#also that's when i watched nhie as well

[begaana]

oh there used to be this australian show on netflix called unlisted i remember fragments of it twas fine

[mynonclicheblog]

One final Never Have I Ever love triangle thematic analysis

I've said this in one of my posts before, but the narrative is always going to favor what is best for Devi. A lot of what makes this show so juicy to dive into is because so much of its meaning is rooted in symbolism and higher concepts, not just the individual interactions you're looking at onscreen!

I think that's what doesn't work for some (not all) pro-Dxton anti-Ben folks. They see Paxton being respectful and kind to Devi, they see that he's the attractive object of her desire from day 1, and they see that the two of them genuinely do help each other in certain ways. But when these same people look at Benvi, they only see Ben making obnoxious comments to Devi (+ others), they see childish behavior and mistakes being made, and they see them frequently butting heads due to their shared competitive nature.

And honestly? I get it. These conclusions are easy to come to when you're looking at the surface, but they don't take into account the full story that's being told.

Let's get into it. 😎👇

So I mentioned earlier the idea of what is best for Devi. Not what is best for any regular person out there -- what is best for Devi Vishwakumar! Our girl expresses in no uncertain terms that she enjoys her hypercompetitive rivalry-turned-bond with Ben ("Ben's smart and we talk- mostly argue- for hours!" // "I don't want to break up with Ben. He really pushes me.") The fact that they fight and compete is not a detriment to their compatibility, it is actually the thing that makes him most desirable in her mind. She would not have wanted to be with him in the first place if this were not true. Their sharp-tongued communication style may not be the standard picture of a 'healthy' relationship for most people, but, well. Devi and Ben are far from most people.

Devi is an incredibly emotional, dynamic person who's always searching for another high. The competitive nature of her relationship with Ben is enough to satisfy her itch for novelty/excitement (her differences with Paxton don't hit this box), yet Ben's presence also provides a comforting long-term consistency in her life. He's seen the very best and the very worst of her and he always comes back. He frequently brings Devi back to herself, too, when she loses sight of what matters (friendships, family, sense of self, her goals, etc).

Then there's the dream vs. reality dichotomy that very much applies to this love triangle. Simple as it may be, it's accurate. I believe it was built that way on purpose because of how well it reflects Devi's relationships to Mohan and Nalini, which is the beating heart of what NHIE is all about. One (Mo/Pax) is more outwardly palatable than the other and provides an easygoing, self-soothing escapism that she needs in order to work through her grief. This person represents youth and the rose-colored past; Devi's tendency to idealize and indulge. The other person (Nal/Ben) is sharper around the edges, a bit harder to swallow, but pushes Devi to do better and supplies the support she needs. This person represents Devi's grounded reality; her time in the present and the woman she is growing into.

They are both important pieces of Devi's journey, but the themes of past vs. present speak for themselves. The past is something we keep in our heart; in this case, it's someone who has impacted us and we'll always carry with us -- but the ultimate goal is to move forward from that. The central relationship of Never Have I Ever is that of Devi & Nalini as they heal and grow together. In terms of Devi's romantic life (which is what this analysis is about), her relationship with Ben is the one that more closely shadows the series arc between her & Nalini.

I'd like to address some things by the individual season now. One of my observations watching s1 for the first time was that Paxton was usually aligned with bad things in Devi's life, whereas Ben was aligned with the good. ie, Paxton was the root cause of Devi's falling out with Elfab and Nalini // Ben is the one who repaired those relationships. These things aren't Paxton's fault, nor do I place any blame on him. They're just subtle narrative choices that send up unspoken flags saying, hey look, this isn't the right person for her. This theme remained in s1 for the most part, but given that it was NHIE's debut season, it planted several seeds for me about who the boys were for Devi and how they fit into her world.

Season 2 does a lot to sort out the difference in what Devi thinks she wants (Paxton) and what her heart truly wants (Ben). Yes, I'm going there, too: head vs heart. Devi's underlying preference for Ben > Paxton should be easy to spot as early as 2x01 -- if only for the fact that Devi finally bagged the hot guy of her dreams, yet, choosing to be with him isn't easy for her. In fact, as both Devi and Eleanor confirm later, she wanted to choose Ben in the first place. Like... that's crazy when you think about it!!! Despite all the pieces falling into place for her and Paxton, and against her friends' shallow advice, she decides that she won't let go of Ben. Instead, she makes the misguided decision to date both. This isn't the kind of mistake she'll ever make again. It isn't Devi acting out because of Ben -- it signals a profound attachment to him when, all things considered, picking Paxton should have been a no brainer. That revealed everything I needed to know in order to understand that being with Paxton wasn't what she wanted in her heart of hearts.

Then, of course, 3x10 brings that all home with the stomach knots comparison. It tells us that since Devi and Paxton have moved into a place of friendship, with him no longer on a pedestal, those romantic feelings (particularly on her part) have dissipated. As a bonus, Devi even explicitly states that Paxton was a dream! Ben, however -- her flawed reality -- is the one who still gives her butterflies. This is the result of Devi's slow awakening to her true inner self, the Devi who values realness and authenticity and loving through imperfection. It's a step closer to the complete acceptance of herself. (Notice as well that right after this point, it becomes more undeniable than ever that Ben is who she wants to be with.)

As long as Paxton was a romantic possibility for Devi, their relationship was tied to her feelings of insecurity and inferiority. Again this is not Paxton's fault -- he assures her of the opposite all the time -- but this is Devi's story, and we are shown over and over that Devi fears true vulnerability with Paxton (both sexually and emotionally). Compare this to the way she has always felt confident, seen, driven, and unabashedly herself in her relationship with Ben, even when they were enemies. At a glance Devi may appear to act more immature in Ben's orbit, but the truth is that she grows with him more than anyone else (besides Nalini) thanks to Ben's penchant for encouraging accountability and showing her that actions can have consequences.

Anyway, TLDR version:

Paxton = Devi's youth, Mohan, grief, distraction, the past, idealism, and the head (constructed ideas).

Ben = Devi's future, Nalini, healing, confrontation, the present, reality, and the heart (authentic truths).

Never Have I Ever's romantic story structure rests on the premise of these symbolic definitions. They are gospel, and while the characters will grow and change and become better versions of themselves, they will do so within the lines that are already drawn. The lines exist for a reason -- they are a narrative tool! These characters cannot and should not 'grow out' of their roles because those roles are their identities within the show's framework. Character development isn't getting wasted, because the characters are exactly who they are meant to be right through to the end. They are symbols. If that's not your cup of tea then so be it! But there's nothing wrong with this writing style. In fact it's one of my personal favorites because everything is so neatly defined, yet fascinating to read into 🥰

The imperfect Ben had to be Devi's true love because her love interests are, in a way, reflections of herself. By no fault of his own, Devi always felt the need to be "perfect" for Paxton because that's how she viewed him; a false paragon of everything she wanted to be. That is the point of their story together. Her acceptance of the deep love she has for Ben (and Nalini!), despite his sometimes off-putting demeanor, is aligned with Devi's acceptance of her own imperfections -- that she is hot-headed, she can be self-absorbed, she makes mistakes -- but that she is also brilliant and driven and caring and radiant, and she is equally worthy of receiving the love that she has to offer others.

