#and also to help encourage pointing in younger dogs (you woah them when they have the scent of the bird before the bird flushes)

[abirddogmoment]

Rory's first session with steadiness training and she's crushing it!

[wwwafflewrites]

Never Fear (The Winchesters Are Here)

Chemical Attraction

Dean flashed you a cheesy grin. "You did good out there tonight. Proud of you." His cheeks were flushed from the alcohol, but he still seemed mostly sober.

He was checking out the group of women up at the front of the bar, who wore more revealing clothing than you dared.

You envied their confidence. Sometimes you wished you had the grit to do that stuff.

Dean didn't fake reluctance to leave you or Sam. He knew what he wanted, and he knew how to get it. When he finished his drink, he made his move, leaving the table, and you and Sam with it.

The younger Winchester smiled at you awkwardly. You could tell he wanted to leave as well—he and some girl at the bar had been making googly eyes at each other since he walked in—but was conflicted on leaving you.

"Sam," you said impatiently. "That girl has been giving you the eyes since we walked in. And don't think I don't see you sending them back. If you don't get up now, I'll push you over there."

You were glad that women weren't assuming you and Sam—or Dean—were together; it made everything much less complicated. Both of the Winchesters were way out of your league. You were more likely the sister they never had.

He was a little surprised, and a little amused by your attitude. "Oh, really?"

"Don't test me," you joked.

He laughed, collecting his jacket and walking away.

Your deluding smile fell from your face once you were alone. Bars were usually their choice of festivity, but they mostly just made you uncomfortable.

You were now alone, as both of the boys hit on some chicks and snuck off to get laid. You were used to it. It wasn’t your ideal celebration, but if it made them happy, you'd bear it. You supposed they just assumed your interests matched theirs. Even if all you wanted to do was go home and sleep.

Anyway, the faster the Winchesters both left with broads, the faster you could leave. It was just that simple.

You sipped your whiskey that Dean had paid for. It was strong, and hard to swallow, but in small portions it was tolerable. You appreciated the gift, even if it wasn't your preferred drink. Dean had a big heart, and you wouldn’t ruin your sweet moments with him because you were feeling picky.

You let your mind wander to a darker place.

You were still coming to terms with hunter life. And from what you've gathered, it was cruel, unfair, and thankless.

The Winchesters didn’t sugarcoat it, either. Everything that society looked down upon—the suspiciously cult-ish tattoos, borderline or over-the-line alcoholism (a line you were uncertain where Dean fell), and cheap clothing with leather jackets—was a signature of a hunter’s life. Not to mention the trigger-happy hands, suspicious glares, and their off-putting, dark looks.

It opened your eyes.

That "gothic" girl you saw in your neighborhood? That might have looked like a satanic tattoo, but it was actually an anti-possession tattoo that she got because she was terrified of the demons that wanted to kill her. And those knives in her pocket and backpack? That was for her safety, and probably yours, too.

Or that shady alcoholic up the street? Werewolves brutally murdered his friends, and he has to live with the survivor's guilt. He drinks while obsessively researching how to hunt them down. Though he'll likely die of a failing liver before ever taking on the pack.

The point was…

Looks weren’t always transparent.

And, well, you were everything hunters weren't.

Your pain tolerance was pathetic, for one. Tattoos? Big nope. You hated all things needles, and despite tattoos looking cool, you liked to avoid pain, thanks.

Second, your wardrobe. As if that wasn't blatantly obvious.

And, last, you were a hopeless lightweight. A few shots and you were tipsy. Dean thought it was hilarious.

Still, you drank your whiskey, feeling guilty that you hated it.

You were tired. It was dark out, and you could already feel the whiskey in your system. You just wanted to go home.

So the last thing you expected that night was for a guy to hit on you. You, feeling unlike yourself—and very drunk—warily flirted back.

He was charming. Thing was, with your buzzing vision, all you noticed were his eyes and handsome smile. You didn’t notice the more important things, like, say… the roofies dissolving in your drink.

Too bad you hadn’t—because you wouldn't have let him breathe down your neck like he had been… or breathe at all, for that matter.

Your words slurred, and you leaned into him when he stood. "Hey, hey, h-hey, mister. Wheeere ya' goin' off to?"

You were smashed.

You didn’t feel too hot, either. You were practically dangling off his shoulders as he helped you from your chair, and your stomach churned. "I don' feel so guud…" you slurred, keeling over to vomit on the pavement. Huh. You were outside?

You made out two shapes that looked dubiously like him. Albeit one may have very well been a trash can. "Yeeuur kindouf prr...retty."

He snickered, though you weren't sure what was so funny. "Just let it sink in," he said. "It's okay, babe."

What was he talking about? You frowned, troubled. "Doe… don'ttt… calmeh that."

There was only a muddy sense of direction. You fizzled in and out of consciousness, and your memory escaped you.

You were completely at this man's mercy.

///

You woke up feeling like hell. The lights… the sounds…it was all too loud.

Your head felt like a crushed soda can. You turned—inch by inch—trying to get a view of the entire room, tied up—which, yeah, was a big red flag—and leaned awkwardly against the wall. When you finally saw behind you, you met the eyes of multiple other women in your same predicament.

The previous evening was a haze. Your mind was still catching up with the present, much less the past.

Something in the shadows of the room moved, and you watched as two figures loomed over an unconscious woman covered in dark, bloody bites around her neck and chest.

"Vamps," you spat. But it came more like "vamffptss" through your gag with a few lisp-y expletives.

They spun around, smiling to themselves. A vampire crouched down to your level, taunting you, "Ah, so there is more to her than a pretty face! Who would have known? Are you a hunter, babe?"

A memory clicked as he said that. You might say it rang a bell—an alarm bell, anyway—but you couldn't place it. His voice was bouncing around in your head and it was hard to focus.

"Sssgrew you."

He stood, gave you a smirk, and drove his foot into your abdomen. Hard.

"Wow. I mean, you were a little feisty at the bar, but I never would have envisioned you'd have so much kick." He winked at you, then turned back to his goonies. "Alright. Ship 'em. Mark the pretty ones. They'll be worth more."

You puffed, still recovering from the harsh blow, as a skinny redhead yanked you up by the ropes. He was watching you like one looks in a microwave at their meal.

You thrashed. It was a weak move, hardly knocking him back on his heels, but it was also a minor triumph.

Then said vampire punched your throat, and all smugness disappeared.

The lead vamp turned to see the commotion and erupted, "Are you kidding me? Christ—get the gag off her, will you?!" When the others looked at him in alarm and skepticism, he barked, "She’s no use to us dead! Do you want her suffocating?"

Carrot Top worked the gag from your aching jaw, and you just laid there, winded, like a dead dog.

