#also it’s important to note that he brings his grill and feeds everyone in his immediate vicinity

[gaybucktruthing]

they still don’t really go to the beach despite living 20 minutes away from the water. dean does, however, go all out for the jimmy buffett tailgate at jones beach every summer

[zettaiunmeis]

HI THANKS TO @raventrigonsdaughter LETTING ME KNOW THAT OG GAME CARMEN AND JULIA USED TO BE PARTNERS BEFORE CARMEN WENT ROGUE, LET ME PROPOSE: VILE!JULIA.

details under the cut because this got Long

jules is part of the either the same class the ~infamous~ black sheep

and they don’t? really like each other? like julia is still kinda Serious and she doesnt really appreciate the vile squad goofing around and tossing water balloons or whatever and black sheep finds julia a little too uptight even if she’s interested in a lot of the same things (history, etc.)

black sheep’s speciality is Being SLick, as we know, but julia’s is patterns (and also historical artifacts)

ok but the important part of this is that bc julia’s is patterns, she ends up being like a scout or smth along those lines bc she can analyse patterns and report back to help plan the caper

and that basically means that when she graduates, she ends up in far more long cons than any of the others

anyway, after black sheep gets in trouble for the water balloon thing, the faculty decide she’s far too mischievous, and so, they assign her a partner — julia

(side note: its kind of the same thing that ends up happening to jean-luc and antonio a bit later on, but thats more because they work well together, and less bc either one of them needed a grounding influence)

anyway black sheep and jules again. do not like each other. but that doesnt mean they dont work well together — julia’s got an eye for patterns, and black sheep has every thieving trick in the book ready and waiting up her sleeves (alongside an instinct for thievery)

slowly, as they are forced to work together more and more, they kind of reach a less tense partnership and then one day black sheep makes a history joke and thats how they become friends

like julia is still very pointedly Not friends with the rest of the vile squad bc they’re still very reckless and immature, etc

but shes sort of seen black sheep when she’s been more grounded and less hyper/feral and she?? kind of doesnt mind??

bc grounded black sheep isnt constantly trying to prove that she’s The Best and grounded black sheep isnt trying to prove that she’s more than just the teacher’s pet — she’s kind of just having fun with julia and julia’s been so serious about her training that she hasnt really made any other friends and…. its nice

its nice to have black sheep loudly slip into the seat next to her and and tease julia about whatever recent historical discovery she’s researching and pull her out of her own head once in a while

and its nice to have black sheep glance over in the middle of class when sheena — sorry tigress — whines about something or the other and roll her eyes in the same way julia feels like doing, even if something strange sticks in her throat when carmen does the same with gray

she can’t pinpoint the exact moment, but at some point, she starts thinking of black sheep as her friend and it’s an exciting enough thought that she’s got a little smile on her face next time black sheep slips into the seat next to her in professor maelstrom’s class

and at some point julia stops being just julia to black sheep, and starts being jules because we’re in a school for thieves, but we’ve already got plenty of ~jules~ right here and thats sincerely the worst joke i’ve ever heard and oh really ~jules~? bet i could find an even worse one

and like all the usual stuff is still happening in the background — shadowsan-black sheep rivalry, gray and the Squad being black sheep’s friends, the phone and player, etc.

its just that now, black sheep has a bit of a calming influence and that does help!

and they work well enough that most people assume that julia and black sheep will be partners after graduation 

even crackle acknowledges it — despite the jealousy he feels at the knowledge

so things continue and all this happens, but then comes finals.

things go the same. black sheep gets perfect scores in all of her exams, except stealth 101

julia — now the historian — can’t help but check for whether black sheep graduated too and just as she does, she hears crackle say it: she didn’t pass

and she wants to go to black sheep and ask if she’s okay because everyone knows how much black sheep’s wanted this, how much she’s been working for it, but by the time gray’s been dragged off by tigress, black sheep has disappeared and julia has no idea where she’s gone

so she waits for a bit in the cafeteria and in the dorms and anywhere else she thinks that black sheep would be and she sees… nothing

and about twelve hours after the results, the faculty pulls her for her first mission (for context, this is before the whole,,, hear the true name of vile thing) which is basically being a plant for the morocco mission, by pretending to be an archaeology phd student from oxford who’s come to study the findings in the excavation

and she’s busy enough with that that she barely gets to think about black sheep or graduation or anything other than the near-overwhelming anxiety that comes with the horrifying ordeal of potentially being Known but she just manages to figure out like,,, guard rotations, as well as the exact objects that are at the site for the vile squad to steal

and then she’s out before they even get there — julia’s pattern recognition and historical knowledge made her pretty useful when it comes to planning capers so it meant that she’s always travelling around the world ahead of each caper, but would also make her a pretty invaluable asset to vile, so they can’t afford to get her caught

julia doesnt hear about black sheep nearly messing up morocco until much later, and even then, she doesn’t have all the info

all she can do is wonder why the hell the faculty would fail someone who somehow managed to sneak out of vile island without anyone realising until much later

and yes, maybe a part of her misses her old partner, but she knows that it wouldn’t matter anyway — she was the mole, and she’d barely get to work directly with carmen so.

but then cut to a year later, when a vile counterfeit operation in boston is suddenly sabotaged

cut to the moment when, julia, despite not having seen her in a year, is still able to somehow recognise black sheep’s work

its Slick. its the Slickness that tips her off, and part of her is reluctant to tell the faculty who it is, but her allegiance demands it and she tells the faculty and she hates herself for it when she sees the murderous rage on each of their faces

and somehow, that — her ability to recognise this carmen sandiego — gets her in a new position, as a mole in interpol, passing on the information they get as they try to track the scarlet super thief as well

and then one day, in poitiers, julia sees her

its black sheep. it’s undeniably black sheep under that red trench coat and julia wants to go and talk to her capture her and bring her in to vile but her new partner ~chase devineaux~ is everything that once made her turn away from her interest in law enforcement and he orders her to call for backup while he tries to stroke his own ego

she does, of course, but maybe she delays it a bit, if only because she’d rather let carmen sandiego get away than have devineaux’s ego get any bigger

and the rest of the season goes much the same except after julia ends up in acme, she reports to vile about everything that’s going on, and they no longer suspect devineaux of helping carmen etc etc

and she can’t help but somewhat sympathise with what carmen’s doing — she’s returning invaluable historical artefacts and julia’s always loved history and- it’s just… altruistic. and that’s admirable. and that’s the only reason i feel so torn about helping vile. that’s it, that’s the only reason.

and then comes the chasing paper caper

what was originally the first real conversation between julia and carmen goes completely differently

(note that most vile operative outside of jules’ graduating class do not know of her existence bc she barely interacts with most of them since she’s more a spy/mole who’s out of the picture by the time anyone else gets on the scene)

carmen still needs to be able to spy on paper star without anyone noticing, so she still goes for the seat right in front of the cute short-haired girl sitting alo- and oh my god jules?

and its the first time julia has heard that nickname in over a year and oh God they were just friends this should Not hit this hard what the Heck

and carmen still sits down and just quietly grills her as to what the hell is going on bc she Knows that jules is a always a mole and never an active part of a caper and she doesn’t?? understand??

and jules is kind of in a daze, but she’s been Trained so she feeds carmen her cover story:

she defected from vile when she saw how they were treating historical artefacts — melting down gold, selling priceless works of art to the highest bidder, etc. etc. — and that since then she’s been silently helping interpol with taking down vile ops, etc.

and it takes a bit but carmen kind of starts to believe it — she knows julia loves history with all her heart, and she’s… well, she’s never been the kind of recruit that carmen’s expected to see in vile anyway, so. it’s not out of the realm of possibility, is it, for julia to be a defector working against vile? after all, isn’t she the same?

so she starts looking around, while waiting for paper star to make a move, and she ends up noticing the briefcase in the seat next to her, and for some reason, those initials — clearly chase devineaux — make her want to scowl

“new partner?” “oh… its… well, work. work... partner” “oh.”

uhhh anyway i might actually. write this? idk don’t count on anything lmaooo.

[holidaywishes]

It Had To Be You XLVIII

Chapter Forty Eight: Ruin My Life/Messages From Her

  Summary: It’s been two days since you and Tyler were together and you try to Face Time him but Karen interferes.

  Warning: hmm.. hopefully some fluff?

  Author’s Note: So, this is another relatively short chapter but the next chapter is pretty long and it’s.. a lot. To say the least. I cried when I wrote most of it so it’s quite a ride and an interesting way to go. I hope you enjoy this small reprieve in these last two chapters from the angst to come and the angst that has been. So the title for this one is a choice, depending on how the mood you have while reading the chapter. I love both songs so much but they’re such different vibes and they both fit with the feel of the chapter. Ruin My Life is a bit more upbeat and cute while Messages From Her has that kind of melancholy, angsty feeling that the series has. So, I leave the song and the chapter title up to you for this one -- sort of like a choose your own adventure! I hope you enjoy it either way!

  Song Credit: Ruin My Life -- Zara Larsson/Messages From Her -- Sabrina Claudio

  masterlist

  the other masterlist

xx

  It was Canada Day, which meant it was one day until you would be walking down the aisle to marry the love of your life. You and Tyler had agreed that he would spend the nights in Brampton with his mom and you would take the lake house; so you wouldn’t have to worry about bringing your dress or forgetting anything important. It also meant that you were able to have a big Canada Day party by the lake with some of your friends and family who had come to Ontario for the wedding. But you wanted Tyler there. You missed having him around so you snuck away to FaceTime him; listening to the chiming as you waited for him to answer

  “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” Karen said from behind just as Tyler picked up

  “Nothing..”

  “Hello?” Tyler said

  “You’re not supposed to see each other before the wedding!” She said as she made her way over to where you were standing

  “There were no rules against us FaceTiming!”

  “Yeah!” Tyler added, chuckling as he did so

  “Goodbye, Tyler.” Karen said and he shrugged before hanging up

  “Wow. He gave up so quickly” you joked

  “Have you finished your vows?” She asked

  “Yes.”

  “You’re lying”

  “I am not!” you countered, “I finished my vows but I haven’t written his note yet.”

  “Note?”

  “Yeah, Tyler said we should write each other letters and read them before we see each other tomorrow.”

  “Oh that’s cute. I’ve seen those pictures on Pinterest.”

  “Right?! I was surprised he wanted to do it but now I can’t seem to write the note...”

  “Have you started?”

  “I tried,” you sighed, “but I keep getting distracted.”

