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#also there's some weird details that i didn't include
wenclairfamily · 13 hours
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My Review of the OFFICIAL Wednesday Novelization
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Recently, MGM released an official novelization that re-tells the events of Wednesday Season 1. What makes this novelization most notable is that it is told in the FIRST PERSON from Wednesday's perspective. Thus, you are getting the chance to relive the entire first season inside of Wednesday's mind this time.
On one hand, this provides great insights into Wednesday's character, and provides some explanation for certain moments in the show that I originally thought didn't need to be explained. For example, the piranhas Wednesday unleashed early in the first episode... we now know she was able to get them from a pet shop owner after black mailing him with information she had about him and his secret mistress. It makes an already dark moment in the show even more dark, and I love it!
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However on the other hand, I sort of enjoyed how in the show: we had to guess what Wednesday was thinking just by looking at Jenna Ortega's face. I think it was way more fun at times to imagine what was going through Wednesday's mind, versus knowing with certainty what she was thinking. Additional criticisms I also have include how the book uses very little of Wednesday's actual narration from the show, and the bizarre choice of skipping certain scenes of the series, while over explaining in details other scenes (including a few short moments Wednesday wasn't even present at).
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However all these flaws are made up for with the fascinating insights into how Wednesday views Enid. To be clear, this book does NOT say Wednesday has a romantic interest in Enid. However... Wednesday's first person narration does have Wednesday slowly admit to herself that she does view Enid as her best friend... although Wednesday also admits that is by default, because she also considers Enid her only friend (with characters such as Eugene, Bianca, and Xavier only being described as allies). Throughout the later half of the book, Wednesday also describes herself as missing Enid whenever she's not around, even talking about how she misses the bright colors she wears.
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Also, while the book for the most part does not contradict what happened in the show... there is one small retcon the book throws in. As Wednesday wishes to grow closer to Enid, she wishes to find some way she can better relate to Enid, and give them both something in common they can talk about. Since Enid now has a boyfriend, Wednesday (according to her first person narration) decides to try a romantic relationship with Tyler (so that she and Enid can grow closer due to both having boyfriends now). So according to the book... in her own weird way... Wednesday kissed Tyler as a way to get closer to Enid... which I think is a BRILLIANT RETCON!
So while the book is a bit uneven at times (and likely could have used one more rewrite), and does eliminate much of the unspoken subtext that occurred during scenes in the show... it still is a fascinating novel. The insights into how Wednesday's brain thinks is very entertaining and imaginative at times; including fun new dark jokes Charles Addams himself would be proud of. I would not recommend casual fans or people that have never seen show read this book... but for hardcore fans (and fanfiction writers that need some new inspiration on how to write Wednesday): this is definitely worth your time.
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dravidious · 5 months
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Typing Tips That I Stumbled Upon Randomly:
The Ctrl key lets you jump between words really quickly. If you hold Ctrl and press the left or right arrow keys, instead of moving your cursor 1 character you'll move it a whole word; if you want to edit that word that's 3 words back, you can just hold Ctrl and left-left-left, and you're there.
Even more useful in my opinion, if you hold Ctrl and press Backspace you'll delete the entire word you're on. That's just really nifty because a lot of the time when you're deleting you want to delete the whole word, so this is much faster.
Also, idk how well-known this is but holding Shift and moving your cursor will make you highlight any characters you move over. That's useful on its own, but combining that with Ctrl lets you quickly highlight whole words or sentences, so you can easily copy+paste them. You can also hold Shift to edit any selections you made with your mouse or something.
Also it took me too long to realize that the Home and End keys are actually really nice sometimes. Home takes you to the start of the line you're on, and End takes you to the end. Hold Shift while doing that and you can highlight the whole line. Very nice for programming. Also holding Ctrl and pressing Home or End takes you to the top or bottom of the page, but I barely use that.
A similarly useful key that I also overlooked is the Delete key. It's like the Backspace key, but it deletes the character in front of your cursor instead of behind it. Just like with Backspace Ctrl+Delete lets you delete a whole word in front of your cursor.
Also Ctrl+A lets you highlight the whole page.
Also even when you're not typing and instead just browsing a web page or something, you still technically have a cursor; if you click a piece of text, then hold Shift and press the arrow keys, you'll start highlighting text.
Practice Exercise: Click on the t in this word, then hold Shift and press left and right on the arrow keys! Now try holding Ctrl+Shift while you press the arrow keys! Hold Shift and press Home or End! Hold Shift and use your mouse to left-click on different spots in the paragraph and see how your selection changes!
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lucalicatteart · 2 years
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Poll adventure (paventure? lol) Day 8: !!NOTE: this is different from the past polls - rather than choosing a story action, you're picking supplies to craft a little makeshift boat (EX: wood will be the main platform, so there should likely be the most of it, however, if there were 100% votes for branches and 0% votes for rope, then it'd just be a pile of wood held together by nothing - keep them balanced reasonably, etc.))
(✦ see past poll results + further information HERE (link) ✦)
The winning option of yesterday's poll was that the adventurer should get around the barrier by crafting a little boat to take a river detour….
~
Finally crawling out of his hiding spot in the brambles, he meticulously brushes the leaves from his clothes and composes himself, now fully focused on his generic traveler's map of the area... After checking it about 500 times just to make sure he isn't confused, he determines that going down the nearby river would likely still get him where he's trying to go, and hopefully be much less treacherous than wandering through haunted forests or confronting the stern gaze of the barrier guards..
It only takes about 10 minutes of following a narrower rocky path off the main road to reach a nice shaded spot of land next to a small river. He kneels in the grass, eagerly rummaging through his backpack for supplies, in addition to whatever he can scavenge from the edge of the woods. The rush of excitement slowly dissipates however, once he realizes that he.. actually.. might not know how to make a raft as well as he thought... Surely it's quite straightforward, no? Just.. make it look like it does in picture books?? There are no rules, as long as it floats, it works! Probably anyone could build one on intuition alone! ... maybe...???
.. Once again sinking into a cloud of anxiety, he slumps over, staring at the pile of materials with teary eyes, doubtful what to even do next.... How should he build the raft? Help him by using the poll to choose the appropriate amounts of materials (determined by final % of votes in that category)!
#paventure posting#polls#choose your own adventure#Hopefulyl this isnt confusing or anything?? I know it's different than the other ones. and I wont do them this way#very often or maybe not ever again. I just wanted something that was really short and easy since the last two has#*had such long explanation text and more effort going into like what different paths there could be and etc.#Since before I add a poll option I make sure that it's something that could actually be followed to it's logical conclusion and like#actually happen (like I didn't include 'fight the guards' in the last poll because obviously just realistically he would lose#and be sent to whatever this worlds version of jail is and then probably the story would end lol. It could then become about#strategizing a way to break him out like.. obviously you can still do something with that and it can still be interesting lol. but I just#mean it kind of derails things a little too heavily. if that makes sense. etc. etc.). But becaue I've been busier lately and since#the last ones were more detailed I just wanted to think of like.. a really quick goofy one with simple choices#So instead of dictating new story paths - for this time it's just .. help him build his raft that he needs to complete the last story#path that was chosen. By picking an option you're kind of adding to the amount of that option being done#if that makes sense. so for example if at the end of the poll it was 100% votes for flowers - he would just have a pile of flowers#with no raft or anything. If it was 100% wood - he would just have a pile of tree branches held together with nothing#etc. etc. Ideal measurements are probably at least over 50% wooden branches. and whatever of anything else.#As long as there's also rope lol. 50% branches and 50% flowers still wouldn't be anything really jhhj#ANYWAY..#Though it could go wrong I'm actually not expecting some sort of weird result. most people have voted very reasonably so far#and are not like trying to sabotage him or anything or choose the weirder choices. Like last time there werent that many#votes for sneaking around the barrier or trying to bribe the guards. I think people chose stuff they thought he could reasonably do#Maybe they want to see him and the little cat succeed in their endeavors#Though there was one person who reblogged a poll once saying something like 'everyone lets make him EVIL!'#which is also valid lol
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ktempestbradford · 7 months
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I have been on a Willy Wonkified journey today and I need y'all to come with me
It started so innocently. Scrolling Google News I come across this article on Ars Technica:
At first glance I thought what happened was parents saw AI-generated images of an event their kids were at and became concerned, then realized it was fake. The reality? Oh so much better.
On Saturday, event organizers shut down a Glasgow-based "Willy's Chocolate Experience" after customers complained that the unofficial Wonka-inspired event, which took place in a sparsely decorated venue, did not match the lush AI-generated images listed on its official website.... According to Sky News, police were called to the event, and "advice was given."
Thing is, the people who paid to go were obviously not expecting exactly this:
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But I can see how they'd be a bit pissed upon arriving to this:
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It gets worse.
"Tempest, how could it possibly--"
source of this video that also includes this charming description:
Made up a villain called The Unknown — 'an evil chocolate maker who lives in the walls'
There is already a meme.
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Oh yes, the Wish.com Oompa Loompa:
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Who has already done an interview!
As bad (and hilarious) as this all is, I got curious about the company that put on this event. Did they somehow overreach? Did the actors they hired back out at the last minute? (Or after they saw the script...) Oddly enough, it doesn't seem so!
Given what I found when poking around I'm legit surprised there was an event at all. Cuz this outfit seems to be 100% a scam.
The website for this specific event is here and it has many AI generated images on it, as stated. I don't think anyone who bought tickets looked very closely at these images, otherwise they might have been concerned about how much Catgacating their children would be exposed to.
Yes, Catgacating. You know, CATgacating!
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I personally don't think anyone should serve exarserdray flavored lollipops in public spaces given how many people are allergic to it. And the sweet teats might not have been age appropriate.
Though the Twilight Tunnel looks pretty cool:
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I'm not sure that Dim Tight Twdrding is safe. I've also been warned that Vivue Sounds are in that weird frequency range that makes you poop your pants upon hearing them.
Yes, Virginia, these folks used an AI image generator for everything on the website and used Chat GPT for some of the text! From the FAQ:
Q: I cannot go on the available days. Will you have more dates in the future? A: Should there be capacity when you arrive, then you will be able to enter without any problems. In the event that this is not the case, we may ask you to wait a bit.
Fear not, for this question is asked again a few lines down and the answer makes more sense.
Curious about the events company behind this disaster, I took myself over to the homepage of House of Illuminati and I was not disappointed.
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I would 100% trust these people to plan my wedding.
This abomination of a website is a badly edited WordPress blog filled with AI art and just enough blog posts to make the casual viewer think that it's a legit business for about 0.0004 seconds.
Their attention to detail is stunning, from how they left up the default first post every WP blog gets to how they didn't bother changing the name on several images, thus revealing where they came from. Like this one:
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With the lovely and compact filename "DALL·E-2024-01-30-09.50.54-Imagine-a-scene-where-fantasy-and-reality-merge-seamlessly.-In-the-foreground-a-grand-interactive-gala-is-taking-place-filled-with-elegant-guests-i.png"
"Concept.png" came from the same AI generator that gets text almost, but not quiiiiiite right:
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There are a suspicious number of .webp images in the uploads, which makes me think they either stole them from other sites where AI "art" was uploaded or they didn't want to pay for the hi-res versions of some and just grabbed the preview image.
The real fun came when I noticed this filename: Before-and-After-Eventologists-Transformation-Edgbaston-Cricket-Ground-1024x1024-1.jpg and decided to do a Google image search. Friends, you will be shocked to hear that the image in question, found on this post touting how they can transform a boring warehouse into a fun event space, was stolen from this actual event planner.
Even better, this weirdly grainy image?
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From a post that claims to be about the preparations for a "Willy Wonka" experience (we'll get to this in a minute), is not only NOT an actual image of anyone preparing anything for Illuminati's event, it is stolen from a YouTube thumbnail that's been chopped to remove the name of the company that actually made this. Here's the video.
If you actually read the blog posts they're all copypasta or some AI generated crap. To the point where this seems like not a real business at all. There's very specific business information at the bottom, but nothing else seems real.
As I said, I'm kinda surprised they put on an event at all. This has, "And then they ran off with all our money!" written all over it. I'm perplexed.
And also wondering when the copyright lawyers are gonna start calling, because...
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This post explicitly says they're putting together a "Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory Experience" complete with golden tickets.
Somewhere along the line someone must have wised up, because the actual event was called "Willys Chocolate Experience" (note the lack of apostrophe) and the script they handed to the actors about 10 minutes before they were supposed to "perform" was about a "Willy McDuff" and his chocolate factory.
As I was going through this madness with friends in a chat, one pointed out that it took very little prompting to get the free Chat GPT to spit out an event description and such very similar to all this while avoiding copyrighted phrases. But he couldn't figure out where the McDuff came from since it wasn't the type of thing GPT would usually spit out...
Until he altered the prompt to include it would be happening in Glasgow, Scotland.
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You cannot make this stuff up.
But truly, honestly, I do not even understand why they didn't take the money and run. Clearly this was all set up to be a scam. A lazy, AI generated scam.
Everything from the website to the event images to the copy to the "script" to the names of things was either stolen or AI generated (aka stolen). Hell, I'd be looking for some poor Japanese visitor wandering the streets of Glasgow, confused, after being jacked for his mascot costume.
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HE LIVES IN THE WALLS, Y'ALL.
