#Seta speaks

[setaflow]

Gay pride happens in June and gay wrath happens whenever hbomberguy drops a 3+ hour video essay about a specific topic

[setacin]

thinks about ethoslab and thinks about ethoslab and thinks about ethoslab and thinks about ethoslab and thinks about ethoslab and thinks about etho

[tarmac-rat]

Slowly quietly thinking about how water-- the classical element of change, movement, emotion, and community-- is a subtle symbol of every Cyberpunk 2077's love interest's quest once it reaches it's completion

Judy Alvarez wants to enact change. She is, at her core, an idealist, and wants to confront the injustices of the world she lives in even if she doesn't exactly know where to start. Judy sees the way the world chews up the working classes of Night City and spits them out with no remorse and is one of the only people who says "no, this shouldn't stand, we have to do something". Even though her plan to seize of Clouds is ultimately unsuccessful, she walks away having gained at least one thing: her freedom. She's tied to Night City, in many ways always will be, but she realizes her worth extends beyond the place that's done absolutely nothing for her in return, so she chooses to leave it behind. Judy's storyline ends with her sitting on the dock overlooking the reservoir of Laguna Bend.

River Ward doesn't know how to change. Blue-blooded through and through, an NCPD detective whose traumatic experiences with crime has shaped who he is. River's morality drives his work, but it also pushes those closest to him-- his sister, his niece and nephews-- away from him. As a result, we see him as the thing society shaped him to be: a no-nonsense, by-the-book cop who genuinely believes in the morality of those he works with until he's forced to look it's corruption dead in the eyes. And the second he realizes how unjust the law he fought so hard to uphold really is, he severs his ties with it and returns to the people who care for him the most. River's storyline ends with him sitting on top of a water tower.

Kerry Eurodyne is resistant to change. Why wouldn't he be? Kerry Eurodyne is the last of the old guard, a rockerboy still living 60 years in the past who's in a mansion he hates and in a corporate deal he can't break out of. So what happens when change comes along in the form of a J-Pop band that's covering his songs without his permission? He confronts them, old-school style, because that's what rockerboys like him've always done. But Kerry soon realizes that the world moving on isn't a bad thing-- what is bad is him digging in his heels and not moving along with it. The new ways can be hard to accept, but Kerry's done with spending the rest of his life grappling with a past he refuses to reconcile with, so he ushers in a new era of his life the only way he knows how to: with songs and flames. Kerry's storyline ends with him lying on the shoreline of Del Cornado Bay

Panam Palmer is desperate for her people to change. Stubborn, hardheaded Panam saw the writing on the wall and broke out for a fresh start the moment she realized Saul's 'promised land' was nothing but dust, Raffen, and dealings with Biotechnica. She struck out as a merc in Night City, running drugs and working with the local gangs. But Panam's loyality is as much a blessing as it is a curse. She comes back when her family needs her, but she is done sitting on the sidelines and watching the Aldecaldos fall further under a corporate's thumb. So she does the only thing she feels she can do: steals a panzer and shows her leaders that their clan can still be something great. She's rewarded for her actions, and the Aldecaldos retain their independence for good. Panam's storyline ends with her driving the Basilisk over a lake in the Badlands.

[kitamars]

smokey eyes

(+ alternate version below!)

[love-live-edits]

Karou Moodboard

[supercantaloupe]

la scala di seta overture is on like every audition packet known to man and yet no one ever actually plays the damn thing

[weeb-polls-with-pip]

Autistic Anime Boys Side A Round 1 Match 11

Propaganda:

Yu -

"Like all Persona protags, he hardly canonically speaks. Seems too cool for school but is actually just a cringefail guy who loves his little sis Nanako, likes to fish and make beef stew, and also likes cats. He also solves murders with his friends and forcibly teach people the power of friendship! And to paraphrase one of my mutuals, "I love Yu because he just stands there like •_• and then everyone falls in love with him. Gets accused of dating like every girl he meets, gets teased by every girl on the investigation team, has whatever he has going on with Yosuke. This kid and his autism swag". Oh yeah there was also originally gonna be an option for Yu to romance said Yosuke guy, including the confession dialogue being recorded in both Japanese and English, but it was removed because ALTUS hates gay people </3 But don't worry because there's a mod that adds this option back in because the devil works hard but gay JRPG fans work harder."

