#What happened to 'there's no particular bad guy in Hetalia'?

[glittery-ishfish]

Needlessly Long and Dramatic APH Belarus Slander

A/N: Just to clarify, I am NOT at all referring to the REAL COUNTRY of Belarus. The citizens of Belarus are already trying so hard to fight, literally risking their lives, for freedom and national identity. I am not about to ignorantly hold an entire country accountable for what their government and dictator do and have done, especially since people are dying trying to fight for basic human rights.

This is about HETALIA’S Belarus. SPECIFICALLY Hetalia’s Belarus as a PERSON, not as a nation. As I said in one of my first posts, there’s not nearly enough slander of this depiction of Belarus. And when there was, it was for the wrong reasons (“she gets in between me and my ships”). This has been festering inside me and I need to let it all out.

And do keep in mind that this is APH Belarus slander. This is my opinion. It's in the title. Don't like it? Then move on. I don't care, I don't wanna hear it.

And if you stayed, I hope you're ready because I'm about to spill my angry guts out😃👍

Hetalia’s Belarus is a terrible person and a poor, insulting personification of the country.

How?

Let's see, uh…

She bullies, deliberately ignores, and is overall a complete cow to her older sister because she falsely assumes that Russia wants to marry her instead.

Is needlessly hostile and rude to everyone, regardless if they mean well.

Threatens and curses people who disagree with, or even question, Russia because "how dare they have an opinion".

Gets angry when Russia talks to anyone who isn't her, regardless if it’s for professional reasons.

One of the (many, many, many) reasons why Russia doesn’t have any friends is because she scares people off just to have him all to herself.

Blames other people (especially her sister) for Russia's constant avoidance of her rather than reflecting on her own behavior.

Is weirdly contradictory. She’s been shown actively stalking seeking out recruits to ‘become one’ with Russia but gets all ornery and pissy when said recruits are close to him (like, what did you expect??).

Makes Russia’s life more of a living Hell and even curses him when he outright tells her “no”.

Throws violent temper tantrums when things don’t go her way and destroys things.

Has deluded herself into thinking that Russia does want to marry her and dismisses his fearful reactions as stubbornness/“Tsundere behavior”.

Is completely on board with Russia’s desire to take over the world (which she misinterprets as "turn everyone into big brother’s slaves" rather than Russia’s real intentions [as fucked up and naive as they are], "being friends with everyone").

Has been bullying Lithuania since childhood even though he loves her and has repeatedly broken his fingers and legs.

Has been implied to have done questionable things to the Baltics ("Today, I played around with___. It’s interesting to see what expressions he makes when I do such things to him").

Isn’t above hurting animals. Got into a fight with a cat simply because it was “in big brother’s way”.

Has done an impression of the stereotypical "Imōto-chan trope" in an attempt to "persuade" her brother into marriage (I know it's minuscule compared to what I've already mentioned, but the fact that she just blatantly assumes that Russia is the kind of person who would be into that is just...ew).

Held Liechtenstein in a chokehold when asked to interact with her.

Actually likes her authoritarian jackass of a boss and has made a fansite of him (the only other person she’s done this for is Russia, which is saying a lot).

Silent calls people out of spite.

Has stolen, smelled, and worn her brother's underwear on her head as a nightcap.

Takes invasive photos of Russia without his knowledge or consent.

Constantly ruins and/or breaks down Russia's doors.

Leaves scratch marks on Russia's property as a hobby.

Has indecent, sexual fantasies about her brother.

Has used physical force on Russia (ie. crushing his arm) to get him to marry her and showed zero remorse over hurting him.

Has an entire Hetastagram (Instagram) account called ‘Daily Big Brother’, where she praises, stalks, and publicly posts photos of Russia online without his consent (and I’m willing to bet that some of them were the suggestive ones I mentioned earlier).

Overall, not a good person. A brat, even.

Belarus is one of those characters that I adore aesthetically. I love her design (have you seen her in a ponytail?), I occasionally do voice impressions of her for fun and I’m always ecstatic when I discover canon information about her. Hell, I have an entire document dedicated to canon descriptions of her physical appearance just to cosplay her (I’ve been wanting to cosplay Bela for a very long time).

But at the same time I know for a fact that, if I knew her in real life, I would absolutely hate her guts.

I already don't like her as a person, and I know I said this is about her personality specifically, but I especially don't like her as a personification of a country that's already been going through hell just to keep its independence (and it's even more gross and insulting in real life knowing that it's Russia that's out to take away Belarus' national autonomy).

Belarus' obsession with Russia does influence most of her bad traits. He's not, by any means, a good influence.

However, she fails to recognize his many fatal faults and misinterprets what he wants as malicious world domination and enslavement, which she's concerningly more than happy to indulge.

She sees Russia as this idealized, flanderized version of himself. She sees him as something to praise and revere, as this brooding, merciless god-on-earth who's righteous in every way. To put it into perspective, the way she sees Russia is very similar to how the fandom saw him during the 2010s and sometimes still sees him today.

She doesn't really know her brother or even see him as his own person. Sure, she can name every location he's ever been to, is obnoxiously protective of him, and knows his pinky toe turns red when he's embarrassed, but she doesn't know who he is as a person. His likes, dislikes, what he wants, and especially, what he doesn't want. She likes the idea of him and just makes assumptions from there without any input or consent.

Belarus won't acknowledge it, but to her, Russia is essentially a doll. Just a target. An object to keep, project, and force her affection onto.

And this isn't the same as Russia doing harmful things out of a lack of understanding of how the world works. This isn't the same as Russia being cognitively unaware of everyone's fear of him.

No. Bela knows exactly what she’s doing. She knows better than to be doing what she’s doing. But she indulges anyway simply because she lacks impulse control. And from the looks of it, it's deliberate.

And the worst part about all this? She’s never been held accountable for her actions. Not once does someone reprimand her or call her out for her shitty behavior and, if anything, it’s enabled.

Russia can't bring himself to tell her off or get rid of her (out of both familial love and fear), which only makes matters worse since Bela's fanatical dumbass will only assume that his lack of action means that he approves of her behavior.

But it's not like what Russia does matters anyway because if he even tries to put her down (gently or otherwise) and behaves outside of her idealized version of him, she'll just throw a shit fit and make him more miserable. He's forever stuck in this vicious cycle until he's drained from her antics and finally gives in to what she wants.

And the reason(s) why other people let her get away with the shit she pulls is because:

They're also scared of her.

She’s a female nation, and no one tells female nations what to do.

"She’s just so cute!” (PrettyPrivilege™️).

The closest thing she’s ever gotten to a ‘reality check’ was in that 2011 Halloween comic. When Denmark casually brushes off her usual attempts at intimidation.

And laughs to her face for even trying in the first place.

(Denmark, you’re wonderful, don’t ever change)

Belarus is implied to be lonely and has had a rough upbringing like her siblings, leaving her with a pessimistic view of life and relationships. She's tried to break away from Russia once (I imagine her bosses at the time forced her to) and lived with America, who also got tired of her antics and tried to get rid of her as well. This would explain a lot of her obsessive, co-dependent behavior and, by all accounts, is enough to garner some form of sympathy.

However, the reason why Bela is lonely is that she's actively choosing to cling to one person. She pushes all of her projections and issues onto Russia, further isolating him while not giving a single flying fuck over how her actions affect him and those around her.

And even when there are other people who love and care about her unconditionally (for some reason), she’s dismissive and a complete bitch to them. She takes those relationships for granted and only ever indulges them if it serves some sort of benefit to her (usually as a means of getting closer to Russia).

As if the fact that she's indulging in incestuous fantasies isn't bad enough, she's making active attempts to make them a reality and giving no regard over how her target feels. She takes time out of her day to intentionally hurt others who dare to disagree. The fact that there are other people who care about her and want her to be happy means nothing to her. It's painfully frustrating to watch.

Even traits that should be positive (strength and passion) are manifested in negative ways. She's been noted to be talented and has so much potential. But instead, she chooses to waste said potential in favor of being...this.

So long story short, Belarus is the kind of person who will never be happy. Regardless if she magically gets what she wants in the end.

I've said this before and I'll say it again: I absolutely love it when the fandom goes the extra mile to expand on her character. She's shrouded in mystery and could have at least one positive trait for all we know (unfortunately, that reveal's not gonna happen anytime soon).

I typically don't care for headcanons and this is one of the few exceptions. It's a breath of fresh air to see different interpretations of her character.

Man, Belarus. You bring out the worst in people.

And you're not putting in any effort to change that. To be a better version of yourself. Have you any self-respect?

So you must be happy with where you are. And if that's the case, then why should I, or anyone, feel bad?

I guess I see why I should be sorry for you, but I also see no point in wasting sympathy on someone who's content with being a shitty person.

Don't go out of your way to be a petty asshole and this wouldn't happen🤗

So yeah, Hetalia’s Belarus is not just a terrible person, but a poor, insulting personification of the country.

Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.

[eruverse]

Tag Game To Better Know You! Send this to people you’d like to know better!

Tagged by @tianshiisdead thank youuu 🌞

What book are you currently reading?

I should finish The Secret History of the Mongols… I generally don’t read books because my reading focus is abysmal lol. I read what I want to read exactly at that moment and immediately jump to other things I want to know about, so it’s rare that I finish thick books.

What’s your favorite movie you saw in theaters this year?

Since the pandemic happened I have never visited one lol. But in general I also don’t really watch movies.

What do you usually wear?

Long dresses. Also I usually wear hijab to meet people I know. My clothes have to be comfortable and easily manageable, if not I get grumpy easily. I’m also rather particular about sleeves because one of my pet peeves is long sleeves catching on food and I dislike white because I have to really take care not to stain it.

How tall are you?

151 cm 🌞

What’s your Star Sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event?

Do you go by your name or a nick-name?

Irl I go by my birth name but I have a nickname around family.

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child?

Nooo lol. But now I want to have a plot of land I can garden in.

Are you in a relationship? If not, who is your crush if you have one?

Single and ready to mingle. Mongolia is my crush, tell me where I can find a guy like him.

What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at?

I have a very good intrapersonal skill and bad at people’ing. I’m quite asocial and still discovering social norms and dynamic at my age lol.

Dogs or cats?

Cats.

What’s something you would like to create content for?

I’m already making contents for what I like. Usually only make contents for what I really like also.

If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favorite picture/favorite line/favorite etc. from something you created this year?

Is it bad to admit that I really love my drawing style? I think I have a unique drawing style that people can hardly find anywhere but in mine, and I work hard for it🌞 My coloring though needs Work. But I both am kinda afraid of color and in principle dislike it compared to creating shapes.

I used to have shoujo artstyle. This year my drawing style has changed rapidly, and I was told now my artstyle looks josei. I am very pleased with this development 🌞

I also love my oc designs. I care a Lot and work very hard on them.

Contentwise if it doesn’t pass at least 80% of my current standards I’m not releasing it. Comics and writings tho, doodles not included.

What’s something you’re currently obsessed with?

What I personally call trifecta; in Hetalia, Mongolia-Kazakhstan-Russia. Or what I also call Russia and his Boobs. I think about them everyday.

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?

My thesis. God I hate school.

What’s a hidden talent of yours?

Designing clothes. But unlike gardening I don’t find much value in designing, even though I quite like it, so I guess it’ll stay mostly unexplored but we’ll see in the future.

Are you religious?

I am a believer. But I’m a Muslim who doesn’t actually pray, so… 💦 but I fast, don’t eat pork and other kinds of forbidden meat, and don’t consume alcohol. But another reason I don’t drink is also for a fear that I might stab people. What if I’m a crazy drunk? So I guess in general I’m actually pretty religious.

On praying: it’s laziness usually, don’t copy me please.

What’s something you wish to have at this moment?

Always, always wish for more courage, more and more courage.

Tagging: @flyingmerdekaman @cookieshower @mongolmaral @justknocking @ariuka-munkh only if you really want to tho!! No pressure!!

[questioned-quetzalcoatl]

Call me Satan, Darling. Part 8

Rating: T

Parings: New Zealand/Tonga (Hetalia)

Characters: New Zealand, Tonga, Denmark, Philippines, Lithuania, Estonia

Variation: Demon/Human AU

Summary: When Kainga, an exchange student from Tonga, travels to New Zealand for his studies, he expects all to go well. It does. All except getting hit by a car by Satan himself, who also happens to be his seductive roommate. Kainga finds himself slowly falling for the devil after his declaration of love. Because nothing truly says ‘I love you’ more than being run off the road by a rusty old Ute.

AN: So, second to last chapter. It's been a hell (lmao) of a ride writing this but the first fic in this series is nearing a close. Two more characters added here, probably the last ones as I don't want it to get overwhelming for myself and readers uwu;;

I want to thank you all for sticking by with me and my sporadic updates, the support matters to me no matter how big or small it is. Now, expect the unexpected (ノ・∀・)ノ

Tolys - Lithuania Eduard - Estoina

Also available on AO3 and Wattpad!

Contents: [Chapter 1]

[Chapter 2]

[Chapter 3]

[Chapter 4]

[Chapter 5]

[Chapter 6]

[Chapter 7]

[Chapter 8]

[Chapter 9]

"I came as soon as I got your message. How is he?"

Densen stood at the doorway, leaning forward slightly while blocking the entrance with either hand on each side of the doorframe. Like he was protecting something inside his house. Piri was standing in front of him, Densen being the only thing stopping him from entering.

"Do...you want me to answer that honestly?"

"Well yes, but from the tone of your voice it doesn't sound too good."

Densen lowered his head not even making eye contact with Piri. He let out a deepened sigh, from that alone Piri knew things had gone south since he'd received that text from Densen that morning. In reality, he didn't know what he was expecting from the situation as a whole. Neither of them knew what had happened.

"Look, he just showed up this morning. Poor guy could hardly talk through sobbing. He sounded like he was in pain, what was causing it I couldn't tell. It was too dark and I was half asleep letting him in. From what I gathered, he just needed a place to stay. Somewhere that wasn't his own apartment. It's all very odd."

"Well he came to your house, completely away from our apartment block. If it was his apartment in particular he would've come to mine. Something must've spooked him really bad."

"Do you think someone broke in? Maybe attacked him? Auckland city isn't exactly the safest place on Earth." Densen spoke quietly.

Piri just shook his head. "I don't know. It's best we don't assume either. Is he stable enough to talk to? We can ask him what happened."

Densen stood to the side of the doorframe, letting the Filipino pass him before closing the door. The sound of the door locking behind him by Densen only made the atmosphere more unnerving.

"Where is he?"

"Passed out on the couch, under all the blankets and pillows. I let him crash there, but I suggest he moves before my mum comes home. She'd go nuts if there was some guy asleep on her sofa. It's expensive Danish furniture too."

Piri looked at Densen before slowly approaching the lump under the blankets on Densen's couch. There was shuffling from below it, evident of life. That was one less thing Piri had to worry about. Both that he was alive and awake, having not suffocated under the weighted blanket on top of him. Piri sat down on the end of the couch, two feet that stuck out from the end of the blanket soon retreating back inside of it.

"Kainga?"

No response could be heard from the Tongan under the blankets. Just silence. Not even a strain of words like he was trying to even speak to them from the weightiness both with his situation. Of course, he'd fallen in love with Satan. James had known from the beginning he’d have to kill himself, at least from the beginning of them having their thing, whatever that was. What did you even call it? Dating Satan could never be referred to as just ‘dating Satan’ and the more he thought about it, the more his life sounded like a young adult fiction.

In all honesty, he thought about leaving. Leaving it all behind, James, the stink of the City of Sails, his education and this godforsaken country.

In all honesty, he was way too tempted with the idea that James gave to him but now it wasn't for James. Killing himself, for himself. The thought of having to deal with James with the rest of his afterlife stopped him dead in his tracks however, because like fuck he was going to Heaven. He'd fucked Satan, whatever God there was out there would most likely strike him down than be of any assistance to him.

The more he even thought about it, the worse it became. That's when he started to shift and move from under the blankets with the sheer congested shame it gave him.

"Kainga are you okay?"

Piri found himself repeating, what else was he supposed to say? He didn't know about anything the Tongan had been through. Even why he'd chosen to come to Densen's house of all places. He was there to comfort him, be a shoulder to cry on like a good friend would be.

Kainga finally revealed himself, his eyes red and puffy against the mess of curly brown hair. Looking like he'd just woken up with his eyes adjusting to the Filipino in front of him. His head poked out from the blanket, finally letting his gaze settle on Piri who was sat smiling gently at him from the other end of the couch.

"Piri?"

He finds it hard to explain everything to them. Even in the retelling it hurts him to say anything about it, think about it was painful enough. He did what he could, despite the incoherencies during his occasional breakdowns and saddened pauses. Taking this opportunity to take it all in himself. What James had said, what he did. The scorch marks on his door, the wound on his arm that had hesitantly scabbed over most of it. Tears gently falling off his rosy cheeks, every tear clinging to his eyelashes and all he could do was look down at his hands.

Piri and Densen both listened to what he had to say. About what happened. What James had done to him, they couldn't help feel angry. This time, Kainga did nothing to defend him. He just couldn't, unable to even decipher how he felt about him now. His hands shook as they held comfortably in each other.

Piri was furious.

"I knew he was bad news. I knew it! Now look what that bastard's done to Kainga!"

"Piri come on now, try to stay calm. Kainga's already shaken up enough."

"How do you expect me to stay calm?! I knew as soon as I saw him he was a fucking snake! He's hurt him don't you see?!"

Kainga could only look up at the two. He hated feeling helpless, nervously gripping at the edges of his mug. Filled with Densen's recipe of Danish coffee to wake him up fully. What had he done, what had he gotten himself into? His arm still burned, festering like dying embers on his flesh.

