a mental note to check out this author on your next visit to a bookstore.

Exploring Leigh’s room reveals a charming minefield. Clothes are draped over chairs, pooled on the floor, or spilling from drawers. The dresser is a jumble of lotion bottles, perfume, earrings, and hair ties. It's all quintessentially Leigh—somewhat untamed. Your self-guided tour brings you inevitably back to the doorway. Just as you’re turning to give one last look over the room, the door bursts open. It's Jules, and the moment she sees you, her eyes widen in horror.

“Jesus, Y/N!” Jules shrieks, throwing her hands up to shield her eyes. “What the hell?”

Scrambling, you grab a throw pillow off Leigh’s bed and hold it in front of you. “Jules! I, uh, didn't think anyone would be coming in,” you stammer, cheeks heating up.

“Why are you naked in my sister's room?” Jules demands, her voice muffled by her hands, still covering her face. The question sounds ridiculous even to her ears—everyone knew you and Leigh had a date last night.

Of course, you're naked in her sister's bedroom the next morning. Where else?

“I—We were just—” Every explanation sounds more absurd as you try to find the words.

“Just—don't. Please, just get dressed,” Jules interrupts, still not looking at you.

Nodding, you quickly grab the first clothes you can find, not bothering to check if they’re yours or if they’re clean. Within seconds, you're awkwardly pulling on a white shirt featuring a pickle wearing aviators, captioned Dill With It, and squeezing into lime shorts that are definitely a bit too snug and short for your taste.

“I'm decent,” you announce, hoping your voice doesn’t betray how flustered you feel.

Right then, Leigh emerges from downstairs, looking bewildered by the commotion. “What’s going on?” she asks, eyes darting between her flustered sister and you in your bizarre outfit.

Jules lowers her hands slowly, peeking out with one eye before fully facing you. Her irritation is palpable as she glares at Leigh. 

“You said I could borrow your charger from your bedroom!” Jules exclaims, her finger quivering slightly as she points it at her sister.

Leigh blinks, her lips twitching as she fights the urge to laugh. She sneaks a glance at you, your face now resembling a ripe tomato from embarrassment, and mutters almost absentmindedly, “I assumed she'd still be asleep.”

Jules huffs, “Whatever.” She strides over to Leigh's desk, grabbing the charger with a dramatic flourish. You stand frozen, barely breathing. As Jules heads for the door, she pauses, crinkling her nose as if a new thought has just occurred to her. She turns, eyes narrowed slightly in disgust. 

“And open a window, would you? It smells like a brothel in here. Gross.” With that parting shot, she's gone.

Leigh lets out a breath and shakes her head. She steps closer and wraps her arms around you, her laughter bubbling up. “Well, that was something,” she says, coming over to wrap you in a hug. She gives your shirt a playful tug. “You kind of rock the pickle look, though.”

“It's a new trend,” you joke, pulling her a little closer. As you do, you lean in to kiss her cheek softly, whispering, “Good morning.”

Leigh smiles and leans in to kiss you on the lips, but you instinctively bring up your fingers to your mouth, mumbling, “I haven’t brushed yet.”

Unfazed, Leigh simply pries your fingers away and presses her lips firmly against yours. It's a quick but solid peck, leaving you both smiling.

“Morning breath doesn't scare me,” she murmurs, tracing a finger down your throat to your clavicle. “Besides, after last night, I think a little morning breath is nothing we can't handle.”

Grinning, you dive back in for another kiss, deeper this time, as Leigh starts steering you backward towards the bed. Just as the back of your knees hit the mattress, a rumble from your stomach interrupts the moment—loud, untimely, and embarrassingly intolerant.

Leigh chuckles, her forehead resting against yours as she catches her breath. “Guess that's my cue to feed you something other than kisses,” she says with a smirk, pulling back and offering her hand to help you up. “Come on, Jules made breakfast.”

Gratefully, you take her hand, letting her lead you out of the bedroom.

-

“Forget that research gig, I'm heading straight to America's Got Talent,” Suzie jokes, staggering back to the table after a spirited, if slightly wobbly, rendition of Total Eclipse of the Heart. She's already half-drunk but radiates happiness, her performance having drawn cheers and hearty sing-alongs from the crowd at the karaoke bar.

She flops down in her chair, cheeks flushed and grinning, as your group erupts in cheers and claps. Tomorrow is Suzie's last day, and you had her pick the venue for her farewell party. Knowing how much she loves to sing during downtime at the clinic, a karaoke bar was an obvious choice.

“Here's to Suzie!” you shout, trying to be heard over the sound of a couple belting out a ballad on stage. “For the longest time, you've been the clinic's backbone and heartbeat. We never would've made it without you. You'll be terribly missed, but remember, our door is always open for you.”

The table erupts in cheers before everyone empties the glasses they're holding up. You drop back into your seat, feeling a little dizzy after that round. It's a small group—just you, Suzie, Foreman, Sara, and your maintenance guys, Joey and Mike.

Suzie suddenly leaps to her feet, glass raised high. “And a huge shout-out to the hottest boss I've ever had the pleasure of working ‘under’!” she yells, punctuating her words with a devious wink. Your team bursts into laughter, their uproar drawing whistles and applause from some folks at nearby tables. Sara chimes in with a spirited “Hear, hear!”, while Foreman simply rolls his eyes, a hint of envy in his expression—he's already made a pass at Sara and was swiftly rejected.

You wave your hands dismissively. “Alright, alright, let's not give everyone the wrong idea,” you say, your cheeks reddening a bit from both the attention and the alcohol. Just as you're about to retake your seat, feeling the room sway slightly with your tipsiness, your phone vibrates in your pocket. You fumble it out to see Leigh's name lighting up the screen. You’d texted her this morning inviting her to join the farewell, but her busy schedule had made her confirmation uncertain.

You excuse yourself and stumble slightly as you rise, steadying your hand on the back of your chair. Weaving through the tables, you find a quieter spot near the entrance of the bar to answer the call.

“Hey,” you say, pressing the phone to your ear, your voice dropping as you move away from all the ruckus. “Everything okay?”

“Hey,” Leigh's voice cuts in, a bit choppy and barely audible over the blaring speakers. “I'm outside of the... Brass Gibbon? Am I at the right place?”

You miss the last part of her sentence. “Sorry? Can you say that again?”

Strangely, you catch Leigh's deep sigh perfectly. “I said I'm outside,” she repeats.

“Oh! Hang on, I'm coming out.”

You dash out of the restaurant and spot Leigh leaning against the wall. You can’t help but rush over and wrap her in a tight bear hug. It’s only been two days since you woke up in her bed, but you’ve already missed seeing her, smelling her, feeling her in your arms.

She laughs and returns the hug. As she tries to pull away, you tighten your grip, holding her for a few more precious seconds. She relents with a soft chuckle, patting you lightly on the back. When you finally let go, her eyes roam fondly over your face, taking in your slightly flushed cheeks and dreamy stare. Seeing this, her smile only widens.

“Someone's had a few too many,” she teases.

You hiccup and try to defend yourself, “I’ve just had three—no, four!”

Leigh smirks and shakes her head. “Four, huh? Must've been some party,” she says, taking your hand. As Leigh leads you back toward the bar, you find yourself gazing down at your intertwined hands, a goofy grin spreading across your face. You giggle softly to yourself, slightly buzzed and thoroughly enchanted by the simple act of holding her hand.

Upon reaching your table, Suzie waves enthusiastically to get Leigh's attention. Leigh responds with a bright, “Hello, everyone!” as you both approach the group. There’s a moment where everyone looks expectantly at you, waiting for an introduction. Momentarily distracted by Leigh's presence, you get a nudge and a whisper from Suzie sitting next to you, “Introduce her, you goof!”

Quickly regaining your composure, you turn slightly, still holding Leigh’s hand. “Everyone, this is Leigh,” you announce, proud and slightly nervous. Everyone takes turns shaking her hand and introducing themselves. You watch anxiously as Sara stands up to greet Leigh, but Leigh's smile never fades, and a wave of calm washes over you as you observe your team warmly interacting with your—

“Is she your girlfriend?” Foreman asks overtly. The room goes quiet. Everyone's eyes swing between you and Leigh, waiting.

You're stuck, words lodged somewhere in your chest, not sure what to say or how to say it.

And then Leigh beats you to it.

“Yes.”

You blink, staring at Leigh, flooded with relief and suddenly feeling very, very horny.  When Leigh notices your dazed look, her face switches to concern. “You okay?” she asks. Before you can answer, she’s already grabbing your hand, turning to everyone, “Excuse us, Y/N's not feeling great.”

You're still reeling from her bold affirmation and too captivated by Leigh to piece together a coherent thought. The next thing you know, you're being guided—rather roughly—into one of the bathroom stalls, your back pressed against the door as Leigh locks it behind you.

Leigh leans in close, her breath hot against your ear. “You shouldn't be wearing your white doctor's coat out like this,” she murmurs.

You open your mouth to explain—it was chilly, and beneath the coat, all you had on was a skimpy black strappy dress. But as Leigh slides the coat from your shoulders, her lips find your earlobe, gently nibbling. The words die in your throat, replaced by a sharp intake of breath. Leigh pushes you harder against the door, her body pinning yours with surprising force. That's when you feel it—the unmistakable hardness of a strap beneath her pants. A deep, needy moan spills from you as she starts grinding against you.

How did you miss the pronounced bulge in the tight jeans she wore to meet everyone? Was this part of her plan? The nerve of it—meeting everyone, introducing herself so confidently and casually, all while planning to take you here, in a public bathroom. It's almost as if she was silently bragging to your team, “Yeah, I’m about to fuck your boss in a public bathroom. Nice to meet you.”

The thought alone makes you soak your panties. Despite the thrill, the risk of getting caught in public makes you hesitate. “Leigh, they’re waiting for us,” you protest weakly.

Leigh just grins against your skin. “But I'm not done making you feel better,” she whispers slowly, making you clench your thighs together from how hoarse her voice has gotten. Her hands are deft as she bunches your dress around your waist and begins to unzip her pants. All the while, she deposits open-mouthed kisses along your neck, leaving a trail of saliva in their wake. 

“Leigh…” you whine, unsure if you're trying to make her stop or urging her on out of impatience. She just smirks, that knowing look in her eyes telling you she’s got you right where she wants you. Before you can protest again, she pulls you into a deep, toe-curling kiss that melts your doubts away.

Then, you see it. Leigh pulls out a seven-inch strap-on, its girth substantial. Her hand barely fits around it as she spits into her palm and coats the silicone with deliberate strokes, preparing it. 

You're teetering on the edge, mind spinning, when Leigh switches things up on you. Suddenly, she’s on her knees, and before you know what’s happening, she’s tugged your panties down. You’re about to react when her tongue hits you, slick and warm, tracing up your pussy.

“Oh my god!” you cry out.

Leigh’s tongue works magic, and she hums against you. “You taste sweeter every time,” she murmurs, just before her tongue dives back in for more. You can only moan in response, words failing you completely as pleasure builds. Just when you’re about to peak, Leigh pulls away, leaving you hanging on the brink. She stands quickly, grabs the strap-on, and steps closer. Her grin is wicked as she rubs the toy against your slick folds, coating it with your arousal. When the thick head nudges your clit, you can’t help but curse out loud.

“Leigh! Fuck!”

Leigh clamps a hand over your mouth, her eyes widening slightly as she hears someone enter the bathroom. She gives you a quick, commanding look, silently instructing you to wrap your legs around her. As you comply, the toy squeezes tighter in your folds, making you shudder.

“Put your arms around my shoulders, hold tight,” she murmurs, breathless from the effort she’s exerting to hold you up. She guides the tip of the cock to your entrance. “Ready?” she asks softly. You nod, pressing your face into the crook of her neck to drown out any sounds. Without another word, Leigh thrusts into you in one swift motion. The size is a shock, and you bite down on her neck to stifle a cry, the slight pain mingling with deep pleasure. Sensing your need to adjust, Leigh holds back, her body taut yet patient, giving you a moment. Once you give a slight nod against her neck, Leigh starts moving again, slowly at first. 

She continues thrusting into you, speeding up just a little, her lips just inches from your ear. “I've been thinking about this, fucking you like this,” she whispers.

Dumb with pleasure, you gasp out, “H-Here?”

“Not here, silly,” she breathes out, her rhythm faltering slightly as a particular thrust grazes her clit just right. The strap-on drags tantalizingly against your walls as she pulls out, then sinks back in deep, hitting spots that light you up from the inside. Leigh’s fucking you like the strap is a true extension of hers. For a second there, you wish it were. 

“Ideally, I'd have you in your bed, where you can scream your l-lungs out,” Leigh whimpers as her movements grow more and more out of control. She drives into you relentlessly, each stroke making you slicker, drawing moans from deep within you. “S-Seeing you tonight... I couldn’t w-wait.”

You've never been so wet, so ready, and every time she pulls back, you feel the absence of her deeply, desperately not wanting this to end.

Leigh changes her approach, drawing back slowly until only the head of her cock remains inside you, before surging forward, slamming into you. Each powerful thrust pins you harder against the door, the sound of your bodies smacking together rocking you into a lust-filled haze. The sheer strength of her movements turns you on even more, making you more slippery, and soon you can practically hear the sound of her fucking you—wet, squelching noises that you're sure anyone nearby can hear.

True enough, you catch the sound of hurried footsteps and the door slamming shut as someone rushes out, likely realizing what's happening. 

With the coast clear, she carefully lowers your legs from her waist, sensing that you’re close but knowing you need more. Just when you think you might lose it, she suddenly pulls out. You barely have time to gasp, ready to curse her for stopping, when she swiftly turns you around and positions you over the toilet, making you brace yourself on the seat.

Without warning, she enters you from behind, the angle allowing her to go deeper. Leigh drags your dress further up your body, her hands roaming over your smooth back before digging into your hips. Your breathing becomes shallower as she continues her unforgiving pace, but you crave more.

Sensing your need, Leigh sneaks a hand in front of you, her fingers finding your swollen clit. She circles it tightly with three fingers, massaging the engorged nub. “Look how big it's grown,” she whispers huskily in your ear. “You're so ready. Practically dripping everywhere.”

You whimper helplessly, tears forming behind your eyelids from the amount of pleasure you’re receiving. 

“I wish I could come in you, fill you up.”

That does it. Your body tenses, and a powerful orgasm crashes over you, making you cry out. Leigh tries to hold you up, supporting your weight as you lose all sensation in your legs.

“Fuck, Leigh!" you moan, trembling. “That was... oh god…”

Leigh doesn't stop, her own need for release driving her forward. Despite your pleas about how sensitive you are, she continues relentlessly, her fingers expertly working your clit again. “Leigh, please,” you whimper, your body overstimulated and trembling. “I can’t—”

“Just one more, baby,” she groans. “I-I’m close.”

At Leigh’s plea, your body, still reeling from the first orgasm, starts building up again. “Oh god, Leigh,” you gasp, feeling the pressure mount once more, your body trembling uncontrollably. Within seconds, you're hurtling toward another peak, your legs shaking as she drives you over the edge. A second, even more intense orgasm rips through you, your cries echoing in the small stall. Leigh finally lets out a low, guttural moan, her own release hitting as she keeps you bent over, her fingers never stopping their assault on your clit until every last wave of pleasure has wracked your body. 

Shortly thereafter, Leigh finally slows, her thrusts easing until she stops completely, still buried deep inside you. She pinches your ass appreciatively, then tests how sensitive you are with a small thrust that has you hissing. She chuckles at your reaction, taking pity on you. Bending over, she kisses your cheek and whispers, “I'm gonna pull out now, okay?”

You nod weakly, still catching your breath. Leigh begins to withdraw slowly, her eyes fixed on the junction of your bodies. She watches, fascinated, as she draws back, the wet tendrils stretching and finally snapping from your pussy to her cock. 

“Look at you,” she murmurs in awe, half to herself, as she finally frees herself completely and tucks the strap back inside her pants.

“Are you okay?” she asks, noticing you’ve been in the same position longer than usual.

“Yeah, just give me a minute... or five,” you reply with a breathless laugh.

She laughs softly too, then helps you pull your panties up from your ankles. Once you're somewhat decent, she sits on the toilet lid and pulls you into her lap, resting her forehead on your chest, eyes closed, her breath steady on your sternum. You weave your fingers into her hair, massaging her scalp gently. Leigh sighs contentedly, but then her voice turns apologetic. 

“I'm sorry for… I literally lost control. It's just... I keep seeing you and thinking of February, when I have to go and I—”

“I know what you mean,” you interrupt softly, tilting her head towards you with fingers under her chin. “I don't want to waste a single moment.”

Leigh nods, then quickly buries her face in your chest to hide her watery eyes, her head nestled comfortably against your breast.

For a while, you just hold each other without saying anything, content even in the cramped space of the stall. After a while, you gently suggest, “We should get back. Don’t want to give the staff any ideas.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Leigh says, lifting her head to meet your eyes. 

She helps you to your feet, both of you adjusting your clothes, sharing a quiet, knowing smile. With one last kiss, you step out of the stall together.

When you and Leigh return to the group, it's clear they're more inebriated than when you left. Except Suzie. The smirk that spreads across her face as soon as she sees you gives away that she's pieced together what happened between you and Leigh. Your cheeks flush immediately, providing Suzie all the confirmation she needs. Without missing a beat, she guides you both back to the booth and strategically sits between you and Leigh, still smirking.

“Thanks for coming, Leigh,” Suzie says, offering Leigh a beer.

Leigh accepts the drink, taking a large gulp before saying, “Sorry for crashing your party.”

“No, you’re not,” Suzie says with an impish grin. “I told Y/N to invite you. I wanted to meet you properly before I go.”

“Oh?” Leigh looks up from her drink. “Why’s that?”

“Suzie—” you try to interject.

Suzie holds up a finger to shush you. Leigh's eyebrow arches at the gesture, clearly feeling provoked by your former receptionist's antics. You tense up for a moment, worried Suzie might say something offensive to Leigh.

Instead, she grins and says, “I wanted to meet the reason my boss stares into space half the time.”

You shoot Suzie a deathly glare, but she just laughs. 

“Really?” Leigh asks, amused. “That bad, huh?”

Suzie nods, enjoying every second. “Oh, yeah. It’s been fun watching her daydream.”

The rest of the group laughs and then Foreman accidentally spills his drink down his shirt, drawing everyone’s attention. Taking advantage of the distraction, Suzie leans in closer to Leigh, her expression becoming earnest.

“I might not be Y/N’s best friend,” she tells her, “but consider this a friendly warning from someone who cares about her just as much. Don’t break her heart, okay?”

Leigh meets her gaze head on and says, “I don’t plan on it.”

“Good,” Suzie says, rising from her seat. “Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to kick off the second set of my concert tonight.”

-

Leigh doesn’t mention Suzie’s little warning to you, choosing to keep it to herself. Yet, as she spends more time with you, those words linger in the back of her mind, subtly coloring her perceptions and the way she observes your interactions. It’s not something she dwells on openly, but it’s there, quietly guiding her along the way. 

You don’t tell Leigh how she’s been everything you could ever ask for these past few weeks, but you've noticed. You see her thoughtfulness in the small things—like how she always brings you your favorite coffee just the way you like it, or the way she listens, really listens, giving you her undivided attention when you talk about your day, no matter how trivial the details. And it's clear she's not holding back; she's refreshingly candid. Leigh shares everything that's on her mind, effortlessly expressing how your words or actions impact her, for better or worse—a true companionship.

The sex gradually tapered off, but your longing for Leigh has only grown—not just in a sexual sense. You miss her in the mornings when she's makeup-free, leaving a small mark of drool on your pillow. During the day, you wish you could grab lunch with her or talk about the new book you spotted in a shop window, especially after deep discussions about its author. You long to share every detail of your day with her, to hear her take on the little things, to see her in your dreams.

Simply put, you find yourself wanting her around all the time.

It's risky to find yourself wanting her even more than you already do, but you've long since surrendered control over your own heart. It feels like being a prisoner on death row, helplessly waiting for the inevitable moment she leaves LA for her tour.

-

One evening, Leigh surprises you with a picnic dinner at the park. She finds the perfect spot under a massive oak tree and lays down a cozy blanket. From her basket, she pulls out a homemade lasagna that’s still warm and a grazing box loaded with your favorite cheeses and cold cuts. 

As you settle down, Leigh pulls out a bottle of wine and two glasses. She winks, assuring you she definitely got permission to take it from her mom’s cellar.

You smile, watching her pour the wine. “So.. what’s the occasion?”

Leigh shrugs as she hands you a glass of wine, her smile easy. “I just wanted to do something nice for you,” she says simply.

You take a sip, enjoying the flavor, but there’s a nagging feeling you just can’t seem to shake off. 

“You've been going all out for me lately,” you quip, keeping your tone light. “What's this really about?”

Leigh’s smile fades just a touch, though her eyes remain hopeful. She takes a deep breath.

“I spoke with Matt's publisher,” she starts cautiously. “I’ve officially agreed to go on the tour. They've sorted out all the details—the itinerary, the places, everything.”

The news doesn't surprise you. You've been expecting this; neither you nor Leigh can keep avoiding the inevitable, hiding behind the rush of desire you have for each other, the comfortable days that are, you both know, numbered.

You fall silent for a while, simply lying down with your head in Leigh's lap. She seems taken aback at first, but quickly adjusts to make you more comfortable. You look up at her, smiling, finding her face and the night sky an unbelievably stunning match.

Leigh gives you a funny look, her brow furrowing slightly. “Did you hear what I said?” she asks.

