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toloveawarlord · 2 years

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Ch. 2

♥ Pairing: Hajime Kokonoi x Koharu Shiratori

♥ Rating: 18+ Sexual Content; Gang Violence/Activities

♥ Timeline: Bonten

♥ OC summary: Koharu Shiratori becomes Kokonoi’s wife in an exchange between her father and the Bonten Executive. The lawyer is thrust into a position of power within the criminal organization.

♥ wc: 1.6k

♥ a.n: Chapter 2 is complete! I am really loving her and Koko's dynamic.

"This dress suits you very well."

After a lengthy trip to his favorite clothing store and having a plethora of dresses brought for him to choose from, Koko settled on this: a wine-colored strapless dress that fit to her form exquisitely He slid his hand up her thigh, admiring how the shamefully high slit bared her soft skin. Koko wanted to show off his new wife to everyone.

"It would be advantageous to discuss what this business meeting will entail." Koharu wasn't disappointed with the choice of clothing. His tastes were sexy and sophisticated. But tonight, was about a business meeting, she needed to be as informed as possible.

"Still all business, I see. You can relax."

Crimson irises turned to him, slight irritation on her features. "I am relaxed."

God, she really was special. It had been years since he had anything make his blood pump. His colleagues entertained themselves nightly at their favorite, exclusive nightclub, where women and booze were readily available. Koko wasn't that interested, even if he went often. A man needed company. Now, his wife would provide new, thrilling stimulation.

Both mentally and physically.

"Hiroshi and Asuka Fukuda," Koko continued to caress her smooth thigh. She never pushed his hand away, which he took as a good sign. "They've been on our radar for a while but have refused to have a meeting. I can't go into the details on what we're after."

Understandable. It wasn't as though a marriage certificate made her a member of Bonten.

Koharu nodded her head, taking a moment to reassess. "Perhaps I should have asked what it is you want me to do in this meeting." As much as it pained her to be less informed, she had to accept her position. If he told her to simply sit there and look pretty, then she would.

"It's not ideal. I would have liked to have some time to prepare you, but the timing made that impossible." Koko would have also liked to do this alone, but the mention of his wife had gotten the meeting. He couldn't show up without her at his side. "Small talk will be important. I'm leaving it to you to lead on our relationship. I'm certain you understand how it can affect the deal. As for the business, I'll take care of everything."

The car rolled to a stop in front of the skyscraper. Elegant and exclusive, only limos and sleek sports cars were valeted around.

"Ah, yes. There is one more thing." Koko lifted her left hand, sliding on an exquisite ring. It wasn't large or gaudy, but the gold band and diamonds inlaid screamed expensive. "I do hope it's to your liking."

Koharu had never imagined herself with a wedding ring like other little girls. It glittered as the light hit it. A truly beautiful ring. Was she meant to say thank you? She wasn't well versed in flirting or being bashful, which had been a hindrance in her past relationships.

And he had a pretty, almost boyish smile on his face while he waited for her reply.

Koharu leaned forward, pressing her lips to his. She felt utterly ridiculous, heart pounding like a schoolgirl receiving her first kiss from the cutest boy in class. And she'd kissed plenty of times, but somehow, her movements were only awkward.

And she had the sudden urge to explain herself after the short kiss.

"We shouldn't kiss for the first time in front of them."

It surely wasn't the reaction he'd expected, but he didn't mind. This marked the first time she'd touched him, showing her willingness to be a wife, despite the circumstances. Koko traced his tongue over his lips, unsatisfied. "A little more practice, I think."

His arm snaked around her waist, but Koko was the one to slide closer, trapping the woman between himself and the door. He captured her lips, more fiercely than the chaste little kiss that she'd given him. It amused him that her reciprocation was much more confident than before.

Koharu was off balance, having to grip his arm in order to stay upright. His hold on her was gentlemanly, a stark contrast to the sinful way he commanded her lips.

Koko wasn't satisfied, but it was past time for them to be inside.

"You're going to need to fix your lipstick."

No one should be allowed to kiss like a god. Never once had Koharu ever had a kiss ebb through her whole body. She'd never met a man who could turn her own with only his lips. Koharu couldn't look in his direction, afraid he might see the way he'd affected her.

She needed to get her head together.

Both made themselves presentable before heading inside. The venue decorated extravagantly; money thrown around without a care to create another world within the large room. An exclusive part of the insanely rich and powerful. It should be surprising that some of these men and women were in the same room as many of the elites of the Tokyo underworld, but it wasn't.

"We were beginning to think you weren't going to show, Koko."

Koharu was greeted with a semi-circle of well-dressed men seemingly waiting for their arrival. She correctly assumed that they were the other executives of the infamous Bonten, a few of them having the tattoo visible on their body.

"You brought a thing this pretty with you? Not fair! You're going to share, right?" The pink haired man slid up beside her, no shame in his palm smacking against her ass and feeling her up so openly.

He must have expected her to blush and act shy, but ultimately let it happen. It was normal for men like them to do whatever they pleased. But Koharu was not that kind of girl.

She brushed his hand away, refraining from smacking at him and making a scene. "Do not put your hands on me again." Her gaze slid over the crowd, relieved that none were looking in their direction. It was possible they were too scared to actually make eye contact with any of these men.

The tension around her was palpable. All the other executives straightened, as if she'd struck them all. A typical reaction from powerful men.

"You should teach your bitch some manners, or we can do it for you." The one who spoke eyed her like a piece of meat. His violet eyes were narrowed, but his desire to lay his hands on her was clearly reflected in them.

He must be one of the Haitani brothers. Koharu wasn't well versed in the hierarchy of Bonten, but she grew up near Roppongi. Since there were two men with the same color of hair and eyes, it was safe to assume that they were the brothers she'd heard of.

"I can speak for myself, and unless your name appears on the marriage certificate, I suggest you keep your hands off me. It's bad for business to feel up someone's wife."

Stunned was an understatement. "Marriage?"

Koko decided he should step in before his new wife made the situation worse. What she said was true, but he also knew that her brash attitude would end up causing a scene. It would be bothersome if she pissed them off any further. "Yes. Koharu is now my wife, and therefore she belongs to me. That's that matters. The Fukuda's are here."

He escorted her away from them before any questions could be raised. "That was pretty brazen of you. I thought you were smarter than that." He would need to smooth over Rindou before the Haitani acted on his impulse to put her in her place.

"If the Fukuda's agreed to a meeting based on your marriage status, it stands to reason that if they witnessed your colleagues feeling me up, it could reflect poorly on you." Of course, Koharu hardly wanted them to be touching her regardless, but image was everything.

"As correct as you are, it was reckless. I expect you to be more respectful to them next time, even if you have to fake it." Koko couldn't argue with her logic. He imagined he'd have to put out plenty of fires over the course of the next few weeks. "Wife or not, if they take concerns to Mikey, I can't protect you from the commander's orders."

Mikey. She recognized the name but knew little about him.

Koharu slipped her hand into his as they approached the table. Many questions swirled around in her head, but she needed to focus on the task in front of her. Red stained lips pulled up in a tender smile as she bowed to the Fukuda's as Koko greeted them.

Drinks were ordered, and the introductions were made. Koharu chimed in, when necessary, but her gaze continuously flickered to Koko, mostly in an attempt to appear hopelessly in love. If talks of business had begun, she wasn't aware. Mr. Fukuda was a lovely, older gentleman who could likely talk one's ear off.

It was Mrs. Fukuda who put Koharu on edge. She spoke only to Koko, even when a question was directed to Koharu. It was as though she didn't exist. A problem that she hadn't been expecting to have to remedy.

It was clear that the conversation was turning sour. Indicated by the way Koko squeezed her hand under the table without looking in her direction.

This was the reason Koharu disliked being uninformed. A pressure to fix this swiftly had been thrown upon her with little time to come to any clear conclusion as to why Mrs. Fukuda was acting ill towards her.

At least, pressure was something that Koharu was used to. An opportunity would present itself if she paid close attention. Then, it would only be a matter of striking with poise and grace.

#tokyo revengers #tokyo rev #tokyo revengers smut #tokyo revengers oc #hajime kokonoi #tokyo revengers kokonoi #tokyo revengers koko #tokyo rev oc #koharu shiratori #bonten timeline

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guqin-and-flute · 4 years

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In Your Hands--Ch. 2 [Peony to Lotus!Verse]

[Chapter 1]

[This whole fic is the second chronological installment of the Peony to Lotus!Verse]

[First Installment] [Ao3 Series]

Yanli is determined to set about evening the exchange of their gifts after she finds a little chest full of her favorite floral incense on his pillow next to her when she wakes. She would like to collect information as he does, sifting through conversation to remember errant tidbits about interests but he is as frustratingly tightlipped on the subject of himself as he ever is. Agreeable to any attempt to draw out his preferences to the point of obfuscation. “Don’t you love this color, A-Yao?” elicits a kindly, “It’s very lovely,” no matter the color in question. She thinks it might be his way of not being a bother, because he certainly isn’t doing anything intentionally. Little does he know that, in reality, it’s making things more difficult on her.

I will know you, she thinks, watching him with keen eyes as they all eat breakfast together and talk. I will give you what you want, if only I could find out what that is.

He catches her watching and tilts his head, smiling in question.

“How are your dumplings?” She asks as an excuse, gesturing.

“Oh, very good. Would you like some more?”

This man.

His plate holds a bit of everything on the table, including one of A-Xian’s favored spicy dishes--while it’s something, she already knows he had grown up in Yunmeng and can tolerate spice. She just doesn’t know whether he likes it or not.

It has almost become a game, to her, if not to him--though she thinks it might be, at least a little, for she sees the flash of satisfaction in his eyes when he lets her take his arm and breathes deeply, taking in the scent of the incense she had let envelop her as she dressed that morning. “You smell wonderful,” he murmurs and she feels herself flush up her neck, even though it had been the whole point of steeping herself in it to begin with.

“Thanks to you.” When she lays her head on his shoulder--partially in thanks, partially to hide her pink cheeks--she feels him lean closer.

She wants to delight him, to see him pleased and surprised into a genuine smile. But more than anything, she truly wants to know more about him.

There is an inkling of a clue when she buys a guan for him made of graceful silver arches that form a lotus that seems to sit upon water that is reminiscent of the hair pin he had gotten her. When she presents it to him at bedtime, he seems surprised. He lets loose a soft, “oh,” turning it this way and that in his hands. Watching him, triumphant, she slides out her own pin and twirls it next to the guan, allowing her hair to begin its tumble down. “We’ll match.”

For a moment, he simply looks between the two ornaments, one hand coming out to slide his fingertips down the beaded chain of hers. Then, he smiles at her, and it’s wide and very nearly new. “We will.”

“You like it?”

“Of course, it’s beautiful! I will like everything that you choose to give me.”

She scrunches her nose and tweaks his cheek. “Well, that’s hardly fair! How will I know if you truly do and aren’t just pretending for my sake?”

Turning, he picks her hand up from the bed and chastely brushes his lips across her knuckles. “I will like them because you are the one who gave them, A-Li.”

And at long last, it’s something! Because she thinks it’s true. Perhaps, for him, like it is for her, it is not the usefulness, or the beauty of the thing, but the loving it was given from. She has kept the little drawings A-Xian has given her since he was young, the little carved creatures of wood and soap that A-Cheng used to whittle her (though, realistically, they are little more than blobs she was told are bears and the like. Whatever they look like, they are blobs of love.) She has them lined up on a shelf in her old room, and has brought a few over to the room shared by A-Yao. They make her smile to see because they were made for her; love in a little scene she can revisit through touch again and again. Sometimes, she simply holds them and remembers how it used to be.