The Lead Vamp grabbed the shirt collar of your redhead attacker. "Hey, maybe don't punch 'em in the throat next time. They're gonna squirm a little—it's what they do. So ignore it."

"Yessir'."

"Good. And, hey, guys—bag the ugly ones. I got a client for them."

You coughed, propping yourself up by the elbow. You were concerned. Am I ugly?

The redhead vamp kicked you down by your arm, hissing, "Not you. We got a special guy for you. Likes the fighters."

You were so tired and weak and helpless. Couldn't do anything but lay there. You could only watch as the other vamps manhandled poor, terrified women.

"Leeches," you said, earning you a foot to the face.

"Do yourself a favor and shut up."

It was hard to not comply. As your head lolled, you spat blood at his feet. You would not go down easy.

He hauled you up, and his punch cracked like a whip.

You stared at his bloody knuckles, feeling your own arms twitch. The ropes were loose. You wondered briefly if you could even run—

Another strike had your vision swimming with stars.

"Hey. I got a question—huff—" You said, taking the punches like a champ and distracting him. "Has anyone ever told you—uff—that you look like—guh—Strawberry Shortcake?"

The ropes worked off your wrists and when he swung, you ducked—or fell, more like—away from his swing. Breathless, you pulled yourself to your feet to run.

The adrenaline was really the only thing keeping you going. Thing was, adrenaline didn't give you accuracy, it just gave you strength. And little that strength was.

And, woah, was the ground spinning. You gagged as you watched the hallway sway. You were not in any shape to run, but you sure as hell tried to. You stumbled down the hallway, your knees giving out multiple times before you couldn’t pick yourself up again.

The vamp's yell echoed down the hallway. "You're not a hunter anymore, little lamb! You're the hunted!" It probably wouldn't take much for him to follow the sound of your hummingbird heart.

That was enough encouragement to get anyone on their toes. Even someone who was shaking like a leaf.

Whatever roofie they'd given you, it was enhanced. Everything was so hot and bright and loud. You wished the world could just be quiet. Your heart was beating so loud you could feel it in your teeth.

You clambered to the exit, reaching for the doors to push them open.

Just then, a hand pitched you backward, pulling down on your shoulder. You yelled out, petrified.

"It's me, it's just me," Dean whispered quickly, easing you through the door, around the corner, and to where Baby was parked.

Your heart was still jack hammering in your chest as he pulled you in for a hug. You were high as a kite on adrenaline.

"Been looking all over for you." The pitch in his voice was more stressed than usual. You were like a little sister to him.

You leaned into his embrace. It was warm and solid and safe. And it was exactly what you needed to ground yourself.

"He drugged me," you blurted. "He drugged me. I couldn’t—he just—"

He paled. "Did he touch you?" When you paused, his expression darkened. "I'll rip his lungs out. I'll kill every single one of them. I'll—"

"He didn't touch me," you interrupted. "Not like that." You rested your forehead against his chest.

"Thank god."

"But I think they would've." You practically melted as he smoothed your hair down. "They're human trafficking. Selling women as blood bags."

Dean turned to Sam, who was leaned up against the Impala, and nodded at him. Sam took that as his cue to go ahead without Dean. "I got Sammy on it right now. You sure you're alright?"

His arms around you were the only thing keeping you standing. "Just tired. And my head really hurts." Gunshots went off behind you, and you flinched. Your ears were still sensitive.

"Sounds like nothing a little sleep can't fix." Dean patted your back and opened the back of the Impala.

You crawled in and fell asleep before Dean could even pull out of the parking lot.

"Let's get you home," he breathed.

[flyaway-33]

Yesterday pt. 4

“Rog. Come home with me.”

Come home with me. Roger sucked in a gulp of air as he processed those words. Come home with me. It wouldn’t work, no way. His mom would be suspicious, his father would be beyond angry, his sister would be devastated. They’d all known about his upcoming month-long winter break as long as he’d been away at school, they were planning on him being home all month, and what would he tell them? ‘Oh sorry, I don’t want to come home so I’m going to play house with my fuck buddy for the month’? There was no way. There was also the impossibly stressful scenario of meeting and spending time with your family. Adults usually loved him but would they somehow find out about your arrangement? Would they see through Roger’s well manicured facade that he wasn’t completely head over heels for you? Because he was. They definitely wouldn’t love him then. He felt the familiar swell of anxiety in his chest as he mulled over the possibilities. He wanted so badly to go home with you, so badly the thought alone hurt. But he was so, so scared.

You felt him tense in your arms at your words and you didn’t understand. Didn’t he want an escape? You stayed silent, picking up the rhythm of rubbing his arms soothingly as he sat in painful silence. It was hard for you to stop your racing thoughts and take in the weight of what had just told you, how hard it must have been for him to let you in to this most closed off secret of his. 

He was abused.

It hurt to think about it. You wanted— no, needed to keep him safe. 

“Roger?” You cautiously moved beneath him to get him to look at you and in his big blue eyes you could see panic. “Tell me what’s on your mind.” Your voice was low, quiet, and soothing. He noticeably relaxed.

“I, uh…” he met your eyes before averting his to his hands where his fingers were fraying a small hole in his shirt, making it grow as he fidgeted. He knew there was no point hiding any of his thoughts from you now. “I don’t want to disappoint anyone. They all expect me to come home.”

“Then just come for a few weeks, even a few days, okay? You can go home for Christmas and New Year’s. Tell them you’re visiting a friend and that you’ll be home for the holidays. You’re an adult, they can’t really make a huge fuss about it, can they?”

“You’re underestimating them,” he sighed, but continued hastily when he saw the concern in your eyes, “I mean my sister— she’s dramatic as hell, she’ll act like I abandoned her if I don’t come back when I said I would. Ma would just be sad, and dad would be mad at me for upsetting them.”

Their family dynamic confused you to no end so you just shook your head. “Well my family is dying to meet you, Rog, so if using that as an excuse would help, you wouldn’t be lying. I’ve told my mom and sister all about you.”

He gave you a confused and incredulous look and you knew where his mind was going.

“Not everything, you dork,” You laughed playfully swatting at him.

Roger’s big, blue orbs met yours, clouded with doubt and anxiety, but you could see his resolve crumbling. “Well okay, guess it won’t hurt to try,” he sighed, moving out of your arms so that he could reach the phone on the wall. “I guess I’ll tell them I’m visiting your family then.” There was a hopeful, beautiful smile growing on his plump lips. You had won, he would be safe even if just for a few days longer. “Hello, Ma?” She had picked up. “I’m well, yes finals went okay, I think… Actually, about that, my friend, Y/N wants me to come meet her family and stay for a bit before I head home, you know Surrey is on the way… Yes I know I said I’d be home but she says her mother wants to meet me, and… Yes, Ma, she’s a girl, Y/N, the girl I’ve told you about… No ma’am, we’re just best friends.” He glanced at you, his cheeks coloring in embarrassment, but you smiled in encouragement. “I’m not sure how long yet but I promise I’ll be home for the holidays… Okay, I promise I’ll call, I always do. I love you, too. Bye bye.”

