#also ive been giving less belief to stuff that i know isnt real

[cadaverousdecay]

i got a notification for an article that talks about how to combat a lack of energy and had to go “its okay, we’re in a pandemic and lots of people are tired so its a common topic, the universe is not directing it at me because it saw ive been tired these past days, a lack of energy is a common trait, its purely coincidence you arent being watched its fine”

[enderspawn]

so now that we’ve had a few days since the syndicate stream, i think ive managed to cool down and step back to look at it more neutrally. ended up long and pretty rambly since its all pretty flow of consciousness so its under the cut, but heres some thoughts on the syndicate (and a bit on c!techno, since hes the originator)

in universe, techno has only just heard a new place was made. he doesn’t know jack abt it, so he goes over to check it out and learn whats happening. he meets w tubbo, who explains they arent a gov, and accepts it then goes. hes hesitant abt the nukes, but frankly? also understandable, they are nukes. any kind of mass weapon of destruction is something to look out for, same as if tubbo revealed his own wither vault. 

i think the reason that i, and many other ppl, had such a NEGATIVE reaction to what is a mainly harmless and completely reasonable interaction is. well, bc we’re the audience. we KNOW more than c!techno does. we know that snowchester very explicitly was formed without a government because they’re afraid of techno attacking. we know that the nukes are made to defend them, based off what happened to lmanberg. we know that ranboo joined partially to try and spare snowchester if worst came to worst. 

the reason we the audience were afraid of him going is bc we feared what would happen if he DID deem it a gov. bc we know the effort they’ve done to NOT be one, bc we have a connection to the town that c!techno doesnt. 

after then came calling the syndicate/techno tyrannical. after all- if they strike down every government then they are forcing ppl to follow their beliefs under threat of destruction or death. which is uhh pretty fucking tyrannical. 

the thing is that in the end the syndicate hasnt even done enough for us to like. KNOW if thats true. techno himself said hes totally fine w just group of people living together, hell hes in a damn SYNDICATE. you can def argue in general abt what gives the syndicate the right at all to decide if a gov deserves to exist, if being “”the deciders”” makes them inherently hypocritical. (this also is pushing that “they decide” bc, well, w the exception of tubbo now, theres very little chance the other ppl would win against techno and crew. it Would just be decimation. if they attack, they’re destroying it all). 

after all, they preach abt giving ppl the right to choose but then dont let them choose to form a gov. paradox of tolerance i suppose, since in anarchistic views there isnt like a “non-corrupt” government so every government is worth dismantling. (note, this is all based off my p limited understanding of anarchy theory and also Very Simplified for ease of speaking)

another reason we the audience may have been so afraid is bc, historically, techno doesnt lose. he may suffer personal losses and feelings of betrayal, but narratively hes won every battle hes really been in. its the status quo, so any possible conflict in the future you kind of expect the same. we were afraid of any kind of conflict starting. 

i think this stuff does kinda work in character too. c!tubbo admits himself he doesnt rlly know government stuff, and he doesnt seem to really know what techno would or wouldnt DEEM one- thus he has a similar fear to the audience of being struck down for it. ranboo, like stated before, partially joined bc he was afraid FOR snowchester. 

again i get that anarchy is against that greater establishment, but theres something to be said for the fact that. well. this is a block game. its systems work a LOT differently than real life, and real life anarchist theory may not transfer over well. there are a lot of good posts ive seen recently analysing lmanberg (specifically early lmanberg) and like. it genuinely worked to protect its citizens. they were able to pool together their resources and man power and protect each other from outside threats that would overpower them seperately. there IS no big overarching societal and deeply built in system to overthrow like in real life, if anything “having a government” IS the new system trying to form instead of anarchy (bc, to my knowledge, lmanberg was the first real “government” and the dream smp’s gov kinda formed as a response) it could def be another reason so many ppl are against enforcing anarchy-- this isnt the real world, and being in solidified groups could help the weak. without that, instead its the strongest survive and thrive while everyone else suffers. 