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r--kt · 6 months
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Do you like Kakashi's dogs? Let's talk about why there are eight of them.
another example of naruto's ✨cultural code✨
contents | the eight dog warriors chronicles · legacy · eight confucian virtues. also look at the cuties love them sm
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Naruto Vol. 10 CH 90
[ one dog is wonderful, I'm saying as the owner of a sweet little york terrier. two dogs are good, they won't be bored together. three dogs? yeah, cool! how are you going to walk them though? four? yes... look, maybe we have to draw the line h- wha- EIGHT? Excuse Me!? ]
surely, it's worth starting with the fact that eight is a lucky number in Japanese culture — everybody watched Hachi. of course, this is not the only cultural detail where the eight is mentioned. I want to pay special attention to a thing that I didn't know about until I googled it, and this is clearly what Kishimoto was doing homage to with Kakashi's eight ninken.
The Eight Dog Warriors Chronicles
Better known as Nansō Satomi Hakkenden. and it's not just some kind of book, it's a novel, consisting of 106 booklets written by Kyokutei Bakin in XIX century. Hakkenden is considered the largest novel in the history of Japanese Literature. this is one of the main representatives of the gesaku genre, which includes works of a frivolous, joking, silly nature. further I will emphasize a few more times how damn popular this work is and how often it is reflected in culture.
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here are some illustrations for these books
now let's talk about the plot. It's weird, but it's weird at samurai-dogs-story level so stay here.
In brief, the story tells about the commander Satomi Yoshizane, whose native lands were attacked by the army of a man, whose forces surpassed those of Satomi, and the samurai in despair swore to a dog named Yatsufusa that the dog would get his beloved daughter Fuse as a wife if he chewed that man's throat. surprisingly, the dog not only understood the owner, but also fulfilled his wish! after that the commander refused to keep the promise. however, Fuse, true to her word of honor, went with Yatsufusa to the mountains and became his wife. upon learning that his daughter was pregnant, Satomi, in a rage, sent a samurai to kill Yatsufusa and bring Fuse home. she stood up for the dog anyways and died with him. at that moment, eight pearls with hieroglyphs that denoted the foundations of Confucian virtue burst out of her womb. (...cheers for mythology, I guess)
Soon, eight dog warriors who were Fuse's spiritual children were born in different parts of Awa province. after going through hardships, they got together and became vassals of the Satomi clan, then won the battle, and soon reached peace.
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some more illustrations made by Utagawa Kuniyoshi. from left to right: Inukawa Sōsuke (the dog warrior), Inumura Daikaku (the dog warrior), Princess Fuse (their mother).
the novel mainly tells about each individual warrior dog and his shenanigans in a funny adventurous way. huge fame has led to excerpts from Hakkenden being staged at the Kabuki Theater and mentioned in the anime and manga, such as Inuyasha, Dragon Ball, as it turned out, Naruto and so on. there's also a lot of films and video games.
The eight virtues
these are loyalty, filial piety, benevolence, love, honesty, justice, harmony, and peace.
they relate more to Chinese culture, but basically Hakkenden was inspired by it too. since I did not read the whole novel, I would still like to mention at least the values on which it is based, and which were embedded in the symbolism of this story. It's quite interesting to apply this to Kakashi's dogs. gives them more weight and depth.
It is also interesting to note that the reason why Fuse gave birth to dogs was also that her father was cursed earlier in the story in a way that his descendants would become depraved like dogs. in Japanese culture, dogs embody the duality of character: the same mentioned filth and depravity, and devotion and bravery. so as samurai. but this is a different conversation, more related to Kakashi and his dog poetry.
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Did you get here? Here's an additional discovery for you✨
Pakkun's name (パックン) is derived from the Japanese onomatopoeia “pakupaku” (パクパク) which reflects the sound of munching.
Kakashi, that's very sweet of you.
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thank you for reading this to the end ♡
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a-very-tired-jew · 5 months
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More JVP Shenanigans
TLDR; JVP's Haggadah was put together by goys and their tax filings show they have no intent to help and/or represent Jews. We all know JVP is the Autism Speaks of the Jewish community. They exploit Jews and try to present themselves as a Jewish organization concerned with systemic discrimination, Palestinian rights, antisemitism, and much more. Hell, you can go look at their core values on their website and a lot of us would agree that these are good things.
JVP uses all that as misdirection. It uses Judaism as set dressing for its own agenda and exploits people’s ignorance. However, if you have just a little bit of knowledge you can tell that JVP is not only exploiting Judaism, but it is an organization that has wholly embraced Jew face and does not know what it’s doing.
Take a look at their Haggadah.
Their Haggadah was clearly put together by goys who didn’t know what they were doing. Many of the translations for their blessings are wrong or were clearly put through google translate. Other blessings are slapdash put together or grabbed from other Seders. Take a look at this blessing:
Baruch atah adonai eloheynu melech ha’olam asher kidshanu b’mitzvotav v’tzivanu l’hadlik ner shel (Shabbat v’shel) yom tov. Blessed is the spirit of freedom in whose honor we kindle the lights of this holiday, Passover, the season of Freedom.
Do you see the issue? For those who don't know, there is no mention of Passover in the blessing at all. So why is it in the translation? They also didn't include any of the extra words for Shabbat in the translation as well. If you have the patience, go through and read it. It omits the story of Passover, dismisses the importance of the holiday, and just changes the entire thing for their agenda. Edit: Above is about last year's haggadah as someone pointing out in the replies. Below is the link to this year's and it's just as bad, but this time they have a lot of tokenization to justify why they change the entire holiday to support their agenda. It literally asks you to write to the NY Times at one point...
“But it’s a Jewish organization, I swear!”
Well let’s look at their tax filing where they as a 501(c)3 have to describe what their organization is and their intent.
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That's weird. A Jewish organization that states it fights against antisemitism and is committed to Jewish communities has nothing on their filing about Judaism or Jews in any capacity. It's mission is regarding education about Palestinians. Some of you might say "what's wrong with that?" There's nothing inherently wrong with that mission statement. What is wrong is that JVP hides its intent, bigotry, and antisemitism behind a veil of Jew face. It claims to be a Jewish organization, but it can't even get basic translations of prayers right. It omits, misleads, and misinforms about our culture, history, and traditions in such a heinous way that it's downright disgraceful. JVP does not represent the Jewish community and at this point it's clear that they're Jewish in name only.
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in3rci4 · 5 months
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maybe you could do TBP boys x GN reader who is always serious and calm and doesn't have the habit of smiling, smiling for the first time
Thank you for the request and for giving an idea too 😊🥹 ! I appreciate it , hope it's not too bad ❤️‍🩹
" And then they smiled , that's what i'm after . A smile on their eyes , the sound of their laugher"
The title comes from a small piece of the lyrics of the song " Drift away" from Steven Universe
Prompt : The Black Phone boys reaction at the reader who's always serious and calm , smile and laugh for the first time
Characters included: Vance Hopper , Bruce Yamada , Billy Showalter , Robin Arellano , Griffin Stagg , Finney Blake
WARNINGS !! : Character x reader content , no use of y/n , idk what else to say , Gn ! Reader , Reader might have some backstory I guess ¿? maybe a mix of Fluff and Angst ¿? Some gonna be shorter than others , spelling mistakes
Vance Hopper
You two knew each other for some time now , you were home schooled not so long ago so you didn't had an idea of Pin Ball Vance Hopper reputation . The moment the teacher assigned the both of you for a project , you weren't walking on eggshells like everybody else did with him while talking , you didn't expect anything from him , for you , Vance was just ... Vance . That's the exact reason why you befriend him in no time , your non judgmental personality , and you were completely unaware he wasn't like this with anyone , anyone but you . Even if your words were nice and honest he noticed how cautious you were with your movements and expressions , he thought it was weird at first , your voice didn't matched with the look in your face in his opinion , but Vance got used to it pretty quick , he's not a smiley guy either , he was ... A little more grumpy person than you . Just like usual , in the weekend you would stay by his side watching him play his Pin Ball game , and also making sure he didn't beat anyone if anything went wrong with it , but those are details . You got hungry and decided to buy Mrs Ellen a small snack bag , when you went back to the side of the machine ( not too close to possibly bump it though ) he started to get close to beating his high score . You gasped in excitement and then he heard the sound of the machine saving his new record on the top of it . Vance let go of the arcade game machine and started to shake you excited as well by your arms , you doing the exact same thing with the snack bag still in your hands
" You did it Vance , you finally beat your high score !"
You said with a smile while laughing of enjoyment
" See !? Told ya , told ya I would fucking beat that shit , didn't I !? "
You kept laughing and smiling from the happiness of had seen it happening after so long , so many failed tries were worth for this day to happen . Vance in the other hand stopped moving your body to stare at you instead .
You were smiling , smiling in a genuine , happy and .... He would say in a beautiful way too . Is this how you look like when you're happy ? The real you ?
Maybe he should try to get you to smile more often .
Confused about the sudden change of attitude you asked him with a small giggle
" Vance , are you ok ? "
Yes , he would be ok , as long as you are with him for a little longer like this .
Bruce Yamada
He was a popular and loved guy , he didn't had trouble hanging with almost everybody in school, and Bruce didn't have to do any effort in finding someone to date either . And yet , a particular classmate of his , you , was the one that had all his attention . A person that minded their own business and never had smile in front of anybody before , and still looks like a magazine model .
Bruce wanted to get close to you for years , but he never had the opportunity , ironically , he never had the courage to go straight at you and tell how good looking you are , you look so serious that you kinda scared him , but not enough to stop liking you .
The biology teacher didn't had a clue how happy he made Bruce the day he paired you and him in a project for the science , finally he could have his opportunity , his chance with you . Dying of anxiety inside like his first baseball game , he asked you
" Hey , I know we never talked before and stuff , but would you like to stop at my house tomorrow to speed up things ? For the project , you know ? Maybe we could go out somewhere in the weekend if everything goes well "
Looking into his eyes and with suspicion in yours you asked as well
" As a date ?"
He wasn't expecting you to be straightforward as well , so he fidget with his fingers a little and with a nervous yet bright smile he said
" Yeah , I mean , if you want to of course "
The recess bell rang and everybody stood up to be free again , you grabbed your book and walked towards the door , but before you leave you said looking at him
" it's a date then "
With a smile that could've killed Bruce if he didn't want to stay alive to see you tomorrow , God bless the biology teachers man .
Billy Showalter
His dog Harper was Billy's loyal companion , a very well behaved girl too , never biting things that she shouldn't , no barking unless there's danger or she's commanded to , not jumping into people in excitement , in general , a really good girl . The mornings delivering News Papers are much better with her by his side , at that hour people are still processing their awakening and there's little people on the street , but the ones that are outside never got a complain about her , in fact , they usually want to ask for permission to pet her instead . Lately someone that he seen outside at early morning was you , sometimes with groceries in your hand , sometimes only walking by yourself . You were one of Billy's classmate , but he doesn't talk with anybody in it , at least not anymore , and you were no exception . Sometimes he founds himself staring at you and then snapping out of it , trying to ignore whatever feeling he had to do such thing , but something about you , that mysterious unexpressive charm , the stern look in your eyes , is something that he can't quite describe with words and is afraid of digging for a definition in his mind . Unfortunately for this boy one of those mornings you decided to walk your rescued male dog and Harper for the first time ran away towards the dog to meet him , both with waggy happy tails sniffing each other . Billy stops his bike at a mailbox and runs towards her , to you
" Harper ! Harper ! I'm Sorry , she's never like that , I don't know what's up with her "
The female dog comes close to you waiting to be petted , and you were more than happy to give her what she wanted
" it's ok , she's a really good girl , she just wanted to meet the new handsome boy here "
Billy knew you were referring about your dog , but his stupid brain still made his cheeks burn from the blush , why's he's being like this ?
Harper licks your hand and you giggle from the tickle feeling in your palm , you smile , and he smiles too . More pleased about the morning you said
" You want me to walk with you while you deliver your papers ? Then we can both take the dogs for a walk "
Something more mysterious about you was how quickly you made Billy accepted the fact once for all about his crush about you , maybe the moment your face light up with your smile had enchanted him
" Yeah , I don't mind , Harper hasn't seen that many dogs around anyway "
Harper always helping him in the simple things , she's for sure getting a special treat today after you're gone .
Robin Arellano
He may not seem like that , but he's a person with a good memory and remembers a bunch of people even they don't remember him ( Difficult to say since almost everybody in school knows his name ) . He remembers you from elementary school , Robin thought you were the cute one of the class , although his classmates prefer to call you the " quiet " one . He noticed how you never changed , always focusing on your studies and never smiling , not even for the photos , not even for politeness , always keeping your expressions neutral and seriousness in your way of acting .
Life crossed your paths the day a bully that didn't find his victim who didn't showed up in school decided to go after you instead , poor choice of decision , because Robin did , he showed up , and beat him up .
After he was done , he walked on his way to the boy's bathroom , but you stopped him , and Robin was deep down afraid he messed up things instead of making them better between both of you
" Robin ! "
Trying to keep his cool when he hears your voice behind him , he turns around and responds
" yeah ?"
Without finding more words to describe your gratitude , you kept it simple and said with a gentle smile
" Thank you "
Yes ! He did impressed you ! It was all damn worth it !
" No problem "
Robin walked again feeling like the main character of an action movie , and you smiled at him too ? You ? The good looking and serious you ? Nah he ain't forgetting this day for nothing !
Finney Blake
This year he wasn't sitting alone on the back on the class , well , he was still on the back on the class , but he was sharing his desk this time , with you . Finney had to admit it was hella awkward , I mean , he can't complain that much since it could be worse or Finney himself is too much of a shy guy to start a conversation or keep it on with a stranger . You , his desk mate , never talked to him , not even once , and your cold serious personality didn't make things easier , the two of you introverts , teachers never had to complain about the noise that you guys could make in class . A regular day in math class the teacher talked about the possibility of numbers being negative and being under the 0 , this got the interest of the students because it was something relatively new so far .
