#also apparently I have developed somewhat of a reputation

[the-starlight-papers]

The conservative student org at my school is having a very well known politician from my home state (which recently banned gender affirming healthcare for minors) come and give a talk about wokeness.

So you know I might just so happen to have been tearing down any of their fliers that I could find over the past few weeks. They have started adding more staples and pushpins but I cannot be deterred.

Now the hard part is going to be figuring out how to snag as many fliers from the people passing them out in order to make them run out faster.

[connan-l]

YOKAI: Since you hate men, please make me your shiki. Hey, Nanase.

TAKUMA: You're popular as usual. NANASE: For God's sake... They're all fooling around, just because Matoba isn't here. They may be imitating women, but they are all bothersome monsters.

—Volume 21, Special 17.

It's funny that sometimes I think saying Nanase is canonically a lesbian is reading too much into it given the only evidence we have is One scene that's just subtext and coding (and okay her wearing that suit, that's a very soft butch gay suit. And then there's her fascination for Reiko but I don't think that really counts, and that's mostly developed in the anime sadly), but then I reread that moment from Special 17 and I'm like. umm. Midorikawa what was the purpose of that scene if not to tell us she is Very Gay lmao

I just love the implication that apparently Nanase being a lesbian is such a widely known fact within the exorcist community that yokai literally take the appeareance of women to flirt with her. Like okay. Even Takuma coments that she's "popular as usual," which granted he's just teasing her about the yokai flirting with her here but still. What's your history Miss Nanase 😭 Do you think when she was young she was a ladykiller who went around seducing all the female exorcists so that's why she has that reputation lol

Also I'm kind of mad about how the official English translation did that specific scene:

YOKAI: We don't like men. Won't you please make me your servant? C'mon, Nanase.

Like. At least they still come off as flirting with her, and yes, the original Japanese can be a little ambiguous — but honestly that's pretty clear the yokai are not talking about themselves but that they're talking about Nanase.

YOKAI: 男は嫌いなんだよう だからさあ 式にしておくれぇ ねぇ七瀬

"Otoko wa kirai nandayou" make little sense to translate it as "WE don't like men"... They're clearly talking about Nanase disliking men here, especially within the scene's context given what Nanase says next? She basically states that those yokai took the appearance of women to "fool around [with her]," so what would be the point of doing this if not because Nanase "hate men"?

It pisses me off a little, like c'mon. I don't really think it was deliberate but that's still annoying because it does somewhat change the gay subtext. At least recently they still kept Shinobu's flirting with women intact so I hope that was still some unintentional mistake on their part but well.

I hope the new anime season adapt this scene properly too and that the sub/dub don't mess it up (the anime do tend to give Nanase a lot of screentime so I'm curious about how they'll adapt this tbh.)

[inconspicious-random-thoughts]

You know what I think would be interesting about Charlie and Alastor's dynamic? It would be in how they influence each other going forward. Alastor is slowly pushing Charlie to becoming a more assertive and inspirational princess as part of his plans to "pull all of the strings" and get out of his deal. Under his tutelage, Charlie will become much more willing to use her abilities in defense of the Hotel and her loved ones, potentially developing something of a ruthless streak as the threats to the Hotel continue to pile up. I also imagine she will start using his philosophy about using smiles to project power and confidence to hide her personal pain and growing trauma (which knowing this show will no doubt be a lot) to the point of becoming self-destructive and somewhat isolated from her inner circle, potentially even Vaggie to avoid weighing them down with her burdens (which would be ironic since it would be similar to how Vaggie hid her past as an Exorcist out of guilt and fear of her girlfriends rejection). Taking a level in badass in exchange for a drawn-out mental break down.

As for Charlie's influence on Alastor, Charlie's compassion is already rubbing off on him enough for the Overlord to risk his life fighting Adam and the Exorcists for them, something that he found so out of character that he had a villainous breakdown over this realization. While resistant to this growth of character at first in the name of preserving his dreaded reputation, Alastor will slowly becoming less withdrawn and more willing to engage with the crew even when doing so doesn't help his goals, even becoming less antagonistic towards Husk and Lucifer who in turn will actually enjoy his company to a degree. He will remain a ruthless bastard committed to his personal goals, and likely won't be redeeming himself anytime soon, but he'll still become a member of the family all the same. Whether this will resolve his existential crisis or drive him even more mad I can't say right now.

Good to hear from you again,

I been meaning to respond quicker but apparently I'm not allowed to sit and think for more then three minutes at a time. :( So my thoughts/ respond may seem disjointed as I was writing small bit at a time.

To be honestly, I haven't really consider Alastor influence on Charlie beside the standard of nudging her in the direction towards his own agenda. You are correct, now that it's pointed to me. He would have a great influence on her beyond the manipulation. TBH his manipulation might not as nefarious as we think (I still think it because of his contractor) but it can be just that he made to guide her to reach her full potential and power. Which would still align with his own goals with breaking his deal of his soul.

We already see Charlie being influence and episode 7 after they made their deal and Alastor told her about the power of a smile. She took that advice. When Vaggie was made aware of the deal, and Alastor suggestion of meeting his friend to gain numbers she agreed with "What was that about smiling?"

Charlie will become much more willing to use her abilities in defense of the Hotel and her loved ones, potentially developing something of a ruthless streak as the threats to the Hotel continue to pile up.

I wonder why she so hesitate to use her powers in the first place. Like, would she even need Alastor if she simply just use it to begin with? To fix her own hotel? There must be a reason for it. Its either, she cant control it as she doesnt practice it, or it effects her morals/personality, or just the general fear of innocents being caught in the crossfire. It could be all three. But her powers probably tie in more to option two as we only see her demonic powers come out when she upset/annoyed/angry.

Maybe why she so chipper is because as child she more likely threw a tantrum or possible from her teenage ansty emo phase lol...I hope because of her emo phase because emo goth Charlie is entertaining...and hurt so many people from it when her powers manifested in anger and lost control. After that, she swore to herself to always be chipper. So in a way she always used a smile as a mask. But after Alastor, she learn that she can do a lot more with a smile. If this is a backstory that happen, I can see her following Alastor guidance much more easily as she start to see that they may be similar in some ways.

Charlie will definitely become more confident with her powers in season two after the battle. We saw her stop Adam punch. We know she blames herself for everything. Sir Pentious death, Alastor being wounded when it comes to light, Dazzle death, Vaggie taking a bit of a beating from Lute to protect Charlie. She is stronger then all of them, but here they are or harmed as they attempt to protect her. She may take this as a lesson to just just suck up any reservation about using her power to prevent more of her friends from getting hurt when she could have easily stopped it before. I wouldn't say she become ruthless, or at least consciously. Alastor ruthless and wants to be. Charlie "ruthless" is she momentarily lost herself, overwhelmed by the influence of her power.

Charlie seeking Alastor mentorship over guidance from her father would be possibly Alstor has a great sense of self control and discipline then Lucifer. Lucifer would also be too gentle that it be too dismantling. Lucifer training is, swim wings, training wheels, or end up doing things for her to save her the trouble, while Alastor would be blunt and throw Charlie in headfirst to learn. You know Alastor the type that throws a kid in to learn to swim or push someone off a cliff to learn to fly. Everyone in the hotel, when giving advice or bring up issues, tip toes around charlie feelings about thing. Alastor doesn't. Alastor doesn't factor feelings into decisions. He does, calculate how people would react because of feelings, but the issues themselves he does factor them in. Which may be another reason why she would seek his advice.

I also imagine she will start using his philosophy about using smiles to project power and confidence to hide her personal pain and growing trauma (which knowing this show will no doubt be a lot) to the point of becoming self-destructive and somewhat isolated from her inner circle, potentially even Vaggie to avoid weighing them down with her burdens (which would be ironic since it would be similar to how Vaggie hid her past as an Exorcist out of guilt and fear of her girlfriends rejection).

There be definitely be something she'll hide from Vaggie, I just don't know what. Lack of ideas currently, I'll go with keeping Alastor injury a secret or he used their deal for something but has to keep quiet. Or Charlie undergoing demonic power training under Alastor guidance-which Vaggie would hate so much. Vaggie is super suspicious and frustrated by this. Vaggie feels like she failing Charlie somehow, but forcing herself to trust and give Charlie her space while trying to support her while keeping her in the dark.

As for Charlie's influence on Alastor, Charlie's compassion is already rubbing off on him enough for the Overlord to risk his life fighting Adam and the Exorcists for them, something that he found so out of character that he had a villainous breakdown over this realization. While resistant to this growth of character at first in the name of preserving his dreaded reputation, Alastor will slowly becoming less withdrawn and more willing to engage with the crew even when doing so doesn't help his goals, even becoming less antagonistic towards Husk and Lucifer who in turn will actually enjoy his company to a degree. He will remain a ruthless bastard committed to his personal goals, and likely won't be redeeming himself anytime soon, but he'll still become a member of the family all the same. Whether this will resolve his existential crisis or drive him even more mad I can't say right now.

I am so looking forward to whatever direction the creator will take Alastor. But I am hoping and looking forward of Alastor growing and eventually accepting the soft spot he has for the hotel and its people.

There's something I been thinking about a lot, it was the night before the battle when we witness Alastor and Niffty share a moment.

That was the real Alastor and his thoughts and feelings. His facade was dropped there. Think about it, With Rosie, we saw him relax and generally be happy. But he still had to put up a front, and a mask. He has to act like the overlord that he is. He had to be confident to ensure everything moves forwards as plan. So, as much as he less acting when he around Rosie, he still has halls and acting in some parts. But why would he need to put up a mask there with Niffty? He not going to confine to Niffty of all his plans and agenda, But he also didn't need to put up as much of an appearance in a near private, quiet moment, alone with Niffty, . What he spoke there was 100% honestly. He admitted he enjoying his time there and and like the idea of continuing it.

The other real moment he had was his break down. Grappling with the idea he nearly died. Even as mortals we know we can die any given moment, yet act invincible despite the facts. Now imagine, being immortal soul and a powerful one with near complete control....Dieing seem so improbable yet...here Alastor, freaking out that that near improbable thing nearly became true. Now on top of that, greatly injured and cane broke in two which will have consequences. All because of...he grew to care and want to protect the hotel (outside of a possible forced to by contract)

Alastor will slowly becoming less withdrawn

I think he will be more withdrawn and reclusive...at first anyways. He will want to hide his wound but also distance himself from developing more feelings for the hotel that nearly gave his life for. He be more cruel and ruthless to make up for growing soft, gain distance from the hotel as well make the radio demon feared again, especially if the video gets leaked. He going to be alone. Not willing or wanting anyone in.

The last 10minutes showed the little factions.

The vees.

Charlie and co/hotel including her father

Emily/Sera/Sir Pentious (Tho I think there be tension between Sera and Emily)

Lute and Lilith

Alastor was alone. (break down) But align himself with the hotel but hes not with the hotel. Its like when a group of adventures pick up someone because they are heading in the same direction. They will provide aid to each other but their missions are different. Alastor going to provide aid to the Hotel but he going to be too seclutive to appear that he needs any himself. Nor will he show or admit it unless he absolutely force too.

The thing is, being alone will end poorly for him. Just like how the battle went. The hotel fought together and more or less, made it out. Alastor fought alone with his pride and ego and he lost. lost badly.

So Alastor will be alone until he backed into a corner and just about to lose badly once more but Charlie and co will come to his aid. Quite possibly when he thought he possible burnt that bridge from something or betrayal that happen a little earlier.

That's when he accepts them that's beyond territorial and contract obligations. They saw him at his weaken and vulnerable and not took advantage of it. Despite everything. He'll finally learn to accept them because they already proven time and time again that they accepted and care for him. His walls will slowly start chipping away. Unfortunately he still hiding things so he can't full embrace the idea...but it a start.

He still going to be the Radio demon, generally being a prick and Alastor hiding behind a mask, but we get to witness Alastor slipping it off occasionally.

What would be fun is the idea of Charlie rubbing of Alastor, is that perhaps Alastor against his instincts and to his surprise....showed compassion. It be to Vox of all people. Shocking them both. Vox ending whatever Vees had plan that surely would not bode well for the hotel because of it. That Vox and Alastor end up having a truce and possible rekindle their old friendship.

Tho, I be laughing if Alastor showed compassion for once because Charlie got in his head, only for it to backfire terribly. Then Alastor grumbling that he was a fool to show mercy.

*Alastor limping away after killing the sinner who took advantage of Alastor showing mercy for once while clutching a gaping hole in chest. "It's important to show compassion she said," Alastor scoffs before poorly imitating Charlies voice. "It doesn't hurt to show some kindness!" Alastor laughs mirthlessly and winces from the sharp pain it caused. "Well, tell that to the gaping hole in my chest!!!!"

But in the case, Charlie did need to train her demonic power, I can see how Charlie end up influencing Alastor while he trying to mentor her. Not just the growing fondness hell have for her as his protege. But they probably end up having topics of discussions that arises as she trains. Alastor obviously mocks her point of views, but her words will sink into mind unconsciously. And those words will whisper at him, showing their disapproval at what depravity he trying to act out. Frustrating him that she getting to him

HE may even not go through the acts, not wanting to disappointed Charlie if she was to find out.

Or surprisingly more, maybe after training, Charlie able to control her powers outside of anger. We only see her demonic powers when shes mad. But Alastor witness, Charlie is noticeably stronger when she fighting for something she loves and care for. Which may leave a door open to a path for Alastor to consider to follow.

[dragonsdomain]

Blob Ghost Supreme chapter 4

AO3

Chapter 3

The colosseum was packed when it came time for the final battle. Eager ghosts were pressing in from all sides, forming a writhing dome of ghosts all trying to press towards the front. Walker's police ghosts had to be working overtime to maintain a shield around the arena to keep any ghosts from pressing too close.

Sam and Tucker probably would have had a very hard time seeing the fight if they hadn't been inexplicably invited into the fancy leader booth.

Tucker looked over at Sam with his eyebrows up high. What did she think about this? He was just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Sam shrugged. So she wasn't looking a gift horse in the mouth.

Tucker sneered at her for being a hoity-toity rich girl.

Sam sneered back at him for insinuating that this had anything to do with that, and really, shouldn't he just be being more grateful? Be polite, Tucker.

Tucker rolled his eyes. Fine.

Tucker turned to the tall clock man beside him. He was apparently the Observants' boss who he'd heard about. "So. Who're you rooting for?"

Sam snorted, covering her face, and Tucker raised an eyebrow at her. If she was going to be judging him for committing high society faux pas, the least she could do was telepathically tell him what he was doing wrong.

Clock man, ahem, Clockwork, laughed. "It would arouse a great deal of trouble if I were to claim anything other than impartiality. Though I can guess who you are rooting for."

Sam looked up again. "If I may, how did you know Tucker and I knew Phantom? We didn't even know back then."

Clockwork's eyes twinkled knowingly. "Time is irrelevant for me. I have forgotten more things than either of you have ever known."

Tucker grinned. "Is that really something to brag about, Grandpa?"

Sam choked down a laugh, which somewhat stifled the effects of her pointedly elbowing him. "Sorry about my friend. He doesn't mean any disrespect."

Clockwork shapeshifted into a young man. "No worries. It's refreshing."

Sam coughed awkwardly. "Do you know much about the other finalist? I'm afraid I haven't heard much about them." Sam neglected to mention that she and Tucker hadn't watched any matches which didn't have Danny in them.

"He's rather mysterious," Clockwork said, but there was a knowing twinkle in his eye. "He showed up through a portal the day before the tournament, and quickly established himself as one of the most brutal and promising competitors. His skills are quite impressive. I know many ghosts in the audience are rooting for him."

Sam rolled her eyes, muttering to herself. "Power this, skills that. Isn't trial by combat archaic?"

Clockwork laughed, and Sam blushed. Tucker smirked at her. "Many ghosts believe power is related to the depth of one's connection to the ghost zone," Clockwork explained. "Therefore, the ghosts with the most power will be the ones with the strongest connection to it. Usually, blob ghosts are known to take on a weak appearance because they're close to passing on. Those types of souls have little reason to develop any power or reputation. A lack of resolve."