Narratively speaking, it was never truly a competition.

[offbrandkyoya]

50 hopefully

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You’re feeling a bit better than yesterday but a part of you is still upset. You woke up this morning feeling good but it washes away when you recall last nights events. Sitting up, you grabbed your phone from the nightstand, and Scaramouche never texted you once. Your breath shakes and you get up to start the day.

Currently, you are eating lunch with Thoma since it’s break. You’ve been spacing out but working on your art project distracted you. You ate and stared at the table. Thoma is concerned for you and he decides to ask, “What’s wrong?” You look up at him and the guilt surfaces. “Uh, well…” You put your fork down and hold your hands. “Scaramouche and I got into a fight.” Thoma gains a shocked expression. “Oh no. I’m sorry, yn.” You smile forcibly. “It’s okay.”

Then, you frown again. “Thoma, I have to tell you something.” He tilts his head a little. “What is it?” You look around before leaning towards him and whispered, “I know.” He blinks. “Know what?” You look around again. “Not here.” You say and get up, gathering your things and throwing your trash away. Thoma follows you and throws away his stuff too. You lead him to the lounge and sit on the couch. He sits next to you still confused.

“Thoma, I know about you and Diluc.” Suddenly, his face went white. He shook and picked on his skin as he chuckled awkwardly. “H-How did-How did you find out?” You took out your phone and show him the message you received. He grew more and more anxious as he read the article, word for word. Thoma looks away and you take it as a sign that he doesn’t want to read it anymore.

Putting your phone away, you place a hand on top of his, mostly to stop him from hurting his skin. “I wont tell Diluc, I promise.” Thoma nods. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me. I’m letting you know because I don’t want to keep it a secret from you.” You caressed his hand. “You’re a good guy so I’ll do whatever you want me to do with this information.” Thoma sighs and thinks for a moment. He looks at you and asks, “Are you the only one who knows?” You shook your head. “Scaramouche knows but I doubt he’ll say anything.” ‘Hopefully.’

Thoma nods again. “It’s pretty sad. Our history.” You frown and give him a tight hug. “I’m sorry.” He hugs back and buries his face in your shoulder. “It’s okay.” He says, softly. You both pull away from each other. “Enough of that,” You say. “I want to show you how my projects going.” Thoma smiles. “I’m pretty excited.” He tells you. You get out your phone once more and show him a photo of your artwork. He gasps, “Woah, that’s so good!” You blushed. “Is it? You don’t think it’s too much?” He shakes his head. “Of course not. You’re very talented.”

You smile and look at the piece as well. “I’m sure Scaramouche agrees.” Those words made you gasp and turn to him. Thoma only smiled at you and you couldn’t help but look at your drawing again. The bell rings and Thoma stands up to leave. “Are you coming?” He asks since you didn’t move. “You go without me.” You say and he nods, leaving you on your own. You bit your bottom lip. Slowly, you opened Scaramouche’s contact and stared at the keyboard.

Your finger went to press a key but you stopped when you received a message.

- kny ep today and i sobbed

- can’t wait for next season 😁😁

- also hq returning soon kinda nervous

- I miss them 😞☹️

- I started watching nhie (only on s2 no spoilers pls even though Ik who she ends up w in the end lol)

🏷️ @sakiimeo @coquettemaiden @rmiyuki @kur44pika @theblueblub @jxxji0309 @dreamsofminnie @ohmyfinggod @redactedhimbo @kunisbeloved @akagism2 @sketcheeee @thefandomcrow @beriiov @thenightsflower @yukiipc @scaraapologist @scarletttcroww @samyayaya @crucnhice @monaypo1 @feiherp @myaaones @warcelia @hangecanweholdhands @yuminako @valiryyz @screechingxiaolover @tiddieshakeshownu @ilovechuuyaa @d4y-dr3am3r @dazaisfavgf @swivy123 @ganyusbrideee @sagegreenthinks @the-left-glove @wonderland-fan @kylexzz @kaoyamamegami @whycantscarabereal @rvoulte @eunchaeluvr @lxkeeeee @silvermah @baby-bread-in @yelleloww @magica-ren @itzblazekun @im-inlovewithy0u @featuredtofu

[rainparadefromhell]

How Never Have I Ever Uses Music to Hint at the Future

 I’ve always loved the way music tells a story, especially in movies and tv shows. These things usually go unnoticed unless you’re a college student trying to ignore homework on a Tuesday afternoon. I have been aware that NHIE has been whispering a secret story through its soundtrack for a while now but never had time to actually compile it into one monster of a post. So I’m doing it now!

This is where I try to convince you that the show has been hinting at Devi ending up with Ben all the way since season one. There are over 100 songs in the official soundtrack and of course, I can’t go through them all so I’ll just stick with the most important moments from all three seasons and lyrics that I think encapsulate the core message of the songs.

 SEASON 1

 The Pilot – Introductions

Paxton’s intro song (Dancing On My Own – Robyn) makes a lot of sense for both characters. It talks about trying hard to get someone’s attention and failing at it. It is a song with a dramatic, pulsating beat that plays over Paxton’s big entrance into Devi’s class.

 I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, oh

I'm right over here, why can't you see me? Oh

I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the girl you're taking home, ooh

I keep dancing on my own (I keep dancing on my own)

 Ben is introduced with a softer melody (Rubia – Juan Wauters). It is in Spanish, a language I don’t speak as well so I won’t try to translate it but I will leave you with this Pitchfork review of it written by Steven Arroyo :

“Rubia” still succeeds wonderfully on these terms, a longing love letter to someone with a memorable nose in a far-away country…

 Te guardo un lugar en mi corazon

No quiero irme, chequeo hora son

Me iré pensando que

Muy pronto contigo yo estaré

 There is an important moment near the end of the episode when Devi goes to talk to Paxton (and asks him to have sex with her) in which Playing Games by Anna of the North plays.

 I've been playing games with your heart

Left you thinking in the dark

Just to make you feel unsure

Then I know you want me more

 This whole song is very interesting to me. The singer seems to describe a situation in which she has the upper hand in a relationship.

I’ve been playing games with your heart, so I know I’ve made my mark is a lyric I think perfectly shows Devi’s desire to enter a relationship. It is not because she actually likes Paxton. In fact, she doesn’t even know him yet. I think it tells of Devi’s reasons to have a boyfriend – to make a mark not just on him but the school, and her peers as well. She wants to stop being “invisible” as to somehow regain some power over her situation in s1 (the death of Mohan) as well as distract herself from it.

 Episode 2

The song Dancing on The Limit (by Prizes) plays as Devi dreams of Paxton coming into her room to have sex with her. It is the first “love song” of Devi and Paxton which I find genius since it doesn’t actually depict reality.

I'm never gonna quit it

Back in love within a minute

We're dancing on the limit

But I love the way you're making me move

 It is a fantasy, something Devi feels when she imagines what would be like to be Paxton’s girlfriend.