Sechs -

"As a teenager his father reveals to him that he's actually not human and then he essentially intellectualizes his own crisis toward that so hard that he talks himself into enacting a doomsday plan to make all life cease to exist so technically nobody will suffer anymore. So he takes two of his fellow wizards both of whom are absolutely infatuated with him (one of which is the closest the BlazBlue series gets to a canon gay man imo), takes a super powerful weapon from his father and in a sort of misunderstanding slash random event ends up killing him, and then the three of them flee the country and start trying to act out his plan. He pretty much just stares at people silently and only talks occasionally, when he does it's usually either a short sentence that is either blunt or vague. His magical attribute is gravity magic idk as someone with vestibular/proprioceptive sensory issues gravity magic is an autistic as hell magic to master in. He also has a funny name. In the joke route he is also written adding a sort of gap moe attribute to his tendency to not talk a lot where he stops talking in any instance where he's thrown off a social script or doesn't know what to say, and in the gatcha spinoff of course because they have to make him at least cooperate with you he tends to read as less overtly evil and more just having low empathy and a strong sense of his form of "justice." There is so much more I could say about him he's one of my favorite characters in the entire BlazBlue extended universe he's just a very cool character both as a villain and a circumstantial ally. Vote for funny guy named sex as a win for autistic emo twinks everywhere."

[azuremliam]

@this-is-fox-speaking Correct! RIP their hair, but ironically Liam's used to it getting all messed up.

Aaaand this isn't the first time mandibles got wrapped around their head honestly (their wasp moms sorta do the same thing when wanting to clean their hair- just ended up making it messier cause its not like seta)

(Liam's attitude to their mom making a mess of their hair is very different from how they react to Scarab doing that lol)

[horizon-verizon]

I would like to ask your opinion on this links, Where is argued that Rhaenyra's reign would never have been stable as long as there was a viable male heir. I think that would be slightly true except that we have Jeyne Arryn right there who yes, she had to lock up some of her cousins ​​(I think) for trying to usurp her and yes, there were conflicts after her death because she chose a successor and some decided not to respect it.

When one of the worst crimes is kinslayer and we see within the universe examples of how it is solved peacefully. I don't understand why everyone jumps to yes, without a doubt murder is the only way.

https://www.tumblr.com/bbygirl-aemond/707496074526523392/what-would-you-think-would-happen-if-the-greens?source=share

I would say that there is a male candidate under her reign who would keep those who wish to destabilize or usurp her hopeful, but the line between hopeful and actually plotting/active in this case is thicker than this person thinks. Yes, with Rhaenyra being female there are always people who will prefer any of her maniac brothers. And yes, Jeyne Arryn had trouble getting her seta having to imprison her own relatives who later stopped her chosen heir from ruling after her death. However, as I and others have already said--several times, really!--how many people actually would do something against her or try versus those who supported her and fought for her and therefore--if she had ruled--would stay behind her? Especially if greens stans and some "neutral" fans realized that it's so much less likely for dragon-less Andal lords to actually seriously harm them with their dragons outnumbering the original 3 conquerors' dragons by more than 10 if the green characters (and I mean Alicent and her kids and father) had left well enough alone.

