#all my fellow office workers know what i'm talking about

[coquelicoq]

lady and the tramp are to a single spaghetti noodle as office workers are to a row of data in a table print-out

[cinnamonest]

No no, because yandere Adachi has so much potential. Like imagine him getting attached to just some convenience store worker he sees daily on his way home. He’d be friendly, kind, and even warn her of being safe on her way home because of the killer loose. Oh? You’re near the end of your shift? Why not just let him take you home? He’s a cop, after all. He’s trustworthy. darling would never see it coming whenever he knocks her out and drags her into his apartment. He’d be so very cruel, too. Never taking her gag off, threatening her for one wrong move. He’d expect her to play right into his fantasies (be too frightened of him to fight back and then act just like a perfect wife/girlfriend, no misbehaving needed) while acting completely insufferable.

I have like an endless amount of ideas/scenarios for this.

(Crazy that I did not even remember what day it is/notice the perfect timing until just now as I was copying this to post, but HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOHRU ADACHI)

YOU get it anon. Also PLEASE share those ideas, same goes to all 2 of my fellow Adachi appreciators here, because I have so much to say about this awful man. I'm just gonna ramble a bit here

//nasty stuff here, the usual but extra dark/intense because this is Adachi we’re talking about so how could it not be

-----

Tohru absolutely utilizes his status as a cop to his advantage. He knows it adds an element of social trust, that you won't be as on-guard with him as you would any other guy. He’s there to protect the general public, to apprehend bad guys — of course he’s a good guy!

He loves that you appreciate it — that adorable little voice, before you got to know him well enough to go by a name-basis, where you'd say ‘thank you officer! Have a great day!’ whenever he stops by the store.

So cute, so pure, so innocent, he thinks.

He wants to ruin you.

The man has some violent, violent thoughts. He doesn't even try to keep things pure and wholesome when he thinks about you, nor even limited to normal perversions. The very day he meets you, he goes home and spends the rest of the day jerking off to imagining your squeals and cries and tears with his hands around your throat. Oh, how he wants to feel you struggle, afraid and confused and the way you'd feel so betrayed when the policeman you trusted to keep you safe is balls deep in every hole you have, holding you down with ease. You look like you'd be weak. God, it would be so easy—

No, it will. It will be so easy, because he will do it.

You're probably not aware of it either. Most girls aren't, he thinks, they have no idea how weak and easily overpowered they are. He of all people would know — even when they're fighting for their lives, they’re so weak.

But you should be weak. It’s cute. Just like how you should be scared, innocent, sweet, obedient… the man definitely is the type to construct an unrealistic idea of darling in his head as perfect, someone who has no flaws in his mind, and he would absolutely have a “purity” fixation… so if that illusion is shattered in any way, he becomes very spiteful.

Canonically, he develops a crush over a woman he doesn’t even know and feels entitled to women on sheer principle of liking them, going to the extent of a woman having her own life as a “betrayal”… you’re not exempt from the exact same thing.

So God forbid he find out you’ve ever had a boyfriend or lover of any kind in the past… or worse… he’s going home one day, expecting to see his adorable beloved and wave to her from the street, only to spot her hugging and holding hands with some other guy? To realize that she's had a boyfriend this whole time?

Oh, he loses it. No outwardly — not yet — but he goes home, punches a wall, seethes and paces around for a while before moping in bed for some time.

It’s like a switch flipped in his head. Ugh. It’s like a betrayal. How could you… and as he mopes, it becomes so very obvious that this was intentional. You led him on on purpose. What were you thinking, being nice to him? You obviously wanted him to like you. It feels malicious, it’s painful.

You’re so stupid, so naive. Dumb little whore. Don’t you realize you’re playing with fire? Didn’t you think about the consequences your actions would have?

Because oh, will they have consequences. No way is he letting you get away with doing this to him. You’ll pay for what you’ve done.

He entertains that idea at the peak of his bitter wallowing — it would be just as easy as before. You probably have a TV set in your home. He could break in and just…

No. Dammit, he’s already too attached to you. He’s known you personally for a while now. He can’t do that. He wants to keep you.

It’s okay… well, no, it’s not okay, but he’s a very generous guy, you know. If you apologize and beg good enough, he’ll even consider forgiving you.

And you do. You squirm and cry and claw at his hands when he holds you up by your throat. It’s not good enough the first time, but when he squeezes down hard and tells you to try harder, asks you if that’s the best you can do, you finally get it right, finally say how sorry you are and properly beg for him to not kill you.

It’s enough to adequately make amends and begin the atonement process, at least. You’ll have the rest of your lives together to complete that process.

He makes good use of you, after bringing you home. Darling is the perfect little squeeze toy to him. He deals with a lot of stress, you know? He spends all day getting yelled at and pushed around by Dojima, and underneath the bumbling airhead act, it makes him seethe. He used to go home and break things, punch walls, throw things… but now he doesn't have to do that. He can just take all that stress out on you and your poor holes.

Holding your head down with a painful grip in your hair with one hand, holding your hips up and jerking your body back against his, nails digging into your flesh with the other, ramming into you over and over until your insides are sore and raw. Or holding your head firmly in place as you gag and cough and try to pull your head away, fucking your throat with not even an ounce of mercy, jerking your head down all the way and holding it there when he cums down your throat.

The stress relief is verbal, too. Oh, he's so, so mean, calls you every degrading term you can think of when he's rutting into you.. but it also comes out outside of those times too. He vents to you, whether you care to really listen or not. Just goes on and on about everything that upsets him, how much he hates this and that, how he wishes this or that person would just die so he wouldn't have to deal with them anymore… you never really know how to respond, but thankfully he doesn't actually seem to be looking for much of a response, more just someone to listen to him. In truth, it almost makes you feel a little bad for him... but you try to stave off such thoughts.

But that's just his default. That's when he's having a decent day, just the natural amount of stress he has. When he's had a bad day, it's much worse.

You learn to tell when he's had a bad day the moment he walks through the door — you hear how harsh each motion is, how he opens and closes the door, his footsteps, even his breathing as he makes his way over to you. The gruff ‘come here’ as he storms over to you, the harshness with which you're dragged over to bed and thrown down.

Those days are more violent — you end up with scratches and bites and bruises all over your body, strands of hair coming out where he pulled so hard, holes twitching and spasming and cum pouring out of you as you lay there exhausted and sore (as for him, though, he's out like a light as soon as it's over, and the grip he keeps on you means you're not getting up again either).

Being a cop also gives him a lot of tools most people wouldn't have access to. He has easy access to handcuffs and weapons. The handcuffs keep you however he wants you positioned, and he'll use some on your ankles too if need be.

He’s used the stun gun on his belt as a threat plenty of times — you used to think he was bluffing, but one day you go too far and it turns out it's not a bluff at all. It's a horrible, horrible sensation… but even worse is the way he laughs while he shocks you, exhilarated by — and probably, honestly, getting off to — the way you squeal and spasm.

Unfortunately, it awakens something — maybe he could use it on you more often, put it right up to your most sensitive places and see how you react… although not without building up dread and anticipation first, pressing it to your skin so that you beg and cry and he taunts you so mercilessly, with that awful awful smile on his face, before pushing the button and hearing you cry.

...But he's not always so awful. He still includes you in his normal life, at least. You almost wish he didn't. It's this oddly domestic vibe, once all the brutality of the day is out and he's tired and bored.

You talk — at first you kept being annoying and pesting him about letting you go, to which — much to your dread, a pit in your stomach every time he says it — he tells you you're never leaving, so shut up about it. But eventually, with no one else to interact with, you talk about all sorts of things, sometimes almost feeling like a normal conversation with a friend. He brings home food for you, and admittedly, you're almost surprised by the fact that he actually does ask what you want and gets you something different from what he gets based on your tastes. You didn't expect that sort of consideration.

You watch TV (he keeps you chained out of actual reach of the TV itself, just in case you get any ideas), the news (only for him to awkwardly change the channel when your disappearance was being discussed on local news), he even takes your request once or twice to pick up a movie to watch (although he's very critical, particularly if it's too ‘girly’ for his tastes).

But he's still so, so mean, such a bully. You have a lot of time to reflect on it all, and one day you confront him with it — tell him that you know that the reason he does all of this to you, the reason he can't just be normal is because he's bitter and spiteful and afraid of rejection. At first, you sound angry — and as you speak, the way his face contorts with disgust and fury makes you think you may just push him over the edge to actually kill you, and frankly, at this point, it's something you're willing to accept.

But then, tears in your eyes, voice growing quieter, you add—

I really liked you… I thought you were a good guy…

That makes him pause. He gets quiet. You see his face fall to an expression you can't quite name, eyes half-lidded and mouth pulled into a taut line.

Finally, he shrugs, giving you a cruel, snide grin.

Not my fault you were so stupid.

That's all the response you get, and remarkably, that last comment seems to make him let go of being infuriated over everything else you said. For a moment, though, you swear you catch him looking down at the ground with a miserable expression, as if those words actually had a profound effect on him… but it lasts only a second — as soon as he catches you looking at him, his eyes fixate on you again, that smile you hate so much comes creeping back, and your heart sinks as he takes agonizingly slow footsteps over to your helpless, shivering little form….

[yxngbxkkie]

secret secret (y.j)

so, my lovely @thewxntersoldier made this moodboard, and it inspired me to write this fashion designer au 🤭 i hope you guys enjoy it! i think it's pretty cute ❤️‍🩹🫶🏻

You drink the scalding hot chocolate from your mug, humming a bit as you stare down at the design you're working on. After setting the mug down, you rest your chin against the palm of your hand.

"Why doesn't this look right?" You ask yourself with a sigh. You set your pencil down and lean back, cracking your back with the chair.

You decided to stay late at the office, wanting to work on your project without having your roommate up your ass. You're working on the last piece for the summer collection, but you're just not feeling it.

"Y/N?" Jeongin's voice softly calls out your name, startling you.

You twist around in your chair, seeing your friend and fellow co-worker standing in the doorway. "Jeongin, you scared me," you chuckle with a hand over your heart. "What are you doing here?"

"There's a fashion show coming up, so I was working on getting things ready for that," he mentions while stepping further into the room.

"Ah, yes. Pace's very first show. Are you excited? I bet Hyunjin is," you smile.

Jeongin hums in agreement as he sits down beside you. You grab your mug again, taking a longer sip from it. "It's all he can talk about, honestly," he laughs, his eyes looking over your design. "This is cute."

"You really think so? I'm not sure about it," you slump in your chair, shifting your gaze towards the sketch.

"No, it's definitely cute," he reassures you while grabbing the piece of paper. "I would choose a different color, though."

You scoot your chair closer to Jeongin, looking down at the design. "Is it too dark? I know the other outfits are a brighter color. Doesn't really match the same vibe," you mention and lift yourself from your chair before grabbing the other designs.

You grab the binder that sits on your desk, bringing it back to the table Jeongin's sitting at. His eyes glance towards you as you sit back down, opening it to show him what you have.

"This is what I have for the other pieces. And, I knew there wasn't something right about this one," you spread out your finished designs before pointing back to the one you're still working on.

Jeongin looks through your other designs, and you keep your eyes on him, trying to judge what he's thinking. He hums, nodding his head as he turns the page.

"Yeah, so, I personally would match the colors. I've noticed a lot of people really enjoy a collection that has a theme of sorts," he explains to you, his gaze meeting yours.

"Okay, yeah, I can do that," you smile at him. He pushes your binder back towards you before standing up from his seat. "Thank you for the advice, Innie. I appreciate it."

He waves his hand, a shy grin coming to his lips. "Oh, it's nothing. I know how dedicated you are to your work," Jeongin shrugs his shoulders.

"That's true, but your eye for fashion is… incredible," you laugh, gesticulating.

"Come on, stop," Jeongin almost whines, hiding his face in his hands.

Your heart flutters at his bashfulness, reaching a hand out to him. You smile fondly at the dark-haired man, getting out of your chair before wrapping your fingers around his wrist.

"It's the truth, Innie," you whisper, your faces inches away from each other.

Jeongin lifts his gaze, and your breath hitches in your throat when you lock eyes. Butterflies swarm around your stomach before you look away. You clear your throat while taking a step back, feeling your cheeks blush.

"It's getting late. I should really get going," you change the subject, tucking some hair behind your ears. "I'll see you in the morning."

After gathering your stuff up quickly, you walk towards the elevator when Jeongin calls out your name. You stop in your tracks to look back at him.

"Let me walk you home," he offers, catching up to you.

"Okay," you comply without hesitation, providing the taller man a small smile. "Oh - I don't want it to be out of your way, though. If anything, I can get a taxi or something."

Jeongin laughs and he shakes his head. "I overheard you talk to Felix about your apartment building one day. It's actually quite close to mine, so it's okay," he mentions as the two of you enter the elevator.

"Do you work tomorrow?" You ask him while stepping out of the elevator.

"I do," Jeongin laughs, running a hand through his hair. "I have a fashion show to prepare for, remember?"

You snap your fingers and let out an "ah!" The wind blows through your hair as you both walk down the street together. "What's your coffee order? I'll bring you one when I come in."

"Oh, you don't have to do that," Jeongin shakes his head, trying to dismiss the idea.

"Come on," you drag out, grabbing a hold of his arm. "It's the least I can do. I mean, you're walking me home."

You smile sweetly at him, giving him your best puppy-eyed look. "You're not going to take no for an answer, are you?" He asks with a shy chuckle, diverting his gaze to the ground.

"Nope!"

-

"Y/N?" Hyunjin calls out your name, causing you to lift your head. You hum in answer, pausing what you're doing. The tall brunette comes into the room with a Starbucks drink in his hand. "This is for you."

You furrow your brows as you take the pink drink from him. "I didn't order anything," you mention with a frown, setting the plastic cup on the table.

"Jeongin got it for you," he states with a slight smirk, leaning his hands on the table. "The two of you have been close lately."

You roll your eyes at Hyunjin before going back to sewing. "I told him I'd bring coffee one morning, and ever since then, we've been bringing each other drinks," you explain to him while finishing up the shirt you're designing.

"You two would be cute together," he suggests.

"We are not going to discuss my love life, Hyune," you laugh, taking a quick glance towards him. "Innie and I are just friends."

Your boss hums and pushes himself up, crossing his arms over his chest. "Well, if the two of you ever decide to be more than friends. You have my permission," Hyunjin winks before patting your shoulder.

"Get out of here," you joke with him, swatting your hand at him. Hyunjin laughs and avoids your attack.

He leaves you alone again, and you take a deep breath. You grab the pink drink from beside you before looking at the little sticker on it.

For my gorgeous designer <3

Your cheeks blush, and you can't help but smile. "Oh, you're cute," you whisper to yourself before taking a sip. You hum in delight, nodding your head as you set the drink back down.

You grab your phone and pull up your and Jeongin's messages.

To: Innie 🫶🏻

Thank you for the drink, handsome! 🥹 You didn't have to

It doesn't take long for him to respond, your phone vibrating only a minute later.

From: Innie 🫶🏻

You're welcome, gorgeous! 💓 I know I didn't have to, but I saw Starbucks, and I know just how much you like pink drinks 🤭

You giggle to yourself after reading his message, feeling like you're back in high school with how much you adore him.

To: Innie 🫶🏻

Ugh, you're too kind. What would I do without you?! Oh, BTW, Hyunjin said that we'd be cute together.

From: Innie 🫶🏻

Did he now? You're not upset about keeping us on the dl for now, are you?

To: Innie 🫶🏻

No, no, absolutely not. I know you wanted to wait until the fashion show was complete. I totally understand, and I don't mind keeping you to myself 😘

"Okay, good," Jeongin's voice echoes off the walls, causing you to jump in your seat.

You place a hand on your chest, narrowing your eyes at the dark-haired man. "What is with you scaring the shit out of me?" You huff, leaning back in your chair.

Jeongin laughs and places his hands on your shoulders. You look at him with a smile on your lips, and he looks around quickly before kissing your forehead.

"How's it going?" He asks you, his hands gently rubbing your arms.

You hum before sitting up straight. "It's going well. I'm about halfway done with creating the initial designs," you tell him, spinning in your chair.

His eyes stay on you as you get out of your chair, walking towards the mannequins on the other side of the room.

"Oh, is that it?" Jeongin asks while following you.

"Yeah! What do you think Mr. Stylist?" You ask him with a proud grin.

Jeongin drags his fingers along the pieces you made. "I like them. They're very… you," he mentions. "Can I see them on you?"

A laugh leaves your lips as you glance towards Jeongin. "You wanna see them on me? Why?" You ask curiously.

"I just want to see how they'd look on the most beautiful girl," he flirts, sending you a wink.

Your cheeks blush and you turn your head, looking away from him. "Oh, shut up," you mumble loud enough for him to hear, getting flustered.

"Come on," Jeongin presses, grabbing a hold of your hand. "Felix isn't here today so my office is free."

You wet your lips before looking back towards your designs. "Fine, but I'm only trying one of them on," you cave, looking up at your boyfriend.

"Can I pick?" He asks with a slight smirk.

You motion your hands towards your designs, silently telling him to go ahead. His smile widens before taking a step closer to the mannequins.

