#about battling doubt

[kindnessinmonsters]

what does having faith mean in a decentralized religion?

i was raised in a very high demand form of christianity. i had to relearn what 'having faith' even means.

i was raised to believe that having faith meant having blind obedience. kneeling, bowing, scraping, bending my head to a god who, at the end of the day, didn't know me. I was miserable. i obeyed my elders, i believed in their morality, i absorbed their stories and did my best to apply them to my life, and i was an anxious terrified mess of a child with a stick so far up my ass i could taste it in the back of my tongue. i was so scared of screwing up and ending up outcasted into outer darkness that i would have given the christian god everything i had in me.

never mind that my very skin was literally a curse, according to my church. never mind that my heart was capable of love they could never understand. never mind that i couldn't be daughter and wife and mother.

...until i couldn't ignore it any more. i looked the god of my youth and told him to his face that i deserved better than him. i could be more than what he planned for me.

when i left my church, i had to rebuild the ruins of myself from scratch. i had to dig down deep and ask myself what i wanted out of life. who was i without the church?

turns out, i'm a guy that talks to the moon when he can't sleep. turns out, i dream of devils and gods and lightning in the dark. turns out, i can search deep in my history and find gods lurking there.

i invited the gods to sit at the table of my life. i share my stories with them and they share theirs with me. my offerings are given like meals between friends. they proved themselves to me a long time ago, in dreams and in the world, but i think even without that i am a better person for being a pagan. understanding loki especially has made me braver, kinder, and so much more determined to chase what i want in life. i am so much more willing to embrace change (it's still not easy for me, but i put in the work)! would it be the same for you?

there's such a huge emphasis on having the gods prove themselves in pagan circles, and i get it! i did the work to do that too! but maybe the more important question is who are you with them in your life?

who do you want them to be to you?

for me, doubt was never a question of 'is god real' or 'is there a higher power?' i would pose a more relevant question: what would it mean for you if the gods weren't real? or wasn't there?

would you still feel like including them in your life was worth the time and effort and faith? who are you with them? who are you without them?

even if it turned out that none of it was real, even if there's nothing in death but darkness, i would still think it was worth it. i am better for having faith in my life. i can stand in the middle of a storm and call it by its name. i sit in the middle of a crowd of my friends and swap stories with the people i love and gods, those moments are holy.

Religion, spirituality, having faith, it's all living poetry and you are the subject. what themes are you going to explore?

[the-wrat]

I love it when Brennan Lee Mulligan is in a campaign so people just get his dndbeyond homebrew. It happened to Ify Nwadiwe with Adaine's furious fist in Battle for Beyond, and now laura bailey gets Armour of Ayda in Downfall.

[atalkingrat]

Deku's final battle: recognising his self-worth

I really wanted Kacchan to tell Izuku he could be a hero without a quirk, but I just realised how important it is for Deku to come to that realisation on his own.

...

Everyone always told him he could never be a hero. Even though he was persistent in pursuing his dream, he was still desperate for validation, haunted by his mother's apology to him after finding out he was quirkless. When All Might tells him he can't be a hero without a quirk, Deku seems to give up. He only accepts the chance to stand in the ring that AM offers him with OFA.

We have yet to see Izuku break free from the feelings that he has to make himself worth everything he was given. While part of this is his own satisfying journey of self-improvement, as Kacchan points out: "deep down, he doesn't take himself into account" (ch284). Izuku lives to be useful and approved of by others.

I would love to see Izuku recognise his inherent worth and unique skills, and to reconnect with a desire to save people, not out of necessity or to be a satisfactory successor, but because it fulfills him.

As for what quirkless hero Izuku could look like:

I don't think AM was wrong for telling Izuku he needed a quirk to be s hero. His logic was sound, and AM has the irreparable injuries and decades of experiences both quirkless and with OFA to back it up. However, AM does not have Izuku's creativity. While they have the same spirit, Izuku' ingenuity, intelligence, and appreciation for different kinds of quirks is his own unique combination. He was never going to be a hero like All Might, as much as a desires it. His stature does not allow it, and the damage he has done to his body means his fighting style is completely different. Izuku has to find his own way.

