#Ok it is tbh it’s just that the characters in my perception of them are just like hanging out

[corviiids]

i loved your answer to the ooc question... penny for your thoughts on the Core of ren and goro? 👉👈🥺

rubbing my little bug hands together i dunno that i can capture all my whole... mental Akeshu Bible... in one post... but here are some notes on what i'd consider one of the most key points for each.

basically the way this works for me is ill have like a central piece of understanding sitting at the core of how i work with a character, and then let instinct guide their dialogue/behaviour from there.

i wrote a thesis again. two in fact. jesus christ

goro - sincerity is mystifying, dangerous, and impossible, but alluring.

can i talk about light yagami for a second. are we all going to be okay with it if i do that. that's going to make this easier for me to explain

i think light yagami and goro akechi have almost nothing in common once we get past the most obvious similarities - the cynicism borne of shattered once-upon-a-time idealism, the willingness to turn to radical action, the bad hair. anyway the difference i want to point out arises from another key similarity which i think only exists on the surface - the "evil underside true self" counterpart to the "pleasant preppy perfect boy" persona. looks the same. but the difference is that light never struggles with that falsehood, and akechi clearly does.

what i mean by that is i think to light, his perfect persona is nothing more than a simple disguise, albeit one he's been wearing a while without knowing why. he doesn't really have a fractured sense of self, because it's clear that the light yagami who is kira is the True self. the light yagami who is just a nice young man is mostly a falsehood to the point light sees him as a character to be played. (ok this is also an oversimplification but go with me for now. okay. that's the basic of it. just accept this for the sake of argument. this aint about him)

goro is very different. i think in the lead-up to the interrogation room, goro understands himself in a similar way, but after the interrogation room that perception is called into question. okay, i think about the interrogation room scene a lot, because i really didn't like goro's behaviour in that scene when i first played it, i thought it was a very cheap and superficial way to reveal his identity as the traitor by making him act as cartoonishly villainous as possible. and tbh i dont want to give atlus too much credit for creating a super nuanced scene there so what im about to propose is probably unintentional. but anyway, i eventually came around to it because i decided that that cartoonish villanousness must be a choice to goro. at that point in time, goro's perception of himself is akin to light's understanding of kira: black mask/shido's assassin/evil motherfucker is "the true goro", and pleasant boy detective prince is nothing but a mask.

and here i would like to bring up a complicating factor which makes light and goro very, very different. light wants to live. he refuses the shinigami eyes because he wants to exist in his new world to rule over it indefinitely. goro's plan on the other hand has a fixed timeline. goro is aware, and tells us in the engine room, that once his public reputation is shattered, he has nothing. goro's plan involves outing shido by outing himself. ergo, goro's plan is to take shido to the top and then torpedo them together, leaving them both with nothing.

what does this mean? light yagami's mask protects kira - light's true self and a man who wants to live. goro akechi's mask serves the black-masked assassin, but the black-masked assassin serves shido, a role which is just as deceptive as the detective prince. which means goro akechi's disguise protects a self that isn't real, either. it feels disingenuous to say that the version of akechi who exists to be shido's attack dog is his true self. so that goofy villainous smile in the interrogation room is, to me, goro convincing himself that that evil face is who he really is, not realising it's another facade he's playing up - but while the prince's audience is the public, the assassin's audience is goro himself. after that whole thing goes down, i think it becomes clearer that that evil face was goro pretending to himself that he's just a straight up villain who doesn't care about anything because that's easier than conceding that you might feel some complicated way about the self-loathing and bitterness you've been nurturing since childhood.

but wait, there's definitely also truth to the black mask. there's no way to deny that the akechi who attacks them in the engine room had a ton of truth to him that the detective prince lacked. but, wait. goro doesn't perfectly keep up the facade with the detective prince, either, because there are definitely times where he's being honest even when he's being the pleasant boy.

okay, where does that leave us? light has one layer of falsehood (light protects kira), but goro has at least two (detective prince protects black mask protects ???) so what the hell is goro hiding? where's the true self? is the version of akechi who showed up in the interrogation room the black mask, or is it shido's assassin? are those two different guys who overlap? does this mean everything the detective prince said is suspect? we don't know which one is true, but we know they're both lying.

okay. why? what's wrong with him? i should get to my actual fucking point maybe?

this is the central thesis of his shadows in palacefic btw. rather than being divided into a relatively clean true/false like light, goro's true self is split between his personae. every time you talk to any version of goro akechi, you're getting some lies but you're also getting some sincerity. i think goro doesnt know who he is because he doesn't see any particular use for having a real self at the end of the day, only masks he can use to achieve his ends.

except you can't actually kill your true self. it sticks around. so the most he can do is fragment it. but the consequence is the shards get stuck in his masks. every time he tries to put on a mask, a shred of truth peeks out. i think goro wants to not exist and not be known, but inside every mask he wears is a true part of him that desperately DOES want to be known, but can't allow it, but wants it, but is scared of it, but wants it, but hates it, but will die if it happens, but wants it.

what you end up with is a really self-contradictory guy where every time he talks, the things he's saying are simultaneously true and false. it's the worst with ren, because he's really interested in ren, but allowing ren to know him is suicide. light's really good at playing the part because he has no investment in the part, it's purely fake, and all his investment is in his true self. but goro is invested in each of his masks, because each of his masks contains part of him for real and there's no unified self to return to at the end of the day. so he struggles way more with the act than light does, because there's a part of him, however small, that really wants to drop the mask. but he can't, because there's nothing behind it, so there's nothing he can do

anyway when i write goro's dialogue and behaviour, it's not just writing a guy lying and playing a part because he needs the cover, it's goro injecting himself into mould after mould after mould and trying to keep a balance of how much he can reveal vs how much he needs to keep close to his chest. this is why he talks so fucking much, it's why his speech mannerisms aren't always perfectly polished, it's why the mask slips so often, it's why he's so cartoonishly evil at times, and it's why while light yagami is a popular guy who has everyone around him perfectly fooled, goro akechi is really only able to appeal to the subset of fans who are keen on his particular celebrity style while other people find him kind of annoying and disingenuous. when im writing akechi in xyz situation, it's a process of working out which mask he's wearing, what he wants to achieve, what he's hiding, how much he can or would slip, and what that slip might look like. i think this is heightened because of his circumstances, but i also think goro would be incredibly guarded and paranoid no matter what his circumstances were (although the murder might decrease a little).

tl;dr: goro akechi tries to do away with his sense of self but only succeeds in splitting it into a hundred million pieces covered in lies, each of which is desperate to be known but shies away with equal desperation

ren - in a distant relationship with the sense of self

idk that thats the right word but basically i think in true persona protag fashion, and as alluded to by beneath the mask / the power of the wild card / etc the relationship between ren's personae and his 'true self' is more complicated and detached than most of the other characters. i dont agree that the protags are true "blank slate" protagonists in the meta sense but i do think ren is a "blank slate" person in-text in that simultaneously he has extremely strong core values and beliefs which are absolutely immovable, and traits which shine through even in his limited speech, but the manifestation of his personality is a lot more malleable than say ryuji's is. ren is very flexible and wears a different mask depending on who he's talking to. i think that requires a level of detachment which manifests as basically centering his companion's character + needs in a given interaction over his own. this doesnt just come through in his dialogue but also in the way he internally reflects on what's happening.

the way this manifests most obviously in how i write him is that my ren (in texts especially but also in dialogue) has a tendency to omit his personal pronoun (in subject position).

that gives him kind of a laid-back vibe. he has a habit of omitting the first part of a sentence entirely.

he adds it back in when he's talking about something more serious, very alert, feeling uncomfortable, etc. it happens a lot when he talks to akechi because he needs to be very switched on during those conversations to keep up.