This, she decides, is probably what she should focus on for A-Yao--a shelf of happy memories and the knowledge he is loved.

So, when she is sitting in her favorite pavilion one bright and breezy morning and He Si, one of the servants, delivers a gorgeous new calligraphy set to her and informs her with a barely contained grin that her husband has sent it, Yanli sets to work. After she unpacks and marvels over shiny new things, of course. It’s all sleek and beautiful and of the highest quality.

All morning, she uses his new gift to write him notes that she spends the afternoon ferreting away into places he will find them--like in his pockets or his desk drawers or under his spare boots. Some of them are little lines of poems she cherishes, one or two are shy sketches of the butterflies that had visited and twined through the fluttering, gauzy green curtains as she wrote, and more, still, are idle little thoughts she thinks will warm him. ‘I will be pleased to see you at dinner.’ ‘Remember not to work too hard.’ ‘Have a good day.’

She even gets the joy of seeing him find one while on a walkway, tucked in between 2 delivered missives with the help of He Si’s sleight of hand. The brisk, dutiful stride to business pauses and Yanli watches his slightly bowed head as he reads, the sunlight sliding down his hair like silk. When he looks up and around, she slips behind a delicately carved pillar on impulse so that he can’t see her. Then, she peeks back around. He’s looking back down at the slip of paper in his hand, his mouth a small curl of aching fondness. This one had said, ‘thinking of you.’ Warmth spreads through her when he folds it, neatly and carefully, into his fingers and presses his knuckles to his lips, closing his eyes. It is a moment of him with no mask in sight and she would feel sheepish for intruding if it didn’t bring her such happiness just to see his own. Even after he resumes his purposeful stride and disappears indoors, she is grinning, glowing, and allows herself a moment to seek out He Si to review the heist. “Did it please him?” the girl demands, excited. “What did it say?”

“It’s a secret,” Yanli teases. “And oh yes it did.”

It continues in this manner almost daily, when his gifts allow it; he gives her a parasol and she invites him on a walk under it with her; he buys rich embroidery thread and she weaves a delicate braid for him to wear or display a pendant from. He presents her with a fine silken handkerchief that she returns only days later, embroidered and thoroughly infused with the incense he had given her, draped over his pillow. Sadly, she didn’t get to witness this discovery, but she does see him slip it from his inner pocket as he removes his outer robes, that evening. As she watches him from the bed, Yanli resists the most absurd urge to bashfully pull the covers up over her nose and asks, “You...found it, then?”

Instead of answering, he slowly sits on her side instead of his and spreads it between them on the covers with deliberate care, one side of his mouth tucked up, that dimple pressed in sweetly in the lantern-light. “A pair of mandarin ducks,” he observes, voice quiet, eyes on the handkerchief as he runs his fingertips over it.

“I stitched them myself.”

“They are masterfully done and the colors are beautiful.”

“It was the thread you gave me. I wanted....” The intentions, the symbolism gets caught on her tongue and she blushes. Husband, she has to remind herself. It’s allowed! It’s expected! A long and happy marriage is what one is supposed to want. He makes the prospect of closeness and affection all at once so mysterious and alluring, almost a forbidden thing (though the thought is a ridiculous one, she admits.) “Do you like it?”

He raises his eyes to her and they are night soft. “A-Li, may I kiss you?”

Yanli’s heart jumps to her throat in an anticipatory sort of apprehension and her hands twist in her lap. Anxious without fear; she trusts this and him. “You may.”

Though she had kissed his mouth once before, he had been still, accepting the simple press and nothing more. Now, as he leans in, his hands settle lightly on her jaw, tilting her face up to him, his lips are a sure, gentle slide over hers. It’s odd to have someone so close to her face, and it’s warmer than she would have thought--not to mention wetter. But not bad.

Oh no, definitely not bad.

A-Yao kisses her with the same keen attention he gives everything else; controlled and intent. It feels as if he is slowly sampling her, sometimes the pressure feather-like and almost tickling, and other times an earnest press, inviting her along. The entirety of her skin grows hot at the realization she is being experienced and she can feel her heartbeat as if her entire chest is a drum. He makes it easy, a song that sounds vaguely familiar without completely knowing the next step. She doesn’t feel lost or stupid or silly. She feels wanted. Precious.

When he draws back, her lips are tingling--who would have thought such an ordinary part of her face could produce that much sensation? One would think she would have noticed this before!--and he is watching her carefully. His own lips are slightly pinker and without thinking, she reaches out to touch them, wonderingly. His watchfulness melts at her touch and he smiles against her fingertips--his mouth is warm, like her own when she lifts her other hand to compare.

“That was….”

“Good?”

“Oh, it was strange but I think I liked it. I--can we try again?”

A-Yao laughs and reaches out as she eagerly shuffles forward on her knees. Yanli allows him to draw her onto his lap sideways but, this time, she reaches out and draws him down. And being the good, patient man that he is, he lets her try again and again as she wishes, moving as she does.

There is no sudden revelation or awakening as she had secretly hoped there might be with such a kiss, (how easy that would have been, if all the whispers and stories and songs had all aligned with ultimate clarity and understanding within her, if it was all at once as easy as everyone else made it seem). But it is new and oddly pleasant to simply be in his arms, closer than she has ever been before, sharing with him. He pulls away and takes her wrist, eyebrows pinched. “You’re shaking. Are you alright?”

Oh. It seems she is. It isn’t fear, but instead a sort of deep trembling that seems to originate from her core, almost like excitement or the kind of giddy terror of a friend chasing you in a game of tag. She smiles up at him. “It’s...new. I think I’m just getting used to it. You’re my first kiss.”

Something she can’t define as positive or negative before it’s gone passes over his face and he gathers her up, burying his face in her neck, squeezing. She curls back around him, hands stroking his soft hair. “I’m so glad it’s you,” she murmurs, the ghosts of the kisses still shimmering on her lips. “You’re so sweet and kind to me. How did I get so lucky?”

Against her throat, he sucks in a deep, shaking breath before pulling back to deliver an almost perfect smile, the slight tremble in the corner of his mouth the only thing betraying whatever depth of emotion he is feeling. “Jiang-furen,” he says with playful reproach. “You simply can’t steal my lines like that. What will I be left with?”

In response, she clasps his face and leans up to rub the tips of their noses together. "Oh, you're so very clever. I'm sure you'll think of something."

#peony to lotus #yaoli #UPDATE CORNER HELL YEAH #This one is much less angsty than the first chapter (and that's saying something) but in planning...this has grown a proto plot #(I mean we have 2 maladjusted people pleasers trying to make each other happy there's bound to be a few bumps in the road)#So there's going to be a bit of sadness and a dash of angst in the future but I'm going to keep with the theme #This is primarily just going to be me giving them nice things because I can #And there isn't going to be any dumb and avoidable misunderstandings #There's going to be at LEAST 1 more chapter. Maybe 2. We'll see how much they wanna be all gushy and shit #my stuff #my fic

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terreisa · 4 years

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Love Down the Line: Chapter 11

The last thing Indie musician Emma Swan needs is a gigantic wrench thrown in the workings of her biggest tour to date weeks before its launch. When her backing guitarist that caused the problem says she has the perfect solution Emma is skeptical but left with little choice but to accept. Unfortunately she isn’t really prepared for said solution to be former Rock Star and leading man of Emma’s teenage fantasies, Killian Jones. With no other options and a month of performing across the country ahead of her Emma just hopes she doesn’t come to regret letting Killian onto her stage and into her life.

Ch 1, Ch 2, Ch 3, Ch 4, Ch 5, Ch 6, Ch 7, Ch 8, Ch 9, Ch 10, AO3

~*CS*~

Vancouver, May 30th

Emma stared out at the large, empty space in front of her feeling exhausted and exhilarated. She was sitting with her feet dangling off the edge of the stage, her heels drumming against the wall without any discernible rhythm. Her hair was still damp with sweat from the show and her arms ached from the intensity that she’d played but she didn’t care. Even the roadies working around her barely paid her any attention, they all knew she was merely basking in the moment.

Her tour was officially done. Seventeen cities in a month and every one of them had been amazing but there was always something extra special about the final show. It was as though everything and everyone had come together to create a perfect moment in time that they capitalized on to give the best show possible. Her playing had been spectacular, the others had been just as great, better even, and the audience had loved every second, sang every lyric, cheered their hearts out. They’d ended up doing two encores.

As her gaze swept across the thousands of empty seats she let out a contented hum. They had sold every ticket for every show and each venue had been just as big. It boggled her mind that every person that filled those seats did so because they loved her music, connected with her lyrics, and appreciated what she was trying to communicate through her art. She only wished she could have personally thanked each and every one of them for it.

The bustle behind her continued on as she soaked it all in. She took no notice of the footsteps approaching her until a pair of familiar, well worn boots stopped beside her. Looking up at Will with a smile she patted the stage next to her. Lowering himself next to her she noticed that he’d taken a shower, the smell of his body wash still strong. With a pang she realized that Killian had used the same brand.

“‘Nother one in the books, eh?” Will grinned, knocking her shoulder with his.

“Yeah,” she sighed happily, “Tonight was really great.”

He chuckled, shaking his head, “Clearly. You haven’t done two encores in ages. Then again, you haven’t been too keen on doin’ the planned one lately.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” She asked, frowning as she adjusted herself so she was facing him.

“Well-” he leaned back and gave her an unimpressed look, “Ever since LA and the shit with Killian you’ve been phonin’ it in a bit. Tonight was the first show you actually looked like you were havin’ fun.”

“I haven’t been phoning it in!” She protested a little too loudly, some of the crew behind her stopped to look over at them. Blushing she gave them a wan smile before glaring at Will, “I played my heart out at every show, asshole.”

“Not possible,” Will negated, his grin unfurled again, “You left that thing back in LA.”

She felt a pang of longing and regret again, even as she scrunched up her face in distaste, “That was really cheesy and absolutely not true.”

“Oy, you’ve put cheesier lines in your songs,” he accused. “Besides, I’m just the purveyor of truth in these troubled times. Admit it, you’ve not been givin’ it your all. Especially in Oakland. That was a rough one.”

She opened her mouth to refute and couldn’t. Will was absolutely right and she kind of hated him for it. Oakland had been more than rough, it had almost been a disaster. It had taken an intense pep-talk from Ruby and Tink combined to just get her to the venue. She’d been able to put on a convincing enough show but the second she’d stepped backstage between the main set and the encore she’d nearly had a complete breakdown. More than once during the show she had looked over expecting to see Killian grinning back at her and found Ruby instead. Every little thing she’d pushed aside had hit her as she’d moved offstage and it had taken everything she’d had to get back out on stage to finish the show.

“Yeah, well... Why didn’t anyone say anything?” She asked accusingly. “Regina didn’t even bring it up and you know she loves to find something to critique.”

“Eh, the shows haven’t been complete shite,” he said with a shrug. “No one’s posted a rant or got a new hashtag trendin’ and you know I’d tell you ‘bout those.”

She snorted, “I don’t know why you’re so fixated on social media. Hasn’t Belle broken you of that habit yet?”

“Ah, but she loves me for all my charmin’ qualities,” he said with a wink. “I’ve her almost convinced to join Instagram. Told her other nerds’ll love to see her books and all those plants her dad’s given her. They like seeing all those uninspired posts you do of your piano after all.”

“It’s the only thing I’m comfortable sharing,” she mumbled.

Will stared at her for a moment before nodding and looking out at the empty seats. She waited for him to finally say what he’d stayed behind to say instead of going back to the hotel with Belle. He loved to tease and stir up trouble but she knew that when he got serious that it meant something. There was no way he’d waited until nearly everyone else had left just so he could not so gently criticize the last few shows.

