#also for the love of god i need those people to stop calling our ship ‘ollycest’ 😭😭

[ollyou]

(Probably doesn’t need much of a warning but I wouldn’t suggest reading this if selfcest makes you uncomfortable)

Honestly being on Twitter longer and not confining myself to consuming one fandom’s content has surprisingly made me feel a lot better about me and my fp’s ship. Like I lived a life thinking “haha yeah, selfcest is funny”, then having my fp decide “haha yeah, selfcest is funny so I’m making a comic of our ollys kissing”, which was such a silly joke 😭 Obviously this became a source of comfort for both of us because it’s something that’s almost been a thing for three whole years(!!) and the joke suddenly had lore.

Then of course… those people came along. People I’ve mentioned in the past; people who have tried to ruin my life and make me out to be disgusting simply because I ship a non-canon King Olly interpretation with an alternate universe version of himself. People who lied about the ship to make it seem bad, pretending it was between a 21 and 17 year old (haha, it’s not and never has been— they’re both around 17-18 in range). It made me question, “Is it really that bad to like something harmless and impossible in real life simply because some jerks online are purposefully interpreting it as harmful?”.

I’ve seen a lot on Twitter. I don’t really like using the term “selfcest” regularly unless in a joking context, and I do think it needs a name change to not cause confusion, but I’ve actually seen… a majority of people don’t think it’s problematic. I’ve seen a lot of tweets with lots of likes from people who vehemently hate proshippers telling the world that selfcest isn’t proship and it’s not bad at all. Lots of people being educated on the meaning of the word and how it’s not problematic because it’s only self love and impossible in real life. Hell, even with the release of Fionna and Cake, the Adventure Time spinoff series, a whole new popular ship that counts as selfcest rose up, and with it, a lot of people who defend the trope with their life.

I wouldn’t say I’m into selfcest. I have a ship with my fp that’s by definition selfcest, but one ship doesn’t mean you have a fetish or anything. I just think it’s otherwise funny. It’s probably one of the most harmless shipping tropes out there, as bold of a statement that may be (exceptions being the usual bad stuff, like minor x adult age gap, or sexual content between minors). In fact, did you know autosexuality is a thing? It’s a sexual/romantic orientation on the asexual spectrum that refers to an attraction to oneself, and is a very real and valid thing. Sometimes I wonder how these people would feel if they knew about that identity— would they reject it because they think attraction to yourself is somehow inherently incestuous, or would they accept it, but reject the fantasies autosexual folks may project onto fictional characters that cannot be harmed like real people?

I’ve actually identified as autosexual in the past. I saw quite a lot of people making fun of it online back then, so I kind of silently took back that label, but all I’ve seen super recently almost makes me a bit more comfortable publicly identifying with it. It’s nothing that hurts anyone, because what you do with yourself alone, provided you’re in the right state of mind, will always be consensual, and brings no one else into the equation. Maybe someone will feel rejected if one were to say “Sorry, I like myself more”, but is that really our biggest issue? Is that anything truly “problematic”?

It’s not— it’s harmless, and always will be. And it makes me happy to see the majority of people agree.

What would I do without my 450+ image album of my fp alone’s art of our Ollys, anyway?

[max-will-one-day-be-okay]

Good Omens 2

So I finished the season, and I must say that it has some of the best writing I've ever seen. (spoilers ahead)

Already, I've noticed people upset with the ending. And while I do understand, I think that it was perfect. Not as an ending to their story, of course, but to continue the story.

Aziraphale still fully believes that Heaven is undoubtedly good. That him being in charge might fix things. He hasn't gotten to the point that Crowly has in his disillusionment.

To get to a point where they could truly be on their own side- one where Crowly doesn't have to worry about Aziraphale constantly backtracking and Aziraphale feels like he can fully trust Crowly- Aziraphale has to learn the hard way that heaven isn't perfect. That God isn't perfect. I'm assuming that's whats planned for next season.

Plus we kind of already saw what their ending would have been like if it were to happen in this season. I didn't think I shipped Gabriel and Beelzebub but here I am. I support this. They're adorable. I did not know how much I could adore those two until this season.

Nina and Maggie have my heart. Their story was so much fun, and when Nina called Maggie 'Angel' at the end I was gone. I want to see that they're getting married next season and I want them to be happy forever. Beautiful ladies.

Muriel is my favorite Good Omens character now full stop. So lovable and trying so hard, it's no doubt that both Crowly and Aziraphale seemed to also adore them. They're just a little guy, and I couldn't love them more.

While the writers/actors strike has put the continuation of the show in limbo, it just means that we need to hassle the corporations to pay their writers and actors fairly for a shot to see the ending.

And even if the worst happens and we don't get a season 3, there are some pretty talented writers out there. I have faith that if needed, we as a fandom can come up with our own satisfying conclusion. Maybe one with a kiss that doesn't rip out my heart and stomp on it until I'm sobbing and holding my cat close muttering nonsense on tumblr.

[fireemblems24]

Azure Gleam Ch 12

It shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone that this is, by far, my favorite route. Spoilers below.

MAIN STORY

I forgot we had Claude on our "side" here.

Oh, here comes Byleth. This is AG's chapter for Byleth, right? And ugh, this time I need to actually recruit Byleth or else someone I love will die bc someone from Faerghus will die.

Oh, there's Randolph. Ready to die again. I swear to God this man is allergic to life.

He's hiring Jeralt, so yeah, this is the recruit Byleth chapter.

Adrestian nobles are real peaches. They're burning villages and looting, or a good handful of them are. I swear they have the worst nobility. Only Faerghus Western lords rival them.

If Randolph dies, than Jeralt's contract is terminated. So that means I have to trade Randolph for Jeralt and Byleth? Deal.

Man, that mint hair is a CHOICE. Whyyyyy. The darker blue hair is much better.

I like Byleth more after Hopes. I liked Byleth before, but Hopes has helped me see the characterization easier. It also makes the whole "one man army"/Ashen Demon seem more real.

And yep here's the sword again from the other routes.

I'm just so happy they gave Felix the high ponytail look.

Time to make Adrestia sweat.

Jeralt scars the Blue Lions way more than Randolph.

Leave it to Sylvain to strategize. Haha, Rodrigue says Sylvain reminds him of his dad, Sylvain isn't sure if that's a compliment.

I love how much you can tell all these people have known each other for so long.

OMG, there's so many side battles.

ANNETTE & FELIX B

Weird to only give them on support and it's only B given how popular their ship is.

Another support about Annette's songs lol. They really increased that in this game, but it's adorable so I'm good.

Dorothea and the church are performing operas for Faerghus.

Annette's "opera" song is about taking a hot bath when she's already hot. Felix is impressed with her mental fortitude. Lol.

Annette's flustered because it's supposed to be serious, not about bathing lol.

They basically set up a date to go see an opera together.

YURI & SHEZ C

I saw this in another route already (but forgot), so I unlocked it here too! But not going to write about it twice.

YURI & SYLVAIN B

These two rooted out spies together. Well, mostly Yuri lol.

Yuri's impressed with Sylvain's layers.

Neither of them are going to let Dimitri know what they're up to until after it's done lol.

Yuri's earned Sylvain's trust, but still threatens Yuri if he switches sides.

Yuri calls Sylvain out for being super loyal, which, yes, he is and that's often so overlooked part of his character.

Wait . . . Sylvain hit on Yuri with a bad pickup line? Lamo.

Sylvain mistook Yuri for a girl. Yuri is going to blackmail Sylvain with his back pickup lines for life lamo.

Yuri's open to a date with Sylvain though. Sylvain is into Yuri's flirting.

That would be a nightmare couple.

MERCEDES & SHEZ A

Mercedes looks at the little things and it reminds her of what it was like before the war - like tea parties with Shez and kids determined to get stronger.

Mercedes hates the war and wishes she could go back to those days. Getting really sentimental.

Mercedes used to just accept whatever happened and didn't realize how much she valued the past until peace got destroyed.

I had Shez be nice and tell Mercie that it's ok to get sentimental.

Mercie was happy with that.

Shez says she's always there to listen to Mercedes if she needs it.

So Mercie's like, let's tea party now! She bought new ingredients.

DEDUE & FELIX B

Their only support

Ohhh, Dimitri's in it too. They're talking strategy. Dimitri wants a head-on approach, Felix wants a sneaky one, Dedue withholds his opinion.

Dimitri tells Felix to stop pestering Dedue lamo.

Dimitri wants to head the mission, but Felix is like no, let me. Strategy resolved and Felix confronts Dedue.

Dedue values Felix's input and recognizes his unique role with Dimitri.

Dedue just stays amused the whole time and doesn't let Felix get to him.

Felix will not spit it out that he's so worried about Dimitri.

Dimitri returns and is about to tell Dimitri what went on but Felix cuts him off, which I'm sure just amuses Dedue.

I love how it's pretty much cannon that the vast majority of the cast never take Felix seriously when he's spouting his tsundere.

INGRID & MARIANNE C

MY HORSE GIRLS GET A SUPPORT CHAIN!!!!

OMG I'm so happy with this.

Ingrid's worried because her horse didn't eat all the feed. Marianne recommends hay and explains why.

Ingrid is happy and compliments Marianne, who of course downplays it and tries to get out of Ingrid asking more questions (likely about horses).

Of course, later Marianne tells Ingrid her horse (or pegasus?) is probably scared after acting up after being on the battlefield the first time. Marianne goes full horse whisperer and fixes the problem.

Then leaks that she's talking to the horse lamo. Ingrid catches it. Ingrid thinks it's awesome though.

Ingrid tries to give Marianne confidence; it doesn't work.

As a fellow horse-girl, I love this.

DIMITRI & BERNADETTA A

Dimitri catches Bernadetta out again, and ofc she gets scared, but Dimitri just wants food bc he's working too hard and missed dinner.

Haha, Dimitri hates being shut in all the time.

Bernedetta thinks Dimitri's work is spying on her, but Dimitri assures her that's not it bc he has too much work to spy lamo.

Bernadetta is amazed at what Dimitri puts on his plate because it'll taste awful, but like he can tell :(

So they cook together. And she tries to cook something he likes, which is kind of sweet actually.

She got too flustered and messed up the dish. I know where this is going lol . . . Dimitri and his iron stomach.

Yep, she's shocked that Dimitri just . . . eats it.

Oh, God, she's going try it, but of course she hates it.

Bernedetta thinks he'll have her executed now, and Dimitri's like "do you seriously think I do that?"

So I guess this is his Hopes "Dimitri can't taste anything" support.

I love how he seems immune to Bernedetta's antics though. He just calmly explains that her fears aren't true and moves on.

SYLVAIN & IGNATZ B

Ignatz figured out a general time period that Sylvain's painting came from.

Oh, geeze, it's a color made from crushed gemstones? That must've been $$$$. Geeze.

Sylain was reading up on saints to get more info on the picture and might've figured out who it was. An archbishop (was it one of Rhea's fake personas?)

Ah, they think she looks like Rhea. So I'm right. Hahaha.

They're confused about that. Never in a million years . . . .

So this does confirm that Rhea just keeps faking her death.

I'm pleasantly surprised by this support. I love Sylvain, but Ignatz is . . . not interesting, but I like how it expanded on Sylvain's studious side, and he's an art fan! Now I like him even more.

ASHE & FLAYN C

Ashe is fishing to feed the army. Ashe, sweetie, one fish is . . . not going to make a difference.

Naturally, though, Flayn is very interested. Because fish.

Does Ashe place well in the fishing tournament in 3H? Would be interesting to see if the lore stayed the same about Ashe's skills.

Poor Flayn isn't allowed to fish bc Seteth gets too nervous with her around water, but Ashe lets her fish like she used to.

Honestly, Flayn looks too young for most of the guys, but she fits Ashe's look (and personality) really well.

Flayn almost catches a large fish but fails to catch it. B support will be about her catching it, I'm betting.

DEDUE & CATHERINE B

Catherine comments that Faerghus now trusts Dedue and Dimitri more. Dedue gives all credit to Dimitri, lamo.

Apparently people gave Dimitri crap for choosing Dedue over everyone else.

Catherine isn't religious either. But I thought Rhea was a tyrant who only allowed religious people near her??? /s

Neither Dimitri nor Rhea get too wrapped up in their own titles.

Both spend their free time helping people out.

Catherine is like, maybe Dimitri is rested by helping people out like that. Something Rhea, Dimitri, and Byleth have in common.

Catherine and Dedue think they could be friends, as long as Rhea and Dimitri stay on the same side.

DIMITRI & RODRIGUE A

Not ready for this, guys.

Dimitri wants to know how Rodrigue felt when Lambert died. :(

Rodrigue didn't believe it at first, but accepted reality eventually and remembered the promise he made.

Dimitri then asks what if he'd died in Duscur too?

Dimitri also thinks Rodrigue intended to die with Lambert, but Rodrigue confirms that he never wanted to die, but wouldn't mind dying to protect Dimitri/keep him in line.

(hahahah, no)

Dimitri says losing Rodrigue would be like losing another father :( confirmation that Rodrigue is like a father.

Rodrigue calls Dimitri out for not valuing his own life enough :( (or that he doesn't even value it at all :( ) saying that he's only following his king's example then.

And Dimitri's response is like, yeah, guess you're right, I have no excuse - probably . . . not what Rodrigue was looking for :(

He's like, yeah, that was probably too harsh, but thinks Dimitri sounded a lot like Lambert :(

Rodrigue always wanted to tell Lambert that.

Dimitri's emotional about sounding like his father :(

Sounds like Faerghus people are always telling each other not to throw their lives away.

Haha, Dimitri's like, I'm jealous of your bond with your friends, and Rodrigue implies that Felix wouldn't like hearing Dimitri imply he's not close with his, lamo. Rodrigue is such a dad to Felix, like that teasing king, which is just perfect for Felix being so prickly lamo.

MAP & SIDE BATTLES

Sylvain would rather turn enemies into allies than attack them. He's talking about Jeralt's mercenaries, but it's just more proof that he disliked resolving conflict with violence.

