#a soft place to land

[zukosdualdao]

a soft place to land

zutara month, day 16: injury recovery, @zutaramonth

summary: in the aftermath of an assasination attempt on katara, she finds herself safe in his bed, zuko looking after her from the bedside.

warnings: assasination/murder attempt, complicated thoughts about punitive judgment and executions, etc, excessive use of adverbs, lmao.

other notes: title taken from "a dream is a soft place to land" from waitress.

Katara’s eyes flicker open. She immediately sets to prop herself up on her elbows, struggling not to groan with fatigue and discomfort as she does. 

The sheets underneath her are gold and silken, the room around her faintly familiar.

She’s in the Fire Nation. She’d been here as an Ambassador for the latest treaty revision. A servant… a man dressed as a servant, anyway, he’d served her tea in the private chambers kept for her here, and her throat had begun to swell, panic building as it did, chest burning as the door slammed ominously shut behind him. She remembers lifting her hand shakily, trying to guide her blood to keep the toxins from working through it, but she couldn’t tear it out of her without extracting her own blood, it was no use, she couldn’t think—her head met the floor, brow slick with sweat, she was going to die…

As she looks around in the darkness, it occurs to her exactly where she is now.

“Zuko?”

He’d come looking for her just in time.

The last thing she remembers before her awakening is the taste of something herbal and sickly sweet, being overcome with sick and the aftermath of bile, Zuko’s gentle hand cradling the back of her head, and then succumbing to the darkness.

“I’m right here,” he says quietly in the dark, and when she turns just slightly to her right, she can see shadows cast over his house face. He’s sitting in a chair by her bedside, folding in on himself and wringing his hands until he casts his worried gaze up to meet her eyes. “It’s okay. You’re really okay.” He sounds almost disbelieving. “How do you feel?”

It’s quite the inverse of the last time she was here when he was the one prone on the bed, marked by lightning, and she waited up all night for him to wake again, too wired to sleep, needing to keep a weathered eye on his wound.

“Not amazing,” she manages a bout of shaky laughter. “But I’m alive, so that’s something. How did you know what to… ?”

Zuko was alone when he arrived and fed to her what must have been the antidote, though she thinks she remembers the patter of other footsteps arriving after the fact, possibly a sea of medics.

At this, Zuko leans back in his chair a little, rubbing an embarrassed hand at the back of his head. “Oh—my mother learned about plants and things from her mother.” Zuko’s mouth tilts into a frown. “I think she was an herbalist? I’m not sure.” He shakes his head. “I didn’t know what they’d used but—we keep something stocked here. It’s not a cure-all, but…” Shrugging again, he sighs. “Thank Agni it worked.”

“Forget Agni,” she murmurs. “Thank you.” Something that might have been panic if not for her weariness swells in her chest suddenly. “The man… ?”

Even through the darkness and the haze she still finds her mind in, she catches the way his pupils dilate, the way his posture stiffens. She’s seen him angry like this before. Protective-angry. She imagines his fingers are probably curling hard against the edge of his chair as he grips it, but looking down to check seems difficult and unnecessary. “Hired assassin.”

“Oh.” It’s sort of strange to think she’s an important enough figure that someone would try to assassinate her, that her death wouldn’t be a simple murder but rather to make some political statement or another. “That’s new. For me, anyway.”

Zuko’s had a few attempts on his own life in the past year, as she recalls. Most of them she read about through letters after the fact—she was here for the last one, though, and thank the spirits for that. Stab wounds are simple enough to heal with her bending—if they don’t bleed out first, which can happen more quickly than one might expect. Needless to say, Katara’s glad she was around.

Zuko says the next like an oath. “The assassin is being dealt with.” With a confusing mix of shame, fear, and relief, she wonders how. Zuko’s not the type to execute, certainly not without trial, which is how things would have been done in the Fire Nation in days past. Mostly, she’s relieved for that, but still, she finds herself wondering whether she’ll regret being such a ready proponent of the right to trial and imprisonment over execution in the weeks to come. There is a swallow of fear in her throat, but it might wisp away once this isn’t all so fresh. 

But perhaps that’s something to think on later.

 “So are his benefactors,” Zuko spits out the word like it’s full of poison itself. “I’ve written to your father and Sokka and to Aang,” he adds. Katara’s stomach clenches unpleasantly in a way she suspects only has a little to do with the day’s events. Zuko doesn’t know she and Aang haven’t spoken in months, that they’re no longer together. “Spirits, Katara, I’m so sorry.”

Katara frowns as she leans back against the pillows. “What for? You didn’t poison me.”

“It was done on my watch, in my palace, because some group of fucking noblemen I’ve been trying to appease are—I keep trying and failing to make things better, and instead…”

“Zuko,” she glares at him in the hopes that it will quiet his self-recrimination. It does, quite efficiently, and she smiles. “Not everything gets to be your fault. Will you just accept my thanks for saving me instead?”

At this, she yawns, and she watches as his expression softens in the dim light of his bedroom.

Zuko rolls his eyes then, but there’s a faint smile playing on his lips, too, and she’s glad to feel the mood lighten again, though she can feel weariness starting to take her once more.

“That’s what you and I do,” he allows quietly after a moment, his (pretty, she thinks hazily, so pretty) amber eyes shining with the truth of what he’s saying. “We save each other. Get some more rest, Katara.” 

Still a little awake, but with her eyes closed, she asks drowsily, not even sure she manages the words, “Will you be here when I wake up?”

Zuko’s answer is quiet but certain. “Of course I will.”

Katara hums as she falls back into the allure of sleep, safe with the knowledge Zuko is watching over her. 

[dindjarin-mandalorian]

A Soft Place to Land (The Mandalorian - Din Djarin x OC) - Chapter Twenty-Seven

Author’s Note: Links to my Masterlist and AO3 can be found on the side of my blog if you're on desktop or at the top in my pinned post on desktop and mobile. :)

This fic begins several years before the events of Season One of The Mandalorian take place, but it’s now caught up to events of the first season. At this point in the story, Din and Lira have known each other for about thirteen years, and this chapter takes place immediately after the events of Chapter 8 of the show.

This is possibly the longest chapter yet - 10,000+ words! So it's a long one. :)

Warnings: I don’t think there should be any warnings for this chapter, but if I’ve missed something, please let me know!

Tagged: @nova646 @arduadastra @jynrumbly @jesfreedark @littlemisspascal (If you would like to be added to my tagged list, let me know in the comments or you can message me! And the same goes for if you'd like to be removed. 🙂)

_

Din woke before Lira the next morning, and for the briefest of moments, he feared he’d dreamed everything that happened with her the day before, that there was no way she had told him she loved him. But then he opened his eyes and saw her lying next to him, her arm draped over him, holding him close, and he knew it was true, though it was still hard to believe. He couldn’t stop the smile that appeared on his face as he watched her sleep.

Part of him wanted to wake her so he could talk to her, but the other part of him just wanted to stay in bed with her forever. He glanced up at the Child asleep in his hammock, grateful that he hadn’t woken yet, then breathed a soft sigh, content to stay right where he was.

He knew they had a lot to discuss, knew there was so much about the day before to process and work through, but there would be time for all of that later. Right now, he would let Lira sleep as long as she wanted. He refused to get out of bed, knowing that she would definitely wake if he did. His arm had found its way around her at some point while they slept and it pillowed her head now. It was numb, but he didn’t care.

He moved ever so slightly, just enough so that he was on his side facing her, his smile growing a little more at the sight of her. Her hair was a little mussed, her cheeks flushed red, her lips slightly parted, and he didn’t think he’d ever seen a more beautiful sight. He knew she would argue that fact, but it didn’t make it less true.

Lying so close to her, watching her sleep peacefully, he knew he would give anything to wake up next to her every single morning for the rest of his life, and he hated that he’d wasted so much time when he could have admitted his feelings years ago. If he’d known she felt the same, he might have found his courage sooner, but now that he looked back, it was obvious. He should have known, should have seen the signs.

He hadn’t let himself see them, not believing there was even a chance she could love someone like him, but now, with the knowledge that she did love him, he knew the signs had always been there. The lingering glances, the small smiles, the way she would bite her lip sometimes when he’d turn to look at her. The way she found any excuse to touch his arm, to stay next to him. The way she would laugh at something he’d said, her eyes alight, though he knew he wasn’t really that funny.

The soft way she said his name, the comfortable way she would lean into him, the way she would blush when he would compliment her about even the smallest thing. And there were probably a thousand other signs that he’d missed altogether, but he knew now, without a doubt, that she’d been telling the truth the night before.

She loved him.