Instead of saying anything he began humming. Emma rolled her eyes and focused on watching the last of the equipment being packed up and cleared off the stage. It wasn’t until Will began singing under his breath that she recognized the song.

“Backstreet Boys? Really?” She asked with a raised brow.

“Show me the meaning of being lonely,” he said instead of singing, “So many words for a broken heart. Right, luv?”

She recoiled, “My heart’s not broken.”

“Could have fooled me and everyone else ‘round here. Even Belle noticed somethin’s off with you.”

“She did?”

Instead of answering Will looked back out over the empty seats, leaning back on his hands as he did so. He continued to recite the lyrics of the song, as though it was a masterpiece in verse instead of a late nineties pop song written with the sole purpose of being a hit. She watched, impressed and amused by his unabashed performance, spoken in a voice that carried to an audience of one.

Just as she was about to press him about what it was about her, that definitely wasn’t a broken heart, that Belle had noticed he fell silent. His mouth quirked up at the corner as he tilted his head to look at her.

“Have I ever told you how I met Belle?” He asked, his gaze soft.

She blinked, “Uh, no?”

“Broke into her shop,” he said proudly, the other side of his mouth ticking up into a boyish smile.

“You broke into her shop?” She asked slowly, not quite believing him.

“I was quite pissed at the time. That’d be drunk to you, you bloody yank,” he teased and she rolled her eyes, “Had the bright idea that a certain book was all I needed to set things to right.”

“You broke into her shop,” she repeated, “to steal a book?”

“Never said I was stealin’ anythin’,” he said with mock innocence. “I’m not sure I like what you’re implyin’.”

She huffed, “Fine, you broke into her shop to not steal a book. Did you meet her when she knocked you out before she called the cops?”

“Not exactly. You know those squishy little settees she’s got round the children’s nook?”

“You mean the beanbags? Yeah,” she said nodding.

“Well, I tuckered meself out picking the lock, findin’ that bloody book, and drinking far too much whisky. Decided to take a little nap before movin’ along,” he said with a nonchalant shrug.

“So you passed out and Belle found you in the morning?” She surmised.

“The cops found me first, not fifteen minutes after I’d set off a silent alarm. Belle was livin’ above the shop then. She had no idea anythin’ was amiss until after they’d cuffed me and had her come down so they could explain what’d happened-” he ducked his head at that. When he continued his voice was fond, “The constables were telling her what I could be charged with and she just kept lookin’ at my sorry ass. Drunk as all hell and mouthin’ off, as I’m wont to do. When they finished their little spiel she calmly told them that I was a friend and she’d forgotten that she’d offered me her couch to sleep on. Mind you, I’d never even stepped foot in her store before that night.

“Well the officers didn’t take too kindly to that. Blustered and threatened but she never backed down. I was at least sober enough to go along with her tales, who was I to ruin a perfectly good lie on my behalf? Finally, they removed the cuffs and took their leave, not without dire warnings and some more threats. As soon as the door closed behind them Belle invited me up for tea.”

“And you fell in love. Cute,” Emma tried not to sound bitter but failed completely.

“Nah,” he said with a click of his tongue, “That took a while yet.”

“Okay… so why are you telling me this?”

Will eyed her, “You’re askin’ the wrong question, luv.”

She frowned. There were a dozen questions she could have asked, least of all why Belle put up with him. He watched her patiently which only pissed her off.

“I give up,” she said, throwing her hands up in exasperation. “You’re obviously trying to tell me something so just spit it out.”

“You should have asked why I thought I needed a book that bad in the first place,” he stated, as though it were obvious.

“Fine then, why?”

“To broaden my horizons, of course,” he said cheekily with a wide grin. When she glared at him he grew serious, “Books always have the answer, yeah? Thought I’d find a way to win back my ex in one of them.”

There was only one ex Will could have been talking about and she’d done a number on him. The poems he’d written about her were terrible but the broken heart he’d suffered and lashing out he did was worse. She was still surprised he hadn’t ended up in jail from the stories he’d told her over the years.

“Ana.”

He nodded solemnly, “This was about a year after she’d ended things. I’d already started playing with you lot but I was still hurtin’. Probably didn’t help that we rehearsed across from her new husband’s office. Used to see her stoppin’ by to see him every few weeks. Couldn’t escape her, even if I wanted to.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” She asked softly.

“Why didn’t you tell us about what happened with Jones?” He shot back, though not unkindly. Shrugging he pushed himself forward and set his elbows on his thighs, his hands dangling between his legs, “Self preservation mostly and, yeah, a bit of enjoyin’ the wallowin’. Then Belle invited me for a cuppa instead of pressin’ charges. She’d seen my blusterin’ for what it was because she’d had a bit of a rough go of it herself. A couple of abusive exes will do that to ya.”

She nodded. Belle hadn’t told her much about her romantic history but what she’d told Emma was enough.

“Anyway we drank the tea, I sobered up, apologized, and that was it. I went on my way expecting nothing to come of it but another tale to spin for people over a pint-” the soft look returned, “Then a week later I ended up back at the shop. When it was open of course. Looked around a bit, chatted with her and then left. Kept doin’ that a couple times a week for a month or so before I realized I was stoppin’ by every time I’d seen Ana visitin’ her husband. Stayed away for two weeks after that. Belle took it all in stride, of course, welcomed me back with another cuppa and a book of poems.”

Emma smiled, knowing exactly when that was. He’d suddenly stopped writing his own poems and started reading them instead. She’d noticed that he’d seemed more settled, less angry, and she’d written a song about it. Will had demanded a writer’s credit as a result.

“That’s when I realized I was fallin’ for her. Thing was, I had always believed I’d love Ana forever, even if it meant I spend the rest of my days pinin’ after her like a lovesick fool. Had a real close look at what I was doin’ with my life. Only stayed away a week that time and asked Belle out to dinner before the door to her shop had closed behind me when I went back. She said no.”

“She said no?” Emma gasped, having fully expected a cutesy story of their first date to follow.

Will’s smile was enigmatic, “You see while I was having my little crisis of faith Belle was havin’ one of her own. All she knew about me was I was a terrible thief who played in a band and had an affinity for poetry. That was enough for any woman to be wary of trusting me and with the number both of her exes did on her she had no trust left to give. She wanted to say yes but couldn’t bring herself to put everything on the line if there was even the smallest chance of it shattering beneath her.”

She shifted uncomfortably, dropping her gaze to her hands that were perched in her lap. Unless Ruby or Regina had blabbed no one else knew exactly what had happened with Killian. All she’d told Will and Tink was that things hadn’t worked out, end of story. They hadn’t pushed for more of an explanation and she’d thought that was that. Clearly she was wrong.

“Does Belle know you’re telling me all this really personal information about her?” She asked accusingly, unable to keep herself from lashing out before he prodded a really vulnerable spot.

“Like I said, luv, she noticed there was somethin’ off with you-” he pointed a finger at her, “and before you go accusin’ me of blabbin’ about you to her I haven’t said a word. I can be a wanker but I do know how to respect a person’s privacy.”

“Why didn’t she say something?”

He sighed, “You two are friendly but you’re not exactly the sharin’ type are ya? She didn’t feel it was her place to butt into your life.”

“Oh, but it’s yours?” She asked harshly.

“We’re a horse of a different color, you and I,” he said with a conspiratorial air, “Seein’ as our love of music unites us.”

She smacked him in the arm and he gave her a wink in return. He wasn’t wrong. When they first met they got along like oil and water but she’d needed a drummer and he genuinely liked her songs. It had taken a slew of dive bars and a cramped van to tolerate each other and a little over a year before he was one of the few people she considered a tried and true friend.

“She could have talked to me,” she said petulantly.

“And she still might if this-” he waved his hand between them, “here doesn’t take. But I haven’t finished my story yet.”

“Sorry,” she said, feeling anything but, “continue.”

“Where was I?” He asked cheekily, chuckling at her glare. “Right, I’d decided to woo Belle and she’d wisely decided to protect her heart. Let me down gently, of course, my Belle.

“I was a bit disappointed but I also knew why she’d said no. Stopped goin’ round the shop, thought it’d be best to take a step back. She didn’t need me hangin’ around makin’ things awkward. Surprised the hell out of me when a month later she showed up at one of our gigs and asked me to dinner as soon as the set was done. She said that no one had actually listened to her or respected her decisions before, especially her exes, and that even if she didn’t know much about me she was willin’ to give me a chance. Celebrated three years back in March.”

“I know, you posted it all over Instagram,” she said with only a hint of the frustration she was feeling, “Is that it?”

“Almost,” he said with a chuckle, “Long story short-”

“Too late,” she muttered.

“Belle knew somethin’ was off with you ‘cause she’s been there before and she wanted me to tell you ‘cause she thought I could get you to see what’s in front of your face-” he said with a touch of impatience. “If you broke things off with Jones because he was bloody awful or your personalities didn’t mesh or whatever that’s one thing. If you did it because you’re scared then that’s somethin’ else. Okay, now I’m done.”

Emma sat, stunned, as Will stood up and stretched. He gave the few crew members still clearing the stage a genial wave before offering her his hand. With a scowl and some reluctance she grabbed it and let him haul her up beside him. She gave him a wary look, girding herself against more pointed jabs at her emotional expense, but he just spun on his heel and started walking off stage.

“That’s it?!” She called after him, a bit disgruntled.

“I said my piece, luv,” he parried back without turning around. “Besides I’ve my lady love waitin’ for me back at the hotel. She’s a rare one but I don’t think she’d be too forgivin’ if I spent the whole night with another woman. Even if it’s you.”

She rushed after him, “You’re not going to try to convince me to call him or… or tell me about how much of a great guy he is or something?”

“I ain’t gonna tell you what to do, luv. You’re the one that has to decide if you want to keep bein’ miserable or not-” he pulled his phone from his pocket, “I’m orderin’ a Lyft, you wanna ride with?”

“I’ve got a car waiting,” she said absently, still trying to figure out his game.

“Excellent, you got anythin’ you need to grab?” He asked without looking up, tapping away at his phone, “I can wait.”

“No, Ruby grabbed it all for me-” she grabbed his elbow and swung him around to face her, “You’re really not going to say anything else?”

He sighed, “You’ll do what you want and if you actually listened to what I’ve told you then you know there’s nothin’ else I could say. Now, do you want to stay here until we’re kicked out?”

She looked back across the stage but the magic of the moment was gone. Now it was just a big empty space with the last of the equipment being rolled out through the wings by the sweaty road crew.

“Fine, let’s go.”

The ride to the hotel was quiet. Will had clearly said everything he’d wanted to, spending the whole ride furiously texting someone. For her part she was too pissed off at him while trying desperately not to think too much about what little lesson he’d been trying to get her to understand to say anything remotely close to nice. When they reached the hotel he stopped her from leaving the car with a hand on her arm.

“One last thing-”

“Really?!” She snapped. “I just want to go up to my room, drink the champagne that I know the label sent, and not think about the emotional vomit you dropped in my lap tonight.”

“It needed to be said,” he stated without a hint of remorse. Then he squeezed her arm gently and sighed, “Look, I’m gonna send you somethin’ and you need to promise me you’ll look at that first.”

“First?” She asked warily, pulling her phone out of her back pocket. She’d never taken it off silent and saw that there were way more texts and calls than she’d expected to be there, “What is it?”

“Nothin’ too terrible,” he hedged.

His gaze darted over her shoulder. When she looked she saw a few paparazzi waiting by flanking the front doors of the hotel. She turned back to him and saw his jaw ticking.