After Jeongin takes a few minutes to look each outfit over, he finally points to the one he likes best. "I like this one," he mentions while looking back at the dress. "I feel like it'd highlight your curves well."

"You think so?" You ask with flushed cheeks, moving to take the outfit off the mannequin.

He hums in response, gliding his hand across your lower back. "Oh, absolutely. Trust the Stylist, okay?" He jokes with you.

You giggle, hugging the outfit to your chest. "Okay," you whisper as the two of you leave your office space.

Both of you quickly walk to Jeongin's office, as a few of your fellow designers bid you goodnight. You smile and wave to them before you walk into his large office.

Jeongin closes the door behind him. "The dressing room is straight through the curtains," he informs you.

"Okay," you whisper, feeling a bit nervous. "Is it weird that I'm nervous?"

You turn to face him, standing right in front of the closed curtain. "Why are you nervous?" He asks with sincere brows. "Are you uncomfortable with doing this? Don't feel the need to do this for my sake."

"No, no, I'm not uncomfortable," you reassure him with a shake of your head. "I've just… I've never put my own designs on before."

Jeongin walks over to you before taking your face in his hands. "Do you want to?" You nod your head briefly. "Okay then. There's nothing to be nervous about. I'm quite obsessed with you."

You let out a snort. "Shut up," you mumble embarrassingly. Jeongin takes a quick glance towards the door before placing a short kiss on your lips.

"It's the truth. Now, go," he laughs, lightly pushing you past the curtains.

You smile widely and lean your forehead against the storage door beside you. He's so cute. You think to yourself before starting to undress.

While you're changing, someone knocks on Jeongin's office door. You pick your head up and stay quiet as Jeongin answers it. "Hey, Hyunjin," he greets his friend.

"Hey, have you seen Y/N? I want to make sure she's not staying too late again," he asks out of concern.

Your heart flutters, feeling grateful to have a boss and friend like Hyunjin. "I think she already left. I saw her leaving a bit ago," Jeongin lied to him.

"Okay, great. Oh, hey, I think you should ask her out," Hyunjin mentions, causing your cheeks to turn pink.

You tune out their conversation and focus on quietly changing into the outfit. You check yourself out in the mirror, feeling a bit flabbergasted.

"Y/N?" Jeongin's voice snaps you out of your thoughts. "Are you done?"

"Yeah!" You call out to him.

The curtain opens up, and Jeongin steps into the changing room. His eyes lit up at the sight of you. "Wow," he whispers, and you watch his gaze roam down your figure. "This looks incredible on you."

You fiddle with the skirt of the dress, smiling widely. "You think so?" You ask him, twirling around.

"Absolutely," he sighs contently, reducing the distance between the two of you. "You think you can make another so you can keep this?"

"Oh, I don't know," you tease him, feeling his hands rest on your hips. "I'll have to talk to the designer."

He smirks, leaning his face into your neck. "I can put in a good word," he giggles before gently kissing your neck.

"You can?! Well, that's good," you giggle some more.

Jeongin trails his lips up your neck, placing light kisses on your face. You scrunch your nose before kissing him, your hands going into his hair.

"How about you walk me home, lover boy?" You hum, nudging your nose against his.

"I can do that."

~

tagging: @thewxntersoldier @reddesert-healourblues @spacegirlstuff @foxinnie8 @moon0fthenight

[killjoy-prince]

Do you have any shoujo manga recommendations? I recently read Sasaki and Miyato and realised that I have been severly missing out!

Sure!! Thanks for asking me!

First, in case you haven't read it yet, Sasaki and Miyano has a spinoff that starts six months before the plot of Sasaki and Miyano called Hirano and Kagiura also by Shou Harusono.

This one focuses on Sasaki's friend, Hirano and his new dormmate, Kagiura. I know Sasaki had extra stories with them but the spinoff gave them an actual story. It currently has about 23 chapters and a light novel with the light novel being the first thing that happens chronologically. No anime for it as far as I know. The back of the first volume has a timeline of where events fit (this came out when Sasaki was up to Volume 5)

Speaking of novels, Sasaki and Miyano has two novels, one focusing on the characters' first year and one on their second year. I haven't read them yet so I'm not sure what exactly happens in them but if you can, check them out!

OK, now for other recs!

Wotakoi: Love Is Hard For Otaku by Fujita

This one is really cute! An office worker and otaku named Narumi Momose got dumped by her boyfriend when she got outed as one. Feeling awkward about running into him at work after the bad breakup, she quit her job and got a new one at a different company. This time, she's determined to keep her secret under wraps as to avoid another incident. However, this may prove to be hard when she finds out her childhood friend and fellow otaku Hirotaka Nifuji works at the company and almost outs her on her first day. She meets up with him after work to catch up and when Narumi tells him about her recent breakup, he asks her why not date an otaku. Specifically him. She rejects it at first but when he says he can help her in life, video games and with her booth at Comiket, she agrees.

There are three couples this series focuses on. The second couple knew each other since high school and have been dating for about a decade and work at the company with Narumi and Hirotaka. The third couple is the younger brother of Hirotaka and a gamer who goes to his college. It's a lighthearted comedy about office worker otakus and navigating their relationships. A lot of references to anime, video games, BL, GL, you name it. Like Sasaki, this was a webcomic posted on pixiv so the pacing and layout feel similar, at least to me. There are 11 volumes (6 volumes if you go by the English translation bc they combined two volumes into one for 5 of them and then the last one is by itself). I mainly got into this one bc Hirotaka was aesthetically my type. I remember seeing the first volume cover at kinokuniya when only the Japanese version was out and being like "I need to find out what this series is bc I need to meet him"

Kimi Ni Todoke by Karuho Shiina

This was a series I read when I was in high school. High school freshman Sawako Kuronuma has been feared and misunderstood by her peers all her life due to her appearance. It was so bad that her classmates call her Sadako since she looks like the character from The Ring. She had resigned to her fate of never making a friend until popular boy Kazehaya starts talking to her. The more time he spends talking to her, the more her world opens up and she starts making friends and experience things she hadn't been able to before this point. As they spend more time together, love blossoms between the two characters.

There are 30 volumes and 38 episodes. I read up to volume 18 and then stopped because that was the most recent volume at the time and I kinda forgot about by the time more volumes came out. But that was my fault not the manga because this series is really really cute!! A term I've coined for myself when I read this was whenever Kazehaya and Sawako were being cute together, I'd exclaimed "THESE ADORABLE LITTLE FUCKS!!" because they are so adorable to each other. The friends Sawako makes are really cool and fun in their own right. If you want some really cute, tooth rotting sweetness, I recommend this series.

Princess Jellyfish by Akiko Higashimura

Tsukimi Kurashita is a jellyfish fanatic that lives in Amamizukan, a woman only apartment building that houses other woman with their own fixations. They are considered NEETS and have a strict rule of no men allowed in their living space. Tsukimi's love for jellyfish came from going to a jellyfish aquarium with her mom before she died of an illness when Tsukimi was a kid. She goes to a pet shop regularly to visit a spotted jellyfish she's taken a fancy to that she named Kurara. When she sees that the employees put a moon jellyfish in the same tank, she fears for its life as the moon jellyfish will kill Kurara if not taken care of. However, her fear of talking to normal people lead to a misunderstanding with the employee until a stylish person comes to her rescue and they take Kurara back to Amamizukan. The next morning, Tsukimi finds out the stylish person she brought back to her home is an illegitimate son of a politician and cross-dresser named Kuranosuke Koibuchi.

There are 84 chapters and 11 episodes of this series. I read up to about chapter 74 before stopping for the same reason I did for Kimi Ni Todoke. It's a really fun time. The characters are funny and sweet, the situations are entertaining, it's just a fun o' time. And the art is really pretty!!

Skip and Loafer by Misaki Takamatsu

Mitsumi Iwakura moved from her small town on the outskirt of Ishikawa Prefecture to Tokyo to start high school. However, she gets lost going to school on the first day due to the culture shock and seems at a loss at what to do. That's when she meets Sosuke Shima who was late to school himself and travels with her to school. The series follows Mitsumi as she experiences school life in the city and meets lots of new people and makes friends with Sosuke along for the ride.

There's currently about 59 chapters and 12 episodes of this series. I started reading it when the anime was announced and I had a fun time reading it. I really enjoyed Mitsumi and seeing her learn and broaden her horizons as she goes to school and hang out with Sosuke and everyone else. It's a nice story!

Given by Natsuki Kizu

High school student Uenoyama Ritsuka is a guitarist in a instrumental only band with college students Akihiko Kaji and Haruki Nakayama. When going to his usual hiding spot for lunch, he finds Mafuyu Sato sleeping with a guitar with broken strings in his arms. Uenoyama offers to fix it and when he does and plays a note, Sato begs him to teach him how to play. Uenoyama is reluctant but gives in when Sato persists. After spending some time together, Uenoyama finds out that Sato has a beautiful singing voice and invites him to join his band.

There are 9 volumes, 11 episodes and a movie, with another movie on the way. The series focuses on three relationships. The first is the relationship between Uenoyama and Sato, the second between Akihiko and Haruki and the third between Sato's childhood friends Hiiragi and Shizusumi. The art is really pretty and the characters are so good!! I really enjoyed the story a lot! My favorite character is Hiiragi and I can't wait for the next movie to come out because they're gonna cover his story then and I wanna hear him sing!! (Also his seiyuu is Fumiya Imai AKA seiyuu for Akito Shinonome so double reason why I wanna hear it) Also, Imma use this as an excuse to post a page I really wanna see animated bc I can hear it so clearly in my head.

Bloom Into You by Nakatani Nio

Yuu Koito, lover of shoujo manga, always dreamed of being confessed to and experience that heart pounding feeling she sees happen in her books. However, when she's confessed to by a guy in middle school, she feels nothing and rejects him. Now starting high school, she's left confused on what her lack of feeling means. When she sees the student council president Touko Nanami turn down a boy, she asks her for help with her situation. But when Nanami confesses her love to Koito, will she feel that spark she's being hoping for? There's 8 volumes, 13 episodes and 3 light novels starring a side character. I'm up to volume 6 of this one and I'm really enjoying it!! The story is engaging, the charatcers are interesting. I like that Yuu isn't a pushover, she's a bit snarky and doesn't let Touko push her around. And I like how Touko comes off as a competent student council president but she has a more vulnerable side that she only shows Yuu. They pair nicely with each other.

Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun by Izumi Tsubaki

OK I know you know this one already but this wouldn't be a rec list made by me if I didn't include it. This is my favorite series ever. It's mecore. Me-coded. Me. Second year high schooler Chiyo Sakura finally gets the courage to confess her love to Umetarou Nozaki, a guy in her grade. However, she messes up the confession and says she's his biggest fan instead of "I like you". Nozaki, in response, gives her his autograph and then invites her to his house. She accepts but once they get there, he has her do inking on a manga he makes. Turns out, Nozaki is a manga artist under the pen name Sakiko Yumeno and he's had his eye on Sakura for a while because he wanted to bring her onto his team as an inker. She agrees to join so she can get closer to him.

There's currently 14 volumes, 12 episodes and an OVA split into six 5-mintue parts. This series has me dying of laughter with every chapter. The characters are fun, the story is fun, it's just a fun time! There are three main couples with some side couples and duos that get their own time in the spotlight as well. The main ones are Sakura and Nozaki, Sakura's friend Yuzuki Seo and Nozaki's screentone assistant and first year Hirotaka Wakamatsu, and Nozaki's background artist and third year theater club president Masayuki Hori and "Prince of the Drama Club" Yuu Kashima. Other characters like Mikoto "Mikorin" Mikoshiba, Mayu Nozaki, Yukari Miyako, Ken Miyamae, and Mitsuya Maeno all bring their own brand of fun to the table. This series made me laugh so much I couldn't read it in class to slack off because I'd laugh out loud and disrupt class. I've yet to read another series that made me do that. I cannot recommend this series enough. Please read AND watch it if you have not already. Nozaki is starting to gain awarness. I lose my mind whenever I see it happen. I wanna see it happen. It's been 13 years!

Imma put an honorable mention here because I haven't read or watch it yet but I've heard Horimiya written by HERO and illustrated by Daisuke Hagiwara is really good. I wanted to but just haven't gotten around to it yet.

That's all I have for right now! If you've already read/watched all of these already, lmk and I'll list some more!! Hope you enjoy! ^_^

[surrexi]

so i've been working at my new job for a little over two months now. i'm supposed to be having weekly one-on-one meetings with my boss to track how i'm settling in etc but because he's outrageously busy (like, the kind of busy that indicates there really should be two people with his job) i'm really having them every two weeks or so.

anyway i had one today, about an hour and a half before the end of the day. and it was going all right, if a little awkward because i'm a socially awkward penguin and i don't know how to mask right yet in corporate land. we were going over the various projects i'm working on, pretty normal, except every so often my boss would make an aside comment that would make me worry Something Was Wrong.

finally at the end of the meeting he's like "so there's a couple things that have been brought to my attention" (did not specify what things, like if it was something i said or i way i handled a situation or work that i did). he sends me a link to a training module he's working on building and points out a specific section that talks about a particular business dude's book about how to be a good team member, which says the key is to be humble, hungry, and (people-)smart.

boss is like "before i talk to you about [the unspecified reasons i am being made to feel vaguely in trouble], i want you to look this over and think about it. and we'll pick this up in our next meeting."

which is currently scheduled for next friday, but he's traveling that day so he absolutely might put it off longer.

he also made sure to say multiple times that if someone doesn't agree with this business dude's take on team building it's fine but also it means they won't fit on boss' team and to mention that although "many states" are at-will employment states (meaning during your first 90 days an employer can fire you without having a reason; note that texas is one such state but he weirdly didn't mention it), the company we work for "doesn't do that," which boss thinks is "very generous" of them because when he was a disney exec disney would absolutely fire the shit out of people at the drop of a hat.

so now i have NO IDEA what i did to make someone upset and/or angry at me or what i did wrong, but by god i have at least a week to obsess over (a) what i did and (b) who the fuck narc'd on me without idk TALKING TO ME FIRST?!

boss has said way more about his weird libertarian politics than i have about my own politics, i have only mentioned my religion in passing/in the context of discussing easter weekend plans with a coworker. i don't think i've behaved inappropriately or confrontationally with any of my coworkers, like with my anxiety i'm always worrying about doing my best to be clear and polite and not make people hate me lolsob.

the only thing i've thought of so far is that i've been pretty firm about working 8-hour days/40-hour weeks unless there's a concrete reason to graciously donate my time since my company doesn't do overtime pay and i'm salaried/exempt. like i have never said i would never work overtime and there's already been several days where i worked an extra 30 minutes to an hour that, again, i do not get paid for. unsurprisingly, boss frames being salaried as "we get to work more than 40 hours a week without it being a hassle because of overtime rules." and i do make offhand pro-labor comments/jokes a lot, but i haven't actually, like, threatened to unionize my fellow office workers. i live in texas ffs, if you say the word union too loud the cops show up.

i just feel like this is unhinged levels of psychological warfare from my boss and it took me SO LONG to find this job but now i'm like... maybe i'm not a good fit for your humble/hungry/smart team, bro. but god knows i don't want to be unemployed again. i just got decent health insurance! i can pay my own rent! and buy groceries and medicine!

ugh. why is everything hard.

[doyouknowbtsswag]

Out Of Character |Han Jae Joon|

I literally see no ff on this man go watch Doctor Stranger it’s so good

(Spoiler alert)

I sighed laying on my bed tired from the night shift I just had. Unfortunately being one of the top doctors at the hospital I had to go in more frequently. I got up my hair a mess and my eyes red from lack of sleep. I looked over at the clock seeing that I was most definitely going to be late. I walked to my small bathroom looking myself in the mirror. I brushed my teeth and splashed water on my face to try and wake myself up. I brushed my hair and pulled it into a highish ponytail. I applied a little makeup not much considering how much time I had. I changed into a white button-up shirt with a black skirt. I made sure to wear a pair of spandex shorts underneath. I changed into black flats and grabbed my keys running out of my apartment. I got into my car and drove to the hospital. I groaned realizing I forgot my water bottle, not that it matters I'll probably end up drinking coffee instead. I heard my phone start to ring but ignored it considering I was driving and didn't want to get into an accident. Once I made it I quickly found a parking spot and went straight to my office. I waved hello to some of my fellow workers and made it to my office. I put my doctor's jacket on making sure I was more presentable. I sat on my chair and looked at the schedule. Great booked for surgery in an hour.

"You didn't answer your calls"

I looked up and saw Jae Joon with two coffee cups in his hands. He handed me a cup before sitting down in front of me.

"Good morning to you too" I mumbled drinking my coffee. "I was rushing to get here so I couldn't pick it up."

"I told you to rest," He said concerned. "You'll be the one in the hospital"

"What are you, my dad?" I said.

"I heard you have surgery at 12," He said taking a sip from his cup.

"Yeah I'm looking at the scan now," I said looking at my computer screen. "It looks like an angioplasty, there are only a few values I have to work with."