The common folk find Dimitri more approachable now. He's working on being more relaxed lol.

Dedue and Ashe talked about how Dimitri broke a pen during a war council. Shez suggests they name the pens so Dimitri's more attached to them and is less likely to break them. I cannot with these people. (also, can you imagine how put out Dimitri would be breaking a pen he named?) They also talk about how some people are scared of Dimitri because of his freakish strength :(

Seteth is impressed with Dimitri, who asks him about tactics a lot (which, side note, I'm so happy to see this game heap more praise on Dimitri, I get that AM's plot structure didn't really allow it as much, but it's nice to hear. Also, that it's Seteth is so cool, because he's by far one of the most wise characters).

Back to Seteth though, he explains he knows so much because he's studied this military genius Saint Cichol and really recommends his book. No bias at all there, guys.

And the saga of Balthus being obsessed with fighting Dimitri continues, lamo. (nobody blames you, Balthus, because, same, how can you not be a little obsessed with Dimitri's body after seeing it).

Mercedes and Constance were friends! That's cool. Also, not two braincells between them. (and I say that with affection)

I love how the game is going out of it's way now to show that Dimitri is asking for advice from experts, then making a decision based on what he's learned. His FEH support was about that, and I always liked that, so I like seeing him do it here.

Also, it seems I can't use Rodrigue again :( Actually, here's here for the side battles, so maybe I can?

MAIN BATTLE

OK, guys, time to get Byleth. Please let this be easy.

Someone very kindly wrote up a guide for me in a message. I never posted it so I could reference it, so let's hope I get it right the first time.

We're in the weird dimension with Arval, who's on high alert bc Byleth. But this time we recruit Byleth.

"Defeat Randolph" - Don't mind if I do!

Ok, so step 1 is selecting "Locate Ambushers." But I don't see that?

Kidding. I picked it.

I can't use Dimitri??? Oh, shit. He's BY FAR, my strongest unit. This is a shitty battle to lose him for. And Rodrigue. So I'm down 2 of my actually trained units. This sucks.

No Felix either?? This is really bullshit at this point. I basically only have Shez, Sylvain, Ingrid, Dedue, and Mercedes and Mercedes can't do shit, Dedue is also pretty awful, and Ingrid always dies. Ugh. This is going to be impossible. So basically just Shez and Sylvain.

Honestly, if this is too hard, I'm just going to let Byleth die because, to be honest, I'm really sick of playing this game. This route IS the only one I actually care about finishing though.

Ugh, I knew I'd hate this chapter, but taking away 3 units with no warning is just total bullshit.

Dimitri following me around is kinda cute though. And I forget how good Shez is. It's just, Dimitri's so strong I'm used to one-shotting at this point, lamo.

I also love how when Dimitri's a green unit, he's still fighting and not getting protected like the other 2. He's also . . . not someone I have to worry about dying. He's, uh, level 57 and suggested level is 44 so um.

Ok, so far so good. I got Fleche to show up, which is the next step. Now I just have to kill her quick.

Defeated Fleche. Now I need to see a command to defeat a dude, and a side command I ignore (guessing either defeat Byleth or Jeralt, the side one that I ignore).

So pretty sure I messed up and I need to "kill" all the mercenaries attacking the base BEFORE Fleche.

Ok, got Alois before he invaded. Just got Fleche. Pretty sure what's left is to not engage Byleth and rush kill Randolph.

Took Randolph out because I saved up all my warrior gauges.

OMG, I finished Randolph before the side mission was even announced lol.

I DID IT!!!! I got Byleth and Jeralt 😭

And I did it without Felix OR Dimitri 😭

So Jeralt surrendered after defeating everyone bc they decided to use logic and know they couldn't win. Plus, they want new clients.

Jeralt doesn't care about the conviction with the Empire, only coin. But he wants to avoid Rhea because of their past, but Dimitri sets conditions to make sure that Jeralt and co avoid her.

Guys, I can't believe I'm seeing the recruitment and not character death (I know it's Rodrigue, I couldn't let him die, no matter what)

I just saw the Byleth is playable card 😭

Guys, I saved Rodrigue.

Most of the Blue Lions are like, this is weird, but good. And they want to bond by sparing bc that's what the Blue Lions do lamo.

Shez ran off though. She's talking to Shez and figured that's best done not with people around.

Arval is way more chill about it than I thought.

Shez still has a goal though, to win the war and bring peace with Dimitri and co.

Getting ready to attack the monastery. Still kinda wish Claude was our enemy like the other 2 routes.

Everyone is standing by Dimitri.

Oh . . . Mercedes thinking about Death Knight? Betting she'll run into him soon. Can you recruit him in AG?

xxx

[cowboy-garfield]

wait, have you ever seen the larry evidence? these men are still writing songs about each other and fake dating women?? even if they’re not together now, they’re closeted. many ex-boy band members have come forward with their own experiences of being forced to hide their sexuality (i.e., lance bass, ricky martin)

LMAO IS THIS A TROLL ARE Y'ALL FUCKING WITH ME... this is one of my friends isn't it hsjdkghsk /j

Dude I hate to break it to you, but you've picked the wrong Rango to tango with. My irl friend has been studying the larrie conspiracy DEEPLY for more a year now out of morbid fascination, and I've been along for the entire ride. We're losing our shit on the phone as I type this. I made that brba post referencing the black mold thing before it even broke 200 notes. I know about your rainbow bears and tattoos and babygates and 28.

If you've got something to throw at me, give me your best shot. I'm already in the belly of the beast with your so-called "evidence." And I've never seen a bigger crock of parasocial copium and sunk cost fallacy in my LIFE.

Genuinely idk if this is someone fucking with me, but if you seriously obsess over and speculate and state personal details about real people as if they're factual... then you seriously need to reevaluate your life. Not only is it unhealthy, but it's just weird as hell.

You don't know these people, and they don't know you. They're grown ass multimillionaires who can do whatever the fuck they want.

Hell—they've been involved in WORSE scandals than if they were merely to come out, but y'all probably wouldn't acknowledge any of that to save your life—because then they wouldn't be your little victimized uwu boys. The victimization angle is very important to the agenda I've noticed, because if you tell yourself you're always on the defense (or that someone else is attacking you/whoever you're shipping), you're free from having to self reflect. You're the victims, so why would you need to?

Here is the real kicker though. The real nitty gritty. Even if it came out that these guys WERE closeted, it would still be weird and unhealthy!!

It's genuinely difficult for me to even say any of this, because I've seen the decade-long trips these people go on, and i know how insanely detached from reality they get. But in the simplest terms, it's not your fucking business.

Loving someone's songs, being a fan, buying their merch, streaming their music, or hell—even just liking them as people (which is fine within reason, just like anything)—none of these are qualifiers that give you permission to speculate the details of someone's personal life. There are no qualifiers. At all.

Everyone is entitled to privacy, and no amount of fan devotion gives you a magic coupon owing you those private matters. It doesn't even give you the right to speculate on them. Re: the Heartstoppers actor outing incident. You are not a special fan, and you are not owed anything. Especially when there are thousands and thousands of people who also think they're special fans who just "really get the guy."

Even if that's not what this original ask was specifically saying, that's what the whole culture around this bullshit claims. It's implied. "I'm in the special secret circle of people who know what's Really going on! God our boys need us to support them through this separation so bad :'( It must be so hard for them, I can't imagine. Thank god I'm the one seeing their Obvious signals. Thank god they have me. Those non-believers are just homophobic sheep; I'm the only one who really cares."

The only thing you people have done for them (other than adding half a decimal point to their mountainous bottom lines) is ruin their friendships and lives.

Try to imagine having every minute detail of your life documented and analyzed by people you don't know. Imagine all this invasion is being used to prove a lie about your intimate personal life, which you cannot make them stop believing because of the narrative they've already committed to. Imagine your every denial being 'just more proof.' Imagine your child, girlfriend, wife, being sent death threats daily for years. Imagine having everything from your body language to your cousins' instagram likes to your fucking shopping clothes be scanned for "clues." Everything.

Now imagine that same ferocious invasion extends to every friend, partner, family member, and random ass person you stand next to for five minutes--everyone you will ever meaningfully interact with. That's the fucking pain of theirs I can't imagine; not some made up fucking ship fic about how "the big mean suits are keeping the gay babies down ;("

I can't imagine it. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. And I honestly admire their decorum about it. Because if I was in that position long enough to not lose my fucking mind, you bet your ass I would go harder than this:

But who am I kidding. All these sources are just more false flags from HQ, aren't they? When you invent a boogeyman who doesn't exist—when you craft an entire fanfic ARG out of normal, meaningless occurrences—anything can just be waved offg. Anything can be proof, and anything can be lies from management. You're forever liberated from the shackles of critical thinking! How convenient.

I understand that this is a novel and a half for one ask, but don't mistake that as investment in convincing you. I fully realize I sound just like a redditor, but after more than a year of seeing this batshit, that brain fungus meme blowing up out of nowhere and bringing larries right to me? Oh god, that's ambrosia.

I have been confused, fascinated, and disgusted by this fandom for ages; it's like watching a car crash. Despite the length of this, it's never been worth my time enough to start fights with random blogs though. Most are so removed from reality that arguing would be pointless anyway; can't fight delusion with logic. If that worked, none of this would be happening in the first place. So having the opportunity to rip into this shit when it's been doordashed right to me is like crack. With a laughably confident ask to boot.

This isn't me being a tryhard; I know that so many Larries—especially the oddly large demographic of 30+y/o women—are beyond hope. They've put years up to the double digits into this narrative and likely had it impact their life negatively, which tends to happen when you obsess over a conspiracy. To admit defeat now—to accept reality; boring, thankless reality where they aren't the victims with a promised happy ending—would probably break their brains in half. (Not to mention the toxic hazing, doxxing, elitism, and witch hunts that occur in their own fandom. Don't think I don't know about that shit either.)

I say this with hedonistic glee: I wrote this shit for fun. I could have been working on final projects right now, but I wanted to do this instead. It's not so much wanting to be rude to you in particular as it is me ripping into HL fandom and celeb conspiracists in general. Sorry that your ask was the sacrificial lamb, anon, but I would also like to thank you for being on anon so I could go off without fear of people coming to harass you. If you're a naive fan who got indocrinated by other fans, sorry for the rude wake up call I guess, but tbh I'm not really holding my breath.

And let's knock out some allegations before they even start, shall we? I am not a homophobe. I am not saying celebrities aren't pushed to act a certain way or that abuse doesn't happen in the entertainment industry. I don't care about 1D (hell, half the time i can't tell them apart). RPF is at best, fucking weird and at worst, actively harmful. I think 1D's music is mid. I don't think their relationships are fake, nor do I think that WHOLE ASS CHILD is some random hired actor. As a lesbian, that guy couldn't be the janitor of the lesbians let alone the king. Fucking nobody irl talks about these guys. If they came out, it would be old news within a week. There is no Qanon-esque day of reckoning where they're going to come out and shut up all the #haters. There is no storyline; real life doesn't have those. Homophobia is bad, obviously. Regardless of my opinions on their music or crummy things they've done (which I don't even know much about since I don't care abt them aside from the Larrie craziness), I hate that this toxic fan bullshit has affected them negatively and that goes for any celebrity. This is a wider problem than just the 1D crowd; not even gonna touch beatles, tswift, or kpop. Reality has no clues like a fucking Columbo episode. Lastly, y'all aren't even special--said friend has unearthed at least five near-IDENTICAL rpf shipping conspiracies in everything from fifty shades of grey to olympic ice skating. And those aren't even gay, but they still give their fans secret symbols that they're being kept apart for Some Reason through clothing and special numbers.

Anyway. It's finals week and I have life shit to do. Larries, feel free to file this away in your 'Naysayers Who Will Be Proven Wrong Someday!' hoard. Briefly entertaining a reality where they do come out, guess what: I still don't give a shit. They're just two rich white dudes who make top 40 pop songs. Toxic parasocial fan behavior like this would still be just as weird and shitty as it is in our actual reality, where these guys have never openly declared dating anyone but women and verbally detest this shipping behavior.

I swear to God, it seems like most Larrie shippers don't even like the men that actually exist. That's the rub, isn't it? Reality sucks, but fantasy can be whatever you want it to be. All the things you like about these guys are authentic, and all the things you don't are just manipulation tactics by the puppetmaster marketing team. Forget the fact that they're fucking human beings and not dolls for your amusement or comfort.

You have no idea if they're fake dating women. You have no idea if they're closeted. You have no idea if the generic ass love songs they write are about each other. The truth none of you people realize is that you're probably never going to know, and if that just eats you up inside—good. That's your common sense trying to chew its way out of the cage of confirmation bias you locked it in.

[pancake-breakfast]

I've been chomping at the bit to get through the last few chapters of this volume, and finally, it is time!

Stream-of-consciousness thoughts for TriMax Vol. 8, Chapter 5 + Wolfwood Spinoff below.

Chapter 5: Parting Ways

Noooooo, who's parting wayyyys?? Everyone's finally set up to reunite!

LOL, the Punisher looks like it's taken some... punishment... in its fall from the ship.

They're looking for them! That's right, keep looking, guys!

OMG THEM <3 <3 <3 Protect him, Vash! Gods, he's soooo worried.

TBH, I think Vash is right to be shocked. I'd probably be shocked if I didn't Know Things. Gods, I don't wanna Know Things.

Aaand there's the vials! Drink 'er up!

STAMPEDE SPOILERS: I do think Stampede made the right choice in introducing those sooner rather than later. It doesn't destroy the tension around Wolfwood, because he's still Wolfwood and... well... yeah. Hard to get life-saving meds when you're not on great terms with the people who gave you the meds (and tend to go through it like it's candy).

And now he's providing some insight on Eye of Michael for Vash. And us. Good good good.

AND FOR ONCE NIGHTOW ACTUALLY USED THE BLACK BACKGROUND FOR FLASHBACKS. Gods, I wish he did this more often.

