#Wow this is in both my personal and analysis tag

[finisnihil]

Heyo ATLA fan over here I keep seeing people praise the live action remake for being darker than the original and citing that the original cant be darker because it's animated and. I have thoughts on this.

The original ATLA couldn't get super gore type dark because of its RATING not its MEDIUM, it was being produced by a kid's channel. Animated media CAN be dark and NO i'm not talking about "adult cartoons". Look at shows like Blue Eye Samurai. Any DC animated movie. Animation is constantly associated with being childish just because its most often used in children's media and I mostly blame Disney for that because Disney is my arch-enemy.

Regardless, ATLA IS STILL DARK. IT'S STILL SUPER FUCKING DARK. The entire plot of the show and it’s themes center around really heavy topics like war, genocide, the rewriting of history, child abuse, oppression, deconstructing societal roles, the place of mercy in extreme circumstances, redemption, death and grief, trauma, and so so so much more ATLA was never subtle about its themes it just communicated them in a way that wasn’t overtly gore based and didn't have cussing.

Hell just look at Kyoshi she's literally documented as being ruthless in her persuit of peace, a foil to Aang and his ideals, and when you read her spin-off books you see why. Her childhood friend and crush who was raised under the false belief that he was the Avatar was fucking sacrificed in front of her face and later came back as a shambling husk of his former self that she had to put down like a rabid dog. She survived getting hit with lightning by a crime lord. She spent her early days as Avatar being hunted down by a man who raised her, who’s nickname was the Gravedigger because he buried his enemies alive after making them dig their own graves. That’s not even the full of it either. Kyoshi NEEDED to become ruthless to survive and you see that mindset in the Kyoshi Warriors and the Dai Li because those two groups are her legacy, she trained them, the darkness of her life bled over into that worldbuilding. When Aang asks her advice about Ozai she tells him to kill the bastard no questions asked because in her time hesitation on such things as mercy over justice is what got you killed.

I have so many thoughts about ATLA and it feels like many people miss the point. ATLA did not need to be given a “darker” medium to excel because it already excelled in its original one because live action is not adult media and animation is not child media and from what i’ve heard about the series it feels like the show forgot this is a story of children growing up in a hostile world that rests it’s fate on their shoulders.

The tone of the original show was childish despite it's incredibly dark themes and content because we were seeing the world through the eyes of Aang, Katara, and Sokka and later, Toph. Toph and Zuko's perspectives are way more jaded and darker because that's how they see the world and it's around when they become more involved we start seeing things with more weight than before. We don't need the show to be darker to be greater, it was great as it was because it was build on dark themes but did not let itself become drowned in them.

[honnelander]

surprises

WOW OK i can't believe i did this!! i needed a small break from my writer's block with Sanji and wanted to try my hand at another opla character that i find really interesting! and cute i'm sorry this was a lot of fun to write and i enjoyed the change of pace so i hope you enjoy! if you want to be tagged in any of my work, please read this

gif credit @zsuo

WARNINGS: none

word count: 2k

pairing: opla!buggy x reader

summary: reader is on 'clown duty' on the Going Merry while the crew searches for Nami, but the more you talk with Buggy, the more you realize you like him.

masterlist

taglist: @yarnnerdally @miloonmetis @fa1rybubbl3z @feelinmatcha @buggy0827 @uncomfortableshoelace @notasgard @deserticwren @shadydeanmuffin @ohsilk @antrenna @laviiv

Ok, you’ll admit it, you’ll finally admit it. You were finally going to admit to yourself the tiny, stupid, and annoying thought that has been plaguing the back of your mind for days now: 

You thought the clown was hot. 

Even saying that small, little sentence to yourself in your mind made you cringe and want to smack yourself into next week. 

You thought the clown was attractive? Buggy the freaking clown? Buggy, the flashy fool? Buggy, the... what, something-something jester? The guy that constantly wore that silly circus make up all the time, so you didn’t really know what his face even looked like exactly? The person who rivaled Usopp in always having the most shit to say? It was ridiculous.  

What was even worse, was the fact that he was just a head at this point, he wasn’t even a full person with a body. You had no idea what the rest of him looked like and you hated the fact that you were just so god damn curious to find out. It was embarrassing- you were attracted to a literal talking head! 

Apparently though, the rest of the crew had said, sans Sanji since you both had joined Luffy’s crew at the same time, that this Buggy guy was bad news. Why exactly? You didn’t really know, but it had something to do with Buggy attempting to drown Luffy to obtain the map to the Grand Line and decimating a town a couple of weeks ago. 

But it looked like that warning of ‘Buggy is dangerous’ had turned into ‘Buggy is just annoying’ since all he was now, at this point in time, was just a talking head that never seemed to shut up. That talking head, however, was your crew’s only ticket to find a rogue Nami so you all had no choice but to put up with his antics. 

“Can’t you just tell us where Arlong is?” you asked the clown head offhandedly one morning out on deck as you sharpened your daggers. “Without, you know, all the theatrics?”  

“God,” Buggy groaned, rolling his eyes to the heavens. “Are you deaf or are you just stupid?” he asked exasperatedly as his head hopped around and turned to face you. “For the millionth time- I can’t just tell you where Arlong is. My powers don’t work like that. I’m not a compass or a map.” 

“Well, actually, you kind of are, aren’t you?” you asked curiously with an eyebrow raised, not put off by his rude tone. “I mean, think about it,” you started, pointing the tip of your dagger to look at him. “You could like, ‘leave’ a toe or something anywhere you wanted to remember a certain thing or place, and you could then just... sense where to go to get it back. Exactly like a map.” You were silent for a minute as you went back to sharpening the blade. “But I guess you already did that, right? Since that’s how you found Luffy at the Baratie?” you asked with a thoughtful hum. 

“Wow,” Buggy laughed condescendingly. “You’re a real sharpshooter, aren’t you? Thanks for that master analysis, captain obvious. What do you think I’m doing right now?” 

The corner of your mouth twitched upwards. “Acting like a map to get your body back,” you answered without hesitation and a twinge of smugness. “Maybe you should be called ‘Buggy the Map’ instead. It has a nice ring to it.” 

The clown’s patronizing smile dropped, his expression deadpanning. “Haha, very funny,” Buggy said in a humorless voice. “And here I thought you weren’t anything more than just a pretty face.” 

Your eyes darted to him, quickly scanning over his expression to see if he was seriously calling you pretty or if he was just joking. When you saw no hint of sincerity in his green eyes (wow they were pretty), you cleared your throat and refocused your attention back onto your blade.  

“Yeah, well, I’m full of surprises actually,” you said matter-of-factly without thinking, your mouth having a mind of its own. Your eyes widened slightly, your line of sight not budging from your dagger as your hand running along the blade stilled for a second.  

Were you flirting with Buggy?

Were you insane? 

Buggy’s attention was already wandering but at your choice of words, his eyes snapped right back to your face. For once in his life, he was at a loss for words. “Uh... ok?” He blinked. “Like what?” 

You felt your cheeks flush slightly, running your sharpening stone along the blade at a quicker pace. “Wouldn’t you like to know.” 

The clown furrowed his eyebrows, scrunching up his face in confusion as he looked at you. He felt like he had entered the Twilight zone or something.  

“Uh, yeah. You’re the one who brought it up, sweet cheeks,” he said as he watched you intently focus on your task at hand. Buggy then quirked an eyebrow as he added in snooty tone, “Well, whatever ‘surprise skills’ you have can’t possibly be knife sharpening because you’ve been working on that same blade all morning.” 

Shit. He was right, you realized. You had been out here longer than you initially thought and had been working on the same dagger ever since you sat down with him.  

In a quick attempt to hide your embarrassment at being called out, you swiftly sat up and stabbed the tip of your small blade into the wooden barrel next to where his head was. “Watch your mouth clown!” 

But Buggy didn’t even flinch. “Pfft, nice try sweetheart,” he scoffed. “But blades don’t scare me. I’m immune to cuts, remember? I’m literally just a head right now.” 

Crap. He got you. Again. You leaned back in your seat, pulling out your other blade to sharpen.  

“Oooo, another dagger, huh?” he asked with feigned interest, catching your gaze. “I guess you really are ‘full of surprises’,” he teased with an overly flirtatious tone and an exaggerated wink. 

At that, your face reddened. You knew he was just joking, but the combination of you admitting to yourself that you found him attractive coupled with his flirty teasing and that wink... it was causing your heart rate to accelerate like you had a schoolgirl crush.  

And crushing on Buggy? The talking clown head? It was just all too ridiculous. 

You resumed your blade sharpening ritual, trying to pretend like he wasn’t affecting you. “Well, I did tell you that, didn’t I?” you asked, trying to turn the tables back on him. 

Buggy was silent for a beat as his eyes regarded you. HIs voice dropped an octave lower, intentionally or not, you weren’t sure, as he said in a more earnest tone, “Yeah... but I didn’t think it was true.” 

Your eyebrows shot up at hearing his admission, his tone surprising you as you quickly turned your head towards him. When you saw the look in his eyes, the way that he was still staring at you, it caused your heart to skip a beat. It was like he was seeing you for the first time, really seeing you. 

‘Being more than a pretty face’ wasn’t something you took lightly; it was something you lived by. It had become your mantra of some sort. Your whole life, you were underestimated, rarely ever being taken seriously because you ‘had a pretty face’ that you could ‘coast by’ on. People (men) always assumed you were too dumb to understand things or be smart and have talents because you were pretty, and it absolutely infuriated you.  

You shook your head, clearing up those thoughts. You didn’t feel like delving into that right now and especially not with Buggy of all people, so instead of biting back, you said with a curt, humorless laugh as you went back to your blade, “There’s always more to people than meets the eye, you know.” 

Buggy let out a snort, his green eyes looking towards the sky for a second. “Yeah,” he agreed. “No kidding.” 

Both of you became quiet, a few beats of strangely comfortable silence passing between the two of you before you broke it. 

“But probably not with you though,” you joked. “You’re probably just all clown, complete with bad jokes and questionable make up. And,” you looked at him, a spark of mischief in your eyes, “you’re probably not even that tall.” 

You hoped to God that Buggy really did have a sense a humor and that your playful jabs didn’t go over his bandana cladded head because you really didn’t want to make an enemy out of him. And if he didn’t get your sense of humor, then you and him probably would never work out anyway.  

Your stomach fell to your feet at the thought. What were you even saying?? Jesus, you really were delusional. The quicker you guys found Arlong and split ways with Buggy, the better. 

But of course, the universe had different plans for you, because Buggy did in fact have a sense of humor and took your mockery of his height in stride. 

“What- not tall?? Please,” his voice becoming playfully haughty. “Just wait until you see my body, sweetheart. I’ll be looking down at you, telling you the best jokes you’ve ever heard in your life with some fresh clown make-up on,” he said, winking at you with a click of his tongue. “I call it ‘the Buggy trifecta.’” 

You looked away from him, hiding your flushed cheeks as you shook your head, a smile on your face as you opened your mouth to say something back when Sanji came up to the upper deck, a small smile on his face when he saw you and effectively cutting off your banter. 

“Ah, there you are y/n!” the blonde cook called out. “I’ve been looking for you. I didn’t realize you’d be out here on, uh,” his blue eyes darted to Buggy for a nanosecond before looking back at you, “clown duty.” 

Buggy scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Well, good morning to you too, happy feet.” 

Sanji glanced at Buggy again, furrowing his eyebrows for a second before shaking his head once with a blink and letting out a small sigh as he turned his attention back to you, deciding it wasn’t worth it to argue with the clown head. 

“Yeah, so, uh, anyway,” he said as he put his hands in his pockets. “Breakfast is ready,” he relayed, jabbing a thumb behind him. “I wanted to let you know before it got cold.” 

“Hey, what about my breakfast, blondie?” Buggy complained. “I might just be a head right now, but a clown’s gotta eat, you know?” When he saw the questionable stares from you and Sanji, Buggy shook his head. “Don’t ask me how it works,” he said before either of you could say anything. “But it just does. I still get hungry and need to eat.” He looked back up at Sanji, his green eyes expectant. “So how about whipping me up some scrambled eggs, huh?” 

Sanji blinked. “Oh, well, sure-” 

“I got it, Sanji,” you said, cutting off your lifelong friend. You stood up from your seat, sheathing your daggers back into their holsters on your hips. “I’ll make you some eggs Buggy.” 

“Ooo, look at that,” Buggy laughed. “You really are full of surprises, aren’t you?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows. 

Ignoring the questioning look Sanji was giving you, you walked past the two men, well, man and talking head, and started going down the stairs. “Here’s another surprise: I’ll cook you your eggs once I’m done eating, in like an hour. How does that sound?” 

“Whoa, wait, wait, wait! I didn’t mean it like that, y/n!” Buggy quickly backtracked, trying his best to smooth things over with you as fast as he could. “I meant that as like, a good surprise! Really!” 

You smirked to yourself, finding it funny how quickly Buggy switched up his mannerisms in order to get what he wanted. “Sanji, you’re on clown duty!” You called out, tunning Buggy out, leaving him begging and pleading with a confused Sanji, who was wondering what the heck he just witnessed between you two. 

[utilitycaster]

Hi there, I saw in one of your tags recently that "if you think the raven queen was being unfair, I'm not really interested in your opinions." I was wondering if you could talk a little more about that because I'll be honest, Vax isn't my favorite character but I've seen all of C1 and I really don't get why some people HATE the RQ, call her unfair, manipulative and pretty plainly say this moon conflict is mostly her fault because she took Vax and through a Domino effect Ludinus is releasing Predathos. Also, I enjoy your theories and analysis for CR so much you got me listening to Midst, so thank you.

Hi anon,

Great question! This is going to be a very long post, with a relatively short initial answer, because there is both the literal misinterpretation that indicates this is not someone with strong analytical skills nor knowledge of canon, and a number of potential mindsets that lead to this manner of thinking in the first place, none of which I respect. You happen to have sort of hit upon the foundational elements of my whole deal re: CR meta, so, buckle in.

The first part is simple: Vex died because Percy triggered a trap before she'd been healed up. We've seen this sort of trap elsewhere in non-divine contexts (Folding Halls of Halas); it's just a form of trap. A particularly nasty one, but this is for a very powerful relic she doesn't want falling into the wrong hands, and, moreover, the party could have likely disabled it either through rogue skills or magic had Percy waited. Vax, then, as the third part of the resurrection ritual, told the Raven Queen to take him instead of Vex. The Raven Queen did precisely as he asked. He did not need to offer this (Scanlan was going to make an offering, the other parts of the ritual had gone well, it was Vex's first death so the DC was low, and Vax could have made any number of other, less dramatic offers), and he did so with the understanding that he would die in lieu of Vex, right then and there. He did not. I think that's the only case, actually, where the Raven Queen was not 100% upfront with her intentions before Vax accepted something; but he offered it voluntarily. Vax was a person who formed extremely intense connections, to the point where it was perhaps unhealthy, and did not believe life without his sister was worth living, and was willing to sacrifice himself to a god.

Everything after that was extremely straightforward. Vax communed with the Raven Queen, who spoke very directly with him in his vision in the Raven's Crest. She was extremely clear when she met with him following his disintegration: he was given the option to refuse her offer, and he took it instead. It is not manipulative to give someone a difficult decision, and if a character you like makes a choice you don't like, it is not automatically the result of manipulation.

As for the moon conflict being her fault…that is, to put it bluntly, unhinged, and what's more, ironic given that that's the manipulative argument. Ludinus tried to commune with Ruidus using a random crystalline artifact beneath Molaesmyr, centuries before Vax was born. He was going to do this regardless. If he couldn't get Vax, he'd get some other sliver of divinity, and what's more, it's been all but stated that Vax is not actually supposed to be leaving the Shadowfell to protect Keyleth, and is disobeying the Raven Queen directly (and it's been stated that this isn't necessarily helpful for Keyleth, who is trying to grieve and move on). So: Vax made his choices with the knowledge of what they entailed, is trying to bend if not break the conditions to which he agreed with full knowledge in a way that probably isn't healthy for him or Keyleth, and it's bananas to be like "wow look at how the Raven Queen made Ludinus try to free Predathos." Like. Even if she had tricked Vax, which she didn't, Ludinus literally could have just kept on his racist imperialistic longevitymaxxing beat indefinitely and left the moon well enough alone. The domino meme is a meme. I mean, while we're at it, couldn't we trace it back to Vecna instead, for killing Vax with Disintegrate in the first place, since had he not done so, Vax would have either survived that fight or would have been resurrected normally? Or perhaps it's Percy for triggering that trap. Or the Chroma Conclave for being the reason why Vox Machina was seeking the Deathwalker's Ward in the first place…but that only happened because Allura and Kima didn't kill Thordak but rather sealed him, and because a priestess of Melora cursed Raishan so that she had reason to ally with Thordak. We can go on indefinitely; the point is, to assign blame specifically to the Raven Queen when Ludinus literally did not have to do a goddamn thing with the moon is a fucking stupid take.

Below the cut, I talk root causes behind why people might decide the Raven Queen was unfair and come up with the above nonsensical argument to support that, since I don't think people say stupid things just to be stupid.

