#OKAY. FIRST OF FUCKING ALL. BO BURNHAM'S INSIDE MENTIONED

[feathered-cat]

GREAT HEAVENS

look who's inside again

interpret this however you feel. originally planned/initially started on the release day of tiny uke, it just reminded me a lot of icimi and bo burnham's inside, so i did this.

also please ignore the fact that I spelt surrounded wrong I can't spell for shit

separate images/process/linework below!

hey I actually spelt it right in the previous versions tf. dang

[fersauce47]

I'm stuck inside my house again =/

If you'd have told me a month ago that I'd still be inside my home ranting on Tumblr, I would have told you to leave me alone. I may be a mess, sorry for being gone. But I'm back now and I made you some posts! =D What a beautiful day to be inside ranting on my PC.

First off, the world is changing. There's a lot going on, from the (not so) recent election to all the TikTok drama I won't mention by name, to the global warming, and to the lack of new music from my favorite artists like Bo Burnham.

The world is so fucked up. It needs direction from someone like me... a white man who has little problems. There's only one thing I can do, (While getting attention) and it's tell jokes. So if you start to panic, don't. Come to my page to see my jokes!

I got this idea while I was on the phone with my mom earlier. We were on the phone, she was talking about nonsense the season 6 finale of The Blacklist, while simultaneously covering the camera with her thumb and holding the phone 6 inches from her face.

When I was a sophomore, I took AP World. My teacher would always dumb down and white wash history, telling us that everything was great and the world works by every creature giving what they can and taking what they need. But no, the real world is a lot more messy. It's full of genocide/exploitation of minorities, and protects the interests of the top 1%. Sorry for being dark.

Why do you see the same things on every millennial white woman's Instagram? Golden retrievers, cheesy poems in the sand, bible verses, latte foam art, etc. Can we switch it up a bit?

What's the deal with these internships? Sorting papers, running around, sitting in a meeting room acting like you aren't there, and getting coffee for everyone? I should just go back to living with my parents.

It'd suck if Bezos joined Muskrat's group of friends. We need at least ONE billionaire who isn't THAT fucked up.

Have you ever done what they call sexting? Me and my gf did last night bc I'm out of town. They say it's just like regular sex, but no, it wasn't. Emoticons cant give me a bj. =[

I'm just trying to be funny. I've been stuck in my room for a while now, and I'm starting to wonder if being funny while trapped in the same room is even possible...

Some of my jokes might be problematic. But at least they aren't bad as my old YouTube channel, that'd be a yikes.

Guys... I'm officially unc status. I turn 20 in a couple weeks, and I CANNOT deal with allat. I used to wake up with a smile and ride my bike through people's yards, but now I'm gonna be the old man yelling at all the kids for doing exactly that.

Are these jokes okay? Are you tired of them? Too many? Too little? Nevermind, I'd prefer not to know.

How are you guys feeling today? I'm still in my house, I feel like shit.

You know, I don't think I'm alright. I'm approaching an ATL. (that's an "all time low" not Atlanta)

While you're here, welcome to Tumblr! If nothing interests you here, you'd be the first! Just nod or shake your head and we'll do the rest! Be happy, be horny, be crying at rage bait, there's a million different ways to engage. Hope you enjoy!

MAN FUCK BEZOS

Although Tumblr is fun, a lot of things on here give me that funny feeling. Like all the people who preach about Tumblr being a "dead site" and how they wish there were more people here, and then turning around and saying they like the community. Pick a side!

Did you really make it this far? Damn, didn't know I'd have so many eyes on me.

I'm pretty much done here, I'm out of jokes. But do I really have to finish? Does returning usually feel like this? So this is how it ends... If I can chase this high for any longer, I'll promise to never go outside again.

Here's a fun idea: How about I go scrolling and watch YOU rant next time? I wanna hear you tell a joke to an empty text box.

Am I going crazy? Would I even know? Am I gonna end up right back where I started? Fuck this, I'm over it. I'm not leaving my house, I'll rot here. I'm panicking... is there anyone's page I can go to for a joke?

This post will end any day now... I swear...

[whatnotmemes]

-------------------BO BURNHAM’S INSIDE OUTTAKES SENTENCE STARTERS change as needed. language, adult content, mentions of mental illness.