Sam glanced out at the throngs of ghosts in the audience. "I guess that'd explain why people don't really want a blob ghost on the throne, because they'd expect him to leave them before long."

Clockwork nodded. "Yes, likely. Though there are also reasons they're sensitive about the matter. Ghosts care greatly about appearance and change theirs to match how they wish to present themselves."

Tucker frowned. "But we haven't seen any ghosts doing that." He glanced up. "No, wait! Skulker!"

Clockwork chuckled. "Usually it's accomplished through magic, not technology, so it'd be less noticeable. But yes."

Sam started out across the audience, eyebrows furrowed. "Wait, so... if what Skulker did was common... how many of the ghosts out there..." She whipped back towards Clockwork. "Is this common knowledge? Are you supposed to be telling us this?"

Clockwork waved her off. "I can tell anyone whatever I please. Now take a seat. The final round is about to begin."

Sam pulled back and plopped down into her seat.

Tucker leaned over to her and whispered. "What did you mean? I'm confused."

Sam shook her head. "I don't know. It's a long-shot. I'm probably wrong."

Tucker's eyes narrowed. "Isn't that what we thought about Phantom having something to do with Danny?"

Sam shushed him. "Not so loud! I don't know." She sighed. "I'm just wondering, I guess, how many of these ghosts are hiding something?"

"Something like..." Tucker prompted.

Sam frowned, then whispered in Tucker's ear.

He pulled away from her, wearing a baffled grin. "That is crazy. It'd be hilarious if you were right."

Sam shrugged. "Well I'm probably not. Now let's watch this battle. Let's hope Danny wins instead of this nasty-sounding other guy."

...

Danny clenched his jaw as the gate opened into the arena, and he and his opponent both floated out.

His opponent was large, but in a way that was far more solid than the tornado from the qualifying round. He was shaped like a muscular human, but his skin was blue like a corpse, and blue fire consumed his head in place of hair. His gaze rose from the ground, and locked with Danny's. It stabbed into him, the sharp, uncanny smile, the red eyes that looked so sickeningly familiar. Danny had some sense that he'd met this ghost before, that he hated him, that he was afraid of him.

"Welcome, denizens of the ghost zone, to the final battle of the Ghost King Tournament! Blob Ghost Phantom versus Dark Dan!"

Dan lunged. He was where Danny was in an instant, and his clawed hands whipped the air inches from his face.

Danny pulled back, zipping towards the opposite side of the arena again to get a little space to think, but after only another instant Dan was on him again, grabbing at the air he barely halted before. Danny put up a ghost shield to block Dan's claws and ecto-blasts, but Dan grabbed his shield with him in it and pounded it against the wall only three times before it shattered, leaving Danny breathless.

Danny slipped out of the way again just before Dan could grab him. He started darting erratically through the air to try to keep away from Dan, and it worked for a couple of seconds until an ectoblast hit him. It flung Danny against the wall, but he bounced off of it harmlessly.

Dan frowned when he saw that Danny was fine, and Danny rushed out of the way again. He finally managed to pivot and get a few shots in as he flew away, but Dan dodged two of them harmlessly and blocked the third with what looked like his bare hand. Danny gulped and continued trying to avoid Dan's shots. He needed a second to think.

Dan's fist hit him from the side, launching Danny into the wall. Danny bounced off of it and onto the floor, and he pulled up spitting sand out of his mouth.

"So that meager form did have one advantage after all, does it?" Dan said, cracking his knuckles. "Interesting."

What did he mean did? Danny was right here! Maybe Dan wasn't talking about him at all.

Danny fired off some shots of frost, but Dan broke through each one with relative ease. Danny continued his game of keep-away while he tried to charge up an especially powerful blast of ice, though when he managed to fire it off, Dan dodged out of its way. Danny gritted his teeth. How was he supposed to beat this ghost? This was so frustrating!

Danny started curling power around his space core, channeling its destructive force and creating another black hole.

Dan flew right up to the hole easily and extinguished it between his fingers with a condescending smirk. He blew away the smoke on them.

Danny froze. "What?!"

Dan smirked. "Oh, my pathetic, inferior self. Let me show you how it's done."

Dan brought his hands together and pulled them apart to create a black hole of his own. Danny's eyes widened as the circumference of the hole in turn grew larger and larger.

"What are you doing?" Danny screamed as he pushed himself against the wall as far from the ball as possible. "You'll destroy the arena!"

"If that's what it takes," Dan said casually.

Danny set his jaw in determination, then surged toward Dan's black hole like the other ghost had just a second ago. He opened his mouth wider than he ever thought was possible and swallowed the black thing whole.

Dan stared at him dubiously. Danny stared back, hoping his chest wasn't about to implode.

After a few seconds of them staring at each other and the audience staring at them, nothing had happened, and the ghosts in the stands let out a collective sigh of relief.

Danny opened his mouth to yell at Dan again, but the force of the black hole suddenly blasted forth out of it as a void-colored laser, directly in Dan's face. Danny tried to force his jaw shut; he wasn't trying to kill anyone, whatever this was, but it took several seconds before he was able to.

When the power finally depleted, Danny could see that the arena had finally met its match. A hole had been burned clean through it and the hall behind it, with the pale green of the ghost zone sky visible at the other end. Danny gulped. "Dan?"

There was silence for a second. Then a small, round shape pushed out of the wreckage at the end of the tunnel, steaming. Danny squinted. It looked like a large green water balloon. It looked like him.

Dan the blob ghost floated dazedly out of the tunnel, then flopped to the ground on the edge of the arena.

Danny blinked, looking around at the audience. That wasn't real, right?

Up in the fancy booth, the two familiar figures of Sam and Tucker stood up and started to applaud. No one else followed, the entire audience held in stunned silence.

The announcer Observant was frantically whispering to the other Observants beside him. Finally he spoke. "So, um. Yes, your eyes do not deceive you. Dark Dan was a blob ghost this entire time. How cowardly of him to hide it! Surely no one else would be able to relate to something so foolish—"

Clockwork took the microphone from the Observant's hand. "On the contrary, I think we can all learn from this. While some ghosts like Dan and Skulker may disguise their true self, it is the one who showed the truth despite its humility who ultimately won this tournament."

Clockwork swept his arms wide towards the audience. "For too long we've assumed that a ghost's appearance defines them. We have passed off blob ghosts as weak, to be ignored and forgotten. But as we've seen today, that belief does not hold water. It is an impression of a more ignorant time. In fact, perhaps a small appearance, rather than demonstrating any kind of weakness, shows confidence, and a strength more than any other."

Hushed murmuring trickled through the audience, ghosts looking at each other in doubt. Sam and Tucker had stopped clapping when Clockwork spoke, and now Sam was glancing around anxiously as Tucker attempted to give Danny an encouraging smile.

Johnny 13 jumped up onto the wall and pumped a fist in the air. "Hail King Phantom!" he screamed, then, with a pop, turned into a small, dark green blob ghost.

Several members of the crowd gasped.

Ember McLain hovered above the crowd and thrust her guitar into the air. "Hail King Phantom!" and she shapeshifted into a squishy blue fireball.

Danny's jaw dropped. Her too? How many of them were secretly blob ghosts?

One by one, each of Ember's bandmates also floated up and turned into blob ghosts of varying colors. Danny could only stare. The murmurings of the audience members had taken on a different tone, them turning to each other with looks on their faces not of shame or anger, but of awe.

A couple of ghosts started to filter away. What, were they blob ghosts too and didn't want to show it?

Those who remained, though, gradually started to also turn into blob ghosts. Danny recognized several he knew. The vine ghost from the first round shapeshifted into a roundish bramble. The tornado ghost turned into a more peaceful-looking sphere of wind. Technus abandoned an avatar he'd been hanging out in to reveal his own sparking blob ghost form.

Danny gaped as the silhouettes of the audience melded into the pleasant appearance of a ball park. Every one of them. "What?" he asked again, dumbly.

A blue blob ghost with a clock pinning a cloak around its neck floated down to him. "Clockwork?" Danny asked, extremely confused.

Clockwork nodded. "We're all blob ghosts. The archaic belief that that appearance was weak has been holding us back for centuries. By winning this tournament, you showed everyone here that they don't need to be ashamed of what they really look like."

"Wait, they all have shapeshifting magic? Does that mean I have shapeshifting magic too?! Teach me how to--"

Tucker crashed into Danny from behind, and Sam was quick to follow, the two pinning him in a hug.

"That was so awesome!" Sam shouted. "I was kind of worried you were about to lose, 'cause apparently he's your evil future self and everything, but you totally kicked his bu—!"

"Evil future self???" Danny spluttered.

"Oh, yeah. Clockwork told us." Tucker said.

Danny stared at him, then said hopefully, "I grow up to look that cool?"

Tucker shrugged. "I mean, I guess? Anyway, you're the ghost king! This is awesome! You're an inspiration!"

Danny looked up at the crowds of blob ghosts floating around each other joyfully. So everything they'd been saying about him had been because they were just ashamed themselves. And now they finally felt proud enough to take their true forms. They looked so comfortable, so happy.

Danny looked back at Clockwork. "Okay, but seriously. Show me how to shapeshift into something cooler!"

[kylesvariouslistsandstuff]

Sequel Scuttlebutt

Say it ain't so! ELEMENTAL 2 is apparently in the works! TOY STORY 5 is supposed to have Andy show up with his "new family"! Something... Something...

Yeah, um... I looked at the "sources", it's either some podcast with a lot of "I've heard" or a fansite with a very spotty track record. And there's been *plenty* of talk over the latter news, given how divisive TOY STORY 4 was.

How's about we wait for official word from the filmmakers, Disney, and/or Pixar themselves on what's happening? 'Kay? We're still less than a year away from the movie ELIO, and an INSIDE OUT sequel is right after that... Like... C'mon, this is not only quite early for a movie that currently does not have a release date, but also... It's not from the filmmakers themselves.

I'd imagine TOY STORY 5 should be out in about a few years from now. When Disney bought Pixar in 2006, and Pixar finally began production on their TOY STORY 3 - and not some Pixar-less concoction that had been in development prior to that, they announced it right off the bat. And the movie, at first, was set for 2009. It ended up being released in 2010, four years after the initial announcement.

TOY STORY 4 was officially unveiled during a Disney earnings call in fall 2014, with a summer 2017 release date. Overtime, it went back a year, and then another year... So that's about 4 1/2 years out from release.

TOY STORY 5's existence was revealed to us mere months ago. It may come out in 2026, or 2027, maybe even a little later. It's probably deep in development as I type. Again... I'll just wait for its director/writer/whathaveyou, or a studio press release or some announcement from a reputable trade.

ELEMENTAL 2... Yeah, I mean, it *could* happen? Originally, that movie's ending was to have a time-skip, and it ended up getting axed. It's been hinted that the sequel could lengthen what was to be a minute or so long, or something else. The movie is currently up to $478m at the worldwide box office, over 2.3x its $200m budget. $500m would be the classic 2 1/2x breakeven point, but both Disney and Pixar heads seem quite happy with how the movie did regardless of overall total. They're wisely thinking of its legs and good scores. It's a real pick-me-up from how LIGHTYEAR did last year, and in terms of animation all-around, Disney Animation's STRANGE WORLD's disastrous run.

So, yeah, it could get a sequel... But I'll wait till word from the source.

It'd be rather quick, too. Pixar sequels tend to be announced a little while after the first/previous movie debuts. With the exception of TOY STORY 2, and first sequels to movies made before the merger, they tend to wait that out.

CARS came out in June 2006, the sequel was announced in April 2008.

CARS 3 was officially announced in March 2014, nearly three years after CARS 2 came out. Michael Wallis, the voice of the Sheriff in those movies, did let that slip a little while beforehand whether he was supposed to or not. That was in, approx., August 2013.

Again, TOY STORY 4 was announced in October 2014. This was four years after the release of TOY STORY 3.

INSIDE OUT came out in June 2015, the sequel was announced this past September, some seven years after the first one came out.

I'll throw in LIGHTYEAR as well, given that it's TOY STORY-adjacent. TOY STORY 4 came out in June 2019, LIGHTYEAR was announced in December 2020. Over a year and a half later.

So if an ELEMENTAL 2 (ELEMENTWO?) is indeed in the cards, I'd imagine they wouldn't announce it this fast. Maybe in a few years from now.

It'd be interesting to see that movie be the first of the Docter-era movies to get a sequel, after all, it is their first somewhat-financial success in a long while - in the old-school pre-COVID sense.

The movie was greenlit before Pete Docter became Pixar's CCO, but it went full steam ahead after the previous leader's ousting.

It's hard to gauge with the other titles. ONWARD didn't fare too well even before it was cut off by the pandemic, SOUL isn't really a sequelizable movie, LUCA maybe? TURNING RED, maybe? They're very self-contained stories, like most Pixars are. That's not to say they absolutely *can't* have sequels, but it's okay if they don't get them, either. Had LIGHTYEAR not flopped, we would've gotten at least another one of those, given the TOY STORY association. (I also wanted to see a second one, myself.)

I think it's kind of telling that their next sequels are to older movies/legacy favorites. INSIDE OUT turns nine years old when the sequel comes out, that's just wild... I mean, outside of the newer movies and the pre-2010 favorites, there's not much else to do. BRAVE seemed like a decent candidate for a part two, but after everything that went down with that movie? It didn't seem like it had much of a future beyond its solid run in 2012, despite Merida's induction into the "Disney Princess" line. GOOD DINOSAUR lost money, and COCO really doesn't need a sequel.

So they've only got two pools to pull from: Either most of the pre-2010s movies (there's no way A BUG'S LIFE 2 happens), or the post-Lasseter movies.

Also, a Pixar filmmaker retweeted this, which is mocking the rumors...

So, yeah, it seems like a big bowl of bunk to me.

[cooltrainerashton]

Music Industry Musing: “Breaking News”

Hello, readers!

Back in the day (circa 2011), before I was my authentic self and had any sense of knowing who I was, I wrote music reviews on my old Tumblr account (still exists but choosing not to link it here). I’m sad to say I didn’t continue it, as I didn’t think I could sustain it. Had I, I might’ve found more success as a writer, but I digress.

I thought it would be fun to return to this, but with less of a haughty “Look at how smart I think I am” mentality and take a more mature, curious approach to different aspects of the music industry I find fascinating and share those musings with all of you.

My introductory post for this is regarding Michael Jackson’s promotional single “Breaking News” from his 2010 posthumous album “Michael”. I knew of the song but never looked into it. And I have to say - this song is catchy! I’ve probably listened to it 50 times, and I didn’t know about all the controversy the song had until I researched it further.

Apparently, there are many out there who believe Jackson didn’t record this and was actually an artist who impersonates him by the name of Jason Malachi, and it’s resulted not only in litigation from the Jackson Family Estate but also led to it being taken off music streaming platforms.

It almost didn’t surprise me when I discovered that, as I listened to it a few times and had the thought of enjoying the difference in sound for what we usually hear from Michael. However, once I read up on the song, it made sense why it sounded different.

In fact, after listening to it 50 times, I realized that, despite how much of a bop it is, it really isn’t that original. Several realizations came to mind from my listening session, and it’s so hard not to think about the unoriginality when you lay it all out in front of you.

-”Breaking News” takes lyrical inspiration from Britney Spears’ “Piece of Me” and certainly isn’t the first song to take a shot at the media -The song’s bassline borrows from Michael Jackson’s 2001 hit single “You Rock My World”, but the percussion on each are different -The song features background music effects reminiscent of Gwen Stefani’s 2005 hit single “Hollaback Girl”. -The aesthetic he-he-hes are reminiscent of Michael Jackson’s iconic 1983 single, “Billie Jean”. -Some vocals are also reminiscent of Lady Gaga’s 2011 single “Judas”.

There may be others, but it begs many questions from Epic Records in terms of the song’s legitimacy. Is this song a bop? Absolutely! Will I want to use it as inspiration for a plot point? Definitely! But does it borrow heavily from other sources, even if it’s imagined from Michael’s perspective? Ouch, yeah, it’s hard not to see.

