#WHAT DO I EVEN TAG THIS AS AGHHH

[ayatoscupid]

the camellia forms ripples on still waters

xueyato (xue yin (oc) x ayato) | 5k words | pre-established, retrospective, no warnings

note: xue yin is not a self-insert, but an oc (and a rom f/o!). he's ayato's secretary, and an adeptus. intro post to him here!

a/n: a look into how xueyato's relationship develops, set during preparations for irodori festival. this is the first work i ever wrote for this pair, and months later i still love it. so i hope you enjoy! also there's a part 2 that i'll post eventually lol. :p

Xue Yin emerges from his quarters just as the sun peeks between the clouds, making the flowers outside the Kamisato estate glisten with morning dew. It had been raining all night, though nothing like the rolling thunder and pelter of rain he's become used to during his stay in Inazuma. Rather, it was a light shower that served as background music to help Xue Yin sleep better after his eventful and eye-opening week. He had spent the past couple of days with the traveller from beyond, urging them to accompany him during festival preparations. What started off as a friendly hangout turned into a somewhat catharsis from his long withheld yearning. His yearning to come back home, to see his sister again.

It embarrassed him to let his emotions out, to say the least. He had only intended to show the traveller the ropes of the trade, to teach them a couple of things they could take on their journey. How to negotiate, how to persuade and reel their bait in. But the traveller was so kind and earnest when they had told him what they wished for at Amakane Island that he couldn't help but open up his heart a little, letting them catch a glimpse of his longing under the everblooming cherry blossom trees.

"I'm sure she misses you too," the traveller had signed, smile sincere, "And she would want to know how you've been."

"Yeah!" Paimon agreed, giving a vigorous nod of her own. "And now that the borders are opening up, maybe you can visit again!"

Xue Yin had finally come to the conclusion back at the Yashiro estate that he might return home, once the festivities have wrapped up. That even though it scared him to face Liyue after all the changes it's gone through without him, nothing will make him happier than seeing it again.

"Will you miss Inazuma?" The traveller asked, and the question made Xue Yin go quiet, staring out into the ocean to contemplate. With all the emotions running through his head just from that simple question, his answer was obvious.

"More than anything."

——————————

"Ah, Xue Yin."

Xue Yin smiles when he opens the doors, unsurprised to see Ayato already awake, tending to the papers at his desk. From the looks of it—the slight ruffle of his hair, the faintest of dark circles under his eyes, the way he's fiddling with his pen—he probably only slept for a couple of hours. While to any other onlooker, Ayato looks as pristine as ever, Xue Yin isn't just anyone. From the eight years he's worked with the Kamisato clan, Ayato in particular, he knows him like the back of his hand.

"Good morning, my lord." He says, bowing his head in greeting. "It'll be sunny out today, despite the rain that fell last night. You should be safe to go between meetings without an umbrella, but I advise you to take care walking around puddles. …And to take an umbrella nonetheless. Don't worry, I'll remind you in case you forget again."

Ayato laughs goodnaturedly, and anyone would think nothing of it—maybe they'd indulge in it a little, the lightness in his voice so rarely heard that only Ayaka, Thoma and Xue Yin have. But Xue Yin notices the edge in his voice, the slight shake of his hands, and frowns in worry. The festival preparations have been going smoothly, and everything seems to be falling into place. What could be bothering him?

"You seem on edge, my lord." He's not afraid to point out, walking over to sit on the other side of Ayato's table. He, again, notices Ayato pointedly looking away from him, the grip on his pen tightening as he tries to concentrate on the paper in front of him. "If there's anything that's not up to your expectations, I'll go out and have it fixed as soon as—"

"No." Ayato says abruptly, sitting up and looking startled at himself for interrupting. Through the worry, Xue Yin smiles fondly. It's always cute whenever Ayato becomes less composed than he usually is. "It's..."

But Xue Yin has a feeling he already knows what Ayato wants. "If you need, I can stay with you to work through our errands today."

Ayato looks up, embarrassment obvious in the tinge of pink on the tips of his ears, and Xue Yin has to bite back a laugh. As calculated as Ayato may be, always two steps ahead of everyone, Xue Yin is but a mere one step behind, making it much easier for him to fall into the same stride as him. All he needs to do is to step forward first.

"...Yes." Ayato chuckles. Xue Yin notices his hands have stopped shaking. "That's what I had planned for you."

"Then how could I say no, my lord?" Xue Yin laughs. "You need only ask if you want me to stay."

He stands up to fetch his own pen case from his room, and once far enough, doesn't notice Ayato's expression dimming, looking back down at his paper with a mumble.

"…I see…"

——————————

Paimon had asked Xue Yin during their time together why he was working for Ayato despite being an adeptus, and his answer was simple. Xue Yin has always been the type to repay people with his trust whenever they save him in times of need. His sister used to tease him for it, claiming he was always so quick to fall. Xue Yin would always say he just had the intuition, the ability to see people's intentions, and that there are more good people in the world than everyone seems to think. Ayato, of course, was no exception.

Xue Yin usually had no trouble traversing through the lands of Inazuma. He'd been to the nation close to a hundred times, having seen its changes (or lately, lack thereof) during the millennia he's travelled around Teyvat. But this particular visit was problematic—nothing seemed to go his way, not with all the thunderstorms and trouble stirring not only outside of Narukami Island. It seemed that treasure hoarders, Nobushi and the like had set camp between the city and towns as well. Usually, Xue Yin would wipe them out with a flick of his wrist, but his fatigue was proving to take a toll on him, and on this particular rainy night nine years ago, he had no choice but to skid left and sprint into Chinju Forest to rid the treasure hoarders at his trail.

He had lost them by the time he made it out, probably due to the pranks the bake-danuki decided to pull on them. He'd been in this forest enough times to not be fooled by those pesky creatures anymore. But no thanks to this detour, Xue Yin found himself on his last legs. He had planned to go to his accommodation in the city, but it was already dark, and his feet could no longer take him further than a mile. So Xue Yin hobbled over to the nearest shelter, his vision growing blurry as exhaustion surrounded him like a weighted blanket.

He had then woken up under one, the sun already high enough to blind his eyes as he sat up, trying to recognise his surroundings. Who saved him?

A man with blond hair slid the door open then and almost startled to see Xue Yin awake, careful to not jostle the tray in his hands. "Oh! You're awake." He had smiled, quickly regaining composure as he set the tray down next to him. "My lord found you just outside the estate last night, and you looked worse for wear, so he had you taken in. Luckily, you seem to be fine. I'm Thoma. You're currently in the Kamisato estate."

"So, that's it?" Paimon asked when he retold the story, a bewildered look on her face. "You became his secretary because he saved you once?"

"It wasn't just that, of course." Xue Yin had laughed, a particular softness in his expression that Paimon and the traveller side eyed each other for. If he noticed, he didn't say anything. "I heard whispers after I left the estate. It was almost the previous clan head's death anniversary then. All of these mumbles between the townspeople about how sorry they felt for Ayato, and how he had the whole clan's future resting on his shoulders. And yet he saved me and took me in."