"Be careful with that one" He said pointing to a part of the scan. "That would be the one to start with"

I nodded making a mental note to myself. I felt a hand on the time of mine and a small tug.

"Come on let's walk outside to wake you up"

"Why" I whined "Don't you have work to do? Plus I have work to do"

"If your talking paperwork for patients no I finished it all last night" He tugged my arm. "It won't be that long 20 minutes"

"Talk about me needing rest" I grumbled as we made our way outside the nice breeze making me relax a bit. "But fine"

"Your good at what you do at your age," He said looking forward there wasn't too much of an age gap he was only in his early thirties and I'm in my middle to late twenties.

"Guess I studied hard enough" Little did he know it wasn't my choice. He doesn't know about the things I've been through or the people I lost. He only knows that I'm looking for my brother who I lost a few years ago trying to escape the hell hole we lived in.

Flashback

"We're cornered," I said panicking trying my best to stay calm.

Everything seemed to have happened in a blur. My brother's girlfriend clinging to life and our plan failing. Hoon managed to get us out of the building but not out of safety. There was nothing we could do considering there wasn't any transportation except for a motorcycle. One motorcycle that can only ride two people. I looked at Hoon and he looked at me. I started to tear up at my brother's frantic look.

"Just go," I said holding back tears. "I can our run them and hide, you take Jaehee"

"I can't leave you behind," He said tearing up himself.

"You have to," I said and pulled the motorcycle over. "I'll find you"

"I can't"

"Hey I'll find you" I smiled crying. "Pinky promise"

"Pinky promise," He said his voice cracking.

"Now go!" I said giving him one last hug as I watched him drive off. I saw cars drive after him and prayed he'd be safe.

"There's one" I heard someone say and looked over seeing a man with a gun.

"Shit" I bolted to a populated place a bullet skimmed through my shoulder but thankfully didn't do much damage. I ran into one of the stores to hopefully get out of his trail. I gulped and watched him pass the store making sure to hide behind the shelf. I sat there until the store closed and walked out having nowhere to go.

"Hello? Earth to Y/n?" I saw a hand wave in front of me.

"Are you okay?" Jae Joon said placing his hand on my back. "Do you want me to do the surgery?"

"No, it's fine I just spaced out" I mumbled. "So what were we talking about?"

"Nothing important," He said taking a sip of his coffee. "Do you need a water bottle?"

"Why would I need a water bottle?"

"I didn't see it in your office and it sticks out when it's there because of how many stickers you have on it."

"I was in a rush like I told you"

"Your gonna be the end of me and I don't say that often"

"Whatever" I smiled rolling my eyes. "You have to admit you love me though"

"I do very much that's why you need sleep," He said seriously.

"You act so out of character when no one's around" I smiled. "I like it"

"I'm just more comfortable around you"

"Look at the time I have to get going now"

"Good luck, remember about that one valve"

"I will" I smiled and kissed his cheek jogging inside to where I needed to go.

[sailorsenshishitposter]

MGR office au part 7 - a day in the life of Steven Armstrong

Armstrong lifted his finger off the button of the speaker and took a drag from his cigarette. He sat back in his office chair and rested his head in his hands. "What a mess that I've gotten myself into. I'll have to remedy this tomorrow. I can't let a scandal of this nature reach the public." It was settled. Tomorrow's lesson would be about sexual harassment in the workplace.

The next day and the four Desperado employees were sitting down in their new office. Mistral was applying her lipstick, Monsoon was checking Discord, Sundowner was drawing stick figures killing each other and Sam had his head rested on the desk while he tried to get some extra beauty sleep. The next thing they knew, Armstrong barged through the door hard enough to leave cracks in the wall (causing Sam to double jump in terror). He slammed his giant hulk like fists on the table.

"Alright everyone, I believe we all know why we're here but for those of you that don't, we had a little... incident yesterday-" Sam immediately cut in. "YOU CAME INTO MY ROOM WHILE I WAS NAKED!" Armstrong fixed his glasses. "As I was saying... due to said event, I've come to the realization that we need to have a lesson on sexual harassment in the work place." Monsoon raised his hand and interrupted. "Sir, why are we being collectively punished for your actions?"

"This isn't just about me but all of you. May I remind everyone that not one but two of you decided to come on to me? After all, I know one of you was the one that pulled the stunt that led to said event." "Please don't remind us!" cried Mistral. "All right then, let's get down to the basics. Rule one: No dating your fellow co-workers." No one was surprised to hear that.

"Number two: You know the American saying of "no shirts, no shoes, no service?" It will be like that but all cyborgs must wear their combat enhancements and all human employees shall wear their exoskeletons if they have been provided one." Sam raised his hand. "Well I was in my room. Are you telling me that I'm to bathe and sleep clothed?" In hindsight it did sound kind of ridiculous. "All right. Bathrooms and bedrooms shall be the only spaces where this rule doesn't apply."

"And finally, rule number three: No sexual or romantic relations at headquarters. That includes bringing over dates and sending sexually explicit transmissions from the building." Everyone began to protest. Everything from "This is America and I'll be damned if I let you take away my rights", "That's totally unfair! You're not my dad!" to "How am I supposed to talk to my Discord kitten now!" and "You can take away my phone privellges but I will be damned if you think that's going to stop me from obliterating that twinks ass!"

"Hey, I don't make the rules, I just enforce them." Sundowner then raised his hand. "Can we still pee in the drinking fountains?" Everyone stopped and did a double take. "Did you just say that you pee in our drinking fountains!?" The cyborg glanced down at the floor. "NO! I just meant.. if ya know... say someone ever wanted to..." No one was buying it. Armstrong then wrote down a memo about how he would need to call the janitor later.

"Alright, today's lesson is over. I expect you all to respect the rules and follow them." Armstrong then closed the door. Once he was gone, Sam then stood up. "Like that's ever going to happen. What a load of-" And then Smash Mouth began to play.

[a-tale-never-told]

....

Y-you know what Chiaki? I-I feel the same way you do!.

Do you know how hard it is for me? To work about 10 to 15 hours at the nurse's office while also being ogled at by my peers and even my fellow workers?! Not only for my beauty and good looks but also because of my talent? It gets absolutely irritating and annoying most of the time!

I love my job so so dearly, but sometimes, I wish I'd had time to myself, you know? W-where I can hang out and talk to my friends, away from school and just.... be normal, you know?

Naw, I hear you, and I get what you're saying. Even though I super duper love my talent, and I'm hoping to make it big in the music world, I dunno, but I feel a bit jealous of other people as well. They get to be themselves, even if it is in the most weird of ways, while I'm supposed to be playing what society demands me to do? And abandon everything? My friends, my family, all of that just for a simple talent?

To hell with that! People should be allowed to make their own decisions in life, while also not giving up on what they pursue most! We're NOT slaves!!

Just as Chiaki said, you guys have more freedom and liberty than we do, and get to do more things aside from your talent. I wish I was a part of that life, a life where you don't have to spend the rest of your time and money pleasing people with your talent, and instead being carefree and enjoying the wonders of life! I want to go around the globe and experience the life of being a teenager, while also wanting to play what I want to play, and just... be free.

After all, isn't what that should be about?

......

[riverdamien]

The Odyssey!

"Sloughing Towards Galilee!"

May 9, 2024

The Feast of the Ascension!

The Odyssey!

Poet C. P. Cavafy (1863–1933) expressed this understanding most beautifully in his famous poem “Ithaca”:  

Ithaca has now given you the beautiful voyage.   Without her, you would never have taken the road.  With the great wisdom you have gained on your voyage,   with so much of your own experience now,   you must finally know what Ithaca really means. [1]  

National Mental Health Month!

During this "Mental Health Month" I am reflecting upon my journey. Raised in a small southern town we never heard the term "mental health", depression, too was never talked about, and seeing a psychiatrist. "O my god", you are crazy.

There were no therapists within 300 miles. When I was caught acting out sexually with a fellow adolescent at fifteen my pastor, a conservative man, brought my "sin" forth in a sermon, shaming me, and my mom took me to a shrink, of course, no one knew. And what did he do: gave me anti-depressants. All he said as he wrote the prescription was "masturbation is normal, just don't get caught."   And so the shame continued and continued for many years to come.

And so began my "Odyssey", where I sunk into "darkness", and depression, and suffered with it for years. Being called to ministry I played the game of being "straight", and my depression became worse, until I came "out", and my "odyssey" continued onto the streets of L.A., with a good therapist, and finally here in San Francisco, where I had a caring shrink for 15 years, who through therapy and meds, opened my life up to new fields of joy! And the "odyssey' continued!

Shame was always a large part of my life, largely from my religious upbringing, but the positive was I had encountered the living Christ and through experiencing his grace of freedom, knowing that he loved me no matter what, and called me to ministry was my salvation!

My former denomination within days after coming out removed me from my parish, tried to stick me into conversion therapy, and my many, many friends stopped speaking to me and turned their backs on me. Talk about shaming!

When I returned to ministry in a queer church what I found was they wanted to duplicate the straight church as far as they could, and thus began my process of decentralization. In so doing, they were inadvertently continuing the process of shaming. The biggest blessing I was given was being ordained a bishop (to get rid of me)  and forming the Society of Franciscan Workers, Inc.

And thus my "odyssey" continued into "coming home"! Respecting others wherever they stand! I view the Church, and on Ascension Day we are reminded of Christ "ascending" to his Father symbolically to become the head of the church. A church of love and grace. He became the Cosmic Christ, embracing all without judgment. My faith is in the Universal Christ, the One who is a part of all expressions of God, and in non-expressions, the One who is found in loving our neighbor as ourselves.

I was "spiritually" homesick for years, it was a dulling grief. It was not depression, so much as an uncomfortable unknowing that I was coming to the end of one thing and the beginning of the next. It was fearful and yet joyful.

For me this journey of mental health has been returning home to where God dwells, I'm no longer interested in making it a quick visit so I can run back to the world of "what other people think" and " what I can get done".

Today I simply "listen" to others, without judgment; I have no judgment on anyone, seeing all as children of the Divine.

Leaving the first half of my life was scary. Most of us have the first half of life hustle down. The thing is, I am just never, never homesick for the first half of life. . because it has never really been my true home!

========================

Fr. River Damien Sims, sfw, D.Min., D.S.T.

Post Office Box 642656

San Francisco, CA 94164

www.temenos.org

paypal.com

415-305-2124

Fr. River Sims, D.Min., D.S.T.

Director

Prayer of St. Brendan!

"Help me to journey beyond the familiar

and into the unknown.

Give me the faith to leave old ways and break fresh ground with You. Christ of the mysteries I trust in You to be stronger than each storm within me.

I will trust in the darkness and know that my times, even now, are in Your hands.

Tune my spirit to the music of heaven,

and somehow, make my obedience count for You"

------------------------------------------------

(Temenos and Fr. River seek to remain accessible to everyone. We do not endorse particular causes, political parties, or candidates, or take part in public controversies, whether religious, political or social--Our pastoral ministry is to everyone!

================================

[fuck-customers]

This is a long one, and a fuck customers, fuck coworkers, fuck managers, and fuck me aaaall wrapped into one hellish situation.

First week back at classes in college. I've worked for this place for a couple years now, and am now part of student management (assistant manager) at the university's food court. We have one really, constantly slammed unit that does burgers, wraps, salads, that sort of thing. And naturally in the middle of the lunch rush my fellow assistant manager, who decided she would just sit on her ass in the office giving orientations to new workers instead of spending some time on the floor like I do (and I constantly tell her to leave some to me but that doesn't seem to be happening), gives me a new student to train on REGISTERS for this super slammed unit. No matter how many times I show her all the buttons, she is in panic mode already seeing the line, so I'm also taking in that panic, I have a unit manager who won't go away and keeps giving me new information which I really needed to not be told at the moment in time. And the training on all the register options and combos is just patchy and sporadic and not covering the amount of material I wanted to because the line is getting so long.

While I'm getting that, I am preparing food orders, expiditing them to students who aren't listening for their number to be called no matter how loud I yell, while also constantly having to correct the student mistakes on the register because I haven't been able to actually pay enough attention to her, and then one of the full timers (not students, this is just their job) is talking over me to a student who's order I'm trying to prepare correctly and show the student how to ring up correctly at the same time. Asking him if he wants pesto and or extra pesto and shit. An order was missed somewhere along the way a few times. The full-timer didn't even need to be involved! She is doing wraps and salads! The dude wanted chicken tenders with buffalo sauce which is the grill side of things!

I try very hard to say "hey I need some space; there are four people talking at me" and she isn't listening and the student is getting freaked. So I finally had enough and told her "I need everyone (customer has moved on at this point down to wait for his food so not directed at him...i would never say that to a customer) to STOP talking" and frantically motioned with my hands for her to get away. I have a lot of problems processing repetative or constant noise and have had some uncontrollable outbursts when I was younger, resulting in broken belongings so I am trying so hard to regulate myself since it's been a long time since it was a problem but she Keeps. On. Talking at me. And NOW, she is saying I'm being rude and that it was so unnecessary. When literally the only thing that got her away from me was being rude! No one listens when I'm nice! They just assume I'm optional to listen to unless I'm an ass.

And really the new student was the victim in all this chaos. I feel like I failed her, and I DID fail her. She deserved better than I gave her today and I even sent out an email apologizing and asking how I can better support her in the future...but it's never going to erase what happened today.

And I am really normally great at my job. The chefs and other staff and managers usually get noticeably more at ease when I'm there, so today just has made me go to a really dark place knowing I was the total opposite today. And with my new managerial duties, i have yet to actually be trained or shown where to find documents, i dont have access to things like fuckin printers or online files, there are about 50 oddball half-formed docs and sheets floating around online that nobody actually ever shows me how to find, requiring about 50 tabs to be juggled with only about 10 minutes to find everything needed, there are no protocals or procedures or any sort of master list/sheet/file to help keep track of everything. And none of the other student managers will help me because they have so much on their plate already.

On top of all this, I have another job on weekends (that is also driving me up a wall), student teaching, four classes, and then this job. So I work 7 days a week, and the earliest I get home during the week is 11:30 p.m. (weekends is more like 6:30 p.m.) and the latest I get to sleep in is 7 a.m. But I so badly need the money. I'm really worried this is just how it's going to be and I'm just going to continue to get worse.

[prettyvampiress96]

The Malfoy Secret - Chapter 3

Since the traumatic death of her last living relative, Anna had since been a guest in the Malfoy manor . Although she was by now a little more than a guest. Her aunt was peacefully laid to rest and throughout the whole ordeal the Malfoys were her absolute anchor to reality. Anna however still couldn't put her thoughts in order at the situation. On one hand Anna had wanted to go home but on the other hand she rather enjoyed the company of the Malfoys. Anna had previously attempted to return home twice. The first time Anna had gone to return home , Draco begged her not to leave claiming he wanted to make the most of her company before his return to his last term of third year next week.. The second time Cissa began fretting about her wellbeing. Her being worried about Anna all alone in that big house. So Anna agreed to stay to ease Cissa's conscience but did say that she would return before her first day of work at the Ministry. What Anastasia didn't know was that she would be the right hand assistant to Lucius himself. The letter enclosing said information remained unopened in the Rosier mansion.

