#Toshiro isn’t a bad guy

[dadsbongos]

how to (unintentionally) drive away a suitor

5.4 k words / warnings - misunderstandings, you're manipulative but in a marriage-seeker way, lame ass exposition dump at the beginning sorry

summary - you go to The Island in hopes of finding a suitor better than what your parents picked, you meet Laios. disaster ensues.

posting while bleaching my hair send hlep ~~~

When you were five, your father’s first hunting dog died. Matilda. A hound mix he praised as if she were his firstborn, and that would sound neglectful if she didn’t feel like your eldest sister. When she died, a true member of the family died. Your child heart exploding out of your little chest with the mosaic of grief ripping you this way and that. It was so ugly, you hadn’t expected to feel that way until your parents or a human sister croaked on you.

It’d also inspired you to do better for yourself than what destiny had in mind. As the youngest in a long line of children, you had little hope of a large inheritance from your well-off father. Instead, you would marry rich and smart and handsome.

Leading you, with a throbbing disinterest in the suitor picked by your parents, to set for The Island in the year 510.

Where you met a very strange man named Laios Touden.

Denial

Month 1 - your first proposition

“We should celebrate with drinks,” you skim a finger along the waistline of his cuirass, “Another dive with no deaths.”

“Oh, yeah,” Laios nods, grinning blandly at you, “You think I could rope Shuro into sticking around this time? He usually skips nights out unless Falin asks.”

“I was thinking something a little more private. Just you and me, maybe?”

“Sure,” suddenly his brows furrow, a serious ridge setting across his lips, “Is there something you need? I know rent in the western part of The Island is starting to go up, do you live there?”

“Laios, I- “ you cut yourself off before reminding him you two live on the same street because a sudden idea strikes you. He’s doing this on purpose. Of course, he is. He’s the type of guy that wants you to actually ask for it, “I mean, if you really want then I guess everyone coming isn’t so bad.”

But two can play at that game.

“Okay, great! I’ll let the party know,” he gives you a thumbs up and turns towards the rest of your group as they pack for the surface.

You watch him wrap an arm around Toshiro and beam at the withdrawn man. You deduce that he’s the type that likes to be chased. Which you feel is a little beneath you, but you’re willing to play a long game as long as he makes it worth your time.

Month 2 - the time you take him to dinner

“This place is so quiet,” Laios murmurs, both hands splayed across the table.

You study his fingers, thick and red at the joints -- you bet a gold wedding band would glitter nicely on his hand. Candle light flickers suddenly, a shadow sharpening across his face as he looks around. This snags your attention, you lean forward and curl both arms on the table, chest pressing into the well.

“Well, it’s nice, right?”

“I guess,” he avoids looking you in the face, instead focusing on your painted lips before flitting to the table, “I just feel like it's more for couples, right?”

This is it!

“Huh, you think so?”

“Mhm,” his eyes settle between your own, observing the curve from your forehead to your nose.

“I bet we make a pretty couple, then.”

“Oh,” he nods slowly, mulling over the suggestion, “Probably. I’d say we’re both decently attractive people.”

Is this it?

Just as you go to ask what exactly he means by that, your food is ready and Laios starts rambling about how hungry he was regardless of the awkward atmosphere. It makes no sense, but he’s the next village chief of his hometown so you let it pass.

Month 6 - the time you two take a walk

“Thanks for accompanying me.”

Laios waves off your gratitude, “It was nice to find out we live on the same street anyway.”

You bite your tongue from telling him that he should already know this in favor of boldly wrapping an arm around his. A rehearsed yelp splices your throat; practiced stumble rocking you askew. Immediately, you set to memorizing the feel of his beefy bicep around yours, wondering how his waist feels. His thighs. His neck and calves and cheeks.

“I saw a rat,” the lie slips easily, spare hand coming up to coyly cup your own cheek.

“Really?” he peeks over your head, “Where?”

“Laios, that’s not important!”

“I didn’t hear any squeaking, do you think it was trying to be quiet?”

“Laios!” you pinch his arm, apologetically rubbing over the tender skin when he whines, “I hate rats…”

“They’re just- “ your sudden furrowing brows and massive scowl halts the rest of his sentence, “Sorry. Are you scared of them?” before you can respond, he spins you towards his other side -- arms still linked tightly, “If you heard it over here, it’s probably best I stay on this side.”

“Aww,” you tilt your head against his shoulder, “That’s actually so sweet, Laios. Thank you.”

“Uh-huh,” you’re too blinded by the gesture to notice his intense stare scavenging along the dark ground, if you did then you probably would’ve realized he just wanted to see a rat.

Month 11 - the time you find his gourmet guide

“Is this why you started a party?”

“No,” his face flushes rogue from forehead to collarbones, eyes darting away from you. Hands twitching to rip the book from your own.

“You’re an awful liar,” you wave the stained, peeling green book -- careful to not rip any of his carefully placed tabs or note cards in the swaying, “Why hide this? Everyone already knows you’re chock full of monster trivia.”

Laios sighs quietly, reaching out for the book, and he seems genuinely surprised with what little fight you put up. He smooths one of the curling edges of the cover under his thumb, “This book hasn’t gotten the best reception before. It's easier to just avoid people seeing it.”

Somewhere in your chest, there’s a twinge and ache before you’re speaking again -- for once no plan or motive to your words, “That’s terrible, Laios. You should be able to show it off.”

“You think so?” he grins.

Technically comforting him will only advance your plan to wed, but strangely you’re finding that you just… want to. You don’t want him to filter himself to live, that sounds cruel.

“You can talk to me about it anytime,” you don’t find monsters so fascinating -- to you they’re no different from a common beast, what does it matter that they’re eaten by Laios? Despite your own indifference, you want nothing more than to indulge Laios, “I’d love to hear about how they taste.”

And you’re not sure where that desire comes from.

“I haven’t been able to eat one yet, but I’m hoping to. I can’t find time to traverse the first few floors by myself.”

You just know that it feels right to see him excited.

“You don’t have to go by yourself now, I can join. You’ll be able to go deeper that way, right?” you laugh at his flaming cheeks, “And what luck: I’m a support mage, you couldn’t ask for a better setup.”

“I’ll have to see when our next rest period is, that way we won’t be exhausted before going on our own.”

And when you’re in bed alone later that night, you justify to yourself that having a secret between one another will lay good foundation for future intimacy. You pretend that was on your mind the entire time you made the offer.

Year 2 - the time you invite him into your home

“I have lychees. It’d be a shame to let them go bad, you know?”

“What are lychee?” Laios glances from your neck to your room door.

“You’re kidding,” you twist the knob and swing it open with the weight of your body, thudding against the wall to allow Laios entry, “They’re fruits! Imports from the Eastern Archipelago, I would’ve thought you’d hear about them since you pester Toshiro about the area all the time…”

Laios’ head is on a full axis swivel to find anything unfamiliar, ready to taste all your excitement about the fruits, “No, never came up,” he watches you stride past him to a cabinet, “By the way, whose Toshiro?”

Quietly, you laugh to yourself, pulling down a rocky, pinkish ball. Laios is too busy thinking about the damage it’s looking to do to his bare hand to process the fact you never answered his question.

(you thought he was joking)

“Consider this a gift for walking me home again.”

“You asked,” he shrugs, watching as you squeeze around the fruit until it cracks in the middle, then peeling the shell away, “Besides, we live on the same street so it’s not out of my way.”

You hope he says that because he remembered, rather than having ‘discovered’ it for the fourth time. To stop yourself from asking clarification, you slice the pearly fruit in two, plucking the dark seed before handing both halves to Laios.

“I’ve heard some people just pop the whole thing in their mouth, but I’ve never tried it that way,” you confess, watching him roll the fruit from one cheek to the other before chomping down.

Laios’ eyes flutter shut, a muted moan following, “That’s sweet.”

“I know, right?”

“But I still get hints of citrus.”

“I know, right?!”

He points to the other lychee in your palm, “Do you have more, or…?”

You don’t.

“Have it,” you peel and deseed the one in your hand to press against his lips, “Say ‘ahh’!”

He smiles faintly at the cooing, popping his mouth open for you to slide the fruit past his teeth and onto his tongue. A soft kiss tickles your fingertips as he mutters, “Thanks.”

“Uh, yeah,” you pull back slowly, tangling your fingers behind your back and rocking onto the balls of your feet nervously, “Yeah, of course.”

You’ve never been nervous this way around a man before. You’ve felt fear and you’ve felt hatred and you’ve had crushes, but none of those have made your heart pound quite so hard.

It’ll be good to be attracted to your husband, you think, anybody can marry into power but it takes a real hunter to find power so handsome and polite.

Year 3 - the time you ask him to marry you

“We should get married,” you blurt, interrupting Laios as he ponders aloud the best way to safely boil a scorpion.

Laios darts up from his book, wide eyes unabashedly boring into your soul, “What?”

“You and me,” you’ve chased enough, now you’re ready for him to get serious -- you can’t live like this. Dangling just out of reach, only to be abruptly yanked at his whim. Your parents want to meet your fiance, the one you’ve abandoned home to find: the one you’re apparently certain is better than their choice for you. You need him to admit defeat before you go insane, “We should get married.”

“That’s what I thought you said, but I wasn’t sure,” he closes his beloved gourmet guide around a bookmark you crafted specially for him from braided yarn and beads. It had multiple tassels for slotting various spots through the guide simultaneously to more easily find sections he was currently occupied with rather than sort through tabs. He loves its practicality, and he loves it more when he thinks about how you made it with him in mind.

He thinks you’re nice. He thinks you’re charming. He likes spending time with you. You even already know about his monster obsession, and you’re on-board!

Which is basically the best he can get, right?

Dinners with his parents were silent, and the room’s temperature would sink to match their chilly demeanors.

Dinners with you would be warm, and the quiet moments would be comfortable.

“Sure,” he eventually answers, when he finds no protesting nausea bubbling in his gut he takes it as a good sign, “We can get married.”

Not the exact response you’d been hoping for. Though, you should’ve been more direct, Laios is stubbornly socially inept after all.

You’ll mark it as progress anyway, overjoyed Laios is baseline willing. Which is enough for you.

Definitely enough.

Definitely. Just. Enough.

Anger

Upon arrival to the dungeon three years ago, you found it difficult to acclimate to the fact that death was not the end down here. When you saw your first corpse on the second level, you were nigh inconsolable in the weary arms of Toshiro as he mumbled assurances in your ear.

Now, as a seasoned adventurer, you’re reasoning that coldblooded murder isn’t immoral in the dungeon.

(of course, it is, and also of course, you won’t murder anybody. but- )

You rather like the image of the woman flirting with Laios exploding

Honestly the longer he goes without refusing her, the more you like the image of him exploding too.

“Laios is an idiot,” Toshiro again is the one to comfort you, “It’s best not to watch.”

You’re sure he’s right. You’re also sure you want to keep watching -- which will entirely ruin your mood for the crawl ahead of your party. This is only your first day, on the first level, during the first meal before you all officially set off. And Laios is explaining to a strange, yet beautiful, woman the way a slime can seep out overhead and suffocate her to death. She isn’t even appreciating the knowledge, she’s just staring at his stupid pink lips.

“Once she hears what he’s saying, she’ll lose all interest,” Toshiro adds, then continuing as your glare fails to subside, “It isn’t like you two are actually married. She probably thinks he’s single.”

“He is single,” Chilchuck buds in, hands locked behind his head, “Inter-party relationships are bad news, you know? I’ve seen lots of people fall apart because of jealousy and cheating,” he shoots daggers at Toshiro briefly, “Pining is just the first step to an all out collapse.”

You gasp at the accusation. You are not pining!