Awww, baby Wolfwood!

Also young Chapel, I guess, but I don't care about him NEARLY as much.

I mean, that's one way to train someone, I guess....

Ugh, poor kid. No one should have to go through this. He looks terrified, and probably rightly so.

Ah, there's the bit about his age not being what it appears to be.

He looks... I don't want to say "mournful" over what he's lost. More like he's already mourned it and accepted it as gone forever, and now there's just kind of a gaping hole in his heart where it used to be.

But there were more kids that ended up like him, most notably Livio, who Chapel seems to have recruited specifically as a "fuck you" to Wolfwood.

LOL, this is so them.

Vash in a blanket. Vash in a blanket!!! SOMEONE MADE HIM COZY!!! A:LGJA:OSDJ:FAJS:LDJ He needs to be cozy more often. He even has cozy slippers!

That's RIGHT, Knives! Stop trying to merge your being with your sisters! They'll win in the long run, 'cause they're used to being a hive mind.

Awww, Wolfwood's got a blanket, too. <3 Blankets for everyone.

The migration makes sense. Even in a world where communication isn't instantaneous, news spreads.

Yeah, Knives going after the envoy ships might not be so great.

Eyyy, it's our friend the gunsmith!

"Tumbleweed." That's a very apt name for Vash, all things considered.

Vash is sooooo happy to see him.

This guy. He's like, "My death got ruined by some jerk giving me a reason to live."

Ever-hopeful, ever-determined Meryl. <3

Marlon probably doesn't know it, but he's providing Vash with more than just a weapon here. Given how poorly their last meeting went, Vash probably expects Meryl to hate and fear him, but by telling him this story, Marlon lets Vash know Meryl still has hope in him. Enough hope to want him to be protected.

OMG, he's gonna repair the Punisher. He calls repairing the Punisher child's play. Who is this man?!

Vash, still looking tired and wan, but also looking hopeful again.

(Also, I love his floofy hair throughout this whole chapter. You can really see where Stampede took their inspiration.)

Geez, is Knives even absorbing dead Plants? This is not good. For him, I mean. It might actually work out ok for other people.

Is... is Knives trying to kill himself? Or just part of himself? The part of himself that feels sympathy for Vash despite the destruction of all the Plants? Does he even realize how many of these Plants would probably still be alive if it weren't for him "rescuing" them??

Epic Wolfwood spread! Looks like Marlon got the Punisher back in tip-top shape. (Hats off to @trigun-manga-overhaul for all their work stitching together pages like this.)

Noooooo, don't leave, Wolfwood! Vash needs you around! Have you learned nothing?? *SIGH* This means they're not gonna be getting the band back together, doesn't it.

Wolfwood Spinoff: Freed Bird

I'm glad he's free... but... I don't want him off on his own.

Ahhhh! I'd heard he whittled things but wasn't sure if it was true!

For reference, the ガタ ガタ (gata gata) sound on the right-hand panels is the sound of Wolfwood's knife, and the キ キ イイイ (ki ki-iii) sounds on the left-hand panel are bird cries.

Yeah, flying does a number on one's metabolism. There's a reason birds are poop machines. As anyone who's ever owned a bird knows.

LOL, this driver's like, "I'm glad you're an artist, but I need to get paid in cash."

I wonder where Angelina is....

Wolfwood's already making friends, I see.

Is Wolfwood blushing as he watches her?

Ah, trading women as products is common enough that she doesn't even flinch at the suggestion.

This is a shitty situation, since chances are he gets the Plant in the marriage anyway. Either way, she loses.

I'm beginning to think Wolfwood's not the "freed bird" referred to in the title.

*cue MAPPA flying bird reflected in a close-up of an eyeball scene*

Oh, no. Wolfwood has a soft spot for orphans.

Ah, seems like she's made her choice. Not because it's the choice she particularly wants to make, but because it's the only choice she knows how to make.

Haaaahahahahahaha, she thinks he got to choose his own path. He carved his road to his own path in literal bodies and blood.

I dunno, man. Different strokes for different folks. Something something "give me the freedom of the starving wolves." We all make sacrifices, and we have different opinions on what we're willing to sacrifice. I'm sure Wolfwood would prefer a life of not wandering around, wondering where his next bed and meal will come from, but he should know he chafes under collars and leashes.

You can't believe she doesn't remember you? When did she last see you??

Hahahahaha, he's so determined. He looks angry, but apparently the baby enjoys mad-dogging him back.

Yeah, she's not exactly walking here. She's not gonna remember you from that, Wolfwood!

LOL, eat the bird.

Oh, so this orphanage also adopts their kids out to actual families? Who knew? I thought they were all just Eye of Michael fodder.

Aww, toddler version of Maylene doesn't want to leave big brother Nico.

Now I'm thinking he was blushing at her not because of any attraction, but more out of pride at how much she's grown.

Oh, great. Who's this clown??

Ugh, it's the loan shark. He looks skeevy.

Uhhhh, what happened to Wolfwood? Who's this chick?

Oh, it's Maylene. She looks ready for a fight. Why was she chillin' in a dark room like that?

This panel, tho.

Why'd they beat him up?

Oh, they think he convinced her to refuse the offer? Man, this loan shark guy is dumb. I got the distinct impression she's never liked him. But of course it couldn't be because of anything he's done. It MUST be someone else's fault she's rejecting him.

Duuuuude. This guy assumes Wolfwood somehow seduced her, and he's ready and willing to kill both Wolfwood and Maylene if he did. Seems like GREAT husband material.

LOL, Wolfwood doesn't even justify his dumb-ass question with a reasonable response. You can just tell Wolfwood's head is full of murder-thoughts here.

Ah, now she's blaming him for the situation, too. Vash really has rubbed off on Wolfwood.

It's hard to tell, but I think Wolfwood is protecting her from the gunfire by keeping them both behind the Punisher.

This guy. He's got himself a tank to take out someone he thinks might be getting laid more than he is?

Wolfwood. Buddy. How dare you tell her she should have just married this guy.

Look, she'd rather die than go into a gilded cage! That's how it is sometimes! A cage is still a cage! And her purported husband-to-be is absolute filth!

Oh, good. Wolfy's coming around. At the very least, he wants to defend Maylene, and he recognizes this guy is trash. Just take a few more steps in the right direction, friend.

I get he was trying to keep her from the kind of hard life he's lived, but he's just the bird envying the person on the ground. He doesn't get that there are difficulties on both sides and you kinda have to pick your poison... if you're lucky enough to even have the choice.

He is still proud of her, despite his harsh words and narrow vision.

She may or may not recognize him, but she is aware of the impact he had on her young life.

Author Bonus Chapter

I wanna... just soak in water for a bit....

LOL, always a good plan to run away for a bit of one gets stuck being at home.

What's 1/F?

Wolfwood sure does spend a lot of time covered in blood. WHO'S FAULT IS THAT, NIGHTOW?!?!

"Silly manga" my foot... Tell that to my therapist. (Just kidding; Trigun Book Club is my therapist for this stuff. Sorry, folks!)

Archive

Trigun Vol. 1: Covers + 1-3, 4, 5-6, 7-8, 9-10 || Vol. 2: Covers + Extras, 1, 2-4, 5-6, 7-8

TriMax Vol. 1: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 2: Covers + 1, 2-4, 5, 6-7 || Vol. 3: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-7 || Vol. 4: Covers + 1-2, 3-5, 6-7 || Vol. 5: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 6: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 7: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 8: Covers + 1-2, 3-4

Extra Credit: Trigun Vol. 1: Nebraska vs. Vash's Motivations, Vash's Loneliness, Vash's Depression (pt 2 of post), Soupy Brains || Vol. 2: Coin Factoids || TriMax Vol. 1: Lina, Vash, and a Haircut || Meryl, Vash, and the Pursuit of Happiness || Vol. 5: Knives, Vash, and Hatred for Humanity || Vol. 6: Coping Series: Wolfwood, Meryl, Vash || Vol. 8: The Uncoordinated Counterattack

[c-animates]

We need a talk.

Let me just say it now:

PLEASE! For the love of god,stop arguing over ships.

Everyone has been getting so aggressive over fictional robot couples in a web series for no reason. Not only has it made this fandom more toxic over time and made others leave because it's been getting really bad,but also having people getting harassed over this. Even though most of this fandom is filled with mostly young teens,you all should still know better than to do these things. And don't say stuff like "But it's not that bad!" and to that i say: "If it's not that bad,i wouldn't be here talking about it in the first place.". Besides,our lives too short to be going after others with pointless fights about stuff like this. All i'm saying is for you all to be civil going forward and to not shove your opinions in people's faces. That's all i ask. Just stop going after others just because they have a different opinion than you.

Hopefully at least 1 person takes my words to heart and becomes better. And before you ask,no i'm not anti-shipper or whatever you call those people. I'm just a fan who's grown tired of the state this fandom is in and i want everybody to get along and not be jerks to each other.

[da-gamingojichan]

Dick/Pussy Headcanons dropping when?

i wont lie guys i dont really know the variety of how genitalia can be different very well..... the most ive learned is when i went online and saw someone made a caard about their headcanons for the matusno brothers which included very detailed descriptions of each of their dicks (how i learned penises irl can have different amounts of curve) and their mental illness hcs (how i learned narcassism counts as a mental illness) and a bunch of other shit. but i have a little bit of headcanon for the characters i think a lot about

- germany has a penis that leans on the larger side and its terrible because he is never using it. its kinda ugly idk how because all genitals are ugly but he somehow has an ugly penis compared to other penises because germany is meant to be ugly to his core. it also turns super red like uncomfortably red (bright cherry red iphone 3) because i think he gets red really easily since hes freakishly pale. also his penis is abnormally sensitive but he doesnt know this because the only person to touch it is italy and italy has sex skills gifted by the lord so hes blessed because if anyone else gave him a handjob or blowie hed be like OWWW IT HURTS STAWP STAWP TOO HARD!!!!!

- italy has the most amazing awesomesauce pussy fucking ever. his pussy and strap on skills induce the same level of peace and prosperity as the shit those monks that live on the tops of mountains are aiming for. he literally has a talent thats gifted by god and it is in fact RIGHTEOUS of him to be banging bitches left and right because he needs to share his divine gift to the world. and thats why its fucking hilarious that hes wasting all this raw talent and perfect sex on hetalia "premature ejaculation king" germany. the mf that literally cant recieve a blow job without overstim because he always finishes before his penis makes contact with le mouf. germany would literally like anything from italy and italy is the sex god thats been cutrently saving our world from the nymphojinn. italy is the real life huniepop protagonist and hes retired to never have sex ever because his boyfriend is fucking scared and when he does its over with in 2 minutes.

- japan has a small penis. japanese men grower not show-er! i believe that japan wants to top but he never will because he cant be deadass enough to assert himself and say he wants to. also because if he tops the ship name has to have jap in it (IM JAPANESE I CAN SAY THE SLUR) and i think thats awesome and hilarious but people dont like that so hes banned from semeing forever because its racist. but i believe in his head he is a total kinky otaku sex freak who wants to seme so bad and use a jillion million sex toys you didnt even know could exist.

- prussia also has a slightly below average penis and hes very very very very very embarassed about it he will never admit its small he goes NO ITS GREAT AND MIGHTY OKAY. he calls his dick his "beautiful gleaming white saber of justice" sometimes and everybody fucking hates it. also its really sensitive so hes really picky about head and it pisses romano off because romano can tell when hes faking being comfortable (but it also would piss him off if prussia said his head wasnt good enough) and because of that he gives prussia head everytime they bang and its painful and prussia dreads it everytime and is like hahaha you dont have to if you dont want to... and romanos like "SHUT the fuck up and lay down you ungrateful piece of shit" but slowly he actually gets really fucking good and prussia likes it because hes refined his craft but now because prussia likes it romano stops and only gives head when prussia begs and pleads because giving head is disgusting.

- romano has a pretty good penis like idk what makes a penis pretty good. but its pretty good trust me on this guys its nothin to scoff at the ladies would love it if romano got any ladies (never ever). its regarded as a handsome penis i think like wow thats pretty good! its pretty average sized, maybe on the smaller end of the spectrum and that makes romano mad and incredibly insecure even though it doesnt really matter since romano is actually just a grower not a show-er. but yeah its good.

- benson regular show has a 6/10 gumhole.

[merp-blerp]

I'm sorry if I'm insulting certain swifties, but I don't like the sudden theory that Midights was a breakup album the whole time. I understand the Jaylor breakup threw the fans for a loop, and we are used to clowning on average, but this theory... just doesn't make sense to me. Taylor and Joe were seen at least twice post-Midnights’s release before the breakup, so how could the album be about breaking-up with him? You think Taylor’s wrote breakup songs about him before they broke up, invisible stringing him along for a few months till she decided to call it quits? That’d be pretty mean of her. I don’t think anyone wants to believe that about her without proof. Maybe I’m misunderstanding the theory, but it just doesn’t make sense to me. And I’ve even seen people claiming that the breakup’s been hinted at since the Lover era. THE LOVER ERA! Come on, guys!

You can have any interpretation you’d like, but try not to connect it to Taylor’s personal life too hard to the point where you deluded yourself that you know her. She allows speculations like that, yes. But in moderation. Don’t be invasive. For example, I think songs like Ivy, Fearless, and I Know Places can have sapphic interpretations. Does that mean I’m labeling her as a lesbian or a sapphic person? No. I just like to interrupt songs through a sapphic lens sometimes ‘cause I’m a lesbian and want to relate on a personal level. I don’t think any of those songs are inherently sapphic just ‘cause I can interrupt them that way (except maybe Ivy, which tells a fictional story made up by Taylor). And I also don’t want to intrude on Tay’s life. If she’s queer that’s her business and she doesn’t owe the fans deep info on her sexuality. If she came out I’d be so happy for her; if she choose to “stay in the closet” or actively said that she wasn’t queer, I’d still be happy for her. In comparison, she doesn’t owe fans an explanation for what happened with Joe, so we shouldn’t make theories that intrude on both of them. Midnights could be interpreted as a breakup album, going through the stages of grief for a relationship, and it’s okay to do so. Does that mean it inherently is? It probably isn’t. It’s inherently about “sleepless nights scattered throughout [her] life” because she said so. We’ve known this since the first announcement.