“I’m going a little crazy.” “I don’t have a kid. I crochet instead.” “I’ll bother getting better when I bother getting dressed.�� ”I’m living in the future.” “Am I kinda hot?” “I’m just hoping I can write or film something soon that’s usable, or I’m just gonna stop and play PlayStation.” “Is this fucking doing anything?” “Is this looking cool or just fucking stupid?” “I’m a stupid little bitch!” “I just wanna feel good.” “I’m not even close to kidding.” “I wanna know when Dippin’ Dots is going to condemn child sex trafficking.” “Maybe I’ll feel better when I got to bed.” “I wrote a joke. Wanna hear it?” “If your least favorite word is ‘moist’ and you tell people that, I hate you.” “My least favorite word, by the way, is ‘injustice.’” “I wrote a song for you.” “You’re an adult. You can figure it out.” “You think I am the worst.” “Why would you assume that you’re entitled to a dumpling?” “I don’t wanna fight so let’s just drop this- it’s not a big deal.” “You owe me a dumpling or a dumpling equivalent.” “Um no, fuck that.” “Your whole worldview collapses the moment there’s a spider.” “I get it, this is the real you. It’s a pleasure. Nice to meet you.” “Shit like this brings the movement down.” “Everyone’s a feminist until there is a spider around.” “Our culture has been taken over by a radical group of SJW feminist freaks.” “Now we’re fucking talking.” “Offer yourself by being yourself. And if that doesn’t work, be somebody else.” “Who you are on a fundamental, sort of unchangeable level, may just be uninteresting.” “How is the best case scenario Joe Biden?” “Soon after I posted my first couple videos, they went viral.” “There’s a lot of material that I’m just really embarrassed by and makes me cringe for a lot of reasons.” “I often wish that I could just, you know, start over.” “Fuck you, dude. Fuck you, alright?” “I ain’t afraid of no spider.” “It’s very upsetting that the future is in front of now, do you know what I mean? Like that we have to keep living from now onward.” “This isn’t a joke, so don’t joke about it.” “I don’t wanna talk about it.” “I’m doing fine. Twenty-nine, in my prime.” “I am a weird looking dude.” “You’re supposed to see the top of your head when you come out of your mother’s pussy, but you saw my face. I came out face first.” “Other days, like today, I just feel like I’m completely spinning my wheels and wasting my time.” “I’ve been eating these things for basically every meal for the past six months.” “I’m using a paper plate. I know they’re bad for the environment but I’d rather put a gun in my mouth than do another dish.” “We could and would and should have done better.” “Our doing isn’t done and our done-ing isn’t did, okay? So know that.” “We are living in a golden age of content.” “Time is still, you know, passing.” “It’s only a problem when you go outside.” “I’m done being sad.” “Am I going crazy? Maybe, maybe not.” “Pray for us.” “The more I wait for it, the more shitty I feel and look.” “I realized the only way this thing is going to stop is if I stop doing it, so I’m going to stop.” “She likes her life as a mother and wife, but is that all she is?” “Her future is waiting right there for the taking.” “The chicken must first cross the road.” “I’m an adult man in a baseball hat.” “I don’t know what’s happening.” “What the fuck is going on?”

[broadwayandnetflix]

OMG- BO FIC REQUEST

a fluffy fic where he takes you out to a fancy dinner. picks you up at your house & meets your parents, driving to the place, all that pizazz- and more if you decide to write! Im a big fucking sucker for the romantics as you can see LMFAO.

Meet The Parents - Bo Burnham x Reader

Warnings: Language

Theme: Fluff! Slight bit of Angst.

Word Count: 2.6k

A/N: picture this as like his what tour cause it fits up with the college timeline hoes. also, I hope you like that I added an airport, cause rom-com shit amirite? I’ll stop. wooooooo this is so long. I hope y’all like essays cause fuck.

It had been too long since you had last seen your boyfriend, Bo. The two of you had met in college at NYU briefly before he dropped out to pursue his comedy career.

Of course, you have been supportive. Why wouldn’t you be? You just really missed him, especially when he went on long tours, you in school, and him touring the world.

The two of you kept in touch. Bo often taking the time to call you before or after a show to hear your voice and call himself down. You knew what they did to his anxiety, and not being able to hold each other was difficult for the both of you.

He’d do the same for you, without a shadow of a doubt. Especially when school was stressing you out, and exams and essays were becoming a pain in the ass to handle. Even if it was just little funny texts or messages, he helped you.

It’s what you did for each other. You were a team, even if it was states away from each other. Except, luckily for you, his tour was ending soon. Or it should be, judging by the tiny calendar of dates that he gave you.

It was nearing Thanksgiving Break, and it just didn’t seem applicable that you’d be able to meet up in time. Given the short week window and Bo riding down from nearly a year of touring.