“I don’t even like him that way. We should just get married for the land and wealth advantages!”

You entertain his monster fantasies for the money, you feed him lychees for the status, and you’re fiending to rip that woman away for the property expansion. That’s all! His being handsome is just a bonus, not a factor. His soft heart is a neat detail, not something you dream about holding.

Chilchuck doesn’t believe you. And you don’t think you believe yourself at this point either.

Depression

In the wake of Chilchuck’s ominous warning: you’ve been avoiding Laios. You’ve been avoiding most of your party, actually. First to lay and last to rise from your bedroll to most effectively close yourself off from nipping at Laios again.

He hadn’t even managed the nerve to ask what had you so perturbed following his conversation with the floozy on the first floor. He just strolls along, normal as he could hope to be while you languish in the back of the party with Toshiro. You wonder if Laios notices you’re not at his side, you wonder what precisely is going through his head. Did he notice she was flirting? Did he care? Is he still keen on marrying you?

Was he ever?

Toshiro catches the sudden exasperated huff you let out, you rub at your aching eyes. While he detests Laios’ clueless and overly familiar nature, he does feel grateful to work with you. He’d consider it a massive shame if you were to drop from the party because of emotional duress.

“Read any good books lately?”

Your hands lower, eyes blinking sluggishly until you’re staring at him with full inquisition, “What…?”

Maintaining a forward stare, Toshiro reaffirms his resolve, “Humor me.”

“Uh, well…” you comb through your brain for any answer other than the honest one, exhaustion and melancholy blurring your lying ability, “Just one.”

Eager to strengthen your bond and hopefully secure your stay in the party when this Laios fiasco fully explodes, Toshiro smiles softly at you, “Tell me about it.”

“It’s, well, old. Really old. A little gourmet guide…” you pout, “Laios and I read it together.”

“Oh,” Toshiro clears his throat, “Sorry.”

Bargaining

Laios could not seem to care less as the handsome dwarf perched at your side pays you yet another compliment. A shred of you feels terrible, terrible pity for the man as every other second your attention sears across the packed tavern to your party. To the blondie still in his armor; the blondie not even looking your way.

“Another drink, then?”

“Hm?” you beat ungracefully, forgetting you were meant to be charming the man.

“Would you like another drink?” he gestures to the barrels behind the bar, “On my coin, of course,” his tone falters, head shifting to follow yours, “I get the idea you need to forget this night.”

“Oh, I- no, it’s nothing…” you risk another peek at Laios, finding him somehow more disinterested in you than before -- thoroughly enjoying a one-sided conversation with Toshiro, “I’m not…”

“Better ways to get your mister’s attention than flirting.”

“Oh,” you’re embarrassed to be figured out like this, “I’m sorry. Really, I can’t- God- I’m sorry.”

“He’s lookin’ this way.”

Chancing it, you confirm that Laios is now looking at the both of you. His amber eyes flit from your face to the man beside you, to the floor. He returns all focus to Toshiro.

“Wow.”

From pitier to pitied at breakneck speed is more jarring than Laios’ carelessness.

“He said he wanted to marry me,” you reason.

“Did he now?” the dwarf so obviously disbelieves you, you’re sick just hearing his voice.

“Yeah!”

The dwarf nods slowly, a sarcastic lilt in his following words, “Seems like he meant it.”

“I’m not drinking anymore…” you slide off the bar stool, pausing when the man’s voice punches your gut once more.

“You should find someone more attentive to you.”

Racing away from the dwarf, you tug Laios away from your party’s table by his elbow. You’re glaring, you’re glaring so hard and so viciously that it genuinely startles him.

“Are you okay?” his neck cranes to gaze upon the dwarf, “You were talking to that guy, right? Did he freak you out?”

“So you knew I was with him?” you scoff, “Don’t you care at all?”

Laios shrugs, he didn’t see flirting -- he has no idea what you’re talking about, and he doesn’t want to seem like a nightmare boss, so… “Not really, I guess.”

“Are you serious?!”

“It’s not a crime for you to unwind at a bar. Besides, it isn’t like we belong to each other or something.”

You turn suddenly, back completely to him before charging out of the bar -- Laios chases, disliking how this conversation is slated to end. He slams into you at the edge of the street, and when he tries balancing you by the shoulders you knock his hands away.

“I thought- “ you circle back to stare at his face, “I thought we were… I was always on top of you, and we- I said- you said we should get married.”

Laios squirms with humiliation, then irritation, “Well, you said it weird. Marcille says that stuff to Falin all the time. Why didn’t you just ask to be together?”

“I did!”

“Did you?”

“All the time…”

Acceptance

Laios squirms with humiliation, then irritation, “Well, you said it weird. Marcille says that stuff to Falin all the time. Why didn’t you just ask to be together?”

“I did!”

“Did you?”

“All the time…”

“I never knew,” he blinks at you, and the most dreadful thing is you know he’s not bluffing. Laios is a terrible liar, you’ve prided yourself on plucking his fibs apart in the past, but this is not one of those times.

“You didn’t notice?” you’re lightheaded at his nonchalance, arms coiling around your waist as if to belt your insides right where they are, “You seriously didn’t notice?”

“No,” Laios’ pretty lips tear in a frown, “Should I have?”

He means it literally: are you terribly sad or can we start all over again?

You assume he’s being himself, oblivious and avoidant and so, so, so annoying.

“I’m…” you stumble back, face so hot you’re seconds away from blacking out with terror. Stretching out to steady you, Laios continues to play the kind leader, and it only makes your dinner lurch up your throat. Instinctually, you clasp a hand over your mouth, shaking your head and taking a step back toward the bustling dirt path, “I’m going home.”

“Are you sure? You don’t have to, we can- ”

You shush Laios, memories whacking you over the head every millisecond just to taunt how stupid you were. Indignity blinds you, eyes snapping shut, “I’m going home, Laios.”

Panicked, you stammer a goodbye before lugging yourself away. Laios watches you fade into silhouette, drowning under the clogging crowd by townsquare until not even your head is visible. His fists screw at his sides, knuckles burning white, his feet feel the phantom pummeling of a rush against the ground; urging him forward. That might scare you though, and you already seemed awfully upset, so Laios figures it better to let you sleep off tonight. The two of you can rekindle tomorrow.

Peeking over your shoulder, you spot no broad shoulders or sandy blonde hair looming over the rest of the townsfolk.

Call it melodramatic and frustrating, but you were hoping Laios would follow just to grab your hand and ask you to stay. Not that you should be surprised. More often than not recently, you’d felt a burden on the party. Perhaps Laios is content you’re removing yourself. Perhaps he’ll be relieved you’re no longer pestering him. Perhaps he’ll walk inside and out your feelings to the rest of the party for them to share a laugh over.

(you should know him better than that, but you’re not in your right mind: storming into your room, a teary-eyed mess, to throw your things into bags)

Laios feels a lithe hand dig nails into his arm, he squeals sharply at the sensation and rips back to see Marcille gaping up at him. She throws an arm out toward the dirt road, “What are you doing?!”

Falin gently pries the elf off from Laios before humming thoughtfully at her brother, “They seemed really distraught. What happened?”

“Where’d you two come from?” Laios twists toward the tavern door, “I didn’t hear you at all…”

Flustered at the questioning, Marcille scoffs and drags Laios inside toward their table, “This isn’t about us! Have you never read romance before?! That was terrible!”

“They were upset, they probably wanted space,” Laios reasons, slumping into his seat at the head of the table, “We’ll see them tomorrow, we’ll talk again.”

“What’d you do now?” Chilchuck lifts a bottle of wine to his lips and tosses it back in a way that makes Toshiro cringe.

Namari quirks a brow at the man, waiting until he’s finished gulping to ask, “I thought you hated personal relationships and work?”

“I do, but if he just got rid of our other cleric then we should probably know about it.”

“I didn’t get rid of them!” Laios folds his arms with a sigh, “We’ll sort everything out tomorrow when we’re well-rested.”

Toshiro debates even opening his mouth. Laios is a one-man paradox, somehow well-meaning and belligerent in one breath -- overbearing and entirely hands-off. Laios’ spot in Toshiro’s heart is a complicated one: at this very moment the spot is incredibly tender. Down to that part of a night out where Toshiro empathizes with how clueless the bumpkin is, and it's that part of his brain that chastises him. After all, if it were him and Falin, he would want someone to say something.

“They’re going home,” Toshiro mumbles.

“Huh?” Laios cocks his head at the input, “I know, buddy, she told me she was heading home.”

“No,” be nice, be nice, be nice, be nice, “Home off The Island. No returning to the dungeon.”

“How’d you get all that?” Marcille leans onto the table with both elbows, nervously brushing long flaxen locks behind her ears.

“When we first met, it was something we talked about,” Toshiro confesses, “If they couldn’t marry on The Island, they’d have to take the suitor arranged by their parents back home. This rejection must be the final one.”

With Falin around, he decides to bite back his next statement: I’m not sure why Laios caught their eye in the first place, though.

“Pretty ditzy of you, party leader,” Chilchuck’s jab echoes into the bottle already resettled against his lips.

Laios stands, unsure of why except for the fact he cannot take the news lightly. His heart is racing in protest, one word jamming another in his hurry to speak, until he finally stutters out, “So?”

So, what should I do?

So, why wouldn’t you mention that?

So, why did he let you walk home alone?

“So…” Falin jumps to respond first, settling a massassing hand on Marcille’s shoulder to subdue the fuming woman, “If you want to smooth things over, you should probably go.”

Laios charges from the tavern despite Namari’s scolding that tonight was supposed to be on his tab.

Quickly coming to terms with the fact you’re long gone, Laios heads straight for the inn he and Falin live above. Certain once on that road, the memory of which hostel you’re renting out of will flood back to him.

. . .

You’re jamming bags puffy to the clasp when overzealous knocks threaten to rattle your door from its hinges. The only reason you don’t flee via window to shake the banging madman is because you recognize his voice: Laios, calling your name.

You sigh, forfeiting, “Come in, Laios!”

Despite your own disinterest, you want nothing more than to indulge Laios. It seems that this is something you’ll let devour you.

Flinging the door open and shut behind him, Laios stares at you -- slack jawed and pupils eating away irises. He stares into your face.

“What is it, Lai- “

“We can actually get married!” he blurts, stunning you into utter bewilderment, “You don’t have to take a suitor, you can marry me for real! I don’t care much for inheriting the village, but we can tell your parents I do.”

“Laios…”

“I don’t have much to throw for a wedding, though, so it’ll have to be something quieter than you probably imagined.”

“Laios.”

“Huh?”

“I can’t marry you,” you turn away from his confused pinch, now sweeping a finger along the scratched edge of your nightstand, “You don’t get it.”

“So make me get it,” he says so casually, you almost believe it’s really that easy.

“I can’t marry you because I don’t care about your dad,” he’s struggling to hold in the confused puppy-head-tilt of questioning, you can sense it, “I stopped throwing myself at you for stupid titles a while ago. For a long time I did it genuinely. Because I wanted to.”

“Because you liked me.”

“Now he gets it,” you huff bitterly.

“I can hear you,” Laios steps bravely to be beside you, “Do you still like me?”

You laugh because that’s all you can think to do. The sun just asked a daisy if it enjoys photosynthesis. A rhino wonders if the oxpecker is well fed. A black cat curls around an orange one in a window sill. Weeds grow so tangled up they need to be ripped as a knot. Two moth-gnawed coats hanging in the back of a rich man’s closet. Stars scorching at one another, colliding lightyears ahead. Squiggly stick figures holding hands in a defaced oil painting. Two eagles clawing at one another as they plummet from the sky.

