#also. g-ddamn

[emiliosandozsequence]

say what you will about booktokers, but at least they don't have that air of superiority (for the most part) that booktubers have

[therevengeoffrankenstein]

sometimes i feel so crazy knowing all the side characters' and background characters' names.

[themildestofwriters]

I'll never understand Tamlin antis who are so tied up in their hate for him they just straight up refuse to acknowledge one of the big twists of ACOWAR when interpreting his actions *during* ACOWAR.

Like, I'm not saying you have to like the guy, but G-ddamn. It's almost wilful ignorance how they ignore the fact that he was a double agent the whole bloody time.

There's also the fact that, quite clearly, in Feyre's narration no less, his motivations are further explained as an intense drive to protect his people from Hybern. Like, why are so many people caught up on the whole "He whipped his sentry!" thing when you have Feyre right there telling us that the only reason he did it was to prevent Hybern from thinking he was weak and therefore it would be better to conquer Spring rather than simply ally with it.

The book outright tells you why he whipped his sentry and yet this idea perseveres that Tamlin... what? Couldn't handle being questioned? I don't understand. The book tells us why he did it. Why are we still making up reasons for why he did it?

Tamlin is wearing a mask in ACOWAR. He needs to pretend to be a leal hound of Hybern's order. He can't do that, however, if he is constantly taking issue with everything Hybern does or wants him to do. If he wants to maintain his alliance, he needs to show himself to be strong in the way Hybern views strength. If he wants to be a double agent, he needs to earn their trust. He can't do either of those things if he's constantly fighting over tortured mortals and accused sentries.

It doesn't help that half the trouble Tamlin is having maintaining this mask is directly caused by Feyre putting him in situations where he must choose between the alliance and his status as double agent or doing the right thing in that moment. He wouldn't have had to whip the sentry if Feyre hadn't let Ianthe steal the keys (and, yes, Feyre *let* Ianthe do that, because she watched the whole thing happened and could have intervened at any time), and had Feyre not provoked Ianthe by committing Divine Fraud.

For as much as Feyre says she wishes she could have prevented the whole thing, she's lying to the sentries and she's lying to herself, because the sentry was whipped because that's what Feyre wanted. She wanted to destroy Tamlin's relationship with his sentries and this whole situation was all but set up by her for that purpose. Feyre gets to act like the champion for arguing against injustice — an injustice she let happen and provoked for her own ambitions — while Tamlin is condemned because whipping the sentry is the only way to protect his people from a worse fate, and the only way to continue his role as double agent (which played a major role in the downfall of Hybern itself).

I don't know. For people who seem to like the series so much, they seem awfully keen on just ignoring whole swaths of context so they can make up reasons to hate a fictional character. It's really annoying to, because they can't just be quiet about their fanfiction. They gotta bring it up everywhere, even in serious discussion about the series, and they'll insult you for your takes solely because Tamlin is "abusive," as if that changes anything.

[paperstorm]

Why the f*ck would you rate that E for everyone?!

My g*ddamned child read that because I thought it was safe according to the E rating. What the f*ck is wrong with you? I'm so angry right now, it's unbelievable.

I don’t have any idea what story you are referring to but in the world of fan fiction, E stands for “Explicit”, beloved. The ratings are explained very clearly on AO3 and are also marked plainly on every single story:

I’m sorry your child doesn’t have a parent who cares to do 15 seconds of research before they expose them to clearly marked adult material.

[ivan-fyodorovich-k]

Washington, Washington Six foot eight, weighs a fucking ton Opponents beware, opponents beware, He’s coming he’s coming he’s coming   Let me lay it on the line, he had two on the vine I mean two sets of testicles, so divine On a horse made of crystal he patrolled the land With a Mason ring and Schnauzer in his perfect hands   Here comes George, in control Women dug his snuff and his gallant stroll Ate opponents’ brains And invented cocaine He’s coming he’s coming he’s coming

