#am i gonna grab some screenshots of that

[tkodaily]

[jockbroski34]

AlterEgo

The last thing I expected on my 20th birthday was to receive a gift from Cody, my roommate.  We were never close, and there was no way in hell he actually knew much about me to know it was my birthday without me telling him.  Him and I were basically complete opposites.  While I was your typical nerd, smart, introverted, and so on, he was basically your typical jock in all the worst ways.  He was boisterous, arrogant, and a total meathead.  We mostly agreed to stay out of each others’ way, considering our irreconcilable differences, but that didn’t stop him from being a massive pain in the ass.  His room was constantly in a state of disarray, with sweaty clothes scattered all over the place.  As such, I often avoided being anywhere near his room if necessary since it smelled like a locker room.  He often invited over his “bros” who were just as bad.  Whether they were hogging the TV to watch whatever game was on, smuggling alcohol into our dorm to get wasted, or playing catch in the fucking living room, they were always a nuisance.  And whenever I brought any of that up to him, he would always end up saying something like “It’s not that serious, dude.  We were just having a good time.”  Yeah, a good time at my expense.  Whoever assigned the two of us to live together must’ve thought this was some twisted joke.

I woke up at 9 AM, still a little tired from last night.  I hung out at one of my friends’ dorms to celebrate my birthday.  I yawned, and went to the kitchen to make some breakfast.  I saw Cody was up as well, his legs spread across the couch, to the point that he was taking up two seats, watching something on the TV that was several volume levels too loud for me.

“Hey bro, today’s your birthday right?”  Cody asked, as he tilted his head to face me.

“Uhh, yeah.  How did you know?”  I responded.

“Oh don’t worry about it, bro.  Happy birthday!”  I saw him get up and run to his disorganized room, likely to grab something for me.  I could see a pair of worn gym shorts on the floor through the crack in the door.  He pulled out an old Nike shoe box, since he likely had nothing better to put a gift in.  “I’ve been saving this for you.  I hope you like it!”  Is this his way of trying to get on my good side?

I rolled my eyes since I doubt he got me anything I would enjoy.  He probably just got me something that he’d enjoy, like some tight-fitting tank top or protein powder or something.  Not that I work out or anything.  The only gift I’d want from him is for him to stop being a douche.  I opened the box and I was surprised about what I saw.  It was a video game.  Not any that I’d ever heard of.  I looked at the box art and the words AlterEgo were written in a wacky, colorful font.

“Yeah, I knew you like video games, so I found this for you.  I heard on the internet that it’s pretty nitch…nichy…what’s the word…”

“Niche?”  I responded.  I had to admit, him struggling to pronounce the word right was a little amusing.  As amusing as being with a simpleton like him could be.

“That’s the word!  I got it for myself, but I realized like half an hour in that it wasn’t my thing.  I’m happy with what I have right now.  I figured you’d probably get more out of it than me.”

“Thanks, I guess.”

“No problem, dude.  Anyways, I gotta hit the gym.  I’m gonna be out all day so you have the PS5 all to yourself.  Hope you enjoy it bro!”

I watch him leave, thankful to have some peace and quiet.  As I ate breakfast, I read the back of the cover in order to figure out what this game was about.

“Become a new you!  In this life simulation adventure, you can become any kind of person you want and live any way you choose.  Control your fictional avatar, your AlterEgo, and level up your stats to become closer to your true self.”

The game seemed something like The Sims or Animal Crossing, but with some stat progression system.  It was a game that I had never heard of, but it could be some hidden gem.  The rest of the back was filled with screenshots from the game with the cartoony characters doing activities such as cooking, jogging, and riding a motorcycle.  I figured I might as well try the game since I did get it for free.  Even if it was from Cody, I wasn’t one to refuse someone’s generosity.

I put the game in the disk slot and booted it up.  The title screen had that same logo and some bubbly background music.  I pressed the start button and I was presented with a save selection screen.  I noticed that Cody’s save was on there, which was odd because I was playing on my account.  I knew I should’ve put a password on it.  I wanted to make my own character, but part of me was curious about the character that he made.  Knowing him, I can only guess.  His game time was less than an hour, as he was only on Day 1, and he likely spent most of that time on the character creation screen.

I started his save and my character was sitting in his room.  At this point, it was very bare, with only a bed and a bunch of cardboard boxes scattered around the room.  I guess the character starts by moving into their new home?  I went into the menu to find more information about the character.  The character was named Cody obviously and his AlterEgo somewhat matched him too.  I went into the stats screen and I was greeted by a tutorial.

“Here you can check your AlterEgo’s stats.  You have already set your initial growth modifiers and assigned your base stats.  If you need a refresher, whatever stats you chose your AlterEgo to excel at are highlighted in red and the ones you chose to trade off are highlighted in blue.  This means that your AlterEgo will grow in the stats in red much faster and prioritize activities that increase those stats and avoid activities associated with increasing your stats in blue.  As you play, your AlterEgo will naturally develop into one of hundreds of potential archetypes based on the activities that they excel at.  Experiment and see who you become!”

I looked at the stat screen and saw a list of stats with a bar indicating percentage level.  The stats included Strength, Constitution, Dexterity, Intelligence, Wisdom, Courage, Charisma, and Luck.  Not too far off from DnD I guess.  It seemed like he chose to have Strength and Constitution as his highest stats as their font was colored red and Intelligence and Wisdom as his weakest stats as they were colored in blue.  Gee, why am I not surprised…  Cody was anything but a genius.  It seemed like he had 20 initial points to allocate wherever he chose with a default limit of 5.  And I was equally not surprised to find that my meathead roommate chose to put 5 in Strength and Constitution again like a barbarian.  It’s like all he cared about was his looks and perceived masculinity, even in game.

Strength (physical strength): 5

Constitution (physical build and stamina): 5

Dexterity (agility and flexibility): 2

Intelligence (knowledge): 0

Wisdom (intuition and discipline): 0

Courage (risk-taking and bravery): 3

Charisma (social skills): 3

Luck (good or bad fortune): 2

After looking through his stats, I decided enough was enough and I didn’t really want to go around pretending I was Cody the whole game.  I quit out of his save and went back to the title screen.  I was back on the save select screen when I became confused.  There was still one save, except the name of the character wasn’t Cody…it was mine?  The play time was set to 0 minutes.  I don’t know how that happened, but if it saves me the trouble of building a character and reading more tutorials, I’m happy.

To my relief, the avatar representing Cody wasn’t there.  Instead, a very generic, average character stood in its place in the same room.  I wouldn’t be surprised if this was some placeholder account with everything set to the default.  Whatever, I can probably change stuff about him later.  I decided to move my AlterEgo outside and I was greeted by a map of a large city.  I chose an area of the map to explore at random and controlled my new avatar.  On the busy city street, there was a cafe, restaurant, and a gym.  It was too early for the cafe and restaurant to open, so I guess my only option here is the gym.  I’ve never stepped foot in a gym before, but this character doesn’t have to represent me as a whole.  Plus, I’d like my character to be well-rounded unlike Cody’s who would probably spend the whole time grinding here.

I went into the gym and had to perform a set of quick-time events.  First, I had to do some bench presses.  Then some squats.  Then finally, run on a treadmill.  At the end of it, my AlterEgo did a cartoony celebration and flexed his arms.  A pop-up showing that my Strength, Constitution, and Dexterity went up by 1, followed up by another one saying that my Strength and Constitution will double every time I do activities like go to the gym.  So it looks like Cody’s modifiers carried over after all despite everything seeming to be the default.  That should’ve been the first thing I checked.  I didn’t want my character to be specced to be some lumbering brute.  I suppose that if I wanted to get my character’s Intelligence and Wisdom, it’d probably be like playing on Hard mode.  Honestly, I was open to the challenge.

I was disappointed to find out that it’d be harder than it seemed.  When my character got home in the evening, I went into one of his boxes and I was presented with an option to read.  I was presented with several options, ranging from comics to full-on novels.  I chose the novel since I figured it would raise my Intelligence the best.  I watched my AlterEgo try to read the book, but I saw a look of confusion on his face.  Eventually, he grew frustrated and threw the book back into the empty box as if he were shooting through a basketball hoop.  I expected my Intelligence to stay the same, but no, it actually dropped!

“Sometimes when your AlterEgo fails to complete an activity, their stats can decrease!  These stats can even go into the negative.  Make sure to keep your stats high because it can become very difficult to increase your stats if they fall below a certain point.”

I couldn’t believe that my character struggled to even read.  This guy was nothing like me at all!  I hoped that it would be easier to raise my AlterEgo’s Intelligence because I didn’t want him to be a moron.  I watched my character fall asleep and I could see into his dream.  Another tutorial popped up.

“Sometimes your character will have dreams!  These dreams are mostly random, but will also depend on your character’s stats.  Just like other activities, you have a chance to increase your stats.”

I watched my character fight in a zombie apocalypse, but the zombies didn’t even look remotely threatening.  I succeeded in the activity and my Courage went up by 2 and my Luck and Strength went up by 1.  My character wiped his head of sweat as the zombies turned to dust.

The next day, I learned that my AlterEgo can go to school.  That was expected, considering my character’s age, only I didn’t realize how hard it would be for him.  He was sitting in a desk trying to write down notes.  Eventually, like an idiot, he slammed his thick head on his desk and started snoring.  This was honestly getting embarrassing.  My Intelligence and Wisdom dropped yet again, not by 1, but by 2.  If I didn’t do something different, my AlterEgo would basically be a clone of Cody instead of myself.  After class, instead of being given an option to go and do something, my AlterEgo is approached by a group of buff men.

Quarterback: Hey new guy, you’re looking pretty strong.  Judging from your Strength and Constitution, I think you’d make a good fit for the football team.  Your Dexterity and Courage also seem pretty good.  Wanna join, bro?

You know who else played football?  Cody.  I had to keep being reminded of him even when he wasn’t even around.  This was my character and I didn’t care about sports, so I clicked the no option.  To my surprise, my AlterEgo nodded instead.  It's like this game is going out of its way to spite me at this point.  Two tutorials popped up.

“If your Wisdom is too low, your AlterEgo might act on their own desires rather than your command.  This means that they can sometimes act on their own or select activities that they are more interested in rather than those they are not.  Raise your Wisdom or else you will have less freedom when developing your AlterEgo.”

“You have decided to join a club or organization.  This will grant you a passive growth to certain stats every week.”

I watched as my AlterEgo walked away with the group of jocks.  A football uniform magically appeared over his normal clothes.  For joining the football team, I was granted a point in Strength, Constitution, Courage, and Charisma every week, with the usual double for Strength and Constitution.

I kept playing the game, getting frustrated at my AlterEgo’s reluctance to even try to act smart or reasonable.  He frequently avoided or skipped intellectual pursuits to focus on those that made him look or feel good.  It honestly just felt random whether he wanted to obey me or not.  By the end of Day 7, the first week my stats were looking like this.

Strength: 30

Constitution: 28

Dexterity: 10

Intelligence: -20

Wisdom: -15

Courage: 21

Charisma: 17

Luck: 16

My Intelligence and Wisdom seemed unfixable.  My AlterEgo wouldn’t even bother to try to read or pay attention at school and he consistently started to make random choices that satisfied his needs as the week progressed.  I grew incredibly frustrated at this, but out of curiosity, I wanted to see if there was an end to this so I could go back and make my own character.  Either way, this game was plagued with questionable design choices.  It’s like the AlterEgo was already locked into a specific path.  I hoped that I had accidentally skipped a tutorial or something and that I hadn’t softlocked myself out of raising certain stats.  Unfortunately, my AlterEgo’s stats continued to grow and drop as I hit Day 30.

Strength: 75

Constitution: 69

Dexterity: 44

Intelligence: -66

Wisdom: -49

Courage: 54

Charisma: 37

Luck: 41

I received another tutorial message on Day 31.

“You look like you are on track to evolve into your archetype very soon!  By this point, your AlterEgo’s stats will be locked in place.  That will be the end of the main story, but there is still so much to enjoy afterwards!”

I figured I might as well see this through to the end.  You know, see how much of an idiot my character can become.  Despite my efforts, all my AlterEgo does now is work out, practice and go to games, and go to parties, outside of necessities.  His Intelligence is so low that he rarely even goes to school anymore and that has caused his intelligence to plummet to the bottom.  I played for even longer, eventually hitting Day 60.  Turns out that this is the day I would discover my AlterEgo’s archetype.

“Congratulations on making it this far.  I hope you are excited to find out your archetype, because I know I am!  Remember that these changes are permanent, so there will no longer be ways to increase or decrease your stats.”

I watched my AlterEgo marched onto the stage and I was able to view my final stats and a rating of each of them.  The descriptions seemed to be heavily based on my other stats, and trust me, they were very satirical, and in my case, very scathing.

Strength: 100

I’d give this an A+.  I’m not even sure if you are human anymore.  I’ve seen you lift things that no normal man could, not because you have to, but because you want to.  You spend more time at the gym than you do at your own house and you might give The Hulk a run for his money.

Constitution: 100

You also get an A+.  Your months of training at the gym have given you a perfect, chiseled body that looks like it could be made out of iron.  You have a seemingly endless supply of testosterone and your stamina (in more ways than one, it seems) cannot be beaten.

Dexterity: 75

This gets a B.  You are very athletic and quick on your feet despite your appearance.  However, your large size means that you can be pretty clumsy and you’ve probably broken more things than you’d like to admit.

Intelligence: -100

I’ll just go along with your teachers and give you a big fat F.  Are you even trying?  I worry that there’s not a single thought going around in your thick skull.  You care very little for anything intellectual or sophisticated, not that you even know what those words mean.

Wisdom: -90

Likewise, you also get another big fat F.  Were you dropped on your head when you were a baby or did you take too many tackles to your cranium?  You have incredibly poor judgment and you only make decisions that satisfy your brutish desires.  In short, you often act before you think.  Your lack of discipline is only matched by your lack of brain cells.  As long as you’re having fun, should I really care what you do with your life?

Courage: 90

I’d give this an A, but not an A+.  Because your brain moves too slow to process any risk, you often think before you act.  You often find yourself in the most dangerous of situations and you often perform incredibly stupid stunts.  When you’re on the field, you’re a risk taker, and at least it usually pays off.  On the bright side, you always come out unscathed, so I can commend that.

Charisma: 70

I’d give this a B-.  Being on the football team and being very attractive is going to place a lot of eyes on you, but they are all focused on your body because everything else you have to offer is very superficial.  I wonder if you surround yourself with people who think and act the same as you do or if people keep you around to laugh at every stupid word that comes out of your mouth.

