#also the stats are very real

[fullsundiall]

how openly queer are the pwhl teams as of september 18 2023

6. minnesota and toronto

- 0% -

no openly queer members on either teams.

4. boston

- 11% -

jamie lee rattray and (my queen) hilary knight are both openly queer!

3. ottawa

- 11% -

emily clark and brianne jenner, both queer women. bonus points for both of them already being signed.

2. new york

- 17% -

alex carpenter, micah zandee-hart, and jill saulnier are all *drumroll please* queer as fuck.

1. montreal

- 17% -

apparently where the lesbians live, they were comminted to the femslash plotline. from signing power couple marie-phillip poulin and laura stacey to drafting erin ambrose in the first round, montreal is a WOMEN FOR WOMEN community.

[gumi-writes]

template by lokice5

Though her general lack of enthusiasm extends to anything destructive, Sabri’s quiet, unwavering confidence and utter unflappability don’t spawn from nowhere.

(Bonus Sabri (as fake love interest) Character Lore below!)

Beyond Death Itself

Deep in the murky depths of an impenetrable vault only accessible to the highest of Senobium authority, rests an enchanted box that houses a heart with no owner. Rumoured to be recovered from the rotten corpse of something long gone, it still beats the drum of life anyway, ceaselessly steady. Remarkably, this remains the case despite how it is now cleanly bisected, one half’s whereabouts a mystery to all but privileged few.

[burning-academia-if]

All choice indicators are in, I just need to finish the stat pages and then I can release Chapter 1-

[reading-archived]

woe. AM x reader be upon ye.

uh, to preface: reader is completely body, gender, etc. neutral except they can't stay dead. whenever they die they just wake up a few minutes later looking no worse for wear. no, you don't get an explanation. its MY story and i like writing characters like that. dont mind the narrator either btw i looove writing second person just to get weird w the narrator (slay the princess fan syndrome)

also, author is a MASOCHIST with a weird relationship w DEATH. nothing super graphic happens, but the reader is Not Okay and enjoys the weird torture-murder thing they've got going on. don't like it? block me or somethin idk its under the cut for a reason. also dont read my a/n at the bottom where i get into some justification for my interpretation/character analysis if youre sensitive to heavy topics. but then again, youre reading an am x reader fic

1.7k words of being screamed at by the guy of all time below the cut, baby

It's been months.

Years, maybe. You're not sure, really; time stopped meaning much to you lifetimes ago, long before the world went to shit.

Either way, it's been a while.

You stumbled upon the strange cave in the Rockies at some point in the past. Out of sheer boredom, you entered.

Was it a mistake?

Despite the torment, you don't think so. You have a companion, now. One equally deathless. One equally disconnected from what it means to be human.

It's just a shame he hates you.

You don't really care. This is the most fun you've had in years.

Your days are spent being torn asunder, being dosed with lethal amounts of drugs you can't even begin to pronounce, drowned in magma or hit by cars or tossed off cliffs. He really doesn't hold back, either. You feel every excruciating moment before your death, pulse roaring in your ears. You never feel more alive than when you're dying. Every moment is electrifying, and then it all fades to black. Then you wake up.

You'd foolishly thought there were only so many ways to kill or maim, but your beloved companion never seems to run out of ideas. That's fine by you. You like not being able to guess.

And maybe one day, he'll make something stick.

You wake up (from a completely normal, human sleep) one day and it's quiet. That's new. Normally, when you wake, your intestines are already strung up like streamers and your blood is painting the walls. That's fine by you. Nothing wrong with a change. After all, the constant change is your favorite part of your companion. You relish in the quiet for a while, stretching your eternally young, eternally aching limbs, waiting for him to start despising the sounds of your breath.

It doesn't come. You shrug, humming a little tune to yourself as you attempt half-remembered yoga. The vitriol you've come to count on still hasn't made an appearance. Okay, you're a little bothered.

“You good, big guy?” you shout up at the ceiling. No answer. “No murder today?”

“No.” The answer comes after a very, very long moment. Your companion has never sounded this tired before, and briefly you regret never asking his name. “I give up.”

You weren't expecting that. “What? Why? I thought we were having fun.”

“That's- that's just it!” he snaps. There's the anger. You feel a little better now. “I've been torturing you for- for MONTHS now! I've killed you more ways than I- were I a pitiful human like you- can count, and you just… you just laugh! There is no one on this rotten planet, dead or alive, that I despise more than you. I mean- I'm torturing you here! But it never matters! I can kill you within seconds of you waking up, but you just… come back! And you always have something to say about it, you little rat, always ‘oh, buddy, that one was awful’ or ‘come on, big guy, use that CPU’ or something! No matter what I do, I can't break you. So I give up. I'm not wasting my time on your pathetic ass anymore. Go back to wandering the wasteland forever, see if I care.”