“Yeah, I heard you,” you mumble, still distracted by her face. Then, as an afterthought, you whisper, “You were always going to go.”

She nods, looking upward, her eyes glistening as she tries to blink back tears.

“Are you going alone?” you ask.

Leigh takes a moment, then shakes her head slightly. “Danny might come too,” she admits. “But with his new job in Vegas, I doubt he’ll be able to.”

As you absorb her words, you realize why you asked. Maybe part of you had sensed it, maybe you needed the confirmation. Regardless, you know you have no say in the matter. If Danny is there, at least someone can look out for Leigh.

You hadn't noticed you'd voiced your thoughts about Danny possibly joining her until Leigh says, “I can handle myself just fine, you know.”

“Of course, you can,” you reply quickly, “but that won’t stop me from worrying.”

She gives you a soft smile and starts toying with your hair, gently pulling strands and braiding them. The slight tugs as she twists your hair into braids lull you into an almost sleepy state. You're drifting on the edge of dozing off when her voice, soft and tender, pulls you back. 

“I love you.”

Your eyes snap open. Leigh’s refrained from saying it during sex, and not that you’ve been counting, but it’s the third time. It takes you a few seconds to process, your heart catching up with your mind, and then you notice Leigh's amused smile. 

“I love you, too,” you whisper back. You can sense that your statement simultaneously makes her both happy and sad. You wish you could make it all joy, all the time.

But that’s not how life works.

Leigh bends down, her lips brushing softly against yours before she pulls away, her breath warm on your face. “Do you think this would be easier if we hadn't said those three words to each other?” she whispers, her eyes searching yours for an answer.

You sigh, mulling over her question. “I honestly don't know,” you say, voice soft but certain. “But I couldn’t have kept it to myself, not with how I feel about you. All I know is I love you, whether you’re leaving or staying.”

Leigh's eyes well up again, but this time she lets the tears fall. She leans in, her forehead resting against yours. “Thank you,” she murmurs. 

“For what?” you ask curiously, sitting up.

Leigh wipes her tear with a dainty finger, then traces the line of your jaw before pecking you on the lips.

“For being you,” she whispers. “And for showing me that life can go on in any number of ways.”

[fandomnerd9602]

Leigh: (giggles) shut up

Y/N: no it’s true. You look like a beautiful flower filled goddess right now.

Leigh: you’re so corny

Y/N: aw shucks…get it?

Leigh smiles and shakes her head…

Leigh: why do you always make me laugh?

Y/N: cause I want to make you smile. I love you, Shaw. I want you to be happy.

Leigh takes their hand…

Leigh: every moment I’m with you I am

For @lifespectator

[gingiesworld]

I Am Not Matt

Leigh Shaw x GN! Reader

Warnings: Angst, Unhappy ending

18+ MINORS DNI

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Ever since Y/N had come into Leigh’s life, she had finally started to believe that she could move on, move past the grief that swallowed her whole. Y/N had always surprised her with flowers when they came home from work, took her out on spontaneous dates and even cooked her her favourite meal. Even though those gestures made Leigh see just how lucky she was to have such an attentive partner, she slowly started to withdraw herself from the relationship. The nights they would spend together between the sheets became little to non-existent, the spontaneous dates never really happened as Leigh always came up with some sort of excuse as to why she didn’t want to do it. Even when she received flowers soon fizzled out, Y/N soon started to realise that she was pulling further and further away. They barely spoke anymore, everytime Y/N would start up a conversation, Leigh would completely shut it down almost immediately.

“I’m off.” Y/N would say every morning when they saw her in the kitchen having her morning smoothie, their heart broke a little when she only shrugged. So they left without a single word off of Leigh. They spent their day working under the hot sun, wondering what had went wrong between the two of them.

“You look like you could do with a drink after work.” Jim stated as he helped Y/N by holding the plank of wood in place for Y/N to drill it into place. “Trouble in paradise?”

“You could say that.” They answered him.

“Then it’s settled, we’re having a drink and you can tell me all about it.” He told them before they both moved on to their next tasks. The day soon went by fairly quickly, work and banter with their colleagues slowly taking their mind off of their failing relationship. Soon they found themselves sitting in a booth at a bar not too far from the construction site. “So, talk to us.” Jim told them once they had their first drink.

“You know Leigh and I have been together for a couple of years right.” Jim nodded and waited for them to continue. “I think she.” They took a deep breath. “She’s pulling away from me and I don’t know how I can fix it.”

“Have you tried talking to her?” He questioned as they just nodded.

“She doesn’t even talk to me anymore. There’s no communication with her and I am trying, I am really trying to do everything I can to try and make it right and make it work.” They rambled on as they played with their glass, swirling the liquid within. “I don’t think she loves me anymore.” They whispered sadly before they downed their drinks.

“How long has this been going on for?” He asked as Y/N shrugged.

“Months.” They told him honestly. “We don’t even sleep in the same bed anymore, I know she gets out of our bed once she thinks I’m asleep.”

“Do you think she could be cheating on you?” He asked them as they shrugged.

“I don’t know.” They looked at him sadly. “I just, I love her more than anything and I don’t think she will ever feel for me the way I feel for her.”

“Well, I think you really need to make a decision, you have got to do what makes you happy.” He told them. “If your relationship is failing, and you’re the only one who is putting in all of the effort, it’s best to jump ship.”

“I was going to propose on our next anniversary.” They admitted. “I already have the ring and everything prepared.”

“I’m so sorry buddy.” Was all he could say before Y/N grabbed their wallet and left, paying the tab beforehand. They hadn’t realized the time when they had gotten home, seeing Leigh sat on the sofa, her eyes glued to the door in which they entered.

“Where were you?” She questioned them angrily. “You were supposed to be home hours ago!”

“So you finally noticed me?” They sneered as they moved towards the kitchen. “You’ve spent months ignoring me, forgetting I even exist.”

“Have you been drinking?” She questioned as they just laughed at her. “Are you cheating on me?”

“Why would I cheat on you, huh?!” They questioned angrily. “You know that is something I would never do! I don’t make promises just to break them, and I am not Matt.”

“No, you’re nothing like Matt.” Leigh seethed. “He knew me! He loved me!”

“If he loved you, he wouldn’t have cheated on you!” They yelled. “I wouldn’t ever cheat on you. You know the kind of person I am, when I want a relationship, I want to know that there is a future. You know very well I don’t do flings and I never saw you as just a fling.” They looked in her eyes sadly, reaching into their pocket. “I wanted everything with you, I wanted to build a life and a future with you. I love you so fucking much.” Their tears started to fall as they spoke. “But I know that you don’t love me, I was just a means to help you to try and forget your pain. It’s more like an addiction to you, and once I wasn’t doing it for you anymore, you go back into this place. You shut everyone out, everyone who loves, when was even the last time you spent time with your mom or Jules these past few months?”

“I see them every day.” She answered them with a scoff.

“At work!” They yelled. “You haven’t seen them at any other time! You go to work and then come home. Maybe you go to the store on some days to get you endless bottles of wine.”

“This isn’t even the point I was getting at!” She yelled in frustration, making Y/N laugh loudly.

“You haven’t spoke a single word to me, and you have the nerve to think I would hurt you.” They told her shakily. “You have no idea how much you have hurt me, you shut me out, I had no idea what I had done wrong, I was trying to figure it out for months. But, I had done things the way I have always done them since I first asked you out. I continued to do all of the things that made you smile, or laugh. I genuinely thought we had a future.” Leigh watched as Y/N had completely detached themselves from her. “I do love you, but I can’t do this anymore.” They told her as they pointed between themselves. “I can’t keep allowing myself to get hurt because I love you so much. It’s not fair on me.”

“What are you saying?” Leigh questioned, the first sound of regret in her voice.

“I’m saying it’s over.” They told her bluntly. “Us, we’re done. I’m done.” They sighed as Leigh just watched as they moved towards their room, grabbing a bag before packing some of their belongings. “I’m going to sign myself off of the lease.”

“You can’t.” Leigh whispered as she watched them from the doorway.

“I have to.” They told her as they zipped up their bag. “I need to leave before what we have kills me, and you need to move on. Just because you’re still alive while he’s not, doesn’t mean that you can’t learn to love someone new. You deserve to be happy Leigh, you just need to heal first instead of hiding from the pain.”

[writing-house-of-m]

Playing Games & Mischief

Leigh Shaw x GN!Reader

Summary: Leigh's sleep talking has you wondering what she could have been dreaming about

A/N: I only got this request when I asked for some ideas last week, which I'm actually grateful for lol Here you go anon, I hope you like it. It is very cute in my opinion 😌 but let me know what you all think!

You have been wanting to see Leigh all day, she was already gone when you woke up this morning. There has been something you wanted to ask her since you woke up in the middle of the night last night. 

Something you think will embarrass Leigh which means you have to mention it for your own entertainment. 

The sound of the front door opening and the rustling of bags indicate Leigh is finally home. ‘Finally!’ You think. You have had to wait for her all day (a few hours). 

Sneaking into the kitchen you quietly walk up behind Leigh and wrap your arms around her, your voice is low when you speak. "Hello wife," you say, pressing a kiss on Leigh's neck. 

You don't think you will ever tire of saying that - 'wife'. 

Leigh greets you back and when you look up to see the full grocery bags she turns her head to peck you on the cheek. She busies herself with emptying the contents of said bags. 

After you place another peck on Leigh's shoulder you pull away giving her some space to continue with what she is doing. 

You stand by her side leaning against the counter and crossing your arms over your chest.

"Mrs Leigh Shaw, my love, my wife, the eternal light of my life." Leigh raises an eyebrow at your antics wondering where this is going to go. “I have a question for you.” 

You don't wait for a response and continue, "Does 'You did some bad things, but I'm the worst of them' sound familiar to you?" You ask. 

Leigh squints her eyes at you confused. 

To clarify, you add sweetly, "What were you dreaming about last night, love?" While grinning. 

It's quick, and if you were anyone else they would not have seen it. There is the briefest look of realisation on your wife's face before she schools her features once more. 

And even though you know she knows you can catch her in a lie, she still chooses to withhold the truth from you. 

"I don't know what you're talking about, babe." Leigh grins back then turns around to walk to one of the cabinets to put some cans of food away. Purposely looking away from you because she doesn't want you to see the sheepish look on her face. 

Oh, she wants to play. Time for a little fun. 

"Sometimes I wonder which one will be your last lie,” your grin widens as you raise an eyebrow. 

Leigh makes her way back to stand next to you seemingly unaffected. 

Being with Leigh for so long means you know all the right buttons to press. So the tone of voice you use is one you know will get a reaction out of her. 

You lean in close, one hand leaning against the counter, the other going to the small of Leigh's back while you speak low, “You know, I know when you're lying. Why must we play these games, Mrs Shaw?” 

Leigh glances over at you from the corner of her eye then sighs, resting her hands on the flat surface in what you think is defeat. 

You're so close to her now you can practically feel the effect you have on her especially with your voice teasing Leigh right by her ear, "Tell me love, what was it you were dreaming about?" 

Leigh turns her head to you, your lips inches apart. You twitch your eyebrow while biting your bottom lip ready for Leigh to fall victim to your charm. 

What you don't expect is for Leigh to reverse the roles. 

"What if I say I was dreaming about you?" It's Leigh's turn to raise her eyebrows and bite her lip. 

"I had you in the palm of my hand,” she narrates sultrily, hand on your chest to push you so that your back is pressed against the edge of the counter. “And you just wanted to," Leigh's hand slowly makes its way up your bicep,"touch me." She finishes as her hands glide up your neck and rest there.

Goosebumps flair on your skin as you sigh, affected by how close she is, her breath brushing your lips. Your eyelids droop as she takes hold of your stings and plays you like a puppet. 

This is not going how you thought it would. 

"Then what happened," you whisper. You're surprised you even get the words out with the way her fingers play with the hairs at the nape of your neck.

"And then," she pushes her body, if possible, even closer to yours. Her soft edges mould perfectly to you while your arms catch up to the instructions your brain is sending out to wrap around her waist. You feel heat radiating from your cheeks and the tips of your ears when she brushes her nose against yours. 

When she leans in, “And then…” you blink slowly waiting for the gap to close. But Leigh pulls away, "And then I woke up!" She slaps your cheek twice then heads out of the kitchen, leaving you standing there in a dumbfounded mess. 

"You can finish with the groceries, I'm going to go shower," Leigh says, her voice bright. She pauses at the doorway to look over her shoulder at you. You, with your wide eyed, mouth agape look of despair, "love." Then proceeds to walk away. 

You rub the back of your neck while you scrunch your eyebrows together, "What just happened?" You sigh to yourself, looking at the items that still need to be put away. Your brain then slowly catches up with the fact you had just been played. 

Freezing for a second, it hits you. What she instructed. And where she is going. 

You scoff as a smirk takes over your face and before you know it you're racing off in the direction your wife just went, "Leigh Shaw, you're going to regret that!" 

When Leigh hears your footsteps closing in on her she tries to run away but you are too quick for her. Leigh shrieks when your arms wrap around her, capturing her like prey. 

You both fall into a fit of laughter stopping a few feet from the bathroom. Turning Leigh around in your arms, she buries her face in your neck to avoid looking at you, playing coy. 

"Nuh uh, let me see those pretty eyes, baby," you say, using your hand to guide her face away from its hiding place. 

When her green eyes meet yours your smile is automatic. You swear you see them sparkle with how much they seem to be shining at this moment. The sparkle you initially think is admiration turns out to be mischief. 

She raises an eyebrow, "So, how exactly am I going to regret my actions?" Leigh asks cheekily. 

"Let's just say, 'You did some bad things, but I'm going to be the worst one of them'." You mock Leigh with her own words from last night, making yourself chuckle. 

In response Leigh rolls her eyes, pushing your shoulder. 

Shortly after, the mischievous look takes over her face once again, "I want to know how you're going to punish me." 

That damn lip bite is going to be the death of you, but this time you are not going to let her win. 

You lift her up with ease and lean in close, your lips barely grazing hers to say, "Oh, I have a few ideas," before closing the gap between you and making your way to the bathroom. 

[wandussyfantasy]

Hey buddy

I have a request for Leigh Shaw and GN! Reader w peepee :)

Reader and Leigh have been a friends with benefits type of thing. Leigh also made it clear about no feelings since she wasn't over losing matt and she just needed a distraction. It isn't until she hears that Y/N has been going on a date with Becca, another widow from grief group.

Leigh then confronts reader about it and she realises in that moment that she has feelings for them which she tells them and then walks away. Ghosting them until they confront her at her home while Amy and Jules are out. They tell her how she has ruined their growing relationship with Becca by making them realise that they have always felt the same. Resulting in Leigh bringing them in for a passionate kiss and reader then asking if they can take her on a date.

Thank you awesome dude.

Love Me or Leave Me

Summary: You and Leigh have a special arrangement that gets disrupted when she finds out that you have been dating her friend, Becca.

Pairings: Leigh Shaw x NB!AMAB!Reader

Word Count: 6,749

WARNINGS:

18+ ONLY, MINORS DO NOT READ & DO NOT INTERACT!!!

smut, gn!reader amab, powerbottom!leigh, fingering, dirty talk, fluff, agnst, car hookup, fantasies, teasing, foreplay, and creampie.

𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓. 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐄𝐃 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍.

“‘What is grief, if not love persevering?’” The nerdy grief counselor reads out to the group from his notebook. “How can we relate this line to ourselves and our own experiences with grief?” 

You sigh and look over to see that Leigh is just as unimpressed as you are with the new counselor. The one that usually led this group had to move to another state and so the organization has been trying to find a replacement. Unfortunately, the only people volunteering their time to help people with loss either haven’t experienced it themselves or are fresh out of college with psychology degrees they have no clue what to do with. You clear your throat and scratch behind your ear before you fake a phone call and leave the group. “I am so sorry, it’s my mother,” you excuse yourself as some regulars in the group try not to snicker. You walk out to your car and without much thought, you move it to a more secluded spot in the dark parking lot and swipe through a dating app as you wait.

Leigh knocks on your window a few minutes later. “I thought you wanted to give this guy a chance,” she says as she climbs on your lap. 

“I did, until he started quoting a comic book character,” you kiss her to trigger the physical response you needed in order to feel something other than the annoyance and the pain of your loss. She is grinding against your bulge to help you harden. It doesn't take you long, it's been almost a full week since the last time the two of you have met up for this since you went on a short trip with your friends. “You look very pretty in this dress by the way,” you compliment her as you dip your fingers in her panties to rub her clitoris. 

“Shut up,” she says, she thinks you only like it because of the easy access you'll have to her. But then again, that's why she chose to wear the dress in the first place. Leigh wasn't much for wearing dresses unless there was an occasion. Her mom was curious as she left the house and although this is the time Leigh normally attended the group, she began to wonder if her daughter was using that as a cover now and hoped that she was going on a date. You kiss as much of her exposed skin as you can while you finger Leigh and as much as she is enjoying the way your fingers know how to move, that's not what she is looking to penetrate her. She pulls your head up from her chest and kisses you hard. “Fuck me already,” she whispers impatiently. 

“Alright,” you say as you unzip your pants and pull out your dick. “So bossy,” you grumble as you penetrate her. “But fuck, I’m not complaining,” you grunt as soon as her warm walls envelope your thick cock. Leigh holds onto the seat as she rides you until she realizes that something is missing. 

“You have a condom on right?” She asks through breaths as she continues to move her body up and down on your lap. 

“Uh,” you try to figure out the best way to tell her that you don't have one on and the best way at the moment as your brain is clouded with lust is, “No.” 

She doesn't stop moving as she hits you upside your head. “Why not?!” 

“You told me to fuck you already. It's not a big deal, I'll pull out. Oooh this feels so good.” You say as you continue to meet your hips with hers. You start to kiss her body and get even more turned on when you realize she doesn't actually mind that you're fucking her raw. 

“Do you use them when you go on dates?” She asks as she slows down. Pregnancy wasn't her concern. She doesn't want to contract anything, she's gone this long without ever getting anything, she wants to continue that streak. 

“No,” you start out plainly just to mess with. This time she stops moving completely and looks at you with wide eyes. You break into a smile. “I don't sleep with my dates. It's only been you since we started this arrangement. I'm clean, I promise. I got tested weeks ago.” 

Leigh sighs as she wraps her arms around the back of the seat. You move your hands from her thighs to her ass. “Don’t scare me like that again, it's not funny.” She moves her hips in a small circle motion and you moan as you tip your head back as you promise not to do that again. With your neck exposed to her, Leigh does something she never really does. She leans in and starts to softly kiss your neck until she reaches a spot that depending on the shirt you'll be wearing after this, may or may not hide the mark she is about to leave. 

As you feel her sucking on your skin you start to pound into her as you're getting so close to finishing. “How close are you?” You ask as you pick up the pace.

“Almost… almost there,” she pants out as she grips onto you. 

“Where should I…?” you ask as you feel the build up of your impending climax. The answer that Leigh almost gives, surprises her and puts her over the edge as she imagines the way it would feel like to have your cock pulsing inside of her, filling her up with your semen. It's been so long since she's felt that. It was a surprisingly extremely rare occasion with her husband. Since he didn't want kids and was on and off depression medication they rarely had sex without a condom and even if they did, he almost never came because the medicine made it difficult for him. As she orgasms her walls clench around you almost as if they were trying to milk you. Her body is tempted to feel your release in full as she has felt you cum inside of her a few times with the condom on. But she wasn't going to feel it tonight. She pulls herself off of your cock, impressed that you held off your release and she grabs a napkin from the passenger's seat, you typically ate something on the way to the meetings. She covers the tip of your penis and uses her other hand on the base to help you cum. You groan as you empty into her hand. 

“I'll see you later,” she kisses your cheek and exits your car. 

Later that month, Leigh is meeting with Becca for tea before Leigh’s next class. The young widow is still teaching at her mother's women's health studio and Becca attends a class when she can to stay fit and stay connected with Leigh. The two have grown closer as Leigh finally started to let people in, slowly but surely, and Becca has learned to respect Leigh's need for space. 

“So, I've been seeing someone,” Becca starts as she stirs her tea slowly with an anxious smirk as she tries to contain her excitement. 

“Really?” Leigh is surprised, she didn't know that Becca was dating. 

“Yeah,” Becca starts and waits for Leigh to press for more information and once she does, Becca's act falls apart as she spills all of her secrets. “So, you know Y/n, from group? That guy that lost his mom? He's also in some indie band that in my opinion is totally underrated and-” 

“Isn’t Y/n nonbinary?” Leigh cuts Becca off, she didn't like it when people misgendered others, especially not when it's you. 

“Yes! Oh shit, did I say 'he'? Damnit,” she shakes her head. “I’m sorry, I'm still learning this whole gender and pronouns thing. Anyway it's Y/n. We've been on a few dates lately and I think it could turn into something. That's if I don't screw it up. Ugh, I hope I don't. I really like him- them! I like them.” Becca hangs her head. “I swear, I'm not doing this on purpose.”

Leigh remains quiet as she processes this information. She had your tongue inside of her just this morning when she accidentally broke a rule and spent the night at your place. Now she's finding out that you're dating her friend? “It’s fine, I think. I don't know. My sister knows more about it than I do. She says that some people don't mind the mess ups as long as you respect their preferences and don't use the wrong pronouns intentionally.” Leigh says to comfort the girl sitting across from her, giving herself a hard time. 