I think one root cause for this mentality of this is that the person in question wishes Vax hadn't died and is looking for someone to blame because they don't want to blame Matt Mercer and Liam O'Brien, even though yeah, that's who to blame. The thing is, as we learned in Campaign 2, character death is quite literally on the table. Had Vax not made his bargain, either in episode 1x103 or his original one during Vex's resurrection? He might have simply remained dead. Had he not given his life for Vex's, he was pursuing paladin anyway with the Everlight, and we don't know what she'd have required of him. But more importantly, for all people like to bring up a PC-centric perspective (which, in Actual Play, is inevitable) Vox Machina's frequent use of resurrection spells was in fact a massive privilege most people in Exandria do not have. And, unsurprisingly for a table whose DM made up rules specifically to make resurrection more difficult, the Critical Role cast is open to a story where death exists. I do not think it's an accident that resurrection has been made even harder in the subsequent campaigns. I also happen to think that Campaign 1 is a far richer and better story with Vax's death, given the other events that occurred. Had Vax not been the sort of person who would offer his life for a god to take in exchange for his sister? Sure, he'd possibly have lived to the end. But he was, and that's the character those people who wish he were still alive loved. If he wasn't that person, they wouldn't have liked him in the same way.

D&D is fundamentally about exceptional characters becoming more powerful, and will be focused on those characters. I do not think D&D supports a story about characters who reject all power. They can give up political power (the Mighty Nein, for the most part, do this - certainly more so than Vox Machina, and Bells Hells is yet to be seen) but they will progress in levels, which is power. Even if unwanted, it is power, because most people in the world are commoners with 5 HP and 10 in all their stats. With that said, a lot of people desperately want a subversion of this power narrative. Vax is, I think, the closest we get. In D&D you are not going to get a player character who finishes a campaign and remains Just Some Guy. But you can have someone like Vax, who doesn't have any interest in power (compare to Vex, who very much is about power and who gets a much happier ending) who nonetheless ends up on the Tal'Dorei Council and the favored of a god…and yet, in the end, his equally powerful friends still can do nothing to save him. I think a Power Bad story is overly simplistic, but "there are limits to power, and ultimately none of us have complete control" is not. I think Vax's death gives the story of Vox Machina a finality and heft that it would lack otherwise.

A second possible cause is the "What if the gods are BAD" argument. I'm going to be totally honest: I did not see this in the fandom until Campaign 3, and honestly, not until EXU Calamity in any widespread sense, which does lead me to believe that most people did not come up with it as a reasonable idea on their own until characters started saying it, because it is so plainly in conflict with the themes of Campaigns 1 and 2 that to make this argument would be obvious projection. Do I think a nuanced view of the gods as flawed beings, rather than perfection, is warranted? Absolutely. Mortals, too, are flawed, and we don't kill them all for it. I think Vax's story makes them uncomfortable because it makes it clear divine favor is not, as Ludinus Da'leth tries to argue, the gods just bestowing and withholding their gifts arbitrarily, but rather that divine favor comes with a divine responsibility as well. Clerics and paladins do not study the way wizards do; but they must live lives in service, whereas a wizard can shut the book at the end of the day and do whatever. Clerics and paladins have powers that can be taken away; a wizard does not. That's the fundamental concept behind the Age of Arcanum - wizards trying to get around the fundamental rules of this world! Vax's paladin powers came at a price. His options are guided, but also limited, by the oath he took. He is far more fettered than a wizard, in the end, and I think that fucks with the narrative of the gods cruelly withholding their gifts from all but a select few, so they instead make their gifts into manipulative punishments…while still, contradictorily, arguing that characters such as Laudna or Ashton or Imogen were denied the mercy of the gods. Now, setting aside the obvious, that these characters have their backstories because Marisha and Taliesin and Laura decided they would because this is a story, and one in which someone had a perfect life would be boring and so the gods didn't intervene with Laudna because Marisha Ray wanted to play a Sun Tree corpse (see next section), it really is fascinating to see how people who hate the Raven Queen so neatly align with Ludinus. It's fine for sorcerers to have inborn powers, apparently, and Ludinus actually has himself tried to ape druidic magic; it's not about power, it's just about that power source. Honestly, they're not even above the gods as a power source - Ludinus used the crystal beneath Molaesmyr seemingly unaware if it were of the Archheart, and he's demonstrably using Vax, and everyone loves a resurrection from the gods, but heaven forbid you pay someone for the work you feel yourself entitled to. (Entitlement: this will also be a theme throughout the rant portion of this post.)

As a brief subsection to this: the idea that bad things happen to good people because the other side of that coin is free will is an ancient theological and philosophical discussion, and one we are obviously not going to solve here, though it is a little depressing I have had multiple rewarding conversations on this topic, thanks to an academically rigorous religious education, starting from the tender age of 9, and a lot of adults on Tumblr seemingly can't engage on the level of my third-grade classmates. I think, however, it tells a truth that fits in well with the wizard (and entitled fan) desire to control everything. People are terrified of random forces. Cancer, for example, is a matter of probability. There are things that can increase your chances of developing cancer, to be sure, but the simile I used when I was taught about radiation-induced cancers was that of lottery tickets: if you buy more, you have a better chance; but sometimes someone who bought a single ticket "wins" and someone who bought a ticket weekly never does. By believing the gods of Exandria are on trial for not intervening with every little hardship or for not taking Vax precisely as he intended, they reveal a profound terror of random chance and of the free will of people who are not them. Which is very funny when you consider we're watching Actual Play, where random chance is a deliberately induced element. I think the takeaway of all of this is "I think some of you guys are really mad this is a D&D game." But let's continue.

The third, and honestly most likely cause, is honestly sort of a continuation of the first but not centered around Vax so much as just a general, in my opinion deeply childish discomfort of any sort of tragedy or unhappiness in fiction. I've noticed this a lot lately, and I am not a cultural critic and don't have a high enough level view to pretend to be one, but as others have noted a lot of people seem affronted when whatever show they are currently watching does not meet their specific standards of "comfort media" or "hopepunk." It's a self-infantilization I don't care for, and it's certainly not limited to the CR fandom (see: any grown-ass adult passionately defending a choice to only watch children's cartoons and only read YA) or even fandom at all (see: the baffling popularity of the Mr. Rogers "look for the helpers" line which was intended for anxious young children, not for adults who can and should be the helpers). It really came into focus for me with CR when people referred to both EXU Calamity and to Candela Obscura's Circle of Needle and Thread as specifically "hopeless." They are, to me, deeply hopeful series. They are sad, and tragic, and many characters do not get a happy ending, but they are ultimately about how some people will endure, and will live on and find meaning after great loss. Calamity explicitly states that because of the actions of the heroes, while devastation will occur, total annihilation is mitigated. It's like the adage of how courage only means something in the face of fear; hope only means something in the face of darkness. Happy and fluffy tales are not hopeful; they are merely not things that require you to have hope. The root word of catharsis is that of cleansing and purgation and it originally related to physical excretion - cathartic stories are about getting those complicated and ugly emotions and fears out and feeling better for it by briefly feeling, perhaps, worse! Now, again, this has worsened with Vax's story with time. Shortly after Campaign 1, it was very common to see stories where Vex or Keyleth were utterly distraught, indefinitely, but those at least were engaging with grief, even if in a very shallow and unproductive way. But this has morphed into this idea that the fact that a work of fiction might make you even feel sadness makes it bad, and wrong, and hopeless, and the machinations of a cruel and heartless god. Which brings me back to the entitlement narrative: it's really as simple as "the story didn't give me what I wanted (whether that was a happy ending for Vax, or for Keyleth, or just a lack of sadness generally, or a narrative about the gods that validates my personal beliefs, or a way to justify Ludinus's actions), so it is bad." Which again is about being in control of the narrative, which again, in D&D, is simply not something anyone can claim. Why are these people here watching a D&D game? I don't know.

So that's really it: on a basic level, if you think the Raven Queen is unfair, you are profoundly ignorant of canon, so I'm already going to have to fact check anything you cite (if you cite at all), but there's a much deeper refusal to meet stories where they are and expand one's own comfort zone at play, and that means any analysis will never consider the possibility that your pre-existing beliefs were wrong (absolutely crucial in meta). You will always play it too safe and be uninspired and reactionary because the alternative is uncertainty and fear. I think a refusal to embrace tragedy in fiction is itself a profound tragedy; that is someone who is terrified to believe that life goes on.

[dvasva]

Tbh? I think the radiant emperor duology deserves more critique than it gets in its tag, so after stewing it over for a couple weeks and also discussing it with my friend, I have decided to do it myself.

So. Spoilers for She Who Became the Sun and He Who Drowned The World ahead.

First off, so nobody accuses me of hating the series, I liked the series. I'd say I'd give the first book a 4.5/5, I thoroughly enjoyed it, and I like both books. I truthfully skipped the fisting scene, it triggered some dysphoria that I wasn't comfortable with personally but I don't have problem with it existing in the book, it's good where it is, no changes.

No, my critiques come mostly from the second book, hwdts. Which sucks because I absolutely loved Baoxiang in it, it's a well known fact that my ideal type is pretty, really mean, characters. ('What about Madam Zhang?!!!???!? Shes mean and pretty!!' I hear you ask. Give it a second cause i will get to my beloved madam zhang) So, my critiques are mostly organized as 'The first part I didn't like in Hwdtw that signals the thing that became my biggest issue, the bits in the middle that i did like along with the bits that I felt didn't really work well, and Act 3 which is where my issues really were exacerbated.'

By the end of book one, I had a general annoyance but acceptance that Ma Xiuying was a bit of a weak character, and not weak as in 'dang shes a woman and cant fight' or any other sexist way you may interpret that, but weak as in structurally, she didn't really have as much depth as other characters. I thought she didn't have as much time put into her character as others. And yeah you could have a million character analysis essays over Ma and her place in the story and etc, but for me, her setup for the next book as potentially having conflict with Zhu or her own morals was the most interesting part of Ma. In general I think a lot of people tend to overlook this flaw partly because Ma is a cis lesbian character and the main 'love interest' in a book that is usually marketed to people as sapphic, which yeah there is certainly a sapphic relationship in the book but I think saying it's a major part of the book is really giving the relationship a load bearing wall ot isn't strong enough to carry. The Radiant Emperor Duology is not a romance, first and foremost. To describe it as a wlw romance is gonna leave people who read ot specifically for that reason kinda dissappointed by the end of book 2.

My big critiques didn't start until book two, and a particular scene, though. Ma, at the start of book two, was generally filling the niche of 'nagging wife' to zhu, which yknow, is a fine place to start from. I was a little disappointed there was no further discussion of Ma's disapproval of the morality of Zhu's actions, and in fact the dead child was pretty much entirely forgotten by Ma in favor of being Zhu's wife. Which, yknow, sure.

The Scene I had issue with happened (Spoilers once again) after Zhu finally captures Ouyang and imprisons him at her base of operations. Ma, dressed in her empressly regalia enters his room with the intention of being the bigger person. She walks in, looks at the stripped down and humiliated general who killed her father and famously is also really a women hater, and tells him she forgives him for killing her father. And then she gets upset and cries when the prideful general who hates women gives her a dressing down and taunts her and is like 'I'm glad I killed your father'? She nearly cries because Ouyang was mean to her (notably only cause he was mean to her and didn't gracefully accept her forgiveness, not because he killed ehr father) and runs off to Zhu. And Zhu responds with 'Wow, he's just a weirdo, everyone likes you and everyone in existance immediately knows you're a good person and you change people.' Which, my friend suggested before she finished the book, was a case of Zhu placating Ma and dismissing her feelings which would be an interesting dynamic.

Really my hangups with this scene come from multiple parts.

1. Ma' few character traits including being observant and reading people really well (a thing she's praised for in book 1) and having good social intuition are completely thrown out by her thinking being alone with ouyang and forgiving him would be a good idea and then her being shocked and upset when he spat on her forgiveness. And

2. Zhu's response is never once treated by the text as her dismissing Ma and placating her, and Zhu's statement despite never being shown to be true before and that moment being the first time it's ever mentioned, ends up becoming Chekov's moral purity by the end of the book, where the plot hinges on Ma being able to magically heal a damaged character's mind enough for Zhu to win in the end. Which I will get back to. There's a lot of other stuff happening between here and the end.

So, before I get back to Ma and her role in the story, I'll address some other bits from after this scene. Both problems and things I enjoyed generally.

Madam Zhang and her parallels to Baoxiang and her being the absolute queen of dissociating really was interesting (before act 3). She was a very compelling character who I completely understood and felt positively about. She had a way more interesting relationship with gender imo than Ma did, especially in book 2. I didn't really like that she was overwhelmingly shown having sexual villence done to her, that felt weirdly like a punishment. But, I did like her a whole bunch, and I liked the look we got into her head. She was probably my second, maybe third, favorite character in the whole book until Act 3.

I really, really liked Ouyangs dynamic and relationship with Zhu. The weird sexual tension between them, their weird kinda nonsexual but also kinda very sexual S&M relationship. It was somehow the most sensual, sexual part of a book that featured Madam Zhang having sex with multiple people, and Zhu going down on Ma, and a lot of other mentions of sex or scenes involving sex. Tbh I feel like, in a way, Ma was left to the sidelines for most of the book because Ouyang became the primary 'love' interest for a hot second there and the only reason Ma could get her spot back was Ouyang and Zbu's separation. Also, from what I've seen when people talk about this book, they always kinda try to express Zhu and Ouyang's dynamic as very nonsexual and nonromantic, as platonic mostly. And there is no inherent superiority of romantic over platonic, but I think to insist that it is only platonic, and not a strange swirl of romantic, platonic, sexual, frustration and relief, and a swirl of familiarity and vulnerability all wrapped into one, is doing the dynamic a bit of a disservice. And ther is, imo, very clearly a subtle hint of romantic intent and interest on Ouyang's part before he realizes Zhu has a body he hates.

Which is also another point I didn't like. Ouyang and Zhu's relationship end felt off. The entire bit with the pirates felt off, but especially how Ouyang found out about Zbu's body, and how Zhu reacted. I think Ouyang finding out second hand, from a combination of being suspicious and from Jiang saying it, was a poor way for that to be revealed. I think there was a better way for that to happen that woyld have felt more like a betrayl to zhu than this did. The fact that Zhu and Ouyang were so in tune and could see each other perfectly, but this one thing was a blind spot for both of them because of how unaffected by gender Zhu was compared to how overaffected by gender Ouyang was is a really interesting thing to explore, an interesting disconnect between two character's whose entire basis for their relationship is 'like recognizes like'. I think Zhu seeing it as a betrayl would have been more impactful if she had presented this informatuon to Ouyang herself and been rejected than how it went down. And, I think her not realizing Ouyang would be disgusted that he felt connected and felt a sameness to someone with a body he found grotesque and that he feared would have been more interesting for zhu, who views herself outside of womanhood and didnt really think that other people would not see her outside of womanhood, if she was the one who told ouyang herself.

Also, less importantly, think going into Ouyangs annoyance that zhu kept moving his target further away was a good move but it wasn't expanded on as much for my taste. I also really liked it when (spoiler) Xu Da dies, and that entire part despite some minir bits, was extremely good in that Zhu finally has tasted loss. She had, up until that point, been riding a wave of positivity, she was the underdog who won over and over again despite all the odds and despite her own reckless choices. So I did appreciate that everything went wrong for her at least once. that would have been, imo if other things were changed, a good place to end a book two in a three book series. Which will make sense as to why I mention it im a bit.

I also didn't like how Ma was nonexistant unless the plot was like 'ok we need to remind people that Ma exists.'

And there's of course other stuff but those are the main points of acts 1 and 2 that i wasn't fond of or that i liked.

Act 3 is a wholely different behemoth which can be encapsulated with 'I wish it was longer but also different' (courtesy of the convo my friend and I had).

My friend and I both agreed that we liked this kind of courtly drama game it was playing. My friend doesn't tend to like the structure or writing style of a lot of the chinese wuxia, danmei, or courtly drama translated books i read, so it was nice to know that the genre content isn't the issue for her there.

The biggest problems I had with the ending though was 1. I think Baoxiang and Ma had an interesting dynamic despite it being really rushed and how distasteful I found the entire concept of Ma being such a good wholesome goody good good person that she could change Baoxiang, quiet his demons and fix him in some way. That was annoying in an otherwise interesting dynamic. And 2. I think Madam Zhang's character traits and cleverness and all that were wiped away to make her inexplicably jealous of Ma in a way that I don't think fit her character and just served to fit a trope of jealous empress who hates the favored concubine.

So, here's my major proposed changes.

1. Ma gets sent to Khanbaliq extremely early on. Like, act one maybe after ouyang is captured early. This serves three purposes. A. Ma has something to do and is more present in the story. this could be a good xhance to let her actually feel frustrated or upset at Zhu in some tangible way that needs to be resolved or talked thru eventually. B. she gets more time to build a relationship with Baoxiang, whose entire defeat hinges on him having a strong connection with her. and C. Her absence in the other parts of the book feel less like she's being ignored or forgotten. It makes Zhu's lack of haste more than just a way to annoy Ouyang, and turns it into an interesting moral choice. Should she rush to Khanbaliq to save Ma or trust that Ma will be ok in favor of gaining power? Her lack of haste means Ouyang leaves, depressed, and she loses Xu Da, all while she doesn't even have the assurance that Ma is ok, she is truly at her lowest point with nobody with her. If Ma is in Khanbaliq and that's explored, then Zhu and Ouyang can also explore their dynamic without Ma feeling a bit like she is battling for Zhu's attention.