Xue Yin sighed, looking out on the cliffside of Amakane Island to Inazuma city. "Thoma told me I could leave after breakfast, so I did. But I bumped into Ayato on my way out. Of course, I had to say my gratitude. He seemed tired, but so… earnest. Genuine and headstrong. I could feel the determination within him even in those brief seconds and upon hearing what had happened to him, I knew."

"Knew what?" The traveller asked, and Xue Yin laughed behind his hand.

"I'm sure you already know, dear." He winked, but nevertheless looked back out to the city lights, the yearning in his eyes hard to ignore. "I knew he was going to make it work, and I wanted to stand beside him to see him prosper."

——————————

"You tell me to stay beside you for work today, but I was hoping you would let me join your meeting with Lady Guuji, my lord." Xue Yin teases with ease as Ayato steps out of Uyuu Restaurant. Miko laughs behind her hand, mirth in her eyes, no doubt at hearing the Kamisato clan head being lightly jabbed. "I assume the meeting was more amicable than usual?"

"Your lord was slightly more agreeable today." Miko plays along, even though Xue Yin is sure they both sense the slight exasperation in Ayato's polite smile. "Have you finally managed to tame him?"

"I believe I wouldn't know how, even if I wanted to." Xue Yin chuckles, resisting the urge to beam when he feels Ayato squinting at him. "But it's alright, I think he's best this way."

"Ever the faithful secretary, hm." Miko sighs dramatically. "Shame, I can't help but feel jealous that your loyalty isn't directed towards me. You would fit right in with the Yae Publishing House."

"Well, I suppose that's just too bad, isn't it?" Ayato interjects, a little more bristled than usual as he slides an arm around Xue Yin's waist, making the other freeze for a second too long. Xue Yin carefully regains his composure. What's with him all of a sudden? "I know Xue Yin's one of a kind, but you'll just have to accept that I've taken him."

"How overprotective." Miko muses, a mischievous glint in her eyes. She says nothing more about her job proposal, though—and as friendly as they are with each other, Xue Yin wouldn't take her up on the offer no matter how hard she tried. He's sure all three of them know this. "Don't worry, I know full well where his loyalty lies. Sometimes it's nauseating to hear about."

"L-Lady Guuji!" Xue Yin stammers, composure breaking upon the sudden impact of Miko's teasing.

But Miko only laughs, of course, bidding the two goodbye and walking off before Xue Yin can even recover from the blow.

Ayato's silent, but his hand on Xue Yin's waist speaks thousands that Xue Yin feels he shouldn't process just yet. So instead, he reaches into his sleeve to bring out a small plastic bag. Two milk tea drinks sit in it, and he takes one out to hand to Ayato. "I stopped by Kiminami while waiting for you, and figured you needed one. You haven't had lunch yet, after all. Tomoki's currently situated at Ritou, so unfortunately I couldn't go to his store instead."

He would never say it out loud from how embarrassing it is, but Xue Yin has long since admitted to himself that one of the greatest joys in his long life so far is seeing Ayato's expression turn from calm and composed to pleasant surprise. The thought of surprising the cunning Yashiro Commissioner himself makes Xue Yin prouder than he can admit, and he can't even complain to himself at the sudden lack of warmth around his waist as Ayato takes the drink. He can never complain, not when he can see Ayato quirking up a youthful smile before taking a sip. "How attentive of you, Xue Yin."

Xue Yin finally lets himself beam then, all bright and unabashed. The brief tension in Ayato's shoulders goes unnoticed as they make their walk back to the estate.

Tens of proposals signed and a few meetings set at the estate later, and Xue Yin finds himself a rare break in the late afternoon. He reserves his breaks for walks around Narukami Island or for tending to his flowers, but his recent workload means the garden hasn't been tended to for a while, which is a shame. Ayato has some more work to do, but surely he wouldn't be opposed to Xue Yin taking a rest from duties, right?

"Wait—" Ayato stands, almost knocking over his papers in the process. He's been on edge for the entire day, Xue Yin notes in mild worry. From staying by his side, they've gone through their work quicker than usual, so he thought the company and decreased workload would help ease Ayato's sudden nerves. He's worried now, seeing that it hasn't.

"Yes, my lord?" But nevertheless, Xue Yin stays composed, because he knows pushing wouldn't provide anything helpful.

"...Would you mind," Ayato breathes out, as if choosing his next words carefully. Which he usually does, of course, but not as obvious as he is right now, "If I joined you?"

"...In tending the garden?" Xue Yin blinks, unable to hide the bewilderment in his voice. It's known throughout the estate that Ayato barely has any free time, and he would prefer if he didn't. If there was something he could do that mattered more and better impacted the clan and Commission as a whole, he would spend all of his time doing it if he could, because it was his duty, and it was what he loved doing most. Ayato proposing to join Xue Yin when he still has papers left to tend to is… unheard of, to say the least. "My lord, you still have papers to sign…"

"What good will signing those papers do if I'm far too tired to read through them properly?" Ayato points out as he walks up to Xue Yin, obvious to the other's eyes that he's trying to keep calm, from the way he wrings his fingers. "Besides, sometimes I see you tending to the flowers from my office, and I can't help but watch whenever I do. I hope you don't mind teaching me how to do it?"

'He… watches me?' Xue Yin blinks, red rising to his cheeks before he could will it down. It's more embarrassing because he talks to the flowers. They have words to say, much like any living being would, but he knows any mere mortal would find it strange. But maybe Ayato isn't just anyone either.

"...Of course." Xue Yin says after a few moments, finding that this will be good for him. As much as Xue Yin admires how hard Ayato works, he would never oppose to him getting more rest from his duties. Of course Xue Yin worries sometimes, just like anyone would for someone they cared about this much.

And of course, anyone would have the same fluttery feeling in their chest upon seeing that person's shoulders relax, right? Butterflies in their stomach when they see them smile with so much comfort and ease. Is it not normal for Xue Yin's heart to skip a beat when Ayato takes his hand and holds it tight, even if only to lead him out of the office?

Of course, Xue Yin's no fool to not recognise what these complicated feelings mean. But maybe there's no harm in pretending for a while longer, only because he hasn't calculated how to take that step forward yet.

——————————

As it turns out, teaching a Commissioner new tricks proves to be a more amusing task than Xue Yin had expected.

"Here?" Ayato asks, garden shears too close to the leaves for comfort. "This part's sticking out a bit…"

"There are too many flowers close to it, my lord." Xue Yin laughs softly, moving to take Ayato's hands and lead him to a leafless branch sticking out so he can snip that instead. If he feels the warmth radiating from Ayato's cheeks from here, he doesn't say anything. He's sure they've both noticed already, anyway. "I mostly trim the garden to make sure it's safe to walk through. Little imperfections such as these make it more… charming, don’t you think?"