“I don’t know if there’s a plane where I don’t.”

His morbid fascination and tactless enjoyment of life have you in a chokehold, one so fatally unshakable you’re certain he’ll someday kill you. Eventually, he’ll say something so thoughtlessly true to himself, with so much excitement it oozes from his pores, that you’ll have a heart attack then and there.

“So, why not stay?”

One day, he’ll lead you so deep into the dungeon that you cannot escape.

“You know what you’re implying, right?” your voice catches behind chattering teeth, a nervous whisper all you can manage, “I couldn’t, not if you’re just saying this out of guilt.”

“I know what I’m saying, I want you to stay so we can be together,” his face flushes, “I know how selfish it is, but I don’t want you to go home and marry someone else for your family. I want us to marry each other because I like you.”

His abrupt and daring confession has you petrified. Only your jaw is capable of movement, and the most it can do is dumbly drop before you gargle out a stunted, “Okay.”

“Okay!” he excitedly flails out both arms before crushing you against his cuirass, intensely aggressive and deeply endearing at once, “Do I have to meet your parents now?”

“Yes, that’s kind of the reason they let me stay here, you know? To see who I’d find on The Island instead of home.”

“I hate meeting adults… they’re so… weird.”

You choose not to point out that he, as well as everyone he associates with, is an adult.

“Just be yourself,” a sudden, maybe minorly manipulative, plan roars behind your eyes, “You’ll impress them so much, they’ll leave me alone forever!”

Hope

“And since they’re slimes, if you poke their eyes they stay perfectly calm! Which is another good way to tell them from the human they’re mimicking,” your dad made the mistake of asking Laios what he studied, misinterpreting your use of ‘fascinated by nature’ to mean ‘biology scholar’. Laios immediately began ranting and neither of your parents had reawakened from their shock yet, “Succubi can also duplicate people, but that’s usually when taking the most desired form their target has. Which is mainly sex appeal, so for me it’d probably be, well you know!” he affectionately squeezes your hand in view of your parents. You watch a little more of your dad’s soul crumble within his eyes, “The strangest is probably mirror monsters though, since they reflect what they see. They rely on flattery and illusions to swap with humans. I’d love to meet one so I could see their lure techniques in real time.”

“Wow, honey,” you grin, peeking at your parents across the table, “Can you circle back to how the shapeshifters make their copies? I just can’t wrap my head around why they’d use memories instead of the real things!”

“Oh, so it’s actually pretty simple!” Laios devolves into another ramble, eyes alight with excitement.

You’re just as glad to be feeding his need to talk about monsters as you are to be terrifying your parents.

“And you have a village in the North?” your father finally coughs out, holding a hand up to silence Laios.

“It’s my father’s,” Laios glances at you through his peripherals, visibly unsure how to carry out the conversation. To his credit, he’d pestered you about what exactly you wanted him to say about his father, and you only brushed it off as something you’d take care of.

“You’re the eldest, right?” your mom chews her thumbnail nervously, “A son at that!”

“Yes, yes, he’s a firstborn son,” Dad looks to you, “It was in the letter!”

“I am,” Laios’ foot taps beneath the table. Again glancing at you for further prompting.

“We’re not moving from The Island anytime soon,” you return Laios’ previous hand-squeeze, hoping to ease his nerves. You sit up straight, “We want to keep exploring the dungeon.”

“Yes, but after that?” Dad’s eyes are wet with concern and dread, “You’ll have to settle down eventually.”

“We’ll be fine, Dad. I’m fine living like this, I’ve had lots of fun -- I want to keep having fun. I’m excited to marry Laios, and he’s excited to marry me,” to add to your point, Laios nods enthusiastically, “I’m happy marrying for love, and I don’t care what it implies about me as your child.”

Meeting Laios was like striking gold. He’s different from anybody you grew up with, and you’re content to be with him as you continue to grow old.

“If you’re sure,” Mom lays a hand on your father’s back, as if to wrangle a dog before it bites, “Just visit more often, okay?” she catches how Laios perks up at the mention of more traveling, “And bring Laios, too. He’s very… interesting…”

You know. That’s why you courted (suffered) him for actual years.

[hotvintagepoll]

Welcome to the HOT AND VINTAGE MOVIE STARS poll blog! The Hot & Vintage Men Tournament and The Hot & Vintage Movie Women Tournament are now wrapped—congrats to Toshiro Mifune and Eartha Kitt! If you are here for the Dracula Daily polls, those will be posted regularly following the progress of the Substack newsletters.

All polls—including ongoing polls, previous rounds, old tournaments, the various shadow brackets, the Dracula Daily polls, and fun mini polls—can be found in the #hotvintagepoll tag.

FAQs:

"What is the next tournament?" We'll either do the scrungly little guys contest or the Ultimate Hotties tournament.

"When is the next tournament?" Sometime later this summer. I need to take a break, but then I'll be back.

"I want to find my favorite hottie!" Try a tag search for them (ie, use a hashtag in my search bar to find every post I've tagged them in). If you still haven't found your hottie, they either did not fit the criteria of being a movie star from 1910-1970 or they did not make it past the prelims.

“Can I start submitting for the future tournaments? I have guys! I have propaganda!” Please wait for me to post a submission form or otherwise formally announce a tournament before submitting anything.

The views expressed in the propaganda are not my own. I don’t submit my own propaganda, and I don’t change what’s submitted beyond fixing obvious spelling mistakes. If you hate a poll bio or a pic, let me know and send me something I can use instead.

I don’t post or boost negative propaganda about any of the hotties. If you really hate that someone is winning, send me positive propaganda for their hot opponent instead. A lot of these hotties were flawed or problematic in some way—or straight up garbage—but for reasons I go into here, I don't boost anti-propaganda.

If I see repetitive, trolling, and/or bigoted remarks in the comments, I may block you from this bracket. If you want to point out a competitor's problems in the replies, that's fine, but if I see consistent bad-faith trolling or targeted harassment of anyone, you will be blocked.

"Tel me again who won the major tournaments?" Eartha Kitt was crowned the hottest Hot & Vintage Movie Woman, and Toshiro Mifune won the Hot & Vintage Movie Man Tournament.

"Tell me more about this shadow realm?" There is too much lore.

“My FAQ isn’t on here :(” send me an ask! I love hearing from you guys—just please check these basics first.

Tournament schedule post-hiatus:

Ongoing: Dracula Daily casting polls

Possibly next: Scrungly Little Guys contest (gender neutral)

Possibly next: Ultimate Hottie Tournament (top brackets of the hot men & hot women competing together)

TBD: Horror Hotties (Frankensteins, Draculas, Brides, etc.)

TBD: Dandy Detectives (Marples, Sherlocks, Nancy Drews, etc.)

fun mini polls that pit sets of characters from the same movie together, like the Philadelphia Story or Seven Brides for Seven Brothers ones (these can be found in the #minis tag)

Thank you for being here! Enjoy the polls.

[ulquiorrapleasecallmetrash]

Hi hi hi !! Are you fine?? I'm sorry to bother you a bit🥹 i want to request ..

if one day y/n want to break up with bleach men , what bleach men will do? / or what react to her breakup request?

Thank you very very very muchhhh 🫶🏻

Various Bleach Men's reactions To their s/o Breaking Up with them Headcanons

Fandom: Bleach

Rated: G

Warnings: None!

Admin Wisteria: I hope you enjoy!

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Byakuya Kuchiki:

-He will be heartbroken, not going to lie. 

-He is a type of guy that loves so you passionately. 

-So when you told him how you feel all he could do is give you a sad look. 

-He won’t say anything to you for a few moments then he will give you small but sad smile. 

-”I..understand…I still love you but as long as you happy that’s all that matters…” 

-He won’t beg or plead because he knows that would be selfish thing to do. 

-Instead he will somberly but gracefully let you go. 

-It’s gentle yet sad, like letting a tiny bird or butterfly free.

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Sosuke Aizen:

-Doesn’t say anything at first. 

-Has a frown on his face but nods. 

-He won’t show how upset he is about you breaking up with him. 

-Will pretend that he doesn’t care but in actuality he secretly does care. 

-”If that’s what you want then fine….”

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Ichigo Kurosaki:

-He heart is shattered.

-Will give you a heart broken hearted frown but doesn’t want to make you feel worse so he will smile, hiding how much he feels. 

-”No, that’s okay…whatever makes you happy…” 

-You can tell just by his voice that it isn’t okay…

It’s sad but he just wants to see you happy.

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Toshiro Hitsugaya:

-He is heartbroken, but will not show it. 

-Will give you a sad smile. 

-”That’s okay….” 

-He is very quiet. 

-You can tell by the look on his face that he is upset. 

-But he just wants to see you happy.

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Kenpachi Zaraki:

-He is angry…

-Will make a face trying to hide his anger. 

-But he is failing miserbly.

-Because he feels bad for being mad at you…

-He wants you to be happy because he still loves you but can’t help but be feel at least a little bit angry, heart broken and irritated.

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Ulquiorra Cifer:

-Clearly, he isn’t happy. 

-But he also doesn’t express it. 

-”Fine, then leave.”

-There is venom in his face, He was clearly angry.

-But he isn’t going to to out right express it. 

-So being mean and dismissive is the only way for him to cope.

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Grimmjow Jaegerjaques:

-Clearly angry but is trying to control his anger. 

-He is just heart broken but doesn't know how to express in a healthy way. 

-”I don’t need you anyways! Leave and leave and never come back.”

-Fists clench, teeth gritted and everything. 

-At least he didn’t kill you.

[astronomical-bagel]

yo mutual i love ur tags fr because like u took the words right of my mouth i was so baffled how ppl would side with one more than the other because the autism pvp felt so real to me that i related to Both of them rlly a lot like. So much so it has cemented itself as rlly one of my fave scenes ever because it was a Step up for growth like that fight made them both better people . and it makes me mad ppl belittle toshiros experiences and like ignore his autism for the sake of pitting two bad bitches against each other Good Lord. The Nuance. There is Nuance. and ppl who ignore it just feels so personal to me as an autistic asian person who's been told that there's no way they're not "normal" like ive not been masking and not even like That well either.

Toshiro to me is like a similar vibe of Autism to Mob aka Shigeo Kageyama MP100 where he represses so much of his true feelings and opinions and emotions that he will just blow up one day (validly!!!) !!! like. let him be autistic in peace. not everything has to be a moral failure and not everything has to revolve around Laios just because hes the main character of Dunmeshi. Like they were both so relatable it hurts me...

not me spelling empathized as emphasized lmao

but yeah anyways I really interpret the shuro and laios conflict as just two autistic people who just don’t mesh naturally? At the very least, it’s a complication between two people with very different cultures.

Both laios and toshiro are people who don’t exactly fit in. On shuro’s side, the source of his ‘otherness’ is a little redirected (is that the word?) because his status and nationality already set him apart on the island, but even back home he was reserved and didn’t socialize well. He struggles to connect with others and has a hard time being sincere!!! the argument between him and laios isn’t an evil neurotypical vs blorbo autistic, it’s conflict-avoidant autistic vs social cue blind autistic!