So you didn’t say much, as you packed your bags for the week and left for your home state.

The airplane ride wasn’t that bad. You wished that you had Bo beside you, cracking jokes to calm the inevitable way that your heart would jolt when you went up in the air. Unlike Bo, you absolutely hated flying.

Earbuds in, you strolled into the airport a tad bit jet-lagged and went to grab a bite from a small coffee shop. Slipping the cashier a twenty, you walked the airport in search of your luggage.

Through a sea of people, you trudged, already feeling fatigued and just wanting a nap. You didn’t even realize that you were gonna run smack dab into someone. That is until their hand shot up and held you steady.

You laughed pathetically and cringed quickly, going to apologize, hoping that the person who caught you would just keep moving on. Except, they still stood in front of you, silent as ever.

“Hey man look I’m so sorry, I’m just so tired I didn’t even see where I was going.” you mumbled before realizing just who you were speaking to.

Bo.

You froze, staring at the man in pure confusion. How was he here when he was supposed to still be on tour? You rubbed your eyes, wondering if he’d still be there when you reopened them.

News flash, Bo was still there. Fuck.

“Holy shit,” you murmured, realizing your hands were still full with your bag, phone, and lunch.

God, you were gonna cry; this wasn’t happening. He looked so fucking good, the glasses, the hair.

He watched you quietly, a soft smile resting upon his lips. While you clumsily pull on his arm to get out of the ongoing traffic of people around you, preferably a spot with a place to put your stuff.

Your tall boyfriend lumbering after you unbeknownst to you, trying to compose himself. It had practically been months since he had seen you last, and you had never looked more beautiful.

Once you set them down gently, you practically ran into the man’s arms. His bags gently fall to the floor as his arms are securely wrapped around you. Nearly lifting you off the ground.

The two of you rocked gently in the embrace, completely lost in each other. Bo resting his head on top of yours, pressing soft kisses upon your head. Tears softly pour down your cheeks and onto his shirt. Giving him enough time to wipe them away and plant a soft kiss against your lips.

“Bo, what are you doing here? I thought you were still on tour.” you sniffled, still wrapped up in his arms.

“Managed to make things work, I wanted to see you. Or I was gonna try and surprise you at the gate, but you kinda…ran into me.” Bo smirked, looking down at you.

“Well you definitely surprised me, man I really missed you.” you said quietly.

“Honey, you don’t understand how long I’ve waited for this moment. I swear my agents are probably sick and tired of me talking about you.” he exclaimed, causing you to smile.

This long-distance was really starting to get to the two of you; of course, his tour was gonna be over soon. Except, especially two different states away from each other, it made your heart hurt.

Moments like these, you wanted to just pause the time and exist in them forever. It seemed like between the two of you, you were running out of time. Just how much time exactly?

It was almost as if he could sense the hesitation as he swept up his bags and yours in the process.

“Just realized, we’ve got places to be.” he chirped, and you eyed him curiously.

“Like where?” you said, grabbing your coffee and bag from the coffee shop.

“Patience is a virtue my dear.” he tuts and slips his hand between yours. “Now, where’s your luggage terminal?”

-

It was roughly a forty-minute drive from the airport to your place. Bo had rented a car for the next couple of days, so it was smooth sailing from that point on.

Bo behind the wheel, and you are sitting in the passenger trying to figure out what music to play.

It didn’t help that you were in the car with a comedian, as whatever song you picked, Bo would pretend to critique it. Only sending you into a fit of hysterics.

“Oh okay, well you pick the music then!” you cried, pretending to stare daggers at him.

“I’ve got something for you, it’s this brand new artist I found while on tour.” he grinned, looking over at you briefly before focusing back on the road.

“His name is….Bo Burnham I think? I could be wrong? He was good-“ he said nonchalantly before earning a quick swipe to his arm from you.

“God, you look cute when you’re angry. You’re missing out on that Bo Burnham guy, he’s got potential.” he said.

“I hate you.” you giggle before finding a more comfortable position in the car.

“Oh shit you know what I just realized?” Bo yelped, causing you to slightly jolt in your seat.

“What?”

“Isn’t this the first time I’m meeting your parents?” he asked, causing you to slightly stiffen in your seat.

Technically, yes. It wasn’t like your parents didn’t know, it’s more so that there was never really a good time for them to meet. You wondered what they’d think, dating someone who dropped out of college to pursue comedy.