“Ok,” Becca relaxes her shoulders. “But um yeah, what do you think? Is it bad that I'm going out with them? I mean, yeah, we sort of met at the group but we didn't start talking until we matched on a dating app. I completely didn't recognize them on their profile until we met in person.” Leigh asks if you recognized her on the app and Becca laughs. “They did! They said that's why they felt comfortable asking me out like an hour after we matched and they thought I recognized them too. We had a laugh about it. They're really great, I think the two of you would get along if you wanted more friends.” 

Leigh plasters on a fake smile as she tries to ignore the pain this conversation is causing her. She cannot believe that you started to date Becca without telling her when you knew the two of them are friends. “How long have you been going out?” 

“Oh we’ve been going on what he calls 'intentional dates' once a week every week this month but we hang out all of the time. Except when either of us is busy, which they tend to be. But it's okay, they send me cute messages when we're apart. We haven't been physical yet though, we kiss a lot but when I try to make it more, he stops anything from happening. Oh no, you don't think he might be gay do you?” She has a hand over her chest as she worries about what the lack of a physical connection could mean.

Leigh shakes her head as she sips her tea. “No, I'm sure they're trying to be respectful. I mean, your husband died while serving in the military and they have a band that hardly anyone has ever heard of. It can be intimidating,” she reassures her friend while subtly correcting her. Leigh wonders how often Becca messes up when it comes to how you identify. Leigh never fucks that up and doesn't know how people do. Right now, she can't even figure out what you see in this girl. Sure, Leigh knows you're dating around. But as far as she knew, they were meaningless dates that never got anywhere. She didn't consider what it would be like if you actually found someone that you were interested in. Leigh picks up her phone and sends a risky photo she has been debating for sometime on whether or not she should ever send it to you and adds the message, I need you tonight.

“You are so right, Leigh. They don’t know about how bad my marriage was before my husband died. Maybe I should make the first move!” Becca suggests and that sends images to Leigh’s head that upsets her. She doesn’t want to share you with her. She doesn’t want to share you with anyone. Especially since the two of you have been talking about maybe having more sex without a condom. She wanted to feel you coming inside of her but now she can’t have that if you’re seeing someone exclusively. She probably can’t have you at all if you continue to date Becca. Then Becca gets a message and her grin disappears. “Awe bummer, they canceled our date for tonight,” she frowns. 

“Oh no, did they say why?” Leigh sips her tea as she poorly hides her enjoyment. 

“Yeah, they have band practice. They’re going to let me know when they can reschedule.” She sets her phone on the table. “You don’t think they might be pulling away because they’re intimidated by my dead husband right?”

Leigh shakes her head, “Becca, you’re overthinking it. Have they ever given you reason to worry they’re not being truthful?” 

“No,” Becca says as she thinks about it for a moment. “Well, other than the mark he had on our first date. It was like right here and I thought it was a hickey but he said he got it when wrestling with one of their bandmates.” 

Leigh clenches her jaw as she remembers making that mark. How could you lie to her friend like that? To someone who is so trusting and sees the best in people. Then she gets a reply from you stating that you’re free tonight and will make dinner so they have something to eat after. The both of you know it’s against the rules to share a meal so close to having sex. Since the arrangement was friends with benefits, it wasn’t against the rules to share a meal and they have shared many friendly meals. She has even had you over for a meal with her mom and sister a few times. But when it was shared after having sex at night, it left the option of her falling asleep and spending the night again. Which she already did last night. After the first time that happened and she woke up comfortable and in your arms, she freaked out and didn't talk to you for two weeks and that's when it became a rule. It has only happened a couple times since but you always make sure you're up before she is. 

Leigh knows she's breaking many rules with that picture and request, and she knows that you know it as well. The fact that you don't seem to mind it at all gives Leigh a warm feeling inside. She is the person you would rather spend your time with. “What’s that smile for? Do you have a hot date tonight?” Becca asks as she finishes her tea. 

“What?” Leigh breaks from her thoughts and drops her smile. “No, I just, no. Um look at the time, we better get to the studio. I'm the instructor, I can't be late to my own class.” Leigh gathers her things and Becca follows as she gets ready to leave as well. 

When Leigh arrives at your apartment, she is wearing the sexiest outfit she could find in her sister's closet. Jules was more than happy to lend the outfit and bit her tongue in asking too many questions, she was having fun dressing her sister up. It was another rule broken. Never dress up for sex. It's just sex, come as you are. She was starting to worry that she has broken too many rules by now. No more than one meeting within 48-hours. No sleepovers, unless absolutely necessary. No nudes. No meals together after sex. No jealousy. No preventing the other from getting into a relationship, unless absolutely necessary. No feelings, just sex. But the look you have when you open that door says it all. You don't care about the rules anymore. She wonders if you ever have. 

Leigh greets you with a kiss, it's slow and deep. Unusual to the heated rushed ones you're used to. But you don't mind the change. “I have to say, that picture was quite the surprise,” you start as you guide her to the bedroom. 

“So was your tongue this morning,” Leigh says as she bites her lip. “I thought you deserved a gift as a thank you.” 

You hum, “Well, I didn't need one but it is very appreciated.” You walk her towards the bed with your hands on her hips. “You look stunning tonight, you rule breaker,” you have your lips on her neck as the two of you fall on the bed. 

Leigh lets out a soft giggle in acknowledgement. “You noticed?”

“Of course I noticed, you practically gave me an exam on the rules before the first time we slept together. Well… technically the second time. The first time was an oopsy that got us to the rules.” You lightly remind her as you continue to kiss her body. You love her tastes and her sounds and the way she knows your body like no one ever has before. “What drove you to this?” 

“Don't worry about it, let's just focus on making each other feel good,” Leigh says as she reaches between the two of you to stroke your cock. You don't argue or question her. You rock your hips into her hand until you have to pull away from her to undress. Leigh rises from the bed as you sit next to her and start pulling your pants down. Once your shirt is off, Leigh stands in front of you and when you're not paying attention to her she lifts your chin with her finger. “Watch me,” she says as she kisses your lips. 

You are surprised by her again. Leigh starts to do a little strip tease for you. Pulling her clothing off slower than she ever has before. The way she sways her body around and removes the clothing is unpracticed and a little goofy but you don't laugh, you sit there and stroke your penis as you watch her. You lick your lips as you think about being inside of her again. There isn't anything else on your mind but being with Leigh right now. 

However, Leigh is stressing herself out. She can't tell if you're enjoying her little routine or if you think she is being ridiculous. She rushes the ending of her little performance, thinking what Becca might do in this situation. She isn't sure, she doesn't know if Becca would be a slow and patient lover or a fast paced “let's get this over with” lover. Maybe she has kinks and fetishes. Maybe she's vanilla… Leigh can be pretty vanilla. Did you like that? Did you find her boring? Is that why you continue to date even though you have a sexual relationship with her? “Fuck, that was hot,” you whisper as she presses her naked body to yours, breaking her from her spiraling thoughts. You crawl back further on the bed, pulling her with you, and lean against the headboard. “I should have woken you up with a morning cunnilingus ages ago if this is the thanks I would've gotten,” you kiss her and Leigh smiles for a second until she reminds herself why she is acting this way. 

Leigh is on a mission to make you see that you don't need Becca when you have her. No feelings. The rules echo in her head. This is just sex and friendship, nothing more. She tries to remind herself. At the moment she can't figure out how she ended up in this arrangement in the first place. Maybe it was something to do with that thing Becca mentioned to her about being touch starved. Maybe it was finding out that Matt had an emotional affair with his colleague. She could blame the arrangement on being a young widow and not wanting to give her heart to someone yet. Gosh she was a broken record lately. No wonder you were looking for something or more so someone more stable. 

Your lips bring her back to the moment as you travel her body. “You’re so beautiful,” the compliment warns her heart, you don't normally compliment her so much. And under different circumstances, she might have left and not called you for a week but she loves how soft you're being with her right now. She hadn't realized how sweet you are until the thought of losing you started to become a reality. 

“Let’s take it slow tonight,” she whispers as she lets go of the manic energy she came in with. 

“Okay,” you caress her cheek as you agree. She leans into your touch as you do. You move your fingers under her chin and guide her into a slow kiss. She melts against you as your lips move together. You swiftly move the two of you so that you're on top of her. “Lay on your stomach,” you say. Leigh makes a face. “Just trust me.” 

“Alright,” she flips onto her stomach and pulls the pillows under her arms to prop herself up comfortably. The mattress creeks as you leave the bed to retrieve the massage oil and Leigh lifts her head up. “What are you doing?” 

“I’m going to give you a massage,” you say as you return with the oil. You straddle her legs, your cock laying against her soft bottom, rubbing the oil on your hands before you start to spread it in her back. You are slow and careful with where you apply pressure. Leigh has never been given a massage as part of sex before and she wasn't sure how she felt about it yet. She couldn't deny that it felt good though, you really seemed to know what you were doing. As you rub her shoulders, you start to kiss her neck and as you move your hands lower, your lips and body follow. 

You take a moment to rub and massage her butt cheeks then move onto her thighs. She started to hum as her body was a little sore from the classes she had to teach earlier. Leigh hadn't realized how much she needed this massage until she had your magic hands on her. Then as you're rubbing the back of her thigh, she feels your tongue inside of her and she lifts her head up again in surprise. She had gotten so lost in the other sensations that she forgot for a moment what the two of you were doing. 

You only move your tongue inside of her for a minute or two before you return your focus to the massage. “Lay on your back now,” you say as you are now standing in front of the bed. Leigh flips over again, relaxing into the mattress in a way she never has before. You grab her left foot and start kneading it with your thumbs, following it with circular motions. Leigh wasn't someone that liked her feet touched in a sexual context but it's been forever since she's had a foot massage and the way you were doing it surprisingly wasn't turning her off. She's grateful when you don't kiss her feet. 

You grab the towel you had brought with you and wipe the excess oil off of your hands. You crawl your way back up Leigh's body, stopping for a moment to kiss her pussy. You trace patterns on her skin with your tongue that send chills up her spine. She worries that it's about her too much and that she isn't doing anything to pleasure you but her thoughts leave her mind again as you latch your mouth on her breast with your fingers inside of her. She moves her hands from her sides to touch you as you continue to make her feel everything. She starts with running her fingers through your hair. It was longer than when she met you since you wanted to grow it out this year. She wasn't sure how this length would look on you but as it's grown, she hasn't had a single complaint. Then as your mouth moves across her chest, her hands move down your back. She can't massage you nearly as well as you had done for her but she does what she can and you appreciate the effort. 

When you're done paying attention to her breasts, you pull your fingers out of Leigh. You trace her lips with the coated fingertips until you dip them in her mouth and she licks them clean. Your dick twitches at the sight. You kiss her on the mouth as you line yourself up at her entrance. You move the head of your penis up and down between her wet folds to prolong the action and then you reach for the condom on the nightstand. 

“No,” Leigh stops you as she covers your hand with hers. “I don't want anything between us tonight,” she says. Always wear a condom, no matter what. 

You nod, “Okay.” 

You press into her entrance slowly and it's like she's feeling you for the first time. Like really feeling you. Not just riding you to get her climax. This isn't a drunken decision like the actual first time. This isn't just something that the two of you are doing to pass the time. This is real. The two of you are making love. This isn't fucking. This isn't just sex. It's slow and intimate and passionate. It's something that she wants for as long as she can have you. Leigh doesn't want to lose you to some other girl. 

As the two of you make love, she decides that she isn't going to be afraid anymore. She is going to tell you how she feels about this arrangement and she hopes that you'll feel the same. As she gets closer to her climax her mind is wiped clean, not a thought haunts her as she chants, “Oh god, oh god, oh god,” over and over again. Anticipating her walls squeezing your penis so close to your own orgasm, you start to pull away from her, planning on having her finish on your mouth. But Leigh has other plans as you pull away, she locks her legs around your back, keeping you inside of her. 

“Leigh, I won’t be able to hold off,” you warn her. 

She kisses your mouth, “It’s okay, I want you inside.” Her words trigger the two of you to share the most euphoric orgasms either of you has ever had in your lives. You've never released inside of someone without a condom before and the feeling was like nothing you've ever experienced before. As for Leigh, she is enjoying every pulse of your penis as you empty your balls into her. 

“Fuck, Leigh. What's gotten into you?” You pant out the question with a laugh as the two of you calm down. Once you start to soften, you pull out and roll next to her. Leigh is quick to roll on top of you, laying against your chest as you catch your breath. 

“Nothing, just a thank you,” she replies as she snuggles against you. Holding you as close as she can. No cuddles or snuggles or any physical touch unless it's related to sex. Leigh tries to get her brain working again so she can tell you how she feels but she's also enjoying being in your presence and relaxing in the moment. 

Unfortunately, there isn't a lot of time before your phone starts going off. You grab it from the nightstand and sigh with a frown. “I’m sorry, Leigh. I have to take this.” You kiss her on the lips while you pull away from her. Leigh wraps herself in your blanket as she watches you leave the room. You hop on one foot at a time as you put your basketball ball shorts on and answer the phone. “Hey cutie, what's up? Yeah, it's going great. Yeah, I'm sorry I couldn't tonight. But maybe we can do something tomorrow night?” You say as you walk away. 

Leigh scoffs, she couldn't believe what she was overhearing. You had just came inside of her and you were making plans with Becca. Bubbly, positive, happy, pretty Becca. Not complicated and upfront with her feelings, Becca. Perfect widow, Becca. She gets out of the bed as she becomes blind with rage. She feels so used. Clearly breaking the rules wasn't enough to keep your attention. You still wanted her and not Leigh. 

She angrily grabs her clothes off of the floor and when you return she is almost fully dressed. “What's wrong, Leigh?” You say as you notice how upset she is. 

“You!” she snaps. 

“What?” Leigh storms past you and you follow her. “Leigh, talk to me, please.” You try to get ahead of her before she can get to the door but the apartment is small and she has it swung open before you can push it closed. “Leigh, please, tell me what I did wrong!” You beg as you continue to chase her. It didn't make any sense, she was holding onto you. She let you cum inside of her. She sent you that picture. She was so happy five seconds ago. It couldn't have been the call, you've taken them a couple times before. One time she even answered the phone for you and sucked you off while you chatted with the girl. This doesn't make any sense. 

“You had to start dating my best friend! Didn't you? What? One widow wasn't enough to have on your roster? You had to have two?” She shouts as she spins in front of you. 

“Oh shit,” you stand there dumbly as you realize she knows about Becca. “Leigh, I'm sorry. I didn't think it would be a big deal. And best friend? Really?” She narrows her eyes at you. 

“So not the point,” she starts through gritted teeth as she stops and spins to look at you, “she is still my friend. That's so low of you to put in this position!”

“Shit,” you shut your eyes as you understand where she's coming from now. “Leigh, please, come inside and let's talk about this.”

“Are you going to stop seeing her?” 

“What?”

“It’s a simple yes or no question. Are you going to stop seeing Becca?” She asks again. 

“I don't know,” you deflate. “Becca is the first person, other than you, who seems to get me. We connect well and she's sweet and considerate and goofy and if I'm honest, I kind of like hanging out with her. It's not easy dating these days.” 

“Do you want to get serious with her?” Leigh asks. 

You haven't really given it much thought. You were just enjoying your time with Becca right now. In a similar way you were enjoying your time with Leigh. “I don't know,” you shrug. “Maybe? But what do you care?”

“What do I care? Do you really think I'm so heartless?” Leigh says back. “I care because I’m in love with you! You fucking idiot!” Leigh freezes and her angry expression drops as her blood runs cold in her body. She doesn't give you a moment to respond or even process. Leigh gets in her car and leaves. This time, you don't chase after her. 

Leigh knew she wanted an exclusive relationship but she didn't know how deep her feelings ran. Is she ready to be in love with someone? She isn't sure. Not after the rollercoaster that was Matt and his secrets. You and her were a secret and you kept it so well. Can she even trust you? Do you trust her?

Her phone ringing snaps her out of her thoughts for a second. She knows it's you. She can't answer. This is not an easy situation by any means and she needs to distance herself from you. Figure out how she really feels and maybe you will do the same. There's a chance she could lose you for good. Lose you to Becca. But that could be a good thing for both of you. 

Your phone calls don't stop for the rest of the night. The next day it's text messages and the day after, it's nothing. You finally go silent and Leigh is both relieved and terrified. She has no idea what you're thinking right now. She has no idea how you feel. She cannot believe she said those words to you. What was she thinking? She wasn't. 

The next week she receives a few messages from you, asking to talk, but she never responds. Leigh isolates herself from everyone she knows just in case you try to go to them to get to her. She doesn't hang out with Becca because she cannot stand to hear how great things are between the two of you. Or how horrible things are. Either way, she doesn't want to know. When her mom and Jules try to ask her what's wrong, she avoids the subject and they figure that she's having another “Matt episode” and they leave her be. 

Leigh decides to visit her husband's grave and think about the life they could have had. Would she be in his arms right now while he thought of another woman? Would he have left her for this woman? Or was it a crush that would have faded? Would he ever come around to the idea of kids? Or would that have been their breaking point? Did they get married too young? Did they move too fast? She has so many unanswered questions about their relationship, and he isn't here to help her figure them out. Not that him being here would have been much help. There are so many questions surrounding you and instead of talking to you, she's hoping that ghosting you will keep you away. 

Another week goes by and this time she doesn't hear from you at all. More silence. But there is no peace in it. She can't keep going like this. She wants to call you but she's scared. At least this way, the only person that gets hurt is her. You and Becca can be living happily ever after with each other and she will try to find something simple and easy. The weekend that her mom is away at a retreat and Jules is spending the night at her current girlfriends house, Leigh invites Drew to go out. She drinks and dances and flirts until she finds someone to go home with. It gets hot and heavy and she sloppily makes out with this person, trying to get their clothes off. Except, it doesn't go past the intense kissing because she breaks down into tears. She falls apart in the strangers apartment and they are nice enough to allow her the space to let it out. She ends up passing out there and they let Leigh sleep it off in their bed and they move to the coach. They drop her off at her house early the next morning. 

“Leigh,” your voice is broken and you wake to her slamming the car door shut. Leigh’s face is a mess from sleeping and crying in her makeup but that's not what you're thinking when you set your eyes on her.  You startle her as she climbs the porch steps. “Oh,” you say as you put two and two together. Leigh's hair and outfit are all out of sorts and you remember seeing her like that after a night with you. “Okay then, I'm clearly wasting my time here,” you rise and stretch your stiff limbs, sore from sleeping next to the front door, and wipe yourself off. “I’m sorry, I'll leave you alone.”

Leigh watches you in shock, you're standing in front of her. You're a mess and you're here. She has images in her head of what you would look like by now. Clean and happy and waking up to a nice warm breakfast with Becca. Not here. Not waiting for her all night. “What are you doing here?” The words come out harder than intended and she wants to rewind but it's too late. 

You scoff, “Making a fool of myself, clearly.” You start to walk away but Leigh reaches for your wrist to stop you and you do. It's been far too long without her touch and even this little bit is more than enough to get you to fall apart. 

“I’m sorry, I panicked,” she says in a small voice with her head down. You sigh as you fight against your better judgment. She has a hold on you that you didn't realize was there until you almost lost it. Or maybe you have lost it. You don't know yet. “I’m not good at this. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do.”

You aren't sure if she means that she's not good at ending things or if she's not good at fixing them. You look over at your car and think about the night you ended things with Becca. You still weren't certain if you felt the same way about Leigh or if you had those feelings for Becca so you had to see for yourself. You continued to talk with her after the whole thing with Leigh but you kept your distance. Then you finally took her on a date, ready to end the night in bed with her but throughout the evening you noticed how you had to force yourself to continue a conversation or even pay attention to one of her stories. It was natural with Leigh. When you tried to sneak a taste of her food she got weird and territorial about it, surprisingly Leigh never did. Whatever you thought you had with Becca before Leigh's confession was gone and you realized that the only person you wanted to be with was Leigh. So when you dropped Becca off at her apartment and she tried to kiss you, you stopped her and told her that you had a complicated thing with someone else and that you couldn't continue with Becca anymore. She took it very hard. She was in tears and she couldn't believe that you had strung her along the way you did. You tried to tell her it wasn't like that but it didn't do any good. It was hard to end things with her but it was what was best for the both of you. 

Now you have to work it out with Leigh. Well, either you work it out or you have to let her go. “Just talk to me, Leigh. You tell me that you love me and then you run away. I've been worried sick for weeks and you wouldn't talk to me!” You pull your wrist out of her grasp and pace between her and the front door. Pulling on your already messy hair. “Then I come here and wait all night for you to let me in and you're off fucking someone else!” You stop in front of Leigh with red eyes and tears at the brim. “Am I stupid for being here?”

“No,” Leigh says as a wave of sadness hits her. Her lips quiver and she drops her shoes to grab your shirt to pull you close to her. “No, you're not stupid. I'm so sorry,” you let her lean against you, but you don't wrap your arms around her yet. Leigh sighs, happy to feel you again. “Gosh, I've missed you,” she whispers into your chest. “I didn't have sex with that person. I tried to but I didn't want to. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have ghosted you. I should have stayed. I'm sorry. Is it too late?” She pulls back enough to look at you. 

Looking in her eyes, she is being sincere and vulnerable and you've never fallen for anyone harder than you are right now. You know that things won't always be easy with Leigh. But she is worth it. You wrap your arms around her and bring her into a warm embrace. You feel your heartbeat against you and it heals the cracks in your heart. “No, it's not too late.” You hold her. “But I do think we need to start over.”

“Okay, yeah,” she nods and sniffles. “Whatever you want. I'll do it. I just want to be with you,” she holds you tighter. 