Finney murmured to himself casually
" Damn , not even numbers can't stay positive "
It was a bad joke ? Yes , but it was so unexpected he stole a snort and giggle from you , you had to shut yourself up with your hand or else more laughing would be heard by the teacher .
In Finney's opinion it was a terrible one , he's not even that funny , he was surprised yet amused at your sudden change of expression . Maybe he could push his luck a little further ?
" I guess we can't be negative if we just started "
You stopped from escaping a laugh from your mouth once again , maybe Finney couldn't see your complete smile , but your half closed happy eyes got his ego fly over the roof .
They say " stay with the one that makes you laugh "
So don't worry , laugh all you want from now on , he's good at math anyway , he can always teach you if you got too distracted for him .
Not like Finney minds your company at all .
Griffin Stagg
The day he saw you smile after 2 years of watching you keeping your face as unexpressed as possible , was the day a older group of bullies bumped into him , and God , he was so fine with being invisible for other students and not dealing with being a punch bag , that he tried to run away as fast as he could before they could do anything . But stronger and experts on making kid's lives hell , they quickly grabbed his shirt and started to mock him and test him in front of everybody in the cafeteria . Griffin didn't say anything , he couldn't , or else it would be worse , he knows that like the back of his hand . 3 tall dudes , 1 grabbing his shirt , 2 grabbing each of the boy's arms , it seemed like everything was lost , but you pulled up the one in front of Griffin by the shirt and tucked him to the ground . The two boys left pushed Griffin to the ground as well , and went straight to attack you .
But you dodge all of them easily .
After giving the whole cafeteria a show to watch , the boys got up and swore that it wasn't over , but you couldn't care less . You walked towards Griffin and offered him your hand , he stays still without knowing what to say or do more than stare in confusion , until he spoke
" Thank you ... For helping me "
With a big bright smile that didn't fit someone like you , so serious and capable of defeating 3 guys , you responded
" It's nothing , now get up Griff "
Griff ? No one has called him like that before . But , it doesn't sound bad , right ? He kinda likes the nickname .
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morningmask27 · 7 days
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acrylic on canvas 30x40 cm
it is very evil of Belladonna to not bite women when she probably has the entire lesbian community on their knees now
anyways, Dracula's Ex-Girlfriend was so fucking good and despite my hatred of drawing (let alone painting) humans it compelled me to create something.
I'm just going to leave a wall of commentary on the process under the cut because I need to chatter about all of this real quick
I chose this scene at the end because 1. it was super hard to find one still where Bella and Fay are both properly visible (yet somehow Fay's still facing the other direction) and 2. this scene just hits a bit different to me.
the discussion of smoking, a thing that's bad, but it being life, right as Bella drank that bartender dry made me think of a few things I experienced and while I personally will still keep on going against what Fay said here, I still got to see things in a somewhat different light I guess.
Fay's care is also so present here. Bella is self-destructing massively, but Fay still comforts her, even after she "fell back" on her bad habits (she never quit) and this hug just hit me personally quite a lot. the silent care, the "you're warm". I can't fully describe everything it makes me feel, but this scene was good.
on a more technical level. I had to take some creative liberties with the lighting and such because it was DARK and my painting skills aren't ready to make such minute details with extremely dark colors. It would get ugly and muddied, so I had to adapt. the harsh shading on Bella's face is less striking, but I don't know if I could make it better with my current skills.
This was also one of the first times I've really rendered a human face; Last time I "tried" it was 1. without a ref (unwise) and 2. when I was even worse at drawing humans and I ended up so mad at this painting that I Could Not Go Paint Again for a while because of how mad I was lol, so I'm honestly really impressed with how I managed to do this without making a huge mess.
At least until I got to add the blood. It still looks good now, but I had to fiddle a lot with the reds I used and the skintones to mitigate the damage of a few first strokes that got too grandiose.
I also decided that Fangs. I am a bit of a vampire researcher and seeing the different traits they get in different media is always fun and here the fangs seem a bit retractable, but Bella's a vampire and I am a sucker for fangs, so I had to include them.
my handwriting also didn't fail me too horribly, even if I had a few accidents and had to clean them up before I got this "clean" little text. I really don't have good brushes for very thin and precise strokes (nor the capacity to not tremble the entire time honestly)
This was honestly quite fun too. Four hours of listening to some music, having a weird moment with my mother on the phone and just painting. I did really not want to draw Bella's face at first and drew nearly everything else before I began, but once I did I got into the groove and it went fine, so I'm pleased with this.
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httpswritings · 6 months
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unable — Alexia Putellas x Reader
Warnings: mentions of past sexual abuse (not getting into detail of how that happened) and what it leads to for reader, therefore mentions of anxiety, fear to be touched, etc. 
Word count: around 770
Summary: Second part of discovering true love. Alexia and reader get into a relationship together, and reader have the need to tell Alexia about her past. Alexia comforting reader.
A/N: I've already warned about these sensitive topics above, so please only read if you feel like you can. 
After your conversation last week, Alexia had been educating herself about how you felt, how to behave so she could help you, and what the procedures were in case you experienced a panic attack or anything related.
Sometimes she felt awful for desiring you.
Her eyes wandered throughout your body, but she stopped when she noticed her arousal grow.
You were also struggling with your desire for her.
Craving her sexually, but being too afraid of the idea of sex was driving you mad.
Alexia was sweet. Her voice tone was delicate, and her laugh was adorable.
You noticed the way she avoided touching you, just in case you felt uncomfortable, and honestly, you were grateful she was being so considerate about it.
You two kept having conversations about different topics, including your past, to get to know each other. 
As you saw Alexia interacting with friends and family, you noticed how much physical contact she held with everyone she was close to.
Some weeks passed by, and your trust in Alexia kept growing.
She didn't insist on you doing anything to or with her. There were no stolen kisses. No waist-grabbing. No second intentions. 
Your girlfriend was respecting your boundaries, and for the first time in a really long time, you felt like you were being respected.
When Alexia was kissing you, her hands stayed on her waist. 
It would probably look weird to someone who was not familiar with such a sensitive topic, but you appreciated Alexia's consideration, even if you knew she was craving some physical contact from you.
It wasn't until the third month of your relationship that you felt the desire to be touched while you were kissing.
The thought of it interrupted your make-out session, and you abruptly broke the kiss.
“There's nothing wrong, Ale. It's just... I want you to caress my waist, my hair, my cheek, anywhere that's not sexually intimate, while we kiss. Is that okay?”
“It's okay for me. Are you sure, princesa?”
Her face showed a worried expression, making you melt.
“I'm sure.” 
You looked at your girlfriend, as you held both of her hands.
You placed her left hand on your waist, slightly reacting to the contact.
Alexia looked at you worriedly, but you assured her that you were okay.
Actually, you were a little bit uncomfortable.
Her hand stayed still, but the feeling of being touched grossed you out.
You didn't know how to explain what you were feeling.
Craving Alexia's touch, the desire to feel her hands throughout your body.
Feeling as if you wanted to throw up, your body unable to be relaxed.
Alexia noticed how your breathing increased, and she abruptly removed her hand.
“Talk to me, princesa. I need to be aware of what you're feeling so you're as comfortable as possible.”
Your shame only grew faster. Alexia was so caring and supportive of you, that you couldn't bear feeling so disgusted by her touch.
“I'm so sorry, Ale.”
She didn't understand what you meant, reassuring you that there was no rush in your process.
“No, I'm not referring to that. I feel like such a horrible person because you're trying to be as good as possible, and I can't do anything but feel disgusted. I feel like a failure. As if that person broke me when they did that to me. I'm so sorry you cannot experience a normal relationship, but—”
Alexia stood up. She wanted to get your attention as you were rambling, but she knew touching you was not an option.
“Listen to me. I love you, and I'll wait for you. I know that you feel disgusted, even when our arms are touching by accident. At first, it was hard. I'm not going to lie. But knowing that it is a common trauma response, I do not take it seriously. You're not broken, nor are you a failure. You're someone who is not only so strong, but who deserves time to heal. So again, I love you and I do not regret being your girlfriend. It's true that I'm sexually attracted to you, but that's not the only reason I love you. You're funny, caring, and intelligent. You have a great ability to memorize things; we share the same favorite book and the same love for football. I could spend hours talking with you about anything, and you know that I'm not a talkative person.”
You were left speechless by Alexia. You noticed how red her face was—not out of anger but carried by pure emotion.
You held her right hand and kissed it, unable to contain how moved you were by her words.
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bonefall · 3 months
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how much of Stormpaw’s demon are Maple’s curse vs just things that happen (cause in canon it’s really vague about whether Maple causes all those tragedies or has the ability to see his future for some reason)
EVERYTHING that happens in Stormpaw's Demon involves her. It's not being so dramatically renamed for nothing, she's a major driver and cause of the plot! Crookedstar's young name is in the title; but really, his demon is driving the misfortune.
That said... It's been a while and I'm heavily considering retooling the narrative.
Since I last REALLY worked on it, BB has changed in the sense that I'm a lot more willing to alter canon than I used to be. While my driving mindset used to be "telling a better version of the original story," and that IS a value I still hold... I've lost patience with the misogyny within the original work.
I've spoken at length about the way Crookedstar's Promise grinds my gears (PLEASE follow this link for a full breakdown of why), but in summary; it desperately tries to keep every male character likeable when they shouldn't be, saying nothing about the fact they are complicit in or even enabling abuse, while giving Crookedstar TWO flatly evil maternal figures. Even Brambleberry, who's heavily praised for being "like a mom instead," has a weird moment where she starts giving Crookedjaw the cold shoulder because she finds out he's chatting with a demon.
So like... I'm not sure if I want to make the "better version" of that story. That was the one that I already had, which had Mapleshade be acting entirely out of just the malice of wanting to hurt a child, while Hailstar and Shellheart are the excellent people canon wanted to see them as.
(not that it's even a BAD super edition, it's actually a really good one, but if it's my kitchen that's not what we cook here. Man I really do always massively overhaul my favorite SEs LMAO)
I think, specifically, I want to make Mapleshade slightly more morally gray and Hailstar more of an enabler. Shellheart is getting significantly retooled to make him more of the heartwarming parental figure I think he should be; someone loving to help balance out a very heavy rework.
And of course Brambleberry, I'm going to tweak her some. Try to make her flaws more consistent, get rid of that odd cold shoulder moment.
Old regulars will remember an old AU which is also still a massive favorite of mine; it was called Better Call Mapleshade, and it was kind of a commentary on how an environment can shape a person. Mapleshade, as a demon in heaven, was essentially their best prosecutor and defense attorney.
You can actually see how a lot of ideas from that AU ended up in Better Bones with the expanded trial system! I'm thinking of taking another page out of it, by making Mapleshade more aware of "the game" of Clan culture's structural unfairness, while also using it like a weapon against people she wants to hurt. A powerful demon of revenge.
Under the cut, what won't be changing, the way it was, and Draft 2 of Stormpaw's Demon.
(MASSIVE CONTENT WARNING FOR MENTAL AND PHYSICAL CHILD ABUSE including ableism. BB!Rainflower is WORSE than canon.)
WHAT WON'T BE CHANGING;
These are major details of Stormpaw's Demon that are different from canon. I'm working with these as givens and won't be changing between drafts.
Mapleshade does have a bone to pick with Appledusk's lineage specifically. One option might make her more discerning when it comes to her targets, but no matter what, she is going to have her eyes on this bloodline. She Haunts Applekin.
Rainflower is Hailstar's deputy. And I will make her downfall spectacular. If you were worried I was going to make her more sympathetic then you have no idea who I am LMAO
Shellheart is not Crookedstar's biofather While I want Hailstar to maybe be worse; I do want to fix Shellheart by making him a good parent. I've decided a good way to do this is to make it that Shellheart adopts Storm AFTER he's been abused by Rainflower. He didn't have authority over him before then. In general, I do want him to have a bigger positive role in this narrative. DEPENDING ON WHICH VERSION: Oakheart might also not be his bio-brother.
Crookedjaw is not a cruel name; it's an Honor Title. I've ALWAYS been frustrated by how canon treats scars and injuries as bad things. It's a BATTLE culture. Surviving brushes with death is their WHOLE THING. There is no "crookedkit" or "crookedpaw," he was Stormpaw until he earned his warrior name, with "Crookedjaw" commending the massive lengths he's gone to in order to survive, adapt, and honor StarClan.
Mentor change: Goodbye Cedarpelt, hello Magpiesky! I decided to repurpose one of the Barn Cats! Magpie from the books is a daughter of Perchshine-- the cat who killed Mapleshade. She joined RiverClan long ago. She's actually the one who points him in the way of the barn, and has to train him "as a punishment for teaching him disobedience" when he comes back. I actually have a couple of minor reasons for making this change but I'll spare them for now. He might start with Cedarpelt, but then run to the barn when Cedarpelt is basically refusing to train him properly.
Some family tree shuffles I need to update this tree to show Crookedstar's new situation with Shellheart (and also reflect some other changes I made like confirming Hallowflight fully being Lizardtail's honor title and Robinpaw being the apprentice who gets eaten by Ripwater), BUT, overall this tree is solid.
The ableism Storm faces is going to have a different flavor I have built BB in a way where him surviving his injury would be very respected, but he'd get badly coddled and pushed into early retirement. Him running to the barn is because he suspects he wouldn't have gotten training otherwise.
He kills a fox there because it's Cool. I might give him the tail to wear as a trophy of the kill because that's also Cool. The fox was very old and feeble at that point, which was why it was attacking chickens, but shhh
The Way It Was (Very Evil Mapleshade)
Darkstar's Commandment creating the Queen's Rights, that no queen would ever have to reveal the other parent of their kittens, wasn't enough to appease Mapleshade.
