#Oh god time for all the tags (two of these are from two different medias)

[makotheseawing]

(Reblogs appreciated!)

good lord I need to post my art on here more

anyways!!! Simple lil icons for a few of my ocs on toyhouse, will prob make more later after school👍👍

[scattered-winter]

it's so funny to me when i see people talk about the mcu like "oughhh they should have used [x] character's theme in the soundtrack in the 5 second scene they appeared in" like you really think the mcu soundtracks are cohesive enough across movies to be able to incorporate motifs and themes in a meaningful way. you really think that. lol. lmao, even.

[writingstoraes]

lover 🪻

pairing: charles leclerc/fem!singer!reader

type: instagram imagine, social media au

notes: this is another thing i thought of knowing i have hundreds of unattended drafts lolol lmk what u think! this is like very similar to something i've posted before but only w a slightly different ending... hehe also am using mother taylor's lyrics cause they're just too good

about: you and charles seem to be really quiet, it's either one of two things — you're over or you're about to release a masterpiece that shatters all break up rumors.

wagsoff1

liked by wannabewag, norrisfan, hamilec, and 25,439 others

wagsoff1 It has been 100 days since Y/N was seen in the paddock. Her last appearance was during the 2023 Australian GP. Any thoughts? 👀

leclercsainz yeah honestly the two of them have been really quiet lately... i'm scared

ynfan this is such a reach? 😬

lecsyn4eva are we forgetting that y/n has her own career, a pretty successful one at that, it's normal for her to not be at races at times?

wagsoff1 Hmm yeah but she's missed a ton of races, apparently rumors are only ever growing that they might be over... lecsyn4eva maybe we stop sticking our noses where it doesn't belong 🤨

queenyn MOTHER WE MISS YOU pls come back

sainzstappen Classic pattern of broken up F1 couples lol miss a few races then suddenly statements are out 😆

popgirlstm stop i will literally jump off a bridge

yourusername

liked by zendaya, florencepugh, landonorris, and 2,340,923 others

yourusername At every table, I'll save you a seat.

My 3rd full-length album, Lover, is out tomorrow at 12 EST. Sorry for the surprise but see you at the premiere ❤️

lecsyn BITCH THIS IS WHY YOUVE BEEN QUIET

mothertay miss mam we havent heard from you in months how can you drop a bomb like this so casually

norrislaren IM CRYING I DID NOT SEE THIS COMING

midnightshouse y/n i need to know if i can shake my ass to this album or i will be destroying ice cream pints with tears on my face

ynalbums Judging from the title... it sounds like it's more on the romance side? gucciluv oh my god there's hope for charles and her after all 🙏

charles_leclerc

liked by pierregasly, carlossainz55, scuderiaferrari, and 1,295,294 others

charles_leclerc My lover.

Beyond excited for your album, amour. Thanks for letting me be a part of it 🤍

lecsyncharles CROWD CHEERS OH MY GOD

hamilstappen im crying they broke the streak they're alive! WAR IS OVER

charlierari part of it... y/n ft. charles????

carlossainz55 Hey this counts as your musical debut? 😆

charles_leclerc I didn't sing... carlossainz55 Yeah you shouldnt c2lovers FUCK??ABSHBHWWH

landonorris Can't believe people thought you broke up you literally won't shut up about how you're in Silverstone and she's in LA

pierregasly Don't forget the calling Y/N every 10 seconds charles_leclerc ??? Please shut up

Now Playing: Lover (Music Video) - The Dedication

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, landonorris, lorenzotl, and 2,109,294 others

charles_leclerc My forever lover.

tagged: yourusername

landonorris Will you save me a seat at every table?

yourusername Have my song memorized already, I see 😆 landonorris You know it!

lewishamilton Congratulations, Y/N and Charles! 🥂

danielricciardo I call taking most of the pictures 🙏

landonorris No???

ynlecs16 this is such a fucking surprise the two of you need to cool it down i'm hyperventilating

scuderiaferrari Best wishes to our favorite couple ❤️

yourusername Wait, I thought we broke up?

charles_leclerc Negative. You're stuck with me forever now 😘

---------

tagging: @slytherheign, @honethatty12, @siovhanroy

notes: taylor has got me wishing i was currently in love this is sick! anyway i only got this idea bc my tiktok fyp is swarmed with charles daylight edits and they are right he is so golden <33

[beanmachine69]

can you write a fake dating situation with lance stroll??

Now and Later | Lance Stroll

Fuck, not this again. 

This was one of the reasons you avoided hanging out with this particular group of friends back at home. Sure, they were great fun and all, but they all still had your stupid ex on instagram and were quite fond of posting stories- location tag and all included. They weren’t super close to you, but since you landed that fancy job in the media management department for Aston Martin, they just loved to pretend like they gave a damn about you or your life. Clubbing with them was fun though, and you needed a distraction from the stress your home-life had sprung at you. God, how you missed your old friend group, you were happy for them, but you really missed hanging out with them; they were fun, sweet, supportive, and were fully aware of how obnoxious your ex-boyfriend was. 

You had moved away from the dance floor when you saw him, hiding your face near the bar. He saw your group and was slowly advancing towards them, so as to not raise any alarms. You reached the bar and ordered another drink, if you were going to talk to that bastard, you were going to do it drunk. You downed the first drink faster than you expected and were ordering the second when you felt someones’ hand on your shoulder as they sat next to you on the bar. 

Welp, this was happening. 

You turned, adorning the most annoyed expression that you could, only to see your much loved (by you) colleague. His smile dropped when he saw your expression, confusion washing over his face. 

“Uh, hey is this a bad time?” He asked hesitantly. 

“Oh my God Lance, I’m so sorry, I thought you were someone else.” You apologized, expression dropping immediately as your face turned bright red.  

“Oh?” 

“Yeah, just some old problems that won’t fucking leave me alone.” You mumbled into your glass as you brought it to your face.

Lance laughed, and there began another problem which you’d been desperately trying to avoid. He looked so ridiculously adorable when he smiled, and even more so when he laughed. The way his usually intense eyes would soften and crinkle on the sides, and how cute he sounded when he laughed. God, having a crush on Lance was terrifying, not just because of the power dynamic, but also because you could never be sure if he actually reciprocated anything. You had caught him staring a few times before, but sometimes you’d also seen him completely zone out and stare at things, and so, for the sake of your own sanity, you brushed it off as that. 

“What type of problems are we talking about here?” He laughed, politely gesturing for the bartender to bring two of what you were having. 

“Oh y’know, I don’t wanna bore you.” You replied, almost embarrassed to be talking to him about this. 

He seemed to not have heard you, so he leaned in, allowing you to get a pretty good smell of his cologne. Sure, you’d been in accidental close proximity before, but this was so much more different. You both were out of the green Aston-Martin apparel you were accustomed to seeing each other in, and you were certain that he lingered a moment too long after you had repeated what you said. 

“Oh, you’re not boring me at all, I’d love to know more about you, we barely get to talk at work.” He replied, bringing his stool closer to yours, “Plus, I’d love to see what's got you drinking like this.” 

He had to have been drunk, or at least a little tipsy. You two had joked around and had your laughs before, but this just felt so different, he suddenly seemed so much more comfortable and confident. Maybe the lack of cameras and the general stress of the job was doing its magic or maybe it was your low-cut top that had him acting differently. Either way, you weren’t complaining. You liked it when Lance would talk to you, even more so when it would be a one-on-one conversation between you two. It always felt natural almost, like you two were great friends in the past or something. 

“Oh Lance, y’know how it is,” You tried stalling, there was no way you were going to dish about your ex with him, nope it was far too embarrassing, “This and that..”

“This and what? Come on, tell me already.” He laughed, determined to find out why you looked so stressed at a bar and why you had managed to finish your drink this fast again.

“I-” You were interrupted when you spotted your friend pointing at the bar, directing your ex towards you. Panic set in, and you knew you didn’t want to have this conversation, especially in front of someone who was technically your boss. 

Luckily for you, Lance was quick to read your eyes, following their direction and understanding that the man slowly approaching you two was definitely coming there with a purpose; considering the look in your eyes, he also understood that you weren’t particularly excited to be at the receiving end of this supposed purpose. He was slightly tipsy, and you looked really pretty tonight, so he decided to take a barely calculated decision. He knew he had to act fast, considering the man was barely a few feet away, Lance grabbed your face, turning it in his direction. Your eyes widened at the unexpected physical contact, barely managing to process it before he pulled you in for a kiss. His lips felt soft in contrast to how heated the kiss was, his lips passionately moving against yours as one of his hands slipped down to your waist, hooking his finger in the loop of your jeans and pulling you onto his lap. You were surprised, to say the least, but you reciprocated it nonetheless, leaning onto him as you straddled his lap, surprised at the stability of the stool you were seated on. And for a moment, when you two pulled away for air- and you locked your eyes into his- you forgot about the reason for the kiss, melting as his eyes looked in yours before he pulled your face in again, thumb stroking your cheek as he deepened the kiss. 

If it wasn’t for your ex clearing his throat, you two would have probably gone at it for longer, with neither one of you having any objections at all. You turned your face at the man who stood half a foot away from you two, staring angrily at you. You readjusted yourself in his lap, leaning into the facade, you brought a thumb near your lips, cleaning the slight smudge of your lipgloss.

“Hey.” He said, glaring at Lance. 

“Hi.” Lance smiled, both hands now on your waist. 

You could cut the tension with a knife if you wanted to, your ex-boyfriend had no right to be this annoyed, especially not at Lance. His anger was unjustified, and almost annoying, who was he to get mad if you were dating someone? It's not like he knew it was fake. 

“Who’s this babe?” Lance asked, looking at you with the sweetest eyes imaginable, making you melt momentarily. 

“I’m her ex-boyfriend.” He replied, inching closer to the two of you.

“Do you have somethinggg to say?” Lance asked, turning to him.

He opened his mouth for a minute, surprised at how direct the question was. This was definitely not what he was expecting.

“No?” Lance asked, barely allowing him to answer, “Alright, cool.” 

