#WHAT THE FUCK EVEN WAS THAT

[simnostalgia]

Hey. Not to like, shit on the guy who 'created' the sims but... does it seem to anyone else that Will Wright is kind of a tool?

Like He created two games people love but it feels like everything he's done since then folds or never releases. He immediately jumped on NFTs because his 'problem' with The Sims was rampant piracy of content.

He's consantly vaguely star fucking like talking about how celebs love The Sims. He said in one interview that he could 'pick up a rock off the street and make a game about it people would buy'.

He acts as if he's the auteur of The Sims even though the games that most of us associate with the series were hardly worked on by him first hand. Like most of what we consider fundemental to the franchise was created by others and it sorta feels like he just uses his claim to the series to push his stupid unfun bullshit.

Like it sucks but he's sort of a washed up silicon valley techbro coasting on something he wasn't even super present for after like 2002.

[flock-of-cassowaries]

I think I need the Vampire Armand to come and erase my memory of the What We Do In the Shadows finale.

[benis-chillin]

I have now watched the Reality War.

My thoughts, in summary:

[monsamborabutterfly]

I truly watched a lot of fucking shows in my life but I've NEVER been that disappointed in a finale ever before. Which says a lot cause I've been a supernatural Stan lol

The fact that all of them got their lovey dovey unrealistic ending except for Boston and Nick who have been going through so so much growth together is beyond me.

And Boston not getting even a little bit of respect is disgusting. Mew fucking disgusts me. I literally had to do something else cause I just couldn't take watching him on screen. He triggers so many bad things and memories.

Also really doubting we're getting another NeoMark show now

I'm just so sad that they created such A+ characters like Nick and Boston, having two amazing actors on board with Neo and Mark and doing nothing with it in the end. This was so underwhelming and anticlimactic I'm actually mad.

I'm sorry to all my BostonNick peeps out there🫂🫂 we and them truly deserved better.

I've never loved bl characters as much as these two so I'm just gonna lock them in my heart and leave it at that.

If the finale and how this story ended was for you I'm truly happy. I'm a little heartbroken now though.

[hermitsdump]

-dream about true form sukuna! (but it's just manga drawings and I'm trying to plan something but idk what)

-go back to sleep

-dream a House of Leaves x Twin Peaks crossover. get stressed bc I have to learn to tell all these old white men apart. which took 3 twin peaks watches for me irl.

The killer is a woman who was pregnant at the time. she's old now. eventually took Johnny Truant back to "the pound" where she found him (just like. a short drive to a strip mall or something idk) and her husband is upset she's done this. Johnny has been a part of their little town for years.

but he is easy to find.

Johnny Truant is now in disguise as Dr. Phil. a very good disguise. there's empty homes on this loop through thr suburbs that gets a lot of traffiic, the old woman meets him there and Johnny is, in his Dr. Phil disguise that could easily fool me, greeting them like "hey guys would you like to see my lawnmower" and they sit in these chairs in the front yard. I assume no one calls the police bc they think Dr. Phil is filming some TV show.

this old woman (Alice, actually she was inspired by that doctor from Golden Kamuy) had planted bombs inside this chain link fence by the front door of a home that's been abandoned for 20 years.

someone suggests Dale Cooper could help to decode something. I'm excited that he's still in this shit town. I want to hang out with him.

some building falls the fuck apart, I think Alice's husband had built it. idk.

[themostpowerfulmagicofall]

The way major crimes ended was a travesty of writing. I’m actually disgusted.

[danibee33]

So… I’ve had thoughts about König- specifically to do with THIS video. (and this is going to deviate so hard from any sort of canon, but also.. who cares 😌)

BUT, hear me out. The König twins. (König is a common surname, so in this instance it’s not a callsign)

The König twins, Erich and Andreas. Chance bound them together as brothers- but fate bound them forever by the covenant of the blood they spilled and the water of the womb they shared.

The König twins who enlisted together, knowing they were.. different. Not just because of their stature- sure, standing 203cm tall would call attention to anyone. But it wasn’t that, it wasn’t their muscular builds, or their reserved demeanor, nor the eerie calm they brandished on the battlefield. It went so much deeper. Something intrinsic, something dark.

The König twins, whose rise through the military ranks was something to behold. They were ruthless, constantly challenging each other to go further, fight harder, aim sharper, shoot quicker- to complete every mission with terrifying efficiency.

The König twins, who were ultimately dishonorably discharged together when higher command had tried to separate them.

The König twins who had very nearly killed the person while dared tried to tear them apart.

The König twins who knew they had no marketable skills in the civilian world. So, they went on to become mercenaries- turning somehow even more relentless and brutal than they were before.

It was their laughter that you heard over the radio for the first time. That was your introduction to the most feared operators in KorTac.

Sure, you heard all the rumors. Heard that they weren’t really men at all under their hoods. Heard that they were monsters who got off on killing, that nothing else would do it for them. That’s why they chose their profession, because it wasn’t just a job. It was pleasure.

You never intended to meet them. You were nobody, nothing in the grand scheme of things. A glorified paper pusher thanks to a family connection- you were just the peon that spent their entire 8 hours every day listening to recordings from body camera footage and radio. All your job required you to do was transcribe everything you heard, and turn it over to someone who would undoubtedly redact 98% of your work anyway.