2. Madam Zhang is suspicious of Ma, or feels actually tangibly threatened by Ma. In act 3, Madam Zhang's anger towards Ma feels really out of place. She got exactly what she wants, she is empress, her emperor isn't interested in removing her from her position and her position isn't threatened by anyone. Baoxiang won't get rid of her, he won't demote her, he has shown zero sign of ever even considering it. So, why is Madam Zhang jealous of Ma? Imo, especially since she very clearly has dissociated into oblivion and has no love or affection for anyone anymore, and no real desire or motivation to secure her position further aside from maybe producing an heir to make sure shes taken care of after Baoxiang dies, there's no reason for her to be inextricably jealous of Ma. It kinda just erases all of Madam Zhang's political savvy and cunning into jealous, petty woman, and that sucks. If she was suspicious of Ma's intention, or Baoxiang genuinely expressed spmething that actively threatened her position, her hatred of Ma would make sense, but instead she hates Ma cause Ma is ugly and spends every night with Baoxiang. She hated rice buckets concubine cause that concubine used a lot of funds and competition genuinely made her position less stable. She needs better motivation for hating Ma.

3. As I mentioned earlier, Zhu needs to be the one to tell Ouyang that she does not have a dick. That's just all around better, it feels more like a betrayl to bare your secrets and be rejected, etc etc.

4. The duology should have been a trilogy, with book 3 starting when Zhu is at her lowest, ouyang is dead, ma is in khanbaliq, Xu Da is dead, a new guy is the emperor. This is where a book three should have started. in a series that has so many important characters, i feel like it needs more space. she's in a 10 gallon tank when really she needs a 30 gallon tank. Lots of it, especially towards the end of book 2, felt rushed and the extra book will absolutely push that back a bit and make it less rushed.

Anyways that's my critique of The Radiant emperor duology. Once Again, I liked the series, its one of my favorites i've read all year. I don't dislike it, and having a critique or opinion about something doesnt mean I didn't like the book or understand the book (because obviously if i understood it i would understand why its flawless). I liked it, there are things I wish were different, that's it.

[puella-1n-somn10]

🕊️Puella Magi Madoka Magica x Team Fortress 2: Medic and his Witch Form🕊️

word count w/o intro text: 10,651

(Over...two...months...of writing; thank FUCK I've managed to get this all down right on time for Halloween!)

This has been a long time consideration, and, according to one of my last few polls, ya'll really wanted to see how I would interpret Medic's witch form! Well, after a long-time wait, here's the rundown of how Medic's witch would look like in my mind!

Before we start, I highly recommend that you look at the list of trigger warnings present in the tags; the Team Fortress 2 universe, both in-game and outside of it, is no stranger to gruesome elements, so I strongly urge you to take a long look at them before proceeding. If any of the mentioned makes you uncomfortable in whatever form, look away now for the sake of your own health.

As expected, spoilers for Madoka Magica, Kazumi Magica, Tart Magica, Magia Record (especially the anime), and the Team Fortress 2 comics ahead! We are going to talk about one of the many stingers of the Puella Magi universe, after all! On top of that, there will be mentions of Heavy x Medic x Engineer, so if the ship doesn't sit right with you, I must sincerely apologize in advance; it is recommended to click away from this post if said ship is not your cup of tea at all.

With all that being said, let us begin with this mess of an analysis/ficlet post!

-The Wish, Possible Powers, and Soul Gem-

"Oh ho hoh! I have been in zhe wrong profession. I must learn zhis magic!"

Let's be blunt here for a second- he's already laid waste to whatever concept of "morals" present within the human consciousness that would prevent him from furthering his medical and experimental endeavors, and he's done so much without the use of an incubator's powers; from granting his teammates invincibility to bringing them back from the clutches of death. Ludwig's immoral, sickened mind, coupled with his medical skills and treatment of the human body as an art canvas, has allowed him to play God.

On the other hand, though he did align himself with the opposing Classic team for some time within the comics, he explained to the newly-resurrected Sniper that it was purely for financial reasons, and that he never harbored any ill-will towards his teammates. In fact, it would be safe for us to assume that he, in his mind, genuinely cares for his team, and made it one of his missions to turn them into unstoppable killing machines- into gods. He cherishes his fellow mercenaries...albeit in his own twisted, inhumane, and silly way.

Building upon the above, it is also clear that Ludwig is a responsible pet owner and genuinely cares for his doves, especially Archimedes. Yes, he does resort to using animal organs - especially the exotic kind - when fit in order to further his experiments and enhance his teammates' performances, but the contrast between that and his care for the birds is kind of a testament to how he treat other humans - especially the classic team - vs. how he treats the mercs and others close to him. For goodness' sake, he's put Classic Heavy's demands on a back burner and allowed Sniper to escape while he was too busy reviving Archimedes! Ludwig does have a heart and the capacity to care, but not much in terms of morals, if at all.

Wow, he would definitely get along with Alina Gray, huh?

So, right off the bat, it wouldn't be farfetched for Medic to be curious over Kyubey's wish-granting skills; he did make a deal with the Devil himself on two separate occasions within the official Team Fortress 2 comics (though the initial deal's conditions is still unknown to us), after all. How he came to figuring out the existence of the incubators is anyone's guess at this point due to his unpredictable nature, but, in my opinion, it can range from old folklore surrounding the species or simply finding out that one of the mercs had already contracted (my personal bets are either Heavy or Solly). I recommend going off the walls with this one; for all we know, he could have managed to detect spikes in magical activity around the base/island and forced himself into the world of Magi, Witches, and wishes- all the while a certain little bipedal fiend began to showcase an equal amount of interest in him for reasons we are going to dive into soon.

On to the main topic of his wish, it's quite simple, really; it would be related to his hunger for power/knowledge and furthering his research/scientific endeavors; promptly dissipating whatever is limiting his experimental pursuits (maybe even financial, as presented to us in the comics).

Another possible wish that he could have made might be rooted to the bonds he had formed with the mercenaries and the surprisingly deep respect he had shown to each one them on numerous occasions. Such fascination towards his teammates is even presented to us within the beta version of Meet the Medic, where he made his goal of enhancing them and turning them into beings akin to the divine as clear as daylight. I won't deny the fact that this man just keep on finding out new ways to break both the Hypocratic Oath and Geneva Conventions with each passing minute - and it's usually for his own amusement -, but he also seeks to sculpt each mercenary into the best versions of themselves not just as a testament to his own prowess, but also because of his fascination towards them; he just likes those goobers around him and sees the mercs as his fellow pals.

With all that being said, I personally don't believe that whatever power he gained as a result of these wishes would be on a similar caliber as his canonical healing skills; after all, even without Kyubey's interference, he has shown to be exceptionally skilled in his craft to the extent that he had deemed himself to be a god on multiple occasions- and none of them were without reason. Instead, I believe that the core theme of his new magical powers relate to limits- whatever barriers that prevented him from unlocking his and the rest's full potential, and fully dissipating them. Perhaps he can manifest organs, transfer them at high speeds, all the while making his surgeries a little easier for himself. The option of him being able to create little animated "familiars" of his own from the remains of both ally and enemy alike is also there. If you guys have better ideas, please don't hesitate to share; I'll have to admit that this coming up with wish-related powers is a personal weak point of mine, and I will be accepting any and all criticisms coming my way.

Finally, to close this section and move on to the next, I would also like to discuss the matter surrounding his soul gem, and how I would personally interpret it. I am unsure if what I am going to say next has been backed up by canon or not, but a nice detail that I have noticed whilst looking into the soul gems present in canon is that they often correspond with the eye colors of their respective magi; which brings to mind the idea of eyes being the windows to a person's soul. Even if it's not a mandatory rule for when it comes to designing a Magi (especially when we take Nagisa Momoe into account), we can still see this metaphor being at play on numerous occasions throughout the Madoka canons, and where else is it more evident than within Kazumi Magica and the Magia Record anime?

Putting it briefly, aside from just looking at their soul gem, another indicator of a magi's slip into witchhood is by looking into their eyes during their final moments; Michiru Kazusa's sclera turned completely dark as her pupils began to shift into scribbles, and Kuroe - poor, sweet Kuroe - had the same corruption her soul gem was undergoing being displayed from within, you guessed it, her eyes.

So, while I do believe that red could be a nice color for Ludwig's soul gem, as it would also correspond with him being on the RED team - as presented to us on the cover of Fight Songs -, I can also see that a striking blue could also fit our crazy bastard.

As for the emblems present on his soul gem's egg form and its shape upon transformation, I'm gonna be honest; this is gonna be a little more complex than the color part - especially with the soul gems of Tart Magica and Magia Record in mind -, but I will do my best to summarize it to the best of my abilities-

To make this easier for my sanity's sake, the red cross he is already associated with in-game will be present as the emblem on top of his soul gem, though the the one on the middle would probably be based on either his bonesaw, the Ubercharge, a realistic heart (as a tie-in to how the Ubercharge works), or his doves instead. The actual shape his soul gem take on upon transformation, on the other hand, would resemble a large, anatomical heart placed on the center of his chest - connected to the rest of it and his shoulders through glass arteries and veins - due to its sheer size; usually, a magi's soul gem is only large enough to fit within the palm of their hands, while Medic's could be as huge as his curled-up fist or even an ostrich's egg.

The cause behind this peculiarity will be thoroughly explained soon enough, but, for now, let us close this chapter up and move on to the next...

-Descent Into Despair-

Before we kick off this angst fest and start hypothesizing, we're gonna need to take a good look at the nature of the soul and how this ties into the existing similarities shared between Kyubey and Ludwig- yes, this will get wild, especially if you're in only one of those fandoms from the outside looking in, so it's best for you to buckle up, hon, 'cause we in for a fucking joyride.

According to multiple religious and philosophical texts, the soul is a vital, non-physical part of a human being; it is an individual's very core of existence. The soul isn't exactly abstract, per se, as it's believed to actually exist between the lines of this plane of reality and that of the intangible world, and that each person has a unique soul that is distinctly theirs; it is, by definition, metaphysical- that person is the soul, as much as the soul is them.

Despite the limitations placed upon us by the very nature of the soul, it can be treated as a tangible and even physical object within both the TF2 and PMMM canons; in the latter case, Kyubey was able to turn them into magical gems for the sake of both efficiency and "incubation" - the goal of turning his victims into despair-riddled witches that spread the very misery they are drowning in -, all the while, in the Team Fortress universe, they are treated as nothing more than organs that can be removed and then reapplied at will by the very hands of, you guessed it, our very own Ludwig Humboldt for the dual purpose of conning the Devil out of the ownership of his soul and, in turn, extending his own life span.

This brings us back to the very moment where Ludwig made his wish with Kyubey; as presented to us via both Sayaka Miki and Homura Akemi, the process of making a wish and establishing a contract with Kyubey is proven to be quite the painful procedure, as they were able to feel their souls being pulled right out of their bodies by Kyubey in order to remold the very cores of their whole existence into these magical jewels known as Soul Gems; shining with the wishes that bind them to the life of a Magi until they inevitably reach their grisly ends.

Medic, of all people, would absolutely be the first to know exactly how painful it would be to have one's soul be forcefully ripped out of one's own body; he had already done so to 8 other people before grafting the extracted essences into himself. As result of this forced amalgamation, the size of his soul gem would be, as already stated, much larger than average. As for Medic himself and his reaction to his accumulated souls being turned into this grand artifact of magical potential, he would be in a state of shock, awe, and perhaps even a tinge of conflict - from the pain alone, he knew that his souls were tampered with; extracted and reforged -, but they were miniscule when compared to the wave of amazement that washed over him as he held the newly formed symbol of his status as a magi in his hands, shining a brilliant red with the wish he made with the white devil before him.

If Medic had to be honest, he would say, without a shadow of a doubt, that the incubators sure knew what they were doing; despite the tinge of bitterness regarding his souls being torn out of him, it was undeniable that having his life essences be turned into an all-powerful jewel was rather efficient, especially when stranded within the chaotic, unforgiving battlefield. Besides, this deal not only granted him what he desired most in life, but it unlocked a whole new world for him to explore; the realm of the witches.

After his first witch hunt went off without a hitch, he looked at his soul gem...yes, it had dimmed a little, and, according to his newly-formed, four-legged acquaintance, its brightness reflected what magic he had left; the very power he had gained from their infernal deal. This knowledge, combined with the grief seed taking in the impurities he had accumulated, had sparked inspiration within him, and, inevitably, that little glimmer turned into a raging, uncontrollable wildfire.

As his lips curled into that deranged smile of his, he arrived to the conclusion that he needed to research both his soul gem and these otherworldly monsters. Oh, was he was ever-so excited; a whole new world of possibilities had unveiled before him! He knew he had to learn more about these witches, for they were prime candidates for new observations and experiments...

Besides, if things were to go awry, he would have his backup plans as safeguards. He looked at the large jewel on his desk, its light reflecting on his glasses, with a look of complete confidence- after all, he was Ludwig Humboldt, the RED team's medic; he had already played the classic team like the money-hungry fools they were, defied all known laws of life, death, and nature on the regular, and bested the Devil in his own game! What bases of morality and human decency were little more than etches on the wall to him, and he was willing to go above and beyond to ensure his own and the rest's survival.

He cackled; oh, there was no need for any worries, my friend! Whatever that may come to pass, he shall find a workaround. So, with his lips curling into that toothy smile of his, he went to work-

Just like clockwork, it didn't take long for his signature obsession to dig its talons; day by day, he would salvage what parts of these unfathomable creatures and bring them back to his infirmary- even going as far as to capture their familiars and the smaller witches to bring back. After all, killing these wicked creatures outright would just cause them and their barriers to fade away, so he had to think of workarounds in order to harvest as much useful parts of them as he could.

All that, and that is without even getting into the details of the bargain he had made with the little pale ferret- why, that rascal Kyubey could be considered a new good friend of his in his eyes! He had even experimented on the bipedal fiend, and the Incubator held no grudge towards the quack doctor (hence how he came into the knowledge of his entire species and the fact that they were a hivemind). Back on topic- yes, the contract in itself was agonizing, there was no denying that, but at least he had gained a myriad of benefits from their mutual agreement.

Yet, as the saying goes, the higher they soar, the harder they fall.

Within every enforced law and in every deal made, loopholes were an inevitability- Ludwig and Kyubey knew that all too well as the roles of the recipient and contractor respectively. Time and curiosity have worked hand-in-hand in order to nurture their individual experiences and wisdom surrounding this unwritten rule of the universe. As several blazing days turned into howling nights, Ludwig's intrigue towards the limitations set before him as both a mercenary and a Puer Magi grew; his souls being turned into a singular, portable trinket was effective, yes, especially with the magic he had gained and his more than impressive healing abilities making both jobs a lot more easier, but, of course, so much could go wrong in the long run-

Ah, and these witches- at this stage, he had accomplished what many had deemed to be either impossible or far too risky; lining up the walls of his laboratory, amongst the butchered appendages and organs of their kin, were the captured forms of smaller witches and familiars- some were still struggling to be set free, while the others have resigned themselves to their fates. Whenever Ludwig wasn't on either battlefields or experimenting on his teammates, he would be slicing and chopping these poor souls away- trying to see how they functioned, or even analyzing their individual reactions to his little tests. Each of these curse-driven monstrosities' very existence brought forth a cluster of enigmas that only Ludwig could unravel, and the answer to these riddles must be tied to the very core of these beings- whether we're talking about how they would function as a living organism...or their grief seeds.

Besides...in his mind, there was nothing wrong with getting a few more benefits for yourself, was there? So long as such a possibility could help him continue on with both his life and work without any worries over the unknown, he was willing to take that chance. He was more than willing to rise up in the face of these hindrances- even if it took nearly pushing his soul to its breaking point, or unleashing what horrors mankind is not ready for once he manages to crack open a grief seed, he was certain he would find his way through this maze.

Unfortunately, his trickery of the devil himself had rendered him too confident. This unassuming little creature was no devil.

The further he descended down the inferno, the more barricades he had encountered on his way; wounding and injuring him to no end. Even with his soul gem on the edge of shattering, the grief seeds he had gathered were torn apart, watching as his own teammates neared their own limits as he caught up with them during their own witch hunts- the result was the same; he needed to research this even further. The fact that the two objects were apparently made of the same material had led Ludwig to several hypotheses - even coming close to the truth himself -, but, let us be real here for a second- if he did manage to figure out the truth behind the witches, which, logically speaking, he would, would it even come close to bothering him?

In fact...who was to say that, by learning the origins behind these creatures, that he wouldn't embrace the corruption of his soul gem? That he wouldn't lay his old vessel to waste, and treat his ascension to a higher plane of existence as a new experience for him? If that wasn't the case, then wouldn't he also inadvertently boost the process by going through meaningless hoops in the attempt to prevent his pre-written fate?

When looking at a man like Ludwig, a man already too far gone, only cold insanity and sadism irradiated from him- possessing an uncaring glee over the prospect of being able to experiment on the less fortunate souls who got in his way. His insistence on carrying on with his research came to the shock of almost nobody; such was his habit, and the mercenaries got used to his antics over time- yet, as time passed, his grip on his frustrations, desperation, and ever-growing drive continued to waver; everything about this new perspective on life filled him with a sense of wonder, even the countless roadblocks he had encountered still gave him a sense of awe...

His soul gem was as large as it was powerful, yes; it would take a larger accumulation of filth in order to actually affect him in any way or manner, and the reserves of magic he had- oh, how brightly must his gem shine when at its peak! Yet, one must consider at what point will the accumulated filth become...irreversible- how, at a certain threshold, the process of gathering up enough grief seeds to make sure it stays at its brightest at all times will yield more drawbacks than prospects of restoration? That the net value of the magic restored will inevitably hit zero if not the negatives?