This could be through support items. I believe All Might's super suit demonstrated his own admiration of Deku as a hero, and teased what Quirkless Pro Hero Izuku could look like.

[racetheskies]

haikyuu is so weird bc what do you mean I literally grew up along with these volleyball dorks? what do you mean they taught me everything I needed to get through the hard times in life and keep moving forward? what do you mean it helped me learn to let other people in and rely on them? what do you mean it taught me that everything will be alright as long as you keep going and find a way to keep picking yourself back up off the ground? what do you mean these characters feel like personal close friends and the fact that other people in the world know it and love it just as much as me will never fully compute in my head?

[t4twnyclaw]

in my redux fireheart denounces the warrior code after greystripe is exiled from thunderclan for being cat-married to silverstream.

[bhaalsdeepbat]

I think Lae'zel would really enjoy having her nails painted. she wears warrior makeup all over her face and neck, she has those lovely little braids, she took the time to bead her hair. i think she likes having a little bit of polish to her look

[the-judicial-assistants-notebook]

No, see, now I'm thinking about Iris teaching Phoenix how to plait hair and getting emotional about it because like. The first person who ever plaited her hair was probably her mother, right? And I think Morgan's the kind of mum who's rather strict with hair, meaning that it'd be drawn very tight and be a rather painful affair. After they leave Kurain, I'm guessing that Iris still may not have known how to braid her hair but Dahlia did, and so Dahlia was the one who used to do it for her before eventually teaching Iris to do it herself; and, while I don't think Dahlia was as rough as Morgan was, she did learn how to plait from her, and she has nails, so it still hurt a little. But that's how Iris learns to plait her hair: with a touch of force and an emphasis on bridled control. It's necessary, when you're working up in the mountains since it keeps strands out of the way.

But then she goes to Ivy-U and meets the kindest, gentlest man she's ever known, and he gets curious as to how she does her hair, so she shows him. It's the first time anyone's ever touched her hair and truly cared about not hurting her -- he's hesitant to even comb his fingers through it because he's afraid of tugging on her scalp -- and she has to change the way she moves as they slowly, carefully work their way through the two braids together. Yes, it takes longer than it normally would, and the braids are looser than she would usually wear them, but they stay, and it's the first she's ever tried plaiting them in a way that's different from her mother and sister -- the first she's ever considered it, even -- and it shows her, irrevocably, that kindness and gentleness can be just as effective as the harsh strength her family has always prided and possessed. It's the first time that Iris has used her hands in a way that feels truly natural to her and not been ashamed for her own weakness.

And she carries that with her for the rest of her life; just as he carries what her hands showed him as he brushes his fingers through her younger sister's fairer brown locks, while she sits in jail and does the same to her own long, dark hair, now black as it should be instead of red.

[purpleshadow-star]

So... we all agree that Luke and Kelli had a thing at some point, right?

[goingbuggy]

What you think about shanks doing poison pranks? Is he abnormal? What is the meaning of that? Idont get Oda at all

It’s not a prank — it’s honestly a smart, calculated move to truly ensure that he has Luffy’s loyalty. He needs to know that their trust is unquestionable, going into this war. If Shanks asks something of Luffy, he wants to know that Luffy will trust his judgment enough to follow through, even if it sounds crazy (hence him lying about poison of all things).

To me, this move makes it seem that A.) Shanks is really getting serious, and B.) he will likely ask something crazy of Luffy in the future.

[t-u-i-t-c]

need people to understand that genba has shown himself to be capable of being violent when he's filled with rage. it doesn't make him bad, but i need you to think about how that impacts the choices of genba and those around him. genba chooses to leave bc he knows his fight is selfish and fueled by hatred, and that's not what the boonboomgers are about. he's distancing himself bc he knows he has anger in him that can fuel a rage in which he could get violent and hurt his team. staying around is risking the others. he notes that when he saw disrace his mind went blank and he got violent quickly. his teammates were injured in this incident, and he doesn't know if it'll go the same the next time he sees them.

i just need you to think about how genba is a grown man who recognizes his actions could endanger his peers and chooses to leave due to that, and a number of other reasons. he loves his team and doesn't want to endanger them, but his anger is something he cannot control right now, so he has to distance himself for their safety and for his own. i need you to realize that no one is leaving genba behind and there's no abandonment happening. if anything, taiya telling genba to keep the axe while his voice wavers indicates that the axe may be a sort of tether between taiya and genba. taiya is leaving the door open by letting genba remain a boonboomger through having his changer and axe, and he's giving him the space that he desires bc taiya knows that the type of anger and the trauma that genba went through isn't something he can free genba of. it's complicated and it's difficult, but sometimes circumstances are out of your control and you have to do what is best and taiya is doing that by letting genba choose what he does with his anger, whether he leaves or returns, he's keeping the door open for him.