"I'm thinking of going home." He said rather suddenly, it was hasty. He didn't really know where he was going with this, one thing he knew was that he missed his home. Tonga. Maybe that was it, just being homesick. Piri and Densen soon stopped, staring right at him again. There was a short silence, mainly at the suddenness of Kainga's words. How unexpected it was.

"Home? You mean, home home? Like back to Tonga?" Piri finally asked.

Kainga just nodded, still looking down and away from the both of them. Nuku'alofa was his home, Tonga's capital and biggest city. It wasn't even really a city, more of a Port. The main international airport was stationed just outside the capital at the town of Fua'amotu. Where he had taken off from before he arrived here, where he'd hugged and waved his parents goodbye. He just missed it even more now by thinking about it.

What would they think? His parents. It didn't help that is father was a raging Christian. He often helped out at the local churches and Tonga certainly had plenty of those. All the missionaries he'd meet when they arrived to 'The Friendly Islands'. Kainga always snorted a little at that nickname for his country. While it was true, Tonga was known for its gentle and peaceful nature, Kainga never exactly fit the bill.

If his father ever found out about his own child 'dating' Satan himself, he'd suffer something probably worse than death. He'd be at the mercy of his ill-tempted religious father.

“You’re cutting it a bit close aren’t you? The new semester starts in 3 weeks, Kai." Densen lowered his voice.

“I know, I should be back end of next week, I’m just a little homesick. It's not like I'm going across the world, it's only about a 2 hour flight from here to Nuku'alofa.”

Kainga ignored the worried look from the Dane's paler face. Focusing his attention down on his phone as he searches for direct flights, only to find it now out of battery. Ironic.

If he had not been so miserable, he would've laughed.

---

He still can't decide anything for himself. He felt empty, a shamed void of a man. Temptations of everything, death and escaping all washing over him as he remained indecisive on his situation. How could be possibly miss him now and somehow even more than before. Perhaps because now he knew he was gone, probably for good.

It was all his fault too.

He really couldn't help putting the blame onto himself. He was a fool, an idiot to trust him. He couldn't just kill himself now. No, not that, he’d promised himself he wouldn’t do that and he went and did it, with Satan of all people, anyway, the anger he felt towards himself finally coming undone and exploding as it mixed in with the mess of emotions he was feeling with an almighty scream as he blurted out what he’d been so reluctant to admit these past few months.

"I FELL IN LOVE WITH SATAN AND WE BOTH FUCKED IT UP AND NOW HE ISN'T COMING BACK. ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?! YOU GIANT, HOLY SHIT!!!" He screams at the ceiling, glaring at it bitterly before slumping into his seat, sore throat and fighting back the new wave of tears the Tongan felt coming.

He was truly pathetic.

A pathetic mess who missed a man who tried to kill him. More than once too. Inwardly fighting with himself with such pain as he clawed at the sides of his body. Curse him, curse this body now plagued and sinful. He wanted it gone, destroyed without any trace left because he knew that it didn't even belong to him anymore. Ever since that night with James. When he touched him like he did, he way he wrapped himself around his mind and heart like a snake. When he kissed him in places even Kainga forgot he had, was it all just a lie? Blinded by what he thought was love, now blinded by tears.

He cried, he couldn't seem to stop. His blue sweater sleeves now damp from the constant wiping of tears that spilled from his eyes. A shame, he loved this sweater. Whenever he wore it he felt such inner comfort. It was a beautiful cobalt color, he'd bought the next size up by accident so it draped off his body ever so slightly. The sleeves would hang off his hands, leaving only his fingers to poke out of the sleeve holes. Made of soft merino wool with small woven sheep embroidered onto it in a pattern across the sweater.

Sighing heavily, he pulled his laptop off the coffee table and onto his lap. His eyes begin to dry up at last. The new term was starting soon, his first year of university; he had enough time to go home right? A couple of weeks at best, come back the week before term started. Maybe the change of scenery would help him, being at home back in Nuku'alofa, or as far away from Auckland as he possibly could be. Going home to see his family again, surely they didn't have to know of everything that had happened. If they asked, the Satan part could possibly be reworked and reworded. Although it'd further convince his mother firmly who already had a strong disliking for the people of New Zealand. She always said how rude and wild they were, too loud and rowdy for her liking. Saying he got his heart broken by one and he wouldn't hear the end of it from her.

For now he just had to stop thinking about James and think about Tonga. He looked down at his laptop, brushing his fingers over the singed edges from the fire in the library. Yet another thing to remind him of James.

Letting out a scream of frustration, Kainga picked the laptop up as if to throw it across the room out of anger but he decides that's something he just couldn't risk. Taking in a heavy breath he placed the computer back onto his lap. He turned it on as he calmed himself down, watching as it loaded back up.

His home screen was a picture of his dog back home, a Jack Russel Terrier called Rex. He'd been Kainga's best friend ever since he'd got the puppy for his 12th birthday. They'd practically grown up together and he loved his feisty little companion more than anything. It didn't take a genius to figure out how they got along so well. He thought about his mother, who'd try and convince him to stay in Tonga with them. It was only now he realized how much he really missed them.

With that, he started searching for the next available flights to Nuku'alofa he could afford.

Kainga wanted to die or go home, whatever came first.

---

When one thinks of Hell, it's usually all the same.

Matthew, weeping and wailing. The gnashing of teeth and unescapable darkness as ones sinful enough rotted in the eternal fire and punishment. The absence of God's presence, the floor becoming alight with more of the damned. A fiery lake of burning Sulphur.

“Serpents, brood of vipers! How can you escape the condemnation of Hell?”

Luke, flames and excruciating torment. A place of great pain, the worst kind of Hell is the one unique to the one who questions it.

"And in hell He lift up his eyes, being in torments. For I am tormented in this flame."

There is a place of fiery torment called Hell, where unsaved sinners will suffer punishment for all their sins forever. Fire like eyes and gaunt faces, screams of pain and anguish as all they can do is plead. An almost blinding fire as gnarled hands clawed at legs, dragging you down as starved hands pulled at clothes, hair and arms, nails ripping skin and cloth alike before teeth joined in the fray.

Some even think Hell would be spending an eternity ruled by an overlord who demands you constantly praise Him. It's not too far fetched.

"It is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched."

However one chooses to envision it, Hell may not be all that it seems. No. Hell is a parasite.

The problem with all these visions of Hell is that the torment never changes. No matter how horrific the torture, the tormented soul gets inured to the suffering. Sooner or later, it loses its power over the victim. But this Hell is one that is all too eerily familiar, we're unaware that Hell is no better than Earth itself.

The world as we now know it, every street, every landmark, everything that can be seen to the naked mortal eye like a flame. It has its own replica. The differences only arise in how twisted and dark the once comfortable world has become. You know what the most torturous thing about hell is?

Awareness.

The fact that you become aware that there is a loving God, who wanted to spend an eternity with you, and you made the conscious decision to reject His offer.

So Hell is an eternity of complete isolation from God. Imperfect and brooding. An existing parallel-like dimension that lingers just below the footsteps of its unsuspecting and unfortunate victims, created to succumb to their ultimate demise. Such a sad, pathetic reality. To live a life of suffering only to determine how much suffering will come next. Only a fool would refer to either option as a utopia or dystopia.

Cities and towns that inhabit Hell's twisted familiarity lingered over by a brewing storm of red, bedarkened and weeping. The clouds are churlish and kraken-cruel with a dark crimson. They cough out great gouts of flashing vermilion electrical currents. It teems down in a biblical deluge, it snaps and crackles like bracken pods in a bushfire. Loud cracks of thunder in the whirlpool of shrieking, keening omen of the carnage to follow within its blood red clouds. They drown out the screams with the cracking of red lightning across the tar like skies. The clouds race across the sky, thrumming with the charged energy they are desperate to release.

The storm is like a tyrant. Everlasting and ever continuing on with its screeching above. Its presence is so vast that it's the only natural light source Hell ever needs. Making everything below its thundering wake tinted with a tinctured cerise red.

Against the debauched and aberrant factors of it all, Hell does host life. Its maroon soil tattered with charcoal brush and undergrowth is further fed by the acidic rain fall that the hellish storm above them reaps onto the land. Torrential rainfall created an eco-system long ago where all the disgusting and vile creatures made from devilish hands roam the barren lands freely. Ones of repulsive beauty as loathsome beasts plague the wastelands of darkened deserts that lay just outside the cities and their walls.

The trees in the forest were malady-black. Grains of poison begrimed the bark and gleamed like witch dust. Packs of Hellhounds haunted the sooty coppices, salivating over their prey and smearing the blood over their heavy faces and gnarling jaws with rows of teeth. They feasted as a pack on their fresh kill, tearing and ripping at strands of meat from the carcass. The smell of the Caprae they'd killed was putrid. The decaying air and stifling atmosphere provided the perfect abode for those who worshipped the darkness rather than the light. In the dense shadows, spiders clutched their snare-strings. Their webs shimmered like meshed steel dipped in silver. Eyes a-flame with hunger, they were hoping to dine on bloated bodies and slurp on hot blood.

Stealthy scarves of the mist detached themselves, slowly glided in silence and coiled serpent-like around helpless limbs. Between the trees, wispy cobwebs threaded out like fibrous star-streak. They would be the sinewy tentacles of destruction for all those who would dare their tensile strength. Exhaling miasmas of rotting vapor rose up to meet the webs, while above, fevered eyes, glazed with hunger, waited among the endless damp. Cruel as those eyes were, they lacked the ferocity of the hunter’s eyes.

Centuries-old trees with sprawling limbs guarded the darkness, blotting out any light from the storm above. Their bark was mottled and splotched, as if bubbled soup had been frozen in time on its surface. Clumpy combs of wet moss dangled from their rotten boughs. Underneath the moss, lethal larkspur peppered the mulchy floor. A pungent tang oozed from every sentient being in the forest. Something loomed here, to let anyone that passed to know they're not welcome.

Everything considered edible in another forest was nauseating here. It left you with the same, sickening taste of your own blood. It was a forest to be avoided. It was truly a place to make your veins freeze over.

That's what Hell is truly like.

An eco-system that was livable to a degree, the demons down here had to adapt to the harshness of Hell's climate or they'd be left to rot. Their carcasses torn and dismantled by the beasts down here. It was kill or be killed and a lot like Earth, there was status. A social hierarchy of Demons.

The slave and peasant demons, slaving away for manufactures who'd taken it upon themselves to improve Hell's distribution of demonic goods. It was almost terrifying how similar Hell and Earth were, that they're one in the same. The constant balance, maybe Earth itself was the true evil that plagued itself and needed something or somewhere to blame for it all.

As it went up, the Working and Middle class demons and the Upper Middle class often worked for those in true power. The Final Class, the only class in Hell that has access to the mortal realm. The living world as his oyster, King and ruler of Hell. Satan himself.

James couldn't help but glare at the both of them. Stood in front of him on his throne, cowering like sheep to be slaughtered at the foot of the stairs. Hearing the news that his advisors had failed to comply in what he'd ordered them to do, his lips curled into a sickening snarl. The internal flames that burned within his eyes flickered with a overbearing sense of inhuman like dread, causing a soft glow like that of a candle being burnt in its wick.

"What do you mean, you couldn't find him."

The grueling voice of Satan echoed throughout the dimly lit hall. A terrible like sneer that drilled into your very soul, enough to make any creature freeze itself from trepidation.

His advisors only quivered more, too scared to dare say anything. They exchanged looks of distress before one stepped forward. Tolys, a Lithuanian demon, took the stand to the first stair step that lead up to Hell's throne. The tormented screams of the victims seared his soul. He was kinless and kith-less, with neither family nor friend, yet he had been smelted in the fiery forge of violence since he was a child. He thought he was no longer afraid and when face to face with Satan, how wrong he was. The blood-lust was upon him, a familiar feeling. He cleared his voice, that tinge of nervousness in his voice ever more present as he spoke to the mighty King of Hell who was royalty pissed off at the two.

"My Lord, we searched the entire city. There was no one who matched your Queen's description-"

"LIES!!!" James boomed above the two, leaning forward now off his throne seat now. Tolys recoiled away from him, almost tripping and falling off the step in his groveling.

"S-sir, please understand...! We've been looking for days now! He's nowhere to be found!"

"Did you check everywhere?! The apartment?! The campus?! He can't have gone far without my knowledge!!!"

James screaming at them to find his missing Queen like he hadn't of just done it himself. Sending his lackeys out to find him was evident of a very poorly handled situation, then again he run the risk. Risking his relationship with the Tongan like he hadn't just tried to kill him a few weeks prior. He knew Kainga well, knowing he didn't dare show his face near him after what happened. Like poking a sleeping bear with a stick, he just had to be careful.

Tolys found himself stammering once more. They knew all too well what James was truly capable of.

"Yes, we checked everywhere he could possibly be."

The New Zealander sends his advisors a withering look as he sits back down in on his throne. Not having expected for both of them to regard his plan with little to no promise, the Lithuanian was not one to disobey him. He didn't dare to, nor Tolys or Eduard dared to even usher words that James did not want to hear.

"I am not. I repeat NOT, giving you two such important access to the living world if yer going to return to me and tell me you didn't find my Queen. Return to me empty handed again and you will both suffer my wrath, do I make myself clear?!"

Tolys could only stare at him. Watching the King of Hell as he rested his cheek in his palm, leaning across his throne in a rather arrogant slouch. His tail swaying behind him when he expected an answer from his advisor. He finally spoke up in a meek voice.

"Yes my Lord. I swear we'll return to you with your Queen's location."

Tolys bowed to him quickly. More out of fear than respect. James smirked to himself against his own searing palm as his advisors basically tripped over themselves as they scrambled out of the Throne Hall. He knew that Kainga wouldn't be able to get far. If so, he wouldn't let him, he wouldn't let him get away from him.

Oh his Queen could run, but he certainly couldn't hide.

---

“Are you sure you’re just homesick? Are you sure it’s not because of…”

“Yes, I’m sure, I just miss Nuku'alofa. Don’t you miss Copenhagen sometimes?”

Kainga cuts him off sharply before the Dane could finish his sentence. Before he can even say the name, bringing all the surging memories back at the event or the man who caused it all. A small laugh escaping his lips as he spots Densen's face curling up in the rear view mirror as if he was figuring out whether he missed his home city or not. Auckland's traffic was as treacherous as always, what was meant to be about a 19 minute drive was now about an hour of sitting in the line of cars that seemed to never end. Kainga sighed heavily and leaned back in his seat to gaze out the window of the stationary car. Densen was kind enough to give him a lift to the airport, he didn't even feel safe catching the bus. Not after what happened. Whether that thing was real or not, he couldn't risk anything.

Of course, he was dodging the radar of Satan himself. But once he's in Tonga, he's sure there's plenty of churches for him to hide in. With a country as religious as it was, they'd be coming at James in mobs with torches ablaze and pitchforks sharpened. Kainga couldn't help but snort a little at the thought.

"Are you sure you're going to be alright? I can't help but worry for you, you know."

"Hey, Den, I'm going to be fine okay? It's only for a week or so, I'll be back before you know it. And you have Piri and Tino still."

"Yeah I know. It's just with all that's happened. You certainly haven't got the best luck in the world."

Even when Densen attempts to make light hearted jabs to ease the tension, that twang of nervousness in his voice always throws him off. Like the plucking of an untuned guitar string. How much Densen is really worried for him, he finds it uncomfortably humbling.

Kainga's nose wrinkled up slightly, the splatters of dark freckles on his tanned nose and cheeks moving up along with it. "I'll send you updates if you're that worried about me."

"Alright, sounds good. But you have to bring us something back from Tonga. Like when Tino went home to Finland and brought us back those little Moomintroll plushies. I still have mine, it's sat on my bed post." Densen grinned widely as he met Kainga's gaze in the rear view mirror when he looked back at him. Kainga felt his face heat up, just a little.

"Yeah yeah I will don't worry, probably won't be as special as Moomintroll but I'll do my best." he returned Densen's beam with a rather watery smile. "There's tons of tourist gift shops around everywhere, it's a pretty big industry. I know of a cute little gift shop in Kanokupolu, might stop over for a haul for you guys."

His arrival at Auckland airport seems to evoke the same dreadful feelings he'd had for the past few weeks. He remembers it like it was yesterday as he stood at the entrance. The heat haze that caused him to disorientate, loosing his vision in the blazing sun. Reaching for what looked to be a taxi before all he saw was the dirty hood of a Holden Ute. Speeding towards him like something from a Fast and Furious movie.

Even the thought of it now made him sick to his stomach.

That was the day he couldn't help but regret when it all flooded back to him. So much so that he sort of wished it'd happen again, with a different driver or not was debatable. It'd gotten to the point in his life that he got disappointed whenever he saw some car go ever so over the speed limit, almost expecting it to be that Ute. Because the disappointment of it not being James was getting too much. And with Kiwi drivers, it was all too common to see some reckless bastard packing the rounds down every street he passed. No matter the speed limit, they clearly weren't as respected as much down here.

He found himself clutching his backpack straps with such force that it made his hands shake and his knuckles turn white. His suitcase sat beside him as he stood there contemplating his entire life up until this point. He remembered his past self's own sheer excitement touching down in Auckland, if he could see him now he bet he'd be disappointed with Kainga's decision to go back.

Like he said, it was only for a few weeks. He'd be alright. He prayed.

