#and I've been getting migranes again

[bunn-iiii]

"Why have I been so exhausted and overwhelmed by everything recently???" boy you are fighting off multiple infections and literally the fatigue, pain, and brain difficulty working disorder

[honeyroha]

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[scientia-rex]

Hello, I appreciate your medical posts very much and having seen a post the other day where you said migraine was in your areas of special interest, I'd love to ask a related question. You talk about bodies and medicine and patient experience etc in a way that makes a lot of sense to me and I'd trust your take.

I have chronic migraine. I'm currently at 100% pain days, with varying severity. Very hard to pin down what is prodrome, the main event, and postdrome as it's all blurred into one. My migraine team want me to reduce painkiller usage (currently dihydrocodeine and paracetamol daily, and ibuprofen maybe every other day on top) due to rebound headache. I want to cut down because they're fucking expensive and I'm scared for my liver and kidneys. But I literally can't cope with life without them. I went off them for four months a few years ago and the pain was so severe and so debilitating I was the most suicidal I've been in my life. Without painkillers I can't get to the toilet unaided, rarely leave bed, even more rare to leave the house. It's hell. And that's not even considering the effects on everyone around me who has to pick up to care for me.

So what do I do? The way I see things, I need something to help the pain improve before I can use less painkillers, but the longer I go on trying to find something that works and not getting there, the more I think maybe I'm wrong in that. I know a bit about how codeine based painkillers can reduce your pain tolerance / pain baseline. I don't think it's an addiction issue because I've been at the same (over the counter) dosages for 4 years now. I just want to do all that I can to be better, but I also need to be alive to be better. I am stuck.

TL;DR - If you have any thoughts on the relationship between chronic migraine, painkiller use, preserving quality of life while finding a treatment, and increasing the chances of a treatment working, and where on earth the balance between all that lies, I'd really like to hear them.

Again, I absolutely appreciate if you can't answer this, don't want to etc. Giving advice online is notoriously tricky and all that. But a big thank you for your time in reading, and all your weight and exercise posts especially which make me feel so much better about my body. Wishing you all good things! 💖

I won't speak to your case directly, since I'm not your doctor, but here is my personal algorithm for escalating treatments for migraine (note that "abortives" in this case means something you take after a migraine starts to try to end it, while "prophylactic" means a daily treatment you take to reduce likelihood of developing a migraine):

-OTC combination of magnesium, feverfew, and butterbur, taken daily

-Triptans (insurance will usually demand patients fail at least 3 to cover a more expensive treatment)

-High-dose NSAIDs (as abortive treatment given risk of rebound headaches if used daily)

-Daily topiramate (insurance will always demand this is either failed or there's a clear contraindication)

-Daily calcium channel blockers

-Daily beta blockers (higher dose than used for anxiety or low-grade arrhythmias)

-Daily anti-epileptic medications (such as Lamictal)

-Monthly anti-CGRP monoclonal antibody injections (Aimovig or Ajovy; expensive so insurance will demand you've failed some or all of the previous meds)

-Abortive anti-CGRP orals (Nurtec or Ubrelvy)

-Abortive ergotamine, usually Migranal, a nasal spray (very expensive and must be repeated 15 minutes after initial dose regardless of whether symptoms are improving or not)

-Prophylactic Botox (I believe this is every 3 months, must be done in the office of a trained and licensed professional, usually but not always a Neurology provider)

-Sphenopalatine ganglion blocks (done by dripping lidocaine far back into the sinuses to reach the sphenopalatine ganglion, again in the office of a trained and licensed professional)

-Cephaly (transcranial magnetic stimulation at-home device), expensive so insurance hates covering it

Now, one of my newer tools, and my current personal favorite, is a greater occipital nerve block--easy and fast, low risk, and I've had about 90% success with my patients in aborting current headaches. Effects seem to last 3-4 weeks in most cases and since it's straight lidocaine (you don't have to include steroids, though you can) you can do it as often as needed. I generally do this in my office, but I did train one patient's spouse to do it at home given how frequent their headaches. The pharmacy lost their fucking mind about letting an outpatient have lidocaine. I don't know why.

I currently manage my pretty awful chronic migraines with a combination of monthly Aimovig, as-needed Excedrin (the combination of caffeine, Tylenol aka paracetamol, and aspirin is effective for many people but is a real risk for causing medication overuse headaches, the more official term for bounce-back), as-needed Ubrelvy (I can sleep after taking Ubrelvy but not Excedrin so it's a good option), and roughly monthly greater occipital nerve blocks (I teach my trainees to do it using myself as a subject). I wouldn't mind trying the Botox but it's a PITA to get in to see our only local Neurology provider and since my migraines are relatively well-controlled (probably 1-2 headache days a week right now) I don't think it's worth the effort.

I also really got a lot out of this lecture, so give it a try.

[baratiddyappreciator]

Christmas with the Baki Cast (NSFW)

The promised NSFW short stories! Minors DNI (obviously). I was originally going to write these on my flight home and just do a mega post with the other Christmas post, but uh, that didn't happen (there was crying children and I had a migrane). Might have been a teensy delay on these coming out. Just a tiny one. An itty-bitty one. Totally didn't consume my entire attention-span and made me unable to answer any asks while it was cooking up. Definitely not. ANYWAYS! Continued under the cut.

Baki: He'd been practically begging for weeks now to open one of his Christmas presents. Just one! Even if it was just a little one, he'd be happy! But you'd seen the fudged wrapping on some of the dummy boxes, you knew that he'd already been trying to peek at the ones that you'd set out, hell, even one of the other decoys you'd hidden near his actual gifts. He'd bugged and bugged and bugged, and you'd finally decided on a way to make him shut up about it. It had taken some clever placements of ribbons and stick on bows, and it wasn't the most comfortable thing to be covered in, but it was well worth it to see the look on his face as you walked into his room and leaned on the doorframe, making a "well?" motion with your hand, and he wasted no time in opening the gift he'd been so desperately begging to have. His fingers deftly undid the ribbons and plucked off the bows, his lips pressing against your skin time and time again as he unwrapped you.