Luck: 80

Lastly, you get a B.  Your luck genuinely amazes me sometimes.  Despite everything, despite your lack of any intellectual thought or reasoning, you have survived long enough to make it this far in life.  This alone proves that life favors some over others.  If there is room for the concept of a higher power in your shrunken headspace, then they probably feel a sense of amusement at the state of you bumbling around through life with only your good looks and muscles salvaging you.

“What do you think?  Are you happy with your results?  Anyhow, it’s time to reveal your archetype.  It’s who you are and who you will be from now on!  Drumroll please…  (As if it wasn’t obvious enough…)  You, my friend, are…THE JOCK!”

The Jock

You are likely an athlete or bodybuilder and you likely care little for intellectual thought.  You enjoy playing and watching sports and working out above anything else.  You are hyper-masculine, aggressive, arrogant, and egotistical.  However, you are also very muscular, tall, athletic, popular, and handsome.  You feel a deep sense of camaraderie with anyone you consider your bro, which mostly includes other jocks like yourself.  Your wardrobe mostly consists of tank tops, jerseys, varsity jackets, shorts, sweatpants, jockstraps, baseball caps, sneakers, and everything in between.  Because of your high testosterone and your above average genitals, you are viewed as a desirable partner and often partake in sexual activities with members of the opposite sex, and sometimes even other men depending on the person and situation.  Your most likely career path is as an athlete or coach, but as long as it doesn’t require too much deep thinking, you could probably find a job anywhere with your connections and attractiveness.  Enjoy your new self!

I watched my AlterEgo vanish within a cloud of smoke and come out a cartoonish representation of your average stereotypical jock with blonde hair and a very lunkish, yet admittedly impressive build.  He looked around, clearly disoriented, with a dull, confused look on his face before flexing with a cheesy, confident smirk on his face.  The audience cheered and clapped at this ridiculous personification of a walking stereotype as if they were watching a magic show.  Honestly, it was almost amusing how the description it gave for “me” couldn’t possibly be more wrong.  It sounded like everything Cody was, not me.  Although I guess I was playing with his settings, not by choice I will add, but I had little control over how my AlterEgo decided to live its life.  I just wish I could get him off my mind for just one day.  Either way, I found myself incredibly dissatisfied with my new AlterEgo, but I accidentally found out a way to make things even worse for me.  I just wanted to scroll through the remaining text to get to the credits, since I have been playing for 8 hours by now, when I saw a selection that would seal my fate.

“Are you satisfied with your result?  Now that you’ve discovered who you truly are, are you ready to be The Jock in the real world?  WARNING: If you select Yes, your save will be deleted as a result.  These changes are permanent.  If you click No, you can continue playing after the credits.”

I accidentally clicked Yes as I was mashing through the text.  What the hell was I thinking?!  I had no idea that this would change the entire trajectory of my life.  At first I felt nothing, as the screen faded to black.  Then, I saw the credits start to roll, playing a remix of the joyful title screen music, and that’s when I started to feel all warm inside and I felt a painful shock come from my controller.

I felt a sudden wave of pain rush through my body as my bones started to crack and shift in my body and my muscles began to inflate like balloons.  I looked at the credits and noticed that the new jock AlterEgo was doing the things he normally enjoyed doing in the background.  But I couldn’t really concentrate on it as I found myself focusing down below.  My legs stretched and stretched until I was around 6’4.  My feet grew to a size 15 and my thick glutes and ass made me sink deeper into the couch from their weight.  The fat in my stomach felt like it was melting as it left behind nothing more than a layer of sweat and a firm six pack of abs.  My upper chest formed into a round set of bouncy pecs.  Likewise, my biceps and triceps were almost the size of my head now and my soft hands became rough and covered in calluses from intense lifting.  I felt my clothes cling tightly to my body as if they were two sizes too small, and they’d easily rip if my body grew any more.  My shirt fit more like a crop top on me and my clothes were damp from pit and ass sweat.

I felt my long hair recede into my head until it formed into a shorter cut that was much easier to maintain.  As it did that, my chestnut-colored locks lightened into a golden blonde.  My soft, round eyes became more sharp and masculine and I could feel them turn from a chocolate brown into an icy shade of blue.  My youthful face lost most of its baby fat and buried beneath it was nothing more than the chiseled edges of my jawline.  The lower half of my face, which used to be soft and hairless, was now covered in a prickly lawn of stubble.  Even my pasty skin turned a shade tanner from the years I spent in the sun throwing balls around.  I noticed that my entire body started to sweat profusely to the point that I could smell my own musk and I became absorbed by my new-found masculine scent.  I could smell the testosterone that was pumping through my veins like a drug.  I felt powerful, dominant, virile, and dare I say it, good…  Lastly, I found my lips contort into an obnoxious, conceited smirk.  Was I…enjoying this?  Judging from the growing feeling in my groin, I was led to believe that I was.  And it kept growing and growing and growing…

All the while, the credits continued to play and the happy-go-lucky music felt like it was mocking my painful situation.  Despite the strange pleasure I felt, it was only a distraction as my body still writhed in pain through the whole process while I changed entirely into a real life manifestation of my AlterEgo.  What the hell is this game?  I noticed that the jock avatar stared directly towards the screen, as if he was breaking the fourth wall, and started to walk closer and closer before vanishing from his virtual prison for good.  The lively credits started to simmer down, giving the screen a more empty and disquieting feeling.  That was the last thing I noticed before I felt a sharp headache ring through my head.  I am usually fine playing games for a long period of time so why…Why did my roommate buy me this game anyways, bro?  If he was gonna buy me any game, he should’ve gotten me the new CoD or Madden game, not this weird shit.  I had to admit, it was kinda addicting.  I liked being able to work out or play sports even when I’m at home.  Wait, what was that?  I felt like I just heard another voice in my head, both sounding similar yet different to my own.  Eventually he called out directly to me.

“Hey bro, it’s me.  Your AlterEgo.  You know, the real you.  It’s been fun, dude.  Now I get to enter the real world, isn’t that sick?  So here’s what’s gonna happen, dude.  I am currently inside your mind and I’m making the final changes to turn you into the person you were always meant to be.  That’s right dude, we are becoming one singular person in both body and mind.  Don’t try to struggle or fight back.  You know I’m stronger than you.  There’s no going back.  So, are you ready to become one with your true self?

No…I thought to myself.  I wasn’t a jock.  I was never a jock.  I’m nothing like my AlterEgo.  This is a mistake.  This was Cody’s AlterEgo, not mine!

“Chill out, bro.  I know you read the warning and you clicked Yes, so you obviously knew the risk.  Why did you keep playing if you knew you’d become a jock regardless of the decisions you made?  Because you are one deep down.  Or maybe you secretly wanted to be one.  Maybe you wanted to see what life was like on the other side.  Maybe this Cody guy wanted you to try out this save, you know, to see what would happen...  Whatever reasoning, it really doesn’t matter dude.  I know you can feel me taking over your mind.  You’re finding it harder to think.  Soon you’ll be The Jock, me.  I just wish you realized a little sooner who you really were…”

I felt my brain starting to shut off and my vision starting to become blurry as my AlterEgo took it over.  I don’t even know how any of this is possible, even by today’s standards.  An AI buried deep within the game was taking over my body and mind entirely, reshaping me in his image.  But I continued to resist, to cling onto whatever parts of my personality I could.  However, as I felt my mind sink deeper and deeper into this mental void, I felt myself slowly becoming more and more like The Jock.  The archetype that was decided on, not by me, but for me.  Until that’s all I was.

Everything turned black for a few seconds.  I slowly regained consciousness as my brain rebooted itself.  Wait…what’s a reboot?  I sat and watched the credits with a dim look on my face as it finally ended.  I was booted back to the title screen and saw that my save was indeed deleted.  This was proof that my AlterEgo was now a part of me and that he was finally whole.  I pulled out my phone wanting to learn more about this game, because, dude, it was kinda fucking weird. By scrolling, I couldn’t find much, but I did discover a post from not too long ago on some ancient forum site that was probably made in the early 2000s.

“Is The Game AlterEgo Real?”

“I’ve heard rumors about this game called AlterEgo, but I have very little information on it.  It’s said to be incredibly dangerous and could lead to permanent bodily and mental changes.  Throughout all of my research, I could not find any copy of the game for sale, nor any definitive proof that it’s real or any information on the company that developed it.  If you have any information on this game, please let me know.”

I skimmed through the forum page, not that interested in reading what everyone had to say.  Who has time for that anyways?  But I did find one reply that caught my eye.

“I can confirm with certainty that AlterEgo does exist.  My friend received it as a gift for Christmas and he wouldn’t stop talking about it to me.  It’s like he was addicted.  A week later, when I saw him next, I could barely even recognize him.  His body had grown and changed greatly and he didn’t act like his usual self.  I even feel like his memories might be a little distorted.  I tried checking his house to find the game in order to figure out what it was all about, but I don’t think he has it anymore.  He probably sold it or gave it away since he said he finished it.  No matter what, he won’t tell me.  If there are any other copies of the game left, please let me know.”

Woah, so this game is fucking weird, dude.  Wasn’t just me.  I just played it right?  But I don’t feel any different.  You know, I bet these nerds would pay a lot for a chance to find out about this game.  Maybe they might come out as different people.  I’ll put it up on eBay for a high price.  One of those dweebs just has to take the bait.  I wouldn’t mind a little cash though.  I’d feel bad for selling Cody’s gift, but just imagine what I could get with that much money.

“Hey bro, you still in here dude?”  I heard a familiar voice shout as they opened the door.

“Yo Cody, there you are.  What’s up dude?”  I was happy to see him.  Cody was my roommate and my best friend.  We were practically inseparable.  When he made eye contact with me, his eyes widened.  I couldn’t really blame him for being impressed with my awesome body.

“You beat that game I gave you already?”  He seemed surprised, yet almost impressed.

“Yeah, it’s not usually my type, but I enjoyed it dude.”

“Do you…feel any different, bro?”  Cody sounded kinda hesitant there.  Had he read about the rumors too?  I don’t see why he’d have to worry.  None of those rumors are true anyways.

“Nah, same as I’ve always been.”

“Alright, good.  I was just making sure you were down to get some food.  You should be out partying and celebrating your birthday, not playing some nerdy video game.  And trust me, I know all the good spots.”

“You’re right bro.  I haven’t gotten enough exercise in today.  Let’s go.”

“Wait, before you go, your clothes are so sweaty dude.  You should change.”

“Oh shit, good idea.”

“Y-you can just wear one of my clothes.  They’d probably fit you better.”  He was right.  As I soon realized, someone shrunk all my clothes as part of a prank.

Me and Cody went to a sports bar to watch the game.  If I remember correctly, this was our favorite spot to get food, except you know, anywhere that lets me hit my macros.  Since it was my birthday, he even paid for the whole meal.  I don’t remember how long I’ve known him, but couldn’t ask for a better bro.  On the way home, Cody grabbed a six pack of beer from the frat house and brought it to our dorm to drink the night away.  I wasn’t old enough to drink, but it’s not like I never had alcohol before.  And besides, today was basically my cheat day.

We got wasted while we watched TV, and we did some things that I probably wouldn’t admit to anyone but him.  I couldn’t help it though.  I hadn’t gotten laid all weekend and it was my birthday.  Quite frankly, I deserved it.  Thankfully Cody took one for the team.  He said it wasn’t weird because we’ve definitely done it before and that it was our secret.  I had to give him credit.  His tight hole is better than most girls’.  I didn’t know he was a bottom until tonight.  I also didn’t remember having a dick this big, but you don’t see me complaining.  After all was said and done, I passed out drunk next to him in his bed, our bodies drenched in sweat and each other’s fluids, as I enjoyed the bromance I have with my best bro.  This was the best birthday ever.

The next day, I got up extra early to go for a run despite my hangover.  Afterwards I went to school, but like usual, I struggled to pay attention.  It was like my mind was in a constant fog.  My grades are slipping and this football scholarship is the only thing keeping me from dropping out entirely.  After classes, I joined Cody and the others at practice.  Throughout the day, I kept getting this feeling of uh…dayjah voo?  That word that means that you feel like you’ve done something before.  I wasn’t exactly sure where it was coming from.  I shrugged it off.  I was just a jock and I didn’t need to worry about stuff like that.

When I got home, I got an offer for the game Cody gave me.  You know, AlterEgo.  Some nerd seriously offered $1000 for it.  I didn’t actually know it was that rare.  I hope he enjoys it more than I did.  I’ll sure enjoy the 1000 dollars.  I bet he’ll love passing it around to all his other geeky friends.  I wonder what their AlterEgos might look like…

[milesmolasses]

nah nah cuz HEAR ME OUTT, that lipstick kiss trend on tiktok with e42!miles and he would usually disagree but he loves when the reader kisses him so he gives in <3 (love your work, btw!!)

kisses for miles (e-42 miles x blk!reader)

— besos para él💋

— ⚠️: reader talkin crazy, use of military time, cursing

y/n: hey lol

mookie 💋: …yes u need sum?

y/n: can u come over please?

mookie 💋: what u tryna get into?

y/n: ur nasty 😒

mookie 💋: dgmt why am I coming over

y/n: baby pleaseeee just come over it’s a surprise

read 18:27

“nah I know he did not..” you said aloud. miles was always talking about not leaving him on read and now he wanna play games?

you swiped up on your phone, leaving the messages app to check Life360. he made sure to leave his location on at all times for you to find him, especially when he was in prowler duty. checking for miles location, you saw he was on the move to your direction.

rolling your eyes, you took a screenshot and sent it to him captioning it, “u coulda just said i’m omw.”

you rolled out of bed and put on some house slippers. before leaving your room, you threw your bonnet off and played around with your hair, putting the braids in a side part. walking to the living room, you heard a knock on the door; mind you, there was only ever one person who knocked on your door.

going straight for the door, you unlocked it so he could enter on his own. walking back to the living room of your house you yelled, “It’s open!”

you heard two clicks from the door, indicating to you that someone had opened and closed it.

“take off your shoe—!”

“I did.”

sitting crisscrossed on the couch, you looked behind you to the front door to find miles dropping his shoes off near the door. he walked over to you and grabbed you by both hands, pulling you up from the couch. still holding your hands in his, and your lips being mear inches apart he said in a low, deep voice, “so why you call me over here?”

you wrapped your hands around his neck and smiled before placing a soft kiss on his lips. “I can’t ask you to come over no more?” you asked, raising both your eyebrows with a small smile.

he reached for your back, tugging on your braids which lifted your head back and left your neck exposed to him. placing small kisses all over your neck, he smiled as he said between kisses, “of course you can esposa, but why so late is what i’m asking.”

