#Then leaving like he didn’t just get Jimmy hard as a rock

[zappedbyzabka]

[slutouttanowhere]

Paring: Roman Reigns x Sabrina Richards™️

Warnings: none

Word count: 1420

a/n: So apparently y’all wanted a whole story, and originally I said I would only keep it going if Roman retained. Spoiler alert, sadly he did not. BUT I can’t let it go out like that, The Tribal Chief reign was one of the greatest in modern day Wwe history thus far. So, Gemini Moon: Chapter 1. Sabrina Richards is my oc that o created, I have my main characters pinned to my post. Like, reblog and leave comments. Throw the ones up one last time for our Tribal Chief ☝🏽❤️

I couldn’t stand by and watch Seth, and Cody get beat on by The Bloodline any longer, by the time I got out there, Seth, Jimmy, and Jey were laid out, outside the ring. Cody was being hounded on by Roman in the corner, I ran around their side of the ring. I tugged on Roman’s large arm as hard as I could to stop him, he reared back his fist, but froze when she saw me. I rolled Cody out the way; then I turned to Roman with my hands up pleading with him to leave Seth, and my brother in law, Cody, alone. He cracked up in laughter, his perfect, white teeth shining under the stadium lights. As quickly as his smile appeared, it left.

“Who do you think you are? Thinking you can step in here with The Tribal Chief.” Roman backed me into the corner of the ring. It hadn’t occurred to me when I came out here to try and pull him off Cody that I’d have to face The Tribal Chief. There was no way you thought you could overpower him, so I used the one thing in my arsenal I knew he wouldn’t resist. Grabbing him by the collar of his shirt, I pulled him into me, and smashed my lips into his. At first stunned he grabbed hold of my shoulders, but to my surprise, he leaned into me. I was so wrapped up in the softness of his lips, and the way he held me so closely, I almost forgot that I was supposed to be using this as a distraction.

That was until I was being ripped away, “What the hell are you doing!” Cody shouted at me, I could feel my face heat up out of embarrassment. He looked at me with wide eyes, his sky blue irises piercing through me. I looked back at Roman who was still shocked, stood right where I left him, his hand touching his lips. His eyes watching me, desire reflecting within them, and sending a chill down my spine. Everything in my soul told me to run, Jimmy and Jey were dragging themselves back into the ring, and when Roman took a step forward I automatically made a break for it. Cody grabbed Seth by the shoulders, and he clumsily stood to his feet. His eyes found mine, and his face morphed into a confused expression. They followed my lead as we retreated up the ramp.

“You never should have come out here! What if you got hurt, Brandi would have my head on a platter!” Cody fussed at me, I wasn’t hearing anything he was saying. My eyes remained on Roman who was now leaning over the top rope, and seemingly fighting himself not to chase me. I could still feel his warm lips on mine, I could still smell the hint of spearmint from his hair, and the phantom touch of his strong hands around my waist. The Tribal Chief had left his mark on me tonight.

When we finally got to the back, Cody and Seth pulled me to the side. A disappointed expression written across Cody’s face, he stood with his hands on his hips, and his head hung like a disapproving father. “Why in the hell, were you out there?” Seth asked, he still held the back of his neck where Jey kicked the shit out of him. I didn’t answer, I didn’t wanna have this conversation with Seth around, he would just laugh at me.

“Go on, tell him Sabrina…why were you out there.” Cody encouraged, my eyes found interest with the ground, and my fingers twisted together anxiously.

“I was just trying to help, I couldn’t stand by and watch you guys get rocked like that.” I tried to explain, for a moment I had Seth sold at least, and that was until Roman, and his Congo line of cousins came trotting in. Unlike Jimmy, Jey, and Solo, Roman wasn’t breaking a sweat. His hair was still neatly tied back in a tight bun, and his clothes looked fresh like he just walked out the house. Perfection.

“If by help you mean tried to get a taste of the Tribal Chief for free? Then yea, you definitely helped Sabrina.” He gloated, Paul Haymen stifled a giggle from behind Roman’s broad shoulders. Seth gasped dramatically, then slowly pivoted from Roman to me, then from me to Roman and back? I rolled my eyes, Cody hadn’t said anything, but he kept his gaze trained on the Royal Samoa tribe in front of us.

“You kissed him?” Seth finally asked out loud, as if the thought of me even looking at Roman in any kind of way disgusted him. I could feel my face heat up in embarrassment, I didn’t even have an argument, not a sensible one anyway.

Roman chucked deeply, his head lowered, then looking back up to me, his eyes darkened. Cody tensed up, at the same time Jimmy, Jey, and Solo stood at attention. “As pretty as you are, you try that again…” He trailed off, the corner of his mouth curling upward into a menacing smile, then said, “well, you know what they say?” He paused again, and even now Roman had us hanging on his every word. “Fuck around, and find out.” He growled out, he took a threatening step forward, and so did Seth. Cody pushed me by gingerly, his lips pressed together forming a line, an attempt to control his emotions. The boys had already gotten in trouble once for brawling in the back.

“If I may make a comment my Tribal Chief?” Paul Haymen cut in, Roman nodded his head in agreement without taking his intense site off me. “Might be wise of you, to reconsider who you do business with Sabrina Richards. I’ve done my research, and if it’s one thing I know about you, it’s that you’ve got an immaculate track record of working with losers.” He grinned his trademark grin, and in never wanted to lay hands on a man so badly before.

“In other words, you need to come on over here and get you some of this Tribal Chief money.” Roman said bluntly, his eyes danced playfully, and his band of goons really seemed to have found that funny.

“Are you done yet?” Seth asked, a bored expression on his face; though if anyone knew Seth, they’d know he’s ready to pop off at a moment's notice. He was never interested in doing much talking.

Roman’s face scrunched up in disgust, he glanced around at his team, “the funny man thinks he can rush me, hmm.” He scuffed, then his eyes found mine as I stood meekly behind Cody, and Seth. “Tribal Chief money babygirl.” He reiterated, then flashed me a bright smile, and when he looked upon Cody for the last time, he just laughed at him. He signaled for his council, and then left the three of us standing dumbfounded.

As soon as Roman was out of sight, Seth whipped around to me, “you kissed him!” He was on the verge of having a fit, and honestly I’m surprised how he just hasn’t up and fainted all these years. The way Seth described how I make him feel is something close to retirement every week. It’s not my fault I stress him out.

“I was trying to help!” I squeeked, we began to bicker, and Cody tried to break us up.

“I said enough!” He shouted, stepping between us, and as if enough people weren’t staring at us, I was sure the whole back crew tonight had their eyes on us. Cody pressed his palms together, more than likely praying he isn’t the one to croak out right now. He let out a defeated breath, “let’s just, go on back to the locker room while we still have some dignity. And you Sabrina, should be thinking of ways to get your head back on straight on the walk back.” Cody spared me one last glance, then turned and walked off leading the way to our shared locker room.

“Ouuu, looks like somebody upset grandpa.” Seth teased, then danced off in the same direction of Cody. I restrained myself from slapping the back of his head, and followed behind with my head held down. Though the moment had long passed, Roman’s words reverberated in the back of my mind. “Come on over here, and get you some of this Tribal Chief money.”

[umbrify]

So @liloinkoink tagged me in a little game where I post about all my wips, so people can see them and ask questions about them. I realized that I uh. I have twenty different AU concepts (all made with my beloved friend @made-nondescript ), so I’m gonna pick a few:

Merfolk AU (fWhimmy): in which Jimmy, sheriff to a small coastal town, realizes there’s something— or, someone— living right near their shores. fWhimmy mer au where fWhip is the merperson, and they have to figure out how to make it work, despite… everything.

And… is he sure about this? Joel’s gonna laugh at him— Jimmy’s certain he is. He can’t even blame him, really. What a ridiculous thing to say: I found a rock at the rock beach and I think there was a guy in the water— yeah, right. But… it feels important. It feels important enough to try. He has to try.

“I think… I think I met someone in the ocean, two nights ago,” Jimmy murmurs.

This AU does have one posted work already— [We Will See Tomorrow], which is like a prologue of sorts!

Vamp AU (WRA siblings, future fWhimmy): One mistake is all it takes to change the course of your life forever, as fWhip and Gem find out the hard way. Roseblings become vampires the messy way, and find it quite hard to come to terms with.

“Well, hello there!” The man calls brightly, perhaps just a touch too loud for the occasion at hand. fWhip bites back a flinch at the sound.

“Uh— hi,” he calls back, “I take it you have what I’m looking for?”

The man chuckles slightly, an easy smile stretching across his scarred face, and fWhip raises an eyebrow. The man steps closer, positioning himself next to fWhip. “You’re after some really valuable stuff here, you know.” The man leans down slightly, looking into fWhip’s eyes. “You sure you’re willing to pay the price?”

(If he were more observant, perhaps fWhip would’ve noticed the way the man’s too-sharp teeth flashed in the sickly orange light— his first, and only, warning.)

This one has lots of art, which can be found under [#esmp vamp au]!

Space AU (fWhimmy— sorta): They’ve landed on this planet, and too late, they’ve realized they can’t leave it. How do you come to terms with the fact you’re definitely doomed? Jimmy and fWhip are co pilots of a spacecraft sent to check on a planet that sent out a strangled distress signal, and now they’ve got plenty of time to get acquainted before the end— if fWhip could stop making things worse, that is.

“Commander Jimmy, transmission regarding the emergency distress signal received from planet ANC-19.”

“This planet is lost, and so are we. Do not send a rescue mission. This planet is sick, it cannot be saved. I repeat, do not send anyone else here. They will die. There are no survivors. There is nothing of value left here.”

Snowpocalypse AU— or, hey what if Xornoth kidnapped Scott and used his ice powers to cause eternal winter? Wouldn’t that be fucked up? Scott’s absence is noticed very quickly by Gem, who drags fWhip and Jimmy to his house to check on him

“Oh—“ Gem turns the handle, the door swinging open slightly. “Scott! I’m coming in!!”

The lights are on as the step inside— fWhip knew they were, of course, but…

Well. He didn’t expect this.

The house is completely trashed— the coffee table is turned on its side, a mug of what might’ve been coffee or tea has shattered on the ground, the liquid partially stained into the rug. The pillows from the couch are strewn all around the room, and half the cabinets are thrown open, as if someone was looking for… something.

“…Scott?” fWhip calls, hesitantly.

Something is definitely wrong.

(More quick ones below the cut!)

fWhimmy Apocalypse AU (also featuring lots of fWhip & Pix): In which fWhip and Pix make the hardest trip of their lives to Jimmy’s house, with fWhip determined to see Jimmy again, against all odds. Apocalypse, but not in the zombie sense— think more like if sculk was a bit more fucked up. This one has all of its current writing posted [here!]

Superhero AU: You know the trope of “villain goes to superhero’s doorstep, super injured, and is like ‘I didn’t know where else to go’?” That, but it’s Jimmy going to fWhip, and fWhip is more of a vigilante than a hero, and Jimmy doesn’t necessarily… like… get redeemed. I remember this one had a long section in the notes about how Jimmy is a villain by choice, not because he was forced to be.

Antique shop AU: Nondescript and I went off for a While about this one, which created [this post]— basically, Pix runs an antique shop in a college town, and he hears about the lives of fWhip and Jimmy when they visit his shop

Android fWhip AU— or, hey what if the reason empires one fWhip survived the blast was because he wasn’t human at all, and nobody knew until Gem finds him in the wreckage? And then there’s the whole situation with— well, how do you just not notice that your brother is an android? This one had a whole scene where Gem takes a mangled fWhip over to Mezalea, as one of the last standing empires, and Joel tries to help them repair fWhip. I made [art] for this one, which is the only thing this AU has so far

There are a lot more, but I think that’ll do for now! I’d be happy to answer any questions about any of these, or any of my other writing :D !!

(As for tagging folks, I don’t wanna bother too many people, but if @blocksruinedme or @stitchthesewords wanna share any AU’s, go wild my friends!)

[jadienjaystoriesandart]

The Tunnels

Summary: A hiking trip goes wrong when Grian falls down into an open root system under the place. His friends go back to get help, leaving him alone in the darkness under the ground. And with a feeling that he is not alone here. That someone or something is watching him in the darkness. Also there is a bunch of shrooms growing around as well.

Notes: This isn’t part of the main sires of The Mushroom Man, just a au of Scar being a cryptid of evolved human/spore species that lives in the darkness of caves. 

Warnings: Dubcon, Aphrodisiacs used, Body Horror, Smut, Corruption, Scittes (lol), tentacles/vines, Horny Jail For Everyone.

-

Down. Down. Down.

Grian grunted as he slide down the rooted and wet slope into the darkness below. He heard Jimmy yell out to him, along with the others. As the ground have gave out beneath Grian. The roots scratched at his cheeks as he hit the ground with a hard thump at the end.

A faint groan escaped his mouth as he had landed on something, coughing a bit as dust and something earthy, possibly dirt, filled his lungs. He coughed again as he looked up at the light from the crack he fell down at. He could faintly make out Jimmy and Mumbo’s forms. 

“GRIAN!” the muffled yells echoed down to him, “Are you okay!?” Mumbo’s voice yelled down to him.

Grian looked up at them, and at the large roots and sharp rocks up, “Yeah! I’m fine!” he called back to them wincing a bit, his ankle hurt alot. 

There was muffled voices agian before Jimmy yelled down, “Can you get back up!?” he asked his friend worriedly.

Looking again at the steep rocks and decaying roots he groaned, “No!” he said wincing a bit when he tried to stand. “it’s too steep, the roots won’t hold my weight even if I tried... and I think I sprained my ankle!” he called back. His voice echoing around him in the large cave system. 

The two were talking again to each other, Grain really couldn’t make out their voices as the were far above him. He got out his flashlight and shook it a few times to get it working as it seems to have been a bit damaged. But luckily the light came on, if a bit weak.

He shined it around the cave looking up and around. Roots hung down from the top, along with moss growing along the walls and flooring. There was also mushrooms all around in the walls and such, “Woah...” Grian muttered out in awe, some of them were huge! Guess this was the right conditions for them to grow in being underground. It was damp, dark, and well protected from frost.

It was also warm down here, despite it nearing the autumn season it was spring temperatures here. He also guessed during the summer it stayed cool due to rain fall. 

“GRIAN!” He looked back up at his friends, “We’re gonna go find someone who can get you out of there, try not to wander off. We’ve marked the nearby trees to find our way back.” Jimmy told him.

Suppose that was the best course of action, Grian didn’t want to get lost in these tunnels but climbing out also wasn’t an option without a rescue team. “Alright!” he called back, “I’ll stay here for the time being... please hurry back!” he told them.

With confirmations to return, Grian listened to the sound of fading footsteps... and leaving him alone in the dark with the only light source being the crack above him. Looking around again, Grian sighed as he took a seat on the ground and set his hiking bag beside him.

He was prepared at least for a long haul, and could last 3 weeks on rations here. He had been hiking alot, so at least knew what he was doing. he looked with his flashlight to where he fell to see some crushed mushrooms, he must have landed on them... well their size might have also softened the fall a bit. They didn’t look poisonous either, they looked like larger versions of the Caesar Mushroom. 

Grian turned off his flashlight for the time being, if he was here at dark he’d need it later. the way back would take at least 4 hours for them, it’d be dark by the time they got there, and even then to wait for the rescue team in the morning. Grian grimaced a bit, he might need to get his sleeping bag out to preserve warmth and make a fire. 

The cave was silent, save for the sound of the wind coming from above him, Grian sat back against the rooted wall, lost to his thoughts. It was kind of creepy down here, the cave was huge, meaning the roots of the tall trees outside had possibly opened up this limestone caves by eroding away everything. It seemed stable though, with the roots holding up everything above him. 

The sun was slowly starting to set, and it was growing darker as Grian was trying to get a small fire going. Which was hard as it was so damp down here. He narrowed his eyes in frustration, blowing lightly on the flames to get them going.

CLICK

Grian froze and looked up sharply and around the cave, his heart started to pick up the pace as fear was gathering. He swore he heard... footsteps? Something like that, it didn’t sound like a rock falling, nor the dripping of water from above. His eyes darted around in the darkness, unable to see anything clearly other than outlines of shapes and shadows. 

He swallowed hard, trying to take deep breaths to calm down. it could have been nothing, maybe it was just some small fox or something that made it’s home down here. Honestly the idea of being mauled by a fox or bear was easier to bear than... something else. 

Yet still, he couldn’t shake the feeling of being watched now. 

It was said humans evolved to have a sixth sense, the rustle of a bush could have been the wind or a predator. But Human’s running from it were the smarter ones, and whether it was or wasn’t dangerous, still meant they lived for another day. Which was why the feeling of being watched was one of them, a sense that something dangerous and large or even smart was lurking around. 

The hairs on the back of his neck stood on end, as Grian tended to the flames again. Trying to take his mind off of it. Feeling better when he did get the fire going, and it started to lit up the area a bit.

A sigh of relief escaped his throat, that was another thing, fire, light, a fear of the dark that was innate in us. Grian was honestly scared of the dark, or rather what possibly lurked in the dark. He gripped his flashlight and looked around again, though it didn’t chase away all the darkness, it did enough for him to see things better. 

Slowly, he started to calm down again, trying to ignore the feeling... it was nothing, it was nothing... it was-

*Huff*

Everything in Grian froze up and he jumped a bit, looking around wildly now and trying to turn on his flashlight. That... that wasn’t hum, that was breathing! And it didn’t sound like an animal he knew either! After some banging the light came on, and he shined it around the cave. Wildly looking for what made that noise, hoping it was an animal of sorts. 

For a moment, nothing showed, just the mushrooms in the darkness and roots. Grian swallowed again, his mouth felt dry, his heart was racing. He knew he heard-

Something caught his eye, and Grian shined the light on it. The beam didn’t go far, the flashlight wasn’t something powerful, just a simple tool to help someone go find a place to pee outside then return to the tent. So it could barely make it out, the... silhouette of something in the darkness.

Grian’s breath hitched, as glowing green eyes stared at him illuminated by the light of the flashlight. It... looked human, uncanny valley vibes as it titled it’s head at a 90 degree angle. It was staring dead at him, watching him, Grian’s scream caught in his throat and he froze like a deer in the headlights.

Freeze kicked in first, as he couldn’t flight and didn’t know if he could fight. Hoping, in some primitive part of his brain, that if he stayed still enough, the creature would think him not alive. 

For a long moment, the two stared at each other, glowing green eyes staring into Grian’s brown ones. Grian was barely breathing right now, slowly, in and out, trying not to make a sound. To not make a single move.

Then, the creature stood up, allowing Grian to make out the shape for a moment. tall, muscular looking with... something on it’s shoulders and he could also see something on it’s head. What seemed to be dust shook off it.

Then the flashlight gave out, and plunged the area into darkness.

“Shit!” Grian swore moving to try and get it on again, the only light now was the campfire next to him, but even that didn’t give enough light to see where the thing had gone!

A sound of something moving around, dragging against the rocky, damp floor. Dirt being scooted around, as Grian took a shaky breath trying to get his only light source to work. 

He could hear his heartbeat in his ears, taking a shaky breath again. Trying to listen to where it could have gone! Tears stung his eyes, fear closing up his throat. He gripped a branch that he used to start the fire, best guess, a weapon of sorts against this... thing.

Grian heard it again, getting closer to him. As he turned around to the left, then the right, trying to see where it was. Too scared to talk, to move, he was back in the corner, and fear rushed over him. It was close, it had to be close, it was stalking him. What even was it? Something human yet... not?

Another ound, to his right as Grian turned sharply to it. Faintly he could see something in the low light of the fire, it was close it was-

Something was blown into his face, and Grian started to cough hard as it filled his nose and mouth. And earthy taste in it, his brain felt... foggy all of a sudden as he wheezed out a breath. His limbs felt... heavy... 

“Now now...” a voice, human sounding but... something was off about it. “Let’s put this out, much too bright in here.” it gripped his wrist, and squeeze. His grip loosened on the branch as it fell to the ground. There was a hiss as it hit the damp floor, and then everything turned dark again. 

There was a thick early scent around Grian, as something pressed up to him from the front. For a moment, it was dark, then he saw glowing green eyes, in fact the things skin was glowing! 

Grian’s mind felt sluggish he he could make out a scar running across the face, that had these purple roots growing out of it. In fact, there were mushrooms, glowing mushrooms, on this face of a male’s shoulders and arms. 

A clawed hand ran over his face, messing with his hair, “A human?” he asked curiously, male sounding too. “Been a while since a human has wandered down here.” a smile, showing a glowing tongue and sharp teeth.  The hand moved down over Grian’s chest, “But a pretty human too,” messing with his sweater, Grian breathed in another earthy scent from this guy. His mind felt slower again, and... warm too. 

The hand moved lower, Grian gasped as it pressed against his pants lightly. A chuckle, “Breath deeply little human, let us make you feel so good.” he cooed to him, as something wrapped around his wrist and held them up. two hands roamed over his body and claws started to... tear at his shirt. 

Grian made a confused sound at that, then whined as a touch against his skin set his body alight with warmth again. He felt sensitive all over, skin pressed against his chest, just now, in the other parts of his brain, did he notice this guy didn’t have much clothing on either. 

“Good little one,” The creature breathed out, nuzzling his lips against his neck, “Tell me your name, please?” he asked in a gentle, soothing tone.

“G-Grian.” he managed out, voice slurring out the words, his tongue felt heavy in his mouth, each thought was lazily floating in and out, grasping it was like fog. It felt.. easier to just feel everything than to speak. 

“Grian.” The creature purred out the name, “Well you can call me Scar, pretty one.” a smirk against his skin. “Or, if you prefer, some call me Daddy.” he teased as Grian’s breath hitched a bit at that. 

Fingers tugged down his pants, breaking the button and forcing the zipper open. Grian whined a bit at that, as it brushed over his tent now, Scar chuckled again looking into his eyes. “Relax my newest Sporeling. Let the Father Spore give you his gift.” he cooed to him, a hand rubbing his hard on now.

Grian gasped a bit as the hand rubbed him up and down slowly, carefully, teasing the tip with a sharp clawed thumb. The taste of earthy something in his mouth again, as lips met his, and slid in the glowing tongue. 

Scar groaned against him, giving messy kissing as he explored in his mouth. Grian felt everything was so warm, filled with a pleasure hazy, more... fuck, he wanted more. A whine escaped between kisses. “Hmmm, S-Scar...?” he asked in a confused tone, tasting the name for a moment.

A smirk, against his lips, Scar said nothing kissing him again. The hand letting go of his cock to start lifting him. Grian whined at the lose of friction, before something slimy, and long wrapped around his length. He groaned out as it started to jerk him off. 

“Relax pretty Grian,” Scar breathed to him, “It’ll feel oh so good once I get my spores inside you.” he promised, as something rubbed against his entrance. 

Grian whined, he wasn’t even prepped yet, what was- “A-Ahhhh!” he cried out as the tip easily slid into him, covered in something that was like lube almost. It was a tight fit, Scar groaned out due to how tight it was. 

The... vine? around his length tighten it’s hold and started to move at a faster pace than before. As Scar slid inside him, completely, and all the way in. Groaning against his neck as he kissed it. Grian stared ahead, eyes dazed and fogged over. Faintly he noticed the... shrooms on the others back and shoulders smelled the same scent as the stuff in the air. 

Scar let him adjust for a moment, before he started to move back, then push forward with a hard thrust. “A-Ah! S-S-... Ahhh hmmm!” Grian moaned out as the thrusts picked up the pace.