(then again to devils advocate my own point, a lot of times they’re referring in those posts to a time where wilbur, who was actually “in charge” wasnt around a ton, so there was less of a power structure in place. also, you CAN still have a group of ppl without being a “gov” (like snowchester or the syndicate) but then we get back to “what is a gov by the syndicate’s standards” as well as if they want to remove a gov at its start or JUST when it seems “tyrannical” (so if they believe a gov is inherently tyrannical). like if i started a direct democracy gov and explicitly called it a gov, do you take it down? its taking the opinion of all citizens and allows everyone equal power. is that corrupt just bc its ALSO a gov, or does it get to stay? where is the line?  idk man maybe give the gov like a free trial. if it starts being corrupt then step in but if they’re vibin they’re vibin. chill w the anarchy /lh /hj JFKDLSJF)

idk man this isnt fully conclusion imo i just wanted to long think abt this. also fuck this block game for getting into legit political theory and ethics and shit. “is someone valid in doing something for another person that they believe will help the other person if it limits their personal freedom” (or, is techno correct in enforcing anarchy bc he believes it is the best form for ppl, EVEN at the cost of their personal freedoms to make a gov) is too deep to be asking for a fuckin block potato pig. this is why i dont do a ton of discourse im just stupid and it starts getting philosophical at some point FDSKLFJ

yall can respond w your own thoughts to this if you want, even debate it!, but idk if ill respond bc uhhhh Brain Empty fdjsklfj i just wanted to ramble and sort out my own thoughts on the matter now that im not uber pissed at c!techno JFKDLSJFKL

[lokbobpop]

Fact

The definition of a fact is something that is true or something that has occurred or has been proven correct. An example of a fact is that the world is round. An example of a fact is the detail about a driver texting while driving that is told to the court and reported in a news story.

The word "fact" derives from the Latin factum, and was first used in English with the same meaning: a thing done or performed a meaning now obsolete. The common usage of "something that has really occurred or is the case" dates from the middle of the sixteenth century.

Fact f act fa ct fac t

Writing fact

Fact or fiction in a Liberty I remember asking what does this mean and being told what os real and not real and i saw the not real far more exciting as a kid i wasn’t interested as a child in fact really as i grow up into my teens i like to read books jolly copper and Jackie Collins all books about romance sex and the likes lol but hen it darned on me its just not real i dotn want something that isnt real i want real things i what to see real stuff and i stop reading these books later i came across the road less traveled it was in hk early days not sure how i found the book but it must of been before the girls as i wouldnt have had the time to read it for sure but his book changed something in my it was that who i think i am isnt really real id somehow made these assumptions about myself and have believed them. So later i got into ehart tolle and Ganga ge and all the new age stuff in til i found my real rd less traveled desteni this where that book lead me to myself here me discovering me all the others showed me what others had obtained but not really building you to it where desteni does it walks you through you the only way tp free yourself from your mind.

Reading fact

What is fact and what is fiction at the moment or for so many years now is just now known who knows what is fact and what is fiction there is so much that is wrong but seen as right and so much that is right but seen as wrong you just have to make your own mind up on what sis best for all this is the only way to go what is best because the fact and fiction is so messed up know you just cant tell one from another we have lived out so many lies we dont even know our own lies let along another’s so look at where you are lying where are you deceiving your self and find your truth.

Knowing hte facts i like to know the facts i like people who know the truth and i make there truth my fact but isnt that funny when you think about it someone’s else fact becoming your truth like you have agreed with what that say to the point no this is also your belief but this is just there variant of it it has been coated in them from where they have come from what they have lived so not completely a truth it has been added to or taken away in some form to become there truth and you will add to and take away what you want ot sit with you so is anything real? No its always someone’s else’s story so this is the point of making your own story which is best for you and live the highest truth of your self.

