#Understanding Zero Knowledge Proof

[fatesundress]

⭑ lessons in wanting. tom riddle x reader

summary. “you try so hard to be in control, and yet in this one thing, you can’t.” “can you?” of course you can; your will has been steel as long as you’ve had it. you could walk away now if you wanted. but you step forward. and tom understands.

tags. 18+ MDNI, explicitly fem afab reader, loosely implied hogwarts university au as always, academic rivals, pureblood reader, she is WEIRD okay i can’t do y/n stuff anymore she’s just got some issues, poor parental relationship, she probably needs a therapist but so does tom so it’s like pedmas basically, students have individual dorms for the sake of smut you're just gonna have to suspend your disbelief ok. tom has a bursary i don't know, fingering, cunnilingus, first times, freak4freak

note. HAPPY TWO YEARS OF FATESUNDRESS! i think the time between when i last wrote smut + the knowledge that i now have moots who are aware of this account and that it is me (GO AWAY!!!!) have worked in agonizing synchrony to give me the worst writer’s block of my life. every word typed felt like it was being spoken directly into a confessional booth. i may never write smut again. we move.

word count. 7k

It started as a natural pastime. Your name rose above his, his rose about yours, bouts of envy crossed bouts of pride and fizzled into renewed initiative. The goal in all of it was the same as it had been since you were a child: to do your best, and be sure your best was better than everyone else’s. Your parents endeavoured to see you to live up to your station and you made it your job to do just that. The fear was instilled in you young — that an ancestral name could draw as much scrutiny as glory if it wasn’t tended well.

So you tend to it. You just have no idea when doing your best morphed specifically into doing better than him.

At some point, though, the importance of the latter supplanted that of the first, and now you wade through your academic achievements drenched in bitterness and lumbering under their weight. A wet, sulking cat, Annette would call you. Congratulatory confetti has become an itch, and ovation a headache. No prize compares to the instantaneous stiffness of Tom Riddle’s shoulders at the call of your name on the top of some comparatively irrelevant list. Nothing is quite so sweet as your smile when you watch the muscles roll negligibly back into place, a little crack of his neck as his perfect posture is resumed, and, God — is he ever not performing?

Inspiration is inspiration. Your good grades don’t care why they’re good.

“Apprenticeships will open in the spring,” you say in a needless hurry, foot tapping under the table, two books open on either side of your breakfast, “which means I need to start planning which ones to try for.”

“I assumed you were trying for them all,” says Annette, her brow raised curiously. She drizzles an impressive amount of syrup over her plate.

“Of course I’m trying for them all. But I have to decide which one I actually want.”

“That should be an issue for when you’re sorting through acceptance letters, shouldn’t it? You’ll pass every test they give you, you don’t have to decide right now.”

“My parents will want an answer. Besides —” Your gaze zeroes in on his figure at the Slytherin table — “I want to know which one will bother Riddle the most.”

Annette blinks, dumbfounded. “I always wonder if I missed the part where he maimed you in first year or something. You know you don’t need to prove yourself to him, right? He’s intimidated enough as is, even if it doesn’t show.”

But you want it to show. What prize is worth more than that? What better proof of your prowess than to beat him in a way that visibly hurts?

You shrug, but it’s tense. “I’m not above admitting the maiming’s been done to my ego. To you, anyway — don’t tell anyone I said that.”

She continues to stare incredulously at you while the tines of her fork stab a pancake. You should know better than to think she would.

“It was somewhat motivational at first,” you sigh, relenting somewhat, “And sometimes it’s still fun, but I mean, he’s just so… Merlin, he’s so…”

“Good.”

Your agreement is a face plant and groan into your textbook.

It’s Defense Against the Dark Arts then.

Two months later, with eyes sunken by the sleeplessness of a winter holiday with your extended family and a new year rampant with work, you prepare. DADA is Hogwarts’ entry into several Ministry fields — auror, DMAC agent, virtually anything in the Department of Mysteries — but you know the position Riddle is vying for is within the castle walls. Everyone knows that. You have no interest in it, but if a poxy little office at Hogwarts is his heart’s desire, far be it for you not to make him sweat for it.

So you let him take notice. Your notes are sprawling with counter-curses, your textbooks with addendums, even your wrists — when parchment is sparse — are bleeding with the ink of cursory reminders: advanced concealment charms, manticore trails, sustained langlock. You have no idea what knowledge is expected on the test, so you reassert your knowledge of all of it.

The day Tom realises your intention, there’s all but a tic in his jaw to prove it. Good enough for you.

He’s returning a bottle to the potions cabinet while you’re feeling proud of yourself, when he stops behind you, barely clicks his tongue at your open notebook, and remarks tonelessly, “Manticore skin isn’t resistant to freezing spells.”

You tilt your head, mouth agape. He’s already gone.

“I think I might actually aim for DADA professor now,” you tell Annette that night, scowling, stomach-down on your four-poster with your head in your hands. “I mean genuinely, out of spite. I don’t want him to have it.”

Her reflection glares at you as she puts her hair into curlers.  “You’ve officially lost it.”

“You didn’t see him, Nettie! He was so smug about it —”

“Which you are not.”

“Ugh.” You’re almost shaking. It’s objectively embarrassing. “The galleons I would give to see him fail at something, just once…”

She flops onto her bed and waves off the light. “Best of luck with that, darling.”

Luck is not what you need.

You’re certain he’s sped up his studies in some regard for the fact that your name remains firmly below his in DADA for the next three weeks. It’s always been his best subject, yes, but there should be some degree of fluctuation. That’s the game. You cross him only for him to push harder and find his way back, and vice versa. But ever since your stint in Potions, he’s immovable. And yet, if his efforts have indeed doubled, he doesn’t show it at all.

Tom Riddle is impervious. You’re starting to think he’s not entirely human.

There’s something exhilarating, typically, about competing with him — about even being entertained as contest. You won’t deny you’re impressed by him as much as you’re frustrated; that he’s managed to climb so high from the strange, quiet boy you remember in your early years, a muggle-born with nothing to his name — he’s still completely amiss, wrong inside in a way you can’t quite deduce, and you do vow to best him, but that isn’t nothing.

The usual exhilaration is lost in his refusal to give you so much as an inch. There’s no fight. You’re in the library day in and day out, your parents have been made aware of your newfound interest in DADA which means the course is set, and Tom doesn’t even have the decency to seem annoyed.

You avert his stolen glance when he enters that evening after dinner, in the slim hours before curfew when most would rather study in their common rooms. Minutely straighter, you cross your legs and jot something down in your notes.

He chooses to sit at a table directly in your line of sight. The prick.

It takes fifteen minutes and profound effort to fully re-immerse yourself in your work, and then your knee taps the edge of the table in rapid focus rather than frustrated distraction. In the last free hours of the night, you write five thoughtful pages assessing the many theories on Patronus forms and causality. The moonlight is soft on your cheek, your hand clamps down on a yawn, and you feel almost sated. Riddle aside, the research is good. You almost understand his interest. You almost don’t glance at him at all (except when he rummages through his bag for new ink, or another student departs and your eyes are pulled to him by no fault of your own but the tug toward movement) or wonder with your head stubbornly down whether he’s glanced at you at all.

He clears his throat. He’s standing at your table (since when?), a brow raised in scrutiny at your notes. On instinct you tuck them into your book. “Did you need something?”

His mouth tugs at the corner. “The library is closing.”

Oh. Lips pursed, you nod, slightly ruffled, but you'll be damned if he knows that. “Right. Thanks."

He waits for something more, but you only start to tidy your work. 

“Were you working on the Patronus Charm?” he asks. 

Catch.

“No," you say obviously, because it's an insult for him to think you'd need to. “I was studying theories on the Patronus Charm."

 “I fail to see the distinction.” 

Bite.

“A reflection of your cursory judgement," you say through a tight smile, yanking your bag over your shoulder and standing up.

There’s a hint of dryness in his tone, a flicker of his brows going up at your reaction. You offered too much. Still, he answers with a smile either more honest than your own, or more believable in its deception. “Allow me to walk you back.” 

Reel.

Or do the muggles call it hook, line, sinker?

Oh, but how soft his voice is when he’s caught. He would be so good at being kind if he could mean it.

“I’m quite fine on my own,” you answer stiffly, striding past him.

“Shall I pace myself ten steps behind you as we walk in the same direction, then? That’s rather inconvenient for us both."

You don’t appreciate how even his derision is masked in charisma, like it’s lighthearted, like you’re friends. It’s starting to feel somewhat manipulative — that he plays the part so well you might have begun to doubt yourself were you a few cells lighter in the head. Fortunately, you are not. You scowl away the imprint of doubt like the most bitter of women, ironically antithetical to your parents’ desires for you (which are, of course, still a factor in why you’re doing all of this): that you be a wise, accomplished, pretty pureblood heir sans disposition of an ired spinster. 

It’s not your fault, really. It’s just Tom.

“Do as you like,” you tell him, and he would like, apparently with great interest, to walk with you.

His shoes click smoothly on the stone, so much sleeker and finer than the ones you remember he wore once, and he doesn’t allow you the reprieve of silence.

“You’re markedly more interested in Defense Against the Dark Arts this term.”

How does a sentence so innocuous feel so much like winning? Because he cares. He noticed — he cares. God, you’re pathetic, but it sparks to life two realizations and a question.

There is a game at play here.

He’s playing it too.

How long has it been going?

It doesn’t matter. You bury your glee, admittedly overeager and underlaid with exhaustion.

“Apprenticeships will be filling soon,” you hum noncommittally, “I realized I overlooked the subject.”

“I wasn’t aware you overlooked anything.”

You raise a brow. “Apparently so, unless you’ve been looking too much.”

“My apologies,” he says unapologetically, “I only meant to say you’re otherwise astute. I’ve a tendency to find my compliments lost in my presumptions, but then most people don’t notice that either, so perhaps I was right.”

“Or perhaps you presume as excessively as you look.”

He smiles. There’s nothing kind in it. “Do you resent the observation itself or that I’m the one making it?”

“Are you arguing with me?” you ask dumbly, but if a bullet-point list of Things Tom Riddle Does Not Do is in the making, and he’s already offered you self-deprecation, self-awareness, and addressing the unspoken, then arguing plainly should be next. There are far dumber things to ask.

He doesn’t look to agree, and he’s still smiling insufferably. “Not at present. Best of luck with the apprenticeship.”

The door to your common room sighs open with his muttered passphrase. You hadn’t even realized you’d arrived. He doesn’t glance back at you once as he enters, disappearing into the men’s dormitories before you have half a response conjured. Of course, you dwell on it all night, considering a hundred worthy rebuttals to be better prepared next time.

Next time is not for another two months.

Exam season is approaching with a pace rapid enough to stir even the more careless academics among your peers. Quidditch has taken pause, the library is full each night, and a few professors have opened their offices an extra hour or two for additional assistance. You take them up on it often. If you weren’t sleeping before, you certainly aren’t now. Your eyes are bloodshot as a teething vampire’s — a creature for which you now know more than you’d ever cared to before — and your hands jittery with an age beyond your own. You are, effectively, destroying yourself. It makes your parents incredibly proud.

Their letters urge you through the season, stern reminders of potential arrangements to marry and social events dotting every weekend of the summer, that a witch who’s devoted so much of herself to her studies must finish with something to show for it. It’s support in the loosest definition, but it’s what you know. Annette, fortunately, has also come around to your chosen field (though she continues to remind you your reasons are ridiculous), and so you persevere, entangled with the Dark Arts in a way that you never imagined you’d actually enjoy. The predicament is horrible, of course; you would have done well to retain the information from the past near-decade of studies instead of cramming it for a quick runner-up mark.

Is there a way to blame this on Tom? You’ll find one.

He’s an efficient puppeteer, you’ll give him that. The wane and wax of his interest stirs at a nascent hunger in you. He knows exactly how much to offer before rescinding it. His approval, and better yet his ire, are somehow more desirable than that of your pureblood competitors. They were always going to be a challenge. Tom was owed nothing, and had taken it anyway.

If Annette could hear your thoughts she’d urge you to write a love letter and get it over with. Internally, you argue with this imaginary accusation.

This time it’s the common room, half-empty as moonlight spills into the lake, and he takes the seat opposite yours without greeting. He settles softly. You stiffen, finger at the corner of your current page. You hover over a chapter on Ekrizdis until the letters blur.

“You weren’t at dinner,” he finally says.

“Am I your charge?” you respond without looking up. 

You’re giddy. You cannot let it show on your face. His observation alone is an admission of defeat that you will not mar by feeding into it.

“Technically the entirety of Slytherin house are my charges.”

“Then you should at least pretend to remain impartial.”

“Perhaps you could teach me so that I might improve, beginning with pretending to read to appear indifferent.”

You glare at him over the edge of your book and set it down quite forcefully on the table. You cross your legs. You cross your arms for good measure. The huff of air is not for display — he’s just incredibly annoying.

And he smiles. Barely.

“I don’t think I need to teach Tom Riddle the art of pretending,” you say coolly, “Nor do I need his lecture.”

“Meaning?”

“Ah, see? Now you’re pretending to be stupid. I think you understand exactly what I mean.”

“And you’re pretending to have enough interest in Defense Against the Dark Arts to pursue a career in it.”

“You obviously have some assumption you’d like to share, so by all means, do.”

“Well, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to get my attention.”

You scoff up a laugh. “If I were, I’m sure I’d be thrilled. You’re here. I evidently have it.”

“And what do you intend to do with it?”

He’s serious. Serenely, slow-blinkingly serious. 