Not that your parents were judgmental. They wanted you to be happy, as any parents would. You just were worried if they wouldn’t respect and love Bo as much as you did. It had been close to two years at this point; what else did you have to lose?

“You are right, oh dear god. I wonder how that’s gonna go, hopefully well, right?” you ask, more so to yourself than Bo.

“Oh please, I’m great with people’s parents. Plus, they raised you, I’m sure they are great people. Babe, you’ve got nothing to worry about.” he reassured before continuing on the route.

-

It wasn’t long before he pulled into your family driveway, pulling the car into park, quickly placing a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“You ready?” he says quietly, looking at you sweetly.

You eyed the front door before looking back and meeting his eyes, nodding, as he leaned in to give you a quick kiss.

God, you missed those.

“Here goes nothing.” you smirk before slipping out of the passenger side and gather your bags.

Bo now follows suit as you knock on the door, his taller frame towering over you. One hand pressed on the small of your back, holding you steady.

The front door opens with a swing, with your mother greeting you at the door. A firm grin upon her lips as she rushes out to hug you, your father appearing behind her.

“Oh I’m so glad you were able to come home! We missed you so much!” she exclaims, squeezing you tighter.

Before giving you a slight nudge and knowing look towards Bo, who had remained oblivious, while he shook hands with your father.

All of you gather inside your house, Bo taking control of the conversation when acceptable.

Sitting down at the kitchen table, your parents are engulfed in his stories and laughing at his jokes. All the while getting to know the man that you loved so much.

Bo was pretty much a natural when it came to impressing others, and you knew it wasn’t gonna be an issue with your parents.

The two of you answering almost any questions, Bo excitingly telling the story of how the two of you met.

-

“Oh I almost forgot, I need you to do me a favor.” Bo murmured when the two of you had a moment to be alone.

You looked up at him in confusion before he mentioned something about dressing up nice. A knowing look upon his lips before giving you a slight wink and walking off towards the guest room.

There you stood, gaping like a fish in wonderment at what he possibly could be planning. Slowly walking into your childhood bedroom, looking for anything that would meet his description of nice.

You settled for something that you wore to a formal gathering that still managed to fit you. Giving yourself a quick look in the mirror, you left your bedroom to find Bo standing there.

You had to hold back a gasp; the man looked rather handsome in a dress shirt and pants. His hair was nicely done, and his hand gestured out for you to take.

“Bo what is all this for?” you exclaim, as he only smirks and leads you towards the front door.

“Shut up, I’ve been wanting to take you out for months.” he says as he opens it and leads you towards his car.

The man practically doing the whole nine yards, all the while you looking at him in pure wonderment. Of course, the two of you had been on dates prior, but never like this.

You had to practically stop yourself from grinning as he suavely got into the driver’s side of the car., Giving a quick glance over at you unbeknownst to you, trying not to melt at how gorgeous you looked.

“Where are we going?” you ask as he starts the car slowly pulling out of the driveway.

“You ask a lot of questions my dear.” he says, keeping his eyes focused on the road.

“Oh shit is this my execution?” you smirk as he dramatically nods.

“Babe, how the hell did you find out? Who told you? Was it my manager? I knew she’d rat me out!” he exclaims.

“You know I had to be certain, you did make me dress up all nice and all.” you play along, grinning ear to ear.

“Oh well, I can’t give away the entire surprise so zip it with the questions sweetie.” he quips as he continues the drive.

-

It’s not long before he pulls into a fancy Italian restaurant, way out of your usual pay range. You could feel your stomach do somersaults, giving the man an incredulous look.

Bo simply grins as he gets out of the car, rushing over to open yours for you. Eyes wide, still staring at him like he was fucking insane. He shakes his head and carefully pulls you out of the car.

“Now no complaints. Or whatever you plan to do. I’m paying, I’ve been wanting to treat you like this for over a year now. I’m doing it, and I’m gonna enjoy doing it.” Bo huffs, all dignified.

You simply nod in disbelief before he slips his hand within yours. While he enters the restaurant, he mentions his reservations to the hostess, and they seat you at a table.

Once the butterflies subsided in your stomach, you took the attention of the man in front of you. Never had anyone done something like this for you. You were trying to not look like a genuine fool with the smile you wanted to express.

You knew he was the one for you, but the way that he had looked at you. The pure adoration in his eyes and how he had planned everything, you were practically melting.

“I love you.” you whisper, wondering if he could hear it.

He did.

Bo looked up from his menu, a blush now practically kissing his cheeks. He dimples, rising at the declaration before reaching across the table since he was large enough to kiss you gently.