idk i know that for some people the joy of having a protagonist character is being able to make them into whoever you want them to be - so your ren might be extra flirty for example which i think is a really popular characterisation of him because it's fun and it has some basis in his dialogue, and it's a choice i went with for a while before i started shifting away from it. recently i've been way more interested in trying to reconcile this really strong-willed guy with a clearly rich and rebellious inner life with the quiet slouched character who says like 3 words every conversation and who really never reveals anything about himself. like, imagine he's a real person and not just a blank slate protagonist i can push and pull - how do i make his little mousy 8< self work with the fact that he's an international criminal without adding something on top that isn't already there in him? i think there's a way to do it and i think the way to do that is to have him internalise as much as possible. for everything he says, there are a billion things he doesn't say. that makes it really fucking difficult to actually portray him sometimes because his rich inner life can really only come through if we have access to his inner monologue, and if he's not the pov character we don't, but you know, i love a stupid fucking self imposed challenge. ren amamiya is like laying breadcrumb clues in his dumb ass 3 word dialogue options that im crawling over like weevils with a magnifying glass

but he DOES leave clues! so many of his dialogue options are sarcastic and dry or straight up goofy. so he's funny, he's deadpan, he can be impatient. but if you take that too far in dialogue, it gets overplayed, and he loses his taciturn charm, so you have to pull it back, because he's restrained, not overt. he's quippy, he's not wordy. he's a show-off, but in a self-assured way. he will never indicate in any way that he wants you to look at him. he'll just make sure he's so impressive that you can't look away. if he winks, it's like he's keeping a secret between you, not like he's putting on a show. he delivers one-liners only, not full jokes, and the setup and knockdown has to be in the same breath. if his thoughts can't be condensed into one sentence, two or three max, he doesn't say them, he keeps it to himself. whether his emotions show on his face depend on how well you can read him, and it depends who he's with, it depends how recently he's been joker, it depends if there's some extenuating factor in there that's going to make him crack. ren's more likely to crack if he's standing up for someone else.

his inner monologue is just as interesting to grapple with because my ren is pretty repressed. the more upset he is, the more he distances himself from how he's actually feeling. he's very good at deflecting people and he's also very good at deflecting himself - focus on someone else, focus on the environment around him, focus on some physical sensation, don't get too far into his own head, or else

tl;dr: ren handles himself with a mix of internalising and externalising by swallowing down everything he might want to say out loud but outsourcing and distancing from his sense of self to keep himself steady

[quartztwst]

QUARTZ

QUARTZZZZ

HAVE YOU SEEN JADE AND FLOYD'S DREAM YET

jade's one is pure hilarious

but floyd's one tbh is kinda sad; I feel bad for the boy, it's like he's in a nightmare instead of a sweet dream

Yeah I stood up until 7 am going through all of the chapters right before it was published which is my only flex but it's really pathetic HELP

IVE SEEN JADE AND FLOYD'S DREAM LMAOO

Floyd actually made so much more sense since Malleus' shallow perception of a happy ending is "no negative things" which Floyd doesn't really mind or actually wants. He likes being entertained and interesting things so negative things are part of that.

It was really sad but at the same time it was pretty silly since Floyd himself was acting pretty silly and bored. I was expecting Floyd's dream to be a bit more complicated but it was actually something that made much more sense once you put the Malleus magic explanation.

Jade's was pretty funny LMAOOO through the whole time I was thinking "Jeiazu. This is gay." But Jade's funny perception of Azul and Floyd in his dream was really interesting.

And the part where he says "They need me" or something similar to that takes a real good look at Jade's character too. When the Idia collection crew said something about Jade's self-importance and his stubbornness, I wasn't really surprised but at the same time intrigued? His character is genuinely so confusing but it keeps you wanting to learn more (but HE WON'T LET YOU.)

Azul's dream was actually shocking to expect but it makes sense. I was actually hoping for my "Azul with a fish tail" dream to win but UEGRGHSHERH it didn't happen. However, something similar happened with him being in a sports team where everyone adores him.

I know it's Malleus controlling his dream but I can't help but feel that Azul wants that adoration and acceptance deep down. But Azul's feelings are more complex than what Malleus thinks it is and that's why it isn't want Azul actually wants. He doesn't want to be like that and it isn't what he truly strives for. It might be what could've been but it isn't what he wants.

That's why Malleus' "always happy, no negative emotions" ideal of a happy ending is so shallow. And I'm not saying "well malleus is a heartless demon." He means well and it shows. The ideal is wrong but the intention is good. He wants everyone to have a happy ending but it's a bit controlling.. Okay. Not a "bit"..

A lot but he means well ok

And I also heard a lot of people say, "It's so sad that the octotrio don't really dream of eachother...."

I think it makes sense. I don't know about yall. They don't always stay together but I really like them when they do stick together. I mean like.. Floyd literally reminds us that they don't have to stick to eachother every time a character goes "Oh, you don't dream about eachother?"

And the scene where Floyd and Jade let Azul sink down makes even more sense because they say, "Azul can take care of it." That's how much they respect him and believe that he is strong because Azul can handle himself. It's not like they don't care. They do. That's why they fell in with him in his second "happy ending."

They only make up rules so they don't become attached because they claim they are just like co-owners of some business (they are in denial and don't wanna say that they care for eachother because that's cringe to them but they care for eachother.)

Jade and Floyd may act cold but that's because they believe Azul is strong. That's how much their trust is. If he can't handle it, oh well (they literally save him after).

And also it's not like they don't care. They literally yell for Azul when Azul gets pulled in again and try to pull him out. Then some people say "omg they don't actually care."

ARE WE READING THE SAME THING??

Anyways I think thats my thoughts for right now. I'll have to go through the all of the chapters again so I can understand more about them lmao

[maryonaccross]

Ok so this may be weird on my part, but why is it that every time I read a Velaryon(Strong)!Reader, I kinda wait for a scene where Alys is present?

I mean like a good scene, not the usual cringe cliches where OC (and author 😭) vilifies Alys for no reason. To me (Alys' lawyer and 1# stan) it sometimes gets repetitive. They completely ignore the potential this encounter may have.

Because at least in my eyes, especially in the case of a Velaryon(Strong)!Reader x Aemond or even Aegon AU, these two girls are... Literally the same?

Bastards born from a Strong? Hello???? Spouses of Targaryen princes? HELLO?????? Except one has everything and one has nothing because this one had no one to cover her up and protect her. And at the same time, the OC maybe just MAYBE sees Alys as a reflection of what she'd be had people been honest about her from the start, refreshing and haunting at the same time. Am I the only one seeing some angsty ass material with this?

No conflict. None that regards Aemond and brutalizing each other for him, at least.

You’re so rightttt. There’s so much missed potential there. The OC interacting with Alys would be such a great way to explore the Strong OCs perception of self and how they feel about the imposter role their mother put them if the writers had the guts to write an OC that actually has critical thinking and doesn’t simply accept every one of Rhaenyra beliefs. The Alys/ Strong OC clash and how effective it could be in a fic reminds me of Sejanus having to mentor the tribute from his own district in tbosbas and how much guilt that evoked in him because they’re both district people but he was spared that life because of his fathers money.

Tbh I don’t read a lot of Aemond/Strong OC fics because in a lot of cases the OC is more or less a female version of Lucerys (either she took his eye out or she was there cheering it on) which is a dealbreaker for me because these fics usually heavily imply that Aemond literally loosing an eye is something he should get over and forget about which is just… insane.

And if the OC isn’t some form of Lucerys’ character she’s so team black that it makes the reading experience very boring because girl will literally never question the role her family is playing in creating a succession crisis. It’s very much giving ‘I don’t care about politics because I’m so privileged that I never had to care’ which I see enough of in real life to want to read a fic about.