“I wanna do something with you,” you said, pulling away from miles lips on your neck. plopping back down to the couch. miles joined you sitting down as you reached for your phone to pull up the video you wanted to show miles. once you found the video, you gave miles your phone and turned up the volume so he could hear it.

it was a video of a girl putting on lipstick, and “accidentally” smearing some of it under her lip. some random hand came and wiped the makeup off her face, and soon the camera panned to where the hand was coming from— a guy with lipstick stains all over his face and a dopey smile coming on screen.

miles re-watched the video again in silence, eyebrow furrowed to watch the video more intently.

“hell no—”

“but miles, please it’s gonna be so cute,” you pleaded grabbing his hand. you were slightly bouncing on the couch, your face decorated with a puppy dog pout. “you don’t even wear lipstick baby. so whatchu gon’ do?” he challenged.

“I can use lipglo—”

“hell no,” miles said again as he laughed. “that shit is sticky and a pain to get off. ion even like you kissing my lips with that on, let alone my face.”

“why don’t you ever wanna do cute couple stuff wimme?” you whined. miles pulled you onto his lap and kissed your lips again.

“what do you mean? we do cute couple shit all the time. I just don’t want gloss all on my face,” he reasoned as your head forehead came in contact with his chest.

miles remembered all the cute things you made him do with you as a couple; matching nails, the two of you baking, the cute arts and crafts you made him do with you— he remembered all of it.

if he was being honest, he enjoyed all the cute things you made him do with you. he would have never even thought of doing half the shit y’all did together, and now, he has a cute fungo pop that looks like you on his windowsill.

“think about how cute it will be; i’ll sit on your lap—just like i am now— and put kisses all over your face. that don’t sound like heaven to you?”

his hands gripped your waist as he slid them a bit under your shirt; he liked skin-to-skin contact with you. he looked at you with his head tilted to the side, like he was contemplating on whether or not to say yes. “aight, how bout this; show me how you’re gonna get that shit off my face when it’s over.”

you smiled as you scrambled off his lap to go to your room. going straight to your vanity, you opened the first drawer and pulled out a makeup bag with all of your supplies, as well as your micellar water and cotton pads. running quickly back to the living room, you found miles with his legs spread widely and his arms sprawled at the top of your couch.

“ew you look like a man,” you said as you approached the couch.

“you better talk to me nice ‘fore I get the hell up outta here—”

“ok ok i’m sorry!”

he smiled at your reaction as you placed yourself back on his lap facing him. placing the water down next to you, and opening the small pouch, you pulled out your red dior lip oil. “alright, so here’s what imma do; i’m gonna swatch some on my arm, and then i’m gonna show you how to take it off.”

opening the lip oil, you removed the wand and held up your arm. running the wand over your skin ripped a hole in your heart, feeling like this was such a waste of such a good product.

“what’s wrong ma?” miles asked as he saw the small pout on your face.

“i’m wasting my shit for this,” you whined looking pouty. miles raised your chin up to look at him and pecked your lips. “i’ll buy you another one ma, it’s all good,” he said.

whenever miles offered to buy you anything, you got a little shy and bashful, telling him he didn’t need to do that for you. however, he always does it anyway and tells you not to worry about it.

with a downturned smile, you averted your eyes from him and said a small, “okay.” turning back to what you were doing, you showed miles the two swatches of gloss on yours arm. picking up the bottle of micellar water, you told him that this is how you were going to take it off.

opening your box of cotton pads, you grabbed one and put some of the water on the pad. whipping off your arm, you showed him it was cleansed of the lip oil.

“see, good as new. that’s gonna be your face soon too,” you giggled. he grabbed your arm and felt where you whipped the oil off. it felt damp, but not sticky. he raised an eyebrow as if convinced and said,

“i’m still not letting you put that shit on my face mami.”

“Miles-uhh!” you said, dragging out his name.

“ay i’m kidding, relax! i’ll let you do your lil trend, aight?” he laughed as he slid his hands further up your shirt, hands caressing your back, and his face leaned into your chest.

“boy don’t play wimme,” you rolled your eyes and pulled his braids back, making him look at you.

“I am not the one.”

he smiled and leaned back into the couch.

“just put on the gloss and kiss me,” he laughed. you opened back up the lip oil and grabbed your phone. swiping left, you opened up the camera app and rubbed your lips with the wand. miles watched your lips intently as his grip on your waist tightened.

“don’t get too excited, i’m only kissing you.”

putting the want back in the tube, and your phone back on the couch, you grabbed miles face and started with a kiss on the cheek. then, a kiss on the chin. and then before you knew it, he had kiss marks all over his face.

you had to re-apply the gloss to your lips a few times, but when you saw miles entire face and neck smothered in remnants of you, you bit your lip and said, “you look sexy like this.”

“focus on the damn video mami,” said sounding annoyed. he obviously didn’t like the feeling of the gloss on his face because he was scrunching his face up every two seconds.

“what, you don’t like my kisses?” you said with a pretend pout.

“of course I do baby, but this feels so nasty on my face,” he said leaning his head back whining a little.

you grabbed your phone off the couch and told him to stop acting like a baby. going to tiktok and opening your favorite sounds, you clicked on the sound and started recording.

as you re-applied the lip gloss to your lips, you “accidentally” smudged the wand below your lips a little.

after miles reached and used his thumb to wipe the gloss off, you turned the camera to show miles with his head leaned back slightly, and kiss marks all over his face.

grabbing you by your neck, he pulled you in for a kiss just before the video ended. he gave you an opened mouth kiss which you happily returned before pulling back with a loopy smile.

“that wasn’t part of the video…” you said, still inches away from him lips.

“I know.”

— lol I got a lil lazy so I don’t really like his this turned out

— I don’t think miles likes ur lipgloss (*´-`)

— however, e-1610 probably would. he would eat this shit up🤭

[cherrycokedup]

Bro what happened in the nevercord?? I am not a part of it but still curious

EDIT: please look at @thelesbomancer ‘s post/reblog, and @gothwineaunts ‘s post about this situation!

please defer to your own judgment when it comes to this, and don’t use my post as the end all be all! Those two posts have much more information on all of this! This post was made as this all unfolded and might be out of date (also turning off reblogs because i’m not an authority on this )

i'm gonna be careful not to name any names here because I don't want to start a hate train and I'm looking at all of this as neutral as possible and also please please please don't think of this like a call-out post or anything, it's not! I still think you can be a fan of rnf and support their work, this is just why I'm chosing to take a break from doing so!

Content Warning below for mentions of explicit content being sent to minors ( by a server member, not RnF, THANK GOD )

i don't have all the details but basically, someone was banned for sending heavy nsfw/pornographic images to minors, and then was unbanned later on because of two reasons

one: the children the images were sent too were banned from nevercord for varying reasons ( closest explanation I remember is about these kids doing witchhunts, whatever that means )

two: the evidence was apparently "unreliable" and heavily censored.

Also, the minors themselves didn't report this information, an adult did with screenshots, censoring the users of the kids.

The offending person claimed that they never knew the ages of the people talking to them and thought they were all adults, even though at least two victims from my knowledge have come forward and said the person did, in fact know their ages. The only age I've heard for sure was 12 years old.

My problem with the situation arised was when Red, the writer of Nevermore, posted a lengthy explanation that was pretty poorly worded. She used phrases about the situation, such as "egged on" or "cried wolf" about being sent this sexual content, saying it was the job of minors to stay safe on the internet. I was raising my eyebrow at that point, because the whole thing sounded rather victim-blamey.

Red then said that the evidence was faulty and suspicious for being heavily censored ( i don't know the full extent of the censoring ), and because of the fact it came from one person, an adult who was friends with some of the people who had been banned, implied reporting that behavior was all some sort of tatic to get one person they didn't like banned.

When a ton of people were (understandably, in my opinion) very upset by this response, including the victims, and other neutral parties, Red got very upset and started lashing out. I understand It had to be a stressful situation, having tons of people talking at you at once, but she started saying rather guilt tripping things, such as "I'm a horrible person then" "everything I do is actually for evil purposes", stuff along those lines. Admittedly, the situation was pretty upsetting to me, so once Red started saying those things I left. I might return to Nevermore one day, if there's signs of change and the like. I still deeply enjoy the comic, and the community! I don't think RnF are horrible people, I just think they worded this very poorly, and then continued to lash out when it didn't go as excepted lmao I'll grab some of the screenshots I took, and ask if my friends have any to add! If anyone else has anything to add about the situation, please do so in the notes or reblogs! I'm just saying my perspective here, and why I chose to leave! There might have been things I missed! screenshots below!

anyways, those are all the screenshots i have on haha, again for the millionth time I dont want this to become a massive big drama

[petrichor-idyllic]

@lu-thinkingstuff I accidentally deleted the original ask (and the entire fuckin fic I'd nearly finished along with it) so have a screenshot of your ask I managed to keep. Sorry.

I'm writing this as a standalone piece, but it can be read as a prequel to quite a few of my pieces if you please.

INDOCTRINATION

MASTERLIST | MINHO MASTERLIST

SUMMARY: See above. I know the request is fem!reader, but I guess this can be read as gender neutral since I don't think I used any pronous to refer to you, apart from you obviously lmao. Follows no cannon events. I am making this shit up. Can be read as a prequel to "Life before Drowning", any other of my fitting work, or as a standalone. Whatever ya want. References to the simulation sky that's in the books - if you're reading this as a movie fic, then let's pretend this is a failed WICKED experiment.

WARNINGS: Inappropriate language, annoying WICKED shenanigans, traumatised children, Ratman.

You met Minho when you were seven. Maybe eight.

The last few weeks had been a blur of chaos you can barely remember. With the Flare finally taking its victims in your hometown, families flocked to their last resort, donating their children to WICKED.

Most children weren't picked.

Of course, they weren't. Most children aren't immune. The occasional normal child was also plucked from the masses and swept away from the warmth of their families to the cold, white walls of WICKED's laboratories. But that was rare, and they were only ever valued as a control variable in whatever twisted experiments they took part in.

Not that you ever knew that.

The potential horrors didn't matter to most parents; yours included. Mothers and Fathers desperately passing their remaining blood to men in masks in hopes of saving their loved ones. There really wasn't much choice.

You were given even less choice as you were one of the lucky ones to be picked.

A white room became your home for several weeks. They made you forget your parents - those parents who willingly passed you into Ava Paige's custody in hopes you'd have at least a fleeting chance of survival on the infected planet.

They took your name, too. Your personality. The few memories you'd managed to develop so young. All of it; gone.

You were almost in a state of shock when they finally said you could leave your pristine tiled prison cell.

Following your capture through the endless high-tech halls and flawless clean corridors, you reach a large dining hall. Several long tables fill the room, along with the high-pitched chattering voices of children. The kids vary in age - some older, some younger, but that doesn't matter. They're all talking.

"Grab your food and find a seat." The booming, hollow voice of the balding man in a labcoat reaches your ears, and you can't even begin to process what he's saying.

"W-what?" Your voice is barely a whisper as you squeak out a response.

"Join the queue, and then find somewhere to sit. Your lunch break doesn't last long." He gives you no chance to ask anything else as he turns and walks back down the corridor. Leaving you with very little choice but to continue into the room.

Getting the food is the easy bit; a tray full of a passing excuse for food and a small cup of juice. Finding somewhere to sit is the problem. You mindlessly search for an empty seat, though your gaze mainly lingers on the masked individuals lining the room; armed and dangerous.

"Psst. Don't stare. They don't like it when you stare."

Your head snaps towards a voice. An Asian boy, about your age, leans over the table top, hand cupped around his mouth as he whisper-yells at you, like he's pretending to be subtle.

"...What?" You stare back at him as a grin creeps across his face as he sits back down.

"Those freaks? Duh? Don't stare at 'em. They'll snap at you." When you don't respond, the boy starts to sense your unease. "...You gonna sit down or what?" He vaguely gestures to the empty space on the bench across from him. It takes you a second to move, but he seems relieved when you do. "You got a name?"

"Uh, (Y/N)... I think."

"You think?" He scoffs as you struggle to get your leg over the slightly wobbly bench. You think it's wobbly, or maybe you're shaking too much; it's hard to tell.

"Well, yeah - that's not my real name, is it?" Your response leaves the boy unsure how to react. You're... not wrong.

"Huh. I guess. I'm Minho." He says with a grin. "And even if it ain't my real name, they made a good choice. It suits me, right?"

For the first time since you'd arrived, you find yourself smiling. Minho is charming, for a kid. He's already got an air of confidence about him, which is almost reassuring in this situation.

"Yeah," you giggle, "I guess it does suit you."

And that is how you met Minho. Reckless, cocky, funny, brilliant Minho. And by brilliant, I mean he is a brilliantly bad influence.

It's not like you got to see him very often - just over lunch and the rare breaks you both got at the same time. But when you did, it was always fun. You even developed a little group, mainly including Minho's friends - he has enough charisma for both of you.

The first time Minho snuck into your room, you were eleven.

It's the middle of the night, the faint sounds of footsteps from WICKED guards echoing through the small white room you reside in at nights. It's all background noise, now, you barely even notice it as you drift off to sleep.

Until the loud clattering of the vent hitting the floor makes you jump out of your skin, shooting up in bed.

"...shit." Minho murmurs as he peers into your room.

"Minho?" You whisper-yell at the sudden intrusion. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I couldn't sleep." He responds, matching your tone as he attempts to clamber out of the vent and onto the safety on the floor below.

"So, you decided to break into my room?" You climb out of bed, coming to assist your best friend as he slides down your wall.

"Yeah. Figured I'd give you a visit."

You cross your arms, eyebrow cocked as you glare at your friend. "Are you insane? We're gonna get in so much trouble if you get caught." You grumble at him, swallowing your initial shock (and your small smile thanks to his presence.)

"So? What are they gonna do?" Minho dusts himself off. "Make me train more? Poke me with another needle? However shall I cope?" His sarcasm results in another eye roll from you, but you can't help but chuckle as you shove him, playfully - but warning.

"They could lock you in your room for a week." A beat passes. "Again."

"Great." He grins. "Means I get some peace. Sleep away my problems."

"You're such a dick."

"You love me, really." He flashes you another signature cocky grin.

You don't even dignify that with a response. "What exactly are we doing then? Just... hanging out in my room?"

Minho hesitates, then looks back at the vent, then you again as a sly smile slowly creeps across his face. "I think I have a better idea."

And that is how you end up crawling through a vent in the middle of the night, and following your chaotic friend through the facility. Minho is a lot calmer than you are; cracking jokes, whistling and generally being a cocky little shit. You, however, are hissing at him every thirty seconds to shut the fuck up.