His heart felt so full that he was afraid it would burst, and he wanted to kiss Lira so badly that it hurt. He silently cursed the helmet, the Creed, everything that was keeping him from waking her with a gentle kiss.

When he’d first sworn the Creed, he hadn’t imagined that there would ever come a day when there would be someone in his life he would want to remove the helmet for, someone he’d want to kiss, to share his life with. And though he’d often dreamed of kissing Lira, he hadn’t expected the feeling to be mutual, so he hadn’t put much thought into how he could kiss her and still keep the Creed. Now that he was faced with the possibility of kissing her - just the thought made his stomach flip - he knew he needed to figure out a plan of action.

To kiss her, the helmet would have to be removed - there was no way around it. Yet if he removed the helmet, she would see his face, and he might as well toss the helmet out of the ship’s airlock if that happened.

His eyes widened slightly, unable to believe he hadn’t thought of it before. Just because his helmet was off didn’t mean she would have to see his face. He thought she might not mind keeping her eyes closed, and he trusted her enough to believe she wouldn’t open them. He grimaced as the thought of a blindfold entered his mind. He didn’t want to do that, to resort to covering her eyes as though he didn’t trust her, to restrict her sight while he retained the ability to see her, but the more he thought about it, the more he thought it might be the only way.

He knew she wouldn’t intentionally open her eyes while his helmet was off, but things happened, and it would only take one slip up for him to break the Creed. He sighed, deciding he’d worry about it later. He needed to talk to Lira first, anyway. He’d see if she had any suggestions. Maybe they could work something out together.

Together. He still couldn’t believe the events of the night before. He’d known Lira for over thirteen years and had loved her for most of those, and now, finally, she knew how he felt about her. To say that it was a relief would be a massive understatement. He couldn’t wait for her to wake, for them to talk, to start the next phase of their life together.

Lira sighed softly and her eyes fluttered open, staring at his helmet for a moment before a faint blush colored her cheeks and she whispered, “Are you awake, Din?”

Din grinned. “Yeah.”

She bit her lip, a shy smile appearing on her face. “I couldn’t tell with the helmet. Have you - have you been awake long?”

“Not too long,” he answered quietly.

Lira nodded, embarrassed to have been the last to wake. What if she’d looked funny as she slept? What if she snored? Oh, stars, why couldn’t she have woken up first?

She was shaken from those thoughts by the realization that her legs were tangled with Din’s. She didn’t know when she’d rolled to face him, when she’d wrapped her arm around him, when they'd fitted their legs together, but she didn’t make a move to untangle herself from him.

“Did you sleep okay?” he asked, pulling her from her thoughts.

“I slept very well, thank you.” Her wink sent a shiver down Din’s spine. “Did you?”

“Yeah, better than I have in a long time.”

Lira grinned. “Any particular reason why?”

“Might have been because I was holding a beautiful woman in my arms.”

Lira laughed softly, her cheeks turning even pinker as her eyes dropped to his chest. “Smooth,” she said, looking back up at him with a soft smile.

“Thanks.”

She laughed again, then breathed a contented sigh. She began rubbing soft patterns along his back with her hand, wishing she could feel his skin, then scooted the last half-inch to close the distance between them. “This is nice,” she whispered.

“Yeah, it is.”

“I didn’t expect this to happen when I woke up yesterday morning.”

“Yeah, me neither.”

“Although, I hoped it would one day.”

“So did I.”

She slid her arm away from him, causing him to mourn the loss of contact until she reached behind her and pulled his hand from her own back, moving it in front of her. She brought his hand up to her lips, pressing a soft kiss to the back of it before clasping it with her own and holding it against her chest, moving her thumb gently against it.

He shivered slightly at her touch, hoping she wouldn’t notice. Lying so close to him, so attuned to him, she did notice, however, her smile growing at the realization.

“You have very nice hands.”

“Thank you.”

“I wish I could see more of you.” Her cheeks instantly reddened as she realized what she’d said. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean - I only meant - I just… I didn’t mean for that to sound as weird as it did.”

He smiled behind the helmet. “It’s okay, it didn’t sound weird.”

“Are you sure? It feels like it was weird.”

“Not weird at all.”

“Okay, good.”

“For what it’s worth, I wish that, too.”

She stared into his visor, wishing she could see his eyes, knowing it was impossible. She couldn’t even say, “Maybe one day,” because she didn’t think that day could ever possibly come if he remained a Mandalorian, and she knew she didn’t want to be the reason he gave that up.

She brought his hand up to kiss it again, then blushed once more as her barely-awake brain finally parsed what he’d said. Just because she couldn’t see his face didn’t mean she couldn’t see the rest of him. She bit her lip at just what that could possibly mean, trying to keep her face neutral.

Unfortunately for her, her thoughts were written all over her face. Din cleared his throat, wanting to pull the helmet off then and there so he could kiss her. He knew they still needed to talk before kissing entered the picture, but dank farrik, he wanted his lips on hers that instant. Wanted to kiss her neck, wanted to trail his kisses even lower.

He swallowed, glad he was wearing the helmet so she couldn’t read his thoughts on his face. Suddenly much too hot under the helmet, he wondered if Lira would be his cause of death. If being so near to her would one day make his heart explode.

It would, he reasoned, be a wonderful way to go, all things considered.

“What are you thinking about?” she asked.

He was tempted, briefly, to be completely honest, but then decided to keep his thoughts about kissing her to himself for the moment. “You.”

She smiled. “What about me?”

“How much I love you. How lucky I am to be holding you right now.”

“What a coincidence. I was just thinking the same thing about you.”

Din grinned. Part of him kept thinking it was all a mistake, a fluke, that she would change her mind, but then she would say something like that, and he’d realize all over again that it was true, that it was happening.

He remembered just how close he’d come to losing it all the day before, then remembered her burned arm. “How’s your arm today? Does it still hurt?”

She raised it experimentally, wincing as she brought it back down and draped it across his waist. “The burn is much better. Whatever you put on it last night worked wonders. The soreness from yesterday is still very much present, however. My whole body feels like it’s been trampled by a mudhorn.”

He reached his arm around her and began to rub her back in what he hoped were soothing circles to try to alleviate some of her soreness. “Yeah, I know how that feels.”

“Are you okay today? You got a little more beat up yesterday than I did.”

“I’m okay. A little sore, but nothing I can’t handle.”

“So tough,” she teased, gently squeezing his waist. “It’s okay if you’re not okay, you know. I won’t think less of you if you admit you’re sore.”

“I know.”

“And?”

“And I’m really sore.”

Lira laughed softly. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“You’re already helping.”

“I’m not doing anything.”

“Yeah, you are.”

Her smile softened at his tone. “Well, I wish I could do more.”

He leaned forward a little, just enough to gently press his helmet against her forehead. “This is enough.”

She closed her eyes as she hummed happily.

“What are we going to do today?” she asked quietly.

“We can’t just lie here all day?”

She smiled and looked at him again. “That would be nice, wouldn’t it? I don’t think the little one would appreciate that, though. I’m surprised he’s still asleep, honestly.”

They glanced up, both stifling laughter as they realized the Child was awake and staring down at them.

When he noticed that they’d spotted him, he climbed out of the hammock, swinging from the edge for a moment before dropping onto Din’s leg and sitting up, cocking his head to the side as he stared at the two of them lying in the small bed.

Lira wondered, briefly, just how long he’d been awake, then realized it didn’t matter. She smiled as she watched him tug on Din’s arm.

“You ready to get up, kid?” Din asked.

She melted at the gentle way Din pulled his hand from hers and patted the Child’s back.

Din suddenly realized that getting out of the small bed was going to be more of a challenge than getting into it, given the way his legs were tangled with Lira’s.

“Okay, kid, you’re gonna have to get out first.”

Lira laughed as she recognized Din’s dilemma. “How are we going to manage this?”

Din shrugged. “Guess you’ll have to climb over me again.”

She flushed, biting back a teasing smile. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

“Yes,” he answered immediately, then sucked in a breath, wondering if he’d ever stop embarrassing himself in front of her. “I mean, I wouldn’t not like it. I didn’t - I don’t - I don’t mind.”

Lira’s smile grew wider as she listened to him stutter. Din being nervous and shy instead of confident and sure made butterflies flutter around her stomach, and she wasn’t sure what it said about her that she liked the fact that she made him nervous.

The little one saved her from having to reply, however, by squealing loudly at the pair of them after he’d dropped from the bed to the floor.

She laughed. “We’re coming, little one! You’ll have to be patient while we figure this out.”