[ireneksstuff]

Rant below

I'm sorry the fuck did WE do???

Like I think this whole thing started mainly with crows being mad ab the fucking eyeball lore rp, and some of them literally overstepping tubbos boundaries, being borderline ableist, and then accusing him of spreading homophobic rhetoric (and I'm not just referring to that ONE person, that post had like 15 reblogs with people agreeing with them and a lot more likes)

And when we rightfully called them out, they all doubled down until their OWN streamer called them out (bc tubbo addressing it did nothing)

And then sunny happened. Sunny had been expecting good things from phil and tallulah and chayanne bc tubbo spoke very highly of them. And even if it wasn't for tallulah s distrust, which I can write a thesis about tbh(since I think it's unfair to expect sunny to be ok with people disliking her for where she was from) Phil's language was insensitive towards a very traumatized kid that he had not build a stable relationship with. That's a fact. He didn't talk to empanada like that, so why did he towards sunny?

Yes, he did not mean to do that. But the Tubblings used it as an opportunity to have an angst moment. And crows fucking LOST IT. Like no we do not hate Phil guys.We love that old man. We can still make angsty theories with his interactions with sunny.

ALSO, when it was PHILS turn to take lore srsl, he acted the same way he did always due to not realising the gravity of tubbos' death. And that is not a bad thing. But when the Tubblings, instead of getting upset ab him not participating seriously in the lore,we chose to add it into the story, crows were all over it with meta reasons for why we shouldn't do that.

Like do you want serious lore or not? Pick one

I'm not here to pick a fight. Many tubblings have also gone to crows blogs and have sent hate and death threats which are NOT acceptable no matter what.

I'm just trying to point out that the pure hypocrisy that some crows have shown has made tubblings be fed up with this bs. Cause we expect the hate now.

Again we love phil. I was a crow first and i know thats the same for many of us.

However, EVERY time that he interacts with tubbo or when bolas are mentioned, I just feel the exhaustion of preparing for the disaster that my feed will be, due to like 3 crows starting shit, and then tubblings defending themselves.

I'm not kidding. Every tubbling was ready for war on twt when they did the prank, and we were relieved that at least we had the doozers with, so we wouldn't face this shit again on our own.

I am tired of this shit. I love hanging around in Phil's chat when he's playing qsmp. But when I read chat messages like these, I'm just angry? Disappointed that this is still happening? Like you can claim that we are toxic all you want, but so far, every time our communities have been at each others throats its been the crows picking the fights(and no making angsty hc ab the possible perception of a characters behavior does not count, it's normal fandom behavior)

Even while writing this, I had to check my language like 10 times to make sure I didn't piss people off for no reason.

Whether you like it or not, the toxicity didn't start with us

[andro-dino]

Fuck it we ball here’s a very long, unfinished shogun steel ramble I’ve had sitting in my drafts for like a year and a half (probably more tbh but idk I have no perception of time). I hadn’t reread this in ages before the other day but yk what this banged I love loving shogun steel so I’m gonna share this 🔥

I’ve got a big ol rant abt my ideas of the shogun steel characters and their comparisons to the original cast and how their specifically different and how that feeds my headcanons for them oooohohoooohoh

The way I interpret it, I like to think that the characters in shogun steel are a little younger than where the main cast started and juuuuust before where they were in fusion skill-wise. Like, most of the characters in fusion are introduced right off the bat as already being incredibly skilled bladers and they only get more and more insanely strong as the series progresses. When it comes to shogun steel, I like to think that they even though they are strong, they’re not quite where the original cast started yet. That’s something that I find very charming about them. It’s clear that they’re still young and a little rough around the edges, but they’re all so deeply impassioned to surpass those who came before them that that fire inside them burns tenfold and they work even harder to refine themselves and hone their skills and grow and change even more and I really like that. A lot of shogun steel characters very obviously parallel earlier characters (i.e. Zyro and Gingka, Sakyo and Ryuga) but what I like about them is that even though they play similar narrative roles and have those connections drawn, they make a point to make them distinctly different. I like that the shogun steel cast really feel like they’re learning and growing and not just that they’re the replacements for the og characters but that they’re learning to be better than they were. They’re not quite the legends they’re looking to surpass yet, but they really make you feel like they’re gonna get there.

Now, I like looking at this not only from a skill angle, but also from how they are as people. I’ve joked about it before but I really do quite enjoy that my silly little self-indulgent hc for these guys is just “they’re communicative and they work to support each other and talk through their issues and they love each other and show that in healthy ways.” Obviously, the shortness of shogun steel doesn’t give the characters a lot of time to go through extremely fleshed out character arcs, but those arcs exist nonetheless. I know it’s just a pacing issue but I like how these kids are able to pinpoint their issues and work on solving them and figuring it out. A whole bunch of them (Shinobu, Kite, and Sakyo mostly, just to name a few) go through their own little “edgy angsty teenager who doesn’t need anyone or any help” moments, but they are SO quickly ripped out of them by their friends just being like “NO. WE LOVE YOU AND WE’RE HERE FOR YOU AND YOU DESERVE SUPPORT” and they’re like “oh fuck fr? I mean yeah ok makes sense sorry for being an ass” AND ITS THE GREATEST. THEY ACKNOWLEDGE THEIR ISSUES AND THEY WORK THROUGH THEM AND GROW STRONGER AND CLOSER BECAUSE OF IT. They’re angsty kids and they’re messy and rough but work to become kinder and more supportive people and it’s so nice to think abt. I KNOW THIS CAN BE APPLIED TO EARLIER CHARACTERS BUT LISTEN. IT JUST FEELS DIFFERENT TO ME.

Outside of canon, it just brings me a lot of comfort to think about them finding different coping mechanisms and communicating their struggles and boundaries with each other and striving to support one another and just being human. It’s nice to think about these fucking kids just living and learning and doing it all together and coming out closer and stronger because of it.

I love thinking about them being affectionate with each other too. They always so openly voice their support for each other and feel such protectiveness and pride over each other. They have healthy banter but so clearly love and care for each other. I like to think of them all as each other’s hype men. They feel like the type of friend group where if one of them wanted to show something off, all of the others would be totally hyping

-

And that’s where the draft ended. I’m not gonna continue it but you can kinda figure where my train of thought was going for the most part at the end there. In conclusion I love shogun steel amen and happy new year

[crguang]

ok honestly im kinda done w genshin atp, like the story is okay, the whitewashing tho is pissing me off tho, um idk, i like the game play, and also i gotta get to sneznaya or wtv when that comes out. and did u just not like the sumeru characters bc more of them are men.../j i still dont have yelan or arle very sad...they're like top 10 genshin characters for me, i was too broke to pull for them when they were running

ALSO that's not what i meant abt natasha, like as a character shes good and i like her, and her story is good, i dont dislike her, what i meant is that i cant be attracted to her, like idk...bc all the stuff u listed i should like her, so like idk. i dont skip story, i did her sq, so maybe it is just the fact that shes a doctor, like that was how she was presented at first and i just cant look past it ok... my mom was a doctor so i just cant...my mommy issues strike again, and i just dont rlly like doctors in general havent had good experiences w them before, so i cant be attracted to one...idk, like ik shes like way more than that. and i did get a few adds for her so its prob that as well that kind messed with my perception of her at the beginning, the only hsr adds i every got continously was kafkas trailer.

tbh i shouldve realized i liked women when i saw kafka dragging her fingers across a wall wish i was that wall with like her voice in the background and that was what made me decide to play the game. they know what they're doing...

speaking of which i got her other two messages, shes ridiculous, like i cant believe she can just go to a movie theater like that, and her checking up on you...i did scream. shes pathetic... honestly her being into phycological thrillers makes sm sense, so she was def seeing one of those. and i think shes exposing herself bc of both of the reasons you listed (also like it being on a burner acc incase she gets rejected...i obviously wasnt mean to her tho).

honestly im just shy sat okay...thats why im an anon, but it is funny, since we're all reading ur smut, and thirsting over everyone together.

i did sleep i promise, i dont really like taking medicine, again doctor stuff, but i'll been taking some melatonin bc last night it took be 3 and a half hours to sleep and ive been drinking tea and stuff, but ill be going to sleep after this. wish me luck.

