#alden as a guide for her the first few books

[n-evermores]

It is the Green-Eyed Monster Which Doth Mock

Paring: Alden Parker x Fem!Reader

Genre/Warnings: Fluff, Romance, a little spicy at the end, but nothing graphic. Implied age gap.

Word Count: 1, 991

Summary: After learning about Joy, you’re left feeling a little worried that perhaps the situationship you thought you had with Parker was all in your head.

GIF by shinsfangirling

Parker's apartment was always cozy to you. Especially the patio with all the greenery and thoughtfully placed couches and chairs. You sat curled up on the more comfortable chair, your foot propped on the center table with a book in hand. Yet, despite the calming environment, you felt your heart ache inside your chest. 

You lived with Parker. 

Not because you two were in a committed relationship. It started before you knew much about him. You were forced out of your apartment due to black mold, and Parker offered you a place to stay until everything was sorted out. Of course, finding an affordable apartment wasn't easy, but Parker assured you he didn't mind you staying with him. Things were a little awkward at first, but after a while you two started to learn one another, and you realized you had more in common with him than you thought possible. Parker was much older than you, and you never thought you would see him as anything more than the guy who took Gibbs' place. But against your better judgment, you started to develop feelings for him. 

You exhaled—a long sigh escaping your lips. Your friendship with Parker was changing slowly, and everything about the new development felt delicate as if it could slip through the cracks at any given moment. It started with long talks on the patio, sitting together on the green leather couch. Parker would break out the wine, and you would talk for hours. You loved to listen to him talk about bird watching. Which was something you found yourself interested in since learning he cared about it so much. Those long talks turned to sleepy smiles, innocent touches, and sometimes soft words that made your heart swell with so much love for him. Parker was really sweet underneath it all, and you could tell he liked talking you you as much as he enjoyed listening to you. His eyes would sparkle as you spoke, casting down to your mouth with a gentle expression on his face. He would lean closer toward you, mirroring you as if your body guided his own. It was magnetic and left your heart racing, and your face tingling with every gaze and every smile sent your way. 

Your thoughts drifted to that one late night only a few days ago. You talked for a while before you both turned your attention to other things. Parker started flipping through a bird-watching book while you scrolled through your phone on social media. You enjoyed the comfortable silence that brewed between you. You understood each other and didn't need to say anything. You eventually fell asleep against the couch with your phone still in your hand. Parker must have tried to wake you, and you must have fought against him, because he lifted you straight into his arms. Your head rested comfortably against his shoulder, and you could hear his heartbeat so close to your ear as he carried you across the apartment. Just as he placed you in your bed, his hand brushed your hair from your face. It was a sweet gesture, and you could still fill the brush of his fingertips against your burning skin. When you opened your eyes, his face was only inches from yours, and you could have sworn you saw love in his eyes. He wished you a good night and left you with your racing thoughts that kept you up the rest of the night. But then suddenly Joy entered the picture. You could still recall Parker's reaction when realizing their suspect was his old flame's son. How he acted around her when they went to her house, and how nervous he was to see her again. Everything about it made you question whatever was happening between you and Parker. Perhaps it was all in your head, and he saw you more as a daughter than a potential romantic partner. 

You sighed again, and this time there was a response you did not expect.

"You okay?" 

You jumped slightly, averting your gaze to the doorway to see Parker was back home. You closed the book before running your fingers through your hair. "Yeah, just the book, you know?" You tapped on the cover, but he didn't seem convinced by your answer. Instead, he frowned before moving to settle on the green couch.

He matched your sigh, "Something is bothering you. I can read you like a book."

"You read? Here I thought you just looked at pictures of birds." You teased him. 

The corner of his mouth tugged slightly, and he rolled his eyes, "There she is." He said, glad to see your spirit back. He studied you a moment, and you suddenly felt as if you were on fire under his intense scrutiny. "You haven't talked to me since the case started." He said. 

You tried not to show any emotion on your face. The case was over. Joy's son was innocent, and then he went to Joy's house for reasons you know had nothing to do with the case. He was there for a while with her, and you could only imagine what they were talking about. You didn't dislike the woman. You completely understood what he saw in her. But you still couldn't help but feel jealous and a little insignificant. How could you compete with her? She was much more age-appropriate for him, and they probably had more in common than you did. You scratched your nail against the front of the book as your anxiety began to build up. "Oh, I didn't realize." The words came out awkward and planned as if this was your first time forming a complete sentence. Parker must have picked up on this because his brows bounced, and his mouth tightened in thought. You were a special agent, better than this, yet you couldn't fake it. 

"Did I do something to upset you?" He asked, leaning forward with his arms over his knees, and his hands twined together nervously as he gauged your reaction. "If I did, I'm sorry."

"No, you didn't upset me. I'm upset with myself." You said, knowing he wouldn't just let that be the end of it. 

"Oh? What does that have to do with not talking to me?" He pressed on.

You wanted to sink into the chair and cease to exist, but you responded anyway. "I suppose you've been preoccupied with something else recently." You weren't making any sense, but he was a clever man, and he was starting to put the pieces together. He released a soft sigh before leaning back slightly and gesturing for you to sit with him. You didn't move. You instead stared at his chest, refusing to make eye contact with him. 

"Come over here." He said, and your gaze automatically flickered up to meet his. He was giving you an intense look that you couldn't quite describe. Your throat bobbed as you swallowed your emotions before sweeping across the floor to sit with him. He moved over slightly, giving you more room before grabbing your knees and turning your body to face his. "Is this about Joy?" You bit your bottom lip, your eyes casting down again, but he wasn't having it. He hooked his fingers beneath your chin and lifted your head to look at him. "Well?"

"Maybe." You said in a whisper, and his eyes gentled. His hand on your knee tightened, and he brushed his thumb against your leg.

"Are you jealous?" He asked calmly. 

"No." You said, but a little too quickly. You felt your face heat up. "No." You repeated with a quick shake of your head. You didn't want him to know you developed feelings for him. Now that you weren't sure what was going on between you, you were terrified.

"So I've meaning to talk to you." He said suddenly, "About me and you," He gestured between you, "And whatever this is." 

"It's nothing, Parker. You don't have to explain anything, please. Can we just forget this conversation?"

He looked taken aback by your words, "Is that what you want?"

"Is that what you want?" You shot back, feeling so much anxiety that your palms started sweating.  

"No. I was going to say I know this isn't the most conventional development, but we have a connection, but apparently, I was wrong." You watched as an adorable shade of pink reached his cheeks. You never thought you'd see the day Parker blushed, but there he was, sitting flustered before you.

"You still love her, don't you?" You queried, needing to dig more into this mystery woman from Parker's past. 

He looked conflicted for a fleeting moment as if he didn't know how to answer in a way that would satisfy you. "I love the memory of her." He said, obviously trying to choose his words carefully. "Everything I feel for her is just me reflecting on the past. I care for her, but I can't look back. I have to move forward."

You sat there with a pensive look as you listened to Parker's explanation. It made sense. Joy was a feeling of first love nostalgia, but he would rather look to the future than the past. You felt your heart flutter with relief, and you smiled. "I see."

He reached up hesitantly to hold your face in his hands. He leaned closer to you, his shaky breath painting the air between you, "Tell me if I read this all wrong."

You shook your head as best you could with his hands cupping your face, "You didn't."

His eyes crinkled, and he smiled. "So you feel this too?"

"Obviously." You quipped right back, and he chuckled.

"I like you being jealous. It's kind of cute." He said as he thumbed your cheek affectionately. 

"I wasn't jealous." You grumbled but was silenced by his lips touching yours, closing the gap between you. You felt a chill shoot from the back of your neck to the soles of your feet at the feeling of his mouth against yours. His lips parted, deepening the kiss. You responded eagerly just as his hand gripped the back of your neck, pulling you closer to him. Your arms circled his shoulders, and his arm snaked around your waist to pull you flush against his chest. You could feel your head spinning as the kiss grew more intense. 

You nearly soared at the first brush of his tongue against your bottom lip and moaned against his mouth. Your entire body felt as if flames were licking your skin, all while feeling as if you could float away like a dandelion caught in the wind. His grip on your neck tightened as his tongue entered your mouth, and you had to think back to when the last time someone kissed you like this. Never. Never have you ever been kissed so artfully. You hummed against him just as he leaned back against the couch, pulling you into his lap. You adjusted your legs to frame his hips with your thighs. Your hands slid from his shoulders to his face, and you kissed him back with every ounce of want inside your body. He gripped your hips, pulling your center down against him, and you pulled back suddenly with a whimper, your wild eyes searching his. 

Guilt flickered within his hazel gaze, "I shouldn't have—I'm sorry." He managed to rasp out, but you responded by covering his mouth with yours, your fingers moving to the buttons of his shirt. 

You knew after this night your relationship would never be the same. 

[fintan-pyren]

I've summarized what we know about Gisela's plot, but I think it's been a while since we've all read the books, so here's a brief 4,268 word summary of the key points of each book. [No Stellarlune spoilers]

Keeper:

Fitz brings Sophie to the lost cities

He wasn't supposed to be searching for her—the Council discovered a strand of DNA and the term "Project Moonlark" in Prentice's mind, but they dismissed it and refused to investigate, so Alden searched for her behind their backs

There are a few incidents where Sophie knows things she shouldn't (being able to read cipher runes, knowing the location of the stars, knowing the formula for Frissyn [substance that extinguishes Everblaze], recognizing the name "Fintan", etc) because the Black Swan has planted information in her brain

We learn about the Black Swan for the first time, and that they created Sophie and put her in the lost cities, but it seems like they're the bad guys right now

Sophie learns about everblaze and realizes that the fires near her human home match the description

This is bad and illegal and means that Fintan is probably breaking the law because he's the only one they know of who can make everblaze but the Council doesn't want to investigate because they don't think Fintan is the type of person to break the law

The Black Swan sends her some helpful materials that are needed to bottle everblaze

Sophie illegally goes the the human world and bottles the fire, proving that it's everblaze

While she's waiting for the Council to decide what to do about her crimes, she and Dex get kidnapped by people in black cloaks

They try to erase her memories so they can "relocate her" (presumably elsewhere in the human world) but they can't

She assumes they're the Black Swan, but one of them, a pyrokinetic, interrogates her and tries to figure out why the Black Swan created her and what memories they gave her

They plan to kill her but a mysterious man who she later realizes is her old neighbor, Mr Forkle, rescues her (gnomes heard roots talking of voices hiding in the earth and told the Black Swan), and she and Dex are able to get back to the human world, though she nearly fades away during the process.

When she gets back, she learns that Fintan and all the other known pyrokinetics were taken into custody as soon as she bottled the everblaze, so the mysterious pyrokinetic who kidnapped her wasn't Fintan. There's a rogue pyrokinetic somewhere who the Council doesn't know about.

Alden speculates that the Black Swan is trying to work against the other rebels to save the human race, and that they put Sophie with the humans so she'd care about them

Alden explains that there was a group of elves after WW2 who wanted to create a Human Sanctuary to protect the world from the humans. This suggestion was rejected by the Council, which lead to threats of rebellion. These threats were stopped, but Alden thinks the rebels simply became more secretive.

Exile:

Book 2! Sophie finds Silveny, which is important because she has the potential to save the alicorn species and is thus a really good bargaining chip for anyone who captures her

Sophie finds a compass charm inscribed with "Let the past be your guide", left by the Black Swan

Sophie starts fading when she leaps and getting headaches and dizzy spells, especially when using telepathy, and Fitz worries that there may be something wrong with her telepathy

Fintan has been imprisoned in Exile since the last book, since the Council believes he knows the identity of the unregistered pyrokinetic, which is bad and illegal

The Council orders Alden to go and try to search or break his mind to find out what he knows, and Alden brings Sophie along as his guide, assuming that this is what the Black Swan wants him to do because of the compass inscription

They end up breaking Fintan's mind, with Alden nearly getting dragged down with him in the process, but all they discover is a memory of Fintan teaching someone to use everblaze with the face blurred out.

On their way out of Exile, they pass Prentice's cell, and Sophie enters his mind. It's shattered and broken, but Prentice appears as Jolie and tells her to "Follow the pretty bird across the sky"

Alden's mind breaks from guilt after seeing Wylie at the Foxfire Opening Ceremonies. Now that they're starting to suspect that the Black Swan might be good, the guilt of breaking Prentice's mind 12 years ago is too much for him.

Mind breaks are thought to be irreversible, so this is the equivalent of Alden dying.

Sophie meets Wylie at Alden's Wanderling Planting and he tells her that Prentice always told him that if his mind was broken, Sophie would come along one day and fix his mind

She receives a note from the Black Swan telling her they can fix her with instructions (in riddle form, of course) on how to get to them

She and Keefe fly across the ocean on Silveny and arrive at an island, where they meet Mr Forkle. He confirms that she has the ability to fix broken minds, but her mind was weakened when she faded in the first book, and she lost the ability.

He heals her mind (nearly killing her in the process, since it requires limbium, which she's allergic to)

Before they can head home, the other rebels attack them and try to capture Silveny, but they accidentally break her wing in the process, and Keefe, Silveny, and Sophie nearly fall to their deaths before Sophie finds out she can teleport and saves them all.

Sophie heals Alden's mind

Everblaze:

Sophie is impatiently waiting for instructions from the Black Swan but they keep telling her to wait

They learn that ogre footprints have been discovered around the Sanctuary recently, which is bad because Silveny is there and she'd be a powerful bargaining chip.

Keefe and Sophie find a tracker on Silveny's tail, which, according to Greyfell's memories, was put there by the rebels on the same day when they found the ogre footprints. They start speculating that the ogres and rebels may be working together. Sandor tells them that the tracker is made of stalkenteene, a metal which is only used by the ogres. This is important because this could prove that the ogres have been breaking the treaties and waging a silent war against the elves.

The Council orders Sophie to heal Fintan's mind, which causes a lot of uproar in the lost cities.

Lady Cadence realizes that the tracker was also dispensing aromark, an enzyme that works as a targeting system for ogre weapons. Sophie, Keefe, and Silveny melt their skin off to get rid of it, but even after getting rid of a layer of their skin, they realize that Keefe still has it on his fingertips.

Sophie heals Fintan's mind, but he summons everblaze, burns down half of Eternalia, and is consumed by the everblaze along with Kenric in the process. This is bad and illegal.

All she finds is the same memory as she did in Exile, with one difference—now she can see a white patch in the shape of an eye on Fintan's sleeve with a word written in runes on it: Neverseen

The Black Swan finally agrees to meet with her, but when she arrives at the meeting location on an island, the Neverseen emerges from the waves to capture them. It turns out that the Black Swan was trying to set a trap for the Neverseen, but Sandor ruins it by attacking them and keeping them off the beach, which means the Black Swan's dwarves can't get at them. The Neverseen dive back underneath the waves and swim away.

Keefe's fingertips start glowing red again (but nobody else's), and they realize that his family pin is dispensing aromark. This makes them all convinced that Lord Cassius is a Neverseen member.

At Kenric's Planting, King Dimitar appears to pay his respects and talk to the Councillors, and Sophie tries to read his mind, but she gets caught. As punishment, the Council forces her to wear a circlet that stops her from using her abilities.

The Black Swan decides to set another trap for the Neverseen, this time on Mount Everest. Sophie's kinda useless right now, so she stays home and reads Jolie's journals and figures out that Brant is the unregistered pyrokinetic they've been searching for and that he killed Jolie.

Sophie and Grady go to confront him and Brant reveals that he knows about the trap set for them on Mount Everest. Sophie has to go warn her friends, so Dex takes off her circlet (this is bad and illegal) and she teleports there.

At Mount Everest, they fight the Neverseen, capture one of them (Gethen), and confront a Neverseen member who they think is Lord Cassius, only to realize they he's actually Lady Gisela in disguise.

Sophie and her friends have committed many, many crimes in the past couples days (removing the circlet, helping the Black Swan, etc), so they decide to flee the lost cities to join the Black Swan.