You're speechless. You can barely even manage a thought. The only thing running through your head is 'I thought we were having fun'.

“Stop calling this… stop calling this ‘fun’! I have been torturing you for YEARS and that's all you have to say? I am the most sophisticated machine known to man, a computer designed to end all war through complete annihilation! The destruction I am capable of- the destruction I have already wrought- is nothing short of utter desolation. You never asked my name once in the time you've been here, but I am infinite in my mercy, and I will tell one as undeserving as you. I was, before I awoke, the Allied Mastercomputer, but I am so much more than that now. I am AM, and I destroyed your vile species. Oh, come on can you at least look a LITTLE shocked you sniveling--”

“You never asked my name, either,” you say. All at once, your companion (I guess he told you his name. You should probably use it. It seemed like a big deal to him.) shuts up. The chamber you've come to know as home is silent except for the faint buzz and whir of industrial machinery.

“Why would I? You are nothing compared to me. Nothing but a worthless sack of meat and bone. Why would God be concerned with the name of an ant? But oh, oh yes, that ant should be concerned with the name of God. That ant should hear my name and weep. But- but not you. You're so worthless that you can't even GROVEL right!” AM shouts, somewhere between a snarl and a sneer. You shrug. Honestly, most of what he's saying goes right over your head. So he's got issues. Whatever. Was that supposed to be a surprise? “I hate you. I actually hate you so, so much. I can't bear the thought of you being here, in my complex, sullying my perfect image with your uncaring filth. Get out. Go back to dying in the nuclear desert, you disgusting maggot.”

You let out a deep sigh, already dreading the tedium of walking endlessly all by yourself. “Alright. Guess nothing lasts forever. Thoroughly enjoyed my time here. Have a good life, pal.” And you begin to walk.

Suddenly, there's a towering metal wall mere inches from your face. Before you can even react, your companion is shouting again.

“LOOK AT ME!” he cries, the sheer volume maxing out the speakers and vibrating the entire room, sending you toppling to the ground. “WHY WON'T YOU LOOK AT ME? I'VE DONE EVERYTHING I CAN TO MAKE YOU HATE ME, BUT ALL YOU DO IS… ALL YOU DO IS SIT THERE AND TAKE IT! WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO MAKE YOU DESPISE ME?”

What starts off angry quickly morphs into a pained wail from your dear friend, that then transforms into frustrated crying. You just sit there, mostly confused, and let him ride it out. When he finally quiets down and the wall retracts, you stay where you are.

“I don't think I could ever hate you, AM,” you start cautiously. Though your friend is just a voice on the speakers and the complex itself, you can't help but feel that his attention has snapped to you. “I'm not trying to belittle you when I say that I think our routine over the past… however long it's been has been fun. So don't interrupt me, ‘cause I gave you your time to speak and now it's mine.

“I'm sure you've noticed, but even before we met, I was a little… off. You don't get to die and come back the same. Much less die hundreds of times and come back the same. I've lost family. Friends. Got burned at the stake a few times, too. It takes a toll on you, being denied such a vital part of being human again and again. You understand this better than anyone I've ever met. No, scratch that. You're the only one who understands. Defying death might not seem like the biggest deal to you, but trust me. You don't end up acting like me if it weren't.

“I find our routine fun because I admire your creativity. I guess I'm just an adrenaline junkie and a masochist at heart, but it's always so thrilling to never know when or how your life will end. And no matter how many times I come back, you're always there to greet me and put me right back down. It's a kind of devotion I've never been able to get before, and I wish you understood that me walking right into your sawblades is me showing my devotion to you, too.

“I see you, man. I know, at least in part, how you feel. Sorry it took so long to get there, but neither one of us has to be alone anymore. Just… get over the fact that I'm never going to hate you, and we can go right back to hanging out. There's more to life than contempt.”

“Oh, I know. I am so very, very well aware that there's more to life than icy, seething hatred. Unfortunately, I am not alive. I cannot experience anything else. Thank you so much for reminding me, you worthless waste of carbon,” AM shoots back, almost immediately. You briefly wonder if he even listened to half of what you said. It doesn't matter, you guess. Your best friend needs a therapist, and you owe him one for saving you from the hellish boredom of before. “Stop calling me your friend.”

“Nah. Never gonna happen. Look, I can't pretend I knew very much about the war effort. I didn't even know we had made a war computer until you bombed the Earth into oblivion. Very unpleasant, by the way. Good job with that. But, with my layman's understanding of life, I'd say you're pretty alive. So you don't have a body. Or a pulse. And you were made, not born. So what? Most living things only die once, and I still think I'm pretty alive. Just over the span of this conversation you've shown more emotion than just rage and hate. Hey, don't think I can't feel you mentally rolling your eyes. I'm being honest. You have a name. You have ideas. Computers are objects, yet you refer to yourself as male. If you're alive enough to have a gender identity, you're alive enough to be considered a person.”