 Episode 6

In Ben’s episode we get so much more insight into who he is, and not just that shell of an obnoxious overachiever he built for himself. We also get insight into his feelings for Devi when he is having dinner with the Vishwakumars where after choosing not to “nuke her back”, he actually has a fun time with her family as the song (Call Me by Sarah Rebecca) in the background goes :

 Call me angel, I could save you

I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you

 At the very end of the episode when Devi Venmos Ben so that he never has to “accept food from a pedo again” another love song can be heard (Lost – Boy Harsher).

 I’m the one that holds you

In the middle of the night

 I'm the one that wants you

Forever til we die

 Episode 7

In this episode Devi and Paxton kiss for the first time to Fire For You by the Cannons which at first seems like a really sensual song… until you actually read the lyrics.

 I could've died for you

How could you not know?

I was alive with you

But you brought in the cold

Was I being lied to? Wish I never met you

Started to regret you

  Episode 10

 Boys Like You -  Kids at Midnight

We’ve reached my favorite NHIE song. I love the synths. I love the 80s vibe. I love everything about it (No wonder why that Malibu kiss got an MTV nomination).

Certainly the most interesting thing about this song playing during this scene is right as the camera lowers on Devi’s phone, we cut to Paxton leaving a voicemail with these lyrics in the background :

 She said, "Boys like that should be in second place”

Now do with that what you will but this is the most intentionally placed lyric in season 1, in my opinion.

 I know it hurts right now, one day you'll realise

There's no need to hide yourself from the world

All my life I've been hiding myself

Just waiting for a boy like you

SEASON 2

 Episode 8

In the scene we see Devi apologize to Ben about the cheating when the song Up All Night by The Undercover Dream Lovers starts playing. The song is seemingly about second chances and not letting someone go. I thought the theme of driving was interesting considering Malibu.

 Caught up on the freeway

You test my patience all the time

Find another exit, ooh

Blocking you from mine

 Episode 9

Heat Waves – Glass Animals

 During Paxton and Devi’s kiss Heat Waves plays and I have to admit the song as well as the scene are amazing. However, I’ve seen this song misunderstood by Daxton fans so much, probably due to the scene trending (mostly on TikTok where people enjoy quick content without much context).

The writer of the song, David Bayley says this about what it means, mentioning another song called Your Love : “They're both definitely two of the songs that are about relationships and sort of knowing that they're doomed,"

Bayley uses the term Heat Wave to represent an illusion of a highway mirage (the air that rises off asphalt on extremely hot days making it seem like the road is wet).

So the love that the writer describes is just like the heat waves – an illusion.

 Now I gotta let you go

You'll be better off in someone new

I don't wanna be alone

You know it hurts me too

You look so broken when you cry

One more and then I say goodbye

 Episode 10

GOLDEN – Running ; Ben comes into the girls bathroom to try and make Devi feel better after she is rejected by Paxton. As he is saying “When are you gonna to realize that that dick doesn’t deserve you” the lyrics playing are :

But I get these feelings

That I can't explain

It’s in my veins

being the underdog all the time

 Hello Pongo – Summer Love

Another love song that plays when Ben and Devi see each other at the dance.

I've been lookin,

for you my summer love

forever summer love

Sam Smith – Love Goes

This song is – do you wanna guess? Not a love song. It is a sad one.

I hope you understand that I have to send you away

You may not understand, but I know that you will one day

You're broken, I know this

And if you knew it, you would love me a whole different way

But that's how love goes, goes

I also think it’s funny how just as Devi and Paxton are about to slow dance the DJ plays a different, more upbeat song which tells us they aren’t really that compatible with each other. They just never manage to catch that love song!

 I wonder if season 4 brings us a Ben and Devi slow dance…

SEASON 3

Episode 1

 Josha Daniel – Dream of You ; We finally get something close to a love song for Daxton in the first scene of season 3 even though it it pretty vague and repetitive.

 We are never gonna waste our time again

I can't sleep when i dream of you

I can't sleep when i dream of you

 Ilo Ilo – Clementine ; Devi and Paxton almost have sex

Clementine

Trying to erase you from my spotless mind

Hit fast-forward but I'm stuck in rewind

 Episode 3

Afternoon Bike Ride – Before The Fall ; Devi tells Nalini she and Paxton broke up

After an autumn of ends lеd to silence

Winters cloak covered the tracks of the tyrants

Spring couldn't bring on the promise of June

With no voice to sing and nothing to bloom

I found the mention of June interesting even if it wasn’t intentional because it almost seems like an answer to Heat waves (Sometimes, all I think about is you, Late nights in the middle of June).

Mel Blue – Finding You; Ben tells Fabiola Devi broke his heart

I lost you love

You lost you too

I lost myself

I’m finding you

Episode 5

Carla Morrison – Eres tú ; Ben and Devi say goodbye to each other after their bet at the coffeehouse

(I found a translation for this one)

Today I woke up wanting to kiss you

I have a thirst to caress you

Entangle myself with you and not let you go

You're so intoxicating

It's you

 Episode 10

“Because I’ll miss you. A lot.”

“Wait. There’s the stomach knots.”

Jaguar Sun – Car Keys

Oh, how you've grown

Look back now

And move on

Don't worry, about a thing

Just grab those car keys

And drive into the rain

Another song involving cars, driving… I’m starting to think all of this makes sense! Also I love how the song mentions growth because Devi did grow so much in season 3.

 Prinze George – Take off

 Saw you in the living room

You were wild with light and I wanted you

Tried to do the woman thing

I was eager, young and abandoning

I would force you to love me

I would force you to stay

I would force you to love me

I would stand in your way

And you can't take off without me now

After Boys Like You this has to be my favorite NHIE song. It also has an 80s vibe to it and the two songs feel very much connected in my mind. The lyrics talk about standing in a lover’s way. Preventing them from leaving you and closing that chapter of their life.

I am still in your way

This lyric that appears later in the song shows that after everything that happened to them in season 4, they are still in each other’s way. They can’t forget about each other even after actively pursuing other people.

 After analyzing so many songs, I really have to give credit to the show. Most of these were chosen so carefully to fit certain moments. You can really tell the show was made with a lot of intention and love, at least soundtrack wise.

 As far as proving who the main couple (endgame couple, whatever you wanna call it) in season 4 is, to me that is pretty obvious even without the support of the soundtrack. I’m very curious about the songs we’ll get to hear in the new season and I also wonder if we will hear some old ones again.

Let me know what you think!

[basiltonpitch]

Okay, re: your last post. I think what bugs me the most about people saying this season was “bad” or “not worth watching” simply because their ship didn’t get “endgame”. Is that it has never been what the show was about!! Like sure they use the “love triangle” for marketing but the true heart of the show is Nalini and Devi’s relationship. When I first started watching the show I was skeptical because all I had seen was the romantic aspect but the show drew me in with Devi’s relationship with her mom. (What can I say she is about girls with complicated relationships with their moms always get me). All the ever most rememberable scenes to me are ones that either feature Devi and Nalini or Devi and Dr. Ryan.

I forgot to mention this is my post yesterday but one of my favorite scene from season one is when Nalini goes and talks to Dr. Ryan. When she lets her know just how scared she is for Devi and how much she herself is struggling. That whole scene is so underrated.