As for Jeyne Arryn, is it not strange how it is after Rhaenyra dies and loses that another woman-ruler's wishes/authority declines after her death? What would have happened if Rhaenyra had survived and ruled without as much as she went through, how would she have responded to her Arryn cousin's will ignored? The same cousin who--unlike the Rosby and Stokeworth girls who were not blood-related--actively and personally supported her in the war? A woman who ruled her dead mother's homeland, the same house whose' sigil she added to her own wartime banner? And it's important to note that Jeyne Arryn, like Viserys, expressly vocalized/declared who her heir was while Rosby & Stokeworth's fathers did not as far as anyone knows. Finally, it's a lot easier for Rhaenyra to support Jeyne's heir or avenge them because unlike here, w/Rosby & Stokeworth she had the pressure of choosing what would make her immediate supporters happy for her immediate needs. If she had won, that pressure would have been much lighter. So if one argues that Rhaenyra would treat Jeyne Arryn exactly as she did Rosby and Stokeworth, they're not reading through the text. And if this makes Rhaenyra sound self-interested, I never said that she wasn't. In other posts, I explain who I think Rhaenyra was as a person and how she became that (pre-KL and marriages) into her becoming her later paranoid self. But I am speaking not of an individual's morality but of one very important effect of her fall on the politics of greater Westeros. Once again, Rhaenyra's loss and inability to stay as a queen affected noblewomen's ability to justify their places as rulers in their own right, which has implications for what women are able to do versus men's. To downplay that is to ignore the implications for even Daenerys, how Arianne Martell vs Stannis Baratheon use precedents and customs to explain or promote their decisions and bids for positions, etc. It is to ignore how Targ women get weaker and farther from the central seat of royal power until we have Rhaella and Dany--both literally sexually and physically abused by their own brothers. A long way from Alysanne, Visenya, and Rhaenys. It is to say, "patriarchy and thinking women shouldn't politically participate and decide for themselves how they navigate life and get any sort of support from their families/government/etc is actually good, or 'not as bad as you'd think'". Using Rhaenyra's self-centeredness and then exaggerating its quality or effect to make her pre-KL personality into something evil is making a victim a perpetrator before they actually become said perpetrator. As well as a lie. Which ironically tends to actually make perpetrators, pushes them into darker places.

Because textually there is nothing to indicate she performed any truly distinctive or evil act before or after her marriages nor her time at Dragonstone ruling it by herself. The reasons why some at Dragonstone turned against her were because some believed a man should come before a woman, because they thought that they'd gain some benefits or just survive the greens, because they wished to see the person who allowed their relatives to either try to claim a dragon or died during the Battle of the Gullet, or they were like Alfred Broome who felt that she didn't give them as many privileges as another person and for personal greed ("Rhaenyra Overthrown"):

The greed and envy part aligns with the greens' own reasons for usurping Rhaenyra. As for the Sowing by itself, those people chose of their own free will to try to ride a dragon, that's not on Rhaenyra. In the Battle, you could argue that disobeying an overlord would be enough to hate any lord and this is correct and valid except as a way to vilify Rhaenyra out of all the lords and ladies who, for centuries, have also used commonborn people for their wars. Yes, Rhaenyra is a typical aristocrat in that sense, so why should she be singled out for this specific thing? (This is not to those commonborn, but to those readers and in-story green supporters who would try to say Rhaenyra deserved punishment for this. The commonborn, just like with other lords and vassalages, can and often do, resent lords for lost or disabled relatives from war).

We already saw/see how many came out and fought for her, how they outnumbered those who didn't. (Links to a list of her supporters versus him and what he did--EXCEL SHEET; QUOTE#1 /QUOTE#2; A TUMBLR POST). Don't believe me? Check out this wiki page of the official wiki: The Greens vs the Blacks by the end of the war.

To clarify: going by how many supported Rhaenyra in the actual war, we can surmise that she had way more support than she did without. And I mean "support" by those willing to fight for her whether by the value of oath, to help their own claims, belief in her herself, or all of the above. All the while, you have to also realize that Alicent had to have tried spreading the rumors of Rhaenyra's sons' "bastardy" and Rhaenyra's own "licentiousness"--Borros' comments about her being a bitch and Lucerys her "whelp"--as to ruin her and their reputation and get others to turn against her. Didn't work for most people, evidently.

The reason why the Lannisters and Hightowers (the two main and biggest green supporters aside from Borros/the Baratheons) ever thought to rebel and participate in usurping Rhaenyra was that Viserys allowed an in to the Hightowers by marrying one of their most Faithful, conservative members and having 3 male children with her. And the Lannisters (namely Jason and Tyland), while they definitely thought males were better were not as invested in supporting the greens as far as they could capitalize on their win (and for Tyland, safety, as he was in the castle when it all went down). Rhaenyra had already rejected Jason Lannister in the show while Viserys ignored Jason as a potential husband for her in the book/original lore, so the Lannisters chose a different avenue to influence in the royal family and power. They were all so emboldened partially because they had dragonriders on their side: Aemond, Aegon, and even Helaena if they ever made the excuse to put her out there (though I seriously doubt they would) plus the hightowers' resources and influence.