[disabled-battlekukku]

GREAT BATTLE KUKKU THIS IS NOT WHAT BABY JAIL IS ABOUT!!!!! DO NOT THROW YOUR SON IN THE FUCKING JAIL!!!!!!!!

[alyona11]

Bruh tbh a lot of tumblr and twitter discourses would become less heated if Americans and Europeans considered that they can just pirate their tricky problematic media…

[killjoy-prince]

Trying on the cosplays imma wear to a con in a month and getting excited that ill be cosplaying said characters in a month

[skrs-cats]

have you read the lion blaze self harm scene? kinda sh ig he basically lets …ratscar i think like scratch him up bad by holding his powers back. interesting to me what’re ur thoughts? (idk if that’s the right definition, i’ve always defined it as having someone/yourself injure your body with the intent to hurt) sorry if this is a downer, i just know your a lion blaze enthusiast and wanted to know your thoughts

ohhh yes i do actually. its one of the few scenes i remember better bc i actually own the book where it happened.

to elaborate on the scene more, it happens after he has an argument with cinderheart, who claims they shouldnt be together since he's part of the prophecy, how his destiny is to save the clans (and coincidentally not get hurt) and them being mates would only be distractions

lion's rebuttal? instigate a fight w a patrol near the shadowclan border, disallow himself to fight back, and force the wounds to get inflicted on his body, as a show that he CAN choose to get hurt. that he CAN choose what kind of 'destiny' he should have. ive put my own thoughts about it under read more bc this got long (unsurprisingly jkhasdkjfhd)

i spent like a solid few minutes re-reading the chapter to gather my thoughts on it LOL i remember not thinking much about it when i was a kid, but i think its interesting to analyze now!

what was attempted to be written, at least, piques me bc its about lion trying to prove that they can exist outside of the narrative the prophecy has given them. which is funnily ironic, since the start of the chapter is of him having self doubts regarding saving the clans when they found out theres a fourth cat, how that basically means that the three of them wouldnt be enough, how his destiny might have changed. reading this chapter just gave me a new can of brainworms but ill try not to delve into it too much bc its gonna get way messier LMAOOO

to go back to lion purposely getting himself hurt, i dont think he's the type of person who would do that for the sake of it, unless as a really dumb way to prove a point. but it makes me think he really doesnt have much of a care of whether he'd get hurt or not. a severe lack of self-preservation, and all that. cats back at camp react to his wounds w all around shock, he's herded into the med den all the while he acts like he'll be fine. i dunno if the shock from the cats is just bc theyre just so used to seeing him NOT hurt, or if his wounds were really that bad. but either or both still pretty much gives me a lot to think about. homeboy doesnt know the limits of his body, and that makes for interesting scenarios of how he manages to deal w that after losing his powers

[kamil-a]

RECIPIES!!!!

from Alice Archives - Green Book

1. BY PETER: foil-baked fish and mushrooms

Ingredients (2 servings)

Fish fillet - 2 pieces Onion - half Shiitake mushrooms - 2 of them Enoki mushroom - 1 Shimeji mushrooms - 1 pack Butter - about 10g Soy sauce/Ponzu sauce - An Appropriate Amount Salt - a little Pepper - a little

Slice the onion thinly. Cut the mushrooms into bite-sized pieces.

Spread out the aluminum foil and spread the onions across it. Put the fish and mushrooms and butter on top of it. Wrap the foil.

Put about 100cc of water in a frying pan. When steam comes out, put the wrapped foil in the frying pan and put the lid on.

Steam for 5-10 minutes on medium heat.

Add salt and pepper to taste, put on soy sauce or ponzu sauce, and its done!