She grinned at Din, her cheeks still a bright red as she struggled to sit up and disentangle her legs from his. “We’re really going to have to figure out new sleeping arrangements. Not that I don’t like sleeping so close to you - quite the opposite, actually - but this is really unnecessary. What if there’s an emergency and we have to get up really fast? Someone is going to hit the ground hard if that happens, and it will probably be me.”

Din laughed, grateful that she hadn’t said anything about his awkwardness. “I wouldn’t let you fall. But you’re right, I’ll try to figure something out.”

She finally attempted to climb out of the closet, moving so that her arms were on either side of him as she held herself above his prone body, her knees on either side of one of his thighs, pausing to say, “Although I would happily sleep in this sardine can with you forever if that’s the only way I could be close to you.”

Din swallowed, one arm still outstretched, numb, the other moving to her hip of its own accord, wanting to pull her down on top of him. His thumb slid beneath her shirt, skating softly against her bare skin. She gasped at the sensation, closing her eyes as he continued to caress her.

The Child babbled from behind her and her eyes popped open, startled at just how quickly she’d forgotten the world around her with Din’s hand on her bare skin. As much as she hated to move, she knew she had no choice.

“He’s not very patient this morning, is he?” she asked, her voice slightly shaky.

Din shook his head, his own voice raspy when he finally answered. “No, he’s not.”

“I guess that just means you’ll have to be the patient one,” she said, finally sliding off of him and out of the closet.

“Patient for what?” he managed to ask as he sat up.

She tossed a wink at him over her shoulder before scooping up the little one. “You’ll see.”

Din didn’t think he had enough patience to wait for whatever she had in mind, but stars he hoped that whatever she had in mind aligned with what he was thinking. He slid out of bed and followed her as she made her way to the cockpit, waiting at the bottom of the ladder as she climbed up.

Her voice floated down to him. “We’re still in hyperspace.”

“Dank farrik.” He’d forgotten all about putting the Razor Crest into hyperspace the night before, his thoughts completely consumed by exhaustion and Lira.

He hurried up the ladder and dropped into the pilot’s seat, checking the navs.

“Where are we?” Lira asked.

He breathed a sigh of relief. “Somewhere safe.”

“Oh, good! So we’re fine?”

“Yeah. Probably shouldn’t have left the ship in hyperspace for so long, though.”

Lira wrinkled her nose. “Yeah, it does sound kinda… tired.”

Din laughed softly. “It does. I’ll find somewhere for us to land and we’ll let it rest.”

“Good idea. Maybe somewhere with good food? I’m starving.”

He hadn’t realized it until she mentioned food, but he could definitely eat. “Yeah, me too. I’ll see what I can do.”

Even though he knew it wasn’t a good idea to leave the Razor Crest in hyperspace for so long, he was grateful that it put a fair bit of distance between themselves and Nevarro. And, if someone was still looking for them, the chances of anyone finding them immediately were slim, and that thought relaxed him enough to land the ship near a market with an open-air tavern.

Once they were settled and Din had ordered their food, as well as scanned the room for any threats, he realized Lira was staring at him.

“What?”

“We should go back to the ship to eat.”

“Why? What’s wrong?” He looked around again, thinking he’d missed something the first time.

“Because you’re hungry.”

“Because I’m - what?”

“Because you’re hungry, too, and if the little one and I eat here, you’ll have to wait even longer before you can eat. Because of the helmet, you know.”

“I -”

He wasn’t even sure what to say. It wasn’t even the first time she’d been so considerate of him and his helmet, but the fact was that it still took him by surprise every single time. He was used to not being able to eat immediately, used to his food being cold by the time he was able to finally remove the helmet to eat it.

“It’s okay,” he finally said. “I don’t mind.”

“Well, I do.”

“It doesn’t matter, Lira. You two can eat, and then I’ll eat once we’re back to the ship.”

“No.”

He wasn’t sure why she was so adamant about it, and he stared at her, his head tilted to the side. “I really don’t mind -”

“I don’t eat until you eat.” She reached out and laced her fingers with his. “Okay?”

He had the feeling that she meant more by her words than just wanting him to eat. It felt heavier than her just being polite about waiting until he could eat his meal before she ate her own. There was a subtle shift in their relationship, and he knew it had to do with the fact that they’d admitted their feelings for one another the night before. Maybe this was what it was like to have a true partner in life.

Finally, he nodded. “Okay.”

Her smile lit up her face as she squeezed his hand. “Okay.”

When the waitress returned with their food, they made their way back to the ship, Lira feeding little bites to the little one as they walked.

She nudged Din’s arm with her elbow, smirking up at him. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed that you’re wearing the jetpack.”

He tilted his head at her. “Didn’t want to lose it.”

“Pfft - didn’t want to lose it. Where’s it going on the ship, Din? You know what the Armorer said. It won’t work properly for you until you take some time and get to know it.”

“I know. I’m not going to use it yet.”

She raised a brow. “Mmhmm. Okay.” She fed another bite of food to the little one, then added, “Although, I really like the way you wear your cloak with the jetpack.”

“You do, huh?”

Her face flushed slightly, though she didn’t look away from him. “Yeah, it looks… nice.”

“Thanks.”

“Even if it does seem sort of dangerous to have any kind of material flowing behind you when you’re using the jetpack.”

“It won’t catch fire.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

“Okay, as long as you’re sure, Mr. Flame-Resistant-Cloak.”

He laughed. “I am.”

“I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

Her voice was soft and she sounded close to tears, which was a complete turnaround from her previous statement, so Din slowed to a stop and turned to look at her. “Are you okay?”

She nodded, hastily brushing a tear away with her free hand. “Ugh, yeah, sorry. I’m fine.”

“You sure?”

She nodded again, then dropped her head to hide her eyes from him. “I just… you scared me yesterday, Din.” She swiped at her tears again. “I don’t want to lose you.”

Din reached out and placed a finger under her chin, gently lifting her head until her eyes met his visor. “I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t want you to apologize, Din, I just -”

“I know, but I’m still sorry. I led you into that yesterday. I knew it might be dangerous, but I didn’t expect it to be that bad. I know it scared you, and the last thing you should feel is scared. I want… I want you to feel safe when I’m around.”

“I do, Din. I do feel safe with you. But I thought you were dead. When I thought I’d lost you, I barely even registered the fact that I was in danger.” She bit her lip and looked away for a moment before turning back to him. “I didn’t even care,” she whispered. “I didn’t even care that I was in danger. If it hadn’t been for the little one… I probably would have gone back and joined you.”

“Don’t say that, Lira.”

“But it’s true.” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I don’t want to live without you, and I know me saying that is probably a lot, and probably sounds really dramatic, but… I can’t imagine my life without you now, Din.”

He reached out and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear, then gently stroked her cheek. “I can’t imagine my life without you, either.”

She crinkled her nose and Din smiled at the familiar sight of her trying not to cry. “Come on,” he said softly, “let’s get back to the ship and eat, and then I think you and I need to talk a little more.”

“Yeah, I think we do.”

They started walking toward the Razor Crest again, and Din slid his arm around her waist, holding her close to his side as she rested her head against him.

When they reached the ship, Lira nodded her head at the ladder to the cockpit. “You can go up and eat. We’ll eat down here and then join you once you’re finished.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

She shrugged a shoulder lightly. “It’s no big deal. We’re fine down here, aren’t we, little one?” The Child squealed in answer, and Lira grinned at Din. “See? We’re good.”

“No, I mean you don’t have to.”

Lira’s brows drew together in confusion. “What?”

“I got soup so I can just… lift the helmet enough to drink it. You won’t see my face. It’ll be fine.”

Her nose wrinkled. “You’re going to drink your soup?”

“I mean… yeah.”

“It would be easier to use a spoon, you know.”

“Maybe, but I want to eat with you and the kid.”

“And you’re sure it’s okay?”

“Yeah.”

He knew it was toeing the line to lift the helmet even the small amount to sip his soup, but he didn’t care. He was tired of eating alone, tired of Lira and the kid having to leave the room while he did something as basic as eating. If he and Lira were truly going to start a relationship, he knew some things would have to change, and he might as well start with something small.

“Yeah,” he repeated. “It’s fine.”

A small smile appeared on her face. “Okay, if you’re sure then we would love to eat with you.”

“I’m sure.”

Her smile grew and she nodded. “Okay.”

Once they settled into the cockpit with their food, Din smiled at the sight of Lira resolutely keeping her eyes away from him as he lifted the helmet enough to sip his soup.

“You don’t have to stare at your food, you know,” he told her. “You can look around.”

“I just don’t want to accidentally see your face!”

“You won’t. I’m not lifting it that much.”

“But still.” She gently lifted the Child from her lap when she realized he was trying to look under the helmet, and turned him so that he was seated facing away from Din. “No peeking, little one.”

