#The Clown of the Star-Spangled Banner

[inversionimpulse]

You are not a clown, you are the entire Touhou 紺珠伝　～ Legacy of Lunatic Kingdom

Stage 5 Sea of Tranquility

Pierrot of the Star-Spangled Banner

Clownish Moon

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

THE BIG SPLIT

TCinLA

The circus came to town in DC for the past four days and did a good job of displaying why the Republicans are in a lot of trouble.

The CPAC clown show, er, I mean shitshow, er, I mean conference, is proof of the difficulty the party will have in keeping their increasingly fractured coalition together for 2024.

A mere 40 years ago, the Republican Party was defined by overall ideological unity on three conservative principles: free markets, a muscular foreign policy and traditional social values.

Those three pillars were the heart of the Reagan revolution. No more.

The MAGA movement, which clearly took over this year's CPAC conference, has moved the party to a protectionist, populist, belligerent outlook. The one issue that appears to still unite the GOP is fighting "wokeness," which even former House speaker Paul Ryan - called a RINO last night and targeted for “removal” by Trump in his Nuremberg Rally speech - cited as his primary reason for continuing to support and be involved with Faux Snooze in a combative interview last week with his formr friend and ally, Charlie Sykes.

No more free markets. For the past year, companies such as Disney and PNC Bank that are proud to publicly showcase their commitment to progressive values that embrace diversity have come under attack, with Governor InSanity declaring he will control the content creatd by Disney to prevent further attacks of “wokeness” on good god-fearin’ patriotic Amurrikins.

What was once the “Party of Lawn Ordure” sees Fraternity Freddie, er, I mean Matt Gaetz, call for defunding the FBI, CIA and other intelligence agencies if they don't “get back on our side." The goobers at CPAC gave him a standing ovation. Vivek Ramaswamy, a venture capitalist and GOP presidential candidate issued a call for the FBI to be dismantled and replaced with something else.

Trump’s keynote address last night was two hours of a vengeful indictment of the GOP establishment: "We will expel the warmongers, we will drive out the globalists, we will cast out the communists, we will throw off the political class that hates our country. The Republican Party was ruled by freaks, neocons, open-border zealots and fools. We're never going back to the party of Paul Ryan, Karl Rove and Jeb Bush.” He then pledged to protect Social Security from any Republicans pursuing reduced benefits.

This from a former president and current leading presidential candidate of one of the two major political parties of this country, who pushes his political campaign with a “music video” that has the “J6 Prison Choir” - the convicted insurrectionists now in the DC jail - singing “The Star Spangled Banner” while he shouts the Pledge of Allegiance.

Can it get crazier?

Well, yes, since you ask, it can.

Friday night, Marjorie Traitor Goon targeted Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky in her speech, telling him to "leave your hands off of our sons and daughters." When asked about former Secretary of State Mike Pompeo and former U.N. Ambassador Nikki Haley, both unapologetic Ukraine hawks, Congresswoman Goon replied "I don't listen to Nikki Haley and I don't think she's going to do well in the primary."

The Goonbimbo is probably right.

For those who think Governor InSanity will be a threat to the Trump Party, a top Trump adviser said that the governor has "Reagan Republican" vulnerabilities the former president will exploit.

“Reagan Republicans” are now “the enemy” in the looney half of what passes for the Republican Party today.

Trump knows his audience: he dominated DeSantis in the CPAC straw poll, 62%-20%, and saw improvement from his 2022 numbers when he led DeSantis 59%-28%. “Trump has completely remade the party since he’s become president,” a Trump aide said. “He realized there’s a difference between what grassroots activists thought and what Bush Republicans in Washington, D.C., were trying to enact.”

"In 2016, I declared I am your voice. Today I add: I am your warrior. I am your justice, and for those who have been wronged and betrayed, I am your retribution. This is the final battle, they know it. I know it, you know it, and everybody knows it, this is it. Either they win or we win. And if they win, we no longer have a country." The neverwere’s, the neverwillbe’s, the lifetime losers, the Dilberts who know they’re the geniuses but no one will recognize them, they love this, this is why they support him. He’ll “get” all those people who pointed at them and snickered.

He also knows who the average wingnut moron is: a senile old white male boomer. "We're not going back to people that want to destroy our great social security system. Even some in our own party, I wonder who that might be. That want to raise the minimum age of social security to 70, 75 or even 80 in some cases, and then a route to cut Medicare to a level that it will no longer be recognizable."

“Get your government hands off my social security!” - the battle cry of the drunks in The Villages.

Two other declared GOP candidates, former South Carolina Gov. Nikki Haley and biotech entrepreneur Vivek Ramaswamy, garnered 3 and 1 percent of the vote respectively. Michigan businessman Perry Johnson, who ran a Super Bowl ad for his long-shot campaign for the GOP nomination came in third with 5% of the vote. Senators Rand Paul and Ted Cruz, along with former Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, each had 1% of the vote to round out the tally board.

The straw poll also found 79% of attendees oppose U.S. military aid to Ukraine, while 74% want abortion regulated on the state (not federal) level.

Basically, Trump is prioritizing the 30% of Republicans who consider themselves "Trump-first Republicans," leaving his rivals to compete for backing among the shrinking minority who support the party first.

Trump declared he would run even if he was indicted, and the goobers cheered him. he will, too.

If four or five others enter the race and divide up that 70% who aren’t “Trump first” among them, Trump ends up with a plurality win in most of the coming GOP winner-take-all primaries, just like he did in 2016. And in that 70%, most of them already also agree with the policies Trump is promoting. For anyone else to win, they will have to adopt Trumpism hook, line and sinker, whatever they want to call it.

This morning, “moderate” “sane Republican” former Maryland governor Larry Hogan announced he is NOT running for president in 2024.

The media and the political elites want to find Anything But Trump to write about, unless it is clown shows like this past weekend at CPAC. The fact is that even the people claiming to not be Trump, like Hikki Haley, cannot find anything they disagree with him on when asked by interviewers. They announce that they too are supportive of the most recent Idiot Thing among Republicans, the way Paul Ryan defended Fox because it is “anti-woke,” though even he couldn’t describe was “woke” is and why it should be opposed, when asked. Either all of this, or they want to prove they could out-Trump Trump, as DeSantis is attempting to do with his non-campaign campaign for president.

What we have witnessed and are witnessing is a Republican party on steroids to turn the latest fringe belief or activity into the next mainstream definer of the party. This is because this is now a party bereft of ideas, that likely won’t have a convention and write a platform in 2024 because they don’t have new ideas and know that their old ideas are unpopular; this is why they no longer believe in democracy. It is now a badge of belief in the party that the Jauary 6 insurrectionists are “persecuted political prisoners,” that the footage that has been shown of the insurrection is faked.

The Republican Party is whatever a mentally-deficient, un-educable, lifelong cheat and liar says it is whenever he opens his mouth and words come out. Two hours of mendacity; malevolence; revenge fantasy; willful, chosen ignorance; and free association broadcast last night is today what the Republican Party believes and is about.

Until the next time he lets words fall out of his mouth.

People have asked, how did it happen in Germany in the 1930s - this is how it happened then and is happening now.

[TCinLA :: Thats Another Fine Mess]

[lunapaper]

Album Review: 'Viva Las Vengeance' - Panic! At The Disco

Brendon Urie is one petty little bitch. 

Years later, the Panic! At The Disco frontman is still hung up on his former bandmates, Dallon Weekes and Ryan Ross, letting the salt run free on the band’s latest record, Viva Las Vengeance. 

‘Local God,’ the album’s fourth track, is Brendon at his most ugly and bitter, delivering backhanded lines like ‘You'll live forever as a local God/It's even better than the thing you're not,’ as if he’s condescendingly patting Ryan and Dallon on the head whilst assuring them ‘It’s okay, guys! At least you still got Open Mic Night at that shitty dive bar by the highway! Oh, by the way, did you see me melting faces off at the Bellagio the other night?’ He also can’t help but rub it in how ‘It's 2021 and I'm almost famous,’ simultaneously downplaying his fame and thirsting for more. 

It’s quite ironic telling Ryan and Dallon that they had so many chances to become superstars when Brendon spends a significant chunk of Viva Las Vengeance looking back on his glory days in Vegas and complaining about the price of fame (the latter a common theme since the release of 2016’s Death of a Bachelor). 

On ‘Star-Spangled Banner,’ he recalls playing Liberace’s piano at a house party and getting a lip ring down at the mall with Katie and Brittany. ‘I thought that I had friends, I thought I even liked them/But now I'm thinkin' maybe not so much,’ he muses on the aptly-titled ‘Sad Clown, ‘I hit the spacebar, I cannot play guitar,’ popping happy pills while scrolling through hate tweets (or as the rest of us call it, ‘valid criticism’).  

But that’s about as much self-reflection as you’re gonna get on Viva Las Vengeance. This is such a strange record; so delusional and filled with such undeserved ego from Brendon, even outright defensive at times. The production value is cheesy and overblown, hell-bent on being as obnoxious as fucking possible. Each song sounds as repetitive as the last, with Brendon shamelessly ripping off his idols under the guise of homage. 