Anyways, your last post was spot on and I wish more people appreciated the beauty that is the vishwakumar women’s relationships.

sorry i'm so late answering this but yes!!! this!!!! all of this!!!!! like...the romance has never been the central theme of nhie. devi's grief has. devi's relationship with nalini has. devi and nalini's combined grief, the way they heal together, the way they hurt together, the way they hurt each other because they're both in this immense pain....that's always been the cornerstone of the show. devi, then nalini. obviously i'm pleased with the endgame, more than pleased actually, but that was something i saw coming from a mile away. they made it obvious from the get-go and it just kept getting clearer and clearer each season. but devi and nalini? the ways they hurt each other and healed each other? none of that was predictable, and even if it was, it just...holds so much more emotional weight than any of the other relationships in the show. ben and devi saying "i love you" for the first time didn't make me sob my eyes out and clutch my chest and ache for my own mother.

but you know what did?

1x10: "i can't believe i said i wish you were dead. i didn't mean it." "no, no, don't apologize. sometimes i also wish i was the one who had died. i know you think that it was your father who was the only one who cared about you, but that's not true. i love you. you're my only child. you're my whole family."

2x09: "what if i forget what dad sounds like?" "you'll never forget that, kutti. your father will always be a part of you. but if you need a little help remembering, i might have something."

3x09 "what if, um...what if nobody ever loves me because i'm always too much?" "oh, devi. listen to me. you're never too much, and you're always enough. and one day, you will find someone who loves you exactly as you are, just like i do."

3x10 "i just... i need one more year with you. we don't know what's gonna happen. okay? look at dad. i just...i need more time with you. is that okay?" "yeah. it's okay, kanna."

4x10 i don't know how to pack." "well, let's just do it together then." "i don't think i can go tomorrow. you were right, i can't do anything without you." "yes, you can. you just don't have to do it right now."

there are definitely more that i'm missing but those...those are the scenes that wreck me. those are the scenes that have left me literally bawling and having to pause the show because i'm crying so hard that i can't see a damn thing. those scenes are the heart of the show. like, i'm sorry, but there are no dxtn scenes, no benvi scenes that come even close to those.

nalini and devi are at the heart of the show. they always have been. i just wish more people could see that.

[catty-words]

anyway, the show is so funny for making 3.07 and 3.08 sister episodes wherein ben and paxton have to watch devi/des co-opt storylines that would traditionally belong to them - academic competition and being the thing in devi’s life that outshines her grief, respectively.

in 3.07, along with des demonstrating ben’s affinity for being cutthroat in his academic pursuits, he turns up ben’s condescension to 11, all the while dressing up these ben-borrowed traits in some patented paxton so-cal chill. and the particular way his paxton-chill interacts with his ben-superiority keeps des from meeting devi on a level, either in terms of disposition or intellectual respect.

naturally, the casually supposed superiority frustrates devi. rather than trusting herself to think on her feet - which ben has a demonstrated history of inspiring her to do (see: the seawall corporation argument she pulled out of her ass and “i really have to thank you, you keep my devi on her toes.”) - devi essentially gives up by resorting to cheating. which is not to say that it’s des’ fault devi cheated - it’s very much not, she made her bad choice - but rather, it’s telling that his treatment of their rivalry led her to pursue disingenuous means of winning. the end result is that they’re not actually engaging with each other.

when devi and ben compete, on the other hand, there’s a sense of equals going toe-to-toe, only heightened by the full-on pipsqueak energy they’ll both start serving the second they lose the upper hand. more to the point, though, it’s not actually about the competition in and of itself where devi and ben are concerned. after all, their canon academic competitions are hardly more mature or productive than the debate tournament ends up being - think of the beaker smash and viva wwiii! no, it’s specifically the way they’ve developed their rapport in the fires of that competition and therefore have a well-honed ability to call out the other’s bullshit that’s important.

in the closing scene of 3.07, devi confesses her crime to des, and he calls upon his paxton-chill to let it go with ease. which is nice and everything - devi did a well enough job of holding herself accountable by telling des she cheated in the first place - but it still stands in sharp contrast to the dynamic upon which devi and ben’s intimacy is built.

in 3.08, des switches gears to become the paxton analogue as the object of devi’s burning desire.

now, if you’ve been following along with my nhie brainrot for any length of time, you know i go hard for the layers of complexity in devi and paxton’s dynamic. he’s the symbol of normalcy she craves and getting with him is the goal she’s set to prove to herself and her peers that she, too, is totally normal. when she finally does enter a relationship with him, it all at once proves her worth as datable and turns out to be more alienating than ever.

so, by merit of being the next person devi dates, des inherits the runoff of that incredibly complicated dynamic. he is also escapism from herself, though this time devi’s not trying to get out of dealing with her grief so much as she’s simply relieved that she doesn’t feel the shadow of her reaction to that grief hanging over the entire relationship (x, x). the result is that she actually gets to experience the comforting normalcy of low-stakes high school romance and lust at the same time she handles her grief head-on and with a heretofore unseen emotional intelligence.

the thing is, this all happens almost incidentally to des’ presence in the episode. his paxton-like loyalty to his shitty friend keeps him from fully engaging with devi’s horniness, and his ben-like inferiority complex where paxton’s concerned keeps him from engaging with devi’s grief.

but you know who does acknowledge devi’s sexy efforts and emotional turmoil in one loaded scene? paxton hall-yoshida.

with all that laid out, it’s clear that these episodes have two things to say about des’ place in devi’s journey. firstly, of course, is the importance of their lack of history, which affords devi a freedom from her established identity as nerd and the space to explore which parts of her high school life are important to her, what she’ll carry with her when she leaves sohs behind in just over a year. 

the more interesting part, in my opinion, is the way des is sold to us as an amalgamation of everything we already know devi finds attractive: smart, dreamy, driven, and effortlessly cool. he’s supposedly the best of both worlds and, therefore, the ideal partner for devi.

in actuality, the way his ben-like and paxton-like attributes interact with each other in both episodes makes him a worse partner. possessive without being supportive, condescension dressed up like wit. though a combination of ben and paxton sounds nice on paper, the act of divorcing the two guys from their complexity and - yeah - their rich history with devi makes for a blander, shallower dynamic. the whole of both paxton and ben is greater than the sum of their parts.

at the end of 3.08, devi makes the choice to claim her identity as loser to des, and he affirms that the person he’s gotten to know is “super cool, beautiful.” their lack of history allows him to show her that she, too, is greater than the sum of her parts.

as such, this final scene marks an important turning point in the relationship. moving forward into 3.09, we get to see devi/des on its own merits, not as a blank slate for devi to sort her identity issues, nor as a ben/paxton dream combo. and we all know how that ends…

[oceanblueeyesoul]

Physical appearance: I have black hair, brown eyes, and darkish brown skin, and am (5’0)

Personally: I’m a very passionate and impulsive person who can come off as endearing. I’m insecure and would sometimes wonder whether people noticed and/or like me. I’m the youngest child.

My type for a perfect person: Someone warm, sweet, funny, hot, kind, and who has similar interests with me. Someone who’s outwardly affectionate as well.