Washington, Washington, Six foot twenty fucking killing for fun Spread, spread, Delaware He’s coming he’s coming he’s coming   Sue me if I go too fast but the sons of his opponents wish that he was their dad Got a wig for his wig got a brain for his heart He’ll kick you apart! He’ll kick you apart! Oooh!   He’ll save children, but not the British children He’ll save children, but not the British children He’ll save children, but not the British children He’ll save children, but not the British children   He had a pocket full of horses, fucked the shit out of bears Threw a knife into heaven and could kill with a stare He made love like an eagle falling out of the sky Killed his sensei in a duel and he never said why   Washington, Washington Twelve stories high, made of radiation The present beware, the future beware He’s coming, he’s coming, he’s coming   Did I mention his four nuts? Well he also had four dicks

If you took off his boot you could see the dicks growing off his feet

I heard that motherfucker had, like   …thirty g*ddamn dicks   He once held an opponent’s wife’s hand in a… jar of acid. .   ..   ...at a party

[crispy-dib]

PROJECT PATCHWORK #4/ MAJOR UPDATE PART 2:

“Sinyala’s Happy Family”

Previous - Next

(Long as hell post lmao - get ready to read!)

Eli, incredibly cautiously, makes his way over to Phyllis, trembling with every step, searching intensely for any signs of aggression.

But from Mother there was none. The goose simply looked perpetually angry.

Eventually, Eli embraces Phyllis, his head resting against her chest.

“Ahh, come on! Y’gonna give him some sugar and not even give ME a taste?!” Franco yells, balling his fists together and stomping like a g-ddamn cartoon.

Phyllis turns to Franco with what appeared to be her version of a scowl.

“Naughty boys like YOU have to earn Mother’s time!” She scolds.

There’s a short pause, then Doctor Futterman speaks:

“Besides, he’s also been brushing. Look at his teeths!”

Another short pause.

Phyllis lifts up Eli’s chin, inspecting both the teeth on his mask and his actual teeth.

While damaged, they were shockingly white.

“Why, you’re right, Doctor Daddy! Like pearls they are…” Phyllis trails.

She gently offers her hand, and she walks Eli to a sink, treating his reopened wounds.

On the other side of the screens, Dr. Easterman lights a cigarette, offering one to his associate, who declines.

“Are we celebrating or mourning?” She asks.

“Celebrating - normally I’d offer you a drink, but I think you have to be sober to enjoy this.” Easterman replies with a grin.

“Why are we allowing this?” She asks, her skepticism making Hendrick scoff and shake his head.

He squints for a moment.

“What do you think is a problem?” He almost accuses.

“Why are we letting Futterman nurture Elliot…isn’t the whole part of this therapy to break them?”

“Because the family is growing.” He takes a drag on his cigarette for a moment, exhaling smoothly.

“So we have Mother, Father, Baby, and…?”

“Grandmother.”

“…Really?”

Hendrick nods.

“Patchwork’s a remarkable case - one that’s sure to raise our innocent baby into a true gentleman.”

“This is about Reagent deaths.”

“Precisely. With someone almost constantly with Baby, we can ensure that he grows into what we need. It will work…the therapies just take time.”

“What if it doesn’t?”

“We cannot afford it to fail. Not now.”

Hendrick takes another drag.

“Not ever.”

His attention was immediately turned to the cameras, as he hears a soft whimper.

“Mm…mama…” Eli trembles.

“That is what I’ve been waiting for.” Hendrick says.

“You’re breakin’ my fuckin’ balls here!” Franco complains.

“Oh shut up ya whiny brat!” Dr. Futterman growls.

“Hey, you want my shit?!” Franco threatens.

“Enough!!” Phyllis scolds. “There is a child present!”

“My ass! Dat’s a tall glass a’ watah…” Franco smirks, not even subtly checking Eli out.

Eli’s face immediately reflects disgust, looking at Franco up and down with a scowl. Well, at least that was something he was used to.

“Tell me dear, what do you like to wear? These clothes are filthy! You need something nice,” Phyllis asks.

“…Pants would be nice…”

“SO HE CAN TALK?” Franco exclaims.

It’s met with a glare.

“Come along then, little gosling! Mother knows where to go!” Phyllis giggles.

Eli takes her hand and they walk out of the sleep room.