2. BY BLOOD: tea scones

Ingredients (makes 8 scones):

Cake flour - 200g Baking powder - 1 tablespoon Butter 70g Black tea leaves (earl grey, darjeeling) - 1-2 tablespoons or 1-2 teabags Milk - 100cc Egg - 1 Sugar - 1-2 tablespoons Salt - a little

Mix the cake flour, baking powder, salt, and sugar. Mix thoroughly.

If the tea leaves are too big, crush it finely. mix with the mixture from 1

Mix the butter, egg, and milk. Little by little combine it with the mixture from step 2. Mix lightly, dont overmix!

Wrap in plastic wrap and let rest in the fridge for about 1 hour.

Roll out about 1-2cm thick. Cut to a suitable size or use a cookie cutter.

Put in the oven on 180C for about 10-20 minutes, watching it.

Put on as much jam, cream, and other toppings as you like.

3. BY JULIUS: COFFEE SCONES

Ingredients (Makes 8 scones):

Cake flour - 200g Baking powder - 1 tablespoon butter - 70g milk - about 80cc coffee - about 20cc sugar 1-2 tablespoons chocolate chips- 50g salt - a little

Mix the cake flour, baking powder, salt, and sugar. Mix thoroughly.

Mix the milk and the coffee, then mix that with the mixture from step 1.

Mix what you have from step 2 with the butter. Add chocolate chips. Dont overmix, mix it lightly. Wrap in plastic wrap and let rest in the fridge for about 1 hour.

Roll out about 1-2cm thick. Cut to a suitable size or use a cookie cutter.

Put in the oven on 180C for about 10-20 minutes, watching it. Your bittersweet coffee scones are ready!

4. BY ACE: Rabbit Stew

Ingredients (2 servings):

Meat of a white rabbit similar to Mister Peter - 1/2 rabbit Carrots - 2 White mushrooms - 10 Onion - 1 Dried herbs (bay leaf, basil, rosemary, thyme, etc) - a little Parsley - 2 tablespoons Salt - a little Garlic - 1 piece Red wine - 2 cups Olive oil - a little Pepper - a little Honey - half a tablespoon

Cut the rabbit into easy to eat pieces, submerging it in red wine. Let it rest in the fridge for 1 hour.

Julienne the carrots. Cut the onion, mushrooms, and garlic into thin slices. Dice the parsley.

Put the olive oil in a pan and fry the rabbit until brown. Add and saute the onion halfway through

Add the red wine, carrots, mushrooms, garlic, and dried herbs to the pot from step 3. add salt and pepper and stew on low heat for an hour.

When the meat and vegetables are tender, put them on a plate and sprinkle with parsley.

Add honey to the juice left in the pot and heat for 1-2 minutes

Put on the sauce from 6 and it's ready!

5. BY BORIS: Herb Grilled Salmon

Ingredients (2 servings):

salmon - 2 slices panko crumbs - 1 cup pepper - a little olive oil - 2 tablespoons dried herbs (bay leaf, basil, rosemary, thyme, etc) - a little

Pat the salmon dry, and sprinkle on the pepper and herbs. If the salmon is raw, sprinkle on salt, too.

Mix the panko crumbs and herbs. Put one teaspoon of the olive oil into your mixture to moisten it.

Coat the salmon in the panko crumbs from step two.

Heat up olive oil in a frying pan, then cook on medium heat until golden-brown on both sides.

It's recommended to put on as much lemon juice as you'd like. Enjoy!

6. BY PIERCE: Cheese In Blue Cheese

Ingredients (2 servings)

Your preferred cheese - 1 block Sauce: Blue cheese - 50 g Milk - 100cc Fresh cream (low-fat) - 100cc Pepper - just a bit

Mix blue cheese, milk and fresh cream on your stove. melt blue cheese while stirring

Add cheese and simmer. It will be ready in a reasonable amount of time!

*If you're a person who ISN'T Pierce, it's recommended to put the cheese sauce on spaghetti or gnocchi.

ORIGINALS:

[chirpsythismorning]

☎️🎲 🤼‍♂️ ✈️🚪 ➡️ 🫀🎮⌛️

The Promise by When In Rome

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