“Now now little sporeling, you have to use your words, what do you want Daddy to do?” Scar grunted out, pushing in and out of that tight hole, his vines jerking off Grian, who had tears in his eyes from other stimulation. 

Grian was letting out mewls and moans of pleasure, every sense in him alight with pleasure. As the dick inside him rubbed in the right spots, just barely missing the spot he wanted it to hit. He whined out, “P-Please... Please... please!” he babbled out to him.

A deep hum, “Please what?” he asked back with a groan of his own, “You have to call me by what I am now, Grian.” he teased him lightly going slower again when Grian whined in frustation.

It was almost there, just please.. please.. “Oh... fuck! Daddy! Please!” he cried out, “Please daddy, fuck me harder!” he begged a bit, through whines and whimpers at how painfully slow both the vine and Scar was going. 

A pleased rumble as Scar kissed him softly, “Ofcourse pretty one.” he purred out as he started to now go faster again, and hit that spot hard.

“AH!” Grian cried out, throwing back his head, panting heavily as he breathed in more of that rather sweet scent now. “Daddy! Fuck!” he whined out as that spot was hit over and over. He was so close, “I’m... cu-!” 

Scar gripped him tightly, “With me now darling.” he commanded, pushing in hard with a sigh as Grian cried out. 

Cum painted his and Scar’s chest and stomach, as... warmth filled Grian. Pushing it’s way inside him, and filling him up. A hazy, lust filled fog clouded his mind.  Scar hummed deeply again, breathing in slow and deep against Grian’s hair.

It felt... amazing, hugging onto his mind, his body, everything. Cool, damp, yet also so warm. 

Scar kissed his head, ‘You love me.’ something whispered in his head.

Grian smiled in a daze at Scar, “I love you.” he repeated back in a far away tone.

‘You want me.’

“I want you.”

‘Stay with me’

“I’ll stay with you.” 

Grian nuzzled Scar’s chest tiredly as Scar pulled out of him, and his arms were let go. Scar picked him up easily, kissing him again softly, “Let’s get you to be my newest pretty sporeling.” he cooed, looking at his cum leaking out of the other, “I wonder what a pretty mushroom you’ll become?”

A dazed smile at that, as Grian snuggled up to him, he was so tired... as Scar walked him deep into the darkness of the cave, he liked the dark.

. . .

There was not a sign, no hair of Grian. His torn clothing was found at the bottom of the caves, along with what remained of a campfire and backpack. The cave system had collapsed in at one end of it, making exploration impossible.

There were no signs of a struggle either, meaning something had came and possibly either killed the hiker in his sleep and dragged him deeper, or kidnapped him in his sleep.

Jimmy and Mumbo swore their friend would never explore deeper, but no other leads were found.

In the end, it was demeaned a animal attack, and the case was closed. Considering there was bigger problems, like the suddenly growth of giant mushrooms in the forest. 

[romanstheory]

I'm The One a Jey Uso fic pt 5/?

Last Part

Warnings; Language, Smut, Dirty Talk, Teasing, Visuals

Word count: 1,011

My mind was everywhere….. did he really just kiss me in front of the entire world? “I see you grew some balls uce” Jimmy teases. “I just couldn’t help myself…. Look at her” Jey says eyeing me. We celebrate our win at a local bar where Jey has a shot too many so we all Uber back to the hotel.

A now drunk Jey passes out on our hotel bed. I pull the blanket over him and let him rest. “What was that?” I say sitting next to Jimmy. “Oh he’ll be cool he just did a little too much. He’ll sleep it off” Jimmy says. “No….. the kiss. I mean I enjoyed it but I’m confused” I reply looking at Jey then back and Jimmy. He lifts his head and sighs lightly. “That man is in love with you” he replies “I knew from the second he looked at you when you and Solo became friends. He’s afraid…. he’s been through it all” He pauses for a second “I keep telling him don’t fumble the opportunity and he’s finally listening. He’s crazy about you man. The family…. They already love you. They were ready to disown Solo over you” Jimmy smirks.

Jimmys words echoed through my braid over and over again. “He wasn’t happy in his last relationship, I knew he wasn’t supposed to be with her. But you…. You breathe life into him” Jimmy says. Truth is I’ve always been head over heels for Jey too. He was in a long term relationship when I first met him. “Y’all are going to get married one day….. and when you do if I’m not the best man I’m objecting to the marriage” Jimmy teases. “When he’s not drunk as fuck… talk to him about it”

Jimmy has always had this amazing ability to comfort any and everyone. He’s wise and witty, like the brother I never knew I wanted. I make myself comfortable next to Jey and Jimmy goes back to his room.

Morning comes and Jey groans awake, rolling over to put his arm around me. He wakes me with a forehead kiss. We get dressed and ready for the day when I abruptly ask him about last night. “I’m just a little confused….. what did that mean?” I ask. “I was hoping it would mean we were together now” Jey says with the most hopeful look in his eyes.

“I was hoping the same thing” I reply softly. Jeys eyes light up before he pulls me into a tight hug, planting kisses all over my face. “I talked to Jimmy last night” I begin to say. Jey raises an eyebrow “okay?” He replies. “He told me you’ve always felt this way…. But you were scared”

He sighs deeply “yeah that’s the truth. My ex put me through a lot” he begins “I know you won’t do the same thing but that girl scarred me” I didn’t want to pry or focus on his past, I just wanted to move forward and look into our future together.

My stomach fills with butterflies, like I was 15 again on my first date. Jeys warm hands reach for my face, pulling me into a soft kiss. My body melts into his hands like ice cream on a summer day. We both allow our bodies to fall into the soft hotel room bed. Our tongues tangle and untangle with passion. Oh my god I want him, just the sight of him drives me crazy. His hands squeeze my thick soft ass while I lift one leg over him. I feel his long length growing under me. “I want you to ride me” He groans into my ear squeezing my ass again.

“Can you handle it?” I tease. "Find out" He snarls, squeezing my ass in his hand and kissing my neck softly. "I don't think you want it enough" I tease again. I grind on him slowly, shaking my hair behind me to get it out of the way. I lean down to kiss and suck on his neck with no regard of how much shit we would get in leaving evidence of our escapades. Jey groans as he squeezes my ass tighter. Our lips lock again, his lips warm and soft. "I'm about to cum right now if you don't quit playing" Jey says.

I giggle quietly and get off of him. I slowly strip my clothes off, never breaking eye contact with Jey. He kicks his sweatpants off quickly and eagerly. I grab his now rock hard member and guide myself onto it slowly, making him squirm and exhale sharply. "mmhh" He says with his lips slightly parted. My wet vagina guides up and down his length circling around in between. "You love this pussy huh?" I ask lustfully, already intoxicated by him. Jey puckers his lips, blowing warm air out of the center and nods his head slowly. His hand rest on my hips gently. He guides my breasts into his mouth, sucking and licking on my nipple.

Oh my god I think this is the best sex we've ever had. His tongue circled my nipple, making my body warm while I grind on his pulsating penis. His big hand covered the small heart tattoo between my breasts. I throw my head back and close my eyes, picking up speed. Jey begins to moan loudly, I love hearing him it turns me on. "Baby I-" I struggle before I cum..... Loudly and more intensely than I ever have before. He grabs my hips again, guiding me up and down his long length, making me scream and make sounds I didn't think possible. "Fuck" Jey roars "Oh my god fuck!" Jey yells as he reaches his limit, I can feel his member twitching inside of me over and over again.

"Is that what girlfriend sex with you is like?" Jey asks, panting still recovering from his climax. "Mhmm, and it's all yours daddy" I say kissing his neck one more time before getting up to clean myself up. This man does something to me.... Something nobody else has. I like it.... I would almost even say.... I love it.

[canarydarity]

hello,, remember that Jimmy centric harbinger of death au I mentioned months back? Have a snippet of a scene from the first chapter :) (which will be posted in full soon!)

“Jimmy, look out!” 

From over his shoulder, he hears it—the spark and a slight buzz, like static; for a weird second, he thinks of the radio and the crackling, the sand in the desert. But he knows better, he knows that hiss, a sound that haunts him both awake and asleep. It doesn’t matter that he was just facing that direction and had seen no sign of any creepers—there was a conditioned response to what he just heard, everyone has one; Jimmy’s is to drop, ducking to the ground hands up and over his head—not that they would’ve done anything to protect him had the threat been real. 

And while nothing happened—no crater dug itself into the ground, no hole ripped itself through his barely-armored body, no gasp as he woke up back in that desert—the panic was most definitely real. Seasoned target of one too many jokes, following the usual progression Jimmy knows the anger comes next; the panic would fade upon the realization that the threat wasn’t real and the annoyance at whatever joke was played would take its place, no less insistent and intense as the feeling before it. But as Jimmy cowers on the ground, catching his breath, his hands frantically cataloging limbs and appendages and understanding he was fine, he doesn’t find that his fear gives way to anger—his fear wasn’t giving away at all. 

His ears are ringing, which is weird because there had been no actual explosion. The noise came from somewhere—probably a disc if he had to guess—but it was pre-recorded, only a playback of some other detonation, it shouldn’t have nearly been enough to do any real damage. And it didn’t seem to for anyone else either, if the laughter he vaguely hears behind him is any sort of indication. The perpetrators are fine, but even so, Jimmy’s head rocks like there had been a blast, like he needs time to recover. 

No matter how many times he repeats to himself that nothing had happened, that it was just a stupid prank, he can’t seem to calm down. 

A hand touches his arm and he flinches hard, blinking up to find Scott just trying to help him to his feet. “Easy, Jimmy, easy.” Jimmy lets Scott pull him until he’s standing, brushing him off. 

Martyn is still laughing at his own prank, wiping a tear from below his eye, practically wheezing; it’s unclear how much of it is real and how much is for show. “I have gotten a one hundred percent success rate with that,” he brags with a happy sigh, hands out to his sides, inviting them to join in on his praise. “I gotta say, I’m pleased.”  

“What was that noise?” Jimmy asks, but his question goes unanswered. 

“He got me as well,” Scott says, but then he turns to look at Jimmy with a smirk. “But not nearly as aggressively as he got you, Jimmy.” 

Jimmy wants to join them in their amusement, he really does, but his heart rate hasn’t quite recovered yet. He’s embarrassed, almost, to still be feeling it. He blinks a few times hoping to clear something in his brain, begging himself to calm down, to chill out before someone notices. 

But of course, the next thing Martyn says is “Just a music disc Tim, jeez, you alright there?” Not sounding at all actually concerned about Jimmy’s state of being; his deceptively kind words more an excuse to poke at Jimmy’s weak spots than actually inquire about his feelings.

He wants to play it cool, to take the joke as easily as he’s sure the others have, but instead on instinct his shock makes him shove his arm in Martyn’s face, crowing “I’ve got goosebumps, Martyn, look!” 

Martyn draws back in his distaste, his own hand coming up to push Jimmy’s arm back down and away. “Yep, I see that alright, thank you.”

Scott pats Jimmy twice on the shoulder, something he’s quickly getting sick of happening in this sort of context.

“I’ve got a few more people to get with it, though, so—” Martyn says, clearly trying to take his leave now that he did what he came here to. “Actually,” he interrupts himself, “have you seen Grian anywhere?”

Scott shakes his head, “No, I—”

And—maybe just a moment behind—Jimmy understands he means to repeat the prank again, and speaks without really thinking about it or meaning to for the second time today. 

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea, actually.” 

Martyn’s eyes dart away from him and then back again like he's giving some sort of aside to an audience, acknowledging the weirdness of Jimmy’s comment with a 3rd party who’s in on the bit. “Um, what?”

Jimmy ignores the feeling that he’s walking himself into a joke, calling on Martyn to pick him apart like usual—because the feeling of wrong wrong wrong wrong is so much stronger. His ears are still ringing from the explosion that didn’t happen, and he rubs a hand over one of them trying to make it go away before he answers, but for some reason, that only makes it louder. 

He winces, both from the pain and the knowledge that he knows exactly how this conversation is going to go over before he even starts it. 

“I said you oughta stop that.” He tries to be firm, but from the smirk on Martyn’s face, he’s not going to succeed. It makes Jimmy double down, rush the rest of the sentence out of his mouth as quickly as possible, trying to avoid the possibility of being dismissed. “Someone could get seriously hurt!”

“It’s not a real creeper though, is it Timmy?” 

Jimmy feels the helpless frown settle on his face, and the frustration that comes with knowing he's going to lose but not wanting to give up; he acts and speaks with the same level of intensity as he does with everything else, but there's an underlying urgency here that he does not doubt even though he doesn’t quite understand its cause. He doesn’t bother answering Martyn’s question, knowing at least enough to understand that he isn’t meant to. 

“I still don’t think you should be doin’ that though!” He argues, and the worst possible turn the conversation could take begins from there; dismissal of the point that the prank is potentially dangerous for the more amusing idea that Jimmy is a sore participant. 

Martyn rolls his eyes and crosses his arms. “Oh come on,” he drawls. “Take a joke, take a joke…” 

Jimmy groans, “But Martyn, I think th—”

Martyn groans back, “But Timmy!” 

Scott laughs and Jimmy turns to glare at him, giving up on his sentence halfway through. 

Martyn takes the distraction as his leave, already having jogged halfway across the tiny valley by the time Jimmy looks back in his direction. 

“You’re gonna kill someone with that!” Jimmy yells after him, but Martyn is ignoring him and making really exaggerated gestures of goodbye, like he's just given a performance and the crowd is shouting for an encore. He brings both hands to his mouth and blows a kiss to his imaginary admirers, then clasps his hands together giving a large bow; waving, smiling, mouthing thank you. 

Jimmy calls again “I’m serious Martyn!” But his friend fakes a laugh and says “oh, you’re all too kind!” Before disappearing over the crest of the mountain across them.

[baneswood-sins]

all stretched out (Bubba Sawyer/Stretch 3.9k)

Minors DNI, y'all know the drill. I watched TCM2 and fell in love with them. If ya'll're reading this know I was imagining TCM 1 Bubba because he's the cutest <3

Bubba waited for her like he usually did. It was just after midnight, according to his pretty gold watch he got from some meat he butchered a few months previously. Right now she would be signing off and playing the national anthem. He wished he’d brought the portable radio, but Chop Top had been using it and he’d been too scared to bother him. Bubba hoped Stretch would come out soon. Waiting out in the dark next to the radio station was scary and he didn’t like it, but he knew he wasn’t allowed inside when there were other people at the station. Especially not with her new partner, Jimmy. She had sternly warned him to leave the short man alone and he was a good boy, so he did. He still didn’t like that she spent all day with him. Stretch was his girl, not Jimmy’s. He wished he could spend all day with her, but then his family would definitely notice that he was missing. It was hard enough to sneak out only at night. Drayton would get so mad if he knew Bubba was breaking his rules and leaving the house alone, especially to visit a girl. Even if she was a very special girl. He whined to himself, sticking to the shadows of the building—boy, it was lonely out here. 

He didn’t have to wait much longer, though, because it was only a few minutes before Jimmy came out of the building, walking down the stairs toward his car. Bubba watched him pull off into the night and knew it was safe to go inside now. The stairs creaked beneath his considerable weight as he entered the station and headed back to the broadcast room. He couldn’t help but get excited to see Stretch, his pretty girl. And there she was, coffee cup in hand, cleaning up the station. She was wearing those cute shorts that showed off her legs, the ones Bubba liked, and he couldn’t help but come up behind her and wrap her in a hug that had her feet clear off the ground. He squealed happily in her ear, rocking her in his arms. He was making sure not to be too rough, because sometimes, everybody said that he didn’t know his own strength, and the last thing he wanted to do was hurt his precious Stretch.

“Hey there, sugarbear. How’s my big guy doing today?” Stretch asked him, used to his physically affectionate nature. She carefully balanced her coffee as he squeezed her and mostly managed to keep it from spilling on the floor. 

Bubba set her back down on the floor, babbling some happy nonsense about his day that Stretch couldn’t follow but appreciated nonetheless. She turned to look at him and Bubba leaned down, knocking their foreheads together, clucking happily. 

Stretch grinned at him, “Good to hear that, baby. My day was pretty good, too.” She set down her cup of coffee and turned back to him, leaning up on her toes for a kiss. Bubba returned it eagerly, maybe a bit too roughly, but Stretch wasn’t going to complain. They parted with a wet noise and Bubba squealed happily, like she’d put the moon in the sky. “Want to spend the night at my place?” she asked him, already going to collect her purse. 

“Uh-huh,” Bubba replied, and, like the good southern gentleman his Grandma, God bless her soul, had raised, he offered her his arm. She took it with a smile, and they walked out of the station together, only pausing so she could lock up. Stretch led him to her Jeep, letting him climb into the passenger seat, pushing it as far back as it could go so his knees weren’t crammed up against the dashboard. It was better than Drayton’s old truck, where the seats didn’t adjust at all. Bubba strapped in like Stretch always told him to do, watching her climb in the driver’s seat. He’d always wanted to learn how to drive, but Drayton always said he was too stupid to learn. He didn’t think so, though. It seemed simple enough. Maybe Stretch would teach him, like how she was teaching him letters. Stretch was so smart, he loved her so much. 

He couldn’t contain himself any longer, clucking and leaning over to kiss the side of her head as she pulled out onto the road, driving towards her house. “Yeah, darlin’?” Stretch laughed. He wished he could tell her how much he loved her. He’d been practicing by himself, but the words just never came out right. Maybe one day he’d get it right. Then maybe she’d tell him she loved him too! His hands flapped a little, squealing excitedly at the thought of Stretch declaring her love for him. She’d stay with him forever then. 

Stretch shook her head at her kind-of boyfriend’s antics. He was adorable when he really got going, it was so cute to see him excited. Some people might find it offputting, and she had too, at first, but he grew on her quickly. He was just so sweet, despite the fact that she couldn’t really understand him. Maybe she’d pick up a book on American sign language, teach him that along with the basics of reading and writing she was trying to show him. The drive was filled with quiet music from Stretch’s cassette deck, and soon they were pulling up at her little brick house. 

Bubba loved Stretch’s house. It was so cozy and not drafty at all, not like his house. He liked all her soft blankets and the posters on the walls. It could maybe use some bones, like the sculptures Nubbins used to make, but other than that, he thought of it as a second home. He followed Stretch inside, took off his boots along with her, and set them next to the door. Stretch shed her jacket and hung it up with her purse, before turing to Bubba, lifting her hands up to cup his masked cheeks. Bubba whined happily, pushing into her hands, before he was leaning down for a kiss, Stretch meeting him halfway. 

He tried to kiss her the way she liked, slow, without too much tongue or spit, and pulled back to grin when she made a soft noise into his mouth. He was doing good! He leaned in for another one, backing her up until she was pressed against the front door. He boxed her in there, big hands settling on her shoulders, one sliding up to cup her cheek. She tasted like coffee and the chocolate bars she kept stashed at the radio station. It was delicious, and Bubba licked into her mouth, tongue twisting against hers as he tasted her. 

After a few minutes of heated kisses, they separated, Stretch panting and smiling up at Bubba. “Wanna take a bath with me, sugar?” she asked, already knowing his answer. Bubba normally didn’t like baths because they didn’t have hot water at his house, but with Stretch the water was warm and she used a sweet smelling bubble bath, it was so much fun! He nodded at her, already following her back to the master bathroom. The tub was big, well, for a normal person, which meant it was just on the side of normal for Bubba. With Stretch it was a tight fit, but that wasn’t a bad thing. He liked being close to her. 

Stretch ran the water, plugging the tub when it got to the right temperature, and went to search through her cabinet for Bubba’s favorite lavender bubble bath. While she searched, Bubba wasted no time in stripping down and climbing into the tub. The hot water was heaven on his muscles, and the scar on his leg from where the chainsaw had hit him didn’t ache quite so much as it always did. Stretch came back with the bubble bath and saw Bubba lounging in the half-filled tub. “Comfortable, big guy?” she asked, and Bubba only nodded in response, a happy, piglike grunt leaving his lips. She laughed and poured some of the bubble bath in before she stripped down and climbed in with Bubba. 

That was his favorite part of bath time with Stretch. She was so small and warm against him. And soft. Gosh, she was so soft and sweet against him. He hugged her close as the tub filled. She leaned back into him, and Bubba’s large hands cupped her sides, kneading at the skin. She giggled a little, putting her head against his chest to stare up at him. “Careful, Bubba, you know I’m ticklish,” she warned him. He, of course, knew that, that’s why he was tickling her. She squirmed in his grasp, wet and naked and rubbing against him. He felt his cock stir against her back and whined, nuzzling into the back of her head and breathing in the smell of her strawberry shampoo. He paused in his torture and Stretch leaned back against him, panting. She was still giggling, and Bubba couldn’t help but laugh with her. “We’re supposed to be getting clean,” she informed him, grabbing a washcloth and soap as she wiggled around in his arms until she was facing him. Her face was flushed from laughter, and Bubba didn’t try to stop himself from cupping her face in one massive hand and drawing her in for a kiss. 

When they parted, they got to washing in earnest, before the water got too cold. Bubba liked her flowery body wash, liked her hands on him as she washed him. He, of course, returned the favor without question. His dick was getting harder, especially when he massaged her soapy, wet breasts with the cloth, but it was still easy to ignore. Right now was about getting clean, then they could get dirty again. 

Stretch handed him a towel as she stepped out of the bath, grabbing one for herself as well. She dried off, eyeing Bubba as he stepped out of the tub and onto her fuzzy bathmat. She couldn’t help but ogle him as he leaned over to pull the plug in the bath, letting the water drain. He had a nice ass, round and big and a little hairy, but still cute. It made her get ideas about what they could possibly do that night, and she grinned, walking up behind him to slap his ass playfully. 

Bubba jumped, squealing in surprise, and turned to find Stretch smiling at him. It hadn’t been a hard slap, and he’d seen the characters on the TV that Stretch had do the same thing to each other, so he figured it was a normal couple thing. He quickly dried off as Stretch hung up her towel, her slim figure drawing his eye as he watched her hips sway as she walked. Stretch was so beautiful, he was so lucky. 

“Hey, baby,” Stretch began as Bubba hung up his towel too. She could see his half-hard cock bobbing as he walked and licked her lips. “Wanna try something new tonight?” 

Bubba’s head cocked to the side, curious. He loved trying new things with Stretch. So far everything she’d shown him had been so much fun! “Uh-huh,” he replied, following her into the bedroom. He made an inquisitive noise, wondering what she had in mind. 

Stretch sat down on the bed, patting the space next to her, and Bubba followed her command easily, sitting and looking down at her. “You know how you fuck me real good, sugar?” At Bubba’s blush and nod, she continued, “Well I wanna fuck you like that, baby. Is that something you’d be interested in?” 

Bubba’s brow furrowed beneath his mask, confusion evident in his eyes. As far as he knew, Stretch and he didn’t have the right parts to do that sort of thing. It was something he was interested in, but was it possible? He clucked in thought. 

“Here,” Stretch said, getting up and moving over to the cabinet she kept all her toys in. She pulled out some kind of set of straps. She pulled the straps up over her legs and did the buckles. Bubba watched her curiously as she turned back around and rummaged through the cabinet. When she faced him again, the harness was holding one of the fake cocks that Bubba had fucked her with before. Oh. So she could fuck like that, he thought, getting the idea. But where would it go? He didn’t have a soft, pretty cunt like she did (though sometimes he wished he did). As if reading his mind, Stretch stepped back over to the bed, sidling up between his spread legs. “This,” she informed him, “goes in that cute little ass of yours.” 