“Tell them to release Coyle into the trial Gooseberry and Patchwork are entering. Mother needs to meet Baby’s father.”

[ghoulhusband]

ok bear with me here: an idea i’ve been kicking around is benny maybe not falling in love with per se, but romanticizing an idea of the courier after they die because he reads their diary/journal/pipboy. i think it’d be kind of a benny thing to do to find out he had a lot in common with someone he killed and instead of actually taking responsibility or feeling guilty about it he kinda turns them into a victim of the cause where he keeps imagining them as the first person to actually believe in what he’s doing, tell him he’s the man, etc. where like this version of them understands why he killed them and forgives him and is like ‘if it weren’t for house—who’s fault this so clearly is—we could be together and i’d back you up’ so there’s an additional what in the g-ddamn element to them being alive where they’re obviously not the person he imagined in his head but also despite his own personal fantasies benny’s still not the kind of guy who’d trust anyone with his plan or to have his back on this one. yay or nay

[sabrinahawthorne]

CLASH! Devlog, April 16, 2025 - Major System Change

I changed the core engine of CLASH!. Let's talk about it.

From the very inception of CLASH!, back when it was a free pdf with ripped Shonen Jump assets, A character's Stances have been composed of two parts: A Score and a pool of Tokens. The Score was mostly static, and really existed to tell you how many Tokens you got when you Focused that Stance. The Tokens themselves existed for two purposes: mind games and CLASH!es. When you made a Bid, you declared a number, the goal being to imply which Stance you planned to declare. The number you declared corresponded to some number of Tokens, which would be converted to dice in a pool when it came time to break the tie of a contest.

Reading that, you might think, "Hey, Sabrina? That's really fucking obtuse. I have to imagine that would be really unintuitive for new players, and would bog down a game being built for the express purpose of hype and excitement." And... yeah, exactly.

I recently played a oneshot on-mic for a podcast, and I'm embarassed to say it took until I played the game for the public - a year and a half into development - to spot the issue. And once I spotted it, it took a multi-hour conversation with my partner to accept that a change needed to be made. So here's what that looks like.

First things first - I've dropped Stance Tokens. They simply didn't do anything exciting. I'm loathe to remove such a wonderful doohickey (sorry Jeff), but the fact is that they only existed for CLASH!es, and not in a way that can't also be accomplished with the static Stance Score. As central as they felt to me, Tokens were just an extra number to juggle for no discernable reason. Don't worry, though! I'm keeping Potential Tokens - we aren't doohickey-hating animals.

Second - Contests are now a literal, actual game of rock-paper-scissors. G-ddamn no-brainer. It used to be that the declaration of Stances took place in turns, with some subsystems slapped on to give both participants some kind of advantage, so that the second player couldn't always just call a winning Stance. But folks - that wasn't friggin' exciting. The reason I'm so proud of the CLASH! is because it's a real-time tiebreaker that heightens the real tension in the room - I've played games where the outcome of a CLASH! cause actual cheering from the table. It rules! But the body of a Contest has never done that. They've been slow, clunky, and awkward, in no small part because players just... couldn't get their heads around the Token-centric system in place before hand. Because it was a bad system!

So now, Contests exist in three phases - the building of a hand of Techniques (which are their own topic for a later devlog), the turn-based playing of those Techs, and a game of RPS to see who kicks who's ass. I'm excited to see how it plays in future tests.

As of the writing of this post, I haven't yet released the 4th playtest booklet, where these changes will take place; I'm still implementing the change. But keep your eyes out! I hope to have it done soon (in the next week or two, fingers crossed), and I'll make that its own post when I upload the file.

Thanks for making it to the end of this... screed. If you want to know what the hell I'm talking about, I recommend you check out some earlier playtest booklets (version 3 or lower). And while you're on my itch, maybe support my surgery fundraiser!