“Will-”

He ignored her and leaned towards the driver, “Hey, mate, mind pullin’ round the back so we don’t get ambushed?”

“Of course, sir,” the driver said with a nod, immediately pulling away from the curb.

“Will,” she put every ounce of frustration she could into his name.

“You’ll thank me later,” he said absently, back to tapping madly on his phone, “And you know what, don’t look at it until you’re in your room. Can you do that?”

Just as she was about to grab the hand that was on her arm and twist it until bones cracked the car stopped again. Looking outside she saw they were at some kind of loading dock and one of the doors was propped open.

“Brilliant,” Will said happily. He let go of her and fished in his pocket, pulling out a couple of bills that he handed to the driver, “Cheers, mate!”

“Thank you, sir,” the driver said with a nod. He caught her gaze in the rear view mirror, “Ma’am.”

“Thanks,” she said weakly. Will was already out of the car and she scrambled out after him, “Wait, you can’t be all cryptic and then just leave me like that. What the hell is going on?”

“I know you want to punch me in the face-” he squinted his eyes at her, “Nope, you’re ready to murder me on the spot. Just trust me, luv. Besides, it wouldn’t do to make a scene out here and bring ‘round those vultures we made a point of avoiding.”

“Fine,” she huffed, pushing past him. “But you’re so on my shit list right now.”

“I’m always on it, luv,” he said with a laugh.

The hotel was five star but the door that had been left open led to a not so pretty hallway. She’d worked plenty of shitty jobs to know what a service corridor looked like. There were several stacks of empty milk crates and egg cages lining the walls and from the delicious smells wafting towards her it wasn’t hard to figure out that they were near the kitchens. She turned back and gave Will an unimpressed look.

“It was this or the paps,” he said unapologetically. He pointed ahead of them, “That way and then the second right will get you to the lobby.”

“And where are you going?” She asked suspiciously.

“Got a mate that’s holdin’ a bottle of champagne for me that way-” he hitched his thumb to the left. “I’ll let him know you said thanks for sneakin’ you past those vultures.”

He strolled past her, with his hands in his pockets, whistling the damn Backstreet Boys song he’d been singing earlier. She was torn between wanting to strangle him or begrudgingly thank him. In the end she settled for glaring at his back and muttering obscenities until he turned a corner and disappeared from her sight.

Twenty minutes later she was finally holed up in her room, freshly showered and wrapped in one of the hotel’s fluffy robes with the bottle of champagne in her hand. All should have been well except for the litany of messages she had. Will’s wasn’t the most recent and she would have ignored it if he hadn’t said anything but she had a feeling that whatever he had sent her was the reason behind all the other texts and calls. Her thumb hovered over his message, calculating how much it was going to ruin her night if she ignored it, before she scoffed at herself and tapped on it.

Scarlet: whatever you do don’t kill the messenger ie me

There was a second message, which was a link to YouTube. She hesitated again, even more so with his ominous message. When she tapped on the link she felt a momentary flash of panic, nearly closing out the app, because she knew without a doubt that watching the video was going to destroy any semblance of finishing off the night on a high note.

Her panic quickly turned into longing and heartbreak at the sight of Killian on her phone screen. He was sitting with his guitar in a room she’d never seen before but knew without a doubt was from his place in Boston. If pressed she wouldn’t have been able to explain how she knew but from the small bits of decor she could make out in the background and his sense of ease in the space were big clues. Her attention was drawn back to him as he cleared his throat and addressed the camera.

“Er, hello all,” he began sheepishly, his fingers nervously scratching behind his ear as the tips of his ears turned pink. His hair was in disarray and there were slight shadows under his eyes but he looked good, she would have even said great if there had been anyone around to ask her. He gave a rueful smile, “I’ve never done one of these, honestly never thought I would seeing as I seemed to have missed the metaphorical boat with this whole video blogging thing-”

Emma snorted in amusement despite herself and muttered, “It’s like he’s three hundred not thirty-three.”

“Aye, I may be belying my age but as you can see I’ve retained my youthful glow,” he said with a cheeky grin, his blue eyes sparkling with mirth.

The quip seemed to bolster him, the tension in his shoulders disappeared and he seemed to breathe easier, but it only lasted for a moment. His smile faded and he dropped his chin, his chest expanding as he took a deep breath. When he looked back to the camera the look in his eyes made her own breath catch in her throat.

“As many of my fans-” he paused and then gave a mirthless laugh, shaking his head, “Well, let’s be honest, a lot more than just my fans know my story. My exploits, my tragedies, missteps and extended stays in rehab are just cannon fodder for the gossip mongers that dwell on the internet. All of that led to my taking a much needed step back from the spotlight that’s lasted a good while. In that time I’ve continued to play, the creative soul in me would never stand for me not to, but I never thought I’d put pen to paper with the intention of writing a song ever again.

“The accident, yes that fucking accident, took more from me than just my brother and my love that night. It took the part of me that knew the right words to tease the desired emotion from an audience, how to hook them with a few notes and reel them in with lyrics that sprung from my heart and soul. Without that-” his voice cracked and he paused again, closing his eyes. After a few deep breaths he opened them, looking straight into the camera, his pain bare to see, “Without that it’s a wonder I didn’t drink myself to death within six months.”

Her phone screen went blurry and it wasn’t until a drop of water fell onto her hand that she realized she was crying. Impatiently brushing away the tears she focused back on the video.

He had begun idly picking at the strings of the guitar, “Getting sober was the first step to getting my life back. One of many. It’s been a hard road and every day is a struggle in one way or another but it’s a battle I’m willing to fight. My life, quite literally, depends on it. Next was getting serious about playing music again. I’ve spent the past few years not doing much more than recording backing tracks for what seems like every artist under the sun. I was in a rut and my agent convinced me that it was a sign that it was time to return to the recording booth. This time as the headliner, as it were. With no true argument against it I agreed, thinking that if anything I would enjoy a middling solo career out of it. What I hadn’t counted on was it leading to something that would turn my middling life upside down in the most unexpected of ways.

“You see, I had thought that I would be hoisted off on a producer and bundled to a cabin to write as many songs as possible before being shepherded back to a recording booth. Handled but not inspired. Before that could happen, though, another much more appealing opportunity presented itself.. A friend called needing a favor. One that my agent and the label approved of, though I would have done it regardless”

His finger picking continued as a wistful smile played at his lips. She couldn’t figure out what he was playing. It seemed somewhat familiar but his playing was too slow for her to catch the tune.

“In doing this favor I met someone-” he focused on the camera and gave a slight shake of his head, “You know, I never thought I’d be capable of letting go of my first love, of my Milah... to believe that I could find someone else... until I met her.”

Emma nearly dropped her phone in shock.

“For the first time since I thought I’d lost everything I felt like there was a possibility for me to find it all again. I found myself wanting- no, needing, to write again. I think I filled the first notebook within a week. She inspired me in a way I hadn’t been before. Then, I was privileged enough to become a part of her life.

“Unfortunately even before we met I had decided that there was no need to share with her what was to be a fairly big change in my life. I figured, why tell her about making a return to music when I hadn’t truly wanted it to happen in the first place?” he scoffed. He stopped playing, clenching his hand into a fist, “It was a selfish decision on my part, wanting to bask in the simplicity of what we had for as long as possible before I had to give myself over to the machinations of creating an album. What I failed so spectacularly at was considering her feelings, her expectations and hopes as to what we could be. By omitting that truth from the beginning and trying to shield her from it, even believing that I was doing the honorable thing, hurt her far more than telling her from the start.”

She could see the frustration and self loathing in his gaze. It made her want to soothe him and shake him at the same time.

He blinked, seemingly remembering that he was being filmed and gave a brittle smile to the camera, “It should come as no surprise that it all came ‘round to bite me in the arse. I’ll admit that I spent a good amount of time as the living embodiment of a Morrisey album. Listened to a few of them ad nauseum to boot. It took a good friend knocking some sense into me and a few words of advice Liam had given me long ago: ‘A man unwilling to fight for what he wants deserves what he gets’.

“I deserve every second of her silence, every ounce of her anger, and I will respect her decision regarding us, whatever it may be, but I have one final plea to make. She may never see this, the bloody idiot that told me to do this will also be editing this and might cut this all out, but I’ve laid myself bare so that she perhaps might come to understand why I’d done the things that hurt her so.

“Sw-” he cut himself off, looking down as his jaw ticked in frustration before he took a breath and looked back to the camera, his gaze sincere and open, “Love, I’m sorry for lying to you. I’m sorry for making you feel used and unimportant and as though you were dupe in a scheme designed to benefit everyone but yourself. It was never my intention to make you feel that way but my actions and my lies did so all the same. I’m sorry, love, for everything.”

Her tears were falling freely but she made no move to brush them away. They were too quick and numerous for her to bother. In the video Killian had started playing his guitar again, his fingers plucking out the notes of a tune she still couldn’t place but that he seemed to know very well.

“I wrote this after an eye opening night in Chicago. This is my truth, love, it was then and it is now.”

With that he began to play in earnest. She could hear echoes of the songs he’d written with Milah and Liam, a distinctive style that even the chasm of a decade couldn’t erase. There was something more to it though, a longing in his voice she’d never heard before but it was far from melancholic, she could almost feel a wellspring of hope bubbling within it. Then she actually listened to the lyrics he was singing.

And all of the steps that led me to you

And all of the hell I had to walk through

But I wouldn't trade a day for the chance to say

My love, I'm in love with you

The phone tumbled from Emma’s suddenly numb fingers. The video kept playing but the audio was muffled in the folds of her robe. Scrambling to pick it back up and muttering curses while desperately trying to hear the rest of the song she fumbled with the phone for what felt like minutes before it was back in her hand and facing the right way. With a shaking finger she scrolled back until the point where he started to play and began watching again. When he played the final note she scrolled back and watched it again. After the fourth time she let the video keep playing, though she could barely focus on it through the sobs she was holding back.

Killian gave the camera a pained smile, his hands folded over his guitar. He seemed on the verge of saying something and she held her breath. Instead he shook his head and leaned forward, reaching towards the camera. The video ended there, an emotionless black screen with links to a few of the more popular music videos that Realm of Jewels had made. Emma sat staring at the thumbnails in a stupor, her mind whirring with too many thoughts to even begin to process what she was feeling. It was only when her screen went dark from inactivity that she made a decision. Unlocking her phone she brought up her contacts and tapped on the name of the person she’d been avoiding talking to for days. They picked up on the second ring.

“I know it’s late but I need a favor.”

#captain swan #cs ff #cs fan fic #cs fanfic #cs fan fiction #captain swan ff #captain swan fan fic #captain swan fanfic #captain swan fan fiction #ouat ff #my writing

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vventure · 4 years

Text

Played - Atsumu Miya Must Die, Ch. 3

Series Mini Mlist: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Pairing: Atsumu Miya x fem!reader

Genre: Angst, Drama

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: cheating

Summary: Atsumu Miya is a player; dating three girls from three different friend groups so they don’t find out. What happens when they do, though? And how does [Y/N] play into their plan for ultimate revenge?

A/N: Alright, this chapter really finally gets into the drama. I know it’s longer than the other chapters but it had to be this length in order to fit everything I wanted into it! I hope you guys enjoy it, and I can’t wait to share all the scheming to come with you all. <3

Taglist: @for-ests @miyuswriting @babyboytsutomu @captain-shittykawa @writeiolite @lunarknox @heccingdead @yams046 @infamouswhitepawsies @hideewrites @lilolpotato @burnthoneymint @bb-noya - let me know if you’d like to be added (or taken off)!!