Finally, when we asses why people would not "respect" Rhaenyra's rule or her heirs' vs why sometimes men and their male heirs' are not "respected" throughout "Westerosi" history, there is a clear difference. If we went back to TWoIaF, there are many examples of men and their male heirs usurped or not "respected" and killed because they were physically weak, too young, weakminded, outmatched, unlucky, etc. They were generally never killed because they turned down an offer of marriage that would benefit their spouse more or just because they were women and seen as unfit based on that alone (the first one is a society woman's plight). Meanwhile, women receive more socially sanctioned sexual or turned-up regular violence, or simply those surrounding them decided they'd rather be led by an invited male--even those men who were a past-enemy/conqueror--than have a woman/girl from the past male ruler's direct relation rule in her own right: Agnes Blackwood; Argella Durrandon; those women that Ronard the Bastard "claimed" from those he conquered; Gerold III Lannister's unnamed daughter who married Joffrey Lydden, the first Andal to rule the Rock and like Orys took his wife's name as to continue that lineage but still would overrule her; Arlan III the Storm King offered to have Roderick Blackwwod's daughter/his own good-daughter Shiera to rule with him jointly after his conquest of that part of the Riverlands, but the lords protested and said they'd rather have him than a girl so that he just added these lands to his own Duurandon domains and it ceased to be "Riverland" for a time. One can check out why this happens more often HERE, by mononijikayu. You can't choose when and where history matters and when cultural/societal ideologies matter in how they shape the present.

[profound-bouquetbird]

I am sososo sorry for not posting y'alls requests. But Tumblr seems to have made an update where you dlcant edit asks people send you once you decide to answer them

Soo... I'm opting to just screenshoting the ask and doing requests that way :)

So, let's begin!

---

Lets start off with how you two met

It would have most likely been in the woods. You had been on the run for a couple of months, living wherever you could and changing your location every two to three days

You didn't eat o get caught and tortured, possibly killed. So, you stayed on the low, making sure not to go near any humans or anything that could be a threat

So you could imagine how shocked Tiger was when she saw a hybrid sleeping underneath a tree, covered in leaves and such to blend in with the surroundings

She thought it would be a bright idea to pick you up and take you back to base. She didn't think you would wake up and freak out the moment she seta hand on you

You were kicking and screaming, trying to get away, and Tiger was panicked. She was yelling at you to calm down and that she won't hurt you, but it did not help her situation at all

Her yelling only made your head hurt and your ears ring, now being more desperate to get away. But in your state of panic you just couldn't

Tiger managed to see the problem was her yelling and holding onto you, so she let go of you

You didn't run, only backed up into a tree, breathing heavily and looking at her in fear. Your mind was too all over the place to think of running away

She started to speak in a low tone, her hands up in the air where you could see them. Now telling you calmly that she wasn't going to hurt you

You were slowly calming down, seeing that she wasn't holding any weapons and that she didn't actually have the intention of hurting you. You slowly approached her, examining the Tiger skull that laid on top of her head

She almost squealed in excitement, extending her arms in a welcoming manner. You flinched at the sudden movement, but continued to approach her nonetheless

After the fiasco called 'your first encounter', you two were inseparable

She was always there to help you and fulfill any and all need you had, either that need being for her to reach something from the high shelf or simply for her to play with you. Whatever you needed, she delivered

You stood by her side, following her like a lost puppy everywhere

When say everywhere, I mean everywhere. You once followed her into the shower, but stopped after the horrors of seeing her slowly pulling down her pants while making eye contact with you

You didnt follow her everywhere after that

You two were like the older and younger sister duo, minus the bickering and backtalk that is, since Tiger didn't have the heart to scold you and you didn't know how to fight, neither verbally nor physically

Since you were the first hybrid they had encountered (They had not met Gus yet), you were practically like some sort of mascot

But everyone knew how overprotective Tiger was of you, so they didn't dare to make you do anything that made your face twist even slightly in sadness. They best belive Tiger would be standing menacingly llbehind them