‘God Killed Rock and Roll’ is a blatant Queen rip-off even by Brendon’s standards. The Bohemian Rhapsody hype is over, can we just let it go already?? (The film wasn’t even good!) Although it’s just in time for the Elvis biopic hype, I guess, judging by Brendon’s goofy impression in the pre-chorus. 

‘Sugar Soaker’ is like the dinner theatre version of a Grease track, coated in a thick layer of chintzy pop grease. ‘All By Yourself’ obviously interpolates Eric Carmen’s 1975 classic, turning it into one of those emotionally manipulative underdog anthems as if Brendon really gives a shit whether you dyed your hair pink to piss off Mum and Dad or got your arse kicked at school by Chad and his gaggle of jocks. Brendon stopped being the underdog the moment he decided to turn Ryan Ross’ creative vision into a soulless pop factory, churning out total dogshit. 

‘Star-Spangled Banner,’ meanwhile, is quite possibly the worst song Panic! Has ever produced. It’s a two-for-one deal: A Queen and a Thin Lizzy rip-off! It sounds like the kind of shit Glee would’ve covered back in the day, probably in an episode about the Glee Club feeling like a bunch of freaks after nobody applauded their saccharine rendition of Lil Jon’s ‘Bend Ova’ during school assembly.  

And why does Brendon feel the need to belt every goddamn line on this record?? More often than not, he struggles to hit those high notes, which is just so painful to listen to. If Brendon keeps this up, he’s gonna have no voice left... 

Viva Las Vengeance also has the misfortune of featuring some of Brendon’s sleaziest lyrics yet. 

His makeup sex in the middle of a breakup is about as enticing as a kick to the nads. He calls his woman a ‘lil sugar soaker’ with ‘red tail lights in the back of her head,’ threatening to drive her till she’s dead. And I’m sure whatever’s left of Panic!’s fandom will have absolutely no problem with Brendon turning domestic abuse into a catchy pop track, encouraging Maggie to hit her boyfriend back... 

The nerve of Brendon to call Ryan and Dallon local gods. The Brobecks gave us the magnum opus that was Violent Things. Ryan spun pure gold out of lines like ‘Sugarcane in the easy morning/Weathervanes my one and lonely,’ one of the most devastatingly romantic couplets committed to a pop song in recent times. It also didn’t take six people to write... 

And how does Brendon manage to express his love? Courtesy of ‘Don’t Let the Lights Go Out’: ‘You’re the only one that can operate my heavy machinery.’   

Simply put, this album is fucking trash. It’s the audio equivalent of linoleum: Dull, sterile and incredibly tacky. Brendon manages to hit new lows I didn’t even think were possible after Death of a Bachelor and 2018’s Pray for the Wicked. Here, his ego is just out of fucking control, at his most theatre kid worst. I mean, why bother listening to Viva Las Vengeance when you can just listen to IDKHow’s ‘Choke’ instead? That’ll give you a pretty good idea of just how much of a self-absorbed piece of shit Brendon is... 

‘We are the new Dead Kennedys,’ he has the gall, the gumption, the sheer audacity to claim on ‘Star-Spangled Banner.’ Bitch, you’re barely Imagine Dragons at this point. You’re less relevant than MGK. You’re Adam Levine-lite, with the same level of skill when it comes to seduction.  

You wouldn’t even be in possession of the Panic! name in the first place if it weren’t for Ryan. You’re not better than somebody just because you’re richer and more famous. You’ve managed to burn every bridge with almost every bandmate at this point, yet you wonder why you’re so lonely and miserable at the top. You might be the voice of Panic!, but they were the talent. You live a sad and delusional existence, and you’ve successfully managed to destroy whatever goodwill you still had from however many Panic! fans remain with this record. Well done. As the kids like to say: Retire, bitch. 

Don’t bother listening to Viva Las Vengeance. Do something better with your time and go listen to IDKHow or The Young Veins instead.  

- Bianca B. 

[brandonwayneb]

and no,

they dont 'only' dislocate the shoulder to make SHH deer headlight jokes.. and disconnect astrology healthier, they make excuses to MUTILATE exactly "MUTILATE" as a backdoor brutality elmo farm

as i said, there are half blind agents used as office "pets" and "toy box" behaviors hidden in double language "cultural" war and "cultural pitting"

and years of misguided cases of information, "folders" Foe Deers, and files, "butterflies" or "butterfly" skin

murder mystery remarks WITHIN office, not distracted out, agents in "queens" "under pressure" is my joke to remind the impact of brutality and human trafficking

zero tolerance INTERNAL affairs of undermined brutality languages,

make clear with DE code

and pro life the survival "nexus" names

Emo Gothic Rainbow Cupid

No "skat skit duels"

No "buu build dike die kit clown bar"

No quadriplegic mutilated missing Ferris wheel jokes at McDonald's and Daniel Radcliffe sell subway murders

no Paris Hilton flabbergasted Buckys gas station freeway air outhouse bang

No perverse marble x men agents "blood marble" "blue marble" and "anvil pretend anniversary" and "anvil metal needle war"

no marble gold fish men getting away with double agent abuse standards all based on rhymes and baby languages... office agents wouldnt stand a healthy chance, agaisnt so much horror in plain sight..

just bypass all the excuses on "fantasy" kite ate tay

and focus on not "market"

say Sand MeerKat

Red Mars

Red Bee

Red Deer

Red Bull

not "guacamole, margarita, marmalade syrup, maple, dipstick, car engine"

etc etc..

keep best public franks free

style emo gothic rainbow cupids

make sure to take your Zyrtec allergy medicine sarcasm :)

ask war engaged police do they like giving que pawns :)

warSHip

because we change it into CHeriSH

and absolutely focus seriously on astrology elf skin necromancy

free may zen

zero star-Spangled Banner

[bllsbailey]

Code Pink Showed Up at Jake Tapper's House and Got Quite the Surprise

Let’s get something out of the way here: bravo to these kids. I’d never suspect that the children of a CNN host would react this way when besieged by a bunch of raving lunatics over the war in Gaza. Code Pink dispatched some of their goons to the home of CNN host Jake Tapper, peddling terrorist talking points, long-debunked false narratives about Israel, and, of course, the myth of genocide in the region, the far-left’s pièce de resistance  Bonchie at RedState had this first, but Tapper’s kids waved to the Code Pink clowns and played the Star-Spangled Banner. No one cares about spilled terrorists, so, by all means, keep laughing, waving, and mocking these clowns. Watch the video—they’re all unhinged:To set the scene, the protesters showed up and started shouting into a bullhorn about how Israel bombed the Al-Ahli hospital. As RedState reported in late 2023, the hospital was not bombed. Rather, the parking lot area was hit by a Palestinian Islamic Jihad rocket that fell short. While the "Gaza Ministry of Health" initially claimed 500-700 dead, the actual death toll was around 25 people. It was one of the first major hoaxes of the war. Apparently, these protesters didn't get the memo. More likely, they just don't care because they lie like they are breathing. […] PROSTESTER ONE: We hope you're proud. You may be laughing now, but one day, you will realize the damage that your dad will cause, and I promise, this big house won't be worth it. PROTESTER TWO: You're waving, and you think it's really funny, but the truth is that it's really sick. Okay, you should walk away.  On this matter, and at this moment, yeah, I’ll be on ‘Team Tapper;’ it’s just too much fun. It’s not nearly as funny as when pro-Hamas supporters besieged the home of Sen. John Fetterman (D-PA), who proceeded to go up on his roof and hold the Israeli flag. Recommended Trending on Townhall Videos

[hifuu-yuri-club]

Clownpiece is still so funny to me since her clothing is clearly based off of the American flag, her boss theme is called “Pierrot of the Star-Spangled Banner”, while also being a fairy from hell and designed to resemble a clown.

Overall, pretty accurate depiction of the US tbh lmfao

[jvnkerderek]

"Viva Las Vengeance" - Panic! At the Disco

Release Date: 8/19/2022 Album Ranking: 7/10

Track Ranking:

1.) Don't Let The Light Go Out 2.) All by Yourself 3.) Do It To Death 4.) Say It Louder 5.) God Killed Rock And Roll 6.) Middle Of A Breakup 7.) Sugar Soaker 8.) Local God 9.) Sad Clown 10.) Something About Maggie 11.) Star Spangled Banner 12.) Viva Las Vengeance

[skrrtscree]

Viva Las Vengeance is out so I decided to waste 43 minutes of my life and here's my thoughts.

Note: any song after Local God is my first time listening to it, so all these reactions were written as the song was playing.

Also I'm using the tumblr app so idk how to cut text sorry.

Viva Las Vengeance:

This song has already been shat on to death for good reason

The verse and the chorus don't fit at all with each other

And the slow part near the end is not it😬

Middle of A Breakup:

Just saying this now the lyrics on these songs are VERY on the nose AND unoriginal

'Keep your disco, give me T-Rex' tf is that suppose to mean???

It's meh. Not as painful as the first one for sure.

Don't Let the Light Go Out:

Said it before and I'll say it again: Ed Sheeran knock-off.

Shows that Brendon doesn't need uplifting beats and screehing to make a good song

Well 'good' is subjective but this is one fo the better ones.

Local God:

This song should be in JAIL.

I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT IHATE IT-

Doesn't flow together AT ALL

It's 2022 Brendon why did you make an ENTIRE 3 MINUTE SONG about a guy you haven't talked to in YEARS???

