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andhumanslovedstories · 1 year ago

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I was in the ICU last night taking care of medsurg overflow patients—that’s when you aren’t sick enough to be in the ICU anymore but we don’t have a bed anywhere else for you yet. I don’t like floating to the ICU. It’s such a coin flip as to whether you’re gonna have a hard night or an easy one. You almost never get a full load of four patients, and that’s so nice, but the one or two or three patients you do have are all sick enough to have needed intensive care six hours ago. They’re usually still not doing amazingly. But they’re floor status now, so it’s medsurg patient ratios. But if you were a medsurg floor, the charge would probably be like “let’s not give three patients of this high an acuity to one nurse.”

Also some of them are NOT floor status. They’re just “slightly less likely to die in the next 12 hours status.” What we really need is a step down unit which is somewhere between the extreme high acuity of the ICU and the catchall category of medsurg. Instead we have a couple units that are “essentially step down units,” which means they are just medsurg units but you know your night is probably gonna be so hard.

Besides the patients, the ICU is just so spread out and lonely. Most critical care patients have a 1:1 ratio—one patient to one nurse. That’s on account of how intensive the care is, you see. But it also means whenever you’re like “I would love some help,” everyone else on the floor is like “if I step more than six feet away from my patient, he will die so badly.” It makes it really hard to casually engage in conversation, especially since I’m not qualified to do like anything in the ICU rooms, so I would clearly be going over there to expressly talk to them. And I don’t want to have a conversation! I just want to establish some rapport. I love bounding ideas off other staff! I love being about to shoot the shit a lil bit and then be like “well I have rounds” when one of us has to wander off. No one here has rounds. They are already Right There.

Anyway then the shift ends, and it’s time to pass off your patients. If you’re lucky it’s to another medsurg nurse who also looks a kid realizing too late into the lecture that this is not their class. But sometimes you give report to an ICU nurse who asks questions that are so pertinent and are so fair to ask, but they’re also like. the kind of questions you ask when you expect the person you’re getting report from is another critical care nurse who only has one patient. At a certain point, I just wanna be like “what do you want from me, dude. i’m stupid. every lab you’re asking about is in the chart and you understand them better than I do. can I go home”

That also means when they give you a real softball like “and how many IVs does he have” and you’re like “uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh let’s go count them together shall we” you feel like the biggest dipshit in the world. And then they ask you three more questions each easier than the last as you have traumatic flashbacks to nursing school, specifically the parts where you failed a quiz and also misspelled your name. It just ends the shift on a bad note. Not even a bad note. Real burp of a shift change.

I’m feeling particularly salty because I overheard a couple critical care nurses last night joking about how medsurg nurses are so nervous about the medical boarders and basically saying that we’re always freaking out over nothing while being completely oblivious to the actual symptoms that matter. And as a nurse who once called rapid response because my patient’s heart beat weird for about twelve seconds, I was like “hey. you’re correct. but also must be nice to have just one patient and all shift to read every single thing about them and to sit outside their door next to your fully stocked equipment cart, and to be able to watch them all shift.” And it’s like yeah, critical care nurses can take all the blood out of a person and then put it all back better than before. But I know to turn off lights when I leave a patient room at three in the morning, and apparently in the ICU that’s an even more illusion trick.

But anyway it’s twelve hours later and I’m on the other side of a good good sleep, so I’m less cranky, and back to being appreciative of the specific skills critical care nurses being that are so essential, and also I was like, how pressed can I really be about one group of nurses joking about another group of nurses. that’s like 25 percent of my blog at this point.

#nursing tag

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be-ready-when-i-say-go · 3 months ago

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i need a joe x reader date night 🙏🏾

One for the Road--A 'Roll for Initiative' Blurb

I feel like Joe is a nice dinner date kind of guy and reader’s an activity kind of person. So, we’re going to get the best of both worlds.

CW: 18+ Content (Smut adjacent/implied smut, but no actual smut)

Series Masterlist

Complete Masterlist

___________________________

Date Night--7PM. No ifs, ands, or buts. Your outfit is hanging on my side of the closet. <3

He might get a little shit about not giving you proper time to get ready, but that’s not something Joe is terribly concerned about considering he always has a plan.

It’s timed perfectly. It’s not so late after a wash and style that it’s time for a new one, and it’s not too soon after one where your hair hasn’t ‘settled’. A phenomenon as the months pass and the two you ease on towards two years together, that Joe has witnessed many times. The kind of thing he wouldn’t have believed until he witnessed it--and though it’s subtle, there is a tiny bit of a bell curve to any new hair style of yours. And forever calculated Joe has spent the last three months finding the average time before your hair is ‘settled’ just for a moment like this.

With you back in school, much to your own worry about being able to actually get anything remotely like a business off the ground, and working part time as a receptionist at a more private clinic, you should be getting back home today around 3 today. Today’s a class day and though the schedule seems jam packed, you’re handling with grace that stuns Joe because he’s not even sure if he could handle schoolwork on top of everything else too.

But your arrival back home at 3 should be more than enough time for you to fuss Joe out on his commute back home and still have plenty of time to get ready.

Joe places the sticky note onto the bathroom mirror, eases the light off and spots you still hugging his pillow beneath the sheets. Your alarm will be going off soon though. Joe’s careful as he creeps back into the bathroom, pressing a kiss to your temple. “Love you,” he whispers, finding his bag near the door and heading downstairs.

Though Joe’s more a dinner date kind of guy, you adore activities and events to go to. When Joe caught wind of a live jazz band playing at a pretty prestigious restaurant, a ticketed event nonetheless, he had to snag tickets and knew he’d have to tip the scales on who’s month it would be to plan a date night too. With alternating months between the two of you, and a firm goal to have at least one date night a month even during the season, Joe had to do some sweet talking to have you go back to back in order to make it work.

It ended with you ‘stealing’ of his date ideas--staying home to fix personal pizzas and watching a movie you both wanted to see, a strategically used staple for Joe even in all its variants during the season. It can't be used all the time, but used with enough frequency that it’s never a shock that it’s his suggestion.

But tonight--tonight’s going to be different. That much, Joe is sure of. It might’ve taken Joe a week and a half to find the right outfit for you--a task he prided himself on bolstering to the boys though he did have to lament how difficult it was to find just the right thing, working maybe a little too meticulous to take stock of what you already owned so that the pieces he bought weren’t duplicates. But Joe is proud of what he found. He crawled through downtown trying to find something that you’d like and that would fit the atmosphere. It would’ve been easy to ask his assistant to help him, but Joe wanted to do this himself, wanted to say that he picked it out, that he spent the hours while you were either at work or in class combing through racks. That it was him asking various employee’s about sizing, that he consulted online size charts.

All done by him.

Putting the urge to scream aside, I greatly appreciate you setting up whatever this is, reads your first text an hour later as Joe pauses between sets. The second one rests just behind. Putting the urge to scream on, what have you done? Where are we going? Lecture today is going to be boring now!

Joe laughs, fingers working over the keys. You’ll find out tonight.

Joseph. Lee. Burrow. His full name rattles his phone in three separate text messages, but he huffs as he reads them.

Incorrect. Please try again.

Hon, honeybunny bunches of oats, sweetiepie, pookie, snookums, what in the ever lasting fuck have you put together?

You’ll see tonight.

That’s all he says before returning to the tasks at hand. But he listens for the buzz of his phone--only to happen twice, and smiles as he thinks about what you might’ve responded with.

Joe knows what to expect in the vague sense of the words. Knows what he bought, knows what he’s going to wear, knows where to drive you too, but what he doesn’t fully account for, what he can’t factor in is just how deadly you look in the deep burgundy. He knew it was be a nice color against your melanated skin, knew the cut would be flattering, that the peep of the black and gold shoe would seal the deal, but when he steps out of the bathroom to see you dressed, his jaw goes slack just a little. All the noise about accounting for traffic and the valet parking and which car to take immediately quiets.

All Joe can think about is how good you look. How the material of the shirt and the pants hugs your body effortlessly. He groans, head gone lose on his neck. “Goddamn.” Joe peeks at you again, just one eye this time and groans again. “Goddamn.”

He hadn’t expected that he’d done this well, that you’d look this breathtaking. You’re attractive, Joe would never lie about that. But the color stands out so richly against your skin, makes you look like you belong to another plane, too much for Joe’s mere moral presence.

He takes your hips into his hands, tugs you in close for the kiss and knows by the rumble of your laughter he’s in for a night better than he could’ve ever imagined. “You,” Joe starts before pressing another kiss to your lips, “look,” kiss, “incredible.” The fourth kiss is longer--the edge of desperation rising in Joe’s gut to forgo the live music and peel you out of this outfit--but Joe’s stronger than, wants to give you an incredible night out like he promised. That doesn’t stop him from having the flesh of your ass gripped by his palms. “God, what did I do to get this lucky?”