But, criticism from a non-important consumer aside, the legitimacy was also brought into question because of Epic’s decision to put out the song, despite overwhelming sentiment that the singer on the track wasn’t Jackson. It’s a valid theory - in some ways, despite their voice not being quite as unique as Jackson’s, it’s sung in his style, and the singer also has a somewhat fuller or stronger voice.

If there’s any room to suggest that it’s in the realm of possibility that they (allegedly) had Malachi record it in an effort to pass it on as Jackson’s, what was their reasoning?

-Was it because they knew they would get less revenue from it if it didn’t have Jackson’s name attached? -Did they love the song or think it would strategically help them in some way? -Was Malachi convinced to do this as a favor for their helping launch or further developing his career?

We may never know, but, to me, this feels like a missed opportunity. They very easily could’ve released EPs for Jackson’s songs (especially since there were other songs whose authenticity was also questioned), or they could’ve put together a tribute compilation. If Malachi had recorded it under the guise that it wasn’t Jackson but sung in his style, this would’ve been better leveraged for Epic’s and Malachi’s reputations. But money talks, and that could’ve been the sole reason they needed to try to pull a fast one on Jackson’s fans. And, given all the hoopla in the media over the last 11+ years, it’s hard to say what the real story is between Malachi’s and Sony’s recanted statements.

Now that I’m done rambling, what do y’all think?

[genidma]

Turning concerns into action

There have been some developments during the recent years which are very concerning. In random order and including but not limited to: 

A ban on Transgender individuals being able to serve in the military. A ban, which has been repealed under the new administration. Source.

The rise of political extremism in general. 

The 2021 attack on the Capitol Hill is one symptom of this rising extremism. Resulting into:

5 casualties (1 apparently due to a drug overdose), many injuries, including 138 police officers (to quote from Wikipedia). As well, Wikipedia also cites that, quote: four officers who responded to the attack died by suicide within seven months.

Damage to property. 

Damage to the reputation of the United States. 

On the topic of abortion: Abortion was made legal in the United States in 1973. Source. More recently the Supreme Court of the United States has overturned this right. Source via BBC news.

The Overruling itself: Here, to me that 6 (or 5 Source) individuals can decide the future for 100′s of millions of women across United States. I feel that something is very broken with this model. This very model sets a dangerous precedent for the future. 

Before I continue, I must highlight that I do not think or believe that there is a conspiracy and that there are forces around the world that are collaborating in order to target individuals from certain backgrounds. From my limited vantage point, it is simple the absence of compassion and reason. This is superstition and dogma at it’s best or worst. 

Meanwhile:

The Chinese Communist Party has been going after effeminate men. Source via Google. I have not looked into this issue in a lot of detail. But I realize that these behaviours/actions have already claimed at-least one casualty.

As a single-father who happens to be somewhat effeminate myself: I am working on enabling my basics. To be a good father, find good/decent shelter, eat good nutrition, exercise regularly, be in a good relationship, have friends around, enjoy life and to continue doing good work to help others. But first I need to help myself.

 There are a lot of other things that the CPP does that I disapprove of strongly. But I have been and I wish the people of China well. To wish anyone anything else would be a negative thought. 

Overall and looking at events from a worldwide perspective. In the domains of Gay/LGBTQ rights. That is an on-going struggle. 

Human-rights are hard-fought. This is a process that has happened over hundreds, if not thousands of years:

Today, not as many individuals are burnt alive, being accused of witch-craft of sorcery. At-least this is not something that happens in the developed part of the world.

But this is something that did happen roughly about 600 years ago. Source. Tens of thousands (possibly a lot more) individuals were killed and/or burnt alive.

In the United States, there is recorded evidence of something like this happening 300 years ago. Source via the Salem Witch Trials.

It would be a stretch to share these events from history, in light of a reality whereby something like this was not happening today. 

Nigerian female student burnt to death being accused of sending blasphemous text messages. Source.

Someone who is Trans has probably been attacked for being Trans somewhere in the world. Via Google News Search. Link

For me personally, I have also changed my views on a number of topics. 

More than two decades ago and when I first came to Canada I used to be slightly homophobic. But I do not think it was a view that was extremely toxic in it’s entirety. As I did not go to the extent, whereby I would want my own personal opinion to be forced on someone. If someone wanted to be gay and lived their life the way they wanted, then that is their choice and the choice of their partner. 

I was 21 around the time and there was a fellow who was openly gay. And I used to treat that individual differently. But 6 months working with this individual, I knew it in my heart that I must offer the individual an apology. Because whatever my personal belief/thinking on the issue may have been. The individual who I was working with deserved as much respect and it was my responsibility to treat them just like everyone else. So the apology was necessary. I was glad that the individual accepted my apology with no hard feelings attached.

Since that time and over the following years, I sought to question my stance on homophobia. In fact it may have taken a full 15 + years for me to fully realize that being gay/queer was completely normal. If you have someone in your life who loves you for who you are, then to me it doesn’t matter if the individual is one one gender or another. Whether they have a disability or not. You are lucky to enjoy life’s beautiful moments with someone.  

Coming back to what I meant to share. The thing is, it was something within my own psyche that I had been suppressing. Because I realized that I loved reading Vogue when I was growing up, I really enjoyed looking at pictures of individuals with paint on their faces. Dressing up in fashionable clothing.

But coming to terms with who I really was in my 30′s was a really difficult process. It felt like I experienced violence. But difficult to articulate this in words and not to play a victim card. That is not my intention. But the reactions, the changing attitudes and the violence. The combined effect of it all resulted into something that definitely had a negative impact on my psychology. And so, for almost a decade now, I have been working towards coming to terms with who I am. Coming to terms in the sense that a big part of this process has been to let go of relationships. Relationships are a huge part of our identity. But if certain views are being reinforced non-verbally. That these views are not grounded in reason and these very views could be toxic to one’s well-being. In such a reality the decision is quite simple. Leave. You cannot change others. But for the sake of your sanity and well-being, you must leave. There is absolutely no point trying to make a relationship work. It doesn’t matter if you have known that individual for 5, 10, 15, 30 years of your life. You need to spend your time with those who lift you up and encourage you to do better.  

On the super important topic of women’s rights and the rights of all genders really. Including males. We live in a male dominated global society. Take a look around the leadership positions across the various institutions. 

Yes a lot of gains have been made and depending on how far back you’d want to go in history. I would think that this is something that would depend on a culture by culture basis. 

But while a lot of progress has been made. A lot more work remains to be done. The recent decision by the SCOTUS (Supreme Court of the United States) is a step in the backwards direction.

However, I am not quick to jump to a conclusion here. Because the ban on anyone who is Transgender to serve in the military during President Trump’s administration was repealed. From my vantage point: 

I am not an American. But I care about my friends across the world. Including United States. Particularly the United States. Because it is and truly has been an incredible institution. There is respect for human-rights and the freedom to power dreams. There are also checks and balances in place against government or institutional over-reach. There are an incredible number of positives. 

However with all of that being said, if the United States or any other institution chooses to take a step which makes life unbearably difficult for 100′s of millions of individuals. Then such a move/decision/verdict should be protested against. In a manner that is peaceful. 

The 167.5 million women across United States were not consulted regarding this issue. How can <10 individuals decide what the will of the individuals should be regarding such an important matter. 

To me, a loophole was exploited in the judicial system. I sincerely hope that such a mechanism (or absence thereof) is not exploited in order to continue to strip individuals of their rights.  

Also, this decision is within the context of boundaries of the institution itself. What about the other nation/states that may soon choose to follow in a copy-cat manner. 

It’s ironic that an institution (SCOTUS) that is responsible to uphold the rule of the law, is the very institution that has now passed a verdict whereby rights are taken away. 

Taking human-rights away is something that typically happens in the less developed part of the world. Development is not just related to the enablement of an economy. Human lives matter. Freedoms matter. 

Since this section of the blogpost is supposed to be about me changing my views. I grew up in a male dominated society. Women’s right is an issue that I seriously started thinking about after the birth of my daughter. So I have to ask myself, am I thinking/acting/behaving in a manner whereby I am helping create a world that is more just, more equitable. It’s not just the fact that we should create a world where non-male genders must not experience undue hardship. But the quality of their lives should be as good. 

Overall, individuals and communities decide their own future.  And yes, the degrees of freedoms is something that controls that. 

For me, I was able to question and then I worked towards changing some of my beliefs. (Definition: something that is accepted, considered to be true, or held as an opinion). 

If I didn’t do that, then it would have been a huge loss for me. I would not have met some really amazing people from the many different walks of life. As well, I may not have grown as much as an individual. 

There is a tendency amongst our species to form groups. In extreme cases to then redirect energies towards stripping others of their rights.

We should not be stripping individuals of their rights (within reason). In fact it should be to the contrary. We should be working towards creating a world that is more just, more equitable, more open and tolerant. 

To build a great human society, you need to continually focus on enabling a better standard for human-rights and also increasingly better standards relating to human-wellbeing.

I am changing and I encourage you to also think about how you may need to change. For me, listening to Richard Dawkins, Sam Harris, some of Daniel Dennett ( truly wish I had more time in a day) and also the late Christopher Hitchens. Beginning to learn about Reason. There is life before and there is life after the day when I started shedding the dogmatic/possibly superstitious ways of thinking. 

I feel that there is real need to reason about issues from a humanistic perspective. 

If we do that well, then our quality of life will improve and we would be better equipped and as it relates to tackling risks existential of a nature. As great contributions can/do come from all walks of life. This is also a reason why diverse communities tend to do better and have done better throughout the course of human history. 

So I am going to go and meditate on how I continue to act and behave. But I will also be talking and I would be very open to collaborating with others. So that: 

There are clear, transparent, visible incentives for enabling and equipping citizens. 

At the same time, there is deterrence for spreading harmful messages or messaging. 

There are increased avenues via which effective communications can occur. There are a number of issues, across a whole range of areas. In a lot of these cases and situations, the need is to create empathetic bonds. Here, you need a lot of patience.

Last but not the least. I am keenly aware of the reality that the only individual that I can change is myself. And that also is a continual work in progress. For me, I treat others the way I want to be treated. I hope that you will do the same.

[violet-emi]

Childe X Reader, College AU? Whichever way you want it Childe sleeps around a lot, but can only really fall asleep cuddling someone. He asks you, his friend, if he can cuddle you to fall asleep. He only asks that you don't develop romantic feelings for him. So you agree, only to find out down the road that hey, you love him. He finds out about your feelings and cuts off the friendship and the cuddling, only to realize that he misses you deeply and doesn't want to fall asleep with anyone but you.

SKHDHKSKSHSHH THATS SO CUTE?

I’m assuming you’ve also either read or would be interested in “Biting On a Rose” by tartaglia_devotee on ao3 (same idea but smutty w xiao)

This one is sad btw

Monoceros Caeli

Tartaglia is your average, run-of-the-mill frat boy and fuckboy, rarely attending any classes, and seemingly permanently hungover in the few classes he does attend.

He’s the typical bad boy, he sleeps around, he drinks, he smokes, he does it all- at least on the outside. Very few people know of his somewhat shameful secret, if you could call it that, but he can’t sleep well. The only thing that fixes his nightly tossing and turning is to have someone to cuddle.

It doesn’t work with stuffed animals or body pillows, believe me, he’s tried, and it’s absolutely crushing to his reputation that the ever so popular Tartaglia needs to be coddled as he sleeps.

It’s so embarrassing for him, in fact, that he has to ask someone for help for his very specific problem. It’s got to be someone he can trust, someone who won’t spill this little secret and someone who’s casual enough to not think much of it. He doesn’t particularly want to be tied down to anyone, you know?

Which is why he thinks it’s the perfect idea to sign you up for the job, you’re one of his friends- his real friends, not the ones he sleeps around with. He can trust you with this secret, and he’s quite proud of himself for this idea. He’ll be sleeping quite soundly with you around, hopefully.

“So, would you mind sleeping with me? Not a one time thing, but like, every night.” He confidently texts you.

Any reasonable person would be fucking floored by what he just sent, but considering it’s the Tartaglia, the man who never sleeps in the same bed twice, you decide to bite.

“I thought you didn’t sleep with friends?” You ask.

“I don’t mean fucking, you gotta keep quiet about what I’m going to ask you.” He replies.

Interesting, he’s never one to talk about anything serious.

“Go on.”

“It’s super embarrassing, but I can’t really sleep without cuddling someone-“

“Are you being serious right now?”

“Cmon, I thought we were friends! My sleep has been abysmal lately, I need this!”

“Can’t you cuddle with one of your fuckbuddies?”

“They get the wrong idea, it’s such a hassle- cmon, I’ll owe you a million favors!”

“Oh my god, fine, you can sleep over.”

“You’re the best! Please don’t tell anyone about this, and it goes without saying, don’t fall for me~”

“Don’t show up to my door drunk and don’t eat my food.”

“No promises, girlie!”

That absolute fucking moron. You now have to clean up every single night because he’s going to crash at your place for god knows how long, apparently because he needs cuddles to fall asleep.

What you don’t expect, is him to be knocking at your door the very same night. You were in bed, eyes shut, and about to sleep when you hear knocking at the door and a familiar voice-

“Hey girlie~”

You open the door. Tartaglia is there, holding 2 convenience store bags and a cheeky grin on his face.

“I brought snacks.” He raises the bags and walks inside right past you. “And I’m here to claim my good nights sleep, starting today, ending when you fall for me.” He sets the bags onto the table and makes himself at home alarmingly quick.

You both are exhausted, so you immediately return to bed with Tartaglia following closely behind. You don’t really know what you had signed yourself up for when the moment he found his way under your sheets, he clung to you like his life depended on it.

He was completely covering you, his hands tangled through your hair and every inch of his body pressed upon yours. It’s perfectly normal to be flustered in that kind of situation, so you endured it, just so he can get his sleep and get out of your bed as soon as possible.

It was a sleepless night for you, constantly worried about moving too much and accidentally waking up your new bedmate. You had hoped that this would be a one time thing, but you couldn’t really fight it when Tartaglia showed up at your door the very next night.

You were already tired from not sleeping well the last night- nobody could blame you for taking the time to enjoy your time with him. He held you tight, made you feel safe and warm, and oh so tired. You let yourself be welcomed in his homely embrace and let the sweetest dreams possible fill your head.

Waking up in Tartaglia’s arms was something that you could really get used to if he helped you sleep so well- maybe you wouldn’t mind him in your bed every night if it meant you would be held like that.

Which is why, when Tartaglia shows up at your door for a third night in a row, you’ve already quickly adjusted to his presence and find your way to bed, letting him embrace you for many nights to come.

It becomes regular for the two of you to fall asleep in each other’s arms. It’s such a nice feeling to be held by him, and the way that he always comes home to you at the end of the day, it can’t be helped that your heart began sprouting a love for him.

It started out small at first, simply leaving his favorite snacks out for him to grab and giving him a key so he could let himself in. It got worse when you began feeling the need to get to bed before he could let himself in, as every time he hugged you, your heart couldn’t help but race. You started getting scented soaps to hopefully smell nicer? Anything to make him want to stay-

Which is why it’s so scary when he suddenly doesn’t show up one day. You wake up, expecting to be held lovingly, but Tartaglia is nowhere to be found- the bed is cold and empty, and your head hurts. What happened to him? Where did he go? Does he hate you?

It really showed at this point that you had feelings for him, the exact kind that would drive him away. Maybe he saw them already and he left far before- these thoughts filled your head all day. These thoughts persisted even when lying awake in bed, as you hear your door open. You want to get up so bad, to see if it’s Tartaglia, but you don’t want to see him in fear he’ll see your worry.

He climbs into bed and cuddles you once more, as though he was never gone. His embrace doesn’t comfort you the way it once did, as now your heart flutters from his touch and races out of fear. You want to ask so bad why he wasn’t with you last night-

“Heyyy, I’m back, I was out yesterday, I think I fucked someone and I was totally drunk.” He giggled into your ear lazily. “You awake?”

He pokes your cheek as you hope he simply loses interest and moves on. He answered your question for you, and it hurts just a tad. He’s only in your bed because he can’t sleep, he’s a playboy and fucks half of campus, and he’s going to hop into another girl’s bed the moment he sees your feelings for him. It doesn’t hurt just a tad anymore, your heart aches.

