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chipsfics · 4 years

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Part 3 - Discovery/Creativity

Part 3 is here!

Rated: PG-13 (heavy themes, swearing)

WARNING! this chapter contains light mentions of self harm! please do not read if this will upset you!

~~~~ The next morning, It was surprisingly quiet- Everyone was doing their own thing, most were sleeping in due to the lazy feeling that comes with most sundays. Yinyang, of course, slept in. They were technically not allowed to leave the hotel until the game was over- But Yinyang didn't really have anywhere to go anyway. Even if he decided to go "home", he didn't have anything for him there- Everything he'd left behind didn't mean anything to him. The other contestants, though, were obviously itching for the show to finally close it's curtains. Cherries, Yinyang's roommate, spent most of their time bouncing ideas off each other and having dull conversations in almost frightening synchrony.

From what Yinyang overheard, they were getting impatient when it came to Inanimate Insanity's finale. In a way, Yinyang and Cherries were similar, but in a lot of ways they absolutely weren't. For one thing, the Cherries got along. Of course, things were okay. Yinyang was used to being cooped up, be it in his own mind, his own body- And Tissues obviously felt the same. He didn't get out much, for obvious reasons. Yinyang got up, yawning, stretching, and blinking slowly to life- It was around 1pm, and once they got up and fought for a little while over which toothbrush to use, they finally finished up their morning routine and exited their room. To their surprise, they found Tissues slumped against the wall next to their door, clutching a half full water bottle and snoring gently. Yinyang debated whether to wake him up. Eventually Yinyang nudged his shoulder gently.

"H...Wuhuh.." Tissues blinked awake and looked around.

"Tissues! What're you doing out here?" Yinyang said. "Are you alright?"

"Oh uhhh..." Tissues slowly seemed to be coming alive. "Wha.... Oh yeah, I- Sniff. Walked over here this mornin' and tried to knock on your door, but you guyse didn't answer. So i just waited," Tissues wiped his nose. "I guess i fell asleep. Was that... okay? Did i do something wrong?"

"Oh, no no, it's alright!" Yin reassured him. "Why did you come here in the first place?" Yang said plainly.

"I wanted to thank you," Tissues said, heaving himself up into a standing position. "For being so nice to me yesterday. I don't think I would be feeling so much better now if it weren't for you guyse," Tissues wobbled a bit, holding his head. "I mean... i still feel bad, but..." There was a small silence.

"O-oh. It's no problem," Yinyang answered bashfully. "Anything for a friend!" Yin added.

"A friend?" Tissues smiled, his eyes having a strange twinkle in them. Yinyang couldn't help but smile at his goofiness.

"Are you... Alright?? Do you need help getting back to your room?" Yin said, concerned.

"Hhuuhhh.. No. I wasn't gonna- I was gonna- uhh. ask if you wanted to uhhh. Hang out? Cause I was out of commission yesterday." Tissues stuttered.

"Well sure," Yinyang said, shrugging. "But what would we do?"

"Thats the thing. I didn't think of anything before i fell asleep," Tissues laughed awkwardly.

"Oh." Yinyang giggled. "We could just see if there's anything on downstairs,"

"Sure thing." Tissues smiled, and grabbed Yinyang's hand.

Down the elevator, through twisting orange-yellow hallways, two friends holding hands less out of affection and more just so they don't separate. Tissues' head suddenly jolted to the side and he stopped suddenly, inertia causing Yinyang to bump into him. This time the sheer force from the collision sent Tissues face first into the hotel carpet.

"God damnit." Yang cursed. "Be nice," Yin said, which earned him a small slap in the face. "Are you okay, Tissues?"

"HAAHH-" Tissues heaved himself up. "What is that?" Tissues pointed to a spot of orange wallpaper, near the floor in a small, slightly secluded corner of the hotel hallway.

"What is what?" Yang said, looking at where he was pointing. Upon closer inspection, the place where Tissues was pointing at looked... strange. Under the wallpaper, there seemed to be a small square imprint of something that looked a lot like a miniature door.

"Wait, you're right. There's definitely something there," Yinyang said.

Tissues scooted up closer to it on his knees and inspected the strange imprint. "It looks like something was wallpapered over here."

"Let's rip it open," Yang said devilishly. "No!! We don't know what it is," Yin said.

"Don't you wanna know, though?" Yang responded. "But- It might be private! Or dangerous," Yin said back. While the two were busy arguing, Tissues was already picking away at the wallpaper until he found somewhere where he could start ripping.

RRRIIIPPP... The wallpaper was surprisingly weak and yielded easily. The two halves instantly dropped their argument when they saw what was behind the wallpaper- A small wooden door made of darkly stained wood. It looked old, and the doorknob was missing. Just as they had expected- a mystery door. It was much too small for anyone to fit into, but it seemed like it could be pried open... What could possibly be inside?

"Should we open it?" Tissues said.

"No! We've seen enough. What if we get in trouble with OJ?" Yin whined. "So? Admit it, you also want to see what's behind there." Yang responded, obviously annoyed.

"We're not opening it." Yin said seriously.

"I'm gonna open it," Tissues said.

"Not you too, Tissues!" Yin gasped. Yang laughed. "Yes, yes open it!" He said, baring his sharp teeth.

Tissues tried to dig his fingers into the doorframe to open it up, and it came open easy as if it were magic. The inside was completely dark, an almost inky blackness- and the way the light was positioned wasn't illuminating what was inside. Tissues' jaw hung open. A small spider crawled out of the hole in a hurry, and he stumbled back in surprise.

"Woah... What do you think .... Do you have your phone..? We could use the flashlight." Yinyang said, and Tissues fumbled a bit before he reached up and plunged his hand into the top of his head, the slit where the actual tissue part of Tissues is dispensed- and he rummaged around inside himself for a couple seconds, much to Yinyang's surprise. Tissues pulled out his phone after a couple seconds, powering it on and struggling for a couple seconds before turning on the flashlight function. The beam of light cut through the darkness like a hot knife through butter. Both of them peered into the doorway.

The inside was almost empty, save for a large stack of what appeared to be magazines. The walls were made of bare planks of wood with insulation peeking through the cracks- as well as a huge pipe going along the back. After a couple seconds of hushed, awed silence, Tissues reached in and pulled out the large stack. It was covered in a thick layer of dust, as if nobody had touched it in a long time. Tissues blew on it, and dust flew into the air.

"HACK- COUGH, COUGH... HUHH.." Tissues examined the cover of the top magazine. It seemed to be very old- The paper was yellowed and it appeared to be a wildlife magazine. The cover was plastered all over with still- vibrant green flora with several small purple bugs resting on the leaves of the cover- Tissues held it up and Yinyang leaned in close to inspect the cover further. In big, black, blocky font was the name of the magazine in some kind of unfamiliar foreign language.

"Woah.... What's this doing here?" Tissues said. "Who do you think is hiding these?" He said, moving on to the next magazine, which seemed similar, but this time it appeared to be a magazine about cars- Super old ones. The next one was almost the same, except it looked to be a modeling and makeup magazine. All of them were in the same foreign language- which looked similar to Chinese or Korean.

"What in the world..?" Yinyang said. "Who knew... Stuff like this was hiding in the hotel. It was only built a couple years ago, and..." Yinyang trailed off mid-sentence when they flipped to a magazine that appeared to be advertising the very first Melife products. Big bulky computers, old monitors, and even the very first Flip MePhone were sprawled across the cover. "Woah.. This one's super old,"

"Do you think anyone would mind if we took these?" Tissues said aloud. "I think it'd be cool if we could look at em in detail," He continued. "But I don't know how to read this. Do you know what language this is?"

"Hmm. I don't know, actually." Yinyang said. "We don't speak anything but English and Italian."

"Hmmm.... I'll ask OJ about them. You two wait here and guard the magazines, I'm pretty sure I know where he's at." Tissues said, getting up. Before he could leave, Yinyang grabbed his wrist with a certain forcefulness.

"No. It's okay," Yinyang said, deadpan, without looking Tissues in the eyes.. "I really wanna read these. We'll return them later, I promise."

Tissues seemed a bit offput. "Wha.... Well... um... uhh. Sure," Tissues laughed. He wasn't about to start to argue. He sat back down and noticed that Yinyang was staring at a particular magazine. It was at the very bottom of the pile,

and looked to be a lot newer- It was in English too. It seemed like a crafting magazine, with buttons and sewing supplies on the cover. Yinyang was seemingly fixated on another fact, though, which was that a large white piece of paper was tucked in between two of the pages. He pulled it out slowly and saw that there was handwriting scrawled hastily on it in marker- Also in English.

"TRY MAKING A COLLAGE"

The two objects just stared at it in awe. "This thing just keeps getting weirder," Tissues said aloud. "Who do you think these are for?"

"I have no idea," Yinyang said, "Do you think...? Maybe whoever left it here was just waiting for someone to find it,"

"Maybe." Tissues said. "I still say we ask OJ,"

"Are you kidding? He'll kill us," Yang said. "We shouldn't have opened the door in the first place. But i agree, the last thing we need is him to be mad at us." Yin continued.

"You've got a point." Tissues said. "Do you want to.... Y'know, take them? The magazines?"

"Yeah, let's hurry. It's only a little while before someone notices and asks what we're doing," Yinyang said harshly.

"Hehe, our first mystery adventure together!" Tissues said, giggling in a hushed voice. He stacked the magazines hurriedly, giving half the stack to his partner in crime before they made a break for it. Tissues closed the small door behind him using his foot. The entire time running, Tissues was trying his best to keep up with his rushed gait that was less like a run and more like a waddle.