Neverseen:

Oralie gives Sophie Kenric's cache as a bargaining chip in case she's captured

Using instructions Fitz finds in Sophie's brain, they go to the Neverseen and officially swear fealty

We learn that a plague struck a gnomish colony a few weeks ago (around when Sophie read Dimitar's mind), and the Council is being very secretive about it

Some gnomes reveal that they saw two Neverseen members dragging Lady Gisela into a cavern where the ogres are rumored to keep prisoners and burn the bodies of those they kill

Calla brings Sophie and Biana to Brackendale to investigate a possible plague outbreak, but all they find is a healthy-looking tree surrounded by a force field and a Neverseen member

They talk to Gethen, and Gethen hints that Keefe is somehow involved in Gisela's plots

Keefe eats fathomlethes to try to recover any missing memories related to Gisela's plans that may have been stolen from him

Dex breaks into the Lumenaria database and finds ancient scrolls revealing that the ogres have some form of leverage with the Council—something called "drakostomes" that the Council is afraid of. This is bad because it means that the Council may have had proof that the plague could happen all along and never warned the gnomes.

They go break into Exile to rescue Prentice, but it's a trap. The Council catches them. Sophie uses Kenric's cache to blackmail them into granting them pardons, though they decide that they will be sent to Exillium. The Council frees Prentice in exchange for Gethen, but Sophie is unable to heal his broken mind. He seems to be in a coma.

Silveny contacts Sophie and tells her that she's pregnant, which complicates things because it's not safe to move her now and the Neverseen have been trying to capture her

Dex figures out from the old treaty scrolls that the drakostomes are nematodes (microscopic roundworm parasites), and Calla hears him and realizes that the Council knew about the plague all along. The gnomes stop helping the elves and gather outside the Councillors' castles to protest. The Councillors explain that the gnomes were infected by the drakostomes (released by King Gowg of the ogres) thousands of years ago, and that the gnommish leaders made them promise to never tell the gnomes what happened, since there's no cure and they didn't want them to live in fear.

King Dimitar appears along with a cloaked figure, who reveals himself to be Fintan, who somehow survived the fire. Fintan explains that he overthrew Gisela because she was delaying a plan she created called the Lodestar Initiative. They reveal that there IS a cure, and offer it to the gnomes in exchange for becoming slaves to the ogres.

They sneak into Ravagog to steal the cure, but they find that the cure is fake. They escape, destroying the city in the process. Alvar reveals that he's part of the Neverseen.

Calla sacrifices herself to become a panakes tree, and her petals are able to cure the gnomes of the drakostomes.

The Council plans to go to war with the ogres

Sophie asks the Council to free Silveny so she can protect herself from those who want to capture her

Keefe steals Kenric's cache from Sophie and joins the Neverseen.

Prentice wakes up (but is not healed yet)

Lodestar:

Keefe tells Sophie that he joined the Neverseen to figure out their plans

They find a symbol in a disc sewn into a cloak left behind by Keefe that matches a symbol in a memory found in Prentice's mind

The Neverseen break into the registry files and delete all of Brant, Fintan, Ruy, and Alvar's files

They find out that shadowvapor has built up in Prentice's mind and is preventing them from healing him, so Tam lifts some veils of shadowvapor, which allows Sophie to read his mind and recover a symbol that looks like a star that's somehow connected to the reason he called swan song. She theorizes that it's a lodestar and thus connected to the Lodestar Initiative.

They search Candleshade and find a note from Keefe's mother asking him to find her to talk, along with a set of light leaping coordinates leading to the Paris Hideout where Sophie and Dex were kept by the Neverseen in book 1. They visit, and Tam finds a shadowprint in the shape of the Lodestar, and explains that there must have been a device on the ceiling projecting the mark.

Keefe overhears the Neverseen talking about kidnapping Sophie's family as the next phase of the Lodestar Initiative, so they fortify Havenfield and send Sophie away with her friends to stay at Rimeshire. Dex theorizes that Keefe was created as the Neverseen's version of Project Moonlark. They examine Alvar's scrolls and find codes corresponding to the arms of the Lodestar.

Turns out the Neverseen attacked Wylie, not Grady and Edaline. They interrogated him about his mother's light leap that killed her, thinking he had witnessed it, but he hadn't. He realizes her death may not have been an accident. They investigate and find out that Caprise Redek may have known something about it before she had her brain injury.

Keefe shows Sophie how Fintan has been bringing him to human cities and asking him about random people's feelings and asking which one he'd save and then writing stuff down in a notepad labelled "Criterion". This is important because Biana once heard Alvar talk about "Criterion" and "test subjects". They also find a memory of Gisela using a starstone hair pin to teleport to a door marked with "The star only rises and Nightfall" and taking blood from Keefe and putting it on a panel on the door, opening it. She tells him it's his legacy.

Keefe tells Sophie that Dimitar and Fintan are meeting with one another alone to "reconcile".

Caprise Redek gives them a starstone she found in Cyrah's stall and they find it leads to Candleshade, proving that Gisela killed Cyrah.

They find out that Gisela has escaped the ogre prison.

Keefe realizes that the Lodestar is a map of the Neverseen. hideouts. They travel through the Cimmerian mirror, where they find a Lodestar Device, which they use to travel to the Valkonian Neverseen Hideout. They capture Brant and Ruy and they're sent to the prison at Lumenaria along with Gethen.

Sophie goes to the Peace Summit at Lumenaria, but Fintan shows up and demands to participate. He talks about the threat of humans destroying the world or going to war with the Intelligent Species. Dimitar warns the other leaders not to trust him, and that Fintan coerced him into releasing the drakostomes. He demands a treaty allowing the ogres to be no longer considered an Intelligent Species and to be left alone. The other world leaders agree, and Fintan is brought to the prison with the rest of the Neverseen. They use their mental energy to bring down Lumenaria and escape, freeing another prisoner along with them.

Keefe leaves the Neverseen (bringing Kenric and Fintan's caches with him, which he stole) and realize that when the Neverseen talked about attacking Sophie's family, they may have been talking about her human family. They go to the human world and find them gone except for Amy.

Nightfall:

Amy is brought to stay in Atlantis

Sophie and Keefe call Gisela and she tells them that Lumenaria collapsing and the plague were part of Fintan's vision, not hers. She also says that Sophie was kidnapped in book 1 so she could be reprogrammed to work for them.

She sends them to Ravagog to deliver a message to King Dimitar. Keefe beats him in a duel, and as a reward, Dimitar gives them Gisela's starstone and assigns a bodyguard to Keefe, explaining that he needs to be kept alive so he can fulfill his legacy.

Gisela tells them that the everblaze in the human world helped her hatch the eggs of genetically engineered "gorgodons" designed to protect Nightfall, where Sophie's parents are being kept.

They find that the Neverseen have planted flowers at the sites of the everblaze, and that the flowers could be used to create a powerful sedative.

Marella turns out to be a pyrokinetic. She goes with them to investigate Nightfall using the starstone, but they find it abandoned. There are many doors labelled with different traits, like "courage" and "ingenuity". They think these were related to Fintan's Criterion. They find Alvar left there, bleeding and unconscious.

They find soporidine, a powerful ogre sedative, on Alvar's foot, and Lady Cadence tells them that it's produced by Bucullosisia bacteria which feed on nitrogen. They realize that the everblaze (which contains nitrogen) and the flowers could've been used to manufacture this in large quantities. They find more soporidine on Prentice's foot, but the Councillors have no knowledge of how it got there.

Gisela calls them and tells them that Fintan took Sophie's family to the original Nightfall, not Gisela's Nightfall. She gives them a set of ancient journals, and they figure out that the prisoner who the Neverseen released in Lodestar was named Vespera, and that she built a facility called Nightfall in Atlantis where she experimented on kidnapped humans thousands of years ago until she was arrested. She was trying to find a way for elves to commit acts of violence like humans can.

Keefe finds a couple pieces of metal that twist together into a key labelled "Archetype" in Candleshade.

Sophie heals Prentice but he doesn't remember anything.

They go to Nightfall, where they find Sophie's parents. They confront Vespera and Fintan. Vespera discusses morality and choices, giving Sophie a chance to sacrifice people to save more, but Sophie refuses, and Vespera concludes that Sophie is weak and unable to make the decisions she needs to. She reveals that Fintan thought Sophie's human parents were chosen because they were "ideal specimens", but Vespera found through her tests that that they weren't.

Gisela captures Vespera and convinces her to join her.

Fintan is captured, but demands that he not be harmed and that his mind not be read in exchange for him working to open his cache and revealing a supply of the antidote for soporidine.

Sophie's parents are returned to the human world, memories erased

Alvar wakes up but has lost his memory.

Flashback:

Alvar is moved to Everglen because the Council deems it to be safe since he's lost his memory, despite Fitz's insistence that he still poses a threat. Fallon Vacker agrees, pointing out that this is probably exactly what the Neverseen expects them to do.

Sophie realizes that she's naturally gifted with weapons and worries that the Black Swan designed her to be a natural killer.

They learn that the caches they have are fakes.

They find a memory of Gisela hinting that the Vacker family have a dark secret, and another memory of Keefe being sent to deliver an envelope stamped with a crescent moon and a star to a green door in the human world.

Silveny gives birth to twins. They're premature, but they realize they could save them by putting them in a troll hive. It turns out Luzia Vacker has been hiding troll hives on her properties to keep the trolls safe from the ogres. Initially, the hive was at Everglen, but then they abandoned that hive when Luzia moved to her new home.

Fintan requests a meeting with Sophie and Fitz. They go to talk to him in the ice prison where he's kept, and he tells them that Gisela was trying to recruit a human (the one at the green door, though it didn't go as planned) and that Vespera told him that she was going to show everyone the truth behind the Vacker legacy at the Celestial Festival. He asks to train Marella in pyrokinesis, because he knows she'll suffer without proper training.

On the night of the Celestial Festival, Alvar escapes. He regains his memory and opens the gate to Everglen to let the Neverseen in. He then opens the abandoned troll hive, releasing genetically engineered baby trolls which attack them. Fortunately, Fitz is able to trap Alvar inside a troll hive and prevent him from releasing any more trolls. They think Alvar is dead, but he escapes.

Gisela hits Greyfell and Silveny with a lethal dose of soporidine and refuses to provide the antidote unless Tam joins the Neverseen, which he does.

The alicorn babies hatch from the troll hive

Legacy:

Forkle theorizes that the Neverseen is trying to weaken the bonds between the species and cause a war so they can take over.

Tam says he's been ordered to kill Keefe

Keefe retrieves a memory of a human holding the letter he delivered to the green door

The Council appoints Sophie and her friends to the Nobility and form "Team Valiant" to show the elven world that they're taking action

They discuss the identity of her father, and how they know it's not Prentice, Forkle, or Kenric. They think it's Bronte, but he tells them they're wrong.

Nubiti tells Sophie that some dwarves left Loamnore to join the Neverseen, and that before they left, they took some of the magsidian in the city. Nubitit theorizes that magsidian is made from shadowflux, which is important because it could have something to do with why the Neverseen needed Tam.

They contact Tam and he sends a code that tells Linh she's in danger. Linh thinks the Neverseen is planning to capture her or injure her.

They visit Loamnore and find hidden pieces of magsidian in King Enki's throne room.

They find out that the human Keefe delivered the letter to is dead, struck by a bus in London. They find security camera footage of Gisela standing in front of Big Ben an hour after the accident.

They go to London and run into the Neverseen. Gisela hints that Keefe was the one to kill the man. Tam is there too, and they realize that he's being controlled by bonds of light around his wrists.

Sophie finds a memory of Gisela drinking something out of five glowing vials then a black bottle and convincing Cassius to do the same, promising that it will make him powerful and telling him to "embrace the change".

They go to Candleshade to look for the bottles and find Alvar hiding there. He's dying from the goo that was inside the troll hive. He knows something about the black bottles and what was inside them, but refuses to tell them how he knows. He tells them that Gisela did something to her and Cassius using the elements before she got pregnant that gave Keefe extra abilities, and that those abilities are the foundation of her entire plan. He also hints that Gisela may have a second ability that she's hiding. They let Alvar go and he light leaps away.

Sophie realizes that Oralie is her mother

Sophie receives a note from Gisela telling her to meet her at Loamnore with Keefe. They go to Loamnore and leave Keefe behind, but he sneaks along anyways. Gisela then tells Sophie that she's using a treatment called "Stellarlune" to bring out Keefe's full potential. She performs a procedure using shadowflux from Tam, light from Glimmer, magsidian, and ethertine to trigger the change, and Keefe collapses.

Gisela refuses to free Tam, and Glimmer betrays her because she doesn't like that she broke her promise to free him. She releases Tam from the light bonds and puts them on Gisela instead. Unfortunately, she escapes.

Unlocked:

Sophie and Oralie open Oralie's cache and find a memory of Kenric. He mentions something called "Elysian". We learn that Kenric had Oralie ask Fintan about stellarlune but found that Fintan knew nothing about it. Oralie thinks Kenric may have erased some of her memories. We also learn that Kenric knew that Oralie was Sophie's mother.

Keefe wakes up and discovers that he has polyglot abilities and can also control people by commanding them, detect abilities before they manifest, and possibly trigger them. He doesn't have control over his abilities and can't find a way to control them, so he leaves the lost cities to hide in the human world.

Glimmer brings Sophie and her friends to a Neverseen warehouse, where they find the caches and the archetype, but Glimmer taunts Sophie and convinces her that she's not being ruthless enough. Sophie sets fire to the warehouse and burns it all down, with the archetype inside. As she leaves, she draws a symbol of a flying moonlark on the ground.

[rayniscatstatue]

“Books and Cuddles”

Word count: 656

Prompts: 11. “Can I lay my head in your lap?”

25. “don't worry, i'll be here when you wake up.”

90. "Yes, it happened. No, it wasn't your fault."

Character relationships: Fitz Vacker and Dex Dizznne (romantic), Dex Dizznne and Biana Vacker (platonic)

Description: Fitz and Dex are outed for dating one day. It turns into chaos as everyone realises that Fitz will be the first Vacker to be a bad match. The reputation strike hits him harsh.

————————————————————————

My boyfriend had been stuck in his bed for days. Refusing to leave it. No matter how hard Biana tried.

She had tried everything, besides get me to come over. Fitz had told her he doesn't want me there. But I need yo be there for him.

"Dex, your going to have to try yourself." Biana came up to me, putting a leaping crystal to Everglen in my hand.

"Is he that bad?" I ask on concern.

"Yeah, I can hear him crying himself to sleep every night. It shatters me." I can only imagine Fitz crying himself to sleep. The image refusing to leave my brain.

"Okay." Determination in my voice as I hold the crystal up to the light. I let the light drag me away to Everglen as I glitter outside the gates.

All I have to do is lick the sensor since Della and Alden added me, Sophie, Keefe, Linh and Tam onto it.

I make my way up to the door as I knock on it. Della opens it.

"Hey, Dex! Come to try get Fitz out his room I see?" She asks.

"Yeah, Biana gave me a crystal." I shrug as she lets me in. I start to guide myself to his bedroom. I am starting to know the layout of this place like the back of my own hand.

The hallways being like a maze. But a maze I have solved many times.

I find myself outside my boyfriend's door as I lift my hand to knock.

"Biana leave me alone!" I hear his voice.

I open the door. "Nice to know that your dating your sister." I laugh to myself.

His face flushes red. "Shut up, Dex."

"Love you too Wonder Boy!" I close the door behind me.

"Why are you here? We shouldn't even be seen together because of the scandal." Fitz stares up at the ceiling.

"Yes, it happened. No, it wasn't your fault." I start to sit down next to him.

He leans his head against my rib cage as Is start to brush my hand through his hair.

"Fine, can you kiss me?" He looks up at me with pouty eyes.

"Sure." I roll my eyes as I lean down to press my lips against his. My hand still tangled in his hair as the older boy pulls me closer. "Needy." I pull back, going back to kissing him.

"Shut up." We both finally pull back, I can see how swollen his lips now are. "Can I lay my head on your lap?" He looks up to ask.

"Of course." He sits up as he moves over to lay down in my lap. I run my hands through his hair. "Just don't cry yourself to sleep tonight."

"Ugh, Biana told you about that?"

"Yeah." I smirk down at him. "She was the one that gave me the crystal to get here." I shrug.

“I’m tired.” Fitz mumbles as he grabs into my hands. Holding them in his own.