It’s so bittersweet to be held so lovingly each night but never be loved back.

Each night with him, no matter how much he holds you, only makes your heart break a little bit more. Each wonderful moment of sleepy bliss with him tears into your heart more and more when you know that he’ll be in someone else’s bed if you confess.

But it hurts, it hurts so much to go through heartbreak every night- to experience true bliss only to have it torn away by the realization that he doesn’t want your feelings. Perhaps it’s worse that you experience that bliss every night because it only makes your heart ache once again when it ends.

It’s time to confess your feelings, your heart feels torn from your sleepless nights- it can’t take any more bittersweet nights, this is all to get it off your chest-

That’s what you tell yourself, but it doesn’t soften the crushing blow of the disappointed face that Tartaglia gives you.

“Cmon, I told you this was a no feelings thing. I thought I could trust you on that one.” His brows are furrowed and he walks away, shattering your heart into so many pieces, into the smallest passion-red grains of sand you can imagine.

He already knew about these feelings, but to hear such a direct confession- this is exactly what he feared. He was so sick of everyone getting the wrong idea, he just wanted a good nights rest and even someone he thought he could trust ends up getting the wrong idea.

At least Tartaglia had many different beds to choose from, and he’s doing just fine without you-

Is what he tells himself.

Obviously anytime he doesn’t fall asleep cuddling someone, he can barely sleep, but nowadays even with physical intimacy, nothing feels just like the way you welcomed him with open arms.

Even in someone else’s bed, skin on skin and not an inch of separation, he didn’t feel the slightest bit comforted. Nothing felt like you, like home, like love. He ended up having his nights become as sleepless as yours, until one day he sees your key upon his dresser.

He misses you. He misses you so dearly- even for a night, he wants to hold you once more.

He feels almost welcomed when he sees his favorite snacks always on your table, as he lets himself into your bed- you’re fast asleep once more.

He doesn’t wake up with you in his arms that morning. Instead, he wakes up to a puffy eyed menace kicking him off of your bed.

“Who the hell do you think you are? Why do you still have my key!” You raised your voice.

“Look- I’m sorry!” He yelped.

“Sorry? For what? Making fun of me and stringing me along?” You choked.

“I never meant to-“ He tried to grab at your shoulders to calm you down.

“What, hear me confess my feelings and look at me with disgust?” Your words held venom.

“I can’t sleep anymore without you, I need you-“

“Go sleep with someone else.” Your words turn ice cold.

“I just wanted you to know that I like you too-“ he tries to fit in between your words.

“You like me too? I hope you know that my feelings died the day you shoved me away. Get out.” You were seeing red, tears spilling out uncontrollably. How could he shoot down your feelings then show up one day thinking that you’d welcome him back with open arms?

It’s only basic self care to cut him out of your life, out of your mind-

But his smiles plague your mind no matter how much his words had cut you in two.

It’s for the best that you push him away, out the door, and make sure that he can never get back in. Just seeing his face hurts.

[misscarolineshelby]

Spanked

Part Two: First Day

Pairing: Modern Tommy Shelby x Reader Words: 1,345 Warning: None…This is only the beginning!

Original Blog: @queenshelby (this is just my backup account as I have been having Tumblr issues)

When you told your friends and roommates about what had happened to you that morning, they couldn’t believe it.

Whilst you were excited to be working for one of the largest enterprises in the UK, they were more intrigued by the fact that you were going to work directly for Thomas Shelby who was a well-known business man and who was quite popular with the ladies across the country.

The 39-year-old had quite a reputation which is what attracted these women. But you decided that you wouldn’t be one of them.

According to your friend, he was the perfect mix between an elegant business owner and a working a class man. He was different to many others out there and, unlike the other men in charge of other big corporations in the UK, he had built his wealth by himself.

Of course, when you read his name on the business card, you remembered reading the rumours in the papers. According to the London Telegraph, he was said to be involved in some illegal businesses as well and it was believed that he had built his empire through drug trafficking and illegal race fixing. But these were just rumours. Thomas Shelby hadn’t served any prison time and was never convicted of any crimes. It was only his brother, Arthur Shelby, who was charged with two murders but never convicted.

He was also involved in politics, having acted as an MP until it became too boring for him. Luckily for him, he maintained connections to other politicians and judges and, miraculously, he had no problems getting licences for any and all of his business operations.

But none of this bothered you much. You saw this job as an opportunity and stepping stone of some sort.

***

Despite your lack of interest in the man himself though, you listened to your friend’s advice when it came to appropriate office attire.

‘You cannot possibly wear this’ your roommate said as she watched you put on a grey coloured suit and a black blouse.

‘That’s what you wear to an office though’ you said somewhat confused while looking into the mirror.

‘Men like something to look at. At least wear a dress and show some legs. You never know, you might even find your prince charming’ your roommate then said with a cheeky smile before disappearing into her room and returning with three dresses for you to choose from.

Of course, she had a point. You had been single for two years and, before that, you had one boyfriend who was just as nerdy as you were. He was your first and your last.

After trying on all three dresses, you chose an elegant knee length black dress but, when you put on some stockings and shoes, your roommate shook her head again.

‘Oh god no. Please let me style you’ your roommate insisted.

‘No, I don’t have time’ you huffed out, looking at your watch.

‘I will style you up for your first day and then I will call you a taxi. I will use my father’s credit card. He won’t even notice’ your roommate said and, after some convincing, you reluctantly agreed.

Your roommate quickly found some suspenders and stockings in her draws and made you put them on. Then, she looked for some shoes, but none of the ones she owned would fit you.

Eventually, she found a pair of black high heels in your other roommate’s wardrobe who, luckily, had the same shoe size as you.

Finally, she applied your make up and straightened your hair. It looked perfect and she was certainly impressed with her own work.

‘Holy shit, I am fucking awesome’ your roommate then said and you couldn’t help but laugh.

‘I look good’ you said somewhat surprised as you looked into the large mirror in your bedroom.

‘You fucking do. Go and get yourself a suitor’ she teased you and you shook your head.

‘No, I am there to work, not to flirt. Despite, I don’t even know how to flirt’ you admitted and your roommate couldn’t help but giggle.

***

When you arrived at the offices of Shelby Company Limited, you were greeted by a tall dark-haired woman who showed you to your new office.

It was near the reception area and you were surprised by the layout of the building. Everything was made of glass and the floors looked like marble. It was incredible.

Lizzie explained to you how things worked around the office and told you that you would be reporting to a man by the name of Michael Grey.

‘I thought I will be reporting to Mr Shelby’ you said somewhat surprised, causing her to laugh.

‘Sweetheart, please don’t flatter yourself. You are here on your merit but no one new reports directly to Mr Shelby apart from me and Michael Grey. He only likes to deal with people he knows and trusts’ Lizzie said before handing you your office swipe card and a stack of files for you to look at it.

Just as you sat down and Lizzie took a seat right next to you, talking you through the accounting software the company uses, you saw Tommy enter the reception area.

He was accompanied by a tall blonde woman who was wearing expensive clothes and was carrying a Louis Vuitton handbag.

‘Who is this?’ you asked curiously, causing Lizzie to look up from the computer.

‘Elaine Sutton. Apparently, she is the flavour of the month. He likes attractive women who don’t talk much, which makes her perfect’ Lizzie chuckled, seemingly annoyed by the woman.

‘How did you become Mr Shelby’s personal assistant?’ you then asked and Lizzie chuckled again.

‘I’ve known Thomas since he was eighteen. I used to be married to his brother, John Shelby, before he passed away’ Lizzie said and you were surprised by her directness and openness about it.

‘Any more questions or can we get back to work now?’ she then said and you apologised to her immediately.

***

Throughout the day, you developed an investment scheme to lower the tax rates the company was otherwise required to pay in the next financial year. This was what you had mentioned to Tommy at the café and you assumed that it was what he wanted you to do when Lizzie handed you the relevant files.

As you were working through them one by one, you also became to notice that Tommy himself was quite the talking point between the women in the office.

His blue eyes, his expensive suits and what tie he was wearing was on today’s agenda in the lunchroom and you couldn’t help but be amused.

Then, all of a sudden, there was dead silence. The room went quiet and no one said a word as the man himself entered the lunch room.

‘Can I get you anything Mr Shelby?’ one of the service employees asked nervously.

‘Can you tell me where the cable ties are kept, please?’ he said in his low gruffy voice and, just when the employee nodded and told him that she would fetch some for him, he approached you.

‘Office attire suits you much better than coffee-stained clothes Y/N’ he observed, causing you to swallow harshly, smile and nod.

‘Thank you for the opportunity, Mr Shelby’ you stammered out in response just as the service clerk returned with some cable ties for Tommy and he walked off.

‘He knows your name’ a short brunette woman observed. ‘I’ve been working here for a year and he hasn’t even noticed me’ she then said before offering you a cup of tea which you gladly accepted.

‘Well, I spilled hot coffee onto him yesterday at the Coffee Bean Café across the road which probably made stick’ you said somewhat embarrassed, causing the woman to laugh before introducing herself to you.

Her name was Emily and she was also working in the business advisory department. Just like you, she was smart and nerdy and you knew that you would be getting along well.

Tag List:

@lilymurphy03 @deefigs @theflamecrystal @desperate-and-broken @weepingstudentfishhorse @livinginfantaxy @rosey1981 @atomicsoulcollecto @peakyboyslover @nerdy4itall@elenavampire21 @hanster1998@mariapaiva13 @fairypitou @harry-is-your-sunflower @zozeebo @lauren-raines-x @kasaikawa @littlewierdalien @sad-huffle-nerd @theflamecrystal @peakymalfoyscullymulder @themissthang@0ghostwriter0 @stylescanbeatmyback @1-800-peakyblinders @datewithgianni @momoneymolife @ntmynouis @lilymurphy03 @mcntsee@cloudofdisney@missymurphy1985 @peakymalfoyscullymulder @otterly-fey @janelongxox @uchihacumdump @basiclassy @being-worthy @chaotic-bean-of-smolness @margoo0 @chocolatehalo @vhscillian @ysmmsy @littlewierdalien @crazymar15  @stickyknightflowerbailiff @im-constantly-fangirling @goldensunflowe-r  @tellingyouastory  @captivatedbycillianmurphy​  @namelesslosers​  @littlewhiterose​  @ttzamara​  @ttzamara @cilleveryone  ​

@peaky-cillian  @queenyshelby ​

@severewobblerlightdragon​  @ysmmsy​  @midnightmystic​

[emerald-chaos]

Insomnia

*gif not made by me, credit goes to the owner*

Hi Everyone! So it's been probably like...10 years since I wrote my last fic lol. Watching TFATWS has rekindled my undying love for Bucky Barnes and I just couldn't help but start writing again. I had to get my feelings out! I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it. I've been considering writing some more parts...so tell me if that's something you'd be interested in! I appreciate any and all constructive feedback or just feedback in general! Much love.

Pairing: Reader x Bucky Barnes

Word Count: 2533 (lowkey popped off...oops)

Warnings: Just in case...vague allusions to a dark past, struggles with mental illness, explicit language, and some suggestive conversation. Oh and some really bad jokes lol. Fluffy and angsty.

No matter how much you tossed and turned, how many sheep you counted, or how much you prayed and pleaded to any higher power that would listen – the release of sleep just wasn’t going to happen. You’re not sure why you were surprised, it’s not like this was the first time. You let out a heavy sigh and toss off the covers. This has been a nightly occurrence for as long as you can remember. When you were trying to rest, when there was no noise to block out the images in your head, it was a battle. A battle which you have always lost.

You flip on the bright florescent lights of the bathroom as you trudge in, dragging your feet in exhaustion. It takes a minute for your eyes to adjust to the harshness of the light as you place your hands onto the countertop. The cool marble feels good against your palms as you close your eyes and lean your head back, another sigh leaving your lips. You twist your neck from side to side, trying to release some tension and maybe get a satisfying pop. No such luck. As you open your eyes and gaze upon the person staring back at you a small laugh tumbles from your chest.

Jesus, she looks awful.

The dark circles that permanently reside below your eyes appear more pronounced than usual. The corners of your mouth hang low and you just look…tired. Like you were rode hard and put away wet.

The bottle of melatonin tucked away on your counter catches your eye. You pick it up and twirl it as you inspect the writing. “Sleep Support” you read, “may help promote restful sleep”. What a load of shit. You place the bottle back down and inspect the orange one next to it. The pills inside were about as useful as the melatonin. Nothing seemed to quiet the voices or stop the scenarios that plagued your mind. You splash some cold water on your face and grab for a towel to pat it dry. Your eyes drift to the mirror again, as if though the water was going to wash away the dead look in your eyes.

Yeah, fat chance.

Before you know it, your legs are carrying you through the compound. The only sounds present are the whirring of various appliances and the soft patter of your feet against the tile floors. The moonlight casts shadows over the various pieces of furniture and lights your path. Your fingers curl around the handle as you pull the sliding glass door open. The crisp outside air kisses your skin as you step out and close the door behind you. You find yourself settling down in your usual spot on the balcony and you sink into the comfort of the chair.

Many a sleepless night has been spent out here, admiring the way the moonlight gleams off of a nearby pond. Before the compound and the balcony, it was a fire escape and a bottle of bourbon. You kind of missed that coping mechanism a little bit. You were thankful, of course, to call this place your home. Thankful to feel safe for once. Thankful to be a part of a team that felt like more of a family than any sorry piece of shit who had been in your life before. Not that you were bitter about that or anything. A little baggage builds character. However, life hasn’t always been kind to you and your stupid brain had a cruel way of constantly reminding you of that fact.

In all honesty, Tony rescued you. You absolutely hated to allow him to relish in that fact, but it was true. He took a chance on a royally fucked up kid out of college who managed to skate by and earn a mechanical engineering degree. If you were to ask him, he would say it was because the first words you said to him were fuck off. Apparently, something about that translated to, “hey, I would be a great addition to your tech and development team”. Although, you were pretty sure you just really meant that he should fuck off. I mean, the guy’s reputation does have a bit of moral gray area to it. Somehow, some way, your tenacity made an impression on the billionaire. Now here you were - living at the Avenger’s compound, sitting on a balcony at 3:30 in the morning because you couldn’t turn your brain off long enough to find some peace and sleep. What a life.

Even as you were sitting here in your special spot, reminiscing about some actual good memories – your brain still tried to drift into the darkness. Glass breaking; voices, thick with hate, engaged in a screaming match, and the cold nights spent trying to find a safe space to eat and lay your head. Your fingers gripped into the arms of the chair as you felt the heaviness in your chest increase.

“God damn it,” you cursed through gritted teeth.

The panic attacks were a second nature at this point, but you still really hated when you lost control. Your eyes closed tight as you tried to rack your brain to remember the bullshit your therapist had told you earlier in the week. Something about 5 things you can see?

“We gotta stop meeting like this, Doll”

The voice ripped you from inside your mind and back to reality. Your eyes opened and were met with a beautiful pair of cerulean ones. You blamed the skip in your heartbeat on your fading panic attack - although, you knew better than that.

“Well, it seems to me that the only logical conclusion is that you’re stalking me, Barnes” you quipped as a grin spread across your face.

“Could say the same about you,” Bucky retorted as he sank into the chair beside you, “besides, been doin’ this a lot longer than you’ve been around”.

You rolled your eyes, but the super soldier had a point. Almost each and every time, aside from the ones that happened when the team was away, you two would meet like this – here on the balcony, both searching for something to replace the sleep that neither of you could find.

“Yeah, we get it, you’re old” a laugh fell from your lips as Bucky snorted at your remark, a grin remaining ever present on his lips.

The familiar silence took over as he leaned his head back against the chair, closing his eyes. Meanwhile, yours were hungrily taking him in - tracing over the stubble on his chin, the soft pinkness of his parted lips. Recently he’d gotten his hair cut and even though you much preferred the long hair, you would rather die than actually admit that to him. Your crush on the 106 year old grumpy ass was one of your best kept secrets. At least, you thought you’d kept it from being painfully obvious.