Sexuality and Pronouns: No labels and she/her

MBTI Type: Somewhere in the extrovert spectrum

Moral Alignment: I see myself as Chaotic Good

Zodiac sign: Sagittarius

Enneagram Type: Never thought of it

Love Language: all 5 of them

Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff

Likes: Reading, singing, writing, relaxing, coffee, warmth, love, tv shows

Dislikes: People telling me what to do, my phone dying, homework, the antics of teen boys, getting hurt, etc.

Hi there Poorni, I really hope you like this a lot!

That 90's Show Matchup

Your t90s soulmate is...

NIKKI GARCIA!!!

The two of you would be reading books together and enjoy drinking coffee in the kitchen table together.

She would definitely watch some TV shows with you on the couch and just enjoy each other's company a lot.

She will do anything for you especially removing yourself from the antics of a teenage boys a lot so that you don't get hurt by them a lot.

Gemini x Sagittarius soulmates!

Lawful Neutral x Chaotic Good lovebirds!

Slytherin x Hufflepuff sweethearts!

Never Have I Ever Matchup

Your NHIE soulmate is...

BEN GROSS!!!

He would do anything for you as well including studying together but he will make homework sounds so fun to you a lot.

The two of you would definitely be reading books together but also would definitely some writing pieces together and he likes to watch you write your drabbles in the ao3 website.

He would definitely tell you reassuring words to help you with your insecurities a lot actually because he knows that you get nervous when people don't notice you or like you a lot.

Virgo x Sagittarius lovebirds!

True Neutral x Chaotic Good sweethearts!

Ravenclaw x Hufflepuff soulmates!

[the-paris-of-people]

8,12, and 17 for the nhie ask game 💕

8. What is your most unpopular opinion?

Oh boy, I have a lot.

Honestly my most unpopular opinion right now is that I don't think it would make sense for Manish and Kamala to get married at the end of nhie s4, and also I would be 100% fine with them splitting. I love Manish and Kamala individually a lot, but I'm not particuarly attached to them as a couple, and maybe it's just me projecting onto the characters, but Kamala's hesitancy to get married anytime soon/valuing her independence and agency is a journey I love and have taken and would love if the show focused more on that in the last leg rather than her and Manish's relationship, and I don't care if that occurs with or without him. I wouldn't mind if she and Manish ended up together though, as long as it was conducive to Kamala's journey.

My second unpopular opinion is that I'm a liiiiiiiiiiittle excited to see Ben and Margot date? Don't get me wrong, I 100% would prefer if Ben and Devi dated the entire season 4 (I stg if they don't have them interact until the last couple episodes I will scream) but I would like Ben to have a Des type experience where he gains confidence and realizes he's not this dick he makes himself out to be. Also I'm toxic and I want jealous Devi. Okay?? Selfishly, I just want her pining. But only for 3-4 episodes then they need to get it together.

12. What season has been your favorite so far?

UGH DON'T MAKE ME CHOOSE!!! This was so hard because s1 had the most airtight plot and the experience of watching Devi as a protagonist was so special to to me, s2 was when I first started seeing the FULL POTENTIAL of Benvi and gave me some cxgf vibes, and s3 was when all the characters had the most amazing arcs, Nalini and Devi became closer, and we got that epic romcom finale so I'll have to choose s3. That was so hard though!

17. Anything you want to rant about? (Aka more unpopular opinions)

This is more fandom related, but I wish more people wrote adult Benvi! There are so many fics of them from when they were teens and younger and while I like that I would love more fics of them grown-up and happy! Also very few people can write Ben and Devi well, I feel like sometimes they're just general fics with their names in there and I wish there were more highly character specific fics.

Another unpopular opinion but I think Ben's episode in s3 was my least favorite s3 episode. I absolutely loved his s1 episode about his home life and I really liked the message of the s3 episode and his interactions with Devi and Paxton but I find Ben's internal monologue about pressure not as fun or interesting to watch as Devi's shenanigans. Honestly, now that I am writing it, I think it's bc the episode was about school that's why I didn't care as much LOL. I also am not the biggest fan of the redemption arc for his dad- like it annoys me that Ben needed that external validation to have the stress lifted off his shoulders when Howard has been a shitty parent. Not that it's not realistic but it was annoying.

I personally don't believe that Ben was in love with Devi or vice versa before that moment in the principal's office that piqued his interest in episode 2, just because I think love is a very deep emotion and I like the idea of them falling in love as they got to know each other than I like the idea of them being in love (whatever that means to you as a kid) and realizing it suddenly.

Not unpopular, but we need to have a discussion about how Devi has heart eyes tm jealousy tm love tm for Ben, and how the rest of the love interests serve to strengthen their relationship which I honestly kind of love. Essentially, there's not enough Devi loves Ben discussion on here so I need to see it. Going into my next point, Devi NEEDS to tell Ben how she feels. I need her to tell Ben when they're both finally single that she wants to be with him the last couple months they have of college, I need her to make a big dramatic love confession, I need her to explain her feelings and why she dated other people instead of him and how she wanted to date him. Like I need her leading the charge on all of this (and I'm 99% sure she will)

[aemke]

Hello! I like your blog, so I'm going to ask you questions. You can answer as many or as few as you like.

What is your favourite thing about Ben?

What is your favourite NHIE scene?

Have you read/watched Jaren's interviews?

Do you read fic? If yes, do you have a favourite?

Any songs you associate with Ben as a character?

Do you ship Benvi?

Do you want to see a picture of my cat?

Well hello!

Thanks for the questions; did my best to answer them below.

I would say my favorite thing about Ben is his wit. I love snark and sarcasm, especially when paired with intelligence, which our Ben has in spades. When you add to that the fact that Ben is genuinely a kind and faithful person (even though no one on the show has once returned that friendship to him in kind), I just love him to bits.

Favorite NHIE scenes? How long do you have? My fav is probably the exchange with Howard in 3x6 but since that gets mentioned so often I'll add a few less noted examples. I love in 1x10 when he tells Fab and Eleanor that friends don't take breaks. Its not like its the most well acted of his scenes or anything but I think it says a lot about who Ben is as a person (I also hate Fabiola- I find her boring and judgmental- so I like Ben putting her in her place). Another favorite is Ben and the pear. Jaren does such a great job of showing Ben's transition from 'this is stupid'' to 'I see why this matters' and its done in such a convincing and understated way. Also love Ben telling Devi they're not even; again we get a lot of insight into Ben and where his head and heart are at with limited screen time. And Trent walking down the hallway to ravage Eleanor-comedy gold.

I haven't seen many interviews, but I am very impressed by the one's I have seen. I love to hear actors talk about their craft and you can tell that he is truly an actor who puts care and thought into his performances. He would definitely excel in future projects and I hope we get an opportunity to see him take on new and more challenging roles. I know you and others have talked about his fearlessness and vulnerability as an actor and you can definitely see that that approach is indeed intentional in his interviews.

I love fanfic! I am new to the NHIE fic fandom but I have read a few works I've enjoyed recently. Your recent A Ghost in the Back of the Room is an instant classic of course! I love fics solely focused on Ben and they are few and far between as I know you realize. I've read others I've enjoyed but I honestly can't remember them right now. I typically don't like things too sappy or out of character so anytime an author gets the voices right I'm usually along for whatever ride they want to take me on. I'm also trying not to read too much because I can easily lose myself in it all day and forget to live my actual real life, lol.