Somehow, you both stumble into a vacant hall. Well, Minho dragged you through another vent and whilst he gracefully jumped down, you fell in a heap on the floor.

"Christ-" you grumble as you dust yourself off, looking around the room. It's dark, unusually so - the only light creeping in from under the locked door to the room from the buzzing halogen bulbs. "Where are we?"

Despite your low tone, Minho doesn't do much to hide his voice. "Dunno. Damn - this place is huge!" The boy chuckles to himself, dragging his hand across the wall to navigate, the sound of his words, and comfort, creeping away from your reach.

"Minho-" you say into the void, further panic swelling in your gut.

"Yo, I think I found a light switch."

Before you can object that this is a bad idea, there's a hollow click, quickly follow by a binding light.

You weren't expecting it; expecting the same dull bulbs that consume the WICKED labs. But what you get is anything but.

The entire ceiling springs to life, imitating the bright blue of the sky you haven't seen since you found yourself in WICKED's custody.

"Holy shit-" Minho gawks upwards as he stares, too, finally in your line of sight.

The fake sky is scarily realistic - the glow of the sun, the faint fluffy clouds floating across the screen. You're not even sure you could call it a screen, honestly. There's not lines, or glitches or lagging from the technology. It looks so real. Like you could reach out and feel the damp clouds through your fingers, the heat of the sun on your skin.

You look at Minho, who looks at you at the same time. Both of you have no words; how could you? But your silence and exchanges looks say everything words could - what the actual fuck is this?

"...this is.." Minho starts, losing himself quickly.

"..beautiful." You finish for him.

"I was gonna say freaky." He responds, earning a chuckle from you as you wander into the middle of the room. "Hey, there's other buttons-" He says, gesturing to the control panel on the wall that he originally assumed was a light switch.

With the click of his fingers, dark clouds start to fill the fake-sky, creating a dimmer, more stormy atmosphere. But there's no rain. Just clouds.

Those seem to be the only two weather modes as Minho keeps switching between the two. Cloudy and sunny. It's definitely not quite advanced enough to imitate the real thing.

"Look- there's a time monitor." Minho mumbles as he moves a slider. The sky dims, as bright sunset colours fill the ceiling before it creeps into dusk, and then into a series of bright stars.

Minho's goofy grin says enough as he moves away from the controls, joining you in the middle of the room. You barely even notice him until he's crouching the lie on the floor.

"What are you doing?" You raise an eyebrow at him as he moves to lay on his back, looking up.

"Star-gazing, duh. What does it look like?" He says as he smiles at you, before gesturing for you to join him.

"We're gonna get caught-"

"Will you relax?" He chuckles, leaning up on his arms. "When are we ever gonna get a chance to do this for real? Might aswell enjoy it whilst we have the chance."

"It's fake." You cross your arms defiantly.

"Still pretty. Still better than our boring white rooms." He retorts. "C'mon."

You sighs, but relent as you move to lay next to him.

He's right. It really is pretty. The mimic stars sparkle and flutter, and suddenly the labs and the experiments feel worlds away, even if your escape is an extention of your captives skills.

Minho suddenly starts chuckling.

"What? What's so funny?" You say, turning your head to look at him.

"Nothing." He shrugs. "Just thinkin' that if Thomas was here, he'd probably be telling us about all those star thingies."

"...star thingies?"

"Yeah. You know? Those... stars that are, like, in a pattern."

"...constellations?" You can't help the amused smile creeping across your face at your friends ignorance.

"Yeah- those. They got names don't they?" Minho turns to look at you. "Thomas is such a dork. He'd know all of them."

You shake your head as you look back up at the ceiling, but Minho keeps looking at you.

"We should tell the others." You say, not noticing his gaze.

"What?"

"About this room. Newt and Sonya would love this."

"I thought you didn't want to get caught?" He chuckles and you roll your eyes.

"Yeah- but this is cool. They should see it."

A beat passes as Minho continues to look at you. "Nah."

"Nah?" You look at him, surprised by this. He's rebellious and fiery and is normally the first to drag everyone into schemes and fun despite the risks.

"Nah... this is... ours." He says, smiling softly at you, before he shifts slightly to slips his fingers between yours, looking back up. "Just ours."

And that's what it became.

At least once a week, you and Minho would sneak around and into this secret special room. You'd spend hours talking and messing around, and somehow, you didn't get caught. Or maybe some of the kinder WICKED people were turning a blind eye to two kids enjoying themselves.

Who knows.

It was like this for about a year. Maybe a year and a half.

But, things took a turn.

Minho was starting to revieve praise for his athleticism. He became one of the most physically capable subjects, and it was impossible to get him away from a rigged-up treadmill. So, by the end of the day, he was exhausted. Too tired to be crawling around vents with you.

You were thirteen, maybe fourteen when Minho ended up crawling though your vents again.

Hearing the familiar noise, you're out of your bed before he's even here, your bare feet already on the cold floor as he appears.

"Minho-?"

"I know. I know." He grumbles. "I'm sorry." He says, before you can even get so much as a word in, and it leaves you stunned.

"For what?"

"For like... not being here. For neglecting you, I guess." He shrugs as he runs a hand through his hair.

"Neglect-?" You cut yourself off. "Dude, they've been working you to the bone. You don't have to apologise."

He sighs, seemingly of relief. "Yeah, well, I still feel like a dick. You're my best friend."

"Well, you're here now." You attempt to reassure him. "We can go back to the sky room."

He shakes his head. "Nah. I was thinking we could go exploring." He flashes that damn grin at you again.

"...exploring?" You raise a brow, crossing your arms.

"Yeah. Yanno- like me, Newt and Thomas used to do."

"I never joined in with that."

"Well- you should've. And we were exploring when we found the sky room, so you're no so innocent." He chuckles, and you can't help but admit he's right. Yet, he continues at your hesitation. "Look, we found that room by chance. Surely there's more cool and interesting things to find. I'm getting bored of looking at the same fake sky everyday."

Something in that comment stings. You'd never gotten bored of that pretend sky. Maybe because you'd always been with him - and you could never get bored of him.

"C'mon." He drags out the syllable. "One night of exploration. Just one. Who knows how far they'll be making me run from now on. Better take the chance whilst you have it."

You playfully shove him at this. "...fine. One time only. Okay?"

"Okay." He smiles. "Let's go."

So, once again, you find yourself creeping around the sleeping facility with your far too confident best friend.

Though, when Minho reaches a locked door, you would've never expected him to slip an excess card out of his shoe, swiping it into the card reader.

"What? Where did you get that?" You hiss, wide-eyed and stunned.

"Some dumb lab-coat dude left it on the side. So, I picked it up. Finders, keepers." He says as he pushes the door open.

Sneaky around is one thing, finding hidden rooms through vents - but stealing an ID card is something else. You're literally never going to see each other again if you get caught. Not that you get chance to voice your concerns as Minho walks into the room.

This sinking feeling creeps into your gut, yet, you can't find it in yourself to tell Minho. What if he really is starting to find you boring? Being whiney to him about this would only confirm that. You don't need him getting closer with someone else, especially not the flocks of girls in the dining hall who have started taking interest in the boy since he started his physical training.

Okay. Maybe this is creeping beyond friendship. It was years ago, but you're always thinking about the way he held your hand the first time you found that room. How it was just yours. Your special place, just for the two of you. And he doesn't want to go there anymore?

You've never felt so insecure.

So, you keep quiet.

The first room is full of labelled chemicals you don't understand.

The second is full of strange, clouded tubes, with slimy, creatures with metal arms. Even Minho was eager to leave that one - to remain ignorant for his own bliss, pulling you along once you stop to stare into the tubes. You suspect Thomas mentioned something to him. Thomas has always been Ava's favourite.

Though, the third is far less scary. It's a office - well, more like a small library with a computer and a desk. Filing cabinets liter the walls with endless documents.

Minho lets out a low whistle. "A computer." He grins, casually sliding into the office chair as he starts fiddling with the computer. Having most of the common sense in this friendship, you've assumed that the computer is password locked.

Which is confirmed by Minho's hushed cursing.

So, you start looking through the documents in the drawers. A lot of them are medical files and general testing that you don't really understand.

Though, a few documents contain blueprints and titles such as "the Maze Trails" and "The Scorch Trails". They're detailed and confusing.

"Minho-" you gets his attention, passing him the notes as he's distracted from the computer, a puzzled expression crossing his face as he looks through them.

He doesn't get much time to comment as you find another interesting drawer; labelled "Subjects."

Flicking through a few, you recognise the pictures of the people you've spent the last few years with. Teresa. Thomas. Gally.

You stumble upon Minho's- grinning at his awful mugshot style photo. A7. The Leader. They've already got him marked down pretty faithfully.

Though, something consistent through all the documents is the phrase "status: Immune." Something about that stands out to you, for some reason.

That is until you reach Newt's file.

Staus: Nonimmune. Control Variable.

Nonimmune?

Nonimmune.

"Uh, Minho-?"

"These maps are insane." He mumbles, still examining the blueprints. "Do you reckon these are those big plans Thomas is always yapping about?" He picks his head up to look at you, noticing your face drop, concern written throughout your features. "What? What is it?"

"...we're all immune to the Flare, right? That's why they're testing us. To find a cure?" You don't even look up at him.

"Yeah..? Why else would we be here?" His grin is there, same as always, but now it's uneasy and uncertain. You look at him, before walking over and slapping Newt's file onto the table.

It takes him a moment to catch on, but when he does, his face drops, and he just looks at you.

Before any words are exchanged, footsteps can be heard from down a corridor.

"Shit-" you both scramble, collecting all the papers and stuffing them in whatever drawer they came from (or whichever is closest.)

It's a mad dash to get out of the room - adrenaline and fear coursing through you both. You didn't even find your own file.

Are you immune? Could the Flare get you?

Little do you know, Minho is internally freaking out over the same thing.

In your panic, your silence evades you, which alerts whatever guard was prowling the building.

"Quick! Up here!" Minho commands as he struggles to open a vent, giving you a leg up before yanking himself up the wall and diving in.

You don't even know where you're crawling to, you're just trying to rush away. But, eventually, it goes quiet, only the sounds of yours and Minho's panting in the small vent system.

"We have to tell Newt." You say, managing to turn in the small space to face him. Minho hesitates for a moment, but nods.

Of course you have to tell him.

"Yeah, at lunch, tomorrow. We'll tell him. But right now, we have to get back to our rooms. They'll be checking." You nod in agreement. "Let's get you back first."

Minho has a far better memory than you, leading you back to the safety of the room before he turns to navigate the way back to his.

"Minho-" you say, turning to look at him once your feet hut the floor, a sense of dread overwhelming you.

"..yeah?"

You can only look at him. There's so much you want to say, but none of it want to come out. Some deep gut feeling screams at you that this is the end, but you tell yourself you're being silly.

His blank expression pushes you to talk, though.

"Just.. be careful."

He offers a warm smile, but rolls his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. I'll be fine. Don't worry about me. See you at lunch tomorrow."

Your attempt to mimic his expression falls flat as he shimmies back into the vent and on his way.

You didn't know how accurate your instincts would be.

The next day, you make your way to the lunch hall. You're late- your lab testing ended up being longer than possible. But when you enter the dining hall, Minho's absence is quickly noted.

Though, you do spot Newt. Maybe Minho's running has gone overtime, again?

"Newt-" you shout him, jogging across the hall. "Have you seen Minho? We need to talk to you."

Newt doesn't even have to say anything as he glances at Thomas, whose eyes are burning into the table in front of him. There's some sense of desperation in Newt's expression, mixed with grief and regret, but like he can't say anything.

It makes your stomach flip and your heart stop as you open your mouth to speak, but you don't get any sound out.

"(Y/N)." Janson's annoying voice sends a chill down your spine as you turn to look at him. Two guards stand by his sides, his forced grimace doesn't reach his cold, unforgiving gaze. "I need a word."

Janson gestures for you to walk with him and you swallow a lump in your throat. Your first instinct is to run. Like Minho thought you. But in a room full of people? It's not like your quiet escapades in the middle of the night.

Your feet are like concrete as you force yourself to walk towards him.

Janson walks in front of you, the guards behind you. You're trapped, and even if you did run, that wouldn't change anything as he leads you into a room. It's a room you're familiar with.

It's where you have one-on-one progress conversations with Janson to discuss how you're doing. Minho spent more time in here than you ever did, but that doesn't mean the confines space doesn't fill you with anxiety, even in normal circumstances.

You take your place in the cold chair as Janson sits across from you, the slab of metal that is meant to be a table keeping you separated feels like a godsend. Though, not much of one with the guards breathing down your neck.

"...Where's Minho?" You manage to croak, attempting to mimic your missing friends confidence.

"He's been dealt with." Janson says, and your blood runs cold.

"What- what does that mean?"

"I'm sure you already know what that means. From your adventures last night." The world stops.

You knew.

You knew it was a bad idea and your own insecurities led you to keeping your mouth shut and hiding away from your concerns. What? Because of a stupid crush? Your own feelings of inadequacy have led to Minho's demise. And it's soul-crushing.

"I-I don't understand." You words falter, any false confidence quickly shattering.

"It's a shame. Really. It is." Janson nods as he leans forward, his elbows on the table. "We let yours and Subject A7's strange relationship slide because it was showing promising results. New waves in the Killzone we were examining. I knew we should've stopped it." He sighs. "...and now, you know too much."

"Where is he?" You spit, fists clenched, unused adrenaline causing you to tremble.

"I told you." Janson hisses. "You already know. But don't worry. You're not going to remember any of this." Janson nods towards the guards.

"What-" your words catch at a sharp sting in the side of your neck as one of the masked-men injects a burning liquid into you. You gasp, grasping the side of your neck. "What have you done?"

Your words slur slightly as a dull buzz fizzles into your vision, your head feeling light.

"My job." Janson leans back as he watches you sway in your seat. "What was always going to happen."

You can't even respond as your limp body slips out of the seat, and your consciousness leaves you before you even hit the floor.

WHOOP WHOOP. 1K BABYYYYY.

I guess this is my 1k follower post - and it's angst. That's typical of me. Sorry for the massive gap since I last posted something, but everyone's support has given me a drive to write. Well, at least finish writing this. Sorry if its not everything you wanted, but I've always felt there's something so much sadder about not getting that chance to say goodbye to someone, and things fizzing out instead of a bang.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed :)

[yoitsjay]

(This is a screenshot of the original ask because for some reason my drafts glitched out and instead of editing the tumblr it posted it when it wasn't ready and I had to delete it, so whoever requested this I am sorry! And I hope you read this and like my story!