Ayato steps back to admire his work—he had trimmed this flower bush all on his own after ten minutes of Xue Yin teaching him. Kind of. He's usually a fast learner, so Xue Yin can't help but be amused at how many times he'd asked for help. He wonders if Ayato even needs help, or if he simply wishes for Xue Yin to stay by his side. He doesn't allow himself to indulge in that thought for long, though.

"I have to agree with you. It's rather cute." Ayato hums, a proud little smile on his lips that Xue Yin inwardly coos at. Even Kamisato Ayato has his boyish charms.

But if not for Xue Yin having to walk past him to get the rake, he wouldn't have heard what Ayato says next, voice so soft it almost gets lost in the wind.

"I wonder how the garden will fare when you're gone…"

Time seemingly slows down then, the setting sun only further revealing the sombre glow in Ayato's eyes. It's nothing Xue Yin hasn't seen before—he has in rare nights, in the cold of winter when Ayato allows himself a moment of vulnerability to think about the ones dear to him he has lost.

Or the ones dear to him he might one day lose.

"...So that's what you've been worried about." Xue Yin smiles, nothing short of fond as he walks back up to Ayato. Ayato looks at him and surprise flashes across his face for a brief moment, before making way for sheepish guilt and such inexplicable longing that Xue Yin has to take a breath upon seeing it.

"My apologies for not telling you." Ayato chuckles, hands behind his back as he looks out towards the sea. "I couldn't help but eavesdrop on your conversation with the traveller and their companion last night."

Xue Yin smiles, the twinge of guilt strong in his own chest. Who knows how Ayato could've felt upon hearing that his secretary was thinking about leaving, to go back home? When he's been so loyal all this time?

"I respect your decision, though." Ayato speaks up, and although he doesn't doubt his words ring true, Xue Yin notices the slight hesitation in his voice. "We both know how important family is, and it would hurt me as well if I kept you from coming home any longer.

But perhaps I allowed myself to be a bit selfish today." He chuckles sheepishly, the sunset concealing his flushed cheeks just barely as he looks back down to the flower bush. "I had barely given myself time to process what I heard, and the thought of parting with you… I had to drown myself in work to stop thinking about it. So I couldn't help but ask for your company today."

Normally, flatteries such as these would make Xue Yin's heart skip a beat. He knows he's doing good work for the Commission to make not only his lord's, but his other coworkers' workload easier. He's good at what he does, and he doesn't need to be reassured such. But that doesn't mean it doesn't feel nice whenever Ayato reminds him of how indispensable he is to the clan. That sense of belonging comes back stronger every time he does.

So that's when Xue Yin laughs—softly, behind his hand. Not in ridicule, but Ayato gives him a confused look anyways, boyish pout only making him look even cuter in Xue Yin's eyes.

Xue Yin stops quickly though, aware the lack of context could make Ayato more upset, and takes his hand to hold tight, revelling in the way Ayato flusters just a tad. "Come. We still have the camellia trees to tend to, my lord."

The camellia trees lined up at the back of the estate stand tall but hidden, a perfect spot of seclusion from any visitors. It's where Xue Yin finds himself gravitating towards to relax, the sweet whispers of the camellias never failing to lull him to a peaceful nap.

Xue Yin wordlessly hands Ayato the garden shears, and Ayato hesitates for a moment—understandably, after being left hanging from his vulnerable confession—but the look in Xue Yin's eyes leads him to take them, unable to resist the sweet openness within them. Ayato may be the one who leads Xue Yin due to his higher rank, but he always finds himself surprised at how in tune Xue Yin is with him. At times, even more than he is with himself. And what is even more surprising is that he can't find it in him at all to mind being wrapped around Xue Yin's finger from time to time.

So he lets Xue Yin be one step ahead of him this once, and they work in silence for a few minutes, the only sound to accompany them the satisfying snip of shear to branch.

"...In Fontaine," Xue Yin finally speaks up, resisting the urge to giggle when he notices Ayato tense with bated breath, "Camellias send a message different from what we might be used to here."

Breaking his own rules, he decides to snip a couple of fully bloomed flowers—one red, one pink. "Red camellias signify nobility here. A warrior's strength, of bravery no matter the odds. They symbolise the honour of those we have lost protecting us. I've always admired how meaningful they are."

He smells the flowers, as if to take a deep breath to calm his nerves, and walks up to Ayato. The both of them put down their shears, and Xue Yin smiles at how in tune Ayato is with him. He puts the flowers into his hands and holds them. When he looks up, he lets himself be a little selfish and bask in the way Ayato seems to glow, with the sun disappearing into the ocean behind him, purple and blue making him look even more handsome than he already is, despite the adorable slight fluster on his face.

"In Fontaine, pink camellias are given when you miss someone." Xue Yin says, unable to hide the slight waver in his voice—not that he wants to, anyway. He's not the type to show vulnerability to anyone, but Ayato isn't just anyone. "When you long to see someone, and you long to be with them, you send these to express such yearning."

Ayato is silent for a moment, looking down at the flowers and at their hands, and the newfound soft firmness in his eyes when he looks back at Xue Yin's is enough to set off those butterflies back in his stomach. "And red camellias?"

Xue Yin smiles, knowing. He knows Ayato doesn't even need to ask. "I'm sure you can guess, my lord."

He takes a deep, shaky breath then and looks down, his grip on Ayato's hands tightening as he thinks about what to say. Not because it'll be hard for Ayato to take in, but because he still hasn't quite come to terms with it himself.

"...Ayato, I have no place left in Liyue." He says after a long moment of silence, feeling Ayato startle a bit at being called by name. "It's changed drastically. I've told you, haven’t I? Rex Lapis came to me in a dream and told me what had happened. That my contract… was over.

It was all too hard to process. Too hard to face the truth that in my last moments as Liyue's protector, I did no such protecting. I couldn't. I felt helpless, like I had nowhere else to go. My contract was to wander, to travel wherever I pleased but to always come home whenever home needed me. And in the final time that it did, I couldn't be there. I longed to see my sister again, but after that… I wasn't even sure if I could."

It's still a more sensitive topic than he had expected it to be, and he doesn't even register his shoulders shaking until he's pulled into an embrace—one he's grown familiar with behind closed doors, as Ayato had been there to comfort him throughout his grief.

But Xue Yin steels himself and gulps audibly, not wanting Ayato to say anything until he's done. "But you remember what you said to me that night, don't you? When I told you everything. I could never bring myself to forget it."

Ayato speaks up after a beat, and the tenderness in his voice doesn't go unnoticed. "That you belonged here."

Xue Yin chuckles, the small lump in his throat forcing a few tears out. Ayato pulls back a little as if he sensed it, wiping at Xue Yin's cheek before he could do it himself.

"And that I do." Xue Yin reassures both Ayato and himself, arms sliding around him and gently squeezing. "I had almost forgotten in my grief, and I felt it with the others too. It was hard for all of us adepti to find new purpose in our life, but some of us had almost forgotten that we already found it."