It’s a preposterous question, for one, and you’re momentarily stunned by the urge to interrogate what answer he wants, rather than consider the truth. And you think maybe that is the answer: to make him want what only you can give him. The evidence of it is sitting in front of you. You’ve pushed beyond curiosity and into fixation. He wants to understand and you want him to be driven mad by it. There is nothing else to ‘do with his attention.’ This is it.

Your lack of response only spurs him on. “How far are you going to take this?”

You don’t know. Merlin, you have no fucking idea, because you don’t know what you want. A petty contest should not induce an identity crisis, but — how far are you going to take this? The outline of your life is all but preordained: you’ll graduate, you’ll attend the obligatory summer social rituals, you’ll sit through idle conversation with potential marriage matches like the muggle women of last century, and you’ll work in any field you like because you’re good at everything and not particularly interested in anything. 

DADA is… different. You’re not too fussed about the performance of it in the way most aurors are, waving their wands with the most impressive spells they can think of. It’s the subtleties not taught in your curriculum that have been fascinating. The history of how these spells came to be, the origins of the monsters and by extension the necessity of new protections, the mastery of invention, of bestial capture, of strenuous research compiled over millennia; the core of the subject is phenomenally understated, and for that reason understandably overlooked. 

And maybe professor at Hogwarts is not your highest aspiration — that’s still the game — but you’ve craned your neck over too many tomes in the past few months to dismiss the entirety of your study as summer refuse.

“How far can I take it before you stop me?” you ask instead.

He smiles. “I don’t intend to stop you.”

“It doesn’t bother you?”

“What? Watching you struggle, for once, to keep your place beside mine? No.”

He says it with such certainty that your cheeks go hot. Like it’s so absurd to imagine you could ever get to him.

“Say what you like,” you press, defensive, “but you’ve come to me twice now, and I know your intrigue is never without suspicion. Do you vanish from the library merely to study more frantically alone? Do you go there only to sit in my line of sight?”

“Do you watch me?”

Embarrassment has a habit of making you angry. Some might say it stems from entitlement. You don’t really care. With all of the etiquette you’ve spent your lifetime absorbing swiftly discarded, you rise from your seat, grab your book, and tell him with the words a bit uncanny to fuck off.

Admittedly, a few more seconds and you might have come up with something less inarticulate and more befitting your station.

Barely halfway across the carpet, you stop, laugh, turn on your heel and laugh again, because how dare he? “You came here just to inform me of my absence at dinner, you absolute — you watch me!”

You stomp off again, passing by his chair when he speaks.

“I do.”

Your heel snags on the tassels of the carpet. The book is comically heavy. There’s a gust of wind, underground, in a room with no open windows, for the first time in the thousand years since its construction. These are the reasons you stumble. There is no correlation between those two words and your feet slipping out from under you.

And yet, you don’t fall. Only in the most blatant sense is crisis averted.

When his fingers balance you by the hip, it is well and truly not because it’s Tom that you react. You’d swear the same thing under Veritaserum and hear the words spill out true: touch is touch. Human beings who have long gone without it will respond when they finally get it, no matter the person. A shudder. A reflex. An instinct to lean in or out, and yes, this time it’s in. That’s all it is; Tom’s instinct — uncharacteristically kind, perhaps — to wrap his hand around whatever will steady you, with fingers long and pressure firm. 

You suck in a breath, goosebumps darting across the sliver of skin exposed by your raised jumper. It’s not because it’s Tom that you react. It is absolutely because it’s Tom that you react like this.

This, to be clear, is not much. For a woman accused of obsession, you’d hold up decently under Annette’s scrutiny now. It is the aforementioned shudder and horripilation at his sudden touch, a fleeting little gasp like opening a door and finding it a few degrees colder than expected, but you hardly tremble in his hold like a vestal damsel. And you are technically exactly that, so what does it matter? Tom Riddle certainly hasn’t been busying himself between anyone’s legs with all the time he doesn’t have, and if he had you would have known, because everyone would have known, and all things considered it’s a bit strange to wonder with such defensiveness at someone’s hypothetical virginity, but describing Tom’s as hypothetical at all is honestly a testament to your generosity.

It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t need to be much. All it takes is the moment of hesitation before pulling away to become aware of the point of contact. Not that it’s owed or wanted or reviled in any way, but that it had not existed before and now it does. And this, in every tangible way, changes nothing, but in his eyes, slipping away with apology, you understand quite ridiculously that it might change everything. Now it exists, and that means it could exist again.

The thought doesn’t take long to ruin your life.

In fairness, you’ve done a great job of ruining your life all on your own, and this is really a footnote in a very long list, but the ink bleeds through the rest. You are stained by awareness, itching through spring allergies and schoolwork and preparations for graduation. It’s there under everything: the knowing. Some irrational anticipation for a thing you can’t name. Tom hands you a beaker in Potions and you’re actively avoiding the brush of his pinky like you’re five years old and newly horrified at the prospect of cooties. The knowledge goes both ways, of course — Tom is too perceptive not to have noticed the change began with his fingers on your skin — but you’re not so egotistical to imagine it’s as ruinous for him as it is for you.

God, you hope it is.

May comes. Sun bursts through Scottish rain, pulling you (by Annette’s hand) to study in the courtyards for the final stretch of your final term. Your mother sends flowers and well-wishes wrapped in delicate warnings. The message is in her letter as delicately as it wafts through your dormitory in a bouquet of anemone and cosmos: anticipation and order: this is it. Her reminder resides in a charmed vase on your windowsill, red as a blister. 

The tests for the various apprenticeships offered to graduating students are not so dissimilar from the ones you took in your earlier schooling, and Annette wasn’t wrong in assuring you you’d pass them easily. Of course, you won’t be told until the summer that you’ve passed them, but you know. You don’t falter for a moment. Not for the Ministry’s trials or the Alchemist’s League or St. Mungo’s Healer’s Apprenticeship. It’s half an effort to surpass their expectations; the worst consequence at the end of each day is a sore wrist. 

At night, you lie in bed and wonder if it’s the lack of competition. There’s no board to track your name on, and no one you respect who wants the positions you’re seeking anyway, and you’re hardly seeking them yourself, and — is it respect? Is that what you feel for Tom? 

You don’t know. The more you succeed, the less you seem to feel at all.

By June, you’ve exhausted every trial but the undesirables, and the charm on your mother’s flowers has begun to falter. Red petals wilt to brown on your windowsill.

So when a hollow morning rises where you decide to do something you want, with no one else to tell you to want it, you do it quietly, because you’re not sure you know how to do it any other way.

It’s a Sunday. The halls are quieter, dispersed now that there’s light outside to relish in, and there’s no need to tiptoe like you’re out past dark, but you may as well. The post was pinned outside Tomes and Scrolls. The vellum was fittingly thin and ecru, with no flourishments or golden frame. And there you went, and here you are, and it feels like a belated teenage rebellion to even entertain something so simple.

The test is half spoken and half defensive. None of the spells are extraordinary displays of magic, but practical — examples of what you might need to know should you ever encounter the odd danger in a field study. The recruiter is old. His skin is sun-spotted and honey. He wears fabrics of great texture and colour, with seams worn from years of use, and in his eyes you see the glint of everything he has seen. There’s so much of it. He isn’t a paid lackey of some magical superior, reading from a script designed to buy you too. He is a living extension of his study. There’s no contest, and so there’s no prize, and for once, absolutely fucking nonsensically, you want. You feel something.

In the courtyard, with your textbook open beside you, Annette picks wildflowers in hues of yellow. You empty your mother’s vase and fill it with them instead.

“It’s an archivist position,” you tell her quietly, like it’s a secret, “or — it’s a bit complicated. There are archives in the shop, but the job is field archaeology? He studies the birthplaces of magic, old battlefields and castles and — I don’t know. I liked it.”

Annette laughs, shaking her head.

You sulk. “You think it’s ridiculous.”

“Stop,” she scolds, but her smile is still there. “I think it’s fucking brilliant, actually.”

“What?”

“You’re doing something just because you like it. It’s been a long time since you’ve done that.”

You bite your cheek. “So I should take it, if I get it?”

Annette deadpans, your name flat and accusatory when she speaks. “If you don’t take this job, I’m going to kill you.”

Ear-to-ear, you grin.

In the last weeks of school, you write only a brief letter to your parents and await a howler each morning at breakfast. You receive none. There’s only a slip of parchment too small to fill an envelope, falling over your first meal of June.

We’ll discuss it when you’re home, your mother says. Sincerely is how the message ends, but you wouldn’t call it that.

Shoved swiftly into your pocket, you find you care less than you probably should.

The repetitive ritual of saying goodbyes and see-you-laters becomes tedious when you’re unsure who falls into which category. You gift your favourite professors small tokens of gratitude and wish them well. Courses dwindle to the summer-steady pace of a curriculum at its bittersweet end, with nothing but a week’s worth of exams to keep you here. It’s nice. To sit in the sun over shared notes and reminisce, to wonder whose faces you’ll know long enough to see age, and who will filter to this moment in time.

Tom is under one of the trees, shaded from the sun and kissed by the breeze. You can’t place which one he’ll be to you.

It’s harder to decide this than the archivist post. Annette, like she’s been waiting for you to come to a conclusion she had years ago, is the one to push you. There are no threats of murder this time, but her glare instills fear enough. Now you’re here, pacing a corridor you had to charm to get to, which feels ridiculous already, but — you can want more than once, can’t you? You can have more than one thing, for no selfless reason, or selfish reward, and with great risk to your pride.

So you knock. A moment passes. You think your heart is going to burst from your chest.

The door to Tom’s dormitory opens and he looks exactly how you imagined he would, late at night, alone and still half-performing. He’s taken off his blazer, at least, folded over the back of his chair, quill propped on an ink pot and candles softly dancing. His tie is absent. You try not to let your eyes drift too far down from his undone buttons, but — so is his belt. He’s as dishevelled as you’ve ever seen him, and the surprise that flickers across his face is still gone too soon.

You swallow. Sense would inform you that this is where a greeting goes; you don’t provide him with one.

“I’m not going for your post.”

Tom straightens somewhat. “You’re not.”

“No.”

“Just like that?”

“It wasn’t quite that simple, but yes, I suppose.”

“So that’s the answer, then? To how far you’d go?” he asks, chin raised, “Right to the end only to not follow through — It’s unlike you.”

“It’s not like that,” you protest, because it isn’t, you’re not giving up or handing him anything. “I didn’t know if I wanted it or not. Now I know I don’t.”

“And what did you want?”

“I wanted it to bother you.”

“Why?”

You sigh. “Does it matter now?”

“Well, for once you came to me. I’m assuming it was for more than to tell me the job is mine.”

“The job isn’t yours yet, Riddle. Some other poor sop might still take it out from under you.”

“I’d curse them for it. Why did you come here?”

“Would you have cursed me?”

He says your name, softly, a warning to steer you back in place. He’s smiling, so slightly you wouldn’t notice if you hadn’t trained yourself to notice everything about him. “Why did you come here?”

You know he won’t ask again.

“Because I didn’t know what I wanted, and now I do, and for a while it was bothering you, and then it became bigger than you. I don’t know when that happened.” You shake your head, aware of the insanity of your confession. “I like the work. It was unnerving at first; I’ve almost forgotten how to like anything without some greater reason, and now the reason is just me, and somehow I — I still wanted to tell you. In the spirit of learning to want things properly, I suppose. I was looking for your name under mine all week. ”

“Your overconfidence is characteristic enough to rule out possession.”

“Please, I was one assignment away from taking your spot and you know it.”

“You still haven’t told me why.”

“Because I like it when your jaw clenches,” you say miserably, if everything is to come out now, “or your shoulders go taut. I like when you try to pretend I don’t get to you, and fail.”

“Why?” he breathes. It’s different from the last.

“Because it’s involuntary. You try so hard to be in control, and yet in this one thing, you can’t.”

“Can you?”

Of course you can; your will has been steel as long as you’ve had it. You could walk away now if you wanted. 

But you step forward, and Tom understands.

“Tell me you want to keep it, and I’ll let you," you whisper, and it comes out a bit jagged, like the line you're both treading. “But I’ll give you mine if you don’t.” 

He clenches his jaw. There's a second. An inch. His breath on your skin, still guarded, but with eyes flitting down to your lips.

“What do you want, Tom?”

There is a literal threshold now, your feet at the line of his doorway, and his hand slips from the frame as if by accident. You know better than that. The space is open to slink beside him, to cross the threshold, to take his silent offer. 

“Oh,” you inhale, mouth twitching not to smile, and his body is close enough now to relish the warmth of his hitching breath.  “I think I know.”

You hear it again when he kisses you.

The technicalities of a kiss are lost to it,  like he’s breathing life into you, and you’d think of it clinically because you’ve known it no other way — to succumb to a wave and wake up to new air blown from mouth to lung, the practiced rhythm of resuscitation — only this isn’t that. There’s no purpose to it but the feeling, sprawled under him and still standing, the door slammed shut, the clumsy brush of noses. You’re surrounded, solid at all sides. 

It's a good thing he's already dishevelled and in no position to complain if he wasn’t, because your fingers wind through the gaps between his buttons, the eager jumping of his pulse where you find his heart. That does nothing to save you, however — you entered this room pristine. Any mess made of you will inarguably be by his hands.

And a mess of you he does make.

“Tom," you sigh between kisses, and you feel his smile on your lips before you see it.

Tom. Not Riddle.

“What was that?”