Din’s grin grew even more. “It really is okay, Lira. I wouldn’t have suggested this if it was a problem.”

“I know! I know. I just… don’t want to forget and then look at you and then boom - you’re not a Mandalorian anymore.”

He knew that if anything put him in danger of breaking the Creed, it was him not being able to keep himself from kissing her and not because she saw his chin while he ate, but he appreciated the fact that she took his Creed so seriously.

Wanting to reassure her, he carefully set his bowl of soup on the console before holding out his hand to her. “Look at me, Lira.”

She continued to stare resolutely at her food. “The helmet’s on, right?”

Din chuckled softly. “Yeah, it’s on.”

She slid her hand into his and then finally looked up at him. “Hi,” she said softly.

“Hi.”

Her smile sent a jolt through his stomach, and he swallowed as he searched for the right words to say even though he knew it was futile. He could never seem to find the right words when he was in her presence. He had to try, though.

“I appreciate you being so careful about not seeing my face, Lira. I know it’s hard to deal with all this,” he motioned to his helmet with his free hand before adding, “I know it isn’t ideal.”

Her smile softened. “It’s not too bad.”

“I just - I hope you know what it means to me. That - that you see me even though you can’t… see me.” He grimaced behind the helmet. “Sorry, that’s - that’s really…” he trailed off, no longer sure what he was even trying to say. “Sorry.”

She rubbed his gloved hand with her thumb as she continued to smile at him. “You don’t have to apologize. I know what you mean.”

He wasn’t even sure he knew what he meant, but he was grateful that she wasn’t calling him an idiot.

“I just wanted to tell you that it’s okay for you to look in my direction while we eat, that’s all.”

She squeezed his hand as she nodded. “Okay. I just worry.”

“I know.”

“I don’t want to make you break the Creed.”

“I know,” he repeated. “You won’t.”

She nodded again, smiling as she released his hand and picked up her fork again. “This is nice, though. Eating in the same room.”

He grinned to himself as he realized she was at least looking in his general direction now, even though she still wasn’t looking at anything close to his helmet or face. “It is.”

They continued to talk while they ate, Lira finally relaxing enough to enjoy her meal and his company without worrying about accidentally looking at his face. Her food was long gone by the time the little one began to yawn and rub his eyes. She didn’t know how much time had passed while she and Din had talked, and she didn’t want the moment to end. They’d skated around the topic of their new relationship, choosing instead to talk about lighter, less important things, but she knew they needed to discuss it eventually. She also knew, however, that the little one needed a nap.

“I think the little one and I are going to go below for a little bit.”

Din nodded, understanding exactly why she wasn’t mentioning the fact that the kid was sleepy. “All right.”

She set her empty bowl aside, then stood, settling the little one on her hip and reaching out to squeeze Din’s shoulder as she passed him. “I’ll be back soon, and then maybe we can talk a little more.”

Her shy smile made him want to take her in his arms, but he knew the kid needed to go to sleep, and if he ever got Lira in his arms, he wouldn’t want to let her go. “Sounds good.”

He turned in his seat to watch her go, then cleaned up their empty dishes to pass the time while he waited for her to come back. After what seemed like several hours but was actually only about thirty minutes, he heard her climbing back up to the cockpit.

She sank into the co-pilot’s chair with a soft sigh and smiled at him. “Didn’t think he was ever going to fall asleep.”

“I was beginning to wonder.”

She laughed quietly. “I almost fell asleep waiting for him to fall asleep.”

Din chuckled. “I’m glad you didn’t.”

She tilted her head and winked at him. “Would you have missed me?”

“Yes.”

Her smile softened at the tone of his voice. “Well, I would have hated to miss this conversation so there’s no way I would have allowed myself to fall asleep.”

“I’m glad.”

She bit her lip, then said, “Soooo… where do we start?”

Din hesitated for a moment. “I don’t know.”

Lira wasn’t at all surprised that Din wasn’t going to be the one to open up first, and though she wasn’t sure what the best way to start this particular conversation would be, she decided to just jump right in with the most important part. “Well, can I say that I’m beyond happy about what happened last night?”

“Which part?”

Lira laughed. “‘Which part?’ The part where we said we loved each other.”

“Oh, yeah, that part was definitely the highlight of the day.”

“It was, wasn’t it?”

“Although the part after was pretty nice, too.”

“The part where we slept squeezed into your sardine can of a bed together?”

Din chuckled again. “Yeah, that part.”

Lira grinned. “I liked that part, too.”

“I know I should try to figure something out about the sleeping arrangements before we go to bed tonight, but part of me doesn’t mind sleeping so close to you.”

She flushed lightly. “I didn’t really mind it, either.”

Even though Din knew that they’d admitted their feelings for one another the night before, as well as slept in each other’s arms, he still couldn’t believe that they were having this particular conversation, that she was happy to be having the conversation with him. It was almost too hard to fathom the fact that she wanted him.

“I still can’t believe this is happening.”

“Me, neither,” she replied. “After thirteen years, I was about to accept the fact that you didn’t feel the same as I did. I almost… I almost quit going with you on bounty hunts a few years ago because it hurt so much, but then I realized I’d rather have you as a friend than not have you at all.”

That would have been heartbreaking, Din realized. If she’d given up on him before he’d worked up the courage to tell her he loved her… it didn’t even bear thinking about. The fact that he’d almost let it happen by being too afraid to say anything gnawed at him. He didn’t even want to consider the alternative.

“I’m glad you didn’t.”

“Me, too.”

“And I’m sorry it hurt you.”

She shook her head slowly. “There’s no need to apologize. I could have said something, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to mess up what we already had.”

“I know what you mean. I didn’t think there was even a chance that you felt the same and I didn’t want to risk our friendship.”

She smiled at him. “We’re such idiots.”

Din laughed. “You’re not an idiot.”

“That’s debatable.” She laughed softly, then gazed at his helmet for a few moments before she blushed and glanced away, lightly clearing her throat. “Now, where were we? Oh, yeah! Talking about our favorite parts of last night. Oh, and agreeing that the sardine can is fine for sleeping… for now.”

“At least until you get tired of sleeping so close to me.”

“I’m never going to get tired of that, Din Djarin.”

“You say that now, but when your leg starts to cramp or your arm goes numb and you can’t roll over, you might change your mind.”

“Nope, not going to change my mind. Not even leg cramps could make me want to stop sleeping so close to you.”

Din couldn’t wipe the grin off his face. “Not even leg cramps, huh?”

“Nope.”

“Good to know.”

“Do you want to figure out new sleeping arrangements? Because it’s okay if you do,” she added in a rush.

“No! No, I definitely don’t have a problem with sleeping so close to you.”

“Even if your leg cramps or your arm falls asleep?”

“My arm fell asleep last night and it definitely didn’t make me want to stop sleeping with you.”

Din chuckled at the look of consternation on her face. “Your arm fell asleep? Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“It wasn’t that big of a deal. You were sleeping peacefully and I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“Yeah, but your arm was asleep. That couldn’t have been comfortable.”

“It was totally numb, it wasn’t bothering me.”

Lira sputtered out a laugh. “But still.”

“How about this? I promise if I’m ever uncomfortable, I’ll wake you up.”

“Sounds good.” She continued to smile at him for a moment before adding in a softer voice. “Should we talk about the more serious stuff now?”

Din sighed. “Which serious stuff?”

“You almost died yesterday, Din,” she said quietly. “Do you need to talk about that?”

“I’m okay.”

“I know you’re okay, but are you okay?” She reached out and covered his hand with hers. “Really okay?”

He stared at her hand on his for a moment before slowly answering her. “Yeah, I mean - yeah. I’ve been in dangerous situations before. It’s not something that’s new to me.”

“Yeah, but… have you ever been that close to death?”

“Probably. Probably been that close to death more times than I’ve even realized, honestly.”

She squeezed his hand. “You sound so nonchalant about it.”

He shrugged a shoulder almost imperceptibly. “It’s not that I’m nonchalant about it or that I don’t care, it’s just - I’ve lived with the knowledge that I could die at any moment, during any given battle, on any given day for years. I’m not invincible. I’m a Mandalorian, a bounty hunter. Fighting has been my life for almost as long as I can remember. It’s who I am, Lira. I don’t want to die, but I’ve had to accept that it’s going to happen one day. Yesterday was just a little closer to it than most days.”

Lira swiped a tear from her cheek with her free hand. “I don’t like the thought of you dying. And when I thought you were going to yesterday? I almost couldn’t go on. I wouldn’t have been able to go on if it hadn’t been for Cara and Greef. I just - it’s hard for me to come to terms with that part of you.”