I very much doubt this is a musical list that is likely to inspire anyone but I have an old fashion (and probably bad) taste in music so here you go. Simon and Garfield : I am a Rock (obviously...just listen to those lyrics!) The Police: So Lonely (are you sensing a theme? Perfect for 'The Loneliest Boy in the World' and I feel like the manic energy of The Police is perfect for Ben), And of course Johnny Cash: A Boy Named Sue (while I doubt Ben and Howard will come to fisticuffs, its a song about troubled relationships with fathers and how our struggles make our character which feels pretty spot on for Ben)

Yes in so much as Devi is what Ben wants and I want that for him. Truthfully I would be ecstatic with a world in which all the characters had the hots for Ben and fought for his affections!

My chonky 18 year old kitty just passed away recently leaving a giant hole in my heart so I would very much like to see a picture of your cat :)

[rainparadefromhell]

Hey! What media have you been consuming now that NHIE is over? Has anything else taken over your brain recently?

Hope you’re doing well!

Hi Cara!

I'm so glad to hear from you, I've been really busy and honestly a bit anxious recently (I'm starting my first ever job next week 😶‍🌫️).

To answer you, I haven't been really that obsessed with anything like I was/am with nhie but I have watched a few things.

My recent favorite is the show The Bear. It's really hard to explain what it is exactly, essentially it's a show about a guy trying to run a restaurant and make it an actual fancy place. Underneath it, there is a story about childhood trauma and anxiety. The main character is really relatable to me, as someone who experiences anxiety as well as depression and I really *loved* season 2 when everyone goes on a journey of personal growth. It is so good and it's just been nominated for a bunch of Emmys!

Another thing I've been watching is this teen drama/mystery thriller called Cruel Summer. It has 2 seasons and they both revolve around a crime and discovering who committed it. It's really good because it has great twists you don't expect so it's not predictable. Season 2 is airing right now and I'm really invested. It is also an anthology series so you can tune in just season 2 if you're interested.

I have also seen the first 3 episodes of season 2 of The Summer I Turned Pretty but I have to be honest and say that I'm kind of disappointed in season 2 as of now. I think nhie showcases grief a million times better (and I get it, tsitp is more of a teen drama than nhie) but I would still recommend season 1 as a cute summer watch.

Thank you for reaching out and hope you're doing amazing because you are lovely and deserve it so much!

[mellarkably]

🚨 NHIE SPOILERS BELOW 🚨

first of all. that was a crazy ass season. so much happened and i can barely keep up or remember. so while this probably won't be a coherent or well worded recap, yhat defintely won't go over everything that i just watched for the past six hours, it'll just be my thoughts for now.

personally, i really liked the kamala plot and her struggle in the workplace. it was probably one of my favorite parts of the season. i'm not sure if kamala will be ditching prashant for mr. kulkarni but if she does i wouldn't be shocked. considering how prashant played into the whole workplace problem. also rip steve lol who remembers him. homie got done dirty.

now speaking of devi. there were many things she did this season that were not at all good or rational. however, i do like the fact that they delved more into her grief, and overall she actually seemed to develop over the season which made me happy. there are aspects of her grieving process that kinda felt unanswered, but hey, it is what it is. for what it's worth, im happy with the amount of growth she had over ten episodes. i actually felt like giving devi a hug so many times towards the end. and maitreyi killed it as always.

regarding the new kids! malcolm, well, i honestly kinda have intense apathy towards him as a character. he was cool at the start, a dick at the end—so yeah, i feel like he served his purpose overall. i felt extremely bad for oliver the entire time. and aneesa! she was the coolest addition they could honestly have had to the team. she's fun, charming, and fits in very well. i felt extreme sympathy for her ed and im glad they put a hotline at the end of those episodes. she's a great girl.

i'm very glad they gave paxton more of a well fleshed out personality this season. he seemed much more personable overall. although i felt like his episode at times fell a bit flat or felt too preachy regarding the whole hot people can be smart too concept, it was overall a fantastic episode and gigi hadid was a great choice as narrator. also loved the little switch to ben's pov when andy steps in. that was funny. i also liked the fact that they went into his ethnicity!

regarding his romantic feelings for devi though. i feel like i can't understand? like does he like her? does he not? is he embarassed of her? is he not? i failed to understand where he was most of the time. the mixed signals, like. paxton. i like you, but huh? well, to be fair, the romance in devi's life this season was pretty much a rollercoaster ride anyways so. i do love paxton's obijan though. great guy. we didn't get enough of rebecca though!

out of the two besties, i honestly liked fab's story a lot more. it felt relatable, that whole feeling of not being able to fit in as a new sapphic. and i adore fab and eve. i'm glad they didnt make their relationship too cookie cutter.

eleanor's subplot was alright. again, it was really hard to kinda, if i put this blatantly, give a fuck about malcolm and whatever their relationship was. (loved tyler alveraz's performance though) but i liked her talking with her stepmom sharon. i wish they spent more time on that rather than malcolm but again, they don't have much time to waste.

i loved nalini's subplots. all of them. she was honestly one of my fav characters this season, as well as devi's grandma. we got to delve into the indian culture more too, so that was very cool. her relationship with dr. jackson was also nice for the short time they had with each other. i didn't expect them to breakup, i kinda just expected devi to learn to be okay with her mother moving on, but then again, i also agree that it felt a little fast. i loved the flashbacks with mohan too.

i feel like i wanna save ben and benvi for last because i have too much to say. it was an absolute rollercoaster ride to be a team ben while watching this season. i'm a bit dissapointed that we didn't get any individual plot regarding him, stuff that didn't have to do with girls, but i get why. he got that in s1, and it was paxton's turn to shine.

regarding the whole ben and aneesa thing; honestly, i think they're cute. i love aneesa and i love ben. i just want him to be happy. but it's clear he still has feelings for devi and he doesn't really know what he wants, which sucks for everyone involved. i think that he just assumed that devi liked paxton more than him, that he was her second choice (which honestly, considering the things that transpired, it's not very hard to see why he though that, and he was clearly hurt with her clear choice of paxton over him on multiple occassions) but oh well.

i feel like ben was a catalyst for a lot of the things devi needed to do. like apologize to aneesa, for example. and in that way, they still work well. i loved their banter, whenever we got it. i have hope for them in season 3 (if it happens), considering the way they ended it, but eh. aneesa is also a great girl, so it sucks that this is the direction we're going. but yeah. i am a bit bitter with the dreadf lack of benvi i kinda got this season, but their conversations and the way he helped push her development did make me feel a little better.

as for what team i'm on or whatever, i don't feel like i'm avidly on any team tbh. i'm still lowkey rooting for ben and devi. the reason why i'm not completely getting behind daxton is because i didn't really like what paxton did in episode 10, with the whole not wanting them to be public thing. the entire season felt like he was sending mixed signals. not that i'm saying hes a shitty guy or anything, but yeah. and the reason i'm not completely team ben is because he seems to be teetering between aneesa and devi, so yes, again with the mixed signals. kind of. but the reason i'm still rooting for ben is because i really liked the way they pushed each other, or majorly, he pushed her development, with asking her to apologize, etc. and although him getting together with anessa was not a win for me, a benvi, to relish, i think it helped devi learn to act a little more mature and less territorial.

if i'm being completely honest, i think that devi needed to be single at the end of this season, at least for now. i read the synopsis of episode 10 and was kinda hoping that she'd make that choice, that she'd choose herself, because what she needs isn't a boyfriend. what she needs is just to recover. and i honestly still don't feel like she completely got over her dad's death.