The man sitting before you, he had a tough exterior and a horrific history, but you knew him better than that. You knew about the way his nose scrunched up when you made him laugh and the way his eyes looked as he listened intently to every story you ever told him. You knew the sweet melody of his laugh and the far off stare that meant he was also held captive by his own thoughts. This late-night rendezvous had become somewhat of a routine for the two of you and you would be lying if you said it wasn’t your favorite part of the day.

The first time it was a short nod and typical white person, thin-lipped smile as you left to find a different spot to suffer alone. Shortly after, it developed into cohabiting the balcony – staying on your own separate sides of course, only occasionally sharing words. Then, before you knew it, the two of you would be sitting beside each other, shooting the shit like you’d known each other for years. Just two, incredibly fucked up individuals, trying to make each other feel a little more human.

Bucky had always given off the quiet, brooding energy. Typically he kept to himself, other than with close friends like Steve, choosing to stand in the corner and listen to the conversation rather than be a part of it. Occasionally he would give a quip during a meeting that would catch people off guard, but mostly he just sat there and stared. The Bucky you had come to know was nothing like the person that others wanted to make him out to be. Sure, at one point he was a masterful assassin who killed like he got pleasure from it – but that wasn’t him. The Winter Soldier and Bucky Barnes were not synonymous.

If only the world could meet Bucky at 3am.

“What’s going on in that empty head of yours over there?” Bucky’s voice once again brought you back to reality as you laid your eyes on the familiar grin plastered across his face.

“Please,” you huffed, cheeks tinted a light shade of pink at the thought of him catching you staring, “which one of us has a college degree again?”

His laugh was a symphony to your ears. Your smile mirrored his when he opened his eyes and turned his head to look at you.

“So, what is it tonight? That nightmare again?” he asked, voice dropping an octave as his facial features softened in a way you really hoped only you got to see.

“Mm, not quite” you responded, your voice a broken whisper.

Bucky wasn’t the type to pry, but with you he wouldn’t even have to. Talking to him, sharing your deepest secrets and fears, telling him about the nightmares that kept you awake at night – it all came easily. Too easily.

“This week it’s...it’s that image of my stupid mother. Standing there with her black eyes and busted lip, telling me that it was me that was the problem. That it was me who...” you swallowed hard, the heaviness creeping back into your chest and tears fighting to wet your eyes. God you hated that you let this get the best of you.

Just as your mind started to bring you back to that dark place it was interrupted by the feeling of warmth spreading over your body. You looked down to see Bucky’s large hand resting right above your knee. When your eyes met again, he gave you a soft look that made your heart scream.

“I’m sorry,” you could tell he meant it as he gave your knee a soft squeeze.

A small smile flashed over your face and you had to resist the urge to reach out and cup his soft, stubbled cheek in your hand.

“Hey, we’re all a little fucked up, right?” you joked.

“Some more than others,” he replied, those beautiful wrinkles appearing around his nose as he scrunched it up with another laugh.

“Thanks, Buck... I’m sure you’d rather be doing anything other than listening to my sob story,” you reluctantly broke eye contact and looked down at the hem of your shirt as you fiddled with it in your fingers.

You were all too aware at the loss of contact as Bucky drew his hand back and leaned back into his chair.

“Doll,” he started as he leaned his head back and closed his eyes again - you could swear you almost saw a grin on his lips, “there are very few things I’d rather do than sit with you on the balcony at 3am”.

At that moment it felt as though time stood still. Sure, you had flirtatious banter back and forth occasionally and made a habit out of spilling your deepest regrets to each other during the wee hours of the morning, but this felt different. This felt like a confession.

You’d be lying to yourself if you tried to convince yourself, or anyone else for that matter, that you didn’t have a thing for him. I mean - who wouldn’t? The guy was a gentleman; he was soft spoken and caring, he was a dork who loved to crack jokes at the most inappropriate times, the type of person who would give you the shirt off of his own back if it meant you were taken care of.

He....well, he was Bucky.

And god damn it if you didn’t love him.

You’re unsure of how much time has passed, but one minute you’re sitting on your chair, chewing your lip and droning on about the man in front of you in your head. The next minute you found yourself on his lap, knees seated on either side of his waist as your legs straddle him and your hands connect with the skin they so desperately craved to feel. Bucky’s eyes opened slowly and met yours as you let the pad of your thumb gently run along the curve of his bottom lip. The uneven breaths leaving your chest hitched as you felt his hands grip your hips softly. Refusing to break eye contact, Bucky gently pressed a kiss to the pad of your thumb. You dragged his lower lip down briefly.

“Well,” he began. His voice was barely above a whisper but it’s thick, lustful tone made you shiver from head to...well, you know, “are you gonna kiss me, Doll? Or do I have to do all the work myself?”

He barely finished his sentence before your lips captured his. It was messy, almost all teeth and tongue. It was needy, as if it was the last time either of you would ever kiss anyone again. It was fucking incredible.

Bucky’s metal arm snaked up your back and found its way into your hair, curling his fingers gently around the strands at the back of your head, as his other arm wrapped around your waist and pulled you closer to his form. He was intoxicating. This whole situation was something you had briefly imagined months ago, but ultimately pushed out of your mind. There was no way that he would ever be interested in someone like you. Yet, here he was, tongue fighting for entrance into your mouth.

You aren’t quite sure who pulled away first. Both of you were gasping for air, chests heaving up and down as you both stared into each other's lust-blown pupils.

“You kiss pretty well for someone who hasn’t had a girlfriend since 1940,” you teased, laughing as he rolls his eyes at the comment.

“You just don’t know when to shut that mouth of yours, do ya?” he practically growled, ever so slightly tightening his grip on your waist, and you almost lost it from just the sound of his voice alone.

“Why don’t you make me, Barnes?” you leaned in close, warm breath fanning over the shell of his ear.

A yelp escaped your throat as you were suddenly jerked up to a standing position, locking your ankles behind his back as he effortlessly held you up by your thighs.

“Oh Doll,” he chuckled darkly into your neck, almost making you pass out from the sensation, “I thought you’d never ask”.

[shushiyuii]

Subject T0M au

This is an Au I’ve had stockpiled for a while wkakdnknak. It’s going to multiple parts too, once I get to working on those. If you have any questions you’re welcome to ask!

I hope you guys enjoy it (Also gimme your fucking requests UwU /lh)

Warnings: Experimentation, injury? And Horror elements (It’s mainly fluff i promise :3)

Words: 3K

Document – T0MMY1NN1T

Assigned to: Doctor Wilbur Soot Watson

Description: Subject T0M was once a [REDACTED] by the name of [REDACTED] [REDACTED]. His age is of kin to an elder teen, probably around the age of [REDACTED] to [REDACTED].

The appearance of Subject T0M is like a human, they have blonde hair and pale skin. Their most common height is 6’3 on average but can change depending on the form. Their face, arms and legs are covered in a black substance of unknown origin, it mainly takes on half of their body and appears to be almost liquid.

Their face is completely black, the only thing apparent is their fangs like a wolf when they open their mouth to feed, multiple fangs, the only other feature on Subject T0M’s face is their light blue eyes that glow in the dark.

Subject T0M isn’t very intelligent, they have some semblance of human intelligence, understanding simple language and commands.

They’re quite approachable as well but Subject T0M is to be approached with caution, as they could be quite dangerous. If angered there’s no knowing what Subject T0M is capable of.

Their abilities consist of being able to manipulate the material of their body, being able to change shape and size, their favourite is to mimic those around them. It is not an exact copy; it is apparent that Subject T0M is themselves because the material of their body will still be there even if they changed forms.

They can also create weaponry and different things from their material but again not exact copies, they’re quite harmless usually.

Subject T0M is to be assigned to Rookie Doctor Wilbur Soot. Under the watch of Philza Watson.

 Entry 01 – 02/09/20—

So today was my first-day researching Subject T0M, from what I can say so far is that they’re quite interesting but so far besides the examinations, they haven’t shown much behaviour. Only staring at me from a distance.

Also, I’m not used to this sort of thing like writing documents and reports, not my favourite thing in the world but it’s not the worst thing either. So, Subject T0M already has a lot of his abilities recorded, I’m just here to see if he develops any noteworthy changes and watch over the guy.

Currently, there is no change in behaviour, he just stares down at me at a distance, like I’m the most interesting thing he’s ever seen, perhaps that’s the case?

He seems so lonely in that containment cell, it’s just an empty white box surrounded by glass, perhaps at some point I could request an upgrade to higher-ups for the lil’ fella? That way he can have a more comfortable place. Rather than a highly lit, bland, cold box.

 Entry 02 – 05/09/20—

So Today, Subject T0M did something quite interesting, it’s a drastic difference from the last few days by just staring at me through the windows of the cells.

You see, instead of just watching me from the other side of the office, as usual, it can get quite boring in the office once you finish the days' assignments of reports, schedules, contracts and more and having to watch this guy and do the usual routine gets quite boring so I decided to work on some personal things and bring my guitar, so I could work on my songs, practising the guitar and stuff.

So, I played some things, the next thing I know is that one moment I’m singing, the next in shock as I look over in disbelief. Subject T0M had moved over towards the window, his hands and face on the glass, dead staring me in my eyes, they were filled with curiosity and interest like an infant listening to music for the first time.

A way to describe it would be that Subject T0M seemed so much happier, but when I stopped, he looked almost disappointed, I stared at him in amazement for a moment and I started to play again, and his expression went back to being amazed.

My music seems to interest Subject T0M so perhaps I should do more research and experiments with different kinds of music to see which they prefer?

Not only that but it’s nice to have someone rather than my dad that enjoys my music. They’re almost my second biggest fan. I’m looking forward to seeing more of this kid.

Entry 03 – 06/09/20—

As of now, I have started the experimentation of music with Subject T0M, he seems to prefer rather upbeat, pop music and general music.

I also played him some songs from popular games, one of them being The Able Sister’s from Animal Crossing, he really seemed to enjoy that one.

Besides the experiments, I’ve started to talk to Subject T0M as it does get lonely here, plus he’s the only other guy here in the department. Although he doesn’t talk, he’s a great listener, nodding whenever I state my opinion and even trying to communicate verbally from time to time, even though he doesn’t seem to have the ability to speak.

And I’ve also seemed to have started a habit of calling Tom or Tommy, it suits him! He’s also been showing more personality, he seems more aggressive like a gremlin but not in a bad way, he’s just displaying more emotion it seems.

Entry 04 – 09/09/20—

So, the experiments and communication of Tommy have made significant progress. He’s become feistier and more vocal, he’s not aggressive in a physical sense, just annoyingly loud. He’s like a fucking child.

And today was another experiment with Tom, with the test subject being myself since it seems safe enough, so need to gather others or security over it.

I entered his containment cell, and the moment I did, Tommy showed no difference in behaviour, to begin with, just a somewhat surprised expression on his face. Probably because this was the first time, he had seen me so close.

I carefully approached at first but then a thought came to me. So far I’ve been treating him like a human so maybe treating him the same way now would have the same effects?

I sat down next to him and started talking to him as usual, and he slowly started to move closer to me, cautiously. He seemed almost nervous, but his focus was on me, rather than himself. I found it rather odd, maybe something is wrong?

Again, he tried talking back but of course, it sounded like a fucking crack pipe, so it didn’t quite work. But he was talking and for some reason, it just brought a smile to my face.

I felt like an older brother would be a way to describe it, I made a promise in my head to protect him. We even tried singing together, it was a lot of fun, I look forward to spending more time with him.

Entry 05 – 12/09/20—

The past couple of days have been a lot of fun with Tommy like I’ve gained a friend. You see, growing up I was always a bit lonely, I was social, but I never found myself clicking with anyone because nobody had the same interests as me, so I turned to focus more on my studies, science in fact like my father told me too. And look at me now!

I’m a training researcher in the same facility as my dad, as this place is one of a kind opportunity, so I guess I got pretty lucky. And it seems Tommy agrees maybe, he reminds me of well me, I don’t want him to be lonely like I was, maybe I could arrange a meeting between other monsters?

Entry 06 – 14/09/20—

Tommy and I have been bonding a lot more lately and I’ve also improved a lot myself with finishing work sooner and taking up more assignments.

Speaking of which my father said if I keep this up, I may get more recognition in the facility, maybe even a promotion which I’m happy about. I’ve sent in a request to the higher-ups to allow Tommy communication of other monsters to which I hope they approve.

Besides that, I was talking to Tommy as per usual and he displayed a different emotion, excitement. He seemed eager to show me something and when I asked, “What is it?”. His form changed to be slightly taller and more of his black substance covered his body but after a while, his form changed to be similar to my own, he tried copying me.

Like physically. It was quite surprising if I’m honest, my shocked expression to Tommy made him realise the situation and immediately changed back and tried to reassure me, I felt bad and tried to reassure him it was okay. It’s funny to look back on.

Entry 07 – 15/09/20—

I got approval from the higher-ups, probably getting special treatment since my dad is one of the higher-ups, others aren’t normally so lucky. Dad, or should I say Doctor Philza? He said we could have a meeting between Tommy and his subject, R4NB00 or as he says Ranboo.

 Dad said that his subject Ranboo does need to socialise more since he appears to have symptoms of social anxiety so maybe this will do them both some good since they both seem to be around the same age. Like Tommy, Ranboo only socialises with him and another subject T3chn0, or the blade, blood god. He’s got quite a reputation around here.

Anyways, I’ll say what I know about Subject R4NB00 as of his report, so I know to look over it in case of emergency.

R4NB00 is a tall humanoid standing above 8 ft tall. They have a black and white fur coat, a thin fur coat to be described as silky. Their coat is black on one side and white on the other, their hair is the same but in the opposite way to his fur.

They have heterochromia in their eyes, one being green and the other a bright red. They also have horns of small height; they aren’t sharp and rather small so they wouldn’t hurt anybody with them. They also have a thin tail, with it being fluffy at the end.

Subject R4NB00 isn’t the biggest fan of the regular attire assigned to all subjects, they rather wear a tuxedo embedded with the facility’s logos. They are also timid, avoiding conflict whenever possible. They also can speak but prefer not to due to being shy, they will only communicate with a select few.

Their abilities consist of having the ability to teleport at will and communicate in an unknown language. They also have weaknesses being unable to touch the water and having a state of mind of when they aren’t in control of themselves, they talk in their unknown language in this state and teleport randomly, they are to be awoken as soon as possible unless they are in this state for a test.

Report 16/09/20-- - Meeting of Subject T0M and Subject R4NB00

Today was the meeting of Subject T0M and R4NB00. Both were properly secured successfully and safely in transportation cells with the required security of 5 guards each in each truck and successfully transported to the meeting facility without stress or failure.

Both researchers were safely secured behind the required monitoring window.

The meeting was rather successful between the two creatures. To begin with, when the two saw each other they both maintained distance, for Subject R4NB00 it was because they were anxious about meeting another creature and for Subject T0M, meeting somebody else rather than their researcher.

Subject T0M was the first to contact Subject R4NB00 by trying to communicate verbally with them, it was unsuccessful and resulted in Subject R4NB00 being confused. The two sat in silence for a moment longer until Subject T0M attempted another move of contact by cautiously approaching Subject R4NB00, which resulted in them backing up into a nearby wall and trying to get away from Subject T0M.

Subject T0M then backed off and changed their form to mimic R4NB00, this is theorised to be Subject T0M trying to either comfort or entertain Subject R4NB00, they then changed back into their regular form.

Despite being confused, Subject R4NB00 seemed to notice that Subject T0M meant no harm and then tried to approach subject T0M. Subject T0M did not move.

When Subject R4NB00 approached, there was approximately 1 meter between the two, Subject R4NB00 looked at the two researchers to look for approval to which he got from Doctor Philza via a thumbs up.

Subject T0M curious looked to where R4NB00 was looking and noticed the two researchers and made a noise of happiness towards his researcher, to which Doctor Soot responded with a smile and a thumbs up.

Both Subjects looked back at each other and sat down beside each other. Subject R4NB00 began to communicate with Subject T0M, Subject R4NB00 introduced themselves and made small communication, to which Subject T0M responded positively too, as they couldn’t communicate back. After that, the meeting was concluded.