[misskriemhilds]

suitcase arcanists driving someone to the airport list (2/?)

isolde can't drive. we meet her in a time period just around the time cars were starting to get big, and even then she gives me big passenger princess energy.

voyager (if the dear @maxdemianfangirl's verdict is anything to go off by) would accept your offer because it is the nice thing to do. but once you get into the car after she helps you pack (don't ask where she got the car. she probably borrowed it from another foundation member) she realizes that she does not know how to drive. if, however, she could drive, she would play the classical music station.

medicine pocket will not drive you to the airport. if you ask them about it, they'd go, "yeah, no :/" in the most firm, blunt manner you've ever seen.

tennant would drive you if you asked, but it's a bad idea. the flirting with you the moment you step into the car if you're a woman isn't the problem - i think if you're clearly not interested, she'd back off. she's a competent driver, and has good taste in music even though it's mostly 40s era oldies. the problem is she'll try to recruit you into a multi-level marketing scheme the entire g-ddamn car ride.

willow would not drive you to the airport unless you were caroline or flutterpage. if you were, she would grumble the entire packing process and then drive to the airport in silence.

liang yue is not old enough for a driver's license (at least in henan province? i checked) but she'd actually be a very pleasant passenger if she went with you to the airport - maybe she'd have a driver's permit, though (disclaimer: i don't know about how driver's permits work in china so if anyone can inform me that'd be just peachy). she'll politely ask if you can play her favorite chinese pop music on the radio as you drive, and is careful to remind you of the safety rules of the road. you are not going to start driving until you have your seatbelt on.

centurion will happily drive you both ways. it's a really easy trip that somehow takes a lot less time than you expected, and she blasts 30s spanish oldies used as tracks for tango dancing the whole time plus some jazz music thrown in. she's also a really great conversationalist and you're probably a little sad to have to leave her by the time you get to the airport because she's so fun to talk to.

dikke would drive you if you asked, but i think it's a bad idea. she probably somehow secured a driver's permit after some time spent learning, and she's one of those people who drives way too slowly out of fear of hitting the speed limit. due to being from the middle ages she probably doesn't even know you can play music in the car until you ask, "hey dikke, is it okay if we turn on some music?" and her favorite picks are gregorian choir chants. she does not talk the entire ride.

blonney might grumble at first about driving you to the airport, but eventually relents and goes, "ugh... fine." and then ends up driving you both there and back. she's actually a really great conversationalist in the realm of small talk and has a lot of astute observations to say (she is a diehard miss piggy stan if you decide to bring up the muppets as childhood nostalgia), but i hope you like madonna and other big pop names of the 80s as your background music for road trips because that's likely going to be the music you're listening to the whole time.

regulus would drive you if you asked, but it's a bad idea. she's not a chaotic driver per se but she's way too fast and probably breaks the speed limit. if you ask her to play music, she won't play anything other than 60s era oldies, and maybe buddy holly ("this pirate can at least recognize buddy holly's sheer talent - he's the reason why rock and roll as we know it exists, after all!")

[punctuation-completionist]

yknow if you're gonna be a silly joke blog you might need to be able to also take jokes. just a suggestion

sorry for answering asks when i said i wouldn't but also.

does telling someone to "go fuck themselves and fucking die" seem like a joke to you? or at the very least, if it's a joke, is it even in the least bit FUNNY? (since op was so concerned with only funny people adding onto their posts)

even if they don't sincerely want me dead, it's an unprompted thing to say to someone for saying that you have a g*ddamn colon on your post. especially when they clearly seem pissed at me for something that they said was a blockable thing. and then decided not to block me to tell me i should die. and then even AFTER i say, hey dude, if you don't want me reblogging these things, just tell me i can delete the rb it's whatever and then they don't even listen to that sentiment and continue to act as if i am persecuting them for saying that it is RUDE TO TELL PEOPLE TO DIE for just doing normal gimmick blog things

just a suggestion: learn what a joke is please. because me saying that it's rude to tell me to fucking die is not called not taking a joke, that's just called stating THE FUCKING OBVIOUS DUDE. i have taken plenty of jokes, i just don't consider that to be a joke really

if telling someone they should die for counting the punctuation on your posts causes amusement? good for you. that's kind of a dick move. and i really did not feel the intention behind that was to be funny. it was to be rude.