“Well?” You asked, smiling as you had already inferred the answer. 

“She was reluctant, but, I’ll be coming home with you.” The joy on his face was palpable and you heart swelled with overwhelming relief and joy, knowing you could keep him with you, keep him safe.

“Oh, excellent!” You shouted, clapping your hands. “Oh, Roggie you’re going to love my family! I have a dog, Libby, and my little sister will adore you, my little brother will idolize you, you must teach him to drum.”

“Woah woah, slow down.” Roger sighed, his smile fading as he placed his hands on your shoulders to calm you. “They have to meet me first, I don’t want you to get your hopes up thinking this will be some kind of fairy tale…” He looked down at the floor then, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. There was no way he could explain why he was all of a sudden so self conscious, because he truly was overjoyed that he was able to come home with you, but his nervousness was making him feel sick. He didn’t want anything to change between the two of you, and meeting your family almost certainly meant change. “What if they hate me?” He voiced his thoughts, big doe eyes coming back up to meet yours. “What if they forbid me to see you again?” 

“But what if they love you, darling?” You hummed as you placed your hand on his soft, warm cheek, running your thumb over a stray tear that was slowly sliding down. 

 *****

Finals ended and you and Roger both felt pretty good about them. The two of you would have the results in the mail by the new year. You packed up your rooms and piled all your stuff into the front of your ’63 VW beetle with Roger’s drums taking up the back seat. It was just about an hour drive with traffic to your home in Surrey and you were buzzing with excitement to finally introduce Roger to your family. He seemed pretty excited too, which made you feel a bit better as you hated seeing him upset or anxious. You were relieved that you were bringing him somewhere safe where he would be loved and accepted. 

The plan the two of you had developed was that he would be staying at your house until the 23rd of December and then would travel back to his own home in Cornwall via train. But for now, it was your family the two of you had to deal with. They were going to be obnoxious about you bringing a boy home. No matter how much the two of you were going to deny being together you knew your family would sense that something was up. They were going to tease and annoy you for the entire two weeks until Christmas, but it was worth it to be with him.

Roger was practically bouncing with excitement in the passenger seat of your car as you pulled on to the highway that would take you home. He’d been chattering nonstop about how excited he was to meet your family, most notably your dog, which made you laugh fondly. In his anxious excitement he was flipping madly through the radio stations trying desperately to find something good to listen to before giving up entirely and switching off your radio.

“Hey!” You protested.

“No I have an idea! Clap along.” He began to create a rhythm by first clapping twice then patting his legs twice and repeating.

“Rog, I’m driving.”

“Fine then just sing along.” Then he gave a devious smile and began to sing. Immediately the beat began to make sense and you knew it was what he, a percussionist, heard when he listened to the song in question.

“In the town where I was born, Lived a man who sailed to sea” he sang merrily, waggling his eyebrows at you with a goofy grin, his hair sticking up messily in all directions making him look like a little boy. Yellow Submarine, another Beatles favorite of yours, never failed to put you in a good mood.

“And he told us of his life, In the land of submarines” you joined, and you could hold back the huge smile that formed on your face as he continued and the two of you switched singing each couplet and together sang the chorus. He was so much fun, no one else could make a boring old car ride as interesting as Roger, and no one could enjoy singing too-loud a cappella in said car with you like he could. 

“They had to have been on copious amounts of drugs,” you laughed after the two of you had faded into a fit of laughter in the middle of the second verse. 

“Well, duh. Have you heard Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds?”

“Ah, good old LSD.” You fell into another fit of laughter and the rest of the car ride seemed to fly by with the two of you singing like idiots. Roger was a blast and you felt closer to him than ever, if that were even possible.

When meeting your parents Roger was the perfect gentleman. He stood straight, looked them in the eye and gave your father a firm handshake with a glowing smile. Libby, your family’s golden retriever puppy wouldn’t leave him alone, your 15 year old sister was practically drooling over him, and your 11 year old little brother was infatuated with Roger’s stories about his band back home and how they’d won several music competitions. After a dinner filled with the most family-friendly stories from college he even helped your mother clean up the kitchen. Everyone retired to the family room to listen to the radio for a bit and get to know your “best friend” Roger more. He was an absolute smash hit with them, especially when he got to talking to your dad about music and they gushed over Hendrix for nearly an hour. They had nearly the same tastes and your father regarded Roger as a “smart kid” before he got up to get ready for bed, signaling the younger children to do the same. Your mother, however, eyed you suspiciously.

“Y/N, sweetheart, what are the, uhm, sleeping arrangements for this visit?” Your mother asked, looking slightly perturbed. 

“Oh mum, I figured Rog and I could share my room.”

“I’ll sleep on the floor, ma’am.” Roger interjected quickly as her eyes went wide.

“No! Nonsense, Y/N, do you think I’m a bloody idiot?” Your mum cried.

“Mum, we’ll keep the door open! All night, wide open. I don’t want to shun Rog to the bloody couch! He’s my best friend and he is a guest, he deserves proper arrangements.”

Your mother was fuming but you could see her resolve crumbling in her sleepy state. “Fine. But you two are not to be behind any closed doors alone together, do you understand?” She was glaring more at Roger than you.

Poor Roger looked terrified with his already large, blue eyes opened much wider than normal and his complexion ghostly white from pure fear. He nodded vigorously, trying to regain his composure. “Yes ma’am, of course, ma’am.”

“Alright.” She sighed, satisfied with the fear of God she’d just put into this shabby looking, odd, hippy boy you’d brought home. “Don’t take me for a fool. Deny all you want but I know something’s going on between the two of you.” With that she stood and swiftly followed where your father and siblings had disappeared to the second story of the house just minutes earlier.

“Jesus,” you sighed, turning to Rog whose cheeks had gone from white to scarlet in embarrassment. “I’m sorry about that. I warned you.”

“Yeah, well, coulda been worse I reckon,” he shrugged, beginning to relax. “At least we can stay together. Otherwise, they’re all quite lovely.”

You sent up a small prayer the two of you wouldn’t get yourselves murdered by your parents during his stay and smiled softly as you stood to lead him up the stairs to your room. 

A/N: First of all,  I am so sorry this took so long and I am so sorry that it is short and uninteresting. I did not plan on how much overtime I have had to work this summer and it is brutal. my life is an actual shit show at the moment but i’m alive! Also, I am so sorry to the one or two other people who wanted to be tagged in this. I thought I had tagged my answers to your asks but I can’t find them, this time I will keep an actual list in my notes :(

but otherwise my “taglist” only consists of the lovely @luvborhap​ for now.