Star Spangled Banger:

the title is a obvious lie, this shit ain't banging at ALL

Why is brendon sing-talking some parts in the verse?? Could he not fit all the lyrics in??

Good to know that the verse and the chorus not fitting together is gonna be a running theme throughout this album

God Killed Rock and Roll:

I swear the beginning of with the piano this sounds like a cheap knockoff of bohemian rhapsody

The musical flow of this song SUCKS so much its kinda funny. It starts with piano with an accompany of a chorus which is the only decent part of the entire song, then the pre-chorus has a quicker beat and the switch feels so abrupt.

I don't like that it sounds like brendon is trying to chase the lyrics in the chorus

Say it Louder:

Ngl the beat actually sounds good???

'For the people in the back(back,back,back) bros trying to create his own echo💀

None of it sounds out of place so far.. his voice does kind of sound a bit werid though its kind of expected of him at this point

OK nvm, it got slow again around the middle

Sugar Soaker:

The come on come ons do not fit the beat of the chorus. They fit the verses just fine though.

He's definitely making the choruses sound 'fulfilling' when it's just the verse but upped an octave. It just comes off as lifeless..

Wtf were those come ons at the end, its like hes creating dramatic tension through audio

Something About Maggie:

HELP NOT THAT HIGH NOTE FOLLOWED BY ALL THE LOW ONES, yeah that made me actually laugh

'Let him GOOO🤩' 'people say people say run away run away😈'

Sorry but the only ones who wrote a good line about slitting wrists were MCR and that was in 2004 🙄

Also Panic hasn't really been 'emo' since Fever (maybe Vices but that's pushing it) so not only is this line just yeesh it doesnt fit at all.😬

So glad Brendon decided to embrace his snake persona with how he's saying his s' at the end of sentences

'oh yeah'😚

Brendon PLEASE stop messing up the track by switching beats halfway through it

a a a a a a a a

Friendship ended with Sarah, now Maggie is my bestie

Sad Clown:

Title is kinda self-aware, ain't it?

Alright Brendon we know you were on Broadway but that doesn't mean you have to force yourself to sing like that on your songs

Only dogs can hear it I stg

Great he got slow AGAIN out of no where, cause that went so well the last time he did it (viva las vengeance)

All By Yourself:

Another self-aware title damn, he's on a kick with these.

He likes mentioning those posters on my wall. Ironically I have two IDKHOW and FØB posters and none of him lol.

Even with a slow song like this, it still feels like he's forcing himself to sing higher than he has to.

He was right about changing everything all by himself though.

This actually sounds pretty nice, I will admit.

Do it To Death:

What else is there left to say? It sounds the exact same as the other songs..

It keeps teasing me thinking he's gonna say something else-OH SCREW OFF NOW THIS 'shut up and go to bed' SHIT AGAIN

I sat through 40 minutes of your mediocre music just to get jumpscared with a viva las vengeance callback END ME

In short: im disappointed but not surprised. This doesn't even feel like Panic anymore. The lyrics are bland and repetitive, Brendons vocals are truely fighting on their last legs and the songs can't commit to a single beat. It's like he had too many ideas and thought he could execute them all but he couldn't. I can't believe this album is actually real, I refuse to listen to this ever again.

If the studio versions of these songs sound so dogshit, I canNOT wait to hear about the tour versions.

Bonus note: the song spotify decided to auto play right after finishing the album was Famous Last Words which idk whether to laugh or cry.

[touhoutunes]

Title: Piece of Clown

Arrangement: 梗

Vocals: 越田Rute隆人

Album: Piece of Clown

Circle: AbsoЯute Zero

Original: Faraway 380,000-Kilometer Voyage, Pierrot of the Star-Spangled Banner

[gensokyobeat]

♫ Mirror ♫

♫ Original: 星条旗のピエロ | The Clown of the Star-Spangled Banner

♫ Source: 東方紺珠伝　～ Legacy of Lunatic Kingdom

♫ Original: 神々が恋した幻想郷 | The Gensokyo The Gods Loved

♫ Source: 東方風神録　～ Mountain of Faith 

♪ Album: 犬猫的電子座曲

(Art Source)

[thatisdifficult]

Clownpiece: "Say hello to my little friend!" 

PiChUuN pichuun PICHUUN pichuun~ PICHUUN~ pichuun

[homestucksongcomics]

Masterpost of Song Comics Part I (A-K)

*Unfortunately, due to a peculiarity of tumblr, a post containing too many links will not have any of them function. Thus, the masterpost has been broken into two parts.*

Organized by musician alphabetically

Last updated on 07/18/2021

See Part II here: Masterpost of Homestuck Song Comics Part II (L-Z)

#:

Kryptonite - 3 Doors Down by absinthianlyunheroic

This is War - 30 Seconds to Mars by caffieneandcarpaltunnel

I’m Not Your Boyfriend Baby - 3HO!3 by awildcale

A:

Almost Lover - A Fine Frenzy by irlmako

New Tomorrow - A Friend In London by maria-artz

Hand Over Mouth, Over and Over - A Lot Like Birds by binart

Skyfall - Adele by stormfather

Song of Healing - Adriana Figueroa by talkshitnojutsu

Everything Stays - Adventure Time by starchip-one

Kiss my Eyes and Lay Me to Sleep - AFI by 413art

Prelude 12/21 - AFI by toastyhat

Another Day - Air by chubsintubs

A Whole New World - Aladdin by copper-fish

Mercy Me - Alkaline Trio by brainbent

Hothouse - Aly & AJ by dristr

Evelyn, Evelyn - Amanda Palmer by p-pamda

Luck - The American Authors by timehwimeh

21 Guns - American Idiot Cast by jankyweeaboo

Pittsburgh - The Amity Affliction by anafigreen

Inevitable - Anberlin by suchirolle

Ready to Die - Andrew W. K. by askherroyalcondesce

The Age of Not Believing - Angela Lansbury by toastyhat

Director - The Antlers by gin-and-djinn

Kettering - The Antlers by cloudymew

My Mamma Said - Aqua by xamag-homestuck

Suburbs - Arcade Fire by porrim-maryam and collaborators

Wake Up - Arcade Fire by catprinx

We Used to Wait - Arcade Fire by drawingspecibus

R U Mine? - Arctic Monkeys by dacadaca

The Ballad Of Love And Hate - The Avett Brothers by umjulikins

Hey Brother - Avicii by esmeblaise

Wake Me Up - Avicii by a-vodka-mutini

Sail - AWOLNATION by theamazingzombiegirl

B:

If I Die Young - The Band Perry by japhers

Memory - Barbra Strisand by toastyhat

Glitter and Gold - Barns Courtney by chibigaia-art

Daniel in the Den - Bastille by tomato-bird

Pompeii - Bastille by maria-artz Broken

Pompeii - Bastille by toastyhat and oskarna

Above the Clouds of Pompeii - Bear’s Den by groveofsketches

Let it Be - Beatles by toastyhat

The Fool on the Hill - The Beatles by robotoucan

All the Pretty Little Horses - Becky Jean Williams by purplecalamity

Pieces of Sky - Beth Orton by awildcale

Sweet Dreams - Beyoncé by dacadaca

River Below - Billy Talent by kamdensl

Rusted from the Rain - Billy Talent by crispychocolate

Just a Game - Birdy by redwordsoncavewalls

Kill the Lights - The Birthday Massacre by xamag-homestuck

Red Stars - The Birthday Massacre by lord-caliborn and tricotee

These Days - The Black Keys by digitallyimpaired

In the End - Black Veil Brides by rinasart

Let it Be - Blackmill (feat. Veela) by awildcale

Bad Sun - The Bravery by crashtest-therapist

Dear Agony - Breaking Benjamin by yukishii-chan

Diary of Jane - Breaking Benjamin by nevernoahh

Give Me a Sign - Breaking Benjamin by perceptur

I Will Not Bow - Breaking Benjamin by themockingcrows

First Day of My Life - Bright Eyes by usatoria

Can you feel my heart? - Bring me the horizon by domingoos and Yumegurren

Seeds - Brooke Fraser by anno-bannano Broken

Kodaline - Brother by zzpopzz

When I Was Your Man - Bruno Mars by babynarwalshineyeyes

P.O.W. - Bullet for My Valentine by anafigreen

C:

Angel with a Shotgun - The Cab by dawngyocry

How Are You - Cage the Elephant by facetiousfanatic Part 1

How Are You - Cage the Elephant by facetiousfanatic Part 2

How Are You - Cage the Elephant by facetiousfanatic Part 3

The loneliest Girl - Carol and Tuesday by cassandraooc

Morning Has Broken - Cat Stevens by thlange

Star Spangled Banner - Chase Holfelder by chillybuns

Between the Bars - Chris Garneau by roselalondee

Dirty Night Clown - Chris Garneau by idontevenknow-anymore

Dirty Night Clown - Chris Garneau by immabananana

Enter the Circus - Christina Aguilera by askinsanegamzee Broken

A Thousand Years - Christina Perii by angstyelf

A Thousand Years - Christina Perii by mari-victal

Burning Gold - Christina Perri by raspberrylemonhead

Fall - Cider Sky by nevernoahh

Falling (Demo) - The Civil Wars by zomdi

Safe and Sound - The Civil Wars by karaokekarkat

Hum - Clara C by nymphicus

3 Foot Tall - Classifed by kyrah-art

Summer Day - Coconut Records by kathysbrotherssister

Fondu au Noir - Coeur de Pirate by derperistical

Fix You - Coldplay by absinthianlyunheroic

Paradise - Coldplay by Moonpaw

The Scientist - Coldplay by ikimaru

Up with the Birds - Coldplay by the-rag-tag-earl

Viva la Vida - Coldplay by raspberrylemonhead

Viva La Vida - Coldplay by rozeart

Yellow - Coldplay by mariedisgrace

Young Volcanos - Coldplay by kawo-shin

Princess of China - Coldplay (feat. Rihanna) by sora-la

Chin Up - Copeland by vriskamidfangserket

Accidentally in Love - Counting Crows by hopelesslyblithe Broken

Crywank are posers - Crywank by p-666t

D:

Thrice - Daedalus by foramen-magnum

Something About Us - Daft Punk by moxel

Something About Us - Daft Punk by yazzdonut

Emotion - Daft Punk (MissingNo remix) by doomzy

The Spine - Darren Korb (Transistor) by rose-ebottles Broken

Youth - Daughter by zelpixel

Raise Your Weapon - Deadmau5 by marintan

Go Get Your Gun - The Dear Hunter by mcsiggy

Whisper - The Dear Hunter by prospt and collaborators

I Will Follow You Into the Dark - Death Cab for Cutie by davsturdur

I Will Follow You into the Dark - Death Cab for Cutie by inusushi

I Will Follow You Into the Dark - Death Cab for Cutie by kawaiifarts

Bottom of the River - Delta Rae by wwhatevven

Perfect Insanity - Disturbed by vasheren

Just Be Friends (Instrumental) - Dixie Flatline by cheese3d Inspired by Litlte Red Riding Hood

Pity Dance - Dn Stith by jazzango

Venus Hum - Do You Want to Fight Me by shubbabang

Everything You Ever - Doctor Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog by thesassylorax

My Eyes - Doctor Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog by equiu5

Close Every Door - Donny Osmond by allegro-designs

Baby Mine - Dumbo by gayrupunzel

E:

I See Fire - Ed Sheeran by arachnerdsgri

I See Fire - Ed Sheeran by themockingcrows

Small Bump - Ed Sheeran by janecrockeyre

Cosmic Castaway - Electrasy by themockingcrows

Telephone Line - Electric Light Orchestra by daily-beta

You are my Sunshine - Elizabeth Mitchell by the-rag-tag-earl

Goodnight Sweet Ladies - Emilie Autumn by amporasexual

Asleep - Emily Browning (originally by The Smiths) by joker-ace

O Come O Come Emmanuel - Enya by pseudocon

One for the Money - Escape the Fate by ikimaru

Follow the Sun - Evermore by ladygrit

Fever Dreamless - fadeintocase by peregr1ne

F:

Centuries - Fall Out Boy by sixofclovers

Immortals - Fall Out Boy by etcterrayellowmoon

Immortals - Fall Out Boy by mari-victal

Immortals - Fall Out Boy by quiversarrow

My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark (Light Em Up) - Fall Out Boy by toastyhat

The Kids Aren’t All Right - Fall Out Boy by i-am-a-riceball

The Kids Aren’t All Right - Fall Out Boy by scarlettheknight

The Last of the Real Ones - Fall Out Boy by dopingues

The Phoenix - Fall Out Boy by orangelemonart

Caught Like a Fly - Falling in Reverse by viria

Tragic Magic - Falling in Reverse by elasticitymudflap

Heavy Storm - First Aid Kit by moxel

Wolf - First Aid Kit by spooneaterarts

100 years - Five for Fighting by orangelemonart

Superman - Five for Fighting by grimbarke

Hurt Feelings - Flight of the Conchords by koroke

Rise - Flobots by lyricstuckbeatdown

Blinding - Florence + the Machine by collaborative

Cosmic Love - Florence + the Machine by rosemaryserver

Cosmic Love - Florence + the Machine by starkthirdeye

Cosmic Love - Florence + the Machine by toastyhat

Dog Days Are Over - Florence + the Machine by greatbiglyricstuck

Dog Days are Over - Florence + the Machine by m0thboy

Girl With One Eye - Florence + the Machine by kingdomzombified

Kiss With a Fist - Florence + the Machine by miraculoustang

No Light, No Light - Florence + the Machine by dacadaca

No Light, No Light - Florence + the Machine by nappotuna

Only If for a Night - Florence + the Machine by glueball

Seven Devils - Florence + the Machine by fangirlinginleatherboots

Seven Devils - Florence + the Machine by themockingcrows

Shake it Out - Florence + the Machine by cod-tier

Tear out my Tongue - Florence + the Machine by wheresmyhamlet

What the Water Gave Me - Florence + the Machine by colonoscolypseart

With an Axe - Foxy Shazam by oldshiel

Something Stupid - Frank and Nancy Sinatra by toastyhat

Some Nights - Fun. by greatbiglyricstuck

G:

Mad World - Gary Jules by ahabsiconoclast

Mad World - Gary Jules by prospitheir and aze

Mad World - Gary Jules by synnesai

Where Everybody Knows Your Name - Gary Portnoy by calliotp

Child of Light - The Getaway Plan by dingohugs

It All Dies Anyway - The Gits by skittykitty55

Take Me Away - Globus by toastyhat and splickedylit

You’re the One That I Want - Grease by doodlebonez

Top of the World - Greek Fire by eggsand-santoast

Song of the Century - Green Day by babakinkin

Song of the Century - Green Day by delinked

Song of the century - Green Day by the-rogue-0f-light

Boats and Birds - Gregory and the Hawk by striderprovider

Hard Knocks - Griffinilla and Alex Cole by colouredteapot

H:

Colors - Hasley by innocuoussketches

Anything - Hedley by valeriannnn

The Unquiet Grave - Hellen McCrocry by madreamcanular

Coming Back Down - Hollywood Undead by flynnagan

Coming Back Down - Hollywood Undead by skittykitty55

Levitate - Hollywood Undead by anafigreen

SCAVA - Hollywood Undead by scarlettheknight

Temporal Shenanigans - Homestuck ost - Rachel Macwhirter by arachnerdsgrip:

Almost (Sweet Music) - Hozier by metaname

Take Me To Church - Hozier by sailerscrimshaw Broken

God Help the Outcasts - Hunchback of Notre Dame by velocitiestrumpet

The Court of Miracles - Hunchback of Notre Dame by moc-tod-ffuts-modnar

That’s Okay - The Hush Sound by porcupet

Where We Went Wrong - The Hush Sound by canni8al

Wine Red - The Hush Sound by zeborah

I:

Volatile Times - IAMX by xamag-homestuck

Bad Karma - Ida Maria by margarethours

Amsterdam - Imagine Dragons by paperseverywhere

Bleeding Out - Imagine Dragons by rapidopatter

Demons - Imagine Dragons by muraokami Broken

Demons - Imagine Dragons by rapidopatter

Fallen - Imagine Dragons by maria-artz Broken

I'm So Sorry - Imagine Dragons by abbiwhozit

I'm So Sorry - Imagine Dragons by catkindness Part 1

I'm So Sorry - Imagine Dragons by catkindness Part 2

Nothing Left to Say - Imagine Dragons by paperseverywhere

On Top of the World - Imagine Dragons by lickfoot

Radioactive - Imagine Dragons by falloutboyonboy

Radioactive - Imagine Dragons by rachelhungry

Thief - Imagine Dragons by mikimosh

Warriors - Imagine Dragons by turretsyndr0me

Hide and Seek - Imogen Heap by kingdomzelaybli

The Devil’s Carnival - In all My Dreams I Drown by artblogofminji

Don’t Stop - InnerPartySystem by spocktalia Broken

What We Will Never Know - InnerPartySystem by lets-lyricstuck

Cinders and Smoke - Iron & Wine by laughingandgrief

Walk the Moon - Iscariot by cissaisthisyou

The Weekend - Islands by daily-beta

J:

R.I.P. Everyone - J.J. Demon by trickstercarlos

Fallin’ - Jake Bugg by awildcale

I Won’t Give Up - Jason Mraz by impudentkid

I’ll Be Good - Jaymes Young by asexualls Broken

Sufferer’s Final Sermon - jbriner by sketchloft

Be Thou My Vision - jbriner (originally a hymn) by mrdespondency

O Death - Jen Titus by canni8al

Oh Death - Jen Titus by artweaver5

If the World Should End - Jennifer Damiano by atrueenglishman

The Hanging Tree - Jennifer Lawrence by sixofclovers

Highwayman - Johnny Cash by toastyhat

What A Wonderful World - Joseph William Morgan ft. Shadow Royale by jayspants

The Stars - Jukebox the Ghost by innocuoussketches

K:

Die Young - Ke$ha by gelasticat

[S] Ke$ha: Enter - Ke$ha (Die Young Remix by captaincrapster) by ket3

Because of You - Kelly Clarkson by timehost

Breakaway - Kelly Clarkson by karaokeoctoberkat

Britland City Theme - Kenashcorp by stormfather

Animals - Kids in Glass Houses by faun-songs

Dustland Fairytale - The Killers by spiritleaf

Mr. Brightside - The Killers by mlle-annette

Sam´s Town - The Killers by gei-may

Smile Like You Mean It - The Killers by toastyhat

I Will Never Forget - Kimya Dawson by moxel

All I Want - Kodaline by godtier8itch

[wegottagetouttahere]

Viva Las Vengeance song-by-song ratings under the cut 😂

Final album rating: 2/10. The songs are cookie-cutter low-effort money-grabbing radio singles. A couple of them could be somewhat catchy but they have weird tempo changes that make them even harder to dance to. The lyrics suck. It ain’t good, folks. Trashing each song in turn under the cut!