How many times must this cycle repeat itself in order for the magi to inevitably give up on keeping their own soul completely pure at all times?

Ludwig still managed to keep his magic reserves somewhat afloat; though his cheerful and friendly mannerisms haven't wavered a bit, he couldn't keep his attention away from the developments that were unfolding before him. The experiments he had conducted on both his soul gem and the grief seeds he had gathered up did not help at all; further damaging and tainting his core only to satiate his own curiosity. He saw no issues as darkness slowly consumed his soul gem- it was simply another phenomenon to experience and document, no? It wasn't like it was hurting him or anything- if anything grim were to occur, he had his backup plans...if he could find one that actually worked...

No matter what Ludwig did, it appeared that his core was strictly bound to this jewel; he wasn't able to separate the souls within it, and, no matter how many times he would place another soul within him, it would just fade away as soon as he reached for it- purifying his soul gem in the process and leaving Ludwig as hollow as he was before the tests.

...He needed to study this further.

Ludwig's worries and starvation for answers gnawed at him. Within his glass heart, shades of ebony and crimson danced around one another, with only a small glimmer of light flickering through the veins existing to provide any form of luminescence, and his eyes-

Mikhail felt a lump on his throat as he gazed into the medic's soul through them- his once bright, fear-inducing blue eyes were beyond bloodshot, and, by his life, he could have sworn he saw the particles of his overheals float amidst the chaos. Still, Misha gulped down his worries as he placed the sandwich on Ludwig's desk and expressed his concerns over his health- to which the doctor thanked him - for both the meal and his considerations -, and assured the Heavy Weapons Guy before him that it was really nothing to flutter his feathers over, in his own words.

It was all going to be worth it soon. He knew it.

Tensions within the RED base grew with every passing day, and nobody sensed it more than Mikhail and Dell Conagher; though Ludwig would insist that he was alright - that it was all a part of the usual routine - and how close he was to a breakthrough, the two couldn't help but look out for the well-being of their medic. For the last few weeks to come, the two would keep a close eye on him- checking on the guy every now and then - as much as they could -, and making sure he hadn't completely lost himself.

His answers were becoming more cryptic as time passed; no matter how much Dell would ask and express his concerns, Ludwig would still act nonchalant, even as his eyes continued to darken with and his health evidently took a nosedive. This was no need for the concern, my friend; he continued to promise the engineer that it was all working out fine, and that he'll be okay once it's all over. Dell still kept his guards up; worried that, one day, Ludwig's gonna go completely off the rails- his and Mikhail's resolution to keep that man safe grew with each conversation they had with him. Something just ain't completely sound here, and he'll have to be there for him when that time comes.

What a hollow vow.

Days blurred with one another in Ludwig's mind. Each passing second held little to no significance to him anymore. No, he had to continue on with his hunts- he needed to. His doves looked at him with worried expressions; the lab was a mess, with papers and feathers scattered everywhere, the lights burnt out, and Ludwig himself slouched on the chair- illuminated by moonlight, and still carrying that damned gem.

And...he was never as satisfied as he was right at this very moment.

He looked down at his beaten-down, darkening soul gem- it was all worth it, no? He gazed into the flickering crimsons as though he was in a daze. He was exhausted, unable to get up on his feet, but he didn't mind that at all. His team will understand soon enough...

The light within his soul gem went into a frenzy- he smiled from ear to ear, for it was finally time; the hour of revelation had dawned upon him. Like a grand supernova, it collapsed into itself.

Ludwig tilted his head backwards, still fascinated by what was happening before him even as all life escaped his eyes. He embraced the corruption consuming him, and, with a crack and a flash of bright light, the entire RED base was sent into chaos.

-The Witch's Nature-

In short, this is tied to the personality/aspect of a magi that did them in; what drove them to slip into despair with their skulls cracking wide open upon impact. To provide a few set examples; Homulilly's was Self-Sufficiency (closing herself off from others as both Moemura and Cool Homu), Oktavia's was to Fall in Love (the infatuation with both Kyosuke and the ideal of a Magical Girl marked poor Sayaka's end), and Candeloro's was inviting (Mami's coping mechanism to deal with her loneliness- and the irony of her dragging innocents into the life of a magi). It can also reflect the intent behind their wish (Sayaka and Madoka) or how they would cope with the life of a magi and the responsibilities that come with it moving forwards prior to their demise (Mami, Kyoko and Homura).

Unfortunately, it is rather....difficult to describe the traits and convictions that cause such complex characters to do what they have done in a single sentence, much less a word or two. For all anyone would know, any of the mentioned above - cause of their wishes, how they cope, and what finally marked their ends - could have been driven by a multitude of a magi's traits and goals, and Ludwig was no exception.

To make this easier on everyone, myself included, I have divided most of the traits that have pushed Lud over the edge into separate segments. The suggested natures listed below are in no particular order; one can fit the bill more than the other. Though I have chosen only one of them for the witch card, ya'll are free to reinterpret it with any of the other suggested natures.

Desperate

Cunning

Wonder

Sadistic

To Experiment

Observant

Curious

-The Witch's Appearance-

"I have a bird head! You're dominated! We're both having a bad day."

This might either be the most fun or the most agonizing segment of the entire thing. As a matter of fact, aside from his descent to despair, this part took me the longest to conceptualize, and it's still not 100% complete in my eyes, oh dear oh me-

Right off the bat- the witch has to be gruesome. I am not placing heavy emphasis on this one just because this is Medic we're talking about and how we're all aware of his...peculiar views on his job and the human body, but it's also due to the aforementioned souls he's surgically implanted into himself prior to contracting. Let me state this again- before managing to find and ensure a contract with Kyubey, the man had already managed to turn the abstract concept of a soul into nothing more than an organ that can be grafted into himself; that ferret's nifty trick is no longer special.

To showcase exactly why the topic of Lud having multiple souls is so integral here, we have to recall that, throughout the Puella Magi canon, we have witnessed witches fusing with one another via various means; it has been stated that Walpurgisnacht was a singular witch who fused with others over time, and Kazumi Magica's Hyades Daybreak was an artificially-created witch born from the fusion of multiple soul gems. You could argue that Madokami is another such example thanks to Homura's resets and wish having her as the main focus; thus binding her to multiple iterations of herself across numerous timelines (as is it made clear to us with Madokami's transformation sequence in Magia Record).

The point being is that not only is Medic's witch's stupidly powerful, but I doubt it would be pretty to the eyes; unlike Madoka, those souls weren't originally his, and the way that he fused himself with said souls is thanks to his, let's say, bizarre surgical skills, and not due to whatever logic is behind the witches' ability to fuse with one another. Think of the core of his very being as an amalgam; whether he's retained his original soul from the Devil's ownership upon contracting or not is up to you, but the idea still stands nonetheless. It wouldn't just be some Frankenstein-esque monstrosity with stitches, additional appendages, and mismatched skin, either; the organs representing the souls he had stolen are there for all to see just beneath his unassuming, reliable, and even charming exterior.

Now that we've gotten some key details written down, we are going to have to examine his role, self-image, history, and the impact his actions had on the rest of the team in order to actually, well, design the bastard's personification of obsession and despair; these four elements are crucial for when it comes to designing a decent witch that would not only fit in the world of Madoka Magica, but also drive home the idea that these witches were once Magi themselves- with their own dreams and goals.

We'll kick this off by looking at Ludwig's role in the canon of Team Fortress 2; he is the de-facto healer, but he's less interested in actually helping the ill and is more into the idea of tinkering with the human form- going as far as to use animal organs for his whack scientific endeavors for the goal of satisfying his curiosity. His healing abilities are also stated to be side-effects of his knowledge regarding human anatomy- even the Medigun wasn't initially supposed to be healing the mercs, according to the lore provided for us.

While on topic, I should also bring Medic's gameplay onto the table; though he is one of the weaker classes when speaking in terms of strength, making sure your team's medic stays on the map for as long as you could is crucial. Think of him as the king piece on a chess board; once your doc out of the picture, not only will your team start to drop like flies, but you'll lose some of that sweet, sweet Uber time. There is a reason as to why Medics tend to stay around the more resilient classes rather than glass cannons like Scout; survival and defenses.

Next up, we'll talk about his self-image and how he is perceived by the rest. As we can tell, he takes much delight in his work and his experiments on other human beings- he doesn't see anything to worry about his interests and the peculiar way he goes about it, no matter how extreme it is. Obviously, the man's not in-tune with the concept of human morality- going as far as to see these unwritten rules of humanity as nothing more than roadblocks on the way of his life.

In spite of his...screws being more than loose, as I already stated above, it isn't like he sees his fellow mercenaries as lesser beings when compared to himself; he does like them, albeit in his own amoral, gory way - he wouldn't have granted them the power of invincibility otherwise, among the other feats in modern science he had accomplished in order to save his team's asses -. Yeah, he does experiment on them, but, at this point, that's just how he says "hello"- and, when compared to what he did to the Classics, the adjustments made were for the active benefit of his team (...most of the time).

From all this, we can tell that his witch is on the more dangerous side (AS IF THE EXTRA SOULS DIDN'T DO THE JOB?)- with a dash of grace, of course; a reflection of his friendly exterior hiding away his twisted interests and "job"- and, fellas, he adores his work. He holds no regards for the safety of his patients and how outlandish his experiments are; he already kept an enemy Spy's head alive in a fridge, for corn's sake. Nonetheless, he is still a competent doctor- more than competent, in fact; when given the right tools, organs, time, and budget- death is no more than a small hurdle to him. He also genuinely cares for his fellow mercs, even going as far as to call them his friends; maybe that's how the witch will see his own familiars? What if he also tries to smile, joke around, and sing lullabies as he cuts open his human victims?

By looking at this being, only unfathomable, suffocating dread surrounded you- for you were in the presence of he who holds the thread between life and death. This creature before you- no, that isn't right...this deity looked down upon his next patient; surrounded by the lifeless husks of his familiars and their victims, he was rather annoyed over the prospect of having his work be interrupted, but he was also more glad that a living being had wandered into the operating room. Yes, he knew it now; a sadistic sense of glee beamed from the monster as he knew that the next medical trial will be a lot more interesting than he had expected.

Finally, to wrap things up, we glance at his history. Now, I am going to give you guys the heads-up in advance, because not only will this segment be composed of speculations for the most part, but we will be discussing themes of ethn1c gen0c1de. If this topic is in any way triggering, scroll down to the part where we talk about either the latter part of his design, his barrier- or just skip right to the Witch's Card. Clicking away from this post altogether is also highly encouraged.

Much of Ludwig's history is currently kept wrapped under shadows- we were told of Mikhail's, Tavish's, Jeremy's, Dell's, Mundy's, and even Jane's lives before they joined RED/BLU and partook in the Gravel Wars, but, aside from the enigmatic Pyro, Medic was the only one whose backstory was never clearly given to us. All we have to go off of are the bits and pieces peppered across the official website(s) and several official cosmetics-

We all know that he was native to and lived in Germany "during an era where the Hippocratic Oath had been downgraded to an optional Hippocratic suggestion" until he had escaped it by hijacking a catering van during a prime minister's wedding for reasons currently unclear to us - it has been speculated it was due to him having stolen a man's whole skeleton, but he had stated that he lost his medical license soon after the incident -. In the Two Cities update, one of the signs present in Rottenburg, his hometown, was that of a pharmacy advertising a number of...odd products, one of which being Baboon Hearts (leading to the speculation that his name has to be Humboldt- as it was the name of said pharmacy and the confirmation that Medic descended from a line of mad scientists like himself). We also know that he had found and then adopted his doves, namely Archimedes, as he escaped via grand theft catering van.

These should be all he scraps we were given in regards to Ludwig as a character outside of his job and the mercenary business, right? Weeeeeeelll....not quite. There is still one more jigsaw puzzle we should piece together, and, when combined with the time period TF2 takes place in, it does not paint a pretty picture of his life prior to becoming a mercenary. Folks...

We have to talk about Ludwig's Jewish coding, and the implications it has in regards to his backstory when combined with the timeline of the Team Fortress universe.

Though it was never explicitly stated to us, several aspects of Medic do shine a light towards this specific direction; to make this easier for us all, I'll just be listing down the evidence present across the canons of both the game and the comics-

The theme song of his bird, Archimedes, that plays during his surgery on Heavy in Meet the Medic is Klezmer music- Yiddish folk music

His pronunciation of "Danke Schon" is the Yiddish way

In the Gargoyles and Gravel comic, he was dressed up as the openly Jewish Albert Einstein for Halloween

The most damning of all, Valve's insistence that Medic is NOT a N-zi; especially with how fanmade cosmetics that portray him in such a way are often taken down almost immediately

Now, I do understand the fact that Ludwig is far from a saint, but...you have to understand the sheer, vile evil the N-zis and their ideology embody- and, unfortunately, he was also another target for their venomous rampage. Add in the fact that it was at full swing back when Lud was a young adult and he probably witnessed the rise of the heinous ideology when he was a little sap, and...there is no way I can say this lightly-

Ludwig had lived through dark, heinous years. Maybe he's always been this crazy, maybe what was left of his sanity had shattered to brittle pieces thanks to what he and countless others were forced to experience- perhaps he was already insane, but the slaughters and oppression were a whole other degree of evil to him; of course, until the writers at Valve say otherwise, all this falls upon how you personally interpret Medic as a character and how he coped with his backstory.

Though this is all just simple speculation based on what bits and pieces of the man's background we were given officially, it does bring into question what Lud had experienced outside of his medical endeavors. Besides, topics surrounding the second world war have already been explored in the world of TF2- Heavy's backstory is one example, where he and his family were sent to a gulag following the imprisonment and execution of his father, a counter-revolutionist; they only managed to escape once it had burnt down. The trauma of the experience still lingers within Mikhail, as was shown to us in A Cold Day in Hell, so such a backstory for Ludwig is not out of the realm of possibility.

With all that in mind, one must wonder about the kinds of thoughts that were running through Ludwig's mind during that time, and place his escape from Germany under a different light. I must, once again, repeat the statement that Ludwig is not a good man, but did that justify whatever he possibly went through? He even went as far as to crash a political figure's wedding in order to flee; was it because of the hilarity factor TF2 and Medic as a character are well-known for - namely after he stole that dude's skeleton -? Or was there another aspect at play- one of utmost urgency? After all, leaving one's home country for good has got to be a difficult decision- he didn't even return to Rottenburg when Grey Mann took over, implying that, unlike the rest, he didn't have anything waiting for him back home...

Ah, it wasn't like it mattered to him nowadays, anyway; nay, he dared not to think about it any further- all that mattered to him now were his research...his experiments...

So, with all the complicated stuff set on the table, let's move on to the simpler bits of a witch's design- the glue that tie all these bits and pieces together!

Where do we start? With the Magi's own design, of course! After all, Oktavia's knightly theme didn't just come from Sayaka's desire to become a hero/Kyosuke's knight in shining armor, and don't get me started on Homulilly's final form. I am certain that there are other witches that would also help get the point across, like Charlotte, but let's not extend this segment too much.

Upon taking a closer look, we can see that Ludwig's design invokes the imagery of a dove - just like how the little nubs on Nagisa's hat are reminiscent of mouse ears (and we all know how her witch form looks like) -, especially with the ends of his coat resembling a dove's tail feathers. Several cosmetics of his that are present in the game also boost this specific theme of his, especially the Blighted Beak mask, the Wings of Purity, and, of course, the infamous Medimedes bird head.

Of course, this might be a reference to the doves in his lab - there we go, simple as that -, but I don't think that's all there is to it; remember, for an amoral, crazed man like Medic, he is still represented by holy themes, much like any other healer in most media. When you think of a healer, you think of a person who swore under the oath of not doing any harm, and have devoted themselves to the life of pacifism...everything that Medic is not. In fact, Medic himself invokes the fear of being before the almighty; how small and utterly insignificant we are in his eyes, and that, to a being with a mind like Ludwig's, our lives are in the palms of his hands to toy with.

Ah, sacricore and holy themes- don't we just love them? The idea of a savior is definitely written down; a brilliant being with evidence of the slaughter staining his hands. Doves are also gonna be heavily referenced- what kind of Medic-related design are we working on if we didn't give him a pair of wings or two?

As a matter of fact, who is to say that the witch isn't a mad, humanoid-ish dove? With his crooked, bright smile and unfeeling red eyes being hidden by his aura and brilliant, white feathers? You think you might be in the presence of a god of hospitals and medicine, and he even approaches you with such a cheerful demeanor; happy to see a patient stumbling into his lab! That is, until you see how red the ends of his feathers are, how wide that smile is under that plague mask of his, and his eyes...

Hang on- is this a plague mask to begin with? As your eyes finally focus...you can see that it is jutting out of his skin- it's not a mask, but a part of his skull.

Next, we are going to focus on the magi's weapon and what powers they had prior to witchification; now, I am aware that their weapons and their powers are not always reflected in their witch designs - coughs coughs, Kriemhild and Homulilly -, but it does appear to be an "either/both/neither" case for when it comes to analyzing and designing them - I mean, just look at Ophelia -. Besides, Team Fortress 2 is a combat-oriented game, so it would be of great disservice to the game if I did NOT incorporate the main vessel in which you would use to bludgeon your enemies to smithereens with.