“Shut up," you hiss, fingers (very deftly, you must say, for the way his hands are travelling down your back) prodding at the uppermost buttons to pop it free. It seems to be resisting. Fucking nuisance. You yank it clean off.

“You're a mess,” he tuts. 

He’s a mess. He's wild, half-unbuttoned and reckless, all of his careful restraint broken to splinters, and you’re kissing him like you’re starving, damn the whole thing.

But when have you felt like this? When have you been kissed like this? When have you wanted, simply, and had? Never.

“What are we doing?” you ask with a disbelieving laugh, like it’s only dawning on you now that you were raised not to do precisely this with men like him.

His answer is low in his throat, warm where his mouth drags down yours. “Don’t you know?”

“You always answer a question with a question.”

“You ask too many.” He glances up at you, and the look in his eyes is devastating. “Let me.”

It’s a request even if it isn’t spoken like one, so earnestly not Tom in its honesty that any reason urging you to deny him is lost to the satisfaction of a thing like that. Neither of you, who seem to know everything, know this.

You barely breathe a yes but he’s so close that it doesn’t matter. He hears you, he knows, and he’s mouthing along your collar while his fingers work on your buttons.

“You’ll have to tell me what you like,” he says at your chest, pressing kisses lower and lower. His teeth drag where he finds your leaping pulse. One of his hands slips your blouse off your shoulder.

“Will I?” you murmur dizzily, clasping a hand in his hair.

Goosebumps trail after his fingers, drifting along the swell of your breast. His smile presses against newly exposed skin. “Another question?”

The bra slips down and you’re half-bare before him, strangely uninhibited, warm with anticipation at what you’ve been taught to find terrifying, because Tom is too. Because he’s studying every inch of you as it’s revealed, as if you are something new to be learned as he wills himself to learn all else. This, you’ll let him best you in. This you will not argue.

He inches down, one knee on the floor before the other, and you can’t imagine that’s the way these things usually go — the positioning seems strange for what you know is meant to be done — but you keep your word. You card your fingers through his hair and watch as his gaze raises higher with every inch he sinks lower.

“You’re insatiable.”

He kisses your stomach. “For you.”

“For everything.”

“Mm.” He lifts your skirt around your waist. He nips your stockinged thigh. “For you.”

The intimacy of his gaze wracks through you, and you shudder, careening over him, hastily gripping his shoulder for purchase. Instinct bids you follow him down, but he stops you. Holds you still. And his hands trace the shape of your thighs to your hips, the elasticity of the stocking band tested when he hooks a finger beneath it and pulls. 

“Tom,” you say, as equally a warning as it is a demand.

You expect his chastisement, but he’s preoccupied, gazing at every stretch of you revealed as he tugs your stockings down. He’s half-knelt now like he’s posed to propose, and he abandons his pursuit momentarily for the buckle of your heels. Guides your foot to rest on his knee. Softly, slowly, slips the rest of your stocking free. Discarded, he kisses the bare skin of your ankle with his eyes still on you.

Context fills in the gaps of your inexperience as his lips trail higher. You pull gently at his hair, coaxing a little noise from him that makes you stutter. “What are you doing?”

Tom tilts his head. “Do you want me to stop?”

“I — No, I — it just isn’t what I… Where did you learn about this?”

His hands snake up the backs of your thighs, finding the last remnant of silk that separates you. “I didn’t.”

The implication is overwhelming. There’s no cause to draw, no attempt to master something read once but never tried, no game. He just wants you.

You nod at an unasked question, and the silk falls. Tom’s breath quickens. Flustered, heart pounding, you look up and away at anything but him — his stack of texts, an engraved chest, the emerald canopy of a bed far more appropriate for this. He digs into your hips for your attention. A breath of your name nearly sighed. You meet his waiting gaze.

“Look at me,” he says.

He leaves no time for you to flush and hide away from him. His fingers slide between your legs. There was a word you imagine meant to come out of your mouth but you can’t remember it. His name is all that you find.

And that he is unpractised in this doesn’t mean he doesn’t endeavour to learn, with every quickened breath, shudder, grasp of his hair, what you like. And you suppose he asked you to tell him, but he didn’t ask you how. He hears you well enough, a moan when he finally presses into you. There’s a moment to adjust, an overwhelm at the newness of it, and then you’re sighing like you could melt, held up by the desk behind you and his hand pressing into your hip.

His mouth follows quickly. You understand without any pretext that this is exactly what he wanted. 

“Tom, I —”

He does nothing but shush against you, his finger curling, his lips sinfully wet. You arch back, fumbling at the desk. It’s an effort you’re losing to remember to look at him, but his grip tightens when you stop, and he hasn’t stopped once — every time your head lulls back to him, he’s already looking. His eyes are half-lidded, blocked from all light but the warm silhouette of the candles behind him, and it chokes a gasp out of you. You think, in the haze of your desire, that you want to make him feel like this too.

And then the thought is gone with all your others. Another finger slides against you, works its way inside so softly, curls right beside the next one. He pulls away from you for a moment, teething the skin of your thigh, licking the mess he’s made. You’re shaking. You can’t look at him. You can’t, you can’t —

His breath fans over you for a second, tongue dragging, and you’re arched halfway onto the desk now, so he relents, pushes you up by the hips so you can sit, spreads you wider to accommodate him. It’s different. He’s deeper somehow. You whine into nothing, bucking against him. He throws one leg over his shoulders and you copy with the other.

“Please, I need —”

“I know.”

His voice is hoarse — you feel it as much as hear it — and faintly, impossibly, you catch a tone of restraint in it. There’s no restraint in what he’s doing to you. You can’t imagine what more he could possibly be withholding. But you slip a trembling leg from his shoulder and understand, hard between his legs where your foot just briefly brushes against him. You gasp as his motions stutter and you’re shoved back in place.

“Tom, you can — ah —”

Apparently not. He repositions you again and that’s all the answer you get, thighs wedged apart, fingers pulled free and digging wet into your hips to pin you there. You make a sound of protest at the emptiness, but it provides his mouth new access. It’s like he’s trying to consume every part of you he couldn’t already, and you want him to. You’ll let him. You understand with his tongue, drinking greedily from you: here’s the restraint gone. All of it. 

It breaks you. The crash gleams like a kaleidoscope, so dizzying to every sense that you can only hold onto him and pray. And you might be sighing brokenly through it, but your voice is gone to the feeling. Tom doesn’t stop for a second; if anything it spurs him on, and you are limp to all sensations, his notes spilled across the floor where you’ve been splayed on the desk for him.

You’re panting as you come down, and he’s suckling softly at the skin of your inner thighs again, hands rubbing soothing shapes above your knees. You look down at him. He still hasn’t looked away. 

“You’re…” You don’t have words for him. You fall back against the desk again.

“Mhm.” You’d mistake his patient mumble for something sweet if you didn’t know him any better.

“Maybe you should be a teacher.”

Tom breathes out a laugh, lips still trailing down, his reverence overwhelming. He doesn’t seem ready to part from this. You think you can convince him.

“All right, fine,” you say breathlessly, “help me up.”

He raises a brow.

“What? It’s my turn.”

[codegeassfacts]

Lelouch's Britannia History's course // From the DVD Magazine picture Drama // Canon Info about the Lore and crack settings.

Lelouch's Britannia's history course were short picture drama available as bonus within the Code Geass DVD, with Lelouch teaching Suzaku and co how the world of Code Geass came to life, when it comes to historical settings and the lore; It's very interesting if you are interested in how this uchrony eventually came to life.

The Origin of Britannia Part 1

Lelouch: So here’s the first session. Suzaku: You haven’t changed, Lelouch. I don’t think people will understand what this session is for. Lelouch: I don’t need those who don’t understand. You can only learn if you’re prepared to learn! Suzaku: I’m not sure about those Zero-influenced lines… Oh, but you were always easily influenced as a child. You used to imitate superheroes. Lelouch: Stop talking about something so long ago! Suzaku: But aren’t we talking about history today? We have to talk about long ago. Lelouch: Urgh… being a smart aleck? I’m leaving. Suzaku: Sorry, so sorry. I’m ready to learn, Professor Lelouch. Lelouch: Good. Then tell me. Do you know when Britannia was formed? Suzaku: Of course. This year is 2017 of the Imperial Calendar, so it was 2017 years ago. Lelouch: Wrong. Suzaku: What? But the Imperial Calendar — “a.t.b.” means “Ascension Throne Britannia,” meaning “the year Britannia assumed the throne,” right? Lelouch: It seems you did your homework. I’m impressed. Suzaku: It’s common knowledge. Besides, I was tested during the Honorary Britannian appointment. Lelouch: Then, the grounds of the ascension? Suzaku: Um… I think it was triggered when Julius Caesar tried to invade… Lelouch: That’s right. And one of the Celtic tribal kings who resisted is said to be the ancestor of the Britannian Royal Family. He gained freedom from Rome and was coronated — although it was more like becoming a chieftan — that year is the first year of the Imperial Calendar. Now, what’s the name of this king? Suzaku: Um……… I give up. Lelouch: Hey, Suzaku! You don’t have this simple information!? It’s on the next test! Suzaku: Well, I was busy, so… Lelouch: Then look it up by the next time we meet. Got it?

The Origin of Britannia Part 2

Lelouch: So Suzaku, I’m assuming you did your homework. Suzaku: Of course, Lelouch. Here. Lelouch: Alwin I, eh? Yes, you’re correct. You pass! Suzaku: But people won’t understand what we’re talking about just from this! Lelouch: I, Lelouch, order you. If you want to know, buy the first volume of the DVD! Suzaku: You’re so easily influenced. Anyway… Alwin I is known to be the ancestor of the Britannian Royal Family. He gained freedom from Rome and became the first chieftan, and that year is the year Britannia was formed. I’m right, aren’t I? Lelouch: For now, yes. Then can you tell me who was the Emperor of Rome at the time? Suzaku: … I give up. Lelouch: It was Augustus. Remember that. Now, this Alwin I is only a figure from a legend and there is no proof that he existed. The history of the Empire, the “Britannia Chronology,” indicates that he really existed, but this chronology was created when the Holy Empire of Britannia was founded. So when they founded the empire is when they stuck on the legacy of the Royal Family’s blood as an afterthought to assure their ascension. It’s common in kingship and imperialism. Suzaku: So when am I supposed to recognize when Britannia was founded? Lelouch: I guess you can regard Britannia’s beginnings to be when the descendents of the Tudor family line who went to the New World ended and the Duke of Britannia started the imperial regime. The Imperial Calendar was established then too. It extended back in history and set the first year as a thousand and a couple hundred years ago. Suzaku: I see. Lelouch: Now, do you know when that year was? And who was the emperor who was coronated? Suzaku: Imperial Calendar 1813. The Emperor was Ricardo van Britannia I. Lelouch: Correct. It looks like you studied hard. Suzaku: Yeah. Cecile helped me too. Lelouch: Cecile? Who’s that? Suzaku: My superior of the department I’m in. Lelouch: A woman, eh? You’re good at debauching as always. Suzaku: Debauch… that’s not true! Lelouch: You were always good at getting older women to like you. Suzaku: I’m not doing it on purpose! Besides, why are you bringing up the past like that? Lelouch: Huh? You said it first. That we’re discussing “history.” Suzaku: Urgh…

**I didn't find the videos for the other History Lessons so you'll just have the translation from now on **

The Virgin Queen Elizabeth

Milly: What are you two doing? Suzaku: Oh, hello. I’m learing Britannian history from Lelouch. Milly: I see. But if it’s history, you should ask me. You know that my character’s description is “has a great knowledge in history and will cooly observe the changing world with Zero’s presence.” Lelouch: That description is way old. There’s no hint of it anywhere. Milly: Oh, Lelouch. You are so cheeky. Don’t you agree? Suzaku: Uh, um… I can’t say much there (sweat). Milly: Oh well. Even without that in my description, I’m good at history. The Ashford family has nobility in its line, after all. Lelouch: Formerly, you mean. Milly: Oh, shush. Whose fault do you think that is? Lelouch: Urgh… (sweating heavily). Well, anyway. It’s a good opportunity to ask the president if you have any questions, Suzaku. Suzaku: Let’s see… then can you tell me about the era of absolute monarchism — about the Elizabeth I from the Tudor dynasty? She’s called the Virgin Queen, but isn’t it weird that she has a chld? Milly: That names comes from the fact that she was single for her whole life. There’s her famous line, “I have already joined myself in marriage to a husband — my country.” Suzaku: But she has a kid. Was it Henry IX? Milly: Yes. Bluntly speaking, it was an illegitimate child. Elizabeth I didn’t marry, but she had many lovers. The Earl of Leicester, Earl of Essex and the Duke of Britannia are among the possible fathers. She switched between lovers all of her life. I’m a little jealous. Lelouch: So she was an Amazon. Like someone we know. Milly: What was that, Lelouch? What are you trying to say? Suzaku: I think he meant that you are similar to Elizabeth I. Lelouch: Hey, Suzaku, shut up! You idiot! Milly: I see. By the way, Vice President, did you finish the documents I asked for? Lelouch: No, I’ve been busy lately… I’ll have it done by tomorrow’s deadline. Milly: I changed my mind. I want it now. Lelouch: That’s high-handed, President! Milly: Call me Queen!