Thoughts of not really knowing anything as fact the sun rices and sets i am female i am married i have two girls fact when who iam inside how much is fact ot fiction I ask myself with the comparison blame hate revenge which is all really my fiction its not real its not really me its all fiction i am not these thoughts i am just giving them my energy so they live these un truths about me these lies about me that i have aloud to Rome and rule my self into so many bad decisions that i now say to here no more i need you not thoughts of her mind that do not support me i only want ot live my true fact me who i really am within me.

I love documentaries which great facts of cause they are someone’s else’s facts but some are great facts if not tampered with by the powers that be you can really learn stuff about our planet and out environment our evil minds lol

Saying fact.

It is a fact of life that we have been lost in out minds even the powers that be have not been actually living there own truth they have been living power and greed and the deep state also have been living what they thought was best for themselves only as i had anu and his gang of merry men they all have been lost and not we have to make sure it all never happens again.

Fact finder boot sure what this is probably a Internet thing search engine

Factor 50 the suntan lotion ive thought was bad for me but the ozone gone was the reall problem not the lotion :)

Knowing the facts about things like finding out the facts

Is fact real at the moment no its not all real until we all get real with ourselves then things will get real.

Sf

Does this definition support me no it has so much all over the place going on we all need to find our own facts out together within ourselves to become real factor ourselves so we live fact and no more fiction of the mind

Fact fu act

Fact

To know me the truth of me of who i am without the mind to live me to be me and to live no more lies of me

The truth of self in self honesty

I will live this word to support me in finding the truth about me and the fact of who i am and who i can be so others can see there truths about themselves and free ourselves from the mind.

[razzledazzlefoshazzle]

1-200?

200:

My crush’s name is: Cassie

199:

I was born in: 1998, Australia, NSW

198:

I am really: I am really annoyed that you wanna know so much about me anon y u do dis

197:

My cellphone company is: Optus

196:

My eye color is: Brown

195:

My shoe size is: 11 Australia Mens

194:

My ring size is: i dont know

193:

My height is: 181cm or 5′10″ i tihnk

192:

I am allergic to: NOTHING I AM UNSTOPPABLE

191:

My 1st car was: No Car

190:

My 1st job was: I was an assistant at some guys authentic pizza shop. He was an asshole and i shouldve killed him before quitting.

189:

Last book you read: Ready Player One

188:

My bed is: My bed is my one true love and warm machine luv u bb

187:

My pet:  I have 2 dogs they’re fluffy love muffins called Pepsi (boy) Bella (Girl) ill post photos of them later!

186:

My best friend:

@schotts-fired

at this point i have as many memes with Kat as i do my real life best friend.

185:

My favorite shampoo is: Really nice smelling ones.

184:

Xbox or ps3: PS3

183:

Piggy banks are: Piggy banks are dumb i have a golden pineapple for my spare change.

182:

In my pockets:  earphones.

181:

On my calendar: every friday i do stuff but thats it

180:

Marriage is: cool

179:

Spongebob can: produce good memes

178:

My mom: Isnt nice i probably wont talk to her once i move out.

177:

The last three songs I bought were?Buying? Songs?

176:

Last YouTube video watched: Masculinity by Mr Sark

175:

How many cousins do you have? at least 3

174:

Do you have any siblings? 3 Brothers and a Sister ive seen twice

173:

Are your parents divorced? Yes

172:

Are you taller than your mom? Hell yeah shes a goblin at like 150cm.

171:

Do you play an instrument? No

170:

What did you do yesterday? I slept, watched movies, complained about the internet being down.

[ I Believe In ]

169:

Love at first sight: Not unless its a dog

168:

Luck: No but if someone does something better than me they’re lucky >:(

167:

Fate: No

166:

Yourself: No

165:

Aliens: I wish they would fix everything

164:

Heaven: Questioning my religious beliefs lately

163:

Hell: ^

162:

God: ^

161:

Horoscopes: No but they’re funny to read

160:

Soul mates: No.

159:

Ghosts: NOT BUT LIKE ALIENS I WANT THEM TO BE REAL GHOSTS PLEASE BE REAL.