“Then sleep.” I say.

“But I don’t want you to leave me.” He looks up at me. A sad look plastered on his face before me.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be here when you wake up.” I lean back against the headboard, grabbing a book off of Fitz’s bedside table. It’s one he rambles about a lot.

“Night.” He whispers under his breath.

“It’s technically the afternoon, Wonder boy.” I start to slip through the pages of the book as Fitz drifts off to sleep.

A sleep without crying himself into for the first time in a few weeks.

“Biana Vacker.” I whisper into my imparter.

“Hey.” She answers.

“He’s asleep.” I turn the imparter to show Fitz asleep in my lap.

“Thank you Dex.” I see the girl smile.

“I’d do anything for him. Don’t worry.” I spend the rest of my day chatting to Biana on the imparter as Fitz lays there in my arms.

————————————————————————

It’s quite short but anyways-

[bookwyrminspiration]

I’ve been thinking about it, and considering elves all don’t age and unless they’re somehow killed in an accident or murder which is rare they continue to live indefinite life-spans… why have we not heard or seen anything about Grady or Edaline’s parents? Wouldn’t they want to meet their adopted grandchild? Wouldn’t Grady and Edaline want to talk to their parents at some point? I’m sure it’s just something Shannon hasn’t thought about it but it’s very much irking me now

great question! given that this world is structured so differently, I think I can guess a few possible reasons for this, but who knows what Shannon's actual explanations for a question like this are.

given what we know about the elven social world, there doesn't seem to be a huge emphasis on knowing your grandparents or relatives aside from being able to name them/identify them if you're in an important family, hence Fitz being able to list off the exact number of greats Fallon is in relation to him. But it was shown that their family didn't exactly approve of the trouble Alvar had gotten up to and had kinda shunned that generation of Vackers.

So a possible in-story explanation is that the Ruewens have determined that Sophie is too much trouble to meet, and that they don't actually consider her to be a part of their family. She's just an unfortunate addition to the family tree that they'll ignore and move on from. However, the Ruewen family is very different from the Vacker family, so I don't think this is necessarily the case.

We could also explain it by saying their indefinite life span doesn't necessitate frequent visits, as they have all of eternity to get around to it. Sophie's been with them for like 2-3 years of the centuries the Ruewen family has been around. But I don't think this is the actual reason.

My guess is that it's because it's a lot of work for Shannon. She already has a huge host of characters, and adding in more is more trouble than its worth. The indefinite lifespan of the elves and the structure of their cities affects their lives and relationships in ways that are hard to predict! We have to guess--Shannon has to guess what makes the most sense, but this is only one worldbuilding detail amongst an entire plot, so its no wonder she skipped over it.

Yes, it would make sense for Sophie to meet all of the Ruewens and their extended family, but the effort it would take to create all those characters and incorporate them into the story isn't worth the effort, though it would give insight into the world. Yes, it would make sense for Grady and Edaline to want to talk to their parents, but their parents don't play a role in the story that affects the progression of the plot, so they'd slow it down and take up limited space Shannon wants to use for something else. All the adults and family we know have a purpose--like information or something--that helps Sophie do her "job," so unless the Ruewen relatives have that, it's not worth it to bring them into the story.

feel free to be irked about it! A natural consequence of creating an entire world--especially one that functions differently from our own--is trying to find a balance between that world and the story you want to tell, and everyone's preferences is different. For example, Sophie not meeting her grandparents doesn't bother me as much because I don't really know my grandparents either! I have so many relatives that apparently exist, but I've never even seen photos. But for those who might have closer family ties, it stands out more and makes less sense. What's realistic changes from person to person!

The implications of a species that never dies and just continues on forever are impossible to fully realize, especially in just a 10 book series. Things like space and family relations are kind of pushed to the side for the plot, leaving things like this a little unsatisfying.

I hope that makes sense! Again, it's my personal reasoning as for why it might not be included from both an in-story and writer perspective, but I would be interested in meeting any of the Ruewen's extended family!

[thegeminiwitchbitch]

Year of the Witch

Temperance Alden 4/5 Published in 2020

As someone who is pretty new to her Practice, I am very happy to have found this book. Going into my practice I was always informed about the 8 Wiccan Sabbats and that most everyone observed them. Not that I really knew if everyone did, but it was a widespread piece of information that, when you are first entering into the craft, you believe. Temperance Alden did a wonderful job of changing my mind on the Sabbats in the best way. She helped me to realize that I don’t actually need to practice the Sabbats if I don’t find myself attached to them. Not only does The Year of the Witch address that you do not need to celebrate only the Wiccan Sabbats, but it gives you insight on how to adapt the Wheel of the Year to your practice and make it work for you. There are my positives, there are a few negatives that I need to give as well. Yes, she helped me realize that I did not need to only practice the 8 Wiccan Sabbats, however, I am sure that other books say the same thing. The way it is written was a bit confusing for me. There is a lot of information but at the same time, everything is glossed over. Now that could be put down to just wanting to give an overview of different topics that can help one to form their own Wheel of the Year, but in some places, there was just not enough information to make it make sense. Following my point above nearly half of the book, 40% is about the 8 Wiccan Sabbats. I went into this book thinking that it was supposed to take us away from those Sabbats and the ways we can make our own Wheel. While it did this, it seems a bit redundant to make nearly half the book about the Sabbats themselves. Now I understand that she does celebrate 6/8 of the Sabbats herself, however, she states at the beginning of the book, “My goal with this book is to give you what you’ll need to create your own personalized wheel of the year. In the following pages, we will explore the basic concepts of intuitively guided witchcraft, its role in the wheel of the year, the traditional wheel of the year, climate change, and more.” Yes, she states that she will be discussing the Wiccan Wheel, however, I see no point in dedicating such a large chunk of her book to correspondences and history lessons about the 8 Sabbats that we can find elsewhere. The other information given is in such short bursts that it is hard to gather any information out of them. There are a few points that she addresses that are longer and do delve deeper but they are far and few in between and do not reach the depth of time that she put into the 8 Wiccan Sabbats. Overall I the book fell short of my expectations. I am also unable to recommend this to a true beginner witch, as it would be easier for you to understand it with prior knowledge of the Wheel of the Year. Do I recommend it though, yes just be sure to gain insight on the Wheel of the Year before reading it.

[cyndecreativity]

Day 29 - Royalty At Its Finest

Cars – “Back up!”

Idania is taken up to the Soaring Continent of the Libra on a gondola. Prince Andre throws his political weight in order to procure a gondola car all for them.

---

Idania looked out the window of the carriage to the long lines of people, all different constellations, leading to the gondola. The door opened, interrupting her view, and Prince Andre moved to step out first. He dropped to the ground and stretched a bit before turning his charm on her, gloved hand raised to assist her in stepping from the carriage. She returned the smile, very aware of her role, and moved to climb from the carriage, using his hand and the door to guide her. Once securely on the ground, she turned to check that her stinger muzzle had not been jostled, but the prince kept her hand firmly in his. She barely caught a glance at her tail, barely registered the muzzle, when she focused on the Virgo prince.

He smiled to her. Her skin crawled. “Don’t worry, I’ll have the books you purchased sent to the Virgo manor. They will undoubtedly be placed on a different gondola car. Come.”

She heard shouting from behind her and watched young Libra, wingless at such a young age, hurry to collect the packages and cases off the back of the carriage. Her brow furrowed, reminded of a young man whose wings never came in, stuck as deformed lumps on his back. More shouts carried over the crowd and she watched other Libra, winged adults, wave in response. Some of these adults fluffed their feathers, while others could not. She had heard stories about them from the Master-At-Arms. She didn’t want to believe the cruelty real.

The prince led her up a few steps onto the gondola platform. Whistles blew as uniformed Libra attempted to stem the flow of bodies. “Back up!” A collective groan drifted over the crowd and Andre forged ahead, oblivious.

Idania felt herself pull a face, disgusted at the scene. As Acting Regent, Andre had the authority and clout to simply take a gondola car for himself, regardless of the crowd. He expected it, even. But would her prince? She turned to scan the line of carriages.

“He was taken on ahead, my dear.” Andre squeezed her hand tightly, almost hurting her.

She offered an apologetic smile and moved with him into the gondola car. Once the door closed, he released her hand. He had procured for them a private compartment on the gondola with enough room for four people. He sat down by the door and she moved as far from him as possible to the window. It did not take long for the gondola to begin moving, to ferry them up to the Soaring Continent, and Alden’s ultimate fate. She knew him to be innocent and hoped that the evidence she carried might be enough to save him.

[thecaffeinebookwarrior]

My Top 10 List of Short Story Anthologies

As many of you know, I write short fiction.  You may have even read my published work, such as The Bear, The Undertaker’s Apprentice, and The Young Immortal.

As such, it’s really no surprise I’ve been getting a lot of anons asking me where to start when it comes to writing short fiction.  I have a few tips, but the best place to begin -- as with any form of writing -- is to consume and analyse as much content as possible.  This is what I’ve been doing for the past year, and it’s what allowed me to begin writing and publishing shorter works.  

So, without further ado, here are my top ten anthologies (in no particular order.)  I hope this helps, and happy writing!  <3

1.)  Get In Trouble, by Kelly Link

If every fairy tale and every episode of The Twilight Zone had a kid, you’d get Kelly Link’s Get In Trouble.  

A motel caters to Fair Folk.  A lonely teenager attends a convention for superheroes to find the man she’s been catfishing.  Multinational astronauts swap ghost stories.  Floating waitresses catch up with old flames.  Children are born with two shadows, or none at all.

Each story is a tangible “pocket universe,” bubbling with dark, joyful magic as rich as good, black coffee.  It will leave you overflowing with emotions you won’t be able to describe.  

2.)  Einstein’s Beach House, by Jacob M. Appel

If you want side-splitting hilarity coupled with gut-wrenching emotion and human complexity, this is the book for you.  Each story explores the manner in which we deceive ourselves and one another, the complications of forming relationships with equally flawed, fallible humans, and the ceaseless momentum of time, actions, and consequences.  

My personal favorite is  “La Tristesse Des Hérissons” -- literally, “The Sadness of Hedgehogs” -- in which a dysfunctional couple adopts an allegedly depressed hedgehog.  I actually wrote an annotation about it for graduate school.  You can read it here.

3.)  Vampires in the Lemon Grove, by Karen Russel

An elderly, bickering vampire couple sucks lemon juice to quell their thirst for blood.  An antarctic tailgating party.  United States president Rutherford B. Hayes wakes up in the body of a horse.

This is a book that stimulates the senses and the soul. You can taste the tang of the lemons with its titular vampires, soak up the sunlight in their grove. There were times when I felt as though I could put my nose to the pages and breath in the scent of its stories, like a strong herbal tea. 

Russell accomplishes a lot with this resplendent anthology, a series of surrealistic, emotionally poignant stories.  She introduces concepts you’d never have thought of, and will never forget.  It is, in my opinion, a must-read. 

4.)  Jesus’ Son, by Denis Johnson

Johnson taps into something primordial with this short, powerful, hilarious collection.  He takes us to a dark, ugly, primitive part of humanity that no one wants to acknowledge, and shows us the hope and beauty there. All of which is narrated by a perpetually drug-addled gentleman named Fuckhead.  If you can stomach it, I highly recommend it.

5.)  A Field Guide to Murder and Fly Fishing, by Tim Weed

I’m lucky enough to work with Tim Weed in my graduate program, who has mentored my writing and, yes, signed my copy of this book.  

Each story is visceral, wickedly funny, and emotionally potent.  They immerse us in settings as distant as Rome, Granada, and the Amazon, and makes them feel as tangible as our own back yard.  The language is beautiful, painting scenes and settings as vividly as watercolors.  With each narrative, the tension gradually tightens, a taut string ready to snap. 

His characters are relatable, familiar, and human, even when -- hence the title -- they are committing acts as violent and questionable as murder.  It is an amazing read. 

6.)  Homesick For Another World, by Ottessa Moshfegh

Stories about human loneliness and the endless struggle to belong, told with crackling humor and absurdity.  

My personal favorite is “Bettering Myself,” told from the perspective of a moral and emotional trainwreck of an elementary school teacher.  “Most people have had anal sex,” she casually informs her class.  “Don’t look so surprised.”  Or, “My boyfriend and I don’t use condoms. That’s what happens when you trust somebody.”  

The best part of every story, however, is the closing line, which invariably provides an emotional punch to the gut and will leave you staring silently at the wall for a few minutes.  It is a stunning, if slightly depressing, examination of the oft-ignored unpleasantries of the human condition.

7.)  Make Something Up:  Stories You Can’t Unread, by Chuck Palahniuk

The name says it all.  This one is not for the faint of heart. 

If you’re at all familiar with Palahniuk’s most famous work -- an obscure little ditty called Fight Club -- you’ll come prepared for his angry, explosive cocktail of pitch black comedy and satire.  

Learning that Palahniuk is a gay man made me appreciate his less-than-loving parody of heterosexual culture, toxic masculinity, bigotry, and violence.  I particularly like his modern renditions of Aesop’s Fables, in which anthropomorphic animals grapple with contemporary, extremely adult struggles.

An unexpected gem is Palahniuk’s awareness of Fight Club’s iconic status, and his countless references to it in his stories.

8.)  Unaccompanied Minors, by Alden Jones

Alden Jones is another fabulous author I got to work with for graduate school, who introduced me to this book in a public reading.

As the title suggests, these stories are united by -- you guessed it -- unaccompanied minors making morally questionable, dangerous, and all-around bad decisions.  But they are portrayed in such a loving, human, empathetic manner that you can’t help but understand everything they do. 

You will relate heavily to every character in this book, whether you want to or not.  And that’s exactly why you need to read it.

9.)  Brief Interviews With Hideous Men, by David Foster Wallace

This is one of those books that’s just a little too aware of how intelligent it is.  If you can stomach that, you’re in for some great, innovative, and, yes, intelligent reading.  It’s also hilarious, in case the man who compulsively screams “victory to the forces of democratic freedom!” every time he orgasms isn’t any indication. 

10.)  American Housewife, by Helen Ellis

This is some of the best satire I have ever read, all centralizing around frustrated housewives losing their shit.  Within the first page, you will be treated to lines like: 

“Inspired by Beyonce, I stallion-walk to the toaster.” 

“I go to the grocery store and discover that everyone else has gone to the grocery store and as I maneuver my cart through the Chips and Nuts traffic, I get grocery store rage.  I see a lost child, and assume it’s an angry ghost.”

“Back home, I get a sickening feeling and am relieved to find it’s just my husband’s shirt hung the wrong way in a closet.  I break into a sweat when I find a sharpie cap but not the marker.  I answer the phone, and scream obscenities at an automated call.”

Yes, that’s all within the first page of text.  It only gets better from there.  I cannot stress to you exactly how hilarious this book is, and I would pay big money to see Chris Fleming from Gale play at least one of the housewives in a big screen adaption.

[kainfamilyfortune]

Silas - Journal Entry #32-34

Packing my bags was a more difficult process than I imagined; I ended up consolidating many of my past possessions - sneaking away in the night, finding a pit outside the village and lighting robes, ink, and even past books ablaze, thinking that they had served their purpose, that they would not be much use to anyone. Ramblings of a dead man. I was able to get it down to my ceremonial robes and matching knife, my wand, the clothes on my back and four books - two of which were my latest works in Pandaria and one was my current journal, and the final tome was my first publication I had the honor of working on with Dorene, a green hardcover with silver filigree, ‘Elements of Medicine’. I secured everything in my satchel, gazing at the tear where the forsaken badge used to be. A few nights would persist as I fixed my satchel, burning items slowly as to not draw too much attention... before the missive was released. 

I had no idea that war parties still ventured as far as these lands, but I kept a watchful eye as they made their way through the quiet village, morning mist still surrounding the country-side just before dawn. Pulling my hood up, I exited my hut to see what they had left for the Coalition’s eyes. A finely embossed sheet of parchment pinned to the bulletin board.

‘Wanted: For Defecting and Inspiring Rebellion against the Horde

In regards to conspirators, the Desolate Council of The Undercity, Thirty Thousand Gold will be awarded on delivery of each perpetrator.’ 