“I know. I wish it didn’t have to be that way, but it comes with the territory when you’re a Mandalorian. Even if I stopped the bounty hunting, I can’t change being a Mandalorian. Wearing this armor, it attracts danger. People see it and they want to take their chances. They want to be the one to beat a Mandalorian, they want to be able to brag about it.”

She flashed him a small smile through her tears. “I bet it rarely goes their way.”

He chuckled softly. “Never.”

She sighed, then said, “I know what being a Mandalorian and bounty hunter means. I’ve been hanging around you for over thirteen years, so I know. But you always seemed so powerful, so capable, like you could never be beaten, and yesterday just proved that you can be hurt, and I don’t like that. I wish I could protect you and keep you safe from everything, but I know I can’t.”

“You’re right, you can’t.” He turned his palm up and laced his fingers with hers. “Is this a deal-breaker? Me being a Mandalorian, always living with danger around every corner - is it too much?”

She squeezed his hand and shook her head. “No. No. It’s not a deal-breaker at all. I don’t want to see you hurt, and I’ll always worry about you, but no, it’s not a deal-breaker. I love you, and it’s going to take more than a little danger to make me leave you.”

Din released the breath he’d been holding as she spoke. “I was hoping you’d say that.”

“And,” she hesitated, biting her lip before continuing, “do you want to talk about IG-11? How - how did he save you?”

He sighed, swallowing in an attempt to keep his tears from falling. “He, uh, used bacta spray on my injury.”

She raised a brow, her eyes widening slightly in sudden realization. “Your injury - it was… it was on the back of your head, right? The blood… there was so much blood on Cara’s hand.”

“Yeah, that was the worst of it.”

“So if he used the bacta spray on your head…”

“He removed the helmet.”

She gasped and squeezed his hand again. “But he’s a droid, so -”

“So it doesn’t count.” Even as he said the words, they felt wrong, so he tried again. “I mean, it did count. It does. It just - it doesn’t mean I can’t put the helmet on again. He isn’t - he wasn’t a living thing so I didn’t break the Creed.”

Lira breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh, good.” She shook her head sadly, then added, “Are you okay with that? Even if he was a droid, he was still the first to see you without it in so many years. And then he sacrificed himself for you and the little one. That’s a lot to cope with - are you sure you’re okay? And then - oh stars, and Kuiil. He was your friend, too. I’m sorry you lost so much yesterday.”

Din hadn’t let himself dwell on what he’d lost the day before, on how much more he’d almost lost - he’d only allowed himself to focus on the good parts - on Lira telling him she loved him, holding him in her arms as she slept. But he knew he needed to deal with the bad parts, too. He just didn’t want to do it yet.

“Thank you,” he finally said. “I’m okay, though.” She raised a brow and he laughed softly. “All right, I will be okay. I’ve lost a lot of people in my life and it never gets any easier. Kuiil and IG-11 both sacrificed themselves for me and the kid, and there’s nothing I can do to bring them back. All I can do is try to honor their sacrifices the best way I can.”

She smiled sadly and nodded at him. “You’re right.”

Din cleared his throat. “Can we talk about the good stuff again?”

Her smile grew a little bigger and she laughed softly. “Which good stuff?”

“The stuff that involves me and you.”

He tugged on her hand very gently, wanting to close the distance between them, wanting her closer, but letting her make the decision of whether or not she wanted to move closer to him. She stared down at their clasped hands for a moment before biting her lip and lifting her eyes to meet his gaze again.

Without releasing his hand, she stood and took a step closer to him, and another, until she was standing right at his knees. She arched a brow in question, and he pulled her down onto his lap without speaking. She immediately wrapped her arms around his neck and he enveloped her in his own arms.

Lira thought she might pass out from the sheer delirious happiness she felt. She couldn’t believe they’d talked, that they’d finally admitted to having feelings for each other, that she was sitting on his lap, wrapped in his arms.

It felt like a dream, but there was no denying the solid feeling of him in her arms. She felt Din slide his hands up her back and she shivered, though his hands were gloved and above her shirt and jacket. He wasn’t touching her bare skin at all, and yet it felt like his touch was branding her all the same.

She sighed softly and tightened her hold on him, never wanting to let him go.

Din’s modulated voice was quiet when he spoke again. “Do you know how long I’ve dreamed of doing this?”

Lira smiled. “How long?” she whispered.

“Almost as long as I’ve known you.”

She pulled back enough so that she could see his helmet. “Really? That long?”

He hesitated for a moment before answering her. “Yes.”

“But you never… you never acted like you were thinking about… about me like that.”

He shook his head at himself. “I didn’t think you felt the same so I didn’t want to make things weird between us. I didn’t - I didn’t think I deserved to tell you something like that when there was no way you could be happy with me.”

She stared at his helmet’s visor for a moment, her brows drawn together. “You know that’s not true, right? Stars, Din, why wouldn’t I be happy with you?”

“I just thought - I don’t know. I thought that what I did for a living would scare you away. I’ve had to kill people. You’ve seen me kill people. At first, I didn’t even think you’d want to be friends, I just thought you tagged along with me for the same reasons you went with all the other bounty hunters. It was just another job for you. I was just another job for you.”

“You have never been just another job for me, Din.”

“Never?”

“Okay, maybe the first time was just another job.”

He laughed softly. “I didn’t even want you to go with me that first time.”

Lira smirked. “Oh, believe me, I haven’t forgotten that.”

“So the second time wasn’t just another job?”

Her smirk grew a little more. “No, not really.”

“Why not?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know. There was just something about you. I was intrigued.”

“Intrigued?”

“Yes. And, honestly, part of it was that I knew you didn’t really want me going with you and I was determined not to back down just because you were a tough Mandalorian.”

“So the only reason you kept going with me was because you were being stubborn and wanted to put a Mandalorian in his place?”

“Basically, yes.”

“I’m glad you’re so stubborn then.”

Lira laughed. “Yeah, me too.”

“When - when did you realize?”

Lira’s smile softened at the hesitant way he asked the question, as though he still wasn’t quite sure it was true.

“When did I realize I loved you?”

“Yes.”

She bit the inside of her lip as she considered. “There were so many small moments when I think I knew but didn’t even want to admit it to myself because I thought it was pointless, but I think the first time I started to really realize it was after you saved me from the sand wastes. The next time I saw Greef, he told me how much the puck he offered you was worth, and he couldn’t believe you’d turn down something that was worth that much. He said you would have been set for years, Din. He didn’t know why you left so suddenly, but I did. I knew it was because of me.”

She glanced down then back up at his helmet with tears in her eyes, whispering, “I knew you gave up those credits so you could save me.” She brushed a tear away with her hand, then laughed very softly again before continuing, “And then every moment after that just made me fall more in love with you.” She huffed a soft laugh. “Stars, even this moment has made me fall more in love with you. I don’t - I don’t know how I can keep falling more in love with you when I’m already so in love with you, Din.”

He tightened his grip on her waist. It was almost too much, almost overwhelming. Sitting with her on his lap, his arms around her, listening to her tell him just how much she loved him - dank farrik, it was like a dream come true. Something he’d never even allowed himself to imagine because it seemed so far out of reach.

And yet.

“When did you realize?” she asked softly.

He was silent as he thought back to a moment not long after they’d met. “It was… it was after we’d captured one of the bounty targets and were on our way back to Nevarro. It had been a pretty rough day. I’d had… I’d had to be - it was more violent than it usually was.” He swallowed and shook his head. “I hadn’t wanted you to see me that way, and that was when I’d first wondered why. I was used to that being how most people saw me. People saw the armor, they heard the word Mandalorian - they usually came to the same conclusion. Violent, dangerous, a killer. It never really bothered me. And then that day, it did.”

“Oh, Din,” she said softly, lifting a hand to place it gently on the side of his helmet.

“So while I was still grappling with the reason why I didn’t want you to only see me as a dangerous Mandalorian, we got back to the ship and I got us in the air. It was quiet, we weren’t talking. And then I felt - I felt your hand on my arm. I - it was so gentle. I wasn’t - I wasn’t used to anyone being gentle with me.”

Lira’s eyes filled with tears, but she didn’t interrupt him.

“And you asked if I was okay. That was all. ‘Are you okay?’ And that was when I first started to realize, even though it still took me a long time to really admit it.” He stared into her eyes, wishing she could look into his own. “And you still are, Lira. You’re still so gentle with me. It’s - I will never get tired of that. Gentleness isn’t something that any Mandalorian gets to experience often.”

“You deserve all the gentleness in the world, Din.”

She leaned into him again, wrapping her arms around his neck once more.