He wasted no time as he eagerly pressed into you, enjoying his gift from you, and it was a good one at that, his hips eager as they humped against yours, sinking into you as he whispered thanks against your skin like a hushed prayer for your ears only, pleasure sparked with each stroke, though he didn't bother to hide that he was enjoying this too, moans escaping his lips, his forehead damp with sweat and his hair clinging to the base of his neck as he fucked you, not slowly by any means, but much slower than he usually did. He was going to savour you, he was making that clear, especially as you got closer to your own release, a breathless laugh escaping him as he kissed the tip of your nose. "Come on baby, you enjoy your present too."

Kozue: The weather outside was dreadful, cold and overall unpleasant. Some part of you felt bad for her mother, who still hadn't come back from getting the groceries, stuck out in this mini blizzard that had struck seemingly out of nowhere. But you weren't outside right now. No, right now you and Kozue were sitting beneath her nice, warm and fluffy blankets, some old classic Christmas movie playing on her laptop, but neither of you were watching that right now. No, instead you were watching her flushed face in the mirror as she tried to nuzzle it further into your neck. Perched on your lap, her pajama pants around her ankles as your fingers plunged deep into her time and time again, her clit bumping against your palm as she ground against your hand, desperate for more, her nails biting into your thighs.

Her slick was going to leave a mess all over her sheets, but it was obvious that she didn't care about that at this point, just desperate to get off. Her breath was hot against your throat as her forehead pressed harder into the side of your neck, trying to leverage herself so she could trap your hand between her and your thigh, but unable to push herself up long enough to do so, her legs were too shaky. Your other hand was lost under her sweater, rolling one of her nipples between your index and thumb. This close, you could feel her shivering, her walls shivering around your fingers as they pumped in and out of her, before she rolled her hips abruptly to the side, doing exactly what she'd sought out to do: pinning your hand. Her hips ground against your thigh, your fingers picking up speed inside of her as she rode your palm, her clit pressed into the meat of your thumb over and over, a whine leaving her lips. "Please, I've been good, I promise!"

Hanayama: He'd been picking things up and putting them back down all day. The decorations for the house were all the same as the ones his mother had used when he was younger, and if they weren't then they were very similar, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn't quite get the look or the feel right. The frustration had been eating at him all day. Maybe that was why he'd come to you. He'd been picking things up and putting them back down all day, but this time, he didn't mind it as much. There was no frustration left in his body as he picked your hips up, sliding you all the way up his cock, the fat head the only thing left inside of you, before he pushed you all the way back down, your arms wrapped around his neck loosely. No tension, just picking you up, and putting you back down. Up and down, a repetitive motion he could do with his eyes closed, and he did, his head leaning back, eyes slipping closed as he let out a low groan.

You were so warm, soft and welcoming. He didn't need to decorate you, he didn't need to worry about perfection with you, because you were already perfect. A puff of air escaped him as your hips rolled against his on a downward stroke, his hands trembling as they dug into the soft flesh of your thighs. This close, he could smell the bodywash you used, the soft scent of sugar cookies clinging to your hair from when you'd done some baking earlier. He grunted, his hips bucking up to meet yours as his arms wrapped around your waist, pinning you to his chest tightly as he braced his feet on the floor so he could properly pound into you, fucking you dumb against his chest as the Christmas lights he'd hung up outside finally flicked on for the night. "Just what I needed after a long day baby."

Chiharu: This had been the last straw. He'd torn through the gifts you'd hidden away while you stepped out for ten minutes to go get some more peppermint candy for him, and you were going to make sure that he knew he was on your naughty list. Fluffy red handcuffs held him steadfast against the frame of the bed, your hand slowly stroking up and down his shaft, straining against his stomach, throbbing in time with his racing heart, and he'd taken up almost constantly whining because the capability of forming words was something he'd lost after his third orgasm of the day. Your touch was still feather-light, your fingertips ghosting over his skin, barely giving him anything to get off with, but he was still trying, arching up into your touch desperately.

You'd told him to appologize more than once, but he'd only taken up pleading with you for a release, straining against the cuffs, his precious pompadour all messed up, his blonde hair left messy and clinging to his sweat-soaked forehead, the blindfold keeping him from seeing the amused smile on your lips as he struggled to fuck your hand, his own cum splashed on his stomach. You really hoped that he hadn't found the presents you'd stashed under the bed, because if he had you'd be out of luck for the rest of Christmas. But that was alright, if he'd been naughty, you could just keep disciplining him, drool sliding down his cheek as he groaned, spilling over your fingers once again, entire body tensing up. "I promise I won't be naughty again dollface, promise!"

Katsumi: He'd been having such a good time at the dojo's Christmas party, completely unaware of you staring holes into his back as he played with the kids and laughed with his friends and fellow students. He'd remained ignorant of your intense stares until you both got home and you practically tackled him against the kitchen counter and ripped him out of that corny ass Christmas sweater that he'd insisted on wearing so you could slather his chest in kisses and bites, watching as his skin flushed bright red as your hand stroked him to hardness as you lathed his chest in attention. He whined and made all sorts of little noises, but you didn't let up. Writhing and fucking your hand, he was all yours now, and until he had to go back into work, he would continue to be all yours. Nobody else could touch him or look at him being so stupidly charming, just you. He tried offering you his thigh to grind on, but you weren't doing this to get off, you were doing this to mark your territory and show him that he was yours.

Biting his neck, you left bold hickies that the women that had eyed him up would see clear as day on the follow up party tomorrow night. Maybe you could convince him not to wear that stupid sweater again, though you had your doubts, his hands shaking as he gripped the edges of the counter, gasping against your lips, his hair messy from where your fingers had dragged through it, the dark strands falling into his eyes, tickling your brow, his hips bucking shallowly into your hand, your grip on his shaft firm and possessive. He may be a dumb karate jock, but he was your dumb karate jock, and you were going to show him just how much you'd appreciated his showing off all night, his shaft throbbing against your palm as he grew nearer and nearer to his orgasm. "Baby, please, it's just a holiday party!"