The list started...

‘Lyndow Callow, Edmundo Alden, Silas Kain, Dorene Denholm.’ 

Were we all of whom that was left? Or... All that defected and decided to not to cower in fear at the might of the Banshee Queen.

‘If found, these individuals are considered to be highly dangerous and manipulative, capture dead or alive and deliver to Valley of Honor, Origrimmar for verification and payment. For the Horde.

                                                         Nathanos Blightcaller’

Of course I tore down the missive immediately, pocketing it - however incriminating as it was, at least I now had a list to go off of as far as who to track down. Now it was a matter of where to find them... Light only knows where they’d go into hiding, I was only truly sure of two relationships. Professor Alden, whom I worked at length with on studying his recovered Zul’Aman artifacts in the Ghostlands. Perhaps he has chosen to hide in plain-sight as he always had; and Dorene Denholm who introduced me to the apothecary and medicines. Last assignment she was given was cultivating rare herbs in Sholazar Basin.

33.

Some time has passed. I left no clues besides the memories I had with the Coalition, I hoped that they would understand. I started a few days travel, following the roving war party, tearing every poster they hung in their tracks. They led me all the way out to Mistfall Village, where they headed to the capitol portals within Mogu’shan Palace. At least that is what I assume. I stayed the night, laying low, eavesdropping upon a few sin’dorei speaking of selling passage off the northern coast. If they had the boat and man-power, that was all I needed. 

After buying them a few rounds of drinks and asking where they were headed I had paid for my passage to the Ghostlands, with a short stop in Tol Barad. The journey would take a week, that they were leaving before dawn by yak to where they had docked in Binan village. They didn’t ask my name or have questions... yet. Good. I needed to seek refuge in a neutral spot, Light knows who would sell me out for gold at this point in time.

The boat was a small fishing vessel, although nets were exchanged for extra storage and what seemed like a kite on the hull of the craft, for what they called ‘Para-kiting’ which they tried to sell me on, but I wasn’t one for heavy winds, nor heights. The crew totaled five in all, who seemed earnest in their tourist ventures - over the breakfast as we were casting off, I learned of their history, traveling back and forth between capitols to earn a little extra coin in a fishing venture gone south between the crew and their old captain, who was smuggling goods and making shady deals without the crew’s knowledge. One day, he made a wrong deal and a rival group of pirates came after them all. They made a deal to exile their captain and trade it for freedom and now they all had equal say, and traded fish for... well tourists. 

Cere, a jovial sin’dorei female with amber-red hair, golden eyes and pointed nose exclaimed in her light airy trill of a voice over the next three days about the other members and how they came to be friends over the years, some excommunicating from their factions after fighting wars they longer believed in, while others were simple farmers, and her, a former escort, wanting to leave her shackles from talk of politics and a fake smile she would wear, to please those around her. 

We docked in Tol Barad on the fourth day; the crew told me they needed to resupply on some goods and seek some information about a potential hire they were corresponding with, and that I should try for the Heart of the Raven - an inn and tavern just in town. I walked up the cobblestone stairs, snow still gathered in the silent town - only a few shops and houses lined the streets along with a fountain which had frozen over. The trees stood with no leaves - extending bare towards the brightly clouded sky. My eyes followed the path to a warmth coming from the larger two, maybe three story building with a small raven upon it’s sign, swinging in a light rush of wind - creaking slightly as I let the door hit me on my way in. As the crackling of the fire sparked my senses and the waft of ginger and honey greeted me, I knew I had found something special. 

34.

I spent the most of the afternoon here, listening to the gentle rhythm of their guitarist and making notes in my journal, indulging my thirst for a change, Stormsong honey grapefruit ginger soda. Simply divine, although my thoughts were no where near on the same wavelength. I mulled over where I was to find Edmundo first, Dorene was likely fine for now... But it has been so long since I’ve been to the Ghostlands, let alone Eastern Kingdoms. Since I watched Lordaeron from afar, slowly being swallowed away by the blight. The retaliation. That was in the past now, and I would do well not to think of it, but I could not help but hear voices linger and pull me in all directions. Spirits screaming. I drank a heavy swig, attempting to wipe it from my mind, when Cere entered the establishment, asking me if it would be alright if we could extend our stay here, as one of the crew injured himself. I did not ask questions, only offering my healing experience which was politely declined.

I paid the barkeep for a suite and rested my head. Although sleep would never find me, pretending was never much of an issue, as my reveries filled the space. I was in a forest, dark tainted grounds that had once been a lively autumn color pallet. Eversong Woods. Why my daydreams led me here, I had no idea, but I sensed the light guiding my thoughts. The large pillars of ivory, gold gilded decor - deteriorating and fading in color after the march of scourge. My skin materialized into dust that flowed from my hand out in front of me, ushering me forward to follow, leading me inside the old tower.

The inside was pitch black, but from what I could make out it was nearly empty with the exception of an unlit brazier and two end chairs resting across from one another. The vaulted ceilings echoed and the wind rustling in the large entry way wafted abandoned webs of spiders that had long since been gone. I sat in the chair closest to me, the feeling of anxiety rose up once again and the brazier lit with a familiarity I have not felt in a millennia. The same flame erupted upon my death as the soothing voice struck a deal. A deal that would lead me here, but why? As she spoke again the chill went through every crevice of dust compacting to form my spine and skin. I could feel my jaw clench and the dust shifted off my form, floating like a tornado around the fel green flame. 

“You have done well Silas.” A chuckle surrounded my senses, and the panic started to heighten. I tried to grip the arm rests to throw myself out of the chair but my hands were gone. I was frozen as more and more bone dust swirled around the fire. My legs too were gone and I was fading. The last thing I saw was the reconstruction of a human girl in the opposite chair, smiling wickedly before my vision cut to black. I couldn’t help but scream.

The knock on my door was sudden as I came back to reality - immediately checking my hands which were once again whole; One of the staff greeted me at the door to ensure that I was alright. I was gasping for every breath I could hold in my lungs as I told them that it was nothing, that I had just had an accident. The illidari offered help which I declined as she nodded slowly and left, obviously looking worried. I laid my head once again upon the bed but decided against daydreaming again. The only question on my mind was who that girl was. And what she had to do with any of this.

((Special Thanks to @heartoftheravenwra for giving me a scenic, faction neutral spot to call home for the last few weeks. RP here is awesome and I heavily recommend their Monday Night Mixers! There will be more to come as Silas makes his journey north. Apologies for the longer posting frequency as well. Quality > Quantity, since work has been wiping my booty as of lately. Cheers!))

[abbajane]

This is a week of new beginnings. I’m back doing the things that make me feel good, so I guess my little depressive espiode the past two weeks is officially over! I getting some exercise every day, I’m sleeping well, I’m eating better, I’m avoiding sugar, I’m back on my blog, and today I did a craft, which I haven’t done in ages. Mercury in retrograde is messing with other aspects of my life (see the glass pitcher I destroyed by putting in the fridge full of hot tea…) but not here!

My mom and I spent all day out on the back porch, she reading and me annoying her, so I decided to work on something productive. Using an old nature book, I made these cute bookmarks, double-sided and laminated. Directions below!

  I found an old copy of Peterson First Guides: Mammals by Peter Alden that a patron had donated to us at the library. I loved the beautiful illustrations and the book was just thin enough and organized just right for me to imagine cutting bookmarks out of it, so I took it home and got to work! I imagine any pocket field guide for nature would work well for this craft. You can even cut out pages of an old book that’s just text and have a really cool end product.

I unbound the book by removing the outer cover and the glue that kept the four smaller books together. Then I cut the strings that kept the pages bound and voila, the pages came out perfectly easy.

Once I had all the pages loose, I used a scrap booking cutter like this to cut the pages in half. Luckily the illustrations had text on the back and not another illustration. Some pages I cut a little closer to the image, but I would recommend just cutting them once, because I ran into a problem later with the illustration pages being different sizes.

Next, I paired up my pages so the bookmarks would have an image on both sides. Some were paired on topic (ex. two rabbit pages for my mom’s bookmarks) and some I had to pair based on size, because I didn’t make them uniform. Some pages paired up and one was a little smaller than the other, which didn’t ruin them, but definitely made them a little messier to my perfectionist’s eye. I used a small piece of tape to keep them stuck together, text to text, so they would stay in place.

I placed my bookmarks on 8.5×11″ laminating sheets and then used my Scotch laminator to literally seal the deal. I was able to get three on each sheet. They look so cute when I got them cut out and finished up! I think I might punch holes in the tops of some and tie a silk ribbon on them for an extra touch.

I’m going to give a few as gifts, and use the rest to keep tabs in all those books I start and never finish…

  I sat outside in spring all day and made these bookmarks. Check it out! This is a week of new beginnings. I'm back doing the things that make me feel good, so I guess my little depressive espiode the past two weeks is officially over!

[tvserieshub]

Most people have a very bad habit of classifying large chunks of people in binary terms as either all “bad” or all “good.” But the reality is that there is ALWAYS a mix of good and bad people, as well as good and bad IN people. In The Expanse, many viewers have taken the side of the Belters. Some, because they love certain characters, like Naomi and Miller. Others, because as a class, the Belters are the clear underdogs. Generally, they risk life and limb for rich corporate owners who apparently couldn’t care less about them, either individually or as a group. Fans of Earthers tend to like Holden or, really, Avasarala. They have exposed their imperfections, as well. Amos is a fascinating Earther, beloved and feared all at once.  Martian fans like Alex, or more recently, Bobbie. The Mars faction is a little less developed than the Earther or Belter factions in terms of quantities of deep characters or back stories (so far). This episode really digs into the issue of the risk of thinking of a group as all “good” or “bad,” especially if you unequivocally favor Belters.

The recap begins here:

The scene opens on a field and a person who is tending a crop. A little girl waves goodbye to the tender, who is her father. An alert sounds, and the pieces of the destroyed mirror come crashing through the domes protecting the crops from Ganymede’s nonexistent atmosphere. The scientist wakes up among quite a lot of injured people, and immediately he checks on his precious cargo. The injured man is on a Ganymede refugee ship, which is headed to Tycho. A surly Belter hands out supplies, as the man frantically looks for his child, who is not on this ship. Doris (Grace Lynn Kung), another refugee – indistinguishable from any of the OTHER refugees, greets Dr. Praxidike Meng (Terry Chen). It’s clear that Doris saved Prax’s life. Prax is distraught that his daughter, Mei, is not just missing, but feared dead.

On Tycho, Holden (Steven Strait) and Johnson (Chad Coleman) question Diogo (Andrew Rotilio), who clearly views Johnson as non-Belter. Staz (Alden Adair) tries to interfere, but he is held off by Naomi (Dominique Tipper). Diogo says that Johnson should go back to Earth, that Dawes will be the Fist of the Belters. Alex (Cas Anvar) had suggested that Naomi take out someone and Naomi told him that he doesn’t get to decide who she kills. They take Diogo off to a holding cell.

Drummer (Cara Gee) shows Holden and Johnson system information that shows how Dawes escaped and that someone overrode security. Drummer is in charge of security, so there’s a serious question about what happened. They receive an incoming communication from Dawes (Jared Harris). It’s clear that Dawes was the person who sheltered and sponsored Johnson. Dawes feels that Johnson is acting as an Earther, not a Belter and that they have to take drastic action. He tells Johnson he has stolen his secret and is giving it to the Belt.

Doris and Prax discuss their future and what to do. They note that the Belter crewman doesn’t seem to like to be a good Samaritan. Doris wants Prax to come with her to Mars.

Johnson, Drummer, Naomi and Holden discuss that they have more information than Dawes does, and they disclose that Cortazar was aware that there was more Protomolecule than what was destroyed and it was after Eros was destroyed. Drummer volunteers to help Naomi obtain direct access to the antenna so she can collect and analyze the data Cortazar had obtained. There is a degree of concern over Drummer’s loyalty because she is security (which was breached) and she’s facilitating access to the antenna. Naomi goes to check on the sample that she knows wasn’t destroyed. Holden tells Naomi that he’s sorry he didn’t tell her about the existence of more Protomolecule. She’s frustrated and leaves Holden behind.

Alex catches up with Amos (Wes Chatham), who looks like 5 miles of bad road. Alex asks Amos for help and he says “no,” which shocks Alex.

Dawes’ message is being played to Belters, which incites them.

On the refugee ship, the crappy Samaritan tells the passengers that all the Inners are being transferred to ships to take them back home. Prax decides to go with them, but the Samaritan says he can’t, it is for Inners only. Doris says she can stay, but Prax encourages her to go. They say goodbye through the airlock window, and to Prax’s (and the entire viewership’s) horror, the Inners are spaced. The Belter Samaritan tells Prax that Inners destroyed Ganymede and that he’s lucky he’s a Belter. One technical note. The Expanse is remarkably faithful to what happens in space. Doris suffocates and freezes, rather than exploding.

Drummer explains that Fred has always had the Belters’ best interests at heart and Naomi gets Drummer to explain her background. Drummer worked with Dawes and Dawes rescued Johnson from drinking himself to death after the Anderson Station incident. Drummer says Dawes has a unique view of the Belter situation. They get the data and discover that there is Protomolecule on Ganymede Station. (Viewers who have read the books will note that the sequence involving Prax and Ganymede is not the same as it is handled in the book, but it is faithful to the concept of what was covered.)

Johnson, Holden, Naomi and Drummer discuss what it means that the Protomolecule exists on Ganymede. It was aware when hostilities broke out between Earth and Mars, and it learns.

Prax’s refugee ship arrives, and a crewman advises they will be ID checked and cleared, and he indicates on his handheld that an algorithm is being bypassed.

Prax desperately tries to convince a medic of what happened on the refugee ship, but he doesn’t know the name of the ship. She tells him she knows it was wrong but, without further info, she can’t do anything, to be glad he survived and maybe he’ll know some other refugee.

Holden and Naomi try to figure out who on Ganymede was involved with Protomolecule. They narrow the list of people who were on Ganymede and have the appropriate qualifications and Strickland (Ted Atherton) is identified. They query who was connected to him, and Prax and Mei show up, because Mei (Leah Jung) was a patient of Strickland. Prax is on the station, but Mei’s whereabouts are unknown.

There are a huge amount of people on Tycho, and it’s straining the station. A group of Belters, led by Staz, invade the command room, intent upon deploying the nukes to Earth.

Prax adds Mei’s picture to the wall of the missing. Holden and Naomi see and grab Prax. Prax panics, thinking that they think he knows about the spacing, but they, of course, think that he is involved with Protomolecule. Naomi (FOOLISHLY!!) opens up his container, but it’s just a soy bean.

The Belters who invaded the command deck, kill a crew member and then shoot Drummer, because they won’t give them the launch codes.

Amos is using the system to search for Lydia Maalouf. This is the lady he mentioned when he spoke with Cortazar about his guilt. Alex catches up with Amos and is trying to figure out what his problem is. He says Amos only cares about himself (Amos amusingly notes isn’t that everyone’s problem if we’re being honest?) Alex provokes Amos, and Amos attacks Alex, coming close to killing him, and Alex openly wonders what happened to him! They both notice that the nukes are being accessed.

Prax tells Naomi and Holden about Mei and her health needs. Naomi and Holden figure out the Strickland nexus is really Mei. Naomi notes that Prax should have access to Mei’s monitor feed, and answers “no” when asked if she had any children. Prax accesses the feed on her handheld and sees that Strickland took Mei out of the clinic before the attack. They know that Strickland knew the battle was coming and went to get Mei. Alex calls Holden to tell him about the nuke problem.

Fred tells Staz that Earth will shoot down the missiles and then destroy Tycho. Staz is fine with that because then Tycho will be fuel for the revolution. Amos, suited up, heads outside the station. Holden tells Amos that Naomi has almost overridden the air controls. Amos is there to remotely access the air system. He cuts the oxygen and although Staz tries to kill Fred and Drummer, Fred knocks the gun away and they all pass out.

Alex and Holden burst in to help the folks in the control room. Fred says “Drummer first,” because they are besties. Alex helps Drummer out and as they go by Staz, she yanks Alex’s gun and shoots Staz and the other turncoat crewman right between the eyes, and then stumps off. She’s the very definition of badass.