158:

Gay Marriage: Yah its about as good as straight marriage

157:

War: its about as shit as i am

156:

Orbs: what are these?

155:

Magic: Refer to both ghosts and aliens.

[ This or That ]

154:

Hugs or Kisses: Hugs

153:

Drunk or High: Drunk

152:

Phone or Online: Online

151:

Red heads or Black haired: Red Heads

150:

Blondes or Brunettes: Brunettes

149:

Hot or cold: Cold

148:

Summer or winter: Winter

147:

Autumn or Spring: Spring

146:

Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate

145:

Night or Day: Night

144:

Oranges or Apples: Apples

143:

Curly or Straight hair: Straight

142:

McDonalds or Burger King: McDonalds

141:

White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: White Chocolate

140:

Mac or PC: PC

139:

Flip flops or high heals: High heals like healing in video games am i right?

138:

Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Sweet and Poor

137:

Coke or Pepsi: Coke

136:

Hillary or Obama: Obama

135:

Burried or cremated: Burried so i may rise again!

134:

Singing or Dancing: Dancing

133:

Coach or Chanel: What

132:

Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks:Who

131:

Small town or Big city: Big City

130:

Wal-Mart or Target: Target

129:

Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Adam Sandler

128:

Manicure or Pedicure: neither? 

127:

East Coast or West Coast: East coast cause western australia is a bunch of weirdos

126:

Your Birthday or Christmas: My birthday cause giving gifts is hard and spending time with people is easy.

125:

Chocolate or Flowers:Chocolate

124:

Disney or Six Flags: Disney

123:

Yankees or Red Sox: is that sports?

[ Here’s What I Think About ]

122:

War: War Never Changes

121:

George Bush: He definitely did sleep with that woman.

120:

Gay Marriage: Good again!

119:

The presidential election: Trump is a rollercoaster of emotion ranging from bad to worse. At least the memes are good!

118:

Abortion: Choice

117:

MySpace: Had some pretty good games on it

116:

Reality TV: awful

115:

Parents:  My parents? Out of the 4 ive had i like one of them.

114:

Back stabbers: What kind of question is this i hate them.

113:

Ebay: Dont use ebay really.

112:

Facebook: The thing i use so real life friends can contact me its trash.

111:

Work: My experiences have been, less than pleasant.

110:

My Neighbors: I dont know any of my neighbours but they’re rude and dont reply to my hello’s.

109:

Gas Prices: i dont fucking know

108:

Designer Clothes: I dont care for clothes i wear tshirts and trackies all the time.

107:

College: No opinion on call egg.

106:

Sports: Fun to play boring to watch

105:

My family: i like my dad and my brothers

104:

The future: must be better than now?

[ Last time I ]

103:

Hugged someone: someone i wasnt related to like a month ago

102:

Last time you ate: literally always

101:

Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: last friday

100:

Cried in front of someone: fucking years ago i dont cry in front of people anymore

99:

Went to a movie theater: like a month ago

98:

Took a vacation: never

97:

Swam in a pool: 3 months ago

96:

Changed a diaper: never

95:

Got my nails done: a year ago

94:

Went to a wedding: also a year ago

93:

Broke a bone: never

92:

Got a peircing: never

91:

Broke the law: never

90:

Texted: couple hours ago

[ MISC ]

89:

Who makes you laugh the most: myself, anime

@schotts-fired

88:

Something I will really miss when I leave home is: the internet

87:

The last movie I saw: Taking of Pelham 123

86:

The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: Finding my happiness again

85:

The thing im not looking forward to: my ex making social interactions awkward again

84:

People call me: Jack

83:

The most difficult thing to do is: get out of bed, finish breakfast

82:

I have gotten a speeding ticket: no

81:

My zodiac sign is: Sagittarius 

80:

The first person i talked to today was:

@whoneedsasociallife

79:

First time you had a crush: Primary School one of my Teachers

78:

The one person who i can’t hide things from: Nobody.