There isn’t really a right or wrong side here, Shuro tried communicating in the way he knew how, but he and laios just simply don’t understand each other’s languages. Their fight is a reset for the both of them; now they each know a vital fact about each other! Laios knows that Shuro has a hard time verbalizing discomfort, and shuro now knows that Laios needs to be told things to understand them. Now they can both find a middle ground and properly compromise between their two opposites.

and it’s important to note that if laios did know he was making shuro uncomfortable, he would stop as best as he knew how, all the way. This guy takes boundaries seriously, as long as there are clear lines to what those boundaries are. And he’s attentive to other’s needs! (See: him and chilchucks friendship. They understand each other very well, I could write a whole meta on it)

Now that he and shuro are seeing eye to eye, their friendship can now progress in a healthier fashion! This fight isn’t the end of the world. (Honestly having a fist fight is like third base to me but we won’t speak of that) Toshiro isn’t evil, he’s just a really cool foil to Laios, and their disagreement serves to establish important parts of their characters and to progress both their character arcs 👍

[sniperduel]

Lots of people talking about the micro aggressions Shuro experienced in Laois’s party but I haven’t seen anybody talk about how he only suffered through those because he had a crush on Falin, Laois’s sister. Marcille is also in Laois’s party mostly because of Falin, and yet she has not gotten into a fist-fight with Laois about any of the things that have bothered her. Marcille actually communicates with Laois very directly about the things she wants, thinks, and dislikes. Marcille isn’t even as upset as Chilchuck when she finds out Laois was being Laois and spilled the beans about the ancient magic. This is something that impacts Marcille so much more than Laois being an annoyance in regards to Shuro’s crush on Falin.

The fact that Shuro thought he could continue to pursue Falin without trying to understand or communicate better with Laois doesn’t make me feel good about his presence in the party at least. I’m not saying he’s an awful and bad guy, what I’m saying is that Shuro had an inherent disrespect toward Falin that he wasn’t addressing because “ooooh cute girl” but he literally hated her brother, whom she is remarkably close to.

Of course, the situation is resolved, but this situation was much more nuanced than “Laois is autistic” and “Toshiro experienced racism”. Falin is a key aspect of their dynamic and Laois still doesn’t get how he was disrespected so much because Shuro couldn’t be near Falin without also dealing with Laois, so he essentially pretended to be Laois’s friend. It’s just icky. You can’t hope to marry somebody and then suffer through a horrible relationship with your spouse’s family; Falin isn’t just going to leave Laois (and the dungeon for that matter) and go to the Eastern archipelago.

[loriache]

V + L for the ask game c:

c:

ask game

V: Which character do you relate to most?

In Dunmeshi… There are parts of many different characters I relate to. Marcille’s high-strung, high-achiever, prissy nature is relatable (as a very small kid I would get upset when painting or playing in the garden because I got paint or dirt under my nails). I find Kabru’s focus on overthinking about the Morally Right Thing to do in every situation relatable - and find his decisiveness admirable. I relate to Laios’ difficulty in social situations, Falin’s Weird Creature Status at her school, and her tendency to self-efface and deny her own agency. In the Laios/Shuro fight I’ve been the person who was doing the wrong thing without realising, but I’ve also been the person feeling paralysingly anxious about being in public with someone who is being too weird or rude or Not Masking Well Enough or whatever. So I relate to Toshiro there too!

I suppose part of what makes this manga compelling is how grounded many of the characters feel. So I can see myself in many of the characters, particularly the main characters, very easily.

L: Say something genuinely nice about a character who isn’t one of your faves

I don’t have many characters I dislike, to be honest - so let’s say, Delgal. His treatment of Thistle was unfair & their codependency was inflected in his favour by class and race and Thistle was never able to truly reckon with how bad that relationship was for him. It makes me so sad, and it does make me mad at Delgal! Piece of Shit King!

Ok now that I’ve said why I don’t like him… time to say something genuinely nice. ….

I have a hard time imagining how he could have had a better relationship with Thistle than he did, in the circumstances they were in. Don’t get me wrong, it was terrible - but it was never not going to be. If they didn’t buy Thistle, it’s because they got him for free; he was never ever an equal or even an equally full person to Delgal, and being raised in the way Delgal was, I don’t see how he could have recognised that as wrong without recognising his whole life, his identity, and the foundation of his role in his society as wrong. They didn’t have a chance.

No, that’s not… nice. Let me try again. There’s something beautiful about the way his power over his people and over Thistle ultimately trapped him in a symbolic role, denying any agency or real meaningful power. The king is the guy whose soldiers will come and beat you up if you don’t give him some of your harvest - that’s a big part of what administration of large regions entails! But what does that mean when you don’t need to eat? Without the threat of death, all power is ultimately symbolic, except Thistle’s - who is the only one with any real power anymore. There might be carvings all over the dungeon praising Delgal, but that means nothing! By asking Thistle to save him from death, he ultimately gave up the foundation of his power, which was the threat of force. Isn’t that great?

Also… not really nice, huh. Well. I think it was cute that he came up with the idea of Thistle trying foods from his homeland : ) That’s a genuinely nice gesture! And he wouldn’t have had Laios beaten for being in the way at his wedding feast. Not the worst type of guy that he could’ve been.

ask game

Thank you for playing Ask Game with me : ) you picked good questions!

[juniepops]

I don’t think the anime’s revealed it yet so I’ll forgive it but it’s really funny to have people breaking down how Shuro isn’t truly a bad guy and how his ethnic background ties into the way he and Laios interact but calling him Shuro the whole time. They don’t know Laios calls him that because he misheard Toshiro and never got properly corrected……. It’s another piece of understanding that dynamic

[animeloverskylarmoon]

Byakuya Kuchiki (Bleach) - Oneshot

Logic has always been your way of operating. 

That’s why when you became a reaper and people assumed you were a guy you never corrected them. It was exhausting always trying to justify to them because at first glance it would seem like a lie. You preferred ease, and it would be a hassle. It’s not like you were really bothered because you and the other kids basically grew up on the streets, so you had no one to impress. The head captain knew so that was enough.

Logic. 

It didn’t really explain your current situation. The gash on your stomach and the six reapers unconscious on the ground spoke for itself. You’d run into a little hollow activity.

Logically you should have ran off, went for help, but that monster was cutting down your comrades and you sort of reacted. You’d gotten just one of them. This last one was proving to be a bit more of a challenge.

“Show yourself.”

You gripped your sword, closing your eyes as you did your best to concentrate. It assumed it was at an advantage because you’re injured. Maybe that’s what gave you the upper hand, because when it appeared right before you, you just lifted your blade and it went right into its jaw, through the skull. The shrill cry followed after and in a matter of seconds there was no trace of it.

You grunted, holding your side as you rammed your sword into the ground to keep your body upright. The bodies around you were down, but still breathing. You just needed to make it back, get help. With a shaky breath, you tried to stand, but your stance was unsteady. All you did was lift your head and your eyes widened as you coughed up a mouthful of blood. You gave in, closing your eyes. You fully expected your body to hit the dirt, but when your eyes opened, whatever you were leaned against felt firm.

Softer than the ground, but steady.

Looking up, your eyes tracked the familiar white cloak.

“Tai..cho..”

It was a captain, it had to be. You aren’t sure if it’s Komamura, but you’re thankful nonetheless.

You could rest.

~

“All the patients are recovering. We have (L/N)-san to thank for that.” Unohana states.

The captains were lined up, giving a briefing on the incident. There were a few injured, but nothing detrimental. Something they could all be thankful for.

“It was lucky that you made it there when you did Kuchiki-taicho.” Unoahan’s words simply earned a nod from the other captains.

“Given the extent of those injuries and the situation it’s understandable that all of them were tended to. But why did you separate (L/N)-san, were those injuries more extensive than the others?” Toshiro’s question had a few of them wondering the same. For a second she assumes it’s a joke, but the general curious expressions alerts her that isn’t the case. Unohana places her hand next to her lips laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Shinji inquires.

“(L/N)-san is a woman, it would be improper to treat her with the men. Especially with how bad the injuries were.” Byakuya is the one who answers and Shinji gapes, along with the rest of the captains.

“SHE’S A GIRL!!” The simultaneous response comes.

Komamura nods.

“I was under the impression that everyone knew. “ He speaks casually.

“How the hell would we know that!! I’ve been addressing her wrong for years. Why didn’t she correct me!!” Shinji reasons.

“She’s very laid back when it comes to that topic. She prefers to avoid the hassle of explaining herself.”

“That’s a shitty excuse!!” Shinji continues to complain.

Unohana is still smiling, and Yamamoto hides a smile of his own.

The rest of the week drags along, uneventful.

You’d pretty much healed in the span of two days heading to visit some of the others who’d been hurt. Smiles and laughter were exchanged among the group of you. They were grateful, and so were you. That’s why as you were heading back that evening you’d decided to stop at the sixth squad barracks. It takes a while to get to the captain's office. Knocking on the door, you wait for the invitation.

“Come in.”

You slide the door open, stepping in as you bow.

“Kuchiki-taicho.”

Lifting your head, you offer a smile of gratitude.

“I wanted to thank you for helping me and some of the others during that attack. I’m grateful.”

He hasn’t had many encounters with you, but he’s gained an understanding of your personality. So he expected the visit.

“It is my duty as a captain to protect.”

“Yes, of course. Thank you again.”

His eyes stay planted on your form.

“Why did you never correct them?”

For a moment you’re confused, but then you remember what your captain had told you, and you can’t help but laugh softly.

“I never saw the need for it, Kuchiki-taicho. I’m used to the misunderstanding. So it’s expected that they would have a hard time differentiating. I’m a bit lacking in the feminine department.” You joke.

“You’re beautiful.”

If you expect anything, it isn’t that statement.

For a moment you just stare, and then the color begins to crawl up your face. You can’t believe he just said that, better yet he’s wearing such a stoic expression after delivering such a sweet compliment.

Flustered, you start stammering. You’re not sure words are even coming out of your mouth at that point.

When you finally gather yourself, you bow one last time, excusing yourself as you offer some more thanks. The second you’re outside, you jump into the air in hopes that the wind will get rid of any heat in your cheeks.

It doesn’t help a bit.

You’re a mess.

[troius]

Ichigo’s whole complex is born out of the idea that he has to be independent and strong, that he wasn’t strong enough to save his mother, that he has to be that person for everybody, but it’s a wildly self-centered way of thinking about the world.

He’s saying this to Renji Abarai. You know, the guy nominally in charge of everybody who got hurt? The guy who was helped out of his own bad place by Ikkaku, and whose authority has been respected by Toshiro on this mission despite Toshiro outranking him. The guy who Ichigo knows damn well loves Rukia more than he loves himself. If anybody has “failed” here, it’s Renji-- but Renji knows that this is a qualified success. Five Arrancars are dead. Zero Soul Reapers, or their Karakura allies, lost their lives.

“If you’re alive, then you’ve won.” But Ichigo can’t see it that way, because he’s still stuck in his head-- consumed by the idea that if he can’t control everything, be so powerful that he will be able to stop the ones he loves from being hurt, then he’s somehow a failure.

This isn’t going to end well.

[magical-girl-coral]

Looking back on the SS arc, I realize that one of the biggest hits Aizen is the main bad guy is how, unlike everyone else, Kubo never showed him having any flashbacks to past relationships. Which is a pretty big hint once you notice how the Gotei 13 was so intermingled with each other that it's pretty impossible for that to happen.

Don't believe me? Let's take an example of how connected everyone was at that point: Gin saves Rangiku when they are children -> Rangiku and Toshiro lead together the tenth as lieutenant and captain -> Toshiro and Momo are childhood friends -> Momo, Renji, and Izuru were in the same class during the academy -> Gin and Izuru lead together the third as lieutenant and captain, and so on.

You can literally pick any character you want within the Gotei 13 and somehow it will all come back at full circle. All captains and lieutenants (along with some seated officers) are connected through romantic, platonic, or familiar ways.

But Aizen? Aizen isn't shown to have any kind of relations outside the one he had with Momo. The only other character who didn't show any connections outside the workforce is Unohana, but you can excuse that with Kubo not wanting to spoiler the first Kenpachi twist.