Bubba’s eyes went wide. Was that a thing people did? Wouldn’t it hurt? He’d tried putting some fingers in before, but always stopped because it felt too uncomfortable. Now she was telling him that she wanted to put one of her toys in him like that? He made an anxious noise, and Stretch backed off immediately. 

“We don’t have to, baby, it was just an idea,” She told him, cupping his masked cheek and leaning in to give him a kiss. She moved to take the harness off, but Bubba caught her hands. He nodded at her, willing to give it a shot. So far she hadn’t suggested anything that he didn’t love, so if she thought it would be fun, he would trust her. “Alright, honey. But you just let me know if I do anything that you don’t like, and we’ll do something else. Now, why don’t you lay back on the bed?” She suggested, and he was quick to obey. She grabbed the bottle of lube she kept next to the bed and climbed up as well. 

He got comfortable in the middle of the bed, spreading his legs when Stretch followed him up and crawled between his spread thighs, fake cock bobbing. Bubba felt his cock twitch at the sight. He wasn’t sure if he was attracted to boys like that, but Stretch looked awfully good with a dick. She laid on her stomach between his legs, and without warning, took his cock into her hands. She stroked him a few times, and Bubba scrambled to grab pillows to prop up his back so he could watch her. He settled back just in time for her to wrap her lips around the head of his cock, and he let out a loud, shaky moan. One of his hands flew to her hair, gripping at the auburn strands. 

Stretch hummed around him, swallowing down more of his cock even though the stretch made her lips burn. He was so thick, it was a struggle to take him into her mouth. She bobbed her head, taking him deeper, tasting clean skin and a little bit of his natural, bitter musk. She pulled back, swirling her tongue around the uncut head of his cock. Before him, she’d never had someone who hadn’t been circumcised. It was different, and so fun to toy with him, since he was so much more sensitive than the other men she’d been with. Like now, as his hand tugged lightly at her hair as she lapped up his salty precum, squealing and moaning and muttering gibberish. One of her hands stroked at the length she couldn’t fit in her mouth, while the other went down to fondle his balls, massaging the soft skin as she worked her way back. She stroked over the skin of his perineum, feather-light, and she would have smiled had her mouth not been full as he jerked and lowed, bovine. Her hands left for a moment and returned wet with lube. She trailed her fingers between the cheeks of his ass, felt over the pucker of his hole, spreading lube over it.

“Now, you tell me if it hurts, okay? It’s okay if you want to stop,” Stretch told him seriously and waited until he recovered enough to nod at her. Then, she enveloped his dick in her mouth as much as she could, massaging the ring of muscle with her pointer finger before slowly slipping the tip inside. Bubba’s squeal cut off into a high-pitched whine, his legs shifting against Stretch’s head, thighs closing in on her. 

He couldn't decide if it was good or bad. It didn’t hurt, but there was pressure somewhere there normally wasn’t. He didn’t want her to stop though. It felt weird, but not bad weird, not yet. He nodded when she met his eye, lips stretched around his cock. The tingly feeling in his gut helped distract him from the way she was moving her finger inside him, slowly sliding it deeper. “You’re doing so good, baby,” she told him when she pulled off for a second to breathe, and he moaned, hips bucking, unintentionally working himself onto her finger more. Stretch grinned at him before she was diving back onto his cock. He barely noticed when she added a second finger, the burn only lasting for a few seconds, and soon she was fucking him with the two digits. He was huffing, working himself back onto her fingers and forward into her mouth, caught between sensations. 

Then, then her fingers curled and scraped against something inside him that had him seeing stars. He yelped, surprised, and moaned when her fingers dragged over that spot again. He squealed at the feeling of heat pooling in his belly, his thighs closing around her head, legs crossed over her back as he tried to ground himself. Stretch swallowed his cock deeper, working a third and final finger in when he was distracted, and this time he thought the burn felt good. He didn’t like pain, but this was okay. Those three fingers curled in him and he let out a choked-off scream, body shaking as Stretch forced him over the edge. He came down her throat, trying not to roll his hips too hard into the wet heat of her mouth. He didn’t entirely succeed, but Stretch liked it when he was a little rough. She swallowed down his cum, gently stroking him to milk as much as she could before she pulled off, watching him collapse back against the bed. 

“Was that good?” she asked, laying on top of his soft belly and chest, fingers carding through the dark curls of his chest hair. Bubba nodded enthusiastically, still panting. He folded his arms around her, engulfing her in a hug. He nuzzled at her head, pressing kisses into her hair. After he’d sufficiently recovered, Stretch pushed up so she could look him in the eyes. He looked at her, his eyes big and brown and bovine, full of trust, and she couldn’t help but smile. “Want to continue, sugar?” she asked, “Want me to fuck you, baby?” 

Bubba nodded, “Uh-huh.” He let her go when she wiggled in his arms, sliding down his torso until she was between his thighs again. This time, she rested on her knees, sitting back on her heels. She grabbed the lube, slicking up the fake cock with a few strokes. Bubba’s eyes were drawn to it inexorably. It wasn’t big, but it still made him nervous. It was certainly a little thicker, and definitely longer than Stretch’s fingers had been. He whined nervously, but spread his legs a little more so she could scoot forward until his ample ass was in her lap. 

“Ready, hun?” she asked, guiding the tip of the fake cock to his loose hole. Bubba nodded, feeling a little scared, but not scared enough to quit. He felt it against him and whined as it pushed in. It burned a little, but barely. It was easily ignorable, and he grasped and Stretch, pulling her down for a kiss while she fucked into him nice and slow. She gave him time to adjust before slipping deeper, kissing him wet and open-mouthed. “You’re doing so good, Bubba,” she told him as she bottomed out. She could feel herself dripping wetly onto her inner thighs. God, he looked good spread out for her like that. 

“How does that feel?” she asked him, smiling when he replied with his nonsense. It sounded positive, though, so she experimentally rolled her hips, beaming when he moaned low, back arching. It felt deep, now, deeper than her fingers had been, and made his stomach feel weird and tense. His cock was getting hard again, and he reached a hand down to tug on it, trying to relieve the pressure in his gut. “That’s it, baby, touch yourself,” Stretch said, and started fucking him in earnest. Bubba bit his lip, his oddly-pointed teeth cutting into the skin as he bounced and moaned on her lap. He mumbled out something that sounded suspiciously like her name, long eyelashes fluttering. 

“Good boy,” she told him, and he moaned and jerked, grinding down onto her cock. It felt so good, like his insides were molten and he was going to come so fast, but he couldn’t help it. Hopefully, Stretch would forgive him. He stroked his cock faster, feeling something coil in his stomach as she fucked him, snapping her hips forward hard enough that their skin slapped together. He pulled her into another kiss as he came all over his fist, desperately moaning into her open mouth. She slowed down the thrusts, fucking him gently as he came off the high of his second orgasm.

Stretch pulled out just as slowly as she went in, undoing the straps and taking off the harness so she could drop it over the edge of the bed to be worried about later. Bubba was shaking, and Stretch was surprised he’d lasted as long as he did. Honestly, she was glad he’d cum so fast, because she was desperate to get off, herself. Bubba’s hands reached for her, guiding her up and up until she was straddling his neck. Her cunt rubbed wetly on his skin, leaving a trail of slick, and if Bubba thought he was capable of it, his cock would be getting hard again at the feeling. 

Instead, he undid the straps that held on his mask. He couldn’t eat her out like he liked with it on, the metal parts around his mouth got in the way. He tugged it off and tried to pull her forward as fast as he could to ignore the feeling of air on his face. She settled over him easily, and his nose bumped against her clit as he started to sloppily lick at her. Her hands settled in his curly brown hair, tugging at the strands as she ground herself onto his fat tongue. Bubba moaned at her taste, salty and tangy and perfect, and pointed his tongue to tease inside her like she liked, feeling her spongey walls with the slick appendage. 

“Fuck, Bubba, yes,” Stretch moaned, clenching around his tongue. He was so good as this, so perfect for her. “God, baby, you make me feel so good.” 

Bubba squealed against her before he withdrew and closed his lips around her clit, the tip of his tongue teasing at the little nub until she was squirming on his face, knees threatening to crush his head as she came, grinding herself against him as her juices dripped down his face. He continued licking at her, cleaning her up until she couldn’t stand the stimulation, drawing off of him as she reached over for a cloth and handed it to him so he could wipe the wetness off his face. She smiled at him as he put his mask back on, sliding down so she could kiss him again, not minding the taste of herself on his tongue. 

“Well, look at that, baby, we’re all dirty again. You feel like another bath?”

[magisteramentia]

Hypnovember #10 - Recruit

The streets were cold, but Sandy endured. Dressed in the uniform of her church she handed out pamphlets on a corner.

Despite so many men stopping by to talk to her (and even a few girls), few stayed after she began talking to them about the church. One of those few was the boy she was talking to right now. She had to admit he was cute but she could not quite remember his name, was it Oliver? Jimmy? She could not remember, but he was attentive and respectful unlike many others that had tried to grab her ass under her miniskirt.

He was quite interested in her faith, so she leaned, pressing her breasts against his arm.

“What do you say I bring you to my church and we can talk in depth about this?” She said with a smile.

“Sure,” He wore such a cute smile that made Sandy quiver in her legs.

“This way.” She led the way without letting go of his arm. It was a short walk until she found the backdoor of the church’s auditorium.

“Is this the right way?” He asked going past the alley as Sandy struggled to open the door.

“Yes, the entrance is being renewed, don’t worry about it.” She opened the door and led him to a small waiting room.

“Are you comfortable?” Sandy walked past him, “This wont take long, do you want something to drink?”

“A bottle of water would be nice..” He looked around trying to find any sort of religious imagery or anything that would help him determine where he was, an alarm was sounding in his head, but still Sandy was cute, so the risk might be worth it as long as he didn’t get sacrificed or someone stole a kidney.

He sat down on a couch and looked at Sandy bending down to pick up a bottle of water from a mini fridge.

She didn’t so much walk as she strutted his way.

She opened the water bottle in front of him.

“Say, what do you mean this wont take long?” He asked reaching for the water bottle.

“This,” She said and grabbed his hand, leading it to her chest. “It usually doesn’t take long for someone to convert once they get to know me.”

Sandy took a gulp from the water bottle and straddled him, leaving the bottle aside she grabbed his face and kissed him, making him drink from her lips.

“I mean, wouldn’t you like to join our church? We could enjoy this feeling everyday.” She said breaking the kiss and pulling off the sweater to reveal she was wearing nothing underneath.

“You could learn to enjoy this freedom,” Sandy unbuttoned his shirt, “you would not have to worry about anything but this feeling…”

Her hands reached between his legs, his member was already straining his pants. She reached, her hands were a bit cold, but it was a pleasant sensation. Sandy leaned closer, whispering, “You could just focus on this, pleasure.”

Stroking him slowly, she took another sip from the water bottle and made him drink some more.

“What do you think?” Her voice was like silk, like smoke, slithering inside his brain.

“Think?” He said, trying to make sense of what was happening right there and then.

Sandy grabbed his cock, he was hard and hot, she guided him and he noticed she was not wearing panties anymore, her wet sex against his skin felt warm and inviting.

“Yes, what do you think? Would you like to join us?” Sandy rubbed her pussy against his cock.

He strained to link his thoughts together.

“Join you?”

“Yes, my master, my sisters, you are the first man that has come in some time.”

“Come…”

“Yes, come, do you want to come?” Her voice echoed, it wasn’t loud but it was the only thing that he could think of.

“I want… I want to…” it was getting harder to think.

“Here, let me help you,” Sandy took another sip and made him drink for her lips. Each sip was better than the last, her tongue dancing inside his mouth.

“do you want to come?” She said breaking the kiss.

Sandy rose a little bit, with her hand she guided his member inside her pussy.

He groaned.

“I want to come…”

“You want to join us.” Sandy said, rocking her body on his cock.

“I want to join you.”

Sandy smiled.

“You want to submit.”

“I want to submit.” He

“Focus on this pleasure.”

“Focus on the pleasure.”

“You will submit to master.”

“I will submit to Master.”

His thoughts became her voice. It was all that mattered.

Sandy licked her lips. So close, she rubbed her clit.

“You will obey master.”

“I will obey master.”

“You will obey me.”

“I will obey.” He mustered, his mind reeling with the overwhelming sensation.

Focusing on Sandy’s voice.

Focusing on her breasts.

She rocked his body, leading him closer.

“You will suck his cock if he wants you.”

“I’ll suck his cock.”

“You will bring your friends here, you will make them like you. Like me.”

“I’ll bring them, make them like us.”

“Good boy.”

Sandy grabbed his face, kissing him.

He groaned.

“And you will cum for me.”

He felt his body tense up. His cock twitch inside Sandy.

He felt his heart beat faster. He felt his whole body trembling and his cock releasing his cum inside his mistress.

He was a good boy.

“Good boy,” She said into his ear. “I know it felt good, but this is just the first one, it will feel even better when you bring us your friends to join us.”

“Yes. Mistress.”

“Mistress…” Sandy rose up, her pussy leaking. She grabbed a dollop of cum from between her legs and tasted it, “I like that…”

[owtenen]

Ranching (pt 2)

Tango and Jimmy start to get settled, but things take a turn

(pt 1 technically HERE) (AO3)

TWs: depictions of anxiety/anxiety attack symptoms and blood. know and be responsible for your triggers. (nothing extremely graphic)

————

Jimmy hates how this is making him feel.

He feels stupid. He feels ridiculous. He feels upset. The worst part though? The worst part is that he knows Tango can feel all of it too.

He knows he can feel Jimmy’s heart start to race in anxiety when he trips over a loose patch of dirt. He knows he can feel the painful pinpricks behind his eyes as he holds tears back. He knows he can feel the grinding of his teeth as he tries to stand up straight in front of his friends.

He knows Tango can feel all of it, not just because he can feel all of what Tango is feeling, but he can also see the way Tango is looking at him.

It’s with pity. It took a couple hours to figure out what the look meant, but once he did, he wouldn’t dare look at Tango in the eyes again.

Because of course his soulmate would think he was an idiot. It was what everyone else thought. Of course he would burden this random person with all of the weight of being his partner.

The idiot, the clumsy one, the curse. He had heard it all from everyone else, and whenever he looked at Tango’s face for too long when he had that look, it made all those words come flooding back.

Tango hadn’t really talked since they first met, and Jimmy just knew it was because he was mad. Jimmy knew that it was because Tango already was regretting being in this game. Tango wished he was with someone else, Jimmy could see it in his eyes. Those red eyes that were so soft with pity. Those eyes that were hard with frustration.

Jimmy felt sick again, and he went behind a tree to do some breathing exercises. He saw Tango out of the corner of his eye watch him go, and Jimmy was thankful that he didn’t catch those eyes as he went off.

He took a deep breath in, pushing his palm into his chest to ease the tension there. When he breathed out, he tried to focus all of the air into one single spot, going and going until his eyes clouded and there was nothing left. He started absently pressing his fingernails into his palms and chewing on the inside of his mouth. Maybe he could talk to Grian about a way to get rid of the bond. Maybe he could beg and beg for Grian to let him leave the game and keep Tango in. Maybe-

“Jimmy?”

Jimmy’s heart stopped beating completely, he could tell because there was only one heartbeat in his chest. He screwed his eyes tighter shut, maybe if he didn’t say anything, the voice would go away.

After a few moments, the voice called out again with a hint of laughter, “I didn’t know we were playing hide and seek.”

Tango’s voice was low and rumbly, like gravel cascading across exposed rock. Jimmy could tell he was close, but that didn’t stop him from staying silent.

Eventually, the foot steps of his soulmate stopped, and he felt soft, warm breath on his face and an unnaturally warm body next to his. “Found ya.” He flinched at the sound, but opened one of his eyes to see Tango staring back at him, those red eyes staring at him in the same horrible way they always did.

Idiot. Stupid. Curse

“H-“ his voice cracked, he cringed. “Hi, Tango.”

“Hey there.” It was awkward, and Jimmy wanted to melt into the tree he was leaning on. “Are you….” Tango’s question faded off into nothing as his eyes fell onto Jimmy’s hands. Jimmy followed his gaze and felt sick all over again.

His fingernails were covered in blood, and when Jimmy opened his hands, he saw small half moons indented into his palms. Had he really been clutching that hard? He glanced at Tango’s hands, and watched with a growing sense of embarrassment as he rubbed his own palms with his thumbs. Tango could feel Jimmy’s pain. Jimmy had hurt Tango.

“I-“ Jimmy felt the panic rise up. Tango was going to yell at him. He was going to scream. Demand that he get over himself and figure out a way to break their bond. “I’m so sorry Tango, I didn’t realize what I was doing-“

“Hey.” Tango’s voice was calm but firm, and it shut Jimmy up right away. “It’s alright. Here.” He pulled out a small cloth from his vest pocket, extending it to Jimmy. “It’s wet so…. Tango shrugged, “Should be able to clean it off.”

Jimmy hesitantly took the wet cloth, “Why do you have this?”

Tango shrugged again, “It’s for when I’m working. I might uh….” He cracked a small smile. “Sometimes I get a little too excited and set things on fire.”

Jimmy looked away from Tango’s face and focused on his hands, gently wiping away the blood and dirt. He hissed in pain when he pressed to hard, and he could feel Tango bite his tongue too.

“I’m… so sorry.” It was all Jimmy could say. Tango had to know how sorry he was about everything.

“For what?” Jimmy went to respond but the words never came. There was too much to be sorry for.”

“For having to deal with this.” He raised his hands a little, but he hoped Tango knew what he meant.

Tango just shook his head, “It’s cool, man. Do you need anything?” He looked around the area that they were at, as if this was just a normal conversation.

How was Tango so calm about this? Was he just pretending? Jimmy felt confused, “Uh… no, sorry.” He handed back Tango’s cloth awkwardly, and felt a jolt of warmth when they touched hands. “We can go back.”

Tango just smiled and took the cloth, putting it right back in the same pocket he had it before. “Alright. I made a trench for the water to go through so all we have to do if plant the seeds.”

He raised his hand and only stopped for a second when Jimmy flinched. He was going to hit him. He was going to finally get out all his anger. He was going to-

He was just going to pat Jimmy’s shoulder, and he watched with wide eyes as Tango just winked and walked away, leaving Jimmy alone again against the tree, thoughts racing a million miles an hour.

~

Tango focused really hard on his breathing as he walked away. Jimmy’s heart rate was sky high, and he knew if Jimmy could feel his heart beat fast too, it would just make things worse.

He rubbed his thumbs over his palms again, and a shiver went up his spine as he remembered the horrified look on Jimmy’s face when he realized what he had done.

It had made Tango want to wrap him in his arms and rub his back. It made him want to run hands through his wings and tell him everything would be alright.

“I’m back.” Jimmy’s voice sounded defeated, and his posture seemed to say the same.

Tango smiled at him, hoping that it would bring his soulmate some comfort. If only Jimmy would look at him…

“Here, catch!” Tango through a pack of seeds at Jimmy and watched as he clumsily caught it with his forearms. “Nicely done.” He scooted to the side, hoping he would get the message and come over.

Jimmy just stood there for a moment, and after the gears behind his eyes slowed down, he just squatted where he was sitting and began planting, away from Tango and shut off.

Why wasn’t Jimmy talking to him? He had been so normal about their situation, their relationship. While Tango himself didn’t have anxiety, his friends did, and back on Hermitcraft he had learned what helped them.

For Impulse, it would be planning and testing. Whenever Impulse got stressed about a build, or a piece of wiring that he couldn’t quite figure out, Tango would sit down with him and talk through a plan. They would test and strategize, and eventually Impulse’s anxiety would go away because he was no longer as in the dark as he once was.

But that strategy wasn’t working with Jimmy. Every time he tried to plan something with his soulmate, Jimmy’s shoulders would drop, and he would do what he was told without any hesitation or additions.

He thought about Zedaph’s anxiety. How the sheep-hybrid would just ask Tango to keep moving forward. Zed would get more anxious when Tango stopped to talk about it, and it really helped his friend when he just pretended like nothing was wrong.

But Jimmy seemed to get more upset and confused when Tango did that. When he clapped his shoulder, it took all of Tango’s strength not to pull away when the man flinched.

What did Jimmy need? He looked up to watch Jimmy planting the grass, the man was biting his lip, and he was laser focused on the task he was trying to accomplish. Tango’s eyes moved from his face to his hands and back again, making a trail around his arms and shoulders eventually landing on his wings.

“You’re wings are so cool.” Tango didn’t even mean to say it out loud.

Jimmy looked up at Tango and then looked back down again, his cheeks quickly turning bright red. Despite that, Jimmy’s wings seemed to involuntarily puff out behind him, and Tango smiled as the wind blew through the feathers. “Thank you….”

“Can you fly?” Tango knew about avian-hybrids from being on Hermitcraft, but he has never actually seen one fly during the death games.

He saw Jimmy’s soft smile turn into a frown, “Not here, they clipped me.” Jimmy’s right wing slowly extended farther out, and Tango’s eyes landed on the large, yet cut, primary feathers. Tango didn’t know much, but he felt a little bit of anger pool in his stomach, “Who would do that?”

“Grian… he felt it was unfair if we could fly.” Jimmy retracted his wings, and Tango focused on the ground again.

“Skizz never said anything about clipping….”

Jimmy sat back, and Tango watched as he looked up longingly at the sky, “Skizz has different wings, so they can’t be clipped.” Tango gave Jimmy a confused look, and Jimmy took a moment to think, “So there’s different types of wings, avian wings- the ones that Grian and I have- are like bird wings. They can be clipped, they can get messy, they can be-“ Jimmy shivered before he finished, “removed.”

Tango just nodded, this was the first time he had heard his soulmate speak for more than a few second, and he was soaking up every second of it.

“But there’s other people who have different types of wings, like Skizz for example has angel wings, so they can’t really be tampered with. Angel-winged Avians usually are part of a larger group and choose not to fly or use their wings for harmful purposes.” Tango had never asked Skizz why he didn’t fly, but he suspected that Jimmy was right. “There’s other types too, like Vex wings and stuff, but…. yeah.”

Tango was fully leaning forward on his knees, “And why are yours yellow?”

Jimmy frowned again, pushing his fingers into the dirt, “They are canary wings. I got them after third life.” Tango made a confused look again, remembering back to the first games. He realized that Jimmy didn’t have wings during that game, not that he had thought anything of it.

“Well..” Tango coughed, standing up and walking over to Jimmy. “I think they’re beautiful.”

He watched with a smile as Jimmy went bright red again and started stammering, trying to get out a word. He held out his hand and helped him up off the ground, “What if we built a ranch?”

“A ranch?”

“Yeah! We could have all the animals and never have to worry about food.”

Jimmy pressed his lips together and thought about it. After a moment, he looked back over to Tango and gave him a small smile, “Alright, Tango. I think that’s a great idea.”

—————

It’s giving Problem of Etho vibes. maybe this is a spin-off. giving tango and jimmy trauma and backstory to maybe resolve it later oops !

[ladyelainehilfur]

Weaktober Day 6: Swan

Jimmy’s hands were going to turn pruney at this rate. He’d been in the water for over thirty minutes, wallowing in the shallow end, caught up in his thoughts. It was seven o’clock, almost dusk. Uncle Jin would’ve started calling out the ranch hands to look for him, but Jimmy had already told him not to wait up and have dinner without him. His uncle didn’t protest, but Jimmy still felt bad.