Once more, the Medic's main shtick is healing and granting your team a wide number of buffs depending on the medigun equipped; the Kritzkrieg grants a 100% crit chance upon activation, the Vaccinator provides immunity/reduced damage against several damage types, and don't get me started on the number of buffs a Medic can grant their team alone in the Mann vs. Machine mode. For now, we'll just be focusing on the classical Medigun, and how it grants invincibility to both himself and the person he is healing upon activation.

As seen in Meet the Medic, this was possible due to the adjustments made on each of the mercs' hearts- or, what replacements they have received in place of said organs, considering that even HEAVY'S had burst from the pressure caused by his medigun's rays. It is shown to us that the heart begins to pump at an accelerated rate upon activation, likely to spread the influence of the medigun at full power through the subject's veins; turning them into a bulletproof behemoths ready to turn the enemy team into a pile of mush.

From this alone, we can pinpoint the idea that hearts are an important motif in his witch's design. I'd also wager that he'd also possess powers that aren't unlike the functionalities of his medigun; allowing him to heal himself, his familiars, and even other witches at close proximity- bloodthirsty, erratic mercenary or not, he is still the team's doctor. Once the witch starts glowing red, you only have a few seconds to either find a weak point as soon as you could or make a break for it.

To further build upon this theme, attached to his back, not looking too dissimilar to how his medigun backpack, are vials filled with fluid that each resemble the lights of a soul gem at its limit. Within them, he stores his victim's souls, blood, guts, and organs for future usage. How did they get here? Why, with his other appendage hidden inside his forearm; resembling a combination between a saw and a needle. It is easy to use a surgical knife, yes, but some patients are...less than cooperative.

Before we unveil the finalized-ish idea for the witch, I should also take a second to talk about his hypothetical barrier and possible witch's kiss/warlock's whisper. It is true that the most powerful witches in-canon don't exactly need to hide in their barriers - case in point, Walpurgisnacht, Kriemhild Gretchen, Hyades and Shitori Egumo -, but, if we go by the concept art pertaining to Kriemhild Gretchen, we can see that they do have labyrinths they call their own. Even Walpurgisnacht has a pocket space she calls her home; it's the none other than the monochrome hallway Madoka was running through during episode 1, as confirmed by the PSP Game. If neither Walpurgis nor Kriemhild were exempt from this rule, then it shouldn't be surprising to see that this also applies to Ludwig's witch.

As stated in the January 2012 issue of Dengeki Playstation, a witch's labyrinth represents "the magical girl's mental landscape before they became a witch"; Oktavia's was a concert hall- resembling the one where she would watch Kyousuke play the violin, Candeloro's a tea party for one- representing how she would cope with her loneliness and the fact that she arranged her meetings with Madoka and Sayaka as tea parties -, and, according to the aforementioned concept art, Kriemhild's barrier is an obsidian and magenta void full of floating furniture- specifically those of her and her mother's rooms.

From these examples, we can assume that the barrier represent core memories of the magi before they fell into despair, and are either tied to the reason behind their wishes or how they coped with their lives after contracting:

Madoka had a healthy family life in comparison to the other members of the holy quintet, and it is thanks to the environment she was raised in that she ended up becoming the merciful, selfless girl that we all know today

Everything about Homulilly's barrier just represent how much Madoka meant to Homura, even if she didn't exactly see her perspective 1:1; as such, the rundown state of Mitakihara City not only represents her time loops and how it is the setting for all her time loops, but also how she failed to protect Madoka in the end and to grieve the normal life they could have had- had it not been for the universe and everything it stood for standing against them (it might also foreshadow the choice she had made at the end of Rebellion; trapping her team and the rest of the city in a gilded cage so that the incubators will not have a chance at hurting Madoka ever again)

Nagisa didn't have much of a social life outside of school, her run-down home, and visiting the hospital where her mother was at- and it is within that hospital that she proclaimed that she was done with being the perfect daughter to someone who barely deserved it; that it was her turn to take control

We can even tell that Sayaka watching Kyousuke's concerts was such a pivotal moment in her life because of how this specific memory was shown to us at least twice during the series; when she explained what happened to him and the cause behind her wish, and as soon as her soul gem had reached the point of no return- albeit for a split second.

Of course, this is not necessarily a strict rule to follow for when it comes to designing and deciphering witch labyrinths; H.N Elly's barrier resembles a snow globe in composition - according to production notes -, Charlotte is having a tea party with a doll in which both of them are unable to respond, and...I am not 100% sure on what to make of Ophelia's barrier- though I will come back to it later. Barriers don't have to be based on actual locations that are significant to the magi's life; rather, they can be manifestations of their desires prior to witching out- Elly wished to preserve a happy memory that gave her a shred of respite in the midst of the stressful life of an idol; and the tea party symbolizes the relationship Nagisa craved from her mother, that she was the timid one of both parties- silent as a doll, and how ultimately hollow that wish is- in the end, it's just a toy; it cannot respond to her even if she could speak, nor could it comfort her.

Unsurprisingly, I can see that Ludwig's barrier could be an infirmary...no, that can't be right; after all, Ludwig does what he does not out of compassion for the sick, but because he could. He seeks to change and perfect the mercs; turning them into unstoppable killing machines forged by his own hands and mind. He usually does all this to satisfy that itch in his mind and the excitement whatever results he gets from these surgeries bring him. It looks like a place of respite for one's health, but it is a death trap, first and foremost.

As a reference to his escape from Germany, maybe Ludwig's doves are still flying around the barrier; blood and feathers staining the floors and hallways, and themes of uprooted trees are peppered in as paintings and ruined potted plants. This represents the panic setting in and high speeds of the van, on top of how he came to discover and adopt these feathery companions of his, while the uprooted tree symbol suggests that he has nothing waiting for him back home in Germany; the other mercenaries went back home after the events of Rings of Fired (sans Pyro and Engie) except for Medic, after all. Maybe he was just lucky(?) enough to immediately land a job amongst the classic mercs, or perhaps...he just couldn't go back "home", not after everything.

Going back to the canonical barriers for a sec, one part of when it comes to designing a proper labyrinth is that, sometimes, a person can sway your heart so much they could change the trajectory of your ideals and influence the way you look at both your actions and the world around you.

This is most evident in Ophelia's barrier, as seen to us in Madoka Magica Portable; though it's hard for me personally to decipher exactly what it is, there's a fuck-ton of symbolic elements literally swimming around there, including musical notes floating from the ground and into the air. I don't think I need to specify exactly what said notes represent here.

Since there are multiple rooms within a barrier that can serve different functions, perhaps there's an outdoors segment where the magi first end up in; a frigid winter wonderland threatening to turn this labyrinth's visitors' limbs into unfeeling, darkened blocks of frozen meat falling off their bones. The only salvation from this bitter cold is to enter the interior segments of the barrier, and, even then, you are still not at all safe; his familiars are still on high alert- whenever they aren't "looking after" the other patients present -, and the infirmary in of itself is nothing more than the lure of an anglerfish- fooling the humans who have stumbled into it and punishing them to a fate worse than death.

The conveyor belt stretches through the halls of the labyrinth and leads right to the center; the operating room. There, the doctor awaits either his next batch of organs - human or otherwise - or a new patient. Ah, how everything runs smoothly; the bloodshed, the violence, the screaming- such fine melodies, they nearly compelled him go and play a tune on his "bone" saw at this very moment.

Another small detail that I want to pepper in is that there are the sounds and vibrations of a heart beat that echo through the halls of the labyrinth's interior sections. Perhaps there are slices of lavish wedding cakes (the van), pretzels (Germany), and all manners of bread (the mercs and that bread monster) that are being served in the canteen- and, before you ask, no, I would not recommend eating them. I know I already said that hearts are a core theme of the witch's design itself, and maybe the canteen thing is a bit too farfetched, but, hey, a nice detail is a nice detail.

Finally, so we can wrap this whole segment up already, we'll discuss the details of his witch's kiss/warlock's whisper. Now, Witch Kisses in-canon are...weird; they hold less consistencies than the witches themselves and their barriers, so it is hard to draw out the necessary similarities needed to create a decent design. Some witch's kisses are tied to the witch's type (Uhrmann, Homulilly), designs (Oktavia, Elly), and their grief seeds (Kriemhild). Sometimes, I have no idea on what they represent at all! (CANDELORO) I'm just gonna go on a limb here and just...wing it.

-BADUM TSS-

Okay, okay, that was horrible, I'm sorry. Indeed, wings will be a key theme- specifically 6 of them; not only are they reflective of him being a dove, but also to boost the holiness theme he has going on and to symbolize his earlier deal with the devil. In the middle of it, a clawed, red hand grabs on to an anatomical heart; whether he is handing it out or taking it for himself is unknown. Upon closer inspection, one can see that it is affecting the victim's veins, causing the area around the whisper to turn into a deep, glowing red; remember how the ubercharge works, people.

Finally, finally, after two months of hard work - two months of AGONY -, we have it; the moment we have all been waiting for...

-Witch Card-

Asclepius, the Warlock of Reconfiguration. His nature is wonder. A revolting, mad avian who conceals his sickened mind with the appearance of a plague doctor, and a charming, silver tongue. Upon gathering up those who would become the volunteers and patients for his latest medical trials, his very own ward begins to choir and hum with every slice and stitch made on his victims' bodies; readjusting and mutilating their forms to fit what piqued his mind at the hour.

The leftover organs are then either stored for his future endeavors, swallowed whole by the warlock in order to improve upon his own self, or are kept alive - perhaps even conscious - within his barrier as a testament to his prowess; eternally trapped and wailing for the liberation of death.

-Familiars-

Galatea. Servants of the Warlock of Reconfiguration. Their duty is to worship. The warlock's beautiful creations- the culminations of his medical curiosities. Right out of the operating tables, they would test out the enhancements blessed to them, and continue to be of good use to the warlock by defending his infirmary and the operating room. Those who cross paths with the Galateas will not see a hint of hesitation- they are willing to keep the bloodshed around the labyrinth ongoing for the sake of their doctor, even at the cost of their own lives.

Though the warlock prefers the blank slates that are the humans who get admitted to his infirmary, he would still pick apart at and experiment on his Galateas, whether in order to fix them, enhance them using the organs of his victims, or to salvage as much of their parts as he could- perhaps in order to rebuild them in the future.

(Familiars are said to be "projections of a magi's heart before they became a witch"; as result, their duties can range from directly serving the witch - the Holgers representing Sayaka's desire to be in the center of Kyousuke's attention, and the Anthonies are tasked to care for the roses Gertrud cherishes from the bottom of her heart -, to becoming obstacles to all, sometimes even to the witches themselves - the Klarissas' only task is to dance around Oktavia, Anja's stated to have been separated from Albertine, and dare I talk about how the Clara Dolls represent Homura's self-loathing over her inability to save Madoka? -. It isn't uncommon to see that a familiar can be based on significant key figures in the magi's life, especially if they were either related to the wish they made or the cause(s) behind their despair.

These buggers here symbolize Ludwig's love for not just mutilation, but also reinventing the way his teammates' organs function- and, as I mentioned before, his deep trust in the mercenaries. He also compared himself to the divine on numerous occasions and is followed by multiple holy motifs in spite of his little deal with the devil going on; he was even followed by a choir and his doves flying behind him as soon as he stepped into the battlefield in Meet the Medic.)

-

Hubris. Servants of the Warlock of Reconfiguration. Their duty is donation. Bound by their hauteur and the broken bones of their bounties, these pathetic prisoners of the warlock have been chained and are treated as nothing more than livestock by both their master and his other servants. Watching their own organs and other body parts be pulled apart from one another before regenerating once more for the continuation of this cycle has drained all hope of ever escaping their punishments from their eyes- not with these atrophied limbs and sore boils.

Their stringy, rotting flesh provide little to no sustenance for neither the warlock nor his other familiars, and are too fragile to use for his medical trials - hence the need for human patients -. Nonetheless, they are bound to these spare operating tables, awake at all times, as the claws of the other servants pick apart and toy with each and every one of their fibers. The warlock finds humor in their agonized howls.

(They resemble misshapen versions of the TFC team - barring their own medic -, since we are going with the assumption that he took their souls rather than those his own teammates. Why I went with the idea of the classics themselves becoming his familiars is and are not just projections of how Medic saw them during his time working with them is due to how both Walpurgisnacht and Hyades Daybreak had their respective original forms re-manifesting as their own familiars.

Yes, Cheavy gets the worst of it.)

-

Archimedes. An old friend of the Warlock of Reconfiguration. His duty is attendance. As he glides through the bloodstained halls of the infirmary, this dove, whose pristine feathers have long since been soaked with a deep crimson throughout his master's countless trials, would not only take part in the warlock's surgeries as the role of a willing audience, but he would also stand by and even assist (Asclepius) - all the while satisfying his own morbid, sickened curiosity -. Of all familiars, the warlock treats this one with the most respect, understanding, and fatherly affection.

(Not a familiar that looks like the bird, not a familiar that is inspired by the bird- it's the fucking bird itself.)

-Inspirations-

In-game:

His doves, and the fact that Archimedes was a WEDDING DOVE before Medic found him

Him hijacking the chancellor's van during his wedding in order to escape Germany (and eventually finding then adopting Archimedes who was within it)

His silver tongue clashing with or weirdly complementing his deranged personality and actions; would it translate into his witch looking more humanoid, among other traits? Well...

His usage of animal organs to compensate for the fragility of human organs might make the humanoid aspect of his witch sort of moot

His bonesaw and how he plays it like a violin (non-conventional musicals?)

The Vita-saw

Ubercharge

Him playing cosmic systems like a damn skipping rope to his advantage (reviving Sniper and having multiple souls sewn into himself in order to scam the Devil out of their deal). This does not work with Kyubey, like, sir, your surname ain't Kaname, if memory serves me right

The Blighted Beak cosmetic; its Vibrio Cholerae style specifically, as it would better fit Inu Curry's art style

Medic's gameplay in both the vanilla game and the V-Script Zombie Infection mode

"And no wonder! For even the devil disguises himself as a being of light." - His association with themes that are considered "holy" and "good" in Meet the Medic and several of his own cosmetics...yeah, no need for me to go into detail as to how ironic this all is

Outside Influences:

The Greatest Living Show by Itoki Hana and Toby Fox (wow, I have an addiction to Itoki Hana's songs, don't I?)- evident especially with the heart beats in his barrier

Repo! The Genetic Opera

German fairytales- especially with how some of them revolve around mortals dealing with otherworldly beings

-Closing Statements-

To be completely honest, I wish I was able to actually draw this shit and not make ya'll read through this drag of a document and leave the gist of it up to your imaginations. I also have to apologize for how rushed it is near each segment's ending; I initially wanted to publish this around the start of October, but it was far, FAR from finished by the time it rolled around.

This has been a wild 2 or so months; constantly looking up references and refining the concept time and time again along the way, and it is still not perfect (especially with how the description of the warlock's appearance), but, overall, I am very happy to have managed to deliver it during spooky season.

I should also give a huge thanks to @bluethepearldiver! Not only did they support me incredibly so throughout the process of writing this in ways I cannot write down so easily, but they've also helped me with the names of his familiars and that RAW line ("Unfortunately, his trickery of the devil himself had rendered him too confident. This unassuming little creature was no devil.")! So, please, do give them the support they deserve ;0;

Once more, I am more than willing to listen to suggestions and criticisms; I'm aiming to not just improve upon Asclepius, but also the other mercs' witch forms when the time comes (I even have a concept for Scout's)! Do not be afraid to send an ask or even tag me regarding the matter- I'll do my best to reply (if Tumblr gets its head outta its ass and does its job notifying me for once)!

Thank you all so, so much for reading all this! I appreciate any and all engagements and feedback coming my way.

[thewertsearch]

Asks Comp - 16/4

I literally did not know The Baby Is You was a thing. To be welcomed back into the comic like this after four months is very on brand for Homestuck.

... and wow, its outro really does match the end of this song, doesn't it? That's even funnier than if he'd snuck some of Megalovania in there.

Ooh, that's another liveblog I'll want to check out when I'm done! I've never actually seen a Worm liveblog before. Adding it to the list myself!

Nothing's really changed since I've been gone! I make a conscious effort not to do much Homestuck analysis off-blog, since I want my journey to be fully documented here.

It's good to be back! I'm looking forward to a full reread when I'm done.

Would you believe I didn't even know there was a book?

I also didn't know the movie had two (allegedly) terrible sequels, which is very funny. Neverending story indeed.

Thank you! I can't take too much credit, though - most of my tagging system has been crowdsourced from askers!

At some point, before we reach the end of the comic, I'm going to have to formalize my approach to liveblogging Homestuck's side content.

What I'll probably do is give each of them the 'lite' treatment initially, but if they turn out to be more canonical than I thought, or particularly interesting to liveblog, I'll 'zoom in', and analyze them properly. We'll see how we go!

Could you imagine the relationship dynamics in your average troll soap opera? The shipping web for a single season would make our heads explode.

It's a fun question. What sort of object symbolizes everything?

The first thing I'd try would be a star chart, Dave's magnifier and a literal planetful of Grist.

Added to the list! Not until later later on, though - I'd worry that the opinions and theories of another liveblogger could interfere with my own, especially if they're talking about it with someone who's already read it!

I would find it hard to disagree.

Do people think Act 1 is pointless?

I mean, it is the slowest Act in terms of pacing, but slow pacing isn't always a bad thing. You sort of have to take it slow when your readers have this much to get to grips with.

...okay, maybe we didn't need quite as many Sylladex mishaps as we got. But we still needed some. Homestuck has a lot to introduce you to.