  “Hmm” she hummed and you cocked your head to the side, furrowing your brows at her response

  “What’s that supposed to mean?!”

  “Nothing. Here,” she said, sitting you down at the table and handing you some paper, “start writing. It’ll flow easily, I’m sure. When you’re done, come out and get some food.” You rolled your eyes at her, huffing as she walked away but you tried to jot some thoughts down; flying through memory after memory of your relationship with Tyler, filling the page with the ones that made you smile and left out the ones that brought tears to your eyes. It was a small thing but it truly made you feel closer to him.

  “I love you” he texted, bringing a smile to your face

  “I love you, too,” you replied, “I just finished my letter to you”

  “Ahh, late with that huh? I thought you’d have that done earlier. I know I did.”

  ���You did not!”

  “I did too! As soon as I suggested it, I knew what I wanted to say so I wrote it down so I wouldn’t forget any of it.”

  “Wow. I’m actually shocked”

  “I feel like I should be offended by that...”

  “No! I love that you were able to write it so quickly. I miss you...”

  “I miss you, too. I can’t wait to marry you tomorrow”

  “What are you doing right now?”

  “My mom invited some people over so we’re having a little barbeque with the family and some friends”

  “Okay, I’ll let you get back to it. Tell everyone I say hi. I should probably get back to our little party as well”

  “Will do. See you tomorrow, I love you.”

  “I love you, too.” You went back to the party, grabbing a plate of food and talking to everyone before Lucy put a Canada Day headband on you and forced you to take pictures and you took some shots on your own phone, about a million boomerangs included, and quickly posted them on your Instagram. It wasn’t long before you came across Candace’s story from the party, smiling as you watched Tyler cook steaks on the grill as Jackie and Cassidy danced in the background.

  “Whatcha doin’?” Diana said as she looked over your shoulder

  “Just checkin’ Instagram” you answered and she laughed

  “You’re getting married tomorrow!” she exclaimed

  “I know! It’s crazy right?”

  “It is!” she replied while you continued to scroll through your feed

  “I’m happy though,” you smiled to yourself, “like really happy. I’m a little shocked that he still wants to marry me, especially after that whole ‘postponing the wedding’ thing, but he said he wrote his letter as soon as he thought about it. He said he misses me.”

  “The bar seems real low there, (Y/N)” she shrugged

  “Hey!” you scoffed, “look I know how that sounds but you’d have to see the change that I see. He’s nowhere near who he was when we first met him”

  “I know that,” she admitted, “and I know that he is so excited to marry you. I’m happy you’re happy and so in love.”

  “Yeah,” you smiled to yourself, “I am.” Diana sat back in her chair, smiling at you and how happy you were while your face was still buried in your phone. Something caught your eye in one of Cass’s posts so you went back to check it out but you couldn’t get a proper look at it so you ignored it for now

  “Hey!” Katie said, popping in front of you and taking your phone from you, “you can’t ignore all these people! They’re here for you”

  “I’m sorry,” you laughed, “I just miss him. And I wanna see what he’s up to”

  “He’s at a party. Just like you. Celebrate with us” she pulled you up and gestured for Diana to come to the dock to watch the fireworks. As soon as everyone sat down at the edge of the dock, feet dangling into the water as they sipped their drinks, you got a notification that Tyler was going live, so you opened the link quickly just to see what was happening, walking up to the house to be able to turn the sound on. You watched as Tyler scanned through the backyard surrounded by family and friends, preparing to go out on a boat to get a better vantage point of his fireworks. You listened as Tyler explained how he was getting married tomorrow and how happy he was to have so much support from those closest to him. Your heart was warm as he expressed how much he loved you, mentioning you by name as much as he could. You were about to close the video and head back to your spot on the dock when you heard a voice say something from beside the camera

  “You’re going to be fully off the market...” Kate said and Tyler moved the camera to show her, “how does it feel? Knowing your whole life is going to change?”

  “Honestly?” he questioned and you scrunched your eyebrows in confusion, “it’s the best feeling. Knowing that I’m going to be with the person I love most. It’s amazing.”

  “Well,” she said, smiling directly at Tyler even though it just seemed like it was into the camera, “I guess congratulations are in order!”

  “That’s what the fireworks are for aren’t they?” They both laughed and you finally decided to close the app and lock your phone. It was such a sweet sentiment but the fact that he didn’t tell you that Kate would be there left a weird taste in your mouth. You completely intended to put it out of your mind, because there didn’t seem to be anything going on other than friendly banter, but you found yourself going back to Cassidy’s story to see if Kate had been there all day or if she just showed up for the fireworks; noticing her in the background of one of the stories and you found yourself back at the table where you wrote your letter to Tyler. You scrolled through both Candace and Cassidy’s posts to see what you could see, resting your left elbow on the table and bringing your hand to your head as you continued to look through everything. After a while, you dropped your phone and put it to the side, looking around you to grab another piece of paper and your hand began to write, as if it were possessed, much more quickly than the original letter. When you had finished everything, you placed the pen to the right of the paper and read through the note; unsure of what you intended to do with it but hiding it in the drawer for the time being.

  “Where did you go?” your phone chimed as Diana’s text came through

  “You’re missing the fireworks!” Lucy’s text read

  “You’re not checking in on Tyler again are you?” Katie asked

  “Hey Bride to be! Come to the dock!” Chris sent

  “If you’re breaking the rules, you’re in trouble!” Karen joked

  “Are you okay?” Ethan asked and your head sank low, thinking about a possible answer to reply with, walking back to the dock when you couldn’t think of anything; Lionel running up to you when you came down the hill. He curled up at your feet and you dropped to kneel beside him, smiling at the comfort he gave before you looked at the group watching the fireworks in front of you.

  “There you are!” Lucy called out and you shrugged as you walked over to her, making sure Lionel was with you.

  “Here I am!” you replied, trying to keep a smile on your face so no one would ask where you were. So you wouldn’t have to say what you were thinking. So you wouldn’t have to mention a fear that everyone told you wasn’t real.

[onegayastronaut]

A Forgotten Spark (Hope Mikealson x Reader)

Requested by anon: Dr. Saltzman has saved Hope from Malivore and she is remembered by everyone etc, she comes back to school hoping to meet you, you were her girlfriend, but when she’s back you remember her BUT you have your humanity switch off. When you forgot her, you felt something was missing from your life and turning your switch off helped so you did. Or just hope helping her girlfriend turn her switch back on would include

Words: 2355

You could feel something was different, you just didn’t know exactly what changed. One minute you were checking your phone waiting for a text from someone, but now, you felt as if a weight had been lifted off your chest. You didn’t know what was worrying you in the first place, so you put down your phone and went about your business.

Coming out of your Vampire Studies class, a post-it note fell out of your notebook. All it said was “Love you babe! Can’t wait for our date tonight.” You frowned as you stared at it. The writing seemed familiar, but you couldn’t place who could have possibly written that and put it in your notebook. Maybe dinner could clear things up. As you ate, the feeling of unexplainable sadness came over you again, and every time someone walked past you, you couldn’t help but look up as if you were waiting for someone. The Salvatore School issued all vampires a rationed out volume of synthetically harvested blood for meals, and you sipped on it discontentedly. You’ve never liked the taste of the fake blood, and you didn’t understand why you were drinking it in the first place. Maybe it was time for you to switch over to something warmer and more delicious.

A week into feeling off, you sat in the Mystic Falls Grill waiting for your usual order of burger and fries to come along when two men started fighting across the bar. You decided to ignore the noise until the sound of a bottle breaking followed by a strong whiff of blood caught your attention. Suddenly, it seemed as if the smell of blood was the only thing you could concentrate on. You closed your eyes and tried to concentrate on something else, and before you knew it, the glass containing your soda shattered in your hand.

“Shit.”

“Don’t worry honey. I’ll go get you a new one.”

“I need to go. I’ll settle the bill later.” You ran out of the bar before the waitress could get another word in. Once you got outside, you ran to an abandoned alley in an attempt to breathe it out. Unfortunately, there was a teenager smoking in the corner. “Get out of here, kid.”

“Nah, I think I’m good here.”

“Get out!” You could feel your eyes darken, and you knew you weren’t supposed to attack this kid, or anyone for that matter. But you were hungry, and you can’t even remember why you were supposed to be upset! Maybe the smart thing to do would be to use one of the advantages of being a vampire—the ability to shut down your humanity and eliminate all the things that were making you sad. After closing your eyes, it was only a matter of seconds before you found the emotional switch to flip off.

“Duuuuude...what are you doing?” The teenager caught your attention again as you opened your eyes. This was much better: no more guilt, no more loneliness over God knows what, and best of all, no more rules holding you back. You barely remember feeding off the teenager, all you could think about was how good his blood tasted as you drank it down. All there was left to do was to dump his body somewhere secluded so you won’t get in trouble with Dr. Saltzman when you got back to school.

Days turned into weeks as you went from class to class. There were days when you simply skipped school altogether so you could run off to a neighboring city to feed. It wasn’t like school was that important anyway, vampires couldn’t age and you could pick right back up wherever you left off when you wanted to. You chose a different city every week so that you could throw off suspicion, and you’ve practiced such that your victims could still walk away from their encounters with you. It wasn’t really due to mercy on your part, it was just that you didn’t want to be locked up in one of those underground vampire dungeons at school. You couldn’t understand why the school was feeding vampires those metallic tasting runny blood bags when the real deal tasted so much better. Anyway, what the schools did was none of your business. The only thing that mattered now was finding a good place to get your next meal.

The only wrinkle to your plan today was MG. Usually, you didn’t mind hanging out with him, but today he was like a fly that you couldn’t get rid of. “You know, I’ve been thinking that the two of us could plan the next school event together. It’ll be fun!”

“I’m sure it will be. I’ve got somewhere to be right now, so if you don’t mind…”

“Oh, okay. I’ll see you later then.” MG looked hurt that you blew him off, but again, you couldn’t bring yourself to care. He’ll get over it eventually.

As you made your way over to the next town forty miles away, you were practically salivating over the thought of the meal you were going to have. The local high school seemed to house many delicious looking teenagers, and you couldn’t wait to see if their blood tasted as good as they looked. It took you a shorter time than anticipated to reach your location, and you spotted a tall jock as your meal of choice. Running up to him, you put a hand on his shoulder and looked at him in the eye. “We are going in the woods together. You will not scream or resist until I let you go.”