Ask, message, or comment if you’d like to be tagged! it would make my day! I promise I'll write you down and not forget this time! and as always I accept constructive criticisms and all friendly comments. Thanks for reading, loves! :)

[sunflowerstache]

Not So Bad In L.A

A/N: omg wow okay hi guys! So I’ve been planning and working on this for about 2 weeks now and I am finally ready to post it! This is my first ever chapter to my first ever fic! I really hope you guys send me some feedback as I really want to make this a great story for y'all! This first chapter is kind of more of an informational to y/n’s background, but I promise Harry will make his appearance starting next chapter!

A special thank you so much to these beautiful ladies for the constant encouragement and love! @harrygivenchy @customhucci @loveharryx @bridge-to-terabethia @ultravxl @pinkflowerharry @swayingnoodlelove everyone else from Harry’s Bingo Hall, and @emotionally-imbruised I adore you all!

and a special thanks to @theasstour for being my inspiration and the first ever person to read this fic... love you lots! 

Also, if by any chance you want to be tagged in the next parts, have questions or any suggestions about the fic, just let me know, I love hearing from y'all! okay, love you, please enjoy!

Chapter 1:  She’s Got A Family In Carolina

        January 2017

Word Count: 2.1k

Masterlist       Fic Masterlist

Next Chapter

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One may think living in the South means constantly wiping beads of sweat from your forehead and the sun always shining, but here you were, freezing your ass off while the rain pelted you in the face. Checking your watch for the third time, you swiftly ran across the street, making sure to wave a quick “thank you” to the cars who let you pass. It had been raining for the past six days in Charleston, and it was easy to tell everyone was beginning to move from irritated to borderline insane from being cooped up inside all day everyday. You pushed open the door to Gnome Cafe and shook the excess rain from your umbrella before making your way over to a table in the corner of the room.

         “Sorry I’m late. I was finishing an episode of Brooklyn Nine Nine.” you shrugged, shimmying out of your pink rain jacket and placing it on the back of your chair.

           “At least tell me it was a good one.” Bri rolled her eyes

           “The whole series is good, what do you mean ‘a good one’?” Sav argued while taking a bite of her salad.

           “The one when Hitchcock drank his fish.” You smiled, knowing it was one of Bri’s favorites, “Thanks for ordering for me.” You mumbled around your sandwich while the three girls around you agreed that it was a decent enough episode to be late to lunch for.

           “Okay, onto actual important things; LA.” Bella gleamed while clapping her hands together.

The Four Whores. That’s the name Isabella- Bella, had dubbed your group way back in the eighth grade. Bella’s mom and your mom had been best friends growing up and had gotten pregnant at the same time, consequently resulting in Bella being your best friend since the day you were born. The two of you had met Brianna – Bri, and Savannah – Sav, shortly after at the start of the sixth grade. From then on, the four of you had been inseparable. Constant sleepovers, sharing clothes, going to prom together, and even winning “Best best friends” in your last year of high school. And finally, after 22 years of living in South Carolina, the four of you had finally signed a lease for an apartment in Los Angeles, California.

           “Yes, okay, so…” putting your food back down on the plate, you leaned over to pull manila envelopes out of your black bag and handed them to the girls, “The leasing office sent over all the last minute extra information about the place and we are officially all set to move next week on January 7th.”

A gaggle of cheers was heard around the table and echoed through the small café, causing other patrons to glare in your direction. The four of you had been waiting for this day for what seemed like forever. Sav and Bri were the first ones to suggest the move about two years ago, as they were both fashion majors and thought L.A would be a great place to start their careers. Bella was fortunate enough to come from a family who had money – cumulatively the family had six Law Firms – so moving around for her wasn’t an issue. Making the move out to L.A was a bit for different story for you. Of course, you wanted nothing more than to pack up and start your life with your best friends, but leaving your family was hard. It was well known that out of the four of you, you were the closest to your family, especially your younger sister, Morgan. She was only 2 years younger than you, having just turned 20, and the two of you were incredibly close. She was the person you told everything to, the person you cuddled with on the couch when watching HGTV, she was just your person. So finally making the decision to move across the country was a hard thing to decide. Slightly shaking your head, you rejoined the girls and discussed plans to ship all your belongings out to California and then the conversations merged into any trips you all had coming up after the move.

           “Speaking of upcoming trips, will you please call Nicholas. He texted me 9 times yesterday asking about his stay.”  Sav laughed, signaling to the waitress for our check.

           “That little shit. He literally just booked the flight on Thursday. There’s like a month before he even gets in.” You laughed, shaking your head

Nicholas Grimshaw. It was definitely the oddest friendship you had made throughout your years in college. You were 19 and had somehow ended up at a party in London 3 years ago that he was attending and the Four Whores – more specifically Bella -- had quickly weaseled your way into the VIP section and made friends with the Brit and his gang. And ever since, even though you only got to see him every so often when he was stateside, or you got to London, you both were extremely close. He had called you up one night, unwilling to tell you the reason for his trip into California, but requesting to spend a couple days with you and the girls since “You won’t even know anyone there at that point. You need me to help you socialize.” So, you spoke to the girls and they all agreed it was time to have a visit from good old St. Nick.

           “Well, call him, he’s getting on my last nerve.”

           “Don’t even get me started on last nerves, mom’s been on my case about this move, so I gotta get home and make sure she isn’t having an aneurism.” Sav’s mom had always been a bit weary of the four of us together and most of the decisions we make, so it was no surprise she was voicing her concerns.

           “Yeah, it’s been a pleasure ladies, but I’ve got to get back to work.”

           “Y/N sitting on the couch doesn’t count as going to work you know.” Bri laughed as you all popped your umbrellas and left the small café.

           “Ha-Ha very funny. For your information, I have a phone interview later and have to get my portfolio together to send them.” Sticking your tongue out, and making the girls laugh with excited variations of “Good Luck!” falling from their lips, you all walked your separate ways, back down the wet, cobblestone, streets of downtown Charleston.

                       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           “I just can’t believe you’re actually leavin’ me. It’s like you want me to suffer living here alone with mom and dad.” Morgan moaned

           “I do find it quite interesting you didn’t invite Morg to join the lot of you on this new life journey.” A voice piped up

Morgan was laying on her back, with her head hanging off your bed and had been complaining for the past twenty minutes about having to stay home by herself while you moved across the country. Knowing he would always take her side, Morgan facetimed Nick from your laptop and now here you were, packing your room while being harassed by your sister and a friend 4,000 miles away.

           “Okay, I already get enough of that from her Nicholas, I don’t need it from the peanut gallery too. And you do realize you don’t have to stay here, right Morg? You can move on campus literally anytime you want - Do you still have my thigh high boots? The black lace up ones?”