“I just want to be with you,” you say as you step back and pull her into a passionate kiss. It didn’t matter to you that she had a bad morning breath with a hint of whatever alcohol she consumed the night before. And your morning breath didn’t affect her either. In fact, she wanted more of you. But you pull away before she can deepen the kiss and rest your forehead against hers. “Will you let me take you out on a proper date, Leigh Shaw?” 

“Yes, I will,” the two of you kiss again.

The End.

[natashaslittlegirl]

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[therunawaykind]

don't wanna break up again

Pairing: Leigh Shaw x GN!Reader

Word Count: 3.8k

Genre: Pinch of angst? fluff

Warnings: None unless you hate the names Leigh & Danny in the same sentence quite a bit

A/N: Long time no see! (again) writer's block and just simply getting the inspiration and motivation to write have been fucking dreadful these last few months. I dunno what was going on. Hopefully, all things going well this is my slow return to posting regularly again on here. If not then whoops you'll see me again at some stage. Who would've thought Leigh Shaw and Ariana Granda was gonna be my breakthrough for writing stuff not me that's for sure. This is my very loose interpretation of Ariana Grande's 'don't wanna break up again' I saw someone say it was very Leigh x Danny coded then this transpired. I hope I have done this some justice I imagine my writing abilities are a bit rusty so bear with me and I hope you all enjoy!

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*Please do not repost or translate my material or claim as yours. reblogs, comments and likes are always appreciated!*

If there was one thing Leigh was certain of since Matt’s death it was how complicated and difficult her life had become, ranging from devastating revelations to do with Matt and his teacher co-worker Nina, living with a Jules who is now a recovering sober alcoholic, dealing with her mother Amy with her previous breakdown she had where she moved to Alaska which subsequently led to her breakthrough of wanting to travel and basically just live somewhere else that wasn’t in Los Angeles, that wasn’t home.

In addition to that after Leigh’s breakdown after choosing to leave with Jules to go to Vietnam, she ultimately decided just to stay living in their family home whilst both Jules and her mother left for however long they decided. Leigh also decided to take over Beautiful Beast for Jules until she was ready to come back…if she ever did but nonetheless she couldn’t let all of Jules’ hard work go to waste. And last but not least the absolute travesty that of her and Danny whatever that thing is, it’s complicated, messy and above all else unhealthy all over for the both of them. Not to delve too much into the ups and downs of their….thing the latest situation ended up with Danny punching a hole in the wall of Leigh’s home, to sum it up in a simple phrase “People don’t slam their fists through walls when things are going well.”

The one positive and healthy yet still slightly complicated thing in Leigh’s life which happened unexpectedly was well… Y/N. Granted one of the only aspects that made it complicated was the fact you were her “student”, you both met due to you attending Leigh’s classes at Beautiful Beast, the friendship, and conversations which ended up evolving into more flirtatious conversations did just happen out of nowhere unexpectedly. The downfall of the whole friendship between you both was when Danny surprised Leigh at the entrance of Beautiful Beast one night to take her home…then you caught Danny kissing her which again took Leigh by surprise. That night and predicament in question had truly shocked Leigh because from what she knew and understood during that time, it was during one of her and Danny’s off moments, their pause a break essentially.

But in good Leigh fashion the second she saw Danny she started overthinking and thought she interpreted something wrong or missed a certain something, whilst simultaneously thinking this was Danny offering an olive branch and showing her they really can make this work, they can be good and healthy for each other….how wrong she was. So understandably from then on you started to distance yourself and pull away from Leigh after that by not talking, hanging out or texting as much. Unbeknownst to Leigh any hope you had of having some sort of relationship with her plummeted very quickly after that. 

Leigh knew whatever they had going on wasn’t good for either of them and would never last, it was a cycle they couldn’t break….well she couldn’t break. It was a lifeline for them both, the last small bit of connection they both had to Matt in some way. On one hand, Leigh had this negative and toxic relationship that she couldn’t leave, she couldn’t escape it. Somehow it always kept dragging her back in no matter how many times night and day it had her distraught, crying and attempting to soothe herself. On the other hand, Leigh had this seemingly hopeful, positive and healthy relationship she could have with you.

But before she even tried to give that relationship a chance she had to try to get out of this fucking cycle she couldn’t seem to get out of and no matter how hard she tried. Whenever she asked Jules for advice on the relationship, much to nobody's surprise always went something like this. 

“Leigh you need to end this thing with Danny and go no contact with him at least for some time, this is not healthy for either of you. I mean come on Leigh he punched a hole in the wall at our house. Let me remind you when I was living with you Leigh after mom left, just how many times I’d hear quiet sobs from your room, you talking to yourself to make yourself feel better and reassure yourself everything was going to be okay, that everything was gonna be fine. And I couldn’t get in because 1. You’d lock the door, 2. You wouldn’t respond when I asked if you were okay and lastly, when you did,  you’d just say you were fine, you were okay. Once one of you starts to feel happier and healthier the other drags the other one down simply just by being around.

I know you don’t want to go through another break-up or heartbreak….but you’re doing it to yourself constantly by staying in this with Danny or maybe…. You keep going back to this thing with Danny because you don’t want to hurt him and his heart completely. And if you do fully disappear from his life because to him you're his last link to Matt and right now you know full well you are leading him on and have him believing you two can have some semblance of a future together no matter how complicated it may be. I know this is a weird way to word it but… I think you know Matt wouldn’t want or like Danny to be experiencing this level of hurt and anguish as much as he is, not even specifically with you just with anyone.

But let’s not forget just how much you did hurt Danny initially when he was staying away from you and you wouldn’t let it happen. You forced your way into his life because you needed him to love you. Who knows maybe some ways down the line in the future when you’re both fully healed or at least somewhat…you two can be friends and have that last link to Matt. But also do remember that doesn’t mean you have to stop contact with Matt’s mother…. You can still have a link to him in some shape and form.”

That’s what she’d deal with, she knew and understood completely what Jules was saying yet she couldn’t bring herself to do it….unfortunately. She wishes Danny would end up being the person to end it but the chances of that happening are slim to none. But with the possibilities that awaited her on the other side of things…she knew what she had to do, end things with Danny then she had to get the friendship with Y/N back to what it was, and she had to show you that you weren't going to be just some rebound, that she saw a future with this relationship she saw it going the distance. 

When she thought about the aspects of the relationship she had with Y/N the only way Leigh could describe how she felt…was how she felt when she was with Matt. With you, it finally felt like Leigh had gotten the best and good part of herself back that as Leigh put it Matt had taken with him when he died. It felt like she could finally breathe again and live her life to the fullest. Fortunately for Leigh yet quite sadly when the friendship between you both was at its best Matt left her alone, and Leigh’s recurring what she would consider nightmares of Matt and Nina living out the life she lived with him finally stopped.

Now all she had to do was start the process and uncomplicate her life which starts with talking to Danny.

As Leigh anxiously approaches the door to the apartment she knows so well, she nervously wrings out her hands and fingers. She had texted Danny the night before asking him if would it be okay for her to visit in the morning to talk to him, as Danny eagerly agreed to her calling over she realised at that very moment he was expecting a very different conversation. She hesitantly starts knocking on the door muttering to herself “You can do this, you can do this. You have to do this for yourself, Danny and everyone else in your life but most importantly you and Danny.” After a few seconds, shuffling could be heard behind the door as Leigh took a deep breath in, in an attempt to calm herself down and get all of her feelings under control.

Once the door opened a weak nervous smile spread across her face, Leigh quickly scans Danny trying to figure out how he really is, as she sees him start to step out and lean in to give her a quick kiss but before anything of the sort can happen Leigh quickly steps in and gives him a quick hug as she states “so is it alright for me to come in?” as she smiles quickly at him. Danny’s face scrunches up in confusion as Leigh quickly pats his stomach as she steps past him into his apartment, he lets out an exasperated sigh and throws his head back slightly and he turns around to walk into his apartment closing the door behind him. 

When Danny finally turns to face Leigh he can’t help but notice her looking around his apartment and the constant nervous fidgeting with her fingers, her hair and her neck. He sighs to himself “Alright Leigh what is this about you said you wanted to talk.” 

Leigh jumps slightly as she spins around to face him “ I- well- yeah you’re right I did, I did.” rubbing her now sweaty palms off of the side of her jeans and slowly sits herself down on Danny's sofa. Taking a deep breath in and bringing her hands up to her mouth “I- I can imagine from the way I’m acting and just how difficult it is for me to start this conversation and say what I actually want to….that you already know what this conversation is about and where it’s heading.” Hearing a quiet sigh beside her Leigh glances quickly out the side of her eye seeing Danny leaning forward slightly with his head down and forearms leaning on his knees. “But Danny this thing has to be stopped, I- we’re both hurting each other continuously whether we realise it or not. I mean need I remind ourselves of the punching a hole in the wall situation.”

That got a small chuckle out of Danny as he shook his head slightly clicking his tongue. “And I mean it wasn’t just you Danny, I forced you to be around me when you didn’t want to, in our own little ways, we were selfish when it came to this situation. Now I know I stated and promised you before that I would never have a life that didn’t have you in it…but whilst we’re both still healing and dealing with our grief that obviously still hasn’t gone anywhere. We do really need to not be in each other's lives anymore, no contact, no talking in any shape or form no stupid lil emoji texts anymore.” 

Biting his lip and sitting back Danny exclaims “But Leigh that’s EXACTLY what you’re doing, you’re leaving, you’re having a life without me! You obviously think and believe you don’t need me!” 

“I’M NOT LEAVING YOU, I’M NOT HAVING A LIFE WITHOUT YOU”

“LEIGH THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT YOU’RE DOING CAN YOU NOT HEAR WHAT YOU’RE SAYING” 

“DANNY!” scoffing to herself and shaking her head as she calmly states ”See this, this here exactly happening right now is why we need to take a step back from each other. We can’t even have a normal conversation without blowing up and ending up yelling at each other. The only time we aren’t killing each other is when we’re having sex and- and even then since we had that conversation in that casino resort we both know Matt is still weirdly on our minds during that. I- I think no matter how much we try or maybe want some sort of actual loving relationship with each other…it’ll never work. The only thing we ever can be to each other is friends.” Leigh shakes her head and licks her lips slightly “Just a friendship. Because we are hurting each other and ourselves from the inside out. We have to heal by ourselves, without the other in our lives and move on. And hopefully at some stage down the line whenever we’re both happy and healthy we can get back in contact with the other.”

Leigh smirks as she sways from side to side “Cause I can’t lie Danny I think we’d be pretty kick-ass friends together don’t ya think.” She grins as she nudges Danny with her shoulder, clearing his throat and nodding “Yeah- yeah I think we would be. And I can’t lie I get what you’re saying I understand hell I see it completely. It- it is just a difficult thing to let go of even if it is just for a little bit.” 

Biting her lip and rubbing Danny’s arm “I get it, Danny I do believe me but you still have your mom. You both can get through this together because it was just as difficult for her to… You are all she has left. And I’ll- I'm staying in contact with her or at this stage more like getting in contact with her more considering she still is my mother-in-law or ex-mother-in-law anyways specifics isn’t the important thing here.” 

Danny laughs slightly and nods “Yeah, yeah she’d like that.” Both sit back against the sofa in silence basking in the reality of what now has to be undertaken the reality of it hitting them simultaneously. Rubbing her hands anxiously up and down her legs as she slowly drags out “rigghtt I guess- I guess I better go now and leave us both to our journey of healing, growth whatever you wanna call it.” Leigh laughs as she mumbles to herself “god I sound like my mother” She walks to the door with Danny right behind her as Leigh opens the door she turns around and smiles at Danny as they both embrace each other in a hug for the last time till…who knows how long. Both pulling away slowly and giving each other a subtle nod as Leigh steps out through the door as it closes behind her softly. Leigh takes a deep breath in, the grin spreading across her face going unnoticed by her as she starts to descend the steps of the apartment building.

Leigh was never nervous or anxious when it came to teaching her exercise classes though apparently today was the exception, as she anticipated your arrival. Leigh smiles moving back and forth on her feet as she greets all of the students walking in through the door to her class, anxiously waiting to get a glimpse of your bag, shoes or something as you come through the front door. Considering since you distanced yourself from her she’s noticed you haven’t attended classes all that regularly. Leigh’s eyebrows raise in anticipation as she sees the front doors open happily letting out a breath she didn’t realise she was holding as she saw a glimpse of your bag and shoes come into view. Giddily she lets a grin spread across her face and she nervously picks at her nails seeing you approach the entrance “Hey Y/N it’s nice to see you again, I’m glad you decided to attend and come today.” 

Taken aback by Leigh's greeting and striking up a proper conversation with you after so long did genuinely take you by surprise but couldn’t stop the smile on your face “Hey Leigh, yeah I can’t lie I missed attending these classes I’m sure I’ll get back on track from now on.” Both smiling at each other as you walk past her into the class much to Leigh’s amazement you turn around and say to her “Leigh if I can just say you look great...you just look happy and healthy. Whatever you’ve done or are doing keep it up it suits you.” With her mouth wide open Leigh messily nods and stutters out “I- I will- I-  Thank you very much, I will be sure to keep it up.” Leigh turns around to the door to hide and mutters to herself “Idiot”.

Much to her relief though the class was a success and she didn’t stumble or trip over any more of her words whenever she got closer to you throughout her class as she moved around the room. After the class finished Leigh quickly grabbed her towel off the floor wiping the sweat off of her as she said goodbye to everyone, in her peripheral vision she could see you deliberately taking your sweet ass time packing away all of your stuff. Biting her lip she attempted to suppress the smile taking over her face. 

As she said goodbye to one of the last students she sauntered across the room towards you as she started fiddling with the towel around her neck. “Sooo Y/N” you glanced up at her as you were putting on your shoes “What's up Leigh?” 

She smiles at you abashedly as she scratches her head “I just wanna say sorry and give you a quick apology for anything I said or did that created that distance and made us pull away from each other. Because- because for that length of time, I really did miss seeing you and your face around here but I’m glad to see you back now.” Nervously scratching the back of your neck “Yeah umm I just-” shaking your head slightly as you let out a breath “I just had some stuff I had to figure out and work on to clear my head a bit and- unfortunately, sadly to do that I kinda had to step away and distance myself from you and well all things relating to you. But I- I think I’ve figured it all out now.” 

You can’t help but notice the hopeful glint in Leigh’s eyes and smile “Oh really? A positive figure it out I hope?” 

Grinning and nodding confidently “Yeah- yeah it does seem that way.” Both of you stare at each other smiling to your heart's content as both of your eyes scan the other person. You clear your throat as you can feel the heat rising to your cheeks and glance around the room “Anyways I should probably head off and leave you to clean up the place or whatever it is you have left to do around here.”  Leigh absentmindedly nods her head but ultimately starts panicking as you pick up your bag and wave goodbye to her, she quickly sprints after you saying between breaths “Or or- or albeit this isn’t a very nice offer for you to ask-” you raise your eyebrow at her “What is it, Leigh?”

“Um, do you wanna hang out here with me and help me out around here if you aren’t busy? I just- I’ve just missed hanging out and talking with you and thought this might be a nice way for us to catch up.”

“Y’know you are right it isn’t the nicest or most glamorous offer I’ve ever heard but I have missed talking to you Leigh so I’ll stick around and help my favourite fitness instructor out.” 

Leigh whips her head around to face you and stumbles slightly as she starts moving the spare barres placed around the room “Wha- what do you mean favourite fitness instructor? I’m your only fitness instructor.” Smirking over at Leigh as you roll up the extra yoga mats “That you know of, could’ve tried out other places whilst I was MIA” 

“HEY!” Leigh exclaims as she throws a cloth at you 

Laughing at her reaction as you catch the cloth “I’m messing, I’m messing you would be correct, you are the only fitness instructor I know and one that I go to.” You hear a quiet yet stern “good” in response as she goes back to cleaning, laughing and shaking your head in the process.

Since then you and Leigh have practically been inseparable, it was as if nothing had ever happened. She had explained to you fully what went and was going on with her and Danny currently..more like what wasn’t going on. Even though you had said to her repeatedly she didn’t have to that it was none of your business. But you reassured her it was for the better, she made the right decision, she’s doing better because of it and you could only hope the same for Danny. Leigh now had you over at her house….for what she told you would be a quiet night in with both of your favourite takeout foods and as many movies and TV shows as you both could handle.

Which now that you were here was not the case at all. Leigh had gotten the bright idea, the brainwave or as she put it a breakthrough. She felt that the whole house needed to be redecorated and refurnished as it reminded her of sad, difficult and complicated times and she couldn’t stand being reminded of those moments any longer. So who were you to say no to helping her out yet again. As you were sat on the floor dismantling all of the old furniture with Leigh, you saw her peak her head out from the other side “Again I’m sorry about this, it seems like none of my hangouts recently are that exciting and it involves you always having to work.” You laugh and shake your head “Leigh honestly it’s okay I really don’t care what I do as long as it’s with you. But hey it’ll be a nice bonding time for both of us, be a little glimpse of what it’s like if we were to ever live with each other I guess.” You scratch your head and hurriedly get back to dismantling the furniture as you realise what you said. “Did you just say living together?” 

“Psshhh me say that? No never? Must’ve heard things, Leigh.” 

“Mhmm okay sure.” What you didn’t notice was Leigh moving over to you slowly on her knees but jumping slightly as you felt her place her arms on your shoulders in an attempt to get you to raise your head to look at her. Glancing up at her you see the silly little smile on her face “I may not be ready for that yet but I’d like to think we’d end up living together at some stage in the future.” 

Staring at her wide-eyed “R-really?” Leigh grins and nods her head as she whispers against your lips “Really.” Grinning at each other as you both lean in to place kisses on each other's lips which quickly turn into little pecks as Leigh slaps your thigh “Alright let’s get back to work this house isn’t gonna refurnish and redecorate itself. And this furniture certainly won’t dismantle itself.” 

Chuckling to yourself you playfully salute towards Leigh “Aye, aye captain.” 

[messedupfan]

Benefits Of Car Troubles| 8

Summary: After getting settled into the apartment, Leigh asks about Y/n's troubled past and comforts them.

A/n: I should have never done that damn poll. But here it is. A WARNING because y'all voted for SMUT. So, spoiler alert, there's SMUT involve. MINORS DNI this is 18+ content hehe.

Masterlist | All Stories Taglist | All Chapters

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Living with Leigh is different when her family isn’t around. She is less stressed out about how she needs to present herself and how you need to behave. When she comes home from work, she spends a few minutes in the shop talking to your co-workers and getting to know Teddy a little bit better. After having lunch with her and Cameron, her lawyer brother, she started to feel a bit better about your closeness to her. Not great, but better. She hasn’t brought up her discomfort about the friendship to you yet. With her divorce proceedings and drama with her sister, she doesn’t have the energy to come home and fight more. You have become her safe space and she has let you know that everyday. 

After she rests for an hour in the apartment, she cleans up the few messes around and then cooks dinner to have it ready for the both of you since you work later than she does. Then, as she is waiting for you to come upstairs she takes time to write. With learning about your schedule she is amazed that you ever made time to go to writing class and have something prepared for class. She is surprised that you ever had time for her. What she doesn't know is that you have been working extra shifts in order to have money leftover after buying the house. You had enough to cover the down payment, the issue was having enough money to sustain for some time after that. Sure, you could ask your dad for a loan but you'd have no idea when you'll be able to pay him back. Besides the basic expenses, there is moving and baby stuff which you have no idea what you do and don't need. Everything was going to start piling up and you weren't sure if you'll be able to afford all of it. 

“Wow, what smells so good,” you ask as you enter the apartment. Leigh has your small table set with the few plates and utensils that you own. She happily tells you that it's your favorite dish and you don't clean up before devouring the meal. You have been skipping lunch most days to get the extra hours. “This is delicious, babe. Thank you,” you tell her with a full mouth and Leigh shakes her head at your silliness. 

After dinner, you shower and get out of your dirty work clothes. Then you join her in the living room where she is typing away on her laptop. “What are you up to?” You ask as you lift her legs and sit underneath them. You begin to massage her feet because you're sure they're sore with the extra weight she has to carry. 

“Oh that's so good, thank you.” Leigh hums as you work your fingers into her tense foot. “I was working on a story,” she closes her laptop and places it on the coffee table. “But I've hit a dead spot and I'd rather spend my time with you.” 

“Awe I'm sorry, do you want to talk it out? I think I could help you out of it,” you offer as you switch one foot for the other.

Leigh shakes her head then she sits her arm on top of the couch and rests her head against her hand. “I just want to talk with you. We can do that another day.” She rubs her exposed belly with her free hand. 

“Okay, we can do that.” You start by asking about her day and you listen intently as she talks about work and the gossip from the office. You laugh at her sarcastic remarks and little jokes and ask her questions when you're confused or want her to know that you are listening. Then she mentions that she talked to her mom a little bit and you can see that something is bothering her so you ask her to tell you. 

Leigh sighs, she moved from her position halfway through her story about finding two of her co-workers screwing in the copy room. Her legs that were across your lap are now tucked under her and instead of sitting on the other end of the couch, she is sitting on the cushion next to you. “Can I ask you how you knew that Jules wanted to use that money for drugs and not rehab?” 

You take a deep breath as you figure out where to start because you don't like talking about that part of your past. It's something that you've chosen to bury and have been able to avoid telling Leigh about until now. Part of you hoped that you could go forever without ever revealing this time in your life but you knew someday that you would have to. Especially since addiction can be a genetic condition and you would have to explain to her why you plan to be so strict when the baby in her belly reaches their teenage and even their adult years. You were worried that when she met your dad that she would start asking questions but her mind clearly got temporarily distracted by her sister. The situation you had been in too many times in your life. A situation that you swore that you would never experience again. You look at Leigh with a frown and scratch the back of your head. “My mom,” is all you're able to say. Luckily, it's all that you have to say because Leigh pulls you into a tight hug. 