Up the elevator, through twisting orange-yellow hallways, and back to where they started from. The only person who caught them on the way up was Pickle- But he was absorbed in his headphones and didn't seem to really care what the two weirdos were up to. Once they got to their door- Tissues dropped the stack he was carrying and wiped the sweat off his forehead, trying to catch his breath.

"Ok, we're here, you got it from here?" Tissues said, out of breath. “Huff, huff..” Yinyang opened the door, and the Cherries were sitting in bed and reading 2 copies of the same book. He hastily sneaked past the twins, and placed the stack next to his bed, Tissues trailing after him. Yinyang flopped onto his bed and sighed.

"That was stressful!" Yin cried. "Well we made it," Yang continued.

"That was surely something," Tissues said, giggling. "I feel like i could take on the world... That was the most adventure i've had like, ever." Tissues climbed into Yinyang's bed and tucked himself in. "Goodnight, i'm going to bed and never getting up ever. My life is complete." Yinyang laughed and shoved him. He slipped and fell off the bed with a yelp.

"Hey! That was mean." Tissues said, laughing.

"Sorry!" Yin said, giggling and kicking the covers off so he could reach down and help Tissues crawl back up onto their bed. Tissues stumbled and ended up uncomfortably close to Yinyang's face, both of them starting to blush. Yinyang laughed, the same crystal clear, genuine laugh- Tissues couldn't help but smile as a warm feeling flooded his chest. Was this what having friends was like?

The rest of the night was spent together with the TV on. Cherries didn't seem to mind.

~~~~

WARNING: The next part has slight mentions of self harm. Beware and don’t read if this will upset you!

~~~~

By the time Yinyang woke up, Tissues was gone. He just assumed that he'd gone back to his room- Tissues' sleep schedule was entirely unpredictable. One of the many symptoms of his condition- Wait, his condi-shawn, but Yinyang always tended to sleep in. Even when he wanted to get up early, One half always argued to sleep longer until the other half gave in. He tossed and turned in his sleep a lot.

Yinyang woke up, cracked his knuckles, and looked over to the side of the bed. The magazines were still there, untouched, in the same haphazard skewed stack- The note kept echoing in their minds. Something so special, something so personal was living right under his nose in the hotel and he didn't even notice? The spiritual side of Yinyang couldn't help but think that the note was for him. A sign of some kind. It didn't help that it was so plainly ordering him to do something.

"TRY MAKING A COLLAGE"

The phrase bounced around inside his head like a ping pong ball. He sighed and got up, reaching his hand in between his mattress and his box spring- Rummaging around and pulling out an old pair of metal scissors with a black plastic handle. Yinyang looked at it and frowned, looked back at his wrist, which was scarred with criss-crosses, and put the scissors on his bedside table. It'd been a long time since he had last hurt himself, and he was determined to give that old pair of scissors new life. This was the most in sync his two halves had felt in a long time. Yin and Yang tend to get along well when they decide that something is serious. He got up out of bed, went downstairs clinging to the metal handle the entire way down, and knocked on the door of OJ's office.

"What is it?" OJ's voice answered from behind the door.

"It's just us. Can we borrow something?"

"Yinyang? What do you want?" OJ said, walking over to the door and opening it.

"Can we borrow some paper and some glue?" Yinyang said bashfully.

"What for?" OJ said, looking Yinyang up and down inquisitively.

"A.... collage." Yinyang said quietly.

"A what?" OJ said.

"It'sforacollage," Yinyang said again.

"Huh?"

"It's for. a. collage." Yinyang said, avoiding eye contact.

"Oh. Sure! I didn't take you as the arts and crafts type," OJ teased.

"Shut up or i'll drink you," Yang growled.

"Jeez, don't get snippy. I'll bring that out for ya, just give me a second. I've only got glue sticks, if that's okay?" OJ said. "And I don't have any magazines or pictures or anything like that. Do you have your own?"

"Yup. Sounds good," Yin said cheerily. "I'll bring everything back that I don't use,"

OJ turned around and looked inside one of his file cabinets- His office was usually cluttered and he only spent about an hour a day in there managing the hotel. He got what he needed, and handed Yinyang a medium sized piece of posterboard and a gluestick with the seal still unbroken. Yinyang nodded and grabbed them.

"Thanks!" He said.

"No problem!" OJ said, sighing and closing the office door behind him. Yinyang made their way back to their bedroom, thinking about what they were going to make. Yin and Yang had different ideas- But in their mindscape, they seemed to coexist and mash together into something wonderful and surreal, blending together into a mash of words and sounds and pictures. Before they knew it, they were sitting down sprawled on their bedroom floor organizing magazine clippings.

Yinyang just cut out anything that caught his eye. It felt good to be holding these scissors to make something beautiful and passionate instead of using them for harm- Most of the clippings he ended up cutting out were from the first 3 that he grabbed from the pile.

After that, it was just blur of scissors, paper and glue- He cut out every single Melife product almost surgically and filled their screens with butterflies. Cluttered imagery of thick vines twisting around scientific diagrams of the brain, monochrome intertwined with overgrown flora. His halves were working independently but smoothly communicating with one another- They had different visions, but the purpose of the collage as an art form is to combine things together into a slurry of emotions and vivid images. Once he was done, the finished collage was giant, beautiful and terrifying, a lot of the clippings hanging off of the edges of the posterboard.

Yinyang sat back and just stared at it for a while. He should make collages more often.

~~~~

About an hour later, Yinyang's MePhone started to vibrate and ring violently, and he jumped. Looking at the screen, it was an unsaved number- But he didn't usually get calls, so he answered it. "Hello?" "Uhhhhh Hai guyse, what's your favorite pizza topping?" It was unmistakably Tissues. "Ummm... Olives?" They said. "Ok BAI GUYSE!" Tissues said and immediately hung up the phone. Huh. Weird.

~~~~

#hope you enjoy!#tissyang #tissuyang #yissues #fanfic #fanfiction #ii #inanimate insanity #ii2

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yeeiguess · 4 years

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I lost the ask but if I remember correctly it was : Denki having vitiligo and hiding it with makeup and Katsuki finding out about it

(Warning for really fucking shitty parents who force him to hide it/think it’s disgusting etc and a panic attack )

Denki’s vitiligo started when he was around 6. As soon as the doctor explained what is was, his parents told him to hide. Which was pretty easy at first, when it was just a few discoloured patches here and here, but as it grew his parents’ disgust did too. Eventually, he started disliking it too.

He thought it was pretty, at first, strange but pretty. He wasn’t allowed to talk about it but he liked to draw the outlines and try to see what it reminded him off. He stopped pretty fast. After all, if wasn’t anything to be proud of, according to his parents.

When he couldn’t hide it under clothes anymore, his mom dragged him to a store -they rarely went out together- so they could buy makeup. The person who helped them find the correct shade was really kind, and didn’t comment on anything. Their hands were gentle when they took Denki’s to apply the product, and he got embarrassingly close to crying at that. He was a big boy, though, he wasn’t allowed to cry. Especially not in the middle of a store.

So he learnt to hide it, came back to the store and looked for the person of that day everytime. He hoped High School could be a new start. That he would be old enough to make his own decisions. But that’s just wishful thinking, and his parents don’t get any kinder with him. It’s worse, even, when they learn he wants to be a hero. There’s the habitual “you’re too stupid to do that” and a new “You really think you can be a hero when you’re like that ?” that hurt just as much.

He works his ass off and loses half his hours of sleep studying, and he gets accepted in UA anyway.

He makes sure to always have his makeup on- and if Mina asks about foundation he says it’s because he gets red easily and it’s embarrassing. He doesn’t draw on his skin anymore.

There’s no one like him, after all. The doctor said he wasn’t the only one who has vitiligo but he sure as hell hasn’t ever seen anyone else like him. Even less a hero. Heroes are perfect, and he’s not. (A part of him knows it’s stupid, because no one is perfect, but the idea that he’s wrong because of that thing he has no control over is so deeply implanted in him that he can’t think otherwise.)

Of course, his peaceful life where no one knew about it doesnt last. It gets so much harder once they get in the dorms -his parents happily send him there but not without threat and reminders that if people knew they would kick you out of school.

It’s Friday night, he received yet another bad grade and he’s exhausted. He turned down Sero when he asked if he would come to Game Night, inventing a headache that wouldn’t go. He scrubs the makeup off as soon as he gets in his room. He looks at the white patches all over his body for a few seconds before shame settles in his stomach and he looks away. He puts his pajamas on quickly and falls down onto his bed with a sigh.

His sleep schedule has been terrible ever since those months he spent studying to get into Yuuei, so he knows that even if he’s tired sleep won’t come until at least 1am. He tries anyway.

He gives up at midnight after turning around in his bed more time than he can count. He’s thirsty. He takes the empty bottle on his bedside table and opens his door quietly. Not everyone’s asleep, he knows, and being caught right now would suck. He takes the stairs and doesn’t switch the light on when he arrives to the kitchen. There’s no need to- he just has to do a quick wash and fill it again.

He’s rinsing the soap off when he hears footsteps. He stops breathing, hoping with all he has that whoever is coming won’t put the light on and see him. He turn back to the sink and hurries.

When he turns around, he can barely see Katsuki in the dark. They both look at each other, surprised, before Denki nods and run back to his room. He keeps his head low until he’s passed Katsuki.

The next morning, he’s woken up by knocks on his door. He groans and open an eye to see the time: it’s 7:47. Oh, he slept in today. Wow, he slept in ! He hasn’t woken up so late in... a very long time.

The knocks don’t stop and he gets up before one of his floormate complains about it. He puts a sweater on when there’s a chill dressing the hairs on his arms and open the door with a sigh.