77:

Last time someone said something you were thinking: Constantly

76:

Right now I am talking to: Nobody

75:

What are you going to do when you grow up: Anything hopefully ill be happy

74:

I have/will get a job: Someday

73:

Tomorrow: Movies with dad, night with friends

72:

Today: nothing

71:

Next Summer: nothing

70:

Next Weekend: also nothing

69:

I have these pets: 2 diggity doggos

68:

The worst sound in the world: the sound my computer makes when it bluescreens while music it playing

67:

The person that makes me cry the most is: my ex

66:

People that make you happy: almost nobody

65:

Last time I cried: like 5 hours ago

64:

My friends are: trash shit garbage

63:

My computer is: absolute trash after so many issues im planning on getting a new one

62:

My School: sucked complete ass i was abused by a teacher

61:

My Car: doesnt exist

60:

I lose all respect for people who: no answer

59:

The movie I cried at was: anything that involves any form of friendship and love, or dogs dying

58:

Your hair color is: brown

57:

TV shows you watch: read my about

56:

Favorite web site: tumblr/youtube

55:

Your dream vacation: the fucking moon

54:

The worst pain I was ever in was: I had a cough last year that completely killed my voice and tore up my throat, coughed up blood

53:

How do you like your steak cooked: Well Done

52:

My room is: Clean and tidy af

51:

My favorite celebrity is: none

50:

Where would you like to be: in the future

49:

Do you want children: no

48:

Ever been in love: yes it fucking ruined me

47:

Who’s your best friend:

@schotts-fired

we already have more memes than my irl best friend

46:

More guy friends or girl friends: girl friends

45:

One thing that makes you feel great is: memes

44:

One person that you wish you could see right now: nobody tbh

43:

Do you have a 5 year plan: nope

42:

Have you made a list of things to do before you die: climb Mt. Everest, thats it

41:

Have you pre-named your children: nope

40:

Last person I got mad at: myself

39:

I would like to move to: a place with good internet

38:

I wish I was a professional: Twitch Streamer

[ My Favorites ]

37:

Candy: Red Licorice

36:

Vehicle: Shopping trolleys i guess

35:

President: Obama

34:

State visited: I dont travel

33:

Cellphone provider: Optus

32:

Athlete: None

31:

Actor: None

30:

Actress: None

29:

Singer: None

28:

Band: None

27:

Clothing store: None

26:

Grocery store:None

25:

TV show: Doctor Who

24:

Movie: Cant remember

23:

Website: Tumblr/Youtube

22:

Animal: Dogs

21:

Theme park: Wet n’ Wild

20:

Holiday: New Years

19:

Sport to watch: None

18:

Sport to play: None

17:

Magazine: None

16:

Book: Ready Player One

15:

Day of the week: Friday

14:

Beach: Nobbys Beach 

13:

Concert attended: None

12:

Thing to cook: Potato Bake

11:

Food: Pork Ribs

10:

Restaurant: Any place that sells pork ribs

9:

Radio station: None.

8:

Yankee candle scent: what

7:

Perfume: no

6:

Flower: any that can go in my hair like a hipster

5:

Color: Purple

4:

Talk show host: John Oliver

3:

Comedian: Louis C.K.

2:

Dog breed: Shiba Inu

1:

Did you answer all these truthfully? maybe i dont know myself

Fuck you anon you cant stop me im dedicated as heck and butts fight me.

:Update: I went and updated these cause my internet came back!

[askdurianrider]

YO response to bonnyrebeccas tumblr about rt4 & your advice??

1. Im glad that Bonny answers some questions but it doesnt look like her energy is that good because she only answers a handful of questions per week, uploads every now and then and just seems to sit around watching repeats of The Lion King. When she was carbing up she was traveling around, doing more content, got her book out and was HEAPS fitter than she is today. 