You were ofet happy back at the base. But whenever you had won a game against someone (they let you win), or when you simply got a new gift from someone, you couldn't help but giggle in joy and run around the place like a wild animal

That led you to knocking down a few things, most were non breakable. But the ones that were would immediately make you stop running and turn around to see the damage, you ears lowered from both the sound of the thing breaking and from guilt

Bear would be pissed, but she wouldnt completely lash out on you. After all, you were a kid, kids make mistakes

But she would scold you. You would just stare at the ground in shame as you listened to Bear scolding you whilst you tucked your tail between your legs

Tiger would, of course, feel agitated from bear scolding you and try to ease out the situation. Saying stuff like "It's okay." and "We'll find a replacement."

But Bear still had to teach you some sort of lesson, so she would just tell you to pick up the mess that you made (of course saying that you needed to put on some gloves as to not get cut)

Tiger would feel bad and offer to help, but Bear wouldn't let her, saying that "Just because she's a hybrid does not mean special treatment, she's still a kid, like all of us, giving her special treatment would just prove to her that she's different." which, it was a fair point, but Tiger wasn't having any of it

When Bear was out of sight she would approach you and offer some help, cleaning out the small shards that you couldn't pick up because of the thick gloves

It was another way for you two to bond and to brighter your mood up after Bear had scolded you. So it was a win win situation for the both of you :)

[setaflow]

This movie is going to be a cinematic masterpiece

[setacin]

CAN YOU SHOW US THE HELMET/HEADGEAR YOU MADE FOR BONE MAGE XISUMA

YES OF COURSE!!!!! :D

its still Definitely a work in progress (the lower jaw isnt even on here yet LMAO) but here’s what i’ve got so far!!

[tarmac-rat]

Johnny Silverhand being the guitarist of his band versus Keanu Reeves being the bassist of his band is very funny to me. Ultimate personality difference between a character and their actor.

[felixisfruity]

WAITTTTT BREAKING DEVELOPMENT WHADDAHELL!!! apparently yeti crabs are part of a family called "squat lobster" which is a specific kind of crustacean that is just flat as fuck with long arms

there's so many different types of Creatures out there that appeal to me the same way those idiots that eat hypothermal vent soup off their hairy-ass arms do oh my god. WAIT speaking of yeti crabs they're so weird they get not only their own genus (Kiwa) but their own fucking family for some reason called Kiwadae.

there's 4 (that we know of) separate offshoots of yeti crabs:

Spiky Arm (Kiwa puravida) ((which doesnt actually eat the hypothermal vent soup, instead they eat out of cold seeps which is nearly the exact opposite.))

Thick Af And 90% Shell Guy (Kiwa Tyleri) ((got its nickname of Hoff Crab because it's hairy arms and shell reminded people of David Hasselhoff's tits))

and finally, Hairy Fuck (Kiwa hirsuta) ((this one doesn't even have real fur, instead it has setae which mimics/resembles fur because it's fucking Weird and it can either be straight blond jagged hair, or fluffy and white hair. depends on where the crab lives))

wow!! completely innocent and interesting asks in my askbox!!! im sure it’s exactly the same for you!!!

[sea-of-dust]

hii! can i rq kaoru seta and hina hikawa (separate) with a s/o who’s very clingy with them🫶🫶

Close to you!

Hina and Kaoru!

Summary: maybe the fly by dayglow reference was a little too litteral-

Notes: I guarantee you bandori annons appear at the ungodly hours 😭. Thank you for the request annon!

GENDER NEUTRAL READER

She doesn't notice you're being clingy she's pretty clingy too! She thinks it's normal

You two don't even notice you're are being clingy too each other, but if you two ever separated both your friends would say one of you would just kinda dose off more often or daydream.