Finally bringing himself to extend his suitcase's handle before grabbing onto it, he merely waved back over his shoulder at Densen who was still sat in his car. Beeping the horn at him until Kainga gave him a response. Densen could feel the unclarity radiating off the Tongan, when he was stood staring at the entrance of the airport like it was a haunted house, Densen knew that not even Kainga really knew what he was doing. Only succeeding in making them both more nervous as Kainga disappeared into the crowds of people.

At this early hour the airport is as serene as it ever is. The people move with ease, quiet rivers of humanity freshly roused from their slumber. The floors are clean and white, reflecting the early rays and the manmade light the same. The squeaking of rusty airport carts could be heard being pushed around the floors, its all very fast paced for his liking. Surprisingly enough, he's fairly early. Having about an hour or so left until his flight departs, maybe he should ease off some stress before his flight. Air travel, or just travel in general has never been his favorite thing ever.

Rechecking his belongings and passport while he waited by a nearby café, ensuring that he hadn't left anything behind. Of course he checked before he'd got here prior but Kainga loved to be fully organized and prepared. He got lucky in the instance that it was rather quiet today, his claustrophobia probably couldn't take on a fully packed airport. Even having this whole thing planned out in his head, grab some coffee and food, pass security then head to the terminal. Show his passport, get on the plane then boom, he was out of this hellhole. Quickly taking his coffee and pie as he thanked the clerk kindly and went to sit down at the seating area. The smell of the sloppy meat pie caused him to judder a little, No, he couldn't be reminded. Not now when he was so close to personal freedom.

Yet no matter how hard he tried as he walked through the airport, he couldn't shake that feeling. The feeling of being watched by something, or someone. Goosebumps trickled along his neck when his blood ran cold. This time, he couldn't explain it but, it felt like two pairs of eyes. Maybe even more. Watching him from all directions until he became dizzy with the feeling. His breath got sharp like the life was being sucked out of him from pure fear. Soon shaking it off, he started to calm himself down. Telling himself that it was all in his head.

He knew all too well that James was very much going to be the death of him, figuratively or literally. For now he just had to keep himself together.

---

Arriving home at Fuaʻamotu International Airport and taking a taxi into the capital. Watching out the window as he saw the passing palm trees and overall familiar landscape of Tonga. For once, he felt relief. Like all his worries disappeared once he was back to his home country. Traveling the costal roads that lined across the islands, watching the resplendent afternoon sunlight with an unwavering gaze on the tip of the Pacific sea that seemed to stretch out forever. The waves were calm and harmonious against the sands with crepuscular rays shading the atmosphere across the dunes. He was home.

His serene and content ambience only lasted until the taxi pulled up in front of his parents house. Thanking the driver, he gathered his stuff out. Preparing himself mentally to face his parents again.

She’d been as overbearing as he had imagined. 3 days since he’d arrived, 3 days of questions about why he hadn’t been answering the phone when she rang, why he seemed quieter than usual, the usual worry filled questions from a concerned mother whose son had left for New Zealand 9 months ago all smiles and cheer but had returned, out of the blue, unable to even fake a smile.

His fathers absence explained as he was away on his missions trip with the church, that was one bullet dodged for now. Still he dreaded seeing him again with the mere thought of him finding out about his dating Satan situation. He was barely surviving under the constant questions from his worried mother over the breakfast table. Picking at his now soggy cereal, he didn't feel like eating. Not even now.

"Kai, please eat something sweetie. I haven't seen you eat anything since you got here."

"I ate something yesterday, Fa'ē." he referred to his mother in his native tongue to try and throw her off. He was unsuccessful and she only continued on.

"I'm not letting you leave this house until you eat something Kainga, what on earth is the matter with you?"

"Nothing, Mum, like I said before I'm fine."

"I can tell when you're lying to me Kainga Lynley Tukuafu, you've showed up back here out of absolutely nowhere and you can't even force yourself to smile at me."

Kainga curled his lip in plain annoyance. Mainly at the fact he was reminded that his middle name was Lynley.

"Look, I just didn't have a great time okay?" he slumped against his chair in defeat. Giving up on picking at the cereal, only to be met by the disapproving stare of his mother. Making him hurriedly start to eat it. "I'm only here for two weeks then I'm going back to Auckland to finish my exams. I just...felt a little homesick."

She gave him a troubled look but decided to leave her son be until he was ready to perhaps go into more detail. Noticing Rex under the table, looking up at Kainga hopefully with his little tail wagging sharply against the wooden floor. "I believe your dog wants a walk Kai, why don't you take him around town? Maybe down to the port, he has really missed you."

Kainga lazily trailed his eyes down to the excited look the Jack Russel Terrier was giving him from below the breakfast table. The small dog was practically vibrating with excitement and anticipation for a walk from his favorite owner.

"Jeez Mum, did ya not walk him? He looks like he's about to bounce off the walls. Or piss himself-"

"Language!" she snapped at him quickly. Kainga lowered his head a little before she continued on. "Oh I did, but you know how much he likes your walks." She gave him a soft reassuring smile. Kainga sighed and sat up from the table, pushing the chair back before going to find his shoes and Rex's collar and leash. Rex following after him with loud yaps, his claws could be heard skidding along the wooden floor when he followed him like a shadow. Might as well make the most of the sun before winter starts to set in. As much as he loved Tonga, he despised the tropical storms that the island brought on.

He’d thought coming here would make him feel better but he can’t say it had, coming home to a place that didn’t feel like home anymore, stuck in a homeless limbo where neither of his residencies felt like his own anymore. Shaking his head, Kainga just figured he’s putting too much thought into it. He walked Rex along the dirt roads that led into the capital's main town. Still remembering the way to go from when he'd walked Rex before. The sides of the roads boasted lush undergrowth that flourished in Tonga's tropical climate. Woven in along the roadside where ferns and fronds, pineapple bushes, and banana trees sagging under the weight of fruit. Coconut palm trees loomed over top of him, giving shade as they gently swayed in the breeze. Causing their shadows to dance down below along the costal vegetation.

Rex started to tug on his leash a little, the rope tightening around Kainga's hand before he was pulled forward with the Terrier's force. "Alright alright! I'm coming, would you slow it down Rex?" he snapped at the dog before he could fall face first into the dusty sidewalk. Rex obeyed, coming to his heel when they passed a pasture of farmland. Barricaded off by tattered wooden fence and wires to stop the sheep running out onto the road. A few sheep where already out grazing, one reared it's head up to bleat at him rather loudly as they passed.

Pausing to catch his breath, leaning on his knees and ignoring the slight pain in his hip that had been present since he’d been knocked down 9 months ago, thankful that it was still too early for most people to be out and about to see him as out of breath as this. Still, it was embarrassing. Slowly straightening up, hesitating as he caught sight of the central capital's district, a distant blot on the horizon but even from here the sheer height of everything was clear. The words James had nervously spoken came speeding back to mind, the brunet chewed on his lower lip as he got lost in his thoughts of the New Zealander only to be yanked out of them as Rex whined and started pulling again. It only dawned on him now that, if James was Satan then there was also an opposed Heaven in existence too. After all, Satan could not exist without Heaven, making his fathers strictly religious lifestyle seem a lot less insane than Kainga had thought previously.

It was a strange feeling, the thought of a Heaven perhaps scaring him more than the thought of a Hell did. Probably because he'd fallen in love with its King and-

Great, he was thinking about him again. Lost in thought when Rex pulled him back down to the capital below. Back down the beaten track of flourishing bush and Rex finally off his lead, scampering ahead to the bakery in town he could probably smell. Some proper breakfast for them both wouldn't hurt, Kainga thought as he smiled and picked up his pace to keep up with the dog. Only increasing when he decided to let him run off down the dirt tracks of the hills that surrounded Nuku'alofa. Had he really slowed down that much or was his dog really that impatient? He had no idea but the dog had best be pleased now, Kainga having to all but jog to keep up with him now. Somehow managing a smile, a real smile when he chased after Rex for another adventure around the capital.

There was a rustling from the trees they passed however, not something like a bird or a Fruit bat that inhabited the islands. It was much bigger, a humanoid like figure that caught sight of Kainga through the thick leaves of the Frangipani tree. Eyes flared as they both watched on like a Gargoyle would on top of its tower of stones. One turned to the other in the same fashion a large dark owl would, turning a almost fully 180° to meet the other. Smirking at each other, clearly victorious when Tolys spoke up.

"Bring the news to the King, we've found his little Queen."

[thatsamericano]

Careful, Throwing Snowballs May Result in a Kiss

Pairing/Characters: America/Romano. Background mentions of Seborga, Veneziano, Canada, and France.

Ratings/Warnings: T for cursing and mildly suggestive dialogue. Pure fluff with no warnings to speak of.

Word Count: 2103

Summary: America throws a snowball at Romano when he’s trying to build a snowman with his brothers. Once Romano tackles America, he has to decide what he wants to do with him.

A/N: Written for @hetalia-fanart-memes, who requested Romerica with the prompt “Don’t throw that snowball” on @helltalia-inc. I hope you enjoy this.

It was snowing in the park only a block away from where the nations had gathered for the world meeting. Romano was never the biggest fan of the cold, so if it had been up to him, he would have gone straight back to the hotel.  He was looking forward to taking a flight back to Rome the next day, where he hopefully wouldn’t be dealing with this snow crap. In the unlikely event that it was snowing in Rome, Romano would go to Naples or another city in South Italy not affected as strongly by the winter.

But for today, Marcello, who had come along on this trip with Savino and Feliciano even if he couldn’t attend the official conference, had practically begged Savino to come build a snowman with him after the meeting. Feliciano had begged too, and under the force of two sets of puppy dog eyes, Savino had folded like a paper napkin.

This wasn��t so bad, Romano reflected. Sure, it was cold as shit, but he was relatively protected in his scarf, hat, and gloves, and he got to spend time with his brothers. At least he hadn’t been pelted with a snowball, which many of the nations had, thanks to America and Canada.

Romano glanced up when he heard France fussing about his appearance as he attempted to brush snow out of his hair. America, who was obviously the one who had thrown this particular snowball, was laughing in his usual obnoxiously bright, ridiculously loud, attention getting way. So, of course Savino turned to glance in that direction instead. He didn’t really have another choice.

Savino hated how his heart started pounding as soon as he looked at Alfred. It wasn’t fair, damn it. No one should look that handsome while just fucking standing there, hunched over a little as they laughed at their own joke like they were God’s gift to comedy. Alfredo was laughing so hard at himself that his cerulean eyes were narrowed into thin slits and tears were leaking from the corners. The sunlight reflected off his glasses, creating a bright light Savino couldn’t manage to look away from. Alfred’s grin was so big it could swallow the sky whole.

And the bastard had dimples, as if God hadn’t blessed him with too much beauty already. Savino wanted to kiss the corner of the idiota’s mouth, just to feel those dimples under his own lips. Savino swallowed heavily at the thought and told himself to focus on the snowman he’d been working on for the past half hour.

But he was too late. America’s smile had already softened, and he had already noticed that Romano was looking at him.

“What’s up, Little Italy? You feel like joining in on the snowball fight?”

Savino scoffed and forced himself to go back to reshaping his snowman’s head. “Hardly. As you can see, I’m busy at the moment.”

“Are you suuure? It could be a lot of fun.”

“If you want to go run around with America, that’s fine,” Seborga told him. “I wouldn’t mind.”

Romano wasn’t looking at his baby brother. He was looking at America, because he knew that mischievous tone of voice from back when they lived together, and he knew that Alfred was planning something. Fredo was never good at subtlety.

America was rolling a snowball together in his gloved hands with a smirk on his face. Because of course he was.

“I swear to God, if you throw that fucking snowball at me—”

The snowball went sailing through the air, and it hit him square in the chest. Savino was stumbled backwards a little, because Alfred had used way too much fucking force with that throw because of his super-strength. It wasn’t enough to really hurt him, but it was almost enough to knock him off his feet.

The sounds of laughter rang out around him. Alfred, of course, and Feli and Marcello nearby. Canada seemed to be chuckling, though he was too quiet for Romano to actually hear him, and so were the other nations nearby, even the ones like France who had been America’s snowball victims.

And that just wouldn’t fucking stand.

Romano glared at America as viciously as he could manage when he was more irritated than truly pissed off. “Now you’re gonna get it, stronzo!”

Alfred took off running, shrieking with laughter, and Savino chased after him. They ran for a couple minutes, because America could be pretty fast when he wanted to be. But he couldn’t outpace an Italian.

Eventually, Savino tackled him in a snowbank and fell right on top of him. If America had really wanted to get away, Romano would have had no hope of holding him down. But America wasn’t struggling. He relaxed back against the snowy ground, panted for air, and smiled up at Romano sheepishly.

“Looks like you caught me.”

“I guess I did.” Savino moved one of his hands to the side to gather up some snow in his palm. Alfred didn’t notice. He was still too busy grinning up at him.

Alfred giggled, because apparently, he found the idea of being in this position inherently hilarious for God knows what reason. “Now that you have me, what are you gonna do with me?”

Savino gazed down at him thoughtfully. He took a moment to examine the golden blond hair tousled underneath his knit cap and how it perfectly framed his rosy cheeks. He stared at the goofy smile and the electric blue eyes that had distracted him so thoroughly before. He memorized what it felt like to have Alfred’s firm, solid body laid out underneath him.

“I can think of a few things,” Savino admitted quietly. “Not all of them would be appropriate for a public park.”

Alfred’s eyes widened comically behind his glasses, and his face turned red. No, not just red, practically scarlet. His face practically matched the poinsettias that had been decorating the lobby of the office building they were in earlier today. “Vinny, that’s um, that’s, wow, I…”

Romano chuckled at how flustered and tongue-tied he was. “Do you want me to kiss you?”

Alfred nodded frantically, with a desperate look in his eyes. “Please.” He might have been embarrassed, but he was eager too. It was too adorable for Savino to resist.

He started to lean down, and America closed his eyes, because he was innocent and gullible enough to do that. He couldn’t see Romano’s arm lifting with the snowball he’d make earlier. A millisecond before their lips touched, Romano shoved the snowball he’d made earlier directly into the crook of America’s neck, right above his coat collar and scarf, where he was unprotected from the cold.

America’s eyes flew open, and he squawked indignantly. “You tricked me!”

Romano laughed at the offended look on his face. “You made it so fucking easy.” He couldn’t believe America had actually fallen for the oldest trick in the book.

Alfred growled at him, and the low noise sent a tingle down Savino’s spine. “That was evil. I really oughta do something about it.”

Savino snorted. “What the fuck do you think you’re gonna do, Mr. Tough Guy?”

“This.” Before Romano could ask what “this” was, America flipped them over, and in the space of a second, he was pinned underneath someone a lot stronger than him. He couldn’t have escaped if he’d wanted to. Savino couldn’t breathe properly, and he couldn’t tell if it was because of the sudden body slam or the fact that Alfred was on top of him.

To repeat, Alfred was on top of him. His brain couldn’t function at half its normal capacity when he realized that.

Then Alfred was kissing him, and it wasn’t soft, nor gentle, nor sweet. America’s tongue shoved its way into his mouth immediately, without any build-up or finesse, and Romano could feel how frustrated he was. He must have been suppressing this desire for as long as Romano had, because it didn’t just feel like something America wanted. It felt like a raw, animalistic hunger, like he was kissing Romano hard enough to bruise because he might die if he didn’t.

Savino felt the same way. He groaned in the back of his throat, clutched the collar of Alfred’s coat, hauled him close enough to feel the edge of his glasses digging into his face, and kissed him back just as forcefully.

After a while, it had to end. They couldn’t kiss forever because of that whole inconvenient “need to breathe” thing. Alfred disconnected their mouths, sighed happily, and scooted down a little to nuzzle Savino’s cheek.

“Best revenge ever,” Alfred declared triumphantly.

Savino huffed out a laugh. “I’m not sure if that counts as revenge. Revenge is supposed to be something the other person doesn’t like.”

“And you liked kissing me a lot, didn’t you?” America sounded so smug and sure of himself, and ordinarily, Romano would have been annoyed by anyone with that kind of attitude. But with Alfred, the fondness tended to outshine his annoyance. That didn’t happen with most people.

Savino rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I did.”

“I liked kissing you too. I’ve been wanting to kiss you for ages. I could kiss you all day long. Well, except for when I have to go to the bathroom or something like that. But other than that, pretty much all the time.”

Savino shook his head and laughed again. “God, I love you.” The words slipped out, because they were so easy to say. Fredo was a dork who would openly admit to wanting to kiss Savino all the time, and he wasn’t even exaggerating. He looked like a goddamned movie star, but even with his occasional moments of arrogance, he never seemed to realize how ludicrously attractive he was, much less how he could have anyone in the world wrapped around his pinkie finger. America made Romano laugh and smile more than anyone else ever had. Of course Savino loved him.

Alfred blinked in shock, he’d just seen the face of God, but somehow more astounded than that. Then he grinned, with the adoration of a child to its mother or a puppy to its owner, but somehow purer and more loving than that too. Savino’s internal similes were failing him.

Alfred’s words were failing him too. “I love you too! I love you so much, I just—” He didn’t finish his sentence and resorted to covering Savino’s face with ecstatic kisses.

Savino giggled at his overexuberance. “Tesoro, I believe you. You don’t have to prove it, okay?”

“But I want to.”

Fair enough, Savino supposed. He laid there, grinning like an idiot in the snowbank, and let Alfred keep kissing his face. His hat had been knocked off earlier when Alfred flipped them over, and the cold at the back of his head and the nape of his neck was starting to get to him, but he was trying to ignore that.

When he noticed Savino shivering, Alfred sat up and pulled him into his lap. “Better?”

“Much.” Romano saw his hat on the ground and frowned in indecision. It had been laying in the snow for a long time, so it would probably only make his head colder, not warmer.