Sakuradite and the Age of Exploration

Suzaku: Unh… Shirley: What’s wrong, Suzaku? Are you constipated? Suzaku: Yeah, I feel so bloated… Hey, what are you making me say, Shirley? Shirley: Hee hee. I’ve been hanging around the President too long. But I’m surprised that you could kid around like that. Suzaku: Lelouch trains me well, doesn’t he? Shirley: You guys are really close… I’m so jealous. So, why were you groaning? Suzaku: This. “In (a)’s ‘Description of the World,’ he describes a country known as Jipang, meaning Japan, and that it is a golden island. But it is foolish to think that this country was rich in gold; rather, it was rich in (b). At the time in Europe, research that was inspired by © led to the discovery of an energy source but there was not enough of it, and this hindered the progress. (a)’s 'Discovery of the World’ moved the people to explore the world and eventually led to the discovery of the former United States, currently the conquered territory of Britannia.” Shirley: Let’s see… “Fill in the blanks. If you can.” What is this? Why does this worksheet sound so condescending? Suzaku: Lelouch made it. All of his worksheets are like this. Shirley: Oh, Lulu… (laugh) So the answer to “a” is “Marco Polo,” b is “Sakuradite,” and c is “alchemy.” Suzaku: Wow, you’re good in history! Shirley: No, I’m ot. But I’m good with minerals and geosciences. My father is a geologist. He works in the bureau and he goes around investigating geological conditions. Suzaku: I see… Shirley: But this worksheet really shows Lulu’s personality. Suzaku: Yeah, but I wish… it would show a little more love. Shirley: What are you talking about? It shows a ton of love! Lulu would never do this for anyone he didn’t care for. I’m really jealous now. Suzaku: Why don’t you tell him that you like him? Shirley: Well… huh!? How do you know that I… Suzaku: It’s actually quite obvious. I think the only one who doesn’t know is Lelouch. Shirley: I’ll tell him myself eventually! So please don’t tell him. Promise? Suzaku: Of course. Shirley: Thanks!

The Rebellion of Washington

Lelouch: ~~ ♪ C.C.: You’re in an awfully good mood. Humming, eh? Lelouch: !! Oh, I didn’t know you were there, C.C. C.C.: Why are you so flustered? … Huh? What’s that? Lelouch: It’s none of your buisness. C.C.: Let’s see… “Write the reason why the Rebellion of Washington in the Colonies ended in failure in 1770 a.t.b. in 1,200 words.” Is this homework? But it’s odd that you’re making the worksheet… Lelouch: It’s for Suzaku. Just go away! C.C.: The Rebellion of Washington… that was a long time ago. It’s easy. It’s because Ben betrayed the Continental Congress. Lelouch: Ben? C.C.: Oh, sorry, I mean Benjamin Franklin. Lelouch: Why can’t you just call him the Earl of Franklin? Yes, it’s true that Franklin went to France to ask Louis XVI to support their independence and failed. But that’s not the main reason they lost, is it? C.C.: Well, Louis was willing to help. But when Ben went to France, he met the Duke of Britannia. And he was offered a title and some land in the Colonies, and fell for it. Ben is the type who prefers research to war… he was a kind man. No, too kind. If Ben had asked Louis for support, Louis would’ve given them an army and the Continental Army wouldn’t have lost in Yorktown. And George — I mean, Washington — wouldn’t have died and America wouldn’t have become territorialized. Lelouch: The Duke of Britannia was involved!? That’s not in any of the history materials! C.C.: But it’s the truth. Lelouch: … You talk as if you saw it happen. Could you have possibly…!? C.C.: I’m C.C. I know everything. For example, I can name the song you were just humming. Lelouch: !!!!! C.C.: Was it from 8 years ago? The special effects fighting show that aired on Sunday mornings in Japan. Lelouch: Okay! I got it! Shut up! Sheesh, you’re such a… C.C.: You’re still naive, Lelouch. You can’t beat me in a thousand years. Lelouch: Do you mean figuratively? C.C.: Hee hee. Who knows?

The Humiliation at Edinburgh Lelouch: Good. Good. Damn. Good. Suzaku: Lelouch, can you stop correcting my worksheet out loud? Lelouch: No. Suzaku: Why not!? Lelouch: It’s fun watching your reaction when you get something wrong. Suzaku: Lelouch, you’re a sadist. Lelouch: Okay, 85%. You did pretty good. Suzaku: Because I have a good teacher. Lelouch: Hmph. Flattery won’t get you anything! Suzaku: I’m not flattering you. I really think so. Thanks, Lelouch. Lelouch: … Anyway, today’s session… Suzaku: Um, we’re at the end of the 1700s, when the citizens were starting a revolution. Lelouch: That’s right. Ahem. At the end of the 1700s, all of Europe was facing rebellions that were triggered by the French Revolution. That was when Napoleon started gaining power, was crowned, and had a hold on almost all of Europe. He looked to expand to the British Isles, won the Battle of Trafalgar and held naval supremacy. He then took his 120,000 men and landed on British soil and thereafter advanced to London. The queen at that time, Elizabeth III, was chased to Edinburgh where she was captured by the citizens who supported Napoleon. She was forced to abolish the monarchy in a.t.b. 1807, which is known as the… Suzaku: “Humiliation at Edinburgh.” Lelouch: Right. And the one who saved the queen is Ricardo van Britannia, the man who eventually founded the Britannia Empire. Suzaku: So his existence was important to history. Lelouch: Not so fast. That’s why you’re so naive. You forgot an important person. He will later be featured in many novels, plays and movies: Ricardo’s right-hand man and best friend, and the strongest knight. He was the head of the Knights of the Round, the “Knight of One” — Sir Richart Hector. Suzaku: Oh! I think I’ve heard of him! I think I saw the movie, too. Lelouch: Then there’s no problem. Without Richart, the escape from Edinburgh to the New World wouldn’t have happened. Suzaku: I see… Lelouch: Then next we’ll talk about the founding of the Britannia Empire. Make sure to study! Suzaku: Yes, Professor Lelouch.

The Formation of Britannia Nunnally: Oh, I didn’t know you were here. Suzaku: Yeah. Lelouch was teaching me. Nunnally: When you’re done, would you like to have dinner with us? They’re preparing it now. Suzaku: Thanks, I’d love to. Lelouch: Then Suzaku, we’ll move on to the formation of Britannia. Did you study for this? Suzaku: Leave it to me. So Elizabeth III and the aristocrats who followed her went to the New World and set up a capital on the East Coast. They started conquering America, but Elizabeth III died without leaving an heir. Lelouch: Yeah. And normally they would choose one from among the relatives, but Elizabeth appointed her lover, Ricardo van Britannia I, as the heir on her deathbed. And that is how the Holy Empire of Britannia came to be. Suzaku: It’s an unbelievable story. She’s known as the “Queen who lived an eventful life for love,” right? She might’ve been nice as a lady, but I’m doubtful about her as a ruler. Lelouch: Woah! Stop, Suzaku! Suzaku: Huh? Nunnally: I see… you don’t like Elizabeth III? You don’t think she had what it took to be a ruler? Suzaku: Huh? What’s going on? Why do I feel so cornered? Nunnally: I see… Excuse me, I must go. Suzaku: What happened? Did I say something? Lelouch: Nunnally is a fan of Elizabeth III. When she was younger, she read a highly innacurate story that depicted her as a tragic queen. Suzaku: Oh, I see. I’m sorry. I didn’t know. Lelouch: Well, it’s not anything new that you can’t read the atmosphere. I’m glad you didn’t bring up the theory that she assassinated Napoleon, because the damage would’ve been even more severe. Suzaku: You mean, the theory that Napoleon died on his way back to France after the loss at Waterloo because of poison in his food put in by Elizabeth’s men? Lelouch: Yeah. “I will never forget this humiliation.” It’s a famous quote from her last testament. Nunnally: Lelouch! Suzaku! Dinner is ready. Lelouch: !! Oh, thanks, Nunnally. That was quick. Nunnally: I helped a little, that’s why. Suzaku: Thanks. I thought you’d be mad. Nunnally: Of course not. It was I who invited you. “I will never forget.” Suzaku:/Lelouch: …!!! Nunnally: Please, eat up!

Arrival of the Black Ships Lelouch: So the democratic revolutions continued and the aristocrats from all over Europe, especially France, advocated the release of slaves and the war that started in the southern states became the Civil War. Any questions? Suzaku: None, I get it. Oh? I hear a knock. Come in! Kallen: Oh, Suzaku, Lelouch. What are you two doing? Suzaku: I’m having Lelouch teach me history. Lelouch: That’s right. So if you don’t need anything, you’re in the way. Get out. Suzaku: You don’t have to kick her out. I don’t mind. Come on, let’s continue. Lelouch: Sheesh, you’re too nice. Fine, let’s continue. Britannia worked on stabilizing the country while also looking at foreign opportunities, especially in the Pacific. And finally in 1853 they crossed the Pacific and arrived in Japan. Japan had an isolationist policy and realized that they’d fallen behind the rest of the world. “The denkisen awakens the Pacific slumber; just four cups and we cannot fall asleep.” Are you familiar with this? Suzaku: Of course. I’m Japanese. Lelouch: Oh yeah. Well, it’s obvious but this is a haiku describing the black ships of Britannia arriving at Japan. Suzaku:/Kallen: …! Lelouch: What’s wrong? Suzaku: Oh… just continue, Lelouch. Lelouch: …? Fine. So the denkisen refers to the Britannian ships with outer rings that were operated with electric motors. It must be a phonetic equivalent. They should’ve written it with the kanji for “electric boats,” but since Japan didn’t have the technology for electricity, they used different kanji… Suzaku:/Kallen: … Lelouch: Okay, if you gusy have something you want to say, just say it! Kallen: You’re wrong, Lelouch. That’s not a haiku but a parodied tanka. Lelouch: …!! It’s something similar! Kallen: No, it’s not. And the denkisen actually refers to the expensive tea that was loaded on the boat. Green tea has a lot of caffeine, so the four cups making people not fall asleep is referring to the fact that a commotion was made with just four ships. Lelouch: What!? Is that true, Suzaku!? Suzaku: Umm. Sorry, Lelouch. Kallen is right. Lelouch: Urgh! Kallen: I’m sorry, Lelouch. You were enjoying your rolse as a professor, but I guess I ruined your day. Lelouch: Shut up, you. Perry ship!!

Occupation of Japan

Lelouch: So this is the last session. Suzaku: You’re as abrupt as usual. But isn’t this a bad place to end this? Lelouch: What are you talking about? This is just as I planned. I can’t talk about the a.t.b. 1900s because it’s related to the main plot. I’ve been told not to say anything. Suzaku: Really? But this is the last DVD volume, isn’t it? Lelouch: Urgh! It’s the end but not the end! Anyway, here’s the last session! We’re going to skip to a.t.b. 2010!! Suzaku: You don’t have to yell. Oh, 2010 is the year we first met. Lelouch: Yeah. At that time Japan took advantage of how the Chinese Federation and Britannia were on hostile terms and stayed neutral. They used the sakuradite card, manipulated the distribution, and created a three-way standoff between the Chinese Federation, the EU, and Britannia to enjoy economic prosperity. Suzaku: And no one thought that Britannia would break the balance using military force. Lelouch: That’s right. The common assumption in international relations at the time was that it was taboo to attack Japan. Because once a fire started, all the other factions would follow suit and a full-scale war would break out. But the one who broke the rule… Suzaku: … Was Charles zi Britannia. The 98th emperor of the Holy Empire of Britannia. And your father. Lelouch: That man’s preparations were complete. As a blindside he sent all of the Knights of the Round to Africa and Inda, and the flagship ship, the Great Britannia, to the Indian Ocean; and while others were looking away from the Pacific he seized Japan quickly. The situation was practically decided in the first 24 hours, and by the time the Chinese Federation and EU tried to act, it was too late. And what happened after that… is not necessary to say, I guess. Suzaku: Yeah, you’re right. Lelouch: Now starting tomorrow, I’ll talk about the history of other countries. Don’t forget to study. Suzaku: Huh!? But you said this is the last session. Lelouch: It’s over as in what’s going to be in the DVD booklets. Your class will continue. We’re starting with the Chinese Federation. Suzaku: Why the Chinese Federation? Lelouch: “It’s not the end of the story” is a hint. Suzaku: Sigh… I guess there’s much more… Lelouch: Are you unhappy with that!? After all that I went through to teach you!? Suzaku: No, I’m very grateful, Professor. Lelouch: Very well. Then that’s the end of today’s session!

Translation Curtesy of Celiss Galvea

Hope you enjoyed.

[angstylittleb1tch]

Who am I, to you? (Aether x creator!reader)

Summary: It is an imposter sagau universe where creator!reader escapes from her acolytes to the far corners of Sumeru and decides to start a flower shop but an unexpected guest comes for a visit...

Note: This is my very First Fic EVER. I do admit I'm no master at writing but I'm trying to learn and am open to criticism so please don't hesitate to correct me in my pronunciation, grammar, spelling or knowledge on any mentioned topic. Thanks!

Warnings: Yandere? (If you squint), mentions of swords, vines used as binding equipment (not bdsm you lil shits)

Pt 2

The sky today was just as beautiful as it was every day. Granted it never really changed due to teyvat basically just being zero's and one's but no one but you knew about that so better not to mention it.

Previous to your 'decent' into teyvat, you were just like any other gacha gamer who stumbled upon Genshin by accident and became addicted to it in a short span of time. Naturally, that had let you to explore more about this fandom which had eventually landed you to the sagau corner of Genshin fanfics which is why being teleported or rather isekai'd to teyvat wasn't a very shocking experience.

However, you weren't just going to walk into Mondstadt like the other fanfics, no. You were much calmer and more grounded not to mention clever. Never once were the acolytes alerted of your presence in teyvat as you slowly over the span of a few months made your way to Sumeru, making sure to stay hidden for days on end and to take all the longer but less active routes.