“You’ve just been you,” your reply is soft, lips brushing against his as you speak.

It’s such a sincere response, where Joe’s learned to anticipate the lethal comebacks, the teasing hot lash of your tongue, the tenderness in your voice renders him a little speechless, makes him pause to take in your face. A soft edge to your eyes paired with the warm smile nearly melts Joe, makes him nearly turn into a puddle in the shared closet.

“You’ve always been you. Sometimes a pain in my ass, but mostly not.”

Joe laughs, a head shake paired with it, because of course. Of course there’s that teasing edge. “It’s a surprise. I think you’ll like it though. But,” Joe returns, “you can’t keep distracting me. So one more kiss, and no more, or else we’ll be late.”

“You’ve never complained about being late before,” you laugh, but nod even as you speak. “Consider it understood though. No more distractions.”

Joe savors that one last kiss, cups your cheek with his palms, parts your lips with his tongue, taking down the taste of you into his own lungs. Commits to memory the way you feel against him. Gets lost in the sigh you release right as the two of you break away from each other. He could get lost in you, never be worried about finding his way back out if he’s honest.

You leave the closet, headed towards the bedroom and Joe can only stare, can only watch you as you go. He’d be lying if he didn’t think about the future with you--what it might be to see you walking down the aisle to him, expanding the family between you two. Usually in bursts, in pieces at a time when he’s about to fall asleep. But the thoughts have become more frequent. The daydreams feel like they’re solidifying into a want--a goal, and goals are dangerous for Joe.

Joe pulls himself from the future thoughts and gets dressed, knows you like him with the nice watch and the rolled up sleeves, so Joe’s precise in how he dresses, gets a couple pumps of his cologne out and onto his neck.

The scent’s only in the air for a minute but the exaggerated sniffs hit the air and you come rounding the corner of the closet door. “Out,” Joe directs, grabbing his shoes from the bottom rack. “I’m not fooling around with you. Not until after.”

“But it’s my favorite cologne,” you whine, turning at the command back towards the bedroom.

“Why do you think I put it on?” Joe laughs. “I know exactly what I’m doing.”

The two of you make it out on time, though you do stop at the door for just one kiss, all but beg for it on your knees and Joe can’t resist the fullness of your lips, how you melt into each kiss like it’s the first. Joe’s not new to the receiving end of being wanted. But he’s never been desired, not like this, not like you desire him--the gas stove just waiting for the twist of the knob to ignite.

It sends his stomach into knots each time, but Joe wouldn’t have it any other way.

Arriving to the building, even Joe wonders if he got the address wrong. It’s a hotel, but he triple checked the address, so it is right. Has to be. Joe helps you out and hands the keys over with ease. There’s a small crowd on the outskirts of the lobby, but Joe spots a sign directing those their for the live band in the correct direction so it settles his initial flare of nerves.

The table is draped in white and the chairs are a plush deep red. He helps you into your seat first before pulling one of the chairs situated to the side closer to you. “You’re ridiculous,” you laugh.

“I’m going to always sit next to you. I don’t care,” Joe returns.

The lighting is dimmed, the room’s angled so that most people have a really good view of the stage. It’s small--probably why there were tickets--but so far it feels nice. Seems like a quiet place to dine. The stage is already littered with instruments, and seats.

“How did you hear about this?” you ask. “I saw the sign about a live band on the way in.”

“Internet’s a powerful tool.”

“Seriously,” you return. “This place seems nice.”

Joe’s always careful about this usage of social media. There are people who are watching. But he likes to keep up with local events. “Burner account, baby. Let’s just hope the food doesn’t suck and the band’s good. Because I can fix bad food with Wendy’s. Can’t fix shit music.”

“Someone said two accounts is too much to keep track of.”

“Well, that guy’s a liar, whoever it was that said that,” Joe grins. You brought it up once when Joe vented about the perils of social media to you. Not that you hadn’t seen it yourself, the flood of comments on your various photo dumps over the last couple of years--the dumps you do of the D&D one-shots still get the most views but there are more voices in your circle too. Joe tossed the idea around for a little, but felt like since social media already felt like a chore in and of itself that he didn’t want to add a more complex layer to it with second accounts. But as Joe tested it, he found it wasn't that bad to handle. He's grateful for the ability to keep taps on things for you, and just in general in a way that feels like there's less pressure.

“A handsome liar, whoever that man is,” you jest in return.

The menu looks small, even to Joe, but he still has his fingers crossed as the hostess takes your order that they’ll still prove him wrong. “How are classes?” Joe asks. With you back in school, Joe is mindful of not keeping you out too late constantly, but you are more than capable of vocalizing if your schedule’s not as free as it might seem.

“Fine. It’s accounting right now and I understand it--most of the time. Not my favorite, but I’ll survive.”

“I could tutor you,” Joe grins. “I keep the old accounting wheels greased.”

“I would like to pass the class.”

“Ouch. That’s ice cold, baby.” The laughter is short, but sweet. “I’m proud of you though. Deciding to go back to school to chase your dreams, it’s not always easy. But I admire your tenacity.”

“Thank you. Sometimes I feel like I’m crazy for doing it, but your encouragement means a lot.”

“Of course. I meant when I said that I always want to be your cheerleader. Want to see you succeed beyond your wildest dreams.”

“You gotta stop looking at me like that,” you laugh, lifting the menu to cover part of your face.

Joe knows that soft smile on your face, knows your cheeks are warm too, even if your skin won’t show the flush. “Looking at you like what?”

“Like you love me.”

“Godly, what should I do? Look at you like I hate you?”

“No,” you laugh. “It’s just really intense. It’s not the pure jump my bones look, which I’m always a fan of. It’s different--you just look at me like you love me.”

Joe does know what you mean. Has seen the rare candid of himself when he’s been out with you at events or for a night. It’s a kind of look that when Joe first saw the photo of himself he wanted to cringe, hide away from the utter softness, like butter left out to reach room temperature warmth. The truth of the reality though is that he does love you. So completely that he wants to carry it every single day, wear the band, call you his spouse. Have you call him your husband--like you did for your mother’s surgery so he could sit with you and go up to the room. He always wants to be a team with you, be in your corner, watch you succeed. Have you there for him when he needs it, support him too. The two of you never scared to do the hard work of loving each other even when it’d be easier not to.

“I do love you,” Joe returns quietly. There’s a soft voice of someone in the background introducing the band, but Joe’s only watching you, the shy flicker of your gaze from beneath your lashes. “I think I want to love you forever.”

“You think?” you retort, placing the menu down to the table, in the space that the other table settings have been removed from the table meant to seat two other people.

“Only if you want me to.”

“And if I do?”

“Then I know I want to love you forever.” The keys twinkle around them, the throaty cello bass a deep undercurrent as the music swells. It’s not a proposal. Joe would never want to do that publicly and though he wanted more time to chew over these emotions, wanted to spend more time with himself to understand what this would all mean, Joe knows it doesn’t really matter. The truth would always remain. “I think the phrase my husband has a nice ring to it, eventually.”

You lean in a bit closer, pinky tracing lines over Joe’s forearm. The brush is so soft it makes his spine shiver. “Too bad there’s no security guards here to bribe.”

“Too bad indeed. Next time, though, I’ll make sure of it.”

The food comes shortly after, portions much too small for the price tag. You and Joe glance at each other--the looks both an exchange of knowing. “4 for 4,” the two of you echo at the same time, knowing that soon after this, you’ll be pulling into the drive thru. The edges of your laughter bounce through the notes of the music, which causes a few of the tables nearby to glare at the two of you. The sneers don’t matter though.

The meal is good at the very least, even if small, and the music is lively. Joe watches you entranced part way through the meal by the band as they play, your eyes closing as your body sways to the tempo. Joe’s not a dancer, would never pretend to be one, but watching you in your seat makes him want to learn a little bit more, be able to keep up with you in a way that seems so intuitive to you. The hour and a half passes much too soon. Joe’s still more than happy to sit, one hand wrapped around yours and watch you enjoy the show.

“A shame,” Joe starts as he takes the exit with the Wendy’s sign blaring in the night’s dark sky, “that they don’t give larger portions.”

“I mean, it was a pretty upscale experience. And the average person doesn’t have a goal of 200 grams of protein.”

“It’s one gram of protein per pound, it’s not that crazy,” Joe huffs, easing in behind the Nissan Rogue in front of them. “Frosty this time?”

“No, don’t want anyone to complain about me being gassy later.”

“Who would ever complain about that?”

“Don’t know. Some guy named Joe.”

“Fuck that guy.”

The kiss is swift after the car inches up. Your breath is warm against his cheek, teeth grazing at the lobe of his ear. “I plan to. Tonight.”

“I will leave this line so fast your head will spin, baby.”