I know that many of us thought Taylor and Joe were never going to breakup ‘cause they made us believe in love, and the breakup has really made us feel a lot of things; it’s made some fans feel hurt and want to blame something or someone to get rid of the pain. And God knows we don’t want to blame Taylor, so some people (baselessly) are picking on Joe. I myself only began to believe that the breakup rumors were even true once Taylor began to (seemingly) reference that she was now single (and I don’t regret doing that) and I made a whole post about how it made me feel. But no need for us swifties to lose our heads and stop heeding logic over this. No need to try to sniff out what happened, invading Joe and Taylor’s personal lives. No need to start rumors about Joe cheating on her or anything else without Taylor saying he did so. No need to start making fun of Joe’s looks or whatever (though, toxic swifties were doing that even while they were together, so maybe I can’t ask them to get rid of their cognitive dissonance and not bully people in the name of a woman who notoriously hates bullying). No need to start shipping Taylor with her friends; shipping real people can get really toxic if you aren’t careful, so I recommend abstaining from it if you can. Please just respect Joe and Taylor instead of trying to find drama where there is seemingly none. They could’ve broken up amicably, have you considered that? We don’t even know where to look for drama right now in this situation. So many good things are happening with Taylor, like her breaking records yet again like the queen she is, so let’s try to focus on that. I too want the best for Taylor and don’t want to lift up those who’ve hurt her for no good reason, but we don’t know if Joe did anything. Keep cool while we slowly learn more—and I mean slowly—and respect those who deserve to be respected.

[ryuichirou]

Replies

More replies! We have a couple of asks about Jack today~ Talked a lot about the good boy of the cast lol

Oh, and spoiler warning for Kuroshitsuji and twst ch7 for the second reply (the first one under the “read more”) thing. Kind of sort of?? Just to be safe.

Anonymous asked:

"I try not to spend more than one hour per day on writing replies." Omg, ryuichi, you spend almost 1 hour replying to asks?! Are you ok?! Don't push yourself.

Also, femChenya, being able to change her breast size, is so cursed that i love it. Thanks, i won't stop thinking about that for the rest of the day lmao.

(related to our hc post)

Aww thank you for your concern, Anon!! I’m just very slow at writing things, and I tend to talk a lot, so it takes longer than it should. But I really want people to get their replies + I really enjoy writing them, so it’s fun! If I get tired, I’ll just skip a day or two… As long as people don’t mind me replying after like a month, it’s all good lol

I’m glad you enjoyed that Che’nya headcanon! She is one cursed cat, I’m 100% sure she has startled Riddle with this trick multiple times…

Anonymous asked:

Silver 🤝Snake

Being cute silver haired boys mentally broken  by Yana Toboso by finding out the truth about two conflicting sides related to their family/found family

TRUEEEEE!!

Every time we talk about Snake we keep calling him Silver :( This is a curse that cannot be lifted, and of course both of these calm and quiet silver haired babes are going to suffer emotionally in the worst way possible. Poor boys (they look so cute when they suffer though)

Anonymous asked:

Hehe...Vil and Azul being in-laws will be hilarious. Like if it is Christmas and that all those two did just bicker and argue. Idia too scared to confront them while Ortho cheers for Vil. Also a way to get Azul to exploit Vil...

(related to our previous repliy)

God how much I want to see them celebrate Christmas together lol it really would be a disaster. Poor Idia just wants everyone to disappear, he has games to play and anime to watch.

I wonder how long it’d take for Azul to stop trying to act like the slimiest smiling nice guy in the world and start getting openly irritated by Vil who doesn’t buy his bullshit. I guess spending Christmas holidays together would be enough lol

furubatsu asked:

I just read Jack's dorm vignette and idk if you ship them or not but I need your take on whatever the fuck he and Ruggie have going on. He's insane in that story.

*addendum of my prev ask: I meant I now you don't ship them, I just wanted your take on Jack and Ruggie because what the fuck is that vignette? (Also even with some of your ships I don't like, I am very into your takes o  the chara ters and their dynamics)

Sorry for the late reply, but we FINALLY watched that vignette, and it was so funny and weird. Just like you said…  Jack is insane TwT

Just like you said, we don’t ship these two, but that interaction gave us quite some food to chew on. And ironically, the only thought I have in my head after watching this is “wow, Jack really is just a puppy”. Maybe it’s because with Jack I always get this weird desire to treat him like a pup, he is surprisingly cuddable for a guy his size. In a “gosh how pwecious you are, with your floofy tail and ears awwww who’s a good boi yes you are mister doggie sir”. And Jack’s behavior in this vignette certainly didn’t help with that at all lol

But overall it’s just cute that he has this dog (wolf) mentality of trying to find order or hierarchy in a group that he is a part on. He needs the structure of a pack, I guess it’s just more natural to him. What’s also interesting is that while he admires Ruggie and I guess has chosen him as a leader (congrats on being an alpha, Ruggie…?), he doesn’t want a boss. I think the guys nailed it when they realised that Jack is acting like a little brother who has a lot to learn from Ruggie.

Which is suuuuper ironic because while being a good older brother for his own younglings, Ruggie really doesn’t want to get all familial with the guys from NRC. He wants connections and useful friendships, but when it comes to the type of dynamic Jack asks for, Ruggie is like the one person who wouldn’t want this type of closeness. And it’s very interesting to see how he just doesn’t get Jack’s desire to help him out and protect him selflessly and gratuitously.

So yeah, they’re interesting! We also liked their interactions in the Portfest event. Jack is super stubborn with his morals and his urge to do good things to people he respects, and it’s hilarious how Ruggie can’t really fight it and is visibly uncomfortable with it because of how unusual it is to him.

(Also, thank you so much for your kind words, I am very happy that you like the way I talk about the characters even if you don’t like some of our ships <3 I appreciate it a lot!)

Anonymous asked:

how do you feel about jack/epel? is a vanilla but sweet ship imo, and i think epel definitely would have a thing for buff men

i also may or may not hc rook has an interest in everyone’s “mating habits”, especially the non human students. he’d find it interesting watching his junior take on a big beastman

They are kind of too vanilla for us because Jack is general is kind of vanilla despite his animalistic side, so it’s not a huge ship for us, but it’s still a very good one! Epel absolutely has a thing for buff men, it’s funny how pretty much all of his ships are just him + huge animalistic guy… Epel would try to act like he’s “one of the dudes”, just another buff bro in his soul, but we all know how giggly he would get if, you know. Things happened.

And the Rook hc is pretty much canon, at least in my head lol There is absolutely no way he wouldn’t get interested. What a blessing it is that Epel’s potential mates are wolves, eels and all kinds of animals~ It makes the whole experience even more beauté

[magic-and-moonlit-wings]

Thoughts on ‘The Sea Beast’

SPOILERS AHOY!

I loved the character designs, for the humans and the creatures. I feel like the design team had a lot of fun.

It was neat how the castle architecture and decor had a palette of sea green, gold, and white, yet still felt very aquatic, rather than leaning on an “ocean theme = blue” palette.

The royal couple’s costumes kind of gave me ‘sea monster’ vibes even before they were confirmed to be antagonistic characters. I think it was all the little triangles on the trim. (According to a sewing website I’ve read, those are called Van Dyke points, but I’m not sure how widely used that term is.)

I think Blue is the same species as Red, just a different colour while a baby. The angler lure will lose its light and turn into a crest as Blue gets older. I want a plushie of Blue, and maybe one of the yellow ones as well.

I very, very much want to see a video of Voltaire’s song “The Beast Of Pirate’s Bay” using clips from this movie.

Captain Crow was super dumb for dumping the Hand Of God harpoon overboard as soon as Red was captured. Even if he was holding off on killing her until they got back to the capital, keeping the poison on hand might have been a good idea in case they needed to, oh, I don’t know, sedate the giant beast again?

Potential reasons I came up with for why humans and sea beasts would be in conflict:

Some combination of the following:

1. It started due to honest misunderstandings, akin to a shark’s “test bite” of a surfer.

Sea beasts are huge, and big things need lots of food. Know what has a lot of calories? Mammal meat. It is not unreasonable to think some types of sea beast might eat whales. Ships at sea would be mistaken for a whale surfacing to breathe, the sea beast would come up to eat it, and oops, it’s not a whale after all.

Even the story about how “them beasts would come right up to shore, pluck a lady from her veggie patch, and swallow her up” could be based on true events. If a sea beast preyed on pinnipeds (seals, sea lions, and walruses), they could mistake humans on the beach for seals and go after them, expecting them to be slower and clumsier out of water.

2. Sea Beast territory blocks an otherwise-desirable trading route.

Plenty of wars and conflicts in human history have been about controlling trade routes. As a coastal territory, much of the kingdom’s trade is presumably by sea.

3. Sea Beast territory overlaps with otherwise-desirable fishing grounds.

As stated in Hypothesis 1, big animals need lots of food. Red’s whirlpool trick is presumably to cluster fish together so she can eat a bunch of them in one bite.

Coastal regions also tend to be heavily dependant on fishing for food.

4. The horns are harvested for ‘medicinal’ purposes.

It fits with the whaling metaphor (harvesting blubber and spermaceti for lamp oil, and baleen for corset boning), the big game hunting theme (rhino horns used as an aphrodisiac), and the theme of hunting supernatural creatures (unicorn horns, and narwhal tusks, could supposedly detect and cure poisons).

5. The Royal Family have discovered the Sea Beasts make useful scapegoats.

“Yes, we had to raise taxes, but it’s to fund the hunters and protect our people from the beasts!”

“Yes, everything is expensive, because it’s hard to get imports past the beasts and we can only produce so much locally.”

Depending on what people believe about the sea beasts’ intelligence and capabilities, it might even be possible to blame them for storms, droughts, floods, and tidal waves.

6. It’s a direct side-effect of the whaling industry.

Related to Hypothesis 3; sea beasts have sunk whaling ships, and compete for the same prey. Humans started trying to wipe them out so they’d stop getting in the way.

(I did not actually expect this to be canon, since whaling is generally frowned upon by a modern audience and this is a kids’ movie, so the scriptwriters wouldn’t want to get into that.

Also, do whales even exist in this world, or do sea beasts fill that ecological niche? We never see proof onscreen that whales coexist with sea beasts, but the ocean is vast and it’s hard to prove a negative.)

7. From the Sea Beasts’ perspective, humans are a fellow beast with whom they are competing for territory.

I mean, looking at things from a certain angle, this isn’t totally wrong.

The Explanation The Movie Gave:

Generations ago, the Royal Family told everyone that Sea Beasts were bad and needed to be hunted. They did this for ... reasons.

On my second watching, I puzzled out, “Maybe that’s part of the point, that the real motives were lost to history and sometimes you don’t get to find out why; some random kid like Maisie never got to find out the full truth, but she still found out the important part - that the manipulation existed, and that sea beasts aren’t actively malicious - and that’s why it’s important to question stuff people have ‘always known’, because details get lost over time and could’ve been wrong to begin with.”

But for a first watching, wow, talk about leaving an important plot thread hanging.

[galacticwildfire]

Illicit Affairs | Obi-Wan Kenobi

Two

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Amidala!oc

Rhea Amidala meets Obi-Wan Kenobi when he and his master come to her younger sisters aid and he discovers the queen's sister was once a Jedi, expelled from the order for her unwillingness to forgo love and attachment. The two stranded together on Tatooine find common ground despite their differences, and above all a hope within the other for something greater than themselves.

Word count: 6k

Tags/warnings: some angst, mostly fluff, a bit of darth maul

A/N: enjoy the fluff while it lasts because my god will there be angst. Also this is one of my favourite star wars chapters I've ever written

~

~

~

Obi-Wan and I stand outside the ship, watching the sand storm in the distance as it becomes clear to us this won't be just a quick stop.

"Follow after them," I tell Panaka and for once we're in agreement. "The rest of the crew will be safe with me, but I need to know she's safe."

"At once," he says and leaves to track them down, leaving Obi-Wan and I in charge.

I know it's raised questions in his mind why I'd send the queens guard after a handmaiden but he isn't an idiot, he knows there's reasons why a young queen has a selection of nearly identical handmaidens. 

"Well, this is definitely going to slow them down," he comments while I nod.

"She better be careful," I find myself muttering and sigh "I trust her, but still."

"Still you worry," he finishes. "That's understandable. Let me guess, Padme is your sister and the queen inside is a decoy?"

Considering he's in charge of her safety as much as I am I nod. "Yes. That's right."

"It's smart," he appreciates. "So the queen is with my master then." I nod again and he assures me. "She is safe with him."

"I know, but I don't trust him to be able to keep her from doing anything risky, which is why I've sent Panaka. She'll listen to him."

"By risky you mean anything you'd do?"

That brings a shadow of a smile to my face. "Precisely."

I look at him and see a shadow of one on his face as well now we've called a truce and curse myself a little for actually liking him, I will give it to him that it's been a long time since someone's held their own with me in an argument and not despised me afterwards. It's an unfortunate past time for me arguing over ideology.

But that isn't why I like him, no, it's something deeper than a mere respect, perhaps an appreciation for his company during this anxiety. 

It's then I hear Rabe call for me "A transmission from home!"

Obi-Wan and I share a look before heading back inside the ship where Sabe takes the transmission and I brace myself as an advisor appears.

"The death toll is catastrophic," Padme's advisor tells us in a hologram. "We must bow to their wishes. You must contact me."

"No," I immediately say switching it off. "He's a captive, we can't trust him now."

"She's right it's a trick," Obi-Wan agrees. "Send no reply. Send no transmissions of any kind."