I always pictured an English accent for Hass - although, interestingly, I didn't picture one for Jade. As a headcanon, I like the NZ one better.

Where did Grandpa grow up again, actually? He was raised by Fake Mark Twain, who was from Missouri - but I don't have a clue what a Missouri accent sounds like, let alone one from a century ago. I have a funny feeling that it's not the accent I'm imagining coming from Jade.

Now that's a ship I'd never have seen coming. Props to Hussie for coming up with something more controversial than my Feferi<>Equius.

All four kids, with four endgame weapons, might be able to challenge Jack's current incarnation - but they're not going to get the chance. You've hit the nail on the head - he's semi-perfect Jack for a reason.

I have several theories for Jade's prototyping, and every single one of them would make Jack even more dangerous than before. It's just barely possible to challenge him now, but things will only get worse.

Read the room, Serket!

Would Vriska have tried to negotiate? She feels like the type of person who'd rather take a beating than admit they're outclassed. Plus, I'm not sure how much she'd have to offer Aradia, who seemed entirely motivated by revenge (and, possibly, secretly motivated by timeline stuff).

All that said, I would have loved to hear Vriska trying to worm her way out of this.

I love it! Please send in the completed house, if you get the chance. That's going to look so cool with a moving meteor.

And they're both easily distractible! This feels like two people who might actually get on surprisingly well, if they were in, say, the same high school class.

It's hard to say what's a rarepair, since I don't know what ships are rare in the fandom - although I'd have a few guesses about the most common ones.

If we're going for a ship with very tenuous connections, I will submit Rose x Feferi for your appraisal. They're both fans of the Noble Circle, and their signature colors are pretty close.

You know what, I'll just review all of your ships. Tavros/Gamzee - PB&J - is pretty cute. [] I'd recommend Miracle Child for a number of reasons, but it does include a well-written Gamtav. Jack/Droog is more <> to me than it is <3. Like One Sundered Star might be influencing that? I'm not really sure. Somewhere I think I saw a Jack<>Droog. Your pre-shipping chart post isn't in the chrono; also, I'm pretty sure the A6A6I5 ask is one of mine. Gamzee/Eridan is a rarepair; I've seen it, but not often, and it's a <> in the fic I'm referencing. Kanaya<>Terezi and Feferi<>Vriska are strange enough that I've never seen them anywhere, really. [] And finally, Vriska and Tavros. These two are the textbook example of why the ashen quadrant needs to exist, and they're a perfect pair for it. [] ~LOSS (8/1/23)

I don't even know if Carapacians have moirallegiance - but those two would definitely work if they did.

Out of all my ships you flagged as rare, I think my favorite is Feferi<>Vriska. I just think they'd gel weirdly well together!

[demystifiedstardust]

Researching Constelic

Cw subjective opinions.

⚠️ This is intended to be an analysis of what I've been able to dig up concerning the topic of constelic identity, and how it exclusively applies to myself. I have no intention of invalidating anyone's constelic experience. This piece contains both positive and negative opinions on stelling exclusively as a framework, and is not meant as commentary on people who use constelic terminology for themselves. Still, I understand that a person very attached to stelling may take this analysis personally when no offense is meant. Use your best judgment on if this piece is appropriate for you. ⚠️

While searching for fresh ideas, I stumbled upon the constelic community. It seemed promising at a glance, except for an important detail...

...is there a community?

I can find lots of flag and coining blogs, but actual constels are nowhere to be seen. I can't find anyone talking about the experience of stelling at the time of this writing, save for an anonymous submission blog (and during my research, I hit the bottom of #actually constelic, wow).

Well, that and... from what scant information I can find about the subculture to begin with, it seems less about experience to begin with, and more about label hoarding.

I'd like to say right now that there's nothing inherently Wrong or Bad about hoarding labels. Some people find meaning in doing so. That being said, I am not one of those people. Label hoarding isn't what I'm looking for in a potential identity-centric community.

Hoarding constels feels like... the aesthetic of an identity, without actually exploring an identity? I don't see the appeal of not engaging with your own identity. I wouldn't have made this blog at all if I didn't feel strongly about that. I don't have a desire to curate and grow a list for the sake of keeping a list. While there's nothing inherently wrong with aesthetics either, for me, the list is secondary to the experience itself.

This aestheticization of identity permeates the various terminologies under the constelic umbrella. Orbiting, veiling, constel(ation)s, phases. Why is the core terminology celestial-body-based? Is there a reason, other than aesthetic? Everything not immediately celestial-based is a rebrand of existing kin words, right down to stellie as an alternative to kinnie. Why is all this hyperspecific vocabulary necessary for a concept that has yet to be adopted by a core base of users, if not for aesthetic?

The end result is something that feels derivative of kin, without the organic community and subcultural development of kin. I think it was meant to be a more inclusive alternative to kin, but in its current state it feels forced. That there are posts in the tags at all indicates an amount of success, but it still feels like a sterile environment, like the internet version of a staged home that's never meant to be actually lived in. The lack of discoverable experiences compounds this feeling. It's unfortunate, because there are aspects within the framework of stelling that deserve to be explored.

The lack of separation between "identify as" and "identity with" is the most attractive feature of stelling in my humble opinion, as these two concepts can become fuzzy and fluid between each other. This is something I experience with my relationship to vampires and deep water. I oscillate between both modalities, and while the oscillation itself causes me no discomfort, there isn't much in the way of community that can accommodate a fluid state of being such as my own.

This lack of distinction serves as both an affirmation of freedom of identity fluidity within the label, as well as an anti-gatekeeping measure. I also like the affirmation that a constel can be obtained and dropped at any point in a person's life, contrary to the heavy insinuation in kin spaces that identity is permanent and inherent. It theoretically creates an environment with comparatively less expectations and more wiggle room to parse out an identity without fear of mistakes.

The constelic symbol is also really logographic! I can't say the same about some other logos in the same vein, like the fic//tionkin keys symbol. Perhaps as expected from a framework heavily concerned with aesthetic, but it still should be noticed and appreciated. I'm a sucker for good graphic design. One more thing I like is the color scheme on the basic constellic flag. I hope the creator is proud of themselves, because they did a great job.

So as a concept, there are many things I really like about the constelic framework of identity. Unfortunately, the hoarding aspect of constels is incompatible with what I desire for myself. I want to understand the different aspects myself--how they influence me on a granular level, how they influence each other, how they paint the picture of "me". I want to play with my identity, and I want to be serious with my identity. Above all, I want to engage with my identity. This creates a conceptual disconnect between me and stelling.

In practice, the constelic community is barren and unpopulated. There's nothing of substance--no connections between other people, no posts to read except endless coinings that may or may not have a practical use. It's disappointing but not surprising, given the constelic framework's leaning toward identity hoarding and not engaging.

Ultimately, I don't have a use for stelling in my life, aside from comparing and contrasting it to my ideals. My march continues onward, but this was an interesting pitstop.

[oconist]

azda your tags on that 'oconundrum' post are just...*chef's kiss*

the whole 'esteban has been a shitty teammate' narrative is so overblown and every time redditors repeat that or some other dumb shit about esteban it fucking boils my blood.

the amount of times people bring up alonso's dnfs last year to declare that 'esteban was actually shit' even though they're qualifying paces were very close. and the 'deep analysis' and 'calculations' people would do to estimate how many points alonso lost last year were...questionable. like people were actually saying alonso lost out on 60-80 points in the 2022 alpine...girl be for fucking real. not to mention they don't bring this same argument up in regards to esteban's 5 dnfs compared to checo's 2 in 2018 or literally right now with esteban's 8(!!!) dnfs compared to pierre's 3. nope just automatically 'wow esteban's so shit - he's never beaten a teammate in the championship standings!'

and the amount of vitriol and ire over a single incident from 5 years (in which both people involved made mistakes) is so fucking ridiculous. there have been so many documented instances of esteban and max being friendly since brazil 2018 and people still act like max hates him. the fuck? we all saw the rbrs crash in baku 2018 but everyone acknowledges that maxiel's doing just fine. like what the fuck? also there's max's entitlement in brazil 2022. or his use of racist and ableist slurs? any issues with that today - apparently not! but esteban accidentally crashing into max while trying to unlap himself - devil he's the devil. don't even get me started on the whole 'max was totally justified in shoving esteban - he had a arrogant look on his face'...

reddit goes on and on about how 'they're not toxic like other forms of social media like twitter or instagram' which is such fucking bullshit. daniel made a little quip last year about getting esteban for secret santa and literally everyone was all like 'see even daniel hates esteban! and they were teammates. esteban's a shitty teammate with no friends. hur de dur!' cut to daniel's gift to esteban being arguably being the most personalized and highest quality one of them all...

fuck...that was a HUGE ASS rant i'm so sorry. i'm just...so sick and tired of the esteban slander. this is my safe space.

no because you are speaking facts as usual. este's car last year also was damaged/bad but didn't dnf a couple of times, so if we start adding stuff like that, we should also add a hundred variables more to see who truly was better.

este was unlucky to have his longest teammanships with two guys with crazy ass fanbases, the amount of hate is so much to the point where i have seen alonsistas themselves be like 'hey too much' to other alonso fans regarding ocon.

like with pierre, pascal and daniel, zero issues.

i think the ratio of fans : haters or at least people that seen him as persona non grata is so disproporcionate towards the hater side because he's easy to punch down. he´s not vocal when he's not at fault, and when he was (the infamous renault radio) he's seen as a whiny crybaby as usual. people in the neutral side get easily swayed by the amount of hate people have towards him, but at least the situation is improving!! at least this brazilian gp, tons of brazilian fans were being very nice towards him and i've seen more and more people defend him, even spaniards.

feel free to rant any time you want <3

[honeybeewhereartthee]

My Darling Dolls AU: Idols, 3rd-4th dolls and Watchful gaze.

<previous || Table of content || next >

Your always with Mayoi but since Tatsumi joined your group, he said your old enough to go out alone.

Since your boss in your part time job is also telling you off not to bring your doll with you to work all the time since someone would pull a prank on you and you would throw a fit when you see something bad would happen to mayoi, when left unattended.

It already happened before it cost traumatizing event to the dumb coworker of yours. Not that you care about his mental trauma since he made himself suffer in the first place.

You work in a cafe, sometimes you work in a convenient store. You work hard because you have no one but your dolls in your life. But even through your pushing yourself to work now and then.

Your not problematic about stuff since your always felt relax when you chat to mayoi or be in the presence of your dolls.

"Hi ~ welcome to cafe-- oh! It's MC!" Your new coworker, Niki Shiina says as you open the door to the cafe.

"Hello." You greeted him with a wave.

"Ehh... You don't seems to bring along that doll of yours today." He mumble as he sniff you.

"...oooh." your weirded out by him but your not one to judge. " Yeah, sumisumi(tatsumi) says. I shouldn't always tag mayoi everywhere." You walk to the worker longue.

"Aww. But that's an improvement for you then~ how tragic I can't take sniff of two mouthwatering scent you two have if I ever be hungry." You heard Shiina says before he went to the kitchen.

You stare at your coworker back as you analysis his words. You always did hear him says that you and mayoi smell so good. It's salivating scent that Niki can't get enough off. Very odd.

"Ooh. You smell good too. Like fresh made onion flavor bread stick in the kitchen, Niki! Hehe." You complemented back. You have no words to reply to that odd comment he have earlier. Might as well do the same type of comment to him.

"Wow really? You have good sense of smell too huh! I did made some bread sticks!" He yelled out from the kitchen, since theres no customer yet in the cafe. You two are free to do what you want. You quickly went to the kitchen to look at the bread sticks that Niki made.

"Woooah....can I have someee?" Your eyes sparkle at the sight of the delicious looking bread sticks. To be honest, any dish Niki made are all delicious and mouthwatering.

"Of course! I made extra for me and staffs! Through it's mostly for me, hehe." He give you a cup full of bread sticks. Your quick to grab the cup and take a bite and you felt heaven in the first bite.

" Yummmyyy!! Your so talented niki~~" You complimented Niki talent yet again which made him smile and flustered.

"Hehe. Thank you~~" Niki scratch his head but soon take some bread sticks to eat with you.

After few more bites of the heavenly taste bread sticks, you keep the rest for mayoi and tatsumi.

"Thank you for the food.. I wanna marry Niki so he could cook for me every day." You said in a praying kind of way, in front of Niki, who laugh at your words through a little red tint appear on his face again.

You could say, you wanna hire Niki as your personal chief but you have no money for that, so being married is another way to make him cook for you everyday.

"Huhh.... You wanna marry Niki too? " You felt someone put their hands around your shoulder, at that moment you felt that odd feeling of the unknown sensation of non human presence again.

"Hmm... mcmc is one of my favorites ( wallet ) we can both marry niki~~ gyahahaha." You turn to look at Rinne, one of Niki friends.

"Hihi rinrin!" You greeted him. His a regular in the cafe. So it's not a shock you know him. "Oh yeah, that's remind me... You and Niki are idols right? Like pair idol if I remember correctly..." You remember about tatsumi past being idol, since that day your interested knowing more about idol, so you could help him up when he wish to sing in the stage again.

"Woah... So your finally acknowledge the existence called idols? Gyahahaha. That took you a long while, mcmc. But yes I am an idol! I'm going to be the number one idol! With billions of fans screaming they love me!" He boosted.

"Ooo! Then from now on. I'll be you and Niki fan! Hehe!" You swear to rinne and Niki --who care less about being an idol as he busy himself in cooking the moment your attention went to rinne.

"You really don't have to indulge to every thing rinne says, mc. If you indulge him too much you going to end up broke when your wallet is stole-- oi oi why did you suddenly take out your wallet?!" Niki watch in bewailed and worry as you take out your wallet to offer some cash to rinne, even through you have some budget to maintain, as a loyal fan for those two. Your going to donate what you can to help out.

"I would like to buy an autograph." You don't know much about idol and fan work but all things comes with payment. So getting an autograph might be something that needs payment and not something free. " Gyahaha. Mcmc really don't know how idol work, but I shall accept this money!" Rinne who was frozen by your action laugh hysterically and accepted the money from you as he needs some cash for tonight gambling.

He was about to nicely ask Niki for one and totally not plan to steal his wallet but since you donate some money to him, he did not have to do so. He takes out a permanent marker he luckily have with him as it's one of the idol thing to have since you never know if there's fan wanting an autograph!

"Where do you want me to sign? " - Rinne.

"please do sign here, you two!" you puller out a fake form. You smiled so happily as you wanted to make a joke like this for a very long time. You have heard about this joke in the internet when your browsing in the internet about idols.

"... Gyahahaha. It seems this a well planned out." Rinne who stare at you in daze as you pull out a fake printed marriage contract like your very ready to make this kind of joke any other day.

Chuckling as takes the paper from your hand to sign to indulge with your joke, to your bewailing surprise.

"Niki come over here to sign here too... Or else I'll kill you ( ùwú)/." Rinne called out Niki who's busy in the stove.

"I'm quite busy rinne...*sigh...Wait." Niki says as he sigh. He soon turn off the stove and went to where you two are. He take the pen from rinne and mindlessly sign the papers, not even reading it.

"Here you go~ through I won't really think it's a good idea indulging to rinne amusement." Niki is quite worried about you since you never seems to bother about staying away from rinne when his a big red flag.

"... Gyahahaha. Niki really don't bother to read the paper. Very Niki indeed." Rinne laugh at Niki as well ignoring his words. "Huh?" Niki look confuse at Rinne.

"Lol, it's nothing Niki." You says as you hide the papers."yup it's totally nothing Niki! Gyahaha." Rinne added.

"We should go a registered office so we could be both married to Niki heheh." You whisper to rinne who whisper back in amusement.

"gyahahaha...! Good plan, mcmc!" You and Rinne both laugh to yourself which made Niki quite worried what's up with the two of you. Yet his busy with work so he don't butt in with the conversation you two have.

You three enjoyed such warm and fun moment before you two have to throw rinne out of the kitchen since work have start.

Indeed you become the two's number 1# fan, when your in your free time. You would always come to the live they have. Sometimes you tag along tatsumi and mayoi.

You watch the two grow in fame for 2 years but somehow there something that made them forgotten by the people and they become something of the past as new idol unit come and raise up fame and leave others to dust.

Along those two years, you still busy looking for the last two dolls. Yet no sign is found. Mayoi and Tatsumi says that you really don't have to go far to search that hard for the last two dolls as they would come around if it's really fated to have the batch be reunited one day.

Speaking of darling dolls, it never occur to you some people you know are one. Maybe because they live without owner or really good being a human.

That's why when the down fall of the idol unit of Rinne and Niki come around in the corner and days since you last seen the two, you come across a corner on some alley way back to your home, one night.

"Rinne... I'm so hungry..." You heard a familiar voice spoke out.

" Gyahaha.. it's really a surprise to me a doll form of yours still able to feel hunger. Niki! Sadly I cannot do anything about it. So here have a hand." Another familiar voice replied. Your eyes widen as you realize those voice are rinne and Niki, the two who went MIA for days.

You don't know what's gone to you as you quickly went to the alley way even though it look very dangerous. The sound of your foot step alarm the two.

"Oh no, someone coming up... Your so noisy rinne... Were gonna be experimented on now... Ahh... So hungry... Wait... This scent...?!" The voice of Niki complained as the sound of something running and banging come to the edge of rhe alley.

"Niki? Rinrin?" You called out to the two in worry.