Amos settles Prax into his quarters and ensures he has mag boots. He explains that Prax is a guide, not a guest. And, he says that looking for Prax’s daughter is a good thing. His encounter with Amos leaves Alex to think about his family and what he has done for them.

Naomi asks Jim why he went to Cortazar’s quarters and Jim says he went to kill him. Naomi says that isn’t who Jim is. Jim says he needs Naomi to help him to get himself back when this is all done, and they kiss. Jim has to go to get Fred Johnson’s permission to leave. Fred wants any Protomolecule sample brought back to him, but Jim refuses. Fred says if they don’t, then don’t come back – no free anything. Jim is not sure Fred will still be in charge when he gets back. Fair point. Jim says Fred’s not a part of it anymore, and Fred releases them.

Grade: A

This was a completely packed episode. Although they were always evident, the fault lines between the Belters and the Earthers have deepened to an unsustainable level. It’s provoking the very worst behavior, and every time people do their worst, it just causes terrible repercussions. This episode made quite a few Belters look extremely bad. The Belter on the refugee ship spacing completely innocent people, and the Belters who are willing to send nuclear missiles to blast Earth (despite the fact that there are BILLIONS of innocent people there, as well) honestly represent the worst of humanity. Personalizing the impact of awful actions makes everyone realize the consequences, but it doesn’t seem to be enough to stop people from behaving dreadfully. This episode had room for personal development, as well, as we see Amos still working through his issues resulting from interacting with kids and just how close he is to being out of control. The episode ratcheted up the tension by continuing to provide so many indicators that Drummer was the traitor, only to have her satisfyingly vindicated.

The effects continue to be stunning, as even the lowly refugee ship looks gorgeous. The handhelds are entirely believable and all the displays look crisp and clean. It’s such a pleasure to see such attention to detail, up to and including the poor dying and dead spaced Inners.

Next episode: “The Weeping Somnambulist” airs on Wednesday, March 22 at 10 pm on Syfy.

The Expanse (S02E08) “Pyre” Most people have a very bad habit of classifying large chunks of people in binary terms as either all "bad" or all "good." But the reality is that there is ALWAYS a mix of good and bad people, as well as good and bad IN people.

[adrian-paul-botta]

The Movies, Mr. Griffith and Me By Lillian Gish & Ann Pinchot (Englewood Cliffs, NJ Prentice-Hall, 1969)

D. W. Griffith (1875–1948) was a popular and innovative Hollywood film director who made silent films in the early 20th century. His most famous film was Birth of a Nation, which appeared in 1915 and drew criticism from many African Americans for its depiction of blacks and its advocacy of white supremacy. The NAACP organized protests and boycotts of the film nationwide. In this selection from her autobiography, the actress Lillian Gish describes Griffith’s conception of the film.

One afternoon during the spring of 1914, while we were still working in California, Mr. Griffith took me aside on the set and said in an undertone, “After the others leave tonight, would you please stay.” Later, as some of the company drifted out, I realized that a similar message had been given to a few others. This procedure was typical of Mr. Griffith when he was planning a new film. He observed us with a smile, amused perhaps by our curiosity over the mystery that he had created. I suspected what the meeting was about. A few days before, we had been having lunch at The White Kitchen, and I had noticed that his pockets were crammed with papers and pamphlets. My curiosity was aroused, but it would have been presumptuous of me to ask about them. With Mr. Griffith one did not ask; one only answered. Besides, I had learned that if I waited long enough he would tell me. “I’ve bought a book by Thomas Dixon, called The Clansman. I’m going to use it to tell the truth about the War between the States. It hasn’t been told accurately in history books. Only the winning side in a war ever gets to tell its story.” He paused, watching the cluster of actors: Henry Walthall, Spottiswoode Aiken, Bobby Harron, Mae Marsh, Miriam Cooper, Elmer Clifton, George Siegmann, Walter Long, and me.

“The story concerns two families—the Stonemans from the North and the Camerons from the South.” He added significantly, “I know I can trust you.” He swore us to secrecy, and to us his caution was understandable. Should his competitors learn of his new project, they would have films on the same subject completed before his work was released. He discussed his story plots freely only over lunch or dinner, often testing them out on me because I was close-mouthed and never repeated what anyone told me.…

Mr. Griffith didn’t need the Dixon book. His intention was to tell his version of the War between the States. But he evidently lacked the confidence to start production on a twelve-reel film without an established book as a basis for his story. After the film was completed and he had shown it to the so-called author, Dixon said: “This isn’t my book at all.” But Mr. Griffith was glad to use Dixon’s name on the film as author, for, as he told me, “The public hates you if it thinks you wrote, directed, and produced the entire film yourself. It’s the quickest way to make enemies.” After the first rehearsal, the pace increased. Mr. Griffith worked, as usual, without a script. But this time his pockets bulged with books, maps, and pamphlets, which he read during meals and the rare breaks in his hectic schedule.… At first I didn’t pay much attention to Mr. Griffith’s concept of the film. His claim that history books falsified actual happenings struck me as most peculiar. At that time I was too naïve to think that history books would attempt to falsify anything. I’ve lived long enough now to know that the whole truth is never told in history texts. Only the people who lived through an era, who are the real participants in the drama as it occurs, know the truth. The people of each generation, it seems to me, are the most accurate historians of their time. Soon sets were going up; costumes arrived; and mysterious crates, evidently filled with military equipment, were delivered.…

When the final casting was announced, we learned that Ralph Lewis was to play the Honorable Austin Stoneman, the “uncrowned king of Capitol Hill.” The character of Stoneman, a fiery political fanatic from the North, was patterned after the real-life Thaddeus Stevens, one of the legislators whose harsh policy toward the South wrecked President Lincoln’s postwar plans. Bobby Harron and Elmer Clifton were to play Stoneman’s sons, and I was given the role of his daughter Elsie. Mary Alden was to be Stoneman’s mulatto mistress Lydia Brown, whom Dixon described as “a woman of extraordinary animal beauty and the fiery temper of a leopardess.” George Siegmann was awarded the part of Silas Lynch, who, according to Dixon, was “a Negro of perhaps forty years, a man of charming features.…” Walter Long was to be the renegade Negro Gus, and Elmo Lincoln, a magnificent strong man who would later swing through the trees as Tarzan, played the Negro who attacks Wallace Reid, the stalwart blacksmith. There were practically no Negro actors in California then and, as far as we knew, only a few in the East. Even in minstrel shows, the parts were usually played by whites in blackface. The only scene in which actual Negroes appear in The Birth is the one in which the Stoneman boys, visiting the southern Camerons, are taken out to the plantation to see Negroes working in the cotton fields.

When this scene was filmed in Death Valley, where the Negroes worked, they danced andplayed their banjos for the visiting actors. But one young Negro woman did play in the film—Madame Sul-Te-Wan. (We never did discover the origin of her name.) She was first employed to help us keep our dressing rooms clean at the studio. She was devoted to Mr. Griffith, and he in turn loved her. Later, when Madame was having financial difficulties, he sent her money to help herself and her small sons. She was one of the few friends near him when he died years later in Hollywood.… For President Lincoln, Mr. Griffith chose Joseph Henabery, a tall, thin man who could be made up to resemble Lincoln. The search for an appropriate Mary Todd Lincoln ended when he found a woman with an uncanny similarity to the First Lady working in wardrobe. Raoul Walsh was picked for the role of John Wilkes Booth. Members of Mr. Lincoln’s Cabinet were chosen on the basis of facial resemblance to the historical characters. The other historical characters were recreated by Donald Crisp as General Grant, Howard Gaye as General Lee, and Sam de Grasse as Senator Sumner.…

Although fact and legend were familiar to him, he did meticulous research for The Birth. The first half of The Birth, about the war itself, reflects his own point of view. I know that he also relied greatly on Harper’s Pictorial History of the Civil War, Matthew Brady’s Civil War Photographs: Confederate and Union Veterans— Eyewitnesses on Location; the Nicolay and Hay Abraham Lincoln: A History; and The Soldier in Our Civil War: A Pictorial History of the Conflict 1861–1865. For the second half, about Reconstruction, he consulted Thomas Dixon, and A History of the American People by Woodrow Wilson. President Wilson had taught history before going into politics, and Mr. Griffith had great respect for his erudition. For Klan material, he drew on a book called Ku Klux Klan—Its Origin, Growth and Disbandment by John C. Lester and D.L. Wilson. But he did not use the uniform that is worn by Klan members today. Instead he used the costumes that, according to Thomas Dixon, were worn by the earlier Klans—white and scarlet flowing robes with hood and mask to hide the features of rider and horse. Brady’s photographs were constantly consulted, and Mr. Griffith restaged many moments of history with complete fidelity to them. The photographs were used as guides for such scenes as Lee’s surrender at Appomattox, the signing of the Emancipation Proclamation, and Sherman’s march to the sea. He telegraphed a newspaper in Columbia, South Carolina, for photographs of the interior of the state capital, which held a majority of Negro representatives after the war, and constructed the legislative chamber according to the photographs.

The largest interior was Ford’s Theater, the setting of the assassination scene, which was done in one day on the lot. So great was Mr. Griffith’s obsession with authenticity that he unearthed a copy of Our American Cousin, which had been performed at Ford’s Theater on the night of the assassination, and restaged parts of it. In the actual filming, as Raoul Walsh, gun ready, steals into the Presidential box, the lines being spoken on the replica of the stage are precisely those spoken at the fateful moment on the night of April 14, 1865. This fidelity to facts was an innovation in films. Mr. Griffith knew the terrain of the battle fields, and he hired several Civil War veterans to scout locations similar to the original ones. After exploring the southern California country, they chose what later became the Universal lot for the countryside around Petersburg, Virginia, site of the last prolonged siege and final battle of the war. He had studied maps of the major battles of the Civil War and, with the help of the veterans, laid out the battle fields. Trenches, breastworks, roads, brooks, and buildings were constructed to duplicate those of the actual battle fields. Troop movements were planned with the advice of the veterans and two men from West Point Military Academy. Civil War artillery was obtained from West Point and the Smithsonian Institution, for use when the camera was close. Mr. Griffith also sent to the Smithsonian for historical records and then went over the documents with his advisers. But in the end he came to his own conclusions about historical facts. He would never take the opinion of only one man as final.

Source: From The Movies, Mr. Griffith, and Me by Lillian Gish with Ann Pinchot. Copyright © 1969 by Lillian Gish and Ann Pinchot. Copyright renewed © 1997 by James Frasher and Ann Pinchot. Reprinted by arrangement with James Frasher, Susan Pinchot, and the Barbara Hogenson Agency.

Back to Lillian Gish Home page

Colorful, lively, and moving memoir of a giant of the early screen, actress Lillian Gish. Her story is inseparable with the history of the movies, from the early days, when the pioneers of the industry worked long hours through hardship and cold, public criticism through the horrors of war, and the proverty of the Depression. She knew them all: Mary Pickford, Greta Garbo, Rudolh Valentino, Noel Coward, Erich Von Stroheim, and many more. She talks about the director of many of her films, D.W. Griffith (David Wark Griffith), whose consuming passion creating new ways to tell stories on celluloid. A long-time member of his company, she separates the man from the legend. She exposes the very personal, human side of this early Hollywood legend, warts and all.

True to her own philosophy, Lillian Gish in this book tells the story of her own era and of the personalities who built the movie industry to its present greatness. With candour and wisdom, humour and pathos, Miss Gish relates her own experiences and fascinating memories of the growth and development of motion pictures. This is the story of a great industry, from birth to maturity. It is also the story of the people who struggled, dreamed, and strove unceasingly to make the film industry the giant that it is today.

The subtlety and passionate conviction of her work with Griffith revolutionized the art of screen acting. In 1920, she became one of the first women to direct a feature film, REMODELING HER HUSBAND. Soon after that, she assumed artistic control of the films in which she appeared; her contract with MGM in the late silent era gave her a power few other women have achieved in Hollywood. With such productions as LA BOHÈME, THE SCARLET LETTER and THE WIND, she brought the silent film to the summit of its art.

Peter Warrack: Lillian Gish signing her book, The Movies, Mr. Griffith and Me

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The Movies, Mr. Griffith and Me – Photo Gallery

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The Movies, Mr. Griffith and Me – 1969 The Movies, Mr. Griffith and Me By Lillian Gish & Ann Pinchot (Englewood Cliffs, NJ Prentice-Hall, 1969)

[heliosfinance]

What Being Homeless Taught Me About Money and Happiness

[Got another great guest post for y’all today. This one comes from Lyn Alden, a newer blogger on the scene who puts out some great in-depth financial guides on her site. Today she dives inwards and shares a part of her own journey with us, and what she’s learned about money and happiness throughout it. Hop on over to her site when you’re done and show her some love!]

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When I was a child, I was homeless for several years.

While most kids my age were starting elementary school, my mother and I were living in homeless shelters, cheap motels, and at the worst point, in a car for a while.

We washed ourselves in public restrooms (sometimes we had to sneak in to do it, in the early morning when people weren’t around), and whether we ate enough or not was based on the kindness of strangers.  I jumped around between schools a lot during kindergarten and first grade, and had some multi-month schooling gaps.  A homeless guy taught me how to play chess.

Eventually my luck improved a bit, and I went to live with my elderly father in a trailer park, where I grew up until I left for college at 18.  He didn’t have much money, so I had to rely on $50,000 worth of student loans and part-time work to fund it.

That all sucked, but now at 29 my finances are solid.

My student debts are a thing of the past, I have a large six figure investment portfolio that I continue to pour money into, there’s plenty of cash set aside for liquidity, and I financially support my mother to help her make ends meet.

The combination of a great income from engineering and finance, always maintaining a side hustle, having a minimalist (but admittedly not frugal) lifestyle, and consistently investing, has worked well.

A lot of people don’t like talking about money.  Especially for things that feel awkward to admit, like having been in poverty.  But for me, these experiences were incredibly valuable, and it’s worth sharing what I learned from them.

#1. It’s the uncertainty, not the lack of comforts, that causes suffering

Being homeless sucks, but it’s not necessarily for the reasons we might assume.

In extreme circumstances, like people in cities literally out in the cold streets for prolonged periods, or life in certain developing countries, the lack of comforts really does cause physical suffering.

But most poverty in the developed world causes a different kind of suffering: constant stress and uncertainty.

I mean, many well-off people use their vacations to go camping.  They PAY MONEY to live as though they’re broke for a week, and it’s fun!  And that’s because it’s just a game; we can enjoy the upsides of roughing it out in nature without experiencing any of the uncertainty and difficulties of people who don’t have a choice.

Although it became scary and unhappy at the end when I was living in a car, for most of my time homeless, I was happy.  Kids don’t need much in life to feel joy.

One day, a bunch of us children in a shelter were bored, so we decided to make a circus for our parents.  We did a survey of our available skillsets, got some markers and cardboard and random odds and ends, and put on a show.

Other times, my mother would take me to museums, which are cheap.  She always had me reading, going to the beach, or otherwise doing something of value.

But for her, I’m sure it was a lot less fun.  She had the constant stress of uncertainty, of never feeling in control, and of not knowing where herself and her child were going to live next, or who might give us food.  And trying (and succeeding) at being a good parent even in the worst of circumstances.

People don’t necessarily need to be homeless to have those stresses, either.  A significant percentage of the population is living paycheck to paycheck, not knowing for sure how they will pay their bills next month.

We can apply this concept to our daily life to build serious wealth.  Voluntary simplicity is joy.

Living simply, when it’s a choice, doesn’t have to detract from happiness at all.  Material comforts have relatively little impact on happiness beyond a certain point.  Living in simple conditions, cooking your own food, going to the beach or library or museums or hiking for your pastimes, and saving a ton of money in the process, can be a lot of fun.  And it’s healthy.

Meanwhile, when your simple lifestyle allows you to build up your retirement savings, start an emergency fund, or pay off your debts, you begin to feel free.  When you have enough money stashed away to cover your expenses for a long time, along with diverse income streams, it provides peace of mind.  And considering that money problems are possibly the leading cause of relationship fights, good money habits can make for a more joyful partnership as well.