He was quick enough as the waitress came over to take your order. That goofy lovesick grin still plastered across his face as he straightened up in his seat.

The two of you ordering whatever looked best on the menu, clinking glasses when they arrived and looking dreamily into each other’s eyes.

“Man, I missed you. Like I know I say it a lot, but I mean I did. Going on tour is….well it’s lonely. I know you’re still in school, but sweetie. When I’m done, you’ll be sick of me. I promise.” Bo said insistently.

“No I won’t, I’m sure it’s gonna be the other way around. I don’t know if I say it enough, but I really am proud of you. I am so proud to call you my boyfriend, to call you mine. I don’t mind waiting.” you say quietly.

“How did I get so lucky?” he paused, eyeing the plates of food that were coming your way.

“Thank NYU, they did all the work.” you joke, thanking the waitress before digging into the meals.

The food was excellent; it was incredibly worth the price. Even if it was steep, the dinner was lovely. Bo is cracking jokes and telling you his favorite fan encounters that have occurred since his tour began.

It was hard to believe that the man who was often so quiet and shy could be so loud and brave enough to yell at hecklers. Except you could believe it, you had obviously been to one of his shows.

It made your heart begin to flutter at the fact that he wasn’t afraid to be himself around you; it made you feel secure.

The way his stage presence dominated the scene, it was practically impossible to keep your eyes off of him. No matter the situation.

Even now, his eyes glimmer while he tells you whatever story he had dug up. This was his passion, and you reveled in it all.

The night went well as the two of you caught up, knowing it would be quite some time before he’d meet up with you again. As he too had Thanksgiving to celebrate with his family in Massachusetts.

You shared a nice dessert, and he left a rather hefty tip simply because he could. Bo never made it necessary to note that he had money, but you knew he was excited to spend it.

All the while, you spent the night in a dizzying smile. Not giving a shit whether anyone knew it or not, even in the parking lot. The two of you waltzing messily towards the car, giggling and sputtering like a bunch of fools.

He was your fool, and you were his, who knew how long you’d have with him for now. You were destined to make the most of it.

Even as the ride home dwindled and you knew he’d have to catch a flight soon. You weren’t surprised or shocked even; days with him tended to be like this.

As the two of you reached your front door, Bo carefully leaned down to a comfortable position and kissed you softly. Not desperately, just tenderly. As if by the time he’d kiss you again, you’d simply wouldn’t be there.

His lips grazing yours, hands pressed carefully against your cheeks. You reciprocating all the while leaning into him in a warm embrace.

When you finally pulled away to catch your breath, he gave you a look that you knew all too well.

“I’m not saying goodbye.” you whisper into his arms.

“I’ll be back soon don’t worry.” he murmurs into your embrace.

With one last kiss on the forehead, you watch as he walks back to his car. Judging by the way his schedule worked, you knew he’d be back sooner than he would in the past.

Yet, with the soft ‘I love you’ said between the two of you couldn’t help but shed a tear and just hope that the next time would last longer.

[anotherrevue]

The Top 25 Movies of 2021: An Inaugural List

Hi.

For years, I’ve been thinking about starting blog or newsletter or something because I watch a lot of movies and writing usually helps me figure out what I think. But do you remember the night before the first day of school, when you got butterflies about the new year and you were excited to meet everyone and maybe this year was gonna be your year, so then you ended up barely sleeping at all, going to school really tired and it turned out school sucks even more than before? Yeah basically, I overthought myself out of doing this. Until now.

I know it’s kinda weird to start this whole blog/website thing with a Best of 2021 but here I am. I watched 535 movies in 2021, out of which 105 were new releases. It’s not quite as much as Steven Soderbergh but I’m working on that. In 2021, “unprecedented times” became “precedented” but not in the way we all were hoping. It’s just, 2020 was such a colossal shitshow that 2021 seemed like it would be more manageable in comparison. On the bright side, hey, at least there’s a vaccine now. But 2021 is also the year I graduated college and the year that I mostly spent unemployed. It felt long and meandering and I kinda lost the will to do anything beyond lying in bed, putting on a movie and checking out as much as I possibly could. I even got sick of movies for a while there. That was a real shock, actually, because I’m usually driven by an totally satiable need to watch every movie ever made.