Xue Yin smiles again, this time brighter than he has since the passing, as bright as he had when the Yashiro Commission hosted its first festival after being on the brink of collapse. It's a smile of pride—pride that he was part of something so great—and a deep, inexplicable adoration for the man he worked alongside to make it work. For the man he believed in and swore his loyalty to, all those years ago.

"And mine is with you, Ayato."

Even in this tender moment, Xue Yin can't help but giggle at the hundreds of flashes of emotion that cross Ayato's face in a split second, but nothing could prepare him for the gentle press of his lips against his forehead, leaving Xue Yin to go through a myriad of emotions on his own. Always one step ahead of each other.

"So…" Ayato starts, still a nervous edge to his laugh when Xue Yin's too slow to regain composure. As always, when it comes to him. "You're not going back to Liyue?"

"Not forever." Xue Yin reassures, shaking his head. "I was only planning to ask you if I could take a week's leave after the festival."

"...Gosh, how silly of me." Ayato laughs, this time unrestrained like all the weight's been lifted off his shoulders. It's so light, so beautiful that Xue Yin feels all his worries disappear as well, his own genuine laughs carried into the wind. "And here I was, acting like a spoiled child being left alone for the first time."

"I'm not surprised." Xue Yin teases as easily as he breathes, always easy whenever he's around Ayato. "Sometimes I wonder what you would do without me."

"You know perfectly well I would do just fine." He tsks back, the smile on his lips Xue Yin is sure no one else but him has seen before. "In terms of work, at least. But I have to admit, you help me feel at ease. The fact that I want you around is the reason why I need you."

"You flatter me." Xue Yin hums, reluctantly pulling away from the hug. He won't admit it, not yet, but the longer he spends in Ayato's arms, the more willing his knees are to give in. "But I know the truth, my lord. Two pairs of hands are better than one."

"Perhaps." Ayato chuckles. "So it wouldn't be selfish of me to ask you to stay?"

…Xue Yin grins, moving forward himself to press a kiss on Ayato's cheek and relishing in the way he jumps, just a little. How cute. "I told you, all you need to do is ask."

Ayato shakes his head a little to compose himself after a few moments of shock, laughing in mild disbelief. "I wonder how long we're going to keep trying to outsmart each other here."

"Do you not think it's fun?" Xue Yin pouts, taking the garden shears and looking over the camellia trees one more time to make sure they're well trimmed. "I think it is. After all, I'm the only one who can truly challenge you in a game of shogi, my lord."

Ayato shakes his head again, expression fond as he follows Xue Yin to the corner. But before they can round it to be visible to any public eye, he takes his wrist and tugs him back, one final question burning on his lips.

"Xue Yin." He starts, Xue Yin turning around with a confused, but amused expression. They both know Ayato's only asking now so he gets the last laugh, but Xue Yin's right. Their little intellectual games are some of Ayato's favourite pastimes.

"This red camellia…" He looks at the flowers in his hand, and back up to Xue Yin, revelling in the soft colour of his cheeks. "What does it mean for us?"

Xue Yin takes a breath to answer, head tilting as he hums in thought. Then suddenly, the smile on his face tells Ayato that he may not get the last laugh after all.

"I'll tell you when I return. We have more papers to sign, don't we?"

Ayato watches in stunned silence as Xue Yin steps back, wrist free from the slack in his grip. He only comes to when he hears Xue Yin laugh loud and bright as he rounds the corner, and Ayato splutters despite himself, almost tripping on his feet to try and catch up. He does nothing to hold back the sparkling laugh bubbling from his chest, the ripples of heart beating wildly even in still waters. "Hey—!"

When Xue Yin notices the vase of red and pink camellia by Ayato's table when he comes into the office the next day, he says nothing of it. Because they both already know.

[extravalgant]

that yum isnt even alcoholic its like kombucha

traced over some its always sunny screencaps that i had collecting dust in my computer +_+ its been a while since ive hastily drawn some funnies... now feat. a background (from the game)

LETS SEE WHAT ELSE... some older wizseins and novus funnies from when test realm barely dropped back in november. and a comic about how i think the comfort process would go when dealing with ~worldly responsibilities~

[skrunksthatwunk]

been wringing my hands about the concept of family therapy. scary stuff. like maybe it could help and we sure as hell need SOMETHING to change but i think it would be like taking a potato peeler to the soles of my feet

[slashingdisneypasta]

Erik Destler x HaplessOperaHouseManager!Reader || Excerpt

Plot: You've known about Erik for years- you even know about his home. You don't do anything about him, because... well you wouldn't want to be cruel and put him on the streets. But good god does he not make your kindness easy.

Here you get a stress nosebleed because of him and he takes a moment from the murder and the dramatics to help you out.

Warnings: Nosebleed.

Tagging: @marinerainbow , @masqueradeball , @miss_understood , and @thecourtofgraywaves .

You're just in the middle of yelling at him, chucking all your incident records down on top of his written music to demonstrate just how ridiculously thick the pile is because of his bi-regular murderous outbursts and calling the 'opera ghost' an absolute twat- when you feel a trickling under your nose, on your top lip.

You stop and touch your finger to it. When you bring your hand away and theirs blood, you groan. Aghhh! Of bloody course! Now you're getting nosebleeds!? Goddamni-

Erik emerges from where he was cooped up in a dark corner, hidden from you even in his little sewer home, and before you know it he's completely invaded your space; ignoring or perhaps not giving a damn about your personal comfort. Probably not giving a damn. "What- "

You feel his fingers search your pockets (completely indecent. You suppose you should have expected he would be that way though; coarse and brash. Living in the walls for years will do that to a man), and when he doesn't seem to find what he was looking for he sighs in frustration and then digs into his own coat pockets. Out comes a handkerchief and he twists and folds it quite gracefully (irritatingly gracefully) into a tissue, before forcefully holding your bloody fingers away from your body by the wrist and tipping your head back with his handkerchief-holding hand. "Hold still, Y/N... "

You do as you're told, but you also give him a frustrated, stern look. "Excuse me- " With an eyeroll, Erik carefully holds the fabric up to your nose: laser focused on the blood under nose even in the dim lighting from candles. "... What the hell are you doing?"

You should be more concerned about a man being this close to you- touching you so intimately with gentle but firm hands- but its Erik. So you're not too concerned, for whatever reason. Perhaps because he's not a man, he's an irritation, honestly.

You feel mildly comfortable with him like this. You could call it a work break- as if you got taken hostage by the opera ghost so whoops, you couldn't do any work for a nice block of time.

Yeah, he grabbed me and I couldn't move for 10 minutes. That paperwork got lost in the struggle, I'm afraid- Oh, no, I'm fine. Back to work I suppose!

"I think you might find this is helping... " He mutters, being in such close quarters with you that he doesn't have to speak at full volume, gently pressing the handkerchief against your nose.

"You caused this, you know??"

His eyes flash up from what he's doing, to yours, and you would be startled if you weren't so used to him. Him an his intensity all the time; sudden movements and deep eye contact. You've allowed him to stay in this opera house for years despite the trouble he causes you, because first of all you know he would never leave even if you tried to evict and him and second of all- where would he go, anyway?? You certainly wouldn't put a man out on the streets, even one like Erik.