Cuddle Buddies

Pairings: Simon "Ghost" Riley x M!reader

Summary: you and Simon have always had your differences, but the one thing you did have in common was the fact that you couldn't go to sleep without being in each other's arms every night. So, you and him made a habit of cuddling every night.

Warnings: fluff, touch starved? Confessions

Word count: 1621

December had settled in after a long and dreadful November, luckily enough for the soldiers, December was their month off from work. Some soldiers left, Soap went away for a bit to spend Christmas with his family, he had invited you and Ghost but you didn't Really know soap that well so you declined. You had been a recruit for the 141 for about a year before you finally “graduated” in the eyes of the team and became their combat medic. Your family lived all the way up in Northern Canada and you were all the way in London so there was no cheap way to see them, so instead you stayed on base and face timed with your family.

It was the day before Christmas eve and you were on the phone with your mother, it was late, maybe about 11 pm for you whilst it was much earlier for your family as there was a 7 hour time difference. It was just you, Ghost and a few recruits on base so it was very quiet, quiet enough that you could hear a pin drop from another room entirely. So when you heard footsteps approaching your barracks you said some goodbyes To your family and promised to call them for Christmas.

You set your phone down on your night table after the call ended, running a hand through yours freshly washed hair, it had definitely been a while since you really had a good scrub down so the shower you had taken the night before really made you feel good…

A sudden knock on your door broke you from your thoughts and you stood up from your bed, making your way to the door before opening it. And much to your unsurprise it was a recruit. “Sir- Ghost asked me to fetch you, he's in his quarters.” the recruit relayed before walking away. A sigh escaped your lips and you returned back to your bed, grabbing your phone before heading towards Ghosts bedroom.

See, for months you and Ghost teased each other back and forth, at first he was just straight up bullying and you wouldn't react, but as soon as you hit the three month mark of being a rookie, which was typically where rookies bailed, you started reciprocating the same energy back to Ghost and he took that as a personal challenge, so whenever you were around each other you would bicker and insult each other.

However one night during a game of very drunk poker, you had passed out against Ghost and he had taken you to your room to sleep, however you wouldn't let him go, and that started your almost daily routine. When everyone else was asleep Ghost would send a recruit for you or send you a text, and the moment you entered his room you were in his bed. It was nothing sexual, intimate but not sexual. But every night you and Ghost would hold each other, and on bad nights you would cradle him to your chest and tell him stories to make him forget about whatever dream or nightmare had plagued him that night.

Tonight was no different. You were cuddle buddies now, supposedly.

Or maybe it was different.

When you reached his bedroom you had heard some shuffling from behind the door, followed by a grunt and a curse from the British man's lips. You raised an eyebrow, knocking on the door to alert him of your presence. “Ghost? You're gonna let me in or what?” You asked in a joking tone. “Hold on! Wait a minute.” He replied back to you and some more shuffling could be heard before finally Ghost opened the bedroom door a few minutes later. However before you could see what he was doing Ghost tied a blindfold around your eyes. You jolted at the sudden blindness and the larger man let out a soft apology, taking one of your hands in his while his other hand went to your hip as he guided you into his room, making you stand in a certain spot before he closed the bedroom door and came back to you, gently untying the cloth around your eyes.

When you saw what he had done to his bedroom your jaw was on the floor. He had candles lit and strewn about the room, his bed was neatly made (which it never is) but on top of that there was a large tray of your favorite food. But that wasn't even the most shocking thing. Ghost was standing in front of you in just a T-shirt and sweats, he had his Balaclava on of course but no black makeup surrounded his eyes. You could also see the tattoo on his arm alot better and honestly you loved it. You had a few tattoos of your own but not a sleeve.

“Ghost wha-”

“Simon.” He blurted out, his eyes reflecting nervousness almost as he looked at you. His interruption baffled you as you blinked at him once before opening your mouth again to speak. However once again he beat you too it.

“call me Simon. Please.” He muttered to you, clearing his throat before grabbing your hand and leading you to his bed. He sat you down, pushing the tray towards you. He was quiet, more quiet than usual. He always had something smart to say but- not now. “Simon.” You whispered, and watched as he visibly got shivers by you just saying his name. You grabbed the tray of your favorite food, scooping up some of it on a spoon as you took a bite. This wasn't store bought, but homemade.

Your eyes went wide at the realization and you stared at Ghost- Simon. “Did you- did you make this?” You asked him, and all he did was nod. You could see him fidgeting, but he quickly tore your attention away from that as he spoke up again. “If you don't like it you don't have to eat it-”

You quickly interrupted him before he could say anything more, shaking your head. “No Simon it's delicious. I cant- I can't believe you remembered me ramble about this dish- how did you even find the recipe?” You asked, taking another bite from the dish, well- more than one, you were absolutely devouring this dish. “I uh- I found your moms Facebook and I contacted her for the recipe. She's a very kind woman- gave it to me immediately…” He trailed off, watching as you devoured the meal.

You finished it quickly, placing the food tray on Simon's bedside table before turning to him again. However instead of saying anything you pulled him into a crushing hug. Which he actually reciprocated. “Thank you Simon.” You whispered.

You don't know why he had done all of this for you, but as you and him lay down together and you rest your head on his chest, you can hear just how much his heart is racing, even hearing it skip a beat when you adjust your hand or touch his chest. Was he sick? You had no clue.

Silence filled the room, it wasn't comforting, no the way Simon was acting, or more so how he wasn't acting was off-putting. So you abruptly sat up, shifting your body so you now sat atop his lower abdomen. You stared down at him into his widened eyes, and you huffed. “Spill it Riley, what's got you so weird today? Are you sick or something?” You asked him, leaning forward as you placed your hands on his face to try and feel if he had a fever or something. Simon then grabbed your wrists, keeping you in place as he stared up at you, but in one swift motion you were on your back and he was on top of you, his face extremely close to yours, Close enough to feel his breath filter through the mask and fan across your face. It smelt like mint, and chocolate. “Simo-”

you couldn't even blurt out his full name as he pulled the mask up over his nose and he kissed you, moving his hands from your wrist to your hips instead. You were in shock, eyes wide and lips somewhat Agape. He pulled away after a few minutes, his expression now worried that he pushed you too far. “Y/n?” He called out your name, squeezing your hip gently.

You blinked once… twice… you looked up at him as you licked your bottom lip, taking the remnants of whatever lip chap he had on. You sucked in a deep breath, moving your hand up to his bare cheek. He flinched slightly, but didn't pull away as you gently felt the lower half of his face, your hand traveling to the nape of his neck where you rested your hand there for but a moment before pulling him against your lips again, reciprocating the kiss that he had given you less than a minute ago.

Simon melted into your touch as he held you and kissed you, hundreds of bottled up feelings smashing into you like the dam that held it all in broke. After a few moments he pulled back, staring into your eyes. No words needed to be said, and this time he got comfortable beside you with his face pressed to the crook of your neck, his mask was still up over his nose, which was good enough for you.

His arms around your waist, his face against your neck and the feeling of his hot breath against your skin, combined with the food you had ate had started to make you sleepy. And within moments you had drifted off with Simon following suit.

Cuddle Buddies indeed.

[kitofawriter]

So I watched the first two episodes since they’re in English now. Live reaction:

LMK Season 5 spoilers under the cut:

Fun training session! Let’s go!

Tired MK is tired. Somebody get this boy the therapy he needs!

Wukong is trying to be responsible about the monkey form at least.

“I’m compartmentalizing!” XD me too MK, me too

MAC MAC MAC!!!! Also “Bud” not in a mocking way!!!!

“This mountain’s been by home just as long as yours” I’m screaming!!!

They’re working together! (Sorta)

Wukong confirming he didn’t know about MK!

Referencing Mac’s death and resurrection!

Ominous stone crack!!

Mei!! My girl!!!

THEY BUILT HIM A NEW HOUSE!!!!

Tang continuing the tradition of shirking the hard labor. Good to see he’s still himself.

THE PICTURES!!!

The origami!!

Even Mo gets a picture!!

HUG HUG HUG!!!

MK please chill, like even 2% calmer would be a major improvement. You need to rest and get therapy.

“Sleeping with the noodles”

Dadsy give him some comfort. Also send him to therapy. Or teach him cooking.

MK backstory! Noodles! Sleepy noodles!!!! That is so cute oh my god!!

MK is a heavy boi. Also sleepy.

“I love you, son” I am not emotionally prepared for the sheer amount of MK and Pigsy fluff in the last two minutes.

Mac sleeping with the little monkeys!!! At the tree!!!

Spooky goings on. References to Monkey King getting kidnapped to the underworld perhaps??

Stop blaming the monkeys for the things they’ve been trying to stop please. That’d be great. MK needs a nap. You could’ve waited for him to sleep.

Wukong throwing shade about the underworld situation. You tell ‘em!

Smug smile. Good monkey.

Mac canonically appears in the Monkey King Ace Attorney TV show? What?

Fillet?? Fillet??? Nezha?!? “Nezhie”?!??!?

Li Jing, hey, can’t say it’s a pleasure to meet you. Maybe take some parenting classes and then we’ll talk.

Mac trying to stop the fillet!!!

MK losing it a bit at that, love the concern for Wukong! They is a family!!!

Also Nezha trying to plea for them!

Underworld jail.

Grumpy Wukong and mopey Mac, I can just feel all the angst fics being written.

MK is trying so hard to free his mentor!

“It’s tense in here.” Gee I wonder why.

Secret plan with the fur? Secret plan with the fur? The nods?!

(I think I should interject here to point out, I rarely watch things without also doing something else to distract my hands, and yet my crochet has been forgotten because I’m having so many thoughts!)

Nezha providing exposition

Tang!Wukong, glasses is a must

Painted art style my beloved it’s good to see your return!

“My father is not the enemy” I mean he’s not exactly a pillar of goodness either my dude.

“I’m a clone”

Okay the running animation bit was actually pretty nice, love the movement. I like how they’re really trying to keep close to the original style of animation even though they’re working with a totally different tool set.

Mac, are you…are you Naruto running?

Wukong keeps doing the cutest smiles. I’m gonna have to go back through and grab some many screenshots.

Wukong and Mac just…knowing exactly how to fight together with no communication when they’re actually both on the same side.

Sandy got a new truck…

…And it’s gone, poor guy

MK worried that they’re just the harbingers of chaos when they have directly caused so few of the problems they’ve faced. Like, I get it, but maybe have some perspective. You know what would help with that? Therapy.

Just don’t explain anything. It’s fine. They’ll figure it out.

MK building powers!!

Fillet use!! Mac stepping in!! Mac sacrificing himself?!?!? Oh the angst fics will be legendary!!

“He always gets away, right?” Followed by sad face?!? OH THE ANGST FICS WILL BE LEGENDARY!!!

Monkey in pagoda. This feels familiar.

I’m sensing a later “boiling rock” style episode. Or else they all get trapped in there and have to bust out (Nezha helping them escape possibly?)

That was so good! I can’t wait for the actual proper release for better audio quality and more importantly MORE EPISODES!!

[fumifooms]

Marchil crumbs part 5

Part 1 - Part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 6 - part 7

The anime has come and since I have my shipping goggles on I am going to notice so much. This part will be less spoilery for anime onlys (tho if you want to see me talk about why I ship them and why they’re complementary this is not a good part to start with haha). Edit: After completing this part I can confirm it’s fully anime-onlys friendly and spoiler-free! For manga veterans though there are still some fun tidbits to be found, some recontextualisations and new extra content.

Holy shit guys they’re mirroring each other in the mural and reaching out to each other AND looking towards each other?!!!! Their pose is so striking and like perfectly align?! Which means it was so intentional and the staff wanted to highlight them (for an aesthetic and/or narrative purpose I’m sure but it happened)! I will never let this go we won so fucking hard let’s goooooo we are so back

Character foils!! Dynamic duo!!

Soulmates!!

In the opening at 1:16 he looks at her to see if she’s really going to it as the most critical of monster food & muster up courage to dig into it himself lmao… "Marcille doesn’t look too grossed out, she’s picky so this food must be fine then" Aka treating her as a poison taster/good cuisine judge lmao

Doodle from the animation director (source). I should translate it but I’m procrastinating on it so uh director’s brotp? Anyways they hanging out look at them :]

Laios is thinking to himself there (he’s the one saying the subs), and in the meantime Marcille and Chilchuck talk, likely figuring out the money situation. Strategizing duo back at it again not wasting a second

In the beginning of ep 1, when Marcille is rambling about where they could go to get food and what to grab, Chilchuck listens with a big smile & even closes his eyes as they walk. The implication is that he’s thinking about food, but man the scene hits different now that it’s voiced and I remember that indeed Chilchuck is closing his eyes to her voice and enjoying hearing her talk and ramble. I may be too far gone into the marchil pit

I feel like already they’ve come far from when Chilchuck dreaded being alone with Shuro and Marcille, waiting for the Toudens and Namari to arrive.

Ok this might actually be smth I’m gonna complain about but I feel like blushes have been drawn too vividly so far. Why does Chilchuck look like he’s confessing when he tells her she’s not a burden and he didn’t mean to make her feel that way. It almost comes across as "Woah she cares what I think?" 💀 The banter ensuing is of course also great

Ep 2 was an episode centered on them both that had the "Magic/Traps are my domain, don’t interfere!" parallel… And now with ep 3 we’re back to them being haters together. That’s her emotional support man

In ep 4, it doesn’t show well with a screenshot but when Senshi talks about his unmanned vegetable stand with a treasure chest, while in the manga Marcille and Chilchuck both think the same thing, "That’s why that treasure chest akways had money in it…", but in the anime instead they literally finish each other’s thought. Talk about being on the same wavelength.

Ep 5 is a marchil goldmine actually, it showcases perfectly how much of a package deal they are lol. Always sticking close to each other. Glancing at each other during meals… They literally nod at each other before they try a bite to steel themselves. They exchange a serious thoughtful glance when Laios talks about Falin truly being gone atm. They argue a bit but they go right back to sitting right next to each other after the meal <3 My god I can’t deal with them they are so…… "Hate this bitch, not my friend" 3 secs later "Heyy bestie!!" Also he’s worried he brought her mood down after mentioning Falin. Made a post about ep 5 collecting even more screenshots.

Episode 6 my hero my beloved… Again I made a post about the ep collecting all my screenshots here, and even a clip! But this IS the marchil crumbs masterpost thus I must collect the major ones here as well. First of all, fun staff drawings for the first screening!