"They'll only use it to reverse the signal to find our location," I say and he nods in agreement as I order the crew "Ensure there is no way they can intercept a location from the ship."

"Yes my lady," they immediately say but Obi-Wan isn't finished.

"Obi-Wan?" I ask as he leaves the room and follow him into the cockpit. "Obi-Wan?"

"I'm contacting Qui-Gon," he tells me, bringing this to his masters attention. "Master Qui-Gon, there's been a transmission from one of the Queen's advisors begging the queen to bow to the Trade Federation's wishes and contact them."

"It sounds like bait to establish a connection trace," he says, agreeing with what Obi-Wan and I believe.

Obi-Wan looks to me as he apologetically asks "But what if it is true, and people are dying?"

"Then those decisions fall to me," I tell him with a weight on my shoulders since Padme isn't here. "All we can do is wait for them to return so we can get off this rock and appeal to the Senate."

If it were up to me I would have acted the moment they first threatened us as her advisor for military matters, except there is no military despite my urging of Padme to begin expanding the security force. If we had a military I'd storm the city and wipe out the Trade Federation but that's not the Naboo way, it's not how Padme was raised. It was how I was raised. With Mace Windu over my shoulder, being my masters master.

"Either way we're running out of time," Qui Gon tells us before cutting the connection and we share a heavy look.

"I'm sorry this has happened to you and your people," Obi-Wan tells me, and he genuinely does mean it, he wants to help as much as I do.

"The trouble with being a pacifist planet with no military is this," I tell him and remember "Mace Windu trained my master and took a liking to me because I suppose I was more like him than the others, I had his urge for action over inaction, the only issue was I took that too far." He takes my words in and treats them with concern. "He'd be useful now."

"Mace Windu is an oddity that much is for sure," he agrees, the purple lightsaber being the least of it. "But have faith in Qui-Gon."

"I do," I assure Obi-Wan as we head back into the room with the generator, empty of handmaidens and security, just us. "I don't know how many diplomatic missions I accompanied Master Billaba on and yet I'm useless when I find myself in the middle of my own. Panaka and the rest don't respect my council, they know Padme just appointed me that so I'd feel some purpose."

"You do have purpose," he says and upon seeing the look on my face insists. "You do."

"Whatever purpose I had I gave it up when I was just fourteen," I tell him and he's quiet as I sigh and finally admit the truth. "Five years ago I was Padme's age. I knew I didn't fit in how I should, so I'd look to Qui-Gon and Mace Windu to convince myself I had a place there, but that's the thing, they took me when I was still old enough that I could remember a different life."

He nods in understanding and confides as he may have before if I hadn't jumped to arguing for the sake of it. "I've tried to hold onto my own memories, they slip away with age but there's still fragments, my mothers shawl, my fathers hands." Emotion creeps into his voice. "I think I had a baby brother."

The way his voice wavers with vulnerability exposes my own. "I have an older sister, Sola. She's only a year older than me, we were inseperable, and Padme well, she was just a baby when they came for me."

He looks confused "But it's Republic regulation to test children upon birth for force sensitivity?"

"Somehow I slipped through the cracks," I find myself saying but remember "Now I think about it all those off world relief missions my father would take me on as a child may have been for a reason. He was the one who fought against me being taken after all so maybe they did come when I was younger when I wasn't there. I mean, what better excuse is there to give than the potential Jedi is away helping those in need? Perhaps whoever they sent thought it could only benefit me and decided to come back in a year."

"It is a reasonable answer," he says, seeming surprised almost but I can't pinpoint why. 

"I had just turned six when they came and tested the family, Sola was normal, Padme- I think she might have been a little higher than normal but whatever I am it's enough that they told me they couldn't wait any longer and that I had to go with them and my mother happily agreed." A tear slips from the corner of my eye despite my best efforts and I don't wipe it away. "I didn't understand, she just stood there with my father as my sister cried and I was screaming. It was actually Master Windu who took me and well, you can imagine he wasn't gentle with the dressing down he gave me about my emotions." I realise my hands are trembling slightly as I grip the flowing fabric of my jumpsuit, red and gold like the royal colours of Naboo but with none of the extravagance, a halter around my neck with a fitted waist and a flowing bottom. I cling to the feeling of the fabric, to ground myself as I was taught and look up at the ceiling as I ramble. "I know it sounds pathetic, all of the Jedi were taken from their families but for some reason it was something I could never get over."

I'm jolted out of my daze by the touch of his hand on my cheek, wiping away that single tear and the touch is so foreign, to be comforted. "It's okay Rhea," he says gently. "You don't need to explain."

I let out a tearful laugh as I reach up to touch his hand, grasping it tight for some sort of stability before pulling it away from my face, still unable to be contented with being comforted. "You can see why I never made it as a Jedi now can't you?"

He shakes his head. "You can't blame yourself for loving your family, it's only human. Master Qui-Gon tells me that it's not as if we aren't allowed to have these feelings whatever they may be, but that it's our responsibility to let them go instead of holding on."

I look at him finding a new middle ground, realising perhaps Qui Gon's led his interpretation of the code to something more human than I'd first observed.

"I wish all Jedi thought as you and Qui-Gon did," I admit to him. "If they did perhaps I would have come here with you as an ambassador instead of as an escapee."

My eyes meet his and I realise my hands been touching his for far too long and release it, not knowing what to do with how that makes me feel as he tells me "You might not be a part of the order, but that doesn't change what you are."

I give him the same kind smile he gives me and my eye catches the glint of his saber. "I do miss it, my saber."

He raises a curious eyebrow "What form did you study?"

"My master insisted on III but I preferred form V."

He's almost amused. "Of course you would."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I laugh.

"It's a form built on dominating your opponent," he says and remarks "If that isn't you in a nutshell."

I want to try to refute his assessment but it's accurate. "Well, you aren't wrong. I was top of my class at a young age with saber skills, I remember Master Dooku even paying special attention to me but he'd left the order by the time I was old enough to become a padawan and so Master Billaba took me on. I worked on my form but it was Master Windu of all people who saw the emotions in me and gave her permission to teach me VII."

"Seven?" he exclaims, truly scandalised now. "That's seen as taboo by the council, forbidden even."

There's a troublesome glint in my smile. "Exactly, but under certain circumstances they'll allow it. It was Master Windu who invented Vaapad and taught it to my master and she taught it to me with his permission. My masters believed my passion only fueled my strength because for me there was no darkness since it didn't come from a place of fear, but justice."

"Passion?" he repeats, and I know that would be a rare word for Jedi like him.

"Yes, the forbidden fruit," I say, tasting the words with a dramatic touch to my voice. "Oh such a dangerous thing passion, oh no Obi-Wan Kenobi don't dare speak the word or else you'll turn Sith!"

He can't help but laugh and so do I, smiling as I lean back against the broken hyperdrive generator, feeling a kinship I haven't felt since I left the order.

"That is one thing Master Qui-Gon does not discourage," he suddenly tells me. "Passion."

"Really?" I ask and keeping it light inquire "So, does that mean you've explored forbidden attachments."

From the way his cheeks redden and his eyes sadden I have my answer. "When I was a lot younger and a lot less wiser."

He'd be in his early twenties but Jedi always do grow up too fast and become consumed with grief far too young. I know many padawans would play kissing games and such, but have an inkling that what he's referring to isn't anything like that.

"Are they alive?" I ask, treading carefully, feeling the energy change between us.

He gives a stiff nod. "Yes, that's what I was assigned to do, keep her alive." Now it's him who struggles with words and hesitates before telling me. "For a year I was with her, protecting her, but I never acted on what I felt until the mission came to an end."

I'm quiet, his forbidden attachment wasn't playful or even sexual, it was something far deeper.

"You loved her," I realise and he looks away, I don't press further. "It seems I mistook you, because you would know the struggles between love and duty better than I ever could."

I see him realise that he does, perhaps more than he ever admitted to himself before. 

"It was a long time ago."

I nod, taking the burden of conversation off of him, finding myself able to speak with more ease with him than anyone I've ever known despite this short time in each other's company.

"I've never been in love despite all my concerns about attachment," I confide in him, finding irony that I raise such issues when I've never had to deal with them as he has. "I've certainly never been loved either."

His eyes meet mine and it's as if he can read my feelings "But you want to be."

"Who doesn't?" I reply quietly. "If you had the chance to love again wouldn't you take it? Code and duty aside of course."

I watch him ponder that question and he's conflicted "I wouldn't want to suffer that loss again."

"To love without fear, that's what I desire," I tell him, realising in my heart just how alone I've been for so long. "I'm willing to take whatever grief may come, if only to be loved."

Here we are, two Jedi, discussing the most forbidden thing we possibly can.

Love.

Before either of us can dig this hole any deeper I feel my transmitter going off and it jolts me back to the situation at hand.

"That will be Padme," I say, her call breaking the tension. "Excuse me."

I find myself breathless as I leave the room to enter the empty hallway, and feel hot tears on my cheeks as I'm overwhelmed by the loneliness I've been suppressing for so long without even realising it. 

How can I object to the Jedi's code of attachment when I've never even been in love? And yet here is Obi-Wan, carrying this weight in his heart that I could never understand and still obeying the code completely.

"Rhea?" I hear her asking and sniffle, wiping the tears away as he did before.

"I'm here," I say and force a smile, even though she cannot see me. "How are you?"

"Safe," she answers. "A boy has given us shelter from the storm, he's quite nice, the people here are welcoming, even if they are slaves."

She's always had a heart so big, and so did I once.

"I'm glad you are safe," I tell her. "Everything is fine here."

"You don't sound fine," she replies and asks "What's wrong?"

"The past always finds a way of coming back Padme, know that," I tell her and breathe, knowing even if I've never been loved in the way I crave that I have her and Sola. "I love you more than life, you know that."

"Of course I know that," she promises me. "I love you too."

Tears continue wetting my face. "I'll see you when you get back, okay?"

"Okay."

The communication ends and I'm crying, desperate to protect her and Sola, not out of fear of losing them, but just wanting to make everything okay for her so she never feels what I do. So she never has to know what it is to be thrown away and discarded, by your family, by the people who raised you, only to grow up and find that it was all for nothing. 

Because despite everything, I'm still alone inside.

~

It's late when Obi-Wan finds me outside, watching the setting Tatooine suns in contemplation, feeling the force more strongly than I have in years.

"It's a sight isn't it," he remarks, but I can hear the worry in his voice.

"It is."

I feel his hand on my arm, his voice gentle. "You should come inside, it gets cold at night here."

"Not colder than space," I reply, taking a moment just to stand there with him, with another person who understands the conflict in my mind. "I'm glad I've met you Obi-Wan."

"And I you," he says and I look back at him, immediately feeling a sense of comfort. "It looks like we'll get to know each other better than we planned, this plan they've cooked up means we'll likely be here for a while longer."

"Do I even want to know?" I ask him and he sighs.

"It involves a child and podracing."

I laugh at the ridiculousness of it, deciding I don't want to know. "That's all I need to hear."

He notices the goosebumps on my arms, clothes designed for weather on Naboo, for training in the sun, not for places like this and takes his cloak, wrapping it around my shoulders. The familiar feeling of a Jedi's cloak is oddly comforting, although I suspect it is only because it's his.

His hand lingers on my arm, neither of us go to remove it as we look back towards the setting suns and I say "No matter how ugly a planet's society may be, or how corrupt, there's always beauty no matter what,and I'd rather stand here watching setting suns a thousand time's over and feel peace then dwell on fear and all that horridness."

I can hear the tragedy in my own words, at how with age I've become more of a Jedi than I ever intended, and he can feel it too. "

"You can feel it here can't you?" he asks, that peace. "The force."

My smile comes naturally to me. "The force as it should be. No rules or order. Just being. Just living with it and feeling it. How it should be." But there's also something else and I look in the direction Padme and Qui-Gon went. "But there's something strange here, you can feel it can't you?"

"I can, and so can Qui Gon," he tells me, it's then his transponder beeps and his hand slides up and down over the fabric covering my cold arm as he looks and answers it. "Master?"

"I need an analysis of this blood sample I'm sending you," Qui Gon says and we share a confused look before heading back on board the ship.

"Wait a minute," Obi-Wan says as we return to the empty cockpit to receive the transmission and I sit beside him, his cloak still wrapped around me. 

"I need a midichlorian count," Qui Gon tells us and my stomach sinks with a sick feeling. He's found a child, but it's forgotten the moment I look at Obi-Wan's screen.

"Is that real?" I exclaim as the results come through.

"It's off the charts?" Obi-Wan says in equal disbelief. "Over 20 000. Even Master Yoda doesn't have a midichlorian count that high."

I'm speechless, the two of us sharing a look as Qui Gon says "No Jedi has."

"That- that's impossible," I stammer.

"What does it mean?" Obi-Wan asks Qui Gon.

"I'm not sure," he answers and trails off. "I'll check in with you soon."

The connection ends and Obi-Wan and I stare at the screen, then look at each other as if making sure it's real, and no matter how many times he runs the test it's the same result.

"So," I finally say. "It seems Qui-Gon found that strange something in the force."

"That he has," he agrees and we share an alarmed look, not even able to imagine what this will mean and gets out a device to test it. "Let's test ours to make sure it's not a system error."

I nod in agreement and he takes samples from us both to run and I'm actually curious to see what mine is, the results come back almost immediately. Obi-Wan and I's count is within a few hundred of each other, his 13000 and mine 13800, higher than some masters but nothing exceptional, it's only a guide for raw ability. Skill and force mastery as we're constantly reminded are far more important than that count. 

Obi-Wan's may be lower than mine but with a decade more of proper training I have no doubts he'd best me in a fight using the force. I would win hand to hand with a saber, I know damn well I always surpassed even the best students in my training, but the force is something else.

"So, it works," I say, us coming to terms with the fact Qui-Gon has found the most powerful child known to the Jedi Order. "I think Master Yoda's going to finally die when he hears this."

He nods in agreement, equally stunned. "I don't know how my master always gets into these situations."