He takes a deep breath, calming himself. "... I don't mean to hurt you, Y/N."

Rolling your eyes upwards, even as your expression softens the tiniest bit, you sigh. Yes, that's nice, but he knows very well his bullshit effects you so the sentiment is not particularly practical. And in your life, your work which is your life really, the practical is what really matters. "Well you do a good job of it."

"-I mean to hurt everyone else."

Sigh. Here we go. "Yes I know Erik."

"But I-..." Another deep breath. He's not looking you in the eye any longer, rather your nose and his handkerchief, but you're looking at him- and you see his jaw tighten; thinking hard and forcing himself to say things. Non-terrible things. "I regret it if this is truly my fault."

"... it is."

"Then I regret it."

"Do you?"

"Yes, I regret."

"Are you saying that you're sorry??... " You're mind is boggled at the thought of Erik apologising for his actions- but that is certainly how it sounds.

Immediately he tells you 'no, not at all'... before changing his mind a second later. "Perhaps, a small part, towards you. This. I don't intend to-... You've been reasonable, as far as people go. Quite-- reasonable. And I... I do not want my actions to have caused you harm."

You should let that be it. You should let him escape this without abandoning his strict sense of dignity- but you can't help yourself. "-so you're saying sorry??" You insist, tilting your head clockwise ever-so-slightly; curious like a cat.

A deep, frustrated sigh. "I don't believe I said that, but if that's how you wish to interpret my words... " He shrugs nonchalantly, trying to just focus on folding the handkerchief again and pressing a clean part to your nose again. "enjoy."

Rolling your eyes, you finally give a small smile. "Okay I will, Erik,.. "

[period-of-nocturne]

just wanted to say i loved your tags on the shinonome siblings post you just reblogged. so insightful! these two make each other better in their own backwards ways—akito who doesn’t want to end up like ena, beaten down and lost without her passion, and ena who wants to be a better sister for him…

i think there’s something to be said for how ena is the eldest, and also the “problem child” of the family. akito has learned to mediate and protect because of her, and i think in a perfect world where we actually focus on the shinofamily dynamic in-canon, there would be some guilt there. both of them were forced to grow up fast, but akito especially, since ena was stuck in the same place for Years without maturing. aghhh

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah thanks ! I haven't touched pjsk in months but somehow those two still live in my brain it's worse than a disease

And definitely. She's the older sibling but it's like Akito tried to become his older sister's older brother at some point. Or maybe he didn't really tried and it just kind of happened. But in both case Ena would hate this with all her heart because 'How Dare He I'm Supposed To Be The Older One Here! Anyway bring me cheesecake thanks' or something like that.

It's funny to think it happened around the time Akito has his growth spurt too. And also terrible for Ena because it makes it worse. One day he was just her baby brother and the next he's taller than her. And on top of that he's stealing her bigger sibling role and handle her while she's being a messy capricious mess who snaps on him when he didn't deserved it.

I frame it as Ena being upset at Akito because it's probably how I'd pretend to react in her situation - And she could do the same too - but we all know she'd just be pissed at herself in reality. She'd just hate being stuck here as a total mess, snapping on her baby brother who never did anything wrong and never refuses her anything despite how much he can complain about her, and looking at him becoming the responsible one, taking care of her instead of the opposite and progressing towards his own dream. And he probably didn't told her what's going on in Vivid Street, too. And she probably saw his frustration build up more and more each day without knowing why. And in the state she was in where you don't think rationally and hate yourself so much, when someone is upset and you don't know why and you already feel like you failed them so much you then to think it's all your fault. Granted, she probably added onto it when snapping on him, but it wasn't just that. There was much more going on than just that.

Anyway I'm not sure where I'm going. I think I read the word 'guilt' and thought of Ena immediately because of course she must feel terribly guilty for everything she did back then even if she'll never outright say it or not before another year manifesting for Shinonome event 2 if it still hasn't dropped.

Oh and yeah the way her father and teacher talked to her at the time, implying she wasn't ready yet or not serious enough, or too emotional (ofc men had to put down a girl for being too emotional too. Of course.) to become an artist and actually improve when she was just a TEENAGER. tiskkzkalktkfjabnt'tlzkdkgkfkek. Stupid teacher blaming a 14 years old for seeking attention. As if it was an extremely weird, uncommon and unacceptable teenager behaviour. As if she wouldn't grow out of it later without all of your stupids inputs of jaded depressed old artists. Arrrrgh.

I start rambling again. Never get me started on the Shinonome I'm unstoppable. I could even keep going but I'll stop here and shorten it to : You're so right you totally get it

[aliasrocket]

I hope you're having a fabulous day, my friend.

Would I be able to request an imagine by any chance?

While Rocket and fem!Reader were fucking in Rocket's room on Knowhere, someone knocks on the door.

You choose what happens next ;)

YES YES OMG OFC!! THIS HAS ME ABSOLUTELY FERAL HOLY SHIT AGHHH OKOK

Also side note everyone!! I realize ‘tag-lists’ are a thing on Tumblr so after this I’m gonna be making a post about that hut for now, do reply to this if you’d like to be in any taglist for any kinds of rocket content I may post (headcanons, imagines, gifs) so I can tag you!!

gif source / masterlist! / request stuff!! <3

The bed creaked and rocked to the sloppy rhythm of Rocket’s pounding, but of course you weren’t complaining since you had been what he was pounding into.

Your moans had long filled the room since you started, and if you hadn’t been so terribly used to it by now, you would have covered your face in shame as Rocket looked at you with a smug grin etched on his face.

You could tell he was getting closer by the second as his pace picked up, messily but definitely slamming hard into your g-spot as you were squealing with each frantic thrust.

But the stars were knocked right out of your brain when a loud sound thundered from your door.

Rocket continued, now keeping a low growl at bay as he didn’t want you to get the wrong message—it had been something he struggled to do for a while now, but in this moment it didn’t seem like you had been the problem.

More crackling knocks came through your door.

“Rocket—”

“I know,” he finally let a growl loose as his pounding grew straight up merciless, causing a long string of whimpers to run from your mouth. “No way I’m givin’ up those sweet sounds for some fuck at the door. Not when you’re so goddamn pretty for me.”

It hadn’t even been a minute since he’s said that before something very strange happened.

“Rocket!”

Now that had caused Rocket to freeze dead in his spot.

The voice sounded male, a little tired but otherwise quite sure of the unspoken statement it just made.

His nails peeled away from your hips and hopped down from your bed to gather his clothes.

“Could you do something for me?” Rocket asked in a shallow breath, zipping his pants up.

“Hm?”

“Go to the bathroom.”

“What?? Why? Do you know who’s at the door?”

“I’ll tell you all about it later, okay? Just …”

Rocket straightened out his shirt after throwing it on haphazardly, letting it roll down past his abdomen as he walked towards the door.

“Please just do this for me.

“Please.”