“Spin my head after we get our food. I do have higher priorities than rocking your world.” You press another kiss on his cheek. The words are a punch to his gut and it hurts just like it should--like the tendrils tightening around his desire, telling him he can let it all out, let it all go. He just has to get your food first and make it back home in one piece. “As a thank you for a really great date night. And because that cologne has been driving me crazy all night. And because I love you. And because, goddamn, you’re so fucking handsome.”

“Promise?” Joe grins, risking a glance over to you. The answer is already clear. Your palms have slipped down his thigh, teasing right over the edge of his crotch, but not directly over the hardening length. He just wants to hear you say it.

“Promise.” You punctuate the word with your palm over his cock and Joe has never been more grateful for the tinted window than right now in this Wendy’s drive thru.

#joe burrow #joe burrow fanfic #joe burrow fic #joe burrow x black reader #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow series #joe burrow smut adjacent #h writes #roll for initiative #roll for initiative blurb #about roll for initiative

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moony-rabbit · 8 months ago

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i was literally JUST talking about how good yuri is so hard to find with a friend today, ravioli ravioli give me the yuri reccomenduoli please & thank you🙏

OMGGGGGGG I didn't expect someone to actually ask me for yuri recommendations but wow! Anways here we go!

Actual GLs

After The Curtain Call

A manhwa about the budding romance between a theatre nerd and her favorite actress. It's really short compared to other manhwa/manga on the list, only 51 chapters, but it is SOOOOOOO good. The art is nice, the characters are funny and adorable, the plot is clean cut and doesn't feel rushed at all. A perfect choice if you want to read something relaxing and comedic. It's one of my favorite manhwa!

Her Tale of Shim Chong

A historical love story of two girls from different social classes: a beggar and a noble lady, who just got married to the local chancellor. The art is simply stunning. The story works with some rather heavy themes, mainly sexism but also involve depiction of suicide and SA (none of them are realized, but still some parts can be quite triggering if you're sensitive about the subject). This one is over 80 chapters long with side stories.

(side note but apparently the author of this manhwa defended another artist who used revenge porn as art reference. It's not related to Her Tale of Shim Chong's content, but I still want to mention that just in case.)

Not So Shoujo Love Story

Now this one is a masterpiece. If you love a good laugh, you surely can't skip this one. The art is gorgeous since day one but it keeps getting better. The humor is off the chart. It isn't afraid of dabbling in heavy subjects at time either, and the drama is executed quite well (though you'll have to brace yourself for a lot of mood whiplash). There's currently two seasons, but it seems like there might be a third in the future. Anyhow, this one is a 10/10 for me.

She Loves to Cook, and She Loves to Eat

A lovely slice-of-life manga about two neighbors falling in love. I really like this manga, it's like a breeze of fresh air after reading so many silly young yuri. The two main characters are all adults, so the tone of the manga is softer than the typical schoolgirl yuri slice-of-life. I really like how fat positive it is too (definitely a big plus point). I heard this one was picked up by a publisher though, so the English translation got taken down. Idk if they have published it yet or not, but if you ever come across it, this manga is definitely worth the money.

Butterfly Soup and Butterfly Soup 2

This one is a little different to the other ones on the list, as it's a video game. The game is free to download, and there's even a mobile version so you can install it on your phone. It tells the story of four Asian American girls and their adventure with the school's baseball club. The main characters in the first game are the two on the right of the picture, and the other two are focused on in the second game. The game talks a lot about racism, queerphobia, xenophobia, and also touches on disabilities too (one of the main characters is deaf in one ear). I really like the game, and it's pretty fast to play through too. If you want to try out a yuri game, you can try out this one.

Special mention: I don't want to add another button for it bc this is getting long already, but if you're interested in GL games and want to find more, NomnomNami does have a lot of yuri games in stock for you, like her tears were my light.

The Guy She Was Interested In Wasn't A Guy At All

Okay I have no idea how did I forget to add this one to the list when I first made the draft THIS IS A CRIME. Anyways, this was one of my first GL ever. I read it in English on Manhwatop at first, stopped, then found it again in Vietnamese and have been following it since. The art is phenomenal, the interaction between the two girls are heart-fluttering, the tension is well-written and doesn't feel forced or dragged out like comedies sometimes have. I really, really, really like the main girls as well as their friends, it's just *chef's kiss*. Wish I have half of Koga's rizz really.

Not confirmed GLs/not romance-oriented but has a hefty amount of yuri hints anyways

(this is a very indulgent list because I REALLY like these ones, please understand (* _ _) 人)

Kiyo in Kyoto: From The Maiko House

A slice-of-life manga about the daily life in a maiko manor, pretty obvious from the name. What makes me add it into the list is, the manga is absolutely packed with yuri subtext. Actually, it's not even subtext anymore. Every once a dozen chapters there will be one that seems like it walks straight out of a GL. Besides the subtext, the story itself is really cute too. The manga is nearly 300 chapters now but they'll be over in the blink of an eye once you start it. If you need something to heal your soul after a long day, Kiyo in Kyoto might be the perfect choice for you.

The Dark Lord's Confession

Okay there's a million things I could say about this one and yet none of them can do it justice. It has everything: humor, drama, angst, hot women, amazing art, great music, hot women, strong lovable characters, morally grey characters with the power to divide the fandom into two. This manhwa is classified as fantasy, but the feelings between Lapis and Calla (the ones above) have been confirmed as romantic love. The lore is mindblowing, to say the least. There's some rather annoying loredumping conversations but if you are willing to close an eye for it, everything else will be more than enough to outweight the occasional exposition. Beware for mood whiplash though, this manhwa will make you keel over from laughing and kick you in the gut with a steel toe shoe in the span of three chapters.

Star Dream Idol Project

Before you say anything I'll have to let you know I am a HUGE. Fan of this one. I first read it in 6th grade and thought "oh wow these girls are def gonna be the endgame". Guess how heartbroken I was when it turned out untrue. I still have a lot of complaints about the loveline but let's put that aside for now.

This is one of my favorite manhua, not just because of the gayass friendship between the two main characters, but also because of how well-written everyone is. There's no "female side characters being evil for no reason" bullshit. All of them are treated with respect as real, valid human beings instead of canon fodders. And while I'm not fond of the love interests, I have to admit the way the author handles romance in this manhua is quite unexpected. My favorite thing about it is that it values the girls as themselves and does not force them to enter a romantic relationship at the end of the story. In fact, only one of them got married at the end, the other two are still single and happy with their life.

About the two main characters, they can only be accurately described as soulmates. It will always be them. They are the most important person in each other's life because of their own choosing. The devotion they have for each other is insane. They tick like every single boxes in childhood friends romance tropes I'm not even exaggerating. If you read it and get hooked like I was, I suggest you stop reading at the final chapter (351) and do not read the side story to avoid heartbreak.

----

That's all for now! If you do check them out, pls stop by and drop an ask if you find it good! (*^▽^*)

#bunny answer

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scilessweetheart · 2 years ago

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quotes from my senior year lit class’s modern adaptation of hamlet (titled “keeping up with hamlet”) that only get funnier the longer they sit in my brain

“how are you doing?” “oh, you know. same soup, just reheated, baby!” - hamlet, pulling a monster energy drink out of an industrial sized fridge

“polonius! why’d you stand under my copy of the atlantic?” -hamlet, after beating him to death

*snorts a line of coke and then introduces herself* - gertrude

*tagline in asides is “feels super awkward”* - hortatio

“listen to me. hamlet’s a douchebag!” - laertes

*played by a 6 foot man with a thot knot and a scrunchie* - ophelia

“he gave me his favorite monster tab necklace! plus, he’s an aries and i’m a libra. we’re a match. i even checked his natal chart.” - ophelia

“women! they’re so caught up in things. they don’t even know about the stock market. it just… it saddens me.” - polonius

*reading texts from hamlet to ophelia* “‘ophelia. i love you. i dream of smelling your skin when you sleep. if you don’t love me i will kill myself.’ you know. some real criminal minds shit.” - polonius

“life’s a prison and you’re my cell mate, guildencrantz!” - hamlet

“hey hamlet, what are you doing?” “watching the… moving pictures. have you ever seen one?” “…. you mean a movie? the tvs not even on.” - polonius and hamlet

“ophelia! you stay here and read this fanfiction. he’ll think you’re all alone.” - gertrude

*hamlet starts his famous monologue* “not this emo shit again” - polonius

“please just take your monster tab necklace back… it’s sticky.” - ophelia

“hah! that stain on the couch looks like a camel.” - hamlet

“i’m actually sending hamlet to [rival school] to be put to death. that way he’ll stop being such a little dickhead.” - claudius

“look at these two men! this is claudius and this is your husband!” *holds up a picture of handsome squidward and willy shakes* - hamlet

“great i’m going to have to kill you. this is my mob, by the way.” - laertes

“here lies the poor, dead, super dead, ophelia.” “babe! no! babe! aw fuck, the fair ophelia!” - hamlet at the funeral

“funeral costs are so expensive. *to the camera guy* how much are the royalties on this?” - horatio

#the target audience for this is so small and yet i couldn’t help myself #hamlet #i was funnier at 17 than i will ever be #also i played laertes in case you were wondering

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whereismymonsterlover · 9 months ago

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I have made a lot of false promises *COUGH* robin dress redesign *COUGH* but here you are: a oneshot!! a finished one, too.