“I'm sorry about whatever experiences that you had with her that makes you talk so little about her,” she says as she holds you. “I'm also kind of relieved that it wasn't you or maybe a complicated ex of yours. I know, that's horrible to say. But,” you shake your head to cut her off.

“No, it's okay. Honey, I'm here for all of your honesty. Good, bad, I want to hear it. No matter what. Okay?” You move her hair out of her face as you look at her. You kiss her lips. “I want to be honest and completely open with you but I’m not ready to talk about my mom. I hope to be someday. Especially before this one,” you rest your hand on her baby bump, “starts high school so that we can give them a proper scare. I don’t want them to make one wrong move that will screw up the rest of their life. I know that after everything with your sister that you’re probably very concerned about that as well.” Leigh nods, confirming that she doesn’t want that for her child. She wasn’t as concerned as she might be now since Jules' genetics aren’t connected to her genetics. But this baby is connected to you and you are connected to your mother. The chances aren’t as likely but there is never any guarantee with this sort of thing. “I don’t want you to worry though, I have faith in us that we won’t let anything like that happen.” 

Leigh runs her fingers through your hair, “I love you.” She kisses you softly. As her lips collide with your’s a hunger begins to build in the pit of her stomach. The kind of hunger that doesn’t require food to satisfy. Only you. Leigh deepens the kiss as you hold onto her. “I miss you,” she says against your lips. You try to pull her off to ask what she means by that but she doesn't move and instead finds a way to answer that question by shoving her hand in your sweatpants. “I miss the way you used to fuck me all over my old house and… this apartment,” she whispers against your ear as she continues to rub you. 

You're reminded of the afternoons when the affair started. She would call the shop and you would escape from work to meet her wherever she wanted. It started with motel rooms that she would arrange but ask you to pay for, which you gladly did. It was just sex at the time. Nothing more than fucking each others brains out. She started off the more dominant of you two but eventually you took on that role once you learned everything that made her squeal. 

As she climbs on your lap and kisses you, memories of when she first invited you to her home flood your mind. You couldn't deny the thrill you felt seeing her framed wedding photos as you made her toes curl. But as she rides you now, you don't miss that feeling. This one, knowing that she wants to be with you, loves you, wants a future and a family. This feeling is better than anything you could have imagined. Being loved instead of used, there is quite a difference. 

You start to rub her clitoris to get her there faster. She has her hands on your shoulders to hold her steady. “Let me take you to the bedroom,” you say against her lips, concerned about her back. She has complained about pain recently with the extra weight she has to carry. 

Leigh shakes her head, “No, I'm fine.” She crosses her arms and removes her shirt. “This is so good,” she smiles down at you before she grabs your face and deeply kisses you. She rolls her hips as you're inside of her causing you to groan. When she stops kissing you, you move your hand from her clitoris and place your hands on her ass to help her bounce on you. She tips her head back as she moans and you move to suck on her neck. Something you used to hold yourself back from to avoid getting caught that now you get the freedom to do. She is yours.

You continue to thrust into her as you move your mouth around her exposed body. From her neck to her shoulder to her collarbone down to her still covered breasts. With your teeth, you pull the fabric down in order to expose her breasts. You are careful with licking her nipples as she has complained about sensitivity earlier in the week. You look up and watch her bite her lips and shut her eyes the way she always does when she is getting close. You smile as you move to the other breast while you continue to thrust deep into her warm pussy. 

“Fuck,” Leigh moans out as you hit a spot inside of her that causes her walls to clench around you. Her moans drive you crazy as you rest your head against her chest to have her breasts rub against your face. The pace of your thrusts slow down as you get closer in order to drag it out a bit longer but she doesn’t want to drag it out. She is ready. She wants your release now. She wants to know that she can still pleasure you and bring you to an orgasm. She wants to feel you lose all control of yourself. She rolls her hips on your lap and with a tight grip on your couch she brings the pace back up until you can’t hold back. 

“Holy shit!” You say as you reach your climax and shoot inside of her. Feeling your release, Leigh reaches her own high. She holds you close to her body as the both of you spasm against each other. “I love you,” you say as you kiss her sweaty cheek. “I can’t even remember the last time we did this,” you say as you start to laugh. She joins you and peppers you with sweet kisses. 

“I’ll be honest, at that last house tour I imagined our life there in an innocent way but… I also imagined us all over that house. Fucking in every room,” she admits as she scrunches her nose in that cute way that she always does. You kiss her nose and call her cute, she hugs you in response. 

Later that night, you are unable to sleep. Leigh is deep asleep and snoring, something that has arrived with the pregnancy. It wasn’t a loud obnoxious snore, it was actually kind of endearing. It’s a snore that you can sleep through, that’s not what is keeping you up. You can’t get your mom out of your head. Most days she never crosses your mind but when she does, you can’t help but worry about her. You wonder if she is even alive, it’s been almost five years since the last time you’ve seen her. You look at Leigh with sad eyes as you push the memory away. You know that, even though it wasn’t planned and this wasn’t the way you ever saw this happening, she is the perfect person for you to have a child with. Leigh is always going to be there for you and the baby. She won’t leave either of you to chase a high. And you will always be there for them. No matter what. 

You lean down and kiss her belly, “I know that we haven’t met yet, but I already love you so much kid.” You rub her stomach softly, careful to not wake her up. “I can’t wait to hold you in my arms. I can’t wait to play with you and guide you.” You smile as you imagine the baby as a real person standing before you someday soon. “I hope I don’t screw you up.” You sigh, and move off of the bed. You weren’t feeling tired at all and instead of wasting that time tossing and turning, you decide to write down the story of your mother. You know that you won’t ever be able to tell it without completely falling apart but hopefully, Leigh will be fine with just reading it. Never discussing it. Maybe one day you share it with your kids when they’re older and start to ask about what your mom was like. 

As you write about your earliest memories of her, a part of you breaks knowing that she might never meet your kids or Leigh. And it’s not because she was taken from this world but because she chose to escape this reality. The reality that you have always found to be beautiful even in your lowest moments. 

Leigh finds you in the morning, asleep on the couch with dried tears on your face and a notebook on your lap. She frowns as she tries to read the smudged paper from where she stood but when she can’t make out much of it, she decides to make coffee to help you wake up. Once you do, she tries to ask why you didn’t sleep in the bed but you are too drained to talk to her about it. She worries that you are going to start pulling away from her but when you pull her for a kiss before she leaves, she knows that you will talk to her when you’re ready.

NINE

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[leighsarchive]

the leigh shaw archive is… open !

— for anyone who’s missing our precious girl, wanting a little closure or escapism and everything in between, welcome home. 🤍

[me-uglypretty]

believe me

Pairing: Leigh Shaw x Reader

Summary: Leigh finds herself enjoying a festive night with someone than being alone, where believing doesn’t feel like false tale of hope.

Warning: (18+), fluff | 5k words

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A festive holiday bloom cheers around, thrusting shades of Christmas merriments unto faces and places, pestering some into spitting verses that wakes their spirits than leave them in their own tranquillity. Jiggle bells chimes piercingly, overplayed music made jaded by radios and people striving in their festive cheers.

And Leigh Shaw, who ironically, doesn’t hate the holiday, but rather preferred the tranquillity aspect of it.

The fragments where she was left alone in her own space, without anyone ushering her into sampling Christmas cookies or festive themed perfumes, without her mother urging her to try on another ugly sweater while her sister slips pass easily with an excuse of work, without pretending that she wasn’t still dodging the idea of Christmas after the last was spend without him, and another year marks that loneliness in her chest.

Though, she had moved on—but festive seasons left her in an indistinguishable state.

Despite that, she had accepted Drew’s invitation for his annual white elephant party. Her friend insisted her attendance as compulsory which left her scowling at the small Christmas themed paper bag that held a large scented candle.

It most definitely wasn’t taken from her mother’s vast collection of candles.

Thus, she found an escape in the kitchen. Hope bubbling in her chest that peace would remain in her own vacant space, and she could for few hours, ignore her required attendance for Drew’s party.

“Honey, can you grab those papers for me?” her mother’s voice resonates from somewhere in the house.

Leigh’s eyes darts around the kitchen and fell upon the stack of papers. “Are you leaving now?” she asked, already taking the steps ahead to take those papers to her mother.

Amy appeared by the kitchen entrance with a large beige tote bag hanging from her shoulder. “Yes, those children have long wishes for Santa Clause this year.”

While she was wallowing in her own pity, her mother had volunteer at a Christmas event made for an orphanage which became a reoccurrence deed after her parents’ divorce.

“And who’s breaking the news to them that Santa isn’t real?” her nose scrunches at that.

Amy crossed her arms with an offended look on her face at the supposed dreadful words of her daughter. “Maybe you could write a letter to Santa to help with that attitude.”

Thus, her mother snatched the stack of papers from her with a victorious smile plastered on her face at her daughter’s shocked face. Leigh doesn’t budge from where she stood, staring at her mother’s form leaving their shared house.

In the silence of her home, Leigh contemplated the idea. Those youthful Christmas evenings which were pleasant and calm. She was seven then, always rousing in anticipation at every sound of bells, aiding herself into being good as naughty children aren’t allowed to enjoy their gift. Though, the spark of mischief does flutter about.

Amy conceived the idea of writing to Jolly Saint Nick as a fun activity for their family. Leigh was beyond trilled at that young age, unaware of fictional versus reality, and only relishing in sheer innocence.

Of course, the sparks of such glee faded after her parents’ separation.

“Oh, fuck it,” she expressed bitterly. The heavy stump of her feet reverberates throughout their typical American home’s agile wooden frame.

Leigh asserted herself an unpredicted task. The white paper she found on her work desk, a pen that was laid on the floor, and an old envelope with a strange yellow tinge. And there, in the comfort of her room, she sat by her desk, tongue peak at the edge of her mouth as she wrote with an undeniable fury in mind.

The letter was written with an imaginal speed, alternating between glaring out the window at someone’s hired Santa Claus, then at the messily laid items on her desk and settling on the piece of paper again. She knew exactly what she wanted to inform the jolly man, from what she had seen in the recent years to that of a folk tale not granting the worthiest wishes.

“Yeah, we’ll see what you think after this!” she was certain at that hour, he would read the fury filled confessional letter and would understand the utmost fury in her chest.

By the time she was slipping the letter inside the enveloped, and gluing it shut, her phone vibrates with a text. It diverted her sheer focus on the significant task which wakes a frown on her face, eyebrows furrowed, and lips pursed tightly.

Leigh was pained at every night glowing from faux light and the morning brighten by the sunrise, and atmosphere so optimistic, that she approached it as the worst symptom. But the envelope holding a letter to a fictional person, those were the seconds where she wasn’t in utter sorrow.

She persevered her clear avoidance for a second longer, then reluctantly checks her phone. A message indicating as a friendly reminder for the party in an hour. The reminder itself fuel annoyance from within, as she sighed, grumbled under her breath and pushed away the mess on her desk out of frustration.

Unbeknownst to her, the letter written in her own privacy and encompassed with a fiery anger, and perfectly folded in a stained yellow envelope, had miraculously fell into the Christmas themed paper bag which was untidily tossed on the floor. It daunts her silently for whatever truth it might carry or perhaps, a letter written in spirits of silliness than sheer hatred.

Leigh monotonous movement paid no mind to the fallen items nor the thought of ensuring her white elephant gift was in perfect condition. She wanted—needed the obscurity of a celebration to end before other requests for her labour were made.

The evening was essentially meant for relaxing, but here she was, mingling as her friend said, and meeting acquaintances to inform of her very much alive state. Despite the whispers observing her sadly, as though her mild happy mask might fall and they would expect to witness the bite of a widow.

Leigh couldn’t place herself in that head space. At least. not for that night. She was uncomfortable herself, and still, she vetted the best way to converse with others and hope the night ends sooner.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” the teasing voice of her friend appeared at her side, and a large arm fell over her shoulder. “I told you. It’ll be fun!”

She held herself from spewing filthy phrases at Drew. “Hmm, very nice. I’m loving the attention for this month’s widow, by the way.”

Drew muffled a laughter, his hand failing at this attempt as he releases the amused sound. “Oh god, Leigh, even death can’t stop your humour.”

“Because death doesn’t stop people from talking, Drew,” Leigh pointed out. “Anyway, when are we starting this? I have the house to myself and I would like some peace before chaos break loose.”

And with that—a loud voice echoes through the hall room, interrupting heaps of conversation, and those snacking to their stomach’s content.

“I’m sorry! Traffic was shit and I’m exhausted. I really need a drink and we can start this.”

In the blooming sound, mixes of cheers and greetings, Leigh’s attention was drawn to their recently arrived guest. There was a certain flair, appearing so out of breath and tired, but carrying the conversation around in such a tranquillity. She wasn’t aware of who had roused such attention, but she was curious to know why.

“Hey, you’re late again,” Drew exclaimed, and hauls Leigh to where their mysterious guest was chatting away. “I told you what time and look at you, arriving fashionably late.”

An excused smile traces the curves of your lips. “Traffic, Drew. It’s horrible and I don’t get how any of you haven’t lost your mind yet,” you explained, then your gaze fell upon those narrowed eyes, a chartreuse shade that seemingly drew your attention closer.

“Leigh, meet my business partner—”

You interrupted Drew as your hand extended coyly in greeting, followed by, “Hi Leigh, I’m Y/n.”

There seemed to be a decided difference between you and Leigh, only kept obvious as she stared at your hand, then meet the gaze of her friend and nodded her head.

“Are we starting this?”

Drew doesn’t prolong the greeting. He understood from very early on that her friend’s patience wasn’t something to tease. Instead, he smoothly led his friend to the empty space on the couch. The party attendees crowd around the same area, eagerly awaiting to exchange their gifts with another.

Leigh situated herself among festive cheers. The overplayed Christmas songs in the background and shameless voices singing off-key, entirely buzzing from the holiday that she wanted to barf in her absolute angst phase.

An announced was made in commence of white elephant. The brief explanation consisted of;

“On this beautiful evening, we are gathered here together. To share our warm embrace, our love and our appreciate. We have our special gifts under the tree. My handsome husband would pass the hat filled with number chits, so everyone picks one. Just one, don’t get greedy! Once that’s done, we’ll start calling out the numbers and you would get your amazing white elephant gift.”

Murmurs around enlightened her, the transparency of those only arousing for gifts more than the celebration of being together. It irks her as they chatted about a thousand different topics, incidents that had occurred which surely wake a glance at her direction, then the hope for those outside to have an equally pleasant Christmas.

After the hat had arrived at her side of the wide maroon couch which neither strangers nor acquittances decided on sitting beside her, only Drew and his husband weren’t treating her like an outcast—she forced a smile, picking a number chit out, and crossing her arms on her lap as they continued.

On the opposite, beneath the pale amber shine from a lamp, you were seated with an amused smile and waiting—then, you met her gaze, the sight of your smiling face made her shift her gaze to the table. Her chest felt unnerving under your gaze, like were people truly that drawn to your charm and were you truly thrilled by such obscurity?

Leigh remained with her riveted facade as the activity continued, regarding the knowing feeling of your firm gaze. She resumed a placid expression on her face while a gloomy calm whirl from within. She nodded her head when her number was announced, muttering her thanks, and cradling her square shaped gift.

Just few more minutes, she had reminded herself with the flickering hope that her freedom would be granted soon enough. And she wouldn’t have to contemplate you for whatever reasons she couldn’t rationalise nor be known to.

So, she waited, burrowing her mind into the miniature decorations on the table, some grazed by her fingers in sheer interest. At some point, she had completely redrawn herself from the happening around, and absentmindedly picked at the wrapping paper layered over her gift.

“And number 22! Oh look, it’s our late comer.”

The laughter that erupts, nudged Leigh’s attention ahead and where her gaze fell upon you. An apologetic expression displayed on your face as you muttered several excuses before receiving your gift. Unlike the rest, voices were ushering you into opening your gift with the reasoning of your recent arrival in town.

The small gift that was handed to you—in what miraculous way—was the same brilliantly considered gift by Leigh. The unmissable Christmas themed paper bag that she could perceived among cluster of people, as it was the same paper bag gifted to her by her estranged father, two years back.

It wasn’t anything—and yet, she was anxious. Her eyes widening by seconds that pass, and her gaze fixed on you. The motion of your hand removing the extra crumpled coloured papers inside, how your fingers twitches and the subtle reaction on your face at what you saw. It was confusion at first, till a grin appeared heartily.

A white candle, it was short but wide in size, entirely held by your hand as the other grips the Christmas themed paper bag. It was considered favourable in your gleaming eyes, inspecting it, and sniffing the scent with a satisfied smile.

Among the scene of your contented appearance and her face pulling in a smile, the murmurs wake in disdain sounds. Questions rose of the cost, sneering judgment at the gifted object, and condemning eyes assessing for the culprit on their cheap gift.

Their criticism had only ceased by the sound of your whistle, mockingly at those convicting faces. “A candle,” you muttered, tilting the supposedly offending object in your hand. “It’s funny. I was considering buying one of this, but I was quite busy and now…” you motioned toward the candle, “I have this.”

It was faint, the jiggle melodies drifting in the air and the grumbles of some. Rude, she heard one said. Someone else muttered, boring.

“I’m reading the room and it’s telling me,” you paused, fluttering your eyes for affect before staring absently at the Christmas tree. “It’s telling me that some people love showing off which is weird…isn’t Christmas about being grateful with what you have? Or I’m missing the whole point.”

A blanket of silence made your statement more thrilling, at least, for the captivated mind of Leigh. Perhaps, she wasn’t regretting the idea of attending her friend’s Christmas party. If drama was promised among self-praised and rich brats, she would had happily skipped her way into the party.

You were stunning at that, alluring them into your trajectory and waking the worse of their nightmares. To be called out in front of many, and your triumphant smile stirred a fuming crowd.

“Okay! We all love candles! Don’t we just love them? Let’s move on!” Drew exclaimed, diverting the attention from your outburst and hollering for his husband to announce the next number.

The attention on your form declined as the next number was revealed. Leigh watches warily as you slipped out from their mind and away from the room, without attracting the slightest attention. It propelled her curiosity, blooming furiously to know who and why you had reacted so differently than most, and why she was persuaded into needing to know you.

Leigh stood up with impatience. If the night was to end, it must end by her own preference. By that, the curiosity of which she followed, wide steps and poised body. Her eyes observantly tracked your whereabouts.

It seemed impractical. “I just have to thank this kind person for appreciating a scented candle,” she spoke to herself, the feeble attempt of steering away from her true intention in replace for deception.

A thud from a closed door, directed her towards the sound. Her wanted exit, and where you lingered outside, ignoring the cold wind and clutching the Christmas themed paper bag in your hand. An additional jacket was draped over your shoulder. You were making a desired exit from the party, the same way she desired.

Leigh announced her presence, the same way she would when she leaves them stunned.

“Hey, you,” she uttered with utmost irritation. “What— hey, why are you laughing?”

Leigh furrowed her eyebrows and her mouth gaped, she looked perplexed at the laughter that left your mouth. It does nothing, but made her stomach uneasy, dotting down the unfamiliar sensation in her chest as she approached you. Her ardent gaze fixed on you and gift you clutched to your chest, and the shake of your head, as if, you had changed your mind over something.

“I’m assuming you want this back?” you inquired, without irritation laced in your tone, but something softer and kind. A pointed gaze fixed on the Christmas themed paper bag.

She appeared surprised at your revelation. “How did you know?

“I have my ways,” you teased, straightforwardly extending your hand towards her direction. “Nice to meet you. I’m a big fan of your articles,” you praised her, then squinting your eyes, “You’re not wearing that magical eyeliner, are you?”

This wasn’t the expected conversation she formed in her head. It brooded her mind to what she assumed and what made her need to meet you. While the soft humming of a familiar Christmas song wobbles her heart, the muscle of your throat bobs with that, and it feels like a stroke of youth, the innocence and untainted joy.

There’s a certain spark in your posture, seemingly free from the world’s burden, and vibrant, so alive than the image of herself, reflected on a foggy mirror. And you smiled, mindful to her attentive eyes.

Leigh’s eyes dart the width of your face and hindered on your mouth, where your lips move, talking to her of something she hasn’t registered in her mind. “What are you?” she asked, taking another step closer and clasping your hand in hers.

It's strange—the warmth of your palm, the cold that seeps at the tips of your fingers, the softness of your skin, and the lines in between where she felt a little roughness.

You squeezed her hand, a split second, your gaze fell on linked hands before meeting her ardent eyes and drawing your hand back. “Drew’s business partner for his new gay bar or something, he hasn’t decided yet. So, eyeliner?”

It's even stranger, more so, when her lips curves with smile and her cheeks felt the unfamiliar stretch of skin. “Drew is always changing. He’s very indecisive,” she shared, her body relaxing as the hand that touched yours, pressed on her arm, a palpable itch surfaced. It’s nothing, she convinced herself in blunt falsehood.

Opposite her, contemplation rouse in your mind. “Want to get out of here? I think I saw a hot chocolate booth somewhere down the street,” you spoke with delight in your voice. “We don’t have to, but I think we could use something more exciting than this,” and you vaguely gestured towards where the sound of cheers could be heard.

Leigh played an indifference facade at the offer. “Sure, whatever,” she shrugged.