Rocket didn’t have to beg for you to do literally anything for him, but he didn’t have to know that, so you pretend to consider it for a moment before relenting.

You close the door to your bathroom but since it is within your bedroom area, you were able to pick up the noise of Rocket opening the door.

“Yeah, thought you’d be here.”

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I thought you’d be happier to see your ol’ pal.”

“I would be except for the fact that you’re supposed to be on Terra and also the fact that you knew I would be here.”

“ … you do realize you’ve been making it painfully obvious to the entire fucking bar that that one bartender and you are fucking right?”

You cup a hand over your mouth. Holy fucking shit.

That was when you made the very reasonable conclusion that the great Starlord was at your door.

“How do you know where she lives?”

“Ah yeah that—you know what we’ve got more pressing matters to attend to—we got a commission.”

“The commission can wait for my goddamn orgasm, for fuck’s sake.”

“Oh, fuck c’mon man, I didn’t need to hear that—”

“Well you’re hearing it Quill! I’m not happy about you comin’ over here and knocking like it’s the end of the fuckin’ world! I’ll talk to you later, but right now I got business to finish.”

after a few seconds of silence, you heard the door slam shut.

Rocket called out to you by your name, and you ignore the butterflies picking at your stomach when he does. “You can come out!”

When you open the door, Rocket was already on the bed naked and waiting for you, staring at you from head to toe.

Since he ‘banished’ you to the bathroom, you didn’t feel the need to put on clothes and Rocket clearly didn’t mind. In fact, he seemed to be enjoying it.

“Aren’t you put off by that conversation?” You chuckled, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Rocket rolled his eyes. “Not when you enter the room looking like that.”

“This is technically how I look all the time,” you quipped again, you couldn’t help yourself when Rocket was so fun to annoy.

He grabbed you by the arm and was somehow able to yank you back on the pillows, climbing over you and making you remember the pleasure he was thrusting into you moments before.

“Stop acting so innocent, princess. I know you were close, too.

“You don’t want me to punish you, do you?”

Thank you so much for reading!!

// tip jar. commission me for art/fanfic <33

[icouldhyperfixatehim]

last twilight finale time for me and i'm going to jot my thoughts as i go and just post it altogether bc i don't want to fill the tag w nonsense to excess so lets go

4 minutes in and i'm already pissed off. 3 years my entire hole, ugh. where's that meme of a woman putting a toy out of a child's reach? i'm the woman the child is p'aof and the toy is fucking time skips

so glad mork got to fulfil his five minute dream of being part of the exploitative tourism sector decimating hawaii. cool love that for him, it's definitely better than finding healing through love and support or whatever

i hope they had fun with the mork porjai implication bait and switch, because night walked through the door and my only reaction was: well obviously -_-

and here's the man himself! aof why are you doing your stan lee cameo in THIS ep of all eps. you could have photoshopped yourself into the last twilight mountain scene like the teletubbies sun and i'd have been less fucked off w you right now

okay but i'm never too bitter to appreciate a nice little bookshop. this is cute. i hope the shelves have braille indicators or smth. would have been cool to see some practical accessibility considerations - evidence of what day has learned and how he's letting the ladder down for others. also where's his white cane? i thought he was finally using one?

the lighthearted tone of this flirting...i am being gaslit. rubbing sugar in my wounds doesn't feel any better than salt hey

i do love watching porjai get the full princess treatment though, she deserves it

their "adult" conversation over cake has me so weary. don't explain how you want me to interpret this narrative thanks, i'm a big girl with some, nay, muLTipLe brain cells. you can tell me it was all about mork pitying day and day not liking to be pitied, but i don't like being told what to think. it's a disservice to these full, multifaceted characters to turn them into informed-storytelling puppets

porjai is my ep highlight so far for real. namtan, the actress that you are and the beauty that you have in the bridal get up. nightporjai are so dark horse special to me. THIS. THIS is what i wanted for mork! to do the growing and the healing IN SUPPORT AND WITH LOVE TO STAND FIRM FROM AGHHH, not on the arse end of america for no reason at all

ah, the classic romcom airport dash, except i'm mad lmao butWAIT PORJAI DOING A GRIFT FOR LOVE SHE IS THE EP HERO!!!

oh christ. oh christ they're not are they?

no

no they are...oh my god. oh i'm. i've written this whole thing pissy over the relationship thing i didn't even. oh my god. i'm heartbroken.

"the worst page in my novel" i'm. i actually feel a little sick. how horrible. what an absolute reversal. they waited until the last 15 minutes to make my worst fear on seeing the very first trailer come true, they waited until my guard was down

to all my disabled buds out there, wherever you fall on the spectrum of weary to deeply hurt by this narrative decision: your happy ending is in no way reliant on you someday "getting better". you do not have to "get better" to be whole, to be worth loving, to find meaning and joy in your life. you are not incomplete.

this is so busted. i'm so incredibly disappointed by this turn. they cocked this up massively, i need to go make mashed potatoes bye

[jils-things]

Wishing Ekans also a good beak, take care! I enjoyed the little (indirect) conversation hehe :3

also NEWS FLASH MOUSE SI HAS A NAME. It's Euphemia (Effie for short bc I think it's cuteee annnd idk imagine almost everyone calling her Effie and only Naib keeps calling her Euphemia because he likes that more hjkhdjkl)

Aryon, Irene and Euphemia would get along I'm sure! I think Euphemia wouldn't even notice when Aryon tried to pickpocket smth from her hjkhfhkk and she's looking confused at Irene, asking “something wrong?”

AGHHH Euphemia is looking at the stars saying “Beautiful, right?” and Naib replies “yes, very beautiful” WHILE LOOKING AT HER I'M HJKHFDFJJ 🧡🧡 THIS MAKES MY HEART BEAT SO MUCH I THINK I WILL EXPLODE

Irene and Naib remind me of Mabel and Dipper - I haven't watched much of Gravity Falls but I know that sound in which she's like “uh oh somebody's in loooove” and he's like “pfff yeah sure. It's not like I lay awake at night thinking about her” and then it cuts to him in bed, wide awake PFFFTTT

OH OHH YOU KNOW ALREADY? 👀 YOU EVEN THINK NAIB IS LIKE SOME OF THE OTHER F/O'S WHAT Ahhh tbh the only similarity I found for Naib and my other favs is… some of them also have long hair and some kind of ponytail fhjkkgfgjk I think that says a lot about me

I thought at first I might already gave it away with the detective conan skin because… that character of the skin is literally mentioned on my f/o list and I'm not sure if you'd remember that and I haven't seen any other selfshippers with an f/o from that source jkkhklgfj ANYWAYS I also think it's super nice talking to you and ngl it brightens my day a bit and makes me super excited hehe 💚

OH? No time to look at your husbands pinterest? But I'm sure there are lots of nice images on it worth looking at :]]

Hjjgfdh don't look at my pinterest it's constantly growing why are artists drawing Naib that pretty oughhh

BTW LOOK

https://www.tumblr.com/mirshroom/629119160230756353/late-night-doodles?source=share