-🌠

i also wanted to last until snezhnaya like i remember a few years ago when the first fatui trailer dropped after inazuma and my entire timeline went crazyyyy, people who didn’t play the game anymore got back into it just for the fatui like they really united everyone… but since the characters and stories dont do anything for me now i personally never feel like playing. and yes i actually was so bored with sumeru because im not interested in men at all dhfjgkgk but also the whitewashing there pissed me off and how they nerfed dehya and made her a horrible standard character was so annoying like i didnt pull for a single sumeru character 😭 arle/yelan is an insane duo, my yelan is great cause shes been my main for years so she doesn’t need anyone but adding arle is just cheating fr. look at my favs beefing (clorinde was there for the friendship points😪)

i thought you disliked nat because you said your friend thought you disliked her bc she was a doctor, but it makes sense if you’ve had bad experiences with healthcare professionals and are reminded of them when you see doctors. personally i love when people who work in healthcare actually care about the patients they have because it’s quite literally life saving and sooo many of them dont give a fuck, that’s why i adore natasha a lot. it’s totally fine if you’re not attracted to her, you don’t have to be!

kafka’s trailer changed my brain chemistry and i can recite it by heart from how often ive watched it. they definitely knew what they were doing especially with these shots like can i please be that guy… i’ll take the bullet too idgaf. AND YES THE MOVIE THEATER SHES SUCH A LOSERRR, THE “my life is an action movie btw lol haha” when the tb says they like action films is so ridiculous. i need to look up her other answers but when she said the action movies lacked immersion i pat myself on the back for writing that she likes psychological thrillers over horror or any other genre like i know her for real… im literally inside her head.

im glad youre sleeping even if it takes a little while!! hopefully your internal clock stops messing woth you and allows you to get some good rest

[callmearcturus]

(Ok, sorry for the second ask, but it wasn't really the same topic so I didn't want to put it in the reblog. Anyway, I hope it doesn't come off too much as paranoid rambling)

People not looking for themes in DR part of a wider trend of people dismissing anything Tom makes out of hand. Of course, McQ is the director and the writer, but the public perception is based on Tom, whether that is right or not.

McQ said that they had always been underdogs, despite how ridiculous it seems that Tom is one given how big he is, but he's right: the public perception of Tom, and the films he makes, works again them being given anything more than a surface reading.

No one got the themes in this movie because no one was looking for them, because it's just a dumb TC flick. It used to be that people confused Tom with his characters, saying that he was just like that, because of course he couldn't act, basically since the og top gun. A very common analysis of MI in the media was that there was no story or character, that it was just all an elaborate metaphor for how great Tom thought he was, despite how little sense that makes.

Since Maverick, I feel like people have been less overtly dicks, but there's still this this undercurrent that there can be no themes because he's not enough of an artist to even think about that. Even now, I feel like part of the accusations of misogyny are in part because people think it's likelier that Tom, and by extension McQ, are misogynistic, than that they told a thematically rich story. And it's not just Ilsa stans, of course: there's very few reviewers or mainstream fans going beyond how fun the stunts are, despite Tom and McQ clamoring for ages that what matters are the characters.

It's not entirely surprising that people who are primarily fan of Ilsa fall into this pattern, but again, what a fucking pity

this is interesting to me bc it totally makes sense but i lack almost all context for it. see, my analytical horsefuckery background is mostly from thinking way too hard about video games and music, not tv or film because I went through a VERY VERY extended period where I would only watch, like, two movies a year. one tv show a year. that's not any kind of exaggeration.

(i'm now watching a lot more stuff like MI has broken a dam in my head, i feel like TC would be proud of that given his whole thing about "pls pls pls watch movies, movie good actually")

so my toolset isn't even coming from film, it's coming from gaymes. it is very sad that people who, presumably, think a lot about films just.... missed? everything MI is doing? it's doing a lot. i'm always a fan of (to be slightly reductive) 'low' art that is saying stuff.

it seems to be part of McQ and TC's methodology to lure ppl in with the promise of spectacle and then go "now while we have you here, we want to talk about the preservation of history in the face of an increasingly digitized culture". which, mad lads. huge fan of that tactic tbh.

[cerealmonster15]

🧃🍦🌸🌸🌸

🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before

HMM. tbh i feel like i say a lot about my personal self here LOL for people that read my tag rambles what i can i say that u dont already know... i feel like the only stuff i omit is like, to keep my identity a SECRET lol ummm.

ok i literally couldnt think of anything JSDKLFJDSKLFJSDKLJ. ask me a question if u want maybe ill share LOL

🍦 ⇢ name three good things about a character you hate

H. HEY. HEY. i dont wanna LOL JKFLDJKFLDS truth be told i dont actually HATE hate many characters. it's usually only ones that are like. token creep characters or REALLY super nasty and i dont WANNA talk about those so im gonna CHEAT and just do what i suspect im baited into doing and talk about a character i. hmm. Used To Strongly Dislike. i was a hater but i dont know that i ever really FULLY hated him. but i def disliked him for a while at first lol

and in terms of twst there are at least four characters this could be describing but i have to do leona bc ive had the most character development with my feelings about him kljsdklfjdsklfjklsdj

he really is so smart and perceptive. it's super interesting when i go back and reread stories and how he's shown to either directly or maybe heavily implied to know/suspect something that's going on far before most of the other characters do. he doesnt always. say anything about it to people 🧍 JKFLSDJFKLDS but it IS cool how you can see he's like, paying attention. he's got experience!

it's kinda sweet when he actually does, sometimes, show his care for the younger students. like in rook's lab coat story when epel accidentally bumps into him, and the npc talking to rook is like OH GOD!!! but rooks like nono, it's okay, leona knows not to just pick a fight with a random student for no reason. <- me calling it sweet when leona doesnt bitch at someone i guess LOL but!!! jfkdsjflds it is. and then in book 6 at the start when everyones getting ROBOT KIDNAPPED, this goes hand in hand with my first point - leona recognized the charon soldiers, clocked that they were dangerous, fighting was futile and risky, and just surrendered himself and told ruggie to not start a fight and to just look after the dorm while he was gone, if he ever came back. i was sooooo grumpy at that scene for so long bc of how COOL he was and i did not like admitting leona was being cool ever LOL JFKLSJDFKLDSJLJ but he was 😔 ive come to terms with it. AND in the jpn server's halloween event playful land, [mild beginning of event spoilers to anyone reading this i guess lol] the fact that he showed up late at night to bring everyone back so they wouldnt get in themselves trouble.... like he SAID it's bc he just didnt wanna get blamed for it later, but like, iirc he aimed his lecture at the ENTIRE GROUP, not just jack who he's dorm responsible for. he showed up early morning/middle of the night to do it too, when hes the king of I Love Sleeping. he probably coulda sent ruggie to do it but it was his turn to be in the event so he came and did it himself;;; dskfjdlsjfk listen i think leona is pretty straightforward and a bitch but i do think he still has some sense of care for people even though he'd rather die than admit it KFJSDKLFJSELJ

this might be cheating but i listed like three separate examples in the prev point so whatever. he's funny when he fights with vil and malleus JKLFJDSKLFJDSLFJ and i like when characters bitch at each other for comedic purposes. that is a positive point in my book i like LAUGHING at my SCREEN

i love when im asked a simple question and use ten thousand words to answer lol

🌸 ⇢ do you have any pets? if you do, post some pictures of them

DOES THAT MEAN THREE IMAGES

[WAHOO!!]