The boy followed you mutely into a secluded area and you turned to him with your eyes darkened and fangs prepared to bite into his neck. Just as you bit into him, a flood of memories seemed to flash in front of your eyes. A beautiful brunette girl came into your vision, and you saw her going out on dates with you and being romantic. It didn’t take too long for you to remember her name and why you were feeling so sad and empty before. You remember the fact that she was your girlfriend, until she suddenly wasn’t. These memories also reminded you of the fight against Malivore and how Hope had sacrificed herself so that supernatural beings could be safe. You could remember everything now, and again, you could not bring yourself to care. You had spent so much time feeling as if a part of you was missing when she had jumped into Malivore, you were not excited to opening yourself up to any more emotions. Finishing off your meal, you ordered the boy to forget about you and go back to class. You decided it would be best to run back to school before Dr. Saltzman noticed you were gone.

When you got back to school, you decided that keeping a low profile for the moment was most likely the best decision for everyone involved. It wasn’t that you weren’t glad that Hope was back, it’s just that you didn’t have the time or energy to care about anyone else but yourself. As it so happened, your plans for staying off the radar went out the window the moment you tried sneaking into your room. Just when you opened the door, someone rushed at you and enveloped you in a bear hug. You recognized the scent in less than a second, and waited for the hug to be over. It seemed that Hope was waiting for you to come back, but you couldn’t muster up the will to be happy at the fact that she was there in your room.

“(Y/N)! Did you miss me? Of course you did, well you technically couldn’t because everyone was memory-wiped when it came it came to me. But I’m back now, and I’m not going anywhere ever again, I promise! What have you been doing for the last three months? Have you been busy?” Hope stopped talking, and you stared at the ground.

“It’s great that you’re back, But I’m sort of busy right now.”

“Busy with what? Do you want me to come with you?”

You shook your head as you stood by the door. Hope stared at you with narrowed eyes. As she looked at you, she could see that you were still you...but something was wrong. She felt it from the moment she had come into your room and saw that all of your decorations were gone. It didn’t take a genius to figure out what was really going on, but she didn’t want to jump to any conclusions before finding out more. So instead of saying anything more, she made a beeline straight to MG’s room.

“MG, I need to ask you a few questions.”

“Hope! I’m so happy you’re back! How are things? Have you talked to (Y/N) yet?”

“I came to ask you about her, actually. Have you noticed anything strange, like has she been acting differently in the time that I’ve been gone?”

“Oh thank God you noticed that too. I think she may have turned her humanity off when you went into Malivore. Before she did she mentioned something about feeling as if there was a part of her missing, but she couldn’t explain it. I guess her turning her humanity switch off was her way of not feeling like someone important to her was missing.” MG hesitated before finishing off that last sentence. He knew that Hope already felt incredibly guilty for all the pain that had happened to those around her, and he didn’t mean to make Hope feel bad about this situation too.

-----

“Dr. Saltzman, we have to talk.”

“About (Y/N)? Yes we do.” Alaric looked up from his paper. “(Y/N) has been sneaking out of school to feed on local residents for months now, and it’s a miracle she hasn’t been caught yet. She has been smart enough such that she has been wiping memories after she’s done, but this cannot continue.”

“I agree. We have to turn her humanity back on.”

“You mean she didn’t turn it on when you went to see her?”

“She practically kicked me out of her room after she got there. All of her decorations are gone, all that’s in her room is her bed and desk. It’s like there’s nobody there anymore.”

“I’ve had experience with vampires who have turned their humanity off, but they have to want to turn it back on. Is there any place you can think of that’s special for both of you? Anything that has a strong emotional impact on her?”

“I think I know a place.”

“Good. Get her there, because the longer she has her humanity turned off, the harder it will be for her to turn it on.”

———

Now that Dr. Saltzman knew that you were hunting humans in the area, life got slightly harder for you. Not only were you now required to have a partner go with you on hunting trips, you were also “asked” to meet Hope after class later on in the day. Even though it had been framed as a question, you could remember enough training sessions with Hope to realize that it would be unwise to ignore her.

When you arrived at the lake pier to meet Hope, you saw that she was already there waiting for you. “What is it, Hope? What’s going on?”

“Close your eyes.”

“Why?”

“Just do it.”

Closing your eyes, you felt a cloth being put around your eyes. With anyone else, you would have stopped things right there, but you knew you could trust Hope, so you decided to just roll with it. “Are we going somewhere?”

“Maybe. Just relax and let me show you something.” Hope picked you up, and before you knew it, she put you back on the ground again. “You can take the cloth off now.”

When you took off the blindfold, you could tell that Hope had taken you to the place where the two of you always went out on dates. Even though you could remember all the good times you had spent with Hope at this place, you still weren’t interested in turning your humanity switch back on. “Why are we here?”

Hope seemed nervous before she spoke. “I brought you here because I want my girlfriend back. I know I went missing, and --” Hope’s voice broke, and she couldn’t continue. “I should have talked to you before I went into Malivore.”

“I would have stopped you from sacrificing yourself. I could have helped you figure out a way to take out Malivore without you having to do it alone.”

“I know. That’s why I couldn’t tell you what I was going to do. I knew you’d put yourself in danger for me and I couldn’t allow someone else that I love to do that for me.” Hope reached for your hand, and you were surprised that you didn’t want to withdraw from her. Maybe having someone who didn’t want to avoid you wasn’t so bad after all. “I need you to turn your switch back on, (Y/N). I know you don’t want to, but please. I miss you, MG misses you. Even Lizzie told me that not having you to plan events with is boring now.”

As Hope stepped closer to you, the wind blew in your direction causing you to be able to smell her shampoo. You didn’t know just how much you missed waking up in the morning and burying your face in her hair, and it seemed like the natural next step to turn your humanity switch back on. The moment you did, a flood of emotions went through your mind, and you couldn’t help a few tears from coming out.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. I’m right here.”

“I just missed you so much.” Your crying caused your words to be nearly unintelligible, but you didn’t care because all that mattered was that Hope was back with you.

“I know babe. I’m never leaving you again, I promise.”

[renaer-is-allegedly-hot]

session 14 notes

TO CLARIFY IN THIS SESSION AERANA DID N O T TOUCH ADAM’S BUTT SHE SLAPPED HIM AT THE NOTION AND IT’S A GOOD THING HE TOOK 11 DAMAGE AERANA HAS NO REGRETS also am i sorry for this format ? eh not really anymore

• Sylvia's siblings r screaming 

• Dom broke his brother's headphones

•  oh god we're starting but I'm still trying to fROST MY CAKE

• Yava I think her name is is like ok gonna join y'all

• Adam's racist

• GUESS EVERYONE HATES DROWS LMFAO

• Yava hates drows?

• Yava's gonna help protect the house

• I currently cannot breathe because there is a dirty diaper being changed around me and it is

• Aerana theo and asyna r downstairs

• Adam busts down the door and tells asyna to cook

○ Pushing yava into our house

○ "hi everyone this is yava this is my bard teacher she's gonna b basically our security for tonight"

○ Yava tugs on adam's shoulder and gestures to the pile of bodies

§ "yava remember when I said I got attacked last night . This was our self defense pile"

§ Yava apologizes to us for the nature of our circumstances

§ "if any of my friends - or you - " ok a/n: adam has put a suspicious amount of trust in yava given the amount of time and I'm shook

• Outside entrance doors

• Door opened by someone not a member of adam's party or by yava after dark, then spell set off

• All of our windows have been blown up but were boarded up

• Adam puts glyphs on doors and windows they used to get in last time and on basement hatchet and one on kitchen entrance

○ Making them all cold

○ Den on the second floor?

○ I wanna eat my cake

○ Glyphs will unspell around 8 a.m. the next day

○ I !! Wanna eat my cake :)

○ "when u wake up tmrw morning can u deactivate all the spells"

§ She would not b able to reactivate it if we did that

○ It won't dispel until the three days r over

• Jacob forgot celandine's name

• There r street vendors

• There's no ice box like no place to keep drinks cool in the house and apparently that's weird

• We need to feed yava

• "if asyna ,,, turned into a pig" marguerite, 2020

• Dom brings up lotr count: 1

○ Specifically namedrops "the fellowship of the ring" count: 2

• We're going grocery shopping

• Adam and asyna and theo r gonna go grocery shopping ? 18 for investigation

○ Not rlly grocery stores but ppl selling food everywhere

○ I want . Grilled chicken

○ Or like fried chicken

○ chicken

§ Maybe I'll microwave the pasta I made for dinner w some extra cheese on top

• Adam gets pork loins, potatoes, green beans, butter, bread, garlic, salt and pepper (which we have), strawberry sponge cake, heavy cream, chardonnay

○ Cel is making way back to house

○ Perception check, aerana 6

○ Aerana is looking around, sees yava making rounds; yava doesn't seem to treat aerana any differently

○ Eventually aerana sees cel arrive

○ Cel gets back

§ The bodies r not there anymore

□ IT SMELLS LIKE MISTLETOE

□ There is no mistletoe

• "heh. That could be scary" dom, 2020

• I'M H U N G R Y

• "tuesdays are pork loin nights" adam 2020

• Theo works on potatoes

• Cel pops in

• "adam did you make the garlic bread like I asked you to" theo, 2020

• Adam makes cooking intelligence check, 15

• Dinner is done

• Yava is done with one of the spells

• Something's happening I tuned out for two seconds

• Yava no longer considers self as one who goes on adventures but is now asking for our motivation for seeking this treasure

• Yava asks us for our motivations

○ Adam: revenge on bingbong

○ I don't remember the rest but it's not for the money

• Yava says she admirers the nobler goal of keeping the gold out of the hands of the xanathar guild

○ We don't know what we'll do w gold; cel is on team chuck-it-into-the-ocean

○ Could throw it into typ pit

• Oh my god. My cake slaps.