The following week Narcissa and Lucius bid Draco farewell at kings cross station whilst Anna was already in the Ministry of Magic for her first day along with another student from her year . Anastasia now knew that she would be working with Lucius , she was relieved at least it was someone who wouldn't judge her by her name. Though the thought of being in such a confined space with the white haired man had butterflies filling the pit of her stomach. Lucius strutted into his office in the department of Magical Law Enforcement, halting in his footsteps at the sight of his darling Anna stretching on the tips of her feet to reach a book higher up on the shelf, Lucius held back a laugh as he took in just how miniature she was even in a pair of heels. Even though he adored that about her , he couldn't help picture in absolutely nothing but those heels all stretched out for him and for cissa of course. Anna hadn't yet realised he had entered the room she was too caught up in finding the book Mr. Crouch had requested. Lucius took this as his moment . He walked as quietly as he could towards her . When Anna was in his reach, his large hands held her hips , his long fingers digging in slightly. Anna's back pressed flush against his broad chest. Leaning down to her ear. "You want my help with that darling ?" He whispered pressing himself further into the girl. Anna blushed at the feeling of his hardened member making itself known. Easily reaching for the book , his hand could reach without him even trying. "By all means you can say no and I shall just sit back and watch as that little skirt rides up more and more. Its taking I have not to throw you over my desk and worship you right here babygirl" Lucius smirked as Anastasia let out a squeak at the pet name he called her. Lucius brought the book down to Anna's eyesight, offering it out to her , Anna still pressed against the overly large shelf. Before Anna could respond in walked Narcissa. Narcissa drank in the scene in front of her , the sight of her husband and hopefully her soon to be princess. Anastasia's face flushed a deep red as she resisted the urge to run into Cissa's arms. " My darling how lovely of you to join us isn't that right princess?" Lucius turned to face cissa while slipping a wink to Anna. "I .. Uh..you...I should get this book to Mr. Crouch " she said shyly unsure of how to respond , after all neither of them had spoken since her and cissa kissed. Anna couldn't help wondering is Narcissa regretted it. Bowing her head Anna moved to rush from the room. "WAIT, STOP" Narcissa called after her smiling as annas feet immediately come to a halt." Hurry back darling there's something we should all talk about". Anna nodded in response quickly exiting the room. Anastasia walked with the book in her arms just down the hall, knocking respectively , Anna awaited permission before entering. " Mr Crouch I'm terribly sorry if I am interrupting I'm just bringing the book you requested from Mr Malfoy" Anastasia informed showing the book as if she needed the proof. "Ah right yes, good good I do believe you may have just missed crossing paths with our young Mr Weasley. He took it upon himself to retrieve that book . A good boy he is . If that is all Miss Rosier I am rather busy I'm afraid" Mr Crouch, the minister of Magic himself said without raising so much as his head. Anna walked back to Lucius's office , the sound of her heels clacking with every step, when suddenly body blocks her way. "You know you'd think the slimy Slytherin's would crawl back into their holes rather than working for the Ministry . Your father was a blind fool to follow the dark lord . Tell me what would daddy think of his daughter now. Oh no thats right he got himself killed before you could wipe the drool from your chin? " Percy Weasley sneered at her . Anastasia's blood fuelled an inferno of rage and Percy was about to get a taste of the fire. Passer's by began to stop and watch while office doors seemed to open for the fellow workers to do the same. Annas eyes glazed over and she smiled a

sweet smile. " Don't you ever speak of my family in that way do you hear me ? You want to know what my 'daddy' thinks , insult me again and you'll be finding out" Anna threatened in a low voice her wand drawn and pressed into the younger Weasleys throat. Lucius Malfoy was the first to intervene , his hand pushing anna's armed one down. He ushered the furious girl into the office and she slowly began following. " Enjoy freedom while you can I'm sure they've got a cell in Azkaban with your family's name on call it an heirloom. As cold, dark narcissistic murderers run in your family dont they. When you slip up Rosier and you will . I will be the one to put you there myself" Percy shouted at her back. Taken off guard Percy hadn't expected Anna to throw 'stupefy at him knocking him down the hall by a few good feet . " Funny that if I'm to go to Azkaban it'll be for killing you. You're a no good blood traitor and yet you think you actually have the audacity to think you stand a chance against me. I know spells your mother couldnt even dream of mastering . You think you can talk about my family when you know absolutely nothing . I'll escort myself to Azkaban right now once I've sent your cold body to your mother. That dark enough for you saint Percy? Anna fumed her wand raised . Arthur Weasley emerged from the crowd , his wand drawn protecting his son. Lucius drew his wand and stood directly in front of Anastasia.

"Princess go, back to the office head held high cissy is there and I'll be right behind you "Lucius whispers so low only Anastasia could hear it. Anna nods confirming she had indeed heard his words but she was reluctant to walk away. When Lucius firmly commands her once again to go as she reaches the offices, she can already feel the tears fill her eyes and the burning sensation in her chest. Anna just wanted to scream . Instead she shuts the door and walks to her desk with her head down. Realisation hitting her like a tonne of bricks Anna slides down the nearest wall. Narcissa immediately running to the sobbing girl sitting next to her , Cissa cradled anna against her chest, rocking slightly whilst rubbing a hand soothingly on the black haired girls back.

"I'm not a bad person I've followed every rule. I've never put a foot wrong yet I'm still painted with the same brush as my father am I destined to be alone. Perhaps Azkaban is the best place for someone with a name like mine". Lucius having now dealt with the pathetic Weasleys returns just as Anna sobs those words. Seeing her so broken and seeing his wife so affected at those words only tempted Lucius to go back and seriously damage the disrespectful boy. Weighing his options, nothing was more important than his family and as of that his girls needed him. Narcissa who was still holding Anna raised her head to look at her husband , she tilted her head to the side silently asking what had happened out there.

He ushered Narcissa over to him which she does hesitantly. Torn between leaving Anna and finding out what had occurred . Narcissa's curiosity got the best of her. "Anna I'll be right back darling" Narcissa whispered assuringly. Lucius explains in a hushed whisper briefly what happened. Narcissa can't believe what she's heard. How could someone say something so cruel about her baby girl. Lucius made his way over to Anna and bent down, lifting her chin up to face him. " Don't you ever let me hear say that about yourself . We would never allow you to be put in that wretched place. A name does not define you. That boy knows nothing. He is nothing. You are my everything. Our everything " he would say pulling cissa to him as she steps nearer not wanting to scare Anna . "I'm yours. Like both of you?" Anna questioned back , her green eyes wide and her pink lips pouted in slight confusion. " Why don't we all go back home a discuss this over a drink hmm?" Cissa hinted holding her hand out for her husband and Anna to take .

They arrive back at Malfoy Manor and Anna takes a seat on the sofa in the front room with Cissa sitting on one side of her and Lucius on the other side. Lucius gently takes one of Anna’s hands in his and with the other hand gently turns her head to face him “Anna I meant what I said earlier you are our everything and I want to discuss you becoming apart of our relationship” He nods at Cissa before continuing “There is no pressure Anna, you can say no and we’ll respect your decision. It won’t affect our working relationship either.” Anna doesn’t respond straight away, feeling a little shocked at his offer. “Should you agree to be with us boundaries would be set in place, which leads me to my next question. What are your boundaries Anna?” Lucius’ voice soft as he looks into her eyes.

“I don’t have any boundaries as I’ve never done this before” Anna answers honestly as she holds his gaze for a moment before looking down at her lap, a look of confusion washes over his face “Anna had never been kissed before I kissed her two weeks ago” Cissa explained. Lucius places his fingers under Anna’s chin lifting her head up “Just to confirm Anna, you are a virgin?” She nods at him and feels her cheeks heat in a light blush. “We’ll take things nice and slow; we’ll go at a pace that suits you…if you agree to be ours that is.” Lucius tells her with a smile on his lips and Anna couldn’t help herself, she looked down at his mouth and licked her lips. Cissa nods agreeing with her husband “We will look after you. You will be safe with us…always” Cissa took hold of Anna’s other hand in hers and begun rubbing small soothing circles on the back of her hand with her thumbs.

Anna looks between Cissa and Lucius before speaking “I’d like to be yours, both of yours but I’m worried I cannot offer you much in return” Cissa turns Anna’s head so she is looking at her “Just by agreeing to be with us is giving us more than you can imagine. All we want to do is to make you feel loved, safe and of course pleasure you beyond your wildest dreams” Cissa smiles and leans forward pressing her lips to Anna’s in a quick but sweet kiss.

“If we overstep a boundary or you start to feel uneasy or anything just tell us. In fact, to be sure we are all comfortable with this arrangement I recommend we use safe words” Lucius said softly, his breath warm against her ear “Safe words?” Anna asked shyly and he chuckled lightly “Ahh so innocent my sweet girl” His fingers brushing her hair aside as he placed a soft kiss to her neck before continuing “Each of us picks a word that once spoken the others know enough is enough. The moment the word is spoken everything stops…straight away, no questions or explanations needed” Anna turned her head slightly so she was looking at him over her shoulder “I’d like to be yours, both of yours” He smiled at her before capturing her lips with his.

Lucius and Narcissa both hand in hand with Anastasia began escorting her up the winding black marble case not stopping until they reached the door to the master bedroom. Both Malfoys stood watching Anna's reaction as Lucius twisted the handle of the door pushing it open , allowing Anna the first step inside. Anastasia was in awe at the decoration. With a flick of his wrist Lucius had set candles alight causing a rather romantic atmosphere. Anna's hand was still laced with Cissa's, she was reminded off that when Narcissa squeezed her hand. " What do you think babygirl?" Cissa asked brushing a loose strand of Anna's hair from her face, leaning in she placed a soft kiss on Anna's lips . "It's beautiful Cissy . It really is" Anna breathed looking behind her for Lucius. When Anastasia noticed him still stood by the door only now minus his dress shirt , she reached her hand towards him wanting to touch . Lucius noticed Anna's hesitation and stepped into her reach, taking her hands he placed them on the centre of his broad chest. Anna's hands ran up over his bare shoulders and linked around his neck attempting to pull him down to her level due to the height difference. Anna could feel his intoxicating scent overwhelm her and she took the plunge pressing her lips to his . His kiss was different to that of Cissa's it was rougher and more dominant . Lucius's hands reached over the curves of Anna's ass and lifted her up, her legs wrapping around his waist as he walked them to the bed . A naked Narcissa joined the pair , running her fingers up anna's bare legs causing anna gasp allowing Lucius access to her tongue . Anastasia pulled back from her make out session , glancing at Narcissa, her eyes tracing over the perky nipples of her breasts. Anna's mouth ran dry . She had no idea what she wanted but god that woman was it. " Remember Darling we can stop whenever you like , tonight is all about you my pretty babygirl , mommy and daddy will make you feel so good I promise princess you just have to trust us" Narcissa spoke softly tapping her finger on the top button of anna's shirt. " Can mummy take this off baby " Cissa cooed , anna nodded and proceeded to remove the shirt herself only for cissa to stop her. "Let mommy do it angel please" Cissa asked again this time Anna nodded and allowed cissa to removed her top. Narcissa dropped the shirt to the floor her eyes never looking away from Annas full breasts, leaning forward cissa placed a wet kiss to the tops of her breasts. Ana in response arched her back unaware that her hips had rocked against the very non discreet package in Lucius's trousers. Narcissa's hands travelled lower and lower until they reached the waistband of the very tight skirt Anna had on. Cissa's fingers hooked into the band but waited for permission from Anna . "Princess Mommy's waiting for you "Lucius whispered in Anna's ear. Anastasia nodded fervently glancing down and the sight of a naked Narcissa between her thighs . Anna couldnt peel her eyes away. In a split second her skirt and panties were removed , Anna's core now slick and bare to Cissa who licked her lips in delight at the prize in front of her . "We can stop if you want to little princess, you just have to say and we promise we wont be disappointed in the slightest or should mommy continue" Lucius reminded . " No please Don't stop please dont stop "Anna pleaded . Her pleas were music to their ears. Lucius interlocked his fingers with Anna's , watching over anna's shoulder as his wife's head leant even closer to Annas blazing sex. Narcissa hummed as she dragged a finger through Anna's wet folds, shivering at the breathless gasp she made in response. Narcissa placed a soft kiss to either side of Anastasias inner thigh before connecting her warm tongue to her wet pussy. Anna's hips rose from the emerald sheets , her head thrown back into the crook of Lucius's neck and her grip on his hands getting tighter. " Is mummy making you feel good baby girl ? Let us hear those beautiful noises of yours petal" Lucius teased in advance. Anna mewled , feeling

an unfamiliar weight in the pit of her stomach. Narcissa continued flicking the sensitive bud while she introduced a single finger into Anna's tight hole preparing to stretch her out for Lucius. Slowly and gently Cissa began thrusting that finger in and out in time with the flicking of the bud . With her fingers getting so slick from Anna's running juices , cissa added a second finger and with every thrust in began spreading them apart . Anna's walls began to clench around Cissa's fingers locking them in place and her thighs tightening pulling cissa closer than she was. " Oh Oh Oh " Anna screamed as she rode her first ever climax down on Narcissa .Anna felt shifting from behind her as Lucius moved himself from the bed taking Cissa's place between Anna's thighs. Climbing above her Cissa placed a kiss to Anna's lips. "You did so well darling mummy's so proud of you. Does Daddy want a taste do you think? " Narcissa beamed down at her baby all glistening in sweat , glancing to her husband smirking. Lucius's hand reached across grabbing cissa at the chin, passionately kissing his wife all the while tasting the sweet nectar of his princess on her tongue. At some point during the exchange Lucius had removed his remaining clothing. Lucius tapped on Anna's thighs grabbing her attention. Narcissa sat near Annas head now it was her turn to watch the faces her baby pulled whilst screaming from the pleasure she was receiving. " Princess you need to listen just for a minute okay? Are you sure this is what you want? I won't lie to you my girl it might be a little uncomfortable at first but that passes. Are you absolutely sure?" Lucius needed to make her aware he'd never forgive himself if he hurt her . " Please I trust you Daddy I'd like to try. Help me try" Anna begged her voice sounding like a whine. Lucius wrapped his hand around his painfully hard cock swiping the pre-cum from the swollen head to lubricate it slightly. The combination of that and Anna's cum should be just enough.

As he slowly began to ease into her, Anna's walls clenched around him as a pained groan leaves her throat. Digging her nails into his shoulders as she squeezes her eyes shut tight, Anna's body tenses against his when he comes to a stop. His body trembling as he fights the lust inside him to thrust into his pretty little princess .When the pain starts to subside Anastasia slowly moves her hips .

"Please " was all Anna could muster out. Lucius takes her thigh and places it on his hip as he starts to slowly move against her . Quickly finding a steady rhythm, as his hips roll against hers both moving in perfect harmony , Anna could feel every thrust against her walls. Her nails leave red half-moon crescents on biceps. Narcissa sat back observing couldnt help but reach down and began circling her own clit. His name falls from Anastasia's mouth like a prayer when he finds that specific spot inside of her . "Fuck, Princess , you feel so good around Daddy" he moans as he thrust faster into her , pleasure invaded her senses as her vision begins to cloud , with her head thrown back Anna can no longer keep the moans inside of her . An inferno rages inside of her , Her hands fall from his arms to grasp at the sheets with such a force her knuckles began turning white. "Papi, I'm..." she moans out. " Let it go baby I'm here Daddy's here" Lucius coaxed. Anastasias walls enclosed around Lucius's cock , her nectar coating his manhood. With a last thrust into her Lucius emptied his load filling his princess up to the brim. Gently removing himself from inside her , Lucius laid to the right of Anna enclosing her in his arms, Narcissa laid to the left of Anna . "Our princess did absolutely perfect wouldn't you say so dear?" Narcissa asked Lucius. "Oh i couldn't agree more darling. How are you feeling Princess?" Lucius asked Anna. The three of them an entanglement of limbs. Until Narcissa rose from the bed and into the large bathroom followed by the sound of running water. " Come on Darling let us clean you up and put you in something comfy before you fall asleep" Narcissa commented. Anna however was quite tired and comfy as she mumbled incoherent words from where she was. Lucius scooped her up into his arms and took her into the bathroom himself. Narcissa already in the bath, held her arms out as he lowered his princess down into her lap. A scent of lavender and camomile filled their senses. Lucius lathered up a sponge and glided it over every inch of Anastasias body. Anastasia snapped from her dazed state smiling at both Lucius and Narcissa. Before putting her head down and playing with her fingers , a sign they had already noticed when she was nervous or embarrassed. " Princess Is everything alright darling? Are you hurt or in pain?" Cissa asked concerned she may be hurt . " No no nothing like that I was urm well I just wondered could I stay with you two tonight?" Anna asked so quietly that if they had been any further away they wouldn't have caught it. "Of Course you sweet girl you were always going to sleep in with us . We wouldn't have it any other way. Now why dont you let mommy wash your hair whilst daddy gets out and fetches you something comfy eh?" Narcissa said softly to Anna pulling her in for a cuddle in the warm water. With the girls dressed in Narcissa's nightgowns , Lucius had made a mental note to have cissa and anna go shopping soon. Lucius had already pulled back the covers and slid in, waiting for his girls to come out. "Which side should I sleep?" Anna asked Narcissa. They hadn't discussed that yet. " Why dont you sleep in the middle darling so that way we can both hold you" Lucius offered. Anna scrambled into bed followed by Cissa. Cissa took hold of Annas hand and kissed the knuckles.

"I'm so happy you agreed to be ours our darling girl "Narcissa expressed. Lucius turned on his side facing Anna and Cissa draping his arm across the both of them in a protective manner. " I love you both my precious girls" Lucius said lovingly. The three slept in each others embrace for the rest of the night.

[abbatoirablaze]

Bunk Mates, Chapter 2

Word Count: 3k

Warnings:  sexual tension, messing with co-workers.

"Well that was quick," Tad chuckled, "I take it you two are a thing now?"

"We're talking," I said slowly as I bit my lip.  Tad smirked and my eyes went wide as I looked at him, "is that such a bad thing?"

"Kinda."

"Shorty."

"What, cap?" he asked, "we don't like B shifters to begin with, but Alex is seeing their captain now...isn't there something that should be said?"

"We're sorry for your loss," Jan Damme said, rolling his eyes, "you lost out on the chance to flirt with Alex because she's not single anymore?"

"Lopez is a dick," Shorty growled, suddenly seeming overly defensive, this has nothing to do with me and how I jokingly flirt with my work wife.”

"That's not your business," Tad said, trying to quiet him down, “Shor-“

"Why do you guys think he's a dick?" I asked, cutting Tad off.

"Well, he used to be part of C shift before he got promoted to B, when McConkey took over as chief. It used to me Tad here on C shift, Penisi on A shift, and McConkey on B shift. Aaron was always kind of shady," Jan Damme admitted, "he would purposefully try and make himself out to be the hero but would also always kind of set others up to fail."

"Not your place," Tad warned, “you need to stop talking.  Both of you.”

Damme held his hands up in defence and rolled his eyes, "it sort of is, cap. He was a dick to all of us; yourself included."