Din took another moment to savor the feeling of her in his arms, then said, “There’s something else I wanted to talk to you about.”

She leaned back again and smiled. “What is it?”

“Yesterday, when we were talking to the Armorer, she named the kid and me a clan of two.”

Lira’s smile grew a little wider. “She did.”

“I don’t take that lightly.”

“I know you don’t. You’re going to be a great father, by the way. The little one already adores you. And I know this is just until you can find the little one’s people, but there’s already a bond between you. It’s really sweet to watch the two of you together.”

“Yeah, he’s great,” he said, still surprised at how much he already cared for the little womp rat.

“Oh, sorry, I interrupted you - what were you saying about it?”

Din knew that they’d admitted their feelings, knew that the chances of him messing things up by what he was about to say were slim, and yet he found he was nervous to say the words. He cleared his throat, buying a few more seconds of time.

“It meant a lot to finally earn a signet, to finally have a clan, but I don’t want it to just be a clan of two. You’re as much my family as the kid is, Lira.” He stared at her for a moment, working up the courage to keep talking. “We’ve been friends for a long time.”

Lira smiled even as her tears threatened to fall. “We have.”

“And I’ve wanted to be more than friends for… a while. I may not have said anything to you, but… I’ve considered you my family for years. I’d be honored if you’d be a part of my clan. Officially.”

Lira bit her lip to try to keep the tears at bay, but it was useless. “I would love to be a part of your clan, Din. It means the world to me that you would want me.”

Din leaned his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. “There’s no one else I’d rather have by my side.”

“And there’s nowhere else I’d rather be,” Lira whispered.

They sat in silence for a few moments, foreheads pressed together, holding each other as though they’d never let go, as they let their words settle into truth, as they both absorbed what the moment truly meant.

A clan. A family.

It was what they’d both been longing to have for so long, and now it was theirs.

When Lira finally sat back to look at him, there was a shy smile on her face and a light blush across her cheeks. Things had changed between them, even more than they had the night before when they’d said they loved each other. One might argue that those words and feelings of the night before could have been borne of adrenaline and a brush with death, a moment of passion.

But this - the quiet confession, the weighted question, the soft Keldabe kiss - it was real, and there was no denying the seriousness of it, the mutual relief that the words had finally been said aloud and that those words had been received in the way they’d both been too scared to even dream about.

Lira pulled Din in for another hug, slowly coming to terms with the fact that she could do that now. She could hug him, she could hold him, she could whisper she loved him whenever she wanted. It was a dream made real, and all she’d ever longed for.

Well, not quite all.

“You know,” she murmured against his shoulder. “If you weren’t wearing this helmet, I would kiss you right now.”

Din’s grip tightened around her. “Is that right?”

“Mmhmm.”

His modulated voice was low and it sent a shiver through her. “Is that a promise?”

“It is.”

“I may have been thinking of ways to do that this morning before you woke up.”

Lira grinned as she pulled back to stare at his helmet. “Oh, really, Din Djarin? You were thinking about kissing me?”

“I’m always thinking about kissing you.”

She bit her lip as her cheeks flushed a deeper red. “Did you come up with a way?”

“Maybe. I mean, it isn’t ideal, it isn’t perfect. It - you may not like it.”

“Try me.”

He hesitated before he said the words, still wishing there was a better way. “I thought you might be able to wear a blindfold.”

Both brows shot up at his words. “A blindfold?”

“If you don’t want to, I understand,” he said in a rush. “I shouldn’t have even mentioned it. Forget I said anything.”

Lira sat up a little straighter, and Din loosened his hold on her, thinking she meant to stand, to get away from him. He knew he should have kept those particular thoughts to himself.

“Sorry,” he added, removing his hands from her completely.

He couldn’t even bring himself to look at her face. Embarrassment flooded him completely, and he was afraid that this would finally be the moment he overheated under the helmet and passed out.

“Don’t be sorry, it’s a good idea!”

The tone of her voice gave Din the courage to meet her eyes again. “It is?”

“Yes! I mean, it might feel a little weird at first, but it’s a good idea. I would definitely wear a blindfold to kiss you.”

“You’re sure? I don’t want you to be uncomfortable or -”

“I want to wear it. I’d do anything to kiss you right now, Din.”

Relief washed over him, and he wrapped his arms around her again as he raised a brow. “Anything?”

She flashed him a teasing grin. “Anything.”

His breathing grew heavier and he nodded. “All you’d have to do is wear the blindfold. I wish - I wish you didn’t have to, but -”

“The Creed, I know. I understand.”

“Are you sure this is something you’re prepared to deal with? Still not seeing my face even if -”

He paused, and Lira raised a brow. “Even if what?”

“Even if we’re together.”

Her smile was bright as she stared at his visor. “Together. I like the sound of that.”

“Me, too.”

“And yes, I’m prepared for that. I’ve known you for over thirteen years, so I know you can’t take off the helmet in front of me. That doesn’t come as a surprise. I mean, I didn’t expect that to change just because we’re together.” She smiled at him again. “I’m prepared to deal with that, and with this -” She tapped the side of his helmet gently. “You’re worth dealing with anything, Din,” she added in a whisper.

Din sighed softly. “I love you, Lira.”

“And I love you. Now, about this blindfold… I think we should try to find one soon.”

Din’s face burned beneath the helmet. “Would it be weird if I said I already have one?”

She laughed, a light blush blooming on her cheeks. “Not weird at all.”

“In that case, I already have one.”

She grinned. “You know, it’s actually very flattering that you want to kiss me so badly that you’ve been carrying around a blindfold all day in the hopes of getting me to wear it.”

“I thought you might be offended by the idea.”

“I think you’re underestimating just how much I want to kiss you.”

“You’re sure you’re okay with it? I promise it’s fine if you’re not, we’ll think of something else.”

“I’m sure. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to see your face, but since that’s impossible, I will gladly wear a blindfold if it allows me to kiss you.”

“I don’t deserve you.”

“Shhh,” she said softly. “Don’t say that.”

“But -”

“Nope.” She placed a finger on his helmet where his mouth would be, causing him to grin. “Now, let’s see that blindfold.”

“Now?”

“No, next week. Yes, now. Or was this conversation not about you wanting to kiss me?”

“That’s definitely what it was about.”

“Then let’s see it.”

He laughed as more relief coursed through his body. “Yes, ma’am.”

She grinned as he pulled a black piece of cloth out of his pocket and held it up for her inspection. “Okay, so you weren’t lying about carrying around a blindfold.”

“Nope.”

She took it from him and ran it through her hands, her heart swelling with love as she realized that he must have chosen the soft material intentionally.

“Do you want to test it out now?” she asked shyly.

“Yes.”

His voice was low and rough, and Lira felt her face flame as she handed the piece of cloth back to him. “Will you?”

He nodded and brushed a stray strand of hair away from her eyes, lingering with his thumb on her cheek before lifting the cloth and wrapping it snugly around her head.

“Can you see anything?” he asked.

She shook her head. “No, nothing.”

Din turned to make sure the Child hadn’t snuck back into the cockpit undetected while they’d talked, then turned back to Lira. Lira, who was sitting so sweetly on his lap, waiting so patiently, so trustingly, that it almost shattered him. She’d allowed herself to be blindfolded, willing to let him deprive her of one of her senses just to kiss him. No matter what she said, he didn’t deserve her.

He lifted his hands and pulled his helmet off, a slight tremble moving through him as he set it aside and gazed at her face for the first time without it being through the helmet’s visor. He realized at that moment just how much he trusted her. He trusted her with everything, not least of which was the fact that he’d removed his helmet in front of her knowing she wouldn’t remove the blindfold no matter what.

The moment felt sacred, like he needed to tread reverently. He pulled off his gloves, slowly, and dropped them on the console behind Lira. She tilted her head at the movement but didn’t speak. Like him, it seemed she felt the weight of the moment.

He didn’t want to startle her, so he whispered, “I’m going to touch your face now.”

When she nodded, he cupped her cheek, running his thumb along it gently.

She gasped at his touch. “You’re not wearing your gloves.”

“I’m not.”

“Scandalous.” She said as she smiled and lifted her hand to his, moving it to her lips and pressing a slow kiss to his palm.

Din swallowed, then raised his other hand to cradle her head, pulling her forward gently. “Can I kiss you now?”

“Yes,” she whispered.

That was all she had time to say before Din’s lips were on hers and he was kissing her as if she was the salvation he needed, the very essence of life he required to survive. A heartbeat later, her arms were wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer, and she closed her eyes tight as she felt his own arms wrap around her waist as if he’d never let her go. He held her in his arms so tightly that it was as if he was afraid she would disappear if he loosened his hold even a little. As if she was the only thing tethering him to life.