So instead of reaching over to get his hat, he nestled his head into America’s shoulder. America wrapped both arms around him in a clingy embrace.

“Now it’s perfect,” Savino decided.

Alfred kissed the top of his head. “Damn right it is.”

Savino wasn’t quite warm due to the temperature outside, but he was content and drowsy. The rhythm of Alfred’s breathing was oddly soothing.

That rhythm was interrupted by an abrupt laugh. “Dude, I just realized. If someone came by looking for us, they’d find you curled up in my lap instead of running after me and throwing snowballs. They’d be confused as hell.”

“Let ‘em be confused. I don’t really care what they think, do you?”

Alfred squeezed him a little tighter, and Savino didn’t have to look up to know that he was smiling.

“I never did. I’m just happy to be holding you.”

Savino’s face was warm, and he was blushing at least as badly as Alfred had been earlier, after Savino had implied he might do something to him that wasn’t appropriate for a public park. He wasn’t used to this much affection, and maybe he never would be.

But Romano didn’t care who might walk by and see him blushing with a cheesy grin on his face. He was happy, Alfred was holding him, and that was all that fucking mattered.

[hetalia-nordic-trash]

The Heart Gambit (Dennor): 2-The Arbiter

Word Count: 1,566

Summary: Mathias and Emil meet the day after the party for drinks but things take a surprising turn when Emil has to leave suddenly.

Author's Note: Yay next chapter! Sorry it's a little late! I had a great time writing it so I hope you enjoy it and do leave me some feedback so I can keep getting better!

Previous: 1-Where I want to Be

---

Mathias took a swig of his drink. The bar was mostly quiet except for some old men having a conversation in the corner, occasionally punching through the quiet with bouts of hearty laughter. He anticipated the noise would pick up as the night went on and hoped his drink would loosen his nerves.

His plan was to persuade Emil to introduce him to Lukas, but Mathias was having doubts. He'd spent the last night tossing and turn in his hotel room. Should I say I'm sorry for saying he doesn't have a life? Would he believe me? Why do I care what he thinks? Mathias wasn't really sure why he wanted to talk to Lukas so badly.

He thought back to the conversation he had with Alfred last night. All Mathias has to do was shake hands and be relatively polite; win them over with 'charm'. He'd done it a million times before. He remembered how much fun it was at the beginning of his career. He liked seeing people smile and laugh when he was loud or made a snarky comment. No one has seen a Chess player like that before. Breaking the stereotype worked in his favor for a long time, but the more Mathias thought about how he felt about keeping up this facade, the more the same thought came to his mind: I'm tired. This wasn't the first time he had this thought. It started maybe a year ago, and to say it scared him was an understatement. He couldn't fathom losing everything he worked for at the time. He relished the fame and loved his lifestyle. But these days, he had half a mind to be a no-show at the match and run away to a small village nearby and spend the rest of his days breathing in the fresh air, soaking in the sunlight.

Mathias quickly zoned back in as he heard the door open. Emil stepped through, looking much different from the night before. Rather than the suit and tie from last night, he was wearing a striped button-down shirt and brown jacket that looked as if it had been hastily thrown on. Emil looked over at him. He stared for a moment before recognizing Mathias and walking over.

He didn't blame him for not recognizing him. When he's not as some stuffy get-together, Mathais wore his hair much wilder and popped the collars of his shirts. Mathias also wouldn't be surprised if he looked like he went through a tornado considering how tired he was when he got dressed. At this point, it wouldn't phase him to learn he was wearing two left shoes or one black and one brown.

Emil made his way over to Mathias's table and sat across from him. Emil looked a little stiff and his gaze was fixed on the table. He chuckled a bit.

"You know, part of me did think you'd show up," he said with a half-smile.

Mathias beamed.

"Of course! I wanted to finish our conversation from last night! Talking about your brother is way more fun than a stuffy party! To be fair, it's also way more fun when you're not AT the stuffy party!" he laughed. "'Though, I'm kinda curious. What about you, huh?

Emil was taken aback a bit. Just last night, Mathias was mostly well-behaved with a bit of an ego. Now he's asking about him? Everything Lukas told him made it seem like Mathias would be the kind of guy to spend half the time talking about how great he is and the other half talking sponsorship and bulldozing rainforests.

"Well, there's not much to talk about." He shifted a bit in his seat. "It's just been me and Lukas for a long time. When he picked up Chess and started getting serious, I joined him. I never really liked competing, though. So I ended up becoming his second. Now my job is to make sure he actually eats food instead of just reading. The rest is history."

Mathias took a swig from his drink.

"So why stick around, huh? If you don't like the whole competition scene then...well I guess I'm asking what you'd be doing if you weren't doing chess?" he implored with a childlike smile.

Emil scratched at his palm.

"I... well... I've always wanted to go back to school. It's not like I'm that old or anything! I used to wanted to go to school for geology or something like that," Emil said, his face lighting up. "I've always like volcanoes and things like that!"

Mathias gave a bit smile.

"That's so cool! You should tell me what lava feels like when you get to touch it!" he exclaimed.

Emil raised an eyebrow.

"I don't think... never mind. So what about you, huh? Got any plans for after the match?" Emil asked, stealing glances at his watch.

Mathias paused for a moment. He couldn't exactly say he hadn't thought about it before. Of course he has. But no matter how much he thought about it, he couldn't think of somewhere he wanted to be. He couldn't see himself as any conventional job like a lawyer, teacher, and certainly not an office worker. If he was honest with himself, he didn't really fit any job in particular. He didn't have a higher purpose anymore. Chess became his life, his life became chess, and he was scared of who he would be without it. He lost so much to Chess, but he most regretted the time he lost, the life he wouldn't get back. Maybe that's what he would do. Spend the rest of his life making up for all the time he lost at uncomfortable parties, being purposely arrogant and hurtful, and for every game he played after he realized it didn't make him happy anymore.

Mathias managed a small smile.

"Oh you know!" he said, trying to sound cheery. "I think I wanna take a break for a while! No more stuffy lame parties for a long time! I'll get a house somewhere nice and just have a good time!"

Emil opened his mouth to respond, but his watch began beeping. He jumped up from his seat and stopped his watch.

"Sorry! I have to...um...go...I'll be right back!" he said, practically bolting out.

Mathias barely had time to process what happened before the door opened and a familiar figure walked through. Emil was right, he did come right back. Only something was different. Mathias got a second look and felt himself stiffen up.

"No way," he whispered under his breath.

Lukas was scanning the room with furrowed brows. He carefully made his way through the now more crowded bar, looking at every patron as if he lost something. Mathias found him jumping up from his seat and weaving his way through the tables and chairs towards Lukas. In all honesty, he had no idea what he was doing or what he was going to say to him once he got there. He just knew he had to meet Lukas.

Ok, I'll open with an apology! Yeah! 'Sorry for being an ass during the interview!'. Then maybe I can ask him to get a drink or something or-

Mathias felt something bump against his chest that caused him to take a step back. He snapped back to reality and noticed someone sprawled on the floor in front of him.

"Woah are you ok!? My bad! I totally didn't see you there!" he cried out, a bit too loudly.

Mathias stuck out his hand. The person on the floor sat up a bit, rubbing their arm.

"Sorry...I'm just looking for my brother..." the person replied quietly.

They reached out and grabbed Mathias's hand, finally making eye contact. And at that moment, Mathias knew it was all over. Lukas's hand was so soft and warm in his own, he couldn't imagine ever letting go of it. The feeling of his hands sent electricity through his veins. Falling to the ground made his hair a little messy, strands of blonde hair covering his face, and he was partially tangled up in a long white scarf. But what made Mathias know he was done for was Lukas's eyes. Like Emil, they were so blue they seemed violet, but Lukas's were different. They always seemed so cold in the pictures Mathias has seen of him. Those weren't the eyes he met. Mathias saw soft eyes, like a child's. There was concern in them, maybe even a little embarrassment. Lukas's eyes managed to see right through Mathias straight into his soul. He felt his heart flutter for a moment and a warmth spread to his cheeks. And with that, his whole world turned upside down.

Lukas had already begun pulling himself up when he finally recognized the man attached to the hand.

"Thank y- WAIT A MINUTE YOU'RE-"

Lukas's grip on Mathias's hand slipped and he found he found himself crashing back onto the floor with another loud thud. All Mathias could manage to do was stare for a moment before forcing himself to offer his hand again, praying Lukas would take it.

"Hi...I'm...um...I'm Mathias...nice to meet you..." was the only thing he could get to come out, feeling the least confident he'd ever felt in his life.

Lukas hesitated for a moment before taking Mathias's hand.

--- Next Chapter: 3-Coming Soon!

a/n: I'm so excited to be writing this! Things are definitely gonna start getting more interesting in the next chapter!  I’m going to take this time to plug my non-hetalia work “ Intro to Love ” about a college student who struggles to keep her superpowers a secret and while making new friends.  How much of her normal life will she give up to save her friends from a mysterious villain that drains students’ brains and turns them into zombies? The complete Chapter 1 is out NOW! And Chapter 2.1-'The last of the Good Days' will be out in the next couple of days!

Thanks again for reading! Send some feedback my way! Can’t wait to continue this story!

Quotev link: here

[medea10]

My Review of Trigun

How did I get into this anime? Let’s just say this was one of those animes that used to air on Saturday nights back in the day that I would every now and then come across while waiting for either Full Metal Alchemist, InuYasha, or Cowboy Bebop to air. But I never did watch a full episode or know a damn thing about this anime. So I’m just jumping into this anime blindfolded. All I know is that this was Johnny Yong Bosch’s first anime role.

Who is Vash the Stampede?

A frequent question that comes up throughout the series! Rumor has it that he wears a long, red trench coat and sports a Mohawk hairstyle. Some say he’s a notorious lecher. Many recount him shooting up their villages to a pile of rubble just for the heck of it. He has quite the reputation as he has a $$60,000,000,000 bounty on his head and is often known as the “Humanoid Typhoon”.

In reality, Vash the Stampede is…a bit of a dingus. He just happens to be at the wrong place at the wrong time and things kinda get out of hand. But that doesn’t stop two insurance agents (Milly Thompson and Meryl Stryfe) from following him around to confirm Vash’s identity and keep his actions to a minimum. At first, it’s hard to tell if he’s a stupid-genius or just flighty and gets lucky one too many times. But when shit goes down, don’t be surprised when you see this doofus get serious.

BETWEEN THE SUB AND THE DUB: Okay, what sad company did this use to belong to, Geneon, Bandai, or ADV Films? Oh, Geneon! That means good voice actors from L.A. put in really shitty roles. On the contrary, this was a fairly decent English dub. And on a severely positive note, this was indeed Johnny Yong Bosch’s very first anime role (and a main role at that). This was like fresh off his time as a Power Ranger! And I gotta give props for giving this guy a chance at voice acting. This role was the launching point to what has been a very successful career for Bosch. As for the sub, let’s just say I’m happy any time I get to hear Hiromi Tsuru in something besides Dragon Ball. Here’s what you might recognize these folks from.

JAPANESE CAST: *Vash is played by Masaya Onosaka (known for Bill on Pokemon, Isaac on Baccano, Jadeite on Sailor Moon, Kero on Cardcaptor Sakura, Leeron on Gurren Lagann, France on Hetalia, and Spandam on One Piece)

*Meryl is played by Hiromi Tsuru (known for Bulma on DBZ, Ukyo on Ranma ½, Yubel on YGO GX, and Mika on Gravitation) [R.I.P.]

*Milly is played by Satsuki Yukino (known for Kagome on InuYasha, Mion/Shion on Higurashi, Tae on Gintama, Amakata on Free!, Hiiragi on Natsume Yuujinchou, Mutsumi on Love Hina, and Yoruichi on Bleach)

ENGLISH CAST: *Vash is played by Johnny Yong Bosch (known for Ichigo on Bleach, Lelouch on Code Geass, Makoto on Free!, Izaya on Durarara, Artemis on Sailor Moon redub, Koizumi on Haruhi Suzumiya, and Yukio on Blue Exorcist)

*Meryl is played by Dorothy Elias-Fahn (known for Kaoru on Rurouni Kenshin, Naru on Love Hina, Tomoe on Rozen Maiden, Hakuei on Magi, Houki on Fushigi Yugi, and Amane on Tenchi Muyo GXP)

*Milly is played by Lia Sargent (known for Dorothy on The Big O and Judy on Cowboy Bebop)

FAVORITE CHARACTER: Milly! I don’t need a reason, it’s Milly!

SHIPPING: I didn’t really start thinking about shipping until more than halfway into this series. I thought there might be something between Vash and Meryl, but then again maybe not! Then I saw the backstory of Vash’s “younger days” and falling for the one woman who showed him compassion.

Yes, this is the same woman we consistently see in Vash’s flashbacks, Rem. Ooh boy, it’s one of those stories! So yeah, never mind my thinking with Vash x Meryl ever happening. I feel like Vash will mourn Rem’s death for a long time that I don’t think the whole thing with Meryl will ever work.

And as for Wolfwood x Milly…

FUUUUUUUCK! WHY DID YOU RUIN THIS CUTE COUPLE?!

MILLY WAS HEART-BROKEN!

…At least she got to have one night of passion with Wolfy-boy before the unthinkable happened.

THAT DARN CAT: If you watched this series, you might have noticed a little black cat spotted in nearly every episode. It’s there in the opening theme. It’s there in random places throughout the series. It’s there in the ending theme. What’s up with this cat? Well, there are a lot of theories surrounding this particular cat (or Kuroneko). Some say it’s really Rem inside that cat since you see it in literally every episode around Vash. Others say it’s because the creator of Trigun wanted to just mess with your minds with the kitty walking around in random places and towns. Seriously, it will always appear in every new town Vash and the gang comes across! As an avid cat enthusiast, I’m fine with whatever the result. Just as long as no harm comes to the little Kuroneko.

HALFWAY POINT: Halfway into the series we notice something more when it comes to Mr. Vash the Stampede. First of all, those horrifying scars all over his body! Second, that mysterious girl he often thinks about. I mean, we see flashes of her in the opening sequence. And third, the reason why he never kills. Vash has the ability of causing so much damage when pushed to a breaking point. One of the many reasons why he’s known as the “humanoid typhoon”! And that was perfectly shown when Vash chases the residents out of a town (so there would be no casualties), totally demolished the town during a fight, and made an indent on the moon!

But the story takes a sharp-left turn into WTF territory when we learn about WHAT exactly Vash is. Vash is a plant. Vash also has a brother named Knives. And while Vash has a mentality that all beings have a right to live, Knives has a “kill them all and let God sort them out” point of view. Now the existence of Vash and Knives came with a lot of controversy, especially in the ship that they were on. But that girl who Vash cares for, Rem cared for them regardless of what they were. Rem had high hopes for a peaceful world with coexistence. Too bad Knives had other motives and killed her.

ENDING TO TV SERIES: Vash has tried so hard to keep Milly, Meryl, and Wolfwood out of harm’s way. He knows there are some pretty bad people after him, including his polar-opposite brother, Knives. Vash hates death and wants to save as many people as humanly possible. He doesn’t want to see any more needless death. Probably from his flashbacks and losing Rem! Unfortunately, this doesn’t go so well.

I can see how iconic this death was now after witnessing it. Wolfwood, the priest who would hook up with Vash every now and then when they’re up against some ruffians, now finds himself in a crucial decision. He gets orders that he must eliminate Vash. And Wolfwood ends up dying instead in a very dramatic death scene. God-damn! And just that scene where Milly is sobbing freakin’ eats you up inside.

At least she had one night of passion before the unfortunate happened!

Vash hates the thought of having to kill anyone. But he might not have a choice if Knives is coming after him and even hires a powerful foe from a previous episode and the guy that killed Wolfwood to take you out. Once Vash met up with Knives, he winds up having some pretty sick flashbacks of Knives. But our homeboy was able to take out Knives, the desert area gets water, and…

I’m gonna have to read the fucking manga for more, right?

Tap dancing fuck!

BADLANDS RUMBLE: 12 years after the series ended, Japan decides to release a side-story in the form of a movie, bringing back our favorite characters like Vash, Wolfwood, Milly, and Meryl. And yes, reuniting the cast…in Japan.

By 2010, Geneon was as good as dead and FUNimation licensed Trigun. In short, they managed to get Johnny Young Bosch to reprise his role as Vash the Stampede. But everyone else was replaced. And surprisingly, the people they got to do Wolfwood and Milly were pretty freakin’ close to their original voices. Meryl’s voice, come on I know Luci Christian any-damn-where! Vash helps a young lady take out a big-bad guy (who turns out to be his father). And it has the feel of the original series where it’s set in a western town with lots of booze and shoot-em-ups! It’s an interesting side-story to the Trigun trilogy.

Trigun was a pretty good anime. I mean, not one of my favorites, but I can definitely see a lot of people sticking by this classic. Maybe you can chalk up my blah attitude to the fact that I’m not fond of westerns and I kinda took it out on Trigun. Or the fact that there was so much more that the anime could have covered before the end and the ending kinda felt off to me! Like I thought I was expecting more. But I suppose that’s what mangas are for. To be honest, the stories that really grabbed my attention were the back-stories with Vash and Knives and Wolfwood’s final episode.

*sniffles* At least Milly got one night of passion before he died!

If you would like to check out Trigun, all the episodes are available through FUNimation and Hulu (in both Japanese and English). And if you really like the anime, why not purchase the hard copies? Both the series and movie are available for home video.

Okay, that took me a while, but I’m glad to finish Trigun. What’s next on the FUNimation list?