Nor was the damning of everyone that Mapleshade killed. In a fit of irrational fury at all the death, StarClan sent all her victims into the Dark Forest.
But she can't chase them. In the Dark Forest, you don't see someone unless you WANT to see them, not unless you're hanging out in a "land mar" (a sort of personal hell that all demons get).
on the off-chance she does see them, Frecklewish usually rips her to shreds...
Which is the next problem.
You can't DIE in the Dark Forest if you're a demon. You poof back into existence the next day, no injuries, no scars, nothing.
she's bored.
And vengeful. In spite of the wrong being righted, she still thinks she deserves MORE revenge, because what she wanted was really Appledusk.
She finds it unfair that HER legacy is snuffed out, that it's Darkstar's Commandment and not hers, that her babies were destined for greatness and by extension SHE should have been great.
So she takes up a hobby in tormenting Appledusk's descendants. She wants to eradicate them completely, but is spiteful enough that she'll just settle with hurting them.
The first one she managed to kill was Applefrost, Reedshine's son. Just by accident. She didn't know she had such power over the mortal plane.
After that, she managed to drown Duskwater. The daughter.
But she couldn't wipe out HER daughter in that storm... and she brought two more Applekin children into the world.
Stormkit and Oakkit.
So, naturally, Mapleshade turned her sight on the little fuzzball.
He would be an easy kill, in theory. She smashed Stormkit's jaw on the rock, but Oakkit pulled him out.
From there, it's similar to canon for a bit. His recovery is long and painful.
Rainflower is disgusted, and wants absolutely no part of helping him through this process.
That wasn't an injury gained in battle-- it's because he's careless and didn't listen to her. He's going through all this suffering, and for what?
To never become a warrior?
She's cruel to him, begins to neglect and distance herself from him. Discourages him from suckling.
Mapleshade LOVES this. It's worse than she could have imagined. Rainflower is horrible.
Gleefully, she realizes that Stormkit dying now is what Rainflower wants.
So, she kills two other kits in the nursery.
Fallowtail's only survivor is Willowkit, so she has plenty of milk. She starts suckling Stormkit.
(Graypool is now an older sibling! She's actually an apprentice at this time! Later, she encourages Willowkit to visit their father, who decides to just kidnap them completely)
Eventually, being the deputy, Rainflower had some kind of conversation with Hailstar.
During that conversation, she asked him to do something very cruel to Crookedkit.
And Hailstar LOST IT
He's the successor of Volestar, who was appointed by Darkstar herself to uphold the Queen's Rights and protect children.
How DARE you try to turn RiverClan into a place of disrespect?? To use my power this way?!
So, her power was stripped, and Oakkit and Stormkit were taken from her.
From there, Storm eventually goes to the barn as discussed, and Mapleshade continues to do things to hurt him.
This was my first draft, and now having thought about it a lot, I feel like it's not super cohesive. A demonic Mapleshade who's entirely malicious is neat, but I feel like this makes her flat. Shellheart's not tied in super well either, and Hailstar's stand feels kind of hollow because Rainflower hasn't actually used or leveraged the new authority I've given her.
But most egregiously? Rainflower's abuse being so close to canon tastes kind of bland. I feel like I can make it sooo much more intense, complicated, and painful.
Draft 2 of Stormpaw's Demon (Demon of Revenge Update) Essentially an outline for the first few chapters establishing Mapleshade by dealing with Rainflower and then fragments for the rest.
Mapleshade's still malicious, but this time, there's more to it.
Darkstar's Commandment, and the damning of her victims, DID appease this Mapleshade.
But is she satisfied? No.
She doesn't feel like she was wrong at all, actually. Without her killing those three in revenge for her kittens, StarClan's anger probably would have subsided.
She can't hunt her victims down again though, because, they don't want to see her. She fights Frecklewish every now and then but what's the point?
She WON already. She already GOT the euphoria of dragging them all down with her.
Punishing everyone who had ever wronged her was the highlight of her existence... but now it's done.
She's in Hell and she's bored. Her punishment is never seeing her kits again, but more importantly, her punishment is eternal shuffling through the leaf litter when she's SO GOOD at getting revenge.
Problem with revenge is, when you get it, it's gone.
She probably messed with Duskwater and Applefrost a bit, but if she killed one of them, it was accidental. It made her realize that revenge without a motive is just boring.
The prologue would probably open up with establishing her as a character. Who she is, what she wants.
Because the first chapter would dive RIGHT IN to Stormkit. The only child of Rainflower, the deputy.
Right along with Stormkit, you only learn in hindsight that he was born in a storm that killed his grandmother. It's clear that Rainflower reminds him of this often.
And that she's nasty to him. Giving him unclear instruction and finding things to critique, telling him to jump and then barking at him that he didn't ask how high.
She has great expectations for him, and reminds him of their family lineage often. Of who killed his great-grandfather, of what a fantastic pair of warriors Applefrost and Duskwater were
"I lost everything the night you were born. You'd better be able to make up for it."
Unfortunately, Stormkit is not the sort of child who's good at listening to those sorts of orders. He's stubborn and defiant; angry and oppositional.
When he doesn't understand why you do something, he doesn't want to do it
He "embarrasses" her a lot, and gets hurt for it.
In public, these are swats and whacks. The things you're "allowed" to do to discipline your child. In private these are a lot more severe.
So when Stormkit is given an order or a command, he obeys completely out of fear rather than respect. And sometimes he forgets his fear.
The other cats in RiverClan? Well... Stormkit is a problem child, and Rainflower is a fantastic, organized, respected deputy.
Hailstar especially, unfortunately. He feels bad... for Rainflower.
"It must be so hard for her to have such a little brat as a son. He never seems to learn his lesson. When will he stop wandering off? What's wrong with him? He certainly didn't get that from her."
His best friend, Oakkit, gets in the SAME trouble he does.
He's mischievous, fearless, and outgoing, and... never gets punished for it.
There's times where Oakkit does something and Stormkit physically recoils, just imagining what Rainflower would do if HE did something like that. Especially in how Oakkit talks to his dad, Shellheart.
For example, Shellheart will come to get his son for suckling time and Oakkit will tell him to his face things like, "I don't want to! I'm HAVING FUN!"
and shellheart doesn't flip out. He just. explains why it's important to eat on time.
"I know. But Fallowtail wants to go have fun too! She's waiting for you to come and suckle so she can go play."
"Well why can't she just play now and I suckle later?"
"When a suckler is full of milk, it makes their belly very itchy. She's uncomfortable when you don't come and eat on time."
"nnnh"
"Tough sell? How about I sweeten the pile with a badger ride back?"
"Hm. You drive a hard bargain, Mr. Dad."
Stormkit doesn't know why he hates it. He's all angry inside when he sees them acting friendly. He's polite because Oakkit's his best friend and Mr. Shellheart is really nice, but he just...
He's too young at the time to know he's envious. He wants what Oakkit has so badly it hurts.
Sometime after an exchange like that, Stormkit is visited by Mapleshade for the first time.
And they talk about Stormkit's anger and resentment. Stormkit lets it slip that he HATES his Mi.
Waits for Mapleshade to stop him and tell him, like everyone else does, that "she's still your mother."
...but she doesn't.
Besides Oakkit and Shellheart, she's the first person who doesn't tell him that.
She just lets him talk. Lets him go on. Starts making nasty jabs, which make him laugh.
"She says she lost everything the day I was born!!"
"What?! That's crazy! She got you that day!"
"Right?! It's like she's saying I'm nothing! Maybe she SHOULD lose everything, then she'd know what she's got!"
And then she asks, "Do you want her to die?"
Suddenly, there's a chill in the air. He's really shocked by the suggestion of that. He didn't... he didn't mean it to go THAT far. That's not what he meant... is it?
But she's fading back into the shadows, just her eyes visible in the dark. Tells him that she can see he's unsure. That's ok.
Holds up a budding sprig of sycamore, the maple she's named for. Its buds grow in a "deer hoof," with one large bud in the middle and two "toes" sprouting on its sides.
Teaches him that if he needs someone in his corner, all he has to do is call.
(to summon her, a bud is plucked off the sprig and thrown in the river.)
He wakes up with the sprig in his paw, panics, and shoves it under the nest he shares with his mother.
The experience shakes him. He probably ran to Brambleberry for the first time, who explains very seriously that he was contacted by a demon.
From the description... Mapleshade. The cat who killed his great-grandfather.
He BEGS her not to tell Rainflower. PLEADS with her. He can barely hear her already saying yes under the throbbing sound of his heart in his ears.
When he calms down, he hears her saying yes. On the condition she will need to smoke the nursery with sage and cedar, and that he will be needing a bath as well.
When he's still concerned that Rainflower will question him, she makes a plan to distract her for a day, long enough for him to do his cleanse and the smell to fade.
And, of course, that he will not follow any instructions that Mapleshade left him. He agrees. But does not tell Brambleberry about the sprig.
For a while he's very "well behaved." But it's not about him, never has been.
It really doesn't take long at all for Rainflower to get worse. Kids who are defiant like that are usually exercising a defense mechanism-- if they're not aggressive about their boundaries, their limits are pushed to a breaking point.
And after a big blowout like this, which was probably a public spectacle, Stormkit runs back to his nest and digs out the sprig, runs to the river, and throws a bud in the river.
Having calmed down from his shuddering fury, the dread begins to set in as a dead-smelling wind ruffles his fur. He can't help but feel like he just did something very stupid out of anger.
Looking at his reflection, he sees no cuts or swelling. The blows weren't "bad enough." He doesn't have the kind of injuries that anyone would do anything about. Equal parts guilt and frustration swell in him like a tide at full moon. How could he be sitting here wishing she hurt him worse?
So he tries to soften it, "I don't want her to die, I just, I... I just want her to lose everything like she says. Please..."
The wind whispers in his ear, "it will get worse before it gets better."
"I can handle that," he sobs, "I can do anything. Please. Make it stop."
After that, Oakkit probably runs to come find him. Stormkit doesn't want to be found. He makes up a childish plan, on the spot, to run away and join ThunderClan.
Oak says that's mousebrained, but Storm has DEVOTED himself to this plan he made just now.
And is crossing the stones.
Oak sighs, but if Storm's going to ThunderClan, he should really go with him because then they could totally fight off a small fox (Childish hubris)
Unfortunately, Rainflower found them. asks Exactly What He's Doing.
The kids freeze. Stormkit in particular has that horrible, twisting anxiety that you get when you hear The Tone that means you're in for an absolute wallop when you get home.
He's about to start running, but then the voice tickles his ear-fur again. Mapleshade tells him to go back. It'll be ok. She's on his side. She'll make her pay.
Oakkit is still frozen in place when, as if possessed, Storm's body stiffly returns to his mother.
There's a silence. The river trickling through the stepping stones. Storm looking with fear and anger up at her.
She's waiting for an apology, groveling. He doesn't give her one.
So she raises her paw and gives him an awful, hard blow.
His little body twists, flung off balance, trying to correct himself, and he can swear he felt paws pushing him a second time, whipping him downwards.
The feeling of falling fills his stomach, the water sloshes into his ears before there's a ring of a sound like CLUNK-CRUNCH, and then the river floods his nose and mouth.
It all goes dark.
When he wakes up, it's with a throbbing pain in the side of his jaw so intense that he can feel it all the way down in the tip of his tail. He learns from Brambleberry that Oakkit rescued him-- jumped right into the water to pull him out. And then Rainflower pulled him out. That was when Shellheart came and found them.
There's a LOT of arguing outside, but Storm can't ask what it is because it hurts to move his mouth at all. Brambleberry hushes and soothes him, telling him it's nothing he needs to know about.
(MEDICAL INFODUMPING: i do actually have a medical reason I want his injury to come from someone hitting him which causes him to fall. The injury he'd get in canon would actually be a really simple and common split in the front of the mandible, which wouldn't cause his mouth to have a dramatic twist and would heal very easily. He needs to come down on the rock at an angle to shatter the joint like that.)
From here, the tune about Stormkit starts to change.
Oakkit was distraught when they got back, telling everyone that Rainflower smashed him against a rock.
Rainflower's story is that he was running, and she chased after him. EVERYONE knows that he has a habit of doing this.
Then HE slipped and fell and hit his face on the rocks. His fault.
Oakkit was running away with him, he's lying.
Shellheart is FEROCIOUSLY taking the side of his son, furious that she would imply he raised a liar.
Hailstar is taking the side of Rainflower. It's two troublemaking kits against his deputy.
Yes, Rainflower's disciplined him before, but that's no indication she'd do something like this on purpose.
Brambleberry weighs in that the injury that Stormkit has isn't the sort of injury a kitten gets from hitting his jaw. The bone is shattered.
probably does some kind of visual to go along with it, using a stick and a stone
"The bones of a kitten are like the young shoots of a tree. When they fracture," she takes a young twig and snaps it in her paws. The fibers in the center are bent but unbroken, with the bark splintered around them, "they flay but don't snap."
She places the stick on the ground, "So for the injury that Stormkit has," and violently smashes the rock down onto it. It's shattered and pulped, the fibers flattened, "there would need to be a great force."
Shellheart hisses, saying that THIS is the evidence. Oakkit's story is consistent but Rainflower HAS to have lied.
Several cats are now on his side.
...But more are on Rainflower's.
"She's his mother. She loves him. Oakkit has to be mistaken."
"Why would she chase down her own son just to smash his face on a stone?"
"She wouldn't pull them out of the river if she really wanted to hurt him!"
Hailstar prompts if there's ANYTHING else that could explain this?