He turned back to kiss you, his hand finding its way back to your cheek that was now currently bright red. Sure, you thought Lance was pretending, but to him, he just saw this as an opportunity to act out on something he’d been feeling for a while now. He’d thought you were cute the moment he saw you, but it wasn't until he talked to you separately did he realize the fact that he liked you. He was way more than excited when he saw you walk into the club with your sexy little top on, and he was more than glad when you came towards the bar. Sure, he’d have wanted to ask you out in better circumstances, but he was definitely not going to complain about his current situation with you on top of him, slightly grinding on him as you two were making out infront of your bloke of an ex. 

You were the one to pull away, coming to your senses when you thought the room was clear to drop the pretense. You were flushed, your breath uneven as you fixed your top that hiked up slightly because of Lances’ exploring hands. 

“Uh,” You weren’t sure what to say, “Lance, I-” 

“I’m sorry for not asking, I just thought it’d be better than talking to that loser.” Lance chuckled. He wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or if it was how cute you looked when you were flushed, but he really did get an urge to drop all possible formalities. If you could have given that guy a chance, then maybe Lances’ odds weren’t so bad at the moment. Plus, at one point, he was certain neither of you were pretending. 

“No no, I didn’t mind that at all.” You replied, dipping your head down a little to hide the blush that was painting your face.

“Good girl.” Lance whispered, face close to your ear. 

You didn’t think you could blush any harder than you were at that moment. You felt like you were going to explode, everything had happened so fast, and you ran through so many emotions, you were practically feeling lightheaded. Chugging all those drinks didn’t help either, because now you were certain that you had passed out and this was all a dream. Snapping yourself back to reality, you became aware of the fact that you were sitting on Lance Strolls’ lap in a busy bar. You hopped off him, fixing your hair and lip gloss as you stood next to him, looking around to see if anyone had witnessed all that happened. Luckily your friends were too busy dancing and your ex hadn’t seemed to recognise Lance, you let out a sigh of relief.

“Uh, thanks for saving my ass right now,” You mumbled, barely able to look at him, “I really didn’t want to talk to that guy.”

“Hey,” Lance stood up, towering over you as his arms got a hold of your sides, prompting you to look up at him, “Are you alright?” 

“Yeah, just uh, a little surprised, that’s all.” 

“Surprised in a good way or a bad way?” He asked, eyes searching yours for any sign of discomfort.

“A good way.” You smiled, entranced by his eyes enough to not care about how hard you were blushing.

“Good, because I was hoping I could make this pretense a reality, and uh take you out for dinner tomorrow?” He asked, a small spark of hope in his eyes.

“Uh, yeah that sounds great.” You replied, almost needing to pinch yourself to accept the reality of the situation. 

“Great, I’ll pick you up at 8.” He smirked, “Why don’t you go tell your friends that you’re going home and I’ll drop you home right now.” 

-

-

-

-

A/N: Hi! sorry I got carried away, thank you so much for the cute request anon! I loved writing this, hope you liked it! <3

Also, I don't know if this was cliche? like I thought of a plus one to a friends wedding type of fic, but that was also kinda cliche? idk, I hope I didn't disappoint haha

As usual, my ask box is open for requests and criticism, lmk how you like it!!

[queenshelby]

Yes! Mr Murphy (Rewritten)

PART 30: SOCIAL MEDIA

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Warning: Lots of Angst, Age Gap, Teacher x Student, Pregnancy Loss, Infertility

Cillian and Nina walked into Cillian's apartment and plopped down on the sofa, exhausted from a long day. Nina absentmindedly scrolled through Instagram, her eyes widening at the sight of countless pictures you were tagged in from the theatre.

Curiosity getting the better of him, Cillian leaned over his daughter's shoulder to get a glimpse of what had caught her attention. His eyes widened as he saw the stunning images of you, showcasing your incredible talent on stage.

Cillian, never one for social media, thought for a moment before transforming into a wine connoisseur. He poured himself a glass and decided that perhaps, just this once, he could dip his toes into the digital world.

Cillian, not being so savvy in the world of social media, found himself intrigued by this unconventional way of peeping into people's lives and, with his newfound curiosity, he glanced at Nina, offering her a crooked grin.

"You know what? I think it's about time I joined the world of Instagram too. I mean, how hard can it be?" Cillian said, only half-serious.

Nina let out a hearty laugh, grabbing her phone. "Dad, I hate to break it to you, but I think they might have put an 'age restriction' on Instagram. You're probably breaking some kind of internet law just by thinking of signing up."

Determined not to be thwarted by his daughter's teasing, Cillian pushed forward. "I am young at heart, you know that. Besides, I want to see what all the fuss is about with this social media thing,” Cillian laughed.

"All right, Dad. Let's see if the world is ready for Cillian Murphy on Instagram then,” she giggled before warning him. “But don’t you dare follow me! Your request will be denied!” she told him, causing Cillian to furrow his eyebrows.

“Follow? What do you mean by that?” he asked obliviously just before Nina left the living room to retrieve her laptop from her bedroom while Cillian poured himself another glass of wine. Nothing like some liquid courage to tackle the world of social media.

As Nina set up his profile, Cillian couldn't help but start feeling a little giddy, thinking that he was doing something naughty while, deep down inside, reflecting on his feelings. He missed you. He missed your laughter, your touch, and the way you made his heart race.

A familiar ache settled in his chest as he thought about the reasons you two broke up. The age difference seemed significant at the time, but now, he couldn't deny his lingering love for you.

“All done. Just waiting for your verification because you are a celebrity after all,” Nina teased but Cillian had no idea what she was on about and reached for his mobile phone, which is where Nina had downloaded an app and signed him in.

“I have taken a photo of you from the Internet. Needless to say, there were plenty of them,” she joked before, eventually, explaining to her father how Instagram actually worked.

Then, after Nina finished setting up Cillian's profile and retreated to her room, Cillian held his phone, contemplating whether he should follow your Instagram account. His finger hovered over the "Follow" button, hesitating.

"To hell with it," Cillian then muttered to himself, clicking the button and grinning like a teenager who had just pulled off a secret prank.

***

Meanwhile, at a lively bar, you were enjoying a night out with your friends following your grand performance, laughing and sipping on colourful cocktails.

That's when it happened. A notification popped up on your phone—Cillian Murphy is now following you on Instagram.

You nearly choked on your drink. Was this some sort of prank, you wondered and, just as you became somewhat flustered by what you believed to be a joke, one of your new acquaintances at the academy tapped you on the shoulder as she too was reading your feed.

"Oh my god Y/N, Cillian Murphy actually commented on your post!" she exclaimed, eyes twinkling mischievously.

“Wait, what?” you asked before scrolling through the feed yourself and seeing that, not only had someone using Cillian’s name followed you, but also had this person left a comment, congratulating you on your performance.

“I doubt that’s real” another one of the dancers then said, pointing to the fact that the profile was not yet verified and, of course, you too were sceptical.

Thus, given Cillian's aversion to social media, you brushed off your friend’s excitement and told them to ignore this person who, clearly, was not Cillian Murphy. You were thinking that this was nothing more than a prank. But curiosity got the better of you anyway, and you decided to investigate.

Taking a leap of faith, you pulled out your phone and, with a mix of apprehension and hope, sent a message to the number you still had stored from your dating days.

"Cillian, is that really you commenting on my Instagram post or is someone playing a prank on me?" you typed, your words filled with both curiosity and hope. Hesitating for a moment, you pressed the 'send' button, watching as your message disappeared into the digital realm.

***

Back in Cillian's apartment, his phone buzzed, signalling a new message. His heart raced as he unlocked his phone and read the familiar name lighting up the screen.

Eyes widening, Cillian let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding. "It's her," he whispered, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

Slowly, he began to type a reply, his fingers gliding across the screen. "It's me. You were great" he texted, his heart pounding in his chest and you couldn't help but feel a mixture of disbelief and excitement coursing through your veins when you received his message.

You quickly texted back, "Well, colour me surprised! Didn't think you'd ever join the 21st century and get on social media!"

As you awaited his response, you took a sip of your cocktail and looked around the bar. Your friends were chatting animatedly, unknowing of the conversation happening on your phone.

A few seconds later, Cillian's reply popped up. "Well, I figured it was time to embrace the modern world, even if I'm still firmly rooted in the past," he teased. You laughed and typed back, "Ah, the classic case of a technologically-challenged heartthrob!"

You couldn't help but enjoy the playful banter with him despite everything that happened between you in the past. You were rather drunk though too and it felt like old times yet fresh and exciting at the same time. It reminded you of the chemistry you had when you first met.

“Pretty much You know it” Cillian texted before another message popped up.” So, what are you up to tonight? Celebrating your big opening?" it asked.

"I am just shaking a leg at a local bar with some friends. What are you doing?" you replied, adding a winking emoji to indicate your mischievous tone, knowing very well that Cillian hated emojis.

“Watching TV, texting with you, drinking wine, pretending to be a cool dad. Not much really” Cillian replied, adding an emoji of a smiling face and sunglasses.

“You know how to use emojis? God, what happened to you?” you responded, rolling your eyes as both of you continued to exchange messages, sharing funny anecdotes from your respective evenings. The conversation flowed effortlessly, reminding you of the easy banter you used to have.

With each new text, you felt a strange mix of nostalgia and longing. It had been almost three months since you and Cillian had broken up, but there was still a lingering connection between you and then, out of the blue, Cillian's next message caught you off guard. "I miss you," it read. Simple and straightforward.

You bit your lip, unsure of how to respond. The wound was still fresh, and you were afraid of opening it up again.

"Well, that's what happens when you break up with someone," you teasingly replied, trying to keep the conversation light, but Cillian did not let up.

“I regret breaking up with you," Cillian continued, causing you to almost choke on your drink.

This wasn't how you expected the conversation to go. But then again, nothing with Cillian ever went according to plan.

Taking a deep breath, you took the plunge and typed, "Listen Cillian, I admit that I miss you too. But you hurt me and this made things complicated. We can't just pick up where we left off."

The three dots appeared, indicating that Cillian was typing a reply. You held your breath, waiting for his words to materialize on the screen as the bar around you faded into the background.