"I miss Hina..." "it's been three minutes" "huuuu"

You walk home with her. Holding her hand sometimes singing pastel palette songs. She starts developing a habit of side tracking asking you if you want to stop by a convince store or a movie. You two would start having dates after school atleast once a month

You would get unessaryly clingy at times. Especially if Hina experienced even the most minor unfavorable thing. You wouldn't let many people close to her unless you knew them personally she would tell you it was alright but you still kept close just in case

Someone would tell her that you're WAYY too clingy and she would be like "Nah I don't think so" with the most calm smile on her face. "No like they're like a no personal space clingy." "nahhh they aren't like that ^^"

She does kinda understand tho if she thinks about what you do in hindsight. She was at a concert tour you called her almost every day making sure she was alright. You often bit your nails thinking of what would happen to Hina while on tour. You'd also cling closely to her in public areas saying it was so you two wouldn't get lost in the crowd...eh she still dosent really care.

She noticed how you walk on the exterior of the road. She didn't mind till the day it rained pretty hard. You brought an umbrella for her to stay under and walked home with her when a car splashed water at you two you got in the way of it making sure most of it wouldn't go onto Hina. "Ohhh" "?" "So that's why you do that" "?" "Nothing"

You two usually call each other when you get home talking about random things till the other has to go or sleep. You don't say it outloud but you hope she calls you back later

You're kinda like her scary dog privileges. If she were to DARE to be tired around you. You encourage her to rest as you sat close to her letting her lean on you if you're that close. You would talk to others in almost whispers if anyone were to speak a little louder than you you'd look at them annoyed.

How fleeting~ someone so close to her they got into the drama club for her. Getting in was no joke too since alot of Kaoru's other fans were trying out to be closer to her. "I only have small interests in this as soon as we graduate Im not gonna do thus anymore" "but that small interest will spark a fleeting long lasting love for the theater!" "Yea whatever" "fleeting~"

You don't tell her this but another tiny reason you got into drama is to kiss her in front of the audience, specifically her fans. Just imagining kissing kaoru for your role as sleeping beauty infront of an audience is a nice feeling and made you try harder.

She doesn't mind your clinginess but she thinks it's mostly cause of her popularity

"My dear are you jealous of my fans" she elegantly flops herself onto you. "What-" "Why the reason you're always around me is to monitor my fans so they don't steal me away~" "that's not-" "HOW ROMATIC" she pulls you in for an embrase as you except your fate.

You don't mind cooking for her usually if she comes over. She tires not to say she likes miso soup yet still can't refuse another bite. "Ehhh why are you shaking Kaoru~" "..." "I thought you didn't like miso soup" your smile widens "..." "😼" "you can have it know you don't like that fancy stuff anyway"

She tried to cook for you as a way to say thanks, but you would always appear for cuddles out of nowhere before she starts. Once you get a hold of her there's no escape she's staying there for a week by then your parents are already treating her like their in-law.

She called you a blanket monster once was the first time you did this to her actually. You made a joke about a monster comming outta no where and eating the both of them in the shape of a blanket. It was all fun and games till she wanted to get something to snack on. "Whatcha doing?" As soon as she turns around you flop onto her the blanket swallowing her. "HAKA-" "shush you'll wake someone" you harshly shut her down leading her back to your room. "Unhand me blanket monster for I must retrieve dashing food made by my beloved s/o!" "Thats a lie you went out here to eat my left over little bites" "eh-" "back to bed with you~" "blanket fieeenndddd" she dramatically follows

You like appearing out of nowhere to hug or kiss her. One time, you came in and kissed her when you saw the hhw group in front of her. You apologized profusely to them. Yes, kaoru uses this to try and tease you.

"Remember that one time you kissed me in front of my bandmates." "Remember that one time you grabbed my thigh instead of my hand while we were on a plane," she turns around in mere shock you mentioned that.

HHW had called you favor involving her specially them making a robot version of her because someone told Kokoro having a robot band is a smart idea 💀. "We wanna know what you think of her!" "Alright?" As soon as you got over there you felt your eye bags get darker. "This is pretty wonky. Some of these parts don't really match Kaoru at all...the animation could suffer cause of this" you went on and on describing Kaorus physical appearance so well Kokoro stood there dumbfounded she almost frowed before you said you had to go. "Well uh...thank you?" "My pleasure ^^"