After their meeting, when asked about the meeting by their researchers. Subject R4NB00 responded positively to seeing Subject T0M again and talked positively about them despite not being able to communicate.

Subject T0M appeared upset a few moments after the meeting, scratching at the windows of his cell, whining. When asked if he wished to see Subject R4NB00 again, he responded positively. Another meeting between the two has been arranged.

Entry 08 – 17/09/20—

Tommy seems to miss his new friend quite a bit but it’ll be a while before the next meeting between them as it has to be approved again and it’ll be a while.

Doing our normal routine keeps him happy for a while but if I leave him for more than 15 minutes he begins to whine again. I wasn’t quite sure what to do as I couldn’t keep him company all day.

On my lunch break I talked to my co-worker Doctor Puffy about the matter, she’s a smart gal and rather motherly, she reminds me of my mom at times. She suggested that I give Tommy a gift, like a plush bear to befriend so he wouldn’t feel so lonely while I was gone.

So, I quickly made my way to a store, it was rather odd to see myself, an adult in a toy aisle but I found a decent plush. It’s a Minecraft spider plushie. I gave Tommy the plushie and introduced him to the plush, when I asked him what he wanted to name the plush he responded with a sound, it honestly sounded like he said shroud, so I suggested it. He responded happily so I guess we now have Shroud the spider.

Now I’ve got the peril of getting medication for my father as he’s somehow gotten sick.

Incident Report  #19283 – 18/09/20-- -

No staff or other creatures were harmed during the containment breach, minor damages to the building, broken walls and broken windows within the cell. All to be fixed within a minimum of 3 hours. Subject T3CHN0 was successfully contained in a holding cell as we interviewed him as to why he breached containment, to which he responded that “Nobody told me where Phil was.”.

Doctor Philza was then contacted to talk to Subject T3CHN0 to explain his current predicament of being sick, to which Subject T3CHN0 huffed in response and refused to cooperate with us further.

Subject T3CHN0 escaped containment in a rampage, the reasoning being as he was not informed of his researchers’ location, as Doctor Philza was sick for the past two days before the incident. Both researcher and creature are rather close with each other, as to why the Subject was upset.

Prior to the incident (recorded by security cameras), Both Subjects of Doctor Philza were speaking to each other about the current location of their researcher, both concluded that neither of them had any idea of where the Doctor was, both subjects ask their temporary carer as to where their researchers’ location was, to which the carer wouldn’t respond so Subject T3CHN0 decided to find his answers.

Subject T3CHN0 broke through his containment cell’s window and then proceeded to break through multiple walls trying to find his researcher.

(The document then goes into detail about what T3CHN0 did during his rampage before he was contained)

During the rampage, Subject T3CHN0 broke through the walls of Doctor Soot’s office and his creature, Subject T0M. As Subject T3CHN0 entered the office, Doctor Soot was frightened at the unexpected visitor as tried to get away from the approaching Subject T3CHN0, Doctor Soot demanded that he get away, to which T3CHN0 huffed in response.

Subject T0M took some time to register that his researcher was in danger, but when he heard he did, he sprang into the action of defending his researcher.

His form changed into one of being described as fearsome, they changed heights to one over 15 ft tall, his hands turned into claws, long sharp fangs became visible, a sharp tail and pair of horns after appeared with this form. (Doctor Soot has been requested to do further research into this form)

Subject T0M roared in warning towards the other, then proceeded to pounce through their containment cells window, shards of glass scattered throughout the room.

They then ran towards their researcher and in a crouched position, picked up his fallen researcher and held him close to his chest, growling furiously at T3CHN0.

The two Subjects stared at each other for a moment until T3CHN0 began to communicate verbally by asking where his researcher was, Doctor Soot was too much in a state of shock to respond.

Subject T0M held his researcher closer and tried to comfort him in a way of purring, even nuzzling his researcher for a response, to which Subject T3CHN0 left due to being impatient.

Subject T0M continued to hold onto his researcher and eventually Doctor Soot snapped out of his state to stare in awe of Subject T0M, When Subject T0M saw their researcher responding he made worried sounds to them, to which Doctor Soot responded with a laugh and said: “I’m fine buddy”.

Subject T3CHN0 was then contained shortly afterwards.

[just-another-hhazbin]

I have a question for you:

I'm aroace, and while I love Alastor and that he's ace and potentially aro (not sure if the aro part is definitely canon or not), apparently Viv has said in past streams that he's egocentric/doesn't love anyone but himself and I'm concerned that that's why she made him aroace. Especially if he's definitely aro, since if he were only ace it'd be less questionable imo. Granted, he does have friends so the "only loves himself" thing may not be 100% true, and these things could still change while the show's in development. I'm just kinda worried about Viv's reasoning. What do you think?

Hello, fellow aroace! I find it both amusing and suiting that I received this ask several hours after I queued the ADHD Alastor reblog, because to me, they are very similar subjects.

To the best of my knowledge, Alastor has been confirmed ace in canon by Vivziepop. However, only Faustisse, who i don’t believe is any longer a member of the Hazbin team and has never been in charge of such official decisions, openly declared him aromantic.

However, Vivz has hinted at this, but holds off at the last moment because she wants “people to ship whoever they like and to have fun” (paraphrased).

That’s... not great reasoning and vaguely problematic in and of itself, implying that aromantic people cause problems and etc., but whatever. It’s a smart marketing decision and helps prevent the fandom from turning into even more of a bloodbath than usual, so I understand why she decided that. Do I agree? No. Do I understand? Yes.

However, it is issues such as what you bring up that makes me somewhat thankful we haven’t seen him officially declared aro (yet).

If you’ve seen my aspd!Alastor or other aspd posts, then you probably know some of my thoughts on the subject. For those who haven’t, I’ll take it from the top.

I... am also concerned. I think in the end that how much depth Alastor’s characterization is given will determine whether or not the aro is a good move. 

From what we’ve seen and what’s been given, Alastor is a manipulative, unhinged, sadistic, vaguely narcissistic asshole who cares nothing for anyone other than himself. On that description alone, I would very much recommend not labeling him as aromantic. Aro people have had enough of that stereotype, thank you very much. Also, people such as that can experience romantic attraction, it’s just that they tend to be douchebags about it.

That being said, the Alastor comic does give me hope.

(If you haven’t read the comic, go do so, because there be spoilers ahead. https://www.hazbinhotel.com/alastor-comic/page-1)

Yes, he’s a generally annoying pain in the ass dressed in bright red. However, he also wasn’t just going about his business killing everyone for the Hell of it. Sure, he might do that sometimes, but I’ll take “sometimes.” Furthermore, he wasn’t purposefully extra-dickish to customer service people (unless you count feeding the birds, which should be considered a crime but also, Radio Demon, could’ve been worse) and he tips street musicians while being kind to his fans. 

He obviously does want social interactions, and was increasingly frustrated and upset when everyone fled from him and the rose wilted at his touch. He wants positive interactions! He wants joy and pretty things and obviously does care about what others think of him, despite statements to the contrary.

And of course, the culmination of him indeed committing a murder and going full cannibal on someone’s ass... after stepping in to stop that person from abusing a customer, giving him a second chance, and then intervening again to stop the asshole from assaulting someone else.

None of these actions had any benefit to him. He knows that this will only increase his reputation as do-not-fuck-with-or-speak-to at worst, and have no affect at all at best. But he does it anyway.

So. If this is the Alastor Vivz sees and if we get more of him, of an Alastor who yes is a bit of an unhinged serial killer cannibal but also seeks out positive interspersonal interactions and cares about strangers, then I would be much more settled with giving him an official aromantic designation. Because then it’s not just that he said “fuck people and relationships; I’m a narcissistic sadist,” but that he’s searching for personal connections that resonate with him, and romance just isn’t it.

So. Yeah. Right now a lot of shit has been said about Alastor official and otherwise, half of it contradicting itself, and while I am Definitely Concerned about him playing into the stereotypical tropes around bad aro rep, I do have some hope that maybe it could play out well.

Also, unrelated to Vivz and how she and her team handles things, there’s always the fact that Alastor’s brother from another mother is undoubtedly Hannibal, who is the most in-love cannibalistic sadistic narcississtic serial killing gay to ever gay (or kill), so that’s a nice little counter-argument to have if and when people decide to be shit about Al’s character + acearo rep.

[amitlee]

hello there :) uhm would it be possible to do 10 and 14 (if that’s okay) with lee!techno and you can choose the ler! :)

Barriers

10. “Im not ticklish.”

Lee!Techno Ler!Ghostbur

I completely forgot to put 14 in there somewhere, but I kinda did 10! Also, sorry I left in my inbox for so long!

———————————————————————

“Technoblade! The most wonderful thing happened today!” Ghostbur enthusiastically explained. To his friend who was currently bent over farming potatoes. He doesn’t understand why he still grows the vegetable since the contest had been over for many months now.

Technoblade shot up from his bent over position having been startled from the unexpected voice. “Hello Ghostbur, I’m busy.” He said, now settling back down to continue his work. Don’t get him wrong, Ghostbur was a delight to have around, but the reminder of Wilbur was something he didn’t want at the moment.

The ghost’s smile never faltered as he went on to tell the hybrid about his day. The story was rather uninteresting, but Techno listened to the rambling as if it was background noise. He was mostly tuning it out until he heard a series of strange events begin to unfold.

“-so I threw him over my shoulder and his axe fell out of his hand, thankfully because you never kno-“

Techno cut him off with a raise of his hand. “I’m sorry, what are you talking about again?”

Ghostbur sighed impatiently and placed a hand on his hip, he looked like a disappointed mother. “I knew you weren’t listening. I’m talking about tickling Tommy.” He paused for a minute in thought before looking back to the hybrid. “Say Techno, are you ticklish?”

Techno froze for a split second but tried to act natural. “I’m not ticklish. At least I don’t think so. You were saying?” He willed the ghost to simply forget what he’d admitted.

Ghostbur didn’t forget. “You think?” He questioned with a curious gaze.

“Yep.”

The younger man hummed in thought. Techno seemed like he wanted to be left alone, but he was intrigued at this point and tasered the man’s sides without a second thought.

Techno expected him to try and had attempted to ready himself for the oncoming sensation. He managed to stifle his reactions except for the physical twitch of his body. He cleared his throat, “See, not ticklish.”

“No wait, let me try again. Here, turn towards me.”

“I really don’t think that’s the best ide-“

“It is, I promise it is. Now turn”

The eldest sighed and turned as ordered. He was now looking up at Ghostbur, who kneeled in front of the man and set his hands on his sides before pausing.

“Just tell me if you really want me to stop, okay? But don’t worry, it should be fun.” The ghost said with a reassuring smile.

Techno had never been the best at eye contact, it was strangely intimate. His eyes shifted from the ground to his hands, only occasionally sneaking glances at his acquaintance.

The sensation was strange to say the least. Ghostbur was very gentle in general, it seemed to carry over to his touches as well. While it usually took more pressure to get any significant reactions from the warrior, tingles erupted from the areas the ghost touched.

He was unsure of if he should hold his reactions back. After all, he did have a reputation to keep up. But Ghostbur was so nice and whatever was going on with his hands definitely added onto the feeling.

Noticing the lack of response he was getting, Ghostbur moved his hands to now scribble a little firmer on the hybrid’s stomach.

The change was immediate. On Techno’s end, the feeling was stronger and more satisfying than it was before. It now drew huffs of laughter that bordered into titters when Ghostbur skimmed over a particularly bad spot. On Ghostbur’s end, he saw a small change, but it was all he needed. Now motivated with the knowledge that Technoblade was at least a little ticklish, he continued.

His hands drifted downwards to Techno’s hips as he kept up the firm yet gentle scribbling. As he got lower, Techno’s squirming became apparent and he let out slightly muffled titters. By the time Ghostbur’s hands made contact with Techno’s hips, the restricted laughter became more unfiltered.

“Ohohokay, you gohot me Ghohohostbur. You can stohop now.” Techno uncharacteristically giggled out. He didn’t want it to stop, but was unsure of what to do with himself at the moment.

Ghostbur slowed to a stop, not wanting to overstep but clearly disappointed. “We were just getting into it! Do I really have to stop?”

Techno was much better at masking his emotions than his companion and was able to seem somewhat nonchalant in his reply. “I guess you can keep goin’ if you want to. But you aren’t going to get much more than this.”

Whatever repressed embarrassment he felt was overshadowed by the look of pure excitement on Ghostbur’s face.

The excitement transpired into his touches as he went back to the man’s hips and tried squeezing instead. It worked like a charm, having caught him off guard. The shock caused Technoblade to fall onto his back, Ghostbur following suit and not being affected by the change in position. If anything, he had access to more exposed areas. He continued the light hearted assault of gentle squeezes, the grip on Techno’s hips keeping him pinned on his back.

The touches stayed the same, an unyielding flurry. Another consistency was the silence from Ghostbur, making Techno’s laughter the only sound. Even though he hadn’t been flustered by previous teasing, the silence seemed to have a completely different affect.

“SAHAhay sohomething!” Techno practically squawked out. He was surprised at the amount of strength Ghostbur had, he had no trouble holding the warrior in place.

Ghostbur honestly hadn’t meant to stay quiet at all, he simply got lost in thought and concentration. He couldn’t say he wasn’t pleased with the outcome, however, and couldn’t help but be a little smug.

“Like what?” Ghostbur asked. “Like how fun this is? I’m having so much fun with you, Technoblade! I think your laugh is as bright as the sun, and I’ve gotten pretty close to the sun, so I’d know.”

Ghostbur decided that getting to watch the normally stoic Technoblade hide his face and emit muffled giggles was one of his new favorite things. And it would definitely be worth whatever revenge was surely coming his way. As the idea of revenge came into his mind, he couldn’t help but lose some of the small ler mood he’d developed. But, there was still a chance to tire the piglin hybrid out enough to at least hold off revenge for the near future.

The ghost thought long and hard about how to tire him out without overdoing it and overstepping any unknown boundaries. He didn’t remember ever seeing Techno being tickled. But, he did recall seeing Phil scratch behind his ears, Techno leaned into the touch and smiled every time.

He noticed Techno starting to squirm more and being his hands near the ghost’s. Having no other bright ideas, he stopped the tickles on his hips, and brought his hands to the man’s ears. He began gently scratching behind them towards the base, similar to what he’d seen.

The reaction was small, but the ghost found it incredibly endearing. Techno leaned into the touch, as expected, his hands came to hold Ghostbur’s forearms but didn’t try to pull him away. Instead, he let out occasional huffs of air through his nose and grinned widely. His eyes closed and he closely resembled a happy cat.

Ghostbur repressed any verbal reactions as to not disturb Techno in such a vulnerable state. But when the man started to stur, he slipped a hand away from his ears and let it gently scratch around his stomach.

Now with gentle tickling on both his stomach and ear, Techno all but melted. The occasional huffs were replaced with much bouncier chuckles. The feelings were not overwhelming in the slightest for him, quite the opposite actually, as they left him feeling relaxed and wanting a nap.

Techno opened his eyes and looked at Ghostbur with a dazed but undeniably happy look on his face. Ghostbur had stopped the tickling earlier than he had planned, he recognized that he’d accidentally melted Techno before doing any real wrecking. But they were both satisfied.

Once Ghostbur had moved from his hips, Techno sat up. He looked to where he was previously laying and saw the smushed crops that would undoubtedly need to be replanted. He looked back to his friend, “I’m going to get you back for that in particular.” He teased light heartedly but there was no mistaking the statement for a lie.

Ghostbur gave a sheepish smile, “But not now though?” He questioned, not really minding either way.

“Nope. You’ll live to see tomorrow, maybe.” He shot his eyes back to the ghost at the last part with a playful glint in them. But his posture remained relaxed and there was still the nagging need for rest. He stood up and began making his way to his house. “I think I’m goin’ to go sleep now, thanks for that or whatever.”

Ghostbur scrambled to his feet as well and looked after the already walking hybrid. “Can I come too?” He called after him.

Techno gave a sarcastically exaggerated sigh and turned his head to look back as Ghostbur, “I suppose.” He let out another chuckle when Ghostbur cheered and ran up to join him at his side. Ghostbur had broken a barrier by the physical contact and the tension present in thier first moments together was long gone.