[forgottenvalentina]

The Basics:

MBTI: (take a test here) ESTJ-T (i originally thought of her as ENTJ-T but this is interesting bc honestly i ~do think as ive written her she's evolved!!)

Executives are excellent organizers, unsurpassed at managing things – or people.

Enneagram: (take a test here) Type 3

People of type Three are very ambitious, efficient, and goal-driven. That’s because their personality is built on the belief that you are only valuable if you’re the best at everything you do. They work hard to earn the love and admiration of others. To do that, they have become good at turning off their emotions to get the job done and power through. But sooner or later, they struggle with having a clear picture of who they are apart from their achievements.

The positive can-do attitude of type Three is often tremendously inspiring. Their effortless charm makes them incredibly persuasive. People of this type inspire you to be more, to do more, to dream bigger.

Zodiac: (take a test here) Virgo

The results are in. You’re stable, realistic, and grounded—AKA, a total Earth sign. As a Virgo, you’re humble, hard-working, and extremely caring. You’re the logical, level-headed friend in your circle, and you’re the one everyone knows they can count on.

(ok but the video game question SENT me valentina playing nintendo switch is the most priceless visual -- also im taking all of these as Valentina would and omg so interesting!! she def sees herself as the model citizen i swearrr)

And, for fun, what House would your character be in? 

Hogwarts House? (take a test here) Slytherin (i know...astonishing! heehee)

"Or perhaps in Slytherin you'll make your real friends. Those cunning folks use any means to achieve their ends."

Welcome to Slytherin House. This house pushes you to achieve your full potential. Even though Slytherin gets a bad reputation for producing Dark witches and wizards, all of Slytherins are rotten apples.

Game of Thrones? (take a test here) Tyrell

From what I've been told, y'all are really clever and insightful leaders! With a motto like "growing strong," it's evident that you're a person who is made for battle and life's obstacles. You don't necessarily kill your enemies with vengeance — you kill them with kindness, instead. Now, prepare for war as you face off against the other houses!

(I highkey agree w her being a tyrell!! but not uhhh this vision of it aslkdfjksdf)

Velorum Nocate? (take a test here) Quasar!

(it wouldn't let me view the description, alas! so i did my own, since i know we weren't all in vn:) you walk into every room like god sent you -- because you are a god, just like your holy ancestors before you! house quasar expresses its power through absolute control, and must never be questioned by anyone, but you won't hesitate to show your swift and brutal wrath should anyone prove so idiotic. the galaxy is your birthright, and don't let a damn fool forget it!

(tbh she'd be ~thrilled w this result and she's defff got some strong quasar mindsets like her entitlement, and i did fill this out like she would, but i think she's more of a tark or molec tbqh -- she's got that scheming thing down to a tee!)

Of Dragon Riders? (take a test here) self perception: godiva/moran/barret -- actual fact: arrington/godiva [ here ]

again, i know not everyone was in this rp, so i'll sum it up by saying...you can get a sense of each of these houses by reading through the options listed in the link, but using lfr as our yardstick, id say that being a godiva/arrington is probs closest to being...a varmont probs? they're rival royal houses and mandess runs in the arrington line which prompted the godivas to conquer them and yeah its just a big mess!!

the morans and barrets don't really have a natural comparison i can think of really here, but barret's a military/marcher lord sort of thing and the morans are...scheming, backbiting, powerhungry, and cold alskdjfklsjdfkd

Cowboy, Knight, Fairy, or Angel? (take the test here) Angel! [SCREAM]

[the-knight-of-the-stars]

Mark of Athena, first reading thoughts:

—Forgot to post this again, who knows how long this has been on my notes.

—First, I loved having Annabeth's pov, I missed her as a central character and I loved the development she had here.

—BRO, they are all TOGETHER NOW AND THEY ARE IN A FLYING SHIP HAVING ADVENTURES. This the perfect setup, I would have read a 10 books series of just this.

—I liked so many diferent povs, at first I thought it may become confusing, but far from it, it was fun and so dinamic. I already love all these characters and getting in their heads throught the book was great.

— PERCY AND ANNABETH FINALLY REUNITED. 😭 It was so cute, 10/10

—The Argo II WAS SO COOL. It kind of reminded me of Legends of Tomorrow and I fricking love that show, I wish this dynamic of the seven on the ship lasted forever, I adore that kind of premise. Even the moments when they just weren´t getting along were interesting.

—I felt a vein popping out of my eye with all the Camp Jupiter hunting them down thing, because it was just a misunderstanding, but I do understand why it happend (a little), and it was just so frustraiting.

—All the interactions with Nemesis, Echo and Narcissus were such a trip, jesus.

—God, I fucking love Leo, not only because he is so funny, but because he is so incredibly smart. Is a diffrent kind of smart then Annabeth, wich I really love, they both bring interesting things to the table and is a delight to read.

—Wich is why Leo feeling so left out and like the "seventh wheel" was much more heartbreaking. He makes concernig comments the whole book, but because is just in his head nobody notices. I dont like where this is going...

—As much as I loved all the adventures, I was so stressed out for Nico the whole time, it was driving me insane.

—GJFHUYREGFEU Every single pov is so interesting, this book was GOLD. This is a masterclass in how to make distinctive narrative voices, it was so good.

—The break between Percy and Jason was actually very interesting. I was afraid it would be reduced to petty jelousy (wich it is a little, but I mean, they are teenagers), but there was some nuace there. Like, I felt like it drew interesting parallels of what makes them so opossite despite being the " "liders" " of their camps. It even drives home what makes the roman demigods and the greek demigods diferent.

—Jason being so serius and even cold, and Percy being as hotheaded as he is. Jason not knowing any other life apart from being a soldier vs Percy rejecting that life every chance he gets. Even the diferent perception they both have of the gods because each know a side of them the other doesn´t.

—Their possesed fight was kind of funny tbh.

—I also love having the chance to explore each characters powers with every obstacle, I feel like it was very well used, I never thought, "well, why didnt they used x power."

—"Please, she thought, wondering if her mom, the goddess of love, could hear her. Don’t let it be Jason’s final breath. If love means anything, don’t take him away" Oh, Piper, honey. These kids are legit breaking my heart.

—I really liked the scene of Annabeth and Percy on the stables, it was so sweet.

—I dont know exactly what it is, but I can tell this is a much more curated, experienced writter. And is absolutely fantastic to get so far into the series because I can tell by now Riordan knows these characters so well. They have so many layers, is specially interesting with Percy and Annabeth because we see them grow so much.

—The scene at the aquarium was very creepy and fun.

—Percy developing a fear of drowning was like, so sad.

—Ok Leo, I love you, but dont need to be a bully, come on.

—Jesus, the whole conflict Annabeth had with her mom in this book made me so sad. The way all the gods just use their children (and have been for generations) gets more unberable with each book, I dont respect any of them, these kids just... still try to make them proud and not think ill of them and its so unfair.

—Even the interaction with Aphrodite, I just kept getting angry. I got bad flashbacks from her praising the other two girls in front of Piper and making those weird comments.

—On this one it hits harder and harder that all this kids want is a future, a good life, and they just never get a chance.

—“You dropped this,” he said, totally poker-faced.

Annabeth threw her arms around him. “I love you!” (I died, actually)

—Was not a fan of Hercules´s aproach. Moving on.

— "Percy blinked. “So your brother is a winged horse. But you’re also my half brother, which means all the flying horses in the world are my... You know what? Let’s forget it.”

He’d learned years ago it was better not to dwell too much on who was related to whom on the godly side of things. After Tyson the Cyclops adopted him as a brother, Percy decided that that was

about as far as he wanted to extend the family." - Percy, I love you.