OVERALL THOUGH. this was a much better season than the first one. i feel like they finally got into their groove in terms of acting and comedy. (also trent is the funniest >>>) although i felt like this season was kinda like the first one but on steroids, which at most times was very anxiety inducing to watch, i did like the episodes and i was heavily entertained. go watch it!

i also really need a season 3 so—

[loveourfuture-c]

19-27 for salty asks!!!

19. What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

Ooooo this is a good one. How much people worship and adore the male love interests and shit on Devi (who is the main character btw). The amount of Devi hate disguised as “criticizing her actions” is abhorrent. The majority Daxtons treat Devi like some sort of self insert character for their high school fantasies and there is a too large group of benvis that treat Devi like an evil villain who hurt the poor sad boy. Devi is not toxic, selfish, manipulative, or any other horrible thing people want to call her. She is a CHILD who is grieving and working through her trauma. People in this fandom need to check their misogyny and racism.

20. What’s the purest ship in the fandom?

i have two one cannon and one not.

Fabiola x Eleanor

Nalini x Mohan

21. What are your thoughts on crack ships?

They are harmless and fun!

22. Popular Character you hate?

I don't really have any. Im not Paxton's biggest fan but i don't hate him.

23. Unpopular character you love?

i kind of like Mr. Shapiro. He is performative and bad at his job but he makes me laugh.

24. Would you recommend nhie to your friends?

yes!! and i totally have multiple times. Its fantastic and everyone should watch it.

25. How would you end nhie?

I would probably end it before Devi goes to college. Like senior year and have it end when she graduates. I would have her and Ben going to the same school. I would have her succeeding in therapy and having a good relationship with her mom. I would also have her and ben be together in a official established relationship. Also Nalini and Dr. Jackson getting married/ and or engaged. And then like a flash forward at the end with Devi and Ben graduating college and being happy together. This is in my perfect world.

26. Most shippable character?

Eleanor, I think she could fit with several people well. I personally think she fits best with Fabiola but that’s just me.

27. Least Shippable character.

Paxton, he’s kind of boring and I don’t really feel very connected to him as a love interest.

[basiltonpitch]

i was tagged by @thefabulousfab-3 !! <3

Favorite time of year:

early fall! like when it's still warm outside, but the leaves have juuust started changing

Comfort food:

oooooh ok so it changes like all the time really lol but like, the past few weeks it's been a pretty decent tie between mashed potatoes & panda express lol

Favorite dessert:

hmm i'm not really a big dessert person!! but if i had to choose i guess i'd say lemon bars maybe? or no bake cookies! (idk if they actually count as desserts or just sweets, but they're desserts in my heart)

Things you collect:

rocks!! well crystals really lol but i don't collect them for spiritual reasons, i just think they're pretty! i collect lighters too & little antique glass bottles, but i definitely have more rocks than anything lol

Favorite drink:

i have more than one lol: diet dr pepper, the rosa monster ultra, iced apple crisp oatmilk macchiato, iced coconut milk matcha latte with 2 pumps of sf vanilla syrup & 1 pump brown sugar syrup (it's SO GOOD, trust me), & lychee black tea 30% sweet with crystal boba (specifically from kung fu tea)

Favorite musician/band:

obviously taylor swift lol but other than her: fall out boy, waterparks, leanna firestone, & noah kahan!!!

Last song I listened to:

fuck about it by waterparks !!

Last movie I watched:

the curse of bridge hollow. it was very cheesy but overall i enjoyed it lol

Last series I watched:

a league of their own!

Currently watching:

doctor who & abbott elementary!!

Current obsession:

i mean, nhie forever and always, but other than that, definitely midnights, as well as the entire stick season album by noah kahan

Dream place to visit:

honestly really anywhere i guess??? i really like to travel but i don't have like, places set in stone that i want to go to, i just wanna go anywhere & everywhere. i think iceland would be pretty cool!!

Places I want to go back to:

nyc!!! i went last november and literally fell in love with it i want to go back SO BAD

Something you want:

a new tattoo!! i have so many ideas and i haven't gotten a new one in AGES. also to go to a waterparks concert someday lol.

Currently working on:

a post-s3 benvi fwb fic!! (as well as slowly chipping away at my own original fiction, but that's always going on in the background lol)

i'm tagging @rainparadefromhell & @the-paris-of-people !!

[catty-words]

Oh! The mustache thing and David. Okay, okay. It still feels kinda weird to say someone is racist over this, but yeah, now that you point it out I see it. I had a childhood friend who got in a foreign exchange student program for a year in high school and when she came back she told us how since the gringos couldnt say her name properly they just defaulted to calling her "Brazil" 😑

I feel a bit called out about twitter, even if its true and I'm only there cuz I'm an addict being held hostage. I've also curated my fandom experience, but I was really needing more info and saw stuff that bummed me out while researching 🥲🥲 I dont mind seeing people criticize characters cuz like we are all entitled to our opinion even if I disagree, but I guess it kinda shocked me still. I guess I forgot about how in some ship wars I participated in when I was 13 some people would call the other characters rapists and stuff after being away from typical fandom toxicity for so long lol.

About the tone shift: yeah I did, but it didnt feel "drastic", just different. In a bad way. Like one of the first metas I read talked about how Devi lacked autonomy in season two and I was like YES THAT WAS WHAT I WAS THINKING even thought not really I was just "wait why is this feeling a bit off... weird... let me play the next episode and just hope is merely a vibe" I dont hate season 2 as much as you seem to, however season 1 and 3 are indeed superior. Season 3 is my favorite out of the three because I really like how the characters matured. A favorite episode is probably 1x10, like the scene of Nalini with dr. Ryan moves me, then Ben driving cackles me up, then I back to being moved by them spreading Mohan ashes with beautiful day playing, then boys like you as "you stayed" and benvi kiss and paxton calling and back to the kiss and I'm like OMG WHAT IS SHE GOING TO DO I HAVE CLASS TOMORROW AND ITS ALMOST TWO BUT FUCK I NEED TO KEEP WATCHING THIS. I always feel like that when I'm rewatching even if it's not two am and I dont have class the next day lmao

You are going to think I'm super horny but probably "why don’t you show me the bitty spark you’ve been saving for his mattress?". It's the one I reread the most after all. The awkwardness of the situation?? Their great characterization??? Devi having no idea of what to do with Ben of all people making her feel like that??? Fab and Eleanor still unsure about him at school and being cutely protective of Devi??? Ugh, just kill me already (please dont)

"you're gonna fall (but i'll catch you)" is also great! I love to read adults au for shows about hs characters and hs aus for shows about adult characters idk why but there are not enough adult aus for nhie in my opinion and yours is my fave!!! Plus Ben being so into stories is adorable as someone who really sees herself in Abed Nadir. Plus the way is not just about their romance but also Devi dealing with grief and her complicated relationship with her mother and self destructive tendencies and... ugh I just love it.