"Well, if you guys are going down that road, I'm going to do paperwork," Tad angrily said, heading off down the hall towards his office. I looked at my two other teammates, “I’m not going to talk down about fellow firefighters like that.”

"What was that about?"

"Hey gorgeous," Lopez said walking into the bay. He had a brown paper bag in his hands. Kissing me on the cheek, he handed it to me, "I hope you don't mind me showing up. I remembered you said you love home-made food, so I made some mac n cheese, and brought it down for you for some late night snacking. Oh, hey Damme. Shorty."

"Whatever," Shorty said rolling his eyes. He walked away leaving just Damme, Aaron, and I, “asshole.”

"Do you mind?" he asked.  Damme rolled his eyes and followed after Shorty.

"What was that about, Aaron?"

"They're just jealous that I got promoted over them when McConkey became chief."

"That's it?" "Yeah, of course," he said dismissively, "why?  Did they say something?"

"No…it’s just…they really seem mad over it," I lied, "you know, that seems like a lot of anger to be harboring over a promotion."

"They'll get over it eventually," He shrugged, "And anyways, I've been at the station longer than both of them. I was next one in line."

"Well could you maybe try getting along with them when you come over?" I asked softly, "You know, I work with them now, and I don't want any kind of friction."

"It'll be fine," he said, kissing my temple. He put an arm around me, and I sighed into his chest, "trust me. It'll work out...and anyways, if you really are that worried about friction just switch shifts with your brother. I'm sure chief would approve it."

"What?" I asked, "I wasn't say-"

"It's okay," he said, pulling me back towards him after I'd pulled away, "you don't need to explain it to me. I was just suggesting something in case you get worried for whatever reason that you can't trust them. B shift is great though. I'm sure you would love working with us."

"Aar-"

"Let's talk about that later," he said dismissively, cutting me off, "I just wanted to drop that off and tell you I hope you have a good shift."

"Thanks," I sighed. He kissed my temple again before making his way out the door, “have a good day Aaron.”

I wanted to be happy about it. Having a caring guy come in and drop off lunch. He seemed so supportive. But something seriously rubbed me the wrong way with how dismissive he was...and when he didn't want to talk about a subject, he would just cut me off as if what I had to say didn't matter.

"You alright there probie?"

"Just thinking."

"Well come on then," Jan Damme said, holding the door open a little wider, "let's talk about what's bugging you."

"Promise we can have hot chocolate?"

He smiled, giving me a paternal look, "Oh hell yeah. And all of the marshmallows too."

"JD, you're the best," I smiled, as I dropped the paper bag in the trash. I could see Shorty smiling as he saw me dispose of the 'snack' Aaron made, and we all made our way up the stairs.  I wrapped myself around Shorty’s middle and I felt him breath a sigh of relief, “don’t worry work hubby…I’m not sick of you enough to trade you in for a new model.”

"Well Boykins had to move the training certifications up after an incident this morning with councilwoman Price."

"That video was hilarious," Shorty laughed, “I can’t believe A shift though…”

I had to admit it was funny.

"It was," Jan Damme agreed, pouring all of us some coffee. Captain Tad put his toast down and looked at all of us, “the fact that someone was recording…wild.”

"Fucking A shift," shorty growled, “they can’t do anything right.”

"Hey, it's time and a half," Jan Damme said, wiggling his finger, "daddy's gonna get some sweet tannage time with that."

“More like you’re going to spend it all at the strip club.”

I shook my head at the guys and finished my breakfast as Captain Tad went over expectations.

"Who is Wolf Boykins?" I heard someone ask as we began to fill into the room.

"The worst firefighter ever," the guy beside him stated coldly, "he went through the academy with Terry and me. He's one of those guys who teaches because he can't do. His two kids are on B and C shift because Terry made a deal with him for Lucy."

"Oh you mean like a captain?" The rest of the crew began laughing as the A shift captain, Penisi shot him with a water gun, "hey man. Come on."

"I love this thing."

"Speaking of the other shifts?"

"Myawani," Chief said, tapping the plastic hat on top of his head, "quiet. C shift will be here, as well as B shift. Guys, take a seat."

"Chief there's another girl here!" Lucy exclaimed.

"Alex Boykins," I replied looking her in the eye, "been here a few weeks now."

"Oh my god, me too!" she happily replied.

"A Boykins. Hey, you're my bunkmate," the guy beside her smiled.

"I. Crystal?"

"That's me," he said excitedly, gesturing to himself. He pointed at his name tag, "I'M CRYSTAL. IKE CRYSTAL."

"You left your Chisled AF mag on the bunk last night. I put it on top of your tote."

"Thanks," he smiled, "but next time you can just put it in my tote. I don't mind."

"Alright, alright.  Enough fraternization," Chief said, interrupting the conversation, "grab some seats guys..."

"Ballbuster" Granny shot out at him, "Worse than Cap, Chief."

"Hey, you think the captain busts balls, he was relentless on Wolf."

"He deserved it." Penisi smiled.

"They always do, don't they Eddie?"

"Yes, they do!"

"You just remember," Chief reminded him, "he controls your certification. So, mind your manners and play nice."

"Maybe," he said cheekily. He turned around, "is your dad still a dick?"

"Yep," I smirked, “that’ll never change.”

"Honest and cute," he smirked back at me, "I knew I liked you Boykins."

"Keep it in your pants, Penisi."

"Wait?" Myawani asked, "Chief don't you have to get certified?"

"No," he said, hitting the top of the hat, "I'm a chief. Chiefs don't get certified. But Linda Price did give me my own pain in the ass assignment. I have to file a sensitivity compliance report tomorrow."

"We should start by getting softer toilet paper if I may."

I cocked my head at my bunk mate...how in the...is that really....

"YES!" Granny, the guy next to Penisi said, pointing his finger at Ike, "yes. I vote yes."

"That's not the sensitivity I was talking about," Chief said, as confused as I felt, "Now that we have female firefighters, I have to go down a checklist to make sure that we comply."

"I told you," Lucy said, "no special treatment."

"Regardless," Chief shrugged, "the place has to be suitable for women. We have to have adequate facilities. No longer can we use improper gender-specific language."

"Like what?"

"I made a list," he said, holding up a board, "things we are no longer allowed to say. From now on we are firefighters. Not firemen."

The guys started agreeing with him, stating that was fair.

"You can no longer call each other pussies, or douchebags," Chief said, pointing at the guys, “or anything referring to something a woman has or uses on her genitals.”

"I got called both those names, so I'm happy."

"The hose nozzle will no longer be called the knob."

"Aww man," Ike said putting a hand over his face and laughing, "I mean what are we gonna call it. It's the knob."

"When we charge the line, we no longer shout, 'Make the house round and hard,' okay?"

"Do they really do this?" I whispered to Tad.

"They do," he whispered to me, "jackasses."

"And the person sliding down the pole will no longer be polishing the pole."

"Can we even call it the pole?"

"Actually," Lucy said, picking up her coffee, "In the academy all the men were forced to call it the floor to floor conveyance device, right Boykins?"

I nodded, and the guys looked at her in shock.

"Seriously"

"Yeah, seriously," she nodded, "so no, you can't say pole, but I can."

"But we can still say the phrase periodically, right?"

"Andy," the girl began, "you cannot say periodically. Come on. I mean, dude, times have changed. Up in Olympia they have this Dalmation, named Spot. They had to change the name because that's super inappropriate to menstruating women. They renamed him, but he wouldn't respond to anything else...so they had to put him down."

"What?"

Lucy made the gesture of slitting a throat, and Andy took off the plastic hat.  The rest of the guys began looking at her, not fully believing the story, but Andy and Ike clearly did.

"So what?" Ike asked. You could hear the tears welling up in him, "so they put the dog down because of women's lib, or something?"

I knew it was a joke that McConkey started taking too far, but I felt bad seeing Ike in profile looking like he was gonna cry. Lucy had a smug grin across her face. I felt some anger welling up inside me.

"But you gotta get it, too."

"Yeah," he said sarcastically, "remind me never to go to Olympia. "

"Alright, enough of this," Chief said, ending Lucy's story, "I'm gonna post this list out in the break room. Add to it if you want. In the meantime, have a great training day, everybody. C Shift grab a power nap before Wolf gets here. B shift should be arriving shortly."

We all started heading out of the meeting room, and back to the bunks.

"Hey C, you babies gonna nappy nap before Wolfie gets here?"

"We're listening to the Chief, you jackass," Jan Damme growled at Andy, “you know, like you should do.”

"We're listening to the chief, Granny," Andy mocked, "'let's get in our onesies and nap."

The two men giggled to themselves, and I made my way over to the breakfast area, where Ike was. He looked upset as he started the machine, "you, uh. You okay?"

"How could they put a dog down because of that," he asked, shaking his head. He hadn't looked over to me, but I could tell by his posture he was visibly upset, “I just…that-that’s not right.”

"She's probably just messing with you," I said, shaking my head, "I'm sure they wouldn't put a dog down because of that."

"That's not what Lucy said."

"Hey," Lucy said, coming in the room, "so another girl, this is really cool."

"Can you tell Ike you were lying about the Dalmatian?"

She looked between Ike and myself then shook her head, "who said I was lying?"

Ike stared longingly at the coffee as it poured into the glass, "seriously? The guy is visibly upset and you're just gonna fuck with him?"

"Just admit it, Lucy." Captain Penisi said as he sat down at the table, "Ike she was lying. They didn't put the dog down."

He looked up, "they didn't?"

"No," she sighed, sitting next to Andy, "man you really took the fun out of that one, Boykins. You act like your dad much?"

"Almost as much as you are like yours, Chunk light," I said, rolling my eyes and walking past her. I made sure to shoulder check her as I passed for being a jerk.

"Wow, what a bitch."

"I don't know," I heard Captain Penisi laugh, "I kinda think that this is a Boykins I’d like to get behind.”

“The fact that she’s a Boykins doesn’t matter…you’d get behind anything, Cap."

The blaring noise caught our attention right as I slid into bed.

"EVERYONE UP!" Tad yelled. Still half awake, I was the first one to reach the pole. Tad, Shorty, and Jan Damme followed me. We were halfway in our gear when A shift burst in and started reaching for their own.  The alarm went off, and I heard the short whistles of my father.

"STOP, Stop. Stop." He said as he dropped the whistle from his mouth. He ignored us and went straight for A shift, "just with my naked eye I can spot seven things you guys did wrong before you even rolled out of the garage. So, it's gonna be a long day. Princess, your group did great. A few hiccups, here and there...Davey wouldn't have made those errors, but you'll get there. You guys went straight for your gear, before heading to the truck. Love the energy in this group."

"Everybody," Penisi said with a forced smile, "this is Wolf Boykins."

"Wolf Boykins," he said over top of Penisi, putting his hands together, "your certification trainer. Captain long time. No Peni-see."

"Good one," he lied, “yeah…never heard that before.”

Lucy chuckled.

"This," he said, tapping Andy's hat, "I love it. Not regulation. Lose it."

"HEY!"

"HEY," dad said as he copied Chief McConkey, “Chief Terry McConkey.”

"Wolf Boykins, how the hell are ya?" he smiled, "we're excited to have you. As a matter of fact, the captain was just telling me how excited he was to have you...tell him."

"I said that," Penisi replied, "I said I'm really excited to see Wolf today."

"Well, that's great," he smiled, "Because word on the street is that you guys are a bunch of hosers...of little kids and one very unlucky councilwoman. And I'm here because you. Guys. Are. Slop. Py. But I'm the napkin, okay? So welcome to the wolves den."

And right as he howled, B Team walked in. Davey grinned and began howling with my dad.

"Alright," Dad smiled, feeling energized. He patted Dave on the back, "alright why don't we all do it just to start the session off right, huh? On three. One, two, three."

Awkwardly a few people here and there begin howling slightly off from when he did. I put my head in my hands as Dave excitedly went along with it.

"I promise," he said, clapping Dave's back, "like me and my son, it's fun. See. It's not gonna be weird if everyone does it. Alex join in."

"I'll pass."

C shift laughed as A and B started awkwardly howling along with him.

"Oh my god," I muttered, feeling more and more embarrassed by the second, “Can the ground swallow me whole now?”

"Alright C Shift, since you guys are coming off a shift, I'll certify you first. Take off your gear," dad said, "A shift, study up. B shift, let me fill you in on what you missed."

"Hey, uh," Ike said, I was unzipping my jacket, but I stopped, looking over at him, "thanks for earlier..."

"Of course."

"If you don't mind me saying," he smiled, "I'm glad we're bunk mates. You're really nice. I was worried that you'd be a dick like the other guys on C shift."

"I'm glad we're bunk mates too Ike," I replied. I took my jacket off, and he held it for me, while I took off my suspenders, and unzipped my pants. He blushed slightly as I stepped out of everything. I couldn't help but notice his muscles flex as I took my jacket back and set it down just like the other guys had. The first test was going to be getting into our gear, “you seem really sweet too.”

"Hey, uhm, can I ask something?"

"Yeah, you can ask me anything, Crystal," I replied. He blushed a little more, and I could see his eyes trail down to my cleavage, "Ike?"

"Yeah I uh-"

"Hey, back away from Boykins, A shift," Tad said menacingly, “drop her gear.”

I laughed as the two of them had a machismo moment. I put a hand on Tad's shoulder, and one on Ike's pec. I felt a spark as I touched him, but I forced myself to look at Tad, "it's fine. He's just being nice, Cap."

Tad looked between Ike and I, then nodded his head towards the door, "catch up to your shift, Crystal...we have to get certified."

"Thanks," he said, glaring at Tad. Then he looked at me, "good luck, Boykins."

"You too Crystal." I smiled.

"Got a thing for your bunk mate?" Shorty asked, "thought you and Lopez were still a thing?"

I laughed, waving him off, "not at all."

"I mean come on," Jan Damme said, nudging me, "you mean to tell me if that firestarter asked you out, you would say no?"

I laughed and jokingly pushed him as he fanned himself.

"39 seconds," dad said, breaking up the conversation, "that's all you will have to get on your gear, and be zippered up." 

Chapter 3

[thatesqcrush]

Voire Dire

Rafael Barba x Reader. Warnings: implied fem masturbation, slightly dub-con at the end (kissing) but reader is very enthusiastic. WC: 3,339

It was an ordinary morning on an ordinary day. It was early and the eighth floor was just beginning to fill up. You had already been in the office for well over two hours, working on a motion and you were already running against the clock. As people milled about, settling in, you grabbed your noise canceling headphones and slipped them on over your ears. 

You frowned when you realized your coffee cup was empty. You were in need for more coffee but did not have the time for it. As you let out an irritated sigh, you noticed the head of the junior ADA department, Sonny Carisi, stride in. As he passed by your desk, a brown paper bag plopped onto the desk. You slipped off your headphones and swiveled around.

“And what is this, Dominick?” You teased, as you reached into the bag.

“Bear-claw. Coffee - light and sweet.” Sonny called out as he settled into his office.

“God bless ya’ Sonny. You answered my prayers.” You called out, before blowing on the cup. It was so hot, steam rose from the small opening and the heat pricked your fingers. “How did you know?”

“A little birdie named Marjorie.” He replied. He stuck his head out the door. “She told me you were coming in early and if I recall anything from our Fordham days, it’s that you always forget to take care of yourself when you’re under the wire.”

You gave him a pointed look, which then softened into a smile. “Thank you, Sonny. Much appreciated. And when you win that Mickey Davis case, I am going to take you out for a celebratory drink.”

“Don’t start, we don’t even know what will happen. He may plead out.” Sonny replied. “I gotta go - meeting with the boss actually on this. Get back to work.”

“Yes sir!” You mocked saluted, before swiveling back to your computer. Time was ticking after all. 

**

The rest of the morning seemed to pass in a blur. Again, nothing extraordinary happened. And as you electronically filed your motion, you spun around in your seat, with your arms in the air, in silent victory. 

As you faced your desk, you saw Sonny walking back down to his office with a very handsome, distinguished looking man behind him. It was clear the two of them were having some kind of heated discussion. And you couldn’t care less. Because the man he was with, was the most handsome man you had ever laid eyes on. He wore dark jeans and blue and pink checkered shirt with a dark grey peacoat. His hair was perfectly coiffed, nary a hair out of place. And he had a meticulously groomed beard. His hair and his beard were dark, with salt and pepper flicked through. You had a sudden urge to tug on his beard and you wondered what it would feel like against your skin, as you slid your tongue into his. 

The man sauntered past your desk and you looked up, feeling a flutter shoot through you as your eyes met. You caught a whiff of the cologne he wore - faint whiffs of vetiver and bergamot - and you closed your eyes, enjoying the olfactory overload. You so badly wanted to turn around, but you could not. So you settled for leaning to the side in an attempt to eavesdrop.

“You know who that is, right?” You jumped in your seat slightly and looked up at Marjorie, your co-worker, and fellow ADA.

“No. But he is nice to the eyes.” You smirked. 

“That’s Rafael Barba.” Marjorie hissed. 

You sat up straight. “That’s him? The Rafael Barba?” You scanned the office and sure enough, people were whispering and talking to each other as they looked behind you. 