"I understand," his message finally appeared. "But could we try? Just one date? Let's see where it takes us?” he then asked and you hesitated, uncertainty swirling within you. A part of you longed to reunite with Cillian, to see if there was still something worth salvaging. But another part feared getting hurt again, fearing that the age difference would always be a roadblock.

"All right, one date!" you finally replied, a mix of reluctance and hope in your response.

“Dinner tomorrow night?” he typed quickly, making your heart skip another beat.

“Dinner it is. But no promises about dessert!" you joked, lightening the mood again with your reply.

A beaming smile broke across Cillian's face as he read your response. It was a smile that could melt hearts, that could singlehandedly revive the 90s boy band craze. You almost regretted saying yes, but alas, the damage was done.

[emmedoesntdomath]

reasons why one should join the top gun fandom

(this is totally not a post aimed directly at a specific person, such as @needtobemedicated. definitely not. me? pfff- never.)

I want to preface this post with a disclaimer: these movies and this fandom are NOT just movies and a fandom that are for american military enthusiasts and veterans. while, of course, they are and can be to an extent, they are also for other groups of people who appreciate it for very different reasons. namely, the girls and gays who watch it for the ✨plot✨.

today, I will be selling these movies and fandom to said girls and gays with the ✨plot✨ and literally nothing else because nothing else is important.

reason #1- maverick and goose friendship

look, who doesn’t need a young, smirking, snarky tom cruise in their life? AND a cackling anthony edwards in the back, providing his best friend with absolutely no help whatsoever? sign me up.

reason #2- kelly mcgillis in 1986

look at her. just look at her.

#3: ICEMAN AND MAVERICK BANTERRRR

oh my god, the bantering. there are insults, subtle innuendoes, lil’ comments thrown here and there. *sniffs* it’s such a beautiful enemies to lovers I mean, friendship.

#4. training exercises

they’re playing a big game of tag with really expensive planes. I see no downsides here.

#5. YOUNG BRADLEYYYY

goodness gracious, great balls of fire

#6. volleyball

ha. (-coming from someone who’s not that attracted to anyone in the scene.)

#7. ICE AND MAV

because there’s no forced heterosexual relationship that makes me uncomfortable to speak of. nope. instead, there’s a lovely locker scene. yes, you read that right. I’ll just…leave that there.

#8. uh…a reason to cry?

I- yeah.

#9. MORE ICE AND MAV

tom cruise does his pilot thingie with the dots and plays tag with the other planes, and saves val kilmer. it’s enemies to lovers for a reason, people.

***casually skips ahead by more than thirty years***

#10. HANGMAN

glen powell is the captain of this fandom, and any other opinion is just wrong. sorry.

#11. PHOENIX

LOOK AT HERRRRRRR

#12. BOB

anyone named bob deserves love, okay?

#13. PAYBACK

his name is rueben.

#14. FANBOY

just yes.

#15. BRADLEYYYYYYYYYYYYY

miles teller saying “you look good” absolutely destroys me

#16. pool table

also yes. (thank you miles and glen)

#17. daddy issues

what’s a good story without a healthy dose of daddy issues? (nothing. that’s what it is.)

#18. parallels

ENEMIES TO LOVERS, ANYBODY? EXES VIBES, ANYBODY??

#19. ICE AND MAVVVVVV

my jaw was ON THE GROUND THE ENTIRE TIME

#20. football

ha. (pt. 2)

#21. pov: you’re crying. again.

…

#22. miracles one AND two

trust me, you will be rolling on the ground at the sheer audacity.

#23. talk to me, dad

THE DADDY ISSUESSSSS ARE A’COMIN

#24. PARALLELS PARALLELS PARALLELS

look, glen knows what he’s doing, ok? sir knows what he’s doing with that smirk and drawl. (and by what knows what he’s doing, I mean he is gleefully dumping fuel onto the fires of hangster media while miles is standing beside him laughing) (I adore them both)

#25. and then they all lived happily ever after

…they did, ok, shut up.

there’s a full list of reasons. you’re welcome.

[sparkles-oflight]

Traces of kisses behind closed doors

Welcome to another fanfic of mine! I know you can read these separately, but I would actually recommend reading Kamila for some references you might miss if you don't.

Synopsis: Moments before Damon uploaded chapters 3 and 4, Bojan and Kris, and Nace and Jan talk about things that only happen behind closed doors.

This is like Hurt/comfort I think? Honestly, I'm not good at tagging things.

Disclaimer: Please think of these as characters and not the actual people. I don’t encourage anyone to send this to any of the actual JO members nor do I encourage people to force any type of relationship between anyone.

Sensible themes implied: Homophobia

Sitting in the bed that now belongs to him and his lover, Kris scrolled on his phone. Posting pictures, reading comments, seeing people freaking out through stories - in general, just trying to keep up with the flow of information and hype.

He felt two arms around his waist and a soft kiss on his arm.

- Reading comments? - Bojan asked as he tried to glance over his phone screen.

- Yes. - he smiled.

- You are insane. That would just trigger my anxiety.

- Well, I'm not you. - he smiled as he turned to him - I'm not a small flower that can break easily or be simply blown in the wind.

- Oh, feeling poetic, are we? I see.

- Maybe.

Kris kissed him, and, with his hand, he inclined Bojan's chin making the smaller one sit. Bojan savored that soft buttery kiss, yet he couldn't help but smile.

- What? - Kris asked while the other one laughed - What?

- I like seeing you like this. - his fingers started tapping Kris' hands, then arms, inspecting each centimeter of his limbs - I'm glad you enjoyed taking those pictures with Damon. And I'm even more glad you felt free to express yourself... Ever since-

- I know. - Kris took one of Bojan's hands and held it - Hey...do you know what Damon told me, Bojči?

Every time Kris called Bojan by his nickname it made his heart skip a beat. Sure, it's just a nickname that everyone calls him by, but coming from Kris' mouth makes it sound so different and relaxing...Bojan wanted to beg Kris to sing his name to his ear every single night because.... he loves Kris' voice when he's affectionate... God, he needed to stop himself from thinking about it for too long.

- Bojan? You good? You are drooling.

Bojan put his hand in his mouth only to realize he wasn't drooling.

- HAHA, I'm just fucking with you! - he laughed - In all seriousness, Damon told me you were the luckiest man in the world.

- Yet he decided to upload your pictures before mine. - he pouted, turned his head to the side, and crossed his arms.

- Oh? Are you jealous I'm his one muse?

- Maybe. - Kris turned his chin to him softly and kissed him again as Bojan relaxed his body - Or maybe...not. - he talked as Kris kissed him over and over again.

Bojan's mouth found its way to Kris' shoulder and then hand.

- I love your skin.

- Just my skin?

- And your company. And your kisses. – Kris’ hand ran through Bojan's chest - And your hair, and your voice, your eyes, and your beauty... On the inside and outside.

- I only believe I'm beautiful because of you...

- And I'm here to remind you of it every day.

Kris' eyes lit. How he had wished he were with Bojan since day one, but he would no longer waste any time separated from his soulmate... Not ever.

While kissing behind those closed doors, two other boys were in the living room relaxing - or trying to. Nace sat down as he scrolled through social media and Jan laid on the sofa with his legs on top of Nace's thighs and simply looked at the ceiling. His nail polish had practically vanished from his nails, and he was now completely far away from our reality, lost in thought.

Suddenly, he was awake by the touch of Nace, who had put his phone away, on his legs.

- What are you worried about? - Nace asked.

- Damon's pictures.

They had both talked about it before. Even if they were comfortable with each other - more than with anyone else in the world - even if their friends supported them and their relationship...What about the rest?

- Nace...We are from the Balkans. - Jan suddenly blurted it out.

Nace traced his legs with his fingers.

- Everyone around us seems to be okay with our relationship...but what if they aren't? And what about the band? - he began spiraling - What if these photos we post destroy the band's image? What are people going to say when we get back home?

- And you want people who don't love you for who you are near you? - he asked but got no response.

Nace kissed Jan's exposed ankles and then used his hands to help the younger sit on his lap and look into his eyes.

- Jan...I need you to know you are not alone in this.

- I know. - Jan rested his forehead against Nace's - I'm just so tired.

- I know.

Nace knew Jan was tired mentally, he always was. Nace knows why but wouldn't dare to share it with the world. That's the one thing he just wouldn't, not even Damon would get that out of him. That was their secret.

- What if... - Jan grabbed Nace's ears and hair - What if someone tries to hurt you?

- Jan... Have you seen how I look? Most people would run away thinking I would beat them.

- Nace, but everyone knows you don't even hurt a single fly because you love animals so fucking much-

Nace shut him up with a kiss. Then Jan took control of it, making Nace incline more and more on the sofa. Nace placed his hand underneath Jan's shirt to feel his skin. Nace's warm hands filled up Jan's soul, and, when they would stop kissing each other from time to time, they would let some moans escape their lips.

- Better? - Nace asked.

- So much better.

- It's normal to have fears but guess what: I'll be for you anytime. Just like you are for me.

- Thanks. - Jan didn't dare to look at Nace in the eyes.

If he did, he would cry over his big brown eyes. How could he protect this man so important to him? That was his only wish.

But he also thought, that maybe, and just maybe, “being behind closed doors of a closet was bett-“

- Don't you dare think that. - Nace read him like a book.

- Of course not. - he finally looked at him and smiled - I was never going to let those thoughts win.

♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩

Don't ask me what are Kris and Jan's secrets because it happened behind closed doors :)

MASTER POST | Recommended next: Ginger shots - lazy day

[ereardon]

My Girl [Chapter 2][Jake "Hangman" Seresin x OC]

Summary: Jake Seresin could be the answer to all of your dating woes. He’s the full package: steady job, mature, dependable, attractive to a fault. The polar opposite of every guy your age and he’s everything you’ve ever wanted in a partner. But there’s one roadblock: he’s a single father to four-year-old Ellie. Jake is looking for a level of commitment you’re not quite sure you’re ready to give, and he’s not willing to bring someone into his daughter’s life who isn’t there for the long haul. And even if you are stepmom material, is Jake ready to let someone back in his life while still mourning the recent loss of his late wife? 