○ I want to focus on what yava is saying rn basically she's proposing we return the money if/when we get it but MY C A K E S L A P S

○ I N C R E D I B L E

○ Yava thinks there's a need for the money

• We don't know if yava is gonna report us

• Adam is gonna feed ot

○ Adam scoots the food back

○ Adam walks upstairs and says he's gonna b gone for five minutes and doesn't come back

• Cel asks yava abt her adventuring days

○ Was part of a nobles court years ago

○ Pirates too ig

○ I want cheese I want pasta with cheese

○ Has been to island of chault

○ Am I microwaving my pasta uh yes

○ Bet my fbi agent is judging me for how I'm reaching for my pasta from the microwave to avoid unplugging my earbuds

• Theo asks for advice from yava

○ Advises us to be safe but also to seek adventure where we can

○ Can get in over our head tho

○ MAN THIS PASTA IS G O O D I PUT MOZZARELLA ON TOP BRUHHHH

○ Yava is spending the rest of her time still guarding our house

• Never have I ever

○ Adam

○ Aerana

○ Theo

○ Cel 

○ Asyna

§ Been in a relationship

§ Been outside of waterdeep

§ Had drugs

§ A good relationship w parents

§ Not had Pets

§ Worn pajamas

§ Thrown up on someone

§ Education

§ Talked to a god or deity

§ Eaten meat

□ Asyna is a vegetarian but made the best pork loin

§ Met my mom

§ Swallowed a key

○ Asyna wins

§ Adam has to kiss ot

□ "this is super important the xanathar r upstairs" tells him to whisper kisses him on the forehead then runs upstairs

§ Cel and theo have to be one big person, go find yava and have a short chat as one person

□ Takes aerana's cloak

□ "do you want to be the top or bottom"

□ Theo is legs cel is heads and arms

○ Aerana has to hug everyone

§ Slaps adam when he accuses her of touching his butt; 11 damage

§ It's canon aerana can't hug

○ Cel sits on theo's shoulders (doing this bc yava is back)

§ Adam gives them a mustache w the purple wig

§ Gave up on walking in coordination

§ Yava is in kitchen standing near entrance, eyes closed kneeling, focusing on spell

§ Plans change cel and theo r gonna go to fallah's shop

§ They're gonna do it the next day w yava actually

• It's abt 11

○ Before yava leaves n during theo's shift, hear a knock at front door

○ Theo looks through peephole

§ Dwarf at the door wearing a guild uniform

§ Two other ppl w her

§ Gnome w them, one appears to b taller

□ Female dwarf, male gnome, somebody taller

□ Yava looks through the peephole and says they don't look to b armed

□ Theo opens the door a crack; the ppl had been repeatedly knocking

□ "female dwarf woman"

□ Half moon spectacles n long ponytail + taller human woman w cropped hair

□ They're all wearing a uniform

□ Utilitarian brown clothes

§ "hello there my name is kalima n these r mertram and harriet; members of one of the city guilds the plumbers guild"

□ Informed by city watch of magical explosion

□ Theo says to reschedule their inspection

□ Theo roasts n says they should've come earlier

® 5 persuasion check

□ They'll come back in two days

□ Lmao lavinia we learning

□ They step down the stairs and confer on the doorstep as leaving

® Look around house and discussing + carrying out informal measurements

® Can't hear anything then they walk away

□ Tells whoever has next watch what happened

□ Yava leaves during adam's watch

® Before she leaves adam thanks her for her work + says he's glad she's become a relevant character in this campaign

® "don't thank me yet adam"

• That's it

• Lord of the rings mention counter: 2

[pixiealtaira]

Dragged Kicking and Screaming  ( 14/ 22)

Title: Dragged Kicking and Screaming  

Or How Burt Hummel Mashed the Hummels and Hudsons Into One Functioning Family.

Characters(s): Kurt, Burt, Carole, Finn, with short appearances by the New Directions guys and various ops who mostly take up space. Rating: PG13 Summary: Somehow the Hummel household and the Hudson household had to come together…

Chapter Nine Chapter Ten

Chapter eleven Chapter twelve  Chapter thirteen

(Authors note: I would feel bad about this being late, but I got to meet and hold my new nephew yesterday, so I don’t)

14.

“We have Holiday Traditions and the issues surrounding driving left to discuss…at least for now. We will come back to the job thing after the driving thing, but possibly not today.  Are we ready?” Burt asked.

“Let’s do Holiday stuff.” Finn said.

“Kurt, pull out paper for notes.” Burt said. “One sheet for each major holiday.”

“What are major holidays?” Finn asked.

“Well, that is a good start, Finn.  What are the main holidays you celebrate?” Burt asked.

“Thanksgiving, Christmas, 4th of July….” Finn said.  “Oh, my birthday!”

“Nothing else?” Kurt asked, with a bit of disbelief.

“What else is there?”

“Easter?  Memorial Day? Veterans’ day? Labor Day? New Year’s?”

“Oh, I guess we do Easter and New Year’s…oh and Valentine’s day.”

“Mother’s day? Father’s day?”

Finn shrugged.

“Kurt, add Saint Patrick’s day and Halloween.”

“Oh, yeah, I celebrate Halloween.” Finn said.

“Now,” Burt said. “I want you to start listing things you do for each of the holidays Kurt calls out.  IF you do not mention it, we won’t know it is important and therefore will not be able to include it in our traditions.  Do we all understand?”

“I think this is silly.” Carole said. The empty water glass was sitting at her elbow and she was glaring at Kurt while rubbing her forehead.  “I think we should just do things the way the majority of the people want it done, which means we do it how Finn and I want it done. Burt, you will obviously do it our way.”

“No.” Kurt said.  “You aren’t the majority and you can’t make dad do things your way…especially when he doesn’t even know what your way is.”

“Remember, your dad said he’d start that sass jar, Kurt.” Carole replied.

“And Kurt’s comment wouldn’t qualify for it but yours might.” Burt said.

“Excuse me?” Carole asked. She turned the glare to Burt.

“I said I want everyone to list off the things they do for each holiday as Kurt calls them out.  I wasn’t joking Carole.   WE said we were going to be mixing traditions, equally.  We haven’t. I haven’t been enjoying missing out on Hummel traditions.  I want a mix. So list what you do and we will find a balance and mix of what is important to you and Finn and what is important to me and Kurt.  So let’s start at the beginning of the year and move forward.  New Year’s.”

“Ok,” Kurt said, writing New Year’s on top of a blank sheet in his notebook. “The first holiday is New Year’s Day, and probably New year’s Eve since it feeds into New Year’s day.”

“We sleep.” Carole said. “We are generally at a party the night before. Not the same.  We haven’t been to the same party in years.  Last year I was at Janet’s party…you know, the one from work who likes to go clubbing in Columbus.  It was a nice party; she brought in a live DJ. I think Finn was at that Nelson kid’s house.”

Finn shook his head. “Nah, we started off there but then his parents came home and so we went to some friend of Azimio’s who lives by the university somewhere…I can’t remember where…I ended up at Strando’s house…I think it was his house. It is still fuzzy.”

Burt coughed. “I see we need to add under-age drinking to the list to be spoken about still.”

“You can’t really mean that.” Carole said.

“I do.” Burt said.

“But Kurt drank last year and puked on Miss Pillsbury.” Finn said.

“And they both ended up in the ER and Kurt ended up grounded and worked for free for two weeks. Or rather he donated his check to the food bank and woman’s shelter.  He also had to do community service hours. I think we settled on 14, and he had to speak with a counselor about the dangers of under-age drinking. And he had to accompany me on two DUI tows and a crash involving a drunk driver.”

Kurt nodded.

“God, you are so lame.” Finn said.

“I am lame?” Burt asked.

“No, Kurt.  No wonder he is so weird and…” Finn trained off.

Burt looked at him but Finn refused to meet his face.

“Next time I get a call to come tow a totaled car due to someone driving drunk…I am bringing you with me.  If we’re in luck, you won’t have to scrape brain matter off a broken windshield, window or steering wheel to get it onto the truck.” Burt said.

Kurt shivered.

“Well what do you do?” Carole asked.

“We host a New Year’s Eve party at the house for everyone who works at the shop and their families.  I invite everyone who worked for me during the year before, including those who had apprenticeships here or who trained here. Kurt runs games and movies in the basement for kids and we play cards and watch games or movies up here.  Everyone stays over for breakfast the next morning, so even those who drink won’t be out on the roads.” Burt said. “Remember, I invited you last year.”

“Oh, yeah.  I forgot about that.  Janet’s sounded better because I know those girls and how fun they get.” Carole said.

“So…” Kurt said.

“We will host the Garage Party here.” Burt said. “Is anyone opposed to breakfast?”

“Do I have to cook it?” Carole said.

“No, Kurt generally cooks it.” Burt said.

“I make up breakfast burritos and sticky buns the day before during the day when I’m making the food for the party and then start putting stuff in the oven and making fry ups or breakfast bowls when people start waking up.” Kurt states.

“I guess that can still happen.  I don’t promise to go though, not if something else sounds better.” Carole said.  “It sounds boring.”

“I personally don’t see how it could be more boring than drinking at Janet’s.” Burt said.

“That’s not all we do…like last year there were like dancers and strippers and stuff.” Carole said.

Burt just looked at her with his eye brows raised.

“Carole, we are both well past our 20s.  We have teen sons…not even young teens.”

“So what?  You want me to stay home and twiddle my thumbs?  Read boring books? Knit maybe?” Carole snapped.

“You could stay here and play cards with us, or we could play bingo like you seem to be fond of and we could dance here.”

Carole huffed.

“Ok…” Kurt said loudly.  “I have written for our New Year’s ‘things to do’ so far…the Hummel’s Tires and Lube New Year’s Party complete with breakfast. Naps during the day. Does anyone object to the task oriented part of the Hummel New Year’s Day traditions?”

“What are those?” Finn asked.

“We switch all the batteries in the fire and carbon monoxide detectors and review the safety plans. We can do it in the late afternoon so it doesn’t interfere with naps.” Kurt said.

“You what?” Finn asked.

“The smoke alarm that beeped when you burned your grilled cheese a few weeks ago? The disk thing on the ceiling right outside the kitchen?  It needs batteries and I change them on New Year’s Day.  Also on Flag day.  The ones upstairs and in the basement too.”

“Oh.  It does? I thought it was plugged in.” Finn said.

“It needs to work even when the power is out, Finn.  It doesn’t plug in.” Kurt said.

“Huh.  What’s that other part?”

“The safety plan?” Kurt asked.

“Yeah.”

“You know…how you would evacuate the house in case of fire or in case we had to because the police needed us to.  Where we would meet up in case we had to evacuate.  Making sure all our contact numbers are correct and intact and still willing to be contacts.” Kurt said.

Carole and Finn looked at him blankly.

“Oh, wait.  Like we had to do that one time when I was in cub scouts!” Finn shouted suddenly with a look of comprehension in his eyes.

“Probably.” Kurt said.

“Yes, Kurt, we will do that.  We will also serve cabbage of some sort for dinner.  I will not risk my great-grandmother coming to haunt me if we ditch that.” Burt said.  “Finn’s plans will be discussed later.”

“Not fair.” Finn said.

“We’ll discuss them with the underage drinking.” Burt said.  “That will be stopping while you live here.”