[bpdiruma]

misaki okusawa and how i see her with BPD: an analysis

hi! as someone with BPD myself i have seen some symptoms of BPD in misaki, and i wanted to talk about it. a lot of people don’t typically see her with BPD so i just wanted to share my thoughts. this will be a long yap sesh so enjoy if you’re interested

what is BPD? BPD by definition is “A mental disorder characterized by unstable moods, behavior, and relationships.”. it is a personality disorder that can be caused by trauma or even genetics.

having a favorite person: a huge part of this disorder is having a favorite person. what is a favorite person exactly? the one person (or can be multiple people, but it’s more common to only have one) that the person with the disorder is attached to. someone with BPD will seek attention and validation from their favorite person, go to them for support, or even look up to them. it can vary, but overall it is a person’s with the disorder’s favorite person. but it’s much stronger than someone without it typically having someone they like more than most.

who is misaki’s favorite person? let me pose a thought to you. kaoru seta. you may think i’m biased b/c i personally like kaomisa, but let me pose actual canon evidence and facts. this is going to be LONG because there is a lot of proof here so stick with me.

the fact there is two stories at this point that emphasize misaki’s attachment to kaoru. the fact there’s more than one tells me that there’s simply something more there and she feels a connection towards her. the two stories in question are a fleeting’s night dream and to those who will depart.

misaki seeks validation from kaoru. back in band story 2, kaoru shows up at the park. she tries to seek an answer from kaoru, which kaoru literally calls her out for. she tries to seek that validation and understanding towards her.

the only thing that calmed misaki down in a fleeting night’s dream was kaoru simply being herself. due to the fight with her parents (which i will circle back to by the way), misaki is all over the place. once she goes to kaoru’s house, kaoru pretty much just talks about herself. weirdly enough, this calms misaki down. what proves this further that it’s a favorite person connection is that even kokoro and hagumi are super confused on WHY kaoru talking about herself calmed her down. the two sillies themselves don’t even know how that works. with favorite people, sometimes the only thing that can calm someone down is their favorite person.

misaki’s whole attitude in to those who will depart. while everyone else is focused on nicolina, misaki’s focused on kaoru. she is MORE worried about what’s going on with kaoru. yeah it could also be explained by the fact that misaki didn’t know how long kaoru would be going for. but, there’s more in this story. i’m gonna make a separate bullet point for this because it’s such a big thing.

misaki’s anger towards kaoru in the same story. misaki is never ever truly mad at kaoru. she can be annoyed by her in past stories, yeah. but she never genuinely got angry. but for the first time, she got mad at kaoru. it even got to the point where she got kaoru confused and kaoru herself got nervous. misaki pretty much takes it personally that kaoru didn’t take up her decisions to go abroad to misaki first. this is very common with this disorder, feeling like the favorite person has to involve them in any way possible. also, this anger can be considered splitting. splitting is when the person with BPD is genuinely angry and can see their favorite person as bad. she was genuinely angry with kaoru and saw it as a terrible thing that she did not take it up with misaki herself.

the mere fact misaki literally fell at the end of the story in relief when she realized kaoru wasn’t going to be gone long. that just speaks a lot of volumes to me personally.

misaki and how the idea of kaoru leaving caused her to be miserable and not able to enjoy anything else around her. she cannot enjoy the festivities regarding nicolina around her because she was more focused on what was going on with kaoru. it pretty much consumes her, this is proven that the whole story is focused on her trying to get past its consumption of her.

the fact the only time misaki got out of her shell to perform as herself instead of as michelle because of kaoru leaving. like that is a major thing for her, as she became attached to michelle in the time she spent with the band. she wanted kaoru to see her as herself sending her off, which can show how she wants kaoru’s attention.

lastly (holy crap this list is long) how she was acting at the end of the show in to those who will depart. the manner she speaks to her says a lot. she is talking to her as if she’ll never see her again. with BPD, the feeling of a favorite person going away for a bit can feel like they will never come back.

misaki’s heightened emotions: misaki’s emotions are very strong. those with BPD have heightened emotions due to the amygdala (the emotion processing center in the brain) is shrunk, therefore making them more sensitive. misaki has been shown to be shaken up by things that wouldn’t bother someone without the disorder. such as:

in a fleeting night’s dream, her book being thrown out by her parents. yes, it can hold a sentimental meaning to her. but she also started a fight about it and decided to avoid going home over it. holding a sentimental meaning can actually line up with BPD, as sentimental things are usually as a result of emotion. not that everyone who has a sentimental feeling towards something has the disorder, but it makes sense for misaki’s case.