Aizen's detachment to the Seireitei was hinted at throughout the arc with more and more attachments being revealed on each page. He was literally the only character who didn't have anyone to lose and that is a pretty red flag if I've ever seen one.

In other words, Kubo's writing is fucking brilliant and I will not shut up about it until I'm six feet under.

[mrskurono]

Schweiden Sex Education || Wakatoshi Ushijima x Fem!Reader

Tag(s): oral, semi public, slight age gap, talk of taking virginity, dirty talk

Character(s): Wakatoshi Ushijima (hq), with mentions of other Schweiden members  

Word Count: 4k

a/n: I intend to make this a mini series so here’s to keeping one thirsty brain cell (:

part (2) (3)

The Schweiden team had always felt like a home to you. Really it was your home. And had been for the past six, almost seven, years now. The only ones who held supremacy over you were Nicollas and Fukuro. And that was a tenuous supremacy when you argued you did more work than they did to help manage the team. Mostly the veteran men didn’t argue with you.

And surprisingly neither did the newbies as they came in one by one. Each year adding another body to your roster and another mouth to listen to. Quickly though the Schweiden players always seemed to get the hint who was the mother hen of the eagle roost. Even the obstinate youngsters the team got within the last few years realized that. 

Korai perhaps your hardest to twin. Like a true middle child. He raised hell when he could but learned fast you had no time for games. The other two though? The one to come after him was sullen but determined. You honestly appreciated the break Tobio gave you in comparison to Korai. But the older of the three newest recruits? He left you stumped.

Wakatoshi Ushijima. Or as Tobio and Korai repeatedly said, Ushiwaka. Came first. He was quiet and good at what he does. An obvious pick for the team. Like all your players you wanted to cultivate a good relationship with him. If your boys were happy then they played happy.

But unlike Toshiro who you could call if he was gonna have a bad day by the way he left his equipment in the Schweiden’s gym instead of the lockers. Or Fukuro who almost never had a bad day if there was a pack of spearmint gum set on the bench right inside the men’s locker room. Your newest eaglet was something of a mystery.

The first season you had him under your care was ruthless. He wouldn’t speak but maybe two words to you. And that was in one week. When you tried to make him feel more at home the man would look at you with a dumbfounded look and tell you his home was back in Japan. These gestures seemed to go right over his head.

Korai came along the following season and with another younger player you thought maybe Ushijima would warm up to you. That was a false hope as most of the season was spent rangling Korai for better or worse.

It wasn’t until the youngest Schweiden came that you finally had some insight to the stoic man. Tobio had off handed comments about their matches back in high school. Specifically his first year as he would repeatedly tell you that his team got to go to nationals that year and not his. This didn’t help you a lot but the other things he and Korai drug out of him did.

Soon you tried using Ushiwaka instead of anything else. Tobio and Korai insisted maybe he felt to formal around his manager. It would illicit a response of him looking at you. Just to quickly look away. Then it was anticipating things he might need. Extra towels, clean jerseys for practice, even snacks here and there for long practices. All of it met with him staring at you from either a distance. Or avoiding eye contact with you the second you were within arms reach of him. 

Concerned he might hate you. You tried harder to win your player over. A happy player was a happy win.

“Ushiwaka-kun!” Again this week you flag him down as he enters the gymnasim with Tobio. In your hands are the water bottles you always keep filled for the men even if they bring their own, “And Tobio-kun how are you guys today?”

Like normal Tobio yawned, regardless of the fact it was two in the afternoon, “Fine I guess. Where’s Hoshiumi senpai?”

“Went to go get something for Fukuro apparently it wasn’t clear,” You had a good idea of what a normal Tuesday looked like for your men, “Do you want me to get Toshiro to practice with you two today?”

“Sure,” Tobio thanked you.

But it was Ushiwaka’s scowl that still you wanted to prevent. So of course you offered him a bottle, “I got the electrolyte power you like Ushiwaka-kun.”

Staring hard down at you. It takes you a moment to realize he isn’t staring at the white sports bottle. And indeed staring at you. Ready to open your mouth and ask what the problem was, Tobio nudges him in the side. Korai was seen coming back in from the other end of the gym with Toshiro. Meaning whatever kinship you were trying to cultivate was cut short by the men going to business with practice. Once again foiled in trying to make all your players happy. You sigh and go about the rest of practice helping where you can.

Throughout the practice though something seemed off. Every time you turned around you found Ushiwaka’s eyes on you. No matter where you were in the gym. Be it picking up volleyballs. Or bent over refilling bottles. His gaze followed you from a distance. Having not realized this much until you had unbutton the first few buttons of your shirt to let yourself breath.

Pulling away the fabric from your neck and collar to fan yourself a little. This was when you saw Ushiwaka's face nearly boring holes into you. First you thought he wanted something. But the second you went to go grab a water for him, the six three brute of a man turned away quickly. Stumping you once again for what he was looking at you for.

A second time that day, towards the end of practice, did your attention get peaked once more. You were standing around the men with clipboard in hand. Arms folded up under your bust and waiting for Fukuro and Nicollas to finish their spiel. That your gaze found Ushiwaka's gaze indiscriminately locked onto your chest.

Sure the team members were all taller than you but almost none of them looked at you like that. Even Korai who you always kept an eye on just because he ran his mouth so often. So when it was Ushiwaka's olive green eyes entranced by the dip in your shirt, you had to do a double take to make sure he was really staring at you.

Holding still you forget to listen to what is going on around you. Just staying still, breath caught in your chest as you wonder how long he’s going to stare at you. Unsure if he’s even noticed you watching him. 

Soon there is a heat creeping up on your cheeks. The objectification almost a turn on. You wonder if he’s tried to look down your shirt before. Has he looked at you wearing shorts? Did he notice the one time you wore your leggings with the hole in the crotch? Each daunting thought made your insides twist with giddiness before that was ripped from you the second your eyes met his. 

Like every time before, Ushiwaka looked away. Scowl on his face and refusing your eye contact. Even if he was just staring down your shirt he didn’t decide to keep looking at you for long. You thoughts a buzz as Fukuro called the meeting over and now you had something else to think about.

Thoughts stirred in you from that moment. Perhaps you were trying to get his attention in the wrong way. Practices and meetings didn’t change. But the way you presented yourself did. Keeping blouses unbutton lower. Tucking things up high with the threat of midriff always lurking. You took full advantage of showing yourself off with little comment from the older players. For as far as they were concerned was you were seeing someone outside work. It wasn’t knew for you to spruce up when you had a suitor. There was no suitor but there was someone who had noticed your change in attire.

“Pay attention!!” Korai raged about the third ball that went right by Ushiwaka’s head. This was getting worse by the day and Korai’s fuse was getting shorter. 

“What? I was.” Ushiwaka frowned at his teammate like he was lying.

“Huh?? Really?? Paying attention??” Korai bolstered his chest at his fellow volleyball player, “Three balls what am I your ball boy??”

“No we have one of those.” Tobio interjected. Little to care about Korai getting bent out of shape but he did think it was ridiculous to hear that they didn’t have one.

“Ehh??? I know that!” Korai huffed as he chucked at ball Ushiwaka’s face, “I’m tired of this idiot sucking at practice!”

You overheard the Schweiden youngerster arguing so you look up from your paperwork actually not aware of anything. Practice was almost over so what Korai was getting bent out of shape over confused you and the rest of the team.

“I hit every serve.” Ushiwaka informed the shorter wing spiker like there was no validity to his accusations.

Korai made to mock him childishly and rolled his eyes before looking over at you for some reason, “If he wasn’t thinking about fucking you all the time then we could get something done!”

“Alright!” Fukuro clapped loudly like that was cover up what his teammate decided to blurt out, “I think we’re done for today!”

More than stunned you look behind you like Korai might have been meaning someone else. Even if you were showing a little more skin this past week you still thought it was a joke.

“He’s all pissy because he’s a virgin-” Korai started up again but Nicollas decided he’d put his foot down too to help Fukuro out. 

“Wait and your not?” Tobio looked genuinely surprised at the white haired man.

“What?! No I’m not what kinda question is-”

“Clean up! Or laps now!” Fukuro hollered.

Fukuro’s laps were hell. 

Stunned by that entire transaction right in front of you. It takes a moment before you really even register what Korai said. But it’s then that your eyes dart right over to Ushiwaka. He’s still a virgin? You couldn’t tell it Korai was being a shit or maybe, there was some validity to that?

Sure your cleavage was slightly self indulgent to make yourself feel good. But knowing that you had become a possible fixation was....almost hot?

Now it was your turn to not take your eyes off your teams wing spiker. Had a normal person been called out like that then they would be a mess or at least red with embarrassment. Ushiwaka seemed, unphased. While they cleaned up and didn’t earn actual laps. You hung back with the dwindling fact that Korai told the truth and wasn’t just trying to start something for being crabby.

Having taken too much time after the little outburst. You ended being one of the last people to leave the gym. Nicollas and Toshiro waved you good night. With a small apology for earlier. You laughed it off and chucked it up to Korai being himself. When you turned around though you saw one of your members was still practicing sole. Ushiwaka.

Clipboard hugged to your chest you watch him for a second. Still no illicit response for what happened earlier. Was he just staring at you because he didn’t like you?

No answer as he looks at you once. But then drops his volleyball in the bin to disappear back into the locker room. You guessed you should probably head home now. Only to be stopped with a wicked idea surfacing in your mind.

You could just ask? Where was the harm in asking?

Setting your things back down you make your way back to the men’s locker room. Vacant now so you knew no one was back there but the wing spiker. 

Searching the locker room you spot the younger man over by his locker. Of course getting his things. Maybe things really were in your head and Korai was talking out his ass. But when you watched him peel off his jersey your lady brain had other ideas.

It had been a while since you’d gotten any. Passing into your late twenties did that as did travel and working with a team of constantly sweaty men. So the last time you might have actually seen action was more than a few months. 

Your grip on the edge of the lockers you leaned into tightened. He was, god he was delicious to look at. An impulse and you push away from the locker.

“Ushiwaka-kun!” You hail him but before he can register the intruder in the locker room, you have yourself pushed up against him. Looking up at him with the perfect view down your blouse, “...is what Korai-kun said true?”

For the first time, in almost three years, the glimmer of a response shown on the man’s face. It was subtle. And you would have missed it had you not been watching him so closely. But the way his adam’s apple bobbed up and down in the most guilty swallow of a man’s life. Korai was right.

Fueled by the temptation of untouched skin. You push yourself up on the man’s lips without question. Knowing full well that no one besides you had touched them. Kissing a virgin never in a million years had you thought it would turn you on like this,

Almost entirely one sided. Not for the sake of the feeling of Ushiwaka lean his tall frame into the kiss. He purely did not know what to do when your lips met his. Stunned by the fact he’d stared at them for countless hours with lewd thoughts always surfacing. Now that it was actually happening though the volleyball savant had no idea what to do. 

Pulling away with a lingering touch on his chest. You realize just the bridge of his nose has gotten a dusting of blush on it. He really had no way to word anything. Perhaps Korai’s loud mouth was the best thing to happen to either of you.

“Let me,” You whisper like someone is going to hear you in the vacant locker room, “Let me show you.”

His thick brows pinch in the middle and he’s left wondering what you want to show him, “What can I see?”

Your heart jumps into your throat. He had no idea and here he was going to take a hasty kiss as enough. You weren’t though after the years of misunderstanding. Now you found a language you could talk to him in.

“Let me show you, what to do,” You look at the hand pressed against his chest. The toned muscles underneath as wonderful to touch as you imagined. Licking your lips you struggle to keep your composure as the need to be the role model came before all else, “Let me teach you about sex and....I’ll guarantee you’ll be the best at it. Promise.”