"Oooh-- it's mc!... Wait... Should we appear in front of mc in this form, rinne?" Niki voice seeme to echo in the alley as you can't spot the two. "Gyahaha... Might as well try our luck... shall we, Niki?" Rinne chuckle echoes along the alley. You worriedly look around for the two again. "Say... MC, remember that you have responsible for that contract from two years ago. It's time to take us to your home without asking why." Soon two dirties and messy dolls that is similar to rinne and Niki walk out of the shadows. Niki is being piggyback carried by rinne.

"...!!??" Your quick to went to your knees and hug the two cute dolls. Not caring if they are dirty or messy. "Woah so cuteeee. " You cooed, you already felt your doll maniac self is appearing out in the open as you smooch the two with kisses.

"Woawoah...! Calm down there tiger!" Rinne who is being rained with kisses almost drown from the kisses and flustering moment your giving him.

"MC smell so good... Can I take a bite~~ " Niki in the other hand is in an inch away from biting you.

"I have some food with me, Niki. Let me just kiss you two more in those cute doll form uwuw. Love you rinrin. Love you Niki!" The moment you saw them as moving dolls, the fact they are darling dolls is confirmed in your mind.

You already know the drill. Since they are important people in your life.

Your willing to help out in the way you can. Saying such words already have meaning and meant what you say.

*Poof.

As the two drown in the affection, the bar for them to transform back to human have been filled. Soon they both appear before you as human.

"Now your two back to being human! Hehe." You hug them both. Your happy that they are seems fine after long absent.

"It seems that mcmc know about DD huh." Rinne scratch his head as he hug you back, he is glad he don't have to threaten you or have to beg for you to take them in or at least take Niki in. Through he did question someone in your status able to grab hold of one. Maybe you brought one from a shady street seller?' he thought and guess correctly.

"MC~ your scent really make me full. But where's the food you said earlier?" Niki in the other hand is already search for the food. "Here you go!" You give him the sweets and candies you have from the work today.

"Woah!! Thank you! I love you too, mc!" Niki hugs you back before he eat the sweets like a sin of gluttony. You and Rinne watch him eat like he never eaten for years, and both chuckle among yourselves.

That day you brought them back to your home. Mayoi who open the door for you, saw the two. He stared confuse at the new comer.

He don't hear your bringing along friends. If he did he would have hide in the closet!!

"...woah! It's mayoi! So your a darling doll too!" Niki who's eating some cookies says as he smelled mayoi familiar fragrance from miles away stared at the humanoid mayoi. "Ah???" Mayoi suddenly don't feel good as he felt his being stared by Niki like his some main course dish.

"Sup? Were your new roomies! Gyahaha. How small the world is. It turn out mc have DD all along. The names Rinne Amagi." Rinne introduce himself as he point a finger gun at mayoi. "Through, you can call me mcmc's husband! Gyahahaha!" He added which made mayoi even more confuse by his statement.

"Did you says Amagi??? Wait what do you mean...H-husband..?!" Mayoi don't know which one he should be worried about in that very moment.

"Woah, I don't know you two are married, rinne." Niki who also married to you too base in That fake(?) marriage contract, is surprised as well.

"Dumb Niki really don't know a thing, gyahahaha." Rinne went for a headlock. "Rinne! Swisbwoz!!! (Stop) " Niki complained and start to tap out from rinne demostic form of violence.

"Ah, welcome..." Tatsumi who come from upstairs in the makeshift alter he made for praying heard noises and your name. He saw new people and greeted them, through he did heard about the topic just now.

He needs to talk to you about how marriage is a sacred and holy thing you cannot make a joke off, later it seems.

"Hihi, sumisumi!" You wave to the priest. He smiled warmly at you and the two.

"Shall we talk in the better place?" Tatsumi suggested as the four of you are crowding the entre way.

The place he says a proper place is your room, they all transform back to being dolls and are now on your bed as you seat in a chair beside your bed.

You explained what happened to the two as well the joke from two years ago. You have framed the autograph and hide it under your bed, forgotten by time. As you explained and others introduce themselves again to one another.

You watch them as your being nag by Tatsumi about this and that. You look at the middle of the bed, where Doll mayoi keep running from Niki who just want to have to take a bite of him.

You don't know if it's a joke or not but mayoi is scared either way. Rinne just went off your radar as if his off somewhere already, he later come out of your bed dragging the framed fake marriage contract and show it off.

"Gyahaha. See. Now I have higher status than you little champ of my brother." Rinne boosted yet again, in his doll form holding the frame that's is bigger than him.

"W-wait-- what...?" Mayoi look at the framed in surprised, as if not believing what his seeing. He went and read the context of the contact." Ahm... Why did it say you two are married to Niki Shiina being the lawful wedded chief and the two who should be feed by him with his dish till he dies?" He seems very concern and confuse why there's a marriage contract that state that.

"Huuuhh?! Rinne, mc. what is this about? I could still cook to you two without that, you know." Shiina isn't concern about it through. He just think you guys going far silly than others as make a fake contract on making him a chief to be able to eat his dish for free. He is willing to cook for you two if you provide him ingredients in the first place.

You and Rinne laugh evilly as the context of the contract is been known now. Rinne did read about the contract you made 2 years ago and think it's an amazing deal to push to the oblivious dumb Niki.

Tatsumi sigh as he realize the supposed to be marriage contract is first lifetime chief contact to Niki. Through he is taken back why he sigh in relief in the first place.

Some questions run to his mind but the group already move on different topic and decided to have a late night dinner with everyone as well welcoming party for the new two members of your family.

The night is long as you and four dolls have some fan in the small home...

The night soon ended and slept taken over your system. Saying good night to everyone as you slept on your bed with the four in their doll form.

You don't realize that a certain dou stared at your bed room window, showing your sleeping form with two alkaloid dolls right beside you and the two new comer is on top of you all in their doll form.

Sleeping cozily, unalarmed from the lurking two across the street on top of a lamp Post.

Two set of eyes. One is green that shows envy yet mask with fake amusement and the other is purple one who watch observingly.

"Should we be worried?" The smaller one ask the other.

"Hm... Indeed that person have been deep in the Darling Dolls community... Almost collecting two unit... I wonder what they wanted to achieve in such fit." The taller one voice show amusement. He stared at his partner who is one of the member of the other unit. He wonder if he too would join in your little harem.

"... They don't seems to cost harm yet. Shall we continue to watch from afar, madara-han?" After a long pause. Kohaku Oukawa seems to think about your situation as it's not something to be worried about but the higher up seems concern about how you gotten yourself four DD under few years. They are willing one too.

"hn.. there's nothing to do if they aren't evil.... Well, my child is never be of an evil as their mama is." Madara Mikejima stared one last time at your direction. A small sigh before he have his usual smile pasted on his face.

"Let go... We still need to report this to the higher up." Kohaku already turn to depart. Madara laugh as he too left the place.

A certain red haired doll open his eyes from faking his sleep. He turn to look at the window.

"...agh... This is worrisome. It seems double face is hot on our heels." He mumble as he went and close the window with his little doll body.

"Gyahaha... But isn't this interesting... How fate would work out, I wonder... Shall we all bet what the dice of destiny show it's outcome?" You stared at you and the three dolls. He smirk. He can't help but felt the thrill of what comes next.

....

Having Rinne and Niki as your third and fourth dolls, seems like a surprise as they come in bundle. The two would sometimes live at Niki's apartment since your place is crowded with five people living in it. (You did plan to look for a bigger cheap home while your at it. )

Niki would be the personal chief for everyone, he would continue to work at the cafe with you after his long absent at work.

Rinne sometimes would be out for a while because of some stuff.

Probably gambling addiction of his. He did sometimes mumble about who would first complete the unit batch. Crazy:b or alkaloid, like it's a game his waiting for a winner for a long while.

Mayoi and Tatsumi always sigh when rinne is around. They said only their unit leader would able to handle the nutcase called rinne Amagi. That leader being called Hiiro Amagi. Rinne's younger brother.

Somehow your nightmare is not much as it's was before but the two unit would take turns who would sing for you even if you don't want them to bother about such routine.

Rinne would sometimes tag along with you because of a reason he don't explained to you, through he did look around for something every time he did tag along with. It seems that someone is following you.

He said to you as a joke. You do know thats not probably a joke. Your thankful for rinne being worried about your safety but tagging in your work and hangout in the cafe, not even there to buy food is not good for business.

A/N: huehuehue. Here's a 3.5k words and your 3rd and 4th dolls! Who shall be the next one to join your harem-- cough I mean. Family! How's the story so far?

[benbamboozled]

Okay as someone who only tangentially knows about nightwing, I enjoyed the grayson series. I'm a whole-ass lesbian but watching him walk shirtless through a desert carrying a baby? I suddenly understood the whole "being straight" thing. Grayson cured my heterophobia lololol.

ANYWAYS it seems like you've actually read other nightwing comics so I was wondering what your take on the grayson series is? Is it OOC? If not, do you have any other comic recs where I can 👀 that 🍑?

Lol I actually haven’t read Grayson! Because…lol, okay, THIS IS STUPID I AM FULLY AWARE OF THAT, but because I resent the idea that Dick Grayson needed a series where he’s ALSO a super cool hot spy who’s a badass hot spy. ~~~OOOOH GOOD FOR YOOOOOU!!!!~~~

(Yes this is one of my personal foibles, sometimes I resent things for existing because I am odd and petty.)

I’ve thought about reading it for The Pretty, but I know certain fandom circles are, uh…less than enthusiastic about it, and certain other character fans are less than enthusiastic about it (*cough* Midnighter), so I just haven’t decided that I’m open to potentially being grumpified in favor of The Pretty yet.

Basically, I absolutely cannot speak on how IC or not it is. 🙃 I do know that I’ve read two things by Tim Seeley—one I like that a lot of people don’t (Robins) and one that was ABSOLUTELY ATROCIOUS LIKE TERRIBLE ON EVERY POSSIBLE LEVEL GAG VOMIT UGGGHHHH (Countdown to the Wedding: Red Hood vs Anarky—do not punish yourself with this it is so bad).

Sooooo I have no idea what that says about whether or not I’d appreciate Grayson!

Honestly, though, my Dick Grayson absorption is all over the map, so I’m not so much a great person to give recs I think.

Like, my foundational Dick run (hm) was Devin Grayson’s Nightwing run and, uh, that run is CONTROVERSIAL (to put it mildly), for some reasons that I agree with and some that I don’t. It also left me with a…very particular set of preferences when it comes to Dick Grayson In Comics.

(You know how 1984 starts with “imagine a boot stamping on a human face—forever”? Yeeeeeahhhh.)

If you’re in just for the pretty, the current Nightwing run—Leaping Into the Light (kind of a soft-reboot of the premise starting with #78 of the 2016 run)—is REALLY gorgeous. Like…wow. Not so much on a beefcake level necessarily, but like…gorgeous man f-i-n-g-e-r-s-t-r-i-p-e-s acrobatics long legs strong back mmmmmmmm. (I cannot be more coherent than that, just…guh.)

(I do NOT keep up with this book for the plot. The plot is…sigh. Lackluster. And the characterization is…kind of generic. AND IT TOOK NIGHTWING #93—A CONTROVERSIAL YET IMO GROUNDBREAKING ISSUE—AND BASICALLY RE-DID IT IN A WAY I FIND FRANKLY PRETTY OFFENSIVE BOTH TO STORYTELLING IN GENERAL AND THE WAY IT TREATED THE ISSUES ORIGINALLY HANDLED IN THE COMIC. ANYWAY like I said, I’m shallow and into it for the pretty pictures. Also it’s DC, and my evergreen tag “comics are bad and I hate them” is evergreen for a reason.)

I’m certain that other people who follow me have better recs/suggestions, so if anyone who follows me has insight on Grayson or feelings about good Nightwing runs for (*cough*) 🍑-purposes and wants to chime in, feel free! Reblog, reply, whatevs!

(Just, you know…if you have STRONG feelings, try to remember the “don’t yuck someone’s yum” principle. Criticism/analysis+discussion is great, but I try to keep things not suuuuper OTT negative. I don’t want anyone to feel bad about liking things.)

(No yucking anyone’s yum unless it’s Tim Seeley writing Red Hood vs. Anarky. I will never be nice about that comic and nobody can make me.)

Hopefully you’ll get some better info, anon!

[mysaldate]

i tried to take your vil analysis post seriously when i saw it in the tags because i enjoy his character as well, but the way you described the other overblots made me wonder if i went crazy. why was it necessary for you to misinterpret the other dorm head's + jamil's trauma to justify your favorite's? ALL of your summaries were incorrect. most significantly painting jamil as hypnotizing kalim for the dorms good. you can not convince me jamil living involuntarily as a servant for his entire life is a better fate than being typecasted in school plays. and then the way it devolves more in the end into a rook hate post? i don't like the guy either, but the only thing he did at the end of the chapter was judge his team (that was just put through the gutter) from an objective standpoint. furthermore, you can say that rook is a gaslighter for calling vil overweight and whatnot, but that is at best just plain rude. rook doesn't have nearly as much power over vil as you think he does. i'm sorry, i'm not saying that your entire point of vil being misrepresented should be overlooked, but you have to get your facts straight before you make large claims.

Wow, you just missed the entire point of the post.

And you missed what Vil's trauma really is too.

And you're calling an abuse survivor's testimony an overreaction.

I'll wager a wild guess and say you're an EN only player because the things you claim are incorrect are very explicit in the JP version of the game. The reasons I gave are reasons the overblotees used THEMSELVES to justify their behavior. Vil doesn't do this, he doesn't justify, he accepts he was wrong and that's what breaks him. Jamil used the "It's for the dorm's good" defense before he was ever ready to admit it was personal. Yes, it was. Nobody's saying Jamil didn't have a reason, and I am not claiming Vil's trauma is worse than Jamil's. In the first place, comparing trauma is stupid and damaging to both sides. Vil's trauma isn't being typecasted in school plays and if you think it is, you have either not read his story or you skimmed it as briefly as you have skimmed my analysis of it.

But sure, let's compare here. Both Jamil and Vil were systematically dehumanized since a very young age, just for different reasons. Jamil because of classism and Vil because of the way he looked. Both things they can hardly do anything about. This led to them both having deep-rooted insecurities about themselves while outwardly presenting as confident. Vil got physically abused because of this while Jamil was forced to taste-test for poison which landed him in a coma at one point. Is Jamil's situation more difficult to get out of? On paper, yes. However if you actually play the game, you will see that Kalim is taking active steps to improve Jamil's situation as much as he can already, and will probably take more in the future. In Jamil's case, having one person in his corner is enough because once Kalim takes over the family, he will have the ultimate sway over everyone's freedom. Vil's situation is a lot more complicated because it doesn't lie in the hands of a single person but rather a whole industry which is honestly unlikely to change.

As for your issues with me providing proof Rook is a gaslighter, it's not about calling Vil fat, which you would've known if you'd actually read the post. It's about purposely making Vil doubt his own senses (I look at you more than you do so I know you better), making him "choose" (Would you rather trust me or everyone else?), and saying that Vil will be isolated and forgotten if he doesn't do as Rook tells him (By the time they notice, it will already be too late). Same for Book 5's ending. If Rook was being "objective," he wouldn't have voted for a nursery rhyme remix where the dancers bumped into each other constantly because they couldn't have even been bothered to learn the choreography properly. He should've just said that he picked Neige because he likes him better. Not blame his very subjective choice on Vil's trauma response. Rook's gaslighting becomes clear once again in Vil's dorm uniform story where he lies to Vil and pushes him into not telling the Pomefiore students what he's doing for them because "Nobody but me would appreciate you anyway."

And, again, you are telling a real abuse victim that they are overreacting when pointing out the most blatant textbook definition example of the type of abuse they went through (among others, mind you) in recent media.

But what do I know, twstEN deletes most of this anyway so maybe that's why you're confused. At least, I want to assume that's what it is and that this ask isn't malicious. If you do play twstEN, I have a wonderful post compiling many of the differences between versions because BOY are there a lot and none of them good.

Next time, you can come off anon. I don't bite, nor will I harass you. I'm a working adult (you know, the ORIGINAL target group for the game) with better things to do with my time than to bother someone who can't even read what they're criticizing me for.

[digestionsack]

Franz Ferdinand on Mike’s Playlist—Y’all This is Too Funny, They Need to Stop

Okay, remember how in my Mike’s playlist analysis posts I said that “Be Afraid” by Franz Ferdinand stumped me? Yeah, so I revisited it today and…

Wow.

Okay.

So, first of all, I don’t know how I didn’t get this before, but even though there are barely any lyrics, saying that the lyrics foreshadow Mike getting Vecna’d isn’t too much of a stretch. Here they are:

“Don't be afraid if you hear voices/Feel the sweet air spoken upon you/Dream again/Sometimes the sound of a thousand whispers”

We’ve talked about this before, but I’ll rehash it in my own words for the sake of context. “Hearing voices” could easily align with the Vecna visions, “dream” is a motif we see used on the playlist that I am currently going through (almost finished!) to reference hallucinogenics (a metaphor for Vecna’s visions) and generally a theme of “things aren’t what they seem.”

So yeah, I’d say these lyrics foreshadow Mike’s eventual Vecnafication. However, it’s still kind of vague on what will be the result of that Vecnafication, and the fact that this song is so short…kind of wigs me out. I think death for S5 Mike is fairly likely, considering the lyrics I’ve analyzed on this playlist and the death tags you all have found. However, whether or not he’ll come back has been left kind of vague…freaky. I personally think that he will, but this still scares me.

I honestly should have stuck this right on the “Holy Shit” list—not because of the song, but because of the artist.