I'm a little hyped I won't lie. I think it's really cool lmao. Chronically inhuman Sebastian and CPTSD Ciel let's go! Read it under the cut if you like.

Dinner that evening was held on the terrace overlooking the Phantomhive gardens in full summer’s bloom. On one end of the table, the grey-haired boy leant with the bottom of his palm fitted firmly in his soft cheek, further deforming his scowl when told, “Sebastian is very good to you, isn’t he?”

Sebastian had left Ciel and his guest to fetch the main course. Ciel could only guess it was the systematic delivery of little appetisers (egg and onion pastry rolls) that spurred his dinnermate to make such a sickly endearing comment. Compliments on Phantomhive hospitality should hardly reflect on the help itself, and certainly shouldn’t reflect on the help’s relationship with their employer. The boy thought for a while, considered sitting taller and taking his elbow off the table but got hot when he realised, with the pressure he had been applying, there would surely be a big red mark on his face now. Subtly, he eased up on his palm but didn’t move his hand. Dinner’s guest that night was Mr Marcel, a class event manager who’d worked with Funtom since near its conception. Ciel wondered still: his favourite quality about the man was his dispassionate, business-lead mind. Marcel never cared to swap personal affairs if it didn’t concern putting on a good showcase and watching stock charts rise. This was uncharacteristic, but Ciel found this was typical when people had watched Sebastian’s allure for too long. Like those before him, Mr Marcel was mistaking his small glimpses of the 4-year commitment as real love. The recurring delusion that only Ciel could see past made him want to scream the truth, but then Mr Marcel would be killed, and he was too skilled a manager for Funtom to lose.

Ciel ground some remaining pastry between his teeth before playing up the scowl, adding a campiness to the way he slouched and held his head in his hand, elbow still on the table. Act like how a bitter son hates his father, get a laugh out of it and finish this horrid topic. Like how a bitter son hates his father…what a sick joke.

“Mr Marcel, have you ever heard of the mythical disease choreomania?” Ciel may as well have a little fun with the act. Despite a resume filled with playhouses, the man had no interest in theatrics and fantastical stories so Ciel knew this game was safe to play. Marcel wasn’t the type to think on hidden poetics nor was he compassionate enough to be a martyr if he did.

Marcel patted away the pastry flecks in his white moustache with the serviette and mirrored the casual air by planting his elbows on the table and interlinking his fingers. Ciel felt a little better. It was like Marcel’s white moustache spoke for him with the way it flared up and down with every syllable. “Mmm… No, I have not.”

A single eye flickered to the terrace doors. Clear…”There are tales of an affliction that could wipe out entire villages in the old times. It wasn’t like an ordinary plague but a kind of madness that would subject the villagers to days of dancing.” The corner of Ciel’s mouth pulled tight, gazing across the table with humour now. Marcel blinked (as did his moustache) before the tense expression he used to listen intently with broke out in a gruff and hearty laugh. It was short and polite but Ciel knew he was tickled.

Marcel fidgeted with his cravat as his laughter settled and leant over with his big pigeon chest. “Maybe these ‘old times’ aren’t so far behind us, Earl. Were you to build with every ballroom I have had to plan, you would have a castle.”

Ciel smiled shortly and continued. “The madness spread the moment you heard the music and before long, entire villages were dancing. The people’s bones would grind themselves short and the swinging of their heads would melt their brains. They couldn’t stop before they all dropped dead. They say it was a curse delivered by witches, demons… So yes, Sebastian could be worse.” Mr Marcel scoffed lightly and Ciel felt his cheek was cool enough for him to remove his hand without embarrassment. He sat up and reached for another eggroll, dropping his gaze to finish casually. Sebastian would return soon. “That is to say, I do get nervous when he forces ball dance and violin lessons on me. Says they’re necessary areas of education for someone of my standing, but I’m not entirely convinced…”

That made Mr Marcel bubble up again with the fuller, heartier laugh Ciel was looking for and, like clockwork, Sebastian returned with two covered dinner plates and Bard in tow holding the meal’s matching wine. Marcel moved his elbows off the table and laid his hands in his lap in preparation, smiling and flicking his eyebrows up cheekily past Sebastian as his dish was set down. Ciel returned the cheek and quickly finished off the egg roll to hide his smirk.

To the Head of the table, Sebastian gave a private, equally amused look of his own. Ciel could scream.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

It was night and a forest lit up with the torches of burning thatch roofs. The flames reached the tree canopy and waltzed to the music below. Strings were plucked with raw, bleeding bones and a percussion of hollow skulls thumped against each other. A choir of cackles and croons blared from the village people, dancing on their neighbours who couldn’t last as long. Ropes of pitch-dark mist slunk between the minds and souls of the villagers, their gyrating growing more frantic as the magic pierced them. All at once, the remaining dancers stopped dead as their joints seemed to lock with an echoing crack before the bodies thudded to the ground. The flames were swallowed in a grandiose veil of that same black matter, plunging the horrific scene into darkness.

“Young Master.” That pale devil’s face suddenly swamped Ciel’s vision with teeth and eyes and slime. He reached for the derringer beneath his pillow and thrust it… through the scene. It slunk back and dispersed into the dark of his peripheral and Sebastian, standing at a much more comfortable distance, held a candlestick at the end of the bed. Ciel still shook from his thrashing heartbeat and pivoted the derringer to where Sebastian really was. Just for a second, just to calm himself.

The black-clad butler came closer with that solemn expression he used when Ciel was being erratic. His eyebrows did not point wickedly downwards in ridicule or malice, it was just Sebastian remembering to blink and occasionally cooing at the boy, “Young Master, you’ve had a nightmare.” When his foggy mind began to clear, Ciel slowly started to believe him so he lowered the derringer and waited for his breathing to slow. He shifted on the mattress and unwrapped the duvet that had tangled around his body, no doubt from thrashing in his sleep. Sebastian reached closer to set the candlestick on the bedside table but those three burning wicks were so threatening Ciel couldn’t stop a yelp as he shuffled back against the headboard.

“Keep it away!” They locked eyes and Sebastian remembered to blink as he stepped back, letting his footfalls be heard. Instead, he set down the candlestick on the window sill with a familiar cracking noise that made Ciel flinch. Despite the distant light leaving Ciel in darkness, it was somehow better. Without a word, Sebastian moved casually into Ciel’s dark space to pull the duvet neat and tidy over the boy. Ciel could scream but he felt his throat was already sore. He must have screamed in his sleep too. He coughed, “Warm milk with honey.”

“Of course, my Lord,” Sebastian assured in his softest voice. “Will you be alright alone-” Ciel cut him off with a curt “yes” and Sebastian was gone with a bow.

Eyeing the candles, Ciel shoved the derringer back under his pillow, creasing it awkwardly. Sebastian would fix it when he returned.

#kuroshitsuji #black butler #fanfiction #ciel phantomhive #sebastian michaelis #writing

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ciaossu-imagines · 5 months ago

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Lance Oak Headcanons

Of course, we all know that Lance is really into astrology and fortune telling. He puts a lot of stock into it and tends to trust his daily horoscope, which he checks religiously. However, I think he memorizes the birthday’s of all his loved ones, not just because their birthdays are important to him, but also to learn their star signs. He uses this knowledge not only to check their horoscopes (and warn them about anything he feels is serious enough in the horoscope to merit mentioning) but to check the compatibility of their star signs. I think that, in terms of close friendships and potential love interests, Lance would view star sign compatibility as a pretty big deal, though it’s not his only decider, of course. I think he even studies and learns how to make birth-charts within astrology and how to use them not only to read people but to predict things, though he feels he’s not strong at the later.

Going along with this, though I still headcanon him as being religious in modern-day AU’s, I think he’d also have a marked interest in more ‘occult’ things, such as palmistry, tarot readings, crystals, chakras, and religions such as Wicca. His interest isn’t enough to override his own religious beliefs, but he’s definitely interested in learning and tries to keep a very open mind about things like that.

Lance really loves to dance and knows most formal and ballroom style dances. In more modern-day AU’s, I headcanon him as being a trained ballet dancer from the time he was young and also believe that he would have gained an interest in, learned, and competed as a figure skater. He’s constantly looking for dance classes as his main form of exercise and is open to learning almost all styles of dance. He’s got quite a bit of natural talent and grace. He’s always very considerate of any dance partners he has – while he definitely wants to shine, he does everything he can to make his dance partner look as lovely and as graceful as he is.