Nothing but humming taking over any thoughts he had. Just like every time he caught a glimpse down his manager’s shirt. It was the same body tingling hum Ushiwaka got from that as well. Without an idea what to do or say it was Korai’s brash words that came to mind. He told him to always say yes to a lady if she mentioned sex. And looking down at you. The fact sex and the dip in your shirt were right there in front of him. Ushiwaka understood he had to say yes.

“Yes.” He found his eyes locked in on your clevage again. This time it was hard not to be when you pressed your body up against him, “...Yes please.”

Goosebumps prickled over every inch of you. The way your loins aches was unreal. You hadn’t been this giddy and horny since you were a teenager. Quickly to seal the deal you meet his mouth again. This time taking it a bit slower. Until you put your arms up around the back of his neck and pulled him into you, “...lesson one, kissing.” You brush your lips against his and hum, “Kiss me back and follow my lead.”

That was hard. First it was just him pressing harder into your lips than you were into his. When your lips parted though and your tongue grazed his bottom lip is when Ushiwaka dialed it back to truly let you take the lead.

With the sweet taste of his lips on your own. Wrestling for dominance over the kiss was nothing. Seconds in and you had your tongue exploring every inch of your mouth as he at least got the hint to bring his hands up to your sides. Not much but it was something. Ushiwaka was at least trying to take more in the sloppy kiss than he had when you first kissed him.

Finally when you pull back for a breath. It’s more than obvious the tent in his jersey shorts. If his untouched lips tasted this good. Could the rest of him be as delicious.

“Sometimes....” You started slowly, drawing a hand down his neck and peppering his collar bone with kisses, “We use our mouths to kiss more than just lips.”

“Like necks?” Ushiwaka, though holding a steady tone still, was gripping your sides even harder. Outwardly he wouldn’t let on but his body was reacting magically to your touch.

“Necks...” You murmur against his and trail down, “Chests...Stomachs....Private areas.”

Pushing him to sit. Perhaps a smart choice if he’s never experienced it before. You kneel between the wing spiker’s legs. Bringing yourself close to his clothed cock as it stood at attention for you and only you. Of course you lick your lips.

Untouched. Unsoiled. All for you to taste.

Your palms rub against his thighs. Finally the first normal sign he was enjoying himself as Ushiwaka’s moan was dampened by the fight to keep it down. His eyes shut tight and chest heaving a little. You smile as you bring your face close to his groin, “Don’t keep it in....that’s the part of the fun.”

This was true in fact when your lips pressed to the clothed underside of his cock. A deep throaty groan leaving the man. You could smell his precum through his shorts. At this rate you knew to thread carefully less he blow the second your fingers encircled him. And desperately did you wanna taste that cum.

Careful to free his cock from his shorts. You take a moment to not believe this man is a virgin with the length he is packing. Long, girthy, and a sight to be hold. Your mouth begins watering not just at the idea of him being untouched. But at the beautiful cock before you.

“I’m going to touch you....so I can get it in my mouth,” You don’t lie about the showing him thing. Deliberate in your movements. Hands touching up his thick thighs. Until finally the moment of truth. Your fingers curling around his base as Ushiwaka groaned unable to stay quite like he hoped.

The wonderful musk of his precum. And the sight of him nearly shaking in his seat. You could feel your slick coating your cunt lips and threatening to really ruin your panties. Patience was needed though. If you were going to teach him properly.

“Do you wanna look at my tits while I suck you off?” You offer. Eyes shut but he had spent so long staring at them you couldn’t keep them clothed.

Ushiwaka’s green eyes open, contrasting the red tint to his face, and he looks down at your chest so close to his cock, “...yes, yes I would.”

Wasting no time you let go of him just to peel your top off. A reward for him like the blowjob you were about to give him wasn’t enough.

You press your breasts into his thighs. The warmth of your chest sending a shiver up the man’s spine. Nothing compared to the way your hand felt gripping his cock though. Not the slightest idea how delightful his cock was either. So when you finally made a glutton of yourself and swallowed only about two thirds of his cock up. Well, Ushiwaka thought that was just a moment of heaven on earth.

The warmth of your cheeks wet and velvety. Enveloping his cock like nothing his hand could do. Even in his wildest ideas he never  conjured up the idea this is what it would feel like. It was near too much.

You cheeks hallow as you struggle to take all of him. Desperate though. You press more into your mouth as your tongue works over time. Loving the sight as his head tips back and lips part slightly. Finally something you could read from him.

Eager to taste more you bob your head up and down on his cock. Sucking like your life depended on it. His precum soiling your tongue just as your juices seeped into your panties. Even the tingle of your tits pressed to his thighs was turning you on. Seeing him above you, gripping the edge of the bench and heated expression ruining that stoic look. It certainly was something you could get use to.

But no for long. Maybe not even five minutes in and you felt the jerking twitch of his cock. Faster than even you anticipated. It didn’t keep you from pulling your lips off his cock. Instead you wanted it more.

Eyes locked up on his face. Lips slurping what of him you could while your hand moved with you to jerk him off. Ushiwaka had no idea what to do with his hands or what to even say. The way you looked at him left him frozen as the undeniable need to cum finally was too much. 

Warm spurts of cum filled your mouth. Before you were ready so some of the precious treat leaked from your cheeks. A choke and a sputter when you couldn’t keep up with the cum load he was giving you. Almost missing the guttural, almost whiny, moan that left the man above you. Face twisted in pleasure. It drove you to suck him dry of all that cum he was feeding you in his pathetic excuse for stamina. He really was a virgin.

Finally with the taste of his cum on your lips as you cleaned his cock off for every last drop. You look up at the mess of a man and smile. Certainly the most relaxed you’ve ever seen him in two years. You find it easy to believe he wasn’t going to back out of this sex education arrangement now.

Making your way back up his chest. Hands drawing up his toned muscles until you were at eye level with him. You gently press your lips against his. Not too much. Not ready to overwhelm him with the taste of his own cum. But enough that he does figure to lean into you and wrap his arms around the exact spot he did before.

“Do you want me to teach you?” You mumble against his lips.

That same swallow from before. Now though he was a little dazed looking at you as the warmth of your skin was something entirely new, “Yes.”

The want in his voice makes you grin, “What do you want me to teach you?”

“Everything. I want you to teach me everything.”

[shadowsnlace]

Joining in for the daughter prompt: Captains taking care of their little girl when she gets sick with the flu?

Short and sweet :) Here we go....

Shunsui - Hates to see his little petal sick to the point that he becomes an anxious mess. Hanataro is summoned every time she sneezes, barfs, has a fever spike, or has diarrhea. However, Shunsui is the best when it comes to comforting her, taking naps with her, and making her feel better with stories and games. Enjoys checking her temperature with forehead kisses.

Soi Fon - The first sign of illness her daughter is sped to the 4th for care. Armed with medication and instructions, she follows it all to the letter. While she’s not very good at comforting her little girl, she does try. It’s Aunty Yoruichi that takes on the role of cheerer-upper and is able to get Soi Fon to relax. Although, Yoruichi is also armed with embarrassing tales that make Soi Fon blush and her daughter giggle.

Rose - Needs help with the sicky bits -- lots of help. The second he hears anyone puke, he’s running for a toilet or sink to join in. Taking care of her physically isn’t a problem, aside from the sympathetic retching. Comforting her is where he shines with soft songs and soft music.

Unohana - No trouble at all, she’s used to dealing with illnesses. She knows exactly what to do. Her daughter will have the best of care and the gentle side of her mom to see her through the flu. Retsu reading books to her and doing quiet activities help her little girl pass the time when she’s awake.

Shinji - The first sign of the flu and he is sending for someone from the 4th. He becomes a one-man nursing phenomenon. If she barfs, he’s right behind her to clean her up then disinfect the bathroom. If she sneezes, clean and disinfect. Fever, cool cloths and fresh sheets after ever break in the fever. In his mind, he’s actively removing the illness from her and the house. All the while, he’s making her laugh with jokes, stories, and silly songs. 

Byakuya - Private doctor to diagnose and prescribe medication. Private nurse to handle all the ick and be the bad guy doling out the medicine. Byakuya completely focuses on the the comfort of his little girl. He’s got a bit of PTSD when it comes to illness so getting him to leave her side is nearly impossible. Stories about Ambassador Seaweed are told, coloring books and other artistic activities are done, and there are many words of comfort, snuggles, and the soft side of her Daddy. 

Sajin - He is very anxious at first when his little girl gets sick. Once someone from the 4th tells him what to do and gives him medicine then he’ll calm down. He’s very good at taking care of her. The smells are a bit overwhelming, but he adjusts because his daughter needs him. Sajin stays with her throughout it all keeping her entertained and well cared for.

Lisa - Is amazed how much puke and poop can be generated by the flu. She follows the 4th instructions to the letter, going so far as to hang it on the fridge. Has a bit of trouble making herself give her daughter medicine that tastes so nasty because it seems to be adding insult to injury. Excels at comforting her little girl with stories, books, and games. 

Kensei - How dare this germ invade his little girl’s body! He’s upset but hides it from her well. Armed with medicine and instructions from the 4th he sets to work on a schedule for medication, meals, and fluid intake. When she barfs, he’s right there steadying her and cleaning up. He’s much like Shinji when it comes to keeping her and the home clean. “Don’t worry, you’re gonna get better!” is heard often, almost too often. Stories and games don’t dawn on him until she asks for them.

Toshiro - Like Kensei, he’s upset. Toshiro has trouble keeping that out of his facial expressions and has to adjust when his daughter asks what’s wrong with him. Once he has medicine and instructions from the 4th, he sees to all her care himself. Comforting her is something he has to practice and he gets better with each try. Reading books to her is easier for him than playing games, which he views as childish and still pushes a button in him. Thanks to the nature of his zanpakto, he’s able to provide cooling relief whenever her fever spikes. 

Kenpachi - Wishes he were sick instead of her. Gets detailed info from the 4th on the illness and the medicine. Has Ikkaku and Yumichika running errands for whatever she wants; he completely caters to her every whim. Kenny spends the worst of it carrying her back and forth from the bed to the bathroom as needed. He cleans her up and sees to her comfort with a gentleness at odds with his often rough manner. Tells her all about his battles and the hollows he’s defeated while stroking her hair and lacing in some assurances that she will get better.

Mayuri - Flu going around, you say? Forget it, his daughter isn’t going to get it because he’ll gather plenty of fresh samples to whip up a vaccine. He may not show affection very often for her, but she is his and he’ll be damned if anything happens to her on his watch.

Jushiro - When it comes to being ill and bedridden, Jushiro is a pro. He’s well versed in administering medicine and seeing to the tasks needed to stay clean and get better. He has no problem spending lots of time with her snuggling in bed, reading to her, comforting her, playing games, and just reassuring her that everything will be all right. 

[hotvintagepoll]

Welcome to the HOT AND VINTAGE MOVIE STARS tournament! We are now finished with the Hot & Vintage Men Tournament; The Hot & Vintage Movie Women Tournament is ongoing. Submissions for hot vintage women are now closed, but we are accepting propaganda for those already in the bracket.

Round 1 of the Hot & Vintage Women Tournament began with 540 hot women in prelims. Round 1 starts Saturday, March 2nd, with posts going up over several days. All polls—including ongoing polls, previous rounds, old tournaments, the various shadow brackets, and fun mini polls—can be found in the #hotvintagepoll tag. Every poll in the Hot & Vintage Women Tournament will be tagged with the hot woman in it if you need to search for a hot woman in particular.