Katsuki looks at him for two seconds before he pushes him out of the way and sits down at his desk. He let the books he has on his arms plop down on the wood and the sound it makes make Denki wince. It’s early.

“What is it ?”

“I know you got a bad grade, so we’re studying.”

“Now ? It’s Saturday ! It’s not even 8 !”

“Yes, now. You’re awake anyway.”

“Well, I wasn’t before you knocked.”

Denki’s standing next to Katsuki with his arms crossed when he looks up and see his reflection on the window.

He run to the bathroom, locks the door behind him and forces his breath to slow down. He doesn’t have any makeup on. And Katsuki saw it.

He’s going to think it’s disgusting and wrong, like Denki’s parents do and he’ll tell everyone and-

“What the fuck are you doing ?”

Denki can’t think, can’t breath, can’t look at himself.

“Opens the door, Pikachu. Fuck, I’ll open it myself and you don’t want that.”

Denki blindly reaches out to unlock it and get away as fast as he can. His rational mind can’t seem to work at the moment and he can only prepare himself to be hurt.

But when hands lay on his skin, they’re soft and hesitant. They open his finger gently but firmly so they stop gripping his hair, and when the silence becomes too much, Denki opens his eyes.

Katsuki’s looking at him, their hands together. He’s kneeling, non-threatening.

“Are you like that because I saw your vitiligo ?”

Denki closes his eyes again and tries to wrench his hands to his chest but Katsuki doesn’t let go. He puts their forehead together instead, and Denki can feel his breath on the wetness of his cheeks.

“You’re... beautiful.”

It’s a whisper, but they’re so close that Denki hears it clearly. It doesn’t make sense, though. He’s a mess, a total mess, and yet Katsuki’s eyes look back to him with affection. Or, thats what it seems like to Denki, at least.

He hugs Katsuki with all he has and sons and cries, for whoever knows how long. There’s knocks on his door at some point but they both ignore it. Katsuki is obviously not used to hug, if the way he put his arms awkwardly around Denki after a few minutes is anything to go by.

Later, they stand up and Denki does his best not to look in the mirror. They sit on his bed and he explains, just a bit. Talks about the diagnostic years ago and his parents reaction, and the way he used to love it. Katsuki gets angry, of course, but not at him.

“Your parents are shit, and they’re wrong. There’s nothing wrong with you. You don’t need to hide it.”

“Did you...”

“What ?”

They sit next to each other, shoulders touching. Denki wonders what would happen if he took Katsuki’s hand again.

“Did you mean it ? What you said earlier ?”

Katsuki looks away but his hears are red and it makes Denki smile. They start talking about something else, and before either of them notice they’re laying down, side by side. Katsuki’s fingers find Denki’s arm and he begins to trace with a feather like touch the light spaces, until Denki’s speech dies down. He closes his eyes and allow himself to appreciate the feeling. No one has ever touched him so delicately. Maybe his parents did, once. He can’t really remember.

It makes him cry again, and he remembers when he used to draw on it too at the start.

He still wears his makeup for a long time, but he slowly gets used to Katsuki’s eyes and hands on his bare skin. It gets easier to look at himself in the mirror, and Katsuki sends him links and pictures of heroes and other famous people with vitiligo, too. It helps a lot.

When they graduate, he moves out of his parents’ house and gets a flat with Katsuki. They tell their friends they’re together, and when he’s finally comfortable enough in his skin, Denki tells them about his vitiligo. They’re suprised but understanding, and they tell him they love him how he is, vitiligo or not.

Here’s another thing that ended up super long and the actual thing you asked for was super short 😎😎😎 I wanna write about him being trans...

Also I really need to learn how to put a ´next part under the cut’ thing because this must be SO annoying to scroll through

I did a few research on vitiligo but I hope I didn’t write/portray anything too incorrectly !

#bakukami #bkkmi ask #ask

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writingforloki · 5 years

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Sparks Fly

Chapter 3: Hit me with your best shock.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader.

Chapter summary: Your first combat training session with Bucky goes just how you’d expected it, shockingly.

A/N: I’m back!!! sorry for the mini hiatus, I had some ~personal~ stuff going on.

However, I’ll be way more on top of my writing from now on!!! Hope u enjoy this chapter, as always pls feel free to comment, ask questions and give me some constructive criticism in the comments.

Ao3 link.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

You went to bed feeling a bit more relaxed about your place in the compound, you had chatted with the group and started to feel more chill around them. However when your alarm woke you at 7.30 for your training session at 8am, chill was not how you were feeling. The annoying pinging shocked your eyes open and you grumbled patting your bed to try and find the source of the noise to make it stop. You hadn’t slept terribly to say it was your first night in a new bed, although it definitely helped that the bed was massive and extremely comfortable.

Pushing the covers off your body and letting the cool air do its thing and wake you up a little, you tried not to let the anxiety of a new day in a new place scare you too much, you had half an hour until your first training session and although it seemed counter productive to shower before your workout, you decided the water would wake you up, so you pulled yourself out of bed, grabbed your towel and headed to the bathroom.

You hopped in the shower and let the water run down your body tipping your face gently into the spray to try and wake yourself up. You started to think about what your first session would entail, how hard would it be? Would you embarrass yourself? Would the Winter soldier crack a smile? Were a few of the questions swimming around your brain. Knowing you couldn’t hide in the shower for ever, you made your way back to your room.

You opened your wardrobe to find something to wear to see that it had been decked out with an impressive amount of workout gear, you decided on a pair of black high waisted leggings with pale blue piping at the seam, along with the matching sports bra, you felt bougie as hell, you’d never been so coordinated before, so you pulled on an oversized white tee and tied it at the bottom, feeling better slightly more covered up.

It was 7.57am when you checked your watch and decided it was best if you headed to the training area of the compound, and although you had a vague idea of where it was, it was easy to get lost when all the halls all had the same uniform, slick, chrome finish to them. That’s how you found yourself at 8.05 starting to panic and none the wiser about your whereabouts in the massive compound. You had wanted to make a good impression, and being late didn’t strike you as the best way to do it, you had started to lose all hope until you saw a familiar figure walk through one of the slick doors in the hallway.

“Clint!” you sighed in relief as he spotted you and walked towards you, fiddling with something in his ear.

“Hey newbie, what you doing down here.” He asked head cocked to the side comically. He looked like a confused puppy.

“I’m supposed to have training with Bucky at eight but I got lost and now I’m late and I don’t want him to think I’m a slacker, it’s just these halls you know? All the doors look the same and I feel there should be signs up in this place!” You babble, unsure of whether you’re coherent or not at this point.

“Woah that was not easy for a semi-deaf dude to comprehend but I got the bit where you said you were lost, come on sparky follow me, I’ll deliver you to the grumpy soldier.” He laughed as he took you in the opposite you would’ve headed next.

However you didn’t manage to make it all the way to the gym before bumping into someone else, it was Bucky and he did seemed to fit the grumpy soldier profile pretty well as his face was the blank expression you’d come to expect from him, his mouth set in a straight line and his eyes looking impassive.

“I come bearing your dutiful student.” Clint extended his arm to you and you looked up at Bucky guiltily.

“I got lost, I’m sorry! You guys really should have signs in this place.” You mumbled repeating your earlier statement.

Buckys expression softened and it was only then that you relaxed enough to notice that he had his hair pulled back into a low bun. It was cute, you thought. Wait, since when was the kinda intimidating winter soldier cute? It was only Buckys voice in your ears that alerted you out of your inner man bun related turmoil.

“No worries, I was just coming to see if you were awake, C’mon the gyms this way.” He turned, you guessed he expected you to follow.

“Thanks Clint!” you turned on your heel and gave him a cheery wave as you embarked down the hallway, and he saluted you in response.

You followed Bucky into what you assumed was the gym, and judging by the vast amounts of workout equipment you were in the right place.

“Right, like Steve said yesterday we’re gonna start out light, a bit of boxing and some very light hand to hand combat lessons.” Bucky said as he turned to look at you, his eyes were a steel blue and deadly serious.

“Okay, sure sounds good.” You say and put your fists up doing a few small air punches in his direction before immediately feeling embarrassed and questioning what went through your mind when you decided to do that.

However to your relief the winter soldiers lips quirked into a smirk similar to the one you’d seen yesterday, it was small and it didn’t quite meet his eyes, but it made your embarrassment ebb a little, so you’d take it for now.

“C’mon then Muhammad Ali, time to warm up, you don’t wanna pull anything.” he said softly and led you to the centre of the room, encouraging you to copy what he was doing.

After your stretching was done and you were apparently warmed up, it was time for you to actually start training, to say you were apprehensive about it was an understatement.

“Just to warn you” you said throwing a sheepish look in Buckys direction “I’m gonna be terrible at this, I’m really clumsy, so I’d stand at least 5 feet away in case I sock you in the face, I don’t wanna hurt you.”

He laughed quietly, that smirk back on his face, “I don’t think a punch from you could do much damage sweetheart.” He drawled, coming to stand in front of you.

You flushed at the term of affection, although it seemed more patronising than affectionate, you still hadn’t expected it.

“So first we’re gonna start off with basic self defense, I know you have your abilities but you can’t depend on them all the time, sometimes you may be put in situations where your powers have been suppressed and you’ll have to rely on your fists to get yourself out alive.” His face was serious again and you tried your best to listen and concentrate on what he was saying but it was difficult when his body was getting closer to yours.

“We’re gonna start off simple, basic self defense remember, we’ll get to the combat stuff later okay, so a lot of things can happen when you’re on a mission that you don’t expect, people can come out of know where and surprise you, grabbing you from behind is common if they’ve been waiting for you to turn your back.” He positioned himself behind you, not close enough to be intrusive, but close enough to make you shift uncomfortably.