You couldn’t hear everything, but you could glean whatever they were talking about was not regular old shop talk. 

You heard something about a ‘nice view’ and ‘had to move the Xerox machine and four filing cabinets just to get the desk in,’ and you snorted. 

“Yeah, the one who k-worded a baby,” Marjorie continued, as she sat on the corner of your desk. She ripped off a remnant of your long-forgotten bear claw and popped it in her mouth. 

“He did not k-word a baby.” It was now your turn to hiss. “That baby was already dead. He… expedited its passing.”

“Well, regardless. No one has seen him since then. Last I heard he was working with The Innocence Project,” Marjorie replied, plucking another piece of the bear-claw.

The door swung open, Rafael turning to face Sonny. “I'm going for straight-up not guilty.” Rafael stormed past you, once more, a breeze blowing by as he did so - and with it, his cologne wafted once more and you felt the back of your neck prick. Arousal shot through you, starting between your thighs, but rising to make your breath hitch. 

Marjorie hopped off your desk and dashed into Sonny’s office. You stood to do so, as Rafael as he stalked by. Your eyes met once more.

“Good morning,” Rafael acknowledged curtly. You felt your cheeks burn and you gave him a small smile, before following Marjorie.

**

Lunch had rolled around. You rapped on Sonny’s door. “Hey - want to grab lunch with Marj and I?”

“Nah, can’t. Barba’s taking the Mickey Davis case on and I need to prep,” Sonny replied. He sighed before dropping his head into his hands, groaning.

You shut the door quickly behind you and moved to lower the blinds in his office. “Hey - talk to me. Barba was your mentor, right?”

Sonny looked up at you and nodded. “Yeah, he was. He was the best ADA here - I mean, he took on cases others dodged. He taught me so much. And now… it’s like jedi master and padawan here.”

You grimaced. “Sonny, don’t sell yourself short. You are an excellent lawyer and you’ve got the chops. If anything, he should be the one who’s worried.” 

Sonny guffawed in response. “Don’t quit ya’ day job, Y/N.”

You crossed your arms and cocked your brow. “Come on, pizza. On me. Let’s go.”

Sonny rolled his eyes and nodded. “Okay, okay. But not Marco’s. That place is not real Italian.”

“Whatever, pizza snob.” You laughed as you both walked out. 

**

Time flew by. Sonny was at voire dire and you chewed on your thumbnail waiting for him to return. You decided to throw yourself into work in an attempt to keep your mind otherwise occupied. 

When Sonny did eventually return, he looked defeated and worn. He shuffled back into his office, his shoulders hunched over. You waited a good minute before knocking on his office. 

“How'd it go at voir dire?” You asked softly, as you knocked on his door. Sonny was chugging pepto-bismol and he grimaced as he turned to you. “It was the Rafael Barba show, charming and cherry-picking jurors for twelve straight hours.”

“Yeah, the office mill said he was a dog with a bone.” You shrugged, pulling a chair out and sitting.

Sonny laughed. “Yeah. Now get this - I'm looking at his witness list, and he tracked down AJ’s other foster kids, ACS employees, VA shrinks. How big of a staff does he have?”

You shrugged again. “I don’t know.”

Sonny gave you a look. “Dollars to donuts, I think it’s my old squad - Rollins, Liv, and Fin helping him out.”

“You don’t know that.” You interjected.

“It's fine. Barba was here before me. I know where their loyalties are,” Sonny replied. 

“When's opening statements?” 

“A day from tomorrow.” Sonny replied. “Which means I will be here all night prepping.”

“Do you want any help?” You asked. 

“It’s fine - it’s late. You should go home. If there’s something, I’ll let you know.” 

You nodded and bid him a good night, before heading home.

** 

At home, you climbed into bed and tried to watch a repeat of your favorite procedural show but could not focus. You spent the entire commute home, replaying the events of earlier in the week when Rafael came by. He smelled so wonderful and when his eyes locked on yours, your heart skipped in a way that it hadn’t in a long time. Picturing his eyes… his beard… you became warm and a ripple of arousal coursed through you, causing the ache between your legs to intensify. You had a drawer full of toys that you knew you would help, but sometimes, your own fingers were best – you knew you better than any other toy could. You slipped your fingers down your sleep shorts and under the waistband of your underwear. It didn’t take much – as you suspected it would not – and when you came, it was Rafael’s name that escaped from your lips. The ache lessened – and, for now, it was enough.

**

Time flew and before you knew it, the case was winding up - or so you heard through the grapevine. That office leaked like a sieve. Your phone buzzed loudly one morning. You groaned and looked at the clock - you still had twenty minutes of sleep left. Yawning, you sat up and rubbed your eyes awake.

[Marjorie: Come meet us at court - closing arguments on the Davis case and we are all going down to root for Sonny]

You quickly wrote back: who’s we?

[Marjorie: A few of us from 8th. Come on!]

You bit your bottom lip and then hit two little letters: ok. You quickly showered, threw on your pants and an oversized sweater. You grabbed a pair of wedges and made your way uptown.

**

The case was intense and heated. Emotions were rising. You fidgeted in your seat as Sonny faced off with Rafael. In the end, the jury deliberated in six hours and found Mickey Davis guilty. He was charged with manslaughter two.

Sonny caught up with the group from the eighth floor in the gallery who all congratulated him on his big win. You half-listened and half kept an eye on Rafael, who was busy gathering his paperwork. He looked handsome in his black bespoke suit, now cleanly shaven.  You frowned - the beard suited him. But it didn’t temper his handsomeness; with or without, it was as if he made your eyes burn. It also appeared to have turned him into a real-life Benjamin Button, so to speak. He appeared much younger than he did when he did that day in One Hogan Place.

Rafael turned again, and his eyes scanned the group in the back before his eyes settled on yours once more. You ducked your head, feeling embarrassed at having been caught and when you looked up at him, a smile had graced his face.

He began to head your way, tucking his briefcase under his arm. Your heart began to race and your palms were sweaty. You wracked your brain for a reason to leave but couldn’t come up with anything. And then Rafael was in front of you.

“Hi - you’re Carisi’s colleague?” Rafael asked as you were now afforded a close-up view. His eyes were the most intense seafoam green and you knew if allowed, you would drown in them. 

“Uh - yes. My name is Y/F/N Y/L/N. I am a junior ADA.” You tripped over your words, feeling your cheeks burn. What was it about this man that renders me into a bumbling fool? you thought.

“Rafael Barba.” Rafael extended his hand and you took it, shaking it.

“Pleasure.”

“No, that’s all mine.” His eyes crinkled and a small smile graced his face. You felt your cheeks burn once more.

Sonny turned away from the group and faced you and Rafael. “We’re going to Rudy’s for a beer. Want to come? The squad is going to come.”

Rafael opened his mouth and paused, looking over at you. Feeling put on the spot, you nodded, going along. “Sure - a beer would be great.” You then turned to look at Rafael. “Coming with?”

Rafael nodded - wanting nothing more than to spend time with you - this creature who had enchanted him. He had to admit, he had hoped to see you more - but in his head, that meant an impromptu visit to the DA’s office, where he wasn’t necessarily well received any longer. Or, it meant asking Carisi - and he didn’t want to be grilled by the former detective. You were young - younger than him of course, but he couldn’t imagine you were that much younger - and at the same time he did not want to seem like a cradle robbing perv. The group dispersed outside, braving the elements of New York City. It was biting cold - the coldest day of the year - and the wind whipped around something wicked. You rubbed your gloved hands together as you all headed to Rudy’s. You and Rafael hung back, following the group, but at the same time, both knowing the route, having made the trek many times prior. 

“So how long have you been with the DA’s office?” Rafael asked. Small, misty clouds emitted from your breaths as you chit-chatted. 

“Two years. I was originally in Brooklyn, but I requested a lateral move.” You replied. 

“That’s where I started too.” Rafael replied. A taxicab approached and Rafael waved his hand up and across from you, signaling to the car to slow down so that you two could cross. You didn’t miss how his hand cradled your back gently as you both crossed the street to the bar. Yout stomach flip-flopped in response.

**

The bar was empty, save for the group. Large colorful bulbs hung throughout, keeping in theme with the upcoming holiday. At the hightops, each table was outfitted with a miniature wreath with a candle in the middle. After a while, the squad from SVU also joined and everyone toasted Sonny on his victory. The corners of your lips twitched as Rafael said “To irony,” at Sonny’s response that they were just back where they started.

Rafael was engrossed in a conversation with Sonny’s former squad, and you watched him intently. You played with your napkin and wondered more about him and who he was. Sure, you had heard about the Householder case and how the prosecutor was acquitted - and sure, you had read some of his court briefs. But you had never thought in a million years that you would be so close to him. Many other former ADAs came to visit, but Rafael Barba never did. He had essentially dodged the office for years. You didn’t hear much of him, only in passing from Sonny while you were both in Fordham.

Hours went by, many drinks had been had. One by one, the group had dispersed, until it was just you, Sonny, Amanda, and Rafael. You all decided to move to a booth. You were slightly unsteady, having had too many glasses of wine and very little to eat. You knew in the morning you would be paying the price.

“Water for Y/N and fries for the table.” Amanda announced as she slid the food to the middle of the table, and the water towards you. 

You plucked a fry from the table and tried to focus on what Amanda was talking about. Sonny made a quip and everyone laughed. You used the opportunity to sneak another glance towards Rafael. His sleeves were rolled up, showing off his well defined forearms. A sole finger traced the rim of his lowball glass, which was half-full. Your eyes were drawn to the Rolex on his wrist and you noticed the time.

“Oh, it’s late - I should get going,” you remarked, as you pulled Rafael’s arm close to your face, looking at the time more closely. “Sorry,” you murmur, releasing his arm. You stand and wobble once more, and Rafael stands, catching you. 

“Good idea; it is late,” Rafael replied. “Let me just close out the tab.” Amanda and Sonny protested as they reached for their wallets and Rafael waved them off. 

“I can go home with you honey.” Amanda offered. 

You shook your head. “I’m fine.”

“Y/N, you know better than that; someone should go with you.” Sonny replied. “Amanda and I can.”

“Sonny you’re all the way uptown - I am all the way downtown. It’ll be fine.” You argued as you put your coat on.

Rafael returned, placing his wallet on the table momentarily. “What’s fine?”

“Me. Going home solo,” you replied. “But Amanda and Sonny think--”

“That you had too much to drink.” Sonny cut you off. “It’s not safe.”

“Sonny.” You pinched the bridge of your nose and you found yourself growing more impatient. “I am a big girl - I will send you a text when I get home.”

“Where’s home?” Rafael asked curiously. 

“Brooklyn.” Sonny and you replied at the same time.

“Sonny’s right - someone should take you home.” Rafael countered. 

“What if Barba takes you home?” Amanda asked, as she slipped her hat on. “Barba lives downtown - you don’t mind, do you counselor?”

“Not at all.” Rafael replied. “If that’s okay with Y/N.”

You sucked your bottom lip in. “Okay; Barba wins.”

“Great. Barba takes Y/N home and I’ll head up with Amanda,” Sonny declared.

**

The cab hadn’t even been going for ten minutes when Rafael found you asleep, resting your head on his shoulder. He didn’t want to move you - lest you lean on the glass and knock your head if the cab hit a pothole. He watched as the city blurred past him, a mix of lights and colors. You let out a small moan and snuggled closer to Rafael. Rafael threw his head back, resting against the headrest and let out a sigh.

The trip to Brooklyn was uneventful as there was little traffic and soon the cab pulled up outside the brownstone that was home to you. He nudged you softly, stirring you awake. 

“We’re at your place.” He murmured and you smiled sleepily at him.

“Walk me to my door?” You asked, stifling a small yawn. Rafael nodded and requested the cab to keep the meter running. You grabbed your keys to unlock the door and turned to face him. You thanked him for going out of his way to accompany you home and Rafael gave you a small nod, telling you it was no big deal - better to be safe. He licked his lips and you felt a rush of bravery course through you - you’d later realize that was the alcohol - and did what was, up until then, a figment of your imagination.

You curled your fingers into his hair, since he was sans beard, and pulled him in for a kiss. Rafael was initially taken aback, freezing in place, but then he deepened the kiss. You moaned into his mouth, which he took as an invitation to deepen the kiss and slide his tongue into your mouth.  His strong arms, closed around your back and pulled you tightly against him. You continued kissing for what seemed like eternity, but was only mere moments, when Rafael pulled away. 

“I’m sorry.” He blurted. “You’re drunk. You can’t consent. I should not have done that.” He took a step back, regret was etched on his face.

Your face burned with embarrassment. “It’s fine. I … should go. Good night, Rafael.” You mumbled before unlocking the door and darting inside, not bothering to look back. 

Rafael groaned, rubbing his hands with his face. It felt so wonderful to kiss you - but it was under all the wrong circumstances. He headed back to the cab and went home, replaying the kiss over and over in his mind, as if it were an endless loop. 

He knew what he had to do. 

Imagine your surprise when the following morning, when you headed into the office to put in some overtime, there was an email from one formerly disgraced ADA in your mailbox - asking you out for dinner.

You took a large drag of your coffee and then hit reply. 

TBC.

***

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[isimpoveryou]

hi guysss. pls pls pls if anyone of you are from indonesia or anywhere i just want to urge you to read this article. i know if your not indo you are probably confused but this arcticle is about 3 kids probably 10 or younger who got SA by their own father and the mother is trying to report everything about what happen to their kids but the police but the police doesnt even believed it. SO PLS PLS HELP THIS BLOW OUT EVERYWHERE

english translation:

WARNING: This article contains explicit content that can trigger emotional and mental stress for readers. We recommend that you do not continue reading it. We recommend that this article be read by the Indonesian police.

if you wrote it,” he said, “what would change?”

“We rely on the police. We reported it. So what? The perpetrator is still free.”

Lydia reported the rape of her three children, all of whom were under 10 years old. The alleged perpetrators are her ex-husband, their own biological father, a state civil servant who has a position in a regional government office.

The police investigated his complaint, but the process was strongly suspected of being fraught with manipulation and conflict of interest. Only two months since he made the complaint, the police have stopped the investigation.

Not only did she not get justice, Lydia was even accused of having a vengeful motive for reporting her ex-husband. He was also attacked as a person with a mental disorder. This attack was allegedly used to delegitimize his report and any evidence he collected alone to support his quest for justice.

Lydia isn't her real name. A single mother, after a divorce, her three children came with her. They live in East Luwu, a border district in South Sulawesi, a 12-hour drive from Makassar City.

Even though she is divorced, her ex-husband still wants to be involved in co-parenting. Her ex-husband is free to pick up his three children when they come home from school and give him pocket money or toys.

The situation seemed normal until Lydia realized the hidden truth: While helping her daughter take a bath, she found several bruises on her son's thigh.

The child reasoned, the bruises were due to falling while playing catch. Lydia advised them to be careful. However, not only bruises, but the behavior of the children changed drastically, preferring to be silent, often hitting them. Lazy to eat. Frequent dizziness and vomiting.

On one night in early October 2019, while Lydia was washing the dishes, her youngest child screamed that her sister was complaining of vaginal pain. Lydia immediately approached her eldest child, hugged her from behind while rubbing her shoulders.

"Son, what did you say earlier?" said Lydia.

"No, Mamak," replied the eldest son.

He coaxed, “I love you so much. Too bad. If there is a problem, tell Mamak. I became a helper and protector ta. Don't you dare to cook with Mamak?"

"Say, son. If a child is sick, Mamak doesn't know. Does it hurt, kid?"

The eldest was silent for a long time. Then cry without tears. Lydia was shocked, panicked. The eldest, in a low voice as if choking, said: "Mamak... my father na anu pepe' . " Mamak, daddy did something to my pussy, he said.

Lydia cried, leaning on the back of the sofa, “Don't play games, kid. Don't play around."

"Yes, Mama. Yes."

He asked his two children, "Is this true, son?"

"Yes, Mama. I also had my butt crushed,” said his son.

"Me too Mamak," replied the youngest child.

She grabbed her three children, crying together. His head seemed to explode, wanting to scream. While trying to get up to go to the bathroom, to let go of tears, he fell. His legs felt bone loss.

The kids helped him inching his way. He slid over to the sofa. He raved. And began to realize when his children scolded, "Why ki, Mamak?"

He slowly released his emotions. Then examined the children, found wounds in the vagina and anus. On the night that seemed to go by slowly and long, he looked at his son sleeping. Confusion. Fatigue. He couldn't sleep until morning.

In the second week of October 2019, with her three children, Lydia went to the office of the Integrated Service Center for Women and Children Empowerment, East Luwu Social Service. In this unit, ideally, a person who complains of a violent case can get protection.

The Head of the Service Center Division, Firawati, received Lydia in a small partitioned room. Meanwhile, her three children are in the game facility in the unit. Lydia told Firawati about the chronology of her child's confession to being sexually abused by her own father. Firawati admitted that she knew the alleged perpetrator because she was "a fellow state civil servant."

Instead of prioritizing a safe room for Lydia and her three children, Firawati instead contacted the alleged perpetrator, reporting that there was a complaint regarding an alleged molestation case, so Lydia's ex-husband came to the Service Center office.