Jack: You really hadn't known what to expect when you'd dragged Jack out to go skating, but him tearing up the ice in a stunning display of grace definitely wasn't it. He clearly hadn't realised exactly how much of an effect he'd had on you, not until you'd both gotten home and you'd jumped him in the shower, the hot water beading down your skin, the roaring heat of his chest pressed against your back as the slightly cooler shower tiles pressed to your front, his hips pushing against yours slow but hard, his shaft pressing deep inside of you before being dragged backwards just as slowly as it had pressed inwards, kissing every inch of your insides as he fucked you against the shower wall so lovingly that it almost didn't fit with the filth that he whispered in your ear, his hand settled firmly on the back of your neck.

All traces of the cold you'd just come in from now gone, leaving only a memory in the tips of your fingers and toes as he indulged you, letting you clearly feel the strength in his thighs as he pounded into you, forcing your body to go limp against the shower wall. His lips pressed against your damp forehead, water dripping down his broad shoulders. The steam made the air cloyingly thick, not helping the feeling of choking every time he hit deep, your legs dangling almost entirely uselessly beneath you with each rut, the fingers on his other hand gently caressing you, leaving you with nowhere to escape. Forward or backwards, you'd meet him, and he was determined to have you cumming on his cock before the hot water ran out. "You still cold darlin'? Don't worry, I'll make sure that you're nice and warm by the time I'm done."

Kosho: Hot chocolate had been his idea. Just go get some hot chocolate, go for a walk, and then go home, that's all he'd said he wanted to do, but now you were both crowded together in a small closet, his hand down your pants, between your thighs, stroking you firmly as his face buried itself into the crook of your neck. You'd both snuck away a while ago, and were hoping that nobody would think to look in the supply closet for anything, but right now, your concerns were turning more towards if you'd be able to cum before then or not. His hips ground against yours slowly, seeking out his own friction. The room was cold when you'd first walked in, but now it was almost swelteringly hot. His fingers were rough, seeking out a rhythm that made you bite back moans, because each time he found it you'd shimmy away to avoid making too much noise.

But now he'd maneuvered you into a position where you had no escape, your hips pulled back into his, your shoulders pressed against the wall, there was nowhere you could run because your options would be to either grind back into his crotch, or grind forward into his hand. His strokes grew faster, his teeth scraping against the shell of your ear, his hips grinding against yours shamelessly. He was going to make sure that you both came sooner rather than later, and if it meant you getting caught, then so be it. This was a boring place anyways and he didn't mind getting asked to leave, especially if it meant he could tease you openly at home, where he knew you'd be more open to making noises. A strangled noise escaped your lips, a cross between a moan and a whine, and his grin grew sharper as he leaned in, lips brushing the shell of your ear. "What's the matter? Don't you like your present? And after I worked so hard on it too..."

Kureha: He'd told you he'd be coming home from work late, a quick text towards lunchtime. It wasn't unusual for him to stay late at the hospital, he was a hard worker after all, but you'd figured you'd do something nice for him that would be non-messy so he (you) wouldn't have to clean it up later. What you hadn't expected was for him to step into the living room at the same time as you, both of you decked out in Christmas-themed lingerie. Well, if that's what what he was wearing could even be called. A long, singular ribbon wound around his body, tied in a bow around his shaft just enough to be snug. He stared at you, blinked, and then scoffed, smirking. Oh you could hear the teasing remarks now, clear as day, and of course, he did tease, though he didn't bother to do so for long.

The couch was rocking beneath the both of you, silly little getups long forgotten as he pounded into you from behind, his long red hair tickling your skin as he pounded into you from behind, his hand sealed around your throat, leaving your vision splotchy as he brought you to tears on his cock, a smug smirk on his face a he bullied your poor insides with each forward stroke, perfectly aimed at your spot, because of course it was. First he ruins your (impromptu) surprise, then he took charge from you when you'd set out a plan to help him relax (you'd made it up on the spot when you heard he'd be home late), and now he was making you cum first when you'd wanted it to be him? Whatever noises you'd made in protest, he'd interpreted correctly, because he leaned over you further, forcing you head back so you'd look at him properly as his hips pressed flush against yours. "What? Going to throw a fit because you didn't get the present you wanted? Awful naughty of you."

Retsu: You could almost feel bad about disturbing Retsu's holiday baking. Almost. The view before you was more than enough to make up for the delay in eating the sweets he was hell-bent on preparing as he whined, face a bright red as your hips slammed against his, his legs thrown over your shoulders. It wasn't very often that he wound up bottoming for you, but it was well worth it every time he did. His entire face would turn red, all the way down to his chest would practically light up like a Christmas tree- which you had a perfect view of from here- and it was highly entertaining to watch, though he'd outright deny that he blushed that much whenever he got flustered. Still, you knew the truth, pleasure singing up and down your spine as you drove into him again and again, strangled whines escaping his lips, his head thrown to the side, hair spread around behind him.

His cock jumped against his stomach, his thighs flexing around your sides, trying to draw you in closer, to get more, but you dictated the pace, you dictated all of it, and he wouldn't be able to wriggle his way into getting more when you weren't ready to give it to him. Another thrust against his hips earned a whine, his head turning to the other side, his throat bared for you. Your hand would fit so perfectly around it that the temptation to grab and start choking him was strong, but knowing him, he'd wind up throwing you and hurting himself in the process. If he noticed you chuckling, then he certainly didn't say anything about it as his nails scrabbled at the blanket beneath him, your name leaving his lips in a soft plea for more. "Please! More! I've been so good already!"

Doppo & Natsue: One in front, one behind, hands roamed across your body, loving touches being left all over. Natsue's soft lips pressed against your cheek as Doppo's fingers sank into you, slowly massaging you open. The holidays were a stressful time for everyone, and you hadn't been an exception, but they were going to do their best to show their appreciation for all your hard work. Soft whispers against your skin reassured you as they slowly eased you towards a climax, though you weren't quite there yet, the pleasure you were being given was gentle and slow, fingers pumping in and out of your body, a tongue lapping at your nipples, lips pressing against your shoulder and your neck, soothing words being whispered against your skin in the low light.

Hips rolled along with yours, urged on by Doppos to have you grinding against Natsue. His two lovers deserved only the best after all, and he would ensure that they'd both cum before he did, and Natsue was hell-bent on making sure that you'd go before she did, holding your face in her hands as the two of you rocked together, watching every minute expression on your face and glancing to Doppo to let him know what you needed to tip over the edge, both of them listening attentively to your moans as you grew closer and closer to your climax at their hands. "Enjoying your gift sweetheart?" "You deserve it after how good you've been."

Motobe: Ribbons and rope dug into your skin, a feeling of weightlessness surrounding you. Though you couldn't see that through the ribbon tied around your eyes, you knew exactly where he was. He wasn't touching you yet, simply letting you hang there in the air, shivering needily like some pathetic little creature, desperate for anything that he would give you. The room was quiet, the only thing you could pick up was the smell of cigarette smoke, and occasionally the soft flow of wind as he presumably moved around you. You could plead as much as you wanted, but he wasn't going to answer you, nor was he going to indulge you. No, as a matter of fact, he was perfectly happy to leave you hanging like this, still trembling from your last orgasm, his cum seeping out of you and dripping on the floor, begging him for more as he admired his handywork, the mess that he made of you was something he wanted to print out on a canvas and hang on his wall.

His hand rested on your thigh, earning a full-bodied flinch, though you could practically feel the smirk as you relaxed against his touch, his hand following your thigh up the curve of your ass, resting softly on your cheek for just a moment before he lifted it and brought it down in a sharp slap, sending a jolt through your body, but the smack was the only contact he gave you, and then he was gone again, leaving you blind again, whining in anticipation for the next strike, unable to get any friction, thus, no relief for the ache between your legs. His fingers tilted your chin up to kiss you on the tip of your nose, a chuckle rumbling up from his chest. "What's the matter? I thought you wanted to be on the nice list."

Shibukawa: It was cold, dark and snowy out, and you'd just gotten home from a really long day of work. You just wanted to lay down, curl up near the fireplace and watch some TV or read a book with Shibukawa. And while, yeah, you were now currently laying on the floor in front of the fireplace with Shibukawa, it hadn't been in the "relaxing" way that you'd hoped it would be. No, instead of being a normal sane human being, he'd decided to "prank'' you by tearing all the wrapping off of his gifts, cleverly obscuring any branding or hints as to what was inside, at the very least, but now there was a mess, and you were just so tired. Flopping down onto the floor and giving him no reaction had left the older man concerned, and honestly a bit guilty. He'd said he'd make it up for you, and so far, he was. It had started out as a massage, but now? Now his hand was between your legs, working you over with a casual air about him.

Each stroke was almost blinding, his hands working you rough and fast, fast enough to make your head spin and the worries and stresses of the day pool out of your ears, but not fast enough to be overstimulating. No, as a matter of fact, it was perfect. Warm, with your lover working you over, forgetting about the stresses of today as he kissed your forehead, fingers damp from your slick as he stroked you harder, forcing your brain to forget about that annoying lady at checkout, or that absolute moron on the road, or even the mess of wrapping paper just out of your view. He would make it better, you didn't have to worry your pretty little head about a thing, not tonight at least. "There you are, don't you worry, the holidays this years are going to be perfect."

[artistsfuneral]

part 6 of this

"Meaning you don't listen to me, no matter how often we live through this," Jaskier retords, sounding a bit more agitated than he wants to. Sue him, it's the truth after all.

Geralt snorts, "Can't imagine why."

"Excuse me?"

"Listen, bard, I've known you for less than an hour and I am already developing a migrane. The idea of you, constantly following me everywhere, breathing down my neck, telling me every five minutes what I can and cannot do just because there might be the possibility of me dying-" Geralt grimaces and Jaskier can't help but feel a bit attacked. Yes, sure, that might have been how he acted the first few times, but he's gotten better at it since!

"Besides, this whole ordeal seems very... unprepared. Not really thought through to be honest."

"What on earth are you talking about?"

The witcher sighs and breaks eye contact with Jaskier. "I know I should appreciate the whole trying to save my life thing, but first of all, I'm a witcher, every day could be my last day. Secondly, what if you somehow manage to prevent every possible death? Are you going to dedicate your entire life to me? Ignore your own goals and wellbeing?" Not like he already did that multiple times, Jaskier scoffs quietly. "What comes after we've reached that point? How can you be so sure it's a good thing if I survive? And thirdly, given what little you explained to me, I take it that I will live for at least some time before I die? Five years? Ten, twenty? Long enough to get to know you, befriend you, unfriend you, befriend you again and have a child? Doesn't seem all that bad to me."

remember to like and reblog if you voted because I feel like a youtuber everytime I type this

[slasher-male-wife]

Hi, hello!

It's been a while, hasn't it. How are you doing comrade? Personally, I'm doing quite well. I'm going to see Halloween Ends sometime after it releases. I've also gotten a 5 ft tall skeleton I can dance around with in my room.

Back to why I'm here, I was wondering if you could write something about a slasher getting mad at y/n and y/n ignoring said slasher for the next few days, but in the end they end up going to the slasher and start cuddling them or something lovey dovey.

(Preferably Nubbins Sawyer, Choptop Sawyer, Thomas Hewitt + Anyone else if you wanna add em)

Xoxo

-13

Hi anon I’m so sorry this took a bit to get to. Anyway I’ll happily write this for you. I just wrote something like this but for different characters. I had a bit of trouble coming up with what they would be arguing about but I figured it out. I’m in a bit of a Bill Mosely kick because of House of 1000 corpses so this is a great request to have rn.

Slashers and reader making up after a fight

Includes: Nubbins Sawyer, Chop Too Sawyer, Thomas Hewitt

Warnings: Strong language, implied murder, mention of roadkill

Nubbins Sawyer

Nubbins always liked to play jokes on you. They're mostly harmless, something along the lines of just jump scaring you and then it's over. But a few days ago he went a bit too far. While you were outside he staged what looked like his organs coming out of his stomach. You screamed when you saw it and quickly rushed over to his side. After a few moments of pure panic he started to laugh. He pushed off the roadkill guts he got and just laughed. You quickly stood up and shouted at him. Why would he scare you like that? You cussed him out before going back inside.

You avoided him for the next few days. You just couldn't stand to see him. But you couldn't stay mad for long. He didn't mean to scare you that bad did he? He just wanted to spook you right? Nobody actually got hurt. So when you saw him sitting on the couch looking over pictures he took you sat down next to him. This being the first time you've been near him in the past few days he quickly discarded the pictures and wrapped you in his arms.

"Y/N I know you was gonna come back! I knew you was gonna forgive me!" He shouts pulling you into his lap and giving you kisses all along your temple and cheek.

"Ok ok calm down honey!" You say with a smile, "I missed you too. You just scared me really bad. Don't do that again please."

"Oh I promise I won't! I'll be real nice I swear!" He starts to break into quiet laughter and you couldn't help but laugh along too.

Chop Top Sawyer

Today you woke up with a pounding headache and nothing you could do could stop it. You just decided to wait it out in your room with the lights off. You're trying to just relax when you can hear, clear as day, Chop Top playing the radio as loud as ever. You knocked on the walls a few times and told him to quiet down. However he just kept playing his music super loud.

You had enough and got up and walked over to where he was. You turned off the radio and crossed your arms.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph. Don't you have the decency to at least turn down the radio so I can fucking try and heal this headache?" You shout at him.

"Why the hell'd you turn the music off?" He shouts back at you. You scoff.

"Were you not fucking listening you idiot? I have a fucking migrane and I need quiet so turn the god damn music down!" You shout making your head throb even more.

"Well this is my damn house! I can listen to my music as loud as I want to!" His yelling also makes it worse.

"Well I live here too you know? Maybe think of other people some time!" The two of you went back and forth between this before you stormed off. It's been a few days since and the headache has long passed. You can't help but feel bad for being so mean to your boyfriend.

You pick up a boombox and a cassette and make your way over to Chop Top's room. You knock before entering. He's sitting at a desk where he's making something. You set the box down and put in the tape. Soon the music starts to play and you walk over to him. You lower yourself down to his sitting level and kiss his cheek.

"Whatcha making lovely?" You ask. You're quickly pulled into a tight, bone crushing hug by Chop top and you both start to laugh.

"You're not mad anymore?" He asks

"Of course not honey. I couldn't stay mad forever," You two share a sweet kiss and he pulls away. You get a better peak at what he's making this time, "How about you tell me all about this." You say gesturing to the project.

"I gladly will."

Thomas Hewitt

You'd grown bored waiting upstairs in your room while the family dealt with some new victims. The screaming and yelling has stopped at least an hour ago. You decided to go downstairs just for a little bit before you go crazy. You leave your room and head for the kitchen to grab something to drink. You passed Monty in the living room with a nod and you can see Luda Mae in the back yard hanging up laundry.

You open the fridge and bend down to grab a soda. When you shut the door someone grabs your wrist. You expected it to be Hoyt but it was Tommy. You could see that he was clearly worried. You jumped and took a deep breath.

"Christ Thomas you scared the shit out of me," He points to you and to the floor, "What am I doing down here?" you ask. He nods, "I'm just getting a drink Thomas," He shakes his head and you pull your wrist out of his hand, "I know there are victims here ok? I just got thirsty. I was going mad up in that room too."

He huffs and you put a hand on your hip, "I'm not a child Tommy. I know what you and your family do here alright. Now I'm gonna go back upstairs. I hope that's ok with you." You pop open your soda and you walk out of the kitchen. You spent the rest of the day up in your room. You didn't talk to Thomas when he came up to see you. You were silent during dinner too.

But when it finally came time for bed you saw Thomas already in bed. You laid down next to him and cuddled into him, "I love you." You say. Thomas holds you close to him as a reply.

[maryonmega]

Twin Stars - Chapter 4

As you remenber (but really not?)

If the party had plans to split to look for itens, they were shattered the moment you joined. It's overwhelming, but you'll be blinded if you complain. 

 

At the same time you're grateful the whole "woe is us, wish craft amnesia!" thing allows you to get away with generic or vague responses and internally panicking over being very much aware of how little to nothing you know about being a sibling, let alone a similar-aged one. You hope that those things can be brushed off by, well, everything. Stars, you were a mess long before looping trauma. At least on that, you and Stardust can agree.

 

"I don't really have a place to settle, I've been on the road for a good time." Truth.

 

"I was out of Vaugard for some, so I didn't find out about the King business untill a couple weeks ago." Truth.

 

"It feels so surreal I'm kind of mad, not gonna lie. Feel sidetracked." Half truth.

 

"Stardust is because he came after me." Half truth. If you patted a bug off one of shoulders that's another thing. 

 

Good thing the Kid is as loose lips as their age can excuse. They're so clearly impatiente to get home. 

 

You think about an angry voice yelling about their home being frozen. You were stupid and ripped it away from them. This Kid forgave the Traveler, but would yours forgive you?

 

You had to go back to the place you had left the rest of your attire, thankful for the warmt your cloak gave you and that you still don't have a lot on you (careful with the alcohol bottles, they're unlikely to break but not impossible). Maybe a matching set serves as extra evidence? You're siblings, yes, even have the same "made with love" type of clothing. 

 

You don't feel... "things" thinking about this as much as you likely would before, but it's still there. How twisted is that? Grief pilled on top of grief?

 

You pull your hat down over your face untill the shopping is done and the group heads for an inn. At least you can do that again. 

 

In some odd luck strike, your the group managed to get rooms on the same floor. As you and the Researcher make yourselves comfortable, you could hear the Traveler and the Fighter if you payed attention, tho not what they say. Maybe it's better this way. 

 

You need to be careful. She might have accepted you, but that doesn't mean she trusts you. Stars, she might have offered to be your roommate because she doesn't trust you. 

 

"So, a third person from the country that got erased."

 

"Ah, third?" Well you be blinded, she's not sparing you here, is she? Good thing you're not biting your tongue in such a cliche way.

 

"Yes. It's a curious thing, considering how long ago it seens to have been."

 

She's trying to bait you. 

 

Don't let her.

 

"The other person didn't look like us, did them? I can't imagine the migrane if we turn out to be triplets."

 

The Reasercher shakes her head. It could be impression or wishful hopeful thinking, but you think she face could have softened.

 

Real or not, so did yours. You already knew she wasn't exacly like your Researcher, but this kind of reminder is just as painful. Better to take solace in her denial, now that would be messy.

 

"This is not about how your family tree branches, it's about a noted pattern. Sisyphus, do you percieve memory problems?"

 

Talk about not beating about the bush, eh? You should ask Stardust how the communication is going, when you get another alone time. Right now, tho, you have a bomb to difuse near your face.

 

You smile and clasp your hands.

 

"My, oh my, missy. Is that the impression you have of us? That we have terrible memory? I mean, I do have bad memory and used the royal we, but that's aside."

 

She showed with just her eyes that she listened, face hard to read. This still sens to be same. Fuck.

 

"Don't take it personally, Sisyphus. It wasn't intended as an insult to you or your ethnicity."

 

Right now, will extra details come across as a cover up? But silence wouldn't help with tension at all, it doesn't help that you can't foresee if she's going to slip into coldness or allow a bit of warmt out. 

 

No, silly, she won't be warm. Even if you have a human face again, to her, you're still a stranger.

 

You grab your pants under your cloak.

 

"Miss, please, I'm trying to wiggle back into a family I don't even know if I can still call mine. Can I have more than a few hours to breath?"

 

Truth. Maybe that's why she decided to surrender.

 

"Of course. But don't try to run, young one. This involves me now."

 

"I know."

 

Truth.

 

The bottle calls you like a siren song. You take it and offer to the Researcher, who looks at it but rejects, before taking a swing.

 

You think about sharing a wine bottle, but that tought gets fuzzy with the burning sensation running down your throat. Maybe the "no" was for the best. 

 

You only take off your cloak to prepare for bed, the heat in your gut more than welcome when it left your skin. 

 

Even under the fog, before your eyes drift close, you can't help but wonder if she waited so you wouldn't be cornered. 

 

The thought lingers as you allow nothingness to embrance you. 

 

~★~

 

Loop is sharing a room with Odile. In party it was because you couldn't muster up the courage to insist, but there was the part that chose not to for selfish reasons. You know madame wouldn't offer just like that for no reason and don't think you could face her glare if you did, sure, but wanting to share with Isa was another. Your only defense is that you've had a boyfriend for longer than a sibling, even if the extra time was less than a week. 

 

First hand experience is something new and your plays seen to have been packed with a good amount of lies, don't be too hard on yourself. 

 

Stars, you think about how Loop would know things inside the House and wonder how much they could know now, even if their body changed. 

 

Do they know about the daily breadowns in the time you were in bedrest?

 

You don't think so, but you didn't think they would help save you, either. 

 

"Sif? Siffrin?"

 

Isa's voice snaps you out of your thoughts. Even if it hasn't been that long, it's not hard to tell the new "we need to talk" tone. Sometimes you can't help but wonder if it's porpuseful. You turn away from your bag and towards him. 

 

"Yes?"

 

Isa has his arms over his chest, expression serious but not dark. Good sign?

 

"I was thinking, the sibling is yours, the trauma, too, we can't dictate how you deal with associating both."

 

You feel goosebumps in your arms. You didn't think about that. 

 

"But, that involves us, too, specially now. I really think it's important... No, it is really important for us to know how much you want Sisyphus to know. Or not know. I don't want to backslide your talking progress" even tho it's tiny and partly coughed out under mental duress "but I don't want to trample a boundary either. We can figure things out, I'm sure! But that depends on what you want."

 

You're already half panicked just with Loop being Odile's roommate. The thought of pretending like they know nothing is terrifying to the point you think you'll faint here and now if you say you don't want to tell. 

 

Well, you be blinded, you'll have to act like you're giving a newcomer special treatment. 

 

"I'll tell them about the loops. When we have an alone time."

 

"You will?"

 

"Yes. Ah, don't get it wrong! It's not because I trusted you less! I just don't want to stun even more, specially when it's already so hard."

 

"Sif." His gaze siftned "It's fine. I'm glad you will."

 

"I really think I should tell one on one, though."

 

"And I can leave the room so you can have privacy when you talk."

 

What did you do to deserve this man?

 

You don't see Loop when you leave the room for dinner. "Out like a light", is how Odile described. You can sympathize. You were tired, you can't imagine how they were. 

 

Besides, the little time it buys is welcome. 

(Mother of inner monologues? Actual stuff will happen soon enough, I swear!

Loop: I don't want to ruin my new skin *proceeds to attack their liver*)

[cpunkwitch]

Hey, it's the anon that asked if chronic pain counted as a physical disability

I guess I just wanted to ask a few other things because you're like the first person who has actually answered my questions on this kind of stuff— I'm sorry if it becomes annoying or if my questions are stupid, I really struggle with research and stuff, so if this stuff is easily found on google or something then im sorry

I wanted to mainly ask what counts as debilitating? I mean my chronic pain tends to come in episodes that last a few minutes to a few hours (well the most noticeable of it, which is my ribs. But I do tend to havesort of aches in my joints, knees((are they joints?)), hip and some other places pretty commonly, and that usually lasts a few hours but I'm usually good at ignoring that), sometimes it can happen every day for a week and sometimes I can go weeks without experiencing or noticing any pain. I can still do things that most people do I think? Other than running or walking up hills, that usually takes away all my breath and makes the pain really bad (so bad I've had to lay on the floor for up to 10-20 minutes because I walked up too many hills). I don't know if that would count as debilitating

For further context, I am quite young and I don't have any diagnosis, I haven't seen a doctor over it because my parents don't believe my pain is real and often say it's growing pains (I don't think it is, since it started back when I was like 7-9, so before I started growing) so I don't really know much about this or my body really

Again sorry if this is a sort of stupid question, if you can't answer it or don't feel comfortable answering it that's perfectly fine ^_^ /gen

holding you gently (if touch is okay)

i dont think you understand anon im autistic all i do is research please please ask me to your hearts content! /silly

going bit by bit so its easier on my dyslexia, what counts as debilitating? subjective to the person but overall; debilitating means a condition or otherwise symptom of some kind causng a person to be weak, effects their usual functions or otherwise hindering, so for something to be disabling / debilitating and to count as such, it just means it hinders you in some way and generally makes you weaker in a "more suseptible to" way, such as chronic pain making it so you cant get out of bed i the morning, you cant lift heavy things like chairs etc.

it common for chronic pain and other chronic conditions to come in episodes my moms chronic migranes for example only happen about once a month. it still counts as chronic so long as its reoccuring and when it does occur if it hinders you in any way then it very much counts as debilitating and therefore a disablity.

the pain level doesnt have to be consistent nor does the time length, just that its reoccuring in some way.

knees are joints yes. when it comes to joint issues and pain its likely that form of chronic pain is caused by a type of arthritis, fibromyalgia and/or some other autoimunity that is known to cause that. not certain but i just felt like that might be worth noting.

my chronic pain causes me issues with walking just like that, people without this condition dont often struggle with losing energy nor feel pain after walks or runs, uphill or otherwise, unless they have something else goig on with their body. if it effects you lower body its no surprise your mobility in that area is effected in some way too. i got myself a cane to help me with this as i walk uphill to work often (at least its one reason it helps me)

that hinderance alone, effectig your stamina, counts as debilitating, it might now sound or feel as severe as what other people expirience but it counts

it sucks that people equate age to conditions and then dont believe young people like us when we have issues, but age has nothing to do with it, you can expirience anything like this at any age for a number of reasons. i was born with a defect i my spine we didnt find until i was 18-19 and id been i pain for well over a decade now.

you'll find its hard to get people to listen to you now, but once you know what to say, for example telling them how long that this has been going on and how it effects you, even what you suspect it night be and dont let them derail from exploring those possabilities, you can /get/ them to listen to you.

sucks hard that people wont listen in the first place, especially when they think they know everything. but youre the only one whos gonna know and understand your body best because only you can listen to it when it sends you signals like pain.

(i genuinely enjoy these kinds of asks i love getting to ramble)

[russellsppttemplates]

I recently got out of a 3 day long migrane episode that was absolute horrendous, er trip and all😓 Haven't had one in almost 2 years, but this one got me hard. Maybe something that with bf Mick, if you're up to?

-🌻

Tw: migraines and its symptoms, hospital ER visit

Migraines had accompanied you for a good while now and while you hadn't suffered from them in 2 years, what you can assume was a mixture of stress from university, little sleep and changed routines triggered a massive one, Mick finding you in your shared bedroom with all the curtains closed and covers pulled around you, already assuming you hadn't been feeling that well since you asked him for some painkillers on his way home, "Schatz, what's wrong?", he said at his typical voice tone that right now seemed like he was screaming, the groan you let out concerning him even more as he approached you. Searching for his hand, you spoke quietly, "I'm having a terrible migraine", you explained, your boyfriend of just over 18 months having never seen how bad it could get, having only heard a story or two about your previous migraines. So he did what he thought best, grabbing some cool flannels for you to put on your head and have in your hands, making sure he was as quiet as possible while doing so, managing to keep the room dark as he helped your reach the things you needed, "Do you want some cuddles? I don't want to make it worse for you though", he whispered, "yes, please. Just let me lay on this side so it doesn't hurt as much", you whispered back, having managed to eat the soup he made for you and appreciating how his fingers kept running lightly through your hair, his kisses on your head attempting to help the pain.

You thought you had managed the worst of it but when the next day came around, you couldn't seem to keep anything down, the food you had eaten along with your medication coming back up, "I've never seen you like this, but I don't think this is good, my love, do you have a doctor we can call? I don't like seeing you like this", Mick whispered, his hands rubbing your cheeks confortingly as the pulsating on your head got even worse, "I have his contact on my phone", you whispered, wiping your mouth while he went to call your doctor. Coming back to you, Mick laced your fingers in his, "Dr. Edwards said that we should go to the ER, he's on call and can assess you", he said, earning a small nod from you as he helped you to the bedroom. Sitting you on the bed, he helped you rid of your clothes, his touch delicate and soft as he helped you change out of your top and into one of his comfortable hoodies and one of your sweatpants, now thanking him when, earlier in the week, he forgot to put the scented fabric softener on the load of washing you had asked him to do, "all done, my love, c'mon now, gently", he said as he helped you make your way downstairs to the car. "Thank you for doing this for me, I told you I could have called my parents", you said as you strapped yourself in, "I'm going to take care of you as best as I can, I want to", he said, kissing your cheek as he reversed out of the garage, "thank you, I love you", you said as you felt his hand on your thigh, "No need to thank me, I just want you to feel better", he said as he carefully drove to the hospital. The admission was pretty quick and after checking you, you were prescribed a stronger medication and while you waited for it to kick in, Mick was holding you against him, checking every now and again with you on how you were feeling, giving you your water and encouragung you to drink a little bit, his lips not leaving your skin for long as he peppered little kisses where he could reach.

When you were back home and feeling a lot better, actually able to keep the homemade soup down, you were cuddling on the sofa, your smaller headache allowing the quiet lullaby of one of Mick's soft playlists to actually soothe you as you tried to show him how thankful you were for him, "I love you, schatz, and I only want you to feel good, I'd do whatever it takes to make you feel better", he whispered lovingly.

(Thank you for submitting an ask 🤍! I used some information I have from my housemate because she has them too, I hope you're feeling better!)

[onlyjaeyun]

Hello baby!!

I'm pretty sure my last ask before the one asking for my emoji to be added was lost in the asks you ended up deleting, so I'm sorry that I'm only writing now!! 🥹

Honestly, today was a mess for me...like I had homework (an old exam to practice for our final exam in May) for my class in professional school tmr and my college block got stolen 2 weeks ago (like who steals an almost full college block???) so I had to do it again and I've been just putting it off again and again. (Which is my fault and ik that)

Then my friend didn't send it to me until 4 pm today despite me reminding her on friday, so I literally HAD to do it today, and what do you know... had a killer migrane the whole day that only stopped after I took meds and slept until 8 pm 🤕

So rambling aside I hope your day was a whole lot better than mine and you're doing well!!

I can't wait for the next written chap I'm so exited... I already know it'll blow me away like always baby!!

Sorry I don't really have much to say despite rambling about my day but I'll be back with more asks when the chap is out!

I love you 🫶🏻

- 🐍

hello my sweetest love!🥺 i actually looked through my asks before deleting them and i thinn tumblr ate yours :( but im so glad you checked in bc i missed you!🥺

so so so sorry you had to deal with shit like that i cant even imagine how stressful that must have been 💔💔 please make sure to take a long break and rest bc that migraine is just gonna get worse :( sending you lots of love and hope that it all works out for you

also who TF steals a college block like for WHAT?? i hate people sm

thank you sm for checking up on me baby, ive been well and honestly cant wait for you guys to resd the chap!🥺 sending you the biggest kiss rn!🩷🩷🩷

[sharoscylla]

Me again with the physical cheat sheet idea - had another one: Aside from a hex code book (which is even better of an idea I was thinking along the lines of fast and cheap xd) There is also the option to do your coloursheme traditionally and scanning that and colour pick from that and go from there. Migranes are a bitch and I'm sorry this affects you so much but I hope with these two ideas I've been helpful <3

:3 thank you mysterious stranger!! That's also a good idea... i should look into getting a cheapo scanner, I used to have a scanner but it broke RIGHT when I got a bunch of poetry+collages+drawings done for a project that I needed to scan and then I never finished it, lol...

And yeah I think these ideas will help!!!

[inkstainedhandswithrings]

Hi! Ask game? (I am once again sorry about my blog title lmao)

If you get this, answer with 3 random facts about yourself and send it to the last 7 blogs in your notifications, anonymously or not! Let's get to know the person behind the blog

(-@coruscant-sewers)

Yeah, if you wanna be okay don't go to nova's blog lol

So my brain's a little fried bc post/end migrane pain so these might not be very creative. also my inbox is currently full of strangers bc of my "Reasons why this isn't a final death" post, so... I might be boring and not send this to anyone else lol

I am the youngest out of my dad's kids (he has six, we aren't all from the same marriage. his oldest child, my brother, is 40. I am abt to turn 20. yes it's a little weird.)

I've been practicing and creating art since I was abt 12-13. not just writing like you see on here but also acting, dancing, singing, painting, etc.

I can communicate in all 5 love languages, giving and receiving (I trained myself to recognise and reciprocate them), BUT I still struggle a shit ton with receiving words of affirmation (which is why whenever someone says something nice abt me or my work on here I just go "waaaaaaaaahhh🥺🥺🥺🥺")

[eternitas]

Okay now officially:

Hi I'm back! I've been on Hiatus because of some personal stuff and then our first performance was drawing nearer. I can safely say that it went fantastic! It was last weekend and my team did absolutely amazing I am so so proud of them!

How I've been doing? Not the best. I have physical issues, especially with the performance over now my body has really had a massive shut down, I have way more headaches and migrane, my limbs hurt, I feel sluggish and tired and so exhausted, but there is little I can do. Mentally hasn't been too well either but with the performance done and a few other things I took care of now, things should get better.

I've been drawing a lot again and while I am not happy with any of it, it's still practice I suppose. I wanna at least be at that point that I can draw my stupid gay babies smooching.

I've also fallen back in love with Kuroko no Basket so there will be a lot of that as well. I will also try to get my streaming up and running again. I def still wanna appear more in my friends streams and play games together with them.

I am so looking forward to two of my best friends getting married at the end of september. Things will be okay. I will be okay.

[pressure-change]

I've been violently rejected so many times that I physically cannot reach out for help in a meaningful way that will produce results, I just get brain damage. I just tried again and gave myself an exploding migrane after hours of trying and I couldn't hit send and where I did, I deleted it.

All I can hear is "it's not that serious" "you're not capable" "i won't help you even if i can because you have to put in all the effort of telling me how to do everything even though your brain being unable to think is the entire reason you need help. because you can't think. because you need help"

And "well you can't know that" and "I'm sure it's fine to leave it alone" and "—

Killing me you're killing me with your hopelessness you're killing me you're killing me you're killing me you put me back on that floor losing my fucking sanity because I want nothing more than to be held because i will atremot to kill myself orgerwise and the door is cracked but it might as well not be because if i open if ill be yelled at she'll leave she can't stay it'll be worse he's in there he'll hurt me he'll kill me so what's the point just rot just die alone suffer alone nobody cares nobody fucking cares and nobody believes you

[tinyorangepotato]

just wanna get this out here like I do with most of my thoughts but

it's insane how the most mentally stable I've been the past fee days was yesterday where I legit ended up driving a fuck ton more than expected and got a flat tire an hour away from home while it was raining and wet out and had to change a tire on wet gravel. At least it stopped raining by that time but it still sucked. luckily I was dropping off my friend after we hung out for Halloween and he's a mechanic and was Abel to get his actual tools and help put my donut on but still, really shitty and out of everything that has made me breakdown recently, that is what should've done it yet I was fine. very frustrated and like 'god dman it' but like not even the inkling of me starting to tear up.

meanwhile today I've been completely stable. got about as much sleep as I usually get and was fairly productive. ended up looking at places to get or at leats look more into and bookmarking them and then looking and ordering some more Christmas presents for my friends and then watched YouTube.

and yet the second my brother and his girlfriend sat down and disturbed my peace (mainly just by existing in the same area and then putting on a show and talking) I went outside and haven't broken down but If I wanted to, I easily could. alreayd had tears coming down my face just because why not.

I was gonna vc with my friend to get a second opinion on the gifts (not for him though obviously. don't wanna ruin the surprise of Christmas gifts) and then they sat down and put on a movie and he said he has a headache (probably actually a migrane from the sounds of it) and so I'm sitting out in the backyard again on the swing and scrolling through tumblr since my phone hates to have internet in the house where there's internet.

so what's upset me the past few days has been;

someone else existing in the same room as me

me being slightly late for work

not being able to vc with my friend when I was looking forward to it

random peopel (my new coworkers that I haven't talked to either) not going out of their way to conversate with me

but getting a flat in the rain and getting home far later than I wanted and having to fill up gas with money I don't have did nothing to me

man fuck brains. make it make sense at the very least.

[hugespace]

My lovely people, give me your favourite GMMs/GMMores/whatever please, I feel weirdly sad tonight, and doing anything I normally enjoy isn’t helping so I just wanna fall asleep watching some good ol’ comforting episodes