Viva Las Vengeance: oh god not the pre-downloaded ringtone riff. Wow he’s really reaching for the rhymes here. What is this song about again? Someone tell him he’s not a good pianist. It’s the Disney channel visual effects for me. Final rating 3/10 was bad

Middle of a Breakup: this is literally the same song??? Not joking it sounds exactly the same, musically. These lyrics suck. Yeah that’s all I can say. These lyrics suck. The video is boring too. Final rating 1/10 blatant money grab

Don’t Let The Light Go Out: starting the music video with himself listening to his own song on the radio is tacky and bad. Ok so this is the song where he’s gonna try to be deep. Again with the Disney channel visual effects! God does every song have to be a “lol watch how high I can belt” it’s boring! why are all these songs about breakups isn’t this man married. Final rating 3/10 idc about this one

Local God: AGAIN WITH THE BORING ASS INTRO. Oh this is another “look at me I’m famous” song. Hate this get me out of here. I’d this man incapable of writing anything not in 4/4 Dorian? My knowledge of music production is so minimal and yet I can tell you this mixing sucks. Final rating 1/10 boring

Star Spangled Banner: oh god is this a patriotism song? Please tell me no. OH THIS IS BAAAAADDDDDDD LMAO. Home of the freaks ok mr capitalism. Ok one point to him for trying to do something jazz… esque? However points away from him because it is bad and doesn’t work. Ugh aGAIN with the high belting! We don’t care! God this comes off as “how do you do fellow alternative teens?” Final rating 1/10 terrible terrible

God Killed Rock and Roll: title sucks. This sounds like it’s out of a Glee episode I hate it. Oh this is bad. He wants to be Queen soooo bad and he’s falling soooo short lmao. Ok this is a little catchy. Still not great, the backing vocals add nothing. Aaaaaaand we’re back to half tempo. Make up your mind!!! It just sounds like you’ve got a bad drummer!! What exactly is the message of this song…? Wow this man thinks he did something with this. Final rating 3/10 could be worse but that doesn’t mean it’s good

Say It Louder: this is the first intro that’s been vaguely interesting, and by that I mean it sounds like someone else wrote it. This is boring. Ok at this point his belting just sounds so strained. He sounds like he’s barely breathing. It ain’t good. Final rating 2/10 snooze fest

Sugar Soaker: you know, I might have hope for this! The riff is catchy! Nope never mind. This went downhill fast. It’s still better than all the others so far. The buildup to the chorus takes me out of the moment. This song would be better with a different singer, someone less Broadway. Like if Joan Jett covered this it could be good. DO SOMETHING ELSE, ANYTHING ELSE WITH YOUR BACKING HARMONIES I BEG YOU I AM BORED TO DEATH. Final rating 4/10 the best so far but that’s like being the tallest leprachaun

Something About Maggie: I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again the lyrics suck. The guitars are real boring. This sounds like any new panic at the disco song, I don’t care about it. WHAT is that ending?? 3/10 It could be worse but it could be a LOT better

Sad Clown: Mr. Urie hire a writer I’m begging you. You cannot write lyrics!!! What the hell is this music video? It’s like it’s trying to be ironic and classy at the same time but it’s failing at both and just comes off like a little kid’s dance recital, but less charming. “Even though I’m smiling I’m crying” wow so deep. He sounds like a goddamn cat, wailing like that. Final rating 1/10 I hate it

All By Yourself: Ryan Ross doesn’t think about you at all Mr. Urie, I guarantee you. Oh this is BAD bad… what exactly are you changing, Mr. Urie? What profound difference are you making in the world? I can’t even finish this one it’s so bad. Final rating 1/10 faker than a piñata.

Do It To Death: ok, this isn’t bad so far, whoop never mind! The old bait and switch! Sounds like if the characters in Cars 2 formed an amateur band. This is catchier than most of the other songs on the album, but it’s not catchy enough to warrant four and half minutes. The bridge is bad. Wow like really bad! He had to pull in a reference to another song to make this even less cohesive, wow! Final rating 4/10 mid.

This is a collection of some of the least memorable songs I’ve ever heard, I literally could not tell you what the music I listened to no more than ten minutes ago sounds like. Thoroughly unoriginal.

[hello-alonso]

Two Brother’s Collaborations in Touhou

A little while ago I spoke about Touhou and its crazy sampling culture. Well, now I am gonna be showcasing a group that I love and have been listening to their music ever since 2014. In my podcast, I even went and played a sample of their song to demonstrate the metal/rock ways Touhou gets sampled. The group is Demetori. Demetori is two person group consisting of brothers,  Tadashi Teramae (he focusses on drums, percussions, programing, and mixing) 

and Masaru Teramae (he focusses on the guitar, bass, and synth). 

Of the research that I’ve done, I’ve found that Demetori has no songs with any vocals and they have only ever collaborated with one other artist and that was one of their first songs, back in 2005. All of their other work beyond that has been their own and it the talent really shines through in my opinion. It’s pretty nice to see the talent of two brothers and using it to create these spectacular metal arrangements. 

At this point I’d like to describe their ways of making music. Like I said earlier, Touhou is the source to many artists songs. So, just like many other artists, Demetori takes a simple song from any of the Touhou games and pretty much makes it a metal/rock song. 

For example, a song made from ZUN, called “Magus Night”

This same song was used to create Demetori’s version of it.

With only a few seconds in, you can easily see that they are similar sounding. That’s what it’s like for all of Demetori’s songs, they takes these rather simple instrumental songs from ZUN and create their own versions of them. They have been doing this process ever since 2005! The last time they released anything was in 2018 with a huge album. In their albums they most of the time go per game. For example if Touhou 15 was the subject, all the songs in the album would be sampled off of the songs in that game. 

The guitar and drums flow very smoothly in all of their songs and they have a pretty good distribution for the instruments. There’s never really any time they try to take the spotlight. You can always hear the drums and guitar and they really compliment each other very nicely in their songs. 

Take for instance this song, Star-Spangled Banner Clown. It’s one of their more recent songs made in 2017. In it you immediately get jumped into the fast metal/rock pace with the drums going crazy. The part I really enjoyed was the section of 3:02 - 3:43. I mean, c'mon, that guitar is fucking insane. 

As for Demetori’s popularity, they have been pretty small in these years. Their initial spark of interest in the mid 2000′s was because of Touhou, now I feel like they get known more from other places. The first places I heard Demetori was on osu! (rhythm game) back in 2014. From there I was able to see a handful of songs created to be played. I’ve also herd them in other rhythm games, such as Beat Saber, where A LOT of their songs are mapped into a playable course. 

There's not really much that is known from these two, they have very low profiles and do not share much of their personal lives on the internet. They both have twitter accounts but it’s all in Japanese and from the looks of it, it’s just a personal account that does not really specialize in their music. It's really a shame, I wish there were videos of them live in a concert, because I know that the guitar and drums would go crazy in a public setting.

The person in the video below is not Demetori, however, I think it’s an amazing cover on one of their songs. Plus, it’s the closest thing I’ll get to seeing a performance by someone. 

The electric guitar really does wonders. It’s such a sharp sounding instrument and an attention grabber for sure. 

Three years have passed since they have released any music, so I will be patiently waiting for that time to come. From what I’ve heard, Demetori, does not have any misses. All they have are bangers. 

Thank you for reading. 

http://demetori.xii.jp/

[brandonwayneb]

Pro Life War Flag Banter

Shit Shoots america dine and dash liars and lares, fan spin affairs

Pro Life Flag War Banter

research social medias

tumblr: BrandonWayneB

twitter: @BrandonWayneB

LinkTree: https://linktr.ee/brandonwayneb (https://linktr.ee/brandonwayneb)

research Red Tom Tom Pilot Stylists

“Mckinney Texas”

“Dial Ass OutLets” “Dallas Texas”

“Tacoma Washington”

“Towel Rub Micro CrumBill Powder”

“false taco mania trucks”

“MIA victims” 

“inventory clergymen perverse malpractices”

“pur gay torey” “core bbq grills”

“inventory in purgatory”

mass genocides

backdoor brutality officers engaged in necromancy and spiritual malpractice 

Steve and the Star-Spangled Banners genocide in america

“gimp” mall pray stay sis “malpractice”

strawberry daiquiri details, virgin islands, stylist blood worship

“day quill” agents trying to pull “strawberry daiquiri details”

mind reader

is just two deers

Free May Zen

Namaste 

Magic Tea

Dough Master Cake Ted Dets

Mastery Namaste 

Damn Zeal

Man Master

Prayer

🙏🏽 

Master Mother May Eye

Master May Star

Name Master

Namaste

56 Star Snake

Sow Lasso

and keep First and Last

No american gimmicks in genocide

#allah #god #war #news #public #cern #zen #zenith #cam #mac #mick #kim #mic #microphone #microsoft #tech #pc #blood #et #ghost #jasper #casper #judah #hispanic #spanish #irish #asian #india #psy

"elf Skin, a Strahl, a G necromancy" keep Tom Tom Red Bee Pilot

Pro Life Worship

Kits Knight Skin Honors Only

play vs "Clown Die Kit Bar"

[clairebeauchampfan]

AChristmas Story: The Three Wise Guys, by Damon Runyon

The Three Wise Guys

One cold winter afternoon I am standing at the bar in Good Time Charley's little drum in West Forty-ninth Street, partaking of a mixture of rock candy and rye whisky, and this is a most surprising thing for me to be doing, as I am by no means a rum-pot, and very seldom indulge in alcoholic beverages in any way, shape, manner, or form.