But it’s 2022 now and I feel re-energized, in part thanks to a spree of gorgeous movies that I caught up with before the year ended – and to some I watched over the last two weeks and so won’t be on this list on a technicality (I lie, there’s an honourable mentions section at the end where I will indeed talk about them). So without further ado, my Top 25 Films of 2021:

Okay a little further ado here: It was a real fun year cinematically because we got a ton of talented filmmakers giving us powerful movies to dig into (Jane Campion is back baby, let’s fucking gooo!). I didn’t catch up with all of them, either because I didn’t have time (Encanto, A Cop Movie), couldn’t make it out to the theatre (Spider-Man, West Side Story) or wasn’t ready (Bo Burnham’s Inside – absolutely could not hang with it emotionally).

Okay now the list:

25. Skull: The Mask

24. Riders of Justice

23. No Sudden Move

22. Titane

21. Candyman (2021)

20. The Rescue (2021)

19. C’mon C’mon

18. Summer of Soul

17. One Night in Miami

16. Quo Vadis, Aida?

15. Psych 3: This Is Gus[1]

14. Zola

13. The Power of the Dog

12. Cliff Walkers

11. Petite Maman

10. The Mitchells vs. The Machines

9. Benedetta

8. Last Night in Soho

7. The Card Counter

6. Sardar Udham

5. CODA

This year has seen a surprising (and promising) amount of deaf representation on screen, with both TV (Only Murders in the Building and Hawkeye) and movies (A Quiet Place Part II and Eternals) featuring prominent deaf characters played by deaf actors. And leading the pack is CODA, a high school coming-of-age movie about Ruby (played by Emilia Jones), a hearing Child Of Deaf Parents. Even though the main character is hearing, what sets CODA apart is how naturally funny the deaf characters are, especially Troy Kotsur as Ruby’s dad. It’s a little predictable, on account the genre, but I never felt like it was relying on tired tropes. No, the movie is too genuine for that. I understand that this type of movie is supposed to be mushy but goddamn if it doesn’t work, because I cried two separate times in the last half hour.

  4. Judas and the Black Messiah

I love this genre. Thrillers about the rise and fall of a real-life icon? That alley could have my name on it. But Judas packs a heavier emotional punch than most movies in this genre, because most movies don’t have Daniel Kaluuya and Lakeith Stanfield. Kaluuya got a ton of press and won the Best Supporting Actor Oscar (weird that that’s already happened) but I think Stanfield’s performance is severely underrated. He looks like he’s almost doing nothing, spending most of this movie behind this wooden façade. But that’s the point. He’s so scared to trust anyone that it makes sense for him to be this cut-off, blank slate kind of a guy. Lakeith Stanfield quietly helps this movie sneak into the revolutionary Hall of Fame.

  3. Tick, Tick… BOOM!

This is one of the movies I watched in that last week of 2021, and it’s the one that really brought me back in. I love movies about creative people but I’m a bit tired of “broke artist tryna make it in the big city” narratives. Because of that and because I was vaguely aware of Jonathan Larson’s story beforehand, I was putting off watching this movie for a month. So when I finally caught up with it, I was blown away by how much I loved Tick, Tick… BOOM! It’s unexpectedly full of energy and excitement and Andrew Garfield is such a whirlwind on screen that it doesn’t feel at all like those other struggling artist movies. Garfield had such an impressive year and that talent is on display here as he holds this movie together emotionally in a way that few leading men are capable of. OH and an absolute breakout performance by Robin de Jesús, I can’t wait to see him in more things. I also cried twice during this movie (and I swear I’m not an easy crier, but this is not the last movie on this list that set off some waterworks). It’s hard to walk away from this movie not feeling inspired. Actually, this movie is what got me to start writing again, so maybe it should be bumped up to number one.

  2. Undine

It’s about a sort-of mermaid known as an undine, but it’s also about Berlin’s architecture and history? I love Chritian Petzold because he blends a bunch of different and oftentimes contradictory ideas into one movie and presents it as if it’s the most natural thing in the world (see: 2018’s Transit). This movie is about all those things I said before but it’s mainly about love, and the chemistry between Paula Beer and Franz Rogowski is so pure and almost tangible (they have maybe the most soulful hug that I’ve ever seen). I was so fully engrossed by this movie that it was only when it was over that I noticed the dried-up salt-tracks on my cheek. Do I remember when I cried? Not even a little.

NOTE: It helps to know the undine legend going in, because the movie doesn’t explain it at all, so maybe do a quick google before watching.