You were nobody.

Until you somehow managed to catch the König twins’ eye.

Erich was the first to approach you, and to say that everything you had heard and imagined up to that point felt like a massive understatement would be putting it lightly.

He was gargantuan. Bigger than that, even- you swore. His eyes were bright, watching you behind the hood with a look you can only akin to hunger.

And maybe you vaguely remember sputtering an apology, what you were apologizing for- you couldn’t say. Just existing in his presence, making eye contact? Fuck if you knew. The only thing you knew to be fact, was that you wanted to get away. To put distance between you and him.

But you didn’t do that, did you?

The König twins, who share everything.

And when Erich told his brother about you.. well, you were as good as theirs.

[annanother-thing]

A Thing To Be Won

for @sleepstxtic

look i said i would only do this if england won but then i remembered that i dont give a fuck, so have some uefa trophy x harry kane gothic fic im going to go hide now

It loomed above her, forbidding, its columns stark in the glow of the lamps. She shivered.

He was waiting for her as she stepped out onto the field of green, standing, watchful, shrouded in the darkness of the tunnel that seemed to go on forever, the maw of a great beast, ready to devour and despoil.

The wind tugged at her ribbons, as she stood there, like a beacon in the shadowy space, its great roof leaning over her until it parted to reveal the heavens above, the stars where she was made.

His steps were heavy on the stairs, a thud that echoed in her hollow body, a poor copy of the great roar that should have filled this place on her arrival.

Stepping out into the faint light, she saw him clearly, and shivered. He was pale, pale as a dead man, and his shirt red stained. Even the lions on his chest seemed to watch her covetously.

The darkness seemed to swirl around him like a cloak, a raven’s wing of night that threatened to swallow her whole.

She wanted to run, to hide, praying to God that someone, anyone might save her, but this place was a maze of paths that she did not know, and there were watchful eyes everywhere.

“I’ve been expecting you,” Sir Harry Kane said, “UEFA European Championship Trophy.”

~~~

She was carried along a corridor, long and dim, great windows that let in no light flanking them like ghostly mirages. She did not know who carried her, but their hands were warm, clammy, as though they too were afraid.

Down stairs so steep and long that she could have sworn they would lead her into the depths of the earth, to hell, where the souls of a damned danced to a torturous tune. She could almost hear the pipes calling her, the screams of the souls bound to fire forever echoing in her ears as suddenly the stairs ended.

Ahead she saw a pinprick of light, a hope, no matter how small, glimmered in her heart. But between her and it were figures, some in white, pale as death, some in blood red, spirits of the damned, whose screams she could still hear, echoing inside her.

She had no control, no way of crying out, of begging not to be taken towards that light which had seemed so hopeful at first glance. She did not want them to see her.

Rough fingers stretched out to touch her ribbons, to caress her curves, and if she could, she would have flinched away.

One hand reached for her, but it was slapped away by another, a familiar hand that she would know anywhere, and the trickle of ice cold fear became a deluge so great that she might drown in it.

The light that signalled the end fell on the face of Sir Harry Kane, impassive and still, but there was a touch of lust in his eyes that frightened her more than the groping hands from unseen men.

He whispered something, but she could not make it out over the screams that grew louder and louder, buzzing against her, and she cried out in pain and fear.

A pedestal, and the flash of light, bright as lightning and twice as terrifying almost overwhelmed her. She felt as though she might die, cease to exist, the life inside her draining away as wine from a cracked cup.

But the final trace of lustful fingers around the narrowness of her waist, the curve of her body was a reminder, and yet one that made her tremble with disgust. She was nothing but a thing to be won, and she felt those eyes upon her.

And she prayed to every god that existed that she would be free of those eyes.

The eyes of Sir Harry Kane.

[nvrsaidiwasinurcloset]

One of these days, I’m going to be sitting in therapy and they’ll ask what’s wrong with me and I’ll have to explain that life hasn’t been the same since I saw sexually suggestive Animal Crossing content back in 2022.

[soupforsoup]

Love that I can tell one of my mutuals just learned about the great boston molasses flood

[just-french-me-up]

'ao3 needs a like and dislike button'

what you need, my algorithm-rotten minded friend, is a grip

[messitydepressity]

The shared hate we all have for this horrific ad is really beautiful.

Y'all blocking the Tubi and Netflix accounts don't get rid of the "sponsored posts" but blocking the tags they use DOES work!!

Goodbye, disgusting child with a hat growing out of his head!

[rowanisawriter]

this what im going thru rn. if anyone gaf

[milkcryptid]

do people have no shame anymore?

[starbuck]

so many bands write songs about “relatable issues” that don’t resonate while the mountain goats write songs about issues no one has ever experienced before that are universal

[esmeraldablazingsky]

honestly i have to kinda disagree with that post thats like “being knightcore doesnt mean pro monarchy just swear ur undying loyalty to ur bff or ur crush or smth”

no. thats not what makes it sexy. either grapple with your beloved master’s role as a symbol of the state or choose to ignore it entirely and remain their loyal hound to whatever end, uncaring of the structures of power which you serve. become naught but a blade, the burden of your choices left to settle in the hand that wields you. it’s not about being besties forever it’s about OWNERSHIP and DUBIOUS MORALITY and FRANKLY QUESTIONABLE POWER DIFFERENTIALS