But when I step into Good Time Charley's on the afternoon in question, I am feeling as if maybe I have a touch of grippe coming on, and Good Time Charley tells me that there is nothing in this world as good for a touch of grippe as rock candy and rye whisky, as it assassinates the germs at once.

It seems that Good Time Charley always keeps a stock of rock candy and rye whisky on hand for touches of the grippe, and he gives me a few doses immediately, and in fact Charley takes a few doses with me, as he says there is no telling but what I am scattering germs of my touch of the grippe all around the joint, and he must safeguard his health. We are both commencing to feel much better when the door opens, and who comes in but a guy by the name of Blondy Swanson.

This Blondy Swanson is a big, six-foot-two guy, with straw-coloured hair, and pink cheeks, and he is originally out of Harlem, and it is well known to one and all that in his day he is the largest puller on the Atlantic seaboard. In fact, for upwards of ten years, Blondy is bringing wet goods into New York from Canada, and one place and another, and in all this time he never gets a fall, which is considered a phenomenal record for an operator as extensive as Blondy.

Well, Blondy steps up alongside me at the bar, and I ask him if he cares to have a few doses of rock candy and rye whisky with me and Good Time Charley, and Blondy says he will consider it a privilege and a pleasure, because, he says, he always has something of a sweet tooth. So we have these few doses, and I say to Blondy Swanson that I hope and trust that business is thriving with him.

'I have no business,' Blondy Swanson says, 'I retire from business.'

Well, if J. Pierpont Morgan, or John D. Rockefeller, or Henry Ford step up and tell me they retire from business, I will not be more astonished than I am by this statement from Blondy Swanson, and in fact not as much. I consider Blondy's statement the most important commercial announcement I hear in many years, and naturally I ask him why he makes such a decision, and what is to become of thousands of citizens who are dependent on him for merchandise.

'Well,' Blondy says, 'I retire from business because I am one hundred per cent American citizen. In fact,' he says, 'I am a patriot. I serve my country in the late war. I am cited at Chateau Thierry. I always vote the straight Democratic ticket, except,' he says, 'when we figure it better to elect some Republican. I always stand up when the band plays the Star Spangled Banner. One year I even pay an income tax,' Blondy says.

And of course I know that many of these things are true, although I remember hearing rumours that if the draft officer is along half an hour later than he is, he will not see Blondy for heel dust, and that what Blondy is cited for at Chateau-Thierry is for not robbing the dead.

But of course I do not speak of these matters to Blondy Swanson, because Blondy is not such a guy as will care to listen to rumours, and may become indignant, and when Blondy is indignant he is very difficult to get along with.

'Now,' Blondy says, 'I am a bootie for a long time, and supply very fine merchandise to my trade, as everybody knows, and it is a respectable business, because one and all in this country are in favour of it, except the prohibitionists. But,' he says, 'I can see into the future, and I can see that one of these days they are going to repeal the prohibition law, and then it will be most unpatriotic to be bringing in wet goods from foreign parts in competition with home industry. So I retire,' Blondy says.

'Well, Blondy,' I say, 'your sentiments certainly do you credit, and if we have more citizens as high-minded as you are, this will be a better country.'

'Furthermore,' Blondy says, 'there is no money in booting any more. All the booties in this country are broke. I am broke myself,' he says. 'I just lose the last piece of property I own in the world, which is the twenty-five-G home I build in Atlantic City, figuring to spend the rest of my days there with Miss Clarabelle Cobb, before she takes a runout powder on me. Well,' Blondy says, 'if I only listen to Miss Clarabelle Cobb, I will now be an honest clerk in a gents' furnishing store, with maybe a cute little apartment up around One Hundred and Tenth Street, and children running all around and about.'

And with this, Blondy sighs heavily, and I sigh with him, because the romance of Blondy Swanson and Miss Clarabelle Cobb is well known to one and all on Broadway.

It goes back a matter of anyway six years when Blondy Swanson is making money so fast he can scarcely stop to count it, and at this time Miss Clarabelle Cobb is the most beautiful doll in this town, and many citizens almost lose their minds just gazing at her when she is a member of Mr. Georgie White's 'Scandals,' including Blondy Swanson.

In fact, after Blondy Swanson sees Miss Clarabelle Cobb in just one performance of Mr. Georgie White's 'Scandals,' he is never quite the same guy again. He goes to a lot of bother meeting up with Miss Clarabelle Cobb, and then he takes to hanging out around Mr. Georgie White's stage door, and sending Miss Clarabelle Cobb ten-pound boxes of candy, and floral horseshoes, and wreaths, and also packages of trinkets, including such articles as diamond bracelets, and brooches, and vanity cases, for there is no denying that Blondy is a fast guy with a dollar.

But it seems that Miss Clarabelle Cobb will not accept any of these offerings, except the candy and the flowers, and she goes so far as to return a sable coat that Blondy sends her one very cold day, and she is openly criticised for this action by some of the other dolls in Mr. Georgie White's 'Scandals,' for they say that after all there is a limit even to eccentricity.

But Miss Clarabelle Cobb states that she is not accepting valuable offerings from any guy, and especially a guy who is engaged in trafficking in the demon rum, because she says that his money is nothing but blood money that comes from breaking the law of the land, although, as a matter of fact, this is a dead wrong rap against Blondy Swanson, as he never handles a drop of rum in his life, but only Scotch, and furthermore he keeps himself pretty well straightened out with the law.

The idea is, Miss Clarabelle Cobb comes of very religious people back in Akron, Ohio, and she is taught from childhood that rum is a terrible thing, and personally I think it is myself, except in cocktails, and furthermore, the last thing her mamma tells her when she leaves for New York is to beware of any guys who come around offering her diamond bracelets and fur coats, because her mamma says such guys are undoubtedly snakes in the grass, and probably on the make.

But while she will not accept his offerings, Miss Clarabelle Cobb does not object to going out with Blondy Swanson now and then, and putting on the chicken Mexicaine, and the lobster Newburg, and other items of this nature, and any time you put a good-looking young guy and a beautiful doll together over the chicken Mexicaine and the lobster Newburg often enough, you are apt to have a case of love on your hands.

And this is what happens to Blondy Swanson and Miss Clarabelle Cobb, and in fact they become in love more than somewhat, and Blondy Swanson is wishing to marry Miss Clarabelle Cobb, but one night over a batch of lobster Newburg, she says to him like this:

'Blondy,' she says, 'I love you, and,' she says, 'I will marry you in a minute if you get out of trafficking in rum. I will marry you if you are out of the rum business, and do not have a dime, but I will never marry you as long as you are dealing in rum, no matter if you have a hundred million.'

Well, Blondy says he will get out of the racket at once, and he keeps saying this every now and then for a year or so, and the chances are that several times he means it, but when a guy is in this business in those days as strong as Blondy Swanson it is not so easy for him to get out, even if he wishes to do so. And then one day Miss Clarabelle Cobb has a talk with Blondy, and says to him as follows:

'Blondy,' she says, 'I still love you, but you care more for your business than you do for me. So I am going back to Ohio,' she says. 'I am sick and tired of Broadway, anyhow. Some day when you are really through with the terrible traffic you are now engaged in, come to me.'

And with this, Miss Clarabelle Cobb takes plenty of outdoors on Blondy Swanson, and is seen no more in these parts. At first Blondy thinks she is only trying to put a little pressure on him, and will be back, but as the weeks become months, and the months finally count up into years, Blondy can see that she is by no means clowning with him. Furthermore, he never hears from her, and all he knows is she is back in Akron, Ohio.

Well, Blondy is always promising himself that he will soon pack in on hauling wet goods, and go look up Miss Clarabelle Cobb and marry her, but he keeps putting it off, and putting it off, until finally one day he hears that Miss Clarabelle Cobb marries some legitimate guy in Akron, and this is a terrible blow to Blondy, indeed, and from this day he never looks at another doll again, or anyway not much.

Naturally, I express my deep sympathy to Blondy about being broke, and I also mention that my heart bleeds for him in his loss of Miss Clarabelle Cobb, and we have a few doses of rock candy and rye whisky on both propositions, and by this time Good Time Charley runs out of rock candy, and anyway it is a lot of bother for him to be mixing it up with the rye whisky, so we have the rye whisky without the rock candy, and personally I do not notice much difference.