Pairing: Jake “Hangman” Seresin x OC [Lawyer Natalie West]

WC: 3.4K

Warning: Age gap, cursing, slight smut, mention of death

Series masterlist here

Please fill out this form here to join my tag list

You couldn’t stop thinking about Jake’s hands. The veins that stood out underneath his tanned skin, his thick fingers that you wanted wrapped around your thigh as he fucked you. It wasn’t until someone tossed a file on your desk that you snapped out of it. 

“Hello? Natalie?” 

You looked up to see Rebecca, another associate, standing above your desk. The two of you had started around the same time and became fast friends. Finance, particularly asset management, was predominantly male so it was nice to have another woman around to cut through the bullshit. 

“Shit, sorry,” you said, grabbing the folder and pulling it onto your lap. “What’s up?” 

Rebecca smiled and perched on the edge of the desk, crossing her mile long legs. “OK spill. Who is he?” 

You blushed and tried to hide it with the folder, but Rebecca pulled it away from your face. 

“Seriously, tell me,” she said in a whisper as a partner rounded the corner. Once he was out of earshot you two rolled your eyes. Patrick Donnovan was notoriously anti-socializing and he had been the last partner to sign on for both of your hires. He was, to put it lightly, the worst. 

“His name is Jake,” you said and Rebecca tried to hide a squeal. She had been with her boyfriend Harris for almost five years and told you repeatedly that she had to live vicariously through her single friends. “We met like three weeks ago at the grocery store. He’s so fucking hot, Becks, you wouldn’t believe it.” 

She kicked her feet in their stilettos and you laughed when one crashed against the filing cabinet under your desk. “Do you have pics?” 

You shook your head. You’d tried to stalk Jake on social media, but he didn’t have an Instagram or even a Facebook. It only served to underscore the age difference. But then a thought popped into your mind and you grabbed your phone. “Wait,” you said and Rebecca leaned over as you pulled up Instagram and searched Top Gun’s flight school. There was one page, largely educational, but you scrolled down a few times to a group photo, Jake standing in the back in an olive green flight suit and a pair of aviators. You pressed your finger to the screen. “There, second from the right.” 

“Holy shit,” Rebecca said, prying the phone out of your hands and zooming in with her finger. “I would leave Harris on the side of the road if this man ever even looked in my direction.” 

You laughed and wiggled your fingers and she reluctantly gave you the phone back. “There’s one thing though.” 

“Oh God, there always is, isn’t there?” she said. “Alright, what’s his red flag?” 

“Less of a red flag,” you replied. “More baggage I guess? He has a daughter. Her name is Ellie, she’s four.” 

Rebecca’s eyebrows shot up. “A kid? Wow.” 

“I know.” 

“Have you met her?” 

Another head shake. “No, but he wants me to. On Thursday.” 

Her eyes went wide. “That’s huge.”

“I don’t know shit about kids,” you huffed, tossing the folder onto the desk. You grabbed the to-go coffee cup from near your keyboard and gulped down the last third of it before tossing it in the trash with a sigh. “What if she hates me? What do I say to her? What the fuck do I bring as a gift?” 

“Gift?”

“Oh didn’t I mention?” you said. “It’s her fourth birthday party that he’s invited me to.” 

“Holy shit,” Rebecca said, leaning forward and letting out a small cackle. “Wow this guy is really into you if he’s inviting you to his daughter’s birthday.” She paused. “Wait, what about the mother?” 

“I literally never thought about it,” you said quietly. “He just told me two days ago. I was so caught up in the whole kid thing I didn’t even think about his ex-wife.”

“So he’s divorced?”

“I just assume so. I know shockingly little about his personal life apparently.” 

Rebecca stood and smoothed out her dress. “You should just ask. It’s better to know than play games in your mind and get yourself all worked up.” 

“Ugh, you’re right.” 

“Also the ICID contract is ready for review, that’s what’s in the folder.” 

You slumped back into your chair as she walked away and pulled up your last message exchange with Jake. Part of you wanted to bail on Thursday, but you knew what message that would send. Instead, you pulled up Google and searched for the closest kid’s activity store. 

***

The next night, the doorbell rang just as you were flipping a load of laundry. You squinted at the fluorescent clock on the microwave. It was after nine. 

Cautiously, you tiptoed down the hallway and peered through the glass pane to the side of the door, saw Jake standing there bouncing from leg to leg. 

You swung the door open. “Jake?” 

“Natalie, hi,” he said. “Can I, uh, come in?” 

“Of course.” You opened the door wider, ushering him in. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to your cheek and you smiled. “What’s up?” 

He looked nervous. Or more accurately, he looked frazzled. You were starting to see a pattern. His shirt was rumpled, the ties on his sneakers were a bit loose and his hair looked like he had been running his fingers through it. “Ellie’s sick, so I have to cancel tomorrow night.” 

“Oh no,” you said, reaching out and placing your hand on his upper arm. “Is she OK?”

He shrugged. “I think it’s the flu, but her fever is pretty bad.” 

You looked around. “Wait, where is she right now?” 

“She’s at home with a friend of mine. She’s sleeping, I had to run out for more medicine and thought I’d stop by on my way to tell you in person that I’m really sorry.” 

“Honey,” you said softly, “there’s nothing to be sorry about.” 

He raked a hand through his hair. “I just, I didn’t want you to get the impression I chickened out or something.”

You smiled. “Jake, no, of course not.”

“Because I like you a lot, and I do want you to meet her,” he added. There was a pause. “But I am worried I kind of jumped the gun.” 

The moment the words left his lips you felt relief flood your body. “If we’re being honest, I was a little nervous,” you said and you watched the tension melt from his features. “Maybe we hold off for a little while? I feel like you and I are still just getting to know each other.” 

He nodded, his tanned face softening into a smile. “I think you’re right.” 

You shifted forward, winding your arms around his neck and Jake grinned, one large hand coming to your waist as he leaned down to kiss you. His lips were smooth and he kissed with an intensity that made every inch of your body ache with yearning. You wanted him, desperately, small mewls escaping your mouth and you felt Jake chuckle against your lips. 

“God, you’re sexy, Sugar,” he whispered, one hand dipping lower, squeezing your ass. “Whining like that when I kiss you.” 

Pulling back, you smiled shyly and Jake traced a finger over your cheek. “I can’t help it,” you said softly. 

“Never apologize for that,” Jake murmured, dipping down and pressing a quick kiss beneath your ear, his hands now on your sides, thumbs grazing the undersides of your breasts. You pressed your thighs together, knowing you weren’t wearing a bra and he could feel the soft curves beneath his fingertips. When he pulled away, there was a dark lust in his eyes. “Sweetheart I want you so bad, but I really should go. Wish I could stay longer.” 

You gave him a soft smile. “It’s OK, I understand.” 

Jake kissed your temple and turned to the door, but you stopped him. “Wait! One second, I have something for you.” 

He paused and you rushed off to the guest bedroom, emerging with a small pink backpack. It was glittery, and you had asked the workers to embroider Ellie’s name in cursive at the top near the handle. You had filled the bag with games, books, a few toys, a fuzzy blanket, and an assortment of candies that you hoped Jake would let her eat. You didn’t know Ellie, but you could just picture an adorable little girl with Jake’s features wearing the glittery backpack on her small shoulders.  

“Here,” you said, rolling it forward and giving Jake the handle. “For Ellie, when she feels better.” 

Jake looked down at the backpack, the big ribbon bow you had tied on the top handle, and then up at you. For a moment, you thought maybe he was disappointed in the gift. “It’s more than just a backpack,” you rushed to say. “There’s games and stuff inside. I don’t know what kids like, Jake, I’m flying a little blind here, I don’t even have nieces or nephews….” 

His hand dropped from the handle and he stepped forward quickly, pulling you into his arms and cutting you off mid sentence. His hands cupped your face as he leaned down to kiss you. When he pulled away, you saw the small creases in the corners of his eyes as he smiled. “You’re fucking perfect, did you know that?” he whispered. His eyes were trained on yours and you felt yourself melting under his touch. 

“Go,” you murmured, pushing him playfully. “If you keep looking at me like that there’s no chance I’m going to let you leave here tonight.” 

Jake laughed and pulled away, biting his lip as he grabbed the backpack and looked back at you. “I’ll call you tomorrow?” he asked softly. 

You nodded. “Goodnight, Jake.” 

You watched him sling the small pink backpack over his shoulders as he walked down your driveway to his Range Rover. Somehow it was the sweetest, sexiest thing you had seen from him yet. Your lips tingled where he had touched you. 

You were down bad for Jake Seresin.

***

Jake called the next night right at ten. 

“Hey,” you said, setting the phone down on speaker next to the stove where you were stirring a pot of pasta. “How’s Ellie?” 

“Took her to the doctor today,” he said and you heard the exhaustion in his voice alone. “It’s the flu, but her fever was really high so I’m just watching it. If it gets really bad for a longer duration we have to go to the ER but I think she’s on the mend.” 

You set down the wooden spoon on the top of the pot and breathed out a sigh of relief. “OK well that’s good. Keep me updated?” 

You could hear the gentle squeak of a door opening on Jake’s end, like he was checking on Ellie. After a moment, you heard him walking. “I’m sorry again for canceling,” he said. 

“Jake, God, do not be sorry. Poor Ellie being sick on her birthday.” 

“I know, I feel awful.” 

“You’ll have to make it up to her.” 

“Definitely. And she was really excited about the funfetti cake,” he said softly and you smiled. 

“Wait so that cake mix you were buying when we met was for her birthday?”

Jake let out a chuckle. “I had to do a practice run. I’ve never baked a thing in my life and I didn’t want to ruin her birthday by making something inedible.” 

“You’ve never baked before?” you asked, straining the pasta into a colander in the sink. 

“Never. That was always her mom’s thing. She was a lot better at that stuff than I was.”

You paused and so did Jake. It was the first time he had brought up his ex in the conversation. You weren’t sure where to take it from there. Biting your lip, you grabbed the phone and turned it off speaker. 

“Jake…” you started and he quickly cut you off. 

“Sweetheart, I should go, I can hear Ellie fussing in her room. I’ll text you, OK?” 