Firawati argued that the reason for bringing the alleged perpetrators together with the three children was to prove whether they were traumatized when they met their father. Firawati also argued that her actions were with Lydia's permission. "Right, fellow ASN. I want confirmation," he said.

"Do you know? All the children hunt to their father. Instead, his mother was abandoned. Even the children find it difficult to leave their father when called by their mother," said Firawati.

Lydia, when I repeated the claim of Firawati's story, listened to it and gaped.

“How could he talk like that? The first day I reported and asked for assistance to the police, but Firawati immediately called the [suspected] perpetrator when I came with the children,” said Lydia.

“After he called, he told me that I was teaching the children to slander the [suspected] perpetrator.”

"If I ever meet Firawati again, I want to see how she lies."

Not only were Lydia and her three children in a vulnerable situation when the alleged perpetrator came to them, her ex-husband immediately lashed out at Lydia for teaching her three children to complain, babbling that Lydia was incompetent to take care of the future of her three children.

The complaint provided no protection for Lydia, instead she was cornered, sent home to wait for further news.

The next day, Lydia and her three children were asked to come back to Firawati's office. From this process, the three children were psychologically examined by an officer from Puspaga, an acronym for the Family Learning Center, a work unit at the Integrated Service Center for the Empowerment of Women and Children. It was later discovered that the officer did not qualify as a child psychologist.

The examination resulted in a claim that Lydia's three children "showed no signs of trauma" and said "the relationship with the parents is quite considerate and harmonious" and that they are "in good physical and mental condition."

Firawati's act of bringing the three children together with their father--to check whether they were traumatized or not--and reinforced by a psychological examination that Lydia's children did not show any signs of trauma was later used by the East Luwu police to stop the investigation.

Handling at Polres Luwu Timur: 'I was forced by the police to sign the BAP'

Hoping to be accompanied by officers from the Integrated Service Center for the Empowerment of Women and Children, Lydia was finally alone when she reported the alleged sexual abuse case to the East Luwu Police. (Firawati from the Service Center reasoned that at that time she was in a meeting with the regional parliament, while other assistants were preparing to move their office.)

The police received Lydia's report on October 9, 2019. A female police officer took her three children to a health center for a post-mortem, without any assistance. Then, the three were questioned by uniformed investigators, without being accompanied by Lydia, legal counsel, social workers or psychologists.

Lydia was asked to sign the examination report (BAP) but was forbidden to read it first.

Five days later, the East Luwu Police notified the progress of the investigation results, reported that the report had been received and would be investigated by Aipda Kasman.

Lydia went to the police station to ask about the results of the post-mortem for her three children. At the same time, he also gave her a pair of pink panties that had blood on them on her own initiative.

On Friday, October 18, the police reported the results of the post-mortem from the Puskesmas and according to one investigator claimed “nothing was found.” On the same day, Lydia was interrogated by investigators without being accompanied by legal counsel.

“I was only asked about everyday problems. Then, the investigator said it would be continued. He will fill in the other part because he will pray Friday,” he said.

“I was asked to sign at the bottom of the report. I said I would sign later after this was continued. However, the investigators forced me. And I signed. Because it's noon and I want to go home to make food for the children."

"Well, I think now, I'm so stupid why I signed," said Lydia.

The following week, the East Luwu Police informed the development of the case; that investigators have interrogated Lydia, the alleged rapist, and three of the victim's children; have medically examined three child victims along with the results of visum et repertum; and the next plan is that the three children will be examined medically and psychologically at the South Sulawesi Police's Medical and Health Division (Biddokkes) in Makassar.

Victim's Mother's Mental Health Condition Used to Delegitimize Rape Reports

On October 28, one of Lydia's children complained of rectal pain. Lydia photographed some of the wounds. And, again on her own initiative on November 1, Lydia brought one pair of underwear with green liquid and one leggings with blood on it to the East Luwu Police.

A day later, police investigators contacted him if there would be an examination at the South Sulawesi Regional Police Biddokkes on November 6. At that time Lydia received threats from her ex-husband, the alleged rapist. The threat was that the alleged perpetrator would stop the monthly income for their three children if Lydia continued the examination process to Makassar.

Lydia with her three children, accompanied by one of her siblings, went to Bhayangkara Hospital Makassar. Here Lydia and her three children are taken to the waiting room of the mental clinic. His brother who brought him was also checked.

Inside the examination room were two doctors, an investigator, and a staff member of the East Luwu Women and Children Empowerment Center for Integrated Services.

During the examination of her three children, Lydia recorded secretly through a cellphone camera. His eldest child was seen on the lap of a Service Center staff who was sitting on a sofa. There was an investigator, a woman and a doctor in the examination room. The doctor then asked Lydia to leave the room.

During the examination of Lydia and her brother, they were asked about the family's mental health condition. Her brother was asked about Lydia's psychological condition since childhood and when she got married, did any family members have a history of mental disorders? When it was Lydia's turn, two doctors asked if they had any “disorders” before divorcing their ex-husband, as well as the condition of their household. The interview with Lydia only lasted 15 minutes.

The results of this psychiatric examination were published on November 11. Lydia is said to have "systematic delusional symptoms that suggest persistent delusional disorder."

On November 15, a physical examination letter for the three children was issued by the Forensic Biddokkes team of the South Sulawesi Police, which stated that there were no abnormalities or signs of physical violence against Lydia's three children.

The East Luwu Police then issued a letter notifying the progress of the investigation results on December 19. This letter refers to the investigation process and the trial on December 4. The letter contains the police's decision to stop the investigation process dated December 10, 2019, without any details on the consideration of termination.

"So the time span for reporting and stopping the investigation is only 63 days. This is very fast and we think it makes no sense. Moreover, this is a case of sexual violence where the victim is a child, why is the process rushed?” said Rezky Pratiwi, Head of the Division of Women, Children and Disabilities of the Makassar Legal Aid Institute.

Go to Makassar City to Get More Competent Access to Justice

At the end of December 2019, Lydia drove her own car with her three children from East Luwu to Makassar City. The journey took him 12 hours. This long and windy journey brought Lydia to the Makassar City Integrated Service Center for the Empowerment of Women and Children, where she hoped that justice would be granted to the victims.

Different from the handling in East Luwu, Lydia was given a referral to report her case to LBH Makassar. From here, LBH Makassar, through the Coalition for Legal Aid Advocacy for Sexual Violence against Children, became its legal advisor when the case was terminated by the East Luwu Police.

The Makassar City Service Center also provides psychological assistance to Lydia's three children. In his psychological report, through observation and interview methods, the three children “were not traumatized but were anxious” and all three of them consistently told and strengthened each other's stories of being sexually abused by their fathers.

Their story of being sexually assaulted, possibly more than one suspect, is consistent with what one victim told her mother when the investigation was being handled by the East Luwu Police. The victim's story is reinforced in the photos and videos that Lydia keeps, which depicts the physical abuse of her three children.

The police at the East Luwu Police and the South Sulawesi Police ignored the stories and evidence.

"At the Makassar City Service Center, child psychologists who examine children believe that sexual violence has occurred," said Rezky Pratiwi from LBH Makassar.

Pratiwi said that the East Luwu Police investigation process was "procedurally flawed" from the first post-mortem to the taking of information for each child.

Children should be accompanied by their parents as well as legal assistants, social workers or other assistants as mandated in Law 11 of 2012 concerning the Juvenile Criminal Justice System, he said.

"So the East Luwu resort police are very unprofessional," he said.

“The police are instead focusing on [Lydia's] mother, who is said to have other motives. The victim's mother was examined by a psychiatrist whose procedure was not proper. Information on children was not investigated and other witnesses were not examined to find new clues. For example, information from neighbors or people who know them,” said Pratiwi.

Polda Sulsel Supports Investigation Stopped

On December 26, 2019, LBH Makassar together with Lydia visited the South Sulawesi Regional Police and asked for a special case to stop the investigation at the East Luwu Police. Attached to the letter were photographs of the wounds to the anus and vagina of the three children.

Furthermore, on 10 and 13 February 2020, the legal team sent a letter to file a case, but there was no response. On February 19, the Head of Public Relations of the South Sulawesi Police, Kombes Pol. Ibrahim Tompo, even told the media that they had "conducted an internal case" and that the termination of the investigation was legal and according to procedure.

Then, on March 5, the South Sulawesi Police team informed LBH Makassar that a special case would be held on March 6, at 13.00, at the Polda office.

The sudden news made the legal advisors completely unprepared.

"The time is very short for preparation," said Rezky Pratiwi from LBH Makassar. "The child psychologist who accompanied the victim from the start was unable to attend because of the clash of activities."

On April 14, the results of the case study stated that the South Sulawesi Regional Police recommended that the East Luwu Resort Police continue to stop the investigation process into the sexual abuse report.

Urge Police Headquarters to Continue Investigation

On the second floor of the East Luwu Police Office, connected by a ladder, there is a room where Aipda Kasman, the investigator who handles the case of Lydia's children, works. Kasman boasts of his work, “We have done a post-mortem to forensics. Until there are results from his mother's psychiatrist."

"Can I read the copy?" ask me.

"I can't convey that because that's what we're holding," he smirks.

The so-called psychiatrist's results from the Bhayangkara Makassar Hospital, which are kept secret, are apparently considered "truth" by many people in East Luwu. That his mother is "crazy", is not a case of alleged rape that people talk about and remember. "We know about the case, but it's her crazy mother," one resident told me. "That's why the case is not continued."

During the interview session with Kasman, the investigator immediately sat nervously when I handed him the tape. He wanted to speak more openly after being allowed by his superior, East Luwu Criminal Investigation Unit Head, Iptu Eli Kendek.

“If it is stated that we are maladministration or administrative defects, that is the perception of LBH Makassar. But we still adhere to professional principles. We act according to the rules, according to the law,” he started the excuse.

"We have also clarified to all institutions that LBH Makassar has written to," he claimed.

LBH Makassar has sent a letter of complaint to a number of institutions in July 2020, including the National Police Commissioner, the Ombudsman, the Head of the South Sulawesi Women's Empowerment and Child Protection Service, the Luwu Regent, the Director of General Crimes at the National Police Headquarters Criminal Investigation Unit, and Komnas Perempuan.

To these institutions, Kasman claims, the East Luwu Police have clarified and "everything is safe."

Komnas Perempuan, in a letter of recommendation sent to Police Headquarters, Polda Sulsel, and Polres Luwu Timur, dated 22 September 2020, instead asked to resume the investigation of the criminal case.

The process, Komnas Perempuan wrote, "must fully involve parents, legal counsel, and social assistance for victims, provide safe house facilities, counseling, and other special facilities for women." Next, "The police need to coordinate with the Makassar City Women's Empowerment and Child Protection Service to facilitate these special needs."

This recommendation was precisely what the East Luwu Police did not do when handling complaints about the molestation case against Lydia's three children.

According to Rezky Pratiwi from LBH Makassar, the police and the East Luwu Service Center took sides with the alleged perpetrator. “If there is a child's testimony, it should start from there. First, dig up the supporting evidence.”

"It looks very biased. In other cases of sexual violence that we assist, the police are usually silenced. If this is the case, an administrative termination will be made.”

On one cold morning ride, Lydia sped off. Past the bend, overtook some trucks. Since the incident of sexual violence against her children, she has left her future home and preparation for old age.

He wanted to sell the house because he wanted to burn the bad memories. His children didn't want to see the house. The children refused and cried when Lydia asked to visit the house.

Lydia, gave me access to watch several videos on her cellphone that showed traces of the alleged violence of the alleged rapist. Some of the footage shows the injuries on the bodies of the children which made it difficult for me to see them through.

A few weeks after the abuse, her children complained of pain. At a puskesmas in East Luwu, Lydia asked for a referral letter to take her children to a hospital.

In the letter of reference was written a diagnosis of internal thrombosed hemorrhoids + child abuse. Damage to the anus due to forced intercourse.

Other diagnoses of abdominal and pelvic pain. Damage to the vaginal organs due to rape.

The next diagnosis is vaginitis or inflammation of the vagina and constipation or difficult bowel movements.

At the referral hospital, the children demonstrated what their father did after the doctor asked what caused the injuries to the anus and vagina.

The initial diagnosis, photo documentation and video recordings, as well as the results of the examination to the hospital were ignored by East Luwu Police investigators. The police did not take these violent findings seriously.

"If the police post-mortem results say that there were no injuries and nothing happened," said Lydia, "why did the police refuse when I wanted to give this photo and video? They said just keep it, there's no need for that."

“Then how come my child's buttocks and vagina are injured until they are swollen white like white flesh?

“Why do my children cry in pain every time they want to urinate and defecate? Why do my children say their father is a bad person and don't want to see him again now?”

“If the perpetrator is indeed innocent, why doesn't he come looking for his son, asking for clarification from the children?

"If people say this is slander, why are the children slandering their father like that?"

“If that question is not answered, will the police help find the answer?

No, right.*

[holycatsandrabbits]

Tollense, an original serial romance by Dannye Chase, Chapter 4

A history professor falls in love with his best friend, a 3000-year-old vampire.

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Chapter 4

1997 (One year later)

The convention center had been beautiful under the blue Minnesota sky when Liam had arrived, and it was still beautiful now with its windows backed by heavy showers of falling snow that threw diffuse, moving light onto the walls inside the conference room. Beautiful and alarming.

Liam’s university was located in Florida. Florida was quite nice in January, and besides, there were theme parks. Didn’t people always like theme parks? But instead, the conference was being held in Minnesota, and this was the final day. In an hour, Liam and his colleagues, other faculty of the history department, were supposed to start the twenty-some-hour drive home.

“Could have been at Disney World,” Kurt remarked, startling Liam. Liam had been too busy watching the storm to realize Kurt had come up beside him.

“What on earth?” Liam asked, quite rightfully surprised, not by Kurt’s sudden unexpected presence, as he was used to that by now, but because Kurt was not a history professor, and therefore didn’t have a reason to be at the conference.

“Thought I’d drop in,” Kurt said. “See how things were going. Anyone interested in your research on Tollense?”

“Everyone. It’s very exciting.” Liam kept his voice low. “Am I talking to myself, or can everyone else see you?”

Kurt smiled at him. “I wouldn’t give you that kind of reputation. I’m visible.” Liam could see it was true, as Kurt’s good looks were attracting a few appreciative glances. “Are you ready to come home?” Kurt asked.

“Yes, we’re due to head out soon. Not that we’re really looking forward to it.”

“Well, your co-workers can head out whenever they like. I’m taking you home.”

“What?”

Kurt looked surprised by Liam’s surprise. “You’re from Florida. You have no idea what to do with snow. They’re pulling locals off the roads, Liam. I'm not letting you drive in this weather.”

“But you don’t even know how to dr— wait.” Liam felt a bit of a shiver crawl up his spine. “Oh, no. I’m not teleporting home.”

“I’ve been doing it for thousands of years. With humans. You know that. It’s perfectly safe.”

“No.”

Now a bit of hurt flashed over Kurt’s features, and like all his dark expressions, it was vaguely unsettling. “You don’t trust me?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I just don’t want to teleport.”

“Why on earth not?”

Liam hated to lie to Kurt. Partly, it was because Liam was not entirely sure that Kurt couldn’t somehow tell that he was lying. Kurt claimed that he couldn’t read minds, but he was a vampire who could teleport himself from Florida to Minnesota, and Liam would not have been at all surprised to find that Kurt was aware of the snowstorm confronting Liam without having checked the weather.

But it was also true that Kurt was Liam’s best friend and it seemed wrong to lie to him. Except Liam couldn’t tell him the truth about this, because that wasn’t going to help anyone. It was better if Kurt didn’t know that Liam was in love with him, that for over a year now, Liam had been obsessed with the memory of Kurt kissing him, slow and sweet, and that the last thing Liam needed now was for Kurt to pull him close and show off his impressive supernatural abilities in a rescue. Kurt had made it clear that he never allowed himself to fall in love with humans that he met, and Liam had to be protective of his heart, already cracked and in danger of breaking.

“Look, if you are so dead-set on it, you can use your mind-control powers to convince me,” Liam joked, and immediately realized that was worse than lying, because Kurt flinched.

“If I do that,” Kurt said, in what sounded like a carefully controlled voice, “I will lose you anyway.”

“Wh— you’re not going to lose me. I’ll get a hotel, then. Drive home later.”

“I don’t want you driving to a hotel!” Kurt looked exasperated. “Liam, you are the most adventurous person I know. Why not this?”

“Oh, I’m hardly—”

“Yes, you are. You’re like an explorer, always hungry for something new and unusual. You’re brave, and not terribly cautious, which is bad for your driving habits, but it’s perfectly safe when it comes to me, because I am never going to let anything happen to you.”

Kurt had stepped close, and Liam could tell how upset Kurt was because Kurt was losing his grip on the human appearance and mannerisms he tried to put on. Right now he looked sleek and strong and shadowy. He didn’t reach for Liam with his hands, but Liam could feel something surrounding him, like a faint cool mist. It felt oddly familiar, and Liam got the impression that the mist might actually always be there, a piece of Kurt holding onto him, and Liam had just never been consciously aware of it before.