           “Hey, I was pulled away from a perfectly good bottle of wine and my couch for this - not that I mind hun – so don’t yell at me.” He laughed, finishing his glass of red wine

           “Well miss ‘I get paid just to travel’ some of us don’t have- “

           “Ah-Ha! I found them!” you interrupted, pulling your favorite pair of boots from the bottom of your closet

           “Anyways, as I was saying, I’m not payin’ for room and board on top of med school tuition. That shit’s expensive enough as it is.”

           “Just think of all the money you’re gonna make when you’re some big timey doctor with her own practice. You’re gonna blow me, and mom and dad, out of the water, so hush up about how much shit costs. Everyone’s in debt these days, who cares.”

           “Nick would let me move in with him.” She grumbled

           “Woah there love, you know I adore you like my own sister,” The two of them had hit it off from the moment they met, which was the best thing you could have hoped for, “but not enough to take care o’yeh. I wouldn’t know what to do. Like what do you eat?” Nick’s eyes widened at the thought of Morgan moving in with him

           “I’m not a dog Nick. I eat food like every other human.” She laughed, rolling onto her stomach and turning the laptop so she could directly FaceTime with Nick

A few months after your first met in London, Nick had had some time off and decided that he would take a tip into the states before he was needed back at BBC Radio. So, he flew into Charleston after spending some time with friends in Los Angeles and was immediately obsessed with Morgan.  Of course, she knew who he was – thanks to her many years of obsessing over One Direction – and was thrilled to spend time with him. From then on, he looked at her, and treated her, as a younger sister, something you were extremely grateful for, considering how difficult the last two years have been on Morgan.

           “On the topic of royalty,” Nick’s voice pulled you from your thoughts, “Don’t make any plans the 28th.” He grinned wickedly as Morgan turned the laptop back to face you sitting on the floor.

           “Bold of you to assume we don’t already have plans that night.”

           “Oh, I know they all do. You’re the one who doesn’t. Bri and Sav will be off doing some fashion thing, and you know Bella will have found a man by then, so she’ll be gone. Which leaves you all by yourself. So, I’m taking you out.” He had hit the nail on the head for your gang.

Savannah and Bri had always been extremely work driven. They knew what they wanted to do since they were young and have been working towards it ever since. Not to say you and Bella weren’t the same way, but the two of you liked to enjoy the slow process of your careers and where they took you instead. And Bella had always been someone who craved affection, so it was no surprise when she had a new boy toy every couple of weeks. None really lasted too long as “they all try really hard to become a serious relationship and I’m just not into that! I’m just a girl with needs!”. You on the other hand, enjoyed spending time at home. You traveled quite often for work so when you got the chance to stay in home and relax, you did just that. And Nick never lets you live it down.

           “How many times do I have to tell you, I’m not as much of a hermit as you make me out to be. I just like relaxing when I’m not working.”

           “I don’t care. I already made the plans, and we’re meeting up with other friends of mine, so you can’t back out now.” He shrugged

           “Nick,” You whined, “I don’t need you playing friend matchmaker for us okay. We’re big girls, we can do it on our own.”

           “I’m not doing this for you love. They were already going to be there so we’re just tagging along. “

           “Fine. At least tell me where we’re going?”

           “Not a chance. Los Angeles is the land of the free baby. Anything can happen. And I promise you, you’ll enjoy yourself.”

Nick was many things; a radio host, a loud mouth, a sincere friend, a bit of a light weight, but he was not a liar. And it was clear he wasn’t only talking about the night he had planned for you both. Los Angeles was going to change your life, you just had to buckle in and enjoy the ride.

[another-tevinter-heist]

Grey Warden Pizzeria Ch. 3

Alistair went ahead and showed Kani all the ropes. Whenever the store was opened in the morning, the cash register needed to be counted to make sure it had the right amount of money in it. Then the computer system needed to be started up so that customers could be checked out once the store was open to the public. Stools pulled down from the bar and chairs down from the table. Oven heated up, meet the farmer’s market merchant at the back door for the daily delivery of materials, and etcetera. Kani loved the place already as is was very aesthetically pleasing to the eye. Most pizzerias would have the typical Italian guy with a big mustache hanging somewhere with black and white tile with red tables, but this was classier than that. The floor looked like black marble tile and the walls were a soft green. It was like the feeling she had felt when she explored the forests in the mountains. It was comforting, felt like home, and welcoming. The tables were all mahogany as were the chairs, stools, and the bar. There were even some potted plants on the bar. Upon closer inspection, they were basil and oregano plants. Everything here was fresh.

“Wow, this place is beautiful.” Kani murmured as she stood behind the bar while Alistair started to process some of the fresh wheat into flour.

“Yeah, Duncan made sure the place was spotless last week. Told me I have to be better at maintaining it. Guess this is what he meant. You mind starting the sauce?”

“Yeah sure.” Kani pulled on her apron and started working with the tomatoes.

In the meantime, Barkspawn curled up in front of the brick oven, appreciating the warmth it gave. Kani looked at Alistair and asked if she could go across the street to the general store to get him some food and a collar while she waited for the tomatoes to be ready to turn into sauce. He looked at the sleeping dog and waved her off. Kani ran across the street and bought him two bowls, a small bag of dog food, and a green collar. She would have to make a name tag for him, which wouldn’t be too difficult. She went ahead and grabbed him a bone to chew on as well before checking out and running back across the street. When she walked back in, Barkspawn perked his head up at the rustling of food. Kani set up his food and water by the bathroom. As soon as food hit the bottom of the bowl, Barkspawn bolted over with his tail wagging so hard he almost caused himself to fall. Kani laughed and made sure the bowl was full before stepping away so he could eat. She would put the collar on him later. He would also need to go to the vet.

“I think the sauce needs your attention. Here’s what we spice it with.” Alistair called her over and she washed her hands before going back to work.

“We don’t open to the public until noon, but we have to be here at five thirty in the morning?” Kani asked some time later. They were currently waiting on dough to rise, so it would be ready to work with later.

“Yep, it’s peaceful sometimes. Gives me time to think, not that I do a whole lot of that. But we used to have students that would read or do homework about now.” Alistair sat at the bar, spinning his phone beneath his finger on the wood counter.

“I could bring my laptop and do some schoolwork then?” Kani’s eyebrow rose. This sounded promising. She wasn’t sure how she was going to manage college and a management position like this. She had originally applied for the position because it was part time. She had surprised herself by staying. She just really couldn’t say no to Duncan when so many people had left. Luckily, she did have some management skills. In another town she had lived in she had worked in a clothing store as the manager for a while. They were there for a wedding, so it lasted a good long while. All Dalish weddings did.

“What’s that on your wrist?” Alistair pointed across the counter to her.