When I was living with my father, family vacations consisted of him driving me and a friend to a local beach town, where we stayed in a little motel and spent time on the boardwalk.  He would give me a big pile of spare coins that he had saved up for months as my vacation allowance to spend on arcades.

In contrast, I’ve upped the scope of my vacations in more recent years, like spending three weeks in luxury hotels in Hong Kong, enjoying rooftop bars, fancy restaurants, and gorgeous mountain trails the whole time.  But what I learned firsthand, at least for me, was that the fun of a trip is almost 100% based on who you are with, rather than how classy you travel.

Luxuries are just the sprinkles on the sundae.

#2. You need all parts of your financial house in order, not just some

In her youth, my mother earned a high income and had a sports car.  But when things went (really) sour and her income stopped flowing, she had no savings.

My father was the opposite.  He lived in a trailer and never had a high income, but always had a fully stocked emergency fund and his credit score was 848.   No joke, he literally complained to me wondering why they took off those two points.

His only money problem was that he never had a wealth-building mindset.  He paid every single bill on time without fail, and never spent more money than he earned.  He had a pension to rely on for retirement, and always had five figures of cash stashed away so that liquidity was never a problem.  He was generous to me, to neighbors, and to friends.

(And to his girlfriends; he was a bit of a stud in his old age!)

But he never deliberately saved extra money, and never compounded it to make it grow.

In fact, he sold all his stocks in his small 401(k) at the bottom of the market during the 2001/2002 recession, and stayed in cash.  Rather than holding onto his investments, he got turned off by the volatility and went to cash forever, and missed out on the recovery.

To achieve financial freedom, all three components need to be in order:  Income, Saving, and Investing.  Not just one or two.

#1. Income: It’s important to earn enough money to make an impact, however that is defined for you.  Whether through education, entrepreneurship, or side hustles, a bigger stream of income will lead to financial security more quickly.

For example, someone who makes $30,000/year in after-tax income and has $20,000/year in expenses will have $10,000/year to use for paying off debt and saving for retirement.

But if she can earn just $500/month after tax on the side, then although it only increases her income by 20%, it increases her potential savings rate by a full 60%.  That makes a huge difference.

#2. Saving: Whether it’s keeping a budget or something else, find a pattern that fits for you and that keeps your savings going up.

A lot of pro athletes make millions and then go bankrupt five years later.  Johnny Depp made more money than a hundred people do in a lifetime, but spent it all buying things like $5 million cannons.

No amount of income can fix poor spending habits.

#3. Investments: This is where a lot of people go wrong.  They spend decades working and aren’t much richer than the day they started, because they haven’t been investing.  Then they find themselves vulnerable to layoffs and pension cuts.

Investing every month like clockwork, and achieving a good rate of return from a diversified portfolio, will allow you to reach financial freedom early.

One of the best ways to really push yourself to build wealth is to track it.  Most people don’t.

#3. Wealth-building isn’t always a smooth process

I started investing in stocks when I was 16.

Admittedly, I had NO IDEA what I was doing, since to me, a stock was “undervalued” if it dropped a lot in price recently, since it was less valuable than before, and that’s what Warren Buffett said to do, right?  Or something like that.

I didn’t know about price-to-earnings ratios, analyzing the discounted cash flows, or any other way to fundamentally value an investment like people who wear suits do.

But it was a start.

I was tired of being broke, and of always being uncertain about the future or how I would afford things like school.  I saw the two halves of my parents, and wanted to put their strengths together in such a way that I wouldn’t have the same struggles they did.

So, I read every book I could find on investing. I got excited about spreadsheets, and turned on by compound returns.  Warren Buffett (and Batman, let’s be real) was my hero.

When I was in college, I had it all figured out.  I knew what the typical starting salary for an engineer was, could figure out all the basic expenses of life and how to keep them small, and calculated that if I put $2,000 in inflation-adjusted dollars away per month, and achieve a 7% average return on my investments, my money would grow like this over my career:

But in my mid-twenties, my father passed away.

I encountered health problems of my own as well, which lasted for a few years and resulted in big medical bills that weren’t fully covered by insurance, which wasted many thousands of dollars while I was trying to work and save.  And my mother started needing financial support.

I hadn’t accounted for all that in my projections…

So, I started to go off track, and had a couple years where my wealth didn’t grow at all, and even went down one year.  My income was stagnant due to my lack of time and focus, and my expenses grew.

I eventually got it back on track, and started pushing my income up and expenses back down.

What I learned here was that we can’t compare ourselves to others.  I saw examples of people hitting a million dollars by age 30, or people whose net worth seemed to only go ever upward, and I thought, “what the hell!”

But everyone encounters different curveballs in life, and the worst thing you can do is let a temporary setback drive you permanently off course.

#4. Experiencing both the good and the bad in life is valuable

Most of us go through life fearing certain things, and financial topics are near the top of the list.

We worry that we’ll lose our jobs, we worry about debt or retirement, we worry about recessions, and many of us imagine the worst – what if we’re out on the street?  What if we’re homeless?

In ancient Greece and Rome, Stoics used to practice voluntary discomfort as a form of self-improvement.  They would identify things that they feared, and deliberately go out and experience them.  At that point they could say, “is this what I feared?”

Being homeless in my youth let me experience at least some small part of the rougher side of the spectrum.  All these years later, it still helps put things into perspective when I encounter day-to-day problems.

If not for that experience, I don’t think I’d be as committed to wealth-building and financial freedom as I am today.  But rather than stop there, I made a habit of practicing voluntary discomfort from time to time:

MMA Fighting — I spent 12 years doing mixed martial arts, especially during my teenage years.

I’ve been held down and punched repeatedly by a man twice my weight, on more than one occasion.  My left knee was broken in a sparring match and still makes some interesting sounds to this day.  I fractured my right thumb when I hit guy in the ribs with a hook punch and accidentally clipped his blocking elbow during my swing.  I’ve been choked to submission and slammed to the floor more times than I can count.  A professional fighter 15 pounds heavier and 15 years older than me beat me at a tournament so badly once that I cried a little.

To this day, it all makes a lot of things in life seem less scary.

Fasting — I used to think that if you don’t eat, you just keep getting hungrier and hungrier, which frightened me.  So, I decided to try a 3-day fast, with just water.

As it turns out, once you cross a certain point of not eating, the body starts to tap into its own body fat for fuel more readily.   If you go long enough, your brain starts running on ketones instead of glucose, which is known to suppress hunger in many people, and give you a sense of alertness.  Many people fast during religious or spiritual experiences, partially because it creates a sense of mental clarity and even mild euphoria.  I was less hungry on day 3 than I was on the first day, and I still occasionally do 1-day fasts.  (Disclaimer: Maybe check with your doctor first before trying any weird eating habits, especially if you’re on meds.)

That experience ended up coming in handy, because a few months later, my town was struck by a thunderstorm deadly enough to have a Wikipedia page about it.  I was about to go grocery shopping that morning, so literally the only food I had in my apartment when the storm hit was a single chocolate bar.

Power was out for miles, stores were closed or emptied out, and more fallen trees than I had ever seen in my life were blocking roads.  Three people were dead not too far away, and the county was declared a federal disaster area.  But because I had already experienced what fasting really felt like, I didn’t feel much to worry about, and just thought calmly about how I should best approach this and get supplies from somewhere, eventually.

It would have been a lot more stressful had I not already experienced what not eating is like.

Lack of Control — I’m an orderly person that likes to plan everything in advance and have multiple backup plans.  The idea of not being in control is unappealing.

So, I once flew to Argentina without telling a single person where I was going, and rented an apartment in a middle class non-touristy neighborhood of Buenos Aires for three weeks. I don’t speak a word of Spanish, and English isn’t very common there.

The whole trip consisted of me trying to navigate around the city to see things, with everything being 10x harder than usual because I didn’t know what I was doing and couldn’t speak very well.  But it was memorable, and reminds me how easy life is with a car, and where I can speak to people and read signs.

Final Words

There’s a Chinese proverb that goes, “wealth never survives three generations”.

From what Money Magazine has reported, it’s true.  A full 70% of wealthy families lose their wealth by the second generation, and 90% lose it by the third generation.

That’s an astounding statistic if you think about it.  Not only do most of them not continue to build wealth from their starting point; they actually lose what they already have.

Partly that’s because, according to the same article, 2/3rds of people don’t disclose almost anything about their wealth to their children.  As the next generation grows up, they often don’t have any of the money habits or hard work ethic of their parents that originally built the wealth from the ground up.

Naturally, parents want to give their children a better life than they had.  But often in doing so, the next generation becomes soft and pampered, unable to appreciate their money that they didn’t have to earn themselves, and never developing the skills to maintain and build what they have.

So, if you don’t have a lot of money and didn’t come from a well-off background, then take heart!

Although you may be disadvantaged in some ways, in other ways you have an advantage, because you’re hungry for more, and you have to create what you want from scratch.  Not a lot of people set out on a wealth-building lifestyle, but once you get on that train, you’ve got all the money habits in place that should keep you going up.

And if you did come from money, and don’t want to fall prey to the statistics, then try to continually rekindle that sense of energy and passion and vulnerability so that you can maintain all the advantages of having money without having the downsides of complacency.  Practicing voluntary discomfort is useful in that sense.

Either way, it’s important to push yourself, to stay fresh by experiencing multiple sides of the world, and to put yourself in new and uncomfortable situations to learn and grow from them.

But live below your means and save and invest like hell, so that as much of the discomfort as possible that you experience in life is by choice.

****** Lyn blogs over at LynAlden.com, and holds a bachelor’s in electronics engineering and a master’s in engineering management with a focus on engineering economics. Much of her work involves budget planning, technical procurement, and project management. On the side she does website development and freelance writing, and creates in-depth guides on financial topics.

What Being Homeless Taught Me About Money and Happiness published first on http://ift.tt/2ljLF4B

[bookwyrminspiration]

Alden’s character was like mainly a plot device I think. Which is the main reason he does so much questionable shit in the books lol.

Yeah, exactly!! Alden's purpose in the story was to find Sophie and to introduce her to the new world and what it was supposed to be like. He was an almost perfect example, the top of the top, able to show her the wonders of the Lost Cities and tell her about how different things are, how much nicer.

At the same time, he serves as an example of how everything he says isn't true because the top of the top is looking into illegal things, things that shouldn't exist in their world, etc.

(I'll put the rest under a cut to save space!)

Alden's not sending Fitz into the Forbidden Cities because he doesn't care about him, Fitz went to the Forbidden Cities because Shannon needed someone close to Sophie's age for her to latch on to and be guided by, and Fitz needed a reason to be there--boom, his dad was looking into it and involved him!! Alden's existence moves the plot forward and allows everything to actually take place.

Shannon needed Alden to exist so Fitz could find Sophie, so then the next question is why does Alden need/want to find Sophie? What's his stake in all of this? From there we get backstory about Prentice and the memory break, which further contributes to Sophie's story outside of Alden's existence.

He's also a great resource for her in the first few books while she's establishing herself in the world and figuring out her place. She goes to him with questions and concerns, and through that we learn about how things work (or how they don't). He gives her advice, serves as a father figure, looks into things for her, etc. He's her anchor for the beginning before she finds strength from other sources, and then he's mostly exhausted his purpose. I mean we really haven't seen him in a while. Yes, there's the whole situation with meddling in the love triangle I'll get to later, but aside from that? He's very much a background character now. He brought Sophie to the Lost Cities and introduced her to the world, and then his mind broke prompting Sophie to look into her power and into her past, and once she had those leads and solid footing she didn't need him anymore.

And because it's talked about so much I'm giving the advice to Keefe to leave Sophie alone it's own section. I think that it was entirely for drama. The love triangle has obsessed readers for so long and is one of the driving points of the series, especially for young sokeefe shippers. Creating a situation where sokeefe is being actively discouraged by the characters in the story and the "rival" ship is being encouraged gets a reaction, and it creates drama. So out of the people who could do that, Alden was the best option. Grady would discourage Keefe from getting with Sophie flat out, no sophitz mention, and Keefe doesn't have a history with him that can be employed. Sandor would discourage all people from dating Sophie, and Keefe has a history of joking around with Sandor and laughing off his threats, so it wouldn't land. Alden has a history of being like a father figure to Keefe, of caring about both Keefe and Fitz, and doesn't object to Sophie dating. He happened to be the best person to create the drama, but I think that's all it was. It was drama. It's not going to change the course of the ships in the story, just temporarily create a conflict to be dealt with that will have invested readers in agony and emotionally distraught.

There's nothing wrong with having characters that exist to make other things happen in the story, it instead creates this kind of situation looking at these characters where you have to evaluate whether the reason for this characters actions are because the author needed it to happen or because the character needed it to happen. And from there decide if you're going to base your understanding of this character off a need that wasn't their own or if it's something you can separate from them. Sometimes authors are pulled along by the characters, and something the characters are pulled along by the author. In Alden's case, he was useful for Shannon and while a lot of the things he did were questionable, I don't associate that as a desire of his but instead as a desire that was funneled through him, if that makes sense.

Alden makes things happen! He served a purpose and now he's done, but because of the importance he had in the beginning he does still exist in the story and pop up from time to time, just not nearly as often. Alden character vs Shannon's desire is so interesting to me so thank you for bringing it up!!

[fesahaawit]

What Being Homeless Taught Me About Money and Happiness

[Got another great guest post for y’all today. This one comes from Lyn Alden, a newer blogger on the scene who puts out some great in-depth financial guides on her site. Today she dives inwards and shares a part of her own journey with us, and what she’s learned about money and happiness throughout it. Hop on over to her site when you’re done and show her some love!]

********

When I was a child, I was homeless for several years.

While most kids my age were starting elementary school, my mother and I were living in homeless shelters, cheap motels, and at the worst point, in a car for a while.

We washed ourselves in public restrooms (sometimes we had to sneak in to do it, in the early morning when people weren’t around), and whether we ate enough or not was based on the kindness of strangers.  I jumped around between schools a lot during kindergarten and first grade, and had some multi-month schooling gaps.  A homeless guy taught me how to play chess.

Eventually my luck improved a bit, and I went to live with my elderly father in a trailer park, where I grew up until I left for college at 18.  He didn’t have much money, so I had to rely on $50,000 worth of student loans and part-time work to fund it.

That all sucked, but now at 29 my finances are solid.

My student debts are a thing of the past, I have a large six figure investment portfolio that I continue to pour money into, there’s plenty of cash set aside for liquidity, and I financially support my mother to help her make ends meet.

The combination of a great income from engineering and finance, always maintaining a side hustle, having a minimalist (but admittedly not frugal) lifestyle, and consistently investing, has worked well.

A lot of people don’t like talking about money.  Especially for things that feel awkward to admit, like having been in poverty.  But for me, these experiences were incredibly valuable, and it’s worth sharing what I learned from them.

#1. It’s the uncertainty, not the lack of comforts, that causes suffering

Being homeless sucks, but it’s not necessarily for the reasons we might assume.

In extreme circumstances, like people in cities literally out in the cold streets for prolonged periods, or life in certain developing countries, the lack of comforts really does cause physical suffering.

But most poverty in the developed world causes a different kind of suffering: constant stress and uncertainty.

I mean, many well-off people use their vacations to go camping.  They PAY MONEY to live as though they’re broke for a week, and it’s fun!  And that’s because it’s just a game; we can enjoy the upsides of roughing it out in nature without experiencing any of the uncertainty and difficulties of people who don’t have a choice.

Although it became scary and unhappy at the end when I was living in a car, for most of my time homeless, I was happy.  Kids don’t need much in life to feel joy.

One day, a bunch of us children in a shelter were bored, so we decided to make a circus for our parents.  We did a survey of our available skillsets, got some markers and cardboard and random odds and ends, and put on a show.

Other times, my mother would take me to museums, which are cheap.  She always had me reading, going to the beach, or otherwise doing something of value.

But for her, I’m sure it was a lot less fun.  She had the constant stress of uncertainty, of never feeling in control, and of not knowing where herself and her child were going to live next, or who might give us food.  And trying (and succeeding) at being a good parent even in the worst of circumstances.

People don’t necessarily need to be homeless to have those stresses, either.  A significant percentage of the population is living paycheck to paycheck, not knowing for sure how they will pay their bills next month.