Last Time:

Chika laid down the facts: Atsumu was dating three different girls from three different friend groups. It was a secret to everyone but he and Chika, and now you, that he was doing this. Atsumu would only come to Onigiri Miya when Osamu wasn’t working. He was somewhat of an idiot in that respect, and Osamu had caught him with different girls at the establishment before, but the bleached twin had played it off as him seeing different girls every week; something that wasn’t outside of the realm of possibility for the player.

Chika went on to explain that while Atsumu used to work at the onigiri shop for his brother, he had taken time off in order to focus on university and his club volleyball team at the school. He was arrogant and self-centered, and often lied to his brother even about small things. The picture Chika painted was far from flattering.

You sat looking at her during her spiel, your jaw basically on the floor.

“So, yeah,” she finished. “He’s kind of a mess and a jackass.”

“Thanks for the warning, I’ll try to avoid him.”

“About that,” her smile strained as she spoke her next words: “He’s moving into the same dorm as you tomorrow.”

The day rose in a blaze of sun, the perfect weather for a barbecue on the quad at your new university. It was too hot for wearing anything other than a tank top and shorts since there was no way you were going to make it through the two-hour long event with no shade if you wore anything else.

A cacophony of laughter and raucous excitement reached your ears as you stepped onto the lush green of the expansive quad, taking in the plethora of grills and the several volleyball and badminton nets set-up to enjoy with fellow students. Clusters of students from every year were scattered about the lawn, drinking from plastic cups and munching on snacks while trying to find the courage to jump into an activity and break free of their timidity.

It should have come as no surprise, but Atsumu Miya had no issues with running head first into a new adventure. He was playing 2-on-2 volleyball at one of the nets, showing off just how high he could jump to slam the ball down on the grass on the opposite side of the net. His athleticism shined here, clearly leaps and bounds beyond the others he was volleying with who looked like they were about to pass-out from heat stroke while desperately trying to match his pace.

It would have been almost comical, the difference in skill between someone who was obviously well-versed in volleyball and someone who had never touched a ball in their life, except that Atsumu looked so smug every time he scored a point for his team. It was hardly a competition and even from this distance you could tell he was letting it get to his head.

Turning your attention away, you nearly collided with another person as you moved to grab a drink from one of the coolers. The person you were now face-to-face with wore a black t-shirt with “RA” in white lettering across the place a breast pocket would be.

“I’m so sorry!” You blurted out, backing up slightly and raising your hands. “I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Don’t worry about it!” They replied, a genial smile splitting their face in response to your sudden panic. “You look familiar. I think you moved onto my floor yesterday! Yeah, [Y/n], right?”

“Guilty,” you quipped, looking at them closely. It clicked into place once you noticed their black bangs pinned back with their high pigtails. “You’re the resident assistant on my floor...Nanami, right?”

“Yep,” she replied, giving you a thumbs up. Her cheerfulness seemed a bit forced, but you smiled back at her regardless. “It’s actually good ya bumped into me ‘cause I was looking to round up the girls to play some volleyball. You in?”

“Um, sure, I don’t really have anything else to do.”

That’s how you found yourself entangled in a lot more than you’d bargained for: an icebreaker activity with Atsumu’s three girlfriends.

“Let’s say our names and then a fun fact about us,” Nanami said once the small group of girls she could find was rounded into a seated circle. “I’ll go first. My name’s Nanami and I love going to concerts!”

Dead silence befell the group as they all looked at her, expressionless. It was hot and she was making you all sit in the sun and tell a fun fact about yourselves? Weren’t you supposed to be playing volleyball?

“Cool,” said the girl clad in sports attire, repping the school’s colors. “I’m Sara, I play for the soccer team here and love kick-boxing.”

Sara used her thumb to point to the girl on her right, taking charge of the situation so they could all get it over with.

“I’m Izumi,” came the soft voice of a girl with her eyes turned shyly downward. “I work in the library in my spare time.”

Could this be any more dull? So much for a fun barbecue.

The next girl down the line stated her name and a fact about herself that slipped through your mind like water until it was Atsumu’s final girlfriend’s turn.

“My name’s Aiko, and I play the violin,” she said, flicking her long hair over her shoulder and fiddling with the hem of her pure white blouse.

Once again, this elicited no response and all eyes now rested on you as they waited for your name and riveting factoid.

“I’m [Y/n] and I work at an onigiri shop off-campus and just moved here from Miyagi.”

A pregnant pause followed your statement as the small group merely blinked in acknowledgement of each other’s existence before Nanami’s voice cut through the heavy air: “Let’s play volleyball!”

The group stood, returning shredded grass particles to the ground and moved like cattle to the volleyball nets.

“I’m gonna ditch, my boyfriend wants to get boba,” the girl whose name you couldn’t remember whispered into your ear before skipping away from the group now composed of only you, Sara, Aiko, Izumi, and Nanami.

Just perfect, you were going to be playing volleyball with three girls dating the same guy and the person who would be watching every move you made in the dorms for the year, what could be more ideal? You almost wished Osamu had put you on the schedule today, but he’d given you the first week of classes off to acclimate to the new university.

It was done now, so you’d make the most of the situation and maybe get a new friend out of it. Izumi seemed really sweet and down-to-earth, so you’d give chatting with her a shot. Walking up beside her, you opened your mouth to say something before the realization that you knew a dirty secret she didn’t about the guy she was seeing hit you. You snapped your mouth closed and walked the remainder of the expanse of green to the free volleyball net.

A collective gasp sounded from the group as you approached the net, causing you to look up from the ground you’d been examining in order to avoid tripping. When you saw where their heads were turned, you sighed internally.

Of course, every single one of them had their eyes locked on Atsumu finishing up his game on the make-shift volleyball court next to the one you’d soon be playing on. He had sweat pouring down his face from what you could imagine was the heat and exertion, and you couldn’t tear your eyes away as he lifted his shirt to wipe at his face exposing the glistening muscles of his abdomen.

What was this, a teen movie? No one looked that hot after playing a taxing sport and it was highly unfair that someone so vile could look so good.

“Okay, girls,” Nanami said, clapping her hands together yet again. “I’m gonna ref, so choose your teams.”

Aiko immediately flocked to Sara, likely taking in the fact that the latter was a college athlete and would be better poised to win the game. Izumi didn’t look particularly thrilled to be stuck with you as her teammate, but she’d have to deal for the short amount of time you’d be playing.

Sara served first, landing a solid ace across the net that punted against the grass that neither you nor Izumi received, giving your opponents the first point. Aiko and Izumi looked at each other through the net, their eyes suddenly serious. You furrowed your brow, watching how Sara was now in a fighting stance, until the sound of Atsumu’s voice reached your ears.

“So, yer the RA for the boys’ and girls’ floor, eh?” He said, leaning toward Nanami who looked less than pleased to be conversing with him at the current moment.

“That I am,” she replied stiffly, trying to keep her eye on the ball. “I’m kind of busy right now, if you’ll excuse me.”

“I’m sure ya don’t mind if I stay and watch a little bit?”

Nanami shrugged, turning her attention completely away from him. He didn’t appear to care, and didn’t press her any further.

Atsumu was watching the game, that’s why these three were acting like their lives depended on winning a casual volleyball game on the quad. This asshole knew exactly what his presence would do to these girls and was eating it up like a Korean drama.

Whatever, he wasn’t your focus and would never be your focus, so you returned your attention to the game. Your heart clenched in your chest as you watched Aiko look over at Atsumu, sending him a salacious wink just to receive a smirk in return. In the time that your eyes left Sara’s serving form, hoping that no one had noticed the exchange, the volleyball was colliding with your head and sending you reeling.

“[Y/n]!” You could hear Nanami call before her knees were thudding onto the earth next to you, her black pigtails dangling over your face. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” you responded, sitting up to notice that Atsumu had departed with his hand on the upper back of another tall male walking away. A feeling of impending doom flowed over you as you looked at the girls standing near the net, their faces directed at each other expressing confusion and mounting anger. “What’s going on?”

“We’re at the quad for the barbecue, do you have a concussion? What year is it?” The RA asked, clearly not anticipating this at the event.

“I’m fine! What about them?”

“Why were you winking at my boyfriend?” Izumi seethed, her kind and calm demeanor slipping away easily to reveal a nasty underside.

“I was winking at my boyfriend,” Aiko replied, stepping closer to Izumi but remaining on her side of the net. “Atsumu Miya.”

“What the hell did you just say?” Sara bellowed while stomping towards the two already in the throws of their disagreement. “Who’d you say your boyfriend was?”

Izumi and Aiko replied in unison: “Atsumu Miya.”

The trio of Atsumu’s lovers sat a safe 6-feet from each other in the grass, ice packs pressed against the bruises they’d given each other during the scuffle that eventually had to be broken up by the University Police. You’d also tried to pry them apart, which only earned you a split lip and a disciplinary mark on your record for the trouble.

“So, I get the pleasure of explaining what your punishment is,” Nanami said, sitting down on the grass with exaggerated annoyance, producing a map and setting it in the space between everyone. “The resident director thinks it would be a good idea for you guys to clean up around town. So you’ll be tackling the areas I’ve marked every other day and clearing them of all the litter you can see.”

“How long?” You asked, pressing the ice pack to your lip in an attempt to get it to stop stinging so horribly.

“Ten hours, which is pretty lenient,” she explained. “Since you guys don’t have any other infractions she didn’t think it was worth more than that. And she wants you to do it together to learn some cooperation and teamwork.”

The tension in the air was suffocating at this news and not a single girl could look the other in the eye, opting to stare at their feet while nursing their wounds.

“This is all your fault, Aiko,” Sara spat.

“How is it--” Aiko began before you cut her off.

“I don’t know,” you spoke up, raising your hand in defense as Aiko shot you a glare, her white blouse sullied with dirt. “Seems like you all got played, right? He told you all that he had to keep his relationship with you secret, right?”

A grumble rose around the small area between the 5 of you.

“Okay, so he was lying to you so he could mess around with other people, so who’s fault is it really?”

You had no idea the trouble your logical mind had gotten you into.

#Atsumu Miya #Miya Atsumu #Atsumu Miya x reader #Miya Atsumu x reader #haikyuuwritersnet #tw: cheating #tw cheating #Haikyuu!!#Haikyu!!#hq!!#Haikyuu!! angst #Haikyu!! angst

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simp-for-spencer-reid · 4 years

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Sugar with a Side of Coffee Ch. 3

A/N: This is the new, rewritten chapter three. Enjoy! :)

Ch.1 Ch. 2 Ch. 2.5

Chapter 3: A Night Out

Friday came around fast, and with a rainy morning, so the girls opted not to put out the cart. The little shop was quite busy, filling with both cart customers and the regular shop customers. Between orders, Marta discussed her plans with Cate.

“So, I was thinking that we could go back to yours, I could borrow some clothes, and then we can go straight out to the pub on 18th street!” It was clear that Marta had been planning this all along. Cate laughed and shook her head.

“I think you just have your eyes on that red shirt you found the last time you slept over.” Cate remembered when her and Marta got wine drunk together and had put on a bit of a fashion show for Shrimp. Marta had discovered a bright red long sleeve shirt, with a deep neckline. Cate had not worn it in years, the last she remembered of that shirt was a failed date.

“Okay, you caught me, but it’s so cute!” Marta whined. “And I haven’t seen my cat nephew in like a week!”

Marta had driven them both to Cate’s apartment in her car. Once in the door, Marta scooped up Shrimp and coddled him like a baby. He gently swiped a paw up to her face. Cate made her way to the bedroom to get down to business.

“So if you’re wearing the red top, what does that leave me?” Cate called out, examining her hangers. “I have this green dress that's not too fancy? No, too christmas-y” she continues rummaging through each hanger. Marta walked in carrying Shrimp and stood next to Cate.