He just needed time to think. The lake at the edge of the property was always deserted, so it ended up becoming his go-to area when he craved silence and solidarity. At that time of day, he could hear the frogs getting back on their BS, and the birds in the tree finally simmering down. The swishing sound of the fish in the water was a constant but Jimmy minded that less. It was still sunny out but he hid under the shade of the large rock that hovered over a corner of the lake.

He dragged himself out of the water and enjoyed the cool wind hitting the wet surface of his skin. He shook out his hair, and started making his way back up to the top of the rock. It wasn’t steep but there were many areas where the rock wasn’t as smooth and he had to avoid scraping his legs as he’d done multiple times since discovering the lake.

At the pinnacle of it, he stood next to the only other person he’d let into his private expanse. Lily was also wearing a bathing suit, but she had no intention of swimming. 

“You don’t have to leave unless you want to,” she said, gazing out over the lake. Lily wasn’t the sort to sit around and waste time. She was there to help him make up his mind.

“I can’t just leave Uncle to do all this by himself,” he said, rubbing his face with his hands. “He’s going to retire really soon and if I’m not here to take care of the ranch, I need to choose one of the ranch hands to do it.” He laughed morosely. “Dude, you should see the fights at the stakeholder meetings. It’s like the presidential election or something.”

Lily laughed and beckoned for him to sit next to her on the ledge of the rock, which he did. “Have you heard that phrase about swans?” she asked.

“No,” he murmured.

She hummed. “Even though you pretend like everything is fine on the top side, you’re swimming as hard as you can underneath. I don’t think even your uncle realizes how much work you’re putting into making the ownership transfer as easy as possible.”

“I’m not trying to advertise it,” he said.

She nodded. “I know. But I’m proud of you. You’re doing amazing, sweetie.”

Jimmy snorted and she grinned back, reaching over to run her fingers through his bangs. His heart decided to be stupid and skip a beat, so he quickly leaned over to kiss her on the corner of her mouth. Her subsequent smile was so brilliant that Jimmy had to stand up so she couldn’t see the flush rising on his face. 

“One more dive before we head back?” she asked.

“Yeah,” Jimmy replied, clearing his throat.  He stepped off the edge and flew through the air before slicing through the water, leaving nothing on the surface but ripples and unanswered questions. 

[moooxy]

hiiii! when your back from your holiday are you able to do smut for hopper like reader rides him and he starts smoking during it all the while he’s praising reader? really specific ik but like i think it’s hot.

Oh I agree

This correlates with my mean!Hopper infatuation.

He’s probably got you on top of him, looking bored out of his mind whilst you pathetically attempt to get him off. Any other boy your age would have came minutes ago, but it looked like you were barely affecting Hopper. You were riding him, no longer chasing your own high when the recurring thought in the back of your mind was - is he enjoying it? He certainly didn’t look like he was, but surely any sexually active man would enjoy a tight pussy bouncing on their cock.

“Hop’,” you breathily whine. “Please—“ he silences you by pushing his thumb in your mouth. You suck him, and he sighs.

“Be fuckin’ quiet,” he growls, moving his thumb around. Your tongue chases it, eyebrows furrowing as you pout at his meanness. Your hips slow when you see him reach into his pocket, pulling out his worn box of Marlboro. His thumb leaves your mouth to fiddle with a cigarette, he lights it and you completely halt your movement.

“I can’t anymore, Jimmy,” you whine, back arching as your face presses into his neck.

“What can’t you do, baby?” He asks you. He asks you like he’s not rock-fucking hard inside of you. Like you’re not on top of him. He asks you like you’re sitting at a dinner table complaining about your day at work. “Thought you wanted to be good f’me?”

“I’m trying— It’s too hard—“

He takes a long drag of the cigarette, ash falling onto his sand-coloured shirt. “Come on, Honey. You wanna make daddy proud? Keep squeezin’ me— yeah, just like’at.”

Now that you’ve acknowledged his lack of presence, he’s back to normal. He’s back to the normal soft, praising Hopper who loves nothing more than when you try to get him off.

“Shit, girl. Watchin’ you fuck yourself on me is just about the hottest damned thing I’ve ever seen…” he gasps. His cigarette is stubbed out using the ashtray on your bedside table and his hands are situated back on your hips. They’re strong, they guide you. “There she is. Atta’girl. Look’t you, once you’ve been given attention you’re just the most desperate thing alive.”

[drakenology]

the yakuza wife - yakuzaboss!bakugo x housewife reader - inspired by @hanji-is-life ‘s sexy ass. 

yakuza au

tw: violence, sadism, mentions of blood, smut, cum, cussing, daddy/ddlg kinks undertones, mentions of guns, very much harley quinn and joker only joker actually loves harley in this ya know?

“where the fuck is my money?” bakugo asks this bludgeoned man tied up to a metal chair in some god forsaken warehouse god only knows where. 

“please sir, i’ll get it to you as soon as I can! please stop!” the man pleads, flinching when bakugo raises his fist to land a mean left hook into his jaw with a dark chuckle. 

“you know you shouldn’t borrow from people if you have no intentions in payin’ em back. it’s fuckin’..” he pauses before taking a crowbar and bashing the man in both his knees, blood curdling screams filling the empty space. “rude!”

bakugo smirks as the man begs for mercy, pulling a set of pliers of his pocket and holding them up to the man’s face to tease him, grabbing by his neck to make him meet his intimidating gaze. 

“shoulda thought of that before trying to playing me for a fuckin’ fool.. hey, I wonder how many teeth I can pull outta ya before your weak ass passes out.” he grunts, waving the plier in his face until the sound of his phone ringing stops him from doing anything.

“you’re lucky I gotta take this.” he mumbles, taking a piece of dirty cloth and shoving it into his mouth to keep him quiet.

bakugo turns away and rolls up his sleeve, setting up his tools for torture as he answers the phone. 

“hi baby!” you chime, at the mall having the time of your life with his credit card. 

“hey. ‘m workin’ whaddaya want?” he says, holding up his pliers and sitting them down on the table as his hostage screams in the background. 

“just checking on you, dummy! whatcha want for dinner, hm? i know you haven’t eaten yet.” you say, holding up different dresses to your frame to imagine yourself in them. “hey, pink or powder blue?”

“pink. and ‘m not hungry. you’ve got security with you, right baby?” he asks, kicking the man onto the floor with a loud thud. 

“of course. you won’t let me leave the house without them.” you respond, not even paying attention to the muffled screams you hear in the background. you’ve learned not to ask too many questions when it comes to being a yakuza wife. 

“gotta keep my baby safe, right? listen, princess I gotta go. i’ll be home before 9 okay?” 

you suck your teeth and roll your eyes, “fine. be careful okay?”

“always am. love you baby.” as he hangs up and returns to his task. 

the difference between you and katsuki was night and day. everyone knew you to be so sweet and kind; unbeknownst to them all how you ended up with a cretin like Bakugo. even though Katsuki was immoral in many ways, he knew marrying you was the right thing to do. who else would want to dress his wounds and pick out his suits for the day?

katsuki demanded you quit your job. in fact he came with you to put in your two weeks notice, tough scowl staining his features as your boss signed the approval with shaking hands.

from that day on he ensured you were well taken care of and that marrying him and becoming his housewife came with many perks.

for starters, your husband was loaded. all those years of extorting and money laundering paid off every time you come home with a couple shopping bags from the mall.

katsuki loved lavishing you in the finest of everything, adoring how you look in designer. so much so, he fucks you by the bay window of your luxury penthouse, the Chanel dress he just bought you hiked up over your ass as his calloused fingers make way into your mouth. you’re pinned to the glass, bare breasts pressed against the window as he railed you from behind. and he wonders why you turned out to be a spoiled brat.

your gifts always made you stand out above the rest. many men fawn over you and he knows this. just a small price to pay for having a fine ass wife. but if anyone ever forgot their place, if anyone ever got to close. well. that’d be the last time you’d ever see them. course you have no idea why. but even though katsuki loved you with all his heart, you could be a real pain in the ass. you were so bratty, especially when he was busy. 

one day you came trotting into his office in the middle of some business deal. whatever. your jimmy choos popped and you needed a new pair before the yacht party you were attending started. 

“daddy’s taking care of business right now, okay? go wait outside.”

“no! you promised we’d go shopping! I need new shoes what the fuck am I supposed to do with these?” you whine, pouting like usual to get your way. bakugo’s brow raised, walking towards you and gesturing for the meeting to continue without him. his hand rested on your lower back as he escorted you out.  

he fucked your brains in in the next room for disobeying him, panties around your ankles, your charm anklet jingling as he picked up your legs. 

“spoiled fuckin’ brat. told you to wait didn’t I? hm? or did you make a scene ‘cause you wanted my dick?” your head hangs back as your hips are held down by him, thrusts brutal as you cry for him to slow down, face turned away from his. he grabs your chin and turns you around harshly with his scarred and calloused hands, bruised knuckles turning white with a tight grip. 

“look at me when i’m fuckin’ talkin’ to you.” 

he came inside you when he was done, pulling your panties up for you as it dripped down your leg. 

“now.. back to what I was doin’. tell the driver to take your ass home.” he huffs with a zip of his pants and a shake in his sleeves to fix them. bakugo leaves you on the desk, leaving the door cracked for you to leave when you got yourself together. and when you did you could hardly hold yourself up, holding your high heels in your hand as you limp to the car waiting outside for you. 

having a yakuza boss as a husband was always exciting. something in you liked the danger; the thrill.

you tell this tale to your other socialite girlfriends and they almost never believe you.

you were out with bakugo on a date when work called. to your dismay, he had to get up and leave. you insisted on being brought along, hating being left alone in that big house that was often empty without him. he agreed but only if you promised to be quiet like a good little girl. 

when you arrive at some warehouse (the same one mentioned earlier), a man was already hog tied on the ground, muffled screams behind a piece of duck tape as bakugo ripped it off. you sat by a table, legs folded in annoyance. this interrupted date night? you scoff and fold your arms. 

“ah. good seeing you old friend. remember me?” he asks, taunting him a little with a gun in his hand pressing it against his jaw as the man let out muffled pleas for him not to shoot. 

“you tried stealing from me. fuckin’ idiot. my boys caught you in some hotel with your little girlfriend. did you think you were gonna have a victory fuck after you made off with my money, hm?” bakugo asks, hitting him upside the head with the butt of his pistol.

you jump at the sound of the blow, a small part of you turned on watching your husband beat the crap out of a complete stranger. your pussy starts to ache when you peer over at bakugo’s strong tattooed arms as he flung his jacket aside, rolling his white sleeves up to ensure his expensive suit doesn’t get soiled. 

“oh fuck, where are my manners? this is my lovely wife, y/n. say hi baby.” he coos at you, a switch from rough to gentle when he spoke to you. you smile and wave, the hostage sobbing out a weak greeting when bakugo demands him to. 

“anyways. what’d you do with the money, asswipe? gonna tell me or are you gonna make me fuck you up in front of my pretty wife. god, look at ‘er, ain’t she gorgeous? you know I was about 30 minutes from railing her before you had to go along and ruin our night. I should kill you right here.” bakugo turns his head towards you with a sick look in his eye. 

“whaddaya think, princess? what should I do to this motherfucker, huh?” he asks. 

“smack him again. he ruined date night.” you grumble, folding your arms. 

“he sure did, baby.” bakugo says, punching the hostage in his jaw. he gestured for his men to crowd around him, all of them taking turns kicking and beating him with metal bars. katsuki walks towards you and pulls you into a passionate kiss, a bit of blood on his knuckles as he pulled your hair. god, this whole situation was sick. but why was it so hot?

bakugo carries you away to the car, tells the driver to fuck off somewhere while he rails you in the back seat, knowing his men will take care of the rest of what he started inside the warehouse. you straddle his lap, bouncing up and down on his stiff cock as the car rocked back and forth. the car windows fog up as your body heat commingled throughout the space, your hands pressing against the glass to gain to balance as you rode his fat cock. 

“fuck, daddy. you’re so hot when you’re handling business. ooh, you’re dick’s so hard.” you purr, bakugo’s hand pinching and playing with your breast as his hips thrust upwards. He smirks at you, almost a bit shocked you got as turned on as he did from the pain he inflicted.

“hmm, I know baby. god, you’re sick. getting this wet from watching me beat up some punk. dirty fuckin’ girl.” he huffed into your hair, leaving sloppy kisses on your neck followed by harsh nibbles.

truth is even though you were so sweet and caring, you had a dark side no one knew about. I mean why else would you marry into the yakuza? 

you were both fucking insane. 

[sorryjustafangirl]

what home is

a/n: this is my submission for @antoineroussel 's summer fic exchange 2k21! thank you for organizing this all demi. i recieved @timstuetzle and i am so excited to finally share this! im sorry it's so late but i had a lot of fun writing for Tim and i hope i did him justice! i made this a gender neutral reader again, so please enjoy my take on some friends to enemies to lovers :)

pairing: tim stützle x reader

word count: 18k+ (holey moley)

warnings: some angst, set in no covid-universe, a few swears, an odd timeline

disclaimer: this is a work of fiction and real person fiction if you don’t like that, please don’t read! the banner is made by me, with photos found from pinterest and the transparent made by @art-and-the-hockeys (thank you!!!)

The start of the season was your favourite. The chill of the rink, the sound of skate edges on the ice, the smell of skate sharpening- it was all so familiar. As an analyst, the start was the best. There were new lineups, new plays, and a chance to try new things. Considering this was your first year as a real analyst, not just checking over others' work, you were excited. You got to actually help to build a Stanley Cup winning team.

What you didn’t love was how everyone seemed to lose their heads and decide to run around the arena. You’d been looking for the coach of the Ottawa Senators for the past twenty minutes. You’d think the man would be in his office the first day back, but no. He decides to take a stroll to who-knows-where and leaves you to follow invisible breadcrumbs.

Eventually, you found yourself on one of the lower levels. You continued down the hallway, entering an open space with concrete floors. The bustle of the new season was in full swing as you swerved between various people working like gears in a machine. You tried to do your best to stay out of other people’s way but you still ended up walking into a hard surface.

“Oof!” Shit. Hard surfaces don’t usually talk. You looked up at what you ran into and saw two men staring at you. Both were wearing Senators hoodies but one was a taller blond and the other a slightly shorter brunet. The brunet has a backwards snapback on but that wasn't what made you stop in your tracks. It was his eyes. They were soft and welcoming, something like a home cooked meal, but they had a glint of adventure in them.

“Oh my gosh, I am so sorry! I wasn’t really looking where I was going. I am so sorry.” You apologized to the blond you ran into.

“Hey, all good. I’m-”

“Number 7.” You turned toward the brunet. “And...number 18, right?” When they both gave you a weird look, you shrugged. “I’m an analyst here so, uh, you’re just numbers to me.”

“Okay, ouch but you are the reason we’re going to be winning more games this season, so I'll give it to you. I’m Brady, and this is Jimmy.” The blond gestured to himself first, before gesturing beside him.

“It’s Tim, actually.”

You introduced yourself to the two players, before looking around the hallways. “Um, would either of you happen to know where the coach is? I can’t find him,” You held up the file folders in your hands. “I’ve got new numbers for him.”

“Oh yeah he’s probably close to the ice, we’ll show you.” Brady started down a hallway, both you and Tim falling in stride behind him. “So Numbers-”

“-Y/n-” You glared at Brady for the nickname, rolling your eyes as he continued on. From your peripheral vision, you saw the corners of Tim's mouth turn up.

“-If you don’t mind me saying….either you look really good for your age, or you aren’t old enough to be working here,” He continued, giving a glance your way.

You looked down at your shoes and gave a sigh. “I get that a lot, and I am young-er than my colleagues but I assure you, I am qualified to work for this organization.”

“Wasn’t doubting that, just seeing how much I get to tease ya. Jimmy’s the rookie,” He elbowed him and Tim tried to swerve around it, only to bump into a stack of pylons. Brady and you shared a grin at his expense. “So he gets all the teasing. Same for the numbers people. You’re the rookie.” He shrugged

“Well, I’m not actually a rookie anymore. This is my second year here,” You mentioned, looking towards the two guys. Brady looked impressed whereas Tim’s eyes went large and his jaw slack a little.

“How?” He asked, and you laughed. The three of you turned a corner, and you walked slightly faster to talk.

“I graduated high school pretty early. And then took my statistics undergrad at the University of Ottawa. I minored in sports studies and I met your GM at a conference for the department. When he found out I was in Ottawa alone, he kinda took me under his wing, checked in every now and again. When I graduated two years ago, he offered me an analyst position and I was lucky enough to land it. I love working here, even if I’m way younger than everyone else. Last year, I stayed in my office a lot, double checking people’s work but this year, they gave me more responsibility. I’m excited for the challenge.”

“You are going to be great.” Tim said, meeting your eyes, his gaze showing that his comment was genuine. You ducked away from his gaze but muttered a ‘thanks’. The three of you rounded another corner, Brady ducking out to talk to a reporter, but Tim said he’d help you find the coach.

You settled into a comfortable silence as you walked beside each other through the chilled hallways. He abruptly took a left turn, cutting you off and causing you to bump into him. You immediately apologized, this being the second time today you’d run into a hockey player.

“‘S my fault, I’m still getting used to the new arena,” He said, a sheepish smile appearing on his face. He nodded his head down the hallway, as a silent ‘after you’ and you started walking. As you got further down, you realized Tim walked you out to the bench. The light became brighter, the air a little crisper, and the floor turned from a concrete grey to a bright red. Your eyes wandered up, admiring the view from down here. You’d be truthful earlier, you’d only ever visited your office. But from down here, you could see everything- the thousands of seats, the banners hanging from the ceiling, the crystal white ice. You stood close to the wall, as if to try to intimidate a fly on a wall, seeing everything as if you weren’t there. You could feel Tim could up from behind you, letting you take it all in for the first time.

“That’s Coach,” He leaned closer to you as he pointed across the ice towards someone in a tracksuit. You nodded and although Tim dropped his hand, he stayed close to you. The coach eventually noticed the two of you and started to skate over to the bench. Tim cleared his throat and you looked at him.

“I got to- I have to go now, but, um, I’ll see you around?” You nodded to his question, a soft smile on your lips. He rocked back and forth on his heels, as if he knew he had to leave but he kept getting pulled towards you. “Good luck with the season.”

“Good luck with yours too.” At that he turned away from you, and you turned to the coach, pulling out your file folder to talk with him.

***

A week or two later and the start of the season was upon the Canadian Tire Centre. The home opener was in a few days and your week had been hectic, trying to get notes from practices and implement what you saw into your analysis. After a morning full of spreadsheets, you decided to take your lunch break in your sanctuary. Last year, the arena felt too big to stick around in on your lunch break. So you had headed outside, where you discovered a small hiking trail about a ten minute drive from work. It quickly became a place where you went whenever you needed to clear your head. And after the morning you had, it was the perfect place to go, so you hopped in your car and started towards it.

At the top of the hill, you put the car in park, grabbed your lunch bag and started towards your spot. It was past the picnic tables that had a nice view of the suburbs, but it wasn't secluded. Your spot was off the beaten path, but there was a small ledge with a perfect view of the arena, highway, and surrounding green spaces. You turn the corner, ducking under a tree branch, ready to exhale the heck of the morning you had.

But there was already someone sitting in your spot. Their head was down, but you recognized the logo and number 18 on their hoodie. Cautiously, you approached him.

“18...Is it okay if I sit here?” You asked, and his head shot up. He shot you a small smile and quick nod. You sat down, placing your bag in front of you, taking out a granola bar.

“You can call me Tim, you know. That is my name,” You gave him a shy smile and you could feel your cheeks heat up at his comment.

“I didn’t think anyone knew about this place, Tim,” You mentioned quietly. It felt weird, to be honest, to be sharing your spot with someone, but it didn’t feel like he was intruding.

“My city in Germany has a lot of parks. There’s a forest near my house where I’d go when I needed a break. This is the closest I could find near the rink. I hope you don’t mind?”

“Just don’t go telling the whole team about our place,” you winked at him and took a bite of your snack.

“I can keep a secret, don’t worry.” He laughed lightly and sent you a smile.

“I don’t know if you remember me but-”

“You’re the analyst, you graduated super early right? Y/n, yeah?”

“Yeah, that’s me,” You smiled at him. “So, how are you liking Ottawa?”

“It’s alright, I haven’t seen very much of it. The ice is very good. My house is nice.” He shrugged and you gaped at him.

“That’s all you’ve seen? So you haven’t been to Parliament Hill or ByWard market or…?” you trailed off when you saw him biting his bottom lip and slowly shaking his head. “Well, you are missing out, you should go see the city sometime.”

“Do you think you could show me around? You seem to know all the best places,” He offered. You met his eyes and nodded. He dug his phone out of his pocket, passing it over to you. You raised your eyebrows at the gesture but he just pushed his phone closer to you. Silently, you imputed your number, placing a small graph emoji beside your contact name. You handed it back to him and a small smirk graced his face when he saw the emoji, before he pursed his lips at the device. You furrowed your eyebrows.

“Sorry, it’s all good. Thank you. It’s- I have to go back now, but I’ll text you, yeah?” You nodded as he handed back your phone. He walked towards the parking lot, but turned around to wave at you before he disappeared around the bend.

Later that day as you sat in the stands, a clipboard and pen in your hands, you got a text from an unknown number.

Hi

It's 18 :)

You chuckled at his use of his number and texted him back.

i thought you said i could call you tim? :(

also it’s practice?? how are you on your phone?

It starts in a couple minutes

your teammates are already on the ice

Spying on me already??

it’s literally my job to watch you practice

Guess I'll see you in the stands then :)

Oh and I'm free this weekend for that showing of the city, team bonding’s on friday

i’ll check my schedule and get back to you

now get out on the ice or you’re going to be late :)

***

You had checked your schedule, and agreed to meet that Saturday. You said you’d pick him up since you knew more of the city. You didn't want to be late so you arrived five minutes early in front of Tim's place. He walked out in his signature backwards snapback, some curls poking out the front, and a monochromatic beige outfit. Waving animatedly at you, he jogged to the car, his ever present smile on his face.

The twenty minutes ride into the city was quiet yet comfortable. A few words were exchanged about how each other’s day was so far but nothing groundbreaking. The low hum of the engine filled the silence as you drove into the city.

After parking in a Superstore (‘Free parking in downtown Ottawa is hard to come by, Tim. We’re parking in the grocery store parking lot’) and walking a few blocks, you come to the far end of the market. Lined with local businesses and brick streets, it felt homey. Tim smiled as it reminded him of back home.

“So, what are we going to see first? Your school?” He asked as the two of you walked along the streets. You laughed and shook your head.

“Pfft no. It isn’t all that interesting. I figured we’d see some of my favourite places, if that’s okay?” He assured you it was and the two of you continued through the streets, Tim with his head down as you passed people. He wasn't famous just yet, but in Canada you find hockey fans at every corner. Soon, you arrived in a small plaza with coloured picnic tables and muskoka chairs.

“Ta-da!” You gestured to the large block letters that spelled ‘Ottawa’ in the middle of the space. “It’s not much, but you’ve got to be a tourist in your own city at least once right?” He laughed along with you and you got out your phone, ready to take a picture of him so he could send it to his parents. You thought he would want a picture of him but he was quick to insist you had to be in the picture as well.

“I’m sorry, but would you mind taking a picture of us?” You asked one of the girls who were taking turns with the Ottawa sign.

“Oh sure!” You stood beside him, between the two ‘T’s in Ottawa, his arm slung over your shoulders. You smiled and looked up at Tim to see him smiling as well- and not one of those classic boy coy half smiles, a genuine one. She took a few landscape and a few portrait ones before handing your phone back. “You two are such a cute couple!”

