woah watch out there's a scary guy on the loose
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Power Word :3
everyone please tell us how you think this is pronounced
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weird bug i found outside
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You've known Johnny your whole life as the worst human being on the planet that you see at every family event. He's some best friend of some aunt's cousin or something, all you know is growing up he was always there and you always hated one another. It was the worst fucking wedding on the planet the year he showed up and was taller than you.
Then there's a 5 year gap in big family events. No weddings, no funerals, no coming of age events or baby showers. It's a blessing since at the last one you were 17, acne prone and awkward which he latched on to immediately (he made you cry actually, it was the first time you had seen him look properly upset, almost horrified at seeing you like that).
And then the flurry of family events starts once more.
He is still the worst human being on the planet. You still see him at every family event. And despite you saying every single time this is a one time thing that can never happen again, you continue to pull one another into dark corners. You're probably going to hell when you ride him just round the back of the kirk at your great uncle's funeral, but whatever, that guy was a creep anyway. And his cousin definitely knows exactly what happened when Johnny nearly misses his cue to bring the rings because he was too busy under your dress in a storage closet.
You're definitely in over your head at the baby shower, because all he can talk about as he pumps into you in the bathroom anyone could walk in to is how pretty you'd look carrying his baby.
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