once again, with kaoru leaving. she felt like she was being unreasonable for it, she felt like it wasn’t normal to be that upset. she knew what her feelings were from a realistic standpoint, but couldn’t shake the feeling away. that can be the case for someone who has BPD and is aware that they do (like me), where they know their feelings are unreasonable, but can’t help but feel it anyway.

misaki’s black and white thinking: misaki has black and white thinking. this is a very common part of BPD.

what exactly is black and white thinking?: black and white thinking is when you think of things as completely good or completely bad. there is no grey area for thinking. there is no seeing the complexity of a situation, only that it is completely good or completely bad.

what examples of black and white thinking does misaki have?: let’s look back at the second band story for hello happy world. in the story, the rest of the band takes upon misaki’s jobs for her as an act of helping her. this was because misaki had so much to do and was under a lot of pressure. the band did this as an act to help her, and thought they were doing the right thing for her. despite what they came across, they were trying to help her. misaki does not see this, and instead takes this as an “all bad” scenario, thinking that due to this she meant NOTHING to the band and was not needed anymore. immediately jumping to this assumption can be a symptom of BPD. she does not see the whole complexity of the situation, and resorts to that. that’s the whole plot of band story 2.

misaki’s proneness to anger: misaki can be quick to anger. i’m gonna talk about that more.

let’s bring back the mention of her fighting with her parents. her first reaction was to argue. she is quite angry about this for a good amount of time until kaoru comes around and helps. her arguing with her parents can show a lack of restraint on her part, and how she snaps at them on the phone while she’s with the band. BPD can make someone have a lack of restraint of what they are doing. she immediately regrets it after, as she didn’t mean to do it in front of everyone.

also, her interactions with kokoro in band story 2. when she first screamed at her, is what i mean. i honestly don’t blame her for this, kokoro needed some sense knocked into her. genuinely might’ve been the best way to execute it because it seems like kokoro wouldn’t have listened to misaki calmly talking. but still, shows she can be quick to anger.

instances of social isolation: misaki can have a tendency to isolate herself/avoidances when she’s upset with someone or a situation. this can be a way for those who have BPD to cope with the situation due to strong and overwhelming emotions. here are some examples.

her avoiding going home from her parents. she isolated herself from the band too until kaoru found a way for misaki to be comfortable enough to ask her to come with kaoru. kaoru was incredibly smart for this by the way. because even though misaki wanted help, she isolated anyway. it wasn’t until kaoru gave her a way to do it, misaki did not want to flat out ask for help.

in band story 2, she runs off from kokoro when she is spoken to. misaki was already clearly experiencing heightened feelings from the encounter, and leaving was the only thing she can do for her feelings at that point. she felt like running off was the best thing to do.

as a bonus i’m gonna mention the april fools game, girl’s blossom project. of course it isn’t taken as canon as it is a dating sim made for april fool’s. but i take how the characters react as something they would do in canon. so, misaki’s route is a bit different compared to the other girls. she makes you wait for her. prior to this, misaki acts strange and upset. she doesn’t necessarily tell you why, but she is clearly upset. she avoids you, for lack of a better word. she avoids you til the last second, until the very end of the route. and this is the good ending. it is very interesting that she isolated herself for so long as you wait for her after she was upset and then suddenly appeared again. just a little bonus.

smaller details that show her symptoms:

misaki is an anxious person. anxiety can be a part of BPD as well. she clearly struggles with some form of anxiety. i would say social, as she felt humiliated at first to admit to other people she was part of the band. also, her area conversation where she runs away from a child because she thought the kid was gonna hug her.

depression. BPD has depressive symptoms, and to me it seems as if misaki was heavily depressed during band story 2. she literally thinks she is not needed and that the band would be better off without her. she asks michelle if she can ever make her smile too.

i love misaki okusawa and personally as someone with BPD i see a lot of her in myself. if you read this whole thing thank you!

i have references for everything i said, so if you have questions about anything i said just ask and i will show you a picture or the quote :]