"I dare say it's no coincidence we landed here," I realise. "It does seems we may be here for a long while yet."

He nods, coming to that possibility too and I sigh, pulling his cloak tighter around me as I stand and he asks "Where are you going?"

"Outside," I tell him, not wanting to stay cooped up in the ship. "I want to look at the sky." He hesitates and I coax "Come on."

He follows me outside and I look up, having rarely seen any night skies but Naboo's or Coruscants, and finding it almost as beautiful as the twin suns.

"One thing about our galaxy is every planets sky is always different, some barren and others filled with more than our minds could ever comprehend," I begin and tell him "It's where I often feel the force most and remind myself it is in everything, every star and planet in the sky and all the space in between."

He comes to stand by my side and admits. "With all the rules I tend to forget the force is more than just the code."

I smile to myself, us finally on the same page. "It's something I only truly discovered after I left the order, when I had to search for it in every living thing to find it instead of being reminded of it every waking moment." He's looking at me as I look at the night sky. "I find I only truly understand it when I realise it isn't meant to be understood, but felt."

His face is drawn in contemplation and I wander forward from the ship to bask in it, finding myself one in it and extend my hand to him "Come on."

He comes to me and takes my hand, letting me guide it up towards the stars. "Tell me that meditation could ever make you feel as one with the force as when you just let yourself feel instead of focusing on the absence of feeling."

Our entire lives we've been trained to feel the force through the absence of all other emotions, to feel only nothing, instead of feeling everything without blocking anything out, and I watch as he lets himself finally feel all of it.

"Luminous beings," he begins and I feel a change within him. "It's what Qui-Gon once told me we are, it's easy to forget it."

"It is," I admit, his hand now in mine and only now consumed by the force do I feel something else, a white light between us. "And just like finding that boy, I do believe things happen for a reason. Leaving the order, finding you and ending up stranded here." I have to believe it, despite how my mind likes to fight with my instincts. "I forget it, I get angry and hostile and forget everything I've ever been taught but somehow on quiet nights looking up at the galaxy I manage to find it."

All this time I've been lost, but finally I feel as if with him coming into my life I'm being pulled by the force in his direction, and I trust it. 

He squeezes my hand and I finally look at him, finding galaxies in his eyes. A man I fought so fervently with, all for the sake of letting my hatred loose, and now finding little of that left in my heart. 

I feel drunk on starlight now as I finally stop fighting my mind and let myself feel, pulling him down to the ground with me where we lay on our backs side by side to take it all in. 

"Do you feel it?" I ask him, the strangeness that we've both felt, not just in a boy miles away, but in the space between us.

I don't need to clarify just what it is I feel as he confirms "I feel it too."

He's the one now who guides my hand having studied the star maps, pointing out the distant star systems and nearer moons, both of us smiling and laughing into the night, our hearts lighter than I knew they could ever be. My own having never felt such pure peace in its nineteen years.

I look over at him as he explains something about the moons orbital cycle and find myself more entranced by him as I study his face in the moonlight, I don't know for just how long I do so until he turns his head towards me and whatever words he's saying are forgotten when he catches my eye and I feel my breath hitch. 

For just a moment I see a flash of something in his eyes, a hesitation, both of us knowing in the back of our minds this is everything we were always cautioned against, but it disappears with the feeling of the force and I see him let himself feel it, all of it, instead of trying to focus on the absence of emotion.

All I know as I look into his eyes is that this is that forbidden fruit, utterly unexpected and yet almost as if it has to be the will of the force in how we came to meet and unlike how I was told it would feel. There's no fear, no pain, nothing of the sort.

Only light.

~

The suns have risen as I stir awake and find my head resting on something unfamiliar and open my eyes to find my head resting on his shoulder, slowly feeling his arm around me and feel the weight of his cloak draped over us, not remembering quite how we ended up like this but vaguely remembering something about being cold. 

"Obi-Wan?" I murmur, and feel his hand smoothing over my hair. "What time is it?"

"Morning," he answers from the light that hits us, sounding like he's not long woken up himself. "It seems we dozed off."

I laugh softly. "No shit."

His hand is touching my cheek as I look up at him, a gentle smile on my face that quickly disappears the moment we realise just how wrong this is despite how right it feels and I suddenly go to sit up, sand falling out of my hair and he has to help me up as I twice at my stiff muscles.

"Up you get, there you go," he says with a hand on my back and we're both laughing quietly to try to ease the tension that is utterly different to how it was when we got on that ship. "Sleep well?"

"Better than I have in days," I answer truthfully, it being the first night I haven't laid awake in either frustration or fear. "And thankfully the world hasn't fallen apart while I did."

"Don't say that too soon," he cautions. "Our lives are depending on a nine year old with a podracer."

"Don't remind me," I say having to laugh from the ridiculousness of it. "Oh Obi-Wan, we are in quite the mess aren't we."

"That we are," he says, but it's with the accidental brush of his fingers along my spine I'm blushing and he looks around as if just remembering where we are. "But it seems we got the easier part of the mission, guarding the ship."

It's then I can feel something on the tip of my tongue. "Obi-Wan, Obi- Ben? Old Ben Kenobi!" I yell out in sudden realisation. "I do remember!"

"Oh no," he groans. "Masters nickname for me when I was younger."

I'm laughing as I finally realise why I couldn't place him despite knowing Qui-Gon. "Oh now I remember Master Qui Gon mentioning you, he kept calling you old Ben- I truly thought he meant an old man not you."

"Because he said I had the soul of a old man," I'm almost crying from laughter, still half asleep. "It's not funny!"

"It really is because it's true," I laugh and he laughs with me as I reach out to touch his face after having spent the night looking into those bright eyes. "You are an old soul Ben Kenobi,  but a beautiful one of that." At the colour that comes to his face I give him a thoughtless peck on the cheek and I get to my feet, a little dizzy, but happy. "Now we better actually check the ship's still intact."

I grab his hand to pull him to his feet and we walk through the ship with a newfound ease with one another, finding the pilots and security also at ease and the handmaidens giggling like the fourteen year old girls they should be, and I'm wondering from the looks they share as I walk past if they caught me outside with him.

"See, we're still flying half a ship," he says as we look around, everything in order.

"Except it's not flying that's the problem," I remind him and we head back outside to check everything out there is alright, no Tuskan Raiders creeping up on us.

I smile up at the suns kissing my face, feeling Obi-Wan slide his cloak off my shoulder's so I can feel the sun on my skin and smile up them as I bathe in it.

"Oh that is beautiful," I smile, craving the warmth it gives me and know I truly was built for Naboo's weath.

"It's not the only thing," he murmurs as if he half expected the words to remain in his head and I can't help the smile on my face as I look at him, standing there and looking at me in a way I can only call awe. 

"Is that so?"

"You're made for the sun," he tells me and after a moment of contemplation continues. "Tan skin, dark hair and those big brown eyes of yours, you look as if you could bathe in it forever and you'd only grow richer from it."

His words leave me speechless and I manage to get out "I didn't realise you were so poetic Obi-Wan Kenobi."

"And I didn't realise Rhea Naberrie was well, you."

"Me?" I question, suddenly confused and he elaborates.

"You aren't the only one who remembered some things, I remember the fuss now when you left,' he reveals, finally having placed me just as I've placed him. "They called you reckless and even dangerous but looking at you now, you couldn't be further from that."

"Reckless or dangerous?" I tease but the look in his eyes makes my breath catch in my throat.

"Well you might be a little reckless, certainly a whole lot of trouble but not dangerous," he tells me, and he might be the first person, or at least the first Jedi, who has looked at me and seen what I never could. "I have no doubt you'd be deadly in a fight, you're a Jedi after all, but there's no darkness, none of that, just light."

Now I am truly speechless, especially so as he extends his saber to me and I look up at him "Obi-Wan..."

"Go on," he says with a warm smile. "I know you miss it."

He places his saber in my hands, a sign of trust, and the rush that goes through me as I ignite it brings tears to my eyes and I smile at the blue light, and at him. 

"I do- I do miss it," I breathe, feeling it in my soul. "I truly do miss it."

"Then perhaps there's a way," he proposes and there he is, a light I never expected. "A way you could become a Jedi again." 

Hope.

And something in me causes me to throw my arms around his neck, on the tips of my toes to reach, the saber in my hand hope materialised. When I pull back to look at him I can feel the space around us slow, his touch almost overwhelming as he holds my cheek, as my hand wraps around the back of his neck, and I realise what it is to be lost in someone's eyes.

It's in that very moment as the light is so blinding I can't feel anything else and as I search his eyes I realise just what it is I've been searching for since leaving the order, and it's right in front of me. Whether it's him, or the force, or something else. It's going to be with him. 

"Rhea," he begins as we become aware of this strange feeling between us until he looks past me, feeling it just before I do.

"What is it?" I ask him, unable to determine it myself.

"I'm not sure," he answers. "But it's something strange." He looks at me before removing my hand from the back of his neck only to take it in his own. "Come on, let's find out what it is."

Quietly we make our way through the desert, the force calling us over to the horizon and we trek until we find a cave that looks unsuspecting enough but still he draws his saber and discreetly puts himself in front of me. 

We expect something, anything, but when we enter we find it utterly empty, which confuses us both as we walk through it. 

It's only when Obi-Wan stops I realise he's in pain.

"Obi-Wan?"

"I feel grief," he tells me as he walks through it. "Agony."

"I- I don't feel any of that," I say quietly, seeing only the light that breaks through the holes in the roof. "I just feel... relief, the type of relief that makes you want to cry, I-" 

I find myself lost for words as I put a hand over my heart at the emotions that come to me, stronger than anything I've ever felt or knew I could feel, even if it's relief it's accompanied by agony just the same. 

He looks back at me and I realise he's feeling it too as he reaches for his own heart. 

"Obi-" I begin as I step forward as he grimaces. "Obi-Wan."

"I'm alright," he tries to insist but we both know he's not. "It's just- I've never felt anything like this."

"Neither have I," I say and reach for his hand with the need to hold onto something for stability. 

"Are you alright?" he asks me as if he doesn't look as if he's about to collapse under the weight of the agony he feels. "Rhea?"

"I'm fine," I assure him, faring better than he is at least and see him looking around the cave with a pure dread. "Obi-Wan?"

He shakes his head and I hold onto him as begins "This..." he trails off unable to find the words.

"What is this?" I find myself whispering, the emotions I feel, I wish I could say they weren't my own but I know somehow that they are. 

"I don't know but I don't like it," he answers shortly and grasps my hand tight in his. "We're leaving."

I don't argue with him as we leave the cave behind and yet as I look back over my shoulder I leave with a knowing that someday we'll return to it. 

Neither of us acknowledges what we felt inside of there as we quickly make our way back to the ship, each of us with a newfound eagerness to get off this strange planet and just as we reach it we see them in the distance and I look at him in astonishment.

They did it.

"Rhea!" I hear Padme calling out and I let go of him to run forward towards her and she practically jumps into my arms. "We're back."

"Did you get it?"

"We got it," she smiles up at me and I instinctively look back at Obi-Wan, smiling in relief as I meet his eyes and nod in confirmation, hugging her again as Qui-Gon comes. Once the commotion has eased we realise Qui-Gon is not staying.

"Master?"

"I'm going back," he tells Obi-Wan and me. "Some unfinished business, I won't be long."

Obi-Wan sarcastically remarks "Why do I sense we've picked up another pathetic lifeform?"

"Don't insult Jar Jar," I retort, both of us laughing and Qui-Gon chuckles.

"I'm glad you two are finally getting along. It's the boy who's responsible for getting us these parts," he tells us and we quickly remember him, having forgotten about the boy with a midichlorian count that should not be possible after the events of the evening. "Get this hyperdrive generator installed."

"Yes Master," Obi-Wan says. "That shouldn't take long."

Qui-Gon goes again as quickly as he came, and we happily get to work.

~

I sit on top of the hyperdrive generator while Obi-Wan works on replacing the parts.

"You know what, I'm going to try to be optimistic and not worry about the ordeal that's going to be the senate until we actually get there," I tell him as I pass him the tools he needs. "But that being said I am worrying a lot."

"Your planet is under invasion, it would be strange if you weren't worrying," he replies as my legs dangle off the edge. "You quite happy up there at least?"

"Very," I answer, trying to make it last. "How are you going down there."

"Almost done," he answers and he lifts me off the generator by the waist, his hands lingering as he asks "Can you go check to see if Master Qui-Gon's near, he's been gone a while I'm starting to worry."

"Of course," I answer, still sensing some residual grief from that cave and peck his cheek again as I leave him to finish fixing the generator, but the moment I walk down the platform I know something isn't right. 

My eyes catch a droid nearby, a surveillance probe, and my stomach drops knowing we're the only thing in miles it would be looking at. My instincts kick in, whether it's from the Hutt's or someone else I shoot it down and at the sound of the blaster shot Obi-Wan runs out.

"Rhea!"

I turn back to him, blaster still in hand and warn "Somebody's been watching us."

It's then both our heads whip around to the sound of a speeder and we see Qui-Gon running towards us with a boy following and a speeder not far behind.

"Anakin drop!"

The boy drops to the ground while I fire on the speeder, only for Obi-Wan to grab me in equal horror as a red blade emerges, clashing with Qui-Gons green saber.

"Go!" Qui-Gon yells out. "Tell them to take off."

It's then me grabbing Obi-Wan, dragging him back to the ship and he remains calmer than I would be if that was my master, ordering the pilot to fly low so we can escape rather than fight, and I stare down at the red and black man who meets my eye and all I feel is pure darkness as Qui-Gon manages to jump on board and we disappear into the atmosphere.

"Master!" I yell out, Obi-Wan and I coming to Qui-Gons side while the boy yells out for him.

"I'm alright," he assures us, out of breath. "Or at least I think so."

"What was that?" Obi-Wan asks, my hand on his shoulder as I stand over them.

"I'm not sure," Qui-Gon admits. "But it was well trained in the Jedi arts, my guess is it was after the queen."