In your first week in Sumeru, you had found out that the traveler had yet to cross paths with the dendro archon and was still in Inazuma, so you had a general idea of where in the timeline you were.

Since you had no family or even proof of birth or existence in teyvat, finding a job was increasingly difficult along with keeping your identity hidden. However, as if you were blessed by some all-knowing power, higher than gods, you encountered an old yet very kind lady who allowed you to live with her at the outskirts of Sumeru so long as you helped her run her little flower shop.

Months passed in the blink of an eye, and you found yourself growing soft towards the lady you grew to see as your own grandmother. She insisted you call her that and you happily obliged. Your trust and love towards her grew so much so that eventually you decided to tell her the truth about your origins and status of creator in this world.

Though shocked at first, she never treated you any differently than before, and appeared to be more understanding of your situation. Both of you lived your life in happiness, away from the world. However due to being cut off from the world you were late to know that the traveler had successfully taken care of the Shouki no Kami and saved Sumeru from the scheming Akademiya.

Neither did you have any idea about how frivolously Aether had been turning teyvat upside down trying to look for you.

Unlike the other acolytes, Aether held a deeper connection with you, the creator. He was the first one you guided and the first to get to know your aura. There was absolutely no way he wouldn't find out about your arrival to teyvat. It was honestly better the others didn't. Imagine if everyone knew the creator was just walking amongst the common folk. That would certainly cause a panic amongst everyone.

He had to find you before the others did. He had to know. He had to see your face in person. One he had seen through the illusion of the sky way too many times before. One he had grown to love.

Yes, Aether was indeed in love with you. He had fallen not too long ago but he had fallen far. How couldn't he? You were just perfect in every way conceivable. Your eyes? Absolutely beautiful, he could have one glance and an eternity would have passed for him. Your smile? Mesmerizing. Oh, what he wouldn't give just to see a glimpse of it. He was sure he'd slay even the mightiest of gods, even Celestia, if it meant he'd be rewarded with one of your smiles.

It was entirely safe to say that when he'd gotten wind that there was a flower shop located at the ends of Sumeru said to house flowers no one had ever seen before, he was beyond intrigued. Especially since some poor soul he saw in Sumeru city had the same flower his sister always wore in her hair just laying around, claiming he bought it from your shop.

Now he just had to figure out what kind of a person would sell such a rare and practically impossible flower to get your hands on so freely. So, without thought, he soon found himself Infront of your little flower shop in the middle of nowhere with his eyes set straight at the door.

He could definitely feel your presence, it was everywhere. The plants, the flowers, the animals and even the air itself felt.... purified. It had to be your work. There was no doubt about it. Even Paimon didn't say a word for once in her life. She was too curious and perhaps a little uneasy at what kind of a deity she was to face now.

Unlike Paimon however, Aether could barely contain himself enough to stand. After a while of trying to gather courage to step in, he finally opened the door and was greeted by a view equivalent to the Fields of Elysium.

The sun rays fell through the windows lighting up the place, vast arrays of flowers were laid bare anywhere the eye could reach, wisteria flowers were hung from the ceiling as if they were growing from the skies above.

Never once before had Aether truly felt at home anywhere before more than here.

"I'll be there in just a second!" A sweet voice called out to him breaking him from his trance. It was you; you were talking to him. Addressing him. Before he could fully fathom what was to happen, you came out from the back of the store finally giving him a full view of your face.

"Hello there, how can I be of help today?" You greeted him.

Despite keeping up your calm, aloof and cheerful persona, you were panicking inside. Never once did you think you would meet him today. Him. Aether. Of course, you knew who he was. If his bright blonde hair wasn't a dead giveaway, then the floating ball of joy next to him definitely shouted out his identity to you.

You wanted to shout, to scream, to go up and crush Aether in a bone wrenching hug. You wanted to tell him how sorry you were for not being able to help him on his journey to find his sister. You wanted to hold him and take all his pain away. You wanted to tell him that you would be there for him.

That you Loved him. That you Love him.

Alas you couldn't, because there was no way in the entirety of teyvat that he would be able to let a stranger do that.

That's all you were to him of course. He didn't know you. There was no way he would. No one knew who you were, otherwise, you wouldn't be alive in this shop right now.

"Uhm hello?" You asked him, finally getting out of your own thoughts and noticing that he had been silent the whole time.

As if something snapped by your words, Aether finally came to his senses and responded,

"Ah! Yes! Oh, hi hello ahem I'm totally not staring."

You chuckled at his nervousness. "Never said you were."

If Aether's cheeks and ears weren't red earlier, they definitely were now. Your laugh was so pretty. He could never get enough of it.

"So, are you looking for any specific flowers? We have tons of variety; some I can assure you've never seen before! If you need, I can recommend you if you're buying for a specific occasion or I could just show you some general-" You smiled as you talked on and rambled about the flowers and Aether wasn't even sure if he was listening.

You looked absolutely ethereal, and Aether was so sure he was in heaven right now or somewhere close to it because archons were you beautiful. Even the Archon of Love would be jealous of your allure.

It's as if you were an enchantress, and in all honestly Aether wouldn't mind if you were, all because of the look you were giving him right now. He was already in cloud 9.

"-and so, I would definitely recommend the peonies. Hey? Are you even listening?"

"Hmm? Oh! Yes of course, Peonies, right? I'll take a bouquet."

"Alright just a moment, by the way, you never told me how you got here? I mean this place is pretty off the map, quite hard to stumble by it."

You knew exactly what you were doing, there was no way Aether just stumbled upon your shop out of nowhere. It was too out of character for him. Was there a reason he came here? Did he know?

"Oh, uhm I was uh recommended! Yes, I saw another traveler I came across in Sumeru own a rather unique flower, so I asked him where he got it, and he told me it was from your shop so here I am."

"I see, what flower was it? If you liked it so much, I could give you a few, consider it on the house."

"Are you sure? It's completely fine, I'll pay for them."

"No, it's alright, you can have them for free, don't worry about it. So which one was it?"

"Ahem, well it's the 'Inteyvat'"

"Oh. That flower.... I see you have an eye for flowers huh."

"Not really, it just... holds sentimental value. How about you, how'd you come across it?"

"Ah well you see, the seeds were given to me by my grandma, i suppose it's a family heirloom."

Both of you knew that neither of you told the entire truth however addressing it would cause a LOT of explanation, one you just weren't ready for, not before your coffee at least.

"So, what did you say your name was again?"

"Why? Are you trying to take me out on a date?"

"Would you say yes if I were?"

"Paimon will pay for the food!"

I guess everyone's a little bold today.

"I'm sorry did I hear that right? You? Paimon? The one who has less mora than Zhongli? Will pay for my date? That is only possible if we're going on a date in my dreams."

"WHY YOU-! Fine! Paimon won't be paying for your food then since you're such a big meanie to Paimon. And excuse you- Paimon isn't broke ok! Infact Paimon is richer than the traveler!"

"Paimon, how many times have I told you, those 'primogems' of yours are not actual currency."

"AGH-! Paimon's had it with you today! First you make Paimon fly the whole way here without telling why and now you're making fun of Paimon! That's it, Paimon is going to tattle to xiangling about how you actually threw away the Black-Back Perch Stew she made for you and only pretended to eat it because you were so full from Sara's cooking!"

You watched stifling your giggles as Aether's Face dropped into a terrified expression.

"NO! I'm sorry Paimon, please don't tell xiangling about that, she will murder me if she finds out. You don't want me dying.... do you?"

"Hmph"

"Please Paimon I'm begging you I don't want to die so young! I'll never make fun of you again! I'll even stop calling you emergency food so please! Anything but xiangling's wrath...."

You just couldn't hold it in anymore. If anything, Aether's pleading added to your amusement, and you burst in a fit of laughs.

Aether had almost forgotten you were here. His gaze turned to you and a smile creeped up his face which soon turned into and embarrassed look as he realized you had front row seats to his predicament.

"Hey! It's not that funny y/n! I'm serious! Stop making fun of me- Oh just great now Paimon's laughing too!" Though Aether was seeming to be embarrassed he was happy he could make you laugh like that.

That was until your smile disappeared from your face as you registered what he said.

"I never told you my name."

Both Aether and Paimon looked at each other as the atmosphere took a turn for the worse. There was no humor in your voice and your face looked cold, completely contradicting your laughs and smiles earlier.

"I- Please let me expla-"

Just as Aether took a single step in your direction vines sprung at him, securing him in his place as they wrapped around him. Paimon tried to pry them off but to no avail. He looked back up towards you but all he saw was a pure black sword pointing at his throat and a dark look in your eyes.

"Who am I, to you."

Well, that went well. I think? I'm still trying to figure out how I want to end this fic but I'm not completely clueless. I will be making a nice lil happy ending though. Anyways if you have any suggestions on how you want this fic to end then I'm open to them. Gosh Writing is hard, my respect for authors just skyrocketed.

Also, just a reminder that THIS IS MY FIRST FIC so please be nice and generous in your criticism otherwise if you don't like it them you can fuck skedaddle right off, Thank you very much.

Anyways, I'm gonna go sleep now It's like 2 am rn and I have to go on a trip in like a day so yeah, until I decide to post the next part fellow beings.

Signing off.

Also, PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT IM BEGGING YOU I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS WORK IS EQIVALENT OF SHIT OR IF ITS ACTUALLY DECENT.

[someoneoffthestreet]

Randomly thinking about The Truman Show at 3 AM (as one does) and I’ve really zeroed in on the moment at the very end, where Truman’s boat hits the wall. Because- this is a movie I’ve grown up with, and I’ve found that, as I age, there are things I didn’t really understand as a child, even if I liked the movie or whatever in question, but age just let’s me understand things I didn’t give much thought to when I was younger, whether out of lack of interest or simple inability to understand.

Anyway.

The moment Truman hits the wall, is the moment the show is well and truly over, because that’s when it becomes actually real for him. The reality of his life, made tangible. I can imagine- for all the evidence Truman had compiled about his life, all the weirdness he’d witnessed and all the pieces he’d put together, there still must have been a small kernel of doubt. Some little seed that still believed the lie that was his life. And then. The wall. The perfectly painted horizon, right there for his fingers to touch. Proof. Something that he couldn’t be ushered away from, or explained away. The wall of his world, of his cage.

And that was the moment it was all over. Because the whole conceit of The Truman Show the reality show lay in Truman’s ignorance. That was the whole point! The point was that Truman was a real person in a sea of actors, and with Truman’s knowledge of the situation, he just became another actor. Christof wanted to shove the cat back in the bag, for things to go back to how it was, but you can’t. It’s done. It’s over.

In reality, there was no way Truman wasn’t going to walk through that door, because there would be no point not to.

[cyberstudious]

A Beginner's Guide to Learning Cybersecurity

I created this post for the Studyblr Masterpost Jam, check out the tag for more cool masterposts from folks in the studyblr community!

(Side note: this post is aimed towards the technical side of security, rather than the governance/management side, because the tech stuff is what I'm familiar with.)

Where do I start?

Cybersecurity is a specialization of general tech & therefore builds on some concepts that you'll need to know before you can dive deep into security. It's good to have a background in and understand:

how computers & operating systems work

how to use Linux

computer networking & basic protocols

If you're serious about learning cybersecurity, it can be helpful to look at certifications. Even if you don't want to get certified or take the exam (they can get expensive), they provide you with a list of topics that you can use to guide your self-study. And if you want to find a job, a certification is practically required for getting your foot in the door.

I personally recommend the CompTIA series of certifications, because they're well-recognized and I think they expose you to a good breadth and depth of material to get you started. Start with the A+ certification if you have zero tech background. Start with the Network+ certification if you've never taken a networking course. Once you get your basic computer and networking knowledge down, then you can jump into security. The Security+ is a good starting point.

Do I need to know how to code?

No, but it would be really really helpful. You don't have to be a skilled software engineer, but understanding the basics and being able to write small scripts will give you a solid foundation.

From Daniel Miessler's post How to Build a Cybersecurity Career:

You can get a job without being a programmer. You can even get a good job. And you can even get promoted to management. But you won’t ever hit the elite levels of infosec if you cannot build things. Websites. Tools. Proofs of concept. Etc. If you can’t code, you’ll always be dependent on those who can.

How do I gain skills?

Play Capture the Flag (CTF) games.

Stay up to date with security news via an RSS reader, podcasts, or whatever works for you. Research terms that you're unfamiliar with.

Watch conference talks that get uploaded to YouTube.

Spin up a VM to practice working with tools and experiment on your own computer.

There are lots of brilliant, generous people in cybersecurity who share their knowledge and advice for free. Find their blogs, podcasts, and YouTube channels. Look for local meetups in your area.

I'm still relatively new to the field, but I have a general knowledge of lots of different things, so feel free to send me an ask and I can probably help point you to some resources. We're all in this together!

Previous Cybersecurity Masterposts

An Introduction to Cybersecurity

Cybersecurity Book Masterpost

Free Cybersecurity Learning Resources Masterpost

Masterpost of Study Tips for Cybersecurity

Cybersecurity Tools Masterpost

Thank you so much to everyone who participated in the #StudyblrMasterpostJam this week! It was wonderful to see what other studyblr folks are passionate about. The jam technically ends today but there are no official rules, so if you've been thinking about writing a masterpost, this is your sign!

[backjustforberena]

Hi! Do you still accept writing prompts?

If you do, I have two: firstly, Rhaenys and Corlys’ gossip girl/the muppets moment, people-watching at the table in S1x05 (should be fun).