Well…sort of. When I first went back to revisit this song, I was only looking for the lyrics to THIS PARTICULAR SONG. And the lyrics did provide a lot of information. But the real meat of why this song choice is currently blowing my mind is not because of the lyrics, but because of the other songs the artist has created. Lemme give you a list. There are…several interesting ones.

“Lucid Dreams (2009)”

“Michael (2004)”

Miss me with that shit. Please.

Now, the fact that these songs are next to each other is due to alphabetization and not symbolic meaning left for Stranger Things fans, but I just think that little detail is neat.

And…HOW can we say that Franz Ferdinand having a song called “Michael” and then a song by that artist being on his playlist is a coincidence? Answer: WE CAN’T. BECAUSE IT’S NOT. And an artist who has also given us song name gems such as:

“Lucid Dreams”

“Always Ascending”

“Demagogue”

“Dream Again”

“Evil Eye”

And more.

Seriously? You expect me to believe that the creators didn’t see this? The Duffers? The Running-Up-That-Hill-can-be-abbreviated-to-RUTH-and-so-the-Nina-Project-will-be-in-Ruth-Nevada-and-the-fake-name-Nancy-uses-to-talk-to-Creel-right-before-she-and-Robin-realize-that-music-can-help-Max-will-be-Ruth-as-well Duffers?

Yeah. No.

BUT. FRIENDS. THIS ISN’T EVEN THE FUNNIEST PART.

“So,” you say, “there’s a song called ‘Michael.’ Interesting, but all in all, big whoop. Unless the lyrics say something interesting, we can’t really use this.”

DON’T WORRY, MY FRIENDS. INTERESTING LYRICS COMING YOUR WAY.

…sort of. The lyrics aren’t exactly too appropriate, and I don’t know where your guy’s comfort level is at, so I’ll just link them here. If you don’t feel comfortable reading the lyrics, here’s a summary from Wikipedia:

In short: It’s super gay.

Like, no beating around the bush here. No inexplicit subtext that can be twisted about. This song is almost SMALLTOWN BOY LEVELS OF GAY. (Although, that’s up to your personal opinion.)

Gee, guys, I just…*takes off tin foil hat to run hand through hair* I just don’t know. Am I crazy? Delusional? Loosing my marbles? I mean, could it just be a coincidence that the very last song of Mike’s playlist happened to be both foreshadowing his Vecnafication in S5 AND created by an artist that also had a song that literally shared his name that, objectively, reaches almost “Smalltown Boy” levels of gayness? Am I crazy? Or does this mean something…

You decide.

Again, at this point, someone may have pointed this out already. Like, probably back in 2017. I know I’m late to the playlist party. But this song is just way too much.

[likeadog]

Wow that person would NOT have made that comparison so flippantly if they knew anything about why modern and contemporary art are seen the way they are in the modern day. Strongly encouraging everyone to look into the Nazis' "degenerate art" exhibition and their particular loathing for modern art. Jacob Geller has a very good video on this if that is easier for anyone to digest. Sorry those tags genuinely have me enraged I have no idea how anyone can be that stupid with their entire chest.

god i wrote this big long thing and tumblr ate it

but like the point is theyre making an unreasonable statement to compare to my own in order to discredit what im saying unfortunately this fuckwit doesnt know what theyre talking about. first of all framing titling and markmaking are all techniques so that is "how to fucking paint", but even then my post wasnt about the techniques applied to fanwork or even fan analysis but rather the theory behind it and overall attitude towards what is both consumed and then made vis a vis transformative content. technique and theory are separate but related things i use to approach art criticism and analysis and yes that even applies to fanwork because it doesnt need to be high art to be art, but it being art doesnt mean it has to be good

which brings me to the appreciation thing like of course i comprehend why those things are made but appreciating art is being able and willing to try and meet it on its level as a "conversation". that doesnt mean you have to like what its saying or bother sticking around. i dont even dislike smut on principle. acknowledging something for what it is doesnt mean you have to like or respect it and i certainly dont respect anyone who spits some dumb shit like this god bless their soul they need it more than me BONKKKKKK BOOO TOMATO TOMATO TOMATO

[mediacinemtographyartetc]

Good Omens 2

I might include pictures later :p

Truthfully a story can exist but the way it is viewed by the audience and the enviroment that shaped their experiences and made them reach the conclusions THAT was what I was trying to say, to help people understand a persons mind process on why they might THINK or come TO the conclusion that Good Omens might be queerbait [even though thats not what 'I' was thinking] but only delving into a small tip of the iceberg of queer literature of subtext as homosexual relationships pre-80's was frowned upon, and had to be villianised. Or when it was finally accepted were then killed. Or to only create a false please both audiences with a will they wont they [unconsented edgeplay] of two men JUST being friends and friendly who are brotherly and just really just pals.

So an older audience who had been used to watch lukewarm shows that 'claimed' to be lgbt only to rip that tag away once the show was over and they were then payed has made others [myself included] timid in queer media and would rather WAIT until a show was over before watching it.

So anyway- I would love to do a more in depth analysis of a LIST of queer stories that had some patterns, patterns that most fall into thats just dryhumping the line that is both queer-approved or queerbait.

________________________________________________________

In 2019 when Good Omens came out, I thought wow if I was in a relationship it would be like that. Crowley and aziraphale I felt seen, I couldn't describe what it was like wanting a relationship but feeling guilty because it wasn't the same as all the OTHER relationships in media. It was different and it was PERFECT.

SO Good Omens is a love story, and it's obvious on whose story it is BUT what I just realised from Season one is the many parralells of COUPLES thats in Good omens to compare against Aziraphale and crowley.

As most things when it comes to same sex couples they have to be subtext [sad face] but it is insulting to claim that ALL lgbt content HAS to be the same. There is a spectrum just because Good Omens isn't as obvious as Interview with a vampire [series] or our flag means death or others doesn't mean its any less queer.

So we have the couples in the series that actually correlate and can be compared to the main couple!

They come in twos.

Adam and Eve. Brand new to the world.

Same as Aziraphale and Crowley both brand new, both leaving the garden of eden almost as if they themselves were just like Adam and Eve I bet God was looking at them the same way they were looking at Adam and Eve.

Adam with a flaming sword

Azi/Crowley; their fucked.

God watching Aziraphale and crowley WITHOUT the flaming sword ; Their fucked.

The way both Azi/crowley met was a love at first sight, they met the once and then bumped into each other conistently. My guess here is that this explosive burst of emotion of instantly liking each other and relying on one another after that first 'night'

Almost reminiscent of anathama and Newt.

Then later on, you have the son of satan well- the parents for the baby swap.

So you have Warlocks parents, the mother who stays and raises warlock alone and the husband who is CONSTENTLY in office and is kept away because of his work and devotion to his president, to the cost of both his loving wife and warlock.

Aziraphale is just as absent when he's constantly up in heaven or talking to gabriel about ending the apocolpse and also Aziraphale was a bit neglectful as Crowleys influence was much stronger than Azi's was in shaping warlock. That physical distance is parralell to the distance has made with crowley making his work [being an angel] his priority.

Then the comparison of adams family, how both raise Adam but its the way the two communicate and talk with one another. Both parents are a team, the way his wife teases her husband for being a big softie about Adam and his dog and the other denied it.

JUST like how Azi says Crowley deep down is a nice person and the other puffs up like an angry bird.

And the last couple but no more obvious. Honestly I always thought the fact that you see THREE love stories play out simultaniously at the same time is the main factor but given that the other mini couples are similair to Aziraphale and crowley was too good to ignore.

So Both shadwell and Madame Tracy.

The fact that Madame tracy had red hair and kept flirting unashamedly at Shadwell and the other kept insisting he wanted no part in it. The truth was theirs was subtle compared to the obvious [ahem] couple of Newt and anathama but when you look at how both tracy and shadwell converse with each other was subtle, not in your face but it was plain as day that the two had chemistry.

With all pairs together every single character in twos are usually a couple the only reason thats not the case are GROUPS.

And lookie here, the four horsmen, adams gang, and both heaven and hell itself have clusters of groups together they never have that official two pair.

idk I just thought it was a neat contrast to the main couple ^^;

Theres probs more but if people want to add on feel free :D

Okay years ago, I made a "Is Good Omens queerbait." Post and did a half ass job if it. The answer no its not bait. Its another LGBT piece added to the tiny treasure box that is slowly getting bigger. But I didn't articulate that post well on WHY certain people were claiming that not the homophobes or acephobes [fuck those gays as a asexual queer myself so back off] it was WHY did LGBT members think at the time that good omens was queerbait.

Truthfully a story can exist but the way it is viewed by the audience and the enviroment that shaped their experiences and made them reach the conclusions THAT was what I was trying to say, to help people understand a persons mind process on why they might THINK or come TO the conclusion that Good Omens might be queerbait [even though thats not what 'I' was thinking] but only delving into a small tip of the iceberg of queer literature of subtext as homosexual relationships pre-80's was frowned upon, and had to be villianised. Or when it was finally accepted were then killed. Or to only create a false please both audiences with a will they wont they [unconsented edgeplay] of two men JUST being friends and friendly who are brotherly and just really just pals.

So an older audience who had been used to watch lukewarm shows that 'claimed' to be lgbt only to rip that tag away once the show was over and they were then payed has made others [myself included] timid in queer media and would rather WAIT until a show was over before watching it.

So anyway- I would love to do a more in depth analysis of a LIST of queer stories that had some patterns, patterns that most fall into thats just dryhumping the line that is both queer-approved or queerbait.

So If I get dogpiled again with acephobic or homophobic trash again or accused of NEEDING to see two men fuck [which I fucking dont I'm sick of people assuming shit that I never said I WANTED that when did subtext VS text equel Sex HUH? Words of affirmation or holding hands? Like thats where MY MIND is at you fucking perverts.]

[discet]

I just binged the first season of the arcanist marcy wu and I LOVED IT!! the vibes! the feels! the writting is wonderful you put so much work and thought into it and it's awsome!

I love your reading of all the charecters you put at the end of the chapters it's such a cool addition and I loved hearing your thoughts

I love your analysis of marcy anne and sasha, somewhere back thre you put in a line like "love is not a moral compass" and it's stuck with me so much as I was thinking about the trio's problems, since it's somtihng I alwasy had trouble putting into words since they both deeply violently love each other but are also willing to do terrible things with the excuse that they were doing it for each other.

oh! and the subtle differces in marcy and sasha drive me up the wall everytime because they're the kind of people who are scary alone but you can tell that whenever they put up a united front, they're gonna get whatever they want(like when anne is hesitant about stealing the music box) but they're also very different people

ah sorry about so much but well I just binged like hundreds of thousands of words and my brain hurts

oh and I lved all the little things that stayed the same because anne dosen't cause them, but they end up compltetly different because marcy is just a wildly different person from anne, the tax toads are the obvious exsample but even the smaller stuff like the family shrub, driving bessie, the election all that stuff the world stays the same but the outcome changes because the charecters are differnt people and I think that's just a mark of a really good swap au for any story

Wow! Love getting these kinds of asks in my inbox, they are always a delight. ^_^ I'm so glad you enjoyed the first season. It was a labor of love. :)

'Love is not a moral compass' is honestly one of my favorite bits of character analysis I've done. While it was originally an explanation of Marcy's motivations vs. moral framework, I think you're right that it can apply more broadly to the trio's toxic friendship as a whole.

Please rest your brain. That is a lot of writing to read in what sounds like a short amount of time.

On the last note, yeah, I think that's always the most important thing about writing a swap AU. While its super cool to take canon events and see illustrations of all the characters swapped places, I think the important thing for a swap AU fanfic is to see how the characters react differently when presented similar situations and then following the ripple effects from there.

For anyone seeing this in the tags and are curious, here's a link to the AU

[sotwk]

So... Hi. To answer your question I may or may not have accidentaly done a charactor analysis/looked to far into this. *laughs nervously*

In age order:

Mirion; SO, he's the first born, and was (unintentionally) the most celebrated begetting. At the news of his pregnancy the enture kingdom would be celebrating, the king and queen would be ecstatic because elf pregnancy is increadably rare.

Cheehoo hes born, the Kingdom has lots of party's and celebration, excuses for wine. (Also side note, did the tradition with the Calarsil start before or after he was born?) Fast forward, and the little elfling is growing up, the only one of these to be a single child for a brief (to the elves anyway) amount if time, and Thranduil and Meareth dont know for sure if they will have another so this kid gets alot of love.

But also, (again unintentionally) some pressure as crown prince but yet, as we can see from his interaction with baby Leggy (who by the way is a pressious ball of joy and I will protect him to my last breath) and the new parents, he has quite a bit of compassion and diplomacy with people.

Empathy and a cool head, both important things for a future ruler.

He is also a great blacksmith, so, creative output! Its healthy!

Also; ✨green eyes✨ Love them.

Turhir; Second born, His begeting may not have been quite as celebrated as his elder brother's, not by lack of love at all mind you (Thranduil and Mearath are good perants as far as I can tell) he just isnt the first yk. He may have been a suprise, may not have been, but a second pregnancy in an elven family is ✨awsome✨ thank Eru and all.

As a little kid he probably trailed after his brother, thats what tiny thingamajigs like to do, but one day he starts to realize "hey, this isnt as cool as I thought" so his attention switches around and he tales interest in other things, (I personally headcannon that he had a sewing addiction at some point Nanath got alot of handmade gifts) when sudenly he sees Master Ivanil.

He thinks "wow thats cool, I bet I could do that" so he starts training, open hand fighting in particular which takes alot (as somone who started this officially at age 6 can confirm) he probably -to his mothers horror- gets a few injuries.

But he sticks with it and he's flipin good at it. Then he takes a mind to be the training master, "delightful" his mother thinks with a grimace. But this kid is determined and he trains hard, even the master knows it.

You also pointed out thats hes stern, but not so much that he can't realize that his little brother needs a little attention, and he didn't turn Legolas over while he was having his day out, showing he does know when to loosen up a bit.

He's a nice combination of ambitious, instinctive, and compassionate.

Arvellas; third born of our esteemed elven king, again the king and queen are absolutely in love with their precious little elf, though find themselves often reminded "the third child is always the intersting one" the queen probably didnt put much though to this, the child is perfect to its mother.

As he begins growing up he probably spend alot of time tagging after his brothers, and ignoring his studies. (My favorite part about hus chapter is the mental image of Thranduil fliping out about his child being illiterate) so when he starts dissaprearing for long periods of time around the age 13 his Nana is probably "mom worried"(trade mark lol) but he dosnt get hurt... I just imagine Mearath's immense relief to find him reading.

Also I assume he keeps a little journal with quotes written down in it.

From Legolas's love of his book I can tell that he has a brilliant mind and an entertaining style of writing, as well as a sweet temperament and open acceptance of varieing temperaments and tastes.

All in all this guy is a huge sweetheart as far as I can tell, also brilliant. Beacause, he can speak a whole bunch of languages? Including a slight understanding of Khuzdul (I havent read the simarilion but that's suposed to be a huge undertaking fir and elf to even begin?)

Gelir; fourth born, and Oh this guy. At thus point I want to hear the gossip from the people cause the king and queen are lucky.

Despite being one of the slightly less accepting of his brother's presance in his space I think its probably because my boy is insanely more comfortable around animals than other elves.

He likes his time away from palace life and hang out with his more fur coated buddies, he doesn't strike me as an ellon who particularly like conversation. Not to say that he can't in fact he has probably talked the cook out of a few snacks for a wounded animal. 

He comes off as kind of distant from Legolas, but it changes when they have somthing to connect over, (baby elk baby elk baby elk-) and he even lwts him stay, regardless of the fact that he may not have anything major to contribute.

He's a nice guy, in his own element, and may be the most mysterious to the elves of the woodland realm.

His ability to ride/tame so many speices suggests that he probably has a calming presence to those he chooses. And hunting takes patience and thought so great attributes!

I'm also 95% sure he's homosexual and 89% sure he and Darthol have some chemistry beyond mere friendship.

And... Green eyes.

All of this (and alot more that I've gotten rid of) to say, wOw, excelant charactors and I dont really know if I have a favorite! There's so much detail in each one even from the brief glimpses we got!

Also I am so sorry I took so long to answer, lots of children to watch here 😅

My SHHEEP friend @laneynoir binge-read my six-chapter work, "Greenleaf's Day Out" and left a quick review for each of the chapters. I asked her to do me an additional favor and answer a simple question for me: "Which of the 4 OC brothers I created for Legolas did you like best?"

In response, she took the time to write out the above extremely detailed and thoughtful analysis of each of the four characters. My mind is blown and my heart is full.

I feel like Frodo when Aragorn pledged his support at the Council of Elrond.

THIS. This is how you make a fanfic writer feel truly appreciated and "I could cry" elated. Obviously she went waaaaay above and beyond, but feedback like this is so powerful; I am over the moon right now and feel motivated to continue writing about these characters. I had been second-guessing the merit of my concept of Thranduil's family/OC sons.

Look around the reblogs, and you will see that I'm not the only creative who suffers from crippling self-doubt and imposter syndrome. I think we all do. We need our readers' help!

Whether it's an artist or writer whose work you love, if you ever feel a desire to support them or slight guilt that they are giving you their work for free, please just tell them what you think about their work. That too is "free", but is utterly priceless to the recipient.

Please consider doing the same for a writer you enjoy/follow. We all need and deserve a reader like @laneynoir. I'm grateful to have you, mellon nin!