EEHHHHHEEEHHHE

Fuck is that supposed to mean? What is that? Is that even in English?

YOU WILL BE HORRIBLY MUTILATED: The Isekai

Do you mean Re:Zero? That’s great…but that review’s not ready yet. And it probably won’t be until after April 2021! So let’s cast caution to the wind and pick another FUNimation licensed anime.

You’re watching Sarazanmai next. It’s best if you don’t ask questions.

Sarazanmai? The fuck does that even mean?!

OH. MY. GOD.

[asitrita]

Personal rant

This is a personal rant about Spain’s history and some people’s interpertation of it, mostly regarding some of the “nations”, or “ethnic groups” that are sometimes considered Spain’s parents. If you think it can affect you personally, don’t continue reading.

I really do not understand people who consider Spain’s father figure anyone other than Rome. Like... literally, no one makes any sense other than Rome. I could buy Visigoth acting as Spain’s father figure, or as his “tutor”, and I could even understand (though in no way share) the idea of Castile and Aragon being Spain’s “parents”. Though, again, I would not share that hc either, because even if the current nation-estate of Spain is “younger” than the many different medieval kingdoms, the notion, the “idea”, the “identity” to some extent, of Spain is way older than any of those medieval kingdoms which, technically, were not nations nor modern estates either, so acting as if Spain came to be out of the blue in the 15th century, as if there had not been already a clear Spanish identity and notion of unity and nation prior the 15th/16th centuries is just... ignoring all the evidence. What I trully do not understand is when people have Al-Ándalus, Umayyad, or even Carthage, as Spain’s father figures. It is true that history can be interpreted in many different ways, more so when it comes to Hetalia, but there are some interpretations that... they just make no sense. Not from a historical point of view, at least. Guess you can have whatever headcanons you want, but historically speaking, they may make no sense whatsoever. And that is exactly the case with these interpretations. For Al-Ándalus and Umayyad the reason why it is utter nonsense for any of them to be Spain’s father figure is that they are literally everything Spain is not (and did not want to be). In the first years of our lives, until we become adults, we all build our identity against the others. Something similar happens with the different nations. They build their identity partially based on not being like the neighbour next door. We could say that Spain built itself against precisely these two guys up there, Al-Ándalus and Umayyad. One could think, “okay, but as we all know, in many cases, the first ones we try to build our identity against is our parents, so that could further emphasise the role of those two as Spain’s paternal figures”. Well, no, and here’s why. Maybe it all comes to what I understand as a father figure, but to me, in the case of nations, the father figure, or the “father” or “mother” of a nation should be the one the nation receives more influences from. It should be to some extent the “origin” of most, or a big significant part of the nation’s culture, identity, and overall, idiosyncrasy. Either that, or it should have left a very deep impact and long lasting effect in the character and identity of that nation. And what I mean is that the nation must have adopted transcedental aspects from that “father nation” that are now rooted deep in its character. Otherwise, a deep impact could be a traumatic event like a war that people from the nation have built their national pride upon, but that’s not what I mean. I mean that the nation has actively acquired, integrated, and assimilated, deep and transcendental elements and aspects of its “father nation” culture and identity, so the “father nation” identity has, to some extent, become the identity of the “new nation”. Examples of some of these transcedental elements could be religion (and overall, spirituality), sense of justice, moral values, or even lexicon related to abstract concepts and emotions such as love, passion, fear, desire, hate, regret, etc. So here’s the thing. Neither Al-Ándalus nor Umayyad did, in any way, affect Spain in this respect. Mind, I am not saying they didn’t leave any influence in Spain at all, what I am saying is that they did not have a transcedental influence in Spain’s identity. Or they did, but just in the opposite way. Spain takes its culture, society, values, and spirituality from Rome, and builds itself against Al-Ándalus and Umayyad (quite honestly, Spain’s relationship with these two is more similar to the “traumatic” event some nations have built their national pride upon I mentioned earlier than to any father-son type of relationship). If anything, they only helped to exacerbate Spain’s loyalty to its “indigenous hispanoroman” identity. Again, not saying they left no influence, for example, some architecture in southern Spain (though, tbh, it’s more like a couple buildings people visit while ignoring the hundreds of christians and roman buildings lol), some cities, some influences in the food and some traditional dishes, some new agricultural and destillation techniques, etc. And it is well known that up to 8% of the Spanish vocabulary is of Arab origin, even though, to be honest, much of that percentage are toponyms and half of the lexicon is no longer used in Spanish today (most people don’t even know half of these words, and some have their Latin counterpart). However, none of these influences affects Spain’s psique and identity to a transcendental level. Not only that, but the people who identified as Spaniards and all its old variants (derivatives of Latin’s hispanus/hispanicus) were the Northern Christian people, never the Muslims who lived in Al-Ándalus under Umayyad rule. It was northern Christians who talked about Spain, who considered Spain their “lost” nation, and who identified with a Spanish identity, not the people nor the rulers of Al-Ándalus (for a short time, Northern Christians would actually refer to Christians living under Muslim rule in Al-Andalus as Spaniards, to distinguish them from the Muslims). And in no way am I justifying the following, I’m just stating a fact, which is that Muslims were expelled. All of them. Which means that Spain, as a nation, as the people it represents, literally has almost no link whatsoever with the people of Al-Ándalus, Arabs, nor Muslims, other than its people, the “Spanish people” fought them for centuries. Obviously, they lived in the same piece of land, though borders were never an easy place to live in, they were not 24/7 killing each other (impossible to do that nonstop for almost 8 century), they often traded, and there were Christians living in Muslim territories who adopted some Arab or generally Middle Eastern/Oriental traditions and practices that they preserved even under Christian rule (they were called Moriscos), hence the influences. But these influences are so superficial and “materialistic”, they affected so little the Spanish way of understanding the world, that I trully think it is unrealistic to make any of these two Spain’s father figure. It is almost a bad joke when you get the Northern Kingdoms singing to Spain and identifying as Spanish, getting ripped of their representation and identity, and instead, associating this identity and representation (their identity and representation) to those who never identified as Spanish and fought those who did with the intention of conquering and subduing them. And I guess you could argue that most of “Spain” (the land) was under Muslim (Umayyad) control, but as I understand Hetalia, and modern states today, it is not about land, but about nations and ethnic groups, and the people they represent, and it just makes no sense to make Spain’s father figure neither Al-Ándalus nor Umayyad, because given history, they would have probably tried to kill Spain had they got the chance, and the same goes for Spain, as it certainly would try to kill them as well. Plus, friendly reminder that the muslim territory of Spain was, for the most part, independent from the Umayyad Empire, so even if members of the Umayyad dinasty ruled over Al-Ándalus, it was not part of its empire (again, for the most part, there was a short time it did belonged to the empire). Plus  Al-Ándalus was cut into pieces during the 11th century and the Arab “Umayyad” elite expelled from the Peninsula. I mean, neither the Umayyad dinasty nor Al-Ándalus lasted for 7 centuries. The Arab rulling elite (Umayyad) were expelled, and Al-Ándalus destroyed, by the end of the 11th century. So it is not true Spain received direct influence from these particular people for almost 800 years, that’s an extreme oversimplification of Medieval Spain, as Arab rule in part of Spain, as well as the existance of Al-Ándals, in reality, lasted for around 350 years, as opposed to Roman presence in Spain, which lasted for over 600 years, plus, they were never expelled and their identity completely permeated the indegenous inhabitants of the Iberian Peninsula.

About Carthage... what can I say? This just makes no sense. It may not be as ironic (and almost offensive) as the other two choices, but in some way, it makes even less sense, if that’s even possible. Not much to say about this one, I just can’t even think of one thing Spain has inherited from this guy, can’t think of any influence from Carthaginean culture or whatever in Spain. The little I can think of slightly related to Carthage is actually Phoenitian so... I mean, Cartagena, in Murcia, is a great city, but... can anyone think of any significant influence, any significant link Spain as a nation, or Spaniards as an ethnic group, have with Carthage? I’m sure people from Murcia may come up with something but... in general, I really don’t think we have anything to do with Carthagineans, as much as I like Carthage. I’m sorry, but I trully can’t think of anything Spaniards, Hispanics, even Portuguese if you want (though I’m no expert on Portuguese history so I may be wrong on this one) have “inherited” from Carthage (guess you could link the Portuguese Empire based on trade with Carthage, but realistically speaking, there’s no historical corelation there either). I guess they may have introduced some new techniques and whatnot, but, really, that happens all the time, that does not affect the identity of a group nor their way of looking at the world greatly, unless it supposes a radical change in their way of life, which did not happen, since Carthage barelly controled some strategic cities. Yes, it got to the northern part of Spain, but did not have actual control over all that territory, and there was no cohesive rule nor anything I can think of... In any case, I’m no expert on Carthage either, but I trully cannot think of any Carthaginean influence in Spain at all. In conclusion, a nation’s “father figure” is the one that has, to some extent, “built the nation”, or “mould it”. Just like if we were talking about a human being, we should ask “how does it behave? how does it think? how does it see the world? how does it communicate? what are its values? what are its traditions?” Then ask about the origin of all those answers. And there you get the “father figure”. Spaniards speak a Latin-based language/s (but the Basques and some people from Navarra who speak a pre-Roman language), they are Christians, Roman Cahotlics to be more precise, and Spanish justice is based on Visigothic and Roman laws. Spanish culture is overwhelmingly based on Roman culture, as is its society, values, etc. The way Spanish interact with the world and others is based on a Roman perception of the world. They may be others who have influenced Spain, I’m not denying that, but none of them has, not by a long shot, defined Spanish identity as much as Rome has. The only event in history that had a significant importance in defining Spain’s identity other than Rome and getting to America, is the war against the Muslims, which includes the two listed above. But they never “added” to the Spanish identity on significant levels, for the most part they just reinforced it by acting as its antagonists, which is not exactly what I would represent as “parenthood”. Carthage... I don’t even know how that happened. And that’s it. This is not a personal attack to anyone who has any of these headcanons, it may seem like it is, but it is not. If anything, it is an “attack” to these ideas, simply because I don’t think they accurately portray Spain’s history at all, on the contrary, they distort Spanish history based on 18th and 19th century foreigner’s ignorant and orientalist crazy theories and assumption (and anti-Catholic propaganda, tbh), and Hetalia, at the end of the day, is about history. If any one has these headcanons,you do you, go with it, but please be aware that they are not historically accurate, that’s it.

[thefreakishmuffin]

Hetalia is coming back, and I have some thoughts...

Alrighty everyone, here we go! As if 2020 couldn’t get more insane...

(This is a longer post, so I’ll add fun gifs to separate the walls of text so it isn’t so exhausting to read).

So, if you’ve been on the internet since the early 2010′s, you’ve most likely seen, or at least heard, of an odd show called Hetalia. This anime, with the manga originally created by Hidekaz Himaruya, was later adapted into an anime. For those who are either new to the internet or have been living under a rock for the last decade, Hetalia, first going under the name Hetalia: Axis Powers, is a show about different events in world history and world politics, all being portrayed by people who represent different countries. Each country - or character, you could say - is essentially the embodiment of all their respective country’s stereotypes. 

For example, Germany is extremely strict, loud, militaristic, and often angry or stubborn. Italy is an absolute coward who is obsessed with pasta and beautiful women. And America is an over-the-top, loud, bombastic, arrogant dork who is constantly downing fast food and calling himself a “hero.” The list goes on and on, but you get the idea. 

Hetalia was, and still is, an extremely weird show. And with season seven on the horizon, coming to us in Spring 2021, I feel like I ought to talk about it. And why am I taking the time to talk about it?

Because I am a veteran Hetalian. 

(Me laughing but slowly dying inside)

You read that right. Throughout all of middle school and the first few months of high school (almost four years), I was an absolute obsessive Hetalia fangirl. Outside of the internet, I was the biggest fan I knew, along with the guy who was my best friend at the time. We’d binge watch the show, read and write fanfiction, bring others into the cult fandom, talk about it almost constantly, draw fanart, watch the funny mmd video compilations on YouTube, delve really deep into world history, quote and reenact all of our favorite scenes - we even cosplayed England and Prussia one year for Halloween! This was the show that made me the HUGE history nerd I am today! I even got a book on the complete history of Prussia one year for Christmas.

Yep. We were those kind of fans. (Not gonna lie, as a now twenty-year-old woman, I still kinda cringe looking back at my middle school years. But I was having fun, so who cares?)

So when I heard we were getting another season after a five year hiatus, you’d think I’d be super stoked that a show I was once madly in love with was coming back from the dead, right? 

(The part of me that is thrilled about Hetalia returning)

Well... It’s a little complicated. I won’t lie that I am really excited for this new season, and I’m of course gonna watch the entire series over again in preparation for it. But I have some hopes, worries, and mixed emotions about everything happening, and everything that may or may not go down when the season eventually airs, including the time leading up to it. I even have a particular topic I want to get to, but you’ll see that later in the post.

To address my worries, we first have to go way back to the early days of the fandom. For the most part, the Hetalia fandom was just really weird, fun, nerdy, and quirky. Nothing wrong with that. I feel like the fandom already had an odd reputation, but at least it wasn’t a bad one. That is until we had some... How should I say... Toxic behaviors and incidents start to take place. 

Allow me to explain. How I see it, every fandom has some kind of toxicity level. The toxicity level is from the fans who are, well, toxic. We all know who they are, and you’ve likely met at least a few here and there. And the toxicity levels vary from fandom to fandom. In some it’s very low, and in others it’s very high. I wouldn’t say the Hetalia fandom’s toxicity level was super high, but it wasn’t incredibly low either. We had the usual problems, like some intense shipping wars and people debating on different ideas and headcanons, but the Hetalia fandom had something a bit different going on.

(My two personalities trying to coexist in peace)

You see, a lot of people didn’t like - or even hated - Hetalia, because they saw it as racist and offensive. If you admitted you liked Hetalia outside of the fandom, you ran a definite risk of getting either shunned or degraded for it. And if that wasn’t bad enough, you had a group of fans - a rather small group of fans, mind you - who did some pretty insensitive things that ended up landing the fandom in some serious hot water.

You’d have people in that small group of fans who’d openly do the Nazi salute while cosplaying Germany at conventions, and there was even the incident where you had fans cosplaying as Nazi Germany to the holocaust museum, where they decided to pose doing the Nazi salute. I even saw a cosplay of Germany and Prussia pointing guns at the Star of David, which is a well known symbol of the Jewish faith. Not to mention the fans who seemed to fetishize Nazi Germany and Prussia. Now, I may not know about everything these people did, as I was pretty good at staying on the light side of the fandom, but these were some pretty well known and disgraceful problems that everyone would find out about sooner or later.

Sadly enough, it was that small, tiny percentile of the fandom that did things that were so offensive, so wrong, that it was greatly magnified by others, thus giving the fandom its toxic, even cringey reputation. And I really hope we don’t have to relive that all over again.

(Me singing songs about punching Nazis and eating pasta)

So what I hope is that we are able to leave all of that behind us. Though I’ve already seen some Twitter users try to start drama all over again by reposting the offensive cosplays, and Tumblr users getting their panties in a wad because they apparently have nothing else better to do. But because a vast majority of the Hetalia fans are like me in that we’ve grown older and matured, I’m hoping we can help guide the younger, newer fans in the right direction.

And I won’t deny that I am very worried about the newer fans getting harassed and bullied on social media. I don’t have a lot of advice when it comes to the haters, other than the usual ‘ignore them and don’t respond’, tactic. But just know that if they don’t leave you alone, you can always block them.

And here’s another bit I want to touch upon. While I can completely understand why people see this show as racist and offensive, I honestly don’t think it is. If anything, I think it actually teaches us something. And no, I’m not talking about history right here. I’m talking about the stereotypes, and how they are portrayed. I think this show helps us to understand that all of these different stereotypes we have about different people and countries are all stupid and silly.

Do we actually know a German who is exactly like Hetalia’s Germany? No. Do any of us know an Englishman who is identical to Hetalia’s England in every way? Of course not. This series helps us to understand that the stereotypes so many of us hold onto today are nothing more than just stupid, silly old ideas that have been blown far out of proportion over the years. 

Many people try to claim that this show is overtly racist and tries to divide, but in my opinion, I think it ties us together.

(My last two braincells writing up this post at around midnight)

At the end of the day, I’m incredibly excited and eager to see the new season of Hetalia, and everything that it will have in store for us. And it’s fun too look back on all the nostalgic memories I have of this show. This is all I have to say for now, but I may or may not be coming back to this topic in the future. Might even make another blog for Hetalia while I’m coming back to the fandom. After all, this is known as the fandom you can’t escape from.

Now if you excuse me, I’m gonna go press play on Hetalia: Axis Powers episode one, and let myself spiral into insanity once again!