It's ur husband and my stargazing partner your brother :]

-🐭 anon

EUPHEMIA!!!!!! EEEKKK THAT IS SUCH A LOVELY NAME. even if her nickname is presented i still want to call her euphemia because i love reading it... it sounds so charminggg!!! NOT HIM CALLING HER BY FULL FIRST NAME BECAUSE IT ROLLS OFF HIS LIPS NICELY EHUEHEUHEHEHEHEHEH he brushes it off as him being "polite and respectful to a stranger" BUT NOOOO HE JUST LOVES TO SAY IT SOOO MUCH HEHEHEHE (the accidental siblings calling her euphemia ehehehehehe)

EUPHEMIA JUST TILTING HER HEAD, CONFUSED LIKE, "did something happen?" (IRENE IS HOLDING ARYON BY THE EAR, ON THE VERGE OF SCOLDING) (aryon is quietly going "ow ow ow")/j WHAHHAHAHA THEYRE SO SILLY EYYEYEYEYE

WE ARE COOKING THE NAIPHEMIA (IM CALLING THE TAG NOW /J) DYANMIC CHAT!!!!!! HE IS STARING AT HER AND SAYING "yea... beautiful..." HEHUEAHUEAHEHAAHAHOH HES SO INLOVE OH LOVERBOOYYY BTW YES THEY ARE SO MABEL AND DIPPER CODED OMG WTF i was just watching the show recently and CACKLED at that scene... naib thinking abt her that day be like.... the stargazing took him out so bad heuehuehhehehehe EEEEEEE

OH MY GOSH I THINK I DEFINITELY KNOW WHO YOU ARE JUST BECAUSE OF THAT DETECTIVE CONAN MENTION, AND TO BACK UP MY ARGUMENT WITH NAIB BEING SIMILAR: perhaps its just my general advantage of knowing naib well and comparing him to the other characters: i can DEFINTELY say he matches the vibe with the other charas. trust me. im his sister i know/jjj EHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

SQYUEUEUEUEUEUEE YOURE LOOKING FOR FANART HERE TOOOEJEHEHEUAHAUAUAUAUAA I LOOVE LOVE LOEV NORTONS BASEBALL SKIN YK ITS SO?!?!?!? ITS SO ATTRACTIVE ON HIMKFLDKKLFKLKD i can imagine cheerleader irene just going eeeeee nonnon ure doing so great ilyyyy (he is dying /pos) WAWAWA SORRY JUST WANTED TO PUT IT OUT THERE i am horribly SMITTEN by his skinsssss💚💚💚

[losersimonriley]

twenty questions for fic writers

Thank ya @femalefemur <333

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

31

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

98,041

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Just the modern warfare reboot at the moment, but I’ve got fics from a few different fandoms

4. top five fics by kudos

First Light (ghost/soap)

Keep going (ghost/soap)

Completely, Selfishly (connor/gavin)

Every way that matters (ghost/soap)

Headshot Holidays (ghost/soap)

5. do you respond to comments?

I try! I really, really appreciate anyone who takes the time to leave comments, especially with fanfic being treated more and more like ~ quick to consume content~ I try to respond to every comment because the least I can say is thank you <3 But I got way behind on replies so there are a lot just sitting in my inbox waiting right now 💀 Swear I’m gonna get to em eventually

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

How it’s supposed to be (connor/gavin) bc it’s just both of them fucking dying lmao

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This is a hard one bc I’m very much an angst with a happy ending writer, so most of my stories end on at least a hopeful note. I’ll say Every way that matters bc they are both just so sickly sweet in this one

8. do you get hate on fics?

Not bad enough that I remember. I used to have older works up before I regrettably purged them from existence that I remember getting rude comments on but wouldn’t necessarily categorise as hate

9. do you write smut?

Hellll yeahhh brotherrrr

10. craziest crossover:

I don’t have any crossovers per say but I’d really like to do a twister inspired tf 141 fic

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of 👀

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

No but I’m ok with it

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

No but I think it would be fun with someone I’m comfortable enough with! *looks at Camus with big sickly green eyes*

14. all time favorite ship?

Destiel owns me until I die, they were part of my life for so long and there is just so many years and so much between them. But god do I love ghoap

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I am going to finish all my wips even if they end up sucking ass

16. what are your writing strengths?

Dialogue maybe? I’ve been told I have good dialogue

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

Aghhh descriptions. I hate describing things. I just want the things to Happen. And pacing lmao. This is one reason why I’ve always struggled with long fics

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I know a lot of people find it unnecessary and jarring but I love it. Especially because it can encourage people to become interested in a new language

19. first fandom you wrote in?

I can’t remember if it was doctor who or my chemical romance but I’m pretty sure it was one of the two?

20. favorite fic you've written?

Oh it’s definitely gonna be Sundowning when I finish it. But so far my fav posted one is probably headshot holidays (ghost/soap) or music of the night (newt/hermann)

I’ll tag uhhhh @solivagantingrebel @lokibus @tumbleweedtech @forestshadow-wolf and anyone else who wants to do it! (sorry if y’all have already been tagged in this, I haven’t been very active on here the past few days so 🫡)

[sarishim]

i’m just gonna set up tags & pinned later, this shadowban threw me off big time and my adhd is definitely not liking this. idk if i’m even keeping drafts from the other account; idk what i’m doing. i know its a temporary feeling and i’ll get used to this new one, but aghhh

if you have any threads you want me to reply to, let me know?? i’m happy to go back through

[sol-hearth]

Ask game!

4 9 29 36 37

4 - Best game soundtrack:

AGHHH, just one?!?! Undertale OST still makes me emotional, Katana Zero OST still makes me emotional, Celeste OST still makes me emotional, Echo VN OST does shit to me, OCTOPATH TRAVELLER HAS 100% BANGERS IN THAT BITCH. Hades OST, The Ruined King OST, Doom OST. Night in the Woods - "Die anywhere else" is beautiful.

9 - Most hours in a single game:

Uhhh. League of Legends. by far. I've been playing for 10 years now. Close 2nd would be probably Minecraft and Warframe.

29 - Fav childhood game:

I guess that depends on what I count as childhood, so imma go with the days BM (Before Minecraft). In which case, Sonic Battle for the Gameboy Advance, no contest.

36 - Hottest video game character:

I have a "my blorboest blorbo" tag for a reason. Malcolm Graves from League of Legends may look a little rough in 3D renders, but I SWEAR ON GODS THAT I DO NOT EVEN BELIEVE IN, IF THEY PUT MY MAN IN THE FIGHTING GAME I WILL BE SOOOOOOOOOO NORMAL ABOUT HIS SLUTTY MARRIED DIVORCED AND REMARRIED BISEXUAL ASS.

37 - Kill, Fuck, Marry:

Hm. Kill Chase from Echo VN tbh, hate that bitch, it's his fault for everything shitty in that game, idc. Fuck Malcolm Graves cuz I need to fuck that old man, he makes me lust like no other. Marry Scott Howl from Monster Prom because he is the best marriage material from all my fictional guys.