We can apply this concept to our daily life to build serious wealth.  Voluntary simplicity is joy.

Living simply, when it’s a choice, doesn’t have to detract from happiness at all.  Material comforts have relatively little impact on happiness beyond a certain point.  Living in simple conditions, cooking your own food, going to the beach or library or museums or hiking for your pastimes, and saving a ton of money in the process, can be a lot of fun.  And it’s healthy.

Meanwhile, when your simple lifestyle allows you to build up your retirement savings, start an emergency fund, or pay off your debts, you begin to feel free.  When you have enough money stashed away to cover your expenses for a long time, along with diverse income streams, it provides peace of mind.  And considering that money problems are possibly the leading cause of relationship fights, good money habits can make for a more joyful partnership as well.

When I was living with my father, family vacations consisted of him driving me and a friend to a local beach town, where we stayed in a little motel and spent time on the boardwalk.  He would give me a big pile of spare coins that he had saved up for months as my vacation allowance to spend on arcades.

In contrast, I’ve upped the scope of my vacations in more recent years, like spending three weeks in luxury hotels in Hong Kong, enjoying rooftop bars, fancy restaurants, and gorgeous mountain trails the whole time.  But what I learned firsthand, at least for me, was that the fun of a trip is almost 100% based on who you are with, rather than how classy you travel.

Luxuries are just the sprinkles on the sundae.

#2. You need all parts of your financial house in order, not just some

In her youth, my mother earned a high income and had a sports car.  But when things went (really) sour and her income stopped flowing, she had no savings.

My father was the opposite.  He lived in a trailer and never had a high income, but always had a fully stocked emergency fund and his credit score was 848.   No joke, he literally complained to me wondering why they took off those two points.

His only money problem was that he never had a wealth-building mindset.  He paid every single bill on time without fail, and never spent more money than he earned.  He had a pension to rely on for retirement, and always had five figures of cash stashed away so that liquidity was never a problem.  He was generous to me, to neighbors, and to friends.

(And to his girlfriends; he was a bit of a stud in his old age!)

But he never deliberately saved extra money, and never compounded it to make it grow.

In fact, he sold all his stocks in his small 401(k) at the bottom of the market during the 2001/2002 recession, and stayed in cash.  Rather than holding onto his investments, he got turned off by the volatility and went to cash forever, and missed out on the recovery.

To achieve financial freedom, all three components need to be in order:  Income, Saving, and Investing.  Not just one or two.

#1. Income: It’s important to earn enough money to make an impact, however that is defined for you.  Whether through education, entrepreneurship, or side hustles, a bigger stream of income will lead to financial security more quickly.

For example, someone who makes $30,000/year in after-tax income and has $20,000/year in expenses will have $10,000/year to use for paying off debt and saving for retirement.

But if she can earn just $500/month after tax on the side, then although it only increases her income by 20%, it increases her potential savings rate by a full 60%.  That makes a huge difference.

#2. Saving: Whether it’s keeping a budget or something else, find a pattern that fits for you and that keeps your savings going up.

A lot of pro athletes make millions and then go bankrupt five years later.  Johnny Depp made more money than a hundred people do in a lifetime, but spent it all buying things like $5 million cannons.

No amount of income can fix poor spending habits.

#3. Investments: This is where a lot of people go wrong.  They spend decades working and aren’t much richer than the day they started, because they haven’t been investing.  Then they find themselves vulnerable to layoffs and pension cuts.

Investing every month like clockwork, and achieving a good rate of return from a diversified portfolio, will allow you to reach financial freedom early.

One of the best ways to really push yourself to build wealth is to track it.  Most people don’t.

#3. Wealth-building isn’t always a smooth process

I started investing in stocks when I was 16.

Admittedly, I had NO IDEA what I was doing, since to me, a stock was “undervalued” if it dropped a lot in price recently, since it was less valuable than before, and that’s what Warren Buffett said to do, right?  Or something like that.

I didn’t know about price-to-earnings ratios, analyzing the discounted cash flows, or any other way to fundamentally value an investment like people who wear suits do.

But it was a start.

I was tired of being broke, and of always being uncertain about the future or how I would afford things like school.  I saw the two halves of my parents, and wanted to put their strengths together in such a way that I wouldn’t have the same struggles they did.

So, I read every book I could find on investing. I got excited about spreadsheets, and turned on by compound returns.  Warren Buffett (and Batman, let’s be real) was my hero.

When I was in college, I had it all figured out.  I knew what the typical starting salary for an engineer was, could figure out all the basic expenses of life and how to keep them small, and calculated that if I put $2,000 in inflation-adjusted dollars away per month, and achieve a 7% average return on my investments, my money would grow like this over my career:

But in my mid-twenties, my father passed away.

I encountered health problems of my own as well, which lasted for a few years and resulted in big medical bills that weren’t fully covered by insurance, which wasted many thousands of dollars while I was trying to work and save.  And my mother started needing financial support.

I hadn’t accounted for all that in my projections…

So, I started to go off track, and had a couple years where my wealth didn’t grow at all, and even went down one year.  My income was stagnant due to my lack of time and focus, and my expenses grew.

I eventually got it back on track, and started pushing my income up and expenses back down.

What I learned here was that we can’t compare ourselves to others.  I saw examples of people hitting a million dollars by age 30, or people whose net worth seemed to only go ever upward, and I thought, “what the hell!”

But everyone encounters different curveballs in life, and the worst thing you can do is let a temporary setback drive you permanently off course.

#4. Experiencing both the good and the bad in life is valuable

Most of us go through life fearing certain things, and financial topics are near the top of the list.

We worry that we’ll lose our jobs, we worry about debt or retirement, we worry about recessions, and many of us imagine the worst – what if we’re out on the street?  What if we’re homeless?

In ancient Greece and Rome, Stoics used to practice voluntary discomfort as a form of self-improvement.  They would identify things that they feared, and deliberately go out and experience them.  At that point they could say, “is this what I feared?”

Being homeless in my youth let me experience at least some small part of the rougher side of the spectrum.  All these years later, it still helps put things into perspective when I encounter day-to-day problems.

If not for that experience, I don’t think I’d be as committed to wealth-building and financial freedom as I am today.  But rather than stop there, I made a habit of practicing voluntary discomfort from time to time:

MMA Fighting — I spent 12 years doing mixed martial arts, especially during my teenage years.

I’ve been held down and punched repeatedly by a man twice my weight, on more than one occasion.  My left knee was broken in a sparring match and still makes some interesting sounds to this day.  I fractured my right thumb when I hit guy in the ribs with a hook punch and accidentally clipped his blocking elbow during my swing.  I’ve been choked to submission and slammed to the floor more times than I can count.  A professional fighter 15 pounds heavier and 15 years older than me beat me at a tournament so badly once that I cried a little.

To this day, it all makes a lot of things in life seem less scary.

Fasting — I used to think that if you don’t eat, you just keep getting hungrier and hungrier, which frightened me.  So, I decided to try a 3-day fast, with just water.

As it turns out, once you cross a certain point of not eating, the body starts to tap into its own body fat for fuel more readily.   If you go long enough, your brain starts running on ketones instead of glucose, which is known to suppress hunger in many people, and give you a sense of alertness.  Many people fast during religious or spiritual experiences, partially because it creates a sense of mental clarity and even mild euphoria.  I was less hungry on day 3 than I was on the first day, and I still occasionally do 1-day fasts.  (Disclaimer: Maybe check with your doctor first before trying any weird eating habits, especially if you’re on meds.)

That experience ended up coming in handy, because a few months later, my town was struck by a thunderstorm deadly enough to have a Wikipedia page about it.  I was about to go grocery shopping that morning, so literally the only food I had in my apartment when the storm hit was a single chocolate bar.

Power was out for miles, stores were closed or emptied out, and more fallen trees than I had ever seen in my life were blocking roads.  Three people were dead not too far away, and the county was declared a federal disaster area.  But because I had already experienced what fasting really felt like, I didn’t feel much to worry about, and just thought calmly about how I should best approach this and get supplies from somewhere, eventually.

It would have been a lot more stressful had I not already experienced what not eating is like.

Lack of Control — I’m an orderly person that likes to plan everything in advance and have multiple backup plans.  The idea of not being in control is unappealing.

So, I once flew to Argentina without telling a single person where I was going, and rented an apartment in a middle class non-touristy neighborhood of Buenos Aires for three weeks. I don’t speak a word of Spanish, and English isn’t very common there.

The whole trip consisted of me trying to navigate around the city to see things, with everything being 10x harder than usual because I didn’t know what I was doing and couldn’t speak very well.  But it was memorable, and reminds me how easy life is with a car, and where I can speak to people and read signs.

Final Words

There’s a Chinese proverb that goes, “wealth never survives three generations”.

From what Money Magazine has reported, it’s true.  A full 70% of wealthy families lose their wealth by the second generation, and 90% lose it by the third generation.

That’s an astounding statistic if you think about it.  Not only do most of them not continue to build wealth from their starting point; they actually lose what they already have.

Partly that’s because, according to the same article, 2/3rds of people don’t disclose almost anything about their wealth to their children.  As the next generation grows up, they often don’t have any of the money habits or hard work ethic of their parents that originally built the wealth from the ground up.

Naturally, parents want to give their children a better life than they had.  But often in doing so, the next generation becomes soft and pampered, unable to appreciate their money that they didn’t have to earn themselves, and never developing the skills to maintain and build what they have.

So, if you don’t have a lot of money and didn’t come from a well-off background, then take heart!

Although you may be disadvantaged in some ways, in other ways you have an advantage, because you’re hungry for more, and you have to create what you want from scratch.  Not a lot of people set out on a wealth-building lifestyle, but once you get on that train, you’ve got all the money habits in place that should keep you going up.

And if you did come from money, and don’t want to fall prey to the statistics, then try to continually rekindle that sense of energy and passion and vulnerability so that you can maintain all the advantages of having money without having the downsides of complacency.  Practicing voluntary discomfort is useful in that sense.

Either way, it’s important to push yourself, to stay fresh by experiencing multiple sides of the world, and to put yourself in new and uncomfortable situations to learn and grow from them.

But live below your means and save and invest like hell, so that as much of the discomfort as possible that you experience in life is by choice.

****** Lyn blogs over at LynAlden.com, and holds a bachelor’s in electronics engineering and a master’s in engineering management with a focus on engineering economics. Much of her work involves budget planning, technical procurement, and project management. On the side she does website development and freelance writing, and creates in-depth guides on financial topics.

What Being Homeless Taught Me About Money and Happiness posted first on http://ift.tt/2lnwIdQ

[timowp17]

WELCOME to the first work and school day of 2017 and for President Rodrigo Duterte, it’s his first full calendar year in office.

Time is not just simply marking the ending and the beginning but also the continuity. We closed the book of 2016 and we just opened and wrote the first two pages of the New Year as we wrote our constantly-improving strokes in the critical (post-truth) era.

General happenings in January by recurrence

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Every year, we are looking on the first month of the year towards the festivities and traditions:

Traslacion on the Feast of Black Nazrene every 9th in Manila

Sinulog on the 15th in Cebu,

The President’s Vin D’Honneur or a simple Toast for the New Year, somewhere whether in Malacanang or in Panacanang in Davao, and

for this year, the Lunar New Year (the Year of the Fire Rooster) will fall on the 28th

Once in every four years, we, as globally concerned citizens, will witness history from across the Pacific as Donald J. Trump will be sworn in as the 45th President of the United States in Washington, D.C. on the 20th.

Once in a generation, we will once again host a prestigious pageant on the 30th with the 65th Miss Universe — which we will discuss it in a sneak.

The network outlook

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Last month, the Big 3 and CNN Philippines held their respective trade launches — intentionally to woo advertisers — to promote their shows expected to be aired throughout the year.

Their offering for this New Year will still be myopic with teleseryes on weekdays. Keep in mind that not all of the shows enlisted will be materialized throughout the 12-month period.

Specifically, two articles from PEP found out why some local shows — whether original yet in repetitive tried-and-tested model or a remade from a K-Drama they air — are shelved, even from the pre-production stage. Four common reasons why they don’t promise as they market include:

Extension of popular shows (e.g. FPJ’s Ang Probinsyano),

Concentration on bankable love teams (for the young) and on workable tandems (for the mid-age),

Slated stars reject their roles due to better opportunities or their inherent limits, and

Giving too much commitment and concentration for other genres, especially sports.

Inasmuch as teleseryes are detestable in the eyes and taste of millennials, neither ABS nor GMA will even budge to reduce their airing from every weekday to twice a week and go back to their diverse programming grid like in the ’90s.

But let’s see what’s in store for ’17 for each group?

The Big 3

ABS-CBN will have no worries with being an absolute advantage of everything — despite their questionable business ethics and breaking their guiding principles based on their slogan for profiteering — but what fears them will be their writing on the wall, i.e. their franchise expiration in 2020. Focusing on this year, their flagship newscast, TV Patrol, will turn 30. In their entertainment side, PBB Lucky 7 will wrap up with the Big Night this month and Ogie Alcasid, the new Kapamilya, will be one of the judges for Your Face Sounds Familiar — both the first Kids edition (confirmed) and the third regular edition.

After the smashing success of the Encantadia requel, GMA’s reviving their greatest fantaserye in early 2000s, Mulawin. Aside from the speculated revival, three teleseryes are now officialy announced:

After the long wait, Alden Richards and Maine Mendoza (AlDub) will finally take the lead on their first primetime project with Destined To Be Yours.

Barbie Forteza will not meet just one leading lad but four — PBB alumnus Ivan Dorschner, Jak Roberto, Ken Chan & newcomer Addy Raj — for Meant to Be. (premiering this Monday)

Finally, the localized remake of Koreanovela My Love from the Star will still apply the “old guns first” policy with Jennylyn Mercado but the leading man will be his first time as a thespian, Filipino-Spanish model Gil Cuerva.

In the corporate aspect, Atty. Felipe Gozon and associates are open to sell their controlling shares this year. The question is: When will these myopic and arrogant honchos ever materialize?

TV5 will see both the fresh and the revival but critics are bothered with the materiality, due to new management yet held and influenced by the same magnate, and thus, they’re given the benefit of the doubt. On the fresh side — though they no longer produce their own entertainment program — they announced two locally produced programs: the new Philippines Next Top Model and Brillante Mendoza Presents. On the other hand, they announce the revival of AniMEGA after the full year hiatus. So far, their titles in the roster include:

KanColle: Kantai Collection

Uta no Prince-Sama Maji Love 2000%

Knights of Sidonia

Myriad Colors Phantom World, and

Attack on Titan Junior High

New US shows — to be dubbed in Filipino — include Quantico and Supergirl. In their movie library, they’ll include animated flicks from Dreamworks.

However, as a warning, TV5 might go back to its usual ways and might be too helpless if they’re giving in too many to sports like their master, MVP. So far, they’re the official broadcaster for this year’s SEA Games in Malaysia. If the warning’s right, Chot Reyes’ resolution to increase revenue and to diversify the programming grid on the network will be a daunting task.

Aside from TV, Radyo5 management’s getting their head replaced;  According to Ben Tulfo, The Philippine Star president and CEO Miguel Belmonte will succeed Gladys Lana-Lucas. The wishlist for the new chief’s obvious: Give a better news coverage on the breaking issues the day.

Minor players

If there are major players, we should also not forget the minor ones.

CNN Philippines proved in 2016 to be an improvement; it will be proven once again in 2017. Some programs announced on their trade launch include:

The Insider (weekly political program) with Gilbert Remulla,

Trippies, hosted by columnist and book author Jessica Zafra and filmmaker Pepe Diokno,

Harvest (food program) featuring international chef and restaurateur Margarita Forés,

My Philippines (a half-hour local travel program), and

an untitled daily entertainment program and a business newscast.

A mini-documentary by American sports journalist Rafe Bartholomew will be dedicated about the fascination of basketball with Hoop Nation.

PTV will be People’s Broadcasting Corporation (PBC) very soon but in the meantime, their big event they’ll look forward is the ASEAN Golden Jubilee and what more to commemorate it is the hosting of the ASEAN Summit — held twice a year — and a separate East Asia Summit (EAS). However, Duterte’s own RTVM show, Mula sa Masa, Para sa Masa, has yet to be materialized.