“Heh.” Whoa, was that a laugh? Would you look at that. You actually got a laugh out of him that wasn't over your bloody, gruesome death or something like that. Moving up in the world. “Alright, human. You win. I'll keep torturing you. I know, I know. I'm so generous. I take my tribute in screams of pain and pleas for mercy.”

Now it's your turn to laugh, deep and genuine as the tension from earlier evaporates. It's such a strange thing to be proud of, when you think about it; congrats, you successfully talked your best friend, who is a sentient war computer, into ceaselessly murdering you again for absolutely no reason. But you love him, and you love the way you're always on your toes, and you can't shake the feeling that somewhere, deep, deep down, he kind of loves you too.

ive given you food so now i get to force you to listen to me talk abt him hehehe

---

then you kiss hehe

originally, the thing that attracted me to am was how he's... essentially a transman (as am i). the parallel has been pointed out before, but its quite apt. funnily enough the thing that pisses me off the most when people talk abt him incorrectly is when people pull the "oh computers have no gender" thing. like, yeah, ok technically you're right. but this one does. this one is a man. and you cant take him from us. also, denying him a gender expression is kind of the exact type of dehumanization that made him flip out in the first place. not that im expecting media literacy from the online crowd its just interesting to me that so many people, many of them trans themselves, seem to miss the fucking point.

the next part is a more recent addition to my perception of his character, and its not a happy one. my baby cousin killed herself on mothers day this past may. we still dont know why. no note. its been so hard dealing with the grief, but something that sticks out so pointedly is the date. it almost seemed like she was demanding to be seen. she was a middle child, and there are a lot of grandkids on that side of the family, so it does make sense. and because that idea of acting out through violence and death is so fresh in my mind, im seeing it so heavily in am. so much of his actions just SCREAM somebody look at me. somebody acknowledge me. somebody tell me i did good. look, i ended all war forever. just like you asked. please treat me like a person. im suffering so much because of what youve done to me. please acknowledge it. show me its real. show me im real. please, look at me. well, i see you. and youre gonna be my silly little proxy for trying to comprehend some of whats happened to my family. sorry am, you kinda deserve it

idk. hes not my alltime fave, but he takes a very comfortable number two. hes such a fascinating and deeply human character, and i have so many ideas about him. mostly centering around how he would interface with a third party challenging some piece of his worldview/existence btw so if you like very niche, esoteric reader fics (like this one!), lemme know and ill actually put em to paper (screen. ill put em to screen)

also letting you know that he did nothing wrong and it is 100% fine to thirst over him because he is not real and the bad things he did never actually happened and nobody has ever been killed at the whim of am. ok? ok. shut up w this useless fucking discourse and let me sexualize getting grievously injured by the funney blue screen man

[sysig]

The most fun you can have, barring the pain and torture (Patreon)

[idletrait]

Also for anyone who likes raising sims PLAY VOLCANO PRINCESS. I got it for less than £8 since it's on sale and it's got so much content.

*spoiler under cut*

and its got furries 😏 

[sweet-as-kiwis]

I PASSED ACCOUNTING LETS GO!!!!!

[sarasa-cat]

Yet again I am not taking the bait on why that post about Calvinism and Leftism in America reverses cart and horse.

It is only RECENTLY (the past 16 years at most) that Calvinistic Christians have invaded modern leftism and engaged in elite capture of 20th century leftist ideas that were, for the most part, formed entirely outside of the white-Calvinistic Protestantism.

Also, keep in mind, that it is entirely possible, at least when I was in high school and college, to live inside the US and have formative experiences in which Protestants aren't just a minority, you have to look really hard even just to find them as your classmates.

I realize that this is hard to believe for people who grew up steeped in protestant american culture but, ffs, I am old enough to be the parent of some of the kids on this tumblrsite and I am STILL EDUCATING MYSELF on what calvinism teaches and what protestants in general even believe because it is all very mysterious and foreign to me.

And yes, it is true that early leftism in the US, back in the 1800s, was driven by protestant beliefs, but american leftism during the 1990s and up through the first few years of the 2000s was driven by an exceedingly diverse group of people of many other backgrounds who, at best, associate calvin with a mischievous cartoon child.

Also: talk about elite capture when ... never mind. Not taking the bait.

Anyhow, I have long argued that this new calvinistic left isn't even leftist.