———————————————————————

I’m soft.

I also just finished state testing!!! Whoooo! In total, this past week I tested for about 11 hours...ouch. But I’m glad I got it done and I think I did pretty good!

Anyways, super sorry I let this sit in my inbox for so long, I just couldn’t think of what to put. I really like how this turned out though and I hope you do too! 💕💕

[little-mad]

Downsides of Thievery Pt. 13 (Final)

~ Previous Part ~

Gavin couldn’t stop himself from turning over his shoulder to look at Rael, who apparently had information about his theft from the alteon diplomat. Immediately, Gavin was suspicious. What information could Rael possibly have about something he hadn’t witnessed? Anything he knew that the Emperor wouldn’t already, would have to have come from Gavin himself… “Oh shit, he’s not really talking about that is he?”

What did Rael hope to gain in telling the Emperor that Gavin had been commissioned to steal from the diplomat? Was he just doing his duty as a soldier by divulging everything he knew? Or was there something more to it? When Gavin had first told Rael that he had been hired to steal the ring, he’d seemed surprised, but hadn’t expressed any desire to confess the truth. Then again, Gavin had already proven unable to read Rael.

“Very well, go ahead,” the Emperor prompted, hands folded on the table as he looked at Rael with interest.

Gavin stared back at his former captor, unable to take his eyes off the giant man. “While Gavin Stone chose not to disclose this to the public, in our time together he did reveal to me that he was in fact hired by a third party to burgle Lady Elyth,” Rael explained smoothly. “So while Gavin Stone did perform the actual deed, the idea was not his own.” His voice had the same formal, all business tone it’d had when Gavin first met him, and yet this time there was a vague hint of...was it desperation? No, it couldn’t be. Gavin had to be just imagining things at this point.

The Emperor gave an interested hum. “Intriguing,” he remarked before turning to look at Gavin. “Is this true?” he inquired.

While Gavin hadn’t been planning on explaining the full circumstances of the robbery to the Emperor, he wasn’t about to deny it now that Rael had done so. Lying at this point would only make him look more suspicious than he already did. “Yes, sir,” Gavin replied, hoping the honorific wasn’t an improper term to use with the Emperor.

The giant sovereign gave a nod of understanding. He took a long, thoughtful pause as he considered the new information before focusing back on Gavin. “Is there a reason you didn’t report this?” he asked, a serious look in those yellow eyes of his.

God, it was intimidating enough being stared at by a giant, but being stared at by a giant who ruled over an entire dimension of giants was just something else entirely. And Gavin had thought meeting Orlando Bloom at a music festival when he was seventeen had been daunting. Gavin swallowed. “Keep it together,” he ordered himself. If he wanted the Emperor to treat him like a person, it was possible he would need to earn his respect first.

“Sir, whether I was hired or not doesn’t change the fact that I committed the crime,” Gavin started. “And since I don’t know the real name of the man who hired me, I didn’t see a point in reporting it to authorities.” There was also the fact that Gavin had never really been one to snitch, especially on his fellow criminals, but he wasn’t about to say that part in a room with a soldier and a political leader.

“I see,” the Emperor responded pensively. “Well, I consider taking responsibility for your own actions to be quite noble,” he told Gavin with complete sincerity in his voice. “Truthfully, I never took Ashryn’s suggestion very seriously,” he admitted. “I’ve worked quite hard to develop a peaceful and friendly relationship with humankind, and I am not about to undo that by mistreating my first human convict.”

Gavin’s eyes widened. Did he hear that right? Did the Emperor really just, one after the other, call him noble and say that he wouldn’t lock him up in a display cage? It was hard for Gavin not to let a wave of relief crash over him. The news was great, but he still didn’t know what fate did await him. Not being treated like an animal really was the bare minimum after all.

“Um...so what are you planning to do with me?” Gavin found himself asking. He was sick and tired of the uncertainty, of not knowing what was in store for him. Whatever his sentence might be, he just wanted to know what it was already so he could start figuring out how to cope with it.

The Emperor’s eyebrows lifted slightly. He seemed somewhat taken aback by Gavin’s abrupt question. It was possible the man wasn’t accustomed to being spoken to that way. Gavin hoped he hadn’t done something taboo. He wasn’t intending to be disrespectful, he just really didn’t know how to interact with literal royalty.

Apparently, the Emperor wasn’t too upset, because a small smile had taken form on his face. “Well,” he began, glancing back at Rael. “I find myself quite fascinated by your willingness to speak up in front of me in order to defend this human.”

“Is that what he did?” Gavin asked himself. Had Rael really been standing up for him? Was it really more than him just doing his job?

“You were aware that many important figures have negative opinions of Gavin Stone, and yet you risked your reputation by speaking up for him,” the Emperor went on.

Suddenly everything was beginning to make a lot more sense. The whole scene out in the hallway...it had been all about Rael protecting his reputation. He couldn’t choose a human over an alteon, lest he risk being looked down upon by his peers. Of course, none of that made what he’d done okay, but at least Gavin understood why now. “Does this mean he had some kind of change of heart...is that why he told the Emperor about me being hired…?” he pondered to himself.

The Emperor’s gaze suddenly returned to Gavin. “I believe I have decided what your sentence will be,” he announced firmly, a satisfied smile on his face that Gavin wasn’t sure how to take. “Since the two of you have clearly established the foundations of a relationship, I have decided that, in order to atone for your crime, you will serve under Rael as an assistant for a minimum of one year.”

Gavin’s mouth fell open, but before he could even form a coherent thought, he heard Rael’s stunned voice exclaim from behind him, “What?!”

-

The word had slipped from Rael’s mouth before he could stop it. He had just been so shocked by the Emperor’s announcement that all thoughts of propriety and manners suddenly flew out the window. “Sorry, your majesty,” he quickly recovered. “I just--I wasn’t expecting that.”

Take a human on as an assistant?! It was completely unheard of--of course it was unheard of, humans were tiny people who lived in another realm, why would one ever serve as an assistant to a common alteon soldier? Rael didn’t even know what to think. The Emperor clearly trusted him enough to put Gavin in his ward, but what the hell was Rael supposed to do with a diminutive person tagging along with him while he worked? Plus there was the matter of he and Gavin’s last encounter. Something told Rael the human didn’t much want to hang around with the person who had threatened him not once, but twice within a few hours.

“I’m aware that it’s unorthodox, but to be frank, this entire situation is unorthodox,” the Emperor stated. “This way, Gavin Stone will be able to serve his punishment while learning about and experiencing our realm.” It seemed the relationship between alteons and humans was even more important to the Emperor than Rael had realized--he was completely breaking away from the norm for the sake of diplomacy.

“Are you sure it won’t be too dangerous?” Rael had to ask. On a regular basis, his job wasn’t typically overly treacherous, but even the mildest thing to him could be potentially life threatening to someone as small as Gavin.

The Emperor offered a gentle smile. “I’m certain Gavin Stone will be quite safe in your hands, Rael.” It was easy for him to say that, he didn’t know what Rael had done just ten minutes prior--if he did, he would probably never let Gavin within a hundred feet of the temper-prone excuse for an Imperial Guard soldier.

“Uh--excuse me, sir,” Gavin piped up nervously. He was facing towards the Emperor, so Rael couldn’t see his facial expression. Honestly, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to see it. “What exactly can someone like me do as an assistant?” the human inquired, voicing the question that Rael had been pondering.

“You will do whatever Rael requests of you,” the Emperor told him simply, then turning to Rael said, “You may utilize him as your assistant how you see fit, so long as he isn’t put in significant danger of course.” Rael couldn’t believe how much faith the Emperor seemingly had in him. Where did it come from? This was by far the longest interaction he’d ever had with the ruler of Iaela, so why did he seem to trust a random soldier so much? “I’ll have some furniture and attire made up to suit a human. You are also free to request any accommodations you think you may need,” the Emperor added, already scrawling down notes on a sheet of parchment.

Rael opened his mouth, but he had nothing to say. He just couldn’t believe this was actually happening. He’d gone from disliking humans to being made the guardian of one in a matter of hours. He still wasn’t sure about his opinion on humanity as a whole, but he couldn’t deny the fact that one particular human had penetrated the tough exterior he had built around himself.

Like it or not, Rael cared about Gavin. He never would have spoken up to the Emperor if he hadn’t. As strange and inexplicable as it may be, he needed to accept the reality of the situation. Gavin would be his ward for at least a year. They would be spending a lot of time with each other. Rael couldn’t keep pretending to be indifferent to the tiny man.

~

After being dismissed from the meeting with the Emperor, Gavin had been carried off by Rael, taken to what he could only assume was Rael’s quarters. The entire trip there had been silent, because what the hell was Gavin supposed to say? He was so mentally and emotionally confused at this point that he couldn’t even begin to make sense of anything.

Rael’s room was small and simple; it contained only a bed, side table, and little chest of drawers. On the way in, Gavin had noticed the hallway had been filled with doors, which led him to believe this area was entirely made up of the rooms of soldiers. At least Rael had his own space, the last thing Gavin needed at the moment was to be faced with more alteons.

“Gavin,” Rael spoke up, finally breaking the silence that had stretched out between the two of them. “I know you’re probably not pleased with this arrangement.” Gavin stared up at Rael from where he stood on the bedside table. The giant was sitting on his bed, but of course, he was still looming high over the human. “I...I understand why you would feel that way,” Rael’s voice was uncharacteristically hesitant, Gavin could hardly believe this was the same person who had yelled at him earlier.

A long sigh blew out from between Gavin’s lips. “I sure hope you’re leading up to an apology here,” he snipped, folding his arms firmly over his chest. He wasn’t going to put up with some indirect expression of regret, nah--that wasn’t going to fly. If Rael wanted his forgiveness, he would have to make an apology as clear and plain as day.

There was no derision or amusement on Rael’s face, just a solemn frown. “Ashryn wanted me to prove myself by...reigning you in,” the alteon explained in a stormy tone. “I was too afraid of harming my reputation to not take the bait.” Clearly Gavin’s assumptions had been right. “But I was wrong...and weak for not standing up to Ashryn. For that, I am sorry.” It was hard to believe Gavin was hearing those words being directed at him from Rael. A few hours ago it would have seemed impossible.

As good as it was to hear the apology, Gavin still felt like there was something Rael wasn’t entirely grasping. “Listen, I know I look pretty tough, but you’ve gotta realize how--how freaky it is when you use your size against me.” Admitting he was afraid wasn’t really something Gavin loved to do, especially considering he was trying to convince alteons that humans weren’t weak little babies, but Rael needed to know the effect his actions had.

The size disparity between the room’s occupants suddenly became even more strikingly apparent. Gavin was standing and Rael was sitting, and yet Rael still absolutely towered over the human. No matter how equal the two may be intellectually, Rael would always have a huge automatic advantage over Gavin--and that was something they would both have to come to adapt to if they were going to be living and working with each other for the foreseeable future.

“Are you afraid of me?” The sudden question stunned Gavin. He wasn’t sure why, because it had always been something in the back of his mind. Maybe it was just shocking hearing Rael ask it so bluntly.

Gavin paused. How was he supposed to answer this? He had definitely had fear inflicted on him by Rael on multiple occasions, but was he really and truly afraid of the guy? Gavin gave a weak shrug. “I don’t really know...I guess sometimes…” Rael gave a tight nod, as if he had been expecting that response. “But other times you’re just a big, awkward dork,” Gavin quickly added.

A very slight smile pulled at the corner of Rael’s lips. “Alright, I’ll promise not to use my size against you anymore, if you can promise not to call me a ‘dork’ again,” he said the words so seriously, and yet the growing grin on the alteon’s face gave him away.

Gavin chuckled. “Fine, but you gotta promise not to give me any weird assistant jobs, like polishing your scabbard or some shit.” He really didn’t know how much someone of his size could really be of use to a giant, but he supposed this arrangement was better than being thrown into a cage.

Rael raised a single dark eyebrow. “Oh, but you’re probably the only one that could actually reach the inside.”

A grumpy frown took shape on Gavin’s face. “Okay, next rule: no size jokes at my expense!”

A warm, genuine laugh escaped from Rael. In a flash the giant man was reaching forward, and before Gavin could dodge backwards, a massive index finger was ruffling his hair, making the already messy locks even more of a disaster. “No promises.”

Gavin let out a long sigh. Somehow he had gone from being a professional thief to the assistant to a gigantic, elf-eared man from another dimension. “At least it’s more exciting than being a damn doctor.”

I was originally gonna make this two parts but I decided to just make it one big chunky final chapter! This story was kind of like the introductory prologue to Gavin and Rael so there's definitely room for more about them in the future if people are interested. I had a ton of fun writing this and totally appreciate all the nice comments and such that I got!

I've got a busy few weeks ahead of me but feel free to send in prompts/commissions for my ocs. I just may take a little while to actually get to them.

[anolyso]

Utena thoughts...about 2 weeks later

I've been putting it off for way too long and so most of my thoughts stopped being fresh. On top of watching way too many analysis vids post-watch, but still I do at least want to put my 2cents of Revolutionary Girl Utena out there for the world.

Utena is perhaps one of the most famous "magical girl"/shoujo action shows out there for not only it's transgressive themes of relationship abuse and low-key pretty much being the poster girl for like actual feminist perspective on/in anime...but also just doing it all in both a heavily allegorical and understated, yet super over-the-top stylish fashion

But that's it's reputation preceding itself, is Utena worth while all these years? The answer is Yes, but it also really shows it's age and budget in pacing and repetition, tho as an appreciator for "behind the scenes" compromises in art, it's more showcasing Ikuhara's talent in working around both taboo and long-form budget constraints with just well-thought out and iconic imagery that - while episodic and formulaic - is just very good at filling the 39 eps with feasts for the eyes.

Utena broadly is about tomboy Utena with memories long ago after her parents died being "saved" by a princely figure like a princess...except she's so enthralled by the nostalgia that instead she becomes a full on Prince herself and receives a dueling ring to fight in the Ohtori Acadamy secret duels for "engagement" to Rose Bride Himemiya Anthy.

Utena is divided between 4 arcs, only the first and last being Manga adapted from hearsay:

1: Student Council Saga

2: Black Rose Saga

3: Akio Ohtori Saga

4: Apocalypse

From back to forth I'd say that Akio + Apoc is more just escalation into the finale while Black Rose being anime original comes off as a glorified side-character study which while complementing the secondary cast, feels like one of those Anime movies that has to say "but if you don't watch this part, it's pretty much optional for the main plot" despite it also actually introducing the most important antagonist within it's margins.

More importantly, it's the Student Council (arc and the actual people) that lay the foundation but also a large part of the show's focus which ironically puts Utena in the background until like almost the finale and some in-between developments, so it's less "Utena (and Anthy Himemiya)'s story" until the very end, but more like a showcase of how fucked up the system at large is (pin in that).

By the Council themselves is:

Kyouichi Saionji: The biggest jobber, like actually introduced as the most despicable loser ep 1 and proceeds to be a complete arrogant joke for the rest of the show. Honestly in another shojo "love" story, they'd find some way to redeem him but semi-compellingly they turn him into like an Aqua-lad type pathetic brat with an inferiority complex to the actual Student head

Miki Kaoru: the naive "nice, non-threatening soft boy" that also just never actually listens to the girls around him. Probably adds more complexity to the whole patriarchal idea on analytic reflection since yeah, the whole "nice guy finishes last" plays up better when the kid comes off as that "ally" energy of wanting to save Himemiya from being the Rose Bride but also low-key won't actually not just do the duels and win her cuz he's that sorta wishy-washy hypocrite. Arguably the least hateable guy in the cast (minus mascot Chu-Chu)

Juri Arisugawa: TRAGIC LESBIAN TRIANGLE LOVE. Probably the biggest point to of both "not-explicitly homosexual" but also really freaking obvious since her entire story is her girlfriend stealing her "boy crush" when actually she was crushing on her and being pretty much frustrated throughout her story as pining most of it. It's quaint by today's standards but also like damn girl, get over her she was like the worst back stabbing bitch (literally if Black Rose counts)

Nanami Kiryuu: SPEAKING OF QUEEN BITCH, it's been a long time since I've watched a High School girl bully and honestly it's kinda refreshing. If Miki is "soft-boy uwu" Nanami is a brat that gets her come-uppance often, featured prominently as an anime only with the MOST filler/comedic episodes but also not low-key, being the most out-spoken actual brother complex ironically spins perhaps the biggest twist and ironic relationships of "I love my brother but not-like-that but also like-that" by the end. Mostly comedic relief but I find her inclusion to actually add a lot more to juxtapose...