  1. Night of the Kings

This is the best movie. I mean obviously, it’s my number 1, but the bizarre thing is, I honestly couldn’t tell you why. I can tell you that it’s about a young man who arrives at an isolated prison in the middle of the jungle in Cote d’Ivoire and, to stay alive, he has to tell a story that keeps the whole prison enraptured. How well this movie worked on me is beyond explanation. I forgot I was watching a movie; I was just listening to him tell the story, and every time the crowd yelled in the movie, a shock surged through me like I was right there in their midst.  Much like Les Misérables (one of my favourites from 2019), the story has the feel of a Shakespearean tragedy, with the stakes for different characters perfectly intertwined to ensure a spectacular domino effect ending. This has everything I want from a movie but in a way that simply cannot be replicated.

***

Some honourable mentions:

Pig, The Last Duel, Limbo, The French Dispatch, A Quiet Place Part II, The Green Knight, Eternals[2], The Night House, Old, Moxie, Small Engine Repair, Blood Red Sky, The Harder They Fall, Night Raiders, French Exit.

Special shoutout to my favourite random documentary of the year: Fantastic Fungi. It’s about mushrooms, it’s relaxing, it’s on Netflix. Check it out.

Some 2021 movies I watched in 2022, and so were not considered for this list: No Time to Die, The Matrix Resurrections and The Worst Person in the World. No Time to Die was a lovely finish for Daniel Craig’s Bond, even though I didn’t care about the villain and the action sequences got less exciting as the film went on (a truly strange progression). The Matrix 4 was one of the smartest sequels I’ve seen in a while, but I adore all the Matrix films so your mileage may vary. Definitely not for everyone, nor does it pander to the audience in the slightest. What everyone can hopefully agree on, however, is that Jonathan Groff is shockingly beautiful - and shockingly menacing - in this movie. Finally, The Worst Person in the World is incredibly relatable especially for vaguely lost people in their mid- to late-20s (me). But don’t take my word for it, it’s out there winning awards and making the top spot on a ton of critics’ Best Of 2021 lists.

  ***

I’ve barely scratched the surface of the movies that I enjoyed watching in 2021 (again, great year for movies, not so much for everything else) so if you don’t like any of mine, don’t worry, there’s plenty more out there.

Meanwhile, I’ve been in a writer-y mood to start the year, so rest assured Another Revue will return... very soon.

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[1] Okay Psych is my favourite tv show, so fuck yes this was great

[2] This is the most interesting MCU movie in a long time, even though it might not be the most entertaining. It felt really risky and weird in a way that MCU hasn’t ever done and it was so beautiful to look at.

[papishawn]

part two: i am an artist, please don't revere me

pairing: shawn x ofc

word count: 1,358

warnings: language, implied and mentions of violence

title and inspiration from bo burnham’s ‘art is dead’

It had been months since Shawn had returned home and the couple had been going through the motions of daily life. They took Ollie to daycare, Charlotte went to work and they played happy families for anybody that watched on. Their friends and family believed everything was fine, normal. Yet, inside their modest and well-kept home, things weren't so rosy. 

The initial yelling and fighting had subsided into a resigned silence. The arguments had become repetitive and pointless, neither of them budging on their views. The longer they were stuck in the cycle of pointless arguing, the more aggressive and heated the fights got. All too often, broken glass fragments littered their floor and fist-sized holes decorated their white walls. They realised they were getting nowhere with each other and just gave up on the fights. Neither of them wanted to frighten Ollie or shift his world around anymore that it had already had been, but both of them knew they couldn't step on eggshells forever. There was a long overdue conclusion to this situation that was on its way, and they both knew it. 

Things had begun to simmer down between the couple after a few months of tension filling their home. They both decided that Shawn should go away for a weekend to do a show, just to see if they would be able to adjust back into that lifestyle. In a surprising turn of events, it went quite well and Ollie was happy to have his father home sooner rather than later. Shawn took the positive reaction as a sign that they'd put the conflict behind them and they could really start fresh. However, the relaxed and contented atmosphere could only last so long. 

After another long week of passive aggressive comments and late nights, Ollie was sent off to his grandparents' house for the weekend. That's when things sort of collapsed. 

It was Saturday night. Dinner had been eaten, too much alcohol had been drunk and a flushed Shawn sat on the couch with his head in his hands, wishing to be anywhere else. 

"I just don't know how many more times I can say it. I'm like a broken fucking record, Shawn. How many times can I tell you that this family needs consistency before you get it?" Charlotte was stood in front of him, arms folded across her chest. 

Shawn tugged at his hair and took a deep breath. "No," he began slowly, carefully, "what I don't understand is that I went and did a show last weekend, came home; everything was fine... now you're standing here losing your mind. That's what I really can't understand." 