He said it in such a rushed way you wanted to believe him, but part of you was convinced it was a lie. Something you couldn’t argue that would get the both of you off the phone so he didn’t have to explain his divorce to you at that moment. “Yeah, of course. Goodnight, Jake.” 

“Night honey,” he said softly, ending the call. 

You leaned back against the countertops, the steam of the pasta fogging the window above the sink. 

How could you ever live up to the woman Jake had, at one point, chosen to marry?

***

Jake’s house had a wrap-around porch and three rocking chairs in the front. You settled on one as Jake shut the door quietly, carrying two wine glasses and an uncorked bottle of red. He sat down on the seat next to you, placing the glasses and bottle down on the small table. 

“Thanks for coming to me,” he said, pouring you a glass of wine and holding it out. 

Your fingers brushed his as you grabbed the stem of the glass. “Of course. Your house is really nice.” 

Jake leaned back in the chair. “I always loved the idea of a front porch. My grandmother’s house had one, and we’d sit out there at night after dinner, talking, playing cards. It was always the best time.” He looked over at you. “I promise someday soon I’ll actually invite you in.” 

You smiled. Ellie was asleep inside. Jake was supposed to have a babysitter, one of his coworkers, but they flaked and instead of canceling your date he had invited you over after Ellie’s bedtime for a drink. “I’m going to hold you to that.” 

It had been six weeks since you first met Jake, but sometimes the way he looked at you still made you feel weak. 

You had also yet to sleep with him, which only served to magnify the sexual tension.

Part of you was worried it had something to do with you. But the reasonable part of you knew that between his work schedule, your hours at the firm and Ellie, there just wasn’t much time to sneak in alone time let alone naked alone time. 

You stood up, wine glass in hand, and leaned against the railing of the porch, looking out. Jake’s house was on a hill that sat above a park and small wooded area, highly irregular for San Diego. It was a breath of fresh air, literally. 

“How was work?” you asked, turning around and Jake gave you a soft, tired smile from his chair, taking a sip of wine. 

“Long,” he sighed, putting the glass down and coming to stand in front of you, his large hands on your waist. You could feel the warmth of his fingers on your skin between where your shirt rode up and the top of your cutoffs. “I don’t want to talk about work,” he whispered. 

“What do you want to talk about?” you replied quietly. 

“Are we dating?” he blurted out and you looked up in shock. Jake seemed embarrassed, the tips of his ears growing pink, and his hands fell from your waist, one hand running through his hair nervously. “Shit, I didn’t mean to say it like that.” 

“What did you mean to say?” you asked slowly. 

He pushed his hands into his pockets. “Well that’s what I wanted to say, I just intended to make it come off a lot more casual and cool,” he murmured and you laughed, which caused his eyes to light up. 

“Well I don’t know, are we dating?” you said. 

Jake tilted his head. “I like you, Natalie. A lot. I’m not seeing anyone else. I don’t want to see anyone else. But if you are, I would understand.” He looked back at the house before turning to you. “I’m asking a lot of you. To wait to meet Ellie. Everything we’re doing is on my schedule and I’m painfully aware of that. You’re young and beautiful and so intelligent and I just want you to know that I care about you and I respect your time.” 

You reached out, stroking one hand down his face. “You could have just said yes,” you whispered. “But that was much better.” 

His lips met yours as you tugged on his shirt collar, pulling him forward, his hands gripping the porch railing on either side of your body as you leaned back against the white wood, feeling the railing dig into your lower back. When you broke apart, Jake grinned. “Will you be my girlfriend, Natalie West?” 

You smiled. “I think I already am.” 

Jake’s lips were back on yours, and you tugged gently at this hair before attaching your lips to his neck, drawing a moan from Jake’s mouth. His hands slid beneath your shirt, cupping gently over your bra and you found yourself rubbing your core against the knee he had slotted between your legs. 

You pulled your lips from Jake’s mouth, dropping your hand to his belt and fumbling with the buckle before sliding it open and pulling down the zipper. Jake groaned and pitched forward, and you palmed him over his boxer briefs. He was hard, and massive. You tried to hide your surprise as you reached down further, brushing over the full length of his cock. There was a small wet patch at the tip of his cock, and you rubbed a small circle over it, causing him to twitch. Just as you were about to slide your hand below his underwear, Jake reached out and grabbed your wrist. 

“Shit, wait,” he said softly and you looked up in surprise. “I, uh, there’s something I need to tell you.” 

He redid the zipper on his shorts and pulled the belt together, taking a step back and inhaling deep. 

“I haven’t had sex since my wife passed away last year.” 

“What?” You didn’t mean for it to come out as loudly as it did. You both turned and looked at the house through the front window for a few moments to see if there was movement in the hallway, that Ellie had woken up, but it was clear. “Sorry, what?” you repeated, softer. 

Jake sighed and ran one hand down his face. “My wife Lizzie died last November. I haven’t really dated anyone seriously since.” 

“Jake,” you whispered. You weren’t sure if he wanted to be touched or held, but that’s all you wanted to do. Hold him and brush your fingers through his hair. “I’m so sorry.” 

He shook his head but you could tell he was getting choked up. “It’s been hard, you know, with Ellie. And I just, I haven’t really wanted to date anyone else.” He looked up. “Until I met you.” 

You stepped forward, taking his hands in yours, feeling his fingers curl around your own. “Thank you for telling me.” 

Jake gave you a light squeeze. “Sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.” 

“Don’t be. You told me when you were ready.” 

He rubbed his hands over your forearms. “It’s not that I don’t want to be intimate with you, Natalie. I do, I really do. It’s just, I’m so out of the loop on how this works. I haven’t dated in a decade. Lizzie and I, we got married really young. She was the only woman I ever slept with.” 

You could feel your eyes boggling out. How could someone as ridiculously attractive as Jake have only slept with one woman in thirty-five years? 

“Am I freaking you out?” he asked quietly and you heard the sadness and anxiety in his voice. “God, I’m scaring you away aren’t I?” 

Reaching up, you pressed your hands to his face. “Jake, no. I’m not fleeing for the hills. I’m not wearing the right shoes for that.” 

He laughed.

“You’re a really rare kind of guy,” you added. “I don’t think I’ve ever met someone like you before.” 

“Is that good or bad?” he asked. 

You smiled, draping one arm over his shoulder, Jake’s eyes locked on yours, his hands gripping your waist tightly. “It’s good. It’s really good.” 

When he sealed his lips on yours, you knew that even if you had to wait six more weeks or six more months, Jake Seresin was the kind of guy worth waiting for. 

Tag list: @xoxabs88xox @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @abaker74 @novagreen04 @townmoondaltwistle @rosiahills22 @indynerdgirl @entertainmentgal8 @misshoneypaper @topguncultleader @double-j @amortentiadrops @double-j @hangmandruigandmav @momc95 @minamisulemisa @shawnsblue @blue-aconite @brehonodea @crthurston @angelbabyange @jason-toddsthighs @secretsicanthideanymore @entertainmentgal8 @starkleila @boringusername3 @mandylove1000 @lilyevanswhore @mizzzpink @showmethewayhomehoney @lovingjakeseresin

[antimony-medusa]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers.

I was tagged by @regicidal-optimism

In no particular order:

A World Away (A Step Apart), (14,531 words) my OW superhero/supervillain romance with identity shenanigans, a dystopian world, and in-world supervillain RPF social media posts. This one was so fun to write. I've spent a lot of time on various social medias over the years and I delved into it for the fake discourse, and some of those social media jokes are some of my favourite things I've written. Plus I got to make up two guys that I love, OW is so fun.

A Hundred Things You Have Not Dreamed Of, (27,743 words), a DSMP emduo au in a vaguely superhero au about coming back from dehumanization. This fic was the one where I had to go holy shit I really do keep writing about food as healing I need to start tagging that on my fic, but also I just had a great deal of fun delving into, on the one hand, the hurt/comfort of expecting pain and not getting it, and on the other hand, the actual legitimate joys you can find in the small good things of a life you're choosing to live, even if baldly speaking it's not a great life. Like these guys don't know how to cook, and they live in a shitty apartment, and they have minimum wage food service jobs and don't have internet, but they also have friendship and community and 3 meals a day, and a laptop that can play videos, and that can also be something to appreciate. Plus it was a really fun challenge to take characters who basically don't act like the characters at all, because of trauma, and show them gradually growing into themselves. I still love this one a lot.

three deaths, no burials, one sunrise, (804 words). Oh boy. This one. DSMP, and c!wilbur focused, and second person, and inspired by a richard silken poem and a ursula vernon speech and a post about how wilbur didn't get a grave. At this point I don't even know if that's true canon, but I love this fic for how completely it took over my brain, I sat down and wrote it in one setting. Fuckin' pulled out of me like unspooling rope hand over hand. Having complicated feelings about your death and how it was marked or unmarked by the people around you, and exploring that through video game statistics, is something that can be so personal.

The Totem Of Undying Job, (62,696 words), DSMP, the syndicate heist Las Nevadas. So oh man, this was written in the era of the prison arc and you can probably tell, but I am still proud of how much I went into existing lore for the characterizations, not to mention proud of pulling off a long-fic. I keep thinking of it and going "man I should write more prey duo", or "I should write more tntduo", or "dang, beeduo slaps", or what have you. The first full and complete novel-length thing I had written in almost a decade, and I still think it hangs together, concepted and written entirely just me with myself in a google doc. The way I approach writing is very different nowdays, but I still love this one and I'm proud of pulling it off.

And honestly there's a lot of fics jockeying for this final spot, but I will give it to Soothing Natural Energies by Rebalancing External Wealth, Today, At Rekindled Flames Marriage Therapy Conference, (4,482 words), my origins sneegza marriage fraud shenanigans heist. I wrote this one in 24 hours for an exchange, and I was absolutely digesting my own stomach with anxiety the whole time, but I got it done, and then I posted and people said it was funny! And it had good worldbuilding! They liked it! And I drank some coffee and sat down to read it and went what do you know, I also like this, I think it's funny. Sometimes when I go oh god can I actually write comedy I go back to this one and I remind myself that yes, I can feel out how punchlines work. Also that I should write more origins, it's delightful.

tagging: @chrysalizzm, @imperialkatwala, @creetchure, @lennjamin-o7, @droidofmay

(don't feel obligated, any of you, I was just mentally paging through the people I follow trying to find people who hadn't already been tagged.)