“Oh this,” she looked at the tattoo of a tree on her wrist, “It’s a symbol of our gods, I guess. They’re more of spirits or ancestors I guess. Like in Chinese culture they have great respect for their ancestors. This one is for Mythal, who represents love and justice. Our Keeper chose it for me, she said it just fit my personality very well. I’ve always tried saving animals and defending others, so I guess it makes sense.”

“That’s really cool. What are the others that one can get?” Alistair stopped spinning his phone and looked her in the face in interest.

She blinked in surprise. “Uh, well there is Elgar’nan who is the spirit of vengeance,” she continued explaining each of her gods to him and their purpose in her culture. He patiently listened and asked questions like where the tattoos could be placed, who did them, how they were picked, and more.

“Some people get them on their face?” Alistair looked appalled.

“Mostly the older elves in our clans have them. Us of the younger generation will normally have them on our collars, wrists, or ankles. I did see one Dalish from another clan who had it as a “tramp stamp” as most people call them. It was for Andruil, and very well done. My grandmother did not approve. Especially as it was bright pink and on a male.”

“Do the older elves not approve of people like that?” Alistair furrowed his brows.

“Most don’t care actually. My grandmother is just sore that my grandfather left her for another man. He’s quite nice actually. She became super anti-LGBT after that. I talked to the young man with the tattoo later. He was actually transgender and thinking of getting a blue one as kind of a second layer and making it purple where it met the pink. I thought it was a lovely sentiment.” Kani smiled softly at Alistair. He was so easy to talk to and such a good listener.

“That does sound pretty cool, I’ll admit. I would never do such a thing, but I’m glad he is encouraged to be himself.” Alistair smiled and then looked at the door.

“What?” Kani stopped leaning on her elbows and stood on her toes to look out the door.

“I thought I heard someone. Plus, we are supposed to have some applicants come in before we open up. That way we can do some training if we decide to keep them.”

“I suppose we will be keeping anyone who comes in?” Kani looked back at the blonde with a teasing smile.

“Well, I suppose we cannot afford to turn anyone away with how our employment rate has been going, now can we?” Alistair sighed and turned back to her just as two women knocked on the door.

Barkspawn stood and barked loudly at the newcomers. Alistair stood and let the two women in. One was an old woman dressed in a plain brown dress with cropped hair. The other was a woman who looked about Kani’s age. She had dark hair up in a bun and dark eyeshadow and lipstick. She wore a red crop top, gold feather necklace, feather belly button ring, torn black jeans, and combat boots. Alistair looked a little apprehensive and Kani sighed internally.

“Hello, welcome!” Kani came around the counter and smiled at the two, “how can I help you today?”

“See, daughter? Such manners!” The older woman smiled at Kani. “My name is Flemeth, and this is my daughter Morrigan. She is here to apply for the open position.”

“I can speak for myself, mother.” Morrigan sighed, sounding like she was scolding her own mother.

“It’s very nice to meet you both. What are your skills, Morrigan?” Kani smiled gently at the woman.

“I have knowledge of many things. I have an herb garden back home that I tend to as well as some other plants. I believe a few of your plants here are from my garden, so it would be most simple for me to care for them. I also have experience selling my plants, so I can manage money well.” Morrigan replied simply.

Barkspawn barked happily at Morrigan. “Have you ever worked in a restaurant before?” Alistair crossed his arms.

“I have not, although I cook much of the time at home, so I do not see that being an issue.” Morrigan looked at Alistair with disdain.

“Well, sounds good enough to me. What’s your availability?” Kani asked.

“Woah, you’ve only asked her two questions!” Alistair looked at Kani suddenly.

“I had heard that many of your employees left. If it is only the two of you, then you will need help soon, won’t you? It seems like you don’t have much of a choice. She will not be a burden on you.” Flemeth chuckled gently.

“She’s right.” Kani nodded.

“So I have no say in this, do I?” Morrigan sighed.

“Well, we would be happy to have you. I’d be more than glad to teach you what I’ve learned so far.”

Alistair gave Kani a disapproving side glance, but Morrigan pretended not to notice. “Alright, I’ll take the position, which is?”

“Well, I’m a manager and head chef, as is Kani here. So I guess that puts you as cashier.” Alistair smirked.

“Ignore him, you can keep the books in regards to our fresh produce and help make pizzas too. Come on.” Kani smiled and led Morrigan behind the counter and started showing her around.

“You are quite outnumbered, son.” Flemeth laughed.

“Apparently so,” Alistair replied and went back to work.

[ppandfm]

Parties, Formal Meetings & Pinetrees  Chapter: 6

Description: The Chapter of Purple Dildos, Kidnappings, and Richies with Shit Weed.

Two weeks.

Two fucking weeks without a single text from Dipper.

Bill wasn’t exactly pissed, but he wasn’t exactly calm about it either. Really, he was just anxious. His henchmaniacs friends had noticed and tried to cheer him up, but nothing worked. He barely left his apartment lair. One day, Pyronica stormed into his house with Xanthar and hits him on the back of the head.

“Ow! What the hell, Ronnie?”

“You need to stop this. Go see him. I’ll hold down the fort.”

“I don’t even know if he wants to see me anymore. It’s been two weeks. What if he realised I’m the opposite of what he needs right now and deleted my number?”

“Oh my god, you’re hopeless. Go fuck his brains out. That’ll make him remember you.”

“Ronnie, this is serious.”

“You’re seriously bumming everyone out. Even Xanthar is feeling blue.”

Bill thought of the group’s precious dog and sighed, “Fine. I’ll go see him.”

Dipper didn’t think that his parents would be home by that night, as they were supposed to be home in four weeks. Yet here they were and everything was back to normal.

Well, except that one thing. That thing being Bill.

Now he had to keep his friend a secret and hide his phone more often from his parents to keep him from being caught. They’d kill him, bring him back from the dead, and then kill him again. Dipper ate his breakfast slowly in thought.

“So Mabel how was school yesterday?” Their mom looked over at Mabel with a sense of grace. Dipper knew where Mrs. Northwest was the Diamond of the rich community, their mother was the pearl. She was always wearing jewelry that made her shine and stand out from everyone else. Her beauty the most recognizable amongst the family. It was no wonder why everyone said Mabel looked just like her. Their mother wouldn’t hesitate to give her opinion if she found out about Bill.

“It was great as usual! I’m hosting a knitting club now!”

“Really? That’s wonderful sweetie!”

“Oh- Mason remember what I told you about thinking too much at the table. Remember? You nearly put your face in your cereal?”

Dipper looked up, blushing. “S-Sorry Mom.”