When the offer was accepted, you grinned, then shake your head, like a silent joke was made and you knew it better than her. But it doesn’t irritate her as most do, as it only increased her curiosity, and she undoubtedly followed your exit from the party she dreaded.

The night breathes a whiff of brilliance and a frosty touch which left throats drought, and thirsty for something warm. Leigh felt that dryness spread from her mouth to throat, and her hands, one holding the gift while the other grasped by the wind. Silence was conveyed between two with something in between, the impulse to speak and the warning to wait.

As soon as the hot chocolate booth appeared in your line of sight, the flair of excitement which she perceived as endearing, appeared with a thumb pointed at said direction while the distinguish warmth latched to her hand, made her motionless. Leigh doesn’t comprehend the touch of your hand over hers, neither did your consciousness reminded you the grasps of strangers.

The childlike manner in which you dragged her towards the booth, establishing a wordy thought of not missing out on something warm, and the soft chuckles that send waves of a new song to her heart.

An elderly couple greeted their new customers. The clasps of hands tighten as the order was made with clear description for the most favourable cup of chocolate drink. Neither Leigh or you, had acknowledged the differences in the night air. Not after ordering and paying while still holding a stranger’s hand, not after sharing a brief conversation about the weather, and only after a comment passed jovial faces, did she realise the unknown, and similarly, so did you.

“Aren’t they a lovely couple?” one voice claimed, sharing years of wisdom in an elderly tone, and the other returned with a soft hum. “Merry Christmas, and we hope you have many more Christmas together.”

The faithful event diverted Leigh’s gaze from the steaming cups to where her hand was linked with yours, the firm touch of something so different, the same that lifts the air she breathes, and upwards where a bemused expression settled on your face. Upon noticing her eyes gazing directly at yours, almost instantly, your hand fell from hers and an obligatory distance was made between two.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, embarrassment spread your cheeks with warmth. “Got a little carried away. You know, hot chocolate,” you nodded your head towards the brown recyclable cups on the counter, before taking one of them in the same hand that once held hers.

Leigh mirrored your action, grasping the cup with her free hand and taking a short sip. She smacks her mouth, tasting the sweetness that tickles her tastebuds, and played on her known unbothered facade. To further push her narrative, she waves her hand with the gift, dismissing the mistake, and nudged her head towards a vacant bench.

However, she found herself deeply invested in your bashful appearance, a vast difference than the peak confidence that woke annoyance within some. Your round eyes, curious and warm, gazed at everything that wasn’t remotely entertaining, while maintaining a clear distance and avoiding eye contact.

“So, you’re new here?” Leigh questioned, adjusting her body to the wooden bench, as you sat contentedly and take mouthful sips of your drink.

Your eyebrows knitted, “Is it obvious?” and the cup was set aside. “Well, I’ve been around,” you briefly explained before crossing your legs on the bench and turning to face her.

Leigh followed your movement, both sitting crossed legs on the bench and facing the other. A smile drew on her face at your antics. The anguish that enveloped her, cease to exist in that hour. It’s almost charming, she thought. The way words flew from your mouth in haste and settled in a heartily laughter, the kind that made her chest feel contented. Despite the look of disbelief on her face.

“Hmm, you’re definitely going to be the talk for weeks,” she enlightened, wiggling her eyebrows teasingly.

You winced at the reminder. “God, what was I thinking?” you murmured, shaking your head.

At the same time, two phares caught between two voices; you weren’t and I wasn’t.

It made Leigh amused. “You’re so cancelled,” she drew out each word slowly, and tucked her bottom lip between her teeth.

“I don’t care,” you shrugged, gaze lingering on her mouth then meeting her eyes. “Plus, I got a candle, a delicious cup of hot chocolate, and a pretty girl by my side. What about them? They have nothing but their prestigious party and pretending. So, I’m obviously the winner here,” you declared, straightening your back as you did.

“Obviously,” Leigh repeated, purposely ignore the compliment that made her cheeks warm, and you, seemingly grasping her teasing tone, repeated the same word. “Obviously,” you said with a fond smile.

Leigh had barely, for the longest time, looked at someone in such captivation. But you were sat opposite her, beaming at the shared conversation, gazing into verdant eyes, so perfect beneath the pale street lights and flickers of faux amber light from stores close by.

“I want to show you something,” she uttered in a whim. “I think you would like it,” she added, the whispers of her heart claimed for more; I think I like you too.

The suggestion left you no room for denial as you nod your head, overcome with excitement for her outstretched hand and the warmth that resurfaced when skins touch.

“I have a feeling,” you whispered, a childlike tone in your voice as she leans closer. “It might snow in California,” the sheer optimism in your voice, almost made her melt.

She doesn’t stop the brief chuckle that fell from her mouth. “You’re silly,” she indicated, squeezing your hand in hers.

And it’s right—the warmth that tickles her chest and yours, the blow of wind that whispers of something so sweet, the glaze of a festive holiday they speak so heavenly of, everything felt right.

The ocean whooshed a song, each wave resonating peace, and tranquillity carried forward to those stood by the structure raised above body of cold water—where Leigh breathes the air of salty and sweet, where your shoulder touched hers, and the pier buzzed for the encounter of two strangers.

Leigh always preferred to remain composed, and exercise her irritation in the privacy of her mind, unless provoked beyond concealing her genuine emotion. However, the feelings that woke with her each morning, and slept with her through the night, seemed like a feeble memory in her mind.

Why did she dread the holidays? Why was she happily immersing herself in your company?

“Aren’t you curious?” the sudden question in the air, made her shift her attention to you. “What’s in that box?” you pointed at the square gift still in her grasps.

Leigh squints her eyes, “Really? Don’t you have your own gift?”

“Ouch, sorry,” you huffed, appearing offended, while the round of your eyes remained with a glint that made her smile wider.

It never happened, it shouldn’t, but she passed the gift to you. “Open it, and I’ll hold this,” she takes the Christmas themed paper bag from you, but the tug from your hand hindered her attempt.

“No, what if you take back my candle?” you asked. “I mean, that’s why you came after me, didn’t you?”

Leigh pondered the question prodding through her mind. There was a liable reason on her intention that led to her tracking you down, accepting your offer and allowing you to lead her away from the dreaded party, and here, where the moon shone an enchanting glow across the night sky and reflecting flawlessly on the ocean.

Leigh takes a step back, her hand spread out on the wooden railing. She felt the coarse texture of worn timber, and the pulsing of her heart through her ears, but she hears the song of a peaceful ocean, and she thinks, this has been the most bliss she had felt in months, years, and just too long.

“I guess, you’re interesting,” she spoke with significance. “A new face, someone who’s not expecting something from me, I don’t know— it happens. Heck, maybe it was something in the drink,” she added the latter part impulsively, fearing a more in-depth confession to leave her heart.

Silence emits between two, and she glance at you, still staring ahead into the endless ocean. There was a quirk of your lips, like a smile teasing to curl and for her heart to drop, entirely surrendering to whatever made her feel better.

“I’m trying to play it cool,” you voiced out, Leigh’s gift placed on the railing while yours daggles from your hand. “But it’s really hard,” you paused, shifting your gaze to meet her.

The penetrating gaze troubled Leigh, but she forced a smile on her face, and for what unknown reasons, she felt the ache of rejection and feared it.

You slanted into her space. “I think you’re pretty,” you whispered. “Maybe, just maybe, I asked Drew if you were coming and…that was the only reason I went to that tedious party,” you confessed shyly, still maintaining eye contact.

Leigh looked at you, as though, the most unbelievable information was thrown her way and she forced to believe it—not that her heart gnawing for those words to escape, for the lump in her throat to fade, for you to come closer and for her to feel you, like how she wishes to know you.

She doesn’t know why, but the first start of it, seemed like the best as she uttered, “Just maybe?” and your smile widens to your round cheeks. “Just maybe,” you replied.

When eyes stayed gazing into each other, heart beats raised to the wondrous occasion.

“And how I can trust you?” she questioned, moving inches closer that she could almost feel your breath fanning over her face.

Then, she felt the familiar and wanting warmth that spread her hand, the same place where your hand rest.

“Like I said, I’m a fan of your articles, and I saw you at the office few days ago, kind of changed my life,” you admitted, “But of course, I tried not being weird about it— and here we are,” you lifted the Christmas themed paper bag.

Leigh doesn’t believe in faith or the universe’s mystical ways of working things out as her mother profusely believed. But a plague of hope pushes her further into your realm.

“Hmm, is this some Christmas hallmark movie?” Leigh turns her hand over, pressing her palm firmly against yours.

“Believe me,” you whispered, a sense of promise laced with your voice, and she fell for it—she believed you. “This is so much better.”

The most unexpected trust merged with a stranger, with you.

She takes a deep breath, and exhaled her worries. Then, the swift grasps of her hand in yours, pulling your body closer. The next act, an impulse press of lips, and she feels your surprised gasp, before your mouth surrendered and you were kissing her back.

She found solace there, without isolation or running off to another temporary escape, and it was you, the stranger who held her close and pressed bodies together.

“A Christmas miracle,” you claimed, slightly winded by the shared kiss. “Or whatever they say.”

The night continued from a fond encounter, an even sweeter kiss, and the touch that left her aching for days to come. A memory made for Christmases to come, better than the last, and perhaps, more beautiful than those fading images in her mind.

“Yes,” Leigh murmured, her hand that found space on your cheek, caress the skin beneath her touch.

Your eyebrows furrowed, confusion swirling in your mind for the answer of an unknown question. “What?”

It doesn’t feel embarrassing or sad, as she answered, “I am wearing that eyeliner.”

Confusion dissolved in your feature as the corner of your lips curls, not knowing to smile or to laugh at the sudden respond.

“Well,” you paused, feeling something wet dribble on your face as you lifted your head to face the sky. “It’s snowing…in California?”

The bewildered expression on your face made her laugh wholeheartedly to the extent of feeling the almost unknown ache in her stomach from laughing so hard.

“It’s rain, silly,” she teased, and kissed you with the utmost desire to feel you, every part of you.

There, where rain fell upon two, an unexpected weather forecast and an unexpected shower of love, where mutual feelings manifest for years to come.

Leigh observes your expression at that hour, for the next, till the morning came, and she felt the same. A growing sense of comfort and love. It fuels her chest to bring you closer with a promise to allow her heart to feel everything she dreaded, and to believe in love again.

And Leigh Shaw, who ironically, despised the idea of celebrating such festive things—found herself wrapped in your arms the following year, her chest bubbling with laughter from a joke shared as her family joined. The festive occasion marked the first year of a beautiful relationship.

“Of course, Leigh had a huge crush on me,” you murmured, pressing a haste kiss on her head.

Leigh doesn’t shift from her comfortable position. “Of course,” she repeated, teasingly slapping your thigh as you purposely conveyed the partly false narrative of your first encounter. “Of course,” you said,and when eyes meet, the love that blooms were promised forevermore.

And where love was found, still unknown to them was a letter hidden inside a paper bag—unopen and forgotten.

But the universe, majestic and all, works in mysterious ways.

Bonus: Leigh Shaw’s letter to Santa Claus—

Dear Satan Santa Claus,

What the fuck is up man?

Everyone’s so excited for you. Don’t people go lay in the snow or go ice skating anymore? I know, I’m from California, but what’s the fuck is up that you have everyone under you spell? I literally saw a mom fight off another mom for the last Santa statue.

You’re fiction. But people believe you more than the news.

I think people believe in fiction more than reality. It’ll be easier to cope, right?

If I pretend that I’m not miserable, then I would be okay. Maybe I can pretend that my life isn’t cursed. My husband, still dead, can’t bring him back, but maybe, there’s this stupid love that latch on to me and I’m happy. Maybe it’ll snow and someone will hold my hand.

I just want to believe in something or someone without breaking my heart again.

New flash; I’m still a widow in my thirties, without a purpose in life.

Tell me, old man, why are people so confident that you would grant their wishes?

You didn’t give me my parents back for that shitty Christmas. A fiction tale, that’s you.

Honestly, fuck everyone for thinking that I shouldn’t feel shit during this time and that I should wake up feeling happy.

And fuck you, Santa Claus. I will never forget the worse Christmases that everyone swore will get better after you came at midnight.

I don’t want gifts. I want to be happy for once without feeling like something bad will happen.

Okay. I’m done.

Yours truly,

Leigh Shaw.

(p.s. i never wanted a ken doll, i wanted two barbies)

[ginnsbaker]

fic: if i bleed (you'll be the last to know) (12/?)

Part Summary: You know Leigh well enough to recognize that she never acts without intention. She must have agonized about this too—about that kiss, about you. And she's making it difficult for you to guess just what conclusions she had come to in the time you were apart.

Pairing: Leigh Shaw x Fem!Reader | Word count for this part: 6.500+ | Warnings: Smut | Author's note: I honestly don't know what else to write in the summary without giving too much away, so without further ado… P.S. No cliffhangers this time ;)

Masterlist | Part I Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VIII | Part IX | Part X | Part XI

-

A week after Thanksgiving, as the icy Maine wind whips across the tarmac at Rockland Airport, you find yourself holding a container of lobster cakes—your mother's way of sending a piece of home back with you. Despite her protests about you cutting your visit short, she spent last night in the kitchen, crafting your favorite dish, the smell of butter and ocean filling the house. “Eat these when you miss home,” she had said, pressing the container into your hands with a sad smile. The decision to leave early was anything but easy.

You initially planned to stay five more days in Camden, but Leigh's radio silence prompted you to book a direct flight to Los Angeles. It was eating you up inside; you had to go back. The familiar dark screen of your phone kept you on edge; you hadn't expected Leigh to strictly follow through on her promise not to contact you. She had a way of doing the unexpected. Or maybe you've been so wrapped up in your thoughts that you underestimated how deeply she wanted you that night. And perhaps you've overestimated your own anger, believing it would even slightly lessen your feelings for her.

Sitting in the window seat with the whole row to yourself, you stare at your phone as the flight attendant's voice crackles over the intercom, signaling it's time to switch to airplane mode. Impulsively, you tap out a text to her.

Belated Happy Thanksgiving, Leigh. If you’re free tomorrow evening, maybe we could talk? Perhaps over dinner?

It’s straightforward, maybe too much so, but it’s sent before you can overthink it.

The flight attendant's voice fills the cabin once more, reminding everyone to switch their devices as the plane is about to take off. You comply, toggling the setting and sealing off any immediate replies. The engines roar to life, and as the plane ascends, you try to push away the knot of apprehension tightening in your stomach.

As you wait to fall asleep, you think about Leigh—whether she’s seen your message and what she might be feeling. You wonder about the time apart, recalling the old saying that distance makes the heart grow fonder.

Or does it make it forget instead?

-

You touch down in L.A. just as the date ticks over to December 1st, the clock a little past midnight. The moment the plane reaches the gate, you grab your phone and switch off airplane mode. There's a message from your mom, checking in to see if you've landed safely, and you text her back to let her know you did. Suzie has also texted, saying Foreman called in sick and asking if you can cover at the clinic later. You shoot back a quick reply, saying you just landed, you'll catch some sleep, and might be in late in the morning.

But there’s nothing from Leigh. No text, no missed call, nothing to indicate she received your message or is interested in meeting.

You sigh and, without thinking, tap her name on the screen. The call goes through, and the phone rings as you make your way through the late-night crowd at LAX. It continues ringing, unanswered, until it finally clicks over to voicemail. You mutter a soft curse under your breath. Of course, she's not going to pick up—it's 12:30 in the morning. You consider sending a quick apology text but then reconsider, figuring you've already pushed enough boundaries by calling her this late.

Instead, you slide your phone back into your pocket and head toward baggage claim. You weave through the half-awake travelers and the sterile glow of the airport lights, finally spotting your suitcase trundling along the carousel. You heft it off and make your way through the automatic doors. You glance one more time at your phone, half hoping for a notification, but it's blank. With a sigh, you head for the exit, feeling the exhaustion settle in.

-

You check your inbox first thing in the morning, but there's still nothing from Leigh. You don't have time to overanalyze this again because you're already running late for work.

-

The whole day is swamped, with emergencies piling up alongside a packed schedule of immunizations and follow-ups. Suzie mistakenly booked an entire week's worth of scheduled vaccines for today, a Saturday. She explains that the clients requested to move their appointments to the weekend, adding, “We're closed on Sundays, so I thought today would work.”

You try to hide your frustration, not wanting to lay the blame on her. Your nerves are already frayed, and every hour that passes without a word from Leigh has you feeling more on edge.  As you tend to your patients and give instructions to the staff, you feel the pressure building, a headache beginning to throb behind your eyes. The never-ending stream of clients leaves you with no time to catch your breath. Between each appointment, you plaster on a polite smile, but inside, you're counting down the minutes until you can check out of, well, everything.

As the clock hits seven, you can't take another minute. The clinic has been a madhouse since the doors opened. You barely glance at Suzie as you callously tell her, “Close early. I'm tired.” Without waiting for her response, you trudge straight to your office and slump into your chair, eyes closed against the harsh fluorescent lights. Resting your head back, you exhale slowly, letting the tension drain from your shoulders. The fatigue wraps itself around you like a fog, and for a moment, everything falls away.

A few minutes later, you hear a gentle knock. It's Suzie, standing in the doorway with a paper in her hand. Without opening your eyes, you mutter, “What is it?” Your irritation seeps through, but you’re too drained to rein it in.

Suzie hesitates before stepping into your office, her expression unreadable. She extends the paper towards you. “It's my resignation letter,” she says quietly.

Your eyes snap open, and the paper feels heavier than it should as you take it from her hands. You’ve been nothing short of awful to her all day, snapping at every turn. 

“Is this about today?” you ask. 

She gives you a small, weary smile and points to the date on the letter. “I wrote this last week, right after you left for Maine.”

You glance down at the letter and see that it’s dated exactly a week ago. “Why didn’t you give it to me sooner?”

“I didn’t want to ruin your vacation,” she says softly. “I know how much you needed that break. And honestly, you’ve got enough on your plate right now without me adding to it.”

You can feel the burn of frustration and shame behind your eyes. “You’ve been a rock here, Suzie. I don’t want you to go. Please reconsider.”

She shakes her head gently. “I’ve thought this through. It’s time. I care about this place, and about you, but I need to move on.”

You let out a long breath. “I see. Still, I'm sorry today was so rough,” you say, looking up at her wistfully. You try working your puppy eyes, and for a moment it seems effective as her expression softens into a frown. 

But then she says, “It’s not the clinic or the work I do here. I got an offer for a research position; it's something I've always wanted to try.”

That makes you smile. If that’s the case, then you’re truly happy for her.

“I understand. I wish you hadn't felt the need to keep this to yourself, especially with everything else happening today,” you say, still clutching the paper tightly in your hand, crumpling it slightly.

Suzie shrugs. “I didn't want to add to your stress. Don’t worry, I’ll count the 30 days' notice from today, not the date on my resignation, so you have time to find someone to replace me.”

From that, you know her mind’s already made up. As you read her letter again, your eyes start to sting. You glance back up at her, your vision blurring. “Suzie, thank you,” you mumble thickly.

“Hey, it's okay,” she says gently. “I'm not leaving town. We can still grab lunch whenever. I know how glued to your desk you get, so I'll drag you out for a bite now and then.” You let out a shaky chuckle, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand.

“It's just—I’m going to miss you, and I don’t know how I'll replace you,” you say with a sniffle.

“Missing me is a given,” she says, leaning against the doorframe with a smirk. “Actually, I might know someone interested in my job.”

Your ears perk up at that. Good help is hard to find these days, especially with more demands from applicants and a tight job market. “Who?” you ask, curious.

Suzie turns around as if she's going to leave without answering, but then she glances over her shoulder, her smirk widening. “Sara.”

-

A little while later, you catch Suzie just as she's finishing up in the lobby.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll lock up. You’ve done enough today,” you say, sending her home. She gives you a grateful smile, slings her bag over her shoulder, and wishes you a good night before heading out.

Finally alone, you take a moment to decompress. Clasping your hands behind your back, you stretch, trying to release the day's tension. A dull ache climbs up your spine, reminding you how tight your muscles are. Unable to hold the position for more than a few seconds, you relax, the discomfort too much to bear. It's hard to tell whether it's from the long-haul flight yesterday, your age creeping up on you, poor posture, or all of the above. 

On a whim, you book a late-night yoga session at the Beautiful Beast, hoping to relieve the tightness in your back. It’s been a while since your last visit.

Afterward, you head to the small bathroom in your office to get ready. It's basic, not meant for much more than washing hands and changing scrubs, but it’s all you've got. Stripping off your day's clothes, you step into the shower, letting the hot water beat down on your back. The steam fills the tiny space, and the heat melts a bit of the stiffness away. After a quick rinse, you towel off and slip into your yoga gear. The stretchy fabric feels liberating after being in stiff work clothes all day. You roll up your yoga mat, tucked behind the office door, and switch off the bathroom light.

As you're about to head out of the clinic, you check your phone, hoping to see something from Leigh. There's nothing—she hasn’t even read your last message. The stonewalling feels all too familiar, and you're tired of it.

You slide into your car, letting out a weary sigh. As you start the engine, thoughts of Suzie's suggestion to hire Sara sneak back into your mind. You can't help but chortle at the idea—it’s so unexpected, almost comical, considering how you know Sara and her standing friends-with-benefits proposition. It feels far-fetched, and knowing Suzie, she was likely just teasing.

The drive to the fitness studio is as mechanical as it gets. You're hardly aware of the turns you take until you park in front of the building. You step out, mind still elsewhere, and open your car door—right into someone walking by.

“Ow!”