[stackthedeck]

i need someone who understands to commiserate with me.

WHY are people marking spider-man - all media types when they mean "twinky tiny teeny baby tom holland and papá stark and ooh sometimes big hulking predatory gay teen fucker deadpool (i think thats his name ive never read a comic but i know he hears voices oooOohooH)" thats NOT ALL MEDIA TYPES THATS THE FUCKING TOM HOLLAND MOVIES

they can like that! i dont CARE. what i care about is intentionally obfuscating your fic premise, thereby making ME read it 😭😭😭

i know spideytorch is your fav flame but at least many torch knowers know about smth besides the movies 😔😔

(have a good day, i needed to bitch and i was like. he is the only one who will truly understand 💛)

Anon I feel you I bitch about this every day lmao the exclude mcu button on ao3 is my best friend! Like listen mcu fans can do whatever they want but like fandom etiquette dictates that if I don’t like I shouldn’t read so it’s common courtesy for them to say exactly what the fic is so I can know that I’m the type of fan who doesn’t like it so I won’t read it. Like I’ve been 5k words into pretty alright Spider-Man fic and then I’m hit with the “mr.stark” and I’m like god where’s my Spider-Man that doesn’t respect billionaires it’s crushing every time. And like hey mcu fans, y’all are the majority here if people want Tom Holland Spider-Man they’re searching that fandom tag so use it so more of your intended audience can read your fic!

I’ll be honest with you anon the reason I’m so into spidey torch is because 1 it’s a semi popular ship and 2 spidey torch fans tend to be obsessed with the comics sometimes for both the boys but they’re a super fan of at least one. The fantastic four have had nothing but shitty adaptations so their comic fandom is bigger than their movie fandoms it’s wonderful. I don’t really ship Johnny with Peter beyond like oh they probably were a friends with benefits situation or a Johnny is way more hopelessly in love situation. Nah the real goat of Johnny Storm ships is Johnny and Wyatt Wingfoot that is a power couple that can stand the test of time. But unfortunately it’s a very small tag and there’s quite a few writers who don’t know how to be normal about Native Americans. But my diehard spidey ship is parksborn and that tag is such a mixed bag! Sometimes it’s like the perfect replication of the comic dynamic, sometimes it’s the Raimi movies (functionally two different characters but also fun), something to do with the cartoons (not my thing because they’re kids doing high school drama), whatever the fuck Andrew Garfield had going with that dying Victorian orphan, or Harry is the evil ex but like evil the same way Norman was like fuck off!

Anyway spidey torch is the only spidey dude slash ship that has like consistently good fics but all the other ships you’ve gotta sift through a lot of bull shit but it’d be so much easier to find what I want if people would just tag their shit correctly!

Anyway thank you for bitching with me anon. Reminder: fuck the mcu until Sabra is removed from captain America 4, pirate your movies and comics and don’t buy shit from them. Pirate spectacular Spider-Man comics and every single Wyatt Wingfoot appearance

[moregraceful]

#i should post the pregnant cat side fic on ao3...that was a really tender side story

I’m currently Jennifer Lawrence asking what do you mean? What 😭 do you 😭 mean? But without the pressure. I, too, have been frustrated by my lack of writing. If you ever feel like sharing even a scrap of that little side story, even just sharing bullet points, I would eat that shit up. But no pressure!! I’m even thankful you even posted the original story. I am also clearly, not afraid to shoot my shot lol

no omg please. i love to talk about my fic and your photoset is like the nicest thing anyone's done for my fics unprompted. it makes me so happy...thank YOU!

i had to go 21 pages back in my #unfortunate birdcage fanfictions tag to find the fic. i am always so happy to share it because i love it as a little scene, and then am always so distressed none of my metadata and cataloging classes in library school actually changed any of my social media behaviors so my blog is and will always be an absolute nightmare to navigate. lol anyway!!: god is a small pregnant cat in the sun // “and we’re all too small to talk to god” // jamie meets a cat

rest under a cut bc i suffer from fatal can't shut up when someone shows one iota of interest in my fic disease...

i was eating yogurt tonight and pondering this au after your ask!! and as with everything i write for hrpf, it's always in a constant state of evolution, when players come and go or i rewatch miyazaki films or w/e. but here are some thoughts i had, unrelated to jamie and jared:

tomáš is a grizzled fisherman with a kind heart, who spends most of his time fishing alone

future captain matty sells tuna's fish at the fish market but he sucks at it bc he's too nice to old grandmas who want nice fish but pretend they don't have enough money to buy it (they do, he's just a dummy). tuna has to hire a second person to help, but unfortunately that person is will borgen

obviously will and captain matty are harboring enormous crushes on tuna and deal with it by acting out (juggling fish across the booth to make him shout at them)

in the past i have said joey daccord is a gardener for chris and philipp and this still true, however sometimes i think he helps out with the early morning shift at the mccann bakery and will load like bread and cookies into his truck and take them down to the fish market so that....

eeli can sell them at his jam stand. eeli's jam makes you feel one of two emotions: unbridled euphoria or catastrophic depression. you never know what is going to happen. two jars of the same strawberry jam can alter the trajectory of your life in two different ways. and much like pregnancy, once you eat it and have a horrible time, it releases endorphins and then you're like actually that wasn't so bad, and you go back to his jam and mccann bakery bread stand and he looks at you beatifically and says, oh you liked it? :)

And then of course for Jared and Jamie:

most critically the one single time jared makes it out to the lighthouse (VERY sneakily bc like...that's a worksite lol harbormaster grubauer is kind but not soft) to Spend The Night, they obviously have very dreamy tender night time sex but ALSO the ghosts are quiet and jamie sleeps through the night without waking ONCE because that's true love babey!! jared ofc does not sleep at all because foghorns are loud lol

i outlined a longform version of this fic uhhh in dms with @bakingblues once i think, where jamie is veteran of (unspecified) armed conflict and he is running from what he did (also unspecifed) and he like is like i must punish myself and live alone to atone for my sins (unspecified but knowing me it's probably like...the Inherent Cruelty of War and not like anything that would get him tried in the hague) which is why he takes a lighthouse job. and in the whole fic it's totally unclear if he is being haunted by ghosts (real) or ghosts (ptsd). and ofc jared's gentle and constant love for him does not like Heal him but as with all love it makes the ghosts easier to bear

lorna prompted me a million years ago with jamie + jared + seashells i think? or oyster shells? and i never finished the fic bc i'm the worst but here's how it goes: one time after a storm the island is COVERED in oyster shells, like hundreds, maybe thousands, of them, and it was a bad bad bad storm and the ghosts were so loud and jamie didn't sleep at all and he's so tired and so lonely, but he's not scheduled to leave the lighthouse that week. so instead of doing his work, jamie spends the day picking up dozens and dozens of the most intact oyster shells. and he very patiently figures out how to drill holes in them and string them together with fishing line and it takes him all day but by the time it's time to turn on the lighthouse light, he has made a big intricate windchime for jared and his cousins. and when he finally makes it off the island three weeks later, he gives it to jared and his cousins. they all are soooo charmed and the girls hang it outside the door of their bakery immediately even though that is so excruciatingly embarrassing for jamie. however jared gives him the kind of hug that makes you fall in love with a guy and jamie, well, he's got a soft heart.

thank you for sending this ask!!!!

[sungbeam]

𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐝𝐨! — two

ep. 02 ☆ big brother *gulps*

1.5k words (whoops sorry) + social media

Xu Minghao literally could not believe his eyes when he saw you walk into the living room of the SVT frat house, clad in a cool leather jacket and dark, pleated skirt. You had your arm tucked into Xiaojun's as the two of you searched for the best way to get from one end of the living room to the kitchen across. 

Christ, you were so goddamn pretty. Minghao couldn't even describe in words how effortlessly you made his heart pound in his chest with a simple look. You hadn't even looked in his direction, actually. Where he was, tucked away and out of people's immediate view in a nook between the window and a bookshelf, there was no way you would even look in his direction. Even if he was wearing an awfully vivid shade of sapphire blue. And showing a lot more skin and very little button than usual. 

Now he was glad for that. As long as he could get your attention though. 

But as he watched you and Xiaojun start moving again, he thought to himself once more that there was no way the two of you weren't an item. 

"Ey! Minghao-ah, hey!" 

Minghao's eyes left your form and smiled as he greeted NCT's Qian Kun, who had found Minghao with his friend Jun—SVT's Jun, not your Jun. Oh god, he really needed to stop referring to Xiaojun as "your Jun". 

"Hey, ge. How are you?" 

"I'm good," he replied, nudging Wen Junhui with the back of his hand. "Me and Jun were about to grab a drink. Wanna come with?" 

The universe was on his side and Minghao had some thanks to give tonight. He nodded, perhaps too eagerly because Jun narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "Yeah, I'll definitely tag along." 

"Ah, that's the spirit!" 

When Kun went ahead of them to start the journey to the kitchen, Jun murmured into Minghao's ear, "You're not slick, y'know that?" 

Minghao plastered a smile on his face as he waved to Vernon and Chan, who were on the couch setting up Mario Kart. "Who says I'm trying to be?" 

Jun chuckled, shaking his head. "I hope you actually talk to her this time." 

"I do, too." 

The three of them were somehow able to maneuver themselves into the kitchen with minimal problems and stops. Kun made a beeline for Seungcheol and Wonwoo who were seated at the breakfast table with playing cards. Jun clapped Minghao on the shoulder before following after. 

Minghao channeled every ounce of calm that he could muster, then made his way to the island where all of the drinks were set out. But the one thing he hadn't anticipated was... Xiaojun wasn't there. Only you were. 

You were calmly busying yourself with surveying your options, then picking out liquids to carefully pour out into two different cups. It seemed like you were deliberately choosing things to mix together into your own special cocktail. 

Minghao couldn't believe his luck. 