It comes up that Brambleberry cleansed the dens the other day.
She says that it's possible there is a demon's influence at work. She can't know for sure which one it is-- but it may have a grudge against Rainflower.
She allows them to reach the conclusion that it's probably Mapleshade on their own. She will be talking to Crookedkit when he's able, but she's not about to tell anyone about his dream yet.
She doesn't want him to have the extra scrutiny when he needs to rest and heal, but if she'd shared that an unnamed cat had a demonic dream, it would set off panic as cats accused each other of dark magic.
Rainflower manages to escape consequences by pointing out that it was likely Mapleshade that injured her son.
Oakkit is still trying to tell everyone SHE did it, he SAW it, Stormkit walked back and she hit him and smashed his jaw on the rock
But he's hushed. It's decided there's not enough evidence. And not enough reason to doubt the noble deputy.
She's never done something like this before, after all. It's more likely it was an accident.
There is a group of cats that are dissatisfied about this, though, and it only grows when Brambleberry explains that Stormkit's prognosis is not good.
There is a very high chance he will die. Even adult warriors can wither slowly from this sort of injury.
Recovery will be slow and it will be painful.
...but after that incident? Rainflower gets bolder. She got away with it in public. She got a taste of the leverage she has, how much they trust her.
Stormkit spends a lot of time floating in between his dreams and his living-world pain. There's at least one interaction where he speaks to Mapleshade, screaming at her that he TRUSTED her, he KNOWS she's the one who hurt him! How could she?!
She can't say much, kept at bay by a hazy smokescreen of sage. "You must live! You must survive!"
Her old words echo in his head; It Will Get Worse Before It Gets Better.
Throughout the recovery, Rainflower grows more cruel and more distant.
In public she likes to talk about how difficult this is for her, but he's strong, he will survive.
In private, she'll do things that hurt him, like repositioning his head in a way that "his jaw will heal better in." When he cries, she's unsympathetic.
"You brought this on yourself. This is for your own good."
Her definition of "private" is also changing. She's getting more comfortable with snapping at him in front of limited groups of people.
Since she's deputy, the other two parents in the nursery, Shellheart and Fallowtail, do their best to care for Stormkit while she's away. He's pulled away from them when she gets back, any ideas or suggestions they have vetoed.
When they try to go to Brambleberry about this, she shakes her head with frustration and tries to make them understand she knows... and she's just as unhappy with it as they are.
She tells them she keeps going to Hailstar, but he's still hesitant. Even though she's trying to tell him that Stormkit's recovery is being undermined.
"Rainflower's son has always needed tough love. She's his Mi and knows him best... she's still taking care of him. Give her a warning before suggesting anything drastic."
In the other draft, I had Mapleshade kill two of Fallowtail's kits to free up milk for Stormkit. I'm not sure I need that anymore honestly, plus, this rework's heavy enough! She can just have Willowkit without any deaths, while Graypaw remains an older sibling.
When Brambleberry informs Rainflower and Stormkit that the jaw isn't healing straight and it will probably be at an angle forever, Rainflower reacts with disdain.
"His first scar and it's nothing he earned?!"
She's reminded he might not even survive. He's lost weight. He's eating less. Stormkit curls up quietly. He hates how they talk about him like he can't hear them.
"Surviving is the bare minimum," she scoffs reflexively. There's a silence so thick you can cut it with a claw. After an uncomfortable heartbeat, she continues, "What kind of a life will he live if he-"
"a life," Brambleberry cuts in, "he'd live a life. And it can be a good one"
Rainflower growls, spitting that the twisted jaw is a disfigurement. He'll never be able to open his mouth all the way. He can't chew and he can't suckle forever. Stormkit will never become a warrior if he can't even dispatch a fish with a killing bite.
"Scars are the sign that StarClan has mended our bodies after fighting a good fight, making any Clanborn cat worthy of being an elder" Brambleberry preaches, "Names are what mark us, calling upon our ancestors to look down at us and witness our actions, Rainflower. Don't say anything you wouldn't want them to see."
Rainflower flicks her ear, seething, a rumble in her throat, "was that some kind of threat? As if I've said something wrong?"
"If you feel threatened, look within."
Stormkit resents all of this talk. He can feel his mother tensing up next to him, hears the low rumble progressing into a growl. When adults play stupid games with his mom, he's always the one who ends up dealing it. Why don't they get that?
It's only Shellheart who seems to have it click, "Hey, this is the nursery. Can you take it outside, please?"
As Brambleberry and Rainflower leave, Stormkit lays curled up in his nest, cold and alone. Oakkit leaves Shellheart's paws to curl up around his best friend.
Shellheart stares at them, shifting, but ultimately stays where he is.
There's a lot of words I could write there, between Storm and Oak. Ones where Storm speaks about how he just wants the pain to be done with. Others where Oak comforts him, tells him how much he means to him. More where they end up running into the wall that they're just two little kids and they've both learned the truth that they have no control over what happens when Rainflower comes back into that den.
But I think it would be good to end there, at the lowest point. Because it gets better.
Pissed off by being gently confronted, after her warning from Brambleberry, this is the moment where Rainflower goes too far.
Hailstar is gradually losing his patience. Every time this issue comes up, he's making some kind of new excuse for her.
She's still a competent deputy who holds the Clan together, but this has taken a toll on her reputation.
Her biggest mistake was becoming more open with her abuse after being emboldened. And I think Hailstar is beginning to feel like he's got "egg on his face."
After standing up for Rainflower several times, getting heat from Brambleberry, and now the Clan also starting to murmur...
It's getting very difficult to justify why he's sticking his neck out.
and maybe, part of him is starting to feel a little self-conscious about the way that his deputy is acting about her injured child.
When she comes storming up on this fateful day, interrupting whatever he was doing to make a proposition, it's the breaking point.
Her suggestion: "I've realized that there's only one way to ensure my son survives his injury. He's being haunted by our demon, which only started threatening him when he disobeyed me for the last time. WE need to teach him a lesson, and make sure StarClan gazes down upon him to acknowledge his mistakes."
"...how do you intend to do that?"
"Stormkit must be given a Dishonor Title."
A Dishonor Title, one of the greatest shames that a leader can put onto one of their warriors. A punishment that ranks just below exile in terms of severity.
"you want to put a dishonor title... on your child? one with a life-threatening injury?"
"One that acknowledges his carelessness. To protect him from the demon."
Protect him from the demon. "I see now what must be done."
Previously, I'd thought of Hailstar as someone who would be loud and merciless when he does this. Now I'm thinking it was something he put a lot of thought into. He stands up, brushes past her, and goes to talk to some of his most trusted cats. Brambleberry, his mate Echomist, an experienced warrior such as Piketooth or Ottersplash, and lastly, Shellheart.
So it's not a surprise to anyone but Rainflower herself. He doesn't want this to be dramatic. He doesn't want it to be another big scene. Stormkit has gone through enough.
When he eventually has this Clan meeting, he calls it quietly. In his address to the gathered cats, a crowd that Shellheart and his family are missing from at his request, he says that his greatest regret is that he didn't do this sooner. He even doubts that Mapleshade is haunting her at all-- now having seen her behavior, he says it's more likely that Rainflower bashed her own child against a rock and simply lied.
First, he announces that Stormkit will be removed from her care. He will no longer be of the Applekin bloodline.
She is banned from the nursery at the request of Fallowtail, and will only see Stormkit when supervised by his new Mi, Shellheart.
Brambleberry has already agreed to this necessity, and is performing a ritual so that StarClan may approve of this choice.
He also strips her of her deputyship, and appoints Ottersplash instead. (I might change this to a different deputy eventually)
Not everyone agrees with Hailstar. There's an uproar from Rainflower's supporters.
She was a VERY popular deputy.
More that are just uneasy, feeling that this was a BRUTAL punishment that she didn't deserve.
Lots are happy and optimistic, though. But the mixed reception is exactly why Hailstar asked Shellheart not to be here.
This isn't something Stormkit has to deal with right now.
When Darkstar herself, who created the Queen's Rights, was on her last life, she appointed Volestar to uphold the law as her legacy knowing that Oakstar might try to break it again.
Volestar appointed Hailstar, in the hopes that he would uphold her legacy in turn, to protect kittens and those who can't protect themselves.
He was late, and can only hope he was not too late. He hopes that Volestar can forgive him for that.
Meanwhile in the nursery, Shellheart, Oakkit, and Stormkit are alone, far in the back, where the padded moss keeps out arguing voices.
Oakkit, bless his little heart, is babbling with excitement because his best friend is his BROTHER now. And it's gonna be THE BEST.
He's talking about how it's fine he can't chew because now they can have soup, and they're going to make the nest bigger, and they can stay up later because they can whisper quieter if they're this close together
But Storm doesn't really hear him. His head's swimming, thinking about the dull ache in his jaw, how MAD his mom's going to be because he can't imagine her not finding a way to hurt him, how this is all his fault because he called Mapleshade.
He can't stop it anymore and starts sniffling, which turns into weeping. Still, he's TRYING not to bawl, knowing, knowing he looks stupid when he does that
Shellheart just pulls him in close, so he can bury his face in his fluffy chest. Tells him it's going to be ok. He's safe now. No one can hurt him there.
Not on his watch.
Unfortunately, it's not the last he sees of Mapleshade. After this...
Mapleshade shows him everything she did for him. Yes, she did smash his jaw-- but it was to get him away from his mother.
And she planted an idea here and there, just little whispers into Rainflower's ear. Nothing she wouldn't do all on her own.
And now... Mapleshade believes she's earned some respect.
Stormkit can't disagree... she did exactly what she told him she'd do.
And now that he's not Applekin anymore, they can be Real Friends. They could even strike up a partnership, of sorts. After all, what did StarClan do to help him?
It wasn't StarClan that answered his prayers.
I'm still figuring out what, exactly, she's going to want from him. I have a scintilla that she wants to give him a life, maybe as some kind of bridge to StarClan to see her kits?
Some strange "attempt" at redemption, perhaps? Which she ultimately doesn't get.
Not that she didn't enjoy doing all that for love of the game, mind you. She's very good at getting revenge and it's fun and exciting to pull it off.
But hey, if you're good at something, never do it for free.
What causes Mapleshade to ultimately turn, and begin haunting the bloodline again + Oakheart, is Crookedstar rejecting her in some way.
She comes to collect on her end of the bargain and he refuses, breaking their partnership. He chooses StarClan.
And then from there, it's ON again. Now she has another EXCUSE to do what she wanted to do, and take out her boredom and malice on his family.
This time, it includes Oakheart as well-- because he was Crookedstar's brother.
It was also her curse that harmed Willowbreeze and eventually Silverstream. She's on the warpath.
Maybe she actually helped make him leader on purpose. Like he explicitly asked so she helped him by making the squirrel omen, instead of just doing it for him unprompted. Still figuring it out.
Shortly after the scene where Stormkit cries, he needs to have a confrontation with Brambleberry about Mapleshade I think. She needs to explain why Dark Forest demons are seen as bad.
She's biased, of course, but it's not like she's TOTALLY wrong either. Cats like Mapleshade ARE vengeful, in ways many other spirits are not.
If you're curious, Crookedstar's dishonor title from Rainflower would have been something comparing him to a parasite and referencing his ""accident"" like Fleaskip or Midgefall.
The point she's trying to make with the Dishonor Title is that her son is an annoying bug who didn't listen, as well as subtly erase she fact she knocked him off that rock.
She wanted his name to say "everything that happened was my fault and my mom did nothing wrong"
Not that Hailstar got as far as even asking lmao
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joanofexys · 4 months
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I think what bugs me the most about what happened today other than the fact that I was the one getting vagued is the fact that the conversation got warped into one that is about morality and not simply theorizing on The Ravens and how The Nest works
my original post essentially said two things:
The Ravens are victims and to erase that because they don't fit the model of the perfect victim and some have even become abusers erases all nuance from that portion of Jean and Kevin's lives and the surrounding discussion
Cults are weird. I grew up in one. And it is very easy to manipulated by one and to feel trapped and to also be completely in the dark about what is happening in a cult even when you're in the heart of it
I did not say anyone had to forgive the Ravens (they're fictional characters. fake people. that wasn't even on my mind) or that any of them are by any means good people. i also didn't say that they were all oblivious or that there weren't some of them that were abusive. I also never made this a conversation about morality and whether or not the Ravens are good or bad people for staying in a cult.
For some reason that got warped into what we are currently discussing and involved some highly insensitive language surrounding cult victims including things being said like it's not crazy to expect people to walk away from things like scholarships, financial security, or career security if it means being complacent in abuse and that it's "just basic morals".
And I'm sorry for getting personal on this but as a cult survivor I think that's one of the most upsetting and insensitive things I have heard come from these conversations today.
It doesn't matter what x thing is whether it's money or food or housing or a career. In a cult they use whatever it is you need and make you dependent on them for it. Also with the Ravens in particular keep in mind it wasn't simply being complacent in abuse. They were being abused.
If you have been in a similar situation, if you are grappling with the guilt of leaving a cult or anything like a cult, know that you are not a moral failure for having stayed for as long as you did. You are not moral failure for staying for whatever reason you did. It is not just basic morals when it comes to living in a cult. Morality becomes warped and the concept of what is immoral and moral is something completely different and that is intentional.
It doesn't matter whether you think the Ravens were aware of Riko's abuse or not. Having differing opinions on that is completely okay. What you don't get to do is turn it into a conversation about morality where you then get to insult cult survivors like we're evil people for not walking away at the first red flag because we needed something. Because we were in survival mode and we weren't able to focus on other people.