“So, Mason, how did it feel being the man of the house for a change?” said their dad, who was sitting at the end of the table. Their dad was known for his business throughout Piedmont, working along with the Gleefuls and Northwests. Besides their money coming from their Great Uncle Ford, it also came from their business. He was always serious about his work and serious about getting his son to take after him. Strict and smart for business, unlike their mother who stayed home most of the time talking with the other rich women in the community. Because of his seriousness, he was strict about everything.

“U-Uh yeah- It was great.”

“Did you do your homework?”

“Yes.”

“Was everything completed on time?”

“Yes.” They made eye contact. Dipper’s father maintained it for a moment before setting down his newspaper, “Son, your mother and I have been talking about letting you take over for me when I retire.”

Dipper choked on his cereal. “Wait- What?”

“Well son, I’m thinking about getting you trained and working for my business. You’ll be working along with Miss Pacifica and the Gleeful boy all hours of the day and you’ll finally be able to put that genius mind to work. We think it’d be a wonderful career opportunity for you.”

“Not only that.” Their mother chimed in. “But you’ll also get a chance to make friends like your sister here. Maybe even get a girlfriend and get settled.”

“Mom, Dad- What about college?”

“Darling, there’s no need to go to college now when you have a big career choice in your reach.”

“But Mom-”

“No buts Mason, its been decided.” He raised his voice a little, letting Dipper know not to argue back. It’s been decided. Dipper almost sulked in his chair.

There was silence at the table.

“Alright, it’s about time you two finish up and head on to school,” their mother quickly spoke up with a smile. Mabel got up kissed their mom on the cheek and smiled.

“Okay mom! Come on, Bro bro.”

With that, Dipper quickly got up from his seat and went up to his room to get his things for school. Mabel tried to chat with him as she drove him to his school, but he only made small noises to acknowledge her. When they got there, he picked up his bag and opened the door, but a hand on his arm stopped him.

“Dipper, you need to tell Mom and Dad that you don’t want to take over.”

“What other choice do I have? You know them. They’re not gonna let me do what I want to do. Besides, who would take over the company if I didn’t?”

“Well, I was thinking I would do it.”

Dipper turned to look at his sister, shocked. “I thought you were going to follow your dream. You know, go to college, get a degree in fashion with a minor in business, open your own boutique, all that jazz?”

“Maybe I could get a degree in business with a minor in fashion. It’s not like you’ve been paying a lot of attention to how Dad runs the company anyway. I have. I know how to do this.”

“Okay, but how would we convince them? You know Dad doesn’t think you’re strong enough to run a company. He’d never agree.”

Mabel grinned, “Simple. We’re going to show him that I can do this. Besides, if all else fails, you could just run away. They’d have no choice then.”

The elder laughed, but Dipper frowned. He pulled his arm away gently and grabbed his bag. “We’ll talk over it more tonight. See you later, Mabelgator.”

“In a while, Dippingdile,” Mabel replied, just like always. As soon as Dipper was on the walk, she pulled away. The other sighed as he walked towards the school. He was stopped by someone walking up next to him and putting a hand on his shoulder.

“Heya, Pinetree. Didya miss me?”

Dipper almost choked on air when he felt a hand on his shoulder. And looked back at the blonde behind him. He didn’t know whether to hug the fuck out of the boy right then and there or slap him upside the head.

“Bill-”

Bill pulled him close in a sort of sideways hug, “I missed you too, kiddo. So, whatcha doing?”

“I’m going to school. What are you doing here?”

“Picking you up. C’mon, come be a rebel with me.”

“But, I have to go to school.”

“No you don’t. I never finished high school and I’m good.”

“That’s not gonna convince me to skip school, Bill. In fact, that encourages me to go to school and pretend you don’t exist.”

“First off, rude. Second off, you’ll survive if you skip one day. Come on, Pinetree, let’s go.”

“No Bill, I’m not skipping school-” Bill pouted before grinning again and putting his arm around Dipper’s shoulders.

“C’mon, pinetree, it’ll be fun~! Plus, what’s the point of rules if nobody’s going to break them?” The blonde wriggled his eyebrows as Dipper rolled his eyes.

“Plus, a little birdie told me you had some joe and angie troubles yeah?” Dipper raised an eyebrow and stopped walking.

“What?” 

Bill chuckled, “Y’know, Joe and Angie! Joe mama angie daddy~!” Dipper groaned and started walking quickly again.

Bill jogged up and put his arm around the brunette once again, “Come on! You don’t hear that often pinetree~!”

“How did you even know that I had some trouble with my parents?”

Bill walked ahead of Dipper and turned around walking backwards with a wink.

“A magician never tells his secret~ However if you come with me maybe I can show you all of my cards~!”

Dipper looked at the school before sighing and nodding, “Let’s get out of here.”

Bill smirked and pulled him towards a beat-up Impala. The richer of the two couldn’t help wrinkling his nose at the thing. His disgust didn’t stop him from from getting in, though. The interior was much nicer than the exterior. It had red leather seats and a wood finish. A single coffee cup was resting in the cup holder. Dipper picked it up before Bill could say anything.

“You like Starbucks too? I thought it was too expensive for most Miseries.”

The other chuckled, “Keyword most. I freaking love Starbucks.”

Dipper was about to reply, but someone knocked on his window, scaring the shti out of him.

“What the actual fuck?”

Bill leaned over and rolled down the window, “Hey, Eyeball number 38. You’re excused from your duties for today. I’m taking the Richie out in town. Can you tell Pyronica to not mess with my stuff while I’m gone? If I come back and find my dildo on the ceiling again, I’m kicking her ass.”

“Wait wh-”

“Sure thing boss! Wait,” The small boy started to squint. “You do know you’re not allowed to have coffee, right boss? Remember the Christmas incident?”

“I make the rules and I do what I want. You stay quiet about it if you wanna keep your job.”

The kid’s eyes practically widened in fear. “S-Sorry b-boss! I-I’ll stay quiet, I swear!”

Dipper gave Bill a look as he rolled up the window. “Is that any way to treat your employees?”

“They still like me. Besides, I can’t fire him. His brothers would kick my ass. Those Eyeballs might be small and weak, but together, they’d be able to kill a hundred people each.”

“How many Eyeballs do you employ?”

“I think the number’s around forty. I know there’s a shit ton that Pyronica’s always babysitting and one of them is actually a thirty-year-old.”

“Woah really?”

“Yeah. It’s hilarious. Anyway, what do you wanna do on your day off? We can go see a movie or mess with some Richies.”

“I’d prefer to not mess with the other Richies.”

“Aw, come on, Pinetree! I thought you wanted to be rebellious.”

“I never said that. I said I’d leave school with you, but I never said I wanna fuck shit up.”

“Language, kid, geez!” Bill looked at his uniform. “Is that really what you wanna wear today? It looks uncomfortable.”

Dipper grabbed the edge of his vest, “I’ll have you know that my school’s uniform is top notch. But, yeah, the shirt is itchy. Can we go by my house?”