Before you could correct the girl, Tim answered for you. “We’re just friends actually.” She apologized profusely before rejoining her group. You shuffled your feet as an awkward silence overcame you for the first time since you’d met. Your body shivered and you promptly changed the subject.

“Hey, you hungry?” He shrugged and nodded. You nodded and led him away from the sign, through a few back alleys lined with a few merchants, home artists and such. You entered a building, bustling with people. It was long and narrow, with brick flooring and merchants on either side of the middle. There were lots of people, ranging from people doing their weekly grocery shopping to tourists looking for souvenirs. You weaved between strollers and friend groups, Tim grabbing your hand to avoid getting lost. He kept his head low, hoping it would disguise him enough. This day was about you and him, not you, him and the hockey world. Eventually, the two of you exited the indoor market and came to a small opening. Instead of staying in the opening, you turned left, tugging Tim across the street to two small shacks, one red and one blue. The red one had a classic fairytale vibe to it, with beige wainscotting, red painted window frames, and topped with a white and light brown canopy over the window. Underneath the canopy, there was a string of small Canadian flags.

“Do you trust me?” He arched one of his eyebrows but nodded. “I’ll be right back.” Confused, Tim stood there as you walked up the window, spending no time looking at the menu as you ordered. He looked above the shack to see in fancy lettering the word BeaverTails. When you came back, you were holding two paper containers and had a smile on your face. He looked at the sign and then back to the bags in your hands.

“A beaver’s… tail?” You laughed at him and handed him his BeaverTail.

“It’s not actually a beaver’s tail. It’s just a fried pastry that looks like one. They come in lots of flavours but I got you the best one, cinnamon sugar.” You could tell he was hesitant but bit into his and you took a bite of your own.

Almost instantly, he groaned. “Do you take every guy here? Wow. Oh my god,” He got cinnamon smeared over his chin and you laughed as he tried to wipe it off while holding his pastry.

“Hilarious Tim, but I’ll have you know you’re like my only friend here. So… no I don’t take anyone here.” He scoffed and you raised your eyebrows.

“You’re joking. How do you not have other friends? You’re great,”

“I started university as a 16 year math major. It’s not a surprise people didn’t want to talk to me. But it’s okay. I’m used to it by now.”

“Don’t you have people from home come and visit?”

You scoffed. “I don’t really get along with my mum. We moved around a lot when I was younger and I always sorta resented her for not seeing how it affected me. And then, when I got accepted to school out here, she sold the house and started travelling. Last I talked to her, she was in Tahiti.” He raised his eyebrows.

“What about your dad? Or brothers or sisters?” You swallowed your piece of BeaverTail before answering him.

“I have an older sister, Dani. But she’s eight years older than me, so we're not the closest. She checks in every week or so because she knows my mum doesn't. She’s never come out to visit though, she runs her own business back in Seattle.”

“It must be nice to have someone though. Especially when you were growing up. What about your dad?”

“I don’t- I don’t talk about my dad.” You picked at the pastry before changing the topic. “C’mon, you have to see this place.” You gestured to a side street and the two of you made your way towards your favourite destination. You exited beside a taller building and you pressed the button to allow the two of you to cross the street. As you were waiting for the light to turn, you turned to Tim.

“So, I’m guessing you don’t have any siblings then?”

“No, but the guys at the rink were like my brothers so it wasn’t bad.” The light turned red, and the ‘walk’ light turned on. You made your way across, staying close to each other as people walked both ways.

“Hockey tends to do that,”

“Is that why you picked to work in hockey?”

You glared at him as you made it across the street. “That’s personal.”

“We’re friends, aren’t we? Friends share personal stuff.”

“That’s… it’s just different.” You shook your head and lowered the volume of your voice. “Besides, we’re here.” The two of you had stopped in front of some shallow steps that led to a tall archway, with black statues underneath and on top of the arch. It had some engravings on it, both small and large letters. From where they were standing, Tim could make out some numbers, but not well enough to understand the significance. Behind the monument and slightly to the right was the green tipped roof and gothic architecture of the Parliament building.

“What is this place?” He tilted his head as he looked at the arch in the middle of the square. To him, it wasn’t anything special, perhaps another statue of one of the colonizers of the country.

“It’s Canada’s war memorial.” You whispered, and he nodded, clasping his hands in front of his body and lowering his head. “When I was going to school, I’d come here at least once a week.”

His head stayed where it was but he raised his eyes to meet yours. “Why?”

“I know it’s not exactly everyone’s favourite place...because I know so many people died for the country, but for me, it’s a place of silence. Of reflection. It reminds me to be grateful for everything I have. Some days school would be really bad, so this place was perfect to sit and remember that life isn’t bad at all. Not when I was in a safe country, not when I had an education, not when I had a warm house to go back to.”

He nodded. “That seems...perfect. Some days are too loud, there’s too many people saying stuff. I get that.” His voice was quiet as well, as he lifted his head to focus on the stonework and engravings. The two of you stood in silence in front of the memorial for a few minutes more before you tugged on his arm.

“See that building?” You leaned in close to him, your finger extending to point at a building in the distance, a little taller than the ones around it. “That’s the university’s mathematics and physics department. I had most of my classes in that building.” He nodded, leaning in closer to you, your heads almost touching. You lowered your hand and nodded with your head towards the way you came.

“C’mon, we’re not done yet. You’ve got to see the Parliament building.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and headed left towards it. You quickly grabbed his hand and pulled him right. “I’m the tour guide, remember? Trust me, there’s a better view.” You dropped his hand as he started to walk in time with you but you had to shove it in your pocket to replace the heat his hands gave you.

A quick ten minutes walk later and you stood atop a hill overlooking the river. It was a large park with benches and an eccentric art installation in the corner. You walked close to the peak of the hill and stopped, breathing in the fresh air.

“There is Canada’s capital building. It’s nicer to see it from here than from the front where there’s a bunch of tourists. Besides, from here, you get to see more of the architecture.” The building was across the river, its massiveness more pronounced from your viewpoint. There was a dome nearest the river that was covered in flying buttresses, each support beam having intricate details that stood out. The clock tower and green tinted roof completed the gothic look.

“This view is better. Quieter. It reminds me more of home,” You bump your shoulder against his lightly.

“Glad you like it.” The two of you stood in silence until Tim shivered, at which case you decided you should start heading back. If the hockey player was cold, it was cold enough for you too.

The walk and drive back was uneventful, aside from the two of you passing jokes back and forth. When it came to drop him off, he unbuckled his seatbelt but didn’t make an effort to leave the vehicle.

“How much for our snack? I’ll pay you back,”

You waved him off. “It was my treat, don’t worry about it.” He pursed his lips, then shook it. He pulled out his phone from his pocket. A few seconds later, your phone dinged. You glared at him as you opened the text to see an e-transfer. Before you could protest, he cut you off.

“You never said I couldn’t pay for your gas," He laughed, and despite your annoyance at the loophole, you found yourself laughing along with him. He had that effect on you; he seemed to be able to ease any tension you held. “I had a good time today. Maybe we could meet again sometime?”

“I’d like that. I’ll see you at the rink?” He nodded before getting out of your car, waving like he did that morning as you drove off to your place. When you arrived home, you saw a new text from him.

Can you send those pictures you took today?

You tried to suppress a smile, sending them over to which he responded with a ‘Thank youuuu’. You set your phone on your nightstand and turned off the light. Despite your efforts, you fell asleep with a smile on your face from a perfect day with a great person.

***

“Hey, Numbers!” You stopped in your tracks and turned around to see Brady sticking his head out of the dressing room. He had taken a liking to calling you that, especially as you had started hanging around the house more. It was nice, movie nights and sometimes you’d take a pre-game nap with Tim, you had even stayed for lunch at Tim’s request. At this point, it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary for Brady to shout the nickname from anywhere. Practice had ended and you had given your notes to the coach about what to focus on for the Toronto game. “You didn’t happen to see Jimmy, did you?” When you shook your head, his face scrunched into a small frown.

“Where’d he go? Didn’t media like just end?”

He shrugged. “He didn’t even bother to change from media, he just stalked out. He didn’t say anything to any of the guys, so I thought you might’ve seen him.”

“I’ll keep a lookout for him,” You told Brady before he returned to finish dressing and you returned to your office. But even after you’d settled back into your work, there was a feeling in your stomach you couldn’t quite place. Sending a quick text off to Tim, asking where he was, you dove back into work. But it only took five minutes before you were checking your phone, seeing if he’d read the text or responded. When neither happened, you gave him a call. It sent you straight to voicemail and you hung up before you could leave a message. The feeling in your stomach grew and you packed up your bag, knowing no more work would get done tonight. It wasn’t like Tim to sulk or get in his head; he was a generally happy guy. Something must have set him off for him to be acting this way -- even with you. And if it was something this big, there was only one spot he would’ve gone.

“Brady said you stalked out of media. Figured I’d find you here.” He turned around at the sound of your voice, his shoulders dropping a little. He shrugged, which you took as your cue to take a seat beside him at your lookout space. The sun was setting, the golden hour light reflecting on his stress lines, and the sky was littered with wispy clouds.

Your hands were in the pockets of your hoodie, your legs tucked together. Despite being here for close to six years, the Canadian chill always surprised you. You sat with your shoulder pressed to his, a silent symbol of you being there for him. With his head down, he mumbled something too quiet for you to hear, so you leaned your head down to hear him better. At your movement, he huffed and lifted his head.

“I’m supposed… They wanted me to come and make a difference and to help win games. But I’m not helping! I’m supposed to be putting up points and helping win games, but we’re still losing! Like, why do I suck?”

Your chest got tight at his words. “Tim…”

“You can’t deny it, the numbers say we’re losing.”

“Losing doesn’t mean you aren’t producing. This is your first year in the NHL, you wouldn’t be here if they didn’t think you were worth it. Hockey is a team sport, it isn’t just your job to win the game.”

“But they wouldn’t have gotten me right out of the World Juniors if they didn’t need me to start making an impact right away! They were counting on me. And I’m not living up to it….”

“You are nineteen years old. Nineteen. The five other rookies ahead of you in points are all at least two years older than you. Let that sink in. You have so many years ahead of you. And secondly, no one here is expecting you to turn this team around. McDavid’s first year he didn’t turn the team around. And sure, yeah, the next year, the Oilers had more success but guess what? They missed the playoffs the next three years. Hockey is a team sport, one person, not even McDavid, can completely turn a team around. No one is expecting you to turn this team around in one season. This isn’t on you.”

“But the numbers…”

“Are you going to trust the analyst on the numbers or the assholes on Twitter?” He glared at you but let you continue on. “If you really want to talk numbers, we aren’t last in the league anymore. We’ve beat the top team in the division a couple times now. You’re putting up points, you’re helping us win. Cut yourself some slack. You’re nineteen and living in a new country. This team isn’t expecting you to be Ottawa’s saviour, okay?”

“There’s pressure to be better though! Everywhere I go, I just see how I should be doing more, how if I don’t produce more, I’m going to be a draft bust. I’m the young guy, I’m supposed to be the new blood and be able to make a difference. I feel like I’m letting everyone down.” His words lingered in the sunset glow, a contrast to the darkness he was feeling. You fell silent at his outburst, the air feeling too quiet, even with his heavy breathing. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to take it out on you.”

You ignored his apology, knowing he would never intentionally hurt you. “I graduated with a 3.8 GPA. I didn’t have enough job experience but my grades were one of the only reasons I was able to get hired so young. My first year, all I did was double check other people’s stats and predictions, and it was okay. No one expected much out of me because I was young and they didn’t really give me any responsibilities. But this year… they’re looking to me more. Teams with more than two analysts are more likely to produce teams that make the playoffs. I’m number three; I should be helping make a better team. But I’m not. I’m not getting the numbers we need or the stats we need. I know more updated methods and technologies but...it’s just not working. I’m not finding solutions to problems that this team has had for years. And the board and my colleagues see that. I know I shouldn’t worry about them firing me, but I still do. I mean, I’m not producing, why would they keep me around? This wasn’t what they wanted when they gave me the job.”

“They won’t fire you, you’re doing your best. And you’re young, you graduated early. They have to give you a chance to prove yourself in the workplace before they fire you.”

“You wanna take your own advice?” He flushed at your words, but you smiled. “Thanks, though.” He nodded and looked out over the suburbs surrounding the arena.

“The pressure in this league sucks.” He said and you leaned your head on his shoulder.

“Yeah. It does. But we’ll get through it right?”

“We’ll figure something out. Together.” He placed his hand on your thigh and the two of you looked out at the sunset, his touch lingering on your body until the sun disappeared behind the horizon. Silently, he helped you to your feet, and walked you to your car, making sure you got in okay, before he got into his car. On the drive home, your chest felt lighter from the conversation.

***

The final buzzer rang, signalling a 4-2 win for the Senators. You smiled at the scoreboard and gathered your papers. The game was nothing spectacular, but for you, it was a career defining game. Some of the lines you'd suggested were risky, but you had the numbers to back it up, and it worked. It worked. The conversation with Tim earlier last week helped with your confidence to take risks in terms of your analytic advice.

You went back to your office after the game, wanting to type up a report of how you impacted tonight's outcome. If it worked this time, who's to say it couldn't work again? But in a higher stakes game? You felt like you were finally contributing to the team, and damn, it felt good.

Your office was barely even that. It was small, but you had a desk, a window, and your name on the door. It was enough for your first major gig. You'd made it a little homey-er with a small succulent and some motivational quotes. You opened up your laptop and began to type up a document report. The words flowed from your fingers and you used the numbers you counted from the box to back up your findings. Time seemed to stand still as you typed, the document becoming longer and longer.

A knock broke your train of thought and you looked up to see Tim poking his head through your office door. He had a shy smile on your face and you shook the writing haze out of your eyes.

"Hey! Come on in," He nodded, closing the door behind him before leaning against the wall. "You played a good game." His cheeks flushed and he lifted his hat, running his fingers through his hair.

"Thanks, thank you. Anyway, did you eat yet?"

"I mean, I had an iced coffee before the game and a granola bar during the second period. So yeah?" Immediately he started shaking his head and he pushed himself away from the wall. You open your hands as if to say 'what’?" and he outstretched his hand to you.

"Coffee and a granola bar isn't a meal. Let's go get some real food, I'm hungry." He made a grabby hand with his outstretched hand and you sighed.

"I have to finish my report, I can't." He sighed, pushed your laptop shut, and grabbed your hand.

"That can wait. Besides, the boys went out and I need a ride home." He flashed you a shy smile and you rolled your eyes, before picking up your bag and leaving your office with him. You tried not to notice how Tim was still holding onto your hand, but as he tugged you along to a quiet area of the concourse, it was difficult to do. He stopped at a small table with two bar stools. He let go of your hand, cold enveloping you, and you hung your bag on the back of the chair. As you hopped onto the chair, he stayed standing, tapping his fingers on the tabletop.

“What do you want to eat?" When you shook your head again, he pulled out his puppy dog eyes. "Tim, seriously, I'm fine."

"I'm getting some fries and you will eat some of them. Deal?" Your face pulled into a frown and he repeated himself. "Deal?"

"Yes, Mom, deal."

He gave himself a self assured smile. "Great. I'll be right back."

A few minutes later he came back with a container of fries and two small containers. He set them down in front of you before he got seated. A closer look at the container showed one was ketchup and the other was…

"Is this mayo?" He picked up a fry, dipped it in the white substance, and popped it into his mouth. With his mouth full, he nodded. "You eat your fries with mayonnaise?"

"You don't?"

"No!" You shook your head. He took another fry, dipped it again, and ate it.

"You have to try it, it's good!"

“No, no thank you. You can keep your weird German eating habits to yourself." You laughed, dipping a fry in ketchup before eating it.

"Nope, you've got to try one. Please?" You scrunched up your nose, and he held out a white coated french fry. You gave in, taking it from his hands and shoving it in your mouth. You chewed it slowly, contemplating the taste.

"It's...not horrible." He raised his eyebrows at you. "Fine, it's alright." He gave you another look, a small smile forming on his face despite his efforts to hide it. "Okay, okay, I like it. Happy?" He let out a loud laugh.

"Yes! I knew you'd like it!" You laughed a little with him, before dipping another fry in the mayo and popped it in your mouth. The two of you ate in silence, the sounds of the zamboni in the background.

"Why didn't you go out with the guys? You had a good game,"

He shrugged. "I wanted something quieter. Besides, I was hungry and the guys wanted to go out to a bar. Bar food isn't exactly a meal."

"Neither is french fries,"

"Well, maybe, you're just better company than the guys."

"Damn right, I am." You smiled, tapped his fry with yours in a makeshift sort of 'cheers' way. When the two of you had finished your snack, you picked up the container and threw it in the compost bin near the table. You grabbed your bag off the chair, holding up your car keys. He got up off the table, joining you in a slow walk towards the parking lot.

You wished the custodians a good night as the two of you left the arena, the street lights in the parking lot illuminating the way to your car. Silently, you unlocked the car and you both got in. You gave him your phone, telling him to pick any playlist he wanted while you started the car. He picked one of your favourite playlists, a mix of relaxing beats and soft music, which was perfect for late night drives.

"You should have some lo-fi on here, it's a lot like this. I think you'd like it," he said, after you had merged onto the highway.

"Yeah?" He only nodded, allowing a comfortable silence to come back to the car. The rest of the drive was easy, the road being mostly empty and the music filling the car. He gave you quiet directions to the house, more points and here's than actual directions but you were able to find it.

"Thank you for the ride," He said, once you’d put the car in park.

"Thanks for sharing your food with me,” He shook his head and smiled at you, the corners of his eyes crinkling.

“I’ll always share with you.” You caught his gaze, his brown eyes filled with sincerity. You could feel your cheeks flush and you waved him out of your car.

“I gotta get home too, you know.” You joked and he got out, popping his head back into the doorway for a second.

“Text me when you get home, yeah?” You murmured an ‘of course’ and he nodded, closing the car door and making his way to his front door. You waited until he entered the house before you drove away, turning on a lo-fi playlist from Spotify.

***

“Your turn to pick the movie, but no subtitles please, I’m too lazy to read today.” You handed Tim the remote for his TV while you pulled the blanket closer to your chin. The October chill had settled in his apartment and you hadn’t dressed for his room to feel like the arena.

“Jimmy!” Someone called from the kitchen and a loud clang dissolved any annoyance Tim had from his roommate interrupting his time with you. He rushed to the kitchen and you followed behind shyly. There were platters across the kitchen island, each with a different coloured dish. It looked like there was a salad, a couple casserole dishes, and some plates of desserts. A taller brunette was standing in the kitchen, frantically gesturing between Tim and a pot on the stove. There was a lid on the ground, a splatter of pinkish red liquid surrounding it. You entered the kitchen, picked up the lid before placing it in the sink. The other guy was still explaining to Tim what exactly he wanted to do, even though his head was tilted like a confused puppy. You brushing him aside llightly, grabbing the spoon Tim was holding to stir the pinkish red liquid on the stove. You sent him a small smile back over your shoulder and all you could see in his eyes was relief.

“Thank you!” The oven beeped and you noticed an embroidered #9 on the roommate's Senator sweats. You moved to the side to allow him to get another baking dish from the oven. He placed it on the stovetop and took off his oven mitts. “Thank you for doing that. I didn’t think he’d be that helpless in the kitchen.”

“I’m surprised anyone in this house can actually cook,” You laughed. The liquid that smelled of oranges and cranberries started to boil, so you reduced the heat and continued to stir it. You look at the baking dish that he brought out of the oven. “Are those brussel sprouts?”

“Yeah! My mom’s recipe; they’re delicious! Do you like them?”

“They’re one of my favourites! My recipe uses bacon though.”

“Oh nice! You’ll have to share it with me, I’d love to try it. And, sorry, I didn’t introduce myself. I’m Josh,”

“I know.” He shot you a look and you backtracked. “I-Sorry, it’s just-I actually work with you? I’m in the analytics department, so I know your jersey number and I saw it on your sweats and put two and two together. I’m not being a creep, I’m sorry.” The sound of laughter behind you made you blush.

“Not being a creep my ass. They did the same thing when me and Jimmy ran into them for the first time!” Brady commented, walking into the kitchen. He was wearing a nice pair of dress pants and a button up shirt. You shook your head before nodding towards his attire.

“Going somewhere nice?” He looked down at his outfit and shook his head.

“It’s Thanksgiving? It’s why they gave us the day off?” That...that would explain the amount of food in the kitchen. No matter how many years you lived here, you’d always forgotten that Canadian Thanksgiving was a whole month earlier. You placed the stir spoon on a plate next to the pot and wiped your hands on your pants.

“Oh! Um, right, well, uh in that case, I should be, I should get going. You guys must have plans. Nice to meet you Josh.” You made your way out of the kitchen to the foyer where your coat and shoes were without so much as a goodbye to the guys. You could hear Tim coming after you, his steps lighter and more graceful than Brady or Josh’s. But, he didn’t make a move to do anything except stare at you as you got ready to leave. It wasn’t until you were getting ready to put on your shoes that he spoke.

“You should just stay. We’ve got lots of food.”

“Oh, I don’t want to intrude…”

“Brady’s bringing his girlfriend and a couple other of the guys are coming over. You wouldn’t be intruding.”

“I really shouldn’t…”

“You should. Why won’t you stay?”

“I don’t know if you have this holiday in Germany, but Thanksgiving is a family thing, Tim.” You sighed. “Besides, shouldn’t I have brought something? Am I even dressed okay?” You looked down at your outfit - a simple pair of jeans and one of your comfiest graphic tees. He shrugged.

“Don’t worry about that. You look great, just enjoy the night with me. Stay? Please? C’mon schatz, you’re like my family to me.” The two of you maintained eye contact until you broke it and took off your coat. You could see Tim’s smile widen and when it came to walking back into the kitchen, he extended his arm. You took it and the two of you made your way back towards what would end up being a wonderful evening full of laughs and smiles shared between friends.

***

You had come over for a trashy reality TV binge after a particularly hard day at work. None of the numbers were adding up the way you needed them to and your laptop was having a hissy-fit all day. Soon enough, you called it a day and texted Tim, telling him you’d be over in twenty minutes. He greeted you at the door with your favourite chocolate treat, a box of Timbits, and “there’s popcorn in the microwave right now, it’s almost done”. You could’ve melted right on the spot. Instead, you made your way over to the couch where you collapsed and pulled the blanket he had already set out for you up to your chin. You breathed in the smells of pine and sock tape and felt your body relax. HGTV played in the background while you waited for him to bring the popcorn out when his phone dinged.

“Tim, your phone!” You yelled to him from across the living room.

“Who is it?” You sighed and moved from your comfortable spot on the couch to check his messages. You turned on the phone to see a message from Josh, saying he’s five minutes away. You went to lock the phone, seeing the unimportance of the message but something caught your eye. You swiped to clear the notification and his background came into focus. It was the two of you standing in front of the Ottawa sign at ByWard market, his arm around your shoulders and a grin on both your faces.

“Who was it?” He entered the room as he repeated his question.

“Just Josh,” you whispered, turning around to face him holding up his phone. “Am I your lock screen?” He blushes, opening his mouth stammering for words. “I am! I knew I was important to you.” You poked him a couple times for an extra tease when his face settled into a small pout and he retaliated by tickling you. You shrieked and hopped up from the couch, laughing as he chased you around the house.

“Stop doing that!” He laughed as you escaped his clutches once more. Your laugh echoed through the house as he tried again to try to tickle you, but you grabbed Josh and used him as a human shield.