[therevengeoffrankenstein]

getting hardcore back into fob and seeing pete rocking long hair and skirts and being gnc and just. undeniably himself in the way he dresses/presents has really inspired me and helped a lot with my dysphoria lately. here's to feeling more comfortable in this body ✌️

[justanotherhh]

What if Striker got worse? What if he successfully assassinated someone. What if he does kill the rich? What if he realised his potential as an allophobic aspec who kills people? What if he got more fucked up, not less? I think it would be very fun

HEHEHEHEHEEHEEEE ALRIGHT REDEMPTION STRIKER HAS HAD HIS TURN LET'S GET INTO MY NO GOOD MEAN-SPIRITED "I HATE THESE ALLOS" SON!!!

when you think about it, Striker's not done anything soooo bad yet, not that he hasn't tried. he just keeps getting Foiled by that... foil, Blitzo! I think he deserves a win!

Ooh we need a more current death tragedy on this fucking show, I like a good tragedy, personally, and I think we're overdue another one. enough with the past fucking with us, what about new wounds? (this so won't happen shhhhh let me dream)

finale is all the royals gathered to determine Stolas' fate and Striker blows up the building can you imagine????? that's not even tragic, that's kind of based

Like, crucially, Striker still isn't wrong about a lot of his opinions, these royals have been fucking around with people for far too long!

Striker's growth is eventually no longer being thrown by people making sexual comments, now it just makes him angrier/more powerful. he is Fueled By Disgust!

allophobic Striker is the funniest thing, because it's practically canon, this man is done with your fucking romantic relationships getting in the way of the class war, with your sexual commentary, with all of it, he has decided simply to kill!

Striker who has no more ideals, he's gone full "burn it all down because why not at this point"

this is giving serial killer, and listen, we can debate "problematic representation" (a term that often loses meaning) until the cows come home, but we're two aspecs talking fantasy fulfillment, I think aspec characters should be allowed to kill because they're allophobic, I think it's really really funny as concept

I also think "more fucked up Striker" works thematically where we're at at the moment (to be more "what's going on in the show" for a second), we left him at a bleak place, whatever he does when he next appears I want it to be oh so fucked up

also, my boy deserves to do some fucked up shit simply As A Treat. he has dealt with this nonsense every episode he's in, can't a man threaten, and torture, and kill in peace these days? why is everyone so g-ddamn horny about it??? sometimes maiming doesn't have sexual subtext, it's just good ol' honest maiming!!!!!!!!!!

Striker doesn't need romantic fulfillment or the power of friendship, he just needs to stab someone, that's really all I want for him. A good, clean bit of violence, an episode where he wins and everyone else loses

We'll call it the "love loses" episode

the "I'm aroace so you can imagine how dangerous I am. I don't know how to marry or fuck, I only know how to kill" meme

TL;DR: SUPPORT STRIKER'S WRONGS!

[lapeaudelamemoire]

Trying to get everything in order to apply for yet another visa as my current one expires in less than 2 weeks, and I haven't been able to apply for a new one before now on account of my educational institute being a clusterfuck and not being able to give me my course completion any earlier than last week.

The "I want to die" in my head is fucking loud and non-stop.

Went for yet another fucking English proficiency test today as required for the g-ddamned visa despite having spoken English as my first language since literally being a toddler. What a colossal money scam.

Then I've just spent the last hour and some looking at insurance that I need, again for said visa.

I am not really catching a fucking break.

Sure, we went away for a week for a supposed break, which it kind of was - for my birthday, no less - except I was also still trying to wrangle my course completion certificate from said *bleeping* institute pretty much the entire time, and also still trying to sort what I need for this visa.

We come back and it is immediately straight back on no breaks no brakes. I had to arrange this fucking English test on the last day we were still away so that it'd be in time.

Back at work tomorrow and then we're off again on the weekend to partner's parents' place up in another state because it's fucking Easter; and I will still be trying to finish sorting this visa meanwhile before the start of the week after. This will likely involve having to ring my parents because the damned thing wants even my parents' travel history from the past 10 years in addition to mine.

My brain is low-key on a low, roasting burning fire.