“What about that?” Marta pointed to the right side of Cate’s closet. Cate followed her gaze and pulled a black satin-like fabric tank top off a hanger. “Actually, I changed my mind, I’ll wear this and you can wear the red top!” Marta released Shrimp, who ran off, flicking his ears, and Marta traded her work uniform for the black tank top and white jeans. Cate quickly found the red top, discarding her white button up for it. She threw her work pants in the laundry bin and pulled on black jeans and tucked the red top into them.

“Okay, remind me again why you hate this top? It’s so hot!” Marta eyed her best friend. Cate grabbed some gold bangles to pull over the long sleeves. Marta grabbed her friend’s hands and spun her to face her. “Seriously, Cate!” Marta gestured to Cate’s cleavage that was now being shown off. Cate blushed, and grabbed a pair of heels for herself and Marta.

The bar on 18th was shaped like a giant rectangle, with the bartenders in the middle tending to the patrons on the outer perimeter. Cate and Marta were sitting on one of the shorter ends of the bar. They were almost shouting at each other to be heard over the music.

“Did you get Spencer’s number from the other night?” Marta asked loudly after sipping her vodka cran. Cate looked at her water, thinking that she should order one for Marta so she would slow down her drinking.

“No,” she shook her head to make sure she was understood. As she glanced around the bar, her eyes landed on an all too familiar face at the other end of the bar. There sat amongst a group was Spencer. Marta followed Cate’s gaze.

“Well, no time like the present!” Marta stood up and tugged Cate out of her seat.

On the other side of the bar, Spencer was nursing a ginger ale while he watched JJ play darts with Emily. Derek was ordering another beer for himself and Rossi. The team’s casework was completed rather early for a Friday night, so the unit had gone out for a few drinks to celebrate.

“I don’t know why I agreed to this.” Emily grumbled, getting smoked by JJ and her insanely accurate dart skills.

“Oh, come on. I’m going easy on you!” JJ tossed another dart. Rossi laughed under his breath, taking his new beer from Derek. Spencer was still oblivious, watching the dart tournament between JJ and Emily.

“Dibs.” Marta turned back to Cate after staring at Derek even when he turned away. The girls approached Derek and Spencer.

“Hi,” Marta said, looking at Spencer. His eyes widened, flustered, looking at the clearly buzzed girl in front of him. Cate rolled her eyes at her friend for putting on her flirting voice. “Didn’t think I’d see you here, sweater vest.”

“Um, I’m sorry, do I know you?” he asked Marta honestly.

“We’re pretty hard to recognize without the aprons.” Marta shrugged. Derek sauntered over as Spencer looked at him for help. Spencer finally saw Cate from behind Marta. When he pulled his eyes up to meet hers, he realized she was the girl from the coffee shop, wearing something very low cut. Cate exhaled, trying to calm her nerves. This is not how she envisioned tonight, babysitting a buzzed Marta, and standing in front of Spencer in such a scandalous top.

“That would be Marta.” Cate gestured to her friend. “Her parents own The Empty Mug.” She told Spencer, seeing as he’d been frequenting the coffee cart.

“And this,” Marta side hugged Cate tightly. “Is one of my bestest friends, Catherine.” Marta grinned widely, proud of her antics. “But you already knew that, didn’t you, Spencer.” Marta gave him a wink. Cate wished Marta hadn’t pregamed so hard at her apartment before they left.

“What do we have here? Derek.” He introduced himself with a handshake. Marta giggled as she took his hand. Cate looked to Spencer, hoping he wasn’t getting the wrong impression of them.

“She doesn’t get out much” Cate tried to explain with a smile. Cate noticed the nonalcoholic drink in his hands.

“Ah, so I see you’ve gotten picked as designated driver too?” Cate raised her glass of water. Spencer opened his mouth, but nothing was coming out.

Hotch, JJ, and Prentiss watched from the distance of their table near the dart boards. Penelope and Rossi returned from the new age electronic jukebox. Penelope was the first to speak what was on the team’s mind.

“Who are those girls talking to Derek and Reid?” She looks towards JJ and Emily.

“No idea.” JJ spoke. Despite the curiosity, none of them made a move towards Morgan or Reid.

“Poor Reid, his IQ must be flying out the window.” Emily watched Spencer as he watched the girls walk to the bathroom. She decided that now would be a good time to approach the boys about their new friends.

When they made it to the boys, Rossi bent down and pretended to pick something up. When he stood up, he held out his hand to Spencer.

“I think you dropped this, kid.” Rossi told Spencer. Spencer looked at him quizzically. “It’s your jaw.” The team laughed, while Spencer just blushed.

“I don’t know why I still hang around you guys.” Spencer laughed, shaking his head.

“They work at The Empty Mug.” Derek spoke up. “You better work your magic, Pretty Boy, and get them to deliver to the BAU.”

“Oh, I second that! The coffee was great.” Emily agreed. The team scattered when they saw the girls returning, even Derek stepped back, leaving Spencer to fend for himself.

Marta’s eyes found Derek all too quickly, and she grabbed his hand to lead him to the dancefloor. Cate shook her head at her wild friend, but smiled lovingly at her.

“Looks like Derek met his match.” Spencer said to Cate, but he was watching Marta drag Derek to dance. Cate took a sip from her water, trying to hydrate her dry, nervous throat.

“What are the chances that you’d be waiting in line, when that kid stole my tip jar.” Cate laughed to Spencer. Derek had returned to the team with Marta in tow, filling them in on his little plan.

“Well, the odds of getting robbed in the U.S. are one in 667.” Spencer shrugged, shoving his hands in his pockets. “It’s an average of 150 robberies a year per 100,000 population.” He rambles off, “And it’s just timing my job plus my love for coffee.”

“How did you just know that?” Cate stared in amazement. Spencer stuttered before he managed a full sentence about his eidetic memory. “So you know like everything?”

“Well, as long as I read about it or see it once, I can remember a lot.” Spencer could feel his blush creeping up his ears.

“Okay shut your eyes.”

Spencer did.

“What color are my eyes?” Cate tested.

“Light Brown” Spencer answered fast. “But I knew that from when we first met.” He mentally face palmed himself for saying something so forward. His eyes were still shut.

“Okay then let me give you something harder.” Cate slowly swiveled her head, looking around the bar. “What color is-”

“That’s not really the best judgement of my memory, I’ve had FBI training on how to assess a room in less than ten seconds.” Spencer opened his eyes. “I can recite things from memory, which would be a better measure of my memory.” Cate was in awe. “Like, for instance, pick a book, any book. I’m well versed in most literature.” Spencer had now turned to face her. Cate was smiling up at him.

“Any book? Okay, how about the first sentence of John Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men?” Cate quizzed, picking the first obscure book she thought of.

“ A few miles south of Soledad, the Salinas River drops in close to the hillside bank and runs deep and green.” Spencer recalled, almost immediately.

“Impressive.” Cate nodded, pursing her lips.

Derek and Marta were up to no good, huddled over a table. The rest of the team were watching Cate and Spencer’s awkward flirt exchange like a car crash, they couldn’t turn away. Penelope pretended to wipe her eyes.

“I’m just so proud. He didn’t even use any magic tricks.” JJ nodded her head in agreement. “I hope we get to add another girl to our girls nights.” Penelope continued.

“I’m just hoping we can get that coffee in our building somehow” Emily half-joked.

Marta stood up from the table, and walked back over towards Cate and Spencer. She tapped Cate on the back three times, which was their signal to go to the bathroom together. Cate waited exactly ten seconds for Marta to get a headstart and it wouldn’t look suspicious.

“I should go check on Marta, excuse me.” Cate turned to walk towards the ladies’ room and entered. “Marta?” Cate saw only one stall was closed. “Everything alright?” The toilet flushed and the stall door opened to reveal Marta. She wore a devilish grin.

“What?” Cate looked through the mirror at Marta’s reflection.

“Look what I got from a certain friend of an agent.” Marta held a napkin up with numbers written in blue pen, pleased with herself.

“You got Derek’s number?” Cate gasped, surprised.

“I wish.” Marta. “It’s Spencer’s number.” Marta held out the napkin for Cate.

“What?” Cate said in disbelief. “Spencer gave you his number?” Marta shook her head.

“Derek gave me Spencer’s number to give to you.” Marta picked up Cate’s hand and tucked the napkin into it. “Don’t say I’ve never done anything for you” Marta was smiling, then turned pale. “Hold that thought.” she turned on her heel and rushed to a toilet, emptying her stomach.

Cate opened the door to the bathroom, feeling nauseous from the noises of her friend. Spencer was no longer in the hallway. He must’ve gone back to his seat. Cate thought. When she glanced over to where they had been sitting, they weren’t there. With no company, Cate turned back around to comfort her friend in the bathroom.

“Let’s get you home.” Cate said as she rubbed Marta’s back.

#spencer reid #spencer reid x oc #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fluff #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #penelope garcia #derek morgan #aaron hotchner #david rossi #emily prentiss #sugar with a side of coffee fanfic

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goldeneyedgirl · 4 years

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2020 Fic Meme

It happens every year like clockwork. The Fic Round-Up Meme. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t looking forward to it this year because I’ve written so much. As usual, compiled from ancient Livejournal fic memes. I like doing it as kind of a time capsule of my writing. If anyone else wants to take a crack, feel free. I love reading writers’ throughs on their own work. <3 No tagging because that is PRESSURE.

Twilight

12 Days of Fic-Mas (Twilight, WIP) Day 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 + Christmas Eve Twelve days of fic extracts, previews, and drabbles focusing on Alice Cullen and Jess/Jasper Hale: Anathema, the KidFic, Married in Vegas, Daemons, Memento Vivere, Human Alice Kills James, Jess and Alice do Prom, Forgotten, Vampires in Vegas, Shadow to Light Missing Scene, Hybrid, Cowboys and Angel Solstice, and All These Broken Things

Afterglow (Alice/Jasper, AU, Romance, G) There were three things of which she was certain. The first was that her name was Alice. The second was that she was born an angel. And three, she was getting ready to die.

Against a Wall (Alice/Jasper, Human/Vampire AU, Romance, Angst, PG) If you asked anyone with the surname ‘Whitlock’, they’d tell you that the family was cursed. It was the Whitlock Curse to blame the day the bank took the ranch away from Jasper’s own father.

And Found (Alice/Jasper, Soulmark AU, Romance, PG) The soul mark appears when Alice is six. It is a twisted ribbon of a mark, from the inside of her left elbow, up her arm, over her shoulder, along her clavicle, over her right shoulder and down to her right wrist. What ugly, soulless individual could inspire such a mark?

Jar of Hearts Pt 1 Pt 2 (WIP) (Alice, Emmett, Seth, MCU xover, Angst, PG) The snap came for everyone - “He said he’d never leave me,” she says in a wobbly voice. “He promised me.”“It wasn’t by choice,” Emmett rushes to tell her. “You were his last thought; he tried so hard to get home before he…”

Never a Question (Alice/Jasper, AU, Angst, G) Carlisle is quite sure that he’s watching his son’s heart break into a million pieces as he stares at his human mate, slowly dying alone, not a single person allowed to hold her hand.

Hand in Hand (Alice/Jasper, AU, Fluff, G) “Never,” he swears, pressing a kiss to her cheek that makes her beam - “There’s not a single moment I can think of that cannot be improved by your presence, darlin’.”

Love & Duty (Alice/Jasper, AU, Romance, G) A trainee witch is sent to treat a wounded cowboy from her brother coven.