I already posted a screenshot from the trailer of when Chil had his head on his knees sitting next to her, but after seeing episode 5 I think it’s a fun and interesting trend to notice that they sit next to each other way unnecessarily close wow. They continue to banter a ton, she continues to be very casual with touch, and they’re really cute! I love just how much Marcille blushed damn- It’s really cute too when you remember with the bicorn chapter that Chilchuck teases Marcille BECAUSE he enjoys getting a rise out of her, flustering her and seeing her reactions. I support the teasing -> laughing because her reaction is over the top all-Chilchuck economy. Also she apologizes for having let him go alone and be gone for so long by helping him with sewing his cowl… Cuties

She looked so happy when he opened up about his age!… And then seemed… Disappointed? When he "truly was just a kid". "So you really are a kid! How boring…" This implies that her intent was to tease him for funsies… Ok lads we reached 30 pics see you next post, I’m gonna cover the "wake up clumsy head" manga-anime differences and we’re gonna go back to our usual spoilers yummy schedule.

Here’s Marcille cosplaying as a succubus in the newest Daydream Hour… She may not be a half-foot or have deep-set eyes but let’s be real I think he’d explode

part 6 here!!

[luvrrgirl444]

chapter 9: isn’t she beautiful

IRL, INSTAGRAM & TWITTER!

about an hour or two later, you and your friends had finally arrived back to your shared home. once arriving home, you immediately made your way to bedroom, not before giving each of your best friends a goodbye kiss on the cheek.

as soon as you closed your bedroom door, you facetime called eren. you threw your ringing phone onto your bed and started to look for something more comfortable to wear.

“hello?” the deep accented voice flowed through the phone, into your ears.

you smiled. “hold on! i’m changing,”

you put on some hello kitty sweats, along with a plain baggy tshirt. you grabbed your phone and looked at the guy displayed on your screen.

“hi” you said while grinning.

“hey” he replied back.

you walked into your bathroom and placed your phone onto the counter.

“i’m so tired.” you sighed, taking your pink headband and putting it on.

“what’s got you so tired?” he asked. “was it the car ride?”

you nodded and reached for your face cleanser. you squeezed some of the product onto your hand and started to rub it into your face.

“those two are children, i swear.” you said with an eye roll.

“what about you?” you continued, “how are you feeling?”

he sighed. “i’m alright. a bit stressed, but talking to you is making me feel better.”

you looked to the camera and gave him an ‘are you serious?’ look before rolling your eyes and laughing.

“you’re so fucking corny.”

he smiled widely, displaying his pearly smile. “you tell me that all the time.”

you turned on your sink and washed the cleanser off.

“am i boring you?” you asked with a quirk of your eyebrow.

he shook his head. “quite the opposite actually. i like watching you put all of that different shit on your face.”

you jokingly gasped. “it’s called skincare, you dumbass.”

since it was the end of the week, you decided to do a face mask. you picked up your two favorite ones and shoved them into the camera.

eren got the hint and chose one, and watched as you opened it and applied some to your face with a brush.

the way he watched you apply your face mask like it was the most interesting thing in the world was enough to make butterflies erupt in your stomach.

“it’s not really that interesting, y’know.”

“but you’re doing it. so i’m interested.”

you rolled your eyes and continued applying until your whole face was covered.

“okay, how do i look?” you asked him, while posing.

“beautiful.” he said before taking a screenshot.

“i’m gonna fucking kill you.”

🫧

- i suck at writing moments w just eren and y/n but they r so cute im jealous

taglist !! : @greeniegreengreen @hahaimnotdeadyet @bakuhoes-bxtch @itzgabz22 @princess-jaeger @marsandsaturn @violenthots @urlovemaze @conniesbbymama @llovergirlll @iheartamajiki @444yeager @liliorsstuff-blog @hoohoohope

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Mini costume meta

Gonna throw in a very mini costume meta because now I’ve got a proper look at Bucks velvet jacket I am having a lot - and I mean a lot of feelings about it.

For starters this jacket is not maroon - it is burgundy and that is an important distinction. maroon is a more brown toned colour while burgundy is a more red and purple toned colour and they have very different meanings. 

I’m not sure how easily you can see it from these two pictures, but the tee Buck wears when he tells Christopher about Eddie getting shot - in 4x14 - is much more brown toned, while the velvet suit jacket has much more of a purplish tone to it (i’m hoping for better pictures of the suit jacket when the episode actually airs as the screenshots I grabbed are not the best!!)

So Like I’ve said in previous metas, maroon has been used in scenes where a character is taking on some form of parental role - this is something thats been going on since season 1 and its been used on pretty much all the characters. Buck telling Chris about the shooting is the most obvious example, but Eddie in the last episode when Buck went over to the Diaz house was making Christopher's lunch - a parental thing. We’ve also seen Bobby in maroon a fair amount when he’s needed to step into a parental role - think back to Bobby telling Harry he needed to clear the table - that he couldn’t be best buddy Bobby anymore, and needed to be step dad Bobby and so on. 

Maroon is thought to promote comfort and warmth, it is also a colour of strength and maturity - all things associated with parenthood. It is also a colour often associated with drying blood which connects it to the idea of blood ties - which equals family ties.

Then we have burgundy - a colour of sophistication. It’s a powerful colour commonly associated with refinement - stemming from the idea that a Burgundy wine is among the best and most expensive in the world. This association also means Burgundy is associated with wealth - the perfect colour for Buck to be wearing while he’s winning at poker!

The other thing about burgundy though is that it is also associated with lust, passion and desire - it is a colour very much connected with romance and deep love as it is a deep form of red!

Combined with the black of the rest of the outfit, including the black wide peaked satin lapels, which is a colour of elegance, sophistication, power and seduction, as well as the choice of velvet and satin for the blazer - two fabrics considered to be symbols of wealth luxury and sophistication I think it’s safe to say that this outfit is very much an outfit one would chose for a date. Peaked lapels are an interesting choice - they are the most difficult lapel to achieve and are considered the mark of an accomplished tailor - hinting at the idea that Buck has been on a difficult journey, but will achieve success with it. it can also hint at him being accomplished at cards!

Its also worth mentioning that velvet as a word is a slang term for money acquired through gambling 👀👀👀 

Last thing to note is that Eddie is not the only one wearing a new and more blingy watch - Buck is also wearing a new one - we only get a couple of very brief glimpses and I’m hoping we’ll see a bit more of it once the episode airs, but I am very literally screaming over it. (you can see a tiny glimpse in the still below)

Buck has had the same watch since season 1 - no deviations, just the same watch! and now - now we get a new one! Post dying, post coma dream, post Buck going to the Diaz house and sleeping on the couch and post Buck appearing all contemplative and figuring things out at the end of last episode we see Buck in a new watch!!!!

The fact that they both appear to be wearing metal watches means we have the possibility that their watches are going to potentially match up, because metal watches are more showy and confident - they’re less practical (especially if you’re a fire fighter) and are therefore much more about making a statement of some sort. Them both wearing them for the first time at the same time is a choice! Not to mention the fact that while Eddies watch is out and proud - on display for everyone to see, Bucks is mostly hidden - we only get to see a tiny part of it for a moment. The idea that Eddie is confident and essentially putting this new version of himself out there for people to see, while Buck is ‘on the same page’ but still mostly hiding his new self - he’s still uncertain about it etc is a choice - especially as we’ve seen watch theory around Buck expand much more this season than previously! I should also mention the fact that the show very loudly made a big thing about Michael buying David a watch as an engagement gift - rather than a ring - and we don’t see any other (male)  characters wearing metal watches, so for them to choose now to put Eddie in a metal watch as well as possibly Buck is making a very purposeful connection!!

I really can’t wait to see if we’re going to get more of these watches - if we do I’m expecting we’ll only see them connected to Buddie developments and that they’ll revert to their normal watches for other non work scenes (I’m expecting the brown leather strap watch for whatever date(s) Pepa has set Eddie up on!!)!

[absent-o-minded]

YR S2 Trailer Talk (Pt.1)

My, my has it been a fair whack of time since I last did one of these. The release of the S3 Trailer was like being opened from my rustic tomb, so I thought that I would do an analysis/thought/prediction post ! (Also - Please excuse the quality of the screenshots x the red play bar):

The Lake (Continuous):

As we know from previous seasons, the lake's function has been situated as place of solace for its location outside of the royal, institutional and domestic spaces. It is both meditative and reflective.

In S1, the lake was one of the only occasions where the boys were not just happy (a rare instance) but also where they were afforded a sense of privacy (even if it was the illusion of privacy). It's on school-grounds, so it is somewhat controlled, but Malin was also there. Here, I get the impression that they might actually be on their own. The shot is so serene, with the golden-green landscape refracting off of the water, and the boys' silhouettes slightly obscured.

We also got a snapshot of this scene from the teaser pictures, where Wille and Simon were floating atop the water, and they were sort-of peacefully basking in the Sun. The lake has been consistent throughout the seasons: Season 1 was Winter, Season 2 was Spring (I think?), and so Season 3 may be the Spring-Summer transition (although I am aware that people are wearing coats and jackets during the trailer). If so, a change in season similarly ushers in social/cultural change, or anticipates a transition. In Summer coming around, tensions rise with the heat, and the pressure amps up.

Importantly, the lake shows up multiple times throughout the trailer:

The hammock clip looks incredibly domestic and peaceful, which is nice to see, considering the arc that Wille and Simon have been on in order to get to this point. It's something simple and perhaps (on appearance) not particularly narratively potent, but it is important if we consider the lake to be a place of nostalgia. The Wille and Simon who lounge here in Season 3 are different versions of the lads that they were in Season 1. And honestly? I think that they're going to grab at any moments of peace they can get without the looming presence of the press.

Ohohoheheheheuegeuhuege- The big questions !

As well as being a place of tranquility, the lake provides an open space for Wille and Simon to talk without constraints. We have seen Simon be critical of the monarchy since S1, but (I think) that this is the first time where Simon openly directs his criticism to Wille and asks him outright. However, what I'm more interested in is what he follows it up with: "I've seen how it makes you feel."

Now, this could very well just be Simon remarking on how Wille has been in the past. He's seen him scared, stressed, worried, angry etc. But, it makes me wonder if this might be an inclination of Simon seeing it at it's worst with Wille's anxiety (and by extension - His panic attacks). Maybe Wille has fully let Simon in? Maybe he's shown him what he's been afraid to let anyone help him with?

Also - Simon is wearing what looks to be his purple shirt in this shot, which makes me think that this could possibly come after the palace visit?

(Pretty sure that this is the lake so we're gonna go with it-)

The thing that is honestly ripping my brain apart is that this could be a response to a NUMBER of different things. In the trailer, it comes after Kristina says: "You supposed to be able to take over from me." But there could be a chance that this ^ is in response to something else:

You have to maintain a traditional image. What if I don't want to?

You have to choose. What if I don't want to?

You have to stop fighting. What if I don't want to?

The options are endless.

(Also, Wille is wearing the same coat here as he is in the hammock frame above ^^.)

First of all, the trailer really is indulging us in some beautiful shots. Look at this lovely composition of land x water in a wide.

Secondly, my word. It seems remarkable that something as simple as this shot could summarise the goal of 3 entire seasons, because surely, this is it? This is all they wanted? The both of them, with a picnic, by a lake, with the sunset. That is all. None of the grandeur. None of the drama. None of the unwanted extras. Just this.

Which is why the next two shots appear more unnerving:

It looks so picturesque...and then we get these two close-ups. It's one of the few instances we receive where Wille and Simon are sharing a fraught moment and openly reacting to it in front of each other. They are unified in their experiences. But really, how else do you try to articulate what you and someone else have gone through in the past year? How do you explain that to someone who isn't either of you two?

No one else would have been under the same scrutiny or the same institutional rigidity or even the same stress as they have been forced to get through in just a number of months. They have both suffered, from the hands of others, as well as the hands of each other. There have been moments where hope was high, as well as moments where the end was not in sight.

And again, we're back at the lake. It persists. The sun is setting and so it’s late in the day. But it’s still this continuous, emblematic thread that connects interrelated sequences and bares witness to everything that goes on. It’s almost like an omniscient location.

I don't think that they would have shown anything from Ep 6 in the trailer, purely on the basis that it's separate from the other episodes. I could be wrong, but this seems like it would happen at the end of an episode, maybe episode 5? I'm unsure of how you could transition away from this because summarises the whole relationship. I can't say if Wille's "Is everything okay between us?” comes from this scene, because I just get the impression that they understand each other. The tears, the looks, the furrowed brows, the positions, it all seems like they have a mutual understanding that evades the need for speech. Perhaps it’s less of a checking in and more of a rhetorical question. Will it be okay?

_________

This part solely focussed on the lake so I'm hoping to write another post discussing other elements of the trailer. Nonetheless, I am very excited ! Anxious and sad to see it go, but I’m so happy that I was here for the whole ride and will see it to the end !

[heymacy]

Macy!! Hi!!

Thoughts on YQHBR Ian booping Mickey? <3

DRISH! HI!!!

boy oh boy do i have thoughts. in fact, i even wrote a little something about it 😉 i give you, YQHBR: boop edition

**

Mickey stretches, twists his torso and legs like he’s wringing out a sponge. Bleary eyes blink awake, squinting against the sunlight beaming through his window.

He sighs. Good morning.

It’s April 1st. The day of fools. He already feels like a fool, if he’s being honest, every day of his life. But that’s something he can sort through later. Right now he has some catching up to do.

He rolls over in bed and grabs his laptop where it rests on the dresser. He pulls it into his lap, flipping open the screen and waiting for it to light up. When it does, it’s less than a minute before he’s logged into tumblr.

What….what the fuck?

There’s something new on his screen, right at the very top. It isn’t an ad, at least he doesn’t think so. He clicks it, hesitant, and nothing happens.

Hm. Strange.

He decides to consult the one tumblr expert he knows.

fcku-up: what the fuck is this thing on my dash eternitysgate: good morning to you too, sunshine

It’s been a week and a half since they’d started talking. They were friends now — not IRL, but something close — and talked nearly every day. It was becoming an integral and beloved part of Mickey’s daily routine.

Ian had been on tumblr longer than anyone Mickey knew. Except maybe Cassie. But he wanted to talk to Ian.

eternitysgate: it’s called boop eternitysgate: i think it’s an april fools thing eternitysgate: they do something like this almost every year eternitysgate: one year you could spam people’s pages with digital crabs fcku-up: crabs? eternitysgate: yep. little orange crabs fcku-up: lovely fcku-up: so what do i do? eternitysgate: click “opt in”

Mickey does as he’s told. Waits. A few minutes later, he checks his notifications.

eternitysgate, staysmashed, oliviasmiddlepart, and 6 others boop boop boop

He takes a screenshot, crops it, and sends it to Ian.

fcku-up: explain eternitysgate: lmao eternitysgate: who else booped you?