While we don’t often get to see Lance physically fighting in the manga, I do think that a lot of his physical fighting uses that gracefulness and love of dance of his. I think it would fall in line and look quite similar to capoeira or would at least pull elements from that.

Lance has a love of all things beautiful. That extends to his own beauty, which he protects and nurtures, but he’s also quick to spot the beauty in other people, both inner and outer. There’s very few beings, to Lance, who are truly ugly, without any little tidbit of beauty. This extends to both inner and outer beauty – he’s quick to see and grasp people’s inner beauty but even for people who aren’t conventionally attractive, he’s able to find some charming point about their physical appearance. If they seem in need of a confidence boost, Lance isn’t shy about giving compliments on these bits of beauty he sees in others.

Lance can be quite vain. He takes a lot of pains with his own appearance, taking care of himself physically, staying in shape, treating his skin and hair well and taking pains to keep them healthy, shiny, and beautiful. He’s learned enough from Labrador to have tried, tested, and perfected natural recipes for shampoo, conditioner, soaps, lotions, and other various skin and hair-care products. The toiletries that the church currently uses are Lance originals and have a light floral scent from the flowers in Labrador’s greenhouse.

That love of beauty that marks Lance’s personality extends to a love of art. He has a real appreciation and interest for artwork in all its mediums and can normally find a compliment for any artwork made. He’s got a natural affinity for and eye for colour, shape, movement, and such and natural artistic talents of his own. He’s never tied down to any one medium though, always wanting to experiment with something new.

He also embraces that ‘try something new’ instinct with all other things in his life. While he might not seem the type, Lance is someone who is or would be attracted to extreme sports. He’s got a huge bucket list of things he wants to try and things like cliff-diving, skydiving, bungee jumping, white-water rafting, and things of the like would be on that list. He’s also someone who really loves to travel and experience new cultures and traditions, diving headfirst into each and every new experience he could have.

Lance cannot read a map to save his life but he’s too proud to admit this. He has a horrible sense of direction too, but since he doesn’t mind that, he doesn’t get why other people would. After all, the journey is more important than the destination in his mind, so it should be that way for everyone else.

While Lance has some skills as a teacher and really cares deeply about seeing people succeed and live the fullest life that they can, he’s a little sadistic in his teaching methods. While he won’t let anything actually hurt his pupils or those under his care, he believes in very hands-on learning, making them face scary things themselves, making them go through hard challenges, making them try all kinds of things that might make them feel uncomfortable, worried, upset, or even terrified. He'll be there to protect them, but he truly believes that people need to do things on their own to truly learn and grow.

#unrequested posts #07-ghost #07 ghost #headcanons #bishop lance #lance 07 ghost #lance oak

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axelpvtmkt · 1 year ago

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Advanced Tips and Tricks for Global Market Trading

Trading in the global market can be both exciting and profitable if you employ the right strategies. Whether you're dealing with Forex, commodities, or other investments, these advanced tips will set you up for success.

Master Technical Analysis: Technical analysis is crucial for predicting market movements. Learn to read charts and use indicators like the Relative Strength Index (RSI) and Moving Average Convergence Divergence (MACD). These tools help you identify trends and make informed trading decisions.

Choose the Best Trading Platform: Selecting the right trading platform is essential. Look for platforms that offer real-time data, analytical tools, and a user-friendly interface. Good platforms also provide educational resources and excellent customer support.

Diversify Your Investments: Diversification reduces risk. Spread your investments across different asset classes like Forex, commodities, and stocks. This approach ensures that your portfolio is protected from market volatility.

Stay Updated with Market News: Keeping up with global news, economic events, and market trends is vital. Regularly read financial news and reports. Use economic calendars to track important events that might impact your trades.

Implement Risk Management Strategies: Effective risk management is key to long-term success. Use stop-loss orders to limit potential losses and ensure no single trade can hurt your portfolio too much. This way, you can trade with confidence.

Follow Expert Insights: Industry experts and analysts provide valuable insights. Platforms like TradingView and social media channels can offer advanced strategies and techniques. Learning from these experts can enhance your trading approach.

Use Automated Trading Systems: Automated trading systems can execute trades based on pre-set criteria, helping you take advantage of market opportunities without constant monitoring. Understand the algorithms and monitor their performance regularly.

Focus on Continuous Learning: The trading world is always changing. Participate in webinars, attend workshops, and take online courses to stay updated with the latest strategies and trends. Continuous learning helps you stay ahead.

Monitor Your Performance: Regularly review your trades and performance. Keep a trading journal to track your decisions, outcomes, and lessons learned. This practice helps you improve your strategies and avoid repeating mistakes.

Partner with Reliable Brokers: Choosing a reliable broker is crucial. Look for brokers with competitive spreads, low fees, and robust security measures. A good broker provides the tools and support you need for successful trading.

Trust APM for more expert insights and trading solutions.

#trading platform #forex

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mit · 2 years ago

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Teen uses calculus learned through MITx to better understand his cancer treatment

High schooler Dustin Liang estimated his blood cell counts by applying knowledge from an MITx course and talking to doctors.

Sara Feijo | MIT Open Learning

When Dustin Liang was diagnosed with T-cell acute lymphoblastic leukemia in June, the cancer consumed his life. But despite a monthlong hospital stay, aggressive chemotherapy treatments, and ongoing headaches, fatigue, loss of appetite, and nausea, the 17-year-old high school senior enrolled in MITx’s class 18.01.1x (Calculus 1A: Differentiation).

MITx, part of MIT Open Learning, offers hundreds of high-quality massive open online courses adapted from the MIT classroom for learners worldwide. The Calculus 1A: Differentiation course was designed and created by the Department of Mathematics and offered through the MITx program. Liang took the free course this summer in between treatment sessions and medical tests so that he could meet the four-year math requirement to graduate from a Massachusetts high school — an arrangement he made with his school.

In class, Liang learned how to differentiate functions and how to make linear and quadratic approximations. He then applied this knowledge to estimate his blood cell counts. “I was in a hospital bed when I saw the doctor draw a graph of my neutrophils on a whiteboard, and I thought you could apply a quadratic approximation to it to estimate my blood cell counts at a certain time in the future,” Liang recalls. “I talked to the doctors about it, and they said it was a good idea but that they currently didn’t have the technology to do that.”

In Calculus 1A, Liang was learning how to predict the near future value of a function using linear or quadratic approximation methods. After seeing a doctor’s chart of his neutrophils, Liang hypothesized that he could use quadratic approximation to predict his neutrophil count.

“Given a series of points of the blood cell counts, a function can be modeled,” Liang explains. “So, predicting a future point not far away is mathematically feasible.”

Determined to test his idea, Liang called his mentor, Jiawen Sun, who works in a London security exchange firm as a trading analyst simulating and modeling stock market behavior. Sun helped Liang create a graph to estimate Liang’s neutrophil count at a certain time. When Liang compared the graph to his blood test results, he found that the math worked.

“I was able to predict the blood cell counts. It was a little off, but close enough,” Liang says. “There are some challenges in simulating the function of blood cells. However, the human blood cell counts turned out to be converging easier than the stock market to simulate.”

Keep reading.

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr!

#mathematics #calculus #learning #cancer #medicine

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diana--williams · 2 years ago

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All the things to do Alone, especially while living alone

Movies and Series

Create a morning routine and stick to it, fall into the rhythm of my days and feel cool doing it everyday

Have special moments on weekends, planning ahead something with others or by myself. Do movie marathons, parties, hobby classes, museum visits, and potlucks.

Decorate my room elaborately and making it very me

Have cleaning Sundays and feel very accomplished after finishing up

Dress up lazy fancy and have comfort evenings with good food, maybe wine/beer and an art film.

Write for hours and dance around after because I finished the wordcount.

Look out the window on clear nights and gaxe till I feel sleepy, then go sleep dreaming of starry nights and a warm someone.

Go on cute dates and hot dates, feel amazing getting ready for both.

Have videocalls with people living far on scehdules to stay in touch, make sheets and charts to keep track of my routines and information.

Read books untill my hands hurt, then switch positions and continue reading.

Take it slow and please myself, teasing it out and taking as long as I can.

Have sick days in bed with water by bedside and vegetable rasam soup to keep up my energy.

Keep stocks of chocolate and gobble a few pieces everytime I remember they exist.

Meal prep in advance by cutting up vegetables and boxing them up, and making other cuisines half way to ease my meal times.

Create a study-work routine and see the change in myself every few weeks.

Save up enough money to take vacations and go to concerts.

Pick up obscure hobbies and skills and improve them like there's no tomorrow.

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stockmarketinstitute01 · 1 hour ago

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ICFM Offers India’s Best Stock Market Course With Real-Time Training, Strategy Building, and Practical Market Exposure

Learn Stock Market Trading With the Most Trusted Stock Market Course by ICFM

In today’s financial world, mastering the stock market is more than just an option—it’s a valuable life skill. With increasing interest among youth, working professionals, and even homemakers in building financial independence, the demand for a structured and practical stock market course has grown significantly. If you're looking for quality education and live market exposure, then ICFM - Stock Market Institute is the only name you need to trust.