—Wisdom’s daughter walks alone. SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

—The minute Annabeth went on her own I was so nervous, my heart was racing the rest of the book.

—Geez, I wanted to hug her so bad, everything just kept getting worse and worse.

—Gaea is seriusly getting on my nerves.

—There’s too much going on,” he said. “And honestly…before last month, I didn’t even know

when my birthday was. Thalia told me the last time she was at camp.” - That is so fucking sad.

— “What is that?” Jason asked nervously.

Piper slipped her hand into his. “The ghosts are dancing."

Dude! That entire scene of Piper, Percy and Jason and how it ralted with the story of the flood was AMAZING. Easy one of my favorite scenes from the whole saga.

—Rescuing Nico had me so stressed

—"Entertain me, heroes of Olympus." I- Im gonna kill him. I´m gonna kill ALL THE GO-

—Ok, but I liked Percy and Jason coming together and fighting alongside each other.

—Oh my poor Nico, CAN HE GET A BREAKE FOR ONCE

—My girl Annabeth, she is so smart, ahhhhh!

—But Also, WHAT WAS THE NEED TO MAKE HER SUFFER SO MUCH

—Few scenes had me in such a hold and as emotionally invested as the scene when Percy and Annabeth fall to Tartarus. What the Actual Hell. I was speechless for like an hour. The emotion, the tension, the terrible, brilliant moment when everything suddenly conects.

PEAK LITERATURE

— Nemesis wanted him to wreak vengeance on Gaea? Leo would be happy to oblige. He was going to make Gaea sorry she had ever messed with Leo Valdez.

I am filled with dread, and fear, and hype.

[blueiight]

Louis is such an interesting character. He is a hypocrite who contradicts himself. And he is also a character who has a huge capacity for love. This is why I don't understand why some people want Louis to be boring and just have things happen to him. He does bad, selfish things. And that what makes him a great character. He is filled with multitudes.

Facts! u can acknowledge terrible things happen to louis& complicated perception of self even 100 years later and recognize what he is in full. fans r so comically racist toward rl black ppl that a fictional character being black does impede their perception of them [whether its undue criticism of his arc, ‘mutual abuse’ madness, or tryhard martyrdom cuz u think black ppl r obligated to be perfect paragons of morality n not people.] we can acknowledge the moral complexities louis poses w/o denying anything he went thru. as my fav saying is here, two or more things can coexist. louis is the one dearly beloved by the vampire world & his victims, an indiscriminate killer, though too weak to risk the death of the victim in his arms like armand said.. hes a deadly & romantic vampire bc of his hypocrisy, his struggle to seek absolution n love draws lestat and armand to love him so. tbh i couldnt get past the slave shit & what book lewis said bout africans v. african americans v. free blacks in the og interview so i was like mehhhh ok slavemaster pussy move the needle in vampire land ig! but reimagining these lines / scenes w amc louis moved me n amc louis chara arc as we see in the show did an excellent job of showing this!!!. see the positive impact of racebending. i do think getting on him for his family when his family never wouldve accepted him as a human is sooo stupid when the fact that he was pimping out black women to powerful white men in the city as a human & baby vampire n when he lost those businesses due to jim crow begged lestat to turn a dying black teenage girl cuz he wanted to be a mommy so bad is where u can rly get on his ass 🤭

[jack-kellys]

I am predictable do give me Race

i shall give you the guy <3

send me a fandom/ship/character and i’ll say some stuff!!

ok!

How I feel about this character:

honestly i really was rockin with this guy for a long time bc of ralbert 2018 renaissance, then i lost my vibe with him! i didn’t like a fair share of interpretations of him, he was getting almost like too goofy and his relationship with jack i think was sort of. exaggerated in a way that tried to confuse canon with fanon and i wasn’t big on 92sies at the time so i was like. they speak like. 5 times to each other. but NOW? i have figured out a racetrack in my head that i rly like, also uksies happened and i LOVE josh barnett’s sort of return to 92sies race- more hardcore, bruiser type, actually smokes. he’s very cool. if anyones “the blowhard”, it’s him- jack serves this warm parental role, crutchie is this older brother type, and race is very on-the-ground rallying the troops at all times. i like it

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character:

ralbert all the way✊🏼!! what’s funny is if it’s a centered fic it’ll be ralbert but if it’s a background relationship to a diff ship i think i do sprace a lot to appease the masses tbh

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character:

race and crutchie. race crutchie jack. the manhattan trifecta. my god. their group hug when crutchie comes back….. man.

My unpopular opinion about this character:

honestly i wish the peppy jokester perception of him would chill. 92sies was snarky and laid back, livesies was. kind of… bubbly nervous?? and uksies is again the blowhard abrasive type. like for me 92sies and uksies appeals much more to me guys idk i think the fandom just wanted a comic relief character that the show itself doesn’t contextually provide. (because it’s the ensemble. it is the newsies as a whole. that’s. that’s the point they can FILL ANY ROLE-)

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

oh wow idk. i wish crutchie had called for him when the delanceys were dragging his ass to jail, like… idk why he’s calling for elmer yk. that would’ve been a good nod for race’s positionality within the group. OR TBH i wish king of new york was more obviously a ploy for race and like dave to raise the boys’ spirits with katherine!!! like if she was asking dave and race abt where jack was, gave her a quick update on the vibes, she like…shows them the paper before the rest of the boys’ rq and then KONY plays out.

Favorite friendship for this character:

i do like the older boy friendship of the trio (race al and finch). like if i was “missing out” on anything with uksies it’s race and albert not being in sync anymore

thanks claire!!

[satoruhour]

Hey, it's me again. The same anon that ask on how to write longer fic. Thank you for answering my previous question 🙏

1. I feel overwhelmed bc i keep thinking it's necessary to write some extra scene in the fic? Like a silly goofy scene? Plus idk how to arrange the scene to make the fic look better

2. I keep using repeating words and sentences.

3. I use a lot of timeskip, example: first the character is in the office, then second later the character is at the bakery. So i was wondering like it's ok to put them?

So sorry if my words sound weird 🙏😞

no prob anon sorry it took a few days

oh yeah i get that - i would say it's best to keep scenes that are relevant to the theme of the piece? i dont wanna sound too technical but i tend to have a theme / trope when i write and if the paragraph or scene doesn't fit i ideally try not to fit it in.

however everyone likes their own (and other's) writings in different ways so i guarantee there are ppl out there who like to read unrelated lore. tbh i unconsciously do it at times too and it's not a set rule i follow obediently, just a rough outline :)

as for arranging the scenes, as goofy as it sounds i like to read it out to make sure it flows. if something doesn't sound right then i try to pinpoint the problem or move the paragraphs around - sometimes doing that puts the story in a better pace!!

on the topic of repeating words etc, maybe envision how else you want to describe a scene? talk about the surroundings, the feelings the characters are feeling, whether theyve experienced this before or not, people's perceptions of them, ideally make the story as immersive as you can (then again!! diff writers have diff styles, im just suggesting a way to "avoid" using repetition)

timeskips work dont worry!! but i always like to make sure that the reader knows where and when theyre timeskipping to because it can get confusing at times. unless it's something that is meant to be read in between the lines (like the implication of a character having a medical problem and not wanting to tell their partner; the info that they withhold from their partner is also "withheld" in a way from us, that is until it timeskips to them in a hospital etc.)

that's the best eg i could come up w/ at the moment 😭😭 but that's i guess the gist of my tips that can hopefully help you <3 lmk if you need more help!!! 💌