Well, while we are standing there at the bar having our rye whisky without the rock candy, who comes in but an old guy by the name of The Dutchman, who is known to one and all as a most illegal character in every respect. In fact, The Dutchman has no standing whatever in the community, and I am somewhat surprised to see him appear in Good Time Charley's, because The Dutchman is generally a lammie from some place, and the gendarmes everywhere are always anxious to have a chat with him. The last I hear of The Dutchman he is in college somewhere out West for highway robbery, although afterwards he tells me it is a case of mistaken identity. It seems he mistakes a copper in plain clothes for a grocery-man.

The Dutchman is an old-fashioned-looking guy of maybe fifty-odd, and he has grey hair, and a stubby grey beard, and he is short, and thickset, and always good-natured, even when there is no call for it, and to look at him you will think there is no more harm in him than there is in a preacher, and maybe not as much.

As The Dutchman comes in, he takes a peek all around and about as if he is looking for somebody in particular, and when he sees Blondy Swanson he moves up alongside Blondy and begins whispering to Blondy until Blondy pulls away and tells him to speak freely.

Now The Dutchman has a very interesting story, and it goes like this: It seems that about eight or nine months back The Dutchman is mobbed up with a party of three very classy heavy guys who make quite a good thing of going around knocking off safes in small-town jugs, and post offices, and stores in small towns, and taking the money, or whatever else is valuable in these safes. This is once quite a popular custom in this country, although it dies out to some extent of late years because they improve the brand of safes so much it is a lot of bother knocking them off, but it comes back during the depression when there is no other way of making money, until it is a very prosperous business again. And of course this is very nice for old-time heavy guys, such as The Dutchman, because it gives them something to do in their old age.

Anyway, it seems that this party The Dutchman is with goes over into Pennsylvania one night on a tip from a friend and knocks off a safe in a factory office, and gets a pay roll amounting to maybe fifty G's. But it seems that while they are making their getaway in an automobile, the gendarmes take out after them, and there is a chase, during which there is considerable blasting back and forth.

Well, finally in this blasting, the three guys with The Dutchman get cooled off, and The Dutchman also gets shot up quite some, and he abandons the automobile out on an open road, taking the money, which is in a grip sack, with him, and he somehow manages to escape the gendarmes by going across country, and hiding here and there.

But The Dutchman gets pretty well petered out, what with his wounds, and trying to lug the grip sack, and one night he comes to an old deserted barn, and he decides to stash the grip sack in this barn, because there is no chance he can keep lugging it around much longer. So he takes up a few boards in the floor of the barn, and digs a nice hole in the ground underneath and plants the grip sack there, figuring to come back some day and pick it up.

Well, The Dutchman gets over into New Jersey one way and another, and lays up in a town by the name of New Brunswick until his wounds are healed, which requires considerable time as The Dutchman cannot take it nowadays as good as he can when he is younger.

Furthermore, even after The Dutchman recovers and gets to thinking of going after the stashed grip sack, he finds he is about half out of confidence, which is what happens to all guys when they commence getting old, and he figures that it may be a good idea to declare somebody else in to help him, and the first guy he thinks of is Blondy Swanson, because he knows Blondy Swanson is a very able citizen in every respect.

'Now, Blondy,' The Dutchman says, 'if you like my proposition, I am willing to cut you in for fifty per cent, and fifty per cent of fifty G's is by no means pretzels in these times.'

'Well, Dutchman,' Blondy says, 'I will gladly assist you in this enterprise on the terms you state. It appeals to me as a legitimate proposition, because there is no doubt this dough is coming to you, and from now on I am strictly legit. But in the meantime, let us have some more rock candy and rye whisky, without the rock candy, while we discuss the matter further.'

But it seems that The Dutchman does not care for rock candy and rye whisky, even without the rock candy, so Blondy Swanson and me and Good Time Charley continue taking our doses, and Blondy keeps getting more enthusiastic about The Dutchman's proposition until finally I become enthusiastic myself, and I say I think I will go along as it is an opportunity to see new sections of the country, while Good Time Charley states that it will always be the great regret of his life that his business keeps him from going, but that he will provide us with an ample store of rock candy and rye whisky, without the rock candy, in case we run into any touches of the grippe.

Well, anyway, this is how I come to be riding around in an old can belonging to The Dutchman on a very cold Christmas Eve with The Dutchman and Blondy Swanson, although none of us happen to think of it being Christmas Eve until we notice that there seems to be holly wreaths in windows here and there as we go bouncing along the roads, and finally we pass a little church that is all lit up, and somebody opens the door as we are passing, and we see a big Christmas tree inside the church, and it is a very pleasant sight, indeed, and in fact it makes me a little homesick, although of course the chances are I will not be seeing any Christmas trees even if I am home.

We leave Good Time Charley's along mid-afternoon, with The Dutchman driving this old can of his, and all I seem to remember about the trip is going through a lot of little towns so fast they seem strung together, because most of the time I am dozing in the back seat.

Blondy Swanson is riding in the front seat with The Dutchman and Blondy also cops a little snooze now and then as we are going along, but whenever he happens to wake up he pokes me awake, too, so we can take a dose of rock candy and rye whisky, without the rock candy. So in many respects it is quite an enjoyable journey.

I recollect the little church because we pass it right after we go busting through a pretty fair-sized town, and I hear The Dutchman say the old barn is now only a short distance away, and by this time it is dark, and colder than a deputy sheriff's heart, and there is snow on the ground, although it is clear overhead, and I am wishing I am back in Mindy's restaurant wrapping myself around a nice T-bone steak, when I hear Blondy Swanson ask The Dutchman if he is sure he knows where he is going, as this seems to be an untravelled road, and The Dutchman states as follows:

'Why,' he says, 'I know I am on the right road. I am following the big star you see up ahead of us, because I remember seeing this star always in front of me when I am going along the road before.'

So we keep following the star, but it turns out that it is not a star at all, but a light shining from the window of a ramshackle old frame building pretty well off to one side of the road and on a rise of ground, and when The Dutchman sees this light, he is greatly nonplussed, indeed, and speaks as follows:

'Well,' he says, 'this looks very much like my barn, but my barn does not call for a light in it. Let us investigate this matter before we go any farther.'

So The Dutchman gets out of the old can, and slips up to one side of the building and peeks through the window, and then he comes back and motions for Blondy and me to also take a peek through this window, which is nothing but a square hole cut in the side of the building with wooden bars across it, but no windowpanes, and what we behold inside by the dim light of a lantern hung on a nail on a post is really most surprising.

There is no doubt whatever that we are looking at the inside of a very old barn, for there are several stalls for horses, or maybe cows, here and there, but somebody seems to be living in the barn, as we can see a table, and a couple of chairs, and a tin stove, in which there is a little fire, and on the floor in one corner is what seems to be a sort of a bed.

Furthermore, there seems to be somebody lying on the bed and making quite a fuss in the way of groaning and crying and carrying on generally in a loud tone of voice, and there is no doubt that it is the voice of a doll, and anybody can tell that this doll is in some distress.

Well, here is a situation, indeed, and we move away from the barn to talk it over.

The Dutchman is greatly discouraged, because he gets to thinking that if this doll is living in the barn for any length of time, his plant may be discovered. He is willing to go away and wait a while, but Blondy Swanson seems to be doing quite some thinking, and finally Blondy says like this:

'Why,' Blondy says, 'the doll in this barn seems to be sick, and only a bounder and a cad will walk away from a sick doll, especially,' Blondy says, 'a sick doll who is a total stranger to him. In fact, it will take a very large heel to do such a thing. The idea is for us to go inside and see if we can do anything for this sick doll,' Blondy says.

Well, I say to Blondy Swanson that the chances are the doll's ever-loving husband, or somebody, is in town, or maybe over to the nearest neighbours digging up assistance, and will be back in a jiffy, and that this is no place for us to be found.

'No,' Blondy says, 'it cannot be as you state. The snow on the ground is anyway a day old. There are no tracks around the door of this old joint, going or coming, and it is a cinch if anybody knows there is a sick doll here, they will have plenty of time to get help before this. I am going inside and look things over,' Blondy says.

Naturally, The Dutchman and I go too, because we do not wish to be left alone outside, and it is no trouble whatever to get into the barn, as the door is unlocked, and all we have to do is walk in. And when we walk in with Blondy Swanson leading the way, the doll on the bed on the floor half-raises up to look at us, and although the light of the lantern is none too good, anybody can see that this doll is nobody but Miss Clarabelle Cobb, although personally I see some changes in her since she is in Mr. Georgie White's 'Scandals.'

She stays half-raised up on the bed looking at Blondy Swanson for as long as you can count ten, if you count fast, then she falls back and starts crying and carrying on again, and at this The Dutchman kneels down on the floor beside her to find out what is eating her.

All of a sudden The Dutchman jumps up and speaks to us as follows:

'Why,' he says, 'this is quite a delicate situation, to be sure. In fact,' he says, 'I must request you guys to step outside. What we really need for this case is a doctor, but it is too late to send for one. However, I will endeavour to do the best I can under the circumstances.'

Then The Dutchman starts taking off his overcoat, and Blondy Swanson stands looking at him with such a strange expression on his kisser that The Dutchman laughs out loud, and says like this: 'Do not worry about anything, Blondy,' The Dutchman says. 'I am maybe a little out of practice since my old lady put her checks back in the rack, but she leaves eight kids alive and kicking, and I bring them all in except one, because we are seldom able to afford a croaker.'