ICFM is recognized across India as a specialized institute providing expert-led training in the field of stock trading and investment. Their stock market course is tailored for the Indian financial landscape, combining theoretical learning with hands-on practice. Whether you're a beginner or someone looking to refine your trading strategies, ICFM’s detailed and result-driven stock market course offers exactly what you need to become confident in trading and investing.

Why ICFM Is the Best Choice for a Stock Market Course

While many institutions claim to offer market training, ICFM stands out for its deep commitment to real-world education. The stock market course provided by ICFM focuses not just on concepts, but on practical implementation. You won’t just read about how the markets work—you’ll experience it first-hand.

ICFM’s faculty includes full-time market professionals who bring years of trading experience into the classroom. This gives learners the opportunity to study from experts who’ve seen bull markets, crashes, and everything in between. Their insights and mentorship make ICFM’s stock market course both insightful and actionable.

The institute also ensures small class sizes for better interaction, personalized doubt resolution, and live analysis. Whether in-person at their Delhi campus or through their online sessions, students receive the same high-quality, practical education. This structured and immersive approach makes ICFM’s stock market course ideal for students, job seekers, freelancers, and entrepreneurs alike.

What You Will Learn in ICFM’s Stock Market Course

ICFM’s stock market course begins by laying a strong foundation. It introduces learners to how stock markets operate in India, the structure of NSE and BSE, the role of SEBI, and how trading accounts are opened and operated. This sets the groundwork for a deeper understanding of financial instruments.

Next comes technical analysis, one of the most critical parts of trading. Learners are trained to read price charts, understand candlestick patterns, and use indicators such as Moving Averages, RSI, MACD, and Bollinger Bands. ICFM’s stock market course makes these complex tools easy to understand and apply. Students also learn trend analysis and market psychology, enabling them to make informed trading decisions.

The course also covers fundamental analysis, which is essential for long-term investing. Participants are taught how to read balance sheets, analyze company performance, and use financial ratios to identify strong investment opportunities. This dual approach of technical and fundamental training makes ICFM’s stock market course comprehensive and practical.

For those interested in advanced trading, the course includes a section on Futures and Options. Here, students learn hedging strategies, option chain interpretation, and volatility-based strategies using real-time examples. These modules add depth to the course and equip learners to handle all segments of the stock market.

Real-Time Market Practice – A Key Feature of ICFM’s Training

One of the most powerful components of ICFM’s stock market course is its live market practice. Students don’t just learn from books or pre-recorded videos—they engage directly with the market during trading hours. This real-time exposure is what gives ICFM its unmatched credibility among learners.

With access to demo accounts, trading terminals, and charting tools like TradingView, learners practice every day under the guidance of experts. They analyze market movements, find trade setups, and apply their strategies while receiving feedback from mentors. This live trading model transforms students into skilled market participants.

ICFM also conducts regular trade reviews, case studies of past trades, and discussion sessions to help students learn from real-life examples. This hands-on learning approach makes ICFM’s stock market course the most practical training available in the country.

Who Can Benefit From ICFM’s Stock Market Course?

The beauty of ICFM’s stock market course lies in its accessibility. Whether you're a college student exploring career options, a working professional seeking a second income, a homemaker wanting to grow savings, or a retired individual managing investments—this course has something valuable for you.

You don’t need a finance background or technical skills to get started. ICFM simplifies every topic with relatable examples and step-by-step learning. Flexible class timings, weekend batches, and online options make it easy for anyone to join and benefit.

Even traders with some prior experience will find the advanced modules, live trade execution, and strategy building sections very useful. That’s why many learners choose ICFM’s stock market course as a long-term skill-building investment.

Certification, Career Opportunities, and Continuous Support

After completing the stock market course, students receive an industry-recognized certificate from ICFM - Stock Market Institute. This certification not only builds confidence but also adds credibility to one’s professional profile. Many students use this certificate to apply for trading-related roles at brokerage firms, advisory companies, and investment institutions.

ICFM also offers post-course career counseling, placement assistance, and resume development support. More importantly, students receive lifetime access to mentorship, webinars, and learning groups—ensuring they continue to grow and refine their skills over time.

This long-term learning ecosystem is what makes ICFM not just a training provider, but a trusted partner in your financial journey.

Conclusion: Enroll in ICFM’s Stock Market Course to Build a Profitable Future

Learning how to navigate the stock market is one of the most powerful ways to build financial independence. However, real success depends on practical training, expert mentorship, and disciplined strategy—things that only a professional institute can offer. ICFM - Stock Market Institute provides all of this and more through its focused, hands-on, and comprehensive stock market course.

If you're serious about mastering the stock market—whether for personal investing, part-time trading, or launching a career—ICFM is the right place to begin. With expert faculty, live market sessions, and an unmatched support system, ICFM’s stock market course will empower you to take charge of your financial future.

Enroll today and take the first step towards becoming a smart, skilled, and confident trader in the Indian stock market.Tools

Read more: https://www.icfmindia.com/blog/nse-stock-market-course-secrets-how-to-learn-succeed-grow-in-indias-share-market

Read more: https://www.icfmindia.com/blog/stock-market-courses-in-delhi-online-free-get-ahead-without-spending-a-rupee

#education #stock market courses #stock market #share market

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stockmarketvidhya · 6 hours ago

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Best Trading Classes Near Me for Beginners – Start Your Stock Market Journey with Stock Market Vidya

Are you searching for “Best trading classes near me for beginners”? Do you feel excited about the stock market but don’t know where to start? If yes, then this article will help you find the right direction – especially if you're from Nagpur or nearby.

Whether you're a student, working professional, housewife, or retired individual, Stock Market Vidya in Nagpur offers one of the most practical and easy-to-understand share market courses for complete beginners.

Why Beginners Need Proper Stock Market Training

The stock market is full of opportunities, but also full of risks if you don’t understand the basics. Many beginners directly jump into trading based on tips or social media without knowing what they’re doing – and end up losing money.

That’s why it’s important to start with the right education. A structured trading class can help you learn: ✅ How the stock market works ✅ How to invest safely ✅ How to do intraday and positional trading ✅ How to manage risk and protect your capital

But where should you join? Let’s talk about the best institute in Nagpur for beginners.

Stock Market Vidya – Trusted Name Since 2004

Located in Nagpur, Stock Market Vidya is one of the oldest and most experienced stock market training institutes in Central India.

Founded by Mr. Prashant Sarode, who has been active in the market since 2002, this institute has trained thousands of learners with one simple goal – make trading and investing easy for everyone.

What Makes Stock Market Vidya Perfect for Beginners?

1. Beginner-Friendly Course Structure

The share marketing course is specially designed for people who have zero knowledge of trading. You don’t need any background in finance or commerce.

Course is divided into 4 parts (4 weeks):

Week 1: Introduction, Basics, and Fundamental Analysis

Week 2: Derivative Concepts (Futures & Options)

Week 3: Technical Analysis (Charts, Indicators, Trends)

Week 4: Practical Trading, Risk Management, Strategy Building

Each topic is explained in simple Marathi-Hindi-English so everyone can understand easily.

2. Practical & Live Market Sessions

You will not just learn theory – you will also practice in the live stock market under expert guidance. This real-time exposure helps in building confidence and removing fear from trading.

3. Personal Attention from Expert Mentor

All sessions are guided by Mr. Prashant Sarode himself. He shares real-life examples, explains trading psychology, and gives personal attention to students. His 25+ years of experience helps beginners avoid common mistakes.

4. Flexible Learning Options – Online & Offline

Busy with college or job? No problem. Stock Market Vidya offers both stock marketing online and offline classes, so you can learn as per your convenience. Whether you are in Nagpur or outside, you can join the course easily.

5. Perfect for All Age Groups

This course is ideal for: 👨‍🎓 Students 👩‍💼 Working Professionals 👩 Housewives 👴 Retired Individuals

Even if you are completely new to the world of stock trading, this is a perfect starting point.

What You Will Learn in This Course – Summary

Here’s a complete overview of what you’ll gain from the course at Stock Market Vidya:

Stock Market Basics You will understand how the stock market functions, how to buy and sell shares, and how different segments like NSE, BSE, Sensex, and Nifty work.

Fundamental Analysis You’ll learn how to read and understand a company’s balance sheet, profit and loss statement, and cash flow reports. This helps you decide whether a company is worth investing in for the long term.

Derivatives (Futures & Options) Get clear knowledge about how Futures and Options work. You will learn how to trade in these instruments safely and use the option chain for better decision-making.

Technical Analysis Learn how to read price charts, understand candlestick patterns, and use technical indicators like Moving Averages, RSI, and MACD. These tools help you decide the right time to buy or sell.