Shadow to Light (WIP) (Alice/Jasper, AU Angst, PG) In 1918, Jasper lures the newborn known as Mary-Alice back to Monterrey. He is lost to her before it even begins. (Ch 6-8)

The Way of Things (Alice/Jasper, AU, Drama, M) She truly doesn’t know what comes next. He truly doesn’t know if it will be good or bad. They will live this life for as long as it lasts, long may it last, surrounded by the people they love and trust.

What You Say (Alice/Jessamine, Canon, Angst, M) Edward might have thought Aro was their reckoning, but Alice knows for her, it is Jessamine’s hurt.

Total number of completed stories: ELEVEN.

Total word count: 90,155 words were formally posted - not including snippets, previews (aside from FicMas) or anything that was shared on the Discord server.

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted? I fucking nailed it. Like, seriously. THREE chapters of Shadow to Light? Every single day of JaliceWeek AND FicMas? I mean, I think the lockdown definitely helped with free time, and not going to lie, the iOS shutdown of Fortnite probably assisted my productivity.

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? The Discord has so much to answer for. I wrote porn. Like, what. What. What. What. I find this bizarre and did not have ‘let’s just go full NC17 in 2020′ on my bingo card, but it happened. In fact, 2019 Lexie has just gone full spit-take and yelled, “WHAT?!” at the top of her lungs.

And to make it more surprising, it’s both het and f/f porn. Like, mind-blown. Who am I anymore?

What’s your own favourite story of the year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you happiest? The Way of Things, What You Say, And Found, & Afterglow. All fics that came together really well, that felt like *me*, and had hopeful endings. I’m really proud of them.

STL doesn’t get an opportunity to be apart of this til it’s finished.

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them? The porn.

Apparently, I can write it. Who knew?

I definitely threw caution to the wind with JaliceWeek and just went for whatever crossed my mind and stopped worrying so much. Like, whatever, this is what I want to write so I will. I mean, the MCU crossover is happening in a slightly more obscure way than I initially envisaged it, it’s definitely a better fic for it.

I joined the Discord, and that’s been amazing. I’ve spent my last few fandoms existing in kind of a vacuum because of bad experiences and the fact I’m usually doing something niche, so having people to talk to who are so nice and welcoming and are happy to ignore my special brand of obnoxiousness is so lovely and has had such a good affect on my mental health. Sometimes you need people you can be your dorkiest self with.

My instincts are pretty good as far as fic goes, people are awesome, and I can write sex scenes. It’s been a learning curve, let me tell you that.

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the New Year? I have to balance grad school, my business, and my writing, so that’s going to be interesting. I think I need to look at my fic more as downtime than a high-stress ‘job’ because I LOVE writing it. I love writing. I love reading. But I get in my own head and overthink. So my goals are BALANCE and RELAX.

My best story of this year: Oh man, that’s not something I can judge. I am so incredibly proud of how Afterglow, And Found, and The Way of Things turned out. Especially considering I was so behind with JaliceWeek, and I think I was putting out a fic a day, and freaking out because I was lacking ideas, so when these three just came together exactly how I wanted them, it was a good moment.

My most popular story: Shadow to Light. Look, if that’s my legacy to fandom, I’ve done pretty damn well. I’m really, really appreciative of how enthusiastic people are about this ‘verse. I don’t always understand it, because I can see how my writing has changed and how the story has evolved massively (first it was supposed to be a one-shot, then five chapters.) I hope that it ends up being satisfying for everyone because I have LOVED writing it, even if I am slower than molasses.

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: Everyone is always so damn enthusiastic about my writing. I think maybe Hybrid is kind of a big question mark for everyone at the moment because there are so many questions and no answers yet.

And any of the Jessamine/Alice. That’s a new niche, I get not everyone is into it. But it’s happening and will continue into 2020.

Most fun story to write: What You Say or Jess and Alice at Prom. Jess is a little snarkier than Jasper, less controlled, and the girls are super fun to write, even high-tension scenes.

Most Sexy Story: Oh, I can answer this now! Um, maybe The Way of Things or Jess and Alice at Prom? Yup, those are my picks.

Story with the single sexiest moment: The Way of Things. This happened before the Discord Intervention, and I’m genuinely not sure if I’m happy with the end of the Prom fic, so it might be reworked slightly in the future. But The Way of Things I was really happy with because it covered so many ideas I had in a way that fit together well.

That’s where she makes good on her unspoken promises from aeons again, of their private victory celebration. She sits astride him, her hips rolling hard against his, drawing out his groans and growls as he grips her thighs almost tight enough to crack. Their gazes are locked the entire time, her tongue skimming over her lips, as she lets her emotions tell him everything that she wants and everything she plans to take.

He remembers fucking her in the dirt in Dacia; his mouth between her legs as she hollered obscenities in a Paris attic; and the urgent, passionate loving-making of a marriage finally consummated.

She remembers bloody emeralds looped around her throat and resting between her breasts as she gets down on her knees and takes him into her mouth, his fingers tangled in her hair; the delicious weight of him on top of her, their sweat mingling and cooling in the frozen night as their flimsy bed creaked against the wall; and his soft encouragement in her ear as he grasps her around the waist, their hands resting together on the gentle swell of her stomach.

Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story: I think I restrained myself from anything too dark or twisted this year, actually. Oh, wait, Vampires in Vegas. That one has some pretty dark implications about Alice’s life, about the vampire underworld, and Jasper’s behaviour, especially as it goes one. No fic that deals with someone being put into sex work without educated consent is going to avoid being dark, and I think it’s logical that vampires would have their hands in a lot of illegal yet profitable areas.

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: Anything with Jessamine/Alice because, like, Jess isn’t a name-swap of Jasper, and the relationship dynamic shifts with the slight personality shifts. And then you have to consider the family and social dynamic of two women in the relationship, so working all that out was fun.

Jar of Hearts is another one, because I had to work out who the fic was going to follow and what was lost. And Emmett and Alice pretty much don’t interact in canon, but they were chosen for a reason. I’ve stripped them down to their worst, most isolated selves without their ‘true north’ (Rose and Jasper) or their moral center (Carlisle and Esme), or even their secret weapon (Edward). Seth, too, has been isolated from his family and friends, and is especially ‘other’ in this situation. This is an MCU crossover, so we’re kind of following a heroes’ journey with the last of Forks’ supernatural creatures.

Hardest story to write: Shadow to Light because of the way I have to use language, because of the plot strands from canon when I hate writing canon material, and how the characters have changed and how this new version reflects the old version.

Against a Wall, as well, because of the in-verse time crunch I had - I needed Jasper damaged, military-minded, and changed by age 19. And I needed the boy broken. I’m happy with it, the story is done and dusted, but it didn’t quite turn out how I planned. And that’s okay, because I like this version. But I think I tackled something a lot bigger than I anticipated with it.

Most disappointing: Look, I love the verse and the set-up, but I think Love & Duty could do with another 2k words for build-up. I just ran out of time, honestly, to build up that mutual attraction between Alice and Jasper.

Easiest story to write: Anathema, because Alice’s voice was so clear in it. Anathema!Alice knows exactly who she is, and that’s always fun. And the Shadow to Light Missing Scene; it wasn’t as long as I hoped, but it turned out exactly as I imagined it happening.

Biggest surprise: Everyone really, really liked Forgotten. And Vampires in Vegas, which I honestly thought were the weakest offerings during FicMas.

Most unintentionally telling story: The Way of Things. There’s so little dialogue, and it’s covering such a massive amount of time and story that it’s intentionally written to tell.

Story I’d like to revise: Love & Duty, and Married in Vegas. A little polish, a little shine, it’s fine. For Love & Duty, it’s definitely the time crunch I need to go back and fix; for Married in Vegas, it’s just reflective of how long ago I started it. I’m a better writer, I know the characters more, and I’m less prone to overly dramatic plot twists.

Story I didn’t write but will at some point, I swear: Look, let me lay the groundwork now so that no one who isn’t on the Discord isn’t startled.

There’s going to be a Jess/Jasper/Alice threesome fic, and I regret nothing.

I really, really want to get All These Broken Things redone and posted because it’s getting silly how long it’s just been sitting there.

I want to actually write Monster, which is a fic I don’t talk about much but I want to write. It’s a question about who the monster of the story is, and I’m not sure I’m as skilled as I should be, to write it, but I want to try.

And one of my numerous attempts at a Haunted House Cryptid fic. It has to happen, I have so many ideas!

#my fic #writing meme #meme #twilight renaissance #jalice

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foyetsnewhitlist · 4 years

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Perfect- Final Chapter

masterlist | ch. 9

Word Count: 1,296 words

POV: Reid caught Jordan and now he has to tell Hotch but is too scared.

(A few days later at the BAU after the case was solved)

“Nice work on this case Y/N and Reid.” Hotch congratulates Jordan and I, not knowing the truth.

“Well actually-” I begin to speak before being cut off.

“Thanks Hotch I think Reid and I make a pretty great team!” She looks over at me and flashes a beautifully evil smile.

“Haha yea what Y/N said.” I say reluctantly not trying to expose the truth in front of everyone.

“Ooh pretty boy is blushing does someone have a crush?” Morgan snickers at me.

“Spencer and Y/N sitting in a tree…” Emily starts, “K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” JJ finishes.

“Why do you look so confused, Spence?” JJ questions me.

“Did you not understand the song?” Emily asks, staring at my face.

“What? Was the song supposed to mean something?”

“You sure something else.” Emily responded.

“I must have missed it.” I look at the girls with a perplexed look on my face.

“It’s okay Spence, you'll get em next time.” JJ reminds me while walking away with Emily laughing, which I can only assume was about me.

“Wow Spencer you sure are something else. I’m gonna go get lunch wanna join?” Jordan offers nicely.

“No I’m okay I have some things to finish up here.”

“Lunch? I’m in!” Morgan says inviting himself.

“Are we getting Italian?” Rossi yells from across the room.

“Only if you’re paying old man.” Morgan jokes.

“Count me in! I know the best place in town with the most authentic Italian food!” Rossi explains while pushing the two out the door. Finally, I’m alone with Hotch now's my time to tell him what we found. I walk over to Garcias office to get her assistance to prove everything to Hotch.

*Knocks on door*

“Hey, heyyyyy” I say while peering my head into the room.

“Spencer! I’m so happy you guys are back! What brings you to the batcave?”

“Everyone left the office except for Hotch. I think it's time we show him what we found.”

“I’m nervous Spence.”

“Me too Garcia but it's now or never.”

“Okay let's go go go!” We walk over to Hotch’s office with Garcia's laptop full of what we found on Jordan's phone. Garcia knocks on Hotch’s door ever so gently.

“Come in!” Hotch quickly reacts and almost jumps out of his seat. “Oh it’s just you guys, what’s up?”

“Okay so you know how you kind of sort of maybe uh told us to you know not do a certain tiny thing?”

“Get to the point Garcia.” Hotch demands.

“I found Y/N planting evidence and using another phone to communicate so I asked Garcia to bug it and see what messages she could find and this is what we found.” I let out a wind of relief after speeding through that explanation as quickly as I could.

“Okay Reid slow down. These are very big accusations you’re making here.”

“I know Hotch but the evidence is undeniable.”

“See for yourself sir.” Garcia says while turning the laptop over to face him. I watch as Hotch begins to read the text messages. I can visualize the gears turning in his head. He looks confused, saddened and almost relieved. I don’t know why he’d be relieved. Did we finally figure out the truth? Is he going to open up to us? Or is he going to make some sorry excuse for this conniving leach.

“I need you both to promise me you will keep this information to yourself and not tell a soul.” Hotch says in the most earnest tone I’ve ever heard.