“But…”

“I’m not kidding, Finn.  You are coming with me the next tow call for a drunken driving tow.  You will see why you won’t be drinking like that.” Burt looked at Kurt. “Next Holiday.  Do you guys do anything for Martin Luther King, Jr.’s day?”

“Complain about not getting out of school?” Finn asked.

“Nothing.  If I work I go to work if not I stay home and do home stuff.” Carole said.

“I listen to his speeches and work at the shop so the two African Americans who work at the shop can have the day off for sure.” Kurt said.  “Nothing really family traditional.”

Burt nodded.  “Then Valentine’s Day is next.”

“I make waffles for breakfast and give my dad a homemade card.” Kurt said.

“I keep his homemade cards and give him a box of chocolates.  I gave one to Finn this last year too.” Burt said.

“You make your dad a card?” Finn asked.

“Yes, don’t you give your mom anything?” Kurt asked.

“No.  She gives me stuff.”

Kurt shook his head.

“You make breakfast again?” Carole asked.

“Yes.  I make breakfast a lot. Dad and I often celebrate mostly during breakfasts for non-major holidays. That way Dad can take someone out on a date for dinner.” Kurt said. “You know…like he did this last Valentine’s Day…”

“If I don’t go out we make dinner together and watch an action film. I get to choose which one.” Burt said.    

“So any objections?” Kurt said.

“What are you writing down?” Carole demanded.

Kurt sighed. “Date night, waffle breakfast, gifts from parents.  Cards to parents.”

“I don’t think you should go around expecting stuff.” Carole said.

Kurt rolled his eyes. ”Ok…how about we change that, then. Chocolates from Dad to Kurt and maybe Finn.  Card to Burt from Kurt and maybe Finn.”

“Don’t forget my stuff from mom.” Finn said.

“Finn gets stuff from Carole.” Kurt said as he wrote it down.

“What about a card to me?” Carole asked.

“If I can get Finn to do cards.” Kurt said.

“What about from you?” Carole snapped.

Kurt sighed and closed his eyes.

“Are you getting him something?” Burt asked.

“Huh?” Carole said.

“You want Kurt to make or get you a card, but you told him not to expect stuff, making it pretty clear he wasn’t to expect things from you.  Why should he write down making sure you get a card from him?”

“Because he wrote down making sure you get a card.” Carole replied.

“And he’d been making me Valentine’s Cards since he was one years old.  It is tradition.”

“But if he makes one for you he should have to get me one, too.  He should have to get everyone who lives here one.” Carole said.

“And yet you shouldn’t have to get him anything?” Burt asked.

“He’s not my son.  He’s yours.”

Burt clenched his jaw and fisted his hands. “Carole…I thought we went over this. We are trying to be a family here.  Not YOU and YOURS and ME and MINE.  US all together.  STOP!”

“Dad…your heart.” Kurt said softly. “Let’s just move on…I doubt they do anything for President’s Day and ours isn’t really something we have to do so let’s move to St. Patrick’s Day and then Easter.”

“Kurt…” Burt started.

“Dad. Let’s get this done. Ok?” Kurt said.

“Ok. St. Patrick’s Day?”

“We go to Cleveland for the Parade and stay at Finn’s dad’s parent’s house. Finn and his cousins do stuff at the house afterwards and the adults go out drinking at some of the pubs.” Carole said. “They have asked we still do that so Finn can see his cousins and grandparents.  Burt can come.  Kurt probably shouldn’t miss school. I’m sure we can find some way for him to stay someplace while we go, like at Rachel’s or something.  He shouldn’t stay at the house alone now that Finn and I live here. It wouldn’t be good for him to do that anymore, not with all our stuff here now.  If it is close enough to the weekend we can make a weekend get-away out of it.  Burt, you could take me shopping and out to eat and we could watch some sort of game or movie or show or something.  Finn could come with us if it was a game.”

Kurt was writing frantically in his notebook and Burt had to take a few minutes to decide whether or not to comment on the whole leaving Kurt alone at the house bit.  He decided not to, but noted it down as something to come back to later if needed.

“Or it could be a family vacation. We could watch the parade and then while Finn hangs with his grandparents and cousins and you go out to pubs with your old in-laws, Kurt and I could go do something. The next day we could go do something as a family…like a game or museum.  Then while the boys were at the hotel, or Kurt was at the hotel if Finn stayed with relatives, you and I could go out to eat.” Burt said.

“I don’t think Finn’s dad’s family wants Kurt there.” Carole said.

“Kurt wouldn’t have to be near them at any point, except maybe while we watched the parade. It would be a wonderful chance for Kurt and I to do things in Cleveland together and yet us all also be able to do things in Cleveland together.” Burt said.

Carole huffed.

“Maybe you and Kurt should just stay home.” Carole replied.

“If you stay home, you can go to Jake’s St Paddy’s Extravaganza, Dad.” Kurt said.  “And I’ll make green pancakes for breakfast and something with corned beef and potatoes for dinner for me.”

Kurt wrote down Carole and Finn spend St Patrick’s Day with Finn’s dad’s family and Kurt and Burt eat green pancakes and Burt will go to Jake’s like usual under March 17th.  The next page was started with Easter written across the top.

[ya-boi-hawkeye]

Taken Out

Stela stopped for a moment, leaning against a tree to wipe the sweat from her brow. Even starting early on Depredador, getting up and scouting before the sun had fully risen, was no guarantee one would be able to beat the heat. Both seasons, wet or dry, it was oppressively hot, the sort of heat that coiled itself around you like a serpent, scorching your lungs if dry and drowning you if wet. And right now it was well into the wet season, the air as thick and wet as the rivers. It didn’t matter how much you sweat in the wet season, there would be no dry, cooling breeze to offer support.

“Talk to me Girl.” Stela’s comlink crackled to life, Kane’s voice filtering through. Stela was silent for a moment, not answering her friend quite yet. Instead she pulled the canteen off her hip and took a sip. Only then did she talk.

“Nothing up North,” she said. “Motion trackers are all good, no new forces. Looks like we’re clear. How’s the East looking?”

“Nothing new happening with The Order,” her second replied. “But it looks like some of the trees are fruiting early. We should round up some men to start collecting, before any of the animals get to them first.”

“Check the South first,” Stela said. “I’m gonna start heading West. I swore I saw a First Order ship touch down in that direction, Upsilon-class from the looks of it. So you know it’s someone important.”

“Someone important?” Kane’s voice asked. “Here? On this little ball of mud in the middle of nowhere? I think you were dreaming, Girl.”

“I know what I saw, Kane,” Stela said. “Something big is coming, and I don’t want to be caught off guard.” A dream, he said. More like a nightmare. There were so many people who could be on a shuttle of that kind, and none of them were good. It was enough to make her feel sick from the moment it touched down, her instincts and The Force both telling her that something very wrong was about to happen.

“Just be careful,” Kane said. “I may be too far to come rescue you.”

“I will, Kane,” she said. “If I find anything I’ll let you know.”

——–

After an hour or so of patrolling the West Stela found nothing worth noting. A flowering tree there, a new rodent burrow there, but no sign of any First Order officers, or even any troops. After a while she stopped, reaching for her com and contacting her second.

“I’m not seeing anything, Kane,” she said. “Maybe you were right. Must have been a fals- oh shit it’s Kylo Ren!” She ducked down behind a log, her Force Signature winking out of existence, as her hand moved up to shut her com off completely, not wanting to risk Kane trying to contact her, and giving her location away.

Walking through the forest, on a game-trail just below where she was currently crouching, was Kylo Ren. The blood pounded in her ear, her heart jack hammering in her chest, and she had to hold her breath to keep from gasping. This was much, much worse than she could have imagined; of everyone who could have been on that shuttle why did it have to be him?

She knew what the protocol was, she had set it in place herself. If Kylo Ren was spotted, by anyone, the rule was that person return to base, report where he was, and return with the recommended amount of back up. The recommended amount being the entire rest of the kriffing militia, because Stela didn’t want to take a chance with an opponent who could freeze a blaster bolt in midair. Surely if everyone shot at him at once at least one would break through.

Stela knew what she should be doing, but now that she was so close to him she couldn’t bring herself to follow her own orders. Returning to base could make the trail go cold, could cause them to lose this chance. Stela could do it, she could take Ren out of this fight once and for all. Wouldn’t need to fear that he or his knights would come for her or her son. She could kill him, and send a real message to the First Order, to Snoke. Could prove just how willing she was to fight and kill for her home.

Slowly she stood from her crouch, her hand drawing out her machete. Watching him move through the jungle, she could tell the advantage was hers. His footfalls were heavy, and everything within a mile could probably hear him. He had no clue how to move silently, how to glide over the forest floor, barely disturbing a leaf.

Stela, however, did know how to do just that. She wouldn’t have been able to feed herself if she hadn’t. She slid down the hill with grace, careful to keep herself silent, and crept up behind the man, struggling to keep from trembling. One wrong move, one misstep, and it would be all over for her.

When he paused and shifted, moving to turn around, Stela struck, driving the flat edge of her machete into the back of his head as hard as she could, shattering the weapon. He swayed and collapsed into the dirt, half on his stomach and half on his side.

Stela stood for a moment, breathing hard, her grip white knuckled on the handle of the machete. Finally, she got over her shock and dropped the handle, drawing her blaster quickly and pointing at her foe, in case it was a trick. She inched closer to him and toed him over onto his back before jumping back, blaster ready. When he didn’t move, she leaned in closer to check for life, even though the Force assured her she hadn’t killed him. Yet even without the Force, the slow rise and fall of his chest gave it away. He was alive. Unconscious, but alive.

Stela swallowed and with trembling hands lifted up her blaster, leveling it with her helpless opponent’s heart.

She knew she should do it. Just put a blaster bolt in him and be done with it, before he could wake up and hurt someone. Take out a third of the First Order’s leadership base, put a dent in their ability to keep functioning. All she had to do was pull the trigger.

But something stopped her. She didn’t know what it was, but an uneasy feeling made her reconsider killing him. It wasn’t because he was unconscious, wasn’t because he couldn’t fight back. She had done far worse than that, plenty of times. No this feeling was something else, something stronger that urged her to show mercy, just this once.

With a sigh, she holstered her blaster. Maybe it was right. Alive he was dangerous, but he could also be grilled for intel, could give them an edge they needed to win this war. If she could get him back to base, get him contained. If she could break him.

She looked over at her captive and frowned.

“I cannot carry you,” she said. He was probably just under a quarter of a meter taller than her, and much heavier judging from the bulk under his robes. Stela wasn’t weak, but she couldn’t exactly carry two hundred pounds of Sith through the jungle herself. She’d need some help.