“You’re gonna wanna think of your attackers pressure points, so if someone came up behind you and grabbed you, like this -” His arms wrapped around you from behind, encasing you in his vice like grip.

“Your arms are pinned down, so there’s not much you can grab from my upper body, so you’ve gotta be thinking lower body, unless you just wanna head butt them of course but that might hurt you a little as well. So your gonna grab just above the knee and I want you to squeeze real hard, you should get the sciatic nerve which’ll distract them enough to let their arms down.” he broke his hold on you and suddenly you felt rather cold as his arms were taken off your body.

You turned to face him nodding slowly, taking in everything he had just said.

“Right so squeeze the leg real hard, possible backwards headbutt if that fails, then what?” you ask, eager to learn.

“You wanna take advantage of me dropping my hold on you, at this point you should be able to twist your body ‘round, so go for the chin.” he says gesturing his chin in the air as if you’d just swung for him.

“Like this?” you ask, fake punching his jaw with your fist punched up.

He smirked as he looked at your hand, grabbing it and gently unfurling your fingers. “No Doll, didn’t anyone ever teach you to throw a punch before? Don’t tuck your thumb into your hand, that’s an easy way to break it. Also for this you wanna be using the bottom of you palm, that way you can get the most force behind your blow.”

He straightened out your hand and demonstrated, pushing your hand against his jaw. You could feel his stubble scrape against your skin. You’d always had a thing for guys with a bit of scruff.

“Right, that, that makes sense.” You mumble as he releases your hand. “And to answer your question, why would anyone need to teach me how to punch when I can just give anyone who bothers me a shock.” you smirk and look up at him.

He smiles back and raises his hands in mock defense. “Thats fair, but let’s practice this again but put it faster into motion.”

Suddenly his arms are back around you in his vice like grip, you can feel his body pressed against your back, and your not used to having any men pressed up against you, never mind super buff super soldiers. You tell yourself that’s what makes you do it, it was the unfamiliarity of the situation which makes you press your hand and force an electric current his leg instead of squeezing his nerve.

He goes down straight away, grabbing his leg and releasing you, while the shock of the situation hits you and you realise what you just did.

“Oh my god, Sargent Barnes- I mean Bucky, shit I’m so sorry I just panicked when you boxed me in, I knew I wasn’t in control enough to be with you guys, i-i are you okay?” You ask, close to tears and frantic as you crouch to match his doubled over position.

“Hnnng yep, I’m okay, it’s fine, you just caught me off guard Doll.” He says between gritted teeth, straightening himself up again and shaking his leg a little.

“I’m so sorry, I- I just can’t always control it.” your voice was shakey and you could feel the tell tale signs of your eyes starting to prickle. God this was embarrassing.

“Hey don’t worry about it, super soldier, remember?” he said trying to catch your eye and failing when you dipped your head and stared at the floor. “Listen, I don’t know how much you know about me, but I’m an expert in knowing how it feels when you’re not in control of your own body.”

You look up at him, his gaze is soft and not at all what you had expected from the steely eyed winter soldier.

“So you’re okay?” you ask “You’re not hurt?”

“Nah Doll I’m fine, c’mon why don’t we leave the one on one combat stuff for a bit and i’ll talk you through basic pressure points, maybe I’ll even teach you how to throw a punch without breaking your hand.” He smiled gently.

What you had been expecting from Bucky Barnes, you weren’t sure, but it certainly wasn’t the level of kindness and understanding that he’d shown you today. It was nice knowing that someone else had experienced the struggle of not being in total control of their body, and knowing he’d managed to change it and take control.

“Hey Bucky” you mumble softly.

“Yeah Doll?” he asks, head tilted to one side.

“I know Steve said he usually trains the beginners but, would it be okay if you trained me, even when Steve comes back from his mission?” you asked shyly meeting his eyes as he looked back at you, his face a picture of shock before he plastered on a neutral expression.

“Of course.” he answered.

It wouldn’t be easy, but maybe with Buckys understanding, you could get better at all this, and maybe finally gain control over your abilities.

Tag list:

@latsyrc85x @jsmith509 @yourwonderbelle @mywinterwolf

#bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagine #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes reader insert #bucky barnes slow burn #marvel fic #mcu fic #bucky barnes #sebastian stan x reader #bucky barnes multichapter #sparks fly bucky #writingforbucky

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christinky · 6 years

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Heartbreak and Panic | Part 3

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Angst, heart break. What fits the theme so far really.

Summary: Steve, Tony and Sam go to take down Hydra and save Bucky. Can they get to him in time?

A/N: last part of this series! I am doing this part to @autumnstarks writing challenge (The same one I did for part 1) The Prompt is “I promise I’ll keep you safe” (Its at the very end if you search for it)

You pause. Turning around to see the two boys not following you, instead they are both looking at you with confused looks on their face. “What?” You ask, trying to figure out what their problem is.

“(Y/N), You can’t go” Steve tells you as he walks towards you, “Hydra is dangerous, you could get killed.” He places his hand on your shoulder to comfort you, to make sure you understood why you have to stay.

“I actually agree with Cap here,” Tony buts in, “you are staying here.” He walks past the two of you, stopping in the door way. “Get Sam to meet us on the jet, and (Y/N) you can hangout here or go home. Happy can drive you.” Tony says with a smirk, then he turns to head to the jet.

“Don’t worry (Y/N), we will find him.” Steve’s voice was soft, looking into his eyes you can see how sincere he is.

You really want to fight their decision, you want to go and help. You know you could take care of yourself, you are not some weak little girl who needs protecting. In your heart you know its not the time though. If you go you would be a distraction to them, they would focus on making sure you are okay rather than the mission. Taking down Hydra once and for all and saving Bucky is a lot more important than you proving a point at the moment.

Following the boys outside, you decide to take Tony’s offer to have Happy drive you home. You would rather be anxiously waiting at your own home than at Avenger’s tower. Getting into the car, you turn to Steve. You give him a smile with a nod, wishing him luck at to be careful. You don’t have to say anything, he knows what you meant.

*****************************************************************************************************

Back at your apartment, you feel like a total wreck. You lie on the couch, staring at the ceiling in silence. A few hours ago you were miserable because Bucky broke your heart. Now, well there is a little hope. Knowing that Hydra is threatening him helps you understand why he was so mean to you, but part of you still wonders if the whole Hydra thing was just an excuse for him to finally end it with you. Your mind is going crazy with all your different speculations, not to mention whether Bucky meant it or not, you still care about him. Knowing he is in trouble hurts you, you want to make sure he is okay. You would feel horrible if the worst case scenario happens.

It feels as if hours have gone by, you take a glance at the clock, its only been 15 minutes. You moan in agony as you sit up. A minute or so passes as you just stare blankly off into the distance. Feeling empty, you bring yourself to go shower. You still look like a mess, and now this added stress isn’t going to help your situation.

The hot water feels good against your skin. It helps waken you, making you feel something again. You close your eyes as you massage the shampoo in your hair. You can feel the knots and tangles from a few days of neglect. The steam from the shower helps calm you. You brush you hair, helping the shampoo rinse out then start to condition. Standing in the shower, you just let the water hit you as you start to think about the events from the last few hours.

So much happened, the past you have been miserable, beating yourself up, thinking that Bucky never loved you. Now he is missing, Hydra has been harassing him, he is reported dead, and... Then it hit you. Remembering Steve’s words hit you like a ton of bricks. You must have been so focused on everything else you just let them slide. Steve said Bucky was about to propose.

Thinking of his words help you feel hopeful. That when they do find Bucky, he will take you back, that he really didn’t mean his harsh words, he was only trying to protect you. You start to daydream, thinking of what the ring looks like, how he planned to ask, and how happy your lives would be as Mr. and Mrs. James Barnes.

Once you run out of hot water you decide to get out of the shower. You get some new lounge clothes to put on and wrap your hair in a towel. Checking the time, about a half hour has passed. You let out an annoyed sigh as your head flies back in sorrow. The agony of waiting is going to be your downfall.

However, your shower made your feel fresh with a new sense of hope. You decided to use this to try and be productive with everything you have let go in the past week. You put on your favorite throwback, feel good music to try and distract yourself as you clean, do laundry and get shit together.

*****************************************************************************************************

Thankfully the music helped you. Once you finish you notice that it has now been about 3.5 hours. Your mind feels clear and less stressed being in a clean and tidy apartment. It’s a lot cleaner than normal, it could have been subconscious stress cleaning. Either way the apartment was spotless, you don’t care how you got it like this.

You plop back on the couch, going back into dangerous territory, you let your thoughts wander. You start to daydream about what those boys are doing, if they found him yet, are they doing okay, then you start daydreaming of the best case scenario. In your heart you know better than to think of the best possible outcome, you can’t help yourself. Thinking of what it will be like when Bucky comes back to you, hugging him close, the sweet reunion you are desperately hoping for. You always know to prepare for the worst and hope for the best, but after this week, you think the worst already happened. What could possibly be worse than that?

*****************************************************************************************************The sound of your ringtone jerks you awake. You awaken in slight confusion, not meaning to take a nap in the first place. Grabbing your phone, you see that Steve is calling, you heart starts pounding seeing his name on the screen. Before answering you take a deep breath and compose yourself.

“Did you find him” You blurt out, wanting to get straight to the point, clearly giving away your priority.

“(Y/N)...” He pauses, thats all you need to hear. You know Bucky wasn't there, before you can spin into a downward spiral you try to turn things around. Thinking that if he isn’t there he is still out there, they didn’t find him yet, he hasn’t been hurt.