[relaxxattack]

prefacing for maxs followers who dont know who i am but stating this as like. autistic queer person. who also has a lot of other things going on in the brain. i think a lot of autistic n adhd n queer ppl (ESP white auti adhd queer ppl) need to remember that likeee. not everything we relate to . is necessarily an us exclusive experience. and sometimes the thing being judged as 'bad autism rep' or whatever wasnt really.. a character being autistic . not every character whose an outcast or blunt or has problems in social scenarios or behavioral problems is queer or autistic or has adhd and judging a character off of whether theyre good rep for those groups often comes off as. ignorant of experiences outside of autism and queerness n adhd. not to say you cant relate to characters meant to rep a different experience, just that you need to acknowledge that experience and treat it as just as needing of rep as you.

n like it shows up in like. perception of mituna. or isabela from encanto. and ive heard abt white autistic ppl seeing a black character avoiding eye contact w white people as an autism thing. and its like. fuck man not every outcast is autistic or queer or has adhd. brain damage from head trauma is a very real thing and maybe mituna Could be autistic but he isnt bad autism rep just because you (general you) dont want to think about how neurodivergent includes people with head trauma or other disabilities that may cause increased vulgarity and mood swings. isabela Could be a lesbian but that doesnt mean ppl shouldnt also consider how her story isnt like. a lesbian story just because she doesnt like the man shes supposed to get married to its abt how young women get married off n how common it can be in family oriented cultures. avoiding eye contact isnt inherently an autism thing esp when youre a poc and any little thing could be taken as a sign of aggression esp if youre black

n like i get it. when youre queer/autistic/adhd its hard not to try and grab for every little piece of representation you can get. god knows i always take a chance to hc a character i like as a lesbian. ive always been prone to making white characters black. even if a character is clearly nt i will project onto them anyways. but i think the sorts of ppl who will complain abt mituna being bad autism rep often miss the fact that like.

if your projection and desperate need to see and find people like you. gets in the way of showing proper respect to people who Arent like you but face similar issues. then you might need to take a step back and think 'fuck am i overstepping? am i ignoring others need for representation in media in my own pursuit of rep?' . yknow? i think a lot of ppl would have an easier time respecting and learning about other cultures and experiences if they just like. sat down for a bit and thought about the world outside of their own bubble. bc sometimes there gets to a point where it feels like the overall communities i mentioned care more about being listened to than they care about having an actual conversation. and all media really is a conversation. if that makes sense . ok im done now i just have a lot of thoughts abt this.hi max -🎭🎪

yeah this is all pretty interesting and fair actually and tbh id never heard of some of that stuff since im not in that fandom but its an interesting look at this concept

[bearsgrove]

✨ oc tag game wahoooo! ✨

aight so here's the tag game i wasn't tagged in but wanted to do and @gwynbleidd and @graveyaird convinced me that i should 😔 along with u two i tag @werecanidae and @sylkana and anyone else who feels like doing this 🐏

favourite oc - ok thats a very difficult and unfair question, i love all of them so so much, they all mean a lot to me for different reas– ravell. its a toss between ravell and kaz tbh but. ravell. ravell means Everything to me.

newest oc - probably avery? whom i dont talk about a whole lot because they are from the [redacted] Duology 🙃. if we consider an oc from 2 and a half years ago new lmao. listen, i havent been making new ocs much, i just had a period of time when i made a bunch. so avery is a very rare exception of a new oc. im honestly surprised she sort of.. stuck around and i genuinely love her a lot. she was made out of the need to play as a new h*wke because ive been playing as the same one since the dawn of time. she gave my game experience a much needed fresh air and some nuance too.

oldest oc - ravell. or the version of. ravell in sk/rim was very much based on an already existing original character and those two characters still somehow intertwine to this day. there are subtle differences but they are more or less the same person. but when it comes to ocs i talked about on here, which are usually just ocs for this or that game, excluding any original story ones then yeah its ravell.

meanest oc - lyrhis? i know i still present her on here as a dos2 oc but she is an original story oc and i only put her in dos2 because 1) it felt like it would fit her 2) she is important to me and i wanted to be able to still talk about her on here without feeling like she doesnt fit in because she isnt from a game lol. i think her being "mean" is more about her being generally very otherwordly, inhuman and therefore aloof - which can get interpreted as mean i guess - because her perception of things is very different. calling her "mean" even feels weird because that word implies this sort of.. human meanness, spitefulness, generally being malicious for some reason. if anything calling her "mean" is maybe an understatement. she is just kinda cold-blooded, cruel, ruthless. ok you know who is actually a mean oc. evan. he is the opposite of what i just said about lyrhis. he isnt cruel or cold-blooded, but he is spiteful, malicious and can cause a lot of harm with only his words and need for revenge or simple spite. i think that to be mean one still has to be human, its a human trait. and he is human, there is a reason for why he is like that. lyrhis isnt human in the first place.

softest - hera 😔 literally my only normal oc. and she spends a lot of time in the sewers, talks to her rats and overall is a bit Odd but. she is the least evil out of my ocs and carries the least amount of baggage lmao. sure she has been through shit but she is the only oc that turned out "fine" after her personal trauma. but other than that she is very compassionate, considerate and has a strong moral code

most aloof/standoffish - well idk. its a toss between lyrhis i guess for reasons i already mentioned and then wren. which is quite a difference lmao. those two come to mind first but then also ravell, ives and avery. eh, most of my ocs probably seem standoffish, its one of their most common traits. but in conclusion i would say wren? if only because wren is actually a lot like hera, my other more or less only normal oc with an actual moral code and someone who has other people's interests and feelings in mind. but unlike hera wren outwardly appears very cold and most people would describe them as aloof. they are simply distant and keep to themselves but definitely are not internally aloof, they feel a lot, they simply don't show it. but the aloofness of others (ravell, ives, avery…) definitely comes from a lack of emotional intelligence as well as simply being a reserved bunch in general

dumbest oc - probably ravell :( if we compare their general Knowledge about things with my other ocs they are definitely the dumbest. but they are not Stupid. i think them being dumb can just be summed up into them not Knowing many Things and acting/speaking without thinking. they dont do much thinking. which can lead to them making mistakes because they most often act on impulse. they are rational, they can be very smart and cunning, but also they do strike me as the dumbest of my ocs sometimes

smartest oc - hmmm. cant decide between lyrhis, evan, nate and kaz. leaning towards kaz fsr, even though outwardly he would appear as the dumbest out of this group. but i think the other 3 while being smart are also just generally very learned and academically smart. but kaz has that natural smartness about him. idk how to explain my brain power ran out half way into this tag game ngl

horniest - evan.

oc you'd bang - hmmmmm i cant decide between "all of them" and "none of them". like. i know most of them are very hot and right up my alley (i mean I made them) but at the same time. they have way too many similarities with me for me to be able to comfortably say that i would fuck them lmao. i know who i wouldnt tho 100%- ravell. i think over the years they became too much of their own person. like ravell is real to me ok. and i respect them too much as a person to say something like that lol. ok well. i just realized something. i change my statement to "all of my ocs that are women". i figured out why i didnt feel comfortable saying "all of them" lmao. because not all of them identify as women!

oc you'd be best friends with irl - kaz. kaz has unironically been my best friend for as long as i can remember. i think that even when i was making him at the back of my mind i would think "ok who do i need? thats who this character is" and back then i needed a friend! as cringe as it is. one good friend. who would be just my person. and no one else's. ok my abandonment issues are showing again and recently i'm noticing way too many past signs and patterns

[talkaboutthatfilm]

10.05.23~ Wednesday

WHY I LOVE ALMOST FAMOUS (2000) - A Film by Cameron Crowe-

I think it would be most appropriate if I debuted (if you will) talking about one of my favourite films, though that title shouldn’t have a hefty weight to it. I fell in love with this film a while back, in a moment where the soul craved an escape into a 70s rock scene, & it landed in the best place. Last year, I watched this film- & I wish it was an exaggeration- around 50 times. Whenever a pick me up was needed, I sought it out. Why? That’s what I’ll talk about now~