Stela flipped her com back on, intending to ask Kane to come to her location and give her a hand, but instead when her friend’s voice came through, yelling.

“Stela answer your damn com! If you’re dead, I am going to ki-”

“Kane I’m fine!” She shouted back, cutting him off. “Kriff, okay maybe not. I think I’ve gone deaf in that ear, thanks.”

“Stela?” He sounded out of breath, and it occurred to Stela that her last transmission must have sent him into a panic. “Stela what the hell was that?! Why did you turn of your kriffin’ comlink, Girl?!”

“I didn’t want you talking to give me away!” Stela said.

“Well next time say that!” Kane shot back. “The last thing I wanna hear from you is ‘oh shit, it’s Kylo Ren.’ I thought you might have died!”

“Well I didn’t,” she said. “Far from it.” She smiled, even though Kane couldn’t see her. “I got him, Kane. He’s right here with me, out cold.” Kane went quiet, the only sound coming through the com being his panting breaths.

“I’m already on my way to you,” he said. “Hold tight and I can give you a hand. Be careful. If he starts to wake up just shoot him.”

“I broke my machete on the back of his head,” she said. “I don’t think he’s waking up.”

“Just be careful.” The link went quiet and Stela was left with her prisoner. She sat down on an exposed root, wiped some of the sweat from her brow, and took out her canteen to take a sip. Only to pause, her eyes drifting over to Kylo Ren.

“Idiot,” she muttered, screwing the cap back onto her canteen and going over to him. Grabbing hold of his wrists she dragged him into the shade, but even in the shade the heat was oppressive, and dressed in black like he was, in those layers like he was, he was in danger of overheating to the point of death. She had seen it happen before, in the old or the young, the sick or the injured, but make it hot enough and even someone in the prime of their life wasn’t immune.

First the belt, then the hood. Then the tunic, and whatever the hell was under the tunic. Kriff, did he honestly need this many layers?

“Really?” Stela asked, quirking an eyebrow when she reached the suspenders and the mesh crop top. “How is this in any way a practical outfit?” Kylo Ren, unconscious as he was, didn’t answer, and she shrugged, figuring that this was good enough. At least the mesh would let some air reach his skin, would help ease some of the heat.

Except…her eyes strayed to his helmet, and she couldn’t help but wonder if he would have trouble breathing in it in the heat. If the black material wouldn’t overheat and cook his brain. Reaching over, carefully, like she expected him to regain consciousness, she found the button to open the helmet and pressed it.

And he was. Human.

Painfully so, Stela thought with no small amount of disappointment.

Kylo Ren looked… young, she supposed. Younger than her at least, and definitely younger than she would expect for someone of his crimes. Soft, even, with the relaxed state of his unconscious features, framed by wavy black hair.

Stela didn’t know what to expect from this creature. Someone as wizened, as obviously evil as Palpatine perhaps? The mask and cowl hiding some horrific injuries, like Vader? Or maybe she thought he would be alien—humanoid but still other—or a cyborg. Some combination of the two.

But no, he was just some human, no more or no less unique than anyone else save perhaps, not many people sparked a new civil war and participated in the furthering of a fascist dictatorship.

Not many people wore thick, heavy black layers in the middle of a jungle planet either.

“You really are an idiot.” Stela decided, pressing her fingers into the area where she’d hit him in the head.

It wasn’t bleeding, thankfully. Head wounds bled a lot, she knew, even if the wound itself wasn’t so bad, and a lot of blood would be sure to attract the local predators. Stela didn’t know for certain if Force Sensitivity was something that vornskr could smell on a person’s blood, but she didn’t want to attract any of the packs that were known to roam the area.

While she waited for Kane to get to her, and it wouldn’t be much longer, Stela prepared her catch for transport. She didn’t think that he was going to wake up any time soon, but to be safe she switched her blaster to stun… just in case. If she wasn’t going to kill him—and again why didn’t she just kill him—she would at least make sure they could get some information out of him.

It was standard practice to keep the rope bound to her belt, especially when making forest trips; one didn’t know when they’d need to climb something, or carry something. And, though it was much rarer, one didn’t know when they would need to restrain a known hostile. Stela worked quickly as she waited, ears perked and body tense to react at even the slightest of noises as she bound him like game.

He was alone, and she wasn’t sure if it was stupidity or bravado that was the reason. A bit of both, she suspected; what could back up handle that the Force couldn’t?

Me. The thought came with a savage, heady sense of satisfaction as she leaned back on her heels, staring down at the man. You probably came looking for me and now here you are. Helpless.

A benefit to them either way.

She had been right, she mused, as she waited for Kane. There had been someone important coming down to visit Depredador and now Stela couldn’t help but wonder what came next. Logically she knew what came next regarding Ren; they’d put him in one of the storage sheds, farther out from the main bulk of the base, and dose him with Force Suppressants while they tried to get as much information as possible about the First Order.

But this wasn’t just some random officer—this was Kylo Ren. After he failed to report in, would they send out search parties? Would they send out the rest of their Knights to find him, or even, the Void Squadron? They would have to be careful going forward. That meant extra guard rotations, watching out for any abnormalities in the forest. This was a very high profile prisoner, and while Ren’s own reclusive nature and mysterious actions among the Order might buy them some time, eventually somebody would have to realize that he was missing.

Would they care though? That was the real question.

Stela knew—intelligence was free flowing, and there was a number of conversations to be eavesdropped on in the market—what the reputation of her planet was.

This was the place that General Hux sent people to die. Stela couldn’t help but wonder if that was what had happened to Ren. If the Supreme Leader, in his disappointment following the aftermath of the lost Starkiller base, had sent him here in the hopes that Stela would deal with yet another defective soldier.

It was foolishness to do so, if such were the case, and she didn’t take Snoke as an idiot.

No doubt the other officers would think so, and likely wouldn’t even bat an eye at his extended absence.

More the benefit for her then.

“Kriffing—fuck head—stars damn it.” She heard Kane slashing his way through the thick undergrowth, and her brow furrowed in annoyance at the noise he made.

“I guess we’re just abandoning all pretenses of stealth then?” She said crossly, looking over when he came to stand beside her, hands fisting on his hips.

Kane clicked his tongue at that, nothing but cheek even in the presence of his superior officer. “What are they gonna do, send Kylo Ren at us?”

Stela didn’t point out that they could easily be ambushed, that a handful of Stormtroopers could easily kill them and take Ren back, because she knew that Kane was—as is his nature—being contrary for the sake of it. To mask the worry, the annoyance, at thinking she’d died.

She appreciated it, even if she did want to put her boot to his ass occasionally.

“So, this is him huh?” Kane mused thoughtfully, crouching to inspect Ren. “Thought he’d be… I don’t know. More? Bigger?”

“Uglier.” She offered, prompting an affirmative noise.

It wasn’t that Stela thought the man was attractive, but he wasn’t what she expected when she thought of the creature behind the mask.

Kane grunted as he hoisted Ren over his shoulder, the effort obvious. “They feed him well at least.”

“Lucky him.” She snorted, no small amount of bitterness in it.

To have access to food, whenever, however he wanted it. If something didn’t appeal to his tastes, to be able to discard it and select another dish. It was decadent, excessive by her experience, where food was rationed so heavily that they were all just barely meeting the nutritional requirements. And it filled her with anger, that old, ever constant injustice of being forced to live on nothing but the barest of scraps while others got to flourish.

That was what she was fighting for, that among so many other injustices that had been forced upon her planet since before she’d been born.

“Hey, Stela?” Kane asked lightly, following behind as she forged the path back to base. “Quick question.”

“And what’s that, Kane?” The response came out almost amused, the slightest of smiles curling at her lip in a way that her friend seemed an expert at provoking.

“What the kriff is this idiot wearing?” That earned a bark of laughter from her, and she didn’t have to look over to see the annoyed, disbelieving look on his face. “Who the hell is stupid enough to wear all black on a jungle planet?”

A question she’d asked herself, and said as much, which prompted a string of complaints from Kane as they continued back to base. There was something… strangely lighthearted about it, which almost seemed out of place. As though they’d come back from a successful hunt, instead of taking one of the most dangerous men in the galaxy prisoner.

That was something she should show some pride in. It proved that Ren was mortal, that the First Order could be struck, could bleed. It would be damaging to morale, when, after they got as much information as they could, she put his head on a pike for all the world to see.

But first.

First they needed information. And to get information they needed to properly contain the threat.

“Security is already preparing the holding area.” Kane offered, and as they approached base, she could see the armed guards waiting, an escort with their blasters trained on Ren. “The suppressants are on hand as well.”

“Good.” She nodded, all business and professionalism as she squared her shoulders, stiffening her spine. “Drop him off and then meet me at Central. This calls for a meeting.”

“Stela what the kriff sort of stupid fuck shit idea was this?” Miles demanded, arms crossed over his chest and expression so thunderously furious.

Kane, always at her shoulder, levelled a warning look at him. “That’s your Commander, show some respect.”

“Thank you Kane.” She murmured, looking down at the medic’s report on their prisoner.

“Stela what the kriff sort of stupid fuck shit idea was this?” He asked with his next breath, swiping the report away from her.

Any gratitude she felt instantly died, and once again her mind helpfully supplied your boot, his ass.

“We have enough suppressants to last, and more than that we have the means to make more.” She pointed out calmly. “And protocols are in place should the worse occur. But I think… I think this is an opportunity we can’t afford to pass up.”

“Nobody knows the First Order better than Kylo Ren.” One of the intelligence officers piped up, eyes blinking owlishly from behind their thick glasses. “Well, except for General Hux, but he doesn’t join the field.”

“That’s assuming we can get any information out of us before he inevitably breaks free and kills us all.” Miles pointed out sullenly.

There was one thing she appreciated about the man, even if she couldn’t give a fig for anything else. Miles, she knew, wanted the best interests of the Militia, even if they disagreed on how to go about it. She knew his complaints were valid, that he made good points, even if she tended to take them with a grain of salt.

“We will.” She shook her head. “And if it feels like things are slipping out of control, I’ll kill him.”

Stela wasn’t helpless, and she intended to see to their prisoner personally. If things got out of hand, she had the Force—maybe her training wasn’t as refined as Ren’s, but he was on suppressants and she had lightning.

“Looks like you’ll get to find out.” Kane hummed. “Your prisoner just woke up.”

[littleprincesstae]

Perfect Imperfections: Chapter 1

House Rules:

Major decisions must be discussed and made together.