[pastaaa-bird]

ahhhhhhhh l had a Hetalia superhero AU that l haven't thought of for ages so uh rant about it

SO hetalia characters but they are Superherossssss l didn't really develop the plot too much and just had animatics of songs in my head planned out

The basic idea of this AU is that it's a world where superhero exists all over the globe, half the story falls into classic superhero tropes and the other is my interpution of how superheros would be like if they were real

The plot is grossly underdeveloped, basically there is some global threat to many countries so the strongest heros from each country are joined together to defeat this threat to their citizens

NOWWWW the charactersssss

l'll start with the Vargas

Feliciano and Lovinooooo

The two are twins who developed their powers from their father who had gotten it from his father(their grandfather)

Roma is a retired hero who had multiple powers and claims that he won the powers against a God in a some sort of bet game, he refuse to explain who it was or how

Many people have doubts in him but the man refuses to say that it could be from anything else

Roma's powers are that he is significantly more advanced then the average human being. Super strength, unhumanly fast, able to leap up a great height, quick self healing and skilled reflexes

Although these powers are all amazing they do have major backlash for him becauee it is extremely tiring to use all this power and leaves him a well known wanted gone target. Due to all of that he was forced to retire early. His children grandchildren each inhereted one of his powers

Seborga(l don't have a human name for him), his grandson, inhereted his leaping abilties but didn't take up the "Superhero" life-Seborga's twin cousins on the othet hand did. Although he has helped out before but 90% of the time stays out of it for safety reasons and simply not wanting that life

Feliciano's power is that he is able to move FAR faster then the average human, l wouldn't say fast enough to not be been but fast enough to be seen as blurry

Downside is that he can tire himself but not as much as an average person moving as fast as he does, more like feeling like you just walked a while and feeling slightly tired or if he tried he fastest to run then it would feel like running a marathon unprepared

His power is mostly used for running away rather then running into action but since he is much faster then normal people he can easily avoid up close attacks by dogying them. He could use his power for attacks but he'd rather sticking to defense. Feliciano hates when he has to be in a direct fight and even though he is great at get aways he still mentally freaks out everytime butttt he really does love the rush of it

Lovino's power is enhanced self healing, more or less he can quickly heal from injuries quite quickly. Downside is that it can be tiring to heal himself quickly if he hasn't eaten beforehand or in general if the injury is severe. He can still feel pain but the fast self healing either stops the pain or leaves it with a slight ache pain you get when a fairly bad imjury has just about healed

Lovino has issues with his power not being a combat one in anyway. He can't help but view his power as a let down since yes it is an advantage to heal fast but he would much rather a power that could help him improve his fighting. Because(yes l'm starting with because)of this he really pushes him self to improving fighting naturally althought it is very difficult and challenging for him, he took up boxing classes amd created his own work out schedule. He really wants to probe himself, especially to his grandfather

The two are a pair, like l said before they are taught by their grandfather. Roma organises prerty much everything for them, gives them the plan and strategies

The song l imagined them to is "LA Devotee"

l imagine it opening at a sunny rich holiday spot area showing off that and then showing glimses of 2 guys in particular(Lovino with sunglasses in a white sports car and Roma listening to some mircophone speaker thing in his ear sitting at a table with an umbrella along with tourists) and shady looking men

Then at the first "black magic" line, Feliciano bursts through a crowd of the tourists with the sketchy guys watching two of their men chase after Feliciano so they follow too

The verse is him being chased and dogging the attempts to grab him, really just him going through his restort place

at the line "the sun sets" l imagine Feliciano running on some uhhhhh pond? Those man made long lake things idk what to call them, and like if this was a movie the camera following up so the sun shines down bright making him look all shiny and cool then it goes down again

Feliciano manges to loose all but one of the men(some fell in the water, ran into things etc because of Feli's quick movements and changes in direction)

When it says ",You got bleached out eyes from the valley sand" l imagine that it's Lovino geting out of the car and sneaky around looking and waiting and then at the second "black magic line" it's Feliciano quickly handing him some tiny sliver box( size of an orange) which he puts in the car and Felicinao puts on some jacket with a hood, sunglass, puts the hood of the car up and drives away

Lovino pyhsically fights the last remaing guy. The guy keeps hurting him but Lovino recovers as if nothing happens which confuses and frustrates the man. Eventually Lovino knocks out the man and looks surprised with himself then speaks something into his own ear piece(like Roma's), it flashes to Roma nodding and leaving his place at his table

at the very last "the black magic" line l imagine it showing Feliciano on a completely blank road with no cars around and flashes to what he had done beforr bursting through that crowd. It shows him taking tricking guards, tying them up and then taking the sliver box

anddddddddd l'm tired of typing so uh l might finish this off later since l had stuff for Gil, Ludwig, Alfred, Matthew, Arthur and Erzsébet already planned out

yeah uh sorry this is cringy

l'm too tired to proof read thi

[thechosenburrito]

The Heart Gambit (Dennor): 2-The Arbiter

Word Count: 1,566

Summary: Mathias and Emil meet the day after the party for drinks but things take a surprising turn when Emil has to leave suddenly. Author's Note: Yay next chapter! Sorry it's a little late! I had a great time writing it so I hope you enjoy it and do leave me some feedback so I can keep getting better! Previous: 1-Where I want to Be --- Mathias took a swig of his drink. The bar was mostly quiet except for some old men having a conversation in the corner, occasionally punching through the quiet with bouts of hearty laughter. He anticipated the noise would pick up as the night went on and hoped his drink would loosen his nerves. His plan was to persuade Emil to introduce him to Lukas, but Mathias was having doubts. He'd spent the last night tossing and turn in his hotel room. Should I say I'm sorry for saying he doesn't have a life? Would he believe me? Why do I care what he thinks? Mathias wasn't really sure why he wanted to talk to Lukas so badly.

He thought back to the conversation he had with Alfred last night. All Mathias has to do was shake hands and be relatively polite; win them over with 'charm'. He'd done it a million times before. He remembered how much fun it was at the beginning of his career. He liked seeing people smile and laugh when he was loud or made a snarky comment. No one has seen a Chess player like that before. Breaking the stereotype worked in his favor for a long time, but the more Mathias thought about how he felt about keeping up this facade, the more the same thought came to his mind: I'm tired. This wasn't the first time he had this thought. It started maybe a year ago, and to say it scared him was an understatement. He couldn't fathom losing everything he worked for at the time. He relished the fame and loved his lifestyle. But these days, he had half a mind to be a no-show at the match and run away to a small village nearby and spend the rest of his days breathing in the fresh air, soaking in the sunlight. Mathias quickly zoned back in as he heard the door open. Emil stepped through, looking much different from the night before. Rather than the suit and tie from last night, he was wearing a striped button-down shirt and brown jacket that looked as if it had been hastily thrown on. Emil looked over at him. He stared for a moment before recognizing Mathias and walking over. He didn't blame him for not recognizing him. When he's not as some stuffy get-together, Mathais wore his hair much wilder and popped the collars of his shirts. Mathias also wouldn't be surprised if he looked like he went through a tornado considering how tired he was when he got dressed. At this point, it wouldn't phase him to learn he was wearing two left shoes or one black and one brown. Emil made his way over to Mathias's table and sat across from him. Emil looked a little stiff and his gaze was fixed on the table. He chuckled a bit. "You know, part of me did think you'd show up," he said with a half-smile. Mathias beamed. "Of course! I wanted to finish our conversation from last night! Talking about your brother is way more fun than a stuffy party! To be fair, it's also way more fun when you're not AT the stuffy party!" he laughed. "'Though, I'm kinda curious. What about you, huh? Emil was taken aback a bit. Just last night, Mathias was mostly well-behaved with a bit of an ego. Now he's asking about him? Everything Lukas told him made it seem like Mathias would be the kind of guy to spend half the time talking about how great he is and the other half talking sponsorship and bulldozing rainforests. "Well, there's not much to talk about." He shifted a bit in his seat. "It's just been me and Lukas for a long time. When he picked up Chess and started getting serious, I joined him. I never really liked competing, though. So I ended up becoming his second. Now my job is to make sure he actually eats food instead of just reading. The rest is history." Mathias took a swig from his drink. "So why stick around, huh? If you don't like the whole competition scene then...well I guess I'm asking what you'd be doing if you weren't doing chess?" he implored with a childlike smile. Emil scratched at his palm. "I... well... I've always wanted to go back to school. It's not like I'm that old or anything! I used to wanted to go to school for geology or something like that," Emil said, his face lighting up. "I've always like volcanoes and things like that!" Mathias gave a bit smile. "That's so cool! You should tell me what lava feels like when you get to touch it!" he exclaimed. Emil raised an eyebrow. "I don't think... never mind. So what about you, huh? Got any plans for after the match?" Emil asked, stealing glances at his watch. Mathias paused for a moment. He couldn't exactly say he hadn't thought about it before. Of course he has. But no matter how much he thought about it, he couldn't think of somewhere he wanted to be. He couldn't see himself as any conventional job like a lawyer, teacher, and certainly not an office

worker. If he was honest with himself, he didn't really fit any job in particular. He didn't have a higher purpose anymore. Chess became his life, his life became chess, and he was scared of who he would be without it. He lost so much to Chess, but he most regretted the time he lost, the life he wouldn't get back. Maybe that's what he would do. Spend the rest of his life making up for all the time he lost at uncomfortable parties, being purposely arrogant and hurtful, and for every game he played after he realized it didn't make him happy anymore. Mathias managed a small smile. "Oh you know!" he said, trying to sound cheery. "I think I wanna take a break for a while! No more stuffy lame parties for a long time! I'll get a house somewhere nice and just have a good time!" Emil opened his mouth to respond, but his watch began beeping. He jumped up from his seat and stopped his watch. "Sorry! I have to...um...go...I'll be right back!" he said, practically bolting out. Mathias barely had time to process what happened before the door opened and a familiar figure walked through. Emil was right, he did come right back. Only something was different. Mathias got a second look and felt himself stiffen up. "No way," he whispered under his breath. Lukas was scanning the room with furrowed brows. He carefully made his way through the now more crowded bar, looking at every patron as if he lost something. Mathias found him jumping up from his seat and weaving his way through the tables and chairs towards Lukas. In all honesty, he had no idea what he was doing or what he was going to say to him once he got there. He just knew he had to meet Lukas. Ok, I'll open with an apology! Yeah! 'Sorry for being an ass during the interview!'. Then maybe I can ask him to get a drink or something or- Mathias felt something bump against his chest that caused him to take a step back. He snapped back to reality and noticed someone sprawled on the floor in front of him. "Woah are you ok!? My bad! I totally didn't see you there!" he cried out, a bit too loudly. Mathias stuck out his hand. The person on the floor sat up a bit, rubbing their arm. "Sorry...I'm just looking for my brother..." the person replied quietly. They reached out and grabbed Mathias's hand, finally making eye contact. And at that moment, Mathias knew it was all over. Lukas's hand was so soft and warm in his own, he couldn't imagine ever letting go of it. The feeling of his hands sent electricity through his veins. Falling to the ground made his hair a little messy, strands of blonde hair covering his face, and he was partially tangled up in a long white scarf. But what made Mathias know he was done for was Lukas's eyes. Like Emil, they were so blue they seemed violet, but Lukas's were different. They always seemed so cold in the pictures Mathias has seen of him. Those weren't the eyes he met. Mathias saw soft eyes, like a child's. There was concern in them, maybe even a little embarrassment. Lukas's eyes managed to see right through Mathias straight into his soul. He felt his heart flutter for a moment and a warmth spread to his cheeks. And with that, his whole world turned upside down. Lukas had already begun pulling himself up when he finally recognized the man attached to the hand. "Thank y- WAIT A MINUTE YOU'RE-" Lukas's grip on Mathias's hand slipped and he found he found himself crashing back onto the floor with another loud thud. All Mathias could manage to do was stare for a moment before forcing himself to offer his hand again, praying Lukas would take it. "Hi...I'm...um...I'm Mathias...nice to meet you..." was the only thing he could get to come out, feeling the least confident he'd ever felt in his life. Lukas hesitated for a moment before taking Mathias's hand.

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Next Chapter: 3-One-Way Screen a/n: I'm so excited to be writing this! Things are definitely gonna start getting more interesting in the next chapter!  I’m going to take this time to plug my non-hetalia work “ Intro to Love ” about a college student who

struggles to keep her superpowers a secret and while making new friends.  How much of her normal life will she give up to save her friends from a mysterious villain that drains students’ brains and turns them into zombies? The complete Chapter 1 is out NOW! And Chapter 2.1-'The last of the Good Days' will be out in the next couple of days! Thanks again for reading! Send some feedback my way! Can’t wait to continue this story! Quotev link: here

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

HGPC 17 - 21 | Koi to Producer 2 - 6 | Appare 5 - 8 | Fugou Keiji 4 - 6

...only just realised I was missing some tags. They should be there now or soon.

HGPC 17

Why do I get the feeling the Sawaizumi family will be held hostage one day…? (Maybe I’m just being negative?)

The episode title mentions Chiyu by name, so I wonder why the translation didn’t…

Customer service! You can’t get away from it, even in COVID times…! (Impressive!)

Hmm…you can actually read part of the booking for the Smiths in the book if you know the kanji.

I thought the Smiths would speak in English, but they actually speak in fluent Japanese if the word “susume” was any indication.

Ah, Sukoyaka sweet buns! (from the other episode about the festival)

HGPC 18

Don’t burn down your house with scented candles, kids!

Also remember to use your knees when lifting heavy boxes! (<- says a charity store volunteer, who does this stuff on the regular)

These days the mascots usually have a human form. I wonder if this is implying that particular direction…? (I woke up today and was craving a certain oneshot I’d read during my scanlation days…if it is, it would fill that niche nicely.)

I wonder if the kids will recognise this Ashita no Joe parody…?

HGPC 19

“…since you were young?”

Oh! Element of Wind again!

Koi to Producer 2

This almost feels like Victor is assigning a school project to Protag-chan…it’s a bit sad, really.

It’s nice they let Protag-chan have a personality.

It’s fine if you can’t read the katakana, but Gavin’s name is Haku in Japanese, so it throws out the immersion somewhat…also, I know I shouldn’t be complaining – I’m the target audience here – but do these guys look kinda similar or what…? (partially kidding)

High school sweethearts, huh? “Childhood friends” is my favourite angle of a romantic relationship, but it gets so overused by harems it comes around to being boring…!

I-Is this Stand My Heroes…?! (LOL…?)

Can we not with 1st person cam…?

As cute and dorky as this stuff gets…how does Gavin never get found?! Does nobody ever look up in this city?!? (I thought Evolvers were meant to be a secret…?)

GPS tracker? That’s no better than large corporations using your location data…Isn’t that creepy…?

Hold on, when did she get his phone number? You would assume it was before this entire chase after the boy happened, but still…?

LOL, the English on the board.

This anime is gonna cause me some frustration, but it gives the good stuff in roughly equal measure. It seems to omit the fact you interact via phone with your bois for intimacy (in the game).

Koi to Producer 3

LOL, that’s so clearly Gavin…

By googling, you find out Uptown and Queens are in New York.

Ohmygosh! Did the creators know I love the trope where only people with superpowers can move in certain circumstances?!

Uh…his name is Kira in Japanese? Did someone read the katakana wrong?

Pictured: Depressed bishonen eating bad pudding. (…That joke sounds better in my head. I forgot what meme I was meant to be parodying there, but I had a meme in mind.)

Lemme guess…this man (I dunno if it’s one of the previous bishies with an identical face or a new one) is looking for MC-chan. *sigh* Update: Yep, just Victor again. To be honest, I don’t like anyone who calls harsh words “their sign of love” – love should be honest and upfront. That’s how it becomes heartmelting.

Koi to Producer 4

Okay, in order, it seems to be hexadecimals, Javascript (you can tell from the “const”), some kind of profiles which are apparently for human lab rats (which seem to have some kind of nonsense filler text), a DNA model and DNA bases (ACGT).

The text on the screen says something along the lines of this being an official broadcast of this man’s arrest and this man was a genetic researcher. Obviously, if I wanted to put more attention into what it meant, I would, but I won’t sweat the details this time (because it doesn’t seem to impact the plot).

The guy’s name is Minor because minor key (geddit?)…that’s my guess.

I started playing the game due to this anime, if you didn’t know, and I unlocked an expert in ch. 2. I thought he was Minor, but turns out his name is Spine (an older man).

The diary, true to form, contains details about either one case or several cases, two involving children. The bottom of the 1st page says “if it’s fake, I’ll laugh”.

Hey, I once told Crunchyroll I wanted an anime about hacking (so is this a dream come true? I reveal all in the next sentence!). Hackers don’t congregate like this…they’d be too conspicuous, even with the secret hideout!

The code in the top left appears to be…C? I think? (Note they declare “unsigned int”.)

Kiro sometimes reminds me of Masayoshi (SamFlam)…it puts a derpy smile on my face.

*blah blah blah I’m Key* - Wuh…? F*** you, Kiro!!! (There is such a thing as piling too much cool stuff on to a character, y’know – I’m guilty of it in my own writing.)

3684 isn’t a very safe password (says someone who once aspired to be in cybersecurity).

What bugs me is that Simon is a perfectly fine name…it’s just a bit boring. Kiro/Kira I get (a bit), but Lucien/Simon…? *shrugs*

Ohh! Based MAPPA! Thank you for making this adaption look great!

Koi to Producer 5

Oh, I got an SR in the game recently and it has a line like, “Only a fool stays up all night to do others’ work. Victor talks like that a lot…

The sign so obviously says “Renka”, meaning “love flower”. “Loveland” really is a step down from that…

Where’s Gavin’s guest badge…?

“Happiness Noodle Store”…?

“…the end of our first year…”

If this weren’t a Chinese work by origin (or Japanese work by translation), I’m sure Protag-chan would have gone after Gavin, despite being told the contrary.

Kanya = Minor. I’ll take a note of that.

One of the books behind Minor says “Gale Start”…hmm…

That GPS tracker is still unintentionally creepy, IMHO.

Koi to Producer 6

…oh. (dejected) Probably a beach episode or something.

What the actual heck was going on with Lucien…? It’s like he was having a tiny stroke there…

Lucien’s power is listed as “???” in the game. I thought he was an aura-reader when he said “show me your colour”, but that shield thing he did means he might just have various psychic powers…? *shrugs* We’ll find out eventually.

Running in heels is hard…

LOL, that’s so clearly recreating a CG from one of the cards.