I feel Obi-Wans hand reaching out for mine now as I curse under my breath and the little boy asks "What are we gonna do about it?"

Qui Gon sighs and says "We shall be patient."

"Patient!" I snap, spinning back around and feel Obi-Wan trying to calm me down. "Whatever it is is after my sister and you're saying we should be patient?"

"There's not much else we can do right now," Obi-Wan tells me, hands gripping my arms to keep me in place. "Remember what you said about not worrying."

I narrow my eyes at him but don't argue, as at peace with the force as I may be in his presence when my sister is involved that goes right out the window. 

"If we see it again, it's dead," I say and he gives a permitting nod, not arguing with that after it tried to kill his master. 

"Anakin Skywalker," I hear Qui-Gon say and turn my attention to the boy he's taken. "Meet Obi-Wan Kenobi."

"Hi," the boy says happily, shaking Obi-Wans hand. "You're a Jedi too? Pleased to meet you."

The apprehension I had when we heard about the boy eases when I see he's happy and considering he was most likely a slave I have no arguments but Obi-Wan and I both look at each other when we realise his age. I was taken at six and this boy would be even older than that, nine or so maybe, far too old and yet everything on this planet has been nothing but strange.

"Anakin, meet the Queen's sister Rhea," Qui-Gon says to the boy and he happily shakes my hand as well. 

"Pleased to meet you too," he says and tells me "You look like Padme."

I chuckle and so does Obi-Wan, the boy's bright or at least fascinated with my sister.

"I'm pleased to meet you Anakin," I say and check him over to make sure he's not hurt after that ordeal. "Come on, let's get you some water."

~

With everyone back on board and hours now into our journey to the capital I stand with Padme as she watches the transmission we received while she was away, her face stone as most of the crew sleeps. 

"We determined it was a trick to provoke us into giving up our location," I tell her, but it makes little difference. "We don't know if the reports of the death toll are true."

"But they could be," she says and her attention is only taken away from the matter by the boy sitting nearby and I watch as she goes over to him, her compassion stronger than her fear.

"Are you alright?" she asks him.

Only now the reality of leaving home is sinking in for the boy and I watch with concern as he says "It's very cold."

I watch as she brings him over a blanket and feel a familiar hand on my shoulder. 

"You look cold as well."

I run a hand down my bare arms, not protesting as he wraps his cloak around me. 

"The boy's right, space is cold," I say turning to Obi-Wan, leaving Padme with Anakin. "Is Qui-Gon alright?"

"Thankfully yes," he answers and asks me "But are you?"

In all honesty I shake my head. "My planet has been invaded and now someone who is trained in the Jedi arts is after my sister. I'm far from alright."

"Come on," he says guiding me somewhere quiet. "You should be sleeping, or at least resting. Once we reach the capital I suspect we won't be getting much."

"There's not many places to sleep on a ship like this," I yawn, despite having slept well I dare say we spent the better half of the night awake with one another. "Padme's only fourteen and dealing with all of this and more, she needs me."

"She has her handmaidens and you both need sleep," he says, likely knowing the sleep I got with him in the night was all I've had in days. Now I've had a little my body craves more, it craves it with him beside me. 

We sit down together in the engine room, warmth radiating from the shield generator and I turn my head to look at him, us shoulder to shoulder, and notice the tiredness in his own face. The grief that's been there since we walked into that cave.

"So do you."

"Well come on then," he says, wrapping an arm around me with the excuse of keeping me warm and immediately he puts me at ease in a way that no one else ever has. "Let's sleep."

"Let's sleep," I repeat, him taking me in his arms enough that my head rests comfortably against his shoulder, both of us finding comfort in one another and I swear as I fall asleep I feel his lips on my forehead. 

"Sweet dreams."

And I smile it back as I slip into sleep. "Sweet dreams."

[cactusringed]

IM asking you to ramble about bg3 au and autism blast everywhere. and makeout and how sexy and funny you are.

I love you both so much our wedding is coming soon

Anyway OK listen. Listen to me okay Bg3 refers to baldurs gate 3 and for all you need to know it's a dnd video game where the characters get infected with literal brain worms which should have turned them into murderous cultists, but somehow they got spared that fate, and come together to get rid of their brain worms

The party is made of

Grian: a gnome druid whose preferred wild shape is a bird and who might have some hidden aasimar origins because Grian HAS to be God's favorite princess all the time

Scar: an elf ranger who was torn away from his family when he was kidnapped by illithids, and whose closest bro Cub (a warlock who's made a pact with archfaes) was also infected but sadly was turned into a cultist. Scar is desperately looking for him.

Scott: a tiefling bard/sorcerer who does most of the group's talking with npcs both due to his travels making him the more knowledgeable of the group about the region but also because as a bard you can do wild shit like just convince really powerful entities to just kill themselves for fun and that's a very Scott thing to do

Mumbo: a half drow artificer who tbh is the most normal of the group (as far as everyone knows anyway)

Jimmy: half aarakocra (bird :D) vampire cringefail rogue who. Well yeah he's a stand in for astarion me and my friend just wanted a cringefail vampire with negative charisma ok

Joel: A half elf barbarian who has a little secret. The secret is that he's a murderous bastard. But like in the most literal sense of the word

Joel's role specifically has me so mentally ill. Okay. So like. You need a teensy bit of lore for this ok and this will include spoilers for baldy gate 3 if the 2.5 people who read this far intend to play the viddy game well stop reading but still kiss me on the mouth.

So the Lore has many gods and the gods are just real tangible all powerful beings. Much like with Greek mythos, you following a specific god isn't because you only believe in that God, but because you're most devoted to them. Well that's how I see it anyway. And there are three gods associated with death and evil (it's more complicated than that in my hc but we don't have time). One of them is Bhaal. And Bhaal, get this, is the most metal fucking fictional god I've seen because he's the god of MURDER.

Something something he had to give birth to people called Bhaalspawn for some reason who are his direct children and carry a piece of him within them or something (Bg/dnd superfans don't come at me) and it's all part of his grand plan to take over the world. WHATEVER

But Joel IS a bhaalspawn. And he was Bhaal's specialest most favorite bhaalspawn. And now, okay, the thing about bhaalspawns is that they're not actually inherently evil, but they do carry that part of Bhaal within them - his will, and his potential for power. Some Bhaalspawn are raised specifically to be daddy's best little murderers and of course that's how Joel was brought up.

He was examplary because he was trained to be. He was capable of some of the most rancid bloodshed because it was what he was taught, and rewarded for. He was created to be murder incarnate, so any other emotions (love, empathy, etc) were shunned until Joel was either incapable of it, or refused to show it.

Except something happened. He got betrayed, usurped, and infected with the aforementioned brainworms which led to his memory loss. What did remain, even as he escaped the ship keeping him captive, even as he joined up with other infected survivors, was... A primal need. Like it was coded in his DNA, like it was in his blood itself: he had a need to kill. Not just kill, but spread misery, spread pain, and acquire power at any cost. He mostly unleashes those urges onto his enemies, but it never feels like enough. Like a scratch he can't quite itch. Of course, that's all Bhaal trying to reel him back in, Bhaal trying to reclaim him.

But like clockwork - because such ingrained training doesn't go away no matter how much one thinks they forgot - he finds himself relishing in it. In the violence of it all. The only time he feels truly alive is when he's covered in blood and gut.

... That is, until he finds himself growing closer and closer to Jimmy. After a night where Jimmy, desperately trying to hide his very obvious identity as a vampire but also desperately hungry, tries to feed off of Joel, and reveals his secret... Well, Joel had all rights to kill him right then and there. He reasons that there's no fun in killing someone so helpless but in truth there's something a bit charming about Jimmy. He's earnest, and he's just so... Not exactly innocent, but also sort of? He gives Joel to urge to protect him. To hold him so tight and close as to choke him. But in a sweet way. Probably.

Joel won't be able to put it into words for a long while yet, half because he refuses to let himself feel such things because he's so horrifically repressed. He was the only one at camp who didn't even guess Jimmy was a vampire before the big reveal because he's got negative int and wis (his strategy in battle is just hit things hard before they can hit you and honestly it works most of the time) so he'd just never noticed the obvious signs. Anyway. Because his blood is the tastiest and somehow he's one of the companions who acts the least weird about it, which really says a lot, Jimmy ends up mostly feeding off of him. And, well, something about letting your homie regularly suck blood out of your neck is bound to lead to something more. Joel becomes a bit possessive of his little birdie.

When Joel learns that he's Bhaal's special little princess, in truth he's fucking elated, because he spends weeks torturing himself in an attempt to remember who he is, what he's doing, what's wrong with him - and he's finally afforded answers. He leans fully into it. He's so happy to serve his God with bloodshed.

Until he's faced with him. With Bhaal. And after Joel committed countless atrocities (which the rest of their group didn't mind that much as lokgi as they stayed in the clear. They're all bad people) bhaal asks him to shed one last bit of blood before receiving his blessing, before becoming his chosen, he who will enact the murder God's plans. He needs to get rid of his pesky earthly desires and affections. They have no place within murder incarnate. He asks Joel to flat out kill Jimmy or die right here and then.

You'd think Joel would hesitate with how intensely pro-Bhaal he is. You'd think it would be a difficult decision. Jimmy would have thought too. Except that Joel's response is instant and intense. He tells Bhaal to go literally fuck himself, that he'd rather kill every last Bhaalspawn and make sure his bloodline ends with him, rather than lay a finger on Jimmy. Jimmy, whose helped his heavy heart feel so light and free. Jimmy, who makes him feel true warmth. Jimmy, who makes Joel want to appreciate every sunset, every breeze, every breath of fresh air. Jimmy, who treats Joel as so much more than a bloodthirsty beast.

Joel never thought he would want to be anything more than a bloodthirsty beast.

So of course Bhaal kills him because he's literally a god. Right in front of Jimmy. (there's plot and dnd magic that brings him back but it's definitely the culmination of his arc; that Joel, groomed to become murder incarnate, was given an opportunity to find another meaning to his life)

Also they have CRAZY sex

[clown-moss]

Alright this is going to be a rant so if you're here for X N stuff scroll past this post and look for the other stuff.

I'm so tired of how people portray N, he's not a damsel in destress, he's not a sexgod, for fuck sakes he's a man who has been groomed for years of his life to be a king of a fucking terrorist cult only to be betrayed by the man he STILL calls his father. Don't even get me started on the porn of him because the amount I've found is sickening, even searching his name on Google gives YOU A FUCKING BODY PILLOW. I understand, he's hot and pretty but for Arceus above THATS NOT HIS ONLY TRAIT.

The Zoroark theory, the fucking Zoroark theory. I love Zoroark alright? Zoroark is my favourite Pokemon but fucking hell, "he acts different from other people meaning he's a Zoroark!" HES AUTISTIC CODED. DO YOU PEOPLE JUST LOVE TO IGNORE THAT!? I'm so sick of seeing that theory, it's just covered up fucking ableism, it's fucking insulting to even see it pop up on the tags.

FerrisWheel and Isshushipping. I swear to fucking Arceus, you know what? I ain't going to try and hide it anymore, I'm the N fictive and yes I was talking in third person because that'll be the only way you idiots would even remotely understand but oh my god. THEY'RE FOURTEEN, FOURTEEN. IM TWENTY! No matter what tricks and pulls you play with them I'm still SIX years older than them, do you know how disgusting it is to even have that filth grace my eyes? I swear a piece of me dies on the inside each time I see it but what do I honestly expect out of humanity at this point.

I'm not done, you know masters EX right? Compare our heights, go ahead I'll wait. They're both children, I'm a grown man. I see excuses like, "I thought N was 18!" THAT DOESNT MAKE IT BETTER THATS STILL A 4 YEARS AGE GAP! "I aged White/Black up!" That's still a fucking child you disgusting piece of scum. It doesn't matter what you do they'll still a child and it just makes you look like more of a disgusting person trying to hide it.

I've even seen some people "embrace" the fact that it's proshipping, some saying that I'd "coax" White/Black into proshipping, is that what I am to you? A joke!? A CREEP!? I understand that my character is hard to understand BUT COME ON, Google is your friend people! I've gone days ranting to a friend of mine about how disgusting some of you are, do you think I would LIKE creatures like you!? I would NEVER love a minor let alone a human of any kind and especially not you bottom feeders who ship the pair of us.

Also stop infantilising me, just stop it's not cool or cute, it's sickening. I came onto this app because I genuinely love the way some people perceive me, it's like a fun way of looking straight into their imagination but honestly? Some of your imaginations are stomach churning, it's sad really. The way people draw me with either Reshiram or Rekrom, the battles, the tears, I love it dearly but it's truly being ruined by people like those things I described before. Some of the Isshushipping and Ferriswheelshipping art is so amazing and pretty too but it's being wasted on something so disgusting, the story telling too is just amazing but why make it on an illegal ship? I just don't understand why you people would ever do that?

I know I'm just wasting my breath writing this but I just needed to get it off my chest before I explode.

- Mod N

[microsuedemouse]

tagged by @womanaction!!! I love a tag!!!

1. three ships: oh my god. just three? okay well… in the last few days or so. I have thought about. Jyn Erso/Cassian Andor from Rogue One bc god do I love their Doomed Chemistry. Aki Hayakawa/Himeno from Chainsaw Man bc I was catching up on the anime last night and their history and connection is definitely not healthy but golly does it compel me. and uhhh. oh. Annie Edison/Abed Nadir bc I was feeling STUPID squishy a few days ago and wanted to revisit one of my favourite soft ships.

2. first ship ever: oh christ. I’ve been getting too invested in fictional couples since long before I ever knew about fandom. since before I can even remember. uh. if I reach back as far as I can in my brain, I think the earliest ship I can recall caring about is… hm. well. I remember being a small child and thinking that Ord and Cassie from Dragon Tales should fall in love? so.

that said I also grew up on Disney movies and got invested in the romances in those too. so who’s to say. what I know for sure is that I’ve been unbearably romantic literally from toddlerhood; my parents can confirm.