There must be cooked food at all times.

There must be fresh fruits and vegetables at all times.

Both Tae and Daddy must, at least once a month, clean the house thoroughly.

No swearing under any circumstances.

Saturday and Sunday are pajama days unless otherwise stated.

Sunday is Bonding day-- no television, no phone, no tablet, and no laptop day (unless there’s an emergency).

Daddy feeds the fishes in the mornings and Tae in the evenings.

Work-related matters are kept to the bare minimum when at home.

The weekend is strictly no work day.

There aren’t many rules in the Jeon household, but the ones that are set in place are obeyed by everyone to the best of their abilities.

Jeongguk tries to not bring his work home, but being a partner at one of the better-known law firms in the state makes it inevitable for him to not answer some e-mails during commercial breaks or while waiting for the food to be ready; there are always unread e-mails in his inbox and he’s constantly reading, replying, and composing to the point where he can probably do it in his sleep. It’s strenuous, at times, especially when he notices the subtle downturn of Tae’s lips or the way the little cuddles up to him quietly and just sits there, watching as Jeongguk types on his laptop, but it’s a necessary evil. Jeongguk’s work gives them the roof over their heads, the food they eat, clothes they wear, and everything they need (also things they don’t need, like the two coffee and popcorn machines, which Jeongguk had reasoned with himself were just in case.)

Reading and answering e-mail is the only work related thing he's allowed to do, though, his phone being put on ‘do not disturb’ mode the moment he enters the house. Some of his clients still believe that Jeongguk is at their disposal during all hours of the day, so he was forced to talk to his partners (who are also two of his best friends), Seokjin and Namjoon, soon after Tae moved in with him. What his clients are doing is very inconvenient and insensitive and the three of them agreed that it would be best for him to ignore his phone when he’s at home. If there is an emergency and they need to reach him, Seokjin and Namjoon know to call his home phone.There aren’t many hours between Jeongguk coming home and heading to bed, so he wants to spend as much time as Tae as he possibly can without anyone intervening, especially snobby clients who think they own Jeongguk and his services.

Even then, he hates not being able to give Tae the attention he deserves but is endlessly happy and proud of how understanding his little princess is. He understands that Jeongguk’s work is important and he tries to help as much as he can by playing quietly or making him coffee when he notices the big yawns that shake through Jeongguk’s tired body. The elder is proud and lucky, and it makes him wonder what he’s done to deserve such a precious life-partner like Tae (Taehyung not excluded.)

Because of his busy weekdays, Jeongguk tries to make up for the time they’ve lost on the weekends. At first, he took Tae out to different amusement parks, then he took him to playgrounds and picnics, but when he noticed that Tae was much livelier and happier when they were goofing around in the house, Jeongguk changed tactics.

They stay up late on Fridays watching movies and eating candy (dubbed Candy Day by Tae), snuggled up against each other, and go to bed when Tae’s half-asleep against Jeongguk, his eyes half-lidded and heavy. On Saturdays, Tae is the first one up (leaving Jeongguk to sleep, because he knows how tired he is from work), sneaking out of bed at around nine to play with his dolls and watch cartoons until eleven, which is when he starts to feel really hungry and goes to wake Jeongguk up with barely suppressed giggles and small kisses against his face and lips. It takes around ten to twenty minutes for Jeongguk to even manage to keep his eyes open for more than two seconds, and even longer than that for him to get up and be a functional human being. In that time Tae patiently waits and tells him what he wants to do that day. They have a nice routine.

The fun part about the weekends is that they're all different and honestly, Jeongguk doesn't know what they'll be doing as it's usually Tae who decides on the day's program either when he's waking Jeongguk up on Saturday or if it requires leaving the house, Friday afternoon. It's exciting, to say the least, and sometimes Jeongguk thinks he's more excited for the weekends than Tae is.

Sometimes they make animal-shaped pancakes or eggs, other times they make waffles or grilled-cheese sandwiches, or they go to the bakery down the street to buy something from there, which they end up eating in the backyard if the weather is nice enough. Sometimes they watch a movie if their stomachs feel particularly full, or they just head to Tae’s playroom for a fun day involving anything from dressing up (Tae as the princess and Jeongguk as Prince Charming, though sometimes it's the other way around) to painting their nails (yes, even Jeongguk’s), to making their own fairytale books (so far, they have two: Kiki the Clumsy Monkey and Once Upon a Time in the Jungle). They do many things together, most of them ridiculous to the point where they need to shower (Tae has these little balloons filled with paint and they sometimes use to re-enact battle scenes out in the backyard and end up covered in paint), but those moments make some of the most precious memories and Jeongguk will not give them up for anything.

Most of the time it’s fun and games, but when rules are broken, punishment ensues and Jeongguk is very strict about punishments, even if his heart breaks a little at seeing Tae upset and in tears. Early on they agreed that before any punishment is carried out, they must discuss why either of them is being punished so they understand what they’ve done wrong. That way they learn from their mistakes and don’t repeat them, something Tae has struggles with from time to time.

Daddies getting punished for breaking rules isn’t common, at least to Jeongguk’s knowledge, because they don’t have rules, at least, not the way littles ones do. That’s why, when he brought the matter up with Tae, the little had giggled cutely and said, “Daddies don’t get punished,” thinking it was a joke. Jeongguk had been and still is serious, because for him it’s important for Tae to understand that despite everything, they are equal when it comes to rules and breaking them. He is Tae’s Daddy; he takes care of Tae day and night and loves him more than life itself, which is why it’s important for him to show his little that breaking the rules has consequences for everyone, not just littles ones. It’s important for Jeongguk to show Tae that everyone gets punished when they break the rules, no matter who they are or what they do. And that everyone makes mistakes once in a while, and that it’s okay to make mistakes as long as you realize what you’ve done wrong and try not to do it again.

Figuring out punishments for Jeongguk had been difficult because he can’t get a spanking or put into time out, but they managed at the end, especially once Tae said that not all punishments have to be painful. As long as they make you think and reflect on what you did, then they’ve successfully done their job. After praising his princess and gifting him with a new set of nail polishes, they wrote the following punishments down:

Half an hour on the treadmill on a setting of Tae’s choice.

Hundred pushups/pullups while counting aloud.

Seven-minute plank.

Clean the aquarium.

Besides the house rules, there are also Jeongguk’s rules for himself, and for his princess, and Tae’s rules of himself, and for his Daddy. It’s important that both of them have rules for each other, but also rules for themselves. It’s what keeps them both grounded and also what helps Tae feel in control of himself. He needs those rules to help him navigate in the real world, but also in his head, something the little has problems with from time to time.

Jeongguk’s rules for Tae are printed on a pink sheet of paper, the edges decorated with little crowns and stars, with birds and hearts scattered across the page. There’s a lot of glitter and stickers and some words are difficult to read, but Tae’s eyes glow every time he looks at the frame, so Jeongguk doesn’t really think it matters as long as it makes his princess happy.

Daddy’s rules for his princess:

Always tell Daddy if you are having unhappy thoughts.

No secrets - Daddy can’t help if he doesn’t know what the problem is.

No lying - always tell Daddy the truth and nothing but the truth.

Always answer your phone, unless there’s a very good reason not to.

Always tell Daddy if he said or did something that made you unhappy.

Daddy’s office is off-limits unless otherwise stated.

Always be extra careful when alone in the kitchen.

Never hesitate to call Daddy if something is wrong, even if he’s at work.

Then there are Tae’s rules for Jeongguk, which are printed on a red sheet of paper at Tae’s insistence (“Red is Daddy’s favorite color, so it has to bed red!”, “Okay, princess, if you say so.”) with hearts and musical notes and honestly, how could Jeongguk have said no when the little had looked at him with sparkling puppy eyes and a bright smile? Jeongguk’s happiness revolves around Tae and he is weak.

Tae’s rules for Daddy:

Treat Tae with respect and love.

Please, don’t lose your temper when you’ve had a bad day at work.

Tell Tae if something is making Daddy unhappy - Tae is always there for Daddy just like Daddy is always there for Tae.

Don’t break any promises you’ve made.

Always be honest with Tae, just like Tae is always honest with you.

When Tae was making his own rules he asked Jeongguk to help him because he wasn't sure what to write, and it was making him anxious. Jeongguk knows of Tae's many struggles and exactly how hard it was for him to ask Jeongguk for something so big, so it makes Jeongguk feel even more appreciative when recalling that particular memory. He tried to make the rules simple and easy to follow, yet also encouraging and positive, and with Tae's help, they managed to create a list of the most important rules Tae needs to follow.

Tae’s personal rules:

Daddy loves you and wants what’s best for you - do not think otherwise!

Always tell Daddy if something is troubling you or Taehyung, even if you feel like it’s nothing important.

Your feelings are important!

Your problems are real, even if they feel insignificant and made-up - do not think otherwise!

You do not annoy Daddy, even if you sometimes think you annoy him - it’s not true!

Give Daddy lots of kisses every day!

Always smile for Daddy! He loves your smiles!

And, of course, Jeongguk’s rules, which are just as important as the rest of the rules, because even Daddies need guidance, sometimes, and to be reminded of certain things, like how punishments are important. Even though Jeongguk is strict, he has a weakness when it comes to Tae, and punishing his little is very difficult for him, even if he knows it's necessary, which is why he sometimes needs a reminder.

Jeongguk’s personal rules:

Help Tae prepare for the day (pick out clothes, help with his hair and makeup)

Always give Tae your attention - the more the better.

Give Tae treats when he’s being good.

When a rule is broken, be strict.

Always praise Tae, even if he hasn’t done anything of importance.

Tae’s bedtime is also your bedtime (unless there’s an important work-related matter you need to deal with)

Tae’s punishments were the hardest to come up with, because the little was so emotionally fragile, even the smallest things could set him off. Punishments like spanking were completely out of the question, because of reasons Jeongguk tries to not think about anymore, and washing his mouth with soap wasn’t really on the table since Tae never said bad things. Even though it made him pout and whine, Tae sat with Jeongguk when he was asked and both of them made six punishments they were satisfied with and which worked and got the job done.

Tae’s punishments:

Fifty lines of the broken rule in the Punish Notebook.

Sweets restriction.

Time-outs (length depending on the rule that has been broken)

Grounding - no playdates, no playtime, no TV, no phone or laptop, and definitely no games.

No talking for a specific period of time.

No kissing Daddy for a period of time.

[yegfoodie]

One of the most epic places in the city of Edmonton to be able to support your local small businesses, find sustainable and healthy food choices and get that “Farm to Fork” experience is the Old Strathcona Farmer’s Market. 