She felt the slightest tremble of his lips against hers before he deepened the kiss and she lost herself in the sensation of it, of the feeling of his lips on hers, his arms wrapped tight around her body. She wanted to be closer, needed to be closer, but for now, it was enough to kiss him.

Some part of her mind was stuck on the fact that he’d removed his helmet, and even though she was wearing the blindfold, she couldn’t shake the thought that he wasn’t wearing his helmet, but the rest of her didn’t care about that at the moment. She wanted to keep breathing him in, she wanted to lose herself completely in him.

The day before, she’d thought she’d lost him forever, and now he was kissing her as if his life depended on it, as if he loved her as much as she loved him. The thought bloomed through her like a supernova, and she was afraid she was going to combust at any moment. Instead of stopping, however, she kissed him even more fervently.

For the span of a millisecond, Din had been afraid he’d made a mistake by suggesting the blindfold, by even considering asking her to do something like that, but then she’d returned his kiss and he was lost. If she’d asked him to throw himself out of the airlock, he would have done it, but with the way she was clinging to him, with the fire that her lips spread throughout his body, he knew she would never ask that of him.

When his body screamed for air and he finally had to pull away from her, he leaned his forehead against hers and closed his eyes as he tried to catch his breath.

Once he trusted his voice not to fail him, he quietly said her name, lifting his hand to caress her cheek again.

A small smile appeared on her face. “Your voice sounds different without the helmet.”

“Is that bad?”

“Not at all.” She pressed a soft kiss to his lips, then leaned back again. “You have a mustache.”

“I do.”

She grinned and ran a hand through his hair. “And you’re not bald.”

He laughed. “Nope.”

She moved her hand to his face and gently traced his features with her fingers. “Is this okay?”

His breathing grew ragged, and he whispered, “Yes.”

“You have very strong features.”

“Do I?”

“Yes. I bet you’re very handsome.”

Din flushed. “I don’t know about that.”

Lira brushed his cheek with her thumb, and he leaned into her touch, closing his eyes and savoring her caress. “I have no doubts, Din,” she murmured, running her fingers lightly over his lips before kissing him again.

Din could hardly believe that he’d finally found the courage to tell her how he felt and that she was sitting on his lap, kissing him, touching his face. He hadn’t felt the touch of another person in so long that the sensation was almost overwhelming, but he wouldn’t stop her for anything in the galaxy. She was so soft, so tender, that he was close to tears, and he knew he never wanted to go another day without feeling her touch.

He was glad that Lira had agreed to wear the blindfold, but he would have understood if she hadn’t. He wouldn’t have pressed the issue. But stars, he was grateful that she was so understanding, that she didn’t question the Creed or why he held to it.

Lira broke the kiss, leaned her forehead against his, and smiled softly. “How are you feeling? With the helmet being off, I mean. Are you okay?”

He thought about it for a moment as he laced his fingers with hers, caressing her skin with his thumb. He’d worried that having the helmet off in front of her would bother him, that he wouldn’t be able to do it when it came down to it. But now that he’d done it, he found that it was easier than he’d imagined. He would never have even considered it with anyone else, even with the blindfold, but it was different with Lira. The complete trust he felt around her was something he didn’t share with anyone else, and he knew, without a doubt, that she wouldn’t remove the blindfold no matter what happened.

“I’m more than okay.”

Lira’s smile grew a little wider. “Are you sure? If you’re not comfortable without the helmet, it’s okay. I love kissing you, don’t get me wrong. It’s even better than I imagined it would be, but I don’t want you to ever be uncomfortable.”

“I’m not uncomfortable. I trust you. I hope you know that.”

Lira felt tears well up in her eyes. “I know.”

Din moved his hand to cradle the back of her head again. “I’ve wanted you for so long, Lira.”

Lira bit her lip, her cheeks burning, though they weren’t burning as hot as the rest of her body. “Well, now you’ve got me.”

Her words sent flames licking up his body, and he kissed her again, desperate to quench the fire, though he knew that the flames would only devour him if she continued to touch him.

He found he didn’t care.

He craved the flames as he craved her touch. He wanted to be burned alive by her. If she consumed him completely, he would die a happy man.

Lira broke the kiss again and whispered against his lips, “I love you, Din.”

He felt his heart swell even more, then whispered, “I love you, too,” before kissing her again, losing himself completely in her, forgetting everything else. He didn’t know what the future held, didn’t know where they would be tomorrow, but he knew that no matter what, Lira would be by his side.

And that was all he needed.

[louderrthanwords]

tw: implied suicidal ideation

Unanswered Questions About the Passage of Time

A question. I wonder, when people talk about heartbreak, why they toss around phrases like wasted love, when the very word implies that love needs a purpose to start with. As if love could ever truly be wasted at all. In the moment, we never know any better than to be happy, to take what we have and make the most of it, and when it’s all spent and exchanged for pain, we’re so used to the action that we keep right on taking, spinning that pain into strings of regret and words like what a waste. I’m not so sure that anything that was once beautiful could ever truly be a mistake.

A question. I wonder, when people talk about what to do for a living, how they can ever resign themselves to just one thing. Life is so full of possibility that the danger isn’t making the wrong choice, but choosing between two things that both seem perfectly right. Does that make me greedy? I must aim for everything or nothing, but aiming at nothing is a self-contradiction, and it was never a real option anyway. So I grasp at straws. 

A question. I wonder, when people talk about growing old and jaded, why they ever lost touch with their younger self in the first place, especially since they seem to hate the current state of their psyche so thoroughly. Does that make me naive: believing that I can carry my teenage stubbornness into my twenties and beyond (along with my other baggage), hold it like a shield against curses like cynicism and world-weariness and becoming too much like my parents? I’d like the toll of time into an optional step in the instruction manual. So I always plan for an escape route. I hope I never have to use it.

A question: I wonder, when people talk about the cold, hard world, why we forget to mention how there is always a softer place to land.

[bookcoversonly]

Title: A Soft Place to Land | Author: Janae Marks | Publisher: Katherine Tegen Books (2021)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

wormie wormie wormie wormi-

[ride-a-dromedary]

You ever just think about Halsin and Thaniel meeting for the first time and get all choked up because I do.

[tech-sapphy]

the dndads brainworms won’t let me go and i’ve been listening to a lot of broadway these past few days while thinking about dndads. a dangerous mix for my emotions. that means i Had to write some fic (marloakworthy you’re canon and real to me)

also i hc hermie as genderfluid. so here’s a thing i wrote on a whim

-

Makeup is, generally speaking, something that Hermie is more than used to. Stage makeup was always necessary, after all, and so that was what they were used to doing.

It’s also why, when he, Normal, and Scary got ready for their date night, Hermie was thrown for a bit of a loop seeing how she did her makeup.

He watched her relax as she did it, even as she was explaining it to them. She opted for a pink eyeshadow, using some black eyeshadow at the creases of her lids and blending it down to make it all a little darker, giving it an ombré effect. She also started to add extra wings to her eyeliner, smiling as she did. It already looked good, but she liked it.

Hermie admired how she did it to express herself rather than a role.

Neither he or Normal could stop staring at her. She was clearly basking in the attention, but he didn’t care.

Normal was the first to speak up. “…Can you do some for me?”

His eyes were wide, soft, with hope. No doubt an excuse to get close - which Scary probably clocked, by her smile and eye roll.

“Whatever floats your boat, Norm.”

Luckily, she had colors more than black - so Normal’s look was one with some brighter blues and greens, and she gave him some eyeliner too, at his request, with less of a sharp wing than her own. Her hand cradled each of his un-made up cheeks as she worked, and Normal leaned into it.

It was sickeningly cute.

Hermie’s heart leapt in joy, seeing them be so sweet. It was also beating, fast.

He admired them and he wanted to be close to them too, but he knew his heart beating was partially him wanting to be on that makeup chair.

Don’t get him wrong, he’s dedicated to doing the right makeup for his roles…but he doesn’t have one right now, and he still finds that he wants to do some makeup anyways.

Maybe it could help him find who ‘Hermie’ really was.

“What do you think, Hermie??” Normal reaches out to him, grabbing a hand. Hermie holds it in return, planting a kiss on the back of it.

“You’re radiant.” Normal blushes.

As Hermie sets Normal’s hand down, he can’t help but glance down at the makeup still set out on the counter. Some colors catch his eye. He looks to Scary, who he finds is smiling at them. She almost looks away, but Hermie is inclined to ask his question before she does.

“Well well well, we can’t go out on a date together if we’re not all matching. Scary, if you would be so kind…”

Hermie picks up a compacted container of eyeshadow, one that caught his eye earlier. A dark purple.