It still feels kinda weird to say someone is racist over this, but yeah, now that you point it out I see it. - i think the disconnect comes from the way fandom uses words like 'racist' to build cases about how it's Objectively Wrong for anyone to like a certain character, whereas the word itself applies to a whole spectrum of behavior and morality. like, it shouldn't actually be that uncomfortable to admit that ben can be and is sometimes racist, he is a walking definition of privilege. him internalizing racist sentiment should hardly be surprising. but it also doesn't make him irredeemable scum. he's obviously a really caring character, as well.

on a related note, yikes @ those students who committed micro-aggressions to your childhood friend. as they get further and further into their life, may they reflect and do better rather than double-down.

I dont mind seeing people criticize characters cuz like we are all entitled to our opinion even if I disagree, but I guess it kinda shocked me still. I guess I forgot about how in some ship wars I participated in when I was 13 some people would call the other characters rapists and stuff after being away from typical fandom toxicity for so long lol. - i get it, i get it. for me, there need exist a gaping divide between exposing myself to critical or even harsh reads of characters i love and/or identify with for the sake of refining my own read of the text and giving the time of day to people who aren't engaging sincerely with the text. protect yourself in the echo-chamber!

About the tone shift: yeah I did, but it didnt feel "drastic", just different. In a bad way. - VINDICATION

but jfgdf - I dont hate season 2 as much as you seem to - i feel compelled to clarify that it's not that i hate season two, not really. it's more that the season let me down and then, by nature of netflix shows' release schedules being what they are, forced me to sit with that disappointment for over a year. it's that i love season one SO MUCH, i couldn't reconcile how much i didn't vibe with season two. on paper, you're right, the tone difference is not drastic, but the emotional response it elicited in me definitely was.

and I'm like OMG WHAT IS SHE GOING TO DO I HAVE CLASS TOMORROW AND ITS ALMOST TWO BUT FUCK I NEED TO KEEP WATCHING THIS. I always feel like that when I'm rewatching even if it's not two am and I dont have class the next day lmao - i love you for this, and 1.10 is such a valid choice she really is That Bitch

You are going to think I'm super horny but probably "why don’t you show me the bitty spark you’ve been saving for his mattress?". - first of all, embrace the horny within. it's important to the show that you do, we're in the spirit of the source material here! second of all, this choice makes me really happy because i love that fic and generally speaking, people are a little shier about giving feedback on smut but, like, that's hands down some of my best writing (both for d/b and more generally). so. thank you.

Fab and Eleanor still unsure about him at school and being cutely protective of Devi??? - you may already know that i'm writing a long-form follow-up with 'bitty spark' acting as the prologue since it sounds like you picked through my blog a bit and i feel like i never shut up about the sequel BUT ANYWAY one of the best parts about it is ben finding himself enmeshed in the girl squad, if i do say so myself. (x)

I love to read adults au for shows about hs characters and hs aus for shows about adult characters idk why but there are not enough adult aus for nhie in my opinion and yours is my fave!!! - okay, well now i'm going to think about you every time i read an adult AU for a high school show or a high school AU for an adult show.

thank you for fueling my vanity and for stopping by my askbox in the first place!

[soupsnakessss]

bj stanning ben from nhie in every social media when EVERYONE can see devi x ben is basically mindy x bj, my boi isn't even trying to hide it anymore lol.

(just for fun, can we list out all the bevi/mindybj parallels? there's obvious stuff like devi having south indian heritage and ben being jewish AND their names literally being ben/benjamin, but are there any other similarities? i think mindy has spoken before about how devi was inspired by her own childhood etc.)

Hahaha. Ok here goes:

-

Ben comes from a well off family and his dad has famous clients.

BJ comes from a well off family and his dad was a ghost writer for clients like Magic Johnson, Nancy Reagan, etc.

-

Devi has a deceased parent.

Mindy has a deceased parent.

-

Devi and Ben’s chemistry mostly comes from their witty back and forth banter where they aren’t afraid to be honest or say mean things to each other— this is how Mindy and BJ are.

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Devi has anger issues and is impatient. She can let her big emotions cloud her judgement and actions. Mindy has described herself as a hothead and says her biggest fault is impatience. BJ has described Mindy as being the most fiery person he has ever met.

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Ben is very moralistic and upfront with his emotions. BJ’s writing and interviews largely deal with moral themes and he’s very open about his love for Mindy on social media. Ben is also a calm, polite, even-keeled person. Mindy has said the first thing you notice about BJ is how calm he is and that he is poised and worldly.

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Devi and Ben are intellectual equals. They love to compete with each other.

Mindy wrote in her book that her late mother told her, BJ is your equal. Mindy has also said that her and BJ’s individual talent inspired and made each other better in the writers room of The Office.

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Ben wears a Patek Phillipe watch.

BJ… wears a Patek Phillipe watch.

[closetedshowfan]

Why I ship Devi and Paxton on "Never Have I Ever".

Okay, so obviously season 2 of NHIE finally came out so conversations about which ship of the triangle is the superior one has arisen once again. Now, I am no hater of any ship. Yes, i may be critical, but am no hater. Ship and let ship, is my motto. That said, I am personally a daxton shipper. Here is why.

I rewatched season 1 to watch season 2 because I forgot a lot of the first season in the long wait between the two. After watching if from the beginning, I couldn't help but see just how much Devi and Paxton's relationship had evolved. I mean, homegirl literally asks for Paxton to have sex with her in the beginning. And from there they start acknowledging each other where even his best friend (Trent) talks to her.

People can say that he was shallow to ice her out after kissing her, but guy was pretty much the first one to help her out each time she needed before then. And he didn't even ice her out until her mom made her comments towards him. I think everyone forgets they are still high schoolers (regardless if the ages of the actors).

I think the reason I cannot particularly ship Ben and Devi is because I think Ben's feelings manifested because she is the only one who gave him any attention. Ben's parents and girlfriend didn't. And I forgot how rude and racist he was towards Devi. Them ending up together without more growth on Ben's part would just be kind of toxic to me in the fact that he was quick to jealousy and anger when upset. Not saying Devi isn't the same. It's just unless I'm wrong, even in the first season the only times Devi ever said anything rude or insulted Ben was as a reaction to what he said.

Also, I don't think I can completely forgive the forced kiss in the home theater. How is this different than the kiss with Paxton, who also just planted one on her, you may ask. Well, the reaction Devi had after each. One she pushed away from, and the other she pulled towards.

Regardless, I'm still very much team let Devi heal and mature. But both Devi and Paxton seem to be growing as characters by being with each other. Ben and Devi seem to bring out the worst, but that Malibu/friend reconciling thing is one of my most favorite parts of the whe series.

I don't know, I just feel that Ben and Devi are better as friends, but confuse that attention and feelings for love because they are teens. As for Devi and Paxton I feel as though they both feel the other is too good for the other so their relationship is tentative.

Anyways, that's my opinion. Would love to hear yours. As already mentioned, no judgment here. 🤗