Trading Strategies & Risk Management Discover practical trading methods and how to create your own trading strategy. You will also learn how to manage risk properly so that your capital is protected, even during market ups and downs.

Real Market Experience – Build Confidence from Day One

The best way to learn is by doing. At Stock Market Vidya, you will be trained using real charts, real market data, and get hands-on experience during live market hours. This helps you apply your knowledge practically and learn faster.

Admission Eligibility

✅ Anyone above 18 years of age can join ✅ No background in finance required ✅ Just basic computer or mobile knowledge is enough

Final Words – Learn Trading the Right Way

If you have been searching "best trading classes near me for beginners", then Stock Market Vidya in Nagpur is the right place to start. With structured learning, personal guidance, and practical exposure, this institute will give you a strong foundation to enter the world of trading and investment.

📞 Want to know more or join the course?

Visit: https://stockmarketvidya.com

Here are 10 detailed FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions) for your blog post “Best Trading Classes Near Me for Beginners – Stock Market Vidya”, written in a friendly and informative tone to help readers get more clarity:

FAQs – Best Trading Classes for Beginners at Stock Market Vidya

1. Who can join the trading course at Stock Market Vidya?

Anyone above 18 years of age can join. Whether you're a student, working professional, housewife, or retired person, this course is designed in simple language so that beginners from all backgrounds can learn easily.

2. Do I need any prior knowledge of stock market or finance?

No, you do not need any prior experience or knowledge. The course starts from the basics and gradually moves to advanced topics. Even if you’ve never opened a demat account before, you can start here.

3. Is the stock market course available in Hindi or English?

Yes, the stock market course is taught in a simple mix of Marathi, Hindi and English, so that everyone can understand without any difficulty. Technical words are explained in easy language.

4. Are the classes available online?

Yes, Stock Market Vidya offers both share market online and offline classes. If you are outside Nagpur or prefer learning from home, you can easily attend the online sessions from your mobile or laptop.

5. Will I get practical share market training or only theory?

You will get both theory and practical training. One of the best parts of this course is the share market live market practice, where you apply what you learn in real-time during market hours.

6. Who will be teaching the course?

The course is conducted by Mr. Prashant Sarode, a stock market expert with over 25 years of real market experience. He personally trains students and provides practical insights, strategies, and trading discipline tips.

7. How long is the course duration?

The course is structured for 1 month and divided into 4 weekly modules. Each week covers different important topics like basics, derivatives, technical analysis, and trading strategies.

8. What topics are covered in this course?

The course covers:

Stock market basics

Fundamental and technical analysis

Futures and options

Trading strategies

Risk management

Trading psychology Everything a beginner needs to start trading with confidence.

9. Will I get any support after the course ends?

Yes, Stock Market Vidya provides after-course support to help you stay updated and confident in your learning journey. You can stay connected for guidance even after completing your training.

10. How can I register for the course?

You can register by visiting the official website: https://stockmarketvidya.com. You can also call or WhatsApp (9822718163) them directly for batch timings, fee details, and seat availability.

#share market courses #stock market Classes #stock market classes near me #stock trading classes near me

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profitmax-academy · 8 hours ago

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Searching for a Home-Based Income? Choose ProfitMax Share Trading Courses in Pune to Get Started

In the modern dynamic business world, a home-based income is no longer a luxury; it is a must. When considering taking a departure from your typical 9-to-5 and looking toward the possibility of becoming a successful stock market trader working out of your own home office, there is no better way to get started than with ProfitMax Share Trading Courses Pune. Our carefully crafted curricula enable budding traders to generate veritable and long-term revenue right in the confines of his/her residence.

The reason why Share Trading is the ultimate home-based income stream.

The stock market is very promising to anyone who has the knowledge and tools. Marketing, client acquisition, and unlimited content creation are part of the set of options in other types of remote income-generation opportunities; trading is the only one where you can create an income source based on skill and strategy.

ProfitMax will impart to you the fundamental knowledge, the technical formulas, and psychology training such that you can become a confident, competent trader. Trying to earn some money on the side or to turn a full-time opportunity, our classes create a great base for achieving financial freedom.

Who Can Benefit from ProfitMax Share Trading Courses in Pune?

Our programs are tailored for a wide spectrum of learners:

Beginners who want to understand stock market basics

Home-makers looking to earn from home

Students aiming to build early financial literacy

Retired individuals seeking a profitable pastime

Professionals seeking passive income options

With no prior experience required, anyone with dedication and discipline can thrive through our expertly crafted training modules.

Real-life oriented Course Curriculum Resulting in Success

We at ProfitMax realize that we need more than theory. This is why we base our curriculum on doable strategies. Here is a look at what our share trading course in Pune offers:

1. Basics of the Stock Market

Induction into equity, derivatives, and commodities

Learning the details of the stock markets (NSE, BSE)

Trading or investing?

2. Technical Analysis

Reading charts and interpretation

Candlesticks tool patterns and signals

Action on price strategies

Support and resistance level

3. Fundamental Analysis

Analysing the company balance sheets

Learning about P / E ratios, EPS and ROE

Market trend and macroeconomic indicators analysis

4. Trading Psychology

Control and emotional stability

Risk-reward management

Losses and consistency management

5. Practice of live market

Trading real time scenarios

Coached training with recognize traders

• Practical knowledge of modelling tools

Advantages of entering the ProfitMax Share Trading Courses

100 percent Home-Based Learning

We also offer online programs, featuring live sessions, video recordings, and a mentor to guide you through the course. You can complete it at your own pace and from the comfort of your own home.

Eternal access and maintenance

As soon as you are enrolled, you become part of the ProfitMax family. Our access to up-to-date material, group discussions, and support of experienced professionals is lifetime.

Discover Cutthroat Profitable techniques.

Our professionals do not only provide education, but they also trade. All the strategies we offer have all been tested in the real world, and they have delivered in real markets.

🛠️ Tools & Resources Included

Gain access to exclusive tools like:

Trading View and charting tutorials

Watchlists and stock screeners

Daily trading calls and mentorship

We believe in delivering more value than we promise, and that’s exactly what our student’s experience.

Adjustable Courses customized to Your Career Aims

No matter what your interest is in intraday trading, positional trading or long-term investing, we have specific modules that would fit in your income objectives. Our professionalism will not have you lose or overburdened even when you do not know a little bit about the stock market.

Low-cost Learning with High ROI

We are of the opinion that financial education must be available. We have made our course fees affordable yet of good service. We do not leave anyone behind by offering many study plans (weekly payment plans, student offers, and women-learners scholarships).How to Get Started Today

Start is simple, there is no mess:

1. Go to the official site or get in touch with our center in Pune

2. Select a course that suits you in time and objectives

3. Register today to gain access to study resources.

4. Learn, Practice, and Earn at your own pace

The stock market is not about experts in the market- it is about educated decision-makers. Anyone can develop a reliable home-based income by following the right mentorship and tools and not worrying about office politicking, boss bullying, and commute distress.

Don’t wait for the “right time”—create your time with ProfitMax. Because “it’s time to earn money”

Click here for more details: profitmaxacademy.com/about-us/

#share trading courses pune #best share trading courses pune #profitmax share trading courses

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agssl01 · 19 hours ago

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Calculating CAGR Online and Mastering Trading: A Comprehensive Guide

In the fast-paced world of finance, understanding key investment metrics and mastering trading strategies are essential for both beginners and seasoned investors. Whether you're aiming to evaluate your investment growth or explore new opportunities like IPOs, leveraging online tools and knowledge can significantly enhance your financial journey. This article explores how to calculate CAGR online, master trading techniques, utilize a stock SIP calculator, and effectively apply for IPOs.

Calculating CAGR Online: Simplifying Investment Growth Measurement

The Compound Annual Growth Rate (CAGR) is a crucial metric that indicates the mean annual return of an investment over a specified period, assuming profits are reinvested. Traditionally, calculating CAGR involved manual computations, which could be cumbersome and prone to errors. However, with the advent of online tools, investors can now effortlessly determine CAGR through user-friendly websites.

How to Calculate CAGR Online

Choose a Reliable Platform: Platforms like Investopedia, Moneycontrol, or financial calculators such as Financial Calculators offer free calculating cagr online.

Input Required Data: Typically, you'll need the initial value of your investment, the final value, and the investment duration in years.

Get Instant Results: The calculator instantly computes the CAGR, providing you with a clear picture of your investment’s growth rate.

Benefits of Using Online CAGR Calculators

Accuracy: Minimize calculation errors.

Time-Saving: Obtain results within seconds.

Comparison: Easily compare different investments or portfolios.

Mastering how to calculate CAGR online empowers investors to assess the performance of their investments accurately, aiding in better decision-making.