“Why? What’s wrong?” Garcia prods.

“I said promise me!”

“Okay...we promise.” Garcia and I shakily say in unison. We watch as Hotch pulls out a mammoth file.

“I’m about to explain everything to you please don’t interrupt.” Hotch says while glaring at Garcia who is notorious for interrupting with questions.

“Yes sir.” Garcia says while fake locking her mouth and throwing the fake key away with it.

“This is Jordan’s file. Yes that's right I said Jordan. You guys were on the right track when you first came into my office. What the rest of the team doesn't know is that Jordan is a heinous killer with no remorse, one of the worst killers in history. Worse than the Zodiac and Ted Bundy himself. What sets them apart is that Jordan has a team of hundreds of people behind them cleaning up all evidence. After each mission, Jordan gains a new identity and consumes a new life. From what we know, Jordan has had 17 different identities and is only 26 years old. They complete their mission within weeks for the most part, despite not being bright in school. They are well versed in every criminal act you could think of. To my knowledge, Jordan’s next mission is to destroy the entire BAU by murdering every person in the FBI and taking over the building. That’s why I made arrangements for them to be put on the team so I can watch and profile them. I’m not surprised you were the first to catch on Reid, but this is NOT good. You weren’t supposed to suspect anything and I wasn’t supposed to tell anyone. You guys were in too deep so I felt as if I must tell you so we don’t sabotage our only opportunity.” Hotch lets out a groan of solace for just a moment. The room is silent for a bit.

“Are you guys going to respond or keep looking at me as if I have two heads?” Hotch questions.

“I-I don’t know what to even say. This is worse than I could have ever imagined.” I stammer being at an apparent loss for words.

“Everyday this job reminds me of why I can’t trust anyone ugh.” Garcia says while visibly uncomfortable by what we just heard.

“I think we should tell the rest of the team they deserve to know Hotch! Their lives are at risk. For crying out loud Jordan took Morgan and Rossi to lunch today!” I exclaim worried about the well-being of my friends.

“I was told not to tell anyone Reid.”

“Then let us do it.” Garcia suggests. “That way you can’t get in trouble it’s a win-win.” She continued.

“Yea! Let us gather the team and tell them what we found. If they don’t believe us you can chime in and prove everything to them.” I add on.

“Okay now we just need to figure out how to discreetly tell the team about it without Jordan overhearing and find a safe place to meet too. Jordan has microphones and cameras in all of our homes.”

“GROSS!” Garcia and I say out loud.

“I know it’s gross but those are the lengths they are willing to go to. They will do anything to complete this mission.” Hotch reminds us.

“Okay it’s getting late I need to go home and watch some happy shows and sulk in all of this crazy news. Thank you sir.” Garcia says while walking out the door.

“I’ll be heading out too bye Hotch!”

“Bye be safe!” Hotch calls out to us. As I walked out of Hotch’s office I ran right into Jordan. I noticed a blood stain on the bottom of her shirt.

“Where ya headed Spencer?” Jordan asks me.

“Oh just going home I had to do some paperwork for Hotch cause he’s a bit swamped right now.”

“Got it. Well drive safe! Let’s reschedule for lunch sometime.” Jordan says while giving me an insidious glare. I stare at the blood stain while walking away as quickly as I could. Who does it belong to? Morgan? Rossi? My mind begins to spiral as I watch Jordan walk into Hotch’s office and see a knife in the back of their pants…

TO BE CONTINUED!

Part 2 coming soon!

Tag list: @omgbigfluffwriting @less-intelligent-spencerreid @emy600 @criminalvampminds @classybutstilltrashy @louiscardinalsshi123 @ariccio50

#Criminal Minds #cm #spencer reid fanfiction #fanfic #perfect #finale #jj #Jennifer Jareau #spencer reid #spence #emily prentiss #derek morgan #david rossi #aaron hotchner #Penelope Garcia #part 2 coming soon

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songofclarity · 4 years

Text

Heliocentric

[ Ch. 2 | MDZS Fanfic | Novel-verse AU ]

Canon Divergent AU in which Wen RuoHan gets to live and Nie MingJue has to survive

Or: Nie Mingjue's Very Bad No Good Fire Palace Adventure

Table of Context: Ch. 1

Read on AO3

Rating: Mature

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Whump, Sick Fic, Angst (with a happy ending)

Ships: Lan XiChen/Nie MingJue, non-con Wen RuoHan/Nie MingJue

Notes: For @whumptober2020 Day 2. This is still novel-verse but if this scene reminds you of a certain scene in CQL, that is by design~ Also don't make it easy for them, Nie MingJue! Fight on!

Chapter Two: Collars

They gave Nie MingJue a tonic – forced it down his throat – when he first awoke on a cold stone table and weighed down with heavy metal chains. The rest of the day was spent in a gloomy haze. He didn't know what time it was, if it was night or day, if one day had passed or several.

Meng Yao appeared through the gloom, sometimes wearing Wen suns and flames, sometimes Nie dark knits, and Nie MingJue struggled each time against the chains with nothing else on his mind than the desire to rip him apart.

“Are you awake, Sect Leader Nie?”

Not enough to speak, not even when sharp needles stabbed his skin and dug under his nails. Nie MingJue struggled, and then Meng Yao went away.

The twilight returned to day eventually, as did Meng Yao, standing over him once more.

“I have more medicine for the pain, Sect Leader Nie.”

“I want nothing you have to give,” Nie MingJue retorted through his teeth, every muscle stiff and taught with barely concealed fury. Although the medicine earlier had indeed tempered the pain, it prevented him from meditating and gathering his spiritual energy. Stripped to his waist, the cold stone radiated into his back. It was no Cold Spring of Gusu and all it did was add to his discomfort.

Mediation should have been his priority now, but it was the farthest thing from his mind.

Meng Yao gave him a bored look, then frowned. “Nothing? If you're not in pain now, you will be by this afternoon. Sect Leader Wen has no interest in broken things and you don't want to die, do you?”

Nie MingJue's brows furrowed and the chains rattled as he struggled. Everything that was broken remained broken, but it hurt far less to move now. “Take it yourself then!”

“Please don't be stubborn about this,” Meng Yao said, looking down as he mixed the spoon in the bowl as pitifully as if he'd been kicked. “Think about how HuaiSang will feel if—”

The chains rattled again, the links pinched the skin across Nie MingJue’s chest and arms, and the weight of them made his fragile ribs ache, but Nie MingJue was past caring. “How dare you! Don't speak his name! Don't speak at all!”

“Fine,” Meng Yao snapped. The bowl clattered to the floor as he tossed it aside. “Sect Leader Nie knows best. It's not as though you listen to anyone anyway—”

“Listen to what? To your excuses? To those lies you thought would work on me?” Nie MingJue didn't grow up raising Nie HuaiSang to become so blind. All he wanted was the truth, but all Nie HuaiSang had to do was stick out his tongue and show how black it was with ink.

“I'm not lying! I practiced my saber before I started painting, Da-ge!”

��With what saber? The one that's been in my office all day collecting dust again?”

“I wasn't lying!” Meng Yao stood up straighter, and Nie MingJue was almost surprised he didn't hear him stomp his foot. He was clearly insulted, childishly so. Nie MingJue had seen him use the Wen sword and technique with his own eyes. He was lying.

Nie MingJue let out a harsh, strangled laugh. “Listen to you kill those disciples and ask for more, you mean!?”

He could picture it clearly by just closing his eyes: the Sun Palace. The pool of blood. Their bodies on the floor. Meng Yao holding Baxia in his hands. “Why don’t you take a guess at how many times Sect Leader Wen has to slap it for it to break this time?”

“What did you do with Baxia?” Nie MingJue bit out.

It was the wrong question. The weight of the room shifted.

Meng Yao smiled and it did not reach his eyes. “I don't think Baxia is what you should be worrying about right now, Sect Leader Nie.” There was a forewarning in his voice. A clear threat. “Since you didn't want to take the medicine, we don't need to wait for the effects to set in.” He gestured to the Wen-dogs to approach and they came with chains dangling in their hands. “We'll proceed with putting Sect Leader Nie on the hooks now.”

“Don't you dare—”

“I can see you've regained your energy, Sect Leader Nie, that's good,” Meng Yao praised. “I would like to demonstrate some new inventions for Sect Leader Wen. You should be able to tolerate them, so please do your best.”

Nie MingJue's stomach twisted. This was his old lieutenant!?

A metal collar, not unlike the one his sect disciples had worn, clamped around Nie MingJue's neck. The weight of it strangled his throat and he twisted on the table. But twisting and thrashing out didn't stop them from wrapping his arms and legs in new chains before removing the ones holding him down.

A pair of Wen-dogs dragged him off without warning and he crashed and stumbled as his feet sought ground. All the blood left his head from the sudden upright position. The room spun and he swayed dangerously.

By the time he recovered, the group of Wen-dogs had made a circle around him. The chains hung in all directions, ready to pull him each and every way.

Certainly they could try.

“Please watch your step, Sect Leader Nie,” Meng Yao said, standing back and observing, just as he had stood back and observed a hundred little tasks while working in Hejian. That nothing had changed but the sides they stood on made Nie MingJue’s skin crawl. “Any blood left on the floor can be quite slippery.”

“The only blood on the floor will be yours.”

Nie MingJue lunged, and the Wen-dogs behind him yelped as they were dragged along with him. He was still weak, but not so weak to be held back so easily. They had killed his sect disciples – Meng Yao had killed his sect disciples – and he had no reason to care for their safety. He would cut them all down if he could.

Meng Yao's face turned ashen, his eyes widening, and he moved to place the stone table between them. “Sect Leader Nie—”

The back of the collar, anchored by a newly grounded chain, gave an almighty tug that nearly sent Nie MingJue flying onto the flat of his back.

Letting out a wordless shout, Nie MingJue regained his footing. They tried to pull his arm back but he still grabbed the chain pulling on his neck. He was outnumbered but not outmatched, not by these lowly cultivators

“Please, Sect Leader Nie,” Meng Yao said, almost desperate. “You'll just tire yourself out. The outcome will be the same whether you fight or go calmly, won't it?”

“It won't!” Nie MingJue roared. The Wen-dogs behind him had pulled back again just as the ones holding his arms yanked him forward. The collar strangled over his windpipe, silencing him completely.

Footsteps shuffled and the Wen-dogs grunted and called orders to each other as they pulled him three difficult steps to where ropes and tethers and hooks hung from a low-set ceiling.

“Meng... Yao...!” Nie MingJue growled out, his lungs and chest on fire. His recovery had been less than perfect for this kind of full-body struggle.

And when the doors to the Fire Palace opened and a new audience swept in, Nie MingJue nearly yelled in frustration and his mind went blank with the need to fight for his life. Grabbing onto the chain pulling that arm, he yanked the Wen-Dogs towards him, ready to use them against their master just as he done the last time.

They let go of the chain immediately, perhaps realizing his intention. It still gave Nie MingJue a weapon to use as he panted for breath, eyeing Wen RuoHan for his next move.

There would be no summoning Baxia this time.

“You're right, Meng Yao,” Wen RuoHan said, his smile less than pleasant. “He has become quite lively now.”

The Wen-dogs restraining him didn't dare drop the chains, but the others had already bowed and remained kneeling.

Meng Yao, too, had gone to his master's side. All fear from earlier was gone. “Yes.”

“Doesn’t he need to be on hooks for your demonstration? Why is he standing in chains?”

“Excuse my incompetence, Sect Leader Wen. Sect Leader Nie refused the medicine. So, it has become like this.”

Wen RuoHan laughed. “You call it medicine now?”

Nie MingJue grated his teