"Durge came back different", "Durge didn't really come back", "the person who Durge originally was is dead" are all good takes, but what if.
If Durge came back exactly as they were? The brain damage, additional trauma and memory loss are the big altering factors, but underneath that it's still them.
They didn't change drastically, their former self is not dead.
How about one single fragile mortal soul still keeping a hold on itself, how about Durge who was never allowed anything for themselves still retaining them.
How about Durge who has lost everything: power, memories, purpose, sense of self, still being themselves, despite it all.
How about not even Orin's daggers, tadpole and Bhaal combined being able to rob them of their core? How about all of that just revealed who Durge has always been underneath all those expectations Father dearest put on them?
How about: "After all this time, it's still you."
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I'm gonna bake BREAD and I'm gonna make COOKIES and it is going to be a worthwhile *checks calendar* THURSDAY.
but also what's everyone else doing to make it worthwhile today
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do you think the mess in oshiros hotel is meant to signify that hes been letting his problems pile up until its become too overwhelming to handle.
im thinking about the fact that he's definitely the one who's been making the mess but he doesn't even realize it. he ignores the clutter until it becomes too hard to ignore you know? like when it starts actively blocking the way to the presidential suite. he insists that he and his staff will handle it and that madeline shouldn't clean up his own mess, but he still doesn't do anything about it. does he know that the staff is gone? that it's just him there?
mr oshiro is so hell bent on impressing madeline so that she'll stay in his hotel. he's so in denial of everything. he doesn't even realize he's dead, he still thinks his hotel never got shut down. I think his insistence on her staying is bc he really wants to believe that the hotel is open, and a costumer would affirm that belief. it could also maybe be a mixture of loneliness too. (also, him treating her as a costumer even after she says no is absolutely him being in denial. that man is very unhealthily attached to this hotel,)
and even though it was nice of madeline to clean it up, there's still parts of the hotel she can't fix. the plumbing. the windows. the, hole in the ceiling (oops.) she's not qualified to help him, and that's why I think the chapter ends on a bit of a sour note. madeline is of course not a bad person for wanting to help, the point is that she can't. it is unfortunate but true
anyways mr oshiro is a very good character i like him a regular amount. im normal about that old man
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I would love, even if its just its just brief summaries, to know the different thoughts going through bills head throughout the last smut. (mainly when he got the text and when dipper starts just blurting out thoughts and ideas bc i think those moments would be fun to see)
Imagine you're having the shittiest day at work. You're gritting your teeth and hanging onto it by your fingernails, knowing that eventually dealing with this absolutely idiotic, waffling, overstuffed, condescending dipshit of a client will be done with, you'll charge him out the nose for your services - which will probably be, like a hundred dollars, the way this is going! What bullshit. At least afterwards, you can collapse onto the bed and complain to your spouse about it. Which you have been doing, actually, waiting for a decent excuse to bail or check out early.
Then you get a text. And it's your partner saying they got you a brand new console, your favorite pizza - Oh! And a million bucks in untraceable cash - but you might have to kick your shitty client in the nuts so hard his eyes pop out. Does that sound... okay? No pressure or anything.
The reason Bill was a minute later than expected is because even he needed a moment. It was the sheer whiplash from going from Shit to Fucking Amazing.
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All that to say that we are not emotionally close. She let me hug her one time in my childhood, when she came back from summer camp one year. We were not best friends who shared everything. And I'm not going to forget the times I tried to share with her and either got rejected or got undercut somehow, like that her interest was a double edged sword that made me happy at first then hurt me later. She used to pick at me about how I was weird and walked funny and talked funny, and my emotional regulation problems were such a burden to her and ruined things for her. Of course now that weird freak disease is the disease du jour she has to be the weirdest freak of all. And I remember when my parents were having some of their most cataclysmic fights around my mom's alcoholism my sister trying to comfort me once and I wouldn't let her because I didn't trust her. Rant rant rant. Ramble ramble ramble.
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uncle nina, jw, why DOES ravenstan smell like cinnamon and stuff? also i'm not complaining
KHDLKSDSHDSLSD...i've been putting this one off bc...
*cracks knuckles and sighs*
so want to say that ravenstan smells like cinnamon sugar and spiced apple cider and fireball and autumn because of very beautiful metaphorical shit that ties directly into the story and is very touching and emotional and poigonant and gripping...however...
it's just because when he gets too lazy to REGULARLY SHOWER in between shows he just DOUSES HIMSELF IN THE APPLE CINNAMON GLADE SCENTED AIR FRESHNER and calls it a day.
OHHHHh MY GSIHSHDGOOOOD!!!! i'm so embarrassed, i'm so sorry. management was like ravenstan you have a concert did you shower? and he was like UhhUhhUhuhhHhhh *douses himself w/ the SAME apple cinnamon glade room freshener that he also uses to SPRAY HIS ROOM W/ WHEN ITS BIOHAZARD DISGUSTING* all done! <3 :)
HEEEEEELLLPPP!!!!!! and everyone is like wow you smell So Good and he's like thank you it's my cologne...its very expensive and foreign its called...um...~Gladé~ ( pls note ravenstan trying to speak french when he's used to spanish is rly funny, kyle makes fun of him 25/8 )
everyone on twitter is like wow i just met raven of crimson dawn and he smells like a beautiful chai tea latte, the most sinfully delicious glass of horchata i've ever had, a beautiful warm apple fritter, one of those big candied apples you get at the fair, or a caramel one, like a shot of fireball, a wood burning stove, freshly baked cinnamon rolls,
aND ITS JUST THE FUCKING APPLE CINNAMON GLADE AIR FRESHNER AND ITS PROBABLY BECAUSE HE GOT TOO LAZY TO FIND A STICK OF DEODERANT!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE U RAVEN
*sonrisa/sharon w/ the chancla vc* cOCHINO!!!
this does ruin kyle's life btw, like imagine you think you like a guy who smells really really good and you think he smells extra good and like all the things you like because you Like him...when in reality he smells that good to you because beneath the enchanting mouthwatering aroma of beautiful cinnamon apple goodness...is the stupid fucking idiot boy spraying himself with a $1.47 autumnal room spray...and it's his dirty nasty, dumbass bisexual disaster boy pheromones ur actually attracted to & not the cool, mysterious rockstar ones...smh.
i do think he thinks it smells nice tho <3 and it does!!!! never change baby! i mean!! maybe your clothes!!! how many days has it been now?
-uncle nina, beautiful but disgusting boy fail mother
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anyways Annie represents everything unknown beyond the ocean, and thus her act of mercy toward Armin represents the ocean/unknown/humanity acting with mercy toward Armin and that’s why he goes to her, seashell in hand, to comprehend aloud why his dreams of the great blue yonder have not only fallen apart but turned against him. and I’ll take a large fries with ketchup
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