Scary groans, but is all smiles. Maybe she’s trying to hide it, maybe not, but Hermie can tell she’s more than happy to do it. Especially since she quickly reaches for a tube by the sink.

“You guys are so cute. You need primer first, otherwise it’s gonna stain or it’s not gonna stay. And it’d be suuuuch a tragedy if it didn’t stay.”

Indeed it would be, Scary. Indeed it would.

—

For how much of a powerhouse Scary has proven herself to be, Hermie understands why Normal leaned so close into her touch.

She’s incredibly gentle as she holds his face. He admires her range.

He also enjoys the feeling of the makeup. The eye primer was cold - but the brush it was blended with was firm, warming it up quickly.

Then there was the eyeshadow. Hermie kept tapping at his knees, in rhythm to the music that was playing softly from Scary’s phone speaker.

He closed his eyes as Scary raised the brush from the compact, covered in purple. He also leaned into the hand on his chin, just a little- he didn’t want to mess up the angle too badly. But he was right across from the mirror, so he couldn’t quite help…

“Wow, you’re really good at this, Scary!” Normal exclaims.

“Yeah, well, it might be easier if you stop trying to open your eyes, Hermie.”

“Sorry, sorry, my dear. Shouldn’t try and get a glance before your masterpiece is complete, I know.”

Normal laughed and Scary huffed at the nickname, her bangs blowing up as she did.

“You’re lucky the eyeshadow is done, but we still need some eyeliner. Close your eyes, you dork.”

Affectionate as could be.

He’s glancing down at the liners she has laid out - there are two. Both are black, but one is liquid and one is a pencil.

Both she and Normal had liquid eyeliner. He wanted to match with them, right?

So he doesn’t quite know why he reaches for the pencil. But he does, and hands it to her. She looks a little surprised, but not opposed.

“Oh, sure.”

“Oooh, good choice, Hermie! I think that’ll look good with the eyeshadow! Y’know, since it’s a bit darker!” Normal points out.

Hermie closes his eyes as he replies, “Of course. As you know, I have impeccable taste in style.”

Scary snorts.

“Oh, how you wound me, Scary.” He responds, leaning into the hand on his cheek.

The pencil felt weird. Not bad, just different. Not quite as smooth, but not bad. Eventually, Scary’s hands left his face.

He opened his eyes to look in the mirror, but Normal turned the swivel chair around before he could.

“Normal, what are you doing?”

“Can’t look at the masterpiece before the artist is done, remember?” He grins.

Hermie sighs, just as Scary - also grinning - is applying some bits of blush to his cheeks. He probably won’t need it tonight, knowing his reactions to his partners doing so much as holding his hand (as much as he tries to hide it), but he doesn’t protest.

She then holds out some tubes to him. Lipstick and lip gloss.

“Want any?”

He’s… he’s only ever worn it for his roles. Only ever red, bright enough to be befitting of The Joker and Poison Ivy.

Looking at the labels on the tubes, there’s one that is bright red. He’s about to reach out to point to it when he sees it - it’s almost second nature.

But before he can gesture to it, Scary pulls them away, looking through them.

“Not all of these would look right with your eyes, though.” She picks through a few of them, Hermie hears her set some down on the counter. Over his shoulder, he sees Normal point to a couple tubes, but he can’t see what colors they are.

“Good eye, Norm.”

They both turn back to him, each holding a tube. Both matte, one of them is a dark blue that almost looks black and the other is a nude pink. It's one he recognizes as a color his co-stars often used in their stage makeup, a shade that wasn't too noticeable.

“Wanna do half and half?” Normal suggests.

“It’d look metal as hell.” Scary points out.

He likes that idea. He really likes that idea. So much that he almost wants to cry. He nods, and immediately looks up just a little bit.

To stop himself from ruining the makeup? So that they don’t see?

Either way, both happen as Normal and Scary each apply a color on his lips at the same time.

“No, wait, stop there Norm-“

“But hear me out, we could also do a different pattern!”

“No, we’re not going to do that.“

Hermie is tempted to laugh, but refrains, so as to not mess anything up. Their bickering makes him feel… comfortable. Content.

At home.

He’s never really known what that felt like. His characters never did, either. So he really has no frame of reference, nothing more than observations of his friends with their families.

But he suspects that this new feeling, of contentment and of his mind Not racing with thoughts and clever lines - just needing to do what he wants rather than live up to some expectation or role -

That might be what home feels like. He's not sure, but it's enough for him.

“Okay, ready for the final reveal??” Normal and Scary both hold one of his hands after they turn the chair to face the mirror.

He opens his eyes.

He looks different. So different.

The eyeshadow and lipstick are darker and give a bit of a shadowed look. The pencil eyeliner makes his eyes look softer than his partners’.

Both of whom are blushing. Normal squeezes his hand.

“You’re so beautiful, Hermie!”

“Like midnight.” Scary whispers.

Beautiful. Like midnight.

Beautiful. Beautiful.

It’s so… feminine. Hermie feels feminine.

He loves it.

Tears are welling up in his eyes, and he tries to look up, but a tear slips down his cheek. His partners swoop in at the same time.

“Oh no- what’s wrong Hermie?” Normal wraps his arms around him.

“Oh shit, what’s wrong? Do you not like it?” Scary squeezes his hand, running a thumb over his wrist.

She doesn’t even care that her hard work is at risk. She just cares about his feelings.

He’s overcome with adoration, at their reactions and at his reflection. It’s why his usual quick wit is completely out of commission, and he can only respond with a few words.

“I love it.”

He gets up and maneuvers around them, to bring them both into a hug. They’re both quick to return the hug, wrapping their arms around him. He can feel their hands link on his back. Normal leans into the crook of Hermie’s shoulder, and Scary’s drawing little circles on his shoulder blades. It’s reassuring, it’s grounding.

They had plans for tonight, but Hermie doesn’t want to let go.

For once in a life riddled with shit luck, Hermie feels like they’ve hit the jackpot.

[marshalcharge]

i've never stopped thinking about kaidan alenko's "i want to be your soft place to land" and have used it as the metric for every fictional relationship i've liked hence forth

[kaidanalenkosprmanager]

THE BEST OF SHENKO 1/?

The end of the world has a way of reminding you of all the things you forgot to say do. Mass Effect: Legendary Edition (2021)

[zukkacore]

I know we’re in a like Jaceporter cannibalism metaphor mood rn and I do think there is something abt Jace and wanting to be consumed, possessed, controlled, encircled. Etc etc. Bc like, I think the rep for sorcery is that it’s lazy bc it’s innate, it’s effortless but like in my mind I’ve always kinda seen it as. All work bc it’s all coming from you. Not the material world, not channeled through divinity, or a contract, it literally comes from you. It’s like Kristen’s whole thing w religion. It’s oppressive when someone comes in and builds a cage around your whole life, but it’s also easier when someone came in a decided to give you all the answers. Working to build something of meaning is hard. Self determining is hard. Projecting your will into the world is hard because it all comes from you, nobody can give you the answers. Thats why Porter giving him certainty is like—tantalizing in its own way. Someone please tell me what to do. Comforts of a guilded cage etc etc. i want a nice soft place to land. I want to lie down forever.

[zombiegirldean]

Lisa Braeden as Penelope

"Penelope's Song" by Louise Glück

"Penelope" by Carol Ann Duffy

[landwriter]

i have never done one of them tumblr videos but winter is the prettiest season here and i wanted to share the extremely specific sight of snow drifting off conifers and being caught in the afternoon sun

my goal craft-wise as a burgeoning little words doer is to be able to describe something like this and do it justice

[dindjarin-mandalorian]

hiii just wanted to let you know, I recently read a soft place to land and I'm in love with it, are you planning on continuing the story?

Hi Anon! I'm so sorry this reply is so late! I am planning to continue it. I've debated back and forth for the past few months because I hit a wall of writer's block (thanks, depression), but I really do miss the story, and I would love to get back to it. I've already written chapter 27 so I just need to edit it now. And I do have a ton of content written for future chapters if I can ever manage to get it together enough to tie things together. But thank you SO much for this ask! It really does mean the world to me that you're enjoying the story!! 😭🤩

[summersofsalt]

a soft place to land (b&w version here)

[mossiestpiglet]

I want to put Izzy Hands in a jar and study him for three decades, possibly collect venom to produce a new and life-saving antivenin with, but I’m marrying Val Pearson on the spot and becoming the most dedicated house spouse the world has ever seen.

[enobariasteeth]

saw the Waitress pro-shot and I cried so hard I lost my eyelashes AND I got nauseous