Charlotte chuckled dangerously and repeated him, "losing my mind." She shook her head, "when I lose it, Shawn, you'll know." 

Shawn looked up at her, a daring glint in his eyes, "you fucking lost it years ago." 

"Yeah, it happened when I met you. You drive me up the fucking wall, I can't stand it." She yelled, "I can't stand you!" 

Charlotte was the one to raise her voice first. A risen voice in their fights was like a starter's pistol. When one of them started to yell, it was on for young and old. 

"Then why the fuck are you with me?!" Shawn yelled back and looked her in the eye for the first time in a long time. 

 Charlotte looked down at him from where she was stood in front of him and a small, sad smile tugged at her lips. The atmosphere immediately changed and her voice was barely above a whisper, "because you're Ollie's father."

The confession cut through the tension like a knife and Shawn felt his heart drop to his stomach. His ears rang and his head started to swim. The warm, comforting feel of their living room was a stark contrast to the cold words from Charlotte's mouth that left Shawn's chest aching. 

"So what?" Shawn asked, his voice quiet once more, "should we just end it?" 

Charlotte sniffled and shook her head. She walked over and sat down beside him on the couch. "I've said it before, Shawn. You need to decide what's more important to you. Us, or them... and you need to decide quick." 

Silence. 

"I can't give it up, alright?" Shawn finally spat out, "is that what you wanted to hear? I can't walk away from it and I won't walk away from it."

"I think you know that that's the opposite of what I wanted to hear." Charlotte spoke quietly and picked at her fingernails to avoid looking at him. 

"I'm sorry. I can't live without it." He mumbled out and stared straight down at his feet. 

Charlotte smirked and could feel tears forming in the corners of her eyes. "You're an asshole." 

Shawn nodded, "I know." 

"You only think of yourself, Shawn. You're a selfish asshole." She spat out hurtful words in a harsh tone to hide the tears that threatened to spill over.

Shawn didn't answer. He just stayed staring at the floor and nodded every time Charlotte threw another insult at him. She grew quiet after a few minutes and Shawn took a deep breath. 

"Call it narcissism or call it passion, but Char, I need to do this. It's what I was made to do." He spoke, calm and measured. 

Charlotte quickly dabbed at her eye with her index finger, intent on not letting him see what this was doing to her. After a few seconds, she just nodded at him. "Okay. I understand." She whispered, defeated. 

Without another word, Charlotte took herself upstairs and gathered his luggage, that still hadn't been unpacked from his recent trip. She hauled the heavy bags down the stairs and with strained breath, she threw them at his feet. 

Shawn looked confused as his gaze shifted from the bags back to his wife. "What's this about?"

"There's your shit. Get out." She told him as she crossed her arms across her torso. 

Shawn still stared at her with a confused look on his face. "What?" He chuckled, as if she was joking. 

"There's your shit," she motioned to the bags still sat at his feet, "get out." Her resolve didn't crumble as she waited for him to pick up his bags and leave.

"You want me to leave?" He asked her, as he realised that she was being serious. 

"Yeah, I really do." 

"I don't... what?" He didn't understand what was going on. He thought they'd just resolved everything.   

It was Charlotte's turn to laugh, "the fact that you think I'll let myself or my son be a second option speaks volumes about you, Shawn." 

"Charlotte-"

"Being a parent is all or nothing, Shawn. You're in or you're out. Why is it fair for Ollie to have a part time father?" 

Shawn nodded, seemingly to himself and sighed before he picked up one packed bag and slung the other over his shoulder. He didn't say a word as he walked towards the front door. Charlotte followed him to it, but still kept her distance to see him turn around, "I really wish it didn't have to end like this." He spoke lowly and looked to the floor. 

Met with silence, Shawn opened the front door and took a long, deep breath. As he stepped outside of their home, he was stopped. 

"Shawn," Charlotte spoke from inside.

He turned back to where he came from and Charlotte stood in the doorway to their home. 

"Here," she held out her hand and dropped two silver, diamond rings into his larger one. "I'll have a lawyer contact you by next week." 

Shawn looked down at his hand to see her engagement and wedding rings laid in his palm. Tears pricked the backs of his eyes and he nodded when he looked back up at her. 

Charlotte held his eye contact and refused to let any of her own tears fall. She tried to say goodbye, but no sound escaped her mouth. A sad expression graced her features and her hand came up in a simple, motionless farewell to him and then she closed the heavy, wooden door.