And yeah, seeing the news about how migrants are being treated in the 'US' as well as the bullshit rhetoric spouted by the abysmally awful political ads being run here on billboards everywhere at the moment because it's elections here soon too is getting to me, seeing as yeah it still really gets me.

I'm so fucking tired.

[bleueraincheck]

Your Favorite FNAF Character Probably Would've Voted for Tr*mp

Or, at least, that's what the BRC fandom professionals are saying...

Written & Published by: @negativebleue of Bleue-Rain Check

Graphics & Media by: @negativebleue and @deadrainhaven of BRC via 'TierMaker'

Welcome back to our broadcast this beautiful morning! We got a "Lazy Sunday" special for you today if you're in the mood for the disappointing truth of some of our most beloved animatronics!

'Animatronics that Voted for Dictactor TACO'

So, before you start hating...

Ain't we right, tho??

You may have noticed that almost 45% of the 90+ characters shown in this graphic are listed as being "Registered Republican"'s or would claim "He'S bEtTeR fOr ThE piZzERiA!!"'s economy or something. I'd like to break-down some of these choices:

William Afton is a guaranteed. Couldn't imagine this literal shell of a man voting out of anything other than pure spite & the promise of tax write-offs for his next soul snatcher scam business. I'd be willing to give him his redemption arc if—once confronted with Tr*mp's BS-ery—Afton would "come back" for the (fake) 47th instead!

Freddy's programming transcends whatever soul you inject his suit with, unfortunately. Like, he's the FACE & NAME of this whole operation—he outta everybody can't go off the script! Well...I could see him completely flipping if there was some sort of "breach" in the "security" of the pizzeria, but let's stay realistic here, folks!! Freddy would've "hor hor hor-hor"'d his butt up to that voting booth with a singular mission.

In that same vein, Ballora's programming ties her to be loyal to whatever fault for Afton. Even if that fault is a big as voting for a convicted felon, Ballora would mark that choice down with a full felonious conviction of her own...

The Bidybabs were demented from their mechanical conceptions; they played the unassuming dutiful sidekick role to Circus Baby because they could tell she wasn't exactly that big a fan of TACO's. But once she fell down that forsaken pipeline and came back as Scrap Baby?? Oh, them Bidybabs had her scarfing down that alt-right BS like no tomorrow!

Chica, Monty, Showtime Foxy, and Music Man are in the same boat as far as the logic behind their votes: "keep the lights on, pack the place with people & employees, and let me do my g*ddamn thing!" Somebody's gotta make sure we have more bodie—I mean, party-goers to make this whole thing work. Especially, the performances! You think a generational talent like Showtime Foxy has time to wait around for "the perfect candidate" when the spotlight is calling? Tr*mp used to be something of a show-girl himself back in his reality TV days, so he understands more than anyone else on the ballot that the show must be EVERY hour ON the hour!!

Balloon Boy and Daycare Attendant Moon are the prime type of m*fos to throw the heaviest rock they could find and then gaslight you about how they dislocated their shoulder moments later. Imagine a scenario where you were in-between these two at the voting booths: on your left, you'd hear Moon frantically mumbling distraught nonsense in pre-regret for what he KNOWS he's about to do. And on your right, you'd hear that cursed phantom giggle on repeat because that little b*stard Balloon Boy also knows what he's about to do and he's literally overjoyed to do it.

More Bonnie's voted against Tr*mp than for him, but we'd expect nothing less from the GOAT afterall. However, FNAF 1 Bonnie was the only one of the OG main four to not bow down to the almighty Dictator TACO, so you know they had to retcon the h*ll out of him as punishment when it was time for the Mega PizzaPlex to come out.

Foxy was actually the opposite, having voted in favor of the downfall of democracy ALL THREE times for the same dumba*s, half-baked, misinformed reasons! Rockstar Foxy only got it right that one time because the parrot was absolutely subliminally messaging his a*s during rest mode each night before the election.

Did you agree with our assessment? If you really think about this critically for a second, I'm sure your own conclusions would be pretty similar!

Which FNAF character would you 100% entrust to vote the same way as you? And you can't say any of the Glamrock's (minus Monty) because they're a given!