2. I base my advice on results. Im performance focused. If someone claims they feel better or worse then we look at what performances they did on certain diets/mindsets and then check them today or vice versa. I was talking to Bonny the other day about certain things. It was a long conversation but I didnt ask these questions. Maybe she can elaborate more? I know when I added in more daily fat over 100g that my legs felt really ‘blocked’ on the bike the next day and trying to hit 400w for 5 mins just felt impossible. I also felt more attraction to stimulants like caffeine etc. Like a daily attraction just to do everyday stuff that doesnt even require stimulants! xD

3. Bonny didnt give us any specific cal, carb or fat intakes so it is a bit confusing to the viewer what exactly is different? Was it more cals, more fat grams and less cals or eating at different times of the day and how are we measuring performance gains or losses? 

4. Ive been coaching friends on fitness since 1996. Started as a PT in the gym back in 1999. I worked in sports footwear and cycling industry for many years. FADS come and go and industry makes xyz claim BUT Ive learned to sniff out what real results are and what is just fake. Nike claiming their shoes are faster when we know they are being worn by doped athletes just is bullshit. Put those shoes on the average punter and there is zero objective performance increase lol.

5. Give me anyone and I will turn them into their fittest self. Tori is fitter now after just a few months of playing around on the bike than when she was at the sports institute for rowing and guided by professional state coaches. Granted she lives with me so I can monitor her biological read out every hour of the day and adjust diet and training accordingly but you get the picture - Im not bound by institution or government ‘guidelines’. I have freedom to experiment and show people the results. Some people like to pretend that Im ‘fixed and bound’ to my own guide lines but Im not. Ive eaten so much vegan junk food on camera, experimented with steroids etc and poured 300g of sugar onto a 500g packet of kellogs sustain cereal to show people ‘how it affected my blood values in a negative way’ (it didnt and I had one of the strongest rides of my life the next day)

6. I know so many crew who claim to eat one way but eat another way because they are scared of losing customers. I know so many people who still have raging eating disorders and they hide it under ‘allergies’ etc. (Just to be clear Im NOT saying FL or Bonny had ED, in my honest opinion they don’t and living with FL I can honestly say she does eat a lot but when snacking on fatty stuff, she will limit it heavily but try a small amount).

7. Many people say some of the skinny girls on youtube etc have ED and whilst that may be true for some, it isnt true for the people that I promote. As soon as I hear wind of someone starving, Im all over them and making sure Im not promoting their bad example. Fuck man, life is hard enough without trying to get thru the day glucose exhausted and undercarbed AF.

8. I could get Bonny so fucking fit and toned. Bonny hasnt coached anyone to incredible results. I mean she could if she used my program and so could FL but neither girls do coaching and if they do, they are only parroting my template and Im not going to sue them for that haha.  Im SO happy people spreading the high carb vegan word man! I mean Bonny going to give a refund for all those people who bought her high carb book? Stephanie? Freelee? Don’t think so bro. 

9. People change, beliefs change. Human physiology laws dont though. Give me ANYONE and I can have them earning good money on social media, have them the fittest they have ever been (drug free) and have them more relaxed and confident about themselves and life than they ever thought was possible. Also they will NEVER have to worry about getting fat ever again! 

10. To be objective critiques people need to read my 2 ebooks. Some say I recommend this or that but what I rate is in text and in my 2 ebooks. I recommend a LIFESTYLE based on quality sweet fruit IF you can get it. Supplement those cals each day with refined sugars and processed starches like rice, wheat, quinoa, corn, potatoes, yams etc. I say processed because when you cook something is is NOT a whole food! A whole food is an apple. You can drink more apples than you can eat a raw one. You can eat more cooked rice than raw rice. You can eat an INSANE amount of yams, sweet potatoes, corn if it is cooked vs raw aka you will GET WAY MORE CARBS SO YOU CAN GET LIFE FUCKING DONE! (Where is the discussion about training? Like why are people driving cars in Sydney when it is faster to just ride down the road vs store body fat, pollute the earth by sitting in a car that kill children, pets and wildlife every day?)

For those obsessed with just diet diet diet the TRUE WHOLE food DIEt is raw fruit. Just pick up a peach and eat it. That is a whole food!. (Whole food is NOT cooked food lol!)