He cleared his throat, plucking a cup from the bag, and heading over toward you. "Any recipe you're going by?" He asked, reaching for the vodka. Jesus, Hao, can you be any more lame? 

Your head perked up at the sound of his voice, and he could have melted on the spot. "Oh, this? Nah, just playing by ear." You paused, reconsidering. "Or I guess, by eye?" There was a half smile sort of expression on your face, and it somehow had the power to make Minghao's heart take flight. 

You nodded to him. "What about you?" 

"Same here; whatever looks good." He traded the vodka for the jug of apple juice. "I'm Minghao, by the way." And my heart's gonna fall out of my chest any second now. 

"Oh, I know," you smiled. "I'm Yn. Do people call you by your frat name or do you go by Hao?" 

Minghao suppressed a grin. "Either one. But my friends call me Hao." 

You took a pair of chopsticks and began stirring one of the drinks. "Okay, cool. Nice to meet you, Hao." 

"Nice to meet you, too, Yn." Finally. "I don't really see you around often. I'd definitely remember someone as pretty as you." He almost cringed; that was so lame. 

But there you were, making him forget everything, because you were giggling. "Yeah? You're not too bad yourself." 

Were his eyes tricking him or did you just glance down at his very exposed chest? Was that blush? God damn—he was not going to last. How were you this cute? 

Minghao took his finished drink and shifted so he leaned one hip against the counter and faced you. He brought the cup up to his lips for a small sip then licked his lips. "I'm guessing you didn't come by yourself since you have two cups." 

"Ah yeah." You brought one of the two up to drink, shrugging when you decided you liked it. "He's gone off somewhere." 

Minghao asked over the rim of his drink cup. "Boyfriend?" 

But before you could answer, there was a loud holler from the kitchen entrance. You and Minghao turned your heads in that direction, only to see that Xiaojun had come back. Right beside him, however, was Dong Sicheng (more commonly referred to as Winwin), your older brother. 

Great. 

"Look who I found!" Xiaojun exclaimed, hurrying over to your side to accept the drink cup from you. "Thank you, Ynnie. Hey ge." The latter was addressed to Minghao, to which he replied in kind.

You hummed in response, idly sipping your drink while Winwin walked up to the island and stopped on Minghao's other side. 

"Hey," Minghao greeted Winwin pleasantly. 

Winwin smiled warmly at him. "Hey." 

It wasn't that Minghao disliked Winwin. Actually, it was the complete opposite. Minghao respected Winwin so much that he feared not living up to his expectations. They were the same age, but Winwin had made a big name for himself on campus for his acting in the theater, as well as his impressive traditional dance training. Minghao dabbled in that realm as well, but preferred more contemporary styles. He just found Winwin intimidating half the time, even though Winwin was very friendly toward him. 

Minghao looked up and made eye contact with Jun across the room. Jun wagged his eyebrows up and down at him, and Minghao deadpanned. Help me, he mouthed. 

Jun snorted, shaking his head. You're doing great, bestie! He mouthed back, then returned his attention to the round of cards he was currently participating in. 

"Gege! Are you DDing?" You suddenly asked, peering around Minghao to look at your brother. 

Winwin wrinkled his nose, gulping his new concoction. "Uh, no. Kun usually DDs." 

"There's no way he'll DD tonight if he's hanging out with them," Minghao mused, inclining his head to the poker table. "He's gonna get sucked into that shit quickly and he probably won't wanna leave the table until dawn." He had personal experience with that one. Wonwoo was impenetrable. Jihoon was even worse; they should feel lucky he was somewhere else tonight. 

"I'm already drinking," Winwin shrugged, his comment directed at you. 

Xiaojun nudged you with his elbow. "We'll just find Renjun somewhere and get him to stay sober." 

"True," you agreed. 

Xiaojun was grabbing your wrist and hauling you away faster than Minghao could grapple with an idea to keep you to stay. "C'mon, I saw Jieun just down the hall earlier!" 

Your groan echoed in his ears as you left, but as you did, you glanced over your shoulder and sent Minghao a small wave. The corner of his lip quirked upward as he lifted his hand to wave back. And then you were gone. Not even a five minute conversation. 

Beside him, Winwin swirled the liquid around in his cup. "They're so weird sometimes. But at least I can count on Xiaojun to repel all the cretins at these events." 

Minghao raised his brows. "Are they dating?" 

To Minghao's utter disappointment, Winwin shrugged. "Beats me. They never give me a straight answer." He smirked in a sort of laugh, eyes flitting over to Minghao. "Isn't that weird, that I don't even know my baby sister's relationship status? They look like a couple, don't they?" 

"Definitely." He tried to not linger on that too much. 

"Yeah, well." Winwin sighed, sipping his drink once more. "I dunno about..." He paused, suddenly deciding against it, "Ah, never mind." 

On the outside, Minghao was calmly finishing off his drink. But inwardly, he clung to every word Winwin said. "You don't know about what?" Does he approve of them? 

Winwin chuckled, waving his hand around. "Aish, I just don't know." He bit his lip. "They don't seem quite right. What do you think?" 

Minghao's heart was currently a competitor in a Formula 1 race. "I guess I haven't seen enough of them to figure it out. Yn seems happy." 

"Well, that's because they're best friends." Winwin dunked back the rest of his drink. "Poker sounds kind of good right now. I'll see you around?" 

"Definitely. See you, Winwin." 

Winwin saluted. "See you, Hao." 

Minghao leaned his back against the counter again and shut his eyes. That was more nerve wracking than he wanted it to be. But he seemed to get a few things out of that conversation... Though there was one thing that stuck out the most to him: if Sicheng didn't approve of your best friend dating you, then what would he think of Minghao?

a/n: man, if only they knew huh :/

« prev · m.list · next »

permanent taglist: @tayunji @im-a-big-mess @staysstrays @y3jiishot @crazywittysassy @seomisaho @stopeatread @enhacolor @yedammi @rnjfy @jaehunny1428 @mythicalamphitrite @ana-is-losing-her-mind @super-btstrash-posts @otchae @luv4vernon @ashxxkook

taglist: @cosmicallyfaye @vortex-detected @lilactangerine @ihrtadri @justasoftstan @tyongf-sunflower99

send an ask or comment to be added! (not making a form this time cuz it's short)

[lesbianrobin]

do you have cal kestis fic recs??? please 🥺

YES oh my god yes. warning these skew kinda whump-y because unfortunately for cal his life is kinda insanely traumatic and i like when people explore that.

so anyway two of my favorites are actually by the same author, sauntering-down.

derelict (36k words) is about young cal on bracca tagging along to scrap his own escape pod in order to hide any evidence of a jedi having survived. it's a really sad yet engaging look at cal at an interesting point in his life, when he's only just established himself on bracca and he's still adjusting and figuring out who he is and how to survive in this new life while mourning his old one. it also explores his relationship with prauf and gives prauf some backstory of his own which is cool!

all some children do is work (61k words) is my FAVORITE and it also puts cal through the fucking WRINGER. it's half exploration of his life as a young padawan, half sickfic onboard the mantis on the trip from dathomir to ilum, and every bit of it is purposefully and cleverly written. it's also like unexpectedly hilarious for a fic where cal is like either like a child soldier or nearly dying of pneumonia the whole time. i feel like i'm not selling this but just give it a chance i beg it's so good.

sauntering-down has some other good cal fics so check them out but it seemed silly of me to just keep reccing the same person over and over, so! on the others.

greezy advice by breakfasttea (14k words) is a lovely fic from greez's perspective that takes place after fallen order as cal is recovering from everything. very much team as family and i love it.

wasted, also by breakfasttea (8k words), is cal telling greez about the times he's gotten drunk before. very sweet and silly and the vibes are quite comforting. breakfasttea has so many good cal fics check them all out!

and if you're a fan of other star wars media, particularly the prequels and/or clone wars, suspicious minds by domada (56k words) might be up your alley. it's an au where young cal's psychometry gives him a peek into anakin's Activities on tatooine and anakin takes drastic measures to avoid getting snitched on by a little kid, which eventually takes the whole galaxy in a different direction. it can be a bit dark but it's really well-written and i haven't read anything else remotely like it.

obviously these aren't all of the cal fics i like but they're some of my favorites and some of the more like. substantial ones yknow like longer ones. anyway i hope u enjoy!!

[justanapplenothinghere]

READ PLEASE!! SPREAD THIS AROUND!!

Hello, today this is usually different from what I post on here but I felt like this issue needs to be addressed.

As you know..there is a recent issue that has happened today, specifically two issues.

The blog below you may have seen a few recent times or so when scrolling.

But when we look at the intro, right it clearly states this here:

Which is fine when read at first but when I consider when my JOKE art was reblogged as this a few days ago:

CLARIFYING IN MY POST THAT IT'S A JOKE IN THE FIRST PLACE! So bare that in mind..that I am a MINOR and with getting comments like that from people with no indication of what tone they mean by saying that. But obviously if you don't have any tone tags, I will assume it as being serious. It would've been fine it was /j or /hj at the end but as you can see by the evidence there is none. Even my friend said for me how they feel uncomfy with those types of comments. And that is understandable.

Further more to prove my point across..since it states No NSFW but mentions of it are supposedly okay and yet they comment that on the reblog with unclear tone so of course I'm going to take it seriously.

Second issue, I have is that they use my PLATONIC FRIEND'S art on C.ai without permission from my friend in the first place.I even asked my friend if they asked them or even at least credited them and here they say this:

Which come on! It's literally not that hard to credit people! Like even I use my friend's art with permission of course and I credit them.

EVEN ON TUMBLR OR ANY SOCIAL MEDIA.

And when I even reblog their post kindly asking them to remove the art on Character.ai they used and clearly stated that they're stealing my friend's art if they don't even credit them. They just ignore my comment NOT EVEN INTERACTING AND SAYING "Oh hey i'm really sorry about this! Here let me do that now." JUST STRAIGHT UP IGNORING IT. IT'S NOT RIGHT FOR ANYONE'S ART TO BE USED WITHOUT PERMISSION FIRST! AT ALL! AND EVEN IF YOU CLEARLY DON'T KNOW WHERE THE ART IS FROM OR BY WHO YOU SHOULD AT LEAST SAY "OH HEY I DON'T KNOW WHO THIS IS BY BUT IT'S NOT MY ART!" IT JUST ANNOYS ME AND MANY ARTISTS WHEN THAT HAPPENS! But here you can clearly see that's not the case. They clearly DO KNOW where they got the artwork from but just go out of their way to not credit them

Thank you to those who read all this and I'm extreamly sorry for posting this post in such a personal way but I just wanted to get my point across, but by no means DO NOT HARASS THIS PERSON!! AT ALL!!