This is the 2nd time this has gone pseudo-isekai. As much as I like to joke about it…I fully expect someone to be sent to another world at this point.

I couldn’t possibly see Victor on any kind of game show, come to think of it.

Appare 5

This guy’s middle name is “Rich”! That’s silly!

A boombox from the 19th century…makes sense, somehow.

I only just (?) realised Al has a tiny tie on his usual outfit.

Back to the beginning already…just start!

Appare 6

…I just realised Appare mouths “I got it!” in the OP.

Al Lion (sic…?)

Isn’t Sofia in that train…? Update: She might have been, she might not. Hard to tell when they don’t confirm.

This series seriously could’ve done with a dub…Even with weird hokey Hetalia accents, it would be good stuff.

These bunches of people at designated points…reminds me of the book I was reading while in Japan. The Long Walk by Stephen King (part of a compilation). It still gives me shivers down my spine when I remember it.

This “leave in the middle of the night” thing reminds me of the Amazing Race.

“Valley of Despair” is made-up, but Death Valley exists. It’s one of the hottest places on earth, hence the name.

LOL, Kosame scores himself one (1) prarie dog and two (2) Hototos.

I thought Appare was being inconsiderate at first…but he’s being considerate, in his own way.

Oh! I didn’t realise, but Saito Soma is Al.

Appare 7

“It’s not one plus one, but one times one!” – LOL.

Hybrid engine? In the 1900s? Hmm…

LOL, I think Al just did a hadouken.

This stuff’s like an animated Galaxy Brain meme! It’s amazing!

I managed to successfully predict – without watching ahead – Appare would catch himself with his traps.

Kosame with his hair down…is rare. Not exactly attractive because we have to care about the racers rather than lust after them (and the artstyle actually prevents me from doing so, because it’s deliberately quite cartoony), but it’s rare.

Appare is surprisingly childish…that’s what makes him more than a Sheldon Cooper, I think.

The spelling of the place is actually “Ely”, if Google-sensei is any indication. C’mon, subbers! You’re American (most likely)! Can’t you put in the legwork (or the Google-fu) to discover what place in Nevada this is?!

Subbers make characters say “shit” a lot in this show, hmm? (contemplative)

Now this evil guy here *points to screen*…that’s hair I like.

Appare 8

I just love this OP…don’t you?

I like how the steam/gas boat/car has Chinese numerals on its dial.

Kosame means “small rain”, so “heavy rain” is obviously to contrast that.

The Hototo joke never gets old.

I thought I just saw someone leave the saloon…

Nice hair + terrible face = bad equation.

I can almost imagine the wee-oo-wee-oo-ooooooo…wah-wah-wahhh…(You know the one sound snippet, right? The one theme from The Good, the Bad and the Ugly - or whatever movie it is – that maybe involves a tumbleweed rolling across the screen, and then a huge shootout? If you don’t know it, play a sample on this Wikipedia page!) playing in the background.

It’s convenient the prarie dog didn’t appear when Hototo (old) had his revenge spree.

I noticed there’s a bit of a mark under Kosame’s left eye…it suggests that he’s been crying (or maybe it shows tiredness from the race…?), but it’s not that noticeable.

So that’s the real Gil…and tose were his henchmen that threatened to hang everyone bar Kosame. Got it.

(notes to self) So, for charting a course with Appare Ranman!, it’s Los Angeles -> Death Valley -> Ely -> Denver -> ??? -> New York. Got it.

Fugou Keiji 4

“Daisuke-sama” isn’t “Lord Daisuke”, it would be “Sir Daisuke”, I think…but “lord” has a proper translation in Japanese.

The truck has a Shinagawa licence plate. Anime really does like Shinagawa, huh? (Based on ID: INVADED and this.)

I think it’ll be interesting to see Kambe handle this without HEUSC.

The board for Sanchome (which is equivalent to a suburb…or a county, I guess?) has posters saying stuff like “take your dog poop home” and “let’s protect the environment!” (technically, it says “let’s protect the region/area!”, but that doesn’t translate right. There’s even a flea market. Still, those posters don’t have any big hints…not that I know of so far.

I kind of forgot that dude was the gardener for Kambe’s house…er, mansion.

I noticed a poster in the kouban says haru (spring) on it. That’s probably the same one that Haru’s name is signified by, assuming that’s not in combo with another character or few.

Oh great…the sister is an overbearing one.

Ahh…he doesn’t like natto. So that’s the problem. Daisuke is childish (like Appare)…Note I don’t like natto either, but I wouldn’t run away from home (or similar) because I was fed natto.

I noticed Kambe uses shinseki (which doesn’t refer to close family). “Relative” is a correct translation of that word, I just wanted to check that word was the right one for the context.

There’s a green tea bottle by the sink…I don’t think I’d mistake that shade of green for anything else.

LOL, I didn’t think we’d actually get to see Kambe with his hair “down”, so to speak. It’s…an interesting look, for sure.

Oh my gosh! It cost him (Haru) $15!!! (LOL, cheapskate…says the cheapskate…*suddenly droops and stops laughing*) Update: Sorry about the sudden downer there. I was having what the kids these days call a “woke moment”…at least, I think that’s how they use that term.

…I’d watch that crime drama. It’s funny.

Just realised Kato has an older model of phone than Kambe does.

This episode was kinda like a Tokyo Sonata kind of thing, huh? The sensational in the middle of the not-so-sensational…”sensational” for this show, anyway.

Those kids look like the ones from Erased.

*lightbulb goes off in brain* What if the dog went to Kambe’s…?

Can Suzue actually hear HEUSC while Kambe is using it…? $2.46 though…that is cheap, in comparison to the ham.

This was the cheapest episode so far (about $550)…probably because it was an insight into Kato’s life, more than Kambe’s.

Fugou Keiji 5

The flag seems to be based on Cameroon’s (which is in Africa, not America) and the “Arita Kinen” seems to refer to Arima Kinen, meaning this episode is set around Christmas-ish. Credit goes to Kambe Zaibatsu on this show.

I-It’s a Humvee!

Polyadoll (sic)…?

The Poliador guy speaks perfect Japanese…(?)

The star! It’s a key thingy!

I thought Kamei was the 1st Division dude with the reddish hair. Turns out it was the blonde…? Update: Redhead is Hoshino.

Ummmmmm…he was reading porn…? Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh…okayyyyyyyyyyyyy…

…oh, the costs for Kambe’s tuxedo are on there. So’s the cost for repairing the bike Suzue rode.

Fugou Keiji 6

I never knew there were so many money proverbs to be used as episode titles…

What is Kambe doing with his hands…? He’s not even using the computer.

Imura seems to use a Windows 10 with Cortana on the taskbar.

HGPC 20

What’s with all the Naruto running this episode…?

HGPC 21

(no notes, sorry!)

[eiridisia]

What's your ultimate OTP?

For what fandom my guy I'm in dozens and they all make me wanna cry in the good ways

I'll just give you my top five from all fandoms in No Particular Order

1. Hetalia - FrUk; First ship I got into for the fandom, have a lot of good memories rping it with two of my closest friends

2. Hetalia - Spamano; Second Ship I got into, absolutely adore, makes me die inside of happiness whenever I see it, sunshine x rage is just my be all end all dynamic

3. Harry Potter - Luna x Neville; it just feels right

4. Motherland Fort Salem - Raelle x Scylla; didn't like it at first bc "oh no the creepy Bad Vibes girl is the queer coded one ofc she's gonna be with cool lesbian main character" but they fuckin baited me with evil gay stereotype and she actually loves Raelle a lot and ( SPOILER AHEAD ) chooses her over the Spree so that's nice and honestly was a good change of pace imo switching it out for the other and y'know there's THAT WHOLE BOMBSHELL we got in the fuckin Finale I'm still not over it

5. ATLA - Kattaang; it's just really sweet how their whole relationship is first and foremost that they're best friends, and just happen to also like each other more than normal

All my OC ships would top this list of course but you didn't come here for me to ramble on and on about my OCs but I'm going to someday and there's nothing you can do about it

[thisnameisquitequeer]

Here’s a little something that got stuck in my head and I can’t work until I get it out

tw: homophobic language, homophobia, frank discussions, language

It was a warm June day outside of Austin when Bert came to visit. Well, it was always warm in June, except when an occasional thunderstorm rolled through and made the air cool and filled with a presence that she could never quite describe. But Stella noticed this particular day in June was warm, because her Albertan guest insisted on whining about how hot it was and how could she wear jeans at a time like this and yada yada. “You know, if you keep yapping like that you’re gonna get lock jaw.” she said, bringing him a cold shiner boch to shut him up. He huffed a bit at that “well if your place wasn’t so humid all the time. It’s like walking through a swamp” Stella snorted at that “well if SOMEONE wasn’t from a place with air that’s dryer than a desert, you might be able to handle it big boy” She joked, playfully reaching over to ruffle his messy golden hair like she was want to do and then stuck her tongue out “ew you’re sweaty” She said, dramatically holding her hand away from her body as she went over to the kitchen to wipe it on a hand towel. Bert rolled his eyes at that, “I’ll wash my face before my beer then” he said, standing up the way he often did where he looked as if he’d lean over any further he’d topple over. “Do you got any peanuts to go with these beers?” he called to her from the living room. “Does a bear shit in the woods?” she responded back playfully. He would take that as a yes, and sauntered off to the bathroom Stella got to cutting up some fresh lime for their beers and getting out the beer salt and peanuts. But it wasn’t long until Bert was standing in the breezeway between the kitchen and the living room. “Oh hey Bert, I got everything ready. Do you want any of my jalapeno ja-” she said, turning her head to speak to him but stopping in her tracks when she saw him holding her pansexual flag that had been sitting on her dresser in her room. She didn’t know what to say but started off with “why did you go into my room?” and he gave her a squinty eyed look at that “you didn’t have soap in your guest bathroom, so I went to use the one in your room”. He explained, looking over the flag. “Why do you have this weird flag? And why isn’t it on the wall like your Texas and Come and Take It flags?” He said, confused. Stella had always been one to be honest and open about things. She could often be overly blunt or explicit but this was one conversation she did not want to have. “It’s nothing. Just, just put it back” She said, going back to cleaning her knife and putting away her things. That answer didn’t seem to satisfy Bert. “Why won’t you tell me what it is? You never keep secrets from me.” He said defensively, with an emphasis on me. The two were close and while Stella did keep some things private, she almost never kept things from Bert unless it was something government based. “It’s not a secret I just don’t want to talk about it, look can we just go to the living room and drink our beers. She said, trying to get past Bert, but he could see how sensitive and defensive she was getting about it so he widened his stance in the doorway so she couldn’t pass. Stella pouted at that. “You’re being very childish Bert” she informed him. But he insisted on not moving and stared her down. She sighed “fine.” Stella said, setting the food back down on the stove top. “But you know if I wanted you to move I could just pick you up and throw you right?” He gave a reluctant nod at that. Although he didn’t like the idea of the small lady being stronger than him, he had to admit between her large military base and a population ten times his he wouldn’t have been able to stop her if she picked him up. Stella closed her eyes for a minute. She didn’t enjoy the idea of telling him this, especially so soon but it looked like she didn’t have a choice. “it’s a...it’s a pride flag.” She said simply, hoping that would be enough. But he just looked more confused. “Like...like a gay thing? But I thought those were rainbows? Are you a dyke now?” He said, looking over the flag and Stella groaned because she had no way out of this conversation. “Jesus Bert, there’s other pride flags and please don’t use that word” Bert stuck his chin up at that, “oh so now my best friend is a queer and part of the pc police?” he said, his defensive nature only raising at being told what to do. Stella kicked herself mentally, if she wanted to get Bert to understand she should have known better than to tell him what to do. “It’s...it’s a pansexual pride flag” she finally said and Bert laughed “PAN-sexual, what even is that? Is that supposed to be a real thing?” He said, not taking this seriously at all. “I-it is a real thing it’s-” He cut her off to joke some more “is that code for carpet munchers, you know because you both like to be in the kitchen?” he joked and Stella just got embarassed at that. She tried to start again “It’s more complicated than-” But Bert just kept going “Since when did you get into this pride stuff? I didn’t think you’d be the type to parade around and act indecent” He said, and that was the point where Stella had had enough “Oh yeah?” She said, raising her voice as she walked closer to him. “well I didn’t think you were the type to run off and spend all summer a few years ago at some guys house? Did that Newfie guy teach you how to pack fudge? Did you get really good at bending over?” She said, poking him in the chest. Stella didn’t mean these things, but when she was hurt she was all venom and she would recall any slight or past misdeed from years or decades ago just to make sure the other person could feel as hurt as her. She was ready for a shouting match, but she seemed to have struck a nerve because Berts eyes went dark and he simply said “don’t.” before setting the flag on the counter and walking past her to get to the living room. Stella hated when he got like this. She was the type to let it all out to tell the person exactly how she felt, but when she really made Bert angry or upset he just receded into himself like a turtle and sometimes she could never get him to come out again. She gave herself a few minutes to cool off, before going to the living room with the snacks and quietly sitting next to him as he silently drank his beer. “Look Bert I...I went too far I shouldn’t have said that. You just...well for a couple months he was all you would talk to me about and you would blush while talking about him, and then you just tell me all of a sudden that you’re not coming to visit me in the summer because you’re gonna be at his house. Well, I just kind of assumed...that you two were a thing. This statement didn’t seem to make Bert less prickly, but Stella kept going. “I didn’t tell you about this because well...I didn’t know if you would understand. You and me are really different when it comes to love and I’m a lot older than you so I’ve had more time to figure this stuff out.” She looked at Bert expecting a response, but he just kept looking straight forward and drinking his beer. “When I used to dress up like a man...I would have girls try and flirt with me and dance with me or ask me for a kiss. I told myself that it was fine because they weren’t attracted to me, they were attracted to the man that they thought I was. But then...I started dressing like a man...even when I didn’t have to. I started going to bars like that, secretly hoping that I could flirt with girls. It’s still hard for me to say this, which is why I haven’t told you. I’m still...figuring this out.” Stella stared at Bert for a moment, expecting a joke or a crude comment but he didn’t even look at her. He just kept drinking his beer. She sighed “oh come on Bert don’t go silent on me, say something!” she said, always a bit frustrated by his silent treatment. “Do you want my approval or something?” Bert said a bit defensively. “Now you should know by now that I don’t need anyones approval Bertie” She said, trying to lighten the situation. “I don’t need you to approve or understand me. We’re two different people after all. But I want to be able to tell my best friend if I meet someone cute that I’m attracted to. And I’m not a lesbian, I still like men too. And if you happened to like men too. Well I would be happy to lend a ear if you found someone cute.” She offered, trying to make him feel a little more at ease. “Well...I guess that’s not so bad” He mumbled against the lip of his longneck. Stella smiled at him and patted his back. Why don’t we go take a dip in the pool after we finish our drinks?” She offered and Bert just nodded in reply. Stella hoped that this would all be okay in the end.

and THAAAAAAATS all I have for now. I’ve been thinking a lot about Stella and how I would classify her sexuality but probably the simplest way to put it is “it’s complicated...but probably pansexual” and I think that her and Bert both have a lot of complicated feelings when it comes to sexuality. I don’t think either character is truly homophobic, but they both have their own issues to work out Stella is my hetalia OC for Texas and Bert is the hetalia oc for Alberta that is used in the IAMP/PC universes

[blue-likethebird]

Vee El Dee: The Good The Bad and The Ugly

If you’ve ever been on this hellsite, you’ve probably heard of Voltron: Legendary Defender. You’ll find the characters and the ships (and the discourse. Dear God the discourse) in tag after tag and on blog after blog. Now that the show has officially come to an end, I’m reviewing the whole damn thing. Talking about what I think worked, what didn’t, and what exactly the show did to make even the fans look at it so harshly now. (Just a warning “The Ugly” section discusses racism, and homophobia so if any of that triggers you I’d suggest you skip it)

Review under the cut

The Good

The Character Potential:

   Voltron’s characters had so much potential at the beginning. Their motivations, potential subplots, and clues to their arcs the first crew left us were actually interesting. How did Coran know Allura before they were frozen? What happened that caused Shiro to lose his arm? Is Lance going to reunite with his family? The show didn’t answer all of these questions mind you, but at the time they were introduced, those questions felt like they were worth sticking around to hear the answers.

The First Season:

   The first season is the only season that genuinely sticks out for me, way back in ye olden days when Voltron was a character driven show as opposed to plot focused. In season one, the plot took a backseat and the characters were what held up the show, and it’s probably not a coincidence that most of the character development and more emotional/memorable scenes occurred in season one, when there was time for the characters to develop. Likewise, the character focus allowed for everyone to get their day in the limelight -not just the characters who were valuable to the plot at the moment-.

The Balmera and The Return to The Balmera:

     I am never gonna be shy about my opinion that the Balmera arc is one of the strongest arcs that Voltron has had. Allura using the story of her people to inspire others and using Altea’s ancient connection to the Balmera to save an entire damn civilization! The goddamn adorable chemistry between Hunk and Shay! Believable suspense! Unlocking Lion Powers! The Balmera arc had it all and I was fed. Plus, Balmera gave us the introduction of the most blessed couple in Voltron history, hunay.

The Bad:

The Timeskips:

In theory, there’s nothing wrong with a timeskip. But you’ve gotta be able to show that the characters and show’s universe changed in some way during that timeskip and you can’t use them just to avoid actual story and character development. Take season six (? Or was it five? I don’t remember and I don’t wanna) when Keith and Krolia take a two year camping trip on a space whale while Voltron is off doing God knows what. Presumably during that time they developed some sort of mother-son relationship but we don’t get to see that development happening, or how that new relationship changed them, or really any proof that the timeskip happened at all besides Keith getting Galra marks and a teleporting space wolf. That particular time jump felt more like a cop-out to avoid writing Keith bonding with his mom.