So Blondy Swanson and I step out of the barn and after a while The Dutchman calls us and we go back into the barn to find he has a big fire going in the stove, and the place nice and warm.

Miss Clarabelle Cobb is now all quieted down, and is covered with The Dutchman's overcoat, and as we come in The Dutchman tiptoes over to her and pulls back the coat and what do we see but a baby with a noggin no bigger than a crab apple and a face as wrinkled as some old pappy guy's, and The Dutchman states that it is a boy, and a very healthy one, at that.

'Furthermore,' The Dutchman says, 'the mamma is doing as well as can be expected. She is as strong a doll as ever I see,' he says, 'and all we have to do now is send out a croaker when we go through town just to make sure there are no complications. But,' The Dutchman says, 'I guarantee the croaker will not have much to do.'

Well, the old Dutchman is as proud of this baby as if it is his own, and I do not wish to hurt his feelings, so I say the baby is a darberoo, and a great credit to him in every respect, and also to Miss Clarabelle Cobb, while Blondy Swanson just stands there looking at it as if he never sees a baby before in his life, and is greatly astonished.

It seems that Miss Clarabelle Cobb is a very strong doll, just as The Dutchman states, and in about an hour she shows signs of being wide awake, and Blondy Swanson sits down on the floor beside her, and she talks to him quite a while in a low voice, and while they are talking The Dutchman pulls up the floor in another corner of the barn, and digs around underneath a few minutes, and finally comes up with a grip sack covered with dirt, and he opens this grip sack and shows me it is filled with lovely, large coarse banknotes.

Later Blondy Swanson tells The Dutchman and me the story of Miss Clarabelle Cobb, and parts of this story are rather sad. It seems that after Miss Clarabelle Cobb goes back to her old home in Akron, Ohio, she winds up marrying a young guy by the name of Joseph Hatcher, who is a book-keeper by trade, and has a pretty good job in Akron, so Miss Clarabelle Cobb and this Joseph Hatcher are as happy as anything together for quite a spell.

Then about a year before the night I am telling about Joseph Hatcher is sent by his firm to these parts where we find Miss Clarabelle Cobb, to do the book-keeping in a factory there, and one night a few months afterwards, when Joseph Hatcher is staying after hours in the factory office working on his books, a mob of wrong gees breaks into the joint, and sticks him up, and blows open the safe, taking away a large sum of money and leaving Joseph Hatcher tied up like a turkey.

When Joseph Hatcher is discovered in this predicament the next morning, what happens but the gendarmes put the sleeve on him, and place him in the pokey, saying the chances are Joseph Hatcher is in and in with the safe-blowers, and that he tips them off the dough is in the safe, and it seems that the guy who is especially fond of this idea is a guy by the name of Ambersham, who is manager of the factory, and a very hard-hearted guy, at that.

And now, although this is eight or nine months back, there is Joseph Hatcher still in the pokey awaiting trial, and it is seven to five anywhere in town that the judge throws the book at him when he finally goes to bat, because it seems from what Miss Clarabelle Cobb tells Blondy Swanson that nearly everybody figures Joseph Hatcher is guilty.

But of course Miss Clarabelle Cobb does not put in with popular opinion about her ever-loving Joe, and she spends the next few months trying to spring him from the pokey, but she has no potatoes, and no way of getting any potatoes, so things go from bad to worse with Miss Clarabelle Cobb.

Finally, she finds herself with no place to live in town, and she happens to run into this old barn, which is on an abandoned property owned by a doctor in town by the name of Kelton, and it seems that he is a kind-hearted guy, and he gives her permission to use it any way she wishes. So Miss Clarabelle moves into the barn, and the chances are there is many a time when she wishes she is back in Mr. Georgie White's 'Scandals.'

Now The Dutchman listens to this story with great interest, especially the part about Joseph Hatcher being left tied up in the factory office, and finally The Dutchman states as follows:

'Why, my goodness,' The Dutchman says, 'there is no doubt but what this is the very same young guy we are compelled to truss up the night we get this grip sack. As I recollect it, he wishes to battle for his employer's dough, and I personally tap him over the coco with a blackjack.

'But,' he says, 'he is by no means the guy who tips us off about the dough being there. As I remember it now, it is nobody but the guy whose name you mention in Miss Clarabelle Cobb's story. It is this guy Ambersham, the manager of the joint, and come to think of it, he is supposed to get his bit of this dough for his trouble, and it is only fair that I carry out this agreement as the executor of the estate of my late comrades, although,' The Dutchman says, 'I do not approve of his conduct towards this Joseph Hatcher. But,' he says, 'the first thing for us to do is to get a doctor out here to Miss Clarabelle Cobb, and I judge the doctor for us to get is this Doc Kelton she speaks of.'

So The Dutchman takes the grip sack and we get into the old can and head back the way we come, although before we go I see Blondy Swanson bend down over Miss Clarabelle Cobb, and while I do not wish this to go any farther, I will take a paralysed oath I see him plant a small kiss on the baby's noggin, and I hear Miss Clarabelle Cobb speak as follows:

'I will name him for you, Blondy,' she says. 'By the way, Blondy, what is your right name?'

'Olaf,' Blondy says.

It is now along in the early morning and not many citizens are stirring as we go through town again, with Blondy in the front seat again holding the grip sack on his lap so The Dutchman can drive, but finally we find a guy in an all-night lunch counter who knows where Doc Kelton lives, and this guy stands on the running-board of the old can and guides us to a house in a side street, and after pounding on the door quite a spell, we roust the Doc out and Blondy goes inside to talk with him.

He is in there quite a spell, but when he comes out he says everything is okay, and that Doc Kelton will go at once to look after Miss Clarabelle Cobb, and take her to a hospital, and Blondy states that he leaves a couple of C's with the Doc to make sure Miss Clarabelle Cobb gets the best of care.

'Well,' The Dutchman says, 'we can afford a couple of C's out of what we have in this grip sack, but,' he says, 'I am still wondering if it is not my duty to look up this Ambersham, and give him his bit.'

'Dutchman,' Blondy says, 'I fear I have some bad news for you. The grip sack is gone. This Doc Kelton strikes me as a right guy in every respect, especially,' Blondy says, 'as he states to me that he always half-suspects there is a wrong rap in on Miss Clarabelle Cobb's ever-loving Joe, and that if it is not for this guy Ambersham agitating all the time other citizens may suspect the same thing, and it will not be so tough for Joe.

'So,' Blondy says, 'I tell Doc Kelton the whole story, about Ambersham and all, and I take the liberty of leaving the grip sack with him to be returned to the rightful owners, and Doc Kelton says if he does not have Miss Clarabelle Cobb's Joe out of the sneezer, and this Ambersham on the run out of town in twenty-four hours, I can call him a liar. But,' Blondy says, 'let us now proceed on our way, because I only have Doc Kelton's word that he will give us twelve hours' leeway before he does anything except attend to Miss Clarabelle Cobb, as I figure you need this much time to get out of sight, Dutchman.'

Well, The Dutchman does not say anything about all this news for a while, and seems to be thinking the situation over, and while he is thinking he is giving his old can a little more gas than he intends, and she is fairly popping along what seems to be the main drag of the town when a gendarme on a motor-cycle comes up alongside us, and motions The Dutchman to pull over to the kerb.

He is a nice-looking young gendarme, but he seems somewhat hostile as he gets off his motor-cycle, and walks up to us very slow, and asks us where the fire is.

Naturally, we do not say anything in reply, which is the only thing to say to a gendarme under these circumstances, so he speaks as follows:

'What are you guys carrying in this old skillet, anyway?' he says. 'Stand up, and let me look you guys over.'

And then as we stand up, he peeks into the front and back of the car, and under our feet, and all he finds is a bottle which once holds some of Good Time Charley's rock candy and rye whisky without the rock candy, but which is now very empty, and he holds this bottle up, and sniffs at the nozzle, and asks what is formerly in this bottle, and I tell him the truth when I tell him it is once full of medicine, and The Dutchman and Blondy Swanson nod their heads in support of my statement. But the gendarme takes another sniff, and then he says like this:

'Oh,' he says, very sarcastic, 'wise guys, eh? Three wise guys, eh? Trying to kid somebody, eh? Medicine, eh?' he says. 'Well, if it is not Christmas Day I will take you in and hold you just on suspicion. But I will be Santa Claus to you, and let you go ahead, wise guys.'

And then after we get a few blocks away, The Dutchman speaks as follows: 'Yes,' he says, 'that is what we are, to be sure. We are wise guys. If we are not wise guys, we will still have the grip sack in this car for the copper to find. And if the copper finds the grip sack, he will wish to take us to the jail house for investigation, and if he wishes to take us there I fear he will not be alive at this time, and we will be in plenty of heat around and about, and personally,' The Dutchman says, 'I am sick and tired of heat.'

And with this The Dutchman puts a large Betsy back in a holster under his left arm, and turns on the gas, and as the old can begins leaving the lights of the town behind, I ask Blondy if he happens to notice the name of this town.

'Yes,' Blondy says, 'I notice it on a signboard we just pass. It is Bethlehem, Pa.'