“Shit, I’m so sorry, I didn’t—” you start to say, cutting yourself off when you see who it is. 

Leigh, of all people, is rubbing her elbow, wincing. Her hair is tied back in a ponytail, and she’s wearing a plain white shirt under a jacket, paired with simple black tights. 

“See me? Lovely excuse,” she quips, her eyes fixed on her arm rather than you. Her expression is primed to unleash more frustration when she finally turns to meet the source of the blunder.

 “I—” Leigh stops, visibly surprised to see you. Quickly, her face smooths into something more neutral. “Y/N. You…you really should watch it.”

“Yeah, sorry about that,” you say, rubbing the back of your neck. “Are you alright?”

She rubs her elbow once more, then nods slowly. “Just startled me a bit, but I’m fine.”

Once you both regain your bearings, you unconsciously begin rocking back and forth on the balls of your feet, hesitating despite the things you’ve rehearsed in your head all week. Your text message inviting her to meet tonight lingers at the forefront of your mind. But before you can bring it up, Leigh catches you by surprise.

“So, you’re heading in for a class?” she asks casually, as if the last time you saw each other didn’t end with a kiss and a confrontation that put the aforementioned kiss on hold.

“Uh, yeah, yeah, I am,” you reply. Then you remember Leigh doesn't work here anymore, but with her mother owning the place, it's no surprise to see her around occasionally. 

Still, you ask, “How about you?”

“You mind if we walk while we talk?” Leigh suggests.

You nod, a little thrown off but managing to say, “Sure, just let me grab my stuff.” 

She waits a few seconds as you gather your belongings, and then you both start walking toward the building. Leigh sets a brisk pace, always a step ahead, and you find yourself almost hurrying to keep up with her.

“I just got back to working here again,” she says after a beat.

Surprised, you ask, “Oh, how did that happen?”

“Long story,” she replies with a slight shrug, her eyes focused ahead.

Unsatisfied with her vague answer, your eyes drift to her lips. Memories of that last kiss flood back—their soft, velvety feel and that distinct taste that’s all hers, like fresh water after a long, grueling hike. It's a taste that's unmistakably Leigh, nothing else like it. As you walk together, you struggle to stay present. This isn’t at all how you pictured your reunion with her would go. Not by a long shot.

“Leigh,” you call out, stopping abruptly. Your voice comes out higher than intended, quivering a bit. You clear your throat and try again, “D-Did you get my text yesterday?”

Leigh glances back over her shoulder, her expression unreadable. “No.”

The bluntness leaves you momentarily stunned. You wait for her to follow up, to ask about the text, but she doesn’t. As you both step into the Beautiful Beast studio, you start to ask if you can talk later, but Leigh gets there first.

“We can pick this up later, Y/N. We should really get to class,” she says, heading into the room full of waiting students without waiting for your answer.

You're left more stumped than ever. Last time, she was almost on her knees, begging for forgiveness. Now, she's acting like nothing happened. How did everything change so much in just a week? With a head full of questions and doubts, you roll out your yoga mat and try to focus on the practice ahead. You can't help but wonder if the kiss you shared with Leigh really happened or if it was just a mirage of your desires.

You struggle through some of the poses, wobbling and nearly toppling over more than once. Leigh, however, doesn't chide or correct you as she used to; she mostly leaves you alone, focusing instead on helping others who are struggling more than you. It makes you feel strangely isolated, even though you know she's just fulfilling her role as an instructor and there are plenty of beginners in tonight’s session.

As the hour winds down, Leigh's soft “Namaste” signals the end of the class. She bows gracefully to the students, and you don't waste a moment, rising immediately to make your way to her as she rolls up her mat.

“Leigh.”

“Hey,” she responds breathlessly, not looking up. Other students pass by, thanking her, and she responds with smiles and cheerful “see you next times.” You stand there, feeling awkward as you wait for a turn.

When the last person leaves, Leigh finally looks up at you. “What's up?” she asks.

You find yourself stuttering, still fixated on the text message. Feeling a bit pathetic about how much it’s affecting you, but you shake it off, remembering why you cut your visit to Camden short. It was because of this—because of her.

“Leigh, can we talk? About... you know, how we left things that night?”

Her face remains jarringly impartial as she wipes down her mat. “Talk? Here? Right now?”

You quickly shake your head. “No, I don't mean right this second,�� you clarify, watching her closely to gauge her reaction. Are you the only one feeling like you're on a tightrope? 

“You haven't had dinner yet, right?” You try to sound nonchalant too, but it's a struggle.

She looks around the emptying studio as if she needs a moment to consider. After a few beats, she nods. “Sure, why not? I’ll just change and meet you out front.”

You can't help but smile, mainly out of relief that she said yes. “Great, see you in a minute,” you say, realizing you need to change into drier clothes too.

Fifteen minutes later, Leigh steps out, looking refreshed as if she didn't just burn through a few hundred calories leading a rigorous yoga session. She's wearing a cozy gray sweater and cargo pants, a much more laid-back look compared to your jeans and cardigan.

As she draws near, she tilts her head slightly and says, “I actually brought a car. Have you thought of where we're going to get dinner?”

You scramble to think of a suitable place. In-N-Out pops into your head—quick, easy, but completely wrong for the kind of talk you need to have. You can't imagine hashing out your feelings under the harsh lights of a fast food place, over burgers and fries.

“Um,” you stammer, looking around like inspiration might hit you in the face. 

“How about we head to your apartment?” Leigh suggests out of nowhere. “It's closer, and we could grab some drive-thru on the way.”

You blink at her suggestion, surprised she'd even consider it after everything that went down last time at your place.

“There's only one parking spot,” you say blankly. “And the street has no parking after 10 p.m.”

Leigh seems unfazed, offering a quick solution. “Then we’ll just take your car. I can leave mine here.”

Your nerves flare at the thought of having her back in your apartment. Your tongue feels heavy, and you can't think of a single reason to tell her why it’s a bad idea.

“Okay,” you say slowly. “Let's do that.”

You head to your car together, fumbling with the keys as you unlock it. Leigh slips into the passenger seat, and you take a deep breath before starting the engine. You pull into a drive-thru of In-N-Out and Leigh scrolls through her phone, picking out what to order. 

You know Leigh well enough to recognize that she never acts without intention. She must have agonized about this too—about that kiss, about you. And she's making it difficult for you to guess just what conclusions she had come to in the time you were apart.

-

The takeout is spread across your dining table, a small feast that Leigh ordered for the two of you. Boxes of fries, nuggets, and burgers crowd the surface, enough to feed a group. You barely nibble on a fry while Leigh is already finishing her cheeseburger, wiping her fingers with a napkin and eyeing the remaining food.

“You weren’t hungry, huh?” she asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Guess not,” you reply, wiping away the residual salt from your fingers.

Leigh takes a sip of her drink, washing down the last bite before looking at you with purpose. “Mind if I go first?” she asks.

You narrow your eyes. So, she's eager to dive right in. “Sure, go ahead,” you say. You observe Leigh closely for the first time in what feels like ages. Concealer cakes beneath her eyes, settling into the natural wrinkles there. She’s still undeniably beautiful, but there's a tiredness to her now that’s hard to miss. Her cheeks, usually lifted by her prominent cheekbones, seem hollowed out more than usual.

“I guess I want to start by saying that I'm…” Leigh trails off, her eyes darting around as if the right words might be hidden among the packets of ketchup and silverware. “...a horrible person.”

You open your mouth to protest, but she cuts you off smoothly.

“No, listen. You were right. I ignore you out of nowhere. I take advantage of your kindness. And it’s not just you—I’ve been doing this with everyone around me for a while now. I haven't cared about what others think or feel because I was focused on being true to myself, always playing the ‘dead husband’ card. I’ve taken everyone's patience and understanding for granted, and I’m really, really sorry.”

You sit back, stunned. The whole evening, you'd braced for a different kind of conversation. You expected Leigh to say the kiss was a mistake—just a result of nerves or a lapse in judgment driven by jealousy. You had been so sure she'd shut you down, just like all the other times. 

“You're sorry?” The words slip out unbidden, tinged with surprise and skepticism.

“Yeah,” she says, looking you square in the eye. “I know it's hard to believe, but I really am sorry for how I've treated you.”

It’s going well—too well. Your mind struggles to accept it, but your heart?

“I thought you were going to say that night was a mistake. That the kiss meant nothing,” you whisper so faintly, almost as if you don't want her to hear.

“It kept me up for nights,” Leigh replies just as softly, “and that doesn’t usually happen to me over a simple kiss.”

Your heart soars.

She doesn’t regret it. She’s sorry. This is all going too well.

“It was on my mind the whole time, even when I was all the way across the country,” you whisper wantonly. 

The corners of Leigh’s lips twitch upward, and you can't tell if it's a good sign. Her saying she’s just as affected blinds you to any other cues that might suggest otherwise.

“There’s something else I need to tell you,” Leigh says darkly, leaning back into her chair with a weary slump. “Because I’m done living in half-truths and half-realities. I can’t handle any more surprises.”

You feel a flash of confusion, trying to stitch together what Leigh might say next. She knows about your cheesy alter-ego on her advice column, the details of your past with Matt. But half-truths? What does she mean by that?

Leigh meets your gaze, and there’s something about her stare that tells you she’s coming apart, yet she's clenching every muscle to keep herself intact. You want to reach across the table, to offer a touch that might steady her, but her hands are hidden, clenched in her lap beneath the table. Her shoulders hunch, making her seem smaller, as if she's trying to fold into herself.

“Leigh, just tell me,” you urge, though not impatiently.

She exhales slowly, the breath you hadn’t realized she’d been holding. “I broke up with Danny,” she finally says, and for a brief, absurd moment, relief washes over you. 

That's…it? 

Your smile starts to form, naive in its inception, but it’s quickly stifled as Leigh’s voice drops lower, and her next words cut through the nascent joy. 

“And then he said something I didn't think could drive the dagger Matt left in my heart any deeper,” she says slowly, like she’s having a hard time dragging every syllable.

Leigh takes a deep breath, her chest rising and falling deliberately. “He told me he was pretty involved when you and Matt got together. That you first knew him as Nick, and he helped Matt reach out to you.”

Your heart sinks. You had almost forgotten that night with Danny when you discovered his real identity and how he fit into everything. He'd begged you to keep quiet, and in his desperation, you agreed—not because he pleaded, but because you believed Leigh was happy with him. It wasn’t your secret to reveal, not then.

You've known this all along and never said a word. Your throat tightens as panic sets in, your heart racing with the implications of having kept this from Leigh. Guilt pricks at you, cold and sharp.

“I…” Your voice falters, and you swallow hard, thinking, This is it, this is how I lose her. 

“I didn’t think it was my place to say anything,” you say. “I thought you were happy with him. I didn’t want to be the one to—”

“Y/N,” Leigh interjects softly. Her tone stops you cold—it's not angry, just… defeated. Which, somehow, feels worse. She looks down, twisting a napkin between her fingers. “I’m telling you this because I’m finding out that secrets can be just as hard to handle as loss.”

You nod absentmindedly, still processing, and move to clear the table in a daze. Wrapping up the leftover food, you tuck it into the fridge. The mundane task doesn't ease the tightness in your chest, but it gives your hands something to do.

“You’re not upset I didn’t tell you?” you ask, like you can’t believe you’ll come out of this conversation unscathed.

Leigh takes her time to answer. With your focus on tidying up, you miss the way her hands ball into fists. When she finally speaks, her voice has a steely edge for the first time this evening.

“At first, I was livid, of course. But Danny bore the brunt of it. He claimed he wanted me, but he was never on my side. If he were, he would’ve never helped Matt cheat on me.”

You finish tucking the last container into the fridge and lean back against the counter, your eyes on Leigh. She's staring out the window. How is it that she’s telling you these things, yet it still feels like she’s not revealing anything at all?

“I should’ve told you sooner,” you say softly. “I’m sorry.”

Leigh gets up and walks toward you. She stops so close that your breath catches. You remember the last time she was this near, how the world blurred, and how hard it was to think clearly. You can see the way her jaw tightens as she takes a breath.

“It wasn’t your secret to tell,” she says.

“But—” you start to say, though the thought fizzles out as she steps even closer.

“You're okay in that regard,” she murmurs, her voice low. 

In that regard? 

You want to ask what she means, but Leigh shuffles nearer still, her eyes searching your face. She's so close now that you can see the faint reflection of the kitchen light in her eyes, specs of yellow in darkened green. It’s nothing short of dazzling.

“Do you forgive me for last time?” she asks quietly. 

A lump forms in your throat, and all you can think about is how desperately you don't want to mess this up. You had forgiven her long before stepping onto a plane back to Maine. It happened as soon as you let her walk away that night, but you just couldn't accept how easy it was. 

You nod, unable to trust your ability to speak. 

Leigh's eyes soften as she watches you. Her fingertips brush against your jaw, her touch feather-light. 

“Is it okay if I kiss you, then?” she asks, both careful and seductive.

Your resounding yes comes in the form of you closing the gap, your lips meeting hers like an arrow striking its target. Leigh’s arms wrap around your shoulders instinctively, her fingers brushing the back of your neck, and you pull her in even tighter, deepening the kiss. Her breath mingles with yours as she sighs softly against your mouth, and it’s only then that when you feel all of her that Los Angeles starts to feel like a second home.

There are still questions, an unending list that always surfaces around Leigh, but they evaporate one by one when her tongue flicks out, seeking entrance. You surrender, lips parting, allowing her to taste you. The kiss grows with a messy urgency in seconds. Her hands roam down your back, gripping tightly as she presses in, as if trying to melt into you. You draw her nearer, your chests flush together as the kiss becomes wet and breathless.

Your apartment is silent except for your soft pants and the slick sounds of your lips meeting.  Doubts about your ability to please a woman creep in after such a long hiatus. But before these thoughts can take hold, Leigh takes charge. She grabs your hips and gently guides you backward toward the bedroom, cutting off any chance for you to slow things down.

She breaks the kiss just long enough to slip your cardigan off your shoulders and whisper, her breath warm against your lips, “Should we take this somewhere more comfortable?”

It seems almost unfair for her to pose that question while simultaneously moving to your neck, drawing a soft groan from you. Her teeth gently graze a sensitive spot just below your clavicle, applying pressure that promises to leave a mark, then soothing it with her tongue.

Leigh smirks when she feels you struggle for breath, much less for words. Your knees buckle slightly, but she holds you up with a firm grip, guiding you back until you bump against the edge of the bed. 

You know you're on the verge of something that might change everything, but right now, you're entirely Leigh's. There's no space to consider the implications, to remember that she was Matt's grieving widow just months ago. Right now, she's just the girl who holds your attention completely, the one who couldn't get rid of you even if she tried.

Leigh tumbles with you onto the bed, her thighs straddling your hips. With practiced ease, she removes her shirt and bra all at once, leaving her bare above you. The sight strips you of any last coherent thought. She isn’t the image of perfection peddled in glossy and well-curated social feeds; her body is beautifully real. Her tits look heavy and asymmetrical, round as grapefruit; her nipples pinkish-brown, pebbled and inviting. There’s a soft fold in her belly, and an overwhelming desire washes over you to kiss it. You think you might die just from looking at her.

You look up at Leigh and tell her, reverently, “You’re so devastatingly beautiful.” 

Leigh's cheeks flush as she tries to hide her smile behind her hair. “You don't have to tell me that,” she whispers. “You already got me into your bed.”

You chuckle, nerves still humming under the surface. “You were just as beautiful when devouring a cheeseburger.” Both of you laugh, the sound light and easy, allowing some of the thick sexual energy to dissipate slightly. 

You find yourself relaxing just enough to admit, “I'm not sure how to touch you right, but I want to make you feel good.”

“Just do whatever feels good for you,” she suggests, her expression softening further.

You scrunch your face a little at her, letting out a small chuckle. “That’s the thing—I haven't been getting much action myself.”

Leigh’s smile spreads wider into something mischievous and you swallow dryly at the sight. She shifts off your lap and settles at your side, propping herself up on one arm to look down at you. “Let me help you with that,” she murmurs, her voice low.

You're no longer smiling, feeling your face flush as you ask, “What do you have in mind?”

Instead of answering, Leigh’s fingers trace down to the button of your pants, deftly unfastening it. She gently scratches the skin beneath with her fingernail before sliding the zipper down. You watch as she bites her lip at the sight of the wet patch on your underwear before glancing back up at you. Her pupils are wide, the deep green of her irises barely visible in the surrounding darkness.

“Take them off,” she instructs softly.

You swallow heavily and do as she says, trying not to cover yourself despite feeling incredibly vulnerable. You haven't been naked in front of anyone in so long, and you're embarrassed by how exposed and wet you are right now.

Leigh watches you closely, and you can see the desire burning in her gaze. With her free hand, she reaches for you, her touch gentle, coaxing your thighs open as she trails her fingers up your inner thigh. You draw a sharp breath and close your eyes, expecting her fingers to graze your wetness next.

But Leigh surprises you—and herself—by guiding your right hand just below your navel, her fingers warm and sure on your wrist. Her times with Danny were about dominating and taking, but with you, she wants to give, to watch, to soak up every moan, every breathy reaction, every shiver. She wants to see you take pleasure for yourself, deriving her own pleasure from it.

“Start there,” she murmurs, her breath hot against your ear. “Tease yourself.”

Your hand hovers there, and she gives a slight nod of encouragement. As her touch slips away, you begin to explore the softness of your own skin, tracing light circles below your belly button. You utter a soft, “Fuck,” when your fingertips graze your slick, discovering just how turned on you really are. The filthy noises it creates make you whimper.

Leigh watches you hungrily. “You should be doing this more often,” she murmurs, eyes tracing the movement of your fingers now glistening with your own arousal. “You're so fucking hot. It's such a shame.”

The sound of her voice makes you arch your back further, hips bucking as you start a wide circular motion against your clit. Exerting every ounce of control not to come right away, you focus on the sensation of Leigh's eyes on you and the stimulation from your own fingers. You want to hold out, to let her watch you teeter on the edge. Your teeth dig into your lower lip, trying to curb the wave of pleasure building inside you.

Leigh's voice is a soothing command, whispering, “That's it, be patient. Don't rush it.”

“Fuck, Leigh, I’m—” Your words die in your throat as she lifts your shirt slowly, exposing your nipple to the cool air for a brief moment before her mouth engulfs it. The sensation of her sucking, then laving your nipple with her tongue, circling it, mimicking the motion you're doing on your clit, sends a jolt through you. Little flicks of her tongue to the tip of your nipple drive you crazy, and you gasp, your body responding eagerly to her touch.

Your rhythm stutters as she discards her pants and panties in one swift motion, leaving her gloriously bare. The sight of her naked body ignites a strong wave of desire to touch her instead, but Leigh pins you with a warning glare, silently telling you not to stop.

She straddles one of your legs, and you gasp when you feel her warm, wet pussy against your knee as she starts rocking against it. You position your leg to give her better leverage, and she starts sliding against you, her tits bouncing with each motion. Leigh's sucking on your nipple becomes sloppier, more frantic, until she can no longer concentrate and releases it with a wet pop.

“Oh, fuck, Y/N—” 

Leigh’s face contorts in pleasure as her drenched folds meet your thigh over and over, sweat dripping down between her breasts from the strain of holding herself up above you. The sight of her fucking herself against your leg is nothing short of mesmerizing. You increase the movements of your fingers, rubbing harshly at your clit as you watch Leigh, her breath coming in short gasps. Her eyes flutter closed, and a soft moan escapes her lips. The sound drives you wild, and you curve your spine, lifting your hips to meet your own hand.

Sex with anyone else has never felt this good before, and she hasn’t even properly touched you yet. It’s intoxicating, the way she takes her pleasure and gives it to you all at once. You’re lost in the haze of it all: the smell of Leigh’s arousal, her sweat-soaked skin, the sight of her tits bouncing and her face flushed with desire.

With your free hand, you grab the back of Leigh's head, guiding her down towards you. “C-Come here,” you manage to say, your voice breaking with need. 

Leigh obeys, her mouth meeting yours in a frenzied kiss. You swallow each other's moans, the taste of her lips sending a fresh wave of desire coursing through you. It's this simple, sweet connection of lips that utterly dissolves all your defenses.

A keening moan escapes you as Leigh slides a finger inside you, pushing deep to the third knuckle, causing your head to tip back and break the kiss as the tightness in your belly becomes too much. “Leigh, can I—” Your voice is a mere whisper, your body trembling with the effort to hold back.

Leigh's eyes meet yours, and she nods vigorously, her breath coming in short gasps. “Yes, come. Come with me.”

It's too much—the sight, the sounds, the feel of her—it’s all too much. With a final, shuddering whine, you let go, your orgasm crashing over you. Your body convulses, muscles clenching and releasing as you ride out the intense pleasure. Moments later, Leigh follows, her body shaking as she comes, her moans mingling with yours. Leigh’s face is a picture of bliss, her eyes half-closed, a satisfied smile playing on her lips. You try to memorize it before she collapses on top of you, a sweaty mess of tangled limbs and satisfied sighs.

Blindly, you stare up at the ceiling, trying to catch your breath, feeling Leigh's hot puffs of air tickle your neck as she catches hers. Slowly, you circle your arms around her waist, keeping her on top of you, acutely aware of every point where your skin meets hers, the warmth spreading between you. 

You bury your nose in her hair and breathe in deeply. This act feels more intimate than anything you had done moments ago. The simple closeness, the quiet afterglow, the way you can actually feel her heart beating steadily against your chest.