“Thats okay! We can find him!” you cut Steve off, trying to come up with an idea.

“How?” Steve was disappointed, you could tell, Bucky was his best friend after all, “We don’t know where he is, he has no phone, no means of contact. He thinks you hate him most likely, he thinks Hydra is still after him.”

Thats when it hits you, you get excited thinking that this will work perfectly. “Get Stark to have a press conference!” You shout it louder than you should, revealing that you are obviously sure this will work.

The confusion in Steve’s voice shows, “And what will that do?”

“You didn’t let me finish” You snap at him, “The two of you can announce that you have taken down the final Hydra facility, explain that there is reason to believe Bucky is still alive and get people to send in tips, or try to speak to Bucky through the media. The Avengers have a massive platform and following, your fans will spread the word and look out, and most likely it will be on the covers of newspapers and on the news.” You stop to catch your breath, “Steve... I know its a long shot but its our best chance.”

“Okay, I’ll have Stark send Happy to pick you up.”

“Me? um no.” You protest, “I don’t talk to press, I’m nobody. Plus it would mean more coming from you.”

“Thats true but if we want to get through to Bucky, seeing you there with us will help. If he thinks he lost you and you are mad it will only drive him away. If he sees you with us as we plead for his return, he will see that you are willing to forgive him and you still care about him.”

Rolling your eyes you cave, “Fine” you say unwillingly, “I’m not saying anything though.”

With that you hang up the phone. You sure hope this works, if not you aren’t sure what will since the last man hunt for him went oh so well. Realizing what just happened you spring off the couch and rush into the bathroom to get your hair and makeup looking decent then get dressed.

*****************************************************************************************************

During the conference you stood just behind Steve and he spoke to the press. In the perfect spot to be seen in almost all the photos and videos, to make sure you could be noticed.

Your plan worked great so far, Hydra being defeated and ‘Where is Bucky’ is everywhere. Now its just a waiting game.

It’s been a week since the conference. You couldn’t help but lose hope, thinking he should have reached out by now. If he hasn’t been seen or have made contact with anyone chances are he doesn’t want to be found or you were wrong and he really is dead. Steve checks in a few times a day, to make sure there hasn’t been any updates on your end. There never was.

You are forced to go about your day like nothing is wrong, like everything is normal. Hiding the fact that you are falling apart on the inside, your heart is breaking, you are finding it hard to be happy again with everything going on, thinking about everything you lost.

You are having a night in, again. Basically the summary of the past two weeks. The pizza delivery guy and grubhub driver know you pretty well at this point. Tonight you decided to order Mexican delivery. Perfect way to shake up your week of takeout.

Changing out of your work clothes, you put on some pajamas and tie your hair up. You turn on Brooklyn 99, a feel good show to keep you positive, as you wait for your food.

A few minutes pass, the wonderful sound of knocking on your door fills the apartment. You leap up, grabbing your purse, you are starving and cant wait to eat. As you walk to the door you try and fish out a tip, you open the door, dropping your purse in shock.

There he is. Bucky. His hair is a mess, he looks like a train wreck. He is looking down, trying to avoid eye contact. It doesn’t stop you from seeing the pain in his eyes. He looks horrible, you heartbreaks for him. However, no amount of heartbreak can hide the joy you feel seeing him again.

A smile comes across your lips, “Bucky!” You say softly but fully allowing Bucky to sense your excitement.

You bring your hand up to his cheek, lifting his face to see you. You give him a soft smile, holding back tears of joy. “I’m, I’m so sorry (Y/N)” His voice cracks.

Without hesitation you pull him into a hug, you feel him falling apart in your arms. You hold him tight, “Don’t worry, everything will be okay. I promise I’ll keep you safe.” you say as he instantly pulls away.

You flex your muscles and make an angry face, thats all you needed to do to make him smile.

“Oh yeah, I forgot how strong you are” His sarcasm hurt a little bit, but he wasn’t wrong.

You pull him inside, seeing the joy start fading from his face. Hoping to talk things over, just so you guys can get close to how things were before all this happened.

Permanent Taglist: @spiderlingsweb @saturn-aka-six

Heartbreak and Panic Taglist: @crazyinspiration @sadmilku

Other mutuals and those I want to tag :) : @hazsterfield @starksparker @fuck-off-lucas @foreverbeingthunderbuddy @vloggerparker

#nikkis writing challenge #bucky barnes #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes series #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky imagines #bucky one shot #bucky series

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doomedandstoned · 5 years

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SÂVER: Raging At Darkness, Stepping Into Light

~By Billy Goate~

When I heard that former Tombstones members were forming a new band called SÂVER, I knew it was going to be doomy, but I don't think I was prepared for an album of such immense breadth and ferocity. You think Slomatics or Conan can command a hall? Well, let's just say with S VER you're in the Hall of the Mountain King. As I listen, it's not hard to imagine an apocalyptic scenario where the SÂVER's powerful strains break out in the dead of night, echoing through nightmarish forests, over majestic mountains, and into the impenetrable dark of Norway's wild. I can't believe how perfectly this recording captures size, scope, and grandiosity of their sound.

They Came With Sunlight by SÂVER

A deep, quietly percussive bass note opens up "Distant Path" and is joined in short order by menacing reverb of the synth. Two minutes in, the guitar and drums join in the layers of crescendo. At last, Ole Christian Helstad joins the fruckus of this brewing storm, ever building, building, building towards its inevitably violent release. Five minutes into the song, a torrent of rain swells down, accompanied by a hail of steady notes on guitar. At the eight-minute mark, a terrifyingly grandiose symphony of raging vocals and the combined force of Helstad's explosive bass, Markus Støle's drums, and Ole Ulvik Rokseth's guitar brings us the apocalyptic moment we've all been waiting for. Simply put, it is jaw-droppingly huge. 'They Came With Sunlight' (2019) has officially begun.

The following track, "I, Vanish," would make a fine companion to Yob's "The Screen." It ticks and tocks and grinds its gears like the mechanical clock of some mad horologist, who watches each finely tuned movement closely to see if we are nearer to Doomsday. This and the succession of tracks that follow take us on an ethereal journey of sorts. The music gives a continual sense of flow -- whether with the echo of chords, the precise rhythms of repeated notes, or the fury of blinding tremolos, we are always moving, moving, moving. The complexity of movement may find some drawing comparisons with Black Cobra, Mastodon, perhaps even Tool and Meshuggah.

They Came With Sunlight by SÂVER

"Influx" breaks with this form just long enough to make us question what we thought was real. Are we awake in the real world or in some kind of a dream where the rules still aren't known? It feels like we are floating in a state of suspended animation. The lyrics throughout the album are obscure, making it hard to get a straight answer one way or another. Perhaps the point is to ponder the larger themes exposited by these opaque words, to free our minds to wander and explore the possibilities. I will say the interview that follows helps to clear up at least one or two mysteries for us, but overall the material remains high concept, abstract, and surreal.

They Came With Sunlight by SÂVER

"How They Envisioned Life" is the most heart-wrenching song of the lot. There is real pain here, as the singer lashes out with some of the purest rage on record at everything he believed to be true and faithful about his reality. There's also what appears to be a tug of war. The light wants him, the dark wants him. Is this a near-death experience? I'll let you be the judge.

"Step out of light!" - Dark Frozen by fright, left to survive Under the sky Leave!! Leave my soul to him!

They came - They saw How they envisioned life Embrace the warmth that I have left you with

Please let us stay Through depths and stone I see light

Leave – Leave my soul to him

They came - They saw How they envisioned light Your rage - minds covered This ancient hollowed out fight I have left you - Light

"Dissolve To Ashes" gets even stranger with references to "cosmic shuttles" and panicked attempts to find a path that will lead to light. Come to think of it, this is actually is starting to feel like the kind of things I dream about on the regular!

They Came With Sunlight by SÂVER

The ancient archetypal struggle between light and darkness comes to a head in the album's longest track, the twelve-and-a-half minute "Altered Light." There are hints that maybe the light isn't quite what it seems and that a little sleight of hand is involved when some people promise to show us the way.

I'd like to point out something I've not mentioned up to this point: melody. The riffs on this album are, for lack of a better expression, very "hummable." This means these little earworms will be working their magic on you long after you've walked away from the record. I've found myself humming or tapping the theme to this song at the grocery store, at work, while doing laundry, you name it. Look, I don't have the answers to the riddles presented by They Came WIth Sunlight. What I can offer you is SÂVER. Oh, and if you dig this kind of sound, be sure and check out Markus Støle and Ole Rokseth's other project HYMN.

Photograph by Adrian Kraakefingar Vindedal

Interview with SÂVER's Ole Rokseth

~Photographs by Pål Bellis~

“It sounds like war.”

Congratulations on a successful album launch via Pelagic Records and for debuting at the #10 spot on the Doom Charts with 'They Came With Sunlight' (2019).

Thanks, Billy! The response has been overwhelming. We are super stoked.

The last time we checked in, Tombstones had just disbanded and then I think I lost track of the story for a good two years after that. What was going on in the backdrop leading up to the formation of SÂVER?

We spent a year, more or less, in our rehearsal space after Tombstones, just writing new material without having a plan. I don't think it took that long before we knew we had to make something of it, so we talked alot about what type of band we wanted to start and what type of music we wanted to play. We all knew we wanted to do something different. So it's been a lot of experimenting with sounds and gear to get to where we are now.

What does the band’s name signify?

It means "sleep" or "sleeping" in an old Norwegian dialect, from out in the woods where Ole Helstad is from.

“We wanted to just leave.”

The opening line from “Dissolve To Ashes” starts with: “They came with sunlight” -- it’s also the title of the album. I’m used to song and album titles that refer to the menace of darkness and those that prey in the shadows, but here you’re anticipating the arrival of something with the dawn. Can you illuminate this?