Mickey checks. Cassie twice, Victor, Liv, Zoe, and Ian 4 times.

fcku-up: you, mostly eternitysgate: excellent 😇 eternitysgate: now you boop back fcku-up: this is silly eternitysgate: boop me back, bitch 👊🏻 fcku-up: 🙄 eternitysgate: go to my blog, click the little paw. but don’t accidentally unfollow me or i’ll cry for a thousand years fcku-up: 🖕🏻

Mickey clicks on Ian’s username and opens his blog. There, in the navigation section, is a little orange paw. He clicks it.

You’re about to boop eternitysgate

And then, below it, in a purple oval,

boop

He sighs. Clicks it. A tiny green box shows up at the bottom of the screen, altering him to the fact that his boop had been sent through.

eternitysgate: BOOP BOOP BITCH fcku-up: you are a child eternitysgate: I AM A GOD eternitysgate: you don’t understand mick, i’ve been doing this for an hour and a half and i’ve never felt more alive fcku-up: happy for you eternitysgate: oh come on, you know you love it eternitysgate: now go boop cassie back or she’ll come whining to me about it fcku-up: FINE 🙄

** 

It’s been two hours and, much like Ian, Mickey has never felt more alive. He’s been booping almost the entire time, his meter ticking up, up, up. He’s booping friends, mutuals, strangers, people he’s seen in his notifications and people he’s never seen before in his life. Anyone and everyone.

He and Ian are in what the user base has declared a “boop war” — flooding each other with boops, not caring if the other person boops back first. It’s madness and Mickey can’t stop laughing.

There are memes now. Viral posts made mere minutes ago. He’s never seen anything like it, never been a part of anything like it.

eternitysgate: boop me again and i’ll fly to chicago and boop you IRL fcku-up: is that a threat or a promise? eternitysgate: both

Mickey bites back a grin. 

eternitysgate: do you think they’re gonna keep this around after the day is done? fcku-up: idk, maybe fcku-up: part of me hopes they do eternitysgate: it would be a never-ending war eternitysgate: wake up every morning, ride into battle fcku-up: eventually you’d admit defeat eternitysgate: HA! not likely

It goes on like that for hours. They talk for the entire day. It isn’t all about boops, little tidbits slip in between the cracks – what did you have for lunch? how’s your sister? do you have to work tonight? – but the main focus is this inane game they’re playing, this innate sense of bonding they’re experiencing with each other and everyone else.

Mickey can’t help but feel like he’s a part of something, finally. In this game, and in the grand scheme of things. He has friends. Mutuals. People that want to engage with him. Acknowledge him.

To see and be seen.

The sun set ages ago. Mickey is beneath the covers, laptop on his thighs. He boops Cassie, then Liv. Then goes and super boops Ian, followed by an evil boop. He wishes there was something higher than an evil boop, but alas. He decides to send another.

eternitysgate: stop evil booping me you bastard fcku-up: never shoulda told me to opt in, bitch eternitysgate: god i’m gonna miss this fcku-up: they might keep it eternitysgate: in case they don’t, i just want to say – it’s been a pleasure booping with you 🫡

Mickey smiles. Rolls his eyes. Can’t help but find Ian, as always, painfully endearing.

fcku-up: you too, nerd

[elsa-rain-world-stuff]

What got you into rainworld?

OHHOHHHOHOHOHOHO

It's been 2020, middle of autumn, i tired from playing same 3 games on repeat (hollow knight, sundered and undertale (? i'm not sure)) and looked in my steam library, in search for something i haven't played. I had i think 3 games i bought and never played, and Rain World was one of them. I had no fucking clue what is this game, i didn't even remember how i got it (i got it same year spring with 80% off, as my purchase history says). So i downloaded it and jumped right into, without watching any trailers or rewievs.

It was... something. I didn't expect anything, but i was surprised anyway. I had no idea you could pick different character, i didn't know you supposed to play as white slugcat, so i started as Monk.

First thing that surprised me is how HEAVY slugcat felt. Compare to Hollow Kinght where you can jump 10 times your height... yeahh. And second thing - controls, which i changed immediately, because i ain't playing on arrows! ALSO at the beginning i had a thought for a moment that maybe i'll get some upgrades, but even then i felt like it's not gonna happen

And after that i lost track of time. And when i woke up, it was 5 am and i was in shoreline. Then i was stuck in the first room of subterranean with centipedes killing me all the fucking time and i thought that i can't go back through the gates lol

I also remember miros birds breaking my overseer in meme crypts and how i thought that it was gone forever

This is my very first rain world screenshot (i didn't understand what to do with this flower and overseer seemed to point on it (at least it what i thought)

under cut there's a tonn of screenshots and some of messeges with my friend while i was playing. I had a friend, who helped me in the beginning. They played just a bit, but knew a lot about the game

october 10, 2020

Elsa Fogen 22:57 : Oh you can store food for the next day to spend all the time for exploration, neat Elsa Fogen 23:02 : So i was grabbed by that thing, that pretended to be a pole, but i managed to escape and it grabbed a lizard instead october 11, 2020 Elsa Fogen 6:57 : Fuuck, it's 5 am and i've been playing Rain all this time [Friend name here] 6:29 : How did you... Elsa Fogen 6:29 : I'm in the location with green wamter Elsa Fogen 6:31 : I was fucking flooded 3 times Elsa Fogen 16:13 : I'm fucking tired of these monkies They don't let me go through Fuckers

october 12, 2020

Elsa Fogen 18:11 : AAAAAAAAAAAHH FUCKING ELECTRICAL CENTIPEDES, I HATE YOU SO MUCH Elsa Fogen 18:14 : just fucking look how many times i died in the same room because of these fucking creatures

[Friend name here] 18:15 : Oh. Which location this is? Elsa Fogen 18:24 : trins where [Friend name here] 18:25 : no fucking way... Wait. WHY ARE YOU GOING THERE IT'S TOO EARLY Or wait. You have already been at Five Pebbles?!?! Elsa Fogen 18:27 : where???? I can't go back anyway......... [Friend name here] 18:27 : fuck... it's too early to go there/ Too early. Why can't you return? Elsa Fogen 18:33 : door was closed................... okay i get it all over again [Friend name here] 18:34 : nononno NO NO NO!!!! WAIT FUCK STOP WAIT WAAAAAAAIT DON'T RESTART LOTUS MOTHERFUCKER (lotus was kinda my roleplay nickname lol) DON'T YOU DARE Elsa Fogen 18:37 : wha how then [Friend name here] 18:34 : You talking about gates with karma? Elsa Fogen 18:38 : yes [Friend name here] 18:38 : Fuf... there... look. So you went through. You sleep one time. And you can go once again. Elsa Fogen 18:38 : 🤔

-----

Elsa Fogen 18:53 : Should i look for this thing?

Elsa Fogen 19:54 : What should i do here?

[Friend name here] 20:03 : GO TO SLEEP THEN YOU GO THROUGH HORRIBLE LOCATION TO THE WORSE Don't touch the flies Elsa Fogen 20:23 : And what if i touched them Elsa Fogen 21:43 : Damn it's so dark here

Elsa Fogen 21:54 : Damn there creepy creatures mechanical Elsa Fogen 22:40 : FUCK I SAW AN ART WHERE BROKEN VESSEL HAD THIS FUCKING BLACK-BLUE THING IN THE HEAD

[Friend name here] 23:01 : btw, you're ahead of me xD I just... i need to recover my nerves Elsa Fogen 23:05 : btw this thing that leads you can it be killed? [Friend name here] 23:05 : Yes. Elsa Fogen 23:05 : Fuck) I think mine was killed Elsa Fogen 23:10 : So what should i do if my thing was killed...... Elsa Fogen 23:15 : Are these things dangerous?

Elsa Fogen 23:24 : What a creepy fuckig thing

but it's neat i love their design so much i saw same things in the location with pile of monkies these fucking things annlyed me so much there was a lake and two of these fuckers lived there Elsa Fogen 23:56 : Fuck, can i kill this thing? It's sitting there and that's it............

[Friend name here] 23:56 : You can but.... MANY SPEARS. VERY MUCH. Elsa Fogen 23:59 : OMG OVERSEER, MY SUNSHINE

october 13, 2020

Elsa Fogen 00:00 : OH YES I MADE IT TO THE NEST [shelter] And i understood why the fuck these things for [grapple worms] Elsa Fogen 00:23 : THERE'S 3 OF THEM

Elsa Fogen 00:28 : That's what i call TOTAL FUCK UP

Elsa Fogen 00:31 : i lived Elsa Fogen 00:31 : is that a fucking infection

Elsa Fogen 01:03 : i n f e c t i o n

Elsa Fogen 01:23 : fUCK

Elsa Fogen 01:28 : ....how many spears i need to kill this you say?

[Friend name here] 01:28 : More than 10. :) Elsa Fogen 01:29 : too loose a concept "more than 10" more than 10 can be and 11 and 100 well, two already there ahaha....... [Friend name here] 01:28 : Well.... Hm...... Not 11... Well maybe 20 or more. Elsa Fogen 01:30 : now this sounds as threat of avengers level [Friend name here] 01:30 : One moment. I'll look up their hp. Ha.... Ha.... 200 hp.... Elsa Fogen 01:34 : ................... and how much damage spear does?? [Friend name here] 01:36 : ... [RW wiki screenshot saying how much damage deals every slugcat per spear throw] Elsa Fogen 01:34 : *HYSTERICAL LAUGH* okay i died already around ten times BY JUST FALLING IN THE FUCKING PIT

Elsa Fogen 01:34 : infected snot

Elsa Fogen 01:34 : f UCK i found the door, but it needs the highest karma AND I'M WITH THE LOWEST BECAUSE OF ALL THOSE DEATHS FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Elsa Fogen 02:19 : FINALLY FINALLY YES I WENT FURTHER OH MY FUCKING GOD I'M SO TIRED OF THIS PIT Elsa Fogen 02:21 : WAIT WHAT WHERE DID I FLY

IS IT BECAUSE I ATE TOO MUCH INFECTION? [Friend name here] 02:22 : Well it's... It's... If short, there's troubles with gravitation and... THERE'S MANY DADDY LONG LEGS ON THE WAY But first you have to bring around 4 flies to Moon)))) YES YES YOU'LL HAVE TO GO BACK BRING 2 FOR NOW There will be more further Elsa Fogen 02:25 : ah. these?

Elsa Fogen 21:11 : fuck this shit....

[Friend name here] 21:12 : ))))))) YOU'LL HAVE TO))))) Elsa Fogen 21:12 : no i'm leaving ahupzhvalvva [Friend name here] 21:12 : YEEEEES)))) YOU NEED THIS TO COMPLETE THE GAME By the way Moon quest is not necessary Elsa Fogen 21:14 : thank god

october 16, 2020

Elsa Fogen 20:59 : these fucking tentacles discourage all desire to play rain 🙁

Finding and translating all this takes fucking forever and after this point i moved to another chat and i don't know which one so let me know if you want to see more of this!!!!!!

LIKE REBLOG AND SUBSCRIBE FOR PART 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tadpolebobatea]

Live slug reaction (I am in shambles)

rip to Gina’s coffee… sorry girl

billy is unbearably silly… you two gotta put that kid on a leash, she’s like 5. You can’t be losing track of her…

it’s nice to have something other than anecdotal evidence that billy loves his kid

Tatiana really does come out swinging more often than not. My beloved bitchy preteen, she means the world to me. Let him have it girl!!!

(Tatiana randomly coming across betty gives major stand users are drawn towards each other energy)

Psychic soul memory of loving Japan from last loop perhaps, either way, it’s really cute :)

SENTIENT KINTO CLOUD????

I like to think Tellas internal thoughts here are just him really hoping he won’t have to restrain 2 4 star badasses from going full Rambo and tearing the city apart to find their kid (that or he’s deciding whether he should join them)

Veronica & Billy ^^^

Billy is insanely caring (but a moron) and Veronica is a “grab the shotgun if he cheats” kinda gal (but can evidently function as a human) . Therefore Tella is the much needed balanced individual in the polycule (COPING)

Billy is so fucking dumb I love him. He loves his family but he is very very silly with it. I can’t verbally express it so I’m just gonna use this

I guess betty must’ve inherited her daddy’s hearing. He’s pretty fucking far away here

(I didn’t screenshot it but betty shoulder checking billy into oblivion was great)

perfect recreation! Reaction shot included. This is so so so everything to me (MAN! Tozuka has really improved) This is so cool to me

Oi fictional crowd! You get the fuck away from my baby. It’s on sight, don’t piss me off. Give her some fucking room or I’m in favour of her vaporising you

This one’s a bit more of a stretch but it reminded me enough that I wanted to mention it. It’s like she’s wearing a babby version of fuukos dress

(or I’m reading into it too much and tozuka only has one dress he likes to draw)

FUUKO TATIANA HUG REAL! WE DID IT TEAM!!!! I AM IN SHAMBLES. My baby got to eat sweets, touch other people with her hands and hold a plushie (er mascot) oh man…

I’m feeling better this week, short recruitment chapter though. We’re maybe not finished?

[my-name-is-jefferooni]

Alright. Here’s a giant IDW Silver analysis that has been quite a while in the making. Prepare yourself.

WOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO I AM FINALLY GETTING TO THIS HUNK OF AN ANALYSIS AFTER PROBABLY A MONTH OR SO OF STALLING. For context, here’s the reblog where I mentioned I’d one day analyze Silver’s character in the IDW comics:

And now here is a disclaimer:

This is gonna be a huge, gigantic, mongo beast of an analysis! I don’t know how rushed the ending will be and I don’t know how many images will be included, because I took a lot, and I mean A LOT of screenshots! There is so much material to work with here, and I didn’t even include the annuals! So please, make yourself comfortable, grab a snack and some water, and enjoy the read! It’s most likely gonna be my longest one yet!

Oh and also there are gonna be some pretty big spoilers for the IDW Sonic comics so be sure to read it all before reading this. It’s all connected…

Now, without further ado, let’s get on with the show! Finally…!

———

Bruh. Before we even meet the guy, we can tell what kind of person Silver is. Before Sonic can land a hit on the robot, Silver cuts in, smashing the bot to pieces. And to me, the way he does it isn’t meant to be some basic way of taking out a badnik. When rereading the issue to get some good Silver material, I noticed how everything from the torso and onwards is smashed to pieces by Silver, whereas the rest of the robot is left just chilling on the ground. To me, this is Silver just neutralizing what is actually a threat, the blades, and taking notice of what is the threat and getting rid of it easily. First panel and we already see his perception skills in action!

We see more of it not too much later on in the issue when Sonic is pointing out what kind of powers were used to kill off the other badnik. Silver is leaning in closely, drinking in every words Sonic says, as if he’s learning some secret sensei technique or something! Silver is learning from Sonic about different wispon types and learning how to be more perceptive. Overall, Silver just likes to learn!