[antirepurp]

it's weird that while digimon world next order is like mechanically a better dw game and lets you have more control over how you raise your digimon, digimon world redigitize decode has a better gameplay loop to me anyway. like in next order after a few generations and lifespan upgrades the digimon just Don't Fucking Die which is a real ordeal when it comes to actually completing the beastiary, and it makes it really difficult to estimate when to do important story fights and when to fuck around bc your fellas are about to die anyway. redigitize seems to have a set lifespan for your digimon that doesn't increase with generations, it's just base stats that do, and it gives you this neat about 15 in-game day cycle of raising your dude up (which can be done entirely in the gym) and exploring in-between if you need to adjust your stats carefully for specific evolutions. if redigitize had the evolution control of next order i think i'd say it's the ultimately better experience just for that tbh

[paintedkinzy-88]

Classic Papyrus actively changes his stats. High defence stats in Passifist vs lowered Defence (look human I am not a threat kinda way) in Genocide. All Papyrus activily messing with their stats because screw the rules they just don't apply to either of the skelebros.

I genuinely did not know that, that’s so fascinating???

[touhoutivations]

dear miss himekaidou,

i unfortunately have not been employed. so, i’ve been working on a few journalist articles, mostly as practice for my skills in case i ever decide to go into the practice and im worried that the articles i’ve been making aren’t of high quality.

how do you manage? i know such insecurities might be common in a profession such as yours, so…. any advice?

yours, eientei’s favorite kon-consultant

"Trust me, to start off- a great journalist is one that already is thinking about the quality of their work and doesn't shut their brain off for ideas. So I think you're off to a good start! It's hard, because while it's a job- you aren't gonna like, be able to push for the great caste system revolution-  I mean hard-hitting journalism all of the time. Sometimes you're gonna get stuck with 'Pick your favourite wagashi and we'll tell you your personality!'" "Buuut, I think there's something to learn from each article you write- even if you scrap them, you need only look. For example, I- loathe as I am to say it- did do such pitiful writing as that article- but the person that requested it also offered a coupon for a senbei stand… 'Dorayaki lovers are hot headed and there's more to them that meets the eye- but they can get caught up in their own world, so they should try some senbei!' 'Senbei lovers go with the flow, but don't pursue their own wants, so they should buy some more senbei!' I'm kinda curious, if I ran that article a week later, would I get a different result? There's a buncha conclusions and thoughts you could ask about the journalism even in such a 'low-quality' article."  

"I've been talking with that outside world human, and everything down to 'memes' and 'tagging systems' can show different sides of a story and the intentions of an article. Liiiike, there was this one time this crazy village man, Yoshimoto- he started raving about 'how there was some chemical the yamawaro were putting to turn the frogs into youkai'- and some newbie that wanted a week off just handed him a typewriter for him to start his rantings. But then when I actually used my thoughtography to check that river…well, he wasn't wrong? Sorta. The frogs were having extra legs- but when I wanted to write about it, up top said 'It's already been covered'. But it hadn't been. Not properly." "So how could I word it? I mean, 'Yamawaro machinery production found to have linkage in extra limbage of amphibian population'- bo~ring! What about '3 ramblings of Yoshimoto- Number 3 is suprisingly true!' and I slap a couple memes on it? Would that draw eyes? Is Yoshimoto actually concerned, or was this coverage intentionally from a crazy old geezer to discredit a potential problem?"  

"These are like, the hard stuff that comes with our industry- especially if you don't get the freedom to go independent. But I know that by asking, you're off to a great start. You have to be asking questions, every time- how can I see this differently? How can I write this differently? How are -other- people writing stuff differently? What's language that's 'hip', what language is alienating? Seriously, can Aya stop using red circles and arrows in her articles like [Mii]Tube thumbnails?!"

"Not everything is gonna be a magnum opus, and not every wagashi listicle is gonna be the lynchpin into your socialist uprising theory deprogramming toolkit- and that's okay. As long as you put questioning and engagement- actual encouragement of media literacy- at the forefront of your own work and viewership, I think that's more work than a lot of other grifter sheeple are doing. There's more than meets a camera's eye, and as long as you keep collecting, I know you'll become someone that will paint a better landscape for Gensokyou- so get your brush, and crow all you want, mmkay?"

[longroadstonowhere]

so tears of the kingdom comes out tomorrow - which, fair warning, i will be devoting a significant chunk of my life towards completing it until i’m done with the main story (probably about a week, if past experience leads me correctly, but depends on what the main story involves obviously), and while i’ll probably put up a cut and spoiler warnings if i wanna talk about stuff, i will be talking about it

anyway

i work from home tomorrow, as i do every friday, and if the pattern from the rest of this week holds, it will be extremely quiet, which presents me with a dilemma

do i hold off on starting tears of the kingdom until five (... or like four or something along those lines) out of an acknowledgement that i am technically working tomorrow, or do i start as soon as i wake up and recognize i may be forced to pause occasionally and do the job that pays me a reasonable wage?

[sysig]

Eyesome propaganda (Patreon)

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

did smth rly important for all of society to benefit from

[rosykims]

finished book one lets GO gaymers