Secondly, in S2x04, IF EVER Corlys was able to bid farewell to Rhaenys as she prepares for Rook’s Rest, what would their conversation be like?

I love to know your take on these, but no pressure though.🙂

Listen, I am having a really, quite momentously, crap day (crap week, even) so you just gave me an excuse to rewatch that sequence and go full nerd. Thank you for that. Because if you give me a prompt (though I reserve the right to not follow through because if I write something I even remotely dislike then I am so sorry, it will never be published) like this, I am going to make sure it is canon compliant and that means clocking every single time they are on screen.

It's quite interesting, that specific scene, to consider from a POV because the audience is so aware and knowledgeable about everything and is seeing and hearing everything, but, of course, our characters are not. So it's fun to think about what they may assume or what they may not clock or what they might not read into or understand or even care about.

I do have a couple of "headcanons" that I apply to this scene, just from my understanding of Corlys and Rhaenys, and a couple of thoughts from rewatching it all again, so I'm going to jot them down for you to either interact with (omg please do) or for me to just come back to when I write this sequence:

In the original script (potentially still canon), Daemon is invited at the behest of Corlys. They know full-well that he's going to show up. My feeling is that Corlys is happy and Rhaenys is happy enough. It's not objectionable to her to cause a fuss by inviting Daemon. She's just hoping he behaves.

Rhaenys and Corlys have absolutely ZERO context for the green dress. Sorry, Alicent, but they don't. They haven't even got a diddly squat that you've changed your fashion sense because neither of them have been at court for the past three years. All she looks is late. Rhaenys and Corlys don't know about the strife over the succession, the details that led to Otto's dismissal, Cole's confession. Any of it. Rhaenys and Corlys do exchange a look before Alicent takes a seat. So, my take on this is that they put it down to a show of defiance purely over Otto's dismissal. It makes a point, but that's it. Not necessarily symptomatic of anything else. It's a snub to Viserys.

I think this leads into any observations they may have about Alicent speaking to her Hightower kin - it's just her ire at losing her father. Which, fair enough. Corlys is also looking at Viserys during his speech at an occasion when Rhaenys is not so that could be a fun little gossip.

Rhaenys taught Laenor that dance and Corlys saying "I thought he did very well" is a by-product sort of compliment. She did good teaching their kid. Do I have proof? No.

I think Corlys and Rhaenys have a nice time at the feast. I know, I know, shocking! Given the amount of crap happening and how tense it is and the bombs waiting to explode in every corner, I think they actually have a grand old time. Because they are oblivious to most of it. But also because every time you look at them, they seem very relaxed, once the dancing starts. They're chatting and eating and drinking.

I like to think that Rhaenys (who was the most wary of the match - though never against it per se) is happy. She's seeing her son happy with the match and even if it's not ideal, it's good to see. Everyone around her is merry and together and that's all she wants.

I don't think they can hear anything going on on that dancefloor. No Joffrey and Laenor, Laena and Daemon, Rhaenyra and Laenor, Daemon and Rhaenyra. None of it. So if they do look that way, then we're going off body language. And that's only if they can actually see well enough for that - like Viserys couldn't quite make out Daemon holding Rhaenyra's face.

Nothing is alarming until the riot, bar a slight discomfort over Laenor and Joffrey being so close (we cut to Rhaenys looking a bit serious). And what freaks them both out during the riot is they cannot see their kids whatsoever. IDK where the hell Laena goes by the end as we don't come back to her (ha, ha, headcanon time!) but Rhaenys and Corlys don't see Laenor from the start of the riot until people move out of the way and he starts screaming.

So, yeah, that's how I would start exploring something like that. And then you'd just have to think up topics and reactions to each beat even if it means missing them entirely. We don't cut to them at all during Gerald Royce's appearance, so maybe they didn't hear or see. It's all quite fun! I may give that a shot, even if I haven't got a single clue how long the evening takes (we've got at least one little time jump).

BUT onto the second part of your ask which is "IF EVER Corlys was able to bid farewell to Rhaenys as she prepares for Rook’s Rest, what would their conversation be like" - jeez, Louise, I don't know. Honestly, I wish I did. I'm still baffled that we got so small an interaction before she left (I mean, I get it but come on).

Now, normally, I'd be okay jut shooting the breeze and making something up or having a gut feeling but my issue is this: I'm not entirely sure what the dynamic is between Corlys and Rhaenys at this point. Because it's NOT what we see in the confrontation about Alyn. That doesn't remain: Corlys makes some teensy reparation by supporting her and showing up, they are there for at least a day or two, there's no sense of animosity or a particular disconnect in those council scenes or before she leaves.

But, of course, it can't be the same as always. Because the stakes have changed. Because they have had Alyn and Addam's existence spoken aloud, landing between them, and they are still a little bit fragile as a marriage. Not to mention she's off to war which is just massive in and of itself - it's earthquake stuff for Rhaenys personally. So I can't decide what would propel a conversation. The only thing that I sort of hold onto it something in the BTS book:

'Corlys backs her decision, albeit reluctantly. Toussaint notes, "No one stops Rhaenys from doing what she wants to do."'

So, I think that whatever that conversation was - if there was a conversation, it would be Rhaenys steering it. I don't think Corlys would ask her to change her mind. I don't even think he'd perhaps ask her to be careful. Because, at the end of the day, and not in a nasty way, his wishes won't do anything. In an interview, Steve said:

"[...] the fact is, he knew she was going to do something dangerous and he couldn't stop her."

[7-oh-ta1]

I actually feel rage when people call totk a 10/10. Like YES I enjoyed totk..... but that's because I ALSO enjoyed botw, and totk is a mimic of botw. Totk didn't just use the same world as botw, it added absolutely nothing interesting to the modern Hyrule. To me, THAT was important to botw. It meant nothing to totk. Zero world integrity. To the npcs I have come to know. THAT is not 10/10. That alone cranks it down to 9/10 without even considering the boring plot, the lackluster dungeons, the reuse of shrines as well as all other botw mechanics, and any new lore completely destroys anything actually interesting that may have been happening, all of which moves it down to 5/10 for me. But wait... everything I like about totk is in botw. 2/10.

But the tiniest criticism that is symbolic of everything wrong with totk.... is the continuation of botw's world. For the hundredth time I will cite Celessa, my favorite botw npc.

Celessa is a pilgrim who views Princess Zelda as something of a paragon. She's currently on a pilgrimage to the Spring of Wisdom when Link meets her and gives lots of interesting worldbuilding about the spring, Zelda, and how the modern Hyrule views her. Celessa offers the perspective that Zelda, who may or may not be dead at this point in the story, is someone incredibly powerful and that some people have a nearly religious faith that she's protecting them even if they have no proof of it. Celessa's information that Zelda was said to have visited the Spring of Wisdom also gives Link incentive to locate it in order to find one of his memories.

My criticism with Celessa is that, like every npc, she never actually makes it to the Spring of Wisdom. She will be on her pilgrimage infinitely. I wanted to see her keep going, I really liked her character motivations and wanted to see where she would go next. Totk, as a SEQUEL that took several years to develop whilst reusing botw's map, had every opportunity to continue the story of Celessa and the other interesting npcs. I imagined Celessa could have visited all three springs at that point. I imagined her as something of a caretaker of the Spring of Wisdom, as someone who could see the dragons, someone spiritually knowledgeable. Bringing what she believes as an important, sacred place back into the modern eye. Maybe she could have an organization spread to all three springs, caring for and bringing these springs back to life and out of the shadows. But I would take just Celessa living on that mountain. Or maybe, as a teacher in Hateno (the central of modern Hyrule's hylians that Celessa is very familiar with) educating people on the Sacred Springs and WHY those locations are sacred.

So what is pilgrim Celessa up to in totk?

Celessa is a tourist in Hateno Village, doning full mushroom garb. She acts like she's never been there before everyday. She travels with two other unrelated npcs she never met in botw. She has a passion for fashion and adores CeCe's mushroom designs. Everyday she and her new friends travel to each of Hateno's tourist traps.

And that's it. There's no legacy, there's no callback, there's no continuation of Celessa's story. It's just her name on a character because they wanted an npc to do that thing and she just happened to be the one to do it. It has nothing to do with Celessa. And she's just my example! This is how they treated Hyrule. We enjoyed Hyrule in botw because the worldbuilding, understanding the scars the Great Calamity left on it, but the communities that continue despite, despite, despite. Botw was special it was presenting an entirely new Hyrule to us with new npcs filling it. Totk has no such connection to the world. It's disrespectful.

Imagine, gentlemen, that in the Dragonborn DLC of Skyrim, every npc on Solstheim was exactly the same. No new towns or houses, no terrain changes, all the npcs are named the same. But for some reason, Carnius Magius is a humble, kind fisherman. That doesn't make any sense -- he's a cold hearted businessman that wants to kill his employees over minor infractions. No information is given to the player about why he has changed. With absolutely no mention to his past, he's now a soft spoken, helpful fisherman. This would confuse and trouble people who care about the world of TES, which at least unlike TLOZ the majority of fans actually do care about the integrity of the games.

This is such a small thing. As a sequel, continuing the stories of the world. Could they really not manage to do that? If it's such a tiny thing people don't care about, why do I care about it? And if it's tiny, why couldn't they manage it? There's so many examples of the disrespect to botw's Hyrule that totk now uses like a playground for its stupid fucking g mod mechanics. But still, people give it 10/10? 10/10?!!!!!!! I'm going to start biting people.

[trippinsorrows]

This is me talking with absolutely zero context or knowledge but! You said Colton has always loved the farm and animals, and I feel that's so... peaceful? So I imagine Lina as the Tribal Chief and that hectic life, and she just come home to her husband? To the mansion/farm? When she can be herself with him?

Idk it's giving Roman coming home to Solana 😭

Again, I have no proof of this but it's the vibe I'm getting

you'd be 100% correct, friend. i still have asks i need to answer, some of which are about the whole lina/colton thing, but ya'll know me. i love layers and parallels.

the same way roman was patient and good to solana, helping her with her mental health is similair to how rashad is with leya, especially with patient and understanding regarding her ocd, which definitely impacts her pregnancy and motherhood.

the dynamic with colton and lina is that they are each other's safe spaces. such different circumstances where he spent his life feeling unwanted and unloved, lina has never known as such but feels pressure to fill her father's shoes. she carries a weight she doesn't have to have when she's with him. she can just be catalina. the same way roman can just be roman with sol.

[lucksea]

THE ZERO RAMBLES

just found this post from last july in my drafts and i was like u know what... i think its time to take it out of the microwave. nothing impactful is here but i figure i should post proof from 6 months ago of the fact that zero makes me insane

PART 1: HIS ISSUES

i talk about this all the time but its because it drives me nuts. you cannot just banish a 16 year old to a hell planet, put him in training weight-power armor, and have him fight one guy over and over for an undetermined but clearly extended amount of time, presumably with very few breaks, and then have GOD show up once hes like 20 and tell him that hes the messiah of his species, that the guy who banished him was actually his father (?!) who is dying, and zero needs to go fight Space Satan to save him, only to have said father die in his arms, so then zero kills space satan like 2 times, and goes to multiple other universes, and talks to A DIFFERENT GOD, and dies like twice, and gets a bunch of crazy powers- you cant have all of that happen to one singular guy and just expect me to believe that he was normal about it all. HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHY HE WAS BANISHED UNTIL HE WAS ALLOWED TO LEAVE. IT WAS STATED THAT NOBODY TOLD HIM WHY TOUCHING THE PLASMA SPARK WAS BAD UNTIL HE PASSED HIS TEST. NOBODY WAS TELLING ZERO ANYTHINGGGGGGG IN HIS ENTIRE LIFE!!!!!! in the same fucking movie that he shows up in we see ultra babies and children, which means that zero was BORN (from a tube apparently). WHAT DO YOU MEAN he didnt know seven was his dad. he seemed to have some knowledge or relationship with seven beyond knowing him as a leader figure. how did he not know. where is zeros other parent. why do we not know literally anything about them other than that they were possibly blue and presumably a woman. if zeros other parent isnt in the picture to the point of never even being MENTIONED, and zero had no idea seven was HIS LITERAL DAD, WHO THE FUCK RAISED HIM??? no wonder he tried to touch the plasma spark! the guy could have been an orphan for all we know! we dont know ANYTHING about his childhood except that his dad for some reason didnt claim him, and instead just watched over him from a distance! (I HAVE MY OWN OPINION ON THOSE IMPLICATIONS FOR SEVEN but that is another post)

so with all that being said. i think that Cool Guy Persona he puts on his at the very least halfway fake. and his attempts at being normal are transparent to me. i know he is not normal. i know he has problems.