“Well, I mean you look like lil’ Gideon all stuffed in his suit and tie. I have some loose clothes at my place, why not play Misery today?”

The younger shook his head, “No way. I’m not going to dress like one of you. Miseries have no sense of fashion.”

Bill leaned back with a gasp, putting a hand on his chest in offense. “I’ll have you know Pinetree I have one of the best deadass fashion sense anyone could ever have in this town! I’m honestly hurt- no insulted- that you would say that!”

Dipper laughed, “Jesus, dramatic much? If you’re actually that good, I guess I’ll deal with it.”

“Yay~”

They quickly made the trip back to Bill’s place, kind of stuck in an awkward silence. I mean, there was something in the air that made Dipper feel a little giddy. But fuck if he knows.

“Okay so, my house is not in the best shape. It is a little messy in my room, oh and there’s peanut butter in the fridge because of Pyronica. Wash your hands after you eat em’ and don’t touch me. I’m highly allergic to them. They’re the devil. Other than that mi casa es su kasa.”

“Don’t worry. I kind of have a thing against peanuts because my sister got temporarily blinded by on in the fourth grade.”

“Really? You are literally my soul mate now. Okay, but is she still blind? Peanuts are from hell I told everyone this confirms it.”

“She can see just fine now. You were right, the devil shoves peanuts up his ass.”

“Hah, yeah.”

Bill pulled up to a house on a street full of tiny, identical houses. He got out and motioned for Dipper to do the same. “This is it.”

The Richie climbed out of the car, stopping to look at the house in disgust, “This is your house?”

“Yeah, it’s not much but it at least has a roof. In honesty, other miseries would kill to have a roof to live under. Only half of us actually live in homes or apartments. The rest, the streets. So for now. It’s the best I have to live in.”

“Oh… I guess it’s their fault for being Miseries.”

Bill gave Dipper a long look and frowned. “Dipper, it’s not our fault that we have no money. We can’t have big houses like you do. We can’t have good health like you do. We can’t live like kings unlike you and other Richies can. Every day is a fight for us while you and others sit in your fancy little houses living everyday without worrying about money, finding a clean house, getting a job, getting discriminated for how much of a shithole your life had become. This is real, Dipper. This is life.  Not candy land.”

Dipper looked at his feet. “I’m sorry. God, I hope you never meet my father.”

Bill’s shoulders relaxed a little as he walked over and put a hand on Dipper’s shoulder. “It’s fine, Pinetree. In honesty, I hope I do.”

“No, you don’t. He wants to kill all Miseries and nothing anyone says can change his mind.”

“I know I can’t change his mind. That’s life and it sucks. We’ll just have to suck it up. But I’m not afraid of a man who sits in his chair all day preaching nonsense.”

“You don’t understand. He’d actually do it if he found out about you.”

Bill stared for a moment before slowly grinning. “He doesn’t have to know me as a Misery~.”

“Bad idea.”

“I’m a master of portraying personas. I’ve acted as drug lords, dealers, you name it. I can nail a Richie, Pinetree.” He chirped.

“It’s still a bad idea. I mean, my father would ask about everything. There’s no way you’d be able to pull it off.”

“The best thing you can learn is that I am a master at personas, and psychology.” He booped the other’s nose. “I always plan ahead. I don’t jump in before I learn as much as I can about the person I’m fooling.”

“Bill, I really do like you as a person, but you need to listen to me when I say it’s a bad idea. I don’t care how good you are at pretending to be a Richie, my father will know. My sister is fine and you already know my Grunkles, but you cannot meet my father. Actually, my mother would probably tell him if she found out, so meeting her is probably a bad idea too. I’m sorry, but that’s the way it is.”

Dipper sighed and looked at his feet, “Sometimes, I wish I weren’t rich. I live a life of luxury, but that comes with all these rules and things I have to do, like hating Miseries and becoming part of my father’s company and never really having any friends.”

Bill’s eyes were wide, baffled when he heard Dipper’s small rant. “Well, since you don’t want me to that bad. And if it means that I could lose you as a friend in general, then I won’t. But life’s full of surprises, if they find out and kick you out or something. You can always stay here. Don’t let rules and labels rule your life pinetree. You’re a person too. In honesty you’re better than the other Richies I’ve met hah.” Bill patted Dipper on the shoulder.

“Some wouldn’t be this understanding. You’re different, Pinetree. Stay yourself. Don’t be somebody you don’t want to be just to look good in some idols eyes or your parents. Hell they’re stupid in honesty for putting rules down on you kid. You’re a good kid. We need more people in the community like you. Hell, we need more Richies like you.”

Bill clicked his tongue and strolled over to his front door, unlocking it as he swayed his hips.  

“Now do you wanna come inside and relax or do you want to stay out here and lay in life’s lemons all day. Let’s have some fun~” The blonde purred with a teasing grin.  

Dipper chuckled biting his lip. “Hah- yeah.”

Bill led his friend inside, taking note when Dipper’s eyes went to his ass. For someone who swore up and down that he was straight, he did some pretty gay things. The Misery decided then and there that he would be the one to pull this Richie out of the closet.

“Alright, make yourself at home. Shirts are in the top drawer first dresser to the right in my room. After that, make yourself comfortable~!” Bill chirped after closing the door behind him.

Dipper looked around the room, rubbing his arm. He swallowed when he saw the purple dildo hanging from the ceiling, wondering why the fuck it was up there. The teen quickly decided he didn’t want to know and went to the dresser. He changed into the nicest shirt he could find, deciding to keep his shoes on. They were quite sensible and he wouldn’t want to lose them.

There was a knock on the door. “You enjoying yourself in there Richie’? You’ve been in there for over an hour.”

Dipper huffed and opened the door, “I was looking for a nice shirt. You have maybe three that don’t have any holes in them. Seriously, I’m going to take you shopping one of these days and get you some nice shirts.”

Bill raised an eyebrow. “Well they’ll end up torn eventually.” He looked up, noticing the dildo. “Goddamn it, Pyronica.”  

“Pyronica was that lady that saved me the other day, right? She seemed really nice.”

“Yeah, she was. I was actually sending her out to fetch you. She can be nice, just don’t piss her off.”

“Good to know. Anyway, what did you have in mind for today? Or was the kidnapping an impromptu thing?”

Bill grinned. “Well, we could hang around here if you want. You ever smoked weed?”

“No. I’ve been looking for a decent dealer. Richies may hate Miseries, but they know that you guys have all the best weed.”

“Hah, wow you really are different from the other Richies’ I can tell you though you’re in luck. I have some with me and all in the back for trade. I can hit you up.”

He snorted. “Give your virgin mouth something new to taste.”

Dipper blushed, “Just give me some fucking weed.”