A diet high in processed foods is essentially what I recommend.

Cooked starches aka rice of any kind, pasta.

Fruit smoothies.

Refined sugars aka dried fruit, cane sugar, fructose syrup, rice cakes etc.

Processed fats like tofu, oil, nut butters etc are good if you are getting too skinny or you have no heart disease risk. I eat them when Im looking to gain a bit of fat or not drop weight too fast because Im riding my bike more than sitting my undercarbed ass in a car. #irony

Bottom line I DONT take performance advice from peeps that can’t even post a tumblr question once a day or upload a basic youtube video once a day yet their profession is social media. 

I DONT take performance advice from peeps that wouldnt put a fat person in their instagram shot yet would get dropped by a fat person up a hill on a bike.

People can critique my lifestyle advice (I dont do diets man, it is LIFESTYLE I teach) but fuck, at least so us some epic shit or epic transformations of people you have coached. Im running a 6 week festival this year in Thailand essentially on my own. You think Im gonna do that eating a mouse sized acai bowl I just paid $40 for from some hipster cafe in Bondi where you could drop 100$ on the ground and nobody would notice because they are too busy looking at their phones, their reflections in the window or at other hipsters hair cuts and analyzing the bondi sands tans. 😂

To be continued….

[trendingnewsb]

Porns Sarah Palin Opens Up About Her Triumphant Return

She is one of the most popular porn stars in the worlda woman even more famous than many of the superstar athletes she dates.

Lisa Ann said goodbye to the adult entertainment industry several years ago, launching a successful career as the host of a fantasy sports program on SiriusXM. Even after she left, Ann continued to be one of the most-searched porn stars in the world.

Though most famous for her portrayal of former politician Sarah Palin in six XXX films, including the infamous Whos Nailin Paylin?, Ann is also well known for the company she keepsnamely, hot young athletes. Known for her tight lips, Ann rarely discusses her athlete hookups, but estimates to have had hundreds of professional athletes throughout her illustrious career. She prefers sleeping with NBA players, and isnt shy about dropping hintsor putting athletes on blast when they wont stop begging, like Canucks defenseman Michael Del Zotto.

And now, at 45, shes making her triumphant return to porn.

Most adult stars who succeed outside of the business dont come back, which makes Lisa Anns return to porn all the more intriguing. Reentering an industry known to prey on the young at middle age requires a confidence most 20-somethings lack. But Ann isnt just returning to pornshe wants to change it. By pushing back against the patriarchy and redefining what it means to be in the adult community, Anns determined to help other performers find success.

When I call Lisa Ann, its late afternoon. The phone rings and I leave a voicemail. Ten minutes later she calls back, explaining how the cable guy had been running late and just left. Unfortunately, the installation didnt go as planned and Ann would have to wait to be properly serviced. It sounded just like a classic porn scenario.

When I considered coming back to porn I realized that being committed to something I love without counting the dollar has made me a better person.

Lisa Ann

Hey, at least he wasnt creepy. Thats my biggest fear, is that someones going to be in my house and creepy, says Ann. I had an air conditioner installer take pictures of the inside of my house and then post them on social media. I was mortified. I stayed in my office while he did his job, I thought I was being trusting, and here he was taking pictures of my pictures with other people.

If the A/C installer had kept the pics to himself, Ann may have never known, but he blasted them on social media and linked her in his mentions. He wrote, I was just at the real Lisa Anns house, look. And there was a selfie of the guy next to my car and I was like, Oh my god, he was in my underground parking with my car!

Not that Anns complaining too much these days. If anything, shes surprisingly appreciative for someone whos achieved the kind of crossover success she has. We have so much freedom [in the adult industry]we choose when we work, we choose this unique lifestyle, and we are getting compensated more than other people working a lot harder than us. Theres a lot to be excited about.

And to the bitter, jaded performers in the industry, Ann offers the following advice: Get a regular job for ninety days, stick to the schedule youre given, only taking a lunch break when its scheduled. Then see how you feel about porn after ninety days at a regular job.