“No fair schatz,” He relented his tickling and sat on the couch. You took a seat beside him, but kept your distance in case he decided to start his torture again.

“You know, you’ve never told me what that means,” You look over to him and he’s already scratching the back of his neck.

“What what means?”

“That thing you keep calling me. Like shats?”

Josh laughed and spoke up. “It means swe-”

“Friend! It means friend!” Tim interrupted loudly, his cheeks rosy. “It means friend.” You raised your eyebrows at his outburst and his explanation.

“You call your friends, ‘friend’?”

He scratched at his jaw and slowly nodded. “In my city, it’s common for friends to just call each other ‘friend’. It’s normal,” You managed out a ‘okay’ between breathy laughs, wondering why he was being so strange about it. It was just a nickname. But the blush in his cheeks didn’t diminish until well after Josh left the room, muttering under his breath about ‘idiots’, and you couldn’t help but think that maybe it meant more than Tim was letting on.

***

“Are you going to be at the gala on Saturday?” Tim asked you as the two of you ate (lunch for you, pre-practice snack for him) on the concourse. It was your first concourse snack since the All-Star break and you had missed him. WhatsApp messages and Instagram messages just weren’t the same as being in his presence. You finished your bite, and shook your head.

“It’s only for players isn’t it?”

“Would you want to come with me?”

“Like...as a date?” You looked up at him, your eyes wide. Maybe this was the clue you were waiting for.

“As friends?” Your eyes darted down onto the counter and Tim took that as a sign you didn’t want to go with him. “There’ll be puppies there.”

“Well,” you swallowed the lump in your throat, “If there’s going to be puppies, I need no more convincing.” You forced a smile onto your face and he returned the sentiment, before finishing up the food. You wished him good luck before the game, and left to go the the box.

Soon enough, it was Saturday night and you found yourself in front of the Fairmont Château. You gazed up at the stone walls and admired how the orange glow from the lights gave it such a warm feeling, compared to the shivers that were going up and down your back. You had found time to go and get a fancy outfit for the night, its gold fabric being a perfect fit on your body. Tim had told you he’d meet you inside, so walked upt the steps alone, avoiding the other guests in fancy attire. They looked like they belonged here. You couldn't relate. The front entrance of the hotel was exactly as you expected -- it had marble floors, crown moldings, and a domed ceiling. You followed the chatter to one of the conference rooms, someone offering to check your coat. With just your clutch, you entered the ballroom with the sound of your shoes following you.

You looked around to try to find Tim among the executives, easily spotting him when you heard Brady’s booming laugh in the corner. You made your way over to the group, including Brady, Josh, Drake, Tim and some respective dates. Josh waved at you and Tim turned around to see you walking towards him.

Tim stood there, memorized by the way the Senators gold fabric hugged your figure and the way your eyes had lit up when you saw one of the puppies. You came over to him, brushing his arm before joining the group. Hellos were thrown your way and it wasn’t long before everyone went back to their conversations and you were able to speak with Tim.

“You look handsome." You handed him your clutch, which he held unashamedly, as you adjusted his gold bowtie, letting your hands linger on the front of his chest. You gulped before snapping out of your trance and took your clutch back from him.

“Um, uh, thanks. You look...good too,” His voice was breathy and his cheeks had flushed a little. You smiled at him, before noticing another golden retriever stumbling around next to its trainer and darting off to pet it. Tim watched you go and he stood back, blown away by the way his heart was beating faster and how he couldn’t seem to get enough air into his lungs.

“You finally figured it out, huh?” He turned around at Drake’s voice. He had recognized the look on Tim’s face, it was the same one he had when he looked at his partner. Tim furrowed his eyebrows.

“Figured what out?”

Drake scoffed and took a gulp of his drink. “God, you already know and you’re denying it. You’re in love with them.” Tim shook his head, waving off the thought. You were his best friend, nothing more. “C’mon man, you can keep lying to yourself but it’s obvious to everyone else.” He was then swept away by a reporter, leaving Tim to his thoughts.

He wasn’t in love with you. He was sure of it. You were his best friend, his safe spot. It’s not like when he sees you his heart beats faster or he notices how your eyes crinkle when you laugh or when the sun hits your skin just right, you look like an angel. It’s not like the more he looks at your lips the more he wants to know if they taste like your sweet honey lip chap. It’s not like your smile could cure his darkest days or that he could see himself introducing you to his family as his partner.

Except it was like that.

Tim saw all of that with you. He saw more galas, more late night drives, lazy Sunday mornings. He wanted to see you after his games, not in your office, but in the tunnel where you’d be wearing his jersey and a special jean jacket. He wanted to take you home to meet his family, his hometown friends. He wanted to show you all the places that were special to him, just as you showed his places special to you. He wanted to meet Dani and see if she thought he was good enough to be your partner. As he stared at you petting the small golden pup, he realized Drake was right. He was in love with you.

He was in love with his best friend.

Fuck, what was he supposed to do now?

You didn’t give him too much time to think about that as you came up behind him, telling him everything about the golden retriever you just met. He smiled at you, and motioned with his head to find your seats as dinner was going to be served soon. You sat next to him, your leg brushing against his under the table. Even from that, he got shocks-- tiny lightning bolts trailing up his body. It was like every sense was heightened after he came to the realization that he loved you. How am I supposed to even act around them? He thought.

The meal passed without issue and while Tim went about schmoozing all the executives and donors, you stick with the other halves. You had already met Emma, Brady’s partner, and she introduced you to Dakota, Briar, and Marissa (she had also told you who they came with but that information had not stuck with you).

“Sooo… Emma, how’s the wedding planning going?” Briar asked. She had gotten engaged over the holiday break. She laughed and waved off the question.

“Oh, not at all! We’re just enjoying being engaged, it’s like the honeymoon phase all over again,”

“Just like you and Tim,” Dakota nudged you and wiggled her eyebrows. You coughed on your drink at her statement.

“What?” You managed to sputter. Emma looked uncomfortable but didn’t say anything. “What do you mean, like me and Tim?”

“Oh come on, it’s so obvious the two of you are in your honeymoon phase! Don’t be ashamed of it, you’re such a cute couple!”

“Ooh yes!! How his bowtie matched your outfit is like goals, I wish my boyfriend did that with me,” Marissa mentioned. Your voice felt caught in your throat and you were instantly aware of the breeze in the room and the sweat on the back of your neck.

“We’re just friends,” Your voice was small.

“I’ll believe that when pigs fly, babe. Oh, look, here comes your man.” Dakota winked at you before turning into her own date. You turn around quickly to see him walking over to you, laughing with Brady and Josh. Normally, the sight of him would calm you down. He was such a genuine person and you appreciated how you never had to shrink yourself to fit in with him. But with the girls’ comments, you suddenly couldn’t be around him. When his hand met the small of your back, you flinched before relaxing into his touch. It was just Tim, your Tim. It’s not a big deal unless you make it a big deal.

“Timmy, I was just telling Y/n what a cute couple you two are!”

“Well, what do they say? Oh right, they complete me,” He sent you a wink and pulled you closer to his side. You went stiff in his hold, and he noticed, instantly letting you out of his grip. You muttered out an excuse about work and said quick goodbyes to the group before you were out of the gala as fast as your shoes could allow. Your cheeks were hot with...embarrassment? No, that wasn’t quite it. But they were hot, and the room felt small with Dakota’s teasing so just needed to escape. You needed to have fresh air in your lungs, needed to feel the cool Ottawa air on your arms. Needed to be somewhere other than beside him and his light teasing that left your stomach in knots.

But you hadn't even reached the front door and grabbed your coat from the coat check when Tim caught up to you. He watched you try to put on your coat, as he rocked back and forth on his heels like that first day you met.

“Do you… do you actually have work in the morning or were you just saying that?” You looked up and met his eyes, the orbs holding a certain vulnerability you hadn’t seen before.

“I got called at the last minute. I forgot to tell you, Jody’s kid got sick so I’m covering the game on Sunday but I haven’t prepared my notes or anything and you know me, I’ve got to be prepared or I won’t make a coherent analysis and then I’m really in trouble-” Tim cut your rambling off with a murmur of your name and you slowed your frantic movements to look at him.

“We’re okay, right?”

You smiled at him before you walked out the glass door. “Yeah, we’re alright.”

***

Last night was confusing to say the least. You could still feel the heat in your cheeks from...embarrassment? No, it wasn’t that. It was more like you couldn’t stand around to see what he meant by his comment. You couldn’t stand around why everyone else say you as a couple when you knew you weren’t. But you were okay with not being a couple weren’t you?

It’s like not you liked him that way. Yeah, a simple smile from him could turn your day around and your concourse snacks were the highlight of your week. But that’s because he was your best friend. It’s not like you wanted to spend every morning waking up to him or spend your afternoons running your fingers through his hair. It’s not like you wanted to take him back to Seattle to meet Dani or how you wanted to wear his jersey to call him yours. It’s not like you daydreamed about him gently holding your hand as you walked through ByWard market or how soft his lips would be as he leaned in to kiss you or what his abs felt like without a shirt separating your fingers from his skin.

Except it was like that.

And then came the comment at the gala. Did that mean he liked you too? But he said you were just going as friends. Did he mean it platonically? What if you read things wrong? Fuck, why were feelings so complicated?

Dani, you needed to call Dani. She’d know what to make of all this. She picked up on the fourth ring. “Thanks for calling Books By The Ocean, may you please hold?”

“Dani, it’s me.” Hold music filled your ear and you rolled your eyes. A few minutes later, there was almost certainly a hole in your rug from your pacing and she finally picked up.

“Why’d you resort to calling the store? I would’ve answered my phone eventually,”

“Yeah, eventually. I just really need to talk to you now,”

“Okay, so what’s up?”

“There’s this guy…”

“Is it Tim? Please tell me it’s Tim.” When you didn’t answer, she rejoined before reeling it in and telling you to continue.

“Anyways...we’re pretty good friends, I've known him since like the start of the season, and I don’t know, like I think he likes me? And I mean, I like him, he’s really great but, like, I just-”

“Can you get to the point please?”

“I want to take the next step with him. I want to be more than friends with him. I want all those things but… I just seem frozen. Like when I think about telling him, my body feels like it won’t move. It feels like I’m underwater. But I want to do more with him. I want that. Why won’t my brain get that and let me… I don’t know, let me act on my feelings?”

“You’re protecting yourself. You’ve never got hurt before,” You scoffed at her statement.

“What do you mean, of course I have,”

“Okay, sure, when you scraped your knee or when Nancy Peters called you dumb in second grade but you haven’t got hurt before. You haven’t opened yourself up to someone and let someone into your heart and let them see you for who you are.”

“Well, yeah, okay, but that’s because they might not like what they see,”

She sighed. “You can’t go through life with your walls up, kiddo. It’s hard, but you have to trust yourself. You have to let yourself feel. You have to let people in. When we were little and moved around a lot, maybe it was a survival tactic. But you’ve been in Ottawa for close to five years now and have unpacked all your boxes? Have you had any friends over? You’ve put down roots there but you’re still holding onto a survival tactic when you need to be living, not just surviving.

“I let people in--”

“No. You don’t. Has Tim ever been in your apartment? Has he seen that even though you resent Mom, you still have family photos of the four of us in your living room? Does he know about Dad? You might have told him stuff but you’re still living behind walls.” She sighed.

“Look, I don’t mean to be hard on you, but I want to see you thrive kiddo. I want you to experience life, and yeah, hurt is a part of life. You aren’t doing life right if you come out unscathed. And sure, maybe he’s a great friend. But in some instances, that romantic partner can fill a more emotionally secure place. People usually place more trust in their partner than just a friend. You’ve got to open up to him more than you already have if you want more from him.”

“How do I do that?”

“You’ve got to figure that out on your own kiddo, but it probably wouldn’t hurt to talk to him. Honestly; no hiding behind your friendship.” You nodded to her advice, before realizing she couldn’t see you, and thanked her for her help. She hung up with the promise to chat again on Wednesday like you normally did. You threw your phone beside the sink and leaned your head against the cool counter.

Be honest with him

Okay, you could do that. Easy enough right? You just had to make a plan to tell him. You could do that.

***

You were walking through the halls close to the bench to deliver your latest stats to the coach. It was your job after the other analysts determined you “had the youngest feet” and could go scouring around to find the coach. You didn’t mind. Besides… if you just happened to bump into Tim while you were down here, well then that was a completely unplanned coincidence. Since the gala and your chat with Dani afterwards, you were feeling good about where you stood with Tim. And you’d made your plan. After the game, you’d meet up for after-game snacks like most home games and you had told yourself you’d talk to him then.

You had given the latest report to the coach on the bench, walking past the locker room towards the box when you heard Tim's voice.

“...I don’t know man, I just need a break from Y/n.” You stopped in your tracks. It wasn’t that you meant to be nosy, but at the mention of your name… you wanted to see what else he had to say. You hadn’t meant to smother him but you guess he saw it differently. Your shoulders dropped and you bit your lip.

“I only have a problem around them!” You could feel the breakfast in your stomach start to turn, the feeling of bile starting to rise up. A ringing started to fill your ears, the white static noise only being pieced by his once comforting voice.

“It’s just… We work together, you know? It’s awkward,” Where was this attitude when you were hanging out at the start of the season? Last week? If this is how he felt, why didn’t… what did he mean by his comment to Dakota?

His voice shook you out of your trance. “Like at the end of the day, I’m me… they pay me a lot to play my game and they’re...them.” At that, you rushed away from earshot. If that was how he really felt, then screw him. If he was the hockey star and you were just the analyst, then that’s what role you’d play. Nothing more, nothing less. And he wasn’t brave enough to say that to your face, you’d say it first.

This is why you didn’t open yourself up. If you were going to get hurt either way, it might as well be the least damaging option.

Over the next few games and practices, you kept your distance from the players. You avoided the bench, sending Jody to give reports to the coach. You kept your office door closed, the blinds closed, and you made sure to time your exits of the arena to avoid Tim. If avoiding him meant you avoided the inevitable conversation where he would tell you your flaws and point out every way you misread things, then you would do that.

After you heard that, you stopped going out of your way to pass by the boys in the arena. You went into your office, closed the door, and didn’t leave until you went home. When you had to sit in the stands for practices, you sat higher than you used to and ignored the waves and stared you got from the team. He sent the occasional text but you replied with an im busy too many times that he stopped trying. It was odd to you how he kept reaching out when he was the one who said he needed a break but you ignored that voice in your head.

It was a Friday when he finally confronted you. You had been so close to leaving the arena, just one more hallway, and you would’ve been out the door and into the parking lot. He had called your name and you tried to turn the corner without him but he caught up easily, grabbing your wrist to get you to stay.

“What’s up? It feels like I haven’t seen you in forever,” He let go of your wrist as you turned to face him.

“Well that’s what happens when you’re a bigshot NHL player and I’m a lowly analyst.” He squinted his eyes and furrowed his eyebrows at your statement.

“What?”

“Look, I don’t-- I don’t think we should be friends anymore,”

He slowly nodded, thinking your words over in his head. “Okay. Um...I think… yeah, that could be good. I don’t think we should be just friends either.” He shot you a shy smile with a spark of hope in his eyes but you frowned.

“Good. It’s settled then.” You turned on your heel and walked away from him, only wiping your teary eye once you had rounded the corner, refusing to let him see you cry. You missed the way he frowned as you retreated.

The weekend was spent in bed, repeat episodes of Loki playing in the background. Loki never hurt you the way Tim had, the way his words dug into your insecurities of being alone creating a wound like no other. You had turned your phone off earlier as it kept buzzing with messages from him. You didn’t want to hear his excuses of why and you didn’t want to explain that you’d overheard his conversation. But the season wasn’t over yet so you gave yourself two days to grieve. When Monday morning came, it was like nothing had ever happened.

Tim caught you in the main entrance way at the rink. It was close to 8am and you knew he didn’t have practice until 11, so it was obvious he was waiting for you. You walk right past him until he softly calls your name and you stop walking, but don’t turn around. “Why are you ignoring me?”

“You know why.” You whipped around and scoffed at him. “And you know what else? If you had a problem with me, you could’ve just said something. You didn’t have to keep hanging out with me.”

“What?”

“I think we should just keep this professional, 18. I’m nothing more than a background analyst to your hockey superstar, so let’s just stick to our jobs, yeah?”

“What are you talking about?”

“We work together, we shouldn’t be friends, you said it yourself. It’ll be better this way. Now, please, just leave me alone.” You brushed by him, bumping your shoulder with his, and you missed the way his jaw fell open at how quickly your relationship seemed to change.

He seemed to leave you alone after that. He didn’t check in and he didn’t send funny memes he found. He didn’t text you to tell you he landed safely on road trips and you didn’t congratulate him on a game well played. You could tell Brady and Josh thought it was weird but didn’t say anything, just gave you pitying looks when you passed by or caught their eye in the halls.

The Senators failed to clinch a playoff spot, thanks to an overtime loss to Winnipeg. The end of the season for you was nice. It meant a shift in your work to more prospects, and thankfully, a more flexible work schedule. You didn’t have to go into the arena and most of the players went back to their hometowns to visit. It was supposed to be a reprieve for you, knowing Tim wasn’t even in the country. It was supposed to be relaxing, going to all the places that had helped you in the past to regroup your thoughts.

But instead, it felt suffocating, strolling through the market. You’d been here thousands of times to clear your head, but this time the deeper you walked, the more the thoughts in your head swirled into a hurricane.

You’d never know what home felt like. You’d had friends tell you it’s having like extended family over around the holidays or it’s the peacefulness they felt at their lake house. You thought you had found it in Ottawa, its quaintness and history bringing you a sense of calm you hadn’t had before. But only with Tim did you feel that inner peace that home felt like. Only with Tim did you feel like you could take on the world. Only with Tim did you feel whole.

And that was scary.

Feeling like one person could complete you, like they had a piece of your heart you didn’t know you gave them, was scary. You were used to being on your own. You’d done it throughout your levels of schooling and throughout the beginnings of your career. And all it took for that strength to come crashing down was a bashfully confident German hockey player.

He couldn’t even tell you why. It would’ve hurt more to hear the exact reasons why you weren’t good enough for him, but it would have quelled your mind from picking on every single insecurity your mind could come up with.

Before you knew it, you were staring at the Ottawa sign. You glanced around to see couples waiting for their turn at the sign. Some of the guys had their arms around the shoulders’ of their girlfriends. Some of the girls had their hands clasped in their girlfriends’. Some people had their arms around the waist of their partner. But they all had a smile on their face, a fondness that was reserved for the love of their life.

Your eye caught the sight of a backwards Senators cap and your head whipped around. The person was tall and was wearing a grey hoodie. The man turned to the side and you caught a glance of the brown tufts of hair that stuck out of the cap. He threw his head back and the corners of your mouth turned up. Tim’s laugh was always infectious, even if you were upset with him.

But it wasn’t him.

He hadn’t reached out since the day in the hallway. As much as you knew you didn’t want to hear him say things more hurtful than what you overheard, you couldn’t help but wonder where you went wrong. The what-ifs tumbled around in your head, the possibilities of why suddenly your friendship was too much for him.

As you stood there in the market, the memories racing through your mind mixed with images of happy couples all around you, you knew you had to get out. You don’t really remember the rush of leaving, all you know is that the city that felt big for so many years now felt too small. You can’t go anywhere without being reminded of him, his smile, his laugh. How his eyes glimmer from the light of a movie. You drove yourself to the airport, knowing there wasn’t going to be a cab this early in the morning.

Before you knew it, you were standing outside of the familiar blue painted bookstore with your duffle bag in your hands. It was raining and overcast in Seattle, which wasn’t unusual, but even the fat teardrops felt melancholic. The sign in the window said closed, but you knew Dani would be in the back, organizing new stock. You knocked on the window, the sound rattling through the worn building. A few seconds later, her head of light pink hair came to the door, opening it. Before she could question your presence, you spoke.

“He didn’t want me,” you cried. “He didn’t even see all of me and he didn’t want me.” You dropped your bag as she pulled you into a hug. One hand cradled the back of your head as she pulled you out of the rain and into the store. You inhaled her scent, a mix of sea salt and the old bookstore, and squeezed her tightly. When she released you from the hug, she tucked a piece of hair behind your ear, her fingers grazing down your jaw. She gave you a soft smile, before walking to the back of the store, where her apartment was. Your shoes squeaked against the old hardwood floors as you followed her towards the kitchen, where you could smell a pot of tea brewing.

She was silent as she poured you a cup, kissed your head, before whispering everything was going to work out. She slipped out of the room, giving you your space.

You didn’t even have to ask. Dani let you stay with her for the summer, as long as you helped out around the store when you weren’t doing your own work. She didn’t push you for details about Tim, she just let you be. You tried your best to be cheery around the customers but that facade only lasted so long. When you were alone, you didn’t try to hide the emptiness you felt there.

***

Too soon did the days start to get shorter, the nights colder, the pitter-patter of raindrops became more constant which meant fall was coming. The season was starting up again, and you had to head back to Ottawa. This summer at home was a nice break but you knew that running away wasn’t going to solve all your problems. You were packing when a text from Josh came in.

So when are you getting in?

i land at 9pm on the 20th. Why?

Can’t I wonder when my friend gets into the city?

we’re friends?

Of course we are Numbers! I don’t share family recipes with just anyone :)

good to know thanks :)

You continued packing, thinking about what he said. You knew the two of you were friends, but he was Tim’s teammate. His roommate. To hear him say, regardless of where you and Tim stand, that you two were still good was a relief. As much as you’ve enjoyed your time away from the city, you missed work. You missed sitting in the arena, a brisk chill over your shoulder, the sounds of scraping ice and whistles. You missed the quaintness of Ottawa and, as much as he’d never let you forget it, you missed Josh’s cooking. Nights with Dani didn’t compare to nights with Brady (and sometimes Emma) and Josh.

Dani parked in the loading zone of the airport. She got out of the car to help with your bag, even though you had only brought one.

“Hey, listen, um. I know you don’t want to talk about what happened with Tim but… I think you need to talk to him.”

“Dani...”

“No, listen. I think you need some closure. You ran away from a city you haven’t left in five years, a city you so obviously love, because it hurt to think about him. Maybe closure means you talk to him. Maybe it doesn’t. But you’ve spent this whole summer looking lost, like you’re waiting for something to magically appear and make everything better. You look like you’ve lost a piece of yourself and you don’t know how to get it back. And that’s not you, kiddo. It’s never been you; you’ve always been so straightforward and sure of yourself. I want you to feel like yourself again, that’s all.”

“What if…” You swallowed the lump in your throat. “What if the piece of me that I lost isn’t something I can get back?”

“Then you fill it. It might not be perfect and maybe you need lots of tape, and maybe you accept that there will be small cracks in it, but those holes make your souls yours. It’s a part of life, and you can’t avoid it no matter how hard you try.” You pulled her in for a hug, some of the tears in your eyes dropping onto her shoulder.

“Thank you Dani. For everything.” She pulled back to wipe the tears from your face, a smile on her face.

“You know I’m always here for you, kiddo. Take care of yourself, okay?” You nodded, knowing if you spoke again, more tears would bubble over. You walked towards the departures gate, walking towards the reality you ran from.

Several hours later, you were happy to be back in Ottawa. You had missed it, as much as it pained you when you were here. Tim Hortons, bilingual signs, friendly smiles, and oh god you could have real poutine again. Yeah, it was nice to be back.