PART 2: THE RAMIFICATIONS

when we first see zero, 45 minutes into his debut film, hes nothing like the character he eventually is known as. hes ANGRY and EXHAUSTED, understandably so. there are a few moments, if i remember correctly, where he gives some kind of snarky comment to Leo- something like "ill definitely get you this time!"- but lets be honest, even when youre a creature that lives forever, if youre trapped in a sandstorm for a thousand years you have to learn to think positive or else youre gonna go insane. even when he saves the tiny pigmon, his kindness is colored by a sense of resignation. his voice is quiet and ragged. the way he tells the pigmon to run implies that he doesnt even think Leo will stop, as if he believes Leo would let the pigmon get injured (which i really dont think is true). this is another implication that zero was probably not given breaks during this "training". if he thinks Leo wouldn't stop in his attacks to spare the life of a tiny creature, why would he assume Leo would stop because Zero was getting tired? we dont know whether this assumption was actually proven right, or if that's just what zero believed from the moment he got there, and he never gave Leo the chance to prove otherwise. We do know that Leo is very intense due to his own training from Seven. I doubt he ever went easy on zero

then, after zero spares the pigmon, seven's slugger crashes onto the planet and ultraman king reveals the backstory zeros been missing. belial tried to steal the spark, seven is his dad, etc etc. so zero ventures off to defeat the bad guy. not even given the chance to recover from being STUCK IN A SANDSTORM FOR LIKE A THOUSAND YEARS. (it might have been 900 since his wiki says hes 5,900 and i think he was 5,000 when he was banished i dont remember for sure. thats still a crazy long time. 900 years in a sandstorm fighting some guy is a lot) so he goes off and meets his dad as his dad for the first time, only for said dad to die in his arms. seven ends up being fine, because this is ultraman and they never die, but zero doesnt have meta awareness (yet..?!), he doesnt know that, so he thinks his dad just straight up died 3 minutes into them being a family. thats something abt zero that fascinated me kind of instantly, having watched his special after watching all of geed. the movie states that zero defeats belial for the good of the universe, and im sure that that was partly why, but it is also SO clearly a personal vendetta. belial was the first person to try to steal the plasma spark. belial is why zero was banished. belial killed zero's dad. zero beats the shit out of belial, and presumably kills him, because he's finally found someone to blame for everything that's gone wrong with his life. there could have been justice, but it was mostly rage. he kills belial out of a desire for vindication. and it is only after this that zero starts acting Cool. its mostly in revenge of belial that he starts actually doing that, and my friend damien pointed out something i found interesting while we've been watching geed together (i'm rewatching it, it's his first ultraman show).

zero has a certain semi-arrogant, semi-suave personality that he carries with him, and the aforementioned cool guy/mature mentor persona that he puts on when he's talking to riku. and if being a cool mentor or a suave hero doesn't solve a situation, zero IMMEDIATELY falls into Hyper-Aware Warrior Mode. this was pointed out to me during the scene near the beginning of Geed, where Fukuhide Kei is displaying his master plan at the press conference. with hindsight it strikes me a bit odd that Zero, who seems to care so much about how other people perceive him, would be so like idk unphased by the crowd. hes almost like a robot in a sense, he's furious in a cold sort of way at Kei, and he doesn't seem to care about the people watching. he holds back from initiating a fight only because he knows that's what Kei wants, and he knows that the people in the building could get hurt if a fight broke out. But it's weird to see Zero, who is so dramatic he's practically a showman, behave in such a way, isn't it? this is why i think the drama is falsified in order to make himself more approachable. if i spent a considerable amount of my life the way zero did, i would probably also find it very important to make sure people don't want to leave me again. it seems very understandable, that he would create a persona befitting of The Universe's Protagonist. he already has so many expectations placed on him, so what's one more? but here, in the press conference scene, we see a more honest part of him. he's a little older, sure, he's smarter, but i think he's still very angry. i think there's still a part of him that remembers thinking his only way out is to fight.

but outside of, and sometimes inside of combat, he doesnt really show that side of him. he has an audience to perform for. and perform he does- have you SEEN that guy fight? he poses as much as he attacks. honestly he's posing pretty much constantly. posing while brooding. posing after showing up to change the course of a fight. posing languidly on a rock for some reason while his friends argue (i love you ufz). this also makes the moments where he drops the poses and enters that, like, Default Stance more fascinating to me. there's a level of Get Serious where he enters heroic protagonist that can do anything mode, and also a level of Get Serious where he shuts up and locks in

PART 3: THE IMPACT OF COMPANIONSHIP

one of the best parts of revenge of belial (and i guess killer the beatstar to a lesser extent) was that it gave zero a cast of friends to bounce off of. its fun to see another way he gets to shine outside of his Protagonist Aura- the way he jokes and fights with his friends feels more genuine than a lot of his dialogue with other characters. he forms a pretty real bond with Mirror Knight, Glenfire and Jean-Bot that feels valuable to him. but i think that value itself also pushes him to perform. now, he has something to lose. that can be terrifying for a guy who's lost everything like twice already.

its literally 1 in the morning as im writing this bc i laid in the dark for an hour and couldnt sleep and then spent an hour getting this far so i cant phrase this as good as i want to, but i think part of the sort of Frat Energy the zero defense force has is zero experiencing what its like to have friends his age who are similar to him and becoming quietly but deeply, whats the word, determined? to not let that go. hes both so adamant on doing everything himself and so pleased to have people around him. hes been made into a spectacle and hes fully embraced it. he's The Hero. The Hero is cool and handsome and suave and powerful, so he must be all of these things too, right? again, expectations. maybe he even genuinely enjoys it. i'm sure it must be nice on some level to be The Hero, with everyone singing your praise and depending on you. the weight of it must also be crushing, though. Zero is a member of a species notoriously seen as gods in-universe to their own chagrin (Shin Ultraman touches on this best, but i think its acknowledged in some way in most shows that Ultraman may be strong, but he is far from an invincible god). but not only is he a member of, he is in some ways THE Ultraman, even moreso than the one they all call that. Zero is the only one who can traverse multiverses at will, who carries the power of Noa, who can CONTROL TIME WHENEVER HE WANTS (and at the cost of his physical form, which is crazy, the way he got those powers even moreso, holy shit). i wouldnt say that zero is a direct Jesus figure because his story doesnt really match the concept of a biblical figure at all except for fighting belial, but he is definitely a more general messiah figure to me. hes lived and died for the Ultra cause multiple times. he patrols the multiverse with his buddies to ensure peace. but he never really stays in one place

yet another issue i think he definitely has... Commitment... i think, even if all the other members of the zero defense force were to go back to their homes or find new ones, zero would still be roaming around by himself. we only see him on the Land of Light for like, maybe 15 minutes total across his two movies. at the end of Mega Monster Battle Galaxy, there is a shot that shows almost painfully clear how distant he feels from the rest of his kind- at the end, before he and seven unite, when a small crowd walks around him and Zero watches, unmoving, unacknowledged. he watches parents with a new baby walk by him, doting over their child. he watches friends race past, rejoicing. and zero is alone.

the thing is, that desert planet was definitely not his home, but i dont think the land of light is either. even after they welcomed him back, he feels out of place, maybe even unwanted. he doesnt belong there. he belongs out, in space, literally. in space as in between places, where he is nothing more than a concept to all of the people who know him. there is an image in their minds of who he is meant to be, and he has no interest in changing that image, so he's the most content when he can be nothing else. even when seven, who seems to talk to him with a sort of gentleness that is genuine, tells him how proud he is of zero, how zero will never be alone- theres still an expectation of greatness. a shadow cast over them both. (that land of light in general seems to cast such a fascinating shadow dont you think?)

i, the viewer, and perhaps you who may be reading this one day, know that Ultraman is a story about compassion and harmony, and most importantly, love. ultraman loves the universe, and all the people in it, regardless of their ability. i think Seven loves Zero no matter what. but i dont think Zero knows that. i dont think anybody has ever made it clear to him that he could be worth something inherently, without trying.

and all of these things are reasons why i need to rip him apart with my teeth

[raybittechnologies]

DeepSeek-R1: A New Era in AI Reasoning

A Chinese AI lab that has continuously been known to bring in groundbreaking innovations is what the world of artificial intelligence sees with DeepSeek. Having already tasted recent success with its free and open-source model, DeepSeek-V3, the lab now comes out with DeepSeek-R1, which is a super-strong reasoning LLM. While it’s an extremely good model in performance, the same reason which sets DeepSeek-R1 apart from other models in the AI landscape is the one which brings down its cost: it’s really cheap and accessible.

What is DeepSeek-R1?

DeepSeek-R1 is the next-generation AI model, created specifically to take on complex reasoning tasks. The model uses a mixture-of-experts architecture and possesses human-like problem-solving capabilities. Its capabilities are rivaled by the OpenAI o1 model, which is impressive in mathematics, coding, and general knowledge, among other things. The sole highlight of the proposed model is its development approach. Unlike existing models, which rely upon supervised fine-tuning alone, DeepSeek-R1 applies reinforcement learning from the outset. Its base version, DeepSeek-R1-Zero, was fully trained with RL. This helps in removing the extensive need of labeled data for such models and allows it to develop abilities like the following:

Self-verification: The ability to cross-check its own produced output with correctness.

Reflection: Learnings and improvements by its mistakes

Chain-of-thought (CoT) reasoning: Logical as well as Efficient solution of the multi-step problem

This proof-of-concept shows that end-to-end RL only is enough for achieving the rational capabilities of reasoning in AI.

Performance Benchmarks

DeepSeek-R1 has successfully demonstrated its superiority in multiple benchmarks, and at times even better than the others: 1. Mathematics

AIME 2024: Scored 79.8% (Pass@1) similar to the OpenAI o1.

MATH-500: Got a whopping 93% accuracy; it was one of the benchmarks that set new standards for solving mathematical problems.

2.Coding

Codeforces Benchmark: Rank in the 96.3rd percentile of the human participants with expert-level coding abilities.

3. General Knowledge

MMLU: Accurate at 90.8%, demonstrating expertise in general knowledge.

GPQA Diamond: Obtained 71.5% success rate, topping the list on complex question answering.

4.Writing and Question-Answering

AlpacaEval 2.0: Accrued 87.6% win, indicating sophisticated ability to comprehend and answer questions.

Use Cases of DeepSeek-R1

The multifaceted use of DeepSeek-R1 in the different sectors and fields includes: 1. Education and Tutoring With the ability of DeepSeek-R1 to solve problems with great reasoning skills, it can be utilized for educational sites and tutoring software. DeepSeek-R1 will assist the students in solving tough mathematical and logical problems for a better learning process. 2. Software Development Its strong performance in coding benchmarks makes the model a robust code generation assistant in debugging and optimization tasks. It can save time for developers while maximizing productivity. 3. Research and Academia DeepSeek-R1 shines in long-context understanding and question answering. The model will prove to be helpful for researchers and academics for analysis, testing of hypotheses, and literature review. 4.Model Development DeepSeek-R1 helps to generate high-quality reasoning data that helps in developing the smaller distilled models. The distilled models have more advanced reasoning capabilities but are less computationally intensive, thereby creating opportunities for smaller organizations with more limited resources.

Revolutionary Training Pipeline

DeepSeek, one of the innovations of this structured and efficient training pipeline, includes the following: 1.Two RL Stages These stages are focused on improved reasoning patterns and aligning the model’s outputs with human preferences. 2. Two SFT Stages These are the basic reasoning and non-reasoning capabilities. The model is so versatile and well-rounded.

This approach makes DeepSeek-R1 outperform existing models, especially in reason-based tasks, while still being cost-effective.

Open Source: Democratizing AI

As a commitment to collaboration and transparency, DeepSeek has made DeepSeek-R1 open source. Researchers and developers can thus look at, modify, or deploy the model for their needs. Moreover, the APIs help make it easier for the incorporation into any application.

Why DeepSeek-R1 is a Game-Changer

DeepSeek-R1 is more than just an AI model; it’s a step forward in the development of AI reasoning. It offers performance, cost-effectiveness, and scalability to change the world and democratize access to advanced AI tools. As a coding assistant for developers, a reliable tutoring tool for educators, or a powerful analytical tool for researchers, DeepSeek-R1 is for everyone. DeepSeek-R1, with its pioneering approach and remarkable results, has set a new standard for AI innovation in the pursuit of a more intelligent and accessible future.

[senjutsunade]

If you hate paperwork so much why did you become hokage?

Oh, fun question! I have a good pile of headcanons on this topic, so I'll answer this ooc;

Tsunade whines about paperwork—a lot. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t get it done. Most of the manga/anime scenes show her desk cleared, the work handled, and her office tidier than my own (cough). Sure, she whines about it, but that’s just her way of venting.

But why is she good at it? Because she’s a nerd, and people tend to forget that. Nerds have a knack for paperwork, and she’s no exception.

As to if/why Tsunade is a nerd?

She loves research. It’s what made her the legendary medic she is. If you pay close attention to the manga/anime (like I do - little things matter, kay!?!) , she’s often skimming through books or flipping through archives. Her appreciation for the Nara clan’s research on herbs and medicine, especially during her efforts to help Chouji after the Sasuke Retrieval arc, only reinforces this. And then there are all those scenes of her poring over tomes in preparation for Rock Lee’s surgery—proof that her dedication to knowledge runs deep.

One of my headcanons (note to self: actually write this down) is that Tsunade had access to some of Tobirama’s scrolls—the less forbidden ones, anyway—and these piqued her interest in cellular regeneration, which later became the basis for Creation Rebirth.

I also headcanon that after leaving Konoha, she spent years tracking down Uzumaki fuinjutsu scrolls and books. She’s built a decent collection of them in her personal library, and it’s one of the assets that helped her develop Creation Rebirth and the Strength of a Hundred seal.

So…. Why the Complaints?

Just because she loves research and discovering new techniques doesn’t mean she enjoys all paperwork.

Not even nerds would enjoy going through endless D and C rank mission reports when those idiot gennin don't know how to write and their reports always have suspicious stains on them. Those reports are disgusting. She'd go to any length to not touch one.

She hates budgeting with a passion. And the council? Either they don’t understand basic arithmetic or they just enjoy making her life difficult. The financial reports they demand are redundant and tediously detailed, and she’d rather face an army of rogue shinobi than deal with them.