Though Ann now has a regular job as well, she doesnt think of it so much as work due to her passion for sports radio. Im an employee and I have a boss but I love what I do, she says. I want sports twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. Im never late and Ive never canceled a show. I love being responsible and Im so grateful for it because I never knew Id have a gig like this.

Returning to porn was as much a practical, financial decision for Ann as it was an opportunity to give back. Shes made it very clear that getting back into the adult entertainment industry will not impact her career in sports radio. People dont do sports radio for the money. Its something you do because you love it. When I considered coming back to porn I realized that being committed to something I love without counting the dollar has made me a better person. I am going to be continuing on with my two shows on Sirius, and that way I dont get lost in the sauce, in the gossip, and the drama of the business.

Ann did not initially plan to return to the industry, but began toying with the idea after being approached by several adult companies. One big company came to me and offered a decent amount of money to do some scenes. Im smarter now and thought, if someone is offering me this much money then obviously I must be worth more. These are the people that know the numbers. I read a book about making deals, and the first offer is normally a quarter of your worth, so you go up maybe 75 to 100 percent, then its negotiated back down and you meet in the middle around 50 percent. I was inspired by the idea but sat on it for 10 months. I wanted to be sure about wanting to come back.

Even after mulling it over for almost a year, Ann approached her comeback cautiously. Not knowing how shed feel about doing porn again, she wanted to test it out before going public. And she did. That alone is a powerful accomplishment. Then again, Ann has proven herself to be an expert secret-keeper. When I shot my first scene in December I told no one. I made everyone keep it off social media, and hired people who I knew could keep a secret. I honestly wanted to shoot it and hold on to it to see if I felt differently about myself afterwards.

Shes an experienced porn star who isnt sure how shell feel after doing a scene. While this may sound odd to some, when she explains how society essentially congratulated her for getting out of porn it begins to make sense. People have spoken to me almost like I was a better person because I wasnt in the adult business anymore, she says. They say things I know are meant to be a compliment but its an insult because what theyre saying is that they thought less of me at one time. I never felt better or different out of the business, but those conversations made me ask myself, how will I feel when I wake up after doing another scene?

A true entrepreneur, Ann sees value in todays porn market. Shes certain there is more money for performers to make in the adult business than ever before, which runs contrary to the popular belief that porns going broke. Im the first person to understand the reality of it. Sure, you cant just go to set, shoot scenes, and go home and expect to make the same amount of money you used to. The hustle is different, she explains. Now there are all these different avenues to make money. The moneys there and its tenfold, you just have to be on your game, you have to use your downtime wisely, get paid to text, get paid to post and do these things every day.

According to Ann, the money is there for producers and directors toospecially with how easy (and cheap) content is to produce these days. Its a no-brainer. Its so much easier to produce content now, you spend one day on set, come home upload your content, upload your model releases and in one day you have a fully-produced scene. Especially when you know what you need.

Taking a new approach, Ann wants to educate the new generation of performers, offering counsel and guidance for their careersincluding what lies beyond should they one day wish to shed their stage name. The saddest thing about this business is that all the success stories leave, she says. Anyone who gets their head up and feels great decides they no longer belong here, so its important that as a woman I bring that success back. I have an open-phone policy for anybody [in the industry]. Im teaching some of the other women how to use software so they can take one day a week away from social media. I think we should all detach one day a week for mental health.

Ann also wants to help fellow performers recognizeand capitalize ontheir true market value, which is something she believes agents are not incentivized to do. I want to help these women up their game at marketing, I want to empower them with knowledge and get them to understand they are a capital-building machine right now, says Ann. They can produce their own stuff at home on their cell phones and make money all day long. Agents want to to force them to go to set because agents only make money when the girls go to set. These women need to know they arent just a product; rather, they are young entrepreneurs, and they are now living in the Silicon Valley-era of porn.

Read more: https://www.thedailybeast.com/porns-sarah-palin-opens-up-about-her-triumphant-return

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