This part of his character makes a huge impact on himself as a whole! Silver is anything if not eager and naive, and that shows in a lot of what he does and the expressions he makes.

This is also where his admiration for Whisper comes into play. Silver adores Whisper at the start of his time in the comic, and aspires to be just like her as well as everyone else one day! She even saved his life! Why wouldn’t he wanna be like her?? All of this just shows how young and naive the white hedgehog is, and how much he truly doesn’t know. Silver doesn’t know how plants grow, he doesn’t know how people work, he doesn’t know anything! And this is where his obvious lack of social interaction comes in.

Silver spent a majority of his life without anyone to look up to. (Assuming the events of 06 did not take place and he really was on his own) He didn’t have any parents, no family, no friends, no home, nothing! The poor boy was completely on his own in a charred, desolate world full of nothing but despair. And throughout that time, he was almost helpless to stop it all. Silver knew there were still people out there in his time, knew there were people just trying to survive, and all he could do was take care of himself. He was starving, cold, and alone. No one came to save him because he could never save them.

This all grows inside Silver’s gut until it becomes just a big, ugly blob of loneliness. All his life, Silver desperately wanted, needed someone to be there for him, needed someone to hold him and tell him it’d all be okay. He needed a savior. So, to mask his insecurities, he finds saviors in Blaze, Sonic, and Whisper.

Yeah yeah, I know. Just shut up and we’ll get back to this in a moment.

All three of these characters saved Silver’s life at one point or another. Shadow did too technically, but we’re focusing on the IDW timeline here and Shadow hardly interacts with Silver in this comic so we won’t be talking much about him. ANYWHIZZLE, Silver holds these three in high regard, and looks up to them. He considers Blaze his first ever friend, (And as a Silvaze shipper I see them as an item) thinks of Sonic as a legendary hero, and sees Whisper as his Guardian Angel. All people whom he only knows due to his time traveling abilities. If he didn’t have the means to do time travel, he would never know these people and thus would never have any friends or family. He wouldn’t have any hope. And that’s why the connections Silver makes with others creates such a big part of his personality and it’s why he feels so “Off” in 06, because back in that nonexistent reality he only had Blaze. He had something, but it was hardly enough to keep him alive.

However, just like all of us, when you leave such insecurities to boil in your gut for such a long time, when you leave it to rot for so long, it eventually just kinda. Blows up on you. In your face. In front of everyone.

I don’t have many good examples without going into the next section so this is all you’ll get for now

Silver is a young, naive, complicated fool. He has so many things whirling around in his head all at once and it’s suffocating him. He doesn’t want to ruin anything for himself or for others, so he bottles everything up in hopes that it’ll all end up fine in the end. But when it does eventually explode on himself, he can’t help but make things worse for everyone else.

Take his short time with the Diamond Cutters, for example. He was dealing with a lot at the time, trying to juggle the stress of knowing his own time is safe while also wondering why he’s even back in the past. He doesn’t know what to do, and that all comes to a head when he suspects the worst about Duo. His suspicions are correct as we all know, but he doesn’t know that, and neither do the Diamond Cutters. He makes a mess of the Restoration HQ just to try and prove a point, which gets him booted from the team, and he can’t do anything afterwards except sulk in his garden.

In short, Silver tends to bottle up his emotions/problems until it all just explodes in his face and he then shuts down from all the intense feelings. He ends up confused, numb, and desperately needs guidance.

Now let’s move onto his power set, and OH BOY does this boy love to show off!

Silver is incredibly prideful in what he can do, and it most definitely shows when others praise him for it. However, there are some limits, and those limits are big!

Silver can only move things with his mind. It’s telekinesis, not pyrokinesis.

He needs to focus to be able to use his power.

Broski has auDHD

He also has anxiety

Welp. As you can see those are all some very big limitations.

When you have powers that can only function when you are focused and know what you’re doing, and when they also only work when you can see what you’re focusing on, well… It doesn’t really help you very much when you’re best friend and idol is a super speedy hedgehog that can go at Mach 7 if he feels like it. Silver’s insecurities combined with his anxiety and auDHD AND his survival instincts… They don’t mix too well. Don’t get it twisted though, he is still a master and psychokinesis and he uses his power shockingly well considering those circumstances. He can do so much cool shit with just his brain alone and it is insane! However, he can’t just do anything with it.

Just like what he says here! Haha~!

It also provides an explanation for this.

Silver just wasn’t focused during this time and was probably holding his own against a pretty big army of badnik already, so he wasn’t prepared for this funky little guy. Simple.

Now, back to his insecurities because YES THERE’S MORE. OF COURSE THERE’S MORE. THIS BOYO LIVED THROUGH AN APOCALYPSE FOR LIKE 13-14 YEARS OF HIS LIFE. OF COURSE THERE’S GONNA BE MORE.

Considering all these limitations and how quickly and easily Silver can lose focus, and also considering how young and naive he is, it’s safe to say Silver just can’t compare to all the others in the past.

Silver is always constantly comparing himself to them, always pushing himself to do better, digging himself into a rut deeper than the abyss. He looks up to all these people like they are more powerful than him, like they matter more than him, and that leads to him getting hurt more often than not.

LIKE. JUST. I KNOW THEY WERE LOW ON STAFF BUT JUST READ THAT AND TELL ME THAT DOES NOT SOUND LIKE A CASE OF IMPOSTER SYNDROME. LOOK AT ME DEAD IN THE EYES AND TELL ME THAT. POOR SILVER.

This all comes to a head though in the battle between Silver and… Uh… Whatever the depressed guy is called, the depresso Zeti guy.

In this fight, Silver is going up against someone who can only see the bad in people, who can only see a world of bleakness and despair. Depresso hates anything that is joyful, despises anything good in life, and only wants to see people be as sad as him. He’s a petty, pathetic loser.

But at one point, Silver was just like him.

Look at this and tell me this doesn’t give off the same vibes as the fight scene lol

But yeah! Silver was once as hopeless and depressed as Depresso over there! He had no hope for the future, had no way of knowing if anything was gonna be alright, had no one to look up to… Safe to say he was most likely worse than Depresso! But due to his age and the knowledge that there were still people out there, still families wandering in groups hoping for daybreak, he held onto what little hope he had left. He probably ended up saving a few people and they thanked him, and that probably gave him the push he needed to keep dreaming. Just as his own song Dreams of an Absolution suggests!

“Struggle, wriggle, writhe and cry! You can’t escape, you’ll soon be mine.”

That sounds like a certain someone’s depression talking~! And when Silver first attacks Depresso and says “I can be direct! Cover me!” That is Silver’s way of saying “I can’t do much against my own emotions without being upfront and blunt about it, but I also accept your help in fending them off. Will you help me if I accept such help??”

And when Depresso asks, “How can you be so disgustingly heroic and selfless??” Well, Silver responds with this:

“Because I have faith in others. I believe things will get better… And because I have a Guardian Angel watching over me!”

Silver got better, managed to fend off those dark thoughts that plague Depresso, because he is able to look up to people. He is so young and eager to learn that he doesn’t see anything bad in having faith in others and asking for help. He’s prideful in what he can do, but unlike Sonic and Shadow, his pride and insecurity doesn’t overshadow his willingness to learn and get help from others.

———

AND MAN. I WOULD ADD SO MANY MORE IMAGES IN THIS IF TUMBLR ALLOWED IT SO I WILL SAVE THE REST OF THIS ANLYSIS FOR A PART TWO.

Why? Well, because we’re literally on the very cusp of the ending for this thing (Finally) and I can’t just end this giant analysis off without adding any funny Silver pics! So please be patient while I come up with a part two for this whole thing. Such a shame I can’t add more images for now, but this will have to do.

THANK YOU SO SO MUCH FOR READING THIS GIANT-ASS POST. I KNOW IT TOOK YOU FOREVER TO GET HERE, AND I COMMEND YOU GREATLY FOR FINISHING THIS. Part two will be out soon hopefully so stay tuned for that!

[savelockwoodandco]

Hi Admin, hope everything is fine with you, because I truly need your insight.

Whilst I understand that we must approach a battle with high spirits, the way the world goes and with it the media industry really saddens me.

Are we really gonna get the show back?

Do we think CF or the Strouds will really tell us to stop if they think all is over?

I might be far too cynical, but for the Strouds any publicity brings more people to the books.

As for CF, it's still free publicity.

I know that of course none of them will ever be straightforward with us - if anything is happening behind the scenes - because they can't, I guess, but where does the Clowning stop and become simply Delusion?

I keep looking at CF reply for their 5000 followers, and I get it, it looks sus. But are we building a castle made of thin sand out of it?

I'm sorry, Admin, I don't want to upset you. :(

I will still support the show campaign, but I'm so, so, so sad about everything...

Hi Anon! Thanks for the question, and no worries, you didn't upset us! We've got decades of experience in this media game (and in cancellations specifically), and we understand that it can be challenging and frustrating at the best of times.

We totally get being discouraged due to the state of the media industry. It's never been a particularly kind nor relaxed space, and everything about it seems to have been heightened within the last decade or so. What's good -- acknowledging the impact that actors have, the ability to tell stories that would have gone unseen in years past, feeding fan interaction through behind-the-scenes looks while filming and the newfound safety of transformative works (i.e., fanfic) -- has become really, really good. On the flip side, the bad parts of media -- encouraging division and in-fighting, poor treatment of non-administrative professionals, the blind-eye to any profit beyond exponential growth -- have gotten worse.

This isn't a doom-and-gloom statement, though -- these things come in cycles. The Hayes Code Mentality is coming back into full swing, but at least we're past the point of forcing actors to get married in order to promote their films. Some things improve, some things fall back, lather, rinse, repeat. We get being discouraged due to the media landscape -- but remember, all problems are temporary, and bad things will come and go just as often as good things. The good things, the progress, the encouraging changes are no less good simply because they're accompanied by uncertainty.

And if we had to pick a mission statement for answering this ask, I suppose that would be it. There are so many good and encouraging things that have happened -- watch this space, as I (tumblr mod) am going to have Twitter Mod, in all her beneficence, grab me some screenshots from Twitter to show off good/hopeful/encouraging things that have happened recently, since not everyone (including me!) is on Twitter -- that, while we may encounter doubts, disappointments, and uncertainty, it would be as foolish to throw everything out as it would be to assume that we're completely in the clear.

Recency bias, negativity bias, and plain ol' uncertainty have a way of reminding us that there's still doubt and uncertainty surrounding us in this campaign; at times, to borrow a quote, we can feel like we're braving a storm in a skiff made of paper. When a day, a week, two weeks, or more pass without Absolute Confirmation of being picked up, it's easy to lose confidence, to become discouraged, and to believe that nothing we do matters.

And yes, to just simply get sad. And that's okay, that's normal and understandable.

To answer the question posed at the beginning of this ask: yes, we still firmly believe that we're going to get our show back. So many good things -- Nice Things -- have happened and continue to happen (once again, watch this space for a screenshot-heavy post about those things!), that I think it would be wrongheaded to ignore them.

Yes, CF would tell us if there wasn't a chance. It's not really 'free publicity' to encourage people to support a campaign to save a show that they don't have a stake in.

And yes, they make Lockwood and Co; but without a second season, there's no opportunity to make more profit off of it -- sales off DVDs only apply when the show will be put on DVD, after all, which is increasingly uncommon for streaming-premiered shows. Positive word of mouth of "oh they made that really good show that netflix unfairly cancelled" -- a true statement -- only goes so far when negative word of mouth -- "they led fans on when they knew there wasn't a chance" -- is the trade-off.

CF isn't a huge company, they need that positive word of mouth to draw in viewers for current and future projects. On top of all of that, they're human. It's tempting to see every business, no matter the size, as a soul-sucking machine that wrings fans dry for profit, but that simply isn't true, especially of smaller outfits.

The same goes for the Strouds -- there was so much of a rush for the books when the show first came out; people had to wait weeks and weeks for more copies to be printed and sent out through Amazon/Barnes & Noble/other booksellers, and libraries had hold lines for months. That fervor only holds out so long, though, without something concrete -- another season -- to keep it up. In this age of 'receipts', Stroud isn't going to risk his reputation (and provide a lot of clean-up work for his agent) by stringing us alone without any hope.

Everyone involved in this, from the production studio to the author to us, the fans, has a vested interest in not just creating buzz but in actually making a S2 happen. Simply from a business standpoint, it's better business to supply an in-demand product than to not. Attention spans -- and business experts' opinions of attention spans, which is almost more important -- are famously short nowadays. Businesses cannot and do not plan on a small injection to produce long-lasting loyalty and results -- and when they do, like Netflix has been, it bites them in the rear repeatedly.

The sad, sorry fact is that they can't be open and transparent with us about renewal efforts, you're completely right about that. The legalities of contracts and deals within the media industry demand absolute silence until the ink is dry, and sometimes for a bit after that. To use a recent example, the showrunner for Warrior Nun tweeted in March that the show being saved would be because of fan efforts to make it happen. A full 3 months later, he was allowed to announce that the show had officially been picked up. The wheels of media move slowly, but they move.

When does clowning become delusion? The only situation where it would would be if CF came out and told us to stop and that there was no chance. Barring that, it doesn't become delusion. We like to toss around the term 'clowning' -- and it's a fun term that we, the mods, use regularly -- but all we're referring to is the process of distilling what we see into tangible data.

I don't mean to make it sound like some scientific process, but...isn't it? Isn't this all some grand experiment in the name of a grand hobby?

We plot, we plan, we infer, we record, and at the end of the day we turn all of that effort into tangible results. Those results -- trending every single day since cancellation, usually with multiple hashtags/phrases, numerous articles written about the show, its cancellation, and the efforts to save it, a petition with nearly 25k signatures, award nominations, you name it -- are very real, and very helpful.

While ultimately we can't sign the contracts or enact the business deals that will cement our pick-up -- trust us, if we could, they'd be signed by now -- we can provide strong reasons through our engagement for business to want us. The higher we raise demand, the more of a no-brainer providing supply -- a second season -- is.

To all of LockNation, we thank you for your continued efforts. Your tweets, posts, fanart, fanfic, hashtags, signatures, articles, and most importantly, your relentless cheerful dedication, mean the world. We heartily thank you and we heartily encourage you to take breaks, to take care of yourselves. We're confident that, in the future, we will be able to look down at our little skiff made of paper and find that it was made of sterner stuff than we thought.

We're confident in the continued future of Lockwood and Co. We can do this. Look to other successful campaigns; we may have months to go, but we can get through them and come out the victors on the other end.