Political Jargon - Despises it. Tsunade is a “hit first, ask questions later” type. She has zero patience for wading through political doublespeak. She’s good at it—she can read between the lines when needed—but that doesn’t mean she likes it.

Also, she's just spoiled. She never wanted responsibility - which is why she never took on a gennin team. She always wanted to do her own thing but now she is responsible for a whole fucking village so of course the princess is going to at last throw some temper tantrums.

[ktaminfo]

Keys to the Digital Future

The digital future is not merely a continuation of today’s technological trends; it is a transformative landscape where innovation, connectivity, and sustainability intertwine to redefine how we live, work, and interact. As we step into this exciting future, understanding its essential components can empower individuals, businesses, and societies to thrive. Here are the key elements shaping the digital future:

Artificial Intelligence (AI) and Machine Learning (ML)

AI and ML are at the forefront of the digital transformation. These technologies are driving advancements in automation, data analysis, and decision-making. From personalized recommendations to autonomous vehicles, AI’s capabilities are reshaping industries. The future lies in ethical AI development, ensuring these tools enhance human lives while minimizing biases and risks.

The Internet of Things (IoT)

The IoT connects devices, systems, and people, creating an ecosystem of interconnectivity. Smart homes, wearables, and industrial IoT solutions are just the beginning. As 5G and edge computing mature, IoT’s potential to streamline operations and improve efficiency will expand exponentially, transforming everything from healthcare to urban planning.

3. Sustainable Technologies

The digital future must align with global sustainability goals. Renewable energy, energy-efficient data centers, and green computing practices are essential for reducing the environmental footprint of technology. The circular economy, which emphasizes recycling and repurposing electronic waste, will play a significant role in creating a sustainable digital ecosystem.

Cybersecurity and Privacy

As technology evolves, so do the threats associated with it. Cybersecurity is a cornerstone of the digital future, requiring robust frameworks to protect data and infrastructure. Privacy-centric technologies, such as blockchain and zero-knowledge proofs, offer innovative ways to safeguard user data and build trust in digital systems.

Digital Inclusion and Accessibility

A truly transformative digital future is one that is inclusive and accessible to all. Bridging the digital divide requires investments in infrastructure, affordable devices, and digital literacy programs. Technologies must be designed with accessibility in mind, ensuring equitable opportunities for everyone, regardless of location, ability, or socioeconomic status.

Quantum Computing

Quantum computing has the potential to solve problems that are currently beyond the reach of classical computers. By leveraging quantum mechanics, these machines can revolutionize fields such as cryptography, drug discovery, and climate modeling. While still in its infancy, quantum computing is a critical component of the digital frontier.

The Metaverse and Virtual Realities

The metaverse represents the convergence of physical and digital realities. Virtual and augmented reality technologies are enabling new ways of interaction, education, and entertainment. Businesses are leveraging these immersive environments for training, product design, and customer engagement, laying the foundation for a blended digital-physical world.

Ethical Leadership in Technology

The digital future demands leaders who prioritize ethics and societal well-being. From addressing algorithmic biases to ensuring responsible AI deployment, ethical leadership is crucial for fostering innovation that aligns with human values. Transparency, accountability, and collaboration will be key to navigating complex ethical challenges.

Education and Lifelong Learning

As technology evolves, so must our skills. The future workforce will require adaptability and continuous learning to keep pace with new tools and paradigms. Education systems must evolve to emphasize digital literacy, critical thinking, and collaboration, preparing individuals for the demands of a rapidly changing digital landscape.

Global Collaboration

The digital future is a global endeavor, requiring collaboration across borders, industries, and disciplines. Shared goals, such as mitigating climate change and advancing healthcare, necessitate partnerships that leverage collective expertise and resources. International cooperation will ensure that technological advancements benefit humanity as a whole.

The keys to the digital future lie in innovation, inclusivity, and sustainability. By embracing these principles and addressing the challenges they present, we can unlock unprecedented opportunities for growth and prosperity. As we navigate this dynamic journey, the digital future promises to be a realm of endless possibilities, limited only by our imagination and commitment to shaping it responsibly.

[navyismycolor]

I dont think its THAT complex

There is an odd conception in psychology that "the human mind is SO UTTERLY complex that it is not possible to give any advice".

Personally I think that is both untrue and unhelpful.

Firstly, yes the human mind is very complex. But so are a lot of other things. Launching rockets to Mars is complex. Figuring out how to build a bridge that will last a century is complex. Designing a giant piece of software that will connect you to the rest of the world is complex. Bear in mind that there is no objective measure of complexity in these fields. It is really not possible to say with definitive certainty that building a nuclear submarine is more complex than fine tuning a lithography machine. So, there is no objective evidence that the human mind is, in fact, infinitely more complex. It is just a vague notion we like to project, perhaps because we dont understand it well. Lack of knowledge is not proof of complexity.

It also does not help to say "every mind is different, nothing works from one to another". Every complex problem in the world is different. When you cook the same recipe on two different days it is bound to be different. When I play a game of chess online that goes beyond 20 moves, it is bound to be a game that has never happened in the history of humanity before. And most directly, no two human bodies are different but that doesnt mean medical doctors throw up their arms saying they cant do anything about anybody. The whole point of science is to find generalizable patterns that do infact apply from one to another.

Believing that human minds are infinitely complex and infinitely different from each other is a great impediment towards actually being able to help someone through the despair & doldrums of mental health. It would lead therapists to never saying anything substantial, claiming that the situation is so unique, so novel, so persnalized, that nothing helpful can be done about this. I am firmly of the opinion that while listening and having someone who listens is valuable, eventually everyone wants a solution to their personal situations and a way out of the mess than just an idle audience.

In my view, one of two things are possible.

Either, you accept that human minds are extremely complex and there is no generalization that allows you to help one person through their distress by reusing previously seen patterns. If that is so, then we have to accept that psychology is not a science (since there is zero generalization), and psychotherapy should not be a valid paid profession (since there is nothing someone can say to help work a way out of a problem).

Or, you have to tone down the catastrophization and recognize that like many difficult problems, the human mind is also a difficult proposition that runs into difficult problems from time to time. And therefore, it should be possible, through trial and error, through discussion and deliberation, through realization and replanning, to find a way through and out of the problem.

What do you believe in?

[jbfly46]

The Sonora Aeroclub: A Lost Legacy of Anti-Gravity, Secret Societies, and Suppressed Technology?

Could it be that the secrets of anti-gravity were discovered long before the age of rockets and jets? Hidden deep in the California hills in the mid-1800s, a group called the Sonora Aeroclub emerged, gathering under a cloak of secrecy and experimentation. Fuelled by dreams of harnessing unconventional energy sources, these aeronautic pioneers reportedly designed and even tested aircraft that seemed far ahead of their time.

But why haven’t you heard about them?

A Secret Society with a Visionary Mission:

The Sonora Aeroclub wasn’t just a ragtag group of tinkerers—they were part of a larger movement, allegedly linked to a German secret society known as the Nyctameron. Driven by a mysterious figure named Karl Honig, the Aeroclub met in secret workshops where they sketched and assembled highly advanced airships.

Their designs featured strange propulsion systems they called “NB gas,” a form of anti-gravitational energy that, by their account, could defy Earth’s pull without the need for massive engines or fossil fuels.

These weren’t just ideas on paper. Sketches and manuscripts uncovered years later by researcher Charles A. Dellschau reveal elaborate blueprints for these crafts, some resembling modern stealth designs and drones, drawn nearly 150 years ago. Why would a hidden society in a remote gold-mining town design advanced flying machines? And more importantly, how could they know about propulsion concepts that our mainstream science has only recently begun to entertain?

The Curious Case of “NB Gas” and Anti-Gravity:

One of the most intriguing elements of the Aeroclub’s designs was their purported use of “NB gas.” This mysterious substance, claimed by the Sonora Aeroclub members to have anti-gravity properties, was key to their aviation experiments. Today’s alternative energy community will recognise this as one of the earliest recorded theories of “buoyancy control” and anti-gravitational force—concepts the mainstream still struggles to explain.

Could “NB gas” have been an early understanding of zero-point energy? Or perhaps even a rudimentary form of electromagnetic lift technology? These are questions that modern physicists and researchers ask as they reexamine the Sonora Aeroclub’s work. Some believe that if such a breakthrough were indeed discovered, it would have posed a direct threat to fossil fuel industries and conventional aircraft manufacturers—a threat that powerful interests might have wanted to bury.

Dellschau’s Hidden Messages: Proof of Suppressed Technology?

One of the few remaining clues to the Aeroclub’s existence and innovations lies in the cryptic, annotated artwork of Charles Dellschau. Decades after the Sonora Aeroclub allegedly disbanded, Dellschau created a collection of heavily illustrated, code-filled journals that documented their experimental airships in exquisite detail. Filled with esoteric symbols, encrypted notations, and bizarre engineering notes, Dellschau’s work has led many to believe he was hiding something monumental in plain sight.

Researchers who have studied Dellschau’s journals suggest that the Nyctameron and the Sonora Aeroclub may have been part of a broader network seeking to develop technology that could one day free humanity from conventional energy constraints. If true, it’s no wonder that these journals remained obscure for decades—who stands to gain from the suppression of anti-gravity and alternative propulsion technologies?

Why Haven’t We Heard About This?

It’s a question that leaves room for intrigue. Some believe the Sonora Aeroclub’s anti-gravity experiments were intentionally buried by powerful industrial and government interests. The sudden disappearance of the Aeroclub, the lack of public record on their achievements, and the coded nature of Dellschau’s journals suggest that whatever knowledge they possessed was either hidden—or taken.

Did the Sonora Aeroclub Discover Anti-Gravity?

Today, the legend of the Sonora Aeroclub fascinates the alternative propulsion and energy community. Could they have stumbled upon anti-gravity principles that remain elusive even now? Or were they silenced before they could transform the world?

As breakthroughs in aerospace technology inch closer to the concepts the Aeroclub imagined, people are asking: Did we lose a key to a cleaner, faster future somewhere in California’s backwoods? Dellschau’s cryptic journals, filled with strange symbols and forgotten blueprints, may still hold answers. And perhaps, if we look closely, we’ll find a glimpse of the secrets they tried to leave behind.

[lord-squiggletits]

Hi! Hope it's not a bother to ask, but since you seem highly well-versed in IDW Megop... have you (or anyone) made a kind of Megop-focused comic timeline or a chronological rec list for what comics to read if you want to get into IDW Megop? Sorry if there's one already out there that I'm missing. I'm new to the Transformers franchise (haven't even ever watched the Bay movies) and I've chaotically been watching different things, but what I've read and seen of IDW Megop seems fascinating.

Your Pay Unto Evil was one of the first fics I got recommended for getting into the ship, actually. I read that with zero knowledge of any kind of Transformers canon and it made me cry at 4 AM after I couldn't put it down, so just... many thanks for writing and sharing all your amazing work!

No, not me nor any of my mutuals have made a timeline for IDW MegOP. If you're interested in it though, I'd definitely start with Chaos Theory + Police Action (The Transformers 2009 issues #22-23) as that's literally Peak IDW MegOP Being Gay Old Men for each other. It was also literally the first thing I read of IDW1 myself, hahaha.

And then to get more IDW MegOP, I would recommend just...reading more of the comics? Because the thing about IDW MOP is that it's not like, say, TFP where Megatron and Optimus interact frequently and get a lot of cool teamup/fanservice/etc moments together. IDW MOP is the kind of MOP where they get a few key moments together, and the rest of their chemistry just comes from...... the way they think about each other when they're apart, the way that each other's actions as leaders/people affect the trajectory of each other's lives, the respect and easy casualness they have with each other despite their position as enemies. There aren't really many "ship" moments like "oh, they have this conversation together that's super gay" except for Chaos Theory, rather it's a ship where you have to read between the lines a little and observe the way they interact with each other/talk about each other to see the chemistry they have together. And in order to understand the significance of those interactions/thoughts/reminders between each other, you have to actually read the story as a whole and understand the things that contextualize IDW Megatron and Optimus' close orbiting of each other.

As pretentious as this sounds, IDW MegOP isn't the kind of ship where you can point at a few moments in canon and go "here's proof they're gay for each other/have romantic chemistry," it's more like a bunch of reading between the lines and thinking about their histories together and coming to the conclusion that these guys are so fucking intertwined together.

And that's really one of the main appeals of IDW MegOP to me; it's that, tragically, they never really GOT chances to interact with each other as people and mostly existed as diametrically opposed military/political leaders. They have parallel character arcs that involve rising as heros, falling into villainy/moral grayness, and coming back up into some semblance of goodness. They share a lot of the same grief about the pointlessness of the war and the way they're individually, uniquely responsible for things getting as bad as they did.

Their personalities and struggles are similar enough that they're basically two sides of the same coin, where you see a few of the same core values (desire for justice/equality, passion, anger, keeping emotional distance from others) and it makes you go "IDW Megatron and Optimus are basically the same guy, just put in two completely different life situations and fucked up by what happened to them and the shitty messages they got from their mentor figures." And in the end it creates this really tragic version of MegOP where you feel like they COULD have been great together, if the trajectories of their lives and their fatal flaws hadn't conspired to separate and pit them against each other at virtually every turn.

It's not something that I could really recommend specific series or issues to you, it's just an overall vibe that IDW MegOP has. That being said, I and my mutual @quetzalpapalotl have a lot of good posts about IDW Megatron, IDW Optimus, and IDW MegOP (mostly she has the good posts, I just babble shit on my blog and post fan fiction) that could possibly intrigue you into reading specific series?