Dani’s words mulled over in your head throughout the flight, and continued to as you made your way through the airport. She was right, maybe you needed closure. Accept what happened and move on. You’d lost friends when you graduated early, you’d lost friends when you moved away. You’d lost friends before and this was no different.

Except you knew deep down it was different. It was Tim; it was always going to be different with him.

You shook your head, as if to physically rid yourself of the thought. If Tim didn’t want to be around you, then you weren’t going to waste your time waiting for him to show up. You’d suck it up everything you had to look at a stat, but other than that you’d focus on work, focus on proving yourself in the company. You started to walk towards where you’d parked your car (without wondering how much the parking was), ignoring the happy reunions of students and families. You had been perfectly fine being in Ottawa on your own until you realized how much better it could be when you had someone.

A hand grasped your wrist and instantly, you turned around and ripped your arm from the stranger. You looked up, first to see a bouquet of flowers made up of peach roses, white tulips, and hydrangeas. Behind the colours of the flowers, you see a familiar face, eyes full of sorrow and hope. Even when you were ignoring him, he was still so easy to read.

“Number 18.” You struggled to keep your voice even, but you lifted your head to appear as if he had no effect on him.

“Hi Y/n,” He met your eyes, which you quickly darted away. “These are for you.” He tried to hand the bouquet to you, but you shook your head.

“How did you know when I got in?” The coldness in your voice surprised Tim, but he didn’t show it, swallowing slowly before answering you.

“Josh told me." You folded your arms, your hands gripping your bag in case you needed to get away from this conversation.

“Josh mentioned it or you asked Josh?” When he didn’t answer, you knew it was the latter and scoffed at his sneaky actions. You quickly turned away from him and moved faster towards the exit. You heard him sigh from behind you and before you could make a sly comment about it beneath your breath, he was ahead of you, blocking your way. You tried to side-step him, but hockey reflexes prevailed. You glared his way and tried again, silently begging him to move.

“C’mon, you have to talk to me sometime, we work together,” He commented.

“That’s exactly it. We work together. You’re the high and mighty NHL superstar and I’m the nerdy analyst. We have our places. They don’t mix, so really I don’t have to work with you at all. So, please, if you could just move, I have nothing else to say to you.” You tried once more to step around him, but he lightly grabbed your forearm to stop you.

“But I have stuff to say to you.”

“You had months to say it, so I’ll say it again, please let me by.” Suddenly, he was on his knees in the airport, the flowers still outstretched in his hands.

“Y/n,”

“What are you doing?” You hiss to him, your face darting around to see people starting to stare at Tim’s grand gesture.

“I need you to talk to me, and you won’t, so I’ll beg until you agree to hear me out,” You could feel more people staring, the shutter of camera phones, the eyes of everyone in the Ottawa airport (or what felt like it) easily making up your mind. There was a reason you were an analyst, away from the spotlight, doing your work behind the scenes.

“Get up,” you started to pull on his arm, but he just stayed anchored to the ground.

“You’ll talk to me?”

“18, I will do anything as long as you stop making a scene,” At this point, your cheeks felt as if you’d stood under the beating sun for an hour. He got up from his knees, the flowers still outstretched in his hands, and you let go of his arm. You grabbed the flowers from his arms, dropping them in a garbage bin as you stalked out of the airport. Tim caught up to you and walked by your side.

You said nothing as you reached your car, unlocking the doors. You didn’t even wait for him to have his seatbelt on before you were backing out of the stall and driving away. Thoughts were running wild in your head; you were angry and embarrassed at the stunt he pulled at the airport, appalled at the audacity he had to show up after what he said, and last of all you were reluctantly happy to be back in his presence again. So you went to the one place you knew you could think.

You put the car in park overlooking the suburbs. You turned it off and rested your arms on the steering wheel. You couldn’t make the effort to get out and walk to the lookout spot, the car creating a safe bubble for your thoughts.

“Why won’t you talk to me?” His soft voice broke the tense silence in the car and you scoffed.

“We’re not friends anymore. You’re the Senators star player and I’m just the nerdy analyst. There’s no reason for me to need to talk to you.”

“See, you keep saying that but I-I don’t get it! What does that even mean?” You furrow your eyebrows as you turn to face him, his own face scrunched up and his eyes hard.

“What do you mean you don’t get it? You said that! The last game against Montréal? I was walking past the locker room and… I overheard you talking with the guys.” You looked down to your lap, findling with your hands. You briefly saw Tim’s hand start to move towards you, but you shook your head and it stayed in his lap. “You said you needed a break from me. You said that ‘at the end of the day they pay me a lot to play my game and they’re.. them’. You said you had a problem with me. What was I supposed to take from that except that you didn’t want me to be in your life?”

He stammered for words but you cut him off. “No, I don’t think you understand how much it hurt. Hurt to have the one person who I thought understood me to talk behind my back about how I wasn’t enough for them. It hurt to know that the one person who I always wanted to talk to, didn’t want to talk to me. Hurt to think that you’ve only ever seen me as just some nerdy analyst who has no place in your life. I had been fine before, without you in my life, but then you came in and knocked down every barrier I ever had. And then left as if you didn’t just break my life into pieces!

“I left Ottawa because it hurt too much to go to all my favourite places, because I went there with you. I let you into my safe spaces, and when you left, you shattered that security. You tainted all the good I had there. I thought that Ottawa was home before I met you,” you scoffed. “Not even close. You feel like home to me. And for you to say that I was a problem in your life?” You shook your head at him and looked down at your hands. “I tried to get over it, believe me I did. But every single place I went I was reminded of you… and how everything we had didn’t feel like a big deal to you.”

“I never meant for that to happen.” His voice was quiet and strained, as if he was trying to keep his emotions within him.

“You know the hardest part? I didn’t just have to get over losing my best friend. I had to get over someone I fell in love with! I lost the single most important relationship with one tiny little passing conversation. And you acted like nothing happened! Like we were still friends, like you still cared for me-”

“Ich liebe dich du trottel!” His outburst caught you off guard and you gulped. His heavy breathing was the only sound in the car as you whispered.

“You know I don’t speak German…”

“You don’t need to know German to know what I said,” His eyes were hard, a look you had only seen during games.

“Oh.” You shook your head and looked at him. “Wait what?”

“I didn’t say those things you think I did! You didn’t listen to the whole thing! Brady was teasing me about me saying I don’t have a problem talking to people I like and I don’t normally but you’re the exception! I needed a break from you because everytime I see you, my heart starts beating faster and my hands get sweaty and I don’t know how to act! And the guys said that sounds like I’m in love with you-- and I am! I am! But when I finally started to do something about it, you ran away from me! I didn’t know what to do. Besides, if I fell in love with you...it could mess with our jobs. Because if for any reason, something happens, they’d fire you before they’d ever trade me. And you’ve worked too hard to have an opportunity like this be taken away from you because of me. So... I didn’t know what to do. And then you just kept ignoring me and saying those things about how you’re just a nerdy analyst…. It felt like we weren’t on the same page anymore and I didn’t know where it came from or what to do either so I tried to give you space. But then you shut me out. And you said we shouldn’t be friends. So I thought that meant.... you wanted to be more than friends? And the boys were saying that you being mean to me was just you having a hard time having feelings for me but then you… uh, yelled at me so I left you alone. But that doesn’t mean I stopped thinking about you.” He placed one of his hands on top of your tentatively, giving you the option to shoo his hand away. When you didn’t, he rubbed the skin on top of your hand. “It never meant I stopped caring about you.”

He sighed. “I guess I see now that I should not have given you space. I should’ve been better for you because that’s what you deserve.”

“I could’ve been better too, this isn’t all your fault. I said some mean things.”

“I promise you, that when we’re together I’m not a NHL player. I’m just me… just Tim from Germany who likes hockey. You have always seen me for who I am, and that’s...that’s something I love about you.”

Your breath got caught in your throat. Love… was a big word. Love was for confident people. Love was for those who didn’t understand the weight of that four letter word. Love wasn’t a word you threw around. Love was scary. It asked you to place your bandaged heart in someone else’s hands and hope they didn’t drop it, shattering the pieces into smithereens. Love meant letting down those walls that time and time again had proved that needed to stay up. To protect you. To avoid the heartache of broken trust.

And here he was, throwing that word around as if the implications didn’t matter. As if he didn’t leave. As if he didn’t call you a problem. As if he didn’t know the months you spent trying to forget him and the fragments he left behind.

As if he still wasn’t understanding.

“I… I can’t do this.” You go to open the car door only for it to lock. You gasp, and you whip your head around, your eyes sharp. “This is my car, you can’t do that!” His eyes went wide and you tried again, only for it to be locked again. You gritted your teeth and he spoke before you could reprimand him again.

“Don’t shut me out again! You say you can’t do this, okay, but tell me why. We’re supposed to-to talk to each other! We would’ve had no mess if you had just talked to me after you heard what I said! So.. talk to me,” You met his soft eyes, your resolve breaking with just one look. “Please, schatz.”

You slowly pulled your hand off the handle, letting it fall into your lap. You picked at your fingernails while trying to compose your thoughts, Tim’s concerned eyes never leaving you. He murmured your name and you took a deep breath, steadying yourself.

“I’m sorry I just- I don’t know if I can jump back into where we were. I know that… it’s different than I thought but I can’t-” you cut yourself off before you said something you regret and a cold chill ran through you. “It still hurts. I can’t just unhear those things you said. Especially when they came from you. So, I’m going to need time to process everything.”

He placed one of his hands over your fidgeting fingers and you lifted your head to meet his soft eyes. “I’ll give you some space. Just let me know when you know, yeah?” Before you could nod your head, he had opened his door and got out of your vehicle. You quickly got out to question him.

“What are you doing?” He turns around at the sound of your voice.

“I’m… I’m giving you space?”

“How are you planning to get home? Uber?” He shrugged before nodding, with his hands stuffed in his pockets. “Uh, no. No. Get in.” He raised his eyebrows and you sighed. “It’s almost 11pm, we’re in a dark forestry area, and you are the least threatening person I know. I’m not going to let you get stabbed by some murder psycho; you still mean something to me, you know.”

At that he came over to the car, and the two of you got settled back into your seats. After you buckled up and started the engine, Tim broke his silence.

“Did you mean that? That I still mean something to you?”

You swallowed slowly and took a while to answer his question, your hand resting on the gear shift. You put the car in reverse, and looked over at him. “You’re always going to mean something to me. Just what exactly you are changes.” You backed out of the parking lot and started the drive to his place. He was quiet for a few minutes, pondering your answer, but when he spoke his voice had the quiet confidence he always carried around with him.

“Can I ask what I am right now?” Streetlights illuminated his face and out of the corner of your eye you see him slightly turned towards you, his face unsure.

“No. I’ll keep you updated?”

“Good enough.”

The rest of the drive back to his house was quiet, aside from the lo-fi beats you had playing in the background. Despite the tension, the drive felt comfortable. When you parked in front of his house, he cleared his throat.

“Um, thank you for the ride. I’ll see you around I guess,” He unbuckled his seat belt and placed his hand on the handle.

“Goodnight Tim.” Despite your smile, Tim really hoped your goodnight didn’t also mean goodbye. He got out of your car, walked up the steps to his door, unlocked it and gave you a small wave before he went inside.

Tim was true to his word. He gave you space. He didn’t go back to the lookout spot or the war memorial, knowing those were your sanctuaries before they were his. He didn’t ask for updates, he didn’t stop by your office, he didn’t ask Josh how you were doing.

And you appreciated it. The time and space left you alone with your thoughts and you often visited the lookout spot or the war memorial, trying to find some peace, but those spots were now shared with Tim. So, for the first time in a long time, you spent time in your apartment.

When you moved in, you hadn’t done anything to the place. Spaces were temporary in your experience. It was more hassle than it was worth to try to make the space your own if, in a year everything was a clean slate. But Dani was right. It had been close to six years now since you moved in. Six years. You had a stable job, you had friends here, it was time to accept that maybe this was more than temporary.

You started by unpacking the last few boxes that were stacked in the hallway. You replaced the command hooks hanging your picture frames with nails. You got new paint to liven up the living room from the basic beige it was before. You put the work into making your apartment really yours. You had to stop living behind walls and this was a first step.

The next step was to really open up.

***

You were waiting outside the dressing room for Tim to get out. You came down as soon as practice finished so you knew you wouldn’t miss him. You leaned against the cool concrete, trying to control your bouncing leg. He was one of the last out of the dressing room and you shyly smiled at the other players who left. When he came out, you popped off from the wall and stood in front of him.

“Do you still want to know why I picked hockey?” You could tell your question caught him off guard but he nodded nonetheless. “You had asked and I brushed it off...because it hurt to think about. Because it was my dad...He loved hockey. Everywhere we went, there was a team he could cheer for, but he always wished that his hometown team would win, no matter how bad they were. He took me to a game once. I had asked why he liked it so much, it was cold and loud and people were drunk and I’m pretty sure our team was losing. We were down in the crowd and he said to me, ‘Hockey is this great sport. It connects people. It creates families right before your eyes. Enemies can become teammates. This...this sport can be a family for you, anywhere you go. I hope one day you can find something that does the same thing for you.’ Two weeks later, he had a heart attack. So, I held onto the one thing that he found belonging in. I liked my math, it made sense, and I’m good at it. But when it came to doing something with my life, I just- I wanted something to make my dad proud of me, you know? I wanted to feel connected to him.”

Tim was silent but he pulled you into a hug, your head going into the crook of his neck. His arms went around your waist and he held you for a minute. “Your dad would be proud of you. I know he would. Why’d you tell me now though?”

“Well, friends share personal stuff, right?” You pulled away from the hug just enough to catch his eyes. You looked up at him hopefully, and he smiled.

“Yeah, they do.” He broke the hug, but kept an arm slung over your shoulder. “C’mon, friends also eat brussel sprouts for each other.” You laughed at his distaste for them and the two of you walked out the parking lot together, his arm still slung around your shoulders.

***

You looked up at the ceiling, your bedsheets twisted beside you. It had been about two weeks since you told Tim about your dad, and since then, the two of you had been exchanging texts daily. It felt familiar, even though both of you knew it was different. Not a bad different, just… different. You’d been over to his place a couple times and he came over for your place for a ‘welcome back’ dinner.

You were nervous to show him your apartment, but you knew you had grown into the space. It was no longer generic beige walls and command strips. The living room had an accent wall and you put nails in the wall to hang your family photos in the hallway. Tim took his time looking around your space, spending extra time in the hallway. He stopped in front of the picture of your family, all four of you, and smiled.

“My parents are coming into town when we play the Caps in December, if you want to meet them?” He had said when you sat down to eat. You sputtered your drink a little and set down the glass.

“Only if...you meet Dani when we go to Seattle in January?” His face broke into a grin and he nodded.

“I’d love that.” The rest of the dinner had no issues, just two friends catching up and getting familiar with each other again.

But he wanted you to meet his parents. He wanted you to meet the people who raised him, his family. And you didn’t have any hesitations. You wanted to meet the people who made Tim who he is.

This past week solidified that you knew what you wanted. You wanted to meet Tim’s family, you wanted to show him around Seattle, you wanted to be with him. If he still wanted to be with you.

If.

He had been pretty clear where he stood on his feelings, but the voice in the back of your mind taunted you with that one tiny two letter word. He might have seen how you reacted, how unstable you were, and how you weren’t ready to jump into things as a sign you didn’t want this. He could’ve taken your steps to being friends again as being just friends again. He could’ve-

You weren’t going to wait around to let what-if’s and might of’s and could’ve’s waft around in your head. You needed to talk to him, needed to see him. So in your pajama pants and a hoodie, you braved the Canadian night and drive to his house. You parked the car, rather haphazardly, but it could wait. You skipped a step walking up to his door and quickly phoned him.

You paced back and forth on the small porch as the phone rang three times before he picked up.

“Hallo?” His accent was thicker in his native language, the harsh constants sounding so soft from his lips.

“Can you come open the door?”

“What?”

“I’m outside. Can you open the door?”

“What? It’s like...early,”

A sigh escapes you. “Tim. I know. I know now.”

“Well if you looked at a clock before you left your place, you would’ve known earlier. That would’ve-”

“Tim.” You gulped and your voice trembled slightly. “I’m ready. I know what I want.” The tone of your voice dropped its lightheartedness and that alone was enough to shake the sleep from his mind. But your words? More than enough to get him out of bed and racing (as quietly as he could in the dark) towards you.

He opened the front door in his sleep joggers to see you pacing and shaking your arms. You hadn’t noticed him yet, so he took the opportunity to admire you. The way your hair fell, your Senator pajama pants that Brady gave you as a gag gift, the way you bit your lip between your teeth.

“Hey.” His voice broke you out of your trance, your head whipping around to see him standing in the doorframe.

“Hi.” Your voice was quiet, the nerves getting the best of you. You stood there for a while, just looking at each other. His hair was a mess and he was wearing the grey hoodie you knew for a fact was his favourite. “Oh, right, I have to go first. Um...Are- are you still sure about your feelings for me?” He nodded. “And-and they’re for sure, good feelings?”

“… They’re such good feelings.” You nodded and gave your body another shake through, as if to dissipate the nerves racing throughout your veins.

“I know it’s taken me a while to kinda sort everything out but… I like you too. That’s why hearing those things hurt so much. That’s why I had to take some time. I've been alone for most of my life and it was scary to let someone in so easily, unknowingly. You just waltzed in and made yourself at home in my heart and it felt like you belonged so I… I didn’t even realize you could hurt me. And when I heard those things, it hurt more. It just solidified that I should’ve stayed alone. You can’t get hurt if there’s no one to hurt you right? But every talk, every late night drive, everything we had...it was worth all the hurt. So I’m ready. I want to do this with you, even if it hurts. I don’t know if I can do life without you.” He pushed himself off of the doorframe and came to stand in front of you, his hand cupping your cheeks, soothing the skin under your eyes.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you and I don’t plan on doing it ever again, Y/n, you have to know that.” You nodded against his hands and you could feel some of his tension fade from his body. “Does this mean… we could be more than friends?”

“I want to be much more than friends with you, Tim.” You bit your lip to try to stop your smile from growing so wide, but it broke through when you saw how wide his smile was and how his eyes crinkled with joy.

“Does this mean I can kiss you now?” He asked softly, already leaning in. He left space between the two of you so you could decide but you easily leaned into him, your lips meeting. It was gentle but it was loving. You moved in sync, Tim’s hand moving to the back of your head to push you closer to him. Eventually, you pulled away for air.

“Schatz…” He breathed and you laughed lightly.

“You know, I don't think you've told me what that really means,” You said with a cheeky smile.

“Would you like me to say it in English, sweetheart?” He brushed his nose with yours.

“Hmm, German is fine,” You tilted your head upwards, almost brushing your lips with his. With your teasing, he let out a groan, bringing you in for another kiss. This time he broke for air, his eyes still slightly closed.

“You know, you cured my homesickness. I never felt like I missed home because I found home in you,” He whispered. Your heart melted and you brought your lips together with a passion he hadn’t seen from you before. Your hands tangled in his hair and he chased your lips as if it was a breakaway. When you broke for air, the two of you were breathless.

“As much as I want to keep doing that, it’s also very early and I am tired. Can we go back to bed please?” His arms were still around your waist, but he leaned back enough that you could see his face, puppy dog eyes and all. You nodded to his request with a soft smile, and went to remove yourself from his arms and go back to your car, but he tightened his grip.

“I got you now, so I’m not letting you go.” You buried your head in the crook of his neck and slowly the two of you made your way into the warm house. He led you through the dark hallways to his bedroom, giggling and sneaking kisses where you could.

You fell asleep so easily, the quickest you have the entire time you had lived in Ottawa. And it wasn’t only Tim’s warmth, or the way his sheets smell like hockey tape and his peppermint shampoo. You had finally opened yourself up. You had found that belonging your dad always wanted you to. And you found that in Tim; whether he knew it or not, he was home.

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[tiedyemillenialbullshit]

Nightmare

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Avenger Reader Word Count: 3,431 Summary: Your best friend finally comes to visit the compound after you join the Avengers. What starts out as a fun night out, quickly turns dire for you and Bucky. Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Feelings, Mentions of Alcohol and Drugs, PTSD/Nightmares, swearing

“AHHHH Y/N!!” You hear her before you see your best friend running towards you, not a care in the world that your entire team has also turned around to watch you two galavant towards each other like long lost sisters.

You catch Sarah in your arms and spin her around.

“Oh my god, I can’t believe you’re FINALLY HERE! And you’re early! Holy shit like I can’t believe you’re finally here in New York!! Let me introduce you to the team!” You grab her arm after she starts to show hesitance in meeting the Avengers all at once.

“Are you sure they have time? I don’t want to be a bother,” she says sheepishly.

“Oh my god Sarah, I talk about you all the time! They’re just as excited to meet you, come on.” You both walk towards the team still staring at you both near the entrance to the compound doing a quick debrief of a not-so-successful mission the day before.

“Guys, this is Sarah. Sarah this is-“ she cuts you off. “I know who you guys all are. It’s so nice to meet you! I’ll stay out of the way, I promise.” Everyone grins and introduces themselves to your best friend.

Nat smiles at you both, “On the contrary, you’re coming out with us tonight! No if’s, and’s or but’s”

Sarah seems to suddenly catch a second wind from her long flight and lets out a squeal of excitement.

You’re the newest to the “official” team, even though Steve and Fury had been trying to recruit you for years. You didn’t like the idea of the world knowing about your skill set and preferred to live a quiet life back in California. Ever since moving here, you’ve felt like maybe you weren’t home yet. Everyone was so nice and welcoming, but you missed your little house hidden in the outskirts of the National Parks in California. You missed the sun, the familiar smell of your patch of paradise and the general sense of room back home. Most importantly, you missed Sarah.

You were reluctant to invite her out to New York at first, but now that things seemed to be going smoothly, you sent for her via a car and private jet thanks to one Mr. Tony Stark. He was more than happy to help you out given your fresh and maybe sometimes bumpy arrival to the Avengers.

As everyone filed inside to break away before the evening festivities, Bucky caught your arm.

After holding you back for a second he said, “Hey, I can totally hang back tonight if you’d rather just be with Sarah and the team.”

You realize what he’s getting at. He also has some lack of feeling settled at the compound. It was something you bonded over when you first arrived. You both had similar pasts, even though they were at the same time lightyears apart.

“Buck, no. I think we’re all going out to Bleaker’s tonight! What’s a better way to get to know the team than bowling, beer, smoking inside, beer, old arcade games, more beer and maybe dancing?!”

Bucky gives you a quick glare out the corner of his eye before wrapping his metal arm around your shoulders to lead you inside after everyone.

“Fiiiiiiine, but I can’t promise I’ll behave.” You giggle, but suddenly feel a couple sets of eyes on you.

“And what do we have here?,” Tony asks with a smirk across his mouth. Sarah seems to be in the middle of an engaging conversation with Steve, so you don’t seem to have an easy out of this encounter. Bucky quickly drops his arm and steps a foot away from you.

“Uh, nothing. Y/N just seemed like maybe she wasn’t feeling well.”

“But I’m fine so here we are - have you seen Sam? Nat? Wanda? I told them we should be ready in a few hours and I jus-“

“Oh for Christ’s sake guys, your secret is safe with me,” Tony winks at you knowingly. You decide to take that as the end of the conversation and rush over to join Sarah.

“So! You have muscles.” Sarah says clearly at a loss of words looking at Steve in a tight shirt.

You and Bucky share a giggle, but pull Sarah away and save her from further embarrassment.