So thank you this is Applin signing off.

God I need a coffee after all this.

[inchidentally]

ouuhh that's not…

I swear I read it three times and looked through their blog hoping they were joking alfhaslfkh nope

BUT I do not want anyone to engage with this so I'm hiding the link - not just because it's ridiculous but because the best way to confine rpf ship drama is to leave it alone. (edit: so I lied abt this asofgsalfga I did reply to one person but only bc they put it in the main tags) I don't rly like blocking but I also don't want to have to create a million filtered tagged posts on my dash - and tbh I don't think anyone I've blocked will care anyway. this way I can still see carlando content for fun but none of the fandom nonsense.

I'm mostly posting this bc up til now I rly wanted to set aside the behavior of the fandom to continue enjoying carlando content but I just can't be bothered anymore. between the larrying and the rampant, disgusting casual misogyny - and ofc the competing with which friendship or fake ship blorbo 1 and 2 are "happier" with asgfjsalfglja. and it's not just this latest thing I get sent tweets and posts abt whole agendas to "prove" that Lando isn't "happy" with Oscar/Martin/insert man who is currently considered threatening to their concepts of Lando's relationships. some ppl even friendzone Max F and Lando and pretend Carlos means more to Lando than him so there's no limits to the insanity.

so for me atp there just isn't enough about carlando to make it worth constantly being reminded that the way too many of it's fans truly believe that these are two men are either as close to each other as they are to their real, acknowledged close friends and/or in a secret gay relationship, that their girlfriend(s) are cold-hearted PR plants/escorts rigged by an evil all-controlling PR department and once the blorbos are freed of homophobic forces (oh god Carlos' old tweets tiktokboom) they can finally have the kind of toxic heteronormative version of a queer relationship that is right with the universe.

like, rpf is only meant to be for fun and more important it is meant to be kept away from anyone involved/the general public !! but when ppl's delu results in the actual women these men choose as their partners being at best aggressively cropped out of pictures and videos* and at worst stalked, harassed, their families and employers harassed, abuse and slander left in comments sections on popular social media and team pages - yea carlando laughing together sometimes and slowed down bro hugging isn't enough lol

it’s also slightly the fact that if you picked a bunch of Lando’s reactions to Carlos and Daniel and no one knew context clues then no one would be able to tell which one he’s reacting to. Carlos/Daniel teases Lando, Lando shriek laughs and goes red, James Corden style gay innuendo, slightly tense undercurrent of men wanting to one up each other with jokes, iterations of bromance that are half sincere and half for the cameras, hashtag hashtag. Lando goes to Daniel's ranch on a whim, dando is special. Lando goes to Carlos' sister's huge society wedding, carlando is special. Lando's family likes Lando which makes carlando special. Lando and Daniel share mutual friends outside of racing which makes dando special. like, it's the same dynamic just rotated around at different times. I enjoy both ships to a certain degree but I'm kind of mystified at ppl choosing to see them as super deep and meaningful and worth fighting over.

side note g o d do I fully embrace that ppl who do these ship competitions and larrying nonsense have ZERO interest in landoscar bc we love Lily and support Lando in his many probable conquests - and bc the Lando and Oscar dynamic isn't a big bromance for the cameras and has no fake gay for fangirl consumption.

like yes pls absolutely consider landoscar inferior to carlando if it means they stay away from inventing conspiracy theories and saying they "just have a bad feeling" about Lily and start attributing everything Lando has achieved to his teammate instead of himself.

also I could be SO incredibly mean using charlos vs carlando and the difference between PR and the public trying to tear one apart but it persisting vs PR and the public being a major factor in the other persisting at all. or the fact that charlos does everything ppl want carlando to do. but there's no point spending more time on people who think that two adult men - who've both said they're as much rivals as friends and the bromance is more what the public sees - are laughing in metrically different and lesser degrees of happiness with their new teammates vs a former teammate.

like, as long as I can now not be exposed to those opinions then they have a perfect right to express them. god knows I'm not saying my blogs is worth a damn but at least I don't trash anyone's gf or try to stunt on other rpf ships for no reason

tl;dr I'm p much done trying to make carlando worthwhile for me to rb or post about. I enjoy seeing it on my dash for myself but that's it! no one will be affected by this change lafhlsahf

*I know there are a few ppl out there who do this bc they have a no-private life policy on their blogs and that's np. they aren't die hard carlando fans tho.

[goodluckclove]

WIP Tag Game!

Whoa tagged again by the brilliant @ivaspinoza! Check her out if you're down for what I imagine to be some intense bloodsucking existentialism!

I'll do this for all of Songbird Elegies as a whole. I'm on book two right now - Blind Trust comes out June 20th!

Read below to hear some things about the origins of the series that I haven't actually said yet and probably won't say again.

1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?

Funny story! I hadn't written anything tangible for months since leaving my terrible copyrighting job. I was absolutely miserable. I ended up leaving my second job because of a medication problem and spent a week in bed detoxing off of Seroquel withdrawal - bad bad don't do that if you can help it. After that I fell into recovery and just had no idea what to do with my days.

The turning point was when I sent an email going fully no-contact with my across-the-board abusive parents. They did some awful things across the course of my life and I'm still spending a good chunk of time making up for their ridiculous medical neglect. I might need throat surgery because of them. Not great! But anyways, I sent that email and wrote the first 15 pages of Blind Trust later that day, sitting on the floor while my wife took a nap on the couch. It just came out. Wife said they liked it so I just kept going.

Three months and two data losses later and the first draft was done!

2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?

I have so many Songbird Elegy playlists oh my God. It's hard to say, and the answer will change, but right now it's "Love Me, Normally" by Will Wood.

3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?

They're all very important to me for different reasons. Scott is the one I tend to talk about the most because he captures a lot of mania and upbeat romanticism, qualities of myself that I value despite the obvious faults. Edgar is just as important, but they represent a lot of my current struggles and I'm doing a lot of healing and processing through them which is good but less - you know - fun?

Tenzin reminds me of my wife with her quiet stoicism. Katy reminds me of my older sister and everything she sacrificed to keep me and my siblings alive. She's more of a mother to me than my own mother. My sister is actually the first person to finish Blind Trust after I finished it.

4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?

Disco Elysium maybe? Griffin and Sabine - has anyone else read that? The Witcher, but specifically the novels? Requiem for a Dream for later books. Tales of the City in terms of tone and character focus. Fleet Foxes and Hoizer and early Decemberists?

Good, warm soup. If you like a bowl of good, warm soup, you will enjoy Songbird Elegies.

5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?

Definitely Edgar's arc. Their experience with their metaphorical (or are they??) inner child and the abuse they've been working to escape and recover from has been hard to look at directly. Especially once I introduced Scott's mother, who's turned into a weird mix of the maternal figure I wish I had and the one I feel I could've been if I chose that path.

Yesterday I found myself writing how I wish it went when my wife met my parents, through Scott and Edgar meeting Scott's mom. The sharing of parental pride and affection despite potential embarrassment. It's a cute scene, but there's a lot of grief in there for me. I wonder if it'll show.

6. Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

Wilford Brimley is Katy's pet Persian cat. He is old and weird and a little fucked up. I had to edit his introduction in Blind Trust because it was six (small) paragraphs and Wife told me that was unreasonable (skill issue), but I can include some canon info:

He shoves his paw under the bathroom door while people are in the bathroom

He likes feet

Edgar sometimes shares little bits of cheese with him

Once he fell asleep in Edgar's lap but then peed in his lap and just kept sleeping in the piss

Edgar treat him like a weird cousin he has to make conversation with during holidays

Wilford thinks he's his brother and an equally fucked up cat

7. How do your characters get around? (ex: trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.)

Cars mostly! Edgar has a shitty used car that's always close to breaking down. Katy has a newer car that's still used, but she takes very good care of it - I think it's a Fiat. I think Tenzin probably uses the car Scott's Dad left behind after he died, which is a vintage Cadillac convertible that Scott's Mom fixed up.

Scott is the only one without a license since he essentially has a magical dissociative disorder and hasn't yet felt safe behind the wheel. In Blind Trust he's taken every form of public transit to cross the country. I think when he was younger he used to skateboard to get around Bluerose.

8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?

I'm close to 40k into book two!

9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?

I have hopes that people will enjoy the tenderness of it. I'm like a reverse-whump ace writer, in that I've written a series that's aggressively pro-comfort and recovery. People start off in pretty sorry states and then make the difficult effort to put themselves and each other back together.

There's explicit ace representation in Scott and aroace rep in Katy (she doesn't know it yet though shhh). Edgar comes out as Agender and changes pronouns midway into the series, but still keeps presenting as androgynous/masc leaning. There's diversity in body types and gender identities in a way that feels warranted to me - Scott has Klinefelter's and grew up taking T, and he made a best friend that came out so she could take her E with him. Same goes with disabilities in prominent characters, though the main four focus on what I have personal experience in.

As a disabled queer writer I hope to make a series that tells a fantastical story about people like me that doesn't pander specifically to my market.

10. What are your hopes for your wip?

I hope people read it. I hope they like it. It'd be cool if I could talk to people about it. I've been pretty deep in the Songbird Elegy fandom for some time now haha.

On a more serious note I hope there's a market for non-sexualized romances that are still hyper intimate. I know I'm into it but I'm still not sure if other people are. I'd like to create more media about positive and fulfilling ace relationships, both romantic and platonic. I'm tired of people seeing that type of life as a loss. Any healthy companionship is not a loss.

I want people to read Songbird Elegies and think about the love in their lives and in themselves. All of it, in every way. Yeah.

I tag @ryns-ramblings! I wanna hear about your thing!