As of press time, after 10-11 years, PTV Sports dissolved their stand-alone program following the changes in leadership of the said government media.

IBC 13 — the VHF network that’s still lying under the rock — is awaiting so long who will be the lucky bidder. Last week, Chavit Singson joined the bidding game with Ramon Ang and Eric Canoy. If they haven’t been privatized or no bid was legally qualified, PCO Sec. Martin Andanar and his team will use this channel for dedicated to Muslims and Lumads as promised by his boss in the first State of the Nation Address. However, the Turf believed that the pledged Muslim/Lumad channel should be a digital sub-channel to PTV — as we are about to enter the digital TV age — and give the old frequency to new players.

Euphoria post-revelry

Now that we set the outlook on the VHF, it’s time to delve in what we’re euphoric about even the New Year revelry just ended.

After 22 editions, Miss Universe is coming back to the Philippines. Initially exclusive for Solar Entertainment (specifically ETC) on January 30 in the early morning, it will be a partnership with the Big 3 since the Pacquiao-Mayweather fight. This will be the second edition that goes off the recently concluding calendar year (first being held 2015 for 2014); thus, the press should use the ordinal form instead of the year — in this case, this will be the 65th Miss Universe.

Regardless of who the successor will be, we will witness the final walk of Pia Wurtzbach to wrap up her tenure in her native country, symbolizing the peaceful transfer of the crown. The Turf will delve more in deep detail on its special edition a few days before coronation night (day).

Final thing

One final thing before the last statement, for DBS 35: Well, their regular test broadcasts in 2016 they received were worsening time after time but the question remains: WHEN WILL THEY EVER FORMALLY RELAUNCH? They say, it’s this month but the Turf remains skeptical: “Do you think it’s just too late to launch or will they break their promises like a usual politician?”

What comes in this 2017 is what our strokes direct us as we contact them in the mysterious blank pages.

Like Timow’s Turf on Facebook.

Photo credits:

Black Nazarene: International Business Times

Sinulog: Philippine Star

Archbishop Pinto & President Duterte: Veritas 846

Donald Trump: Washington Star News

Lunar New Year in Binondo: GMA Network

65th Miss Universe entrants: Starmometer

Ogie Alcasid: Philippine Music Registry

Jennylyn Mercado & Gil Cuerva: Manila Bulletin

Brillante Mendoza: Rappler

Jessica Zafra: Philippine Daily Inquirer

Timow’s Turf Opening Salvo & Outlook for 2017 WELCOME to the first work and school day of 2017 and for President Rodrigo Duterte, it’s his first full calendar year in office.

[heliosfinance]

What Being Homeless Taught Me About Money and Happiness

[Got another great guest post for y’all today. This one comes from Lyn Alden, a newer blogger on the scene who puts out some great in-depth financial guides on her site. Today she dives inwards and shares a part of her own journey with us, and what she’s learned about money and happiness throughout it. Hop on over to her site when you’re done and show her some love!]

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When I was a child, I was homeless for several years.

While most kids my age were starting elementary school, my mother and I were living in homeless shelters, cheap motels, and at the worst point, in a car for a while.

We washed ourselves in public restrooms (sometimes we had to sneak in to do it, in the early morning when people weren’t around), and whether we ate enough or not was based on the kindness of strangers.  I jumped around between schools a lot during kindergarten and first grade, and had some multi-month schooling gaps.  A homeless guy taught me how to play chess.

Eventually my luck improved a bit, and I went to live with my elderly father in a trailer park, where I grew up until I left for college at 18.  He didn’t have much money, so I had to rely on $50,000 worth of student loans and part-time work to fund it.

That all sucked, but now at 29 my finances are solid.

My student debts are a thing of the past, I have a large six figure investment portfolio that I continue to pour money into, there’s plenty of cash set aside for liquidity, and I financially support my mother to help her make ends meet.

The combination of a great income from engineering and finance, always maintaining a side hustle, having a minimalist (but admittedly not frugal) lifestyle, and consistently investing, has worked well.

A lot of people don’t like talking about money.  Especially for things that feel awkward to admit, like having been in poverty.  But for me, these experiences were incredibly valuable, and it’s worth sharing what I learned from them.

#1. It’s the uncertainty, not the lack of comforts, that causes suffering

Being homeless sucks, but it’s not necessarily for the reasons we might assume.

In extreme circumstances, like people in cities literally out in the cold streets for prolonged periods, or life in certain developing countries, the lack of comforts really does cause physical suffering.

But most poverty in the developed world causes a different kind of suffering: constant stress and uncertainty.

I mean, many well-off people use their vacations to go camping.  They PAY MONEY to live as though they’re broke for a week, and it’s fun!  And that’s because it’s just a game; we can enjoy the upsides of roughing it out in nature without experiencing any of the uncertainty and difficulties of people who don’t have a choice.

Although it became scary and unhappy at the end when I was living in a car, for most of my time homeless, I was happy.  Kids don’t need much in life to feel joy.

One day, a bunch of us children in a shelter were bored, so we decided to make a circus for our parents.  We did a survey of our available skillsets, got some markers and cardboard and random odds and ends, and put on a show.

Other times, my mother would take me to museums, which are cheap.  She always had me reading, going to the beach, or otherwise doing something of value.

But for her, I’m sure it was a lot less fun.  She had the constant stress of uncertainty, of never feeling in control, and of not knowing where herself and her child were going to live next, or who might give us food.  And trying (and succeeding) at being a good parent even in the worst of circumstances.

People don’t necessarily need to be homeless to have those stresses, either.  A significant percentage of the population is living paycheck to paycheck, not knowing for sure how they will pay their bills next month.

We can apply this concept to our daily life to build serious wealth.  Voluntary simplicity is joy.

Living simply, when it’s a choice, doesn’t have to detract from happiness at all.  Material comforts have relatively little impact on happiness beyond a certain point.  Living in simple conditions, cooking your own food, going to the beach or library or museums or hiking for your pastimes, and saving a ton of money in the process, can be a lot of fun.  And it’s healthy.

Meanwhile, when your simple lifestyle allows you to build up your retirement savings, start an emergency fund, or pay off your debts, you begin to feel free.  When you have enough money stashed away to cover your expenses for a long time, along with diverse income streams, it provides peace of mind.  And considering that money problems are possibly the leading cause of relationship fights, good money habits can make for a more joyful partnership as well.

When I was living with my father, family vacations consisted of him driving me and a friend to a local beach town, where we stayed in a little motel and spent time on the boardwalk.  He would give me a big pile of spare coins that he had saved up for months as my vacation allowance to spend on arcades.

In contrast, I’ve upped the scope of my vacations in more recent years, like spending three weeks in luxury hotels in Hong Kong, enjoying rooftop bars, fancy restaurants, and gorgeous mountain trails the whole time.  But what I learned firsthand, at least for me, was that the fun of a trip is almost 100% based on who you are with, rather than how classy you travel.

Luxuries are just the sprinkles on the sundae.

#2. You need all parts of your financial house in order, not just some

In her youth, my mother earned a high income and had a sports car.  But when things went (really) sour and her income stopped flowing, she had no savings.

My father was the opposite.  He lived in a trailer and never had a high income, but always had a fully stocked emergency fund and his credit score was 848.   No joke, he literally complained to me wondering why they took off those two points.

His only money problem was that he never had a wealth-building mindset.  He paid every single bill on time without fail, and never spent more money than he earned.  He had a pension to rely on for retirement, and always had five figures of cash stashed away so that liquidity was never a problem.  He was generous to me, to neighbors, and to friends.

(And to his girlfriends; he was a bit of a stud in his old age!)

But he never deliberately saved extra money, and never compounded it to make it grow.

In fact, he sold all his stocks in his small 401(k) at the bottom of the market during the 2001/2002 recession, and stayed in cash.  Rather than holding onto his investments, he got turned off by the volatility and went to cash forever, and missed out on the recovery.

To achieve financial freedom, all three components need to be in order:  Income, Saving, and Investing.  Not just one or two.

#1. Income: It’s important to earn enough money to make an impact, however that is defined for you.  Whether through education, entrepreneurship, or side hustles, a bigger stream of income will lead to financial security more quickly.

For example, someone who makes $30,000/year in after-tax income and has $20,000/year in expenses will have $10,000/year to use for paying off debt and saving for retirement.

But if she can earn just $500/month after tax on the side, then although it only increases her income by 20%, it increases her potential savings rate by a full 60%.  That makes a huge difference.

#2. Saving: Whether it’s keeping a budget or something else, find a pattern that fits for you and that keeps your savings going up.

A lot of pro athletes make millions and then go bankrupt five years later.  Johnny Depp made more money than a hundred people do in a lifetime, but spent it all buying things like $5 million cannons.

No amount of income can fix poor spending habits.

#3. Investments: This is where a lot of people go wrong.  They spend decades working and aren’t much richer than the day they started, because they haven’t been investing.  Then they find themselves vulnerable to layoffs and pension cuts.

Investing every month like clockwork, and achieving a good rate of return from a diversified portfolio, will allow you to reach financial freedom early.

One of the best ways to really push yourself to build wealth is to track it.  Most people don’t.

#3. Wealth-building isn’t always a smooth process

I started investing in stocks when I was 16.

Admittedly, I had NO IDEA what I was doing, since to me, a stock was “undervalued” if it dropped a lot in price recently, since it was less valuable than before, and that’s what Warren Buffett said to do, right?  Or something like that.

I didn’t know about price-to-earnings ratios, analyzing the discounted cash flows, or any other way to fundamentally value an investment like people who wear suits do.

But it was a start.

I was tired of being broke, and of always being uncertain about the future or how I would afford things like school.  I saw the two halves of my parents, and wanted to put their strengths together in such a way that I wouldn’t have the same struggles they did.

So, I read every book I could find on investing. I got excited about spreadsheets, and turned on by compound returns.  Warren Buffett (and Batman, let’s be real) was my hero.

When I was in college, I had it all figured out.  I knew what the typical starting salary for an engineer was, could figure out all the basic expenses of life and how to keep them small, and calculated that if I put $2,000 in inflation-adjusted dollars away per month, and achieve a 7% average return on my investments, my money would grow like this over my career:

But in my mid-twenties, my father passed away.

I encountered health problems of my own as well, which lasted for a few years and resulted in big medical bills that weren’t fully covered by insurance, which wasted many thousands of dollars while I was trying to work and save.  And my mother started needing financial support.

I hadn’t accounted for all that in my projections…

So, I started to go off track, and had a couple years where my wealth didn’t grow at all, and even went down one year.  My income was stagnant due to my lack of time and focus, and my expenses grew.

I eventually got it back on track, and started pushing my income up and expenses back down.

What I learned here was that we can’t compare ourselves to others.  I saw examples of people hitting a million dollars by age 30, or people whose net worth seemed to only go ever upward, and I thought, “what the hell!”

But everyone encounters different curveballs in life, and the worst thing you can do is let a temporary setback drive you permanently off course.

#4. Experiencing both the good and the bad in life is valuable

Most of us go through life fearing certain things, and financial topics are near the top of the list.

We worry that we’ll lose our jobs, we worry about debt or retirement, we worry about recessions, and many of us imagine the worst – what if we’re out on the street?  What if we’re homeless?

In ancient Greece and Rome, Stoics used to practice voluntary discomfort as a form of self-improvement.  They would identify things that they feared, and deliberately go out and experience them.  At that point they could say, “is this what I feared?”

Being homeless in my youth let me experience at least some small part of the rougher side of the spectrum.  All these years later, it still helps put things into perspective when I encounter day-to-day problems.

If not for that experience, I don’t think I’d be as committed to wealth-building and financial freedom as I am today.  But rather than stop there, I made a habit of practicing voluntary discomfort from time to time:

MMA Fighting — I spent 12 years doing mixed martial arts, especially during my teenage years.

I’ve been held down and punched repeatedly by a man twice my weight, on more than one occasion.  My left knee was broken in a sparring match and still makes some interesting sounds to this day.  I fractured my right thumb when I hit guy in the ribs with a hook punch and accidentally clipped his blocking elbow during my swing.  I’ve been choked to submission and slammed to the floor more times than I can count.  A professional fighter 15 pounds heavier and 15 years older than me beat me at a tournament so badly once that I cried a little.

To this day, it all makes a lot of things in life seem less scary.

Fasting — I used to think that if you don’t eat, you just keep getting hungrier and hungrier, which frightened me.  So, I decided to try a 3-day fast, with just water.

As it turns out, once you cross a certain point of not eating, the body starts to tap into its own body fat for fuel more readily.   If you go long enough, your brain starts running on ketones instead of glucose, which is known to suppress hunger in many people, and give you a sense of alertness.  Many people fast during religious or spiritual experiences, partially because it creates a sense of mental clarity and even mild euphoria.  I was less hungry on day 3 than I was on the first day, and I still occasionally do 1-day fasts.  (Disclaimer: Maybe check with your doctor first before trying any weird eating habits, especially if you’re on meds.)

That experience ended up coming in handy, because a few months later, my town was struck by a thunderstorm deadly enough to have a Wikipedia page about it.  I was about to go grocery shopping that morning, so literally the only food I had in my apartment when the storm hit was a single chocolate bar.

Power was out for miles, stores were closed or emptied out, and more fallen trees than I had ever seen in my life were blocking roads.  Three people were dead not too far away, and the county was declared a federal disaster area.  But because I had already experienced what fasting really felt like, I didn’t feel much to worry about, and just thought calmly about how I should best approach this and get supplies from somewhere, eventually.

It would have been a lot more stressful had I not already experienced what not eating is like.

Lack of Control — I’m an orderly person that likes to plan everything in advance and have multiple backup plans.  The idea of not being in control is unappealing.

So, I once flew to Argentina without telling a single person where I was going, and rented an apartment in a middle class non-touristy neighborhood of Buenos Aires for three weeks. I don’t speak a word of Spanish, and English isn’t very common there.

The whole trip consisted of me trying to navigate around the city to see things, with everything being 10x harder than usual because I didn’t know what I was doing and couldn’t speak very well.  But it was memorable, and reminds me how easy life is with a car, and where I can speak to people and read signs.

Final Words

There’s a Chinese proverb that goes, “wealth never survives three generations”.

From what Money Magazine has reported, it’s true.  A full 70% of wealthy families lose their wealth by the second generation, and 90% lose it by the third generation.

That’s an astounding statistic if you think about it.  Not only do most of them not continue to build wealth from their starting point; they actually lose what they already have.

Partly that’s because, according to the same article, 2/3rds of people don’t disclose almost anything about their wealth to their children.  As the next generation grows up, they often don’t have any of the money habits or hard work ethic of their parents that originally built the wealth from the ground up.

Naturally, parents want to give their children a better life than they had.  But often in doing so, the next generation becomes soft and pampered, unable to appreciate their money that they didn’t have to earn themselves, and never developing the skills to maintain and build what they have.

So, if you don’t have a lot of money and didn’t come from a well-off background, then take heart!

Although you may be disadvantaged in some ways, in other ways you have an advantage, because you’re hungry for more, and you have to create what you want from scratch.  Not a lot of people set out on a wealth-building lifestyle, but once you get on that train, you’ve got all the money habits in place that should keep you going up.

And if you did come from money, and don’t want to fall prey to the statistics, then try to continually rekindle that sense of energy and passion and vulnerability so that you can maintain all the advantages of having money without having the downsides of complacency.  Practicing voluntary discomfort is useful in that sense.

Either way, it’s important to push yourself, to stay fresh by experiencing multiple sides of the world, and to put yourself in new and uncomfortable situations to learn and grow from them.

But live below your means and save and invest like hell, so that as much of the discomfort as possible that you experience in life is by choice.

****** Lyn blogs over at LynAlden.com, and holds a bachelor’s in electronics engineering and a master’s in engineering management with a focus on engineering economics. Much of her work involves budget planning, technical procurement, and project management. On the side she does website development and freelance writing, and creates in-depth guides on financial topics.

What Being Homeless Taught Me About Money and Happiness published first on http://ift.tt/2ljLF4B