I think that line, in particular, is spoken through someone or something else “on the other side.” The clean singing sort of amplifies that. At some point during the writing process, I painted this picture in my mind of three dudes just leaving the earth towards a better destination, in search of “The Light.” So most of the lyrics is based around that journey. I think people relate to that and that's why it's equally heavy as the typical “metal lyrics.” It's just about life, man.

“It's just about life, man.”

So much of metal is focused on pain, misery, death, subjugation, and very little is written about “the light” -- especially not in a style as heavy, so it really intrigues me.

Yes, well, I don't think there is any point in writing about stuff thats not from your own experiences and thought. We just sort of turned it all around and wrote about our journey away from death, shadows, and battleaxes. It was really about what all of us went through at the time. We wanted to just leave.

The tracks on They Came With Sunlight are huge. This and the recent Yob album are among the few that have been successful in writing cohesive long-form compositions that carry an effective dramatic arc. How does a piece like “I, Vanish” come together?

That song is based on a bass riff that Ole brought to the table one night. And I guess we just wrote it the way we know best. Weed, beer, and a sweaty rehearsal space with low lighting. We are all believers of repetition in music, and that song is all about that for sure. This whole album really came together naturally and I think it's because we all had a need to express ourselves in a different way than in other bands and we had a clear vision of what we wanted to do early on.

The production value is very high on the new album, capturing the depth, range, and power of your sound admirably. What have you learned about recording your sound now that’s different from when you first started recording albums with Tombstones a decades ago?

I always have all of these different ideas and thoughts on how to record the next album to make it better than what we have done before. But we always, at least in these types of bands, conclude that recording live is the only way. And having a studio tech that can provide good recordings of all the instruments is key. So we basically just do what we have been doing at rehearsals and know that the guys behind the desk just captures it at that moment. Joona Hassinen at Studio Underjord in Sweden was that guy, and he couldn't have done a better job. Everything sounded really good straight out of the mixing board, so we knew early on that this was gonna be a super heavy experience. That being said, we had a lot of weird accidents on this album, as well, that Joona decided to just leave in. Art by accident, dude. Always cool. We obviously added stuff after recording it live, but it's not really that far from it.

“Three dudes just leaving the earth towards a better destination in search of The Light.”

If nothing else, doom is surely infamous for its “low ‘n’ slow” approach. How in the name of Hades did you get such a damning sound on this record? What did you tune to, for example, on “Distant Path”?

It's that whole year of continuously hitting the rehearsal space, practicing and trying out different sounds. We knew we wanted to try and distance ourselves from all the other “doom” bands that are out there, but yet not losing ourselves and what we think sounds cool.

We tune in drop A, and the guitars have pretty thin string gauges to get that open, heavy sound. Not that much distortion either, to be honest. Most of the fuzz comes from Helstad's 215 bass cabinet. A Lot of the sound also came together after I bought a Fender Telecaster Deluxe and combined it with an older Peavey transistor head. Bringing a synthesizer to mix also opened a lot for us. I inherited a real passion for old and new synths from my brother. His collection of synths is out of this world -- thanks Pål.

As Joona said after re-amping the fuzz bass, “It sounds like war.” I will never stop trying out new gear and trying new weird shit, and that's a big part of me evolving as a musician.

Picking up from that last question, the level of tonal depth you were able to capture on this recording is truly remarkable. Without ever feeling muted or distorted, you’ve managed to capture the grandiosity and rumbling low-end of those bruising chords.

Joona basically just recorded -- with great technique and experience -- what we played then and there. If the song is heavy, and you believe in it, it's gonna come out heavy. No matter what amp you use or what pickup you have in you guitar. I'm pretty sure Jimi Hendrix would make a shitty B.C. Rich Warlock from 2009 sing and penetrate your soul in the same way he does with his Stratocaster.

What amps and gear did you use in the recording?

We recorded it live with the same set-up as we use at gigs and rehearsals. I won't get into all the pedal details. On guitar, I played through a stereo setup with 412 cabinets. Peavey Century Bass Series and and old Simms Watts 100. Well, bass was actually reamped, but Helstad uses his Rickenbacker 4003 through a Ampeg SVT Classic with an 810 cab and a Peavey Standard with a Peavey 215 cab. Markus, of course, can make any drum kit sound amazing, though I don't remember the particulars of what he used in this recording.

To record the synth parts, I borrowed his brother's Korg MS10 from the '70s. One of our all time favourite synthesizers, but it's old, rare, and not cheap, so recently I bought a Moog Sub Phatty that I bet you will hear more of on our next record. If people want to know more, we love talking gear. Come check us out live and have a chat.

How did you arrive at the decision to use synthesizers in these compositions, anyway?

I've been active in two other electronica-based bands: Gundelach and Hubbabubbaklubb. I got inspired by these two acts and my brother, who plays synth in those two bands, as well. As mentioned, he's got an enormous collection of vintage, kickass synthesizers. All of us love the sound of it and also electronic music, and we wanted to use that as a tool to divide our sound from the common doom band. You can expect more synth on the next album.

"Art by accident, dude. Always cool.”

How have your live performances gone so far? We’d love to have you back to the States sometime!

Really good! Again, the response has been overwhelming. As a band, it's really important to set goals, and we have met almost all of our goals to this date. It's crazy. We are really looking forward to next year! Playing the US has been a goal for all of us forever and is something we definitely want to make happen with S VER. Hopefully next year, Billy, we can meet up and have a beer.

The Great SÂVER Giveaway

The band has been kind enough to offer 15 free downloads of their new album to 15 lucky souls. Redeem one code below at pelagicrecords.bandcamp.com/yum.

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maximuswolf · 4 years

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Stop spreading probable false information about LSD potency and effect - a comment via /r/LSD

Stop spreading probable false information about LSD potency and effect - a comment

Im just baffled by people on here claiming ludicrous things day in and day out, for example taking ridicilous doses like 1000+µg and being "fully functional", chilling in the park alone at night or claiming that they achieved this "1000µg dose" by taking "4 tripple quadruple dipped super rainbow power ranger 250µg tabs", smoking a blunt and dropping a hand of other substances at the same time. Hell, even 400µg would be enough to make my point...

Cause they are not. No street tab has the same potency, if you have no reference you have no clue what you are talking about potency wise. Dealers sell a product, they dont know what the hell is on those tabs, thats why things like NBOME is sold as acid.

I am convinced that 90% of people have no reference whatsoever of what e.g.100µg of true LSD feel like and the tripreports i read about supposed 300, 500 or even 700µg etc. doses make one think that LSD starts taking effect at like 300µg but nothing could be further from the truth.

As a person who has legal access to officially lab-made actual LSD derivates (1P-LSD before it became illegal and now 1cp-LSD), just like many others in europe, I can say that most people who claim to have 150+µg random street tabs have nothing more than like 80µg tabs at max, or use heavily within their tolerance, when I compare their reports to personal experiences. I know that personal experiences vary heavily in between users but those differences cant be explained by the user entirely. Lets also assume that LSD derivates are directly converted into normal LSD as most of the little research there is shows. Yes tabs with high potency do exist but so do duds, NBOME and underdosed tabs.

Here is what one single tab of labmade 100µg of 1cp-LSD does to the user with no tolerance:

Heavy visuals, breathing and warping on everything, trees and textures flow constantly

Closed eye visuals of colors, patterns, things or people

Sense of touch, hearing, time and movement/speed become completely warped, strong disassociation with the surrounding, it looks and feels like everything is unknown and new. Things can feel wet even tho they are not, the outside of the skin can feel like the inside of the body, cracks or other sounds can seem like they take place right in your ear.

Intense euphoria and starting to grind teeth from comeup to peak

On the peak it becomes virtually impossible to have any sense of direction in a unknown environment or at night unless you have a cellphone or someone to guide you

Comedown: A feeling of exhaustion but fulfillment and inability to sleep which often ends in staying awake the complete night.

Mind is often overwhelmed with impressions and occasional panic and paranoia can settle in without noticing it which can lead to thought loops or a bad trip unless youre experienced or have a experienced guide.

The mental effect can not be described but one becomes extremely susceptible to things that happen around. Hear a police siren? The police is onto you. Hear your doorbell when the postman comes around? The police is onto you. See a suspicious looking car outside with someone sitting in there? The police is onto you. Your knowledge about human nature and interactions become completely warped and it is very hard to follow conversation or make sense out of sentences at all.

This is not meant as a post to ridicule people who are actual psychonauts and are experienced in meditation and tripping and are able to do and integrate doses of e.g. 500+µg, but as a warning to people who actually believe that they just bought tripple dipped 200µg tabs and that it is a good idea to take two of those because of things they read here and then write a trip report that reminds me of a 150µg trip at most.... Yes the chance that they actually are 200µg and not just 50 is pretty slim but if they are that person might go through a incredible trauma.

I myself almost took too much the first time because of platforms and reports like on here. instead I chose to "take it slow" and "only" take 150µg as a introduction, one and a half tabs of labmade acid which put me into almost ego death for an hour. This is not a drinking game, its not a race. Taking high doses cause of a challenge or forcing a profound experience is not good and should not be done. Doing less will get you to better places in your life. Yes You can take too much acid.

No not all bad trips are good trips in disguise. Some people cannot deal with a bad trip the same as others do especially when they dont inform themselves about the substance and dont even get me started to talk about usage in combination with e.g. Weed for new people.

So as I said. This post is not intended to be toxic or point fingers at people and I hope that you will finish reading before commenting. Peace.