And then everything suddenly snapped back into place: Kurt looked ordinary again, and Liam realized with a shock that a couple of his colleagues had approached them.

“What do you think?” asked one of them. “We’re talking about getting a hotel.”

“I have a ride home,” Liam said faintly. Everyone looked at him in surprise, including Kurt. Few of Liam’s fellow faculty had met Kurt, partly by Kurt’s design, because he wasn’t terribly social, and partly by Liam’s. Liam was aware that his very close friendship with a very handsome man was likely to give him a certain other reputation, one that was quite deserved (though sadly not much practiced), but not very wise in the current political climate.

Nothing for it now. “Chris Mullens, Doris Sullivan, this is my friend Kurt, ah, Smith. He was in town for something else and is heading back to Florida today. He offered me a ride.”

“Is it safe?” Doris asked, looking concerned.

“Kurt’s a very good driver. Got a— a car like a tank.”

Doris laid a hand on Liam’s shoulder, and to Liam’s surprise, Kurt seemed to bristle at that, almost literally, and the whole room seemed to go with him, the air around them feeling oddly sharp. Liam understood that Kurt was concerned that he’d change his mind and be convinced to travel with his colleagues, but it undoubtedly looked like something else from the outside— a sort of possessiveness.

“What a nice friend,” Chris said lightly, looking at Kurt in a way that Liam did not like at all, as if Kurt was not a person but a problem, not a good-looking man but a tempting trap. Liam’s personal belief was that men who were so vehemently opposed to homosexuality were probably terrified that they themselves might be vulnerable to such a “trap,” but it was better if that went unsaid.

Kurt rescued him, of course. “Yes, Liam and I have been friends for a while. I used to date one of his students, Martina.”

Chris’s face cleared a bit, losing some of its distaste. He had apparently not heard of bisexuality, or whatever word might describe Kurt. “Oh. Sure.”

“Ready to go?” Kurt asked Liam. He barely waited for an answer before steering Liam out of the room. They walked down an empty hallway where the storm winds were pushing hard enough to make the windows shift in their frames. Kurt spoke in a gentle voice. “Give it a few years. The world is becoming more tolerant again. Humans keep discovering their natures over and over.”

“This must all be very trite to you.”

“Not in the least.” Kurt’s eyes were sharp on him. “Do you think Chris is the one sending you those threatening letters?”

Liam scoffed. “He barely knows how to tie his shoes. Worse than even the typical history professor.”

Kurt looked unconvinced. “I’ll keep an eye on him all the same.” He held out a hand to Liam. “Let’s go home.”

Liam looked down at Kurt’s hand. A pale blue vein ran delicately along his wrist, and Liam wondered what flowed there, if anything. “What about my luggage?”

“I already picked it up from Dr. Sullivan’s car. It’s at your place.”

“You’re awfully confident that I’d say yes to this.”

Kurt sighed, exasperated. “I can’t believe you haven’t asked me sooner. I thought I’d be taking you to the Louvre every weekend. Or Rome. At least Antietam.”

Liam laughed. “I should have.”

Kurt smiled, looking at ease for the first time since he’d arrived. “You should.”

“Next weekend then.” Liam finally took Kurt’s hand, and their fingers fit together easily. As always, Kurt was slightly cool to the touch.

The convention center faded away into a sort of bland white light. Liam felt like he was floating, but still with his feet planted on the ground. He looked down and found his own office floor beneath his shoes.

“Stay still a moment,” Kurt warned. “People can get dizzy when they’re not used to it.” He dropped Liam’s grasp and put a steadying hand on his arm instead. And now was the moment Liam had dreaded: Kurt was so close, so strong, and so hauntingly strange.

“We must seem so very fragile to you,” Liam said.

“You are fragile.” There was a harsh coldness in Kurt’s voice.

“So how did you learn to do that? To teleport?”

Kurt shrugged. “Just always could.”

“Always?” Liam frowned. “I thought a vampire’s abilities were based on age.”

“They are.”

“But if you’ve been doing it as long as you can remember— since at least Tollense— doesn’t it follow then that your origins would have to be a great deal older than that?”

Kurt narrowed his eyes, considering.

“Or else,” Liam said, “maybe you’re not a vampire.”

“I drink blood.”

“A lot of creatures— uh, beings— are said to drink blood. I’m sorry, it must be so frustrating not to be able to remember.”

Kurt looked at him with a sort of gratitude, but then he turned away, toward the door. A second later, there was a knock, and Kurt finally let go of Liam’s arm.

It was one of Liam’s graduate students at the door, Jonah. “Hey,” he said. “Hope I’m not interrupting anything. Just have a couple of questions. I thought I heard you talking. Do you have company?”

Most of the students never met Kurt either, despite the fact that he was around quite a bit. Liam had learned by now that Kurt only appeared to those students he thought he might start a relationship with. Kurt had been alone since Martina had graduated, and Liam assumed it would only be a matter of time before he picked another student, someone to provide him with blood and share his bed. In between lovers, Kurt drank blood from animals, but he had told Liam that it was much better to have a human source. Kurt chose those people whom he thought would be open to the idea of a finite relationship with a vampire, those who wouldn’t be afraid of him but also wouldn’t want to stay with him indefinitely. Because Kurt never got attached.

“Let’s find out,” Liam said, and opened the door wider. His heart sank immediately when he saw that Jonah could see Kurt standing by the desk. Liam thought back for a moment to Kurt’s reaction when Doris put her hand on Liam’s arm. But Kurt wouldn’t get jealous, of course.

Liam definitely was.

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Updates Fridays on Ao3 and DannyeChase.com (rated E), and Tumblr (rated T)

Want to create fic, art, or other works based on this series? Please do! Just dm or tag me.

My previous serials are for Good Omens: Mr. Fell's Bookshop and Love's Endless Light

My Carrd

[txemrn]

The Picture Show

Book: TNA

Rating: fluffy; smidge of sensuality, smidge of angst

Word count: exactly 2000

A/N: Oof! I wanted to participate in wacky drabbles #102 this week, but long story short, the week got away from me, and I am painfully late in posting! That's okay, though! It's going up anyway, and I'm sure they won't mind me using their prompt (prompt will be in bold)! Huge thanks to @kat-tia801 for brainstorming this fic with me, and thank you to @chemist-ana for pre-reading (and convincing me it wasn't dumb lol). As always, these characters belong to our friends at Pixelberry (also, Caroline is the name I've given Sam's first wife; even though we know her real name now, old habits die hard... wow, pun not intended!).

***

A crisp, cool breeze manifests a gentle oasis for the gathered movie-goer crowd on the humid city street. Waiting in line to purchase tickets for their impromptu date night, Brynn casually ties a knot in the front of her knit band tee, exposing a thin strip of her Tuscany-sun-kissed skin. Finger-combing her almond waves, she tosses her careless strands into a perfectly teased bun to enjoy the reprieve from the stifling August heat.

“You’re making this too easy for me.” The familiar, smoky whisper sends a pleasure-filled jolt down Brynn’s spine as his breathy chuckles tickle her ear. His fingertips pad across her midriff, tucking his sizable hand into the front of her jeans. His other hand cups around her head as he presses his plump pout to the sensitive spots of her neck. “So, what’ll it be tonight: Melissa McCarthy telling jokes for two hours or scary paranormal demons?”

“The difference being?” Brynn jokes, pulling Sam’s hand out of her pants, lacing her fingers with his.

“Touché,” he chuckles, hiding a wide grin. Their lips meet together for a simple kiss just as the ticket booth attendant motions for them to approach. After collecting their tickets for the latest horror flick, the young couple approach the concession counter. “Wanna share a popcorn?”

Brynn’s eyes light up as she eagerly nods her head. “And gummy worms, please!”

“You are just as bad as the boys--”

“What does that mean?” Brynn jovially pinches Sam, aiming for his chest.

“Let’s just say that gummy worms were never on the weekly grocery list until you came around,” he smirks, raising an eyebrow while guarding his nipples.

“See? I improved your life in more ways than one,” Brynn quips.

Sam lets out a hearty laugh, pulling Brynn’s body closer to his. “Mmmm--” he kisses one side of her neck, “--so many--” he kisses the other side of her neck, his hand grazing the curve of her ass, “--different--” he suddenly squeezes hard, making Brynn yelp, “--ways--” he captures her lips in a hungry kiss.

A clearing of a throat abruptly interrupts the moment. “‘Scuse me, but did you want butter on your popcorn, sir?” Sam’s cheeks burn red as Brynn chuckles through a nod. “That’ll be twenty-eight eighty-one.”

Sam quickly double-takes as he pulls out his wallet. “I’m sorry,” he grins politely, “did you say almost thirty dollars? For popcorn and gummy worms?”

“And your wife wanted a large Coke Zero.”

Brynn smiles brightly as she dramatically slurps on a straw. “Yes, husband, your wife wanted a large Coke Zero,” she sardonically mimics the concession worker, batting her eyes innocently.

Sam lowers his voice. “For thirty dollars?”

“Actually for twenty-eight eighty-one,” the teenage attendant corrects.

“You’ll have to excuse him,” Brynn pats Sam’s chest, winking at him endearingly before turning her attention to the cashier. “He hasn’t been to the movies since de Blasio took office.”

The attendant gives a confused look. “Who?”

Brynn stifles a laugh. “Exactly.” She looks warmly up at Sam as he boops her on the nose, grinning smugly at her. She puts her hand in his hand that is holding his wallet. “I’ve got this, old man.”

“Absolutely not.” Sam pulls his hand away from hers. “What kind of gentleman do you take me for?”

“Sam, it’s not a big deal,” she reaches for his wallet. “You are always paying. Let me do this tonight. My treat.” He quickly snatches his wallet, lifting it above her head while shaking his head. “Samuel!” she titters, stretching to grab his wallet. “Why are you being so difficult? Put that away.”

“Brynn, c’mon, there are people waiting--”

“Exactly. Let me pay.” She pushes her petite body in front of Sam’s as she reaches for her own wallet. “Here, sir,” she motions to the cashier as she begins to pull out two twenty-dollar bills.

“No. Brynn!” Sam loops his arm in front of Brynn’s body, shielding her from pulling her money out. “Stop that!” He turns to the concession attendant. “Here, take my card--”

Brynn swats at Sam's hand, accidentally knocking his wallet out of his grasp, the contents of the billfold dumping out onto the counter. Brynn cups her mouth, laughing at an irritated Sam who is taking a large deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. She quickly hands her money to the attendant before turning her attention to Sam. “C’mon, let’s get this cleaned up--”

And suddenly, there it was, splayed out for both Sam and Brynn to see together: a picture of Sam’s late wife. In the nude.

Sam quickly snatches the picture up as well as his cards and cash, hoping Brynn didn't notice. When he looks back up, Brynn is already giving their tickets to the attendant to be admitted into the theater.

She noticed.

“Brynn--”

“I--I think I’m gonna need some more napkins,” she nervously interrupts, an out-of-breath pant to her voice.

“Ma’am? There are napkins inside," helpfully offered a worker.

“Oh,” Brynn appears defeated, refusing to look at Sam. “I’ll go grab our seats then,” she offers, power-walking away from her boyfriend.

“Brynn? Brynn?” His voice carries over the bustling hallway, but she doesn’t slow down. Once in the theater, Brynn anxiously stumbles in the low-lighting, picking out seats. Catching up to her, Sam’s hands kindly grip her shoulders. “Brynn. Please. Talk to me.”

She cordially smiles at him. “Talk about what?” She sits down, nervously pawing to open her bag of gummy worms.

Sam steals the bag of candy from Brynn. “Are you seriously going to pretend that didn’t just happen?”

“Pretend that what didn’t just happen--”

Putting his hands on his hips, he raises his voice. “You seeing my wife’s tits.” With the sudden cascade of snickers and gasps from fellow patrons turning to stare, Brynn grabs Sam’s arm, yanking him down into his seat.

Sam leans over, whispering into Brynn’s ear. “Please, let’s just talk about this--”

“There’s nothing to talk about, Sam,” her eyes stare intently at the large white screen.

“You’re mad.”

“I’m not mad.” Brynn begins wringing her hands as her foot nervously bounces. “I just,” she sighs before becoming quiet, her voice audibly shaking, “I--I didn’t know. I mean--damnit, Sam, you keep a photo of her in your wallet?”

“Of my wife?" He enunciates, making Brynn feel foolish. "Is that wrong of me?”

“No,” Brynn’s lower lip begins to tremble, “yes? I--I don’t know, Sam. I don’t know what I’m supposed to think right now. I figured you'd have a picture of her. Just with, uh, I mean. She would be, um--"

"Clothed?" Sam smirks.

Brynn gradually looks into Sam's eyes, but finds herself abruptly avoiding his gaze as questions flood her mind. Why would he be keeping a nude photo of his late wife? How often does he look at it? Is that even her business to know? To care?

The house lights turn down as the roar of advertisements brightly flood the screen. Brynn rests her chin in her hand, fighting tears. Even though the excitement of the music and vivid colors enthralls the audience, Brynn is a million miles away. She feels completely confused as to how to feel about this situation. Was she even allowed to be upset about this? Why couldn’t things just be simple for once in their relationship?

“Brynn?” Sam beckons for her from the clouds, bringing her back to reality. He lifts up the armrest between them. Wrapping an arm around her shoulders, he pulls her into his chest, peppering her hair with kisses.

As the movie ends, Sam and Brynn remain silent, making their exit to the streets of New York. After a few blocks, Sam stops, sensing Brynn’s heightened emotions. He can tell she’s still bothered by what happened before the movie.

He sighs heavily. “Let’s talk about it.”

Brynn lets go of his hand, scoffing, spinning around to see if anyone was watching. After a few moments of silence, she can feel the heat budding in her cheeks. She crosses her arms, and while staring at Sam, she lets out an inaudible ‘okay’.

With sincerity in his voice, Sam locks eyes with Brynn. "I honestly haven't looked at that picture in months. I completely forgot that I even had it. But--” he hesitates for a second, choosing his words wisely, “--throwing it away seems like the wrong thing to do."

"Caroline* and I didn't have sex until our wedding night." Brynn's eyebrows furrow before her eyes widen in shock. Sam continues. "She wanted to wait until marriage, especially given," he takes a deep breath, "my past--which you know about." Brynn nods. "But then the night before our wedding,” a smile blossoms across his face in remembrance, “she gifted me this wallet. With this picture. She said it was her promise to me--her all to me. I know you see a nude picture. But,” he sighs nervously as his eyes glaze with tears, “it’s always been so much more than that.”

Brynn considers his words, a warm smile growing on her face. She finally holds out her hand, for Sam to take. “Let’s go home.”

The next night, Brynn did bedtime alone with the boys. The penthouse had been fairly quiet throughout the day, even after Sam came home late from work. There is still an awkwardness in the air, and even though Brynn and Sam weren’t angry with each other, they also didn’t know what to say.

Closing the twin’s bedroom door, Brynn quietly tiptoes to the home office in her robe, knowing Sam is lost in his paperwork. She cautiously knocks on the door. After a few moments, the door whips open, Sam grabbing Brynn and jerking her inside.

“Since when do we knock on doors, babe?” Sam sits back into his leather tufted chair, pulling Brynn onto his lap, endearingly rubbing circles on her lower back.

“I--I wasn’t sure if you were busy, or--or if you--”

Sam holds his hand over her mouth, a smile growing across his face. “You know better.” He grabs her hand, kissing the back of it. “Now, what’s going on?”

Brynn coyly looks up at Sam, clearly nervous to ask her next question. “Can I see your wallet?”

Sam’s face falls, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “Why?”

“I want to see it.”

Sam can’t bring his attention to Brynn. He never removed that photo of his first wife, nor did he know how Brynn was currently feeling about the nude picture. All he does know is he better pull out his wallet. And start praying for mercy.

Brynn stands up, circling around Sam’s office chair. Sam reaches in his back pocket, pulling out the wallet. Brynn wraps her arms around his shoulders, brushing her nose against his ear. “Open it,” she commands with a sensual, husky tone.

Sam dutifully opens his wallet to the plastic picture holder. His cheeks begin to swelter with pink growing down his neck. He can feel a queasiness growing in his gut as he lays it out for Brynn to see.

“Aren’t you going to look?”

“Brynn?” He throws off her arms, becoming irritated. “What kind of game--?”

And that’s when he sees it: a picture of his stunning girlfriend, carefully photographed in the nude with her hands posing perfectly across her assets.

Sam’s eyes quickly dart around the room, finding Brynn locking the door and uncinching her robe. Letting the fabric pool on the floor, she straddles her naked body across his lap, his hands unable to resist.

Brynn grabs the wallet, pulling out the nude photos of herself and Sam’s first wife. “This may have been her promise to you, and you can keep it for as long as you want,” Brynn pulls out her photo, handing it to Sam. "But, this. This is my promise to you, Sam Dalton." She leans over, stealing his breath with a fervent kiss. “I love you.”

Cupping her cheek, Sam’s eyes gather tears as he looks admirably at his new forever. “I love you, too.”

***

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