FAQs:

“Where is [my favorite hot woman]?” It depends. Are all the Round 1 polls up yet? Have you checked all the polls in the tag? Have you done a tag search for her? If you still haven’t found her, either nobody submitted her or she did not fit the criteria of being a movie woman from 1910-1970.

“Can I still submit hot women?” No, the submission window has closed. Please do not send in women you wish had made it into the bracket. I can’t do anything with those asks and they just make me sad.

“I have additional propaganda for the hot women!” Great! Send me an ask or reblog the poll and add your propaganda to it. If you see a separate post that relates to your hot woman, like a fancam or a gifset, you can tag me in it. I don’t boost all the propaganda I see or receive, but I try to boost the best of the best.

If you’re submitting propaganda for your hot lady, I don’t accept propaganda that’s from beyond the end of this tournament’s era (ie don’t send me pics of them from before 1910 or after 1970). I also don’t accept propaganda of TV appearances unless it’s clearly a cameo where they’re playing themselves. If you have a TON of photos to submit, please send a few asks instead of one long one. I watch every video I receive so I can add trigger warnings, so please don't send long videos—I don't have time to review them.

I don’t post or boost negative propaganda about any hot woman. If you really hate that a certain hot woman is winning, send me positive propaganda for their hot opponent. If you think a hot woman shouldn’t even be included in the tournaments because of scummy things she did in her lifetime, please read my take on it here.

If I see repetitive, trolling, and/or bigoted remarks in the comments, I may block you from this bracket. If you want to point out a hot woman’s flaws or misdemeanors, that’s fine, but if I see consistent bad-faith trolling, you will be blocked.

The views expressed in the propaganda are not my own. I don’t submit my own propaganda, and I don’t change what’s submitted beyond fixing spelling mistakes. If you hate a poll bio or a pic, let me know and send me something I can use instead. Thoughtless bitching will get blocked.

"Where are the hot men?" Most of them are in the shadow realm! Toshiro Mifune was crowned the winner of the Hot & Vintage Men Tournament, and the rest were banished where the sun never shines. You can find all the round 1 matchups here (thank you @markwatnae!), or you can search the archive by tag to find out more about what happened to all the different hot men.

"Why didn't my propaganda make it into the poll post?" Either I couldn't open the link, or there was so much submitted I could only pick a few. Because this tournament is so much bigger than the Hot & Vintage Men one, I'm limiting propaganda to 5 pics per hot lady for Round 1. I know, a bummer! I have to do it this way to keep myself sane. If you have a photo you really want the world to see, follow the propaganda guidelines above.

“My FAQ isn’t on here :(” send me an ask! I love hearing from you guys—just please check these basics first.

Thank you for being here! Enjoy the tournament.

[notdonesimpin]

unconditional ~h.i.~

hajime iwaizumi x fem!reader

warnings: i mean this is just fluff. i guess it has funny moments but just a family doing family tings

synopsis: we never know the love of a parent until we become a parent ourselves

a/n: so in this, you and iwa have three kids.  Kosuke(15), Hayami(10), and Toshiro(5) for a little background. um you guys were like 20 when Kosuke was born (isn’t necesary info but there you go) so needless to say he was a happy accident. hope you enjoy :)

We never know the love of a parent until we become a parent ourselves.

“Kosuke! Hayami! Toshiro! Dinner!” you yell up the stairs and make your way back to the kitchen. 

Your phone buzzed with a text from Iwaizumi. It read: Meant to text you earlier. Plane had a delay, so I’ll be back in two hours or so.

You sigh, typing back a quick reply as Toshiro says, “My favorite!”

You look up with a laugh before furrowing your brows. “What’s Kosuke doing?”

“I heard him singing. I guess he’s writing again. When’s dad getting home?” Hayami sits at the table and starts making her plate.

“There’s a delay, so it’ll be another two hours. Are you guys planning on wearing him down as soon as he gets here?” you tease.

“He promised he’d start showing me how to play volleyball when he got back!” Toshiro exclaims, tossing his arms in the air as you sit a plate down in front of him.

“He promised me we’d get a puppy! I don’t want him to forget!” Hayami adds.

“Well, the shelters are going to be closed when he gets back.” You shook your head in amusement, walking back towards the stairs. “Kosuke?!” you yell as you make your way upstairs. 

The closer you get to the end of the steps, the louder the sound of Kosuke’s singing becomes. 

You knock on the door and slowly open it to see him lying on the bed with his headphones in and eyes closed. 

“But a boy can dream his heart away that he’ll find a boy who swings his way… Sometimes I wish that I was straight. I wouldn’t have have to play these stupid games. Like analyzing the way he talks,” he softly sang, humming a few of the lines that he hadn’t quite figured out yet.

You lightly tap on his shoulder and his eyes shoot open as he pulls out his headphones. “Mom!” he exclaims.

“Writing a new song?” you ask, tapping the journal beside him as you sit on the edge of his bed.

“Yes, but it’s not what you think! I’m not into guys or anything,” he rambles, trying to think of some plausible excuse, “I just wanted to write a song from that perspective. It’s for the showcase at school.”

You softly smile, accepting the obvious lie as you get up and ruffle his hair. “Well, it sounds really good so far. I just wanted to tell you that dinner is ready,” you pause at the door, “Not to put any pressure on you because it is your moment, but if you are- I’m all ears. I’m sure your dad is, too.”

“Thanks, Mom.”

~

“Hey, Dad?” Kosuke speaks up as he walks in the living area and sits across from Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi looks up from Toshiro on his chest. “What’s up, Kosuke?”

“I want to talk to you about something…” Kosuke looks down, fiddling with his fingers.

Iwa notices the nervous habit and leans forward, taking Toshiro off of him. “Tosh, how about you go play with Mom for a little bit?” he suggests.

“Okay!” Toshiro rushes off.

“Is everything okay?” Iwaizumi asks.

“How’d you ask Mom out?”

“We had our final practice as third years and she went to eat with Oikawa and me afterwards. I walked her home to make sure she got back safely and told her that I wanted to keep hanging out with her after we graduated. Whether that be as friends or more than friends.”

“Dad, that’s so lame!” Kosuke groans.

Iwaizumi chuckles in amusement, “Well, it only worked because I already knew she liked me. She’s very bad at hiding her feelings. Is there someone you have a crush on?”

“Yeah, um,” Kosuke clears his throat, “There’s this guy in the music club with me. I thought we’d never talk outside of the club, but we started hanging out outside of school. I don’t know if he’s doing that because he likes me or because he just considers me a real friend.”

Iwaizumi nods, “Are you guys hanging out with a group or is it just the two of you most of the time?”

“It’s usually just the two of us. He started walking home with Hayami and me on the days where one of us couldn’t hang out.”

“From what you’re telling me, I think he likes you. If you’re worried about how to ask him, just do what feels right. It doesn’t have to be extravagant; it just has to truly convey how you feel. That’s why I told her the way that I did. We’d been friends for years, so I just talked to her like I always do.”

Kosuke’s eyes widen as he realizes that Iwaizumi didn’t even question that it was a guy. “Dad, I just told you that I like guys and you have no reaction…”

Iwaizumi softly smiles and ruffles the boy’s hair. “Who you like doesn’t matter as long as you’re happy. Girl, guy, non-binary. As long as they make you smile, I have no problems.”

Kosuke starts crying and attacks Iwaizumi in a hug, catching him by surprise and making him almost fall back on the ground as he wraps his arms around Kosuke.

“You haven’t hugged me like this since you were Hayami’s age,” Iwaizumi jokes, earning a small laugh from Kosuke.

“I’m just really happy that you accept me. I’d heard about so many people getting rejected by their parents. I didn’t want you to hate me.” 

The tears start falling harder down his son’s face as Kosuke moves back from Iwa to wipe his tears. Iwaizumi could feel his heart breaking from imagining how terrified Kosuke must have been.

“I could never hate you, Kosuke. I can’t even imagine a scenario where I would. You’ll always be my kid. What have I always told you?”

Kosuke sniffles, looking up to see the calm look of his father as he says, “Don’t be like Uncle Oikawa?”

Iwaizumi laughs, “Well, yes. But, on a serious note, you mom and I will always be here for you. Even when you think you don’t deserve it. Hell, even if you don’t want us to. You’re our first born. Though, we don’t treat you like a baby anymore because of your siblings, you’ll always be that baby boy I held in my arms who I swore to protect with my life if need be.”

“Kosuke! Can you run the store-” your words trail off as you see Kosuke’s tear stained cheeks.

“Ko? Are you sad?” Toshiro immediately asks, tears welling up in his own eyes from seeing his brother like that.

“What happened? Are you okay?”

Kosuke quickly gets up, wiping his eyes as he walks over to the both of you and wraps you in a tight hug.

Your eyes widen, wrapping your free arm around him. “What did I do to deserve this?” you say.

“When you heard me in my room the other day, you didn’t question or anything. You didn’t even tell Dad. Thank you for waiting.”

“Of course, Ko. It’s your secret. You should tell it when you’re ready.”

“I wanna know! I can keep a secret!” Toshiro wraps his arms around Kosuke, successfully getting out of your arms.

Hayami walks down the stairs, “Are we talking about Kosuke being gay?”

“I’m not gay, you little runt!” Kosuke retorts.

“Tell that to Kenji!” Hayami sticks out her tongue as you and Iwaizumi laugh at the pair.

[godkilller]

@izzabizz139

I wanna hear you rant about the Gin vs Hitsugaya anime fight bc I love seeing your pov and you clearly write better than whoever extended that scene :) pretty please

          out of character.  DON’T ENABLE ME SO MUCH !!  No but I cackled when I first saw this ask because oh my god, clearly you saw a taste of my annoyance about the anime adaptation -- no, adaptation implies it was accurate, I’ll say the anime’s take was “inspired by” the manga’s quick run-in. I’ll start by saying this moment is supposed to be a bit important considering, via the audience’s point of view, THIS IS THE FIRST WE SEE OF TWO CAPTAIN-RANKED SHINIGAMI CLASHING. The only other captain-involved fight we’ve seen thus far in the manga is Kenpachi  ( who is an outlier and should not be counted... no, I joke... but, still, Ichigo was not an equal to him, his sword was sliced through like butter. )  The whole reason I enjoyed this encounter between Toshiro and Gin was simply this; it wasn’t some fancy multi-chaptered fight. IN THE MANGA, THERE ARE ONLY TWO BLOWS MADE. One, by Toshiro, to begin the fight. The second, to end it, is Gin’s strike.

          I want you to know that I’ve rewatched this specifically to answer this ask, and only due to this, as I wouldn’t have ever sought it out otherwise. HONOR MY SACRIFICE.

          Read more for length. I’m merciful.

          In the anime, they monologue at each other, and it’s mostly a combination of Toshiro making three separate death threats  ( he starts this off by saying “I’ll kill you before Hinamori arrives” and then goes on rewording it each time, and then also repeats the death-threat he gave Gin prior to this conflict about “I’ll kill you if Hinamori bleeds” )  and then also Gin and Izuru talking about how truly powerful and amazing Toshiro is -- no, this isn’t me being bitter or petty, I literally shit you not, Gin has a line that is legit “AS EXPECTED FROM HITSUGAYA TOSHIRO, CAPTAIN OF THE TENTH DIVISION, A CHILD PRODIGY OF TH' SORT THAT ONLY COMES ALONG ONLY ONCE EVERY FEW CENTURIES. HOW VEEEERY DANGEROUS. YOU’RE SERIOUS, AIN’T YA?” like don’t get me wrong, love a good sarcastic little shit comment like that, but the amount of times the anime pumps Toshiro up like he’s their shinest new cash cow ( and he is, at this point, it is not even 50 episodes into the series and they’ve realized everyone likes him and he’s jumped to high ranks in popularity polls... earning him filler spotlights, and eventually his very own non-canon movie )  so everything coming out of Gin’s mouth feels like more bullshit than necessary. Izuru’s already literally monologued, internally, how powerful and amazing Toshiro is anyways. Why this ?