Pacing:

To put it plainly, the pace is way too fast for anything to stick. The writing cycles from one season's worth of plot twists and WTF? moments to the next at the speed of light, leaving no time to address how the previous events affected the characters involved or not the show’s universe as a whole. So Lotor was actually evil all along and was using Allura to achieve his goals? Well there’s no time to mention how Allura feels about that, we’ve got three more surprise twists and a magic robot to shove into the plot! On the flip side however, the pacing is slower than a geriatric snail during fight scenes. The giant robot fights are usually the most exciting part of anything, but in Voltron, the fights are so formulaic that they just kinda… blur together into a boring fog. Lemme know if you can name this Voltron fight scene: the team’s fighting some random baddie, there’s a lot of yelling, someone gets a power up just big enough to defeat the current baddies when a bigger, eviler baddie appears who’s more powerful than the power up they just got, new baddie whoops Voltron’s ass, the support team watches in horror, someone else gets a power up that’s powerful enough to defeat the new bad guy, Voltron reins triumphant. What fight scene was that?

The Filler Episodes:

The fast pacing also means that they need to set aside breather episodes just to allow characters to interact besides in battle. That’s all well and good and there’s nothing wrong with filler episodes, if done right they can be some of the most memorable episodes a show can have (The Tales of Ba Sing Se anyone?) that is, if done right. But Voltron filler episodes don’t have that going for them. Filler episodes in vee el dee are an oasis of mud in the desert that is canon, they’re a generally unhelpful standstill point amidst a constantly changing series. I’ll admit that they can be funny at times but for the most part filler episodes are bizarre, unnecessary, and more often than not, poorly timed. If we just heard about a millenniums old empire folding in on itself and we’re just about to see a major character attempt suicide do we really need to see Coran go batshit while planning a space Disney On Ice?

The Ugly:

Racism:

#justiceforallura

I must confess that I am whiter than a polar bear in a snowstorm, but even I know that killing off a black girl (or black coded as the case may be), constantly torturing the Japanese guy, reducing the Samoan guy to food and fat jokes, and having the latino guy flirt with everyone before turning him into a farmer isn’t the best way to handle writing characters of colour. Denying said characters of colour arcs and screen time in favour of giving your white characters the same story in a different hat over and over again is also not the best treatment you can offer your poc characters. That’s not even mentioning other horrible treatment and stereotypes you’ll see the Voltron characters of colour experience. Let us also recall #notallgalra, the “what if the genocide victim was actually the bad guy” au mess in s3, all those “lol lance is stupid” jokes, the black character Kinkade speaking mainly in grunts, Allura dying to redeem the two genocidal dudes responsible for most of her trauma, and Hunk’s (half black half Samoan) family being enslaved at a fucking concentration camp like goddamn what the hell were you thinking Voltron that’s like hetalia levels of fucked up when we remember what kind of genuinely awful shit this show’s done to it’s minority characters.

Homophobia:

If you’re reading my review in the Voltron tag, and you watched the whole series, then there’s no way in hell that you haven’t heard about Adam dying and the backlash against Voltron for it. If you are somehow the .000001% of people who don’t know, Adam (a gay moc) was Shiro’s (another gay moc) fiancé who got a grand total of forty five seconds of screen time before dying when the Galra invaded earth. Meanwhile, L*tor and Allura’s relationship got almost triple that despite being abusive as fuck. But Shiro got married at the end of season 8! In a credits scene, to a guy in the background of a couple of scenes Shiro was also in. When lgbt fans expressed outrage at their rep being hyped up despite having no bearing on the plot or even Shiro as a character outside of one scene, instead of owning up to their mistakes, the crew of Vee El Dee said (or implied) that it was the fault of lgbt fans for hyping ourselves up. Yeah okay. Except after that we got confirmation that Ezor and Zethrid were a couple! Yay! Clearly a win for us El Gee Bee Tees right? Well… not really considering that both of them were depicted as psychotic torturers who also died a couple minutes later. Gotta love those crazy dead lesbians amirite?

Klance:

But why is klance in the “ugly” section!? You cry, I thought you were a klanti! I am an anti and I did ship klance but that’s not what I wanna talk about right now. When I put klance under ugly I wanted to discuss two things, the crew and the shippers. First let’s talk the crew; several folks on the Voltron staff have at the very least, not reacted negatively to the omnipresent ship that is Keith and Lance. I’m sure you’ll also remember that Lance’s VA Jeremy Shada was considered a KICK icon before that went south. The crew was also purposefully misleading when they talked about possible romances for Keith and Lance, the language they used was ambiguous enough that shippers interpreted it as proof that klance would become canon. When it inevitably didn’t and shit hit the fan, the staff backpedaled again. Stating that klance was never meant to be interpreted as romantic and we were all fools for thinking otherwise. That’s happened in the past so it’s a reasonable defence, except for the fact that scenes with Keith and Lance tended to contain unnecessary parallels to canonically romantic relationships, (the bonding moment paralleling an allurance scene in season six and their talk at the start of season eight paralleling two scenes, hunay in season one and l*tura in season five). So it’s not unreasonable to be a little suspicious there. Klance was huge on the internet, it’s impossible for the crew to have been completely unaware of what they were doing.

Next I wanna talk shippers. I’m not saying that being disappointed that a ship didn’t become canon is a bad thing. But when you act like that’s the worst thing Voltron did amidst the sea of ableism, racism and homophobia it gets a little tiring. The fact that so many klancers rushed to demonize Allura after season seven and eight and add on that I saw more people complaining about klance not becoming canon king than Allura dying a completely unnecessary death to redeem L*tor of all people was the final straw. I washed my hands of klance and Voltron as a whole.

———————————————

So that’s my review of V*ltron. I was gonna do a separate review of season eight but I didn’t even finish s8 and to be honest it probably wouldn’t have been any more than the words “Fuck Vee El Dee, Allura Deserved Better” in big pink letters. And I know I probably made someone angry with this review but if you actually managed to stick around my ramblings all the way to the end then I salute you regardless of whether or not you agree with me.

[zdravstvuysclntse]

DISCLAIMER: Before I begin I wanna re-establish that NOBODY has to agree with or even like my Lore, especially since this particular post is on a Canon Character. These are purely my headcanons and my thoughts as to how this canon character would fit into my lore, I am not about to force these ideas/headcanons onto anyone. Okay? Ooookay.

I. Love Prussia.

Honest to God, I really do, he’s easily one of the most interesting characters in Hetalia, and my Lord has he given me a lot to think about in terms of my lore.

Just in case some of y’all haven’t read through any of my lore posts before, I’ve previously mentioned the anomaly of dissolved Nations and how they slowly and painfully cease to function in this post (there’s blood in the header image so tw for that.) With this quote:

“Then, of course, you get the sad state of a Representative who’s status is slowly dissolving, which – I hasten to add – is why I like APH Prussia so much. That guy has given me a lot to think about, since dissolution would absolutely be a damning part of a Rep just slowing down and growing weaker and weaker until they’re pretty much human. I’ve seen a l o t of theories as to how Prussia would change in the build up to/during his dissolution, but personally, I think he’d just gradually lose everything that made him a Rep, including his healing-rate. I think it would all just slowly and painfully grind to a halt because, quite simply, he wouldn’t need it anymore. It’s a horrible thing to think about, but a Rep’s healing-rate is like the cogs in a machine, and once those cogs jam, the whole thing just shuts down.”

BUUUUUUUT, as you can see, that little excerpt up there is incredibly brief and pretty vague, so it definitely needs to be elaborated on, since a dissolved Nation is a really interesting thing to think about. I also made that post quite a while ago and since then, I’ve though up a few more ideas besides Reps just slowly becoming human when they lose their status.

PLUS: In the grand scheme of things, I think it would be pretty hard for them to “lose their status” just like that in the first place. These guys are pretty much Gods, and if you think about it, vanquishing a God is not easy at all, which is probably part of the reason why poor, dear old Gilbert is still around, as Nonna so rightly said once:

“… We can’t die anyway. You are living and breathing proof of that!”

My theory? Gilbert isn’t dead because he doesn’t want to die. Dissolved Nation/City/whatever Reps, deal with dissolution in different ways. Some of them – as previously mentioned – simply accept their fate, and live with the fact that they will eventually lose their immortality and die. BUT, others will actually latch on to whatever their old land becomes and flat-out refuse to let go, but will have to make do with becoming the back up Rep, the spare, and take the back seat to the newly established Rep.

I think that this is what Gilbert has done.

He still has a stubborn mental hold on and connection to what used to be his land, even though he isn’t the land’s Rep anymore, Reps can actually do this if they’re in a good enough mind-set and if their sheer, raw desire to hold on is strong enough. I’ve never drawn Gilbert before (apart from that 10-minute doodle up there on the post-header) but I imagine him to be a pretty solidly built Rep, kinda tall and lanky but sinewy as fuck. I’m not 100% on Prussian history but I know that the guy did a lotta fightin’, so I reckon it’s safe to assume that he’d be tough as old boots by now. With this in mind, a war-hardened old Rep like him would absolutely have the mental and physical capability to hold on to what used to be his as tightly as he can and outright reject his fate. Sure, he doesn’t have his status anymore, but the fact that he forcefully keeps himself tied to something keeps him alive, it isn’t an ideal existence, but it’s still an existence and that’s all he’s aiming for. (It probably helps that the land he’s holding onto belongs to his brother, too)

But really, what else could you hope to aim for if you were in his shoes? Beggars can’t be choosers.

However, this has an… Interesting effect on his body and on all the things that makes a Rep so durable. For all intents and purposes, he should be dead, his body should have ceased to function because it just isn’t needed anymore, it has no land to Represent. But because he’s stubborn and also capable enough to refuse to let this beat him, his body kind of hasto keep on functioning like normal, only it doesn’t, not fully anyway.

Therefore, my interpretation of Gil has good days and bad days. On some days, everything might be fine and he’ll be able to go about his daily business, but other days he might not even be able to get out of bed, purely because he should be dead. Because of his stubbornness, his body is now stuck in a horrible, confusing loop of desperately trying to shut itself down as a sign that his time is over, while also constantly trying to heal itself because mentally he still believes that that land is his. That strain does definitely get to him sometimes, and he probably does spend quite a lot of his time relying on others to help him out with basic stuff. It isn’t an ideal situation for him to be in at all, but in his mind, it’s better than giving up and dying, and he’s willing to keep himself stuck in this loop until he just can’t hold on anymore.

Honestly? I think he sees it as one last battle, assuming that what I’ve read of his history has had any effect on him (which it probably has.) He probably sees this whole struggle as a final time to fight through and to show everyone that he can still carry on for as long as he can despite literally all the odds being against him. However, the sad truth is; despite his efforts, it will eventually beat him, there isn’t really a way for a Rep to hold on like this permanently, it will gradually become too much for them to deal with no matter how strong-willed they are.

(There is… Also a very nasty side-effect that happens, which is kinda hinted at in the header art… but that’s another story for another day……)

But nevertheless, for now and for as long as he is able, by God, Prussia going to grip onto what he knew with both hands and not let go.

[apryllfool]

So I saved the things I thought of a few days ago because I didn’t want to write them in disjointed bullet points... but here we are

* N.S.: The most interesting idea I considered was one Jazzy and Flame know, but I dunno if they told aku!! So, that one was about N.S. trying to transform himself-- and maybe first, his ‘new mother’-- into a dream person, instead of a nightshift. Probably painful, maybe impossible-- but you did tell him to find ‘another way,’ mother~! (Apparently dream people don’t really need to be sustained like the nightshifts, so y’know. If there’s another way, maybe he could try that too-- but we’ll see!) 

* My magical sister girl to Aku’s bo y: (she needs a name r i p... maybe Electra...). But I still have trouble deciding on her personality. I think she’s pretty quiet in nature, but she seems to have fun with the magic and playing games and things! It’s not really a cold, quiet-- but after running away and being separated from her brother, that might change.

* Okay s o, I really already like the dynamic laid out of the Lolcatz and I really didn’t want to disrupt that,, , b u t, I heard the name Zenith or it fell out of the air, and I just think it’s a really cool name that deserves to be a hacker’s, thank you. 

* I also like the name Axel, so I’ll see about that. 

* Sophie: I wanna re-work her past! It does feel like she was orphaned, but it almost feels like that was for a super short time. And I know she was homeless for at least a day following that. She remembers that kinda vividly, before Jian came to help her. If anyone watched hetalia and know Lichtenstein and Switzerland’s first meeting, it felt kinda like that to her-- ? Y e. 

Anyways, I was considering if one of her parents walked out on the other, and maybe she was pushed to live with a grandparent who later died. Feels like someone might’ve been loose with money around her so I dunno,,,,

But she also feels like she could’ve had a science-y dad who accidentally killed someone in her family-- (consider the mother, and maybe her having a burn and scars from it)-- and been jailed for manslaughter, but more on that later. 

I alsoooo think she likes enclosed spaces, and if Jian is ever looking for her, she may be curled up in the closet, so there she b e. (I’m curious what his first thought may have been after finding her there.....) I have no idea what I’ll go with but ehhh! Maybe a combination of all of it,,

Also consider Riyu waiting in a closet... waiting for someone to ‘find her’. sm H Maybe she’d hide in Takumi’s closet, consider tha t,,,,, I also wanna rework her backstory but hhh more on that later also--,,

* Reina: I’ve noticed that she thinks alot about the past, and present (the most?), but isn’t too keen on thinking for the future. Some of her actions I think should reflect that-- though I can’t think of too many cases,,, but I think that’s where her temperament lies, at least?? The fact that she may not figure a problem would result from her actions, and those consequences catching up to her later. I think she has trouble owning up to something being her fault, too but I dunno. 

And lastly, I don’t think she is one yet-- but I want to shape her into a more resourceful character. I mean nothing’s happened to her yet but-- Also, I’m still thinking about it alot but I want her to be hecked by ‘Suki’ alot, thank you flame for making me look forward to that.

* Shotaro: (y’all know some of these but, here I have listed): 1. Blood Weapons. (I don’t think he’s only getting his blood from Deja and Sorina-- if you know what I mean. Maybe he uses some of his own-- unlikely it’s alot, but I feel like he may go find bodies as well..... maybe some left behind by a few rasetsu.... though it seems gross to him-- it may be one of his only ways to get it, from the dead. Which he would do if he thought it’d get him closer to a. finishing his teachers work, or b. bringing his teacher back to life)

2. We’ve established that he’s not above drugging you guys’ food. (Imagine him standing over one of your beds and muttering an ‘I’m sorry’, but like is h e,,) 

3. Newest info: I imagine he would use the fact that Sorina and Deja can’t read Japanese to his advantage. There’s no real need to hide most of that information, then, ya dig? And I feel like some of his pages have Deja and Sorina’s ‘stats’, or information like weight, height, how they react to this or that. I feel like it’s kinda creepy, but eh! I imagine he has some sort of desk in his room, but also in the living room. The one out in the open seems to have a lot of papers on it-- pretty disorganized. But in his room he may have organized notes... those may be his teachers actual notes. All neat and organized in his room-- treated with the respect they deserv e.

4. I considered him looking into the red-eyed rumors if he ever heard about it, or wanted to consider it ma y b e. I don’t know if he would hear about it since it seemed it was passing through schools, and he doesn’t really get around much so fl o p s. But if he found out anything about dead people coming back to life, I think that’s a route he could go down.

5. I think he is kinda focused on bringing people back too-- or one person in particular. But I dunno if that was part of the wizards goals with his experiments-- that can be for an aku to decide. But I know he wants to bring the wizard back, at least.

6. Consider Shotaro being a doctor to Deja whenever he gets sick tho. They can’t afford the medical bills, after all. Sure you don’t trust him, but what other option do you have? He probably will only pull minor tricks then.... and not at first. He’ll try and gain your trust. But-- seriously he would nurse them both back to health though, seriously. He’d read the medicine labels outloud and be like ‘well this s a y s it cures colds, and I hate Nyquil as much as the next guy but he y.’ For Deja, he may need to try some other medicines though-- which he would try and concoct safely. He should know a bit about what your body reacts to, so,,,, 

7. He’s learning kinda dark magic-y stuff, but consider that he only teaches the small things to Sorina. When she wants to learn more it’s just like: ‘Sorry, teacher died before I could learn anything else from him, k b y e’

8. Last thing written was that he’s “not sure whether to love or hate his ‘new family’.” ...

9. But there’s also that fact that he’s a patronizing asshole? Well, I don’t know why because he seriously doesn’t judge them for not knowing Japanese that well or being able to read-- or for being ignorant to anything else. Like really, who would? Makes no sense to him for that to happen when they know two languages well enough to be fluent in either. But still... he might look down on them for something. It’s not like he thinks he’s better though, so.. hmnnn. Maybe it’s more of a superiority thing in thinking they need him... when deep down he’s sure they don’t. Or maybe it’s just jealousy. He feels separate from the two, a bit. 

But anyway, enought on THAT loser! Moving on...~!:

* There was also me considering something of a military man whose wife and kid(s?) had been taken to be used as leverage during a war-- with only the kid being able to escape. I considered the possibility of either the kid escaping on his own, or staying with his mother and being killed... then maybe he could be a dream boy. Or maybe there were two siblings-- and one stayed while the other went...~

Also Ren’s been feeling really bad but he’s just stupid and won’t let me say why yet, it’s fin e. Has to do with Shio and Kyo tho so it’s probably kinda obvious but also ehhhhh