Mastering Trading: Strategies for Success

Trading involves buying and selling financial instruments to generate profits. Mastering trading requires a combination of technical knowledge, strategic planning, and emotional discipline. Here are some foundational tips:

Educate Yourself: Understand market basics, trading terminologies, and different asset classes like stocks, commodities, and forex.

Develop a Trading Plan: Define your risk appetite, preferred trading hours, and profit targets.

Use Technical and Fundamental Analysis: Technical analysis involves reading charts and patterns, while fundamental analysis assesses economic indicators and company health.

Practice with Demo Accounts: Many platforms offer virtual trading environments where you can hone your skills without risking real money.

Stay Updated: Keep abreast of market news, geopolitical events, and economic releases affecting asset prices.

Leverage Online Trading Platforms: Websites like Zerodha, Upstox, and Interactive Brokers offer advanced tools for analysis and execution.

Stock SIP Calculator: Planning Systematic Investments

A stock SIP calculator helps investors plan systematic investments in stocks or mutual funds. It estimates the future value of regular investments based on expected returns, allowing for disciplined investing and wealth accumulation.

Using a stock SIP calculator involves entering the monthly investment amount, expected annual return, and investment tenure. The tool then displays the projected corpus at the end of the period, aiding investors in setting realistic financial goals.

How to Apply for IPO: Navigating the Process

Initial Public Offerings (IPOs) offer investors a chance to buy shares of a company before they are listed on stock exchanges. How to apply for ipo Applying for IPOs can be lucrative but involves a systematic process:

Open a Demat and Trading Account: Ensure you have an active account with a SEBI-registered broker.

Research the IPO: Read the prospectus thoroughly to understand the company's financial health, business model, and use of funds.

Check Eligibility: Most IPOs require investors to meet certain criteria, such as minimum investment amounts and KYC verification.

Place the Bid: During the IPO window, log into your trading account and fill out the bid form with the number of shares and bid price.

Apply via ASBA or UPI: Many IPOs now accept applications through the ASBA process (Application Supported by Blocked Amount) or via UPI, making the process seamless.

Allotment and Listing: After the allotment process, successful applicants receive shares in their Demat accounts. The stock then begins trading on the stock exchange.

Conclusion

Mastering key financial concepts and processes like calculating CAGR online and mastering trading can significantly enhance your investment outcomes. Additionally, tools like the stock SIP calculator enable disciplined wealth building, while understanding the IPO application process opens doors to early-stage investment opportunities.

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stockmarketinstittute · 1 day ago

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Master the Markets with ICFM's Algo Trading Course Now

In today’s fast-paced financial markets, trading is no longer just about reading charts or following trends manually. Technology has transformed how professionals participate in the stock market—and Algorithmic Trading, or Algo Trading, sits at the forefront of this revolution. For aspiring traders and finance professionals in India, ICFM INDIA offers a specialized Algo Trading Course that delivers everything you need to understand, build, and apply automated trading strategies in real-world markets.

As one of the few institutions offering a truly practical algo trading education, ICFM INDIA ensures that students not only learn theory but also gain the skills to code, test, and deploy their own trading algorithms. Whether you're a beginner wanting to understand the fundamentals or a trader aiming to automate your existing strategies, this course is your pathway to becoming a modern-day market expert.

Why Algo Trading Is the Future of Financial Markets

Algorithmic trading is the use of pre-programmed instructions or mathematical models to execute trades at high speed and volume. This system-based trading eliminates human errors, enhances efficiency, and helps in capitalizing on market opportunities within milliseconds—something manual traders can’t match.

Today, over 70% of trading volumes in developed markets like the U.S. and Europe are driven by algorithms. Even in India, algo trading is growing rapidly as brokers, institutions, and individual traders adopt it for intraday, arbitrage, and swing strategies. For anyone serious about a future in finance or trading, understanding algo systems is no longer optional—it's essential.

The Algo Trading Course by ICFM INDIA prepares students to thrive in this new landscape by equipping them with technical knowledge, practical coding skills, and a deep understanding of market dynamics.

ICFM INDIA – Leading the Way in Practical Financial Education

Known for offering highly specialized stock market and trading programs, ICFM INDIA has earned its reputation through quality instruction, hands-on training, and market-relevant course design. The Algo Trading Course is no different—it is developed by real traders and quants who use algorithmic systems daily and understand what works in real-time conditions.

The course provides a mix of financial theory, coding fundamentals, and strategy development, taught through a blend of live classes, assignments, backtesting sessions, and live market exposure. What makes ICFM INDIA unique is its ability to break down complex topics into simple, actionable knowledge—even for those who don’t have a programming background.

What You Will Learn in the Algo Trading Course

The Algo Trading Course by ICFM INDIA is structured to take you from zero to advanced skill level in a gradual, methodical manner. The curriculum begins with the fundamentals of algorithmic thinking and evolves into strategy creation, coding, and automation. You’ll gain a solid grip over:

Market microstructure and algorithmic trade mechanics

Introduction to trading strategies like trend-following, arbitrage, and scalping

Basics of programming in Python (or other relevant languages)

Using APIs for order execution and market data feeds

Building backtesting systems to validate strategies

Deploying trading algorithms on live platforms

Risk management, slippage control, and compliance with SEBI guidelines

By the end of the course, you’ll be able to conceptualize, code, test, and execute your own algo strategies confidently in a live market.

Hands-On Practice: The Core of ICFM INDIA’s Teaching Model

Theory alone isn’t enough when it comes to algorithmic trading. What truly sets ICFM INDIA apart is its practical, live-market teaching style. Throughout the Algo Trading Course, students get access to simulated and real trading environments where they can run their strategies, test results, and understand execution in real time.

Live backtesting, debugging sessions, and strategy review meetings are part of the course experience. Students also work on capstone projects where they design complete algo models from scratch—giving them an edge when applying for jobs or trading independently.

This kind of immersive, interactive learning ensures you aren’t just learning code—you’re building tools that actually work in financial markets.

Who Should Enroll in the Algo Trading Course?

This Algo Trading Course is ideal for:

Stock market traders looking to automate their strategies

Students pursuing careers in finance, data science, or investment banking

Professionals working in brokerages, hedge funds, or prop trading firms

Engineers and coders interested in applying skills to financial markets

Anyone eager to learn Python and its application in real-world trading

You don’t need prior coding experience. The course includes a complete programming introduction that prepares you from the ground up.

Career Opportunities After Completing the Course

Algo trading is a high-demand skill set in modern finance. After completing the Algo Trading Course from ICFM INDIA, students unlock multiple career paths, such as:

Quantitative analyst

Algorithmic trader

Strategy developer

Data scientist in finance

Proprietary trading firm associate

Many students also use the skills gained to start freelancing as algo developers, launch their own trading systems, or trade professionally with reduced manual effort.

ICFM INDIA’s certificate adds significant weight to your resume and is recognized by employers seeking candidates with real-world algo trading expertise.

Certification and Job Readiness

Upon completing the course, students receive an industry-recognized Certification in Algo Trading from ICFM INDIA. This certificate demonstrates that you’ve mastered core concepts of algorithmic trading, can build your own strategies, and understand how to implement them in compliance with market regulations.

It gives you a competitive edge whether you're applying for technical finance roles, internships, or want to showcase your knowledge to clients and recruiters.

Flexible Learning Options – Online and Offline Formats

ICFM INDIA offers the Algo Trading Course in both classroom and online formats to meet the needs of working professionals, students, and part-time learners. Both formats include:

Live interactive sessions with mentors

Recorded lessons for revision

Doubt-clearing sessions

Real-time coding assignments

Access to trading and backtesting platforms

Whether you join from home or at the ICFM learning center, the course ensures the same high-quality learning experience.

What Students Say About the Algo Trading Course

Many students have transformed their trading game through ICFM INDIA’s algo program. From engineering students who developed profitable bots to full-time traders who reduced losses and increased efficiency, the testimonials speak volumes.

Learners consistently praise the instructor support, real-world application, and the balance of finance and coding knowledge that ICFM INDIA delivers. These success stories show that with the right guidance, anyone can master algorithmic trading.

Algo Trading Course: Learn, Code, and Automate Your Trading Future with ICFM INDIA’s Practical Program

If you're serious about succeeding in today’s data-driven trading environment, manual trading won’t be enough. You need tools, systems, and skills that allow you to react faster and smarter than the market. That’s exactly what ICFM INDIA’s Algo Trading Course delivers.

With real trading examples, interactive classes, coding support, and placement-ready skills, this course is your launchpad into the world of algorithmic finance. It bridges the gap between financial theory and real execution—giving you the power to trade like the pros.

Read more blogs - https://www.icfmindia.com/blog/nse-stock-market-course-secrets-how-to-learn-succeed-grow-in-indias-share-market

Read more blogs -https://www.icfmindia.com/blog/stock-market-courses-in-delhi-online-free-get-ahead-without-spending-a-rupee

#Algo Trading Course #Algo Trading course in Delhi

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