Also, you're a liar if you'd pick any of the Withered's, but hey! Who am I to dictate in which ways your fantasy & fun come to life?

We'll wrap it up here and let you get back to your weekly relaxation. Or preparation day! Depending on how you do things where you're from. Here at BRC, we like to keep it easy...like Sunday morning and we hope you'll find some time to do the same.

Have a Bleue-Rainy Day, y'all!

[galaxymagitech]

My brother is convinced that he can “balance his hair’s oils” by refusing to shampoo it for weeks, and it’s come to a head today. My mom is apoplectic. She’s now shouting “my son wants to ruin the Christmas photos!” and that he “looks like a g-ddamn greaseball.”

In other news, we’re apparently responsible for bringing the menorah to Christmas dinner (and candles, which are extra easy to forget), and my granny asked me to teach everyone to play dreidel because “you can read the letters.” There are four letters on the dreidel, so I’m not sure how it’s at all meaningful that I can memorize נ, ה, ג, and ש. But apparently that means it’s my job to teach my Catholic grandma (and my very much non-Jewish cousins, if they aren’t too sick to come) how to play dreidel. That should be interesting.

Greasy Hair Brother and my mom also are having an argument about if blue is an acceptable shirt color for the Christmas photo, because everyone else is wearing red and green, but it is Hanukkah, so blue is seasonally appropriate.

Double the holidays? Double the chaos!

[nebulouswinds]

As I get deeper into wedding planning, I am realizing that the conflation of legal, civil, spiritual, religious, and social weddings is really causing distress for people. The frequency of complaint about separating aspects of the wedding in a way that is meaningful and effective for the couple is truly astounding.

Generally, there are four aspects in which a marriage is validated (in NA / Xtian-based systems): legally, religiously, socially, and reproductively. Not all marriages will include all aspects, but it is generally understood that the normative marriage will be legally recognized, including be recorded by the appropriate government and confer certain benefits upon the married couple; religiously structured, being performed within a religious tradition and conferring particular responsibilities upon the couple; socially recognized, where the couple is treated as a unit within social circles, with certain boundaries applying to thenunion; and reproductively - the couple are assumed to be having sex and eventually children.

To examine the different weddings:

The legal wedding is filing the marriage with the local court.

The civil wedding is the signing of the contract, often but not always done in a ritual manner including ritual phrasing.

The spiritual wedding is the joining of the couple in a manner consistent with their spiritual beliefs, but not necessarily within a religious tradition.

The religious wedding, naturally, is the ceremony following a specific religious tradition the couple (hopefully) subscribes to.

The social wedding is the representation of the couple as a married couple to society at large.

Often these weddings are comingled with each other, with a single ceremony fulfilling multiple categories, but they need not be beholden to each other. And none is lesser than another. Each is both entirely a wedding and also incompletely a wedding; one form may lead to another, as in a common law wedding.

Some of these aspects are not equitably available to a couple for various reasons (a non-religious couple; a couple who rely on disability benefits; a couple where one is unable to receive a divorce; and so on).

Bitches haven't a fucking leg to stabd on when they complain a couple have completed one (or more) forms of wedding before another. Stop fucking complaining about the "elopement" (signing the wedding contract and filing it wkth the court in order to receive marital benefits). Stop fucking complaining about the "elopement" (holding a closed religious/spiritual ceremony with only close family and friends, or those who are of the same religion). Just fucking enjoy the g-ddamn social wedding (a party celebrating the new marriage). Just fucking recognize that every part of a wedding the couple find important are critical to the wedding. Are part of the ceremony. Go eat your fucking cake and stop complaining about your sister having a ceremony last year for the legal benefits and having the celebration now, when it is financially or socially feasible.

Do you think you need to watch the consummation too?

Just as you won't be invited to stand before the marital bed, you weren't invited to sit in the courtroom. What the fuck does it matter? Why do you have to watch the ceremony (what do you mean by ceremony? the religious wedding? the courtroom? the months or years of discussion beforehand?) in order to take part in the social wedding? In order to eat cake and dance and help build the couple's household goods?

Good fucking hell.