[sunriseovergotham]

GRASPING YOUR TAGS IN BOTH HANDS LIKE A SQUEAKY TOY,, OUGHHHHH YOURE SO RIGHT

sometimes the only thing you really have in any universe is yourself... sometimes that has to be ENOUGH OIDYAGSAGHHH

IM GRASPING YOU BY THE SHOULDERS AND SHAKING YOU SO FIRMLY RN OH MY GOD I CANT STOP THINKIJG ABT THIS DUDE OH IM SO SAD OVER HIM FOREVER OH MY GODDDDDD SORRY THIA IS VERY INCOMPREHENSIBLE. LMAO. YOURE INFLICTING ME WITH TOO MUCH BRAINROT FOR ME TO MAKE SENSE

oh please please PLEASE you have to write this id give you my goddamn left hand to see this AGHHH

the thing about mike walters is that he will survive. like. *gestures to the whole series* he can survive this. he can survive losing base because he already lost them while in the compound, but this time feels worse because hes technically choosing it, while in the compound he had no control over it. he can survive this. he can survive this even if it doesnt feel like he can, even if it feels hopeless and stupid because thats just what he does. do or dont. live or die. he keeps choosing the same option every time.

[dramaism]

tag some people you want to get to know better! tagged by @seawherethesunsets thank you so much, sya, that was fun! <3

three ships: sae bom x yi hyun (happiness), jang uk x naksu/mu deok/bu yeon (alchemy of souls 1 & 2), kang doo x moon soo (just between lovers). for me it's either "us-against-the-world" chaotic couples or "let's-be-soft-and-healty" couples. there's no in between.

first ever ship: i don't really remember, it was a long time ago. but i assume it was either delena from the vampire diaries or ivan x julia from el internando. these two were the first tv shows i've ever watched i was like 12 or something

last song: "shallows" by daughter. perfect winter soundtrack

last movie: shang chi rewatch. don't really watch movies these days just rewatching some

currently reading: fanfiction, lots of it - ao3 my beloved :) also i've been trying to finish "tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow" by Gabrielle Zevin for 2 monts already lol and failing every attempt. i really love the plot but it's just aghhh reading an actual book when i need to focus my attention to it is not fun for me anymore. i read and write a lot on my job so i don't want to read on my free time too. my brain refuses to do so

currently watching: - island: on ep3 but gonna put in on hold till the next season comes. - when the weather is fine: started this because of lee jae wook, he has a cute role here - just what i needed after aos. but it's soooo slow i can't bring myself to finish even 2 episodes. and i usually love slow paced dramas idk what's happening this time. i also came to conclusion that i don't like the main couple at all so i might just watch ljw's scenes. second couple seems cute tho - crash course in romance: love my milf/dilf romance. actual adults behaving like adults - delicious. - rewatching extraordinary you: this drama is still out there being as unique as 4 years ago. also now i'm eating up jae wook's role in this even though i hated his character when it was airing. i guess aos melted my brain

currently consuming: my favorite korean variety shows, they bring me comfort

currently craving: a very long walk. the thing is - it's very slippery outside, it has been like that for a month so i can't walk for long i get tired easily. walking is another kind of therapy for me, i'm struggling

tagging lovely people i'd like to know better (without pressure of course!): @oswlld + @natahjikio + @xiaolanhua + @pannakorn

[zelzahdarkcloak]

Tag 10 People You Want to Know Better!

Tagged by @flickeringflame216 Thank you! <3

3 ships: I'm not a big shipper either but I would also agree with Eowyn and Faramir. It's just so pure and quiet and beautiful aghhh. Other than that? I have a deep abiding love for Gomez and Morticia. Another example of pure love and yes, they're a little over the top but it's absolutely genuine. Makes me so happy to see them be weird and perfect for each other. Thirdly, uhhh...do friendships count? Am I allowed to appreciate beautiful friendships or things that have no name? Neither love nor friendship but a special third thing? Because Moomin and Snufkin have a lovely relationship however you choose to see it.

1st ever ship: Again, I rarely look at a character and think "they need to be smooshed with someone stat!" but the first relationship I ever truly thought was beautiful was my grandparents on my mom's side. Their love story sounds like something out of a book and even if their relationship is not always perfect, they can be so sweet and comfortable with each other. Little kisses in the kitchen, mumbling together quietly about what they think of something early in the morning, my grandfather writing little poems and buying plants for her, her making his favorite meals, them making cookies together, and just the softness of them sitting in their recliners side by side holding hands... It's beautiful.

Last song: Source by Fever the Ghost (one of my favorite animated music videos ever!)

Last movie: It was either Dune (2021) with my brother or The Music Man (1962) with my mother.

Currently reading: Too darn much. Mainly A Winter Book by Tove Jansson, a collection of gratitude poems, and desperate attempts at catching up on Moby Dick through Whale Weekly. It doesn't help I have a thousand interests to pursue and new ones every week and not enough time or energy to do it in. I add more to my TBR than I could ever complete and I'm just....*panic*. (oh, btw @flickeringflame216 I've also had the Space Trilogy on my library holds forever now, so let me know if it's good!)

Currently watching: Moominvalley, Cowboy Bepop, and a smattering of Stargate SG-1. Also aching for a Doctor Who rewatch (specifically 10th). Help.

Currently consuming: Sleepytime tea every evening. Occasionally, mushroom cacao.

Currently craving: Complete and utter quiet. My thoughts to dim, the world to fade.

But I could also go for a cookie.

I never know who's already done this, so if you see this and would like to give it a shot, please do! I want to know everybody, ha ha.

[asahina-mafuyu-official]

>//Aghhh sorry!

It's good, np, it wasn't really you, it's pretty much just my reaction. Maybe some people need a tag? I don't know, I just got to tumblr I don't know how any of this works lol. Besides, this whole thing is pretty interesting

//Oh hello new person! I will not provide helpful information!

//I kind of operate on an ask to tag system here even though it wasn’t explicitly said. Most stuff on my blog I don’t need a tw for myself and forget that others exist. I’m you want a tag to blacklist just tell me and I’ll see what I can do (as in please give me a tag or like what you don’t wanna see).

//Glad you find this stuff interesting, and thanks for the info!

[hemera989]

hi! i love ur fics sm, you’re prob my fav writer on ao3. i wanted to ask for some tagging advice if u dont mind! i plan on publishing a multi chapter multiship fic, and im not sure yet which ships exactly will be included other than the main one or two. do you think its ok to add tags/ships even after the first few chapters are published or should it all be tagged from the beginning?

AGHHH THANK YOU and personally, i think you should have all potential ships tagged from the beginning! i had the same dilemma a while ago, but i think having the ship tags there helps people know what they’re getting into. that way, they’re not surprised by a NOTP!

not that you can’t change tags over time, but tags are all about warning people about what content is included in a fic, so i think if you know ahead of time that new ships are going to be introduced, you should tag them!

hope this helps :3