Submitted October 07, 2020 at 05:29PM by cptpayday via reddit https://ift.tt/30IEt5e

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shetheaquarius · 5 years

Text

Confessions

Today I sat awake for hours dreading leaving my room but laying in my bed im so uncomfortable my sheets are soaked in us. You are everywhere. Theres a corona can on my night stand i cant throw out. Just so i know you were once here and it was real and wasnt just a dream.

I roll around my sheets back and forth and toss and turn and cry all night and hold this stuffed animal you gave me just trying to shake you away try to sleep. I don’t sleep its half in half out and then there is light.

I light incense and sandal wood and hold the light smoke in rotation around my heart and repeat to myself that i am love and light and that i believe in my following my heart. But i dont understand her anymore her tongue is twisted her ability to make sense has been taken from her in the cold long nights in my melancholy.

You said it yourself you love me but im asking to much. Asking you to treat me like a woman you love and hold close to your heart is too much. All i want is you to hold pride and value or my heart and life i so welcomely opened up to you.

I am depressed. I cant sleep eat or think straight and you texting me trying to get a rise just seeing your name makes my stomach twist. I feel sick i feel nauseous so much anxiety and the way you spoke to me.. the way you speak to me

You have always seen the worst in me.

Thats how youve always seen me that is all you see. My mistakes. My worst moments. My darkness.

None of my rich goodness.

My warm embrace

The love im my eyes

The light of my spirit

you project shame onto me and shame me for what i have already made amends with. We have both prevailed from our failures and it is unjust to constantly hold them against eachother.

in this relationship you couldnt even ever publicly come out and tell the world i exist. I feel as i am your dirty secret and i feel like our love has been a glorified and romanticized in my mind.

I am the only one that wanted this. You said it yourself.

Never made me feel like I mattered.. I could be thrown away and its just another day.

The first time you admitted you loved me was in a fiery rage.

Like a confession

A sin you have been hiding from the world

you screamed your love for me

scaring the curtains close

and the street lights dim

alley cats hid beneath cars.

Happy New Year

I have loved you since a long long time ago

I know it doesnt matter though you still want to go.

Then just leave baby Im letting you go im holding the door open walk out and say you tried thats all we have left to do if thats what u so desperately want here.

You tell me how much you dont want me. I get it your disgusted ashamed how could you be proud of a lady like me. Even though i am a pearl. A gem From the ocean brought to shore a product from heaven. I am timeless and worthy.

i am officially broken i give up leave me leave me go baby i cant keep watching myself die every night in my own arms cradling myself on the floor begging for help with no answer ..

were you ever really here anyways ? Or was it all in my head?

I cant beg you to stay. I cant keep embarrassing myself and pleading, pining for someone who so clearly doesn’t want me. Its killing me. My heart cracks.

It kills me to love you so much every single day with every part of me. to over and over again be overlooked and rejected.

i am so full of hurt if someone ran into me

my knee caps would crumble and i would be ash in the wind.

I am brittle and weak.

I dont remember what it feels like to be myself. All everyone does is tell me who i am.

I dont recognize any version that anyone describes

I love you. God do i love you hopelessly and endlessly and it is the death of me. I am dying from this addiction. It is eating me from the inside out my belly grumbles my eyes look through everything like one way windows i feel trapped and so alone and im so scared. Terrified i tremble at the night sky knowing a tomorrow is coming to swallow me whole.

I really only have me. And there isnt much left of her anymore and im scared that i have loved you so greatly i forgot to save any for me. I am utterly tormented by these emotions of feeling like im not beautiful enough or you werent capable of loving me enough because its just me. Im just simple me. Im not your extraordinary love i am just a stop on your path.

And all i want right now is to be wrong

I want to be wrong about it all

Tell me how wrong i am

But I know thats to much to ask of you and you cant. Im sorry im so sorry to ask so much of you my sweet sweet angel. I embrace all of you. I really truly hope you know how much i love you. More then this life more then the ocean more then the sun and moonlight and stars you are all of them into one being and i thank heavens for your existence. There isnt words to bring how i feel for you justice. I hope you know and remember how hard ive tried these years to mend our hearts and become one with you. You are my best friend i cherish you more then myself and maybe this is all my fault. How can you cherish me if i dont

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beck-a-leck · 3 years

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#49 boss/intern for Vishnal/Arthur would be great if thats a pairing you would write for!

Here you are Nonny! Vishnal/Arthur is not a ship I've ever written for, but I'll be damned if it wasn't fun. it's too much fun to play with Vishnal's obvious uh... attraction to authority figures.

I went back and forth a few times on whether I wanted this to be a Modern Office AU or an in-game canon AU where Vishnal gets assigned as Arthur's personal butler.

but I had a little more fun writing the Office AU, so here it is. Lowly employee Vishnal and New Boss Arthur, complete with teasing coworkers.

Ficlet AU Prompts

“Heads up, new boss alert.” Vishnal’s heart gave an unpleasant lurch as his head shot up from the spreadsheet he had been working on to crane over the sea of cubicles. Leon’s warning had been spot-on. There was a small group of important looking people all gathered around what used to be Mr. Volkanon’s office. The office had been cleared out of any of their former manager’s personal effects after his retirement party last Friday, and it looked like someone new was moving in this morning.

Vishnal skimmed the small crowd, wondering who among the besuited bodies was going to be their next manager. Almost all of them were older, at least in their fifties, but there was one younger man amongst them, blond, bespectacled, holding himself rigid and looking nervous with an armful of folders. Vishnal had to sympathize, he hated being the intern lackey dragged along with the higher-ups.

The thought crossed his mind that he should probably get back to work, but he realized he wasn’t the only one in the office scoping out the crowd for their new boss. Actually, the only one among them who appeared to still be diligently working was his other cubicle-mate, Clorica, who had dozed off while staring at her computer screen. Vishnal nudged her awake.

Clorica woke with a small gasp, automatically wiggling her mouse and putting her fingers on the keyboard and typing in a few nonsense characters, proclaiming in a rushed whisper, “I’m working, I’m awake. Wait…” She looked at Vishnal and Leon who was doing his best to hide as a breathy cough. “What’s going on?”

“New boss is in. didn’t think you’d want to miss it.”

“Oh.” Clorica joined the rest of the office in watching the group at the front.

The group was breaking up, several handshakes were exchanged, before one by one they all walked out of the office, leaving a familiar woman and the young intern behind.

Ms. Ventuswill was the general manager of their work group, Mr. Volkanon’s boss. Vishnal frowned slightly, she wasn’t taking over as their manager, was she? That seemed like a demotion for her.

She stepped forward, clearing her throat before saying in her normal, commanding voice, “May I have your attention please?” It was a needless request, she had everyone’s attention already, but she did stop the murmurs that were bubbling up across the office. Ms. Ventuswill smiled at the silence office. “I’ll make this quick, I’m sure you have plenty of work to do today and don’t need any further distractions. I would like to introduce you to your new manager, Mister Arthur Lawrence.”

The young blond man stepped forward and shifted his hold on his folders to offer the office a small wave. “Hello’s, I am really looking forward to working with all of you.” He was much softer spoken than his predecessor. Mr. Volkanon’s booming voice could be heart two floor away if he got into a particular mood. Still, Mr. Lawrence’s voice carried quite clearly all the way to Vishnal’s ears in the furthest cubicle. “I think we can all be a very cohesive team. I hope you won’t mind if I take some of your time today to meet each of you individually, but until then, I’ll let you get back to it.”

At that, Ms. Ventuswill and Mr. Lawrence turned to step into his office, closing the door behind them. Chatter erupted immediately in the office space as cubicle-mates quickly began discussing their new boss. Vishnal’s cubicle was not exempt from that.

“Did you hear that?” Leon demanded, dropping into his chair so he leaned over the back. “His name is Lawrence. You think he’s one of the CEO’s kids?”

Clorica tapped her chin thoughtfully before saying, “Yes, I think he is. I remember seeing him at a couple of the company gatherings.”

Leon scoffed. “Nepotism in its finest.” He propped his chin on the back of his chair and swung around in a slow arc. “So, how do you think he’ll be? Overly familiar, open-door, pushover? Useless and lazy slob? Or a micromanaging tight-ass who’s desperate to impress daddy with his first big boy job?”

“I don’t know, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.” Vishnal shrugged.

Leon hummed and spun around in a circle. “I bet he micromanages to impress daddy. He gives me that same small-anxious dog vibes that you do, Vis.”

“Hey! I do not micro-manage!”

Clorica snickered. “Only because you’re at the bottom of the food chain, mister color-coded-productivity tracker.”

Vishnal merely huffed and turned back to work. He would have to be more diligent than normal to make sure he got all of his work done with the added distractions today. His productivity tracker kept him organized, damnit, it was useful.

Mr. Lawrence worked through his personal introductions to their office group in order of seniority, it appeared, and Vishnal was the last one to go into his office. It was strange stepping into an office that had, just a few days ago, been covered with Mr. Volkanon’s personal touches – the man had a lot of grandchildren and plenty of pictures of all of them. The walls were still bare, freshly spackled and painted over to make a blank canvas for Mr. Lawrence’s décor of choice. All he had hung so far were two framed degrees, his Bachelor’s and a freshly obtained Master’s, but Vishnal spied a box sitting in a corner that looked like it had some more decorations tucked inside. Mr. Volkanon’s old desk had been replaced, as had his chair, with shiny new counterparts. Mr. Lawrence’s desk was already half covered with a scattering of paperwork and binders.

Vishnal paused in the doorway and knocked to announce his presence.

Mr. Lawrence looked up from the paper he was skimming and smiled, “Yes, come on it.” He walked around the desk and shook Vishnal’s hand. “Vishnal, right? Old Volkanon had nothing but good things to say about you.”