Where to start? The favourite thing is easily the music, all of it just fits into place. It is elevating, & gives you such a good taster for what that era had to offer, especially to someone who might not know a lot about the 70s but wants to learn- the soundtrack is highly recommended. For those of us who already know a bit, it was a nice toasty reminder of the best songs that fit into each mood of the film, & reminded you to just slip those songs back into your playlists. Easily, if the music doesn’t feel like your vibe, I feel like the film kind of slips away a bit, but stick with it! I think there is something highly beautiful about the characters that I’m going to leave you to discover, because tbh, I don’t want to talk about them all. However honourable mention to fringe guy (Ed) who spills his guts on the shaky plane, I got you babe, Sonny & Cher style. Also holy mother of fuck! The amount of just amazing actors in this film…where do I begin? Kate Hudson, Billy Crudup (he is also in another favourite of mine; 20th Century Women- maybe I’ll write about it; we won’t mention Alien Covenant…), Patrick Fugit (love his surname), Anna Paquin (honourable Trick ‘r Treat mention?), Zooey Deschanel (who’s that girl?), Jason Lee (I don’t have to mention his career), Philip Seymour Hoffman, Frances McDormand, bloody Jimmy Fallon, Fairuza Balk, Noah Taylor (submarine man), Rainn Wilson, Eric fucking Stonestreet just showing up outta nowhere, same as Nick Swardson (bowie!!!) & Susan Yeagley (you have a good day) just casually being there for 2 seconds. Ok I’ll stop geeking out for no reason, it’s just exciting!

I think I’m gonna just dive in. This film is special to me because of the way it changed me. I always daydreamed this idea of what I wanted to be like, & then I saw Penny Lane for the first time, & I watched in awe, because she is everything I’ve always wanted to be. & it made me realise that nothing is stopping me, I can be extroverted & talk to people. It doesn’t cost much to open yourself up like that, & to be honest her character isn’t perfect, she is flawed, but in the ways I am, which reminded me to be more gentle with myself, & also it puts everything into perspective. Penny is lonely, she is “surrounded” by people, but in reality none are there for her, she is there for everyone. When it comes to shedding this persona she has crafted, no one wants to hold the girl underneath it all, apart from William, who is the only person who genuinely loves her. She to others is a means of time-passing entertainment, while she?- a young girl who’s influenced, falls in love with everything, she is incredibly perceptive & though she acts tough, she gets heartbroken & falls apart like all girls do at 16, she was a victim of a power-play relationship; we could deepen on that, but at the moment I want it to be surface level, this was the 70s, & it was incredibly common & not spoken of, all hush hush. I think the most heart-breaking scene to me is her birthday scene, this is cut out & in the extended versions, but to sum up: it’s right before the ‘what kind of beer?’ scene, & the façade is coming to an end, everyone is getting ready for the next adventure, & Penny doesn’t know where else to go. She just assumed she’d be with Russel, & as she cuts more cake & asks anyone if they want any more, everyone starts quietening around her; she practically asks a void, then loses her voice, & the dawning reminder that she has to start leaving enters her mind. She half smiles through this whole realisation, but you can see her heart start to crack under it all. She was just a pawn in their game, they knew this, let her think otherwise, & it just reminds me of all those times of suddenly feeling like the place you knew so well wasn’t shaped for you anymore, & you start to outgrown it, or more, it starts to outgrow you, & you lose your footing. I think this scene changed my perception of Penny’s character for me a lot. Initially watching the film I star-gazingly watched her, but as I got older & paid attention to the small moments that valued a lot in her character, I realised her whole act is just that, an act. & there’s a frightened young girl who wants to also be just as loved as this Penny Lane, Lady Goodman, & she is the true person who is only ever shown to William. I do want to mention, I don’t think William or Russel is a fit for Penny, I think, though William’s love is more authentic, he is young, & regardless of if he realises, he won’t benefit her much. I do think he loved her for herself rather than what she could be for him like Russel does, but I think Penny needs someone who isn’t involved in all of that rock n roll life. Last thing to mention with Penny Lane naturally is her clothes, I’ve also purchased an afghan coat that I wear every winter, & it makes me live out my best Penny Lane dreams. But I’ve read a LOT about what the costume designer (Betsy Heimann) has said about how Penny Lane’s clothes were fashioned. & I read a lot about how the coat was more than a coat, it symbolises her ferocity & strength when it’s on, a shell, without it she is wearing not much material, she is bare, & that is the real Lady Goodman underneath it all. However I will say I love that the fur on the coat is actually an Urban Outfitters rug that has been dyed a ton. I wish I could have that coat…one day.

I think we have to talk about William, doy. I think I also relate to him a lot, I also think he & Penny are so much more similar than he realises, because she is living in the world he wants to, but she is just as much an outsider, it’s all about how you present yourselves in those environments. William is playing us, the audience, he goes through the same motions of awe & admiration at this incredible life that happens on the road, it’s jolly & warm in the beginning, he is excited to be a part of something at first, not realising he doesn’t fit in with their views of the world, as Lester Bangs states, he is ‘uncool’, which he feels (we could argue that then means as the audience that we too are uncool spectators of their lives just like him; important to consider that Cameron Crowe wrote the film basically about his life as a rock journalist, so his POV is our POV). What even does ‘cool’ mean to each & every person? Something different, I think it’s not such an argument to make about William’s coolness, but instead to consider what the rock n rollers think cool is, which is themselves, William is a dorky guy who does journalism & carrier a tape recorder around with a notebook glued to his palm. Things to consider guys. Aside from his outside not fitting in (maybe a mullet would fix it?) he also actively stands outside from what they are doing, because he is there to watch them, but you can feel that sense of wanting to be them by the way he looks at them. I think I like William’s character because I also think he goes through the different stages of being with musicians, it’s so cool at first, as Lester Bangs says, ‘they make you feel cool’ & like he is their friend, but he is not. & I appreciate his innocent & honest outlook on all of it, sometimes he kind of seems like the kind of person who is at the wrong place at the wrong time, he just is there as a stepping stone, then gets used up like Penny. I will be honest, I don’t know much to say about William now, maybe because I left it for a bit & came back so my train of thought on William has strayed. But also, he is 15, & so I don’t really know how to judge a character as much when they’re half-baked as people (not half-baked characters- 15 is just so young, you’re so unfinished). I rather just appreciate his views, & that he doesn’t let them corrupt his innocence as much, unless you account the band-aids all sharing the room with him…

I think without a doubt, the best & most overlooked character is Lester Bangs, he says some things that just always light up my perception of everything. He is an incredible character. We don’t know MUCH about him personally, though he is a big music connoisseur, so maybe that really is all he is. But the scene with him in the café with William (lol also at the ‘I don’t have time to sit around & talk to my many fans’), he says something I think, if anything is to be taken from this film, it is this line: ‘be honest & unmerciful’, go headstrong into the world, be soft when the moments call, but if you’re honest & open, then you’re doing something right (with moderation of course). I think so much could be said about this great film, & to be honest cutting it short to this feels unfinished, maybe I’ll add stuff on later as it goes on. But I think it’s something everyone should really watch when they need to be taken away. It’s an easy film to follow, & I think it will mean either too much to some people, or others won’t find it a necessary watch. Whatever floats your boat?

I highly doubt anyone will see this, I am writing to clear my mind which is always so full of words. I watch so many films all the time, & I love to talk about them. Having an open space to just call out into any abyss (which is better I know nothing about where this is going to) feels like conversation enough. I’ll maybe write more, but in reality I just need to push forward & see how I can articulate my words in a better format & way, but for now. Diary entry style should work for me. That’s all. Thanks spooky!

P.S. I am more of an avid horror film fan, but I can be diverse!