The market started outdoors in 1983 in the space that is now the free parking.  It is now Edmonton’s largest year-round indoor market with approximately 10,000 people through the door each Saturday. 

A team of Edmonton bloggers was invited to a meet and greet with some of the local producers and farmers this past weekend.  This was their first “food tour” and they called it the “Picnic Edition”. 

It was an early start for some, but the market gets busy (and quite crowded) quickly.

After we were all introduced to our lovely Hostess, April, we were on our way to our first stop which was Sunworks Farm. 

Sheila was very passionate when she was talking about her farm and the way that the animals are treated humanely and respectfully.  Coming from an indigenous background myself, this is something that has always been important to me.  The animals should be treated well, killed humanely and we should use as many parts from snout to tail as we are able.  Sunworks does all those things. 

Their farm was started because their daughter had such severe allergies and food sensitivities that they needed to be able to grow their own food.  They started out feeding themselves and through a few requests started raising a little bit more, and a little bit more until it grew into what it is today.  No farming background.  Amazing! 

Free range, BCSPCA certified humane, grass fed, certified organic and “as close to nature as possible”.

These folks are passionate about their farm and their animals and it shows.  The end products are delicious, good for you AND celiac safe and allergy free.  The Chicken Moroccan sausages are so good. 

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Sunworks has an open farm day on September 3.  Go and meet the family, have lunch and get a tour.  You need to REGISTER to attend.  See you there!  

  Our next stop is now one of my new favourite things to eat!  

Alex from Golomein Noodle House introduced us to his fresh, healthy and convenient meal packs.

There is always a lovely story on how every small business started and Alex’s story is inspiring as well:

“Our Dad developed the recipe initially 52 years ago where he worked the streets of Brunei, as a hawker trying to earn enough money to support a family of 10.  Struggling agains all odds, he developed the awesome recipe he would later bring to North America”.

He made his noodles only to serve his friends, family and coworkers charging them only for their gas and their time it took them to visit his home.  He even delivered packages to his mother who always looked forward to the tasty treat. 

The fabulous noodles caught on and before long, everyone wanted more.  People searched for the delicious meals, but they were at the mercy of whenever Dad felt like making them and his kitchen was the only place this amazing taste could be found.

Alex, the youngest was unable to sleep one night , so he decided to do a marathon session of watching 5 episodes of “Dragon’s Den”.  Tired of beating his head in the corporate world, he decided a change was in order.

It brought back memories of the work his Dad put into his noodle recipe that he created over 50 years ago.  The noodles were so good that Alex’s childhood friend, Paris, would rid his way too small bike halfway across the city just to eat the noodles. 

Recognizing the incredible opportunity before him, he immediately told his 2 brothers, Albert and Allen.  Alex’s enthusiasm was infectious and it didn’t take much convincing to persuade his 2 siblings to join his quest to bring their dad’s noodle recipe to the masses.  All 3 brothers were excited about continuing their beloved Dad’s legacy and making noodles for future generations.”

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For the meal packs, the noodles are lovingly prepared and then packaged in a neatly folded square of butcher paper.  They are then frozen.  They are sold individually ($11) or in packages of 5 ($50).  You simply pop the frozen package, paper and all in the microwave for 5 to 6 minutes and then unfold the package to open and enjoy!  You don’t even need to transfer the contents to a plate or bowl.  They are available in beef or pork.  

If you crave them like I do, the family has a restaurant waaaaay in the south with a more varied menu. Worth the drive!

Next stop was Mojo Jojo Pickles and Preserves.  Johwanna has been an Edmonton staple for many years now.  She is definitely a pickling artist and knows how to make the vinegar bend to her will!

Salted caramel pear butter… Do I even need to say anything else?  We were treated to some very lovely marscapone grilled cheese sandwiches with some equally lovely pear butter to dip it in.  This was simply joy on the tongue!  The pear butter would go well with so many things, as do many of her pickled veggies.  Charcuterie anyone? 

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Johwanna was also sampling “Shrubs” which is a drinking vinegar.  I had no idea how tasty they are.  I am a new fan!  

If you can’t make it to the market, Johwanna has a store on the website where you can purchase most of the products. 

Nancy from Market Pizza was our next stop.  “Delicious take & bake pizza made with the finest ingredients”.   The booth smells amazing!  They offer samples all day. 

If you would like to make your own creation, they also offer frozen, ready-made crusts.  They have a secret recipe that makes it the lightest pizza crust that I have ever come across. It is not a thin crust, but it is light and airy, almost like the dough is whipped before baking.  

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The take & bake pizzas are frozen and are $15 each.  There are some amazing flavours available and it will be a different mix every Saturday at the market.  I tried the Bacon Cheeseburger and the Donair pizzas.  It was like you were eating a cheeseburger or a donair, just a flat version without the traditional bun or wrap.  Both of them were delicious, but my favourite out of the two was the donair pizza.  A donair eating experience without all the mess!  

I can’t wait to get my hands on another.  

Monica with Rainbow Acres was our next stop.  Berry farm extraordinaire!! 

How Rainbow Acres farms differently:

From Dave’s own market garden specific equipment to their modified old granary pack house, Dave and Monica are masters at making use of materials to fit their needs. This kind of instinctual innovation is part of what makes their operation so unique.

Their incredible variety of crops is a result of their eagerness to try anything new that comes to their attention. They like to “dabble” in many crops to see what will thrive on their land and add to their already diverse produce offerings. Anytime something new comes up, they want to try it out.

When they started in 1989, Dave and Monica were cautioned against doing fruits and veggies at the same time because their harvest seasons overlapped. While it can be an intense work load, they’ve been making it work for years. While most of their fruit is used in processing their delicious jams, jellies and juices, in her commercial kitchen Monica also processes many of the veggies that are leftover from market. To make sure none of their product ever goes to waste, Rainbow Acres regularly donates left over fresh produce to the Edmonton and Leduc Food Banks.

And those are just the Coles notes!  Rainbow Acres is famous for their carrots, but they have a wide selection of preserves to choose from at the market.  These are some hard working farmers!  

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I used to help my Grandmother with the canning, pickles and jam.  It’s a lot of hard work!  Rainbow Acres makes it easy for you to stock up for the winter and to pop a few of their products into a gift basket at Christmas time (its close folks!) 

Martina’s Vegan House, where veggies are sexy, is up next. 

I got the impression that the Peanut Brittle is what Martina’s passion is.  Vegan Peanut Brittle is available in the regular version, or the spicy version.  The spicy version is amazing.  

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Martina has frozen vegan meals, soups and stews at her booth for all of you folks that are passionate about plant based eating!

Doef’s Greenhouses visit was a bit of an eye opener.  The family has been farming since 1979.  What is grown today is all done hydroponically in greenhouses which allows vegetable production all year round.  Currently the greenhouses span 11 acres and employ 50 people. I had no idea that we even had such an operation near Edmonton.  

Tomatoes are what they started with, their grape tomatoes are juicy and full of flavour. The main crops continue to be Long English cucumbers, mini cucumbers, tomatoes, and bell peppers, with small amounts of eggplant and hot peppers as well.

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Birds & Bees Organic Winery and Meadery was the next stop.  My Grandfather kept bees so I was fortunate to see the whole process of how the honey was extracted from the hives.  A sweet treat for me as a child was to be able to chew on the beeswax that had a bit of honey left behind.  As an adult I still love the smell of beeswax and used to be obsessed with making candles. 

From the website: 

“Birds & Bees Organic Winery and Meadery straddles the fine line between naughty and nice – and sometimes more. Flirtatiously flavored and seductively styled, our full-bodied wines and mead are always up for a one night stand or an evening rendezvous. 

But, you can’t have your Marilyn Monroe without your Jackie-O.

A little restraint can make a true romance.

So how do you like it? The purity and innocence of the Bird? Or the seductive tease of the Bee?”

The statement above from the website sums things up quite nicely.  Naughty names like “Kinky Cranberry” and “Big Tease Raspberry” adorn the bottles.  If you visit the website, it gives you the sassy profile of the wine and tells you what it pairs best with.  

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The wines and meads are available at some liquor stores in Edmonton. Liquor Connect can help you find them! 

Ben was next up with Farm Fresh Lamb/Blacksheep Farm 

Another reason why I love the farmer’s market: Sustainably grown & humanely treated without the use of animal by-products or growth promotants.  No antibiotics, no animal by-products.  The sheep are fed a mixture of oats, barley, yellow peas and alfalfa hay grown on the farm in the Peace Country, and allowed to pasture graze during the summer months.

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I find that when you treat the animals well and give them a good diet, the meat tastes much better.  With lamb, if it is butchered properly, it doesn’t have that “gamey” taste that a lot of people complain about.  I am going to be looking up all kinds of lamb recipes now!  

  Last, but certainly not least was Sean from Mighty Trio.  (no website)  From Organic Box:

  “Mighty Trio Organics is a family owned and operated business located on a beautiful acreage just outside of Redwater Alberta. They are both a manufacturer and distributer of highly nutritious, fresh foods such as hemp, flax, and canola oils. This allows them the opportunity to interact directly with customers and seed producers. By bringing people closer to the farms where their food is grown they are able to provide the freshest, most nutrient rich foods available. Mighty Trio Organics values the environment and supports local businesses, which is why they only use seeds that are grown as close to their facility as possible. By supporting Mighty Trio Organics you are also supporting local farmers and because their products have not traveled great distances, you are also making a friendlier choice for our planet. Mighty Trio Organics provides you and your family with the fats, fibers, proteins and nutrients essential for healthy bodies and minds. To your good health!”

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“Smoke Point” is a thing.  Hemp is not recommended for frying.  Canola on the other hand has a pretty high smoke point compared to other oils.  So the hemp and flax oils are great for salad dressings etc.  In fact Culina has done a collaboration project with Mighty Trio to make their salad dressing. 

This food tour was an absolutely wonderful experience.  It gave me the opportunity to get to know the people behind the brand.  I am very passionate about shopping local, but not necessarily someone that will approach the owners to get to know them.  This was very informative and very fun.  

I look forward to meeting more of the vendors for the next round, and sharing them with you! 

  New Blog Post: OSFM Quarterly Local Food Tour - Picnic Edition! Meet 10 of the @strathconamrkt vendors. #yegfood #newfriends One of the most epic places in the city of Edmonton to be able to support your local small businesses, find sustainable and healthy food choices and get that "Farm to Fork" experience is the…