“O-oh, he did?” Vishnal’s brain forgot how to work briefly as he took in Mr. Lawrence. He was much more handsome up close than Vishnal had thought, and young – well, probably older than Vishnal, but still younger than any manager he’d ever known. His brown eyes sparkled, and his classes complimented the shape of his face, his impeccable suit fit him perfectly, cut to properly accentuate his lithe frame. He was vaguely aware that Mr. Lawrence was still speaking, he heard nothing because all him mind was doing was screaming a long, agonized “Ooooh nooo, he’s cute!”

He tuned in just in time to catch, “Go ahead and take a seat, I’d just like to take a minute to get to know you better.”

“Uh, yes Mister Lawrence.” Vishnal hurried to sit in the spare desk chair that had been rolled into the office.

“Please,” Mr. Lawrence tittered wearily, “Just call me Arthur. Mister Lawrence is my father, and I’m not nearly as much a stickler for formalities as he is.”

“Oh, okay, Arthur.” Vishnal liked the way that name rolled off his tongue. His anxiety on the other hand, didn’t quite care for that much informality between him and his new boss, and it was doing a wonderful job keeping a very tight leash on Vishnal’s imagination. Now was not the time to be fantasizing about the things he and his boss might do on this pristine new desk. Nope. Definitely not! To derail that train of thought, Vishnal tried a small joke. “I bet you’ve said that line about a hundred times today, huh?”

“Ninety-seven times, to be exact.” Mr. Law- Arthur smiled back weakly. Vishnal laughed weakly, realizing his joke had been recognized. “Really it’s more for logistics’ sake than anything. With half of my family working in this company, and a good portion of them my brothers, things get a little confusing with a dozen Mister Lawrences running around. That and it makes me feel old.” He shuddered comically and grinned. “I’m not even thirty yet, I can’t be a Mister.”

“Yeah, that makes sense. But I suppose it makes ordering company letter head much easier.”

Arthur laughed, genuinely this time, and it was such an endearing warm sound. “Yes, that it does.” Then the smile fell somewhat and he straightened the papers in front of him. “Now to business, I understand you’re our newest addition to the team. You just started… eight months ago?”

Vishnal somehow managed to keep his wild imagination in check over the next fifteen minutes and carried on an entirely professional conversation with his very cute new boss. How, he wasn’t entirely certain, because he was sure any moment Arthur would notice how flush Vishnal’s cheeks had become or how sweaty he suddenly was, or the nervous stuttering. But he said nothing about it and sent Vishnal back to work with another firm handshake and a smile.

Arthur must have just been polite, because as soon as Vishnal got back to his cubicle Leon called him out immediately. “Ooooh, I know that look. Someone’s got a crush on the new boss.”

“N-no I don’t!”

“But, Vis,” Clorica said, so sweetly and innocently. “Why is your face all red then?” She rolled over and gently poked on of Vishnal’s burning hot cheeks.

“Anxiety. I don’t do well with authority figures. I was nervous.”

His cubicle mates shared knowing looks and diabolical grins. “Uh-huh, sure,” Leon drawled. “A problem with authority figures.”

Vishnal brushed them off and turned back to his work, waking up the computer with a determined wiggle of the mouse. Leon would get bored eventually if he didn’t interact with him, and Clorica would eventually drop the game and get back to her own work. And so what if he had a little crush on their new boss? It was just a crush, perfectly normal and innocent and harmless. Even if his imagination was doing its best to bring up images of what the two of them could do in that office, or in the copy room, or maybe leaving early together on a Friday to go get some drinks…

“Oh look,” Clorica’s gleeful voice chimed in. “Now his ears are red too.”

#becky writes things #rune factory 4 #rf4 #rune factory #writing prompts #anonymous #replies #this was too much fun

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topicprinter · 5 years

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A couple months ago I asked for growth advices on this sub, it highly motivated me to discuss with people offering neutral feedbacks and advices as it wasn’t based on dogmatic and pre-formated models.Know I want to talk something that I think will benefits beginners entrepreneurs.Grab a cup of coffee and make yourself confortable, this one may ended to be a long thread ;-)Most of time we tend to talk about strategy, partnerships, sales etc, but what we tend to ignore or at least very few time express, is the entrepreneurship hard parts.I started to work on something that I until recently called my « project » almost four years ago.It all started with an idea and three people willing to work together.Unfortunately it didn’t goes according to the plan and we had to separate, I’ll not goes into details here as you can easily find the related topic where I explained that in great length.All in all, I kept contact with one of the three people we were back then and which is a close friend of me.From time to time we continued to talk about this project and to work on it separately as we followed our own careers path each other.Few months from now while hanging at a bar we decided that those years to sparely work on this project and the experiences we gained through our careers gives us maturity and a stronger basement to jump into the adventure for real.So, all in all, what changed since back then?I started to wake up at 4 O’clock in the morning a little bit more than a year and a half ago (Back in the army/early career situation \o/) and to embrace long and hard day of work.I cleaned up everything that cluttered my days and productivity such as way too regular laziness and procrastination.Don’t make me wrong here, procrastinating is good for entrepreneurs, it’s a great time where you’ll be able to think of you business, imagine and create new things or just evade a bit, but I was way too much procrastinating through my days and really spend precious hours.Regarding my 4 O’clock routine, I wont lie, it hurt, especially at the beginning when you took a nasty habit to wake up at 9 or 10 in the morning.But yet it’s rewarding in a magnitude that I wouldn’t have believed if not tested myself.First of all, it give you times, and that’s is the most precious thing that you could earn.Usually as soon as the alarm ring, I power on full light, it force you to immediately jump out of the bed. Once I’m up, I take the first 30 mins to read the news that are interesting for my business or useful to build it, to read my mails and answer those who don’t need an extensive response. That first 30 mins help me to light up my brain.Then I take a shower, it’s really important as it warm up your body and wash all remaining bit of sleepery.At this point it’s usually 5 in the morning, I grab my stuff and head to the office.As I got 30 mins of daily commute, as I’m lucky to live in a place with public transport services I can take advantage of that time to work on articles or documents that I wrote in order to sustain my business.5’30 I arrive at the office, and here is an important thing to know:As my business is in its early stage, I still have a regular job that hopefully I love, with a supportive employer which allow me to work on my own business at the office, until I don’t use our company intellectual properties or assets in order to build a concurrent company, and that I’m fully committed to my day job from 10 to 5 in the afternoon.As I’m not working on the same business that my employer we got a deal that let me 4 hours and a half to work on my product.So, during this time, I usually work on two aspects, the product development itself, and the business development. Usually I start working on the development part of things as the news and my commute gave me some ideas or answers to fast forward on issues that I’m stuck with from the previous day. Then I switch over to the business part of things as soon as I’m stuck with tedicious problems that would require me more than an hour to debug.As soon as 10’ is ringing and that my colleagues arrive, I immediately stop working on my business and fully jump on my regular job tasks and meetings until 5’ in the afternoon where I usually grab my bag and get back home.As on the morning, I use my commute time to look for information regarding the problems that I faced or questions that I’ve got regarding the business. That also usually the time where I’m syncing with my associate in order to avoid working on the same thing and be able to help him on its topics from a fresh eye perspective and he do the same on my problems too.Once arrived at home I immediately switch off all electronic devices (Except if I’m on my job on call night watch) and slow back down by cleaning the appartement, throwing garbage and cooking a bit. Once all of that is done I take a shower and head to bed with a book. At this point in time it’s usually 8’30, reading for 30’ usually gave me enough time to goes asleep for 9’ in the evening.All in all, the hard thing about such routine is to force yourself out of the bed, be strict about it and stick to the planning.As I don’t want to burnout of that routine I exclusively apply it from monday morning to friday morning and keep all my weekend free and available for social interactions with friends and family.I also give me room once in a month to get a drink or diner with my fellows at work as some are friends and that I do my best to get my business out of the road in my regular job context and don’t ostracize myself from our company culture which is really positive and warm.Sooooo, is such routine hard? Yes, it is, especially after that much time having another completely different one. Especially when you’ll have to be strict about your lifestyle and schedule in order to don’t mess with your health.Is that routine dangerous? I will not give you bullshit here. It absolutely can be if you’re not strict about your sleep time and don’t get an healthy life.I guarantee you’ll get in trouble in a month if you mess up.You’ll gain weight like never before, start to be depressed and I don’t even talked about health incident that you can trigger, so don’t mess up the your sleep and stop eating dirty and fast food. Don’t put too many salt/fat and extras within your dish. Stop drinking anything else than water or coffee/the, especially avoid alcohol and all soda or sugar full drinks.But is that routine rewarding? Oh boy! Definitely ! In an order of magnitude!Not only will you gain tremendous amount of times to achieve things, but you’ll gain peace of mind and find yourself more relaxed.Only few people are awake at that time. You’ll gain a less noisy environment, less crowded public transportation, roads and coffee shops :-) You won’t be in a hurry anymore and so less stressed by insignificant fear to miss an appointment or arrive late at work.One more thing to add, don’t use that routine because your ears about it in some random motivational videos. Do it on purpose. Do it because you need time to achieve something and feel that having a regular 9 to midnight life isn’t satisfying in regards of what you want to achieve. But don’t do it because it’s trendy.If you’re fine we your current schedule and lifestyle that’s fine. It’s perfectly fine to be a 9’ O’clock person and that won’t decide whether or not you’ll be able to build something important or have success in your life/career.However, if you feel you running out of time and always find yourself saying that you don’t get enough time to do things, I feel it’s worthy to try it for real and to for yourself to be committed on it.I hope this post will give you some appropriate answers and a good insight about this time management method.

#/r/entrepreneur #reddit

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