Touga Kiryuu: Big Student Council Prez himself, the first arc antagonist and also a strong foil to Saionji and later a stepping stone for Akio. Touga is THE image of a Princely Playboy Heart-Throb that in any other Shoujo romance would have the main girl win him over from all those "other girls" despite him being apathetic if not outright manipulative of them. Good thing Utena is better than that and really puts a spotlight on just not-actually-ok his power hunger for "the power to bring the world revolution" that leads him to heavily objectify Anthy, arguably even more than Misogynist Trophy Girlfriend beater Saionji, since he doesn't even see her as more than a means to an end despite professing and looking the Prince part but lacking all the actual virtues.

The Student council matters more since they're characters and subsequent tragic flaws are the ACTUAL meat of the show and on second rumination actual shows more how fucked up the system/gender dynamic/power hierarchy is since - while it blatantly fucks over Juri who can't just outright say who she likes - also show almost it's own sub-text of Masculine failings: Saionji desperately clinging to being TOXIC MASCULINE™ and completely falling short underneath Touga; Miki's "nice boy" act belying him trying to replace his low-key nostalgia for his sister (also a bitch, but apparently was more like Nanami in the manga); and best yet Touga being the quintessential "Prince in all but actual behavior" by emulating a cutthroat and Machiavellian world view but coming up empty because well, he's just an illusion of a prince...but that leads in way more to the big finale piece where I'll reintroduce the actual story's main trio

Utena Tenjou: Tomboy Prince with brain empty except for lesbian thoughts. Honestly probably what every western "STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN" archetype wishes they were since while having very tomboyish personality in athletics, blunt speaking and also VERY oblivious to the actual plot for REAL DRAMATIC IRONY, but also never actually demeaning her being feminine partially due to her love of an childhood prince and how she maintains her relationship with both her friend Wakaba and later Anthy. Honestly mostly a plot device after S1 until she gets ACTUAL development by the very end and instead kinda bumbles her way into undoing the entire REVOLUTION OF THE WORLD. I kinda wish she felt either more cognizant or at least felt like she was developing/properly rebuking the rest of the cast's power obsessions but I guess that's for the movie.

Anthy Himemiya: Actual Trophy Wife with a dark secret (darker than ski- wait no that's terrible scratch that). Set-up very much as an immediate princess in distress while also being the most femme Yamato Nadeshiko, Anthy being the Rose Bride as a literal prize who acts and behaves as whom she's "engaged" with desires while otherwise being quiet, wry, mysterious and noticably submissive, by the end it actually plays up into THE BIG REVEALS of just how abused she's been into a hopeless acceptance...like y'know actual abuse victims.

Akio Ohtori: Grade A Antagonist, probably the most insidious I've seen a villain in a while, Akio is notable for, back in 1997, being perhaps the big go-to of actual deconstructing the facade of a whole shoujo genre's "hots for a teacher/sexy man putting the moves" and highlighting how actually exploitative and abusive a person like that really is. Being Himemiya's brother (somewhat justified in the manga by both being a weird Sailor Moon-esque reincarnation of gods/godesses of Dios), despite how much of his motives are runing the background and how the entire back story is  uh...brought up in like barely in the last arc with little lead up (some scenes feel like they'd be a full melodrama season and they just have like 1 scene in the final arc episodes) he manages to one-up Touga (in the plot as well) by instead of "just" objectifying girls, not-just-flat out saying Utena looks best as a princess, but y'know the fact that he is implicitly yet constantly exploiting and victim-blaming Anthy for her own suffering for "the power of Dios/Revolution of the world" turns it on its head

I've spent all this time on characters but in truth a lot of the meat of the show relies again on the Council Members fleshing out the issues of system leading to outright divorcing "being a Prince" (heroic altruistic virtues) and "being a man" (considering like all but maybe the comedic relief have some deliberately misogynistic behavior) and beyond just the plot (or rather character) synopsis, the talent goes far more in how it's framed, the symbolic/allegorical shots, the repetition adding a good episode formula flow to character showcases, probably the most "tasteful" allusion to uh...*ahem* sexual abuse that so many other edgier/prentious shows fumble. Both in how intimidating yet understated it's foreshadowing is until they hard-reveal it despite never explicitly naming it even tho it sends Nanami into hysterics

Really it's both a massive blessing and reason for it's cult beloved status for it's aesthetics but also it's burden, for being a full 39 episodic season by season character development study of everyone BUT the main trio except for snippets and the very end that makes it greatly appreciable as a legitimate work of art.

What I wanted more to say however (long overdue) is that a large part of following is, visibly at least, western feminist critiques and yes while it almost seems like Utena fits the "deconstructing patriarchy" story like a glove...it's weird how almost none of them actually can give a good historical account of actual Japanese female/gender/sexuality norms nor Anime contemporaries actually were. Like Tenchi Muyo and Berserk came out the same year (Cardcaptor Sakura the next) and despite how you can "feel" the influence in lots of modern shows like SHAFT's signature visual imagery cuts or many WESETERN shows having straight scene references to Utena....almost no one has a similar feel to Utena until like Princess Tutu comes out.

Really tho probably should've watched Utena and then Tutu because while it's undeniable that Utena is a major pillar of shoujo re-codification - what with everyone before Utena was saying they thought it'd be like a Rose of Versaille or Lady Knight rip-off...whose laughing now? - it's almost like there's a missing link between it and it's major western fanbase (probably with what few anime did get overseas, this one probably rose to the top), or how very noticeable there IS an influence on it's genre in Japan

Almost none of the big analyst fans actually know A) it's not "a deconstruction of Magical Girls" since despite Ikuhara working on Sailor Moon just before this, almost none of the tropes line up and instead more with Shoujo genre as a whole. or  one of the major inspirations was Takarazuka theater.

And this is not to dismiss how inspirational it is to it's western fandom, but while I am notably cynical towards placing things on pedestals, there's probably something about cultivating the whole pop-culture feminist reading commune with people making weird time-loop theories while kinda most of it is just filling in a mad-lib mostly thanks to Ikuhara just keeping things on the vague and letting the audience take away their own perspective.

Again, most of the show is completely sub-textual or visually/symbolically depicted and never stated nor properly defines it's weird key words (End of the World, Revolutionize the World, Power of Dios, Rose Bride, all things said constantly but never really said what they "mean". But that's also perhaps its charm, in it's allegory and very Death of the Author approach, it has definitely allowed it's fan theorizing and appreciation to flourish so there's something there for that.

Ultimately I'd say Utena the TV series is great more so for what it isn't...or rather I should say it's great for not just subverting Shoujo tropes and archetypes for the Japanese audience but also that despite dealing with some very serious and heavy subjects in obtuse and perhaps understated ways for the time, people have allowed it to be put on it's pedestal because they can easily fit it in themselves.

Honestly though, not that a more "straight forward" approach wouldn't detract from Utena but I will say that the movie, Adolescence of Utena, is very much the best encapsulation of what Utena strives to be (for another big blog post) and while the TV series has plenty of time and flexes it's directorial muscles with budget constraints and season pacing UNrestrained, the movie will trim a lot of the fat

[thephantomessoftheopera]

Notes on Gaston Leroux’ “The Phantom of the Opera” - Chapter 6: “The Enchanted Violin”

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Artwork by @coatntails on deviantart

“The Enchanted Violin” introduces us to the childhood friendship of Raoul and Christine - but first, we learn that Christine did not continue to triumph at the Opera, but only sang once more in society at the invitation of the Duchess of Zurich and, after that, cancelled everything including a charity concert. She was apparently terrified by her triumph during the gala night, and didn’t “recognize herself” anymore when she sings. Before, she was emotionally distant and indifferent because she had shut everything out so she could cope with the grief of her father’s death. The amount of passion and feeling that Erik’s lessons had to rekindle in her must have felt terrifying and perhaps even painful to her. Plus, baring your heart and soul on stage like she did is, by itself, something that can indeed feel terrifying! In this chapter, we learn that Raoul has indeed been watching her performances at the Opera for some time, but also felt that she seemed indifferent to everything and everyone - until her soul finally came alive again with her gala night performance.

Philippe de Chagny has even tried to further her career with the managers to please his little brother, but Christine does not wish for him to do so. Raoul tries to seek her out, but without success. One morning though, Raoul receives a letter from Christine, assuring him that she has not forgotten the “little boy who fetched her scarf from the sea”, and informing him that she will be going to Perros-Guirec to visit her father’s grave on the anniversary of his death. Perros-Guirec is a seaside village in Brittany, quite far from Paris.

Raoul doesn’t lose time and rushes to the Montparnasse station to follow her, but fails to catch the morning train and has to wait all day for the night train (Raoul tends to have a bit of bad luck following him around).

This chapter also gives us a short biography of Christine Daaé. In the novel - contrary to the musical - she is described as blonde and blue-eyed, slender and somewhat short-sighted, which would presumably give her a bit of a dreamy, unfocused expression if nobody hands her a pair of glasses (I guess Erik wouldn’t mind her short-sightedness either!). She was born in the village of Skotelof near Uppsala in Sweden. Her father (who does not have a name in the novel) sang in the church choir and taught Christine to read music before she could read books. He also had a well-known reputation as the best violinist in Scandinavia, and was often requested to play at social gatherings. Christine’s mother died when she was 6 years old, and her father became a travelling musician and took Christine around the country. They were discovered by Professor Valerius and taken to Götheburg, where Christine received her training. His wife, Mama Valerius, treated Christine like a daughter. When the Valerius family moved to France, Christine and her father accompanied them. Papa Daaé did not adjust well to life in Paris though, and often found solace in his music only, locking himself in his room for hours at a time. The only time of the year he enjoyed was their yearly trip to the seaside town of Perros-Guirec, because the ocean reminded him of his native Sweden. Missing his nomadic lifestyle, he decided to once again to spend some time every year as a travelling musician with Christine - which is how Christine came to meet Raoul, who was then staying with his aunt - the one that kindled his love for the sea. Raoul heard Christine sing and was so utterly captivated by her angel’s voice that he started following her around with his governess. One day, at the bay of Trestraou, the wind was so strong that it blew Christine’s scarf into the sea, and Raoul ran after it fully clothed and rescued it. They became friends that summer and played together often, and Christine’s father also gave him some violin lessons.

Bay of Trestraou, where Raoul rescued Christine’s scarf from the sea (image from france-voyage.com)

Both Raoul and Christine loved listening to ancient tales and legends, especially the ones that Papa Daaé told them. Among those stories is the famous “Little Lotte”, who loved listening to the Angel of Music while she fell asleep. It’s a little funny that while they listen to the story, all Raoul does is look at Christine’s golden hair and blue eyes, imagining her as “Little Lotte”, and Christine’s thoughts are focused on how lucky Little Lotte was to hear the Angel of Music. So Raoul dreams about Christine while Christine dreams about the Angel of Music, which kind of foreshadows the setup of the love triangle in the novel.

To be honest, I can’t really blame Christine for thinking she was indeed hearing the Angel of Music in her dressing-room, since the description given fits Erik perfectly:

“No one ever saw him, but he made himself heard to those predestined to hear him. It often happened when they least expected it, when they were sad and disheartened. Then they suddenly heard heavenly harmonies and a divine voice, and they would remember it all their lives. People visited by the angel were left with a kind of flame burning inside them.”

I guess her father couldn’t really find the Angel of Music in heaven, so he sent her the next best thing that was available… Erik might not have been a heavenly angel, but the effect he had on her amounted to the same that is attributed to the Angel of Music in her father’s stories.

After their parting following the first summer that they spent together, Christine and Raoul saw each other again three years later, when they were “no longer children” - perhaps 13 to 14 years old, which would put their first meeting at about age 10 to 11. Professor Valerius has died in the meantime, and Christine’s father has started suffering from a cough. Raoul and Christine’s meeting is a little awkward this time - both seem to be developing tender feelings for each other, but are also very reserved. Their current relationship has now outgrown the sweet and carefree friendship of childhood. Raoul is quite infatuated with her, but he is also badly affected by his jealousy plus the unresolved issue of a peasant girl like Christine not being a suitable choice as a wife for a Viscount - and Christine being acutely aware of that. So yes - it’s complicated between those two. Afterwards, she tries to forget him and dedicate herself to her career instead. But when her father finally dies, her soul and her voice die with him, and even though her talent is still enough to gain entry into the Paris Conservatory, she cannot not bring any more enthusiasm to her studies, and just goes through the motions to please Mama Valerius.

Christine apparently travelled to Perros by herself, staying at the “Auberge du Soleil Couchant”. Raoul is looking forward to speaking to her alone without interference. Despite having sailed around the world, Leroux describes Raoul as “pure as a virgin” and overwhelmed by his love for Christine, who occupies his every thought - in fact, Raoul seems to obsess over things a lot in the novel, not just about Christine. When he finally meets her as she returns from mass, he jumps straight to the point and tells her that he loves her and cannot live without her - which is unfortunately not “what she wanted to hear”. Their conversation goes totally wrong and as his jealous temper gets the better of him, he behaves terribly and they get into a fight (over Erik, of course) to the point where she runs off and locks herself in her room.

Raoul, saddened by the way his meeting with Christine turned out, wanders off towards the graveyard to pray for Christine’s father, and finally sits down, looking out over the moor where he and Christine used to look for goblins when they were children. He never saw any, while Christine always saw lots despite her lack of proper eyesight - which shows that despite both of them being described as “dreamy”, Christine’s imagination is a lot more lively than Raoul’s. She finally comes out to make another try of confiding the secret of the Angel of Music who speaks to her to Raoul, but when she feels he doesn’t take her seriously and questions her virtue, she storms off again, truly angry this time and refusing to come down for dinner.

At night, about 11:30 pm, she finally sneaks out to visit her father’s grave at the Perros graveyard and meet the “Angel of Music” (aka Erik) there. This is obviously the scene which inspired “Wishing you were somehow here again”, though the original context is a little bit different. Raoul climbs out the window and follows her to the graveyard. Raoul’s account of the graveyard scene is given via a transcript of Raoul’s testimony to Commissary Mifroid a few weeks later, after Christine’s abduction. The use of this “source” is one of the things that have given rise to the theory that this is a “detective novel”, however Leroux uses it more like a historian would use a source - it’s just one of different documents that he uses (or claims to use) to prove that his story is indeed true.

Christine doesn’t notice Raoul following her. Her rendez-vous with the Angel of Music is supposedly taking place at exactly midnight at her father’s grave, so Christine is in a bit of a hurry to get there in time. It is still winter, so the graves are covered in snow and lit by the clear moonlight. Christine, who apparently has nerves of steel since she has no qualms about going to graveyards at midnight and then sitting down calmly next to a pile of actual skulls and bones, kneels down to pray when divinely beautiful violin music is suddenly heard, but no player is seen anywhere. The sounds of the piece,  the “Resurrection of Lazarus” are so enthralling that Raoul himself is reminded of the legend of the Angel of Music.

When the music finally ceases, Raoul hears a sound from the pile of bones, and assumes that the invisible musician might be hiding there. Christine leaves, and suddenly the skulls start rolling towards Raoul, and he sees a shadow enter the church. He chases after him and manages to grab his cloak, and when the shadow turns around, he sees a terrifying death’s-head with burning eyes which shocks him so much that he faints. I assume that Erik was not wearing a mask here, and that his unmasked face was weapon enough to take Raoul out without any further need for fireballs or swordfights.

The next morning, Raoul is found half-frozen in the little church, and Christine and the landlady of the Inn both take care to revive him.

Historic images of Perros-Guirec from phantomstheater.weebly.com

Artwork by CoatNTails on deviantart

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