          Not to mention that, prior to saying that long-winded shit, Gin’s haori changed length three times  ( and once it was longer than his entire body by several feet, and no not in a ‘to show motion’ way )  and most importantly Shinso was drawn, consistently, at katana-length for the duration of their little spat where the following, too, happened: Gin frog-leaps after doing a backflip, Toshiro gives Gin two (2) haircuts, Gin ruins some floorboards and gives Toshiro at least one splinter in his arm, Toshiro whilst wearing socks lands on Shinso’s blunt edge and pushes the sword down with his footsie because that’s how that works, there’s another backflip somewhere in there that Gin doesn’t need to be doing, twirl, twirl, and ballet, Gin’s face elongates until his chin is bigger than his face, Gin spends ten+ seconds purely dodging very close strikes to his face as Toshiro is the only one making breathy growly and ‘tsuuaaah’ sounds, there is a brief moment of no gravity as Toshiro keeps hacking at Gin midair and Gin blocks it over and over again but they still stay in the air but they’re not standing or jumping or using reiatsu they’re just like, momentum-locked I don’t fucking know, Gin frowny faces as he blocks because like somehow this kid who doesn’t even have more reiatsu than him, whose arm strength should not be an issue, is like. making him nervous?? as sword sparks fly. if you know me at all you know I hate when they fuckin’ firework sparkler-ify swords clashing.

          Anyways, all of this happens whilst Shinso is the wrong length and Gin’s hair is getting purpler by the second and this entire thing is somehow a big jack-off to Toshiro’s immense strength even though he’s screaming and wailing at Gin like a child and Gin’s just a vessel at this point to Enhance Toshiro, which, fine, okay, but at least be more accurate with it god damn. ANYWAYS,

          THEY JOUST. They literally run at each other, swords centered, and run past / to the side of one another. Jousting. “Cause that’s how that works. No slashes, no cutting motion. Just swords centered, because the animators were like “no worries guys I know swordfighting basics that’s a legit pose” yeah it is WHEN STATIONARY. Not rUNNING IT DOWN.

          And then Gin’s sleeve is cut, somehow, from the Jousting, because wow Toshiro wow wow wowowowow, and then Toshiro comes back and starts wailing at Gin again and Gin blocks it, again, and it’s all very annoyingly repetitive, and Gin’s frowning and sparks are flying and Gin’s using Shinso, the katana-length wakizashi I guess, with two hands because like I said, the animators knew basics and basics are “katana are used two-handed” like. Okay, you’re not wrong, but I cannot stress this enough: SHINSO IS NOT A KATANA. It’s shorter and meant to be used single-handed!!!! sTop!!! So then Gin rips off the tattered part of his sleeve and throws it at Toshiro, who swipes it away from his face using his Zanpakuto because that’s intelligent and a piece of cloth was definitely threatening enough to use your sword to bat it away  ( btw, Hitsugaya wasn’t holding his sword with two hands at this precise moment, so he could have just... used his other hand )  and then Gin goes in for the classic “stabby stabby rapidly at you while the animation gets a little breather because we repeat this cycle a few times with flashy bgs and phew money made” ... WE ARE FOUR MINUTES AND THIRTY SECONDS INTO THIS FIGHT BY THE WAY. Gin does this for seventeen (17) agonizing seconds straight. Yes, I counted. That was sixteen and a half too many seconds for me, personally.

          Toshiro somehow lassos Shinso whilst Gin is stabby stabby-ing with Hyourinmaru’s chain component. I say component like it’s somehow some type of beauty guru’s lipstick holder, but really am I that wrong ? When else has he ever used this feature ? Anyways, he lassos Shinso because yeehaw I guess, god I’m falling apart at this point can y’all tell????? I need a drink.

          and so, because now Toshiro has Gin’s sword somehow trapped with chain even though it’s just looped around it, he backflips over Gin for a cool trickshot, no blow issued, just vibes, and Gin uses a big brain moment to tug Shinso and the chains slide off. okay now what. We’re past five minutes into this fight, nonstop.

          SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD TIME FOR GIN TO PAUSE AND APPRECIATE TOSHIRO AGAIN! “I see, I shouldn’t have underestimated you, HItsugaya Toshiro” I’m starting to have a feeling Gin’s VA was told to just wing these lines because the amount of times he fills silences / Gin’s mouth movements with Toshiro’s long-ass name is astounding, he’s definitely drawing blanks here but he sure as hell knows one thing: that damn ice-boy’s name. He continues by saying “I suppose I’ll end up regretting it afterwards.”

          Toshiro says that’s not enough, and it’s really dramatic and cool. His eyes even glow all icy and blue and pretty, like his flowy reiatsu. Aesthetic points were gifted entirely to Toshiro’s animations in this scene. Gin was finished in MS Paint and each new scene they had to draw Shinso from memory and try to remember what hue of purple his hair was at gunpoint. Toshiro lets off a big wave of reiatsu and then it vanishes, and he jumps up reaaaally high. like this guy’s flying. his eyes arent glowing anymore that’s sad. Bring Back Glowing Eyes For Strong Shinigami 2k21.

          Toshiro releases his Shikai, and it’s badass, the sky darkens, Izuru looks distinctly more worried than usual, and Gin’s frowning with his teeth out like Bugs Bunny’s having a bad day, all is right in the world. Toshiro and his released Shikai have a nice moment for the Pics, and a big epic freeze frame blur moment happens with it all coiled and swirling around him. Wrow!  ( click the ‘wrow’ it’s a link to my exact reaction )  Izuru narrates for the third time about how powerful Toshiro is, his reiatsu, his Zanpakuto being a deity who is only unlocked every few centuries. The strongest ice-type sword. Pardon the pun, but that’s... you could say, so cool.

          It can even control the weather. So hey, next time it’s rainy, cold, icy, or snowing and you’re unhappy, it’s time to direct a big fuck you at Toshiro.

          Gin dodges the first dragon, and blocks the second with Shinso because blocking water and ice with a sword makes sense right? This actually takes a solid amount of seconds as Gin cuts through the entire length of this ice dragon noodle. Things dissipate, and pause, too, to really drag this out. Surprisingly, this reveals that Gin’s made a boo-boo, his left arm’s frozen, which doesn’t even mean anything because Gin is right-handed, and Toshiro teleports himself behind Gin in true fighty fashion.

          We have arrived at seven minutes and just under twenty seconds of this fight, and Gin turns, DOES THE UNTHINKABLE, gasp! He opens his eyes. His red, dull, evil, gray-eyebrowed with purple hair eyes, and shoots Shinso through its hideout spot behind his haori. This nearly takes off Toshiro’s eye and upwards of his head, but the little guy dives down fast. The rest happens in slow motion, supposedly, because it takes an eternity and people talk entire full sentences in its span of time.

          Gin asks Toshiro if he’s sure he’d like to dodge that  ( it’s a little late for that ) and says that Momo’ll die if he does. SHINSO SCRAPING ALONG AGAINST HYOURINMARU STRANGELY MAKES NOT A SINGLE SOUND. Mute. Even though before they had no problem animating and adding sounds to them smacking blades earlier. There are soundless sparks though, so there’s that. Yay. Can you tell how exhausted this’s made me? I need a nap.

          Shinso is already more than halfway towards Momo, still unconscious, she most definitely has a serious concussion via Toshiro backhanding her midair consider she’s been unconscious for longer than ten minutes. Toshiro has time to get up off the floor where he dropped to dodge, realize with a shocked gasp, turn, shout her name, and watch as Rangiku arrives in a random glow of gold which never happens ever again and blocks the attack with Haineko. Haineko almost cracks on the impact, and continues growing in damage as Rangiku holds Shinso there, implying that she’s stopped it from reaching one-hundred sword’s lengths to pierce Momo. Yes I’m including that implication / note in here because we love to see Rangiku succeeding in life and being Not-Helpless, all while potentially damaging Haineko severely if it wasn’t able to hold him off. Yikes, Gin!

          Rangiku threatens to join the fight if he doesn’t withdraw his sword. Gin smiles, withdraws it, and then Shunpos away.

          Whatta mess. Oh, and the anime fight was pretty fucked up, too.

          This is a long post, but here’s the manga version:

Toshiro leaps into the air,

This is where the fight actually starts between them:

And end. 

Five pages. Two blows. Does not equate to ten minutes of non-stop fighting and monologues. Sometimes, and I mean this in the most unbiased way possible, less is more.

[dropintomanga]

Processing Meaningful Death in Anime/Manga

A few college students got some psychology headlines recently as they completed a study published in Omega - Journal of Death and Dying about meaningful deaths in fiction across various media. The students asked 3 online groups the following - 1 group was asked to think of a death scene that was meaningful to them, 1 group was asked to think of a death scene that was pleasurable to them, and the last group was asked to think about a death scene in general.

All participants were asked about emotional responses to characters’ deaths, appreciation and enjoyment of the death scene, and perceptions of the characters who died.

So the results of the study went like this - fans who found pleasure in characters’ deaths were almost always tied to villains. Fans who found meaning in characters’ deaths were tied to characters who weren’t exactly heroes or villains. The best example given in the study is Breaking Bad’s Walter White. What’s also noted was that action/horror/thriller stories weren’t really associated with having meaningful death scenes according to fans in the study compared to dramas and tear-jerkers. 

One of the researchers made a more fascinating note in that fans in the 3rd group (those who were just asked about a death scene and nothing more) gave the same answers as those in the group that was asked about meaningful death scenes. The researcher suggests that death in a fiction is an outlet to process one’s own grief.

With that said, a lot of mainstream anime/manga is action-oriented and involves notable good guy/anti-hero characters dying. The death scenes in anime/manga tend to be very emotional. I’ve had friends talk to me about Portgas D. Ace, Maes Hughes, Itachi Uchiha and many other characters whose deaths touched them. It’s unfortunate that the study didn’t elaborate further regarding series that mix elements of action/comedy/drama/romance/suspense as mainstream anime/manga series do this.

I’ve been thinking about whether an anime character’s death has helped someone process a loved one’s death and the grief that comes with it. Death isn’t an easy subject to talk about in the Western part of the world. I know many people want you to move on fast or else you’re a failure. I think what’s worse is that almost everyone (including medical professionals) isn’t trained at all to talk about death. Some people take a long time to grieve and I wish more people were sympathetic to that.

What I like about anime and manga (well, Japanese pop culture) in general is that they tell us life is finite. One of my favorite games ever, Persona 3, tells its players “Memento mori,” a reminder that we will all die one day. I think the one anime/manga character death that still leaves me in tears was Mitsuba Okita’s in Gintama. Everything about that event (how it started to how it ended) was just heart-wrenching. I also can never forget Toshiro Hijikata’s epic line about his feelings towards Mitsuba. The Mitsuba story was a reminder on how much having friends who give a shit about you (and may have to hit you physically to demonstrate it) matter in the face of a tragic loss. I learned recently that who you are doesn’t determine how your body will behave. Good people do get sick for no reason and there’s not much you can do about it. 

I do hope fans who found meaning through any favorite character who died try to apply lessons from them to their own lives somehow. Everyone’s grieving so much. I feel like we should just sit by someone who’s dying or in bereavement and listen to their stories. Ignoring death, which anime and manga strives not to do, is basically the death of our humanity.

If you remember a character death scene that was meaningful to you, feel free to share it with me in the comments below!