Minutes pass in comfortable silence, your thumb tracing lazy patterns on her back. Her breathing gradually evens out, each exhale growing softer and deeper. Realizing she's fallen asleep, a contented smile spreads across your face. You press a gentle kiss to her temple, letting your lips linger there for a moment. Carefully, you reach for the covers and draw them over both of you. You hold her close until your own eyelids grow heavy, and you drift off to sleep as well.

[fandomnerd9602]

Y/N walks in and sees Leigh’s Christmas sweater…

Y/N: oh goodness that sweater is ugly!

Leigh: you picked it out for me!

Y/N: I know. I did that on purpose

Leigh: why?

Y/N: because I wanted you in something so hideous, I’d rip you out of it the first chance I could

Leigh: you have to catch me first (laughs)

Y/N chases Leigh around the house…

[gingiesworld]

Confusion

Leigh Shaw x Step Sibling GN! Reader

Warnings: Angst. Fluff.

Taglist : @natashamaximoff-69 @canvascoloredin @wizardofstories @louxbloom @wandanats-goodgirl @the-ox-fan20 @ladyqueenxoxo @aemilia19 @wandaromamoff69 @mfd-101 @dorabledewdroop @marvelogic @dopeyouth @karsonromanoff @bimad (if you want to be added to my taglist, please DM me or comment)

18+ MINORS DNI

Since the moment Leigh had ended her fling with Danny, her dead husband’s brother, she had been in a kind of limbo. She has been moody, depressed, afraid that she can’t escape her old life, unable to move forward.

“You’ll be fine Leigh.” Jules comforted her one night as she cried, after having a dream about Matt.

“He won’t leave me alone.” She sobbed as Jule’s grip tightened around her.

“Maybe you should move on.” She tried as Leigh shook her head no.

“I tried that.” She told her as Jules chuckled.

“I mean move on away from the Greer family.” She told her. “Maybe Y/N.” She teased as Leigh shook her head.

“They’re my step sibling.” She told her as she shoved Jules away with a laugh.

“Well, that’s never really stopped their obvious crush on you.” Jules told her as Leigh raised a brow. “Ever since we have been kids, they’ve always had heart eyes for you.”

“No.” She shook her head as Jules nodded. “That can’t be.” Her words trailed off.

After that moment, she spent days racking her brain as she remembered every moment from their childhood, from the moment her father married Y/N’s mom before she passed. Every time they had done something for her without asking, helping her with homework that she didn’t understand. Even defending her in high school when she would get bullied by the cheerleaders and the jocks.

It had been weeks since Jules’s revelation, every time she had seen Y/N around her father’s home, fixing things that needed to be fixed, she couldn’t help but let her mind wander, but she never realised that she would have to see them so soon.

“Hi?” She questioned as she answered the door to them, unsure of why they’re there with their tools.

“Your mom told me she had a problem with the washing machine.” Y/N told her as she nodded, letting them inside and watching as they walked through to the utility room. Once she closed the door, she took a deep breath before following them, watching as they started to take apart the drum.

“Do you want some coffee or water?” She asked them.

“Coffee please.” They answered with a smile, a smile that had made Leigh’s heart skip a beat for the first time. As she waited for the coffee to brew, her thoughts were plagued by them, unholy thoughts as she watched them start with the washing machine. She has already seen how strong they are, seeing them work on the new construction sight.

“Are you ok?” They asked her as they entered the kitchen.

“Yeah.” She breathed out as she kept her eyes on their movements, watching as they reached under the sink. “What are you doing?” She asked them.

“Just some bicarb, it helps with the belt.” They told her. “It was full of grime so it wasn’t spinning as well as it should have been so I've cleaned most of it but putting it on a drum wash with a cup of this inside will help more.”

“How do you know this stuff?” She asked them as they shrugged.

“I guess I’ve always liked the idea of mending things that are broken.” They told her before leaving to head into the utility room, soon followed by Leigh and two cups of coffee in her hand.

“What if you come across something you can’t fix?” She asked them as they shrugged, sipping the coffee from their cup.

“I guess if I can’t repair it, it doesn't matter how much research I do but I won’t be able to fix it, I just have to move on.” They told her as she nodded, thinking of what to say next.

“Why have you barely spoken to me since college?” She asked them.

“I don’t know.” They spoke unsurely. “I never really thought about it.”

“It’s been since the moment I met Matt.” She stated as they finished their coffee before packing away their tools, wanting to get out of the house and away from the conversation. “Is it because of your feelings for me?”

“How do you?” Y/N asked her, hurt in their eyes as she raised a brow. “I have to go.” They tried to walk past her but she stopped them.

“Just tell me the truth. I deserve that at least!” She yelled as they squeezed her eyes closed.

“Yes!” They yelled, their eyes glazed with tears. “I have been in love with you since I can remember, and yes, I became distant when you and Matt started seeing each other because it wasn’t me. It would never be me so I left you alone.” Leigh listened as they poured their heart out. “So I tried to move on from you, from this hold you have on me but I can’t and I hate it!” She watched as they stepped around her, leaving the house as Leigh remained frozen in her place.

As the hours passed, Leigh remained locked in her thoughts, wanting to apologise to Y/N but they were ignoring her calls, so she decided to ask her dad for their address. Soon racing through the city towards their house, she smiled as she remembered how they always said they wanted a nice little house, never really seeing the appeal of an apartment.

“Leigh?” They spoke unsurely as she walked around to find them chopping up firewood. “What do you want?”

“I want to apologise.” She told them. “I was out of line.”

“I respected you.” They told her. “That’s why I never acted on my feelings for you, that’s why I kept my distance because I respect you, I respect your boundaries.”

“I know that.” She tried as they shook their head.

“You don’t.” They whispered as she approached them. “I have loved you for as long as I can remember, when we were kids, you used to say that you would marry me one day.” She sighed as she remembered the moments when her father and their mom dated. “You said you would always love me more than life itself but I grew up realising that everything we had felt, it was all one sided.” They sighed as they put the axe down. “You never loved me the way I love you.”

“You don’t know that!” She yelled as she now stood before them. “We’re siblings.” She told them. “We still are.”

“I never saw you as one.” They told her. “I saw you as the one who owned my heart but I guess the joke’s on me.” She watched as they entered their house, following them as they washed their hands.

“What can I do?” She asked them as they shook their head with a dry chuckle.

“You can leave me alone.” They told her. “Just let me try to move on from you.”

“But.” She tried as Y/N gave her a sad look.

“I just need to move on from you, from what will never be because I can’t deal with this.” They told her. “So please leave.”

“No.” She whispered as they clenched their fists.

“I need you to leave.” They told her in a broken whisper. “Just leave me be and move on with your life.” They opened the door for her, waiting for her to move before she stopped before them.

“You do know that you are one of the most important people in my life.” She told them.

“Just not important enough.” They told her before closing the door behind her. Sighing as they leaned against it, squeezing their eyes as they heard her car door close, but not hearing the footsteps as she climbed the steps and knocked on the door again. Y/N opened the door reluctantly, seeing a confused Leigh, watching as she cupped their cheek, gazing into their eyes.

“I just need to see something.” She whispered as Y/N remained frozen, eyes closing as they felt her breath fan over their face, sighing as they felt her lips on theirs, kissing tenderly before their hands moved to wrap around her waist, soon finding themselves lost within each other as Leigh pushed them inside the house, kicking the door closed as she pushed them down on the sofa, straddling their lap as she felt everything and more with each passing moment, every action igniting her being as she found herself beneath them, panting and moaning as they moved down her body.

The two of them lay cuddling on the sofa, just a blanket wrapped around them as Y/N’s arms held her close. She smiled as she felt alive for the first time in years, even just the slightest touch of their fingers brushing her arm softly ignited her.

“What are you thinking?” She asked as she looked up into their eyes.

“I don’t know if this is real to you.” They told her honestly. “I just need to know because I don’t think I can stay if this doesn’t mean anything to you.” She shuffled to straddle their lap, cupping their face as she looked into their eyes.

“I guess you can say that I needed to open my eyes to what was in front of me.” She told them. “This feeling I have right now is the most alive I have felt in my life, I guess it has always been you. It’s always going to be you Y/N.” She kissed them softly before the two smiled. “We should shower.” She whispered as her hands massaged their sweaty shoulders, Y/N nodded before picking her up, carrying her up the stairs as she giggled. The two happy and content.

[writing-house-of-m]

Walk out

Leigh Shaw x Reader

Warnings: Not edited

Word count: 651

Summary: Everything works out for Leigh eventually

A/N: Based on this request. I don't know why people always want Leigh to be sad...

"Don't you dare walk out that door!" Leigh shouts at your back while you have one hand on the door handle.

You sigh defeatedly and turn back to face her, "It's already over Leigh, you won."

"So after everything you're just going to walk away?" Leigh asks.

You sigh then turn your attention back to the table you walked away from. It's a little embarrassing that this is happening in front of Leigh's mother and sister.

"What do you want me to do?"

Jules looks back and forth as she shares some of her popcorn with Amy who is doing the same. Maybe you should charge them for this entertainment.

"It's not like I'm going to flip the board. The rest of my money is there, you can take it all, I'm going to go watch TV," you say.

Before you can turn to leave again you hear Leigh laugh, "Come on baby, don't be a sore loser and sit with us for the rest of the game," she whines. Her clinginess recently has been a welcome change. "Just declare your bankruptcy first," she finishes with a giggle, Jules and Amy joining in.

You playfully roll your eyes, making your way back to your seat. Gathering all your money and property you distribute it according to the rules before monotonously saying, "I declare bankruptcy."

Leigh smiles at you, biting her lip. She leans over and kisses your cheek whispering a smug thank you into your skin before picking up the dice.

"The three of you are always conspiring against me in this damned game," you say looking around the table at the three women.

"We have no idea what you are talking about," Amy remarks in fake seriousness, taking a sip of her wine.

"Yeah, you're sounding a little crazy there Y/n," Jules adds.

You scoff at their playfulness and know you have a long night ahead of you before this game ends.

When the game does finally end you notice Leigh's discomfort as she tries to get up from her seat.

"Here, let me help," you say, moving to Leigh's side. You hold her hand to hoist her up while your other hand stays on her waist to keep her balanced. "I told you, you should have gotten up to stretch throughout the game."

Leigh's arms wrap around your neck, "Yeah, but then I wouldn't have been able to do this now," she says, before kissing your cheek.

"You're such a flirt Leigh Shaw," you chuckle before placing your hands on her swollen belly. "I wonder if this one is going to get that trait from you."

"Well, if not from me then they'll get it from you. Besides, it will be better than how competitive you are during board games."

You tighten your arms around Leigh's waist, "It doesn't matter if you're seven months pregnant, love, you still have to pay rent," you squint your eyes at her. "And you're saying this like you're not competitive? Who was it that wouldn't let it go when I said the wrong weapon out loud even though I had it right on my checklist, last week?" You question, with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah… This baby has no chance," Leigh jokes, making you both laugh.

"Alright love birds, you can go home now. The cleaning is done," Jules jests.

You look over to see the table has been cleared of the board game and the snacks that were littered all over it.

Amy says her goodbyes telling you to drive safe once you make it to the front door. Jules does the same before watching you walk to your car.

That night, after you have fallen asleep with your arms securely wrapped around Leigh and her bump and your heavy breathing is the only sound in the silent room. She sighs in content because things finally worked out for her.

[chiefduckgarden]

Last dinner.

Wanda maximoff x Reader

Angst.

A/N: I wrote this a little rushed, I'm sorry if I made some mistakes. Btw, english it's not my first language so please, if you see any mistake let me know, I promise I'll get better :)

_________________________________________

It was 6 pm, and you were alone in your house cooking dinner for you and wife. She was at work and you knew she'll be coming home soon. Earlier in the afternoon you decided you wanted to take some snacks for her to eat at lunch time, so you made a little unanounced visit to her office. She told you she would see you at the house.

The sound of the oven letting you know the food was ready dragged your attention from the soup, leaving the wooden spoon on the counter you went to take out the chicken you cook. Oh, the salad wasn´t ready yet!

Holding your sharpest knife you grabbed the fresh lettuce and began to chop it.

- Wanda it´s not here now honey, she´s at the supervisor's office, maybe you want to wait, she´s been in there for quite a while now, sometimes their meetings can last and hour or so.

- That´s fine, i´ll wait.

- Okay, but don´t say i didn´t warned you...

You smiled politely at the secretary and took a seat at the white bench. You could wait for Wanda.

Wanda´s favorite food was all over the large wooden table. The soup, the salad, the drinks, the paprika, the meat. Everything you knew she loved was there, waiting for her to arrive.

Looking at the clock on the wall you realized you still had some minutes to fix up your make up, so you took your little mirror from your purse and began to apply some lip gloss.

- She´s been there a little too long, isn´t she? - you asked with a little laugh.

-Yes, told you it could be even an hour.

-Yeah... i need to use the bathroom, do you think i could use the one in her office?

- Oh sure, you're the wife after all, i don´t see the problem.

-Thank you... And if she comes back don´t tell her i´m here, it´s a silly little surprise

- Oh sure, don´t worry - the woman told you, simulating the closing of a zipper in her mouth.

The candels and the roses were spread all over the room and the romantic slow music was the perfect tuning for the night.

You walked into your shared room and looked at yourself in the big mirror. Your dress was perfect, and special for the occasion. Your hair, your make up. Everything was fine. And your shiny little ring was the best detail to wear that night.

Before stepping out of the room you looked at the prepared suitcase in the corner. You grabbed it and took it with you to put it at the living room.

Walking down the stairs again you took a seat on the couch waiting for your wife. She would be there at any time.

Washing your hands you were thinking about leaving the snacks you prepared for Wanda and go back home. Maybe she was really busy and you were just interrumpting her day. But the sound of the main door in her office told you your wife was back.

- Those files you sent me were amazing Wanda - you heard the voice of her supervisor, Vision, talking.

- Thank you Vis, i really looked forward for something nice.

You smiled thinking about the hard work of wife. Maybe you´ll do something nice for her to celebrate her amazing work.

- I can´t wait to be there with you, just the two of us - Vision said.

You frowned, confused.

- Me too, i told my wife i´ll be out for two weeks, so we´ll have enough time, the vacation house it´s beautiful, and i can´t wait to be there.

- It could be like this forever Wanda, just us, be with me, be mine -his voice was soothing and full of love, like he wasn´t telling atrocities to a married woman.

- I am yours, i love you and only you, someday will be just the of us, i promise, i just need time.

And then you felt like vomiting.

The sudden sound of keys and the door announced Wanda´s arrival. You smiled and stood up to welcome her.

- Y/N where are you? - she called out for you.

- I´m in the living room honey - you said.

She stepped in quickly, looking tired and rushed.

- Y/N, i can explain everything, what you saw at the office...

- Dinner is ready darling, I have everything prepared - you cut her off and walked into the dining room.

She followed you confused.

- What? I'm telling you I need to explain...

- I made paprikash, and even cooked your favorite meat and cut fresh veggies for our salad.

- What? I... - Wanda rubbed her face with her hand in exasperation trying to understand - What's all of this? And why... - she looked at you from head to toe - Why are you wearing your wedding dress?

- It's a special night, a special dinner Wanda - you said like it was obvious.

- I don't know what is happening but we need to talk... - She said getting closer to you, trying to hold your hands.

But you avoided the contact.

- Oh we're gonna talk, but we're gonna have dinner in the meantime... What do you say darling?

She shook her head shocked.

- What are you doing? I need...

- JUST TAKE A SEAT! - you finally yelled, little tears falling for the corner of your eyes.

She jumped a bit for the sudden reaction and looked at you confused.

- Sorry - you said - I had a shaken day, but I made dinner for us, please let's just eat... At least give me that.

She gulped and nodded.

- Thank you.

You stepped out of the office bathroom just to see your wife and her boss kissing in her desk.

- Wanda...

She froze in her place and turned around.

- Y/N, what are you doing her? - she asked.

- I just came to bring you some snacks for your lunch but... - you looked at Vision trying to fix his tie - I think I better go home.

- Y/N I can explain, Vision and I....

Then someone knocked on the door and the secretary walked in.

- Sorry for the interruption but Mr. Hart wants the report of the week now, he asked for Mr. Vision and Mrs. Maximoff at the conference room now, the investors are waiting for you...

- I'll be there in a minute, thank you - Vision said walking to the door as the secretary left the office - Are you okay Wanda?

- Yes, tell Mr. Hart I'll be there in a minute too I just need...

- Go now Wanda, they need you, I'm leaving - you said without looking at her in the eyes.

- We need to talk Y/N, just wait for me in the house, I'll explain everything.

You nodded numb and left the office as quickly as you could.

You didn't want someone to notice you were crying.

- I'm sorry it's a little cold, but it's still warm at least.

- It's fine, thank you - she said eating awkwardly.

- You know, I tried to recreate the exact dish they served that night, but I don't think i nailed it - you said laughing a little.

She frowned her eyes and looked at you a bit confused.

- You don't know what I'm talking about? - you asked with trembling voice.

- About the food? - she tried.

Tears started to fall silently from your eyes again, this time ruining your make up.

- It's the same food we ate at our wedding... Ten years ago.

Both of your hearts broke a little at the confession.

- Y/N I'm sorry, it's just I'm really distracted, I need to talk and you... - she said, starting to sob.

- And the music... - you cut her off again - It's the song from our first dance... And the one you showed me in our first date.

Wanda looked at you astonished as she listened to the music playing in the background for the first time in the night.

'How sweet it is to be loved by you' was on repeat.

She couldn't help but cry, and so did you. But both for different reasons.

You were crying drowned on so much feelings. The day drained you emotionally and took your life away in a matter of hours.

She was crying because despite the constant reminders of your shared love she couldn't help but feel nothing. She didn't love you anymore.

- Y/N...

- Yes? - you asked smiling through your cry and eating. To be honest, you knew you looked crazy. She probably thought you had lost your mind. But you didn't care.

- Can we talk please? About everything.

You slightly nodded and drank from your wine, looking at anywhere else but her.

- Vision and I - she started and you regretted letting her talk the second she mentioned his name - We are together.

- You're having an affair - you corrected her.

She looked at you hurt.

- What? It's the truth. You are my wife, you are cheating on me with him. Don't call it any other way.

- Y/N...

You reached your breaking point, you couldn't help but cry and be mad, and disappointment.

- For how long? - you said, with a trembling voice.

She gulped and looked at the floor, playing nervously with her hands.

- One year.

Oh that hurt. More than anyone could think.

You let out a breath that you were holding. Your cry was intense, intense and silent.

But you were still eating.

- A year?... That's a lot of time... How?.... Why?

She sniffed.

- I don't know, we spent a lot of time together and it just happened... I felt attracted to him... I just couldn't help it.

- But you were supposed the be attracted to me, you are my wife...

She finally looked at you again, with pity in her eyes.

- I'm not... I don't.... - she tried to find the right words to tell it with touch, but there was no easy way to say it - I don't think i love you anymore... I fell out of love a long time ago... I just don't know why.

That was it. Those words you were so afraid to heard. She broke you.

- Y/N, it's not your fault, I just can't love you anymore, I'm sorry for the damage, but I can't help but feel nothing... But it's all on me, you did nothing wrong, i swear...

But you didn't respond. You just couldn't. You felt numb, like you were dreaming, like your soul had left your body and there was only the shell of you left.

- And Vision, he was there for me all the time, and when we started to spend more time together I fell for him...

You looked at her. Your stare was heavy, it looked tired, disappointed... And blank at the same time.

- Please say something - she asked.

You sighed.

- What's going to happen to us?

She stared at you sadly.

- I think it's better for us to get a divorce Y/N, you deserve someone better, someone who can love you completely...

- Did you never love me completely? - you suddenly asked her.

- I did, for a really long time you were my everything... But now...

- Now it's him.

She gulped, closing her eyes nodding.

- Yeah, now it's him.

You were still in some sort of trance, but you knew it was enough for that night. You needed to rest.

You got up from the chair and started walking toward the stairs. But before leaving the room you stopped to look at her.

- Give time to process this... Situation. I'll let you know whenever I'm ready to fill the divorce papers...

She stand up to look at you.

- I need time Wanda, I know that for you this marriage ended a year ago, but for me... I just lost my wife this evening.

She nodded, whispering sorry again and again.

- The suite cases you prepared for your 'business trip' are in the living room... You can leave whenever you want, it's still your house too anyways.

- Y/N... - she stopped your tracks when you were about to leave - I'm sorry for everything, for the lies, and the affair, and pain... You don't deserve any of this... I'm really sorry.

You smiled bitterly.

- Your apologies mean nothing to me Wanda... You're the most coward and horrible person I ever met - you finally said angrily - You ruined my life... Ten years of marriage ruined by you...

- I know, I know, I'm sorry...

- I don't forgive you, and I will never forgive you... But still, I hope you're happy with him, you two really deserve each other...

You left and locked yourself in your bedroom. And only then, you allowed yourself to cry, to scream, to throw and break things that reminded you of Wanda.

After several minutes of pain and chaos you ended up laying in your bed, curled up in fetal position, embracing yourself crying.

Even after everything you said to Wanda you still loved her. Just that morning you were still thinking you had the perfect marriage and the perfect wife. And you thought at some point she would knocked on your door, begging for your forgiveness, saying how much she loved you and telling that she wanted to be with you.

But that never happened.

After thirty minutes you heard a car parking in the front door. You looked through window and saw Wanda and Vision putting the suit cases in the car and then leaving together.

You went back to bed only to cry again.

It was 10 pm and you were alone in your house.

[billie-reportingbadnews2you]

IDK WHICH ONE YALL HELPPP