3. currently listening: been back on my non-stop Motion City Soundtrack bullshit for a few days. tho I’m also really enjoying the latest single from Blanks! it’s called Breathe In Breathe Out and it’s very. relevant. at the moment.

4. last movie: a couple nights ago I went to a local film festival screening bc my friend had an entry in the shorts section (she won best short film btw!!!) and the feature film they played that night was a local indie horror called SHIFTED, released last year. it fucked. I bought a copy of the movie and a poster, and two of the actors signed it for me! one of the other actors followed me on ig tonight also lol? (after I put a pic of the poster in my story and tagged the studio.) anyway I hope they score some kind of wide release bc I think more people should get to enjoy it

5. currently reading: HORRORSTÖR by Grady Hendrix. it’s been on my wishlist for years, and Hendrix just put out another new book I rly wanna read, so to prevent myself from spending the money on an expensive newly-released book, I bought a less-expensive several-years-old book. I make very good budget decisions. (I’m really enjoying it so far.)

6. currently watching: aheh. well. on my own I’m still working my way through Hawaii Five-0 (2010). with Mo I’m, uh, rewatching Angel, as well as following Chainsaw Man, To Your Eternity, SPY x FAMILY, and BNHA. our Ben 10 and Darker than Black watches have been on the backburner for a good while now but are technically still ongoing. we’re also following MP100 with Corwin. I… think that’s everything?

7. currently consuming: nothing right this moment but I think I’m gonna go downstairs and get my baguette out of the fridge. I want Bread

8. currently craving: human connection???? lmfao it sounds like I’m goofing but ngl I really need to spend more time with people. I love my family so much but I cannot carry on much longer with them being the Only People I spend leisure time with. oof. how are new friends made

okay I’m supposed to tag nine people I ~want to get to know better~ but I really don’t have that many folks TO tag. so uh. @izupie @silluuuu @karis-the-fangirl you can each pretend to be three people right? 8)

[littlemissluxiey]

Sometimes, We are so DISTRACTED that the mission gets NEGLECTED.

‭‭2 Timothy‬ ‭2:3‭-‬4‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[3] Join with me in suffering, like a good soldier of Christ Jesus. [4] No one serving as a soldier gets entangled in civilian affairs, but rather tries to please his commanding officer.

Ex: Royal Guard

RUN AWAY

how will you respond to God's call?

Just like Jonah, we also have MISSION from God.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭1:1‭-‬2‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[1] The word of the Lord came to Jonah son of Amittai: [2] “Go to the great city of Nineveh and preach against it, because its wickedness has come up before me.”

Make sure that the things you want to do is indeed commanded BY GOD, not your PERSONAL agenda.

There is no SUFFICIENT alternative for your relationship with God than with spending time with him EVERY DAY.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭1:3‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[3] But Jonah ran away from the Lord and headed for Tarshish. He went down to Joppa, where he found a ship bound for that port. After paying the fare, he went aboard and sailed for Tarshish to flee from the Lord.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭1:4‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[4] Then the Lord sent a great wind on the sea, and such a violent storm arose that the ship threatened to break up.

Disobedience to GOD doesn't only affect you, but also OTHERS AROUND YOU.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭1:7‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[7] Then the sailors said to each other, “Come, let us cast lots to find out who is responsible for this calamity.” They cast lots and the lot fell on Jonah.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭1:8‭-‬9‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[8] So they asked him, “Tell us, who is responsible for making all this trouble for us? What kind of work do you do? Where do you come from? What is your country? From what people are you?” [9] He answered, “I am a Hebrew and I worship the Lord, the God of heaven, who made the sea and the dry land.”

FACT: the outside world looks at what is seen. God looks at what is UNSEEN. Excel on BOTH.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭1:13‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[13] Instead, the men did their best to row back to land. But they could not, for the sea grew even wilder than before.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭1:15‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[15] Then they took Jonah and threw him 15overboard, and the raging sea grew calm.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭1:16‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[16] At this the men greatly feared the Lord, and they offered a sacrifice to the Lord and made vows to him.

You cannot HOSTAGE God's mission.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭1:17‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[17] Now the Lord provided a huge fish to swallow Jonah, and Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights.

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭2:6‭-‬10‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[6] To the roots of the mountains I sank down; the earth beneath barred me in forever. But you, Lord my God, brought my life up from the pit. [7] “When my life was ebbing away, I remembered you, Lord, and my prayer rose to you, to your holy temple. [8] “Those who cling to worthless idols turn away from God’s love for them. [9] But I, with shouts of grateful praise, will sacrifice to you. What I have vowed I will make good. I will say, ‘Salvation comes from the Lord.’ ” [10] And the Lord commanded the fish, and it vomited Jonah onto dry land.

STOP ABUSING THE GRACE OF GOD

They're not our enemy, they needed our compassion not rejection

‭‭Jonah‬ ‭4:11‬ ‭NIV‬‬

[11] And should I not have concern for the great city of Nineveh, in which there are more than a hundred and twenty thousand people who cannot tell their right hand from their left and also many animals?”

Sometimes, the greatest hindrance of us not doing the mission is OURSELVES and our PERSONAL AGENDAS.

[d-lissa]

Liveblogging TMA - Season 2 - MAG 41-45

"Trust can get you killed."

TOO DEEP :

First episode of season 2 !

Or otherwise called "Jon's Paranoid Era". Here's to hoping it's just a phase.

When I first started the episode, I thought that Jonathan sounded kind of unstable in his statement, unhinged in a way that didn't suit him.

Turns out, he is ! But he is also aware of it, and self aware enough to use it to his advantage and make people focus on the wrong things. Which is good, I think, though I'd rather he wouldn't be alone in this endeavour.

He won't be for long, I'm sure, but knowing that Not-Sasha is here is putting me on edge, and I am glad that she is not aware of what he's planning. If Martin or Tim were, I'm sure they'd probably end babbling about it to her.

Elias is not even worth thinking of.

Robert Smirke and his architecture have made a comeback, and a new mystery is to be added. The tunnels, and who controls them. Is it the being that is watching him ? But then, why would it, whatever it is, go look through the files whenever nobody's there, as shown in the trailer ? What was it doing before the tunnels were discovered, was it trapped there ? Surely not, if Gertrude went there herself.

If she did at all, anyway.

The plot is advancing, and Jonathan's sanity has taken a plundge. Personally, while I do think that Prentiss is dead, it doesn't mean that the Hive is, I am calling bullshit on this one.

Still, entertaining episode and strong season opener.

Onto the next one !

GRIFTER'S BONE :

HELL YES MUSIC BABY !

Music so beautiful, it makes you violent, music so good, it makes you kill yourself because you just know that you will never hear anything as good ever again and what's the point of living if you can't ?

Oh, I loved this one.

Not much else to say about the oddity though. Grifter has probably made the same kind of contract or whatever it was that Angela from "Piecemeal" jiggsaw demon did, the ability to make the most beautiful music at the price of the lives of the people who hear it, or something like that.

A little cameo of the Dreamer (or Oliver as his name probably is), trying to warn the poor girl before it's too late.

The things stubborness and curiosity makes us do.

Speaking of Jon though, our dear is slipping more and more, he already sounds more perturbed than in the last episode, but to be fair to him, what the fuck was even that Martin ? I am going toassume that his mother is dead or something, otherwise why he wouldn't just send her a text and have a conversation with her is beyond me.

For what it's worth, I am pretty positive that Martin isn't the one who killed Gertrude. Again, I don't trust him, but that's mostly because I don't really believe that people like him exist without hiding something, which was confirmed this episode !

Whether or not his secret is dangerous is another matter though.

Pretty sure his sudden bouts of mastery is just his dedication trying to impress Jonathan though.

Those two are probably SO shipped by the fandom, I just know it.

SECTION 31 :

"The words you learn to look out for are “weird”, “odd”, “strange” and if you hear the phrase “I’m not quite sure what I’m looking at”, then yeah, you’re not getting much back-up."

EVERYONE SHUT UP, JON MADE A JOKE !!

Oh my God, we're getting more lore on the functionning of society in TMA, I am screaming. This is amazing, perfection, show stopping. I need more of that, please and thank you, gimma aaaaall the world building. I do want to learn more about the oddities, but I also really want to know how the world outside of the Institute works. Let Jonathan have a supernatural cop buddy.

He's already so alone, and so tired and unsettled. Let him get a friend that he is sure won't be coming after him.

Anyway, we got the name of the man from "First Aid", the one calling for the scorching demon, lightless light, whatever its name is.

The way the police force work is fascinating though.

Basira probably have been implicated in some of the statements we read. I remember some mentionning a female cop ? But considering that those never got really resolved, I have to assume that she didn't even realize that they were genuine cases. Working with Jonathan could potentially broaden her horizons quite a bit, and maybe she could learn the ways to actually protect people from those oddities.

I wonder, was she the one who went on to check on Not-Garam, from "Across the Street" ? If, maybe, she suspected something, I wonder if she would get implicated in the Not-Sasha thing, then.

And what happened to the Leitner of Diego Molina, that made Spencer kill himself ? Did Diego get it back ? Before getting killed by Gerard, anyway.

Plus, the whole guy who tried to kill himself. I have genuinely no clue as to what is happening here, maybe another immortal like the one in "Cheating Death" trying to die ? What with the ancient looking dominos in glass cases. She never mentionned anything happening after that. Maybe it was the same guy that made the statement, actually ! Nathaniel Thorp. I guess he was tired, and decided that living in hell wasn't actually worth it, compared to death.

I could see it.

From the little list, we also got spider-husks ("Arachnophobia" link ?) and vampires ("Obviously, from "Vampire Killer". I wonder if she ever met the hunter before he died.).

Lots of call backs and links to be made, that the police never realized because they never got a hand on those statements. Fascinating.

But anyway, next episode !

Considering the title, am I to understand we'll get a "Circus of the Other" statement ?

TIGHTROPE :

HOLY SHIT IT'S A GERTRUDE'S RECORDING !!

~~~~~~~~~~

"I wouldn’t have had to find this tape player tucked away in the storage room, covered in dust and cobwebs."

And it was, indeed, a "Circus of the Other" sighting ! Grandiose.

Great episode, as usual. This season didn't have a boring one yet, it's amazing.

I didn't expect to get a Gertrude's statement full on so early, but it was amazing. I really enjoyed her voice, though I kind of felt that Jonathan somewhat put more ... I don't know, emotions to them ? She did too, but the difference between her voice as she recites the statement and her archivist voice isn't as ... Stark as Jon's is, at least to me.

Still, it is there, and means that whatever is pushing Jon to make the statements the way he does has been here for a long, long time, and doing the same for each and every of the archivists.

More information on the circus, which I have been curious about, especially considering that whatever has destroyed statements at the end of last season took the time to destroy the one about the calliope. It never really made sense, and it still doesn't, to be honnest.

More about Denikin, the granfather who had the calliope, and who was apparently pretty violent and evil ? Considering where he was working at anyway. So what, one day he just decided he didn't want to murder and defigurate people to put them in a show with his friends and just ... Retired ? No consequences ? Peaceful end of his life ?

Goddamn.

What was the goal of this circus though ? And why did they suddenly decide to come to England ? Between Denikin and Breekon and Hope, does this mean the others from the circus troupe, (the ones that were actually crew and not puppets or disfigured victims at least) also came to England ? Is it because of the Leitners ? Probably not.

"Unfortunately, he appears to have passed away in 1984, but he must have been something rather special."

This quote intrigues me though. I hope to see a statement about the man some day, to understand what she means by that.

Back to Gertrude Robinson though, contrary to what Jonathan thought, she did know that something was happening. Actually, she probably (definitely) knows more than Jonathan himself ever has. I guess it makes sense, considering that she was the Head Archivist for 50 years.

Does this mean that she was faking not knowing, or being incompetent, to hide whatever she knew from being discovered ? Are all Archivists destined to become paranoid messes ?

And talking about paranoid messes, Jon is slipping, little by little. Suspicious of everyone, which, again, it's good ! Because Not-Sasha. But also, if he's gonna lose his marbles anyway, he could have been smart earlier and think to hide the tapes himself BEFORE, instead of letting them into his drawer.

Better late than never, I guess. Here's to hoping it wasn't anything.

... I think this post could fit another episode.

BLOOD BAG :

"Not just malaria though, but yellow fever, hepatitis B and signs of cholera."

Can we please stop with the bloody insects, for FIVE FUCKING MINUTE ???

Urgh, whatever. First miss of the season for me, though it was still good, just not something that spoke to me.

Onto the case itself. Again with the diseases and the insects and the blergh. An act by the Hive, maybe ? Or Asag, the demon/oddity of diseases and stuff.

Did the scientist really exchange his syringe for money ? I doubt he did it for another item. Maybe the syringe was protecting him, and when he gave it away, he stopped being protected ?

But then, why did he need to be protected ? Was the oddity after him, for some reason ? Maybe after his family, since it was mentionned that his ancestor had found a way to save people from cholera, which is ... Pretty significant. And I just know that oddities are petty enough to keep a grudge to last several centuries and generations.

Something else to notice is the emphasis on the type of blood it was in the bag. O negative. And infected with several, potentially deadly diseases that could kill any normal man.

... Unless he cheated death and somehow became an immortal with a wish to die.

Jonathan is slowly making his way through the team, which is worrying, but also good because Not-Sasha DOES need suspicion thrown at her, but I swear to God, if he goes easy on her or end up trusting her over any of his friends, I will find a way to reach through the screen and strangle him.

But I fear it might just go that way.

Because I know he is the most open with her. That she is the closest to him of them all, at least at this point in the story.

And Martin, with his hovering, is not helping with the trust issues.

Still, it was nice to have a bit of Timothy's background. I too am asking myself all of these questions.

The quote of the post will not be from TMA, but rather from Niccolò Machiaveli, an author I partcularly like, and who's quotes Jonathan this season has reminded me of, time and time again.

"Never was anything great achieved without danger."

End Liveblogging.