“What the fuck did I just say?” Sarah is about as red as a tomato as you drag her upstairs away from the awkward encounter. Steve looked a little flustered as well, which you file away in the back of your brain.

“Who cares! Let’s catch up and get ready for tonight.” Sarah is your best friend for a reason. Even though it had been 6 months since you last saw each other, it was like it was yesterday. You two spend the next few hours catching up, gossiping about each other’s families, friends, ex-boyfriends, etc.

“So! How are we doing in the boi department?” You turn around and face Sarah at the inquisitive tone in her question.

“What’s that supposed to mean? I’m good, I’m… I’m doing great, I mean yeah I’m good. WHY?” You’re stuttering and you don’t even care it’s obvious you’re blushing.

“Oh, you know. I mean, I’ve only recently met a few super soldiers, but I do think I can tell the there’s a spark between one and someone else.” Sarah so wants you to spill the tea but you promised Bucky you’d keep it quiet.

“Let’s just say things are developing and whatever you’d like to take from that you may.” You both launch into a giggle fit of her guessing and you denying certain aspects of Bucky Barnes.

When Wanda wanders into your room a few hours later, she starts laughing at what she sees. “You know you two are wearing like the same thing, right?” Exchanging confused looks at each other, you reply with a “AND?!”

Sam follows in with a smirk of his own. You’re bracing for his jokes but instead says “damn, OKAY! Everyone’s looking sharp tonight. Y/N, have you seen our bionic man around? Is he coming? He better come out tonight or I swear to…”

After Sam leaves to go find Bucky, the three of you wander down to find Nat and start the evening off with a shot or two. You aren’t much of a drinker, so one is enough for you. You much rather enjoy the company of your friend Mary Jane.

The team is getting silly with each other in the kitchen and quickly the room is filled with people yelling at each other to pregame harder, laughing when Nat’s little sister challenges Sam to a chugging contest and wins.

You feel a large hand at the small of your back. You can smell his cologne and know who it is immediately.

“Well don’t you look dashing tonight Sargent Barnes.” You lean in on impulse but stop yourself just as the girls turn around to see who you’re talking to.

“I was just going to say the same thing to you, sweets.” He mumbles in your ear before removing his hand and walking over to Sam.

The alcohol decides to hit you then, leaving you feeling empty that he’s not standing next to you anymore. Neither of you had wanted to have the “conversation” but you knew you were head over heels for him.

“CABS ARE HERE” screams Sam.

“Sam. For the love of God, stop watching Jersey Shore.” Natasha jokes to him.

At the same time Steve screams, “I understood that reference!” Eye rolls are exchanged as you all make your way outside.

The atmosphere is buzzing and you’re so excited to not just be out with your team, but to also have the only bit of family you had with you as well. You finally felt at home, at peace, and were ready for a fun night out.

Bleaker’s is one of those hole-in-the-wall dive bars that from the outside seems like a hard pass, but once you’re in, there’s no other place you’d rather spend a Saturday night. It’s true it started as a bowling alley in the 60’s. That still remains. What’s newer is the arcade in the back, where the old salon used to be. Jimmy bought the space next door, blew out the wall and filled it with arcade games that sometimes work and sometimes eat your money.

After years of being regular patrons, he knows your team well. The minute you walk in, he starts up all your favorite drinks.

“Ah! My best customers! I had a feeling I’d be seeing Earth’s mightiest heroes tonight.” You line up at the bar for whatever Jimmy decides you’re drinking tonight.

“Ah yes, two vodka on the rocks for my little Russian assassins. Sam here’s your vodka red bull which I don’t think you need, but here we are. Steve! Your drink of choice: an Old Style. Wanda, a cosmo for my favorite witch. And who do we have here, Y/N?”

You’re already both in hysterics at the old man behind the bar giving everybody a hard time. “Jimmy, this is my best friend Sarah. She’s visiting from California for a few days.”

“And whatever the lady wants can be put on my tab…” Steve butts in. Sarah immediately turns red but says “well in that case I’ll have vodka soda with lime please!”

Bucky has come up behind you and now you’re both laughing and watching the two of them stare at each other like no one else is in the room.

“Oh no, what did you do Y/N?”

“Let it play out, he’s not completely tripping over his words yet, maybe he’ll finally land a good girl.” You hush to Bucky.

Jimmy stares as well in amusement. “And you two? Your usual?”

“Yes’sir!” You shout over the growing music. Jimmy hands you each a jack and Diet Coke. You tell yourself it’s okay because it’s diet, but you know that’s a bunch of bullshit.

The other great thing about Bleaker’s? The dance floor downstairs. You always joke around that it seems like a nightclub that never closes in Amsterdam or something, but you’re serious. It could be 3 pm and sunny and you’d never know. It’s in the basement, it's always dark and the music is almost always too loud.

Usually that would gross you all out, but the energy tonight is pushing you all downstairs.

You reach back and grab Bucky’s hand not really caring who sees. It’s been months of sneaking around and either everyone knows and is playing it off like they don't or you’re really good at hiding it. Regardless, you’re over hiding. Maybe showing a little PDA tonight will get him out of his shell.

Sarah and Steve are no where in sight, assuming they’re ahead of you, you follow the team downstairs.

Minutes turn into hours. Everyone is dancing, laughing, sweating, screaming the lyrics to every song, and for a little while you can forget you’re a group of superheroes, and can just be normal 30-something year-olds.

You mostly dance with Bucky and quickly realize he’s a better dancer than you thought he would be. Those moves from the 1940’s must still be relevant in some way today, because the way he's grinding up on you and not caring if anyone sees just does something to you.

You work the room, finding Sarah, Wanda, Nat, even Steve for a song before you realize you don't see Bucky. You give it a few minutes thinking maybe he is in the bathroom. After 15 minutes though, you grab Steve’s attention and motion for him to check the bathroom while you check outside.

You race to the alley where you find Jimmy on a smoke break. “Hey Jimmy, have you seen Bucky? I can’t find him.”

“Oh yeah, doll, he took off in a cab about a half hour ago. Looked real flustered, but I didn’t want to press.”

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. You thought you felt his mood shift about an hour ago, he was becoming stiff and quiet. You thought maybe he was just drinking a lot but now you’re realizing the loud music, strobe lights and base must have been triggering him.

“Ugh I’m such a bitch,” you huff as you send Steve a S.O.S text.

You: Hey, Jimmy said he just left. I'm sure he's heading home. I'm going to go find him.

Sire Captain Rogers: Go ahead. I think Sarah and I can find something to do while you find Buck. ;)

You: Yeah I’m sure you can.

You: BEHAVE. She’s my best friend.

Sire Captain Rogers: I know Y/N, don’t worry about us. Let me know when you find him.

You lock your phone and hop in a cab back to the compound.

No one is up or around when you enter through the front. The kitchen has been cleaned up, the dishes done. Probably thanks to THURSDAY, Tony’s beta bot for “cleaning up after you assholes trash the place.”

You smirk and head for the elevators. Heading straight to Bucky’s room, you can tell his light is on but something seems off. You don’t like to use your powers on friends or in the compound, but you close your eyes and reach out with your mind to find his aura. Your eyes snap open. You don’t sense him, you just see red.

Taking this as a good excuse to break into a friend’s room, you burst into the room to find it in disarray. Everything is toppled over, broken glass is on the floor, the bathroom light is on, but all you can see is his blood on the door and the floor. You’re panicked, trying to piece together what happened.

Again, you close your eyes and reach out for the familiar energy of Bucky. You find him in your room on the floor.

“What the fuck?,” you mumble and sprint up the stairs to your apartment. You shoot Steve a text on your way up.

You: Found him, looks like a bad one. I’ll let you know if I need you.

Sir Captain Rogers: Thanks Y/N. I’m just a call away, let me know if you need anything. Night.

Upon entering, you sense he’s in distress. His heart rate is elevated, he’s incredibly sweaty and is panting like a dog.

“Bucky? Buck, it’s me, it’s Y/N.”

Bucky stirs and jumps into a defensive standing position quicker than you can blink. You flip the lights on with a “BABE. Baaabe, it’s me. It’s okay, you’re safe. We’re in the compound. You had a nightmare.”

Bucky’s eyes are wide and alarmed, but you can tell the moment he recognizes you.

Rushing over to you, he takes you into a big hug. “Oh my god. What happened? Are you okay, did I hurt you?”

“No Bucky, no I just found you a minute ago. You had another bad one, what do you need me to do right now for you?”

Bucky stands back and rubs his swollen eyes. “I need to shower, can you help me?”

Typically, this is where it gets exciting, but you knew what he means. Water grounds him. He doesn’t feel like he’s falling in water. It helps him visualize the stress washing off of him.

You help him strip and get in the shower, but before you can even take his jeans off, he jumps in and pulls you in with him. You realize how desperate he is for whatever he’s feeling to pass and your heart sinks.

You’re both standing there, almost fully clothed holding each other. This is the worst you’ve seen him in a long time.

“I’m so sorry if I ruined your night, Y/N. The base sounded like the train, the lights looked like the machine they used on me, what the fuck.”

You aren’t sure what to do so you decide to sit on the ground and pull him down with you. You position yourself behind him so his back is in your chest. Even though he’s so much larger than you, he sinks down enough for you to reach over his shoulders and hold him.

“It’s okay Barnes, just breathe with me. You’re safe. You’re with me, and we’re home. Nobody is going to touch you. I’ve got you, you won’t fall.”

You take in deep breaths so he can match your breathing.

After about 45 minutes, the hot water is out in the tank. Bucky sits forward and turns towards you. You want him to lead right now, so you don’t say anything. Neither does he, but the look in his eyes are telling you something about tonight is different.

With a soft smile on your lips, you cup his cheek until he is really looking at you. “Hun, let’s go lay down, ya? Let me help get you dried off.” Bucky hates when you fuss over him, so when he doesn’t argue, you know to be extra gentle with him.

After getting him up and out of the shower, you think skin-to-skin contact doesn’t seem sexual right now, it feels intimate in a grounding sense, and you know that’s exactly what he needs right now. Bucky seems dazed, almost like he got hit too hard in the head. You yourself are of course a tad over-served, and are quickly realizing the adrenaline of this entire situation is rubbing off.

You get Bucky into bed and turn to make sure his phone is plugged in and that he has a glass of water, but he grabs your wrist before you can move away. “Just leave it, it’s fine.”

“Buck, just let me-“ he grabs your wrist harder.

“Y/N. Please just stay here. Please.”

The entire time you’ve been together, he’s done a lot of things but begging you for anything is not one of them. Suddenly the phone and whatever hell else you were doing doesn’t seem important anymore.

You climb into your usual spot next to him and decide maybe you’ll try to get him to open up. The moment the back of your head hits the pillow, Bucky is facing you. His pleading eyes seem like they want to tell you everything that’s going on in his head, but you know pushing him to talk will just make the nightmares come flooding back too soon.

Instead, you decide to lay on your back and pull him to lay on your chest.

“Just listen to my heart beat, Bucky.” You hear him take a deep breath and settle into your chest.

You start and stop yourself from trying to say something comforting. You’re terrified to say the wrong thing at such a crucial moment. Typically these bad episodes are reserved for a Steve house call. You realize as he’s settling into a comfortable position that he hasn’t asked you to call Steve yet. Bucky trusts you in a way you didn’t realize until now.

You don’t know when, but you start humming the first calming song that comes in your head.

I’ll be seeing you In all the old familiar places That this heart of mine embraces All day through

Bucky picks his head up to look at you. Oh fuck.

“Where did you hear that song?,” he says to you with shiny eyes.

“You sing it all the time when you’re concentrating. I looked it up and added it to my ‘bath time/relax’ playlist. I didn't know Billie Holliday was a favorite of yours."

Bucky was looking at you like maybe this was the first time he saw you, like really saw you. “My mom used to sing that around the house when she was missing my dad.”

“Oh I’m so sorry, I didn’t know. I can hum a diff-“ you’re cut off with the most searing kiss Bucky has ever given you. He’s crying when he pulls back to look at you again. “Will you keep singing it?”

In that small cafe The park across the way The children's carousel That chestnut tree, the wishing well

By the time you finish the second verse, he has physically relaxed in your arms. You continue rubbing your hand up and down his back and shoulder, stopping to play with his long hair every once in a while.

I'll be seeing you In every lovely summer's day In every thing that's light and gay I'll always think of you that way

“I forgot how much I love hearing this song sung around me.” Bucky whispers so quietly you almost miss it.

I'll find you in the morning sun And when the night is new I'll be looking at the moon But I'll be seeing you…

You stop your caressing when you feel him sit up on one arm.

He leans down to kiss you but stops short to whisper “I love you Y/N.” You kiss him back and wrap your arms around his shoulders, and when you say “I love you too, Bucky,” you’ve never been more sure of something in your life.

[oleksiak-pettersson]

Sugar Daddy - Elias Pettersson

Because today is my birthday, I've decided to spoil y'all with some of my older smutty fics from my old blog (oh-holy-alien). Love you guys!

Elias wouldn’t call himself your sugar daddy. You are in a relationship. Fully committed to each other and labelled as such, but the way he spoils you could be considered as sugar daddy behaviour to the outside observer.

To you, he was just your fiance. He was two years older than you but most of the time you couldn't even tell. It bugged you to know that people thought of him as your sugar daddy. Elias just liked to spoil you, why couldn’t people understand.

It could be as simple as the weekly flowers he bought you or as complex as the lake house he bought you in Sweden for the summers.

It was getting a little hard to ignore people’s stares too when they saw the rock on your hand. You could just tell they were thinking you were a gold digger, of course, it had to do with the fact that the man on your arm was a very successful NHL player that earned a nice big fat cheque.

It couldn’t help either that all your clothes were designer, courtesy of Elias. Or that your shoes were either Jimmy Choos or Louboutins. Or even that your favourite purse was the cutest little Chanel bag of which Elias had insisted you needed.

He liked to spoil you and it was evident.

Especially as you stared at the car parked in the driveway with the pretty purple bow on it.

“Surprise!” Elias smiles, hands on your hips. They had previously covered your eyes to hide the expensive car from you.

“Elias, what the heck is this?” You turn to him in disbelief.

“Engagement present,” he presses a kiss to your shoulder, “it’s a Tesla Model S. Completely electric.”

You can tell he’s proud of himself for this purchase. You can’t bring yourself to tell him that it’s too much.

“I think we’ve watched the Twilight series one too many times, bub.” You laugh as his face contorts with confusion.

“What do you mean?” His hands are on his hips now. You can’t help but giggle at the fact that he looks lit a suburban PTA mom.

“This is an Edward Cullen move, babe. He got Bella an engagement car. There better not be a wedding gift car.” You cross your arms across your chest, faking seriousness, but the smile on your face tells him you’re teasing him playfully.

“Well, there won’t be a wedding car now.” He puts his hands back on your hips and pulls you close to slowly press his lips to yours. His thumbs are playing with the fabric of your skirt.

You pull away for a second to breathe, “You didn’t deny that you got the idea from Twilight.”

Elias rolls his eyes. “About we take it for a drive, huh?” He hands you the keys.

You squeal excitedly as you take the keys and head to the door, Elias beats you to it. He pulls your door open, accepting the kiss you offer him before you sit in the driver's seat.

He shuts your door and jogs around to the passenger side. Elias opens the door and lowers himself down onto the seat. He clicks his seatbelt into the buckle, then rests his left hand on your thigh. He toys with the hem of your skirt.

You drive through the Vancouver evening, leaving the city and navigating yourself towards the mountains, finding a hidden logging road where no one else seems to be close by.

You shift the car into park and climb onto Elias’s lap.

“What are you doing?” He asks, not in a way that suggests he doesn't enjoy you on top of him. He moves both hands up your thighs to under your skirt, one hand going to cup where you need him most.

“Was thinking we could break in the new car.” You raise your eyebrows while reaching down to lower his seat.

The lever pulls up quickly and the seat falls just as quick. Elias manages to grab your head and rest it in the junction of his neck before the seat jolts back, effectively avoiding your heads colliding.

Before he can press his lips to yours, you’ve sunk to the floor in front of him.

“What are you doing?” This time his voice is laced in confusion.

“Going to thank you for my gift,” you say slyly as you undo his jeans and begin to pull them down his thighs.

You pull his boxers down too, his half-hard cock greets you. You smile and wrap both hands around it, starting to jerk him. You twist your wrists once then go back to working them up and down, making his cock harder.

“Fuck, Älskling, fuck.” His eyes scrunch up and he throws his head back.

You take that as your cue to bring his cock into your mouth, letting your hands fall to his thighs as you let yourself take him down your throat. You bob up and down once slowly, Elias groans and lets his hands tangle in your hair.

He won’t fuck your face like this. He’ll let you thank him properly the way you want to.

You begin to bob faster, a hand coming up to fondle at his balls. You can tell he’s getting close as the words spewing from his mouth are in Swedish. He suddenly pulls you off.

You open your mouth to whine but he shushes you, gesturing to get on his lap. You slide your panties down your legs quickly and climb into his lap.

You line his cock up with your pussy and let yourself fall into his lap. You moan at how beautifully full you feel. At the angle he’s at, his cock is perfectly hitting your g-spot. You both moan in sync, sharing a smile before kissing. You begin to move up and down, slowly at first just trying to drive him nuts. Elias grips your hips tightly, you can see the sweat rolling down his forehead.

There will be bruises on your hips tomorrow, but you don’t care. You lift and lower yourself onto him quicker and quicker, rocking back and forth a bit to really stimulate Elias.

His head is thrown back, pure ecstasy on his face as you wrap your arms around his neck and muffle your noises in his neck.

He’s hitting the perfect spot again and again, and you can feel your orgasm coming.

“I’m close,” you murmur into his neck.

“Fuck, me too.” He starts to thrust his hips to meet yours.

The pressure of his cock against your walls and hitting that spot causes you to clench. He thrusts harder as you do, the feeling of your walls tightening causing him to go wild. You cum, the pressure within you finally cracking.

You tighten reflexively around him as you cum, practically coaxing the cum out of him. He thrust hard inside once last time as he cums inside you.

You rest against his chest as you both catch your breath. He laughs quietly, causing you to look up at him.

“What are you are you laughing at?” You inquire softly, rubbing your fingers on the neckline of the shirt he still wears.

“I just feel like such a sugar daddy right now.” He laughs a little louder.

You can’t help but giggle with him.

You end up driving home, no panties and Elias’ cum dripping out of you.

Bonus

“He got me an engagement car, mom.” You laugh into the phone.

The woman on the other end pauses before replying, “who are you marrying? Edward Cullen, jeez.”

“That’s what I said!” You laugh, sending a look at Elias who sits on the other end of the couch.

[trop1cal-punk]

The sheriff never sleeps

Summary: Jimmy already wasn't sleeping but the bandit outside is making sure he doesn’t Song listened to while writing: Allies or Enemies by The crane wives Word count: 1056

The meeting earlier wasn’t his favorite activity. Jimmy couldn't help that Joel's words sunk in deeper than he wished. The god's laugh echoed in his mind as he tossed and turned, grumbling to himself as he did so. It wasn’t his favorite thing to do, especially if he landed awkwardly on either of his horns, but Jimmy didn’t really feel like getting up at the moment. 

Jimmy sighed again now on his back until his ear twitched at the sound of footsteps. He looked toward the window, the moon was high in the sky. There was no reason in the NETHER anyone should be up at this hour. It had to be borderline freezing outside. He was debating whether to actually get up and go look who was out there until he heard his rocking chair outside creak. He cursed under his breath as he stumbled to the window. 

Then came the sounds of Banjo music.  

It wasn't too loud so as to not disturb anyone but him. But good lord was it annoying at this hour. He leaned out the open window to grit through his teeth, “What in the Nether are you doing out here Setting Sun.” 

The hat-covered person paused playing and looked up at him, “Just came to visit my favorite Sherriff but seems you were already awake.” The only thing Jimmy ever saw on its face was the wide smile. It had never once taken the hat off. The beads on the rim and on the crown of the hat reflect the moonlight. He had always wondered how long it took to do that kind of beadwork. There was one time Jimmy did catch up to it and tried to take the damned hat off, it scratched him and hissed before sprinting off, leaving him to clean his own wound. He swore instead of nails it had claws. 

“Yeah, I am what about it,” Now all Jimmy wanted to do is be left with his own thoughts and not really deal with the threat just downstairs, even if it would be the perfect distraction. 

“You’re usually not up this late, that is unless you're still doing paperwork, but by your pajamas, I don't think you are.” Its mischievous grin turned into a solid line. “Something on your mind?”

Jimmy huffed, “It doesn’t matter, and shouldn't you be asleep?” 

It shrugged its shoulders, the fringe on it moving as the wind rolled by, “Probably but! I can’t have my favorite Sheriff being too tired for me to tease in the mornin’! Talk to me, Big man Sheriff!” 

Jimmy raised an eyebrow, “Didn't you come to just play your banjo at me to wake me up.” 

It waved at him, “That's not important here, come downstairs. I won't hurt you none, not tonight at least. I'm sure you got enough on that mind of yours.” 

Jimmy huffed again, but not in the same way as he did before, this time in agreeance. He didn't really know what compelled him to actually go outside, but he did. When he opened the front door, Setting Sun had moved off the rocking chair and onto the ground instead. It motioned for him to sit. Jimmy exhaled as he sat rather hard on the rocking chair that creaked under him. It fiddled with the banjo, finding the strings as it leaned its back on the railing. 

It didn't make eye contact with him, but when it did find the right strings a quiet melody started to play. Every other time it had come to haunt him with its banjo the music made his adrenaline rush. The upbeat music made his heart race. But this time, it was like a lullaby. Combined with the back and forth of the rocking chair and the music now drowning out his once whirling mind, his eyes became heavy. He didn't really remember that the person in front of him was a bandit that had run circles around him before. He crossed his arms letting his head hang and closed his eyes. 

Weayaya watched as the sheriff slowly stopped rocking, head lulled forward. It slowed until it was far too long in-between string plucks. The song was a lullaby its father had played before he passed, leaving Weayaya all alone. It was no shocker that Weayaya was without any friends. Being unwanted anywhere it went. People feared it. But that's what its father taught it. Its father’s words echoed in its mind as it looked up to the stars twinkling, “If you're going to go down my path, it's dangerous to love, but my child is it rewarding.”

Weayaya maybe finally understood what he meant. The sheriff was fun to be around, not that it would ever admit to his face. Getting lonely eventually gets boring and it didn't really know how else to get others to pay attention. Sure the Sherriff got annoyed and sometimes pissed off but no matter how hard Weayaya pushed his buttons, he never got violent. Sure handcuffs and being thrown in those cells with the too-wide of bars were annoying but this cat and mouse chase is what made its life exciting. Every time it tried to stick around someone else, Weayaya always found itself confused and lost. The sheriff was easy to read, an open and shut book. Weayaya never crossed his boundaries and the Sherriff never crossed its. There was a mutual understanding Weayaya couldn’t put into words. They just understood each other. 

Weayayas eyes traced over the dark town and then back to the sheriff. Sure the town was mildly well lit, but that didn't stop a skeleton from walking out of a cave somewhere and possibly shooting the Sherriff. To add on, it would be far too long of a horse ride home at these hours. So Weayaya stayed, never letting its eyes shut. 

Its eyes were heavy by the time the sun started to peak over the mesa mountains. Quietly, Weayaya pushed open the front gate of his porch, looking back one more time to see if the creak had woken him up. When he didn’t budge, Weayaya made its way to its horse, throwing a leg over the saddle before taking off far into the desert. Leaving the Sherriff to wake up all alone wondering if it was all dream.