We still don't have all the details on how the Ravens function or the type of abuse players even outside of the perfect court face other than it was extreme. It's fun to theorize. And it's okay if people disagree. But if you can't be mindful about where your opinion switches from theory to some huge declaration of moral high ground then you've lost the fucking plot.
I would love to talk more about the Ravens and my theories on them. I would love to talk more about how cults work and why I think it's possible they were completely unaware of Riko's abuse. There's a lot of nuance in those conversations and I would love to take the time to treat them with the care they deserve. I'm also still incredibly upset by a lot of the things said today and I can acknowledge that this is a topic that is very personal to me. So this is me opening up that can of worms (again) and I'm more than happy to have those conversations and answer questions but please be patient with me because if it isn't already obvious this is a topic that is incredibly sensitive to me
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existentialcrisis-9-5 · 5 months
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DCA Subnautica AU
Version #2 of the designs, including the bioluminescence! + fun tidbits on each of the goobers and a visual on Y/N!
(Edit: it’s out now! Check my bio for the link)
Eclipse is up first!
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Theirs was the first design I drew out in any detail (as shown in the crude MS Paint drawing), so it's the one that needed the most work. Even after making the more detailed version with the lights, I still ended up changing things as I got a better grasp on what direction I wanted to head in. Fun lore tidbit! Eclipse is a freak of nature and should not look like that! They're properly split down the middle between day and night. Also I messed it up in the drawing because I was tired when I made it, but they're also covered in scars and bite marks.
Sun !!
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I did Sun next, and here I had a better idea for what I was going for. There were still a few problems with this design though, which got changed. This is also where I started drawing the pattern on the tail, which I felt looked weird in this picture. Fun tidbit! Sun has an inability to express his feelings in the appropriate fish mermaid way, leading to much confusion.
Moon !!
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Moon was done last. Once again, I learned from this drawing and changed Moon's design to match, however Moon is the one that remains the most unchanged! I knew what I was going for by the time I got to him each time, so I guess that helped. Something I did alter, however, were some of the lights. I found that they either blended together too much or weren't as visible as I would have liked. Fun tidbit! This is pose actually based on a scene in one of the chapters. It was actually one of the earliest written scenes.
Y/N, my beloved <3
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I did 2 versions of Y/N, one with longer hair and one with shorter. It was important for me, when writing the story, that I kept the person I'm imagining as vague as possible, with the only physical descriptions being "physically fit" and having a few scars (for plot reasons), so this is only for me and whatever drawings I do. As a result of trying to keep it vague, I ended up going with the shorter hair (though in the final reference I made it a bit longer than shown here). Fun tidbit! The green is because whenever I'm sketching, I have 4 colours I sketch in to differentiate parts of the picture (usually background vs foreground or different people), and green was the one I used here (red, blue and purple were taken, I'm sure you can understand why). It ended up sticking, since I didn't want to go with the orange that's on Ryley's suit in order to avoid possible confusion.
That's it for now! At some point, I'll post the full references for each of them, but until then, the next thing I post will probably be chapter 1!
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handdrawnverathin · 5 months
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Hi. So, uh... it's been a while. And after all this time, I think it's time to be honest with myself and admit that this animatic is probably never going to be finished. I started it when I'd only watched a couple POVs of Third Life and it really shows in the designs. Some of them aren't bad - I still like how I drew Tango - but enough of them have details wrong or just weird vibes that continuing to draw them is kinda dissatisfying. That being said, I put a lot of work into it and didn't want to let it just die without saying anything, so here's a collection of GIFs from the few scenes I managed to get edited.
For the record, I am still on the Hermitcraft/Life Series brainrot train and I have some drawings that I've been working on that I genuinely like. So hopefully those will be done soon! Just as soon as I finish that one project that I started eight years ago. But it's getting there! I swear!
Also: for anyone interested, I've included the original frame-by-frame plan below the cut
SONG: Willow Tree March, The Paper Kites
Intro
Feet swinging over sandstone cliff face (0:00 - 0:05)
Lower half of Grian’s face visible, whistling (0:05 - 0:12)
The cool bit
Fade to front face view of Grian, looking up slightly (0:12 - 0:16)
Real quick zoom out to all players standing in a row looking dramatic (0:16 - 0:28)
Title card fades in as overlay (0:20 - 0:28)
Player introductions
(0:28 - 0:30)
(0:30 - 0:32)
(0:32 - 0:34)
(0:34 - 0:36)
Peaceful times
Grian walking through a forest, early morning. First frame is a footstep, then a side view of him looking around (0:36 - 0:44)
Flower Husbands meeting, afternoon. First frame is Scott peaking into the hole from outside, then Jimmy looking up at him sheepishly (0:44 - 0:52)
Renchanting looking up at the sky, sunset. First frame is a hand raised to block the sun, then a rear-view shot of them from the waist up (0:52 - 1:00)
Phantom shelter, night. First frame is a wide view of the group either hiding or fending off phantoms, then a close up of a few of them laughing with each other(1:00 - 1:08)
FIRST DEATH
Wide shot of Scar burning the tree (1:08 - 1:12)
Close-up of Grian’s face as he looks to the side. Creeper visible in the reflection of his eyes. (1:12 - 1:16)
Scar doing some smooth talking. A wisp of smoke fades in behind him.(1:16 - 1:20)
Close up of Scar’s face turning around, eyes widening (1:20 - 1:22)
Yellow heart (1:22 - 1:26)
The promise
Wide shot of Monopoly Mountain, cut to close-up of Grian swearing loyalty with a hand over his heart (1:26 - 1:34)
Close-up of Grian’s face, mostly the eyes, looking a little unhappy with the whole situation (1:34 - 1:42)
Tensions rising
Skizz looks at an enderman: over-the-shoulder shot of him looking back, then a close up on his eyes widening (1:42 - 1:50)
Cleo threatening Pizza - animated? Initial/final poses plus two in-betweens (1:50 - 1:58)
Tango’s lava game: first a close up of his smiling face, then a wide shot with his arms outstretched in front of the challenge (1:58 - 2:06)
Scar threatening Ren for the enchanter: first an over-the-shoulder shot of Scar, then one of Ren (2:06 - 2:14)
Uh-oh
Wide shot of ceremony (2:14 - 2:18)
Ren, kneeling, waist down and cloak on (2:18 - 2:22)
Low-angle shot of Martyn looking very uncomfortable. Winces a bit, axe raised and…  (2:22 - 2:28)
Swings down. We get a flash of Ren's face, grinning, before fading out. The red eyes linger just a bit longer. (2:28 - 2:32)
O_o
Flower wall burns down (2:32 - 2:40)
Rear view wide shot in silhouette
Front view, sad and also a little horrified
Desert battle (2:40 - 2:48)
Profile view of Grian with a slightly manic smile on his face as explosions go off. The camera is pretty close to him, so we can’t actually see the explosions, but add in some effects and it’ll get the point across
Siege of Dogwarts (2:48 - 2:56)
Aerial attack using slowfall arrows
Ground combat feat. Joel and dogs
 Bdubs kills Impulse, Scar kills Bdubs (2:56 - 3:04)
Interlude
Scar (right) kneeling in the water before Grian (left). We can see Scar from about chest down and only the lower half of Grian’s legs (3:04 - 3:12)
Low-angle shot of Grian looking down at Scar holding a sword. We can see Scar’s head and maybe a bit of his back depending on camera angles. (3:12 - 3:20)
Fade to the Tree in a dark void, glowing as if by firelight. Very slow pan out. Fade to a wider view before the light is extinguished, leaving us in darkness.  (3:20 - 3:28)
Ghosties (dark gray background, white outlines)
Jimmy/Cleo/Skizz (3:28 - 3:32)
Joel/Scott/Etho (3:32 - 3:36)
Tango/Ren/Martyn (3:36 - 3:40)
Impulse/BigB/Bdubs (3:40 - 3:44)
They want blood (survivors haunted by ghosts)
Grian, with chestplate and sword, looking very much like he’d rather be anywhere else(3:44 - 3:48)
Scar, also not having a good time, sword and shield but no chestplate (3:48 - 3:52)
Facing each other, no weapons or armor. Scar of left, Grian on right (3:52 - 3:56)
Close up side view of Grian’s face: scared, then steeling himself (eyes closed) then shouting as he runs in (3:58 - 4:02)
The girls are fighting! ;A;
(4:02 - 4:10)
(4:10 - 4:18)
(4:18 - 4:26)
We have a winner
Full body behind shot of Grian standing at the edge of the cliff before falling (4:26 - 4:36)
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pinkynana · 2 years
Text
cw : stepbro!nahyuck x fem reader, stepcest, mention of somnophilia (but not written in detail), pussy eating, threesome, blowjob, degradation, praising, unprotected sex, breeding kink, breast play, dumbification, tell me if i missed anything
a/n : i'm sorry for being away for a month. i'm gonna disappear for another month, i think. sorry. also, this was an anon request that i wanted to do longer (and might be a series)
living away from your parents bcs of college was normal. what (didn't) irritate you are your two annoying step brothers, hyuck and jaemin, who constantly visit you. and by constantly, this means everyday and sleepovers during the weekend. you always say they bother you but it actually gives you company. living alone can be scary for young women like you. 
one morning, you bent down to grab your bowl in the lower cabinet. what surprises you is the feeling of jaemin's hips meeting yours. you squeaked and gasped when he even pulled you closer to him. "good morning. having breakfast?" he asked innocently. 
"yeah, you want some?" you pushed him away gently. "sure. you'll make some for me?" you nod, taking two bowls instead of one. "how do you like to eat your oatmeal?" you finally turn around to see your step brother's face. 
"aren't you such a good girl?" you felt shivers run down your spine when he slid his finger down from your chin to your jaw. you didn't know why he was looking at you with such eyes. "huh?" 
"asking me what i like." this time, he trapped you in between him and the counter behind you. both his arms next to your hips and his head tilted. you blinked, feeling a weird hot tension. 
"i like mine with honey." you said with an awkward smile, trying to break the tension in between you two.
"sweet." he kisses your cheek. 
he does that all the time. so does your other step brother, donghyuck. you thought it was just a sweet gesture between step siblings but these days it felt different. 
jaemin finally left you alone so you could make him the breakfast you promised. but just few minutes after, donghyuck came along as he smacked your ass with no guilt whatsoever. "hey!" you frowned. "that's not very nice." you weren't sure why you felt embarrassed. siblings joke around like this all the time, right? including step siblings, right? 
donghyuck licked his lips before saying "you've no plans today?" he asked, looking at you in your pajamas still. he knew that if you had plans, you'd wash up before breakfast or sometimes you'd just grab breakfast outside. but you're here in the kitchen with no signs of going out. 
"it's a lazy day, i think." you shrugged. "how's this?" you scooped a little bit of your honey oatmeal to his face, asking him to have a taste. if only you knew that he couldn't care less about whatever the fuck you're cooking. so he pushed away your spoon. 
"wanna have plans with me?" 
"i said it's a lazy day." 
he rolled his eyes. "yeah, the plan is to have a lazy day together." 
"i don't mind but you know, if you're gonna stay here might as well-" 
"i'll be in your room." and there goes your hopes of having your brother to pay rent with you since they've been hanging around a lot with you. of course you love them but it's a capitalist world you live in. 
"jaemin, if you don't get here and eat your oatmeal, i'll put strawberries in it." 
-
"we can just watch movies?" hyuck suggested. "that's boring." jaemin pushed him slightly. "i can teach you guys how to crochet? or maybe cross stitch?" you smiled at your own suggestion.
"honey, it's a lazy day, remember?" hyuck looked at you. 
"fine, i'll just take a nap. you guys do whatever you want." you stomp your feet to your room, acting upset to your step brothers. 
"look what you did, you upset our baby sister!" jaemin complained. "shut up, let her sleep. she said we could do anything." donghyuck smirked, which made jaemin immediately understand his ideas. 
-
having a dream where both your step brothers grope you in your sleep shouldn't feel that good. waking up with wet panties with no one by the side of your bed shouldn't feel this lonely. is lonely even the word you're looking for? 
you wonder if it's a bad thing that you want to touch yourself to the thought of those two. you've never touched yourself for someone in real life. it's always fictional men that make you feel this way. so why is it that your brothers are the ones you thirst for at the moment? 
riding your pillow with nothing but your undergarments on while thinking of hyuck's fingers that touched you in your dreams. the kisses that jaemin gave you on your stomach, your breast. thinking that your step brothers had leave your apartment, you let out loud moans, calling out their names. 
you felt your body jump when suddenly your bedroom door opened with jaemin and donghyuck. you don't know if it's a good or a bad thing that donghyuck literally had his dick out, jerking himself off. you blinked in confusion. 
"i thought you left." you said. 
"when our baby is this sexually frustrated? of course not." jaemin held your chin up so you'd look at him. embarrassment was the only thing you felt at the moment. you probably looked like a disgusting whore to your brothers. 
they loved it. 
"want us to help you, baby?" though you were ashamed, you couldn't help but say "please." 
"up, now." you sat up so jaemin could remove the pillow you were riding. he sees the wet patch on it and on your panties. "dirty girl." he smirked. "i gotta clean you up. lay down for me, pretty." you obliged. 
as your head fell on your pillow, you see donghyuck still jerking off on his dick. it made your mouth water. his cock looked so delicious to you. 
while you fantasized of giving hyuck a blowjob, jaemin had taken off your panties and gave your pussy a kiss. "you can move whenever you want, okay?" he said before finally devouring your nasty clit. with just the feeling of his lips there, you were already pulling his hair and moaning like a bitch. 
"fuck, you look like a cheap slut like that." you hear donghyuck said. "ride his fucking face, whore." you weren't even aware that you obeyed donghyuck's order. you moved your hips on jaemin's lips like they had their mind of their own. "wanna suck you.." you looked at your step brother who was degrading you. 
"oh, you really are a fucking whore." hyuck was nowhere gentle with you. he pushed your face down into your pillows as he climbed on your bed, kneeling in front of your face before giving you what you thirsted for. 
in just a few seconds, hyuck was already thrusting his cock into your throat. "that's right. since i made you cum in your sleep you gotta make me cum in your mouth, got it?" and when he said that, you couldn't help but smile.
so what happened before wasn't a dream? they really did touch you while you were asleep. or could this situation still be in your dream. 
"so fucking sexy. you look so sexy smiling with my cock in your mouth. of course i gotta reward you with my cum, right? wanna swallow my cum, huh? you dirty slut?"
before you could nod, you felt jaemin's dick enter you hole that he made out with earlier. and suddenly everything felt so good. you were practically in heaven. you couldn't believe that you questioned your morals while you masturbated earlier. who cares about morals when you could have big dicks inside you? 
"her real reward is my cum in her womb. gonna make sure she gets pregnant today." jaemin said as he thrusted into you harshly. "my good girl. always obeying me. always make me feel good." your head went dizzy with the praising from jaemin and degradation from donghyuck. "you're squeezing me so tight, baby. that feel good?" jaemin's balls hitting your cunt felt like the thing that has been missing in your life. you finally understood the tension you felt from earlier this morning.
you wanted to have sex with your step brothers. 
"gonna cum." hyuck grunts, still thrusting at your mouth. "gonna cum and you're gonna swallow, alright? be the fucking whore that you are." donghyuck holds your face on his last thrust, keeping it steady like that so he could cum deep in your throat. he sighed once he released his hot liquid and pulled out. "what are you?" he strokes your hair. 
"lee donghyuck's cumslut." your answer gave you a kiss from your step brother where he could even taste his cum on your lips. you then smiled happily before you continued to moan from the feeling of jaemin's cock throbbing inside you. 
the moans went louder as his hips went faster. it didn't help that donghyuck was now sucking on your bouncing tits. 
"fuck fuck fuck, need to fill this hole up." jaemin groaned as you felt him pour his cum into your pussy. it was no surprise that you loved every feeling of it. 
as jaemin pulled away and went to the bathroom, hyuck stayed right there with you, still sucking on your boobs.
"dude, i'm going home." the both of you hear jaemin half yell from outside of your room. 
"yeah, you go do that. i'll have fun with my little fucktoy." donghyuck intertwined his fingers with yours, adjusting his position so his dick meets your pussy.
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james-is-here · 5 months
Text
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Part one
Sections: Joining Ateez, Chan sees you've debuted again, Growing closer to Seonghwa, You plague Chan's feed, What happened after the end of Pt. 1/ You talk to Skz
Blogs: @heartbinn | @leezanetheofficial @belladonna6-6-6 @aygotnobitches who suggested some ideas to me which helped me make this.
Tags: Angst, fluff, Mn and SKZ make up, mention of a Sasaeng, Mn gets cut, idk what else to put here, Skz are like super regretful for what they did, Chan finds out your taken?, Seonghwa is protective over you in the airport part. That's all, i think.
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(Joining Ateez)
Awkwardly shuffling on your feet, you eyes darting everywhere as you wait. A few weird glances were thrown at you. Did you wear something bad? Just converse, baggy jeans, and a light blue hoodie, a beanie also fit snug on your head.
You haven't felt this nervous since...since Chan brought you to meet the other boys he picked.
"Mn?" Looking to your left, you were expecting your new manager but instead were met with Hongjoong. "O-Oh, h-hi. I thought...I'm sorry." "It's okay. He ended up having to take care of something but I hope it's okay that I'm here instead to help you." "Of course it's okay, I-I'm just...a bit nervous. I...I haven't felt this way in a while." You kept it simple, didn't want to give too much information.
"Real quick, um, I wasn't told anything. Was just told that you'd be in the lobby." "I'm debuting aga- debuting with a group called Ateez, i think that's the name." "Yeah, it is! I'm the leader. Come on, I can introduce you to the others." "Wait, um, the last group I was in...well, they began excluding me, actually. Y-You seem really nice I just might take awhile to adjust." "That's okay." He smiled at you, it was so nice and genuine that you couldn't help but smile back and continue walking.
Meeting them was awkward and your aura must've been unwelcoming as Hongjoong introduced you, you could see the others were unsure but Hongjoong rested a hand gently on your arm and gave a little nod. You relax, exhaling slowly after taking a deep breath. "Sorry...I-I didn't mean to make any of you uncomfortable. I just left a...bad environment and I'm still adjusting. I'm really sorry." You bow deeply before standing up again.
"Let's do some ice breakers, yeah?" Hongjoong suggested and you nod as the others vocalized.
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(Chan finds out you debuted again.)
He and the boys were crushed that you left. The sunshine twins wouldn't leave your room and Chan had found your cut outs in the trash and taped everything back up.
He was the one to call you the most, second was Jisung. He also texted you, 'Mn-ie <3' staring back at him every time he does. How could he never realize what they were doing to him? How could they not have noticed Mn wasn't included?
He sighs, the disconnected voicemail playing for the umpteenth time and he ends the attempted call. As per usual, he goes to any social media app in order to see if anything about you has been posted.
After months of finding nothing, he finally came upon a picture of you, a solo photo of yourself surrounded by a few blurbs and reading over it Chan noticed it was little details about yourself. Name, birthday, age, favorite hobby. It was a 'get to know me' photo. Swiping to the next photo, it was you in the middle of a group of boys, they were doing jazz hands around you as you smiled sheepishly. Reading the caption was like a knife twisted in his chest, he had found a group. What hurts Chan is how much happier he looks, he use to be that happy with them but they pushed him away, he doesn't even know why they did.
"Hyung? What's wrong?" He looks up to see Changbin in front of him. He lifts his phone lazily and the younger sighs. "You know calling him is futile." "No, not that..." He reaches out, handing his phone to Changbin who takes it, a moment later he's sitting on Chan's bed with a sigh and setting the phone down. "H-How could we have been so...blind? Why...Why did we push him away? That wasn't fair to him." "I ask myself the same thing, Bin." "Do you want to tell the others?" "Maybe. I know they've been trying to get updates out of manager-nim about Mn but...yeah, no, let's tell them."
Later that day, Chan told the rest of them about Mn and some were upset but some others were glad that after what they did to him, at least he found a better environment. All of them were beating themselves up. They all agreed that what they did was wrong but now...they can't get him back.
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(Growing closer to Seonghwa)
You remember it clearly, the moment where Seonghwa gave you the same comfort someone else use to give.
It had been a year since you had joined Ateez, you felt so much more happy, less of a burden and more of an actual member of a group. All of them were protective over you after learning more about you. They would say you're a precious soul that needs protected at all costs.
All costs...even if it risks their safety.
You were walking with them through an airport, attached to Wooyoung the whole time but he didn't mind. Readjusting your jacket, you notice a lack of weight in your pocket and turn around, noticing your wallet now a few steps from where you just came from. You must've missed your pocket after putting something back.
You say a quick 'wait' to the boys around you and you jog over to your wallet, picking it up but another hand grabs it then suddenly a butterfly knife is pointed at you. "Woah-" "Why do you leave?!" A sasaeng, you just stared at her, you literally panic and every possible thought you could've had left as she advanced.
It felt like ages but it was really five seconds that so much unfolded. She lunged forward, blade catching your cheek at the same time Seonghwa was the first to reach you and pull you away. Security restraining the girl and taking your wallet from her.
Seonghwa walked backwards, taking you away from her as his arms squeezed around you when he heard you let out a small cry. One hand moves to the back of your neck, keeping you in the crook of his neck as he watches them take the girl away, hand squeezing your nape slightly before brushing through your hair, soothing you and helping you calm down.
Hongjoong was next to you guys shortly after Seonghwa grabbed you. "Shh, it's okay, Mn. She's gone." He whispered before reaching under the older males chin and thumbing at your cheek under the shallow cut. "Oh, Mn." He backs away, it wasn't deep, no blood, but it still looked bad.
"Come on, Mnie." You couldn't help but finally move your arms and hug Seonghwa tightly. You haven't heard that nickname in ages and hearing it from someone who sees you, it comforted you so much that you couldn't help the new wave of tears that fell but quickly pulled back and wiped under your eye as the tears stung the cut. Seonghwa's hand replaces yours, helping you wipe your tears and while you feel appreciated and cared for, Seonghwa is fighting himself internally as he found you the sweetest thing ever and officially doesn't like seeing you cry.
"I like Mn-ie..." "You do? Then I'll keep using it. That okay?" You nod softly, finally smiling at Seonghwa. He giggles softly, ruffling up your hair gently before giving a small head pat and guiding you away with Hongjoong on your other side.
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(You plague Chan's feed)
Two years since learning about your re-debut, he's seen you everywhere.
Clips of your fan cams, pictures of your outfits, screenshots fans have taken from videos. He didn't stop himself from watching the videos or looking a photos for a moment longer than needed.
He refreshed the twitter feed and the top tweet was an Ateez Update fan page. Even fan pages are plaguing his feed.
There was a link, posted 20 minutes ago.
'Nn live featuring Seonghwa and Wooyoung'
He opened the link and it took him to the live. It looked like you were in your bed, knees pulled up as you talked to Wooyoung about something but all he could pay attention to was your looks. He still finds you adorable. He can't help but sit up in his bed, pulling his knees up as well and taking his pillow to hug as he watched you. You looked...happy. The familiar sting began in his eyes as you leaned back into Wooyoung, the boy wrapping his arms around your neck and pulling you back as Seonghwa started to tell a story.
He thought you two were cute together but a soft gasp and his lips part when you stare at the other male across from you. That glint, that shine. He knows that look and he chokes out a sob. You can't be gone. You still love him, right? You haven't moved on just yet, right?
He leaves his phone at his feet as he leans back, regret eating at him as he cries into his pillow. Minho came in moments later and saw Chan asleep but his phone still playing. He picked up the phone, sighing softly when he sees your face and your smile before turning it off and putting it to the side, moving to cover his hyung up and he leaves with one more look to Chan before he's out the door.
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(The award ceremony, Chan POV then it switches to your POV)
Watching you kiss Seonghwa was like getting the air punched out of him with a bus.
The choked sob he let out was pathetic but he didn't care. He saw someone he loved disappear from right in front of him all over again. How could he take you for granted? If he just noticed the neglect sooner, you'd still be there with him, with the boys.
A hand is placed on his shoulder, he looks over to see Felix who sighs. "Chan..." He sniffs but it's futile as another sob escapes him and he just lets the tears fall. "A-After this long I-I still m-miss him. I-I still thought I c-could get him back..." Felix pulls him into a hug, letting him crying into his shoulder for a moment.
"Hyung...it's been seven years..." "Don't you think I know that?!" He snapped quietly but still let Felix attempt to fix his makeup. "I-I know...that it's b-been seven years...b-but he was...he was my f-first boyfriend, I loved him and it's hurting me because I still regret not seeing the neglect sooner. How could I, his fucking leader, not realize he was missing from practices or meetings. How could I be so blind?" "Hyung, we're at fault too." "Yeah, but I'm the main one that should've seen it. I-I'm the...the leader, I...I should've seen it..." His voice gradually became a whisper.
"Channie-Hyung..." Inhaling softly, he lifts his head, spinning around to come face to face with you and Seonghwa.
(POV Change)
As Seonghwa led you back, you realized that you just walked away. You didn't acknowledge them, you didn't wave back but do you have to? Last you checked, they didn't care about you but you still stopped in your tracks, zoned out for a moment as the male holding your hand tried to bring you back.
"Hey, Mn-ie, come back to me. You okay?" "Stray Kids is who hurt me...Th-They were the ones to- to shove me away and ignore me and neglect me." "Oh, Mn..." "I-I'm sorry I didn't t-tell any of you sooner, I just-" You bit your lip, willing yourself to not cry but seeing them after so long seemed to have brought the pain back. You could see the hope in Chan's eyes before you turned away and you found it unbelievable because even he was neglecting you but you also...felt bad?
"Hey, don't cry, it's okay." "I-I don't know why I feel guilty, Hwa. I-I shouldn't be feeling guilty and yet..." You take a deep breath, wiping your tears away carefully. "Maybe you should forgive them?" "Why should I do that? I was chosen to be in this group but then they were pushing me away and forgetting me. What was the point of adding me if I was to be forgotten?" "Mn-ie, they regret it. I could see it on their faces as I came to get you and they called out for you. They want you back, at least as a friend."
"But they-" "Mn...You know what else I can see?" "What?" You sniff. "You want your friends back." Seonghwa smiled at you gently, he knows you miss them deep down and thinking about it, you're still hurt from what they did to you but you do want them back. "Come on, Mn. You miss them and they've been missing you. I just know it."
With a sigh, you nod and Seonghwa takes you back to them. When you get there, you see Chan in Felix's arms. "I...I should've seen it..." You hear him mutter, stepping closer, the other boys have seen you returned and you speak up. "Channie-Hyung..." He turns towards you, staring at you, stunned that you came back and you have tear stains on your cheek.
You glance at Seonghwa who nods gently which just barely convinced you to step closer to the others. They watch your every step, waiting for what you're gonna do or say.
Smiling awkwardly, you reach out your hand, gesturing to Chan when all he did was stare at it before he took it. You pull him towards you, wrapping your arms around him in a hug. A small gasp leaves Chan as he stands there, arms hesitating around you and you laugh. "You can hug back, you know?" It was instant, his arms tight around you and his face buried in your shoulder. "We're sorry, Mn...I-I'm sorry." He cried and you rub his back.
"Hyung?" You look over to Felix on your left. He's as tall as you now and he looks even more precious, if that's even possible. "C'mere." You extend the arm around Chan's back out to him and he hugs you as well.
When Felix and Chan finally pull away, another member is suddenly wrapping his arms around your middle. Looking down, you laugh softly while wrapping your arms around Jisung. You also hug Hyunjin and Jeongin.
"We really are sorry, Mn." "I know...but what you did wasn't nice..." They nod, lowering their heads. "but I think after this long...I can sort of forgive you..." They looked like a deer in headlights making you giggle. "We can be friends again. I miss you guys." They smile, Felix hugs you again before stepping back and you turn to Chan.
You take a look towards Seonghwa and he nods. You don't even have to say anything and it honestly shocks you how well he can read you.
"Channie?" He looks up, his hands wringing together. You think you've never seen him looking so nervous. "Come here." He steps up to you and you take his hands into yours. "I know that I left abruptly...and didn't talk to you before leaving but you know why, correct?" He nods his head, his eyes still downcast. "I can see that you had some hope but I'm with Seonghwa..." He nods again and you can see tears welling up in his eyes again. " We can be friends though..." You smile. "Is that okay?" His eyes finally meet yours, smiling a bit. "Yeah, th-that's fine. I-I did have hope but honestly the most I wanted was just to have you back with us. I-It felt so...weird without you even after so long. I missed you...but I'm really glad you found someone else...we were terrible to you- I was terrible to you."
"Channie, your rambling." "S-sorry." He laughs before gasping and staring at you, glancing to Seonghwa then back at you. You kissed his cheek but the look in your eye was forgiving and he hugged you again. "But do anything dumb like that again and I'm gone." They knew you were half joking, there was a smile on your face and they laughed.
"Hyung, we gotta go fix your make up before going on stage." "Right, sorry for keeping you for so long." "You're fine, Mn. It's good to have you back." "You can't take me away though, you'd have to fight him and Wooyoung." "What do you mean?" Hyunjin asks and all you do is wink before stepping back to Seonghwa and leaving for your table again. "See you guys later."
There's still apart of you that never wanted to do that but Seonghwa made a point later that what you did was a good thing. You've had a grudge for seven years and he saw how regretful they looked. You agreed that it was time to let it go only with some hesitance.
But you realized in the passing days that they made up for it. If you had similar off days they would invite you out, they talked to you more whether it be nonsense or what they did that week. Jisung and Wooyoung jokingly fought for you. Han has made a couple comments about stealing you from Ateez and the fans found the joke fighting adorable.
When Stay noticed that the boys looked happier, lighter, of course the detective Stays did their digging and the most they found was a few pictures of you with a couple of the boys you've posted either at public events or pictures you've taken during outings you've had with the boys.
It doesn't matter though, all they care about is that you've seemed to have made up with Stray Kids --even though all they knew about your departure was that it was mental health issues-- and they're happy to see you with them again.
199 notes · View notes
binsito · 1 year
Text
tired
pairing: lee felix x fem reader
genre: bff!felix, pining, angst
word count: 2.4k
rating: mature, includes: unprotected sex, mentions of fingering and f receiving oral, it's pretty vanilla just kinda angsty, petnames like "baby", "pretty boy", and "princess" are used, felix is ur bff that's in love with you and you have horrible dating experiences with shitty people
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felix was tired of having to wipe your tears.
was tired of having to listen to you talk in extensive detail over how shitty the guys you've dated have been.
how they hurt you, how they toss you aside and make you feel little.
was tired of having to pick up the pieces of your broken heart, patching them back into place only for you to go and get it torn right out of your chest all over again.
he was absolutely sick of it.
but most of all he was sick of you telling him how your lovers always fell short.
how the sex was mediocre, how they left you high and dry, chasing their own pleasure and leaving you hanging - utterly unfulfilled and upset.
he was sick of you telling him how many orgasms you've faked, how many times you've lied about how big their cock was in hopes that maybe that would push them to fuck you harder.
how they never knew where your clit was, always rubbing the skin next to it painfully hard or rubbing your folds - never where you needed them the most.
felix would never do you like that.
he wouldn't dream of giving you frustrating, god awful, pathetic sex.
felix wanted nothing more than to pull orgasm after orgasm from you, lapping your sweet cream with his tongue, dying to taste you, to have you shake under him.
he wanted to let you use him, he wanted to be a toy for you, for you to mount him and get off on him. he wanted to be good for you, to take whatever you gave him, to have you cum around his cock while he looked up at you with bleary eyes.
was that too much to ask for?
it was all he ever wanted..
he would never hurt you, would never leave you, would never make you feel worthless.
he wanted you to be his princess, he wanted you to only look at him and not those lazy excuses of a partner.
but he was just your best friend.
and you would never look at him that way.
"thank you for picking me up lix.." you said softly, breaking him out of his thoughts
you had called him to come pick you up from some guy's house, felix already knew that the guy had disappointed you in one way or another but he didn't say anything.
this was routine.
"i-i'm sorry for calling you so late.. he just didn't seem like he wanted me to stay the night so.. i felt weird asking if i could.." he just nodded, not wanting to say anything for fear of saying something brash.
"is it.. alright if you just take me back to yours? i would feel so bad if you drove all the way back to my apartment.." "s'fine yeah? you know i'd never say no to you.." he mumbled
and that was true.
he was physically incapable of telling you no, no matter how hard he tried. you could ask him to wrestle a bear for you and he would do it, no questions asked.
the rest of the ride back to his place was quiet, he didn't even bother turning the radio on. he just wanted to lay in bed, hoping you would spare him the details of your encounter because he feared he would go ballistic, could potentially show up at that guys place and fuck him up if he had done anything to you.
you took the right side of the bed, that was your spot. felix was very particular about what side was whose, you always thought it was funny. you didn't care much for sides, especially if you were drunk or super exhausted, any side was a good side.
he laid there, back towards you while you stared up at the ceiling. he could tell you were going to have trouble sleeping tonight. you barely slept if you had a mind full of racing thoughts. normally he would curl up into your sides or have you fall asleep on his chest but he was also spent.
tired.
tired of the constant back and forth. of always being the one waiting for you at the end of the tunnel.
tired of having to be strong for you, so you had someone to lean on when things went to shit.
"i-is there.. something wrong with me?"
oh god.
he could hear the tears in your voice.
shit.
"what? no, fuck no." he's quick to answer. "why would there be anything wrong with you?.." "then why does this always happen?.."
"because shitty guys tend to take advantage of sweet and beautiful girls like you.."
"i-im not-" "yes, you are.. you're the prettiest girl i know and trust me, i fucking hate seeing you like this.." his voice was soft yet stern, hoping the words would stick with you.
you were pretty.
prettier than any flower he's every picked, prettier than any sunset he's ever seen, prettier than any star he's ever counted.
and he's counted a lot.
trying hard to find you in a galaxy far away but never coming close.
always just too out of reach.
maybe he'd be a little more lucky in a different lifetime.
"i-i'm sorry lix.. i must be so annoying.. always asking you for help whenever i do something stupid.." "i love you.. that's what i'm here for.." he loved you.
his body was screaming for you to realize the weight of his words.
i love you, i love you, i love you!
"i love you too lix.."
but not in the way i love you, right?
of course not.
you both fall quiet but the room felt so loud, so unbearably loud. like the walls were laughing at you both, pointing and mocking.
felix shut his eyes, not wanting to feel anything anymore and hoping to fall asleep right away.
he was hoping you'd follow suit, that you would just go to bed after this and you two could carry on like you always did.
"i just wish i could find someone like you.. i wish i could just date you instead of wasting my time over and over again.."
felix wished you never said that.
that you had just let this go and had just gone to bed.
and part of him was so angry because couldn't you see how hard he tried for you? how incredibly lovesick he was?
"you should just go to bed." he spoke, not meaning to sound so cold. you obviously picked up on his tone.
"lix i'm sorry that was weird right?-"
"no, but it pissed me off because yeah.. wouldn't it have saved you all the trouble if you just dated me?" "lixie i didn't mean to-" "didn't mean to upset me, i get it. but i'm gonna be upset regardless because i've been going through this with you for far too long and i am just so.. fucking.. tired.
when i say i love you, i'm not just saying it because i feel like it or because you're my best friend.. i'm saying it because i fucking love you and i'm dying for you to just pick me for once.."
you felt so little at this moment.
so, so stupid.
the crazy thing was, you knew how he felt but you always just pushed it aside as nothing. that maybe you were reading into the way he liked holding your hand too much. that you were crazy to ever think your best friend could feel something more for you than just platonic friendship.
you opened your mouth to speak but ultimately fell silent.
how would you even answer? what could you even possibly say?
he figured he fucked up, about to turn away again and pretend he didn't just say the craziest shit ever. god, he wished he could just vanish.
"lix.. please don't be mad at me.. i-i'm sorry.."
if there was something you hated more than the guys you've slept with, it's feeling like you hurt felix.
"just stop apologizing please-"
"no.. you can't just say you love me and then try pushing me away.." you spoke, trying to keep your voice from faltering or sounding weak.
"i don't want to complicate things.."
"but you already did, felix."
he decided it would be best if he just slept on the couch tonight, sitting up and scooting towards the edge of the bed. your hand quickly coming over to grab his arm
"felix, please. don't leave.. we both need to stop being reckless.. you can't keep hiding your feelings and i can't keep making bad choices.. it's so bad for us." you spoke softly, your touch burning through him.
he couldn't resist you, he always sought out your warmth and soft skin.
"wouldn't dating your best friend be a bad choice?"
you couldn't help but let out a soft laugh at that.
"no.. because i know you're a good person.. you've been patient with me and i know that this might be the only good choice i'll ever make."
now he was the one trying to find words and failing to come up with a response.
but there didn't need to be any more words exchanged, you tugged him towards you and placed a soft kiss on his lips.
both of your hearts thumping nervously in your chest. it felt different but right. it was like learning to swim, you were afraid of drowning but felix was there to hold you up, kissing you back once he realized he didn't give a fuck anymore.
he loved you and he wasn't going to miss an opportunity to show you that he could love you just as you deserved.
--
it felt like the whole world was fast asleep while the two of you hastily took your clothes off. all of it strewn on the floor, bodies bare, radiating heat and harboring so many new feelings.
felix lived alone so there was no need for you to be as quiet as you were but it almost felt better this way.
you couldn't quite remember how it had escalated to this point.
maybe it was when felix let out a needy whimper against your lips or when you pulled him in close by his hair. he was so pliant, so ready to give.
you both knew you wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight anyways, so once it had gotten to this point, you both welcomed it.
"lix it's okay.." you whispered, you could see him contemplating going any further, like he was guilty about doing this.
you cupped his face and kissed his forehead softly
"i trust you..it's okay lixie.."
you trust him.
his heart felt like it could burst.
you trust him.
you trust him enough to let him have you like this, to make you feel good, to treat you well.
he wasn't going to disappoint.
he didn't care if he got to finish after this or not, his one goal in mind is to finally do all the things he'd dreamt of doing to you.
he was more worried about making sure you'd cum and were left satisfied. he let you know in advanced that he wasn't one to get embarrassed if you guided his hand or told him how to touch. he wanted to know, was eager to learn what made your toes curl.
two fingers deep inside you while his pretty lips worked diligently on your clit. your breathy moans would be engraved in his memory after this.
"oh god.. lixie.. just like that baby.." hands tangled in his long hair.
baby.
it's like you knew exactly what to say to make him crazy.
"shit.. lixie.. can't anymore.. gotta have you.." you sighed out, eyes shut tightly, your stomach coiling at the arising orgasm he was pulling from you. he pulled back and looked down at your cunt, it was basically screaming his name, fluttering around nothing, begging him to just finally breach your hole and make it his.
you wanted to cum on him, wanted to have him inside and hold him close.
he knew he was a dead man as soon as he lined up and pressed in, holding your hands gently and letting out a relieved exhale. it felt so much better than he had ever imagined, sucking him in like your cunt was made for him.
"g-god i'm not sure i'll last very long.." he chuckled
you smiled up at him and he kissed you just as he started to move gently, pacing himself in hopes of drawing this out as long as he could but in all honesty, he was dying to rut into you with all the force he could muster.
your arms wrapping around him as his forehead pressed against yours.
it was perfect.
he was perfect.
gentle and sweet, asking you if you were alright, telling you how much he loved you, how good you were taking his cock.
you could get used to this.
making love with felix.
you hated yourself for how long it took you to get here, how many heartaches and horrible exes you went through only to fall back into felix's arms time and time again.
this time you hoped to stay.
"i'm close lixie.. right there.." you whimpered, legs coming around his hips to cage him in.
he kept hitting your spot, pushing you to your peak, intensity bubbling in your tummy until it was just too much - snapping within you, your orgasm taking over all your senses.
felix cooed and sweet talked you through it, helping you ride it out as he let himself go as well, filling you with his own cum.
post nut clarity hitting him because he was so fucking worried this would ruin everything he's ever known.
he'd rather throw himself into ongoing traffic than to lose you, his best friend.
"lix.." you grabbed his face
"pretty boy.. you need to stop worrying so much.." pecking his lips gently to bring his attention back towards you.
"i promise i wanna try this with you.. i really do.. i want us to both be happy together.." he nodded and laid down on your chest, holding you close and shutting his eyes.
"i'll make you happy.. i won't let you cry anymore. i waited so long for you, princess.."
you smiled softly to yourself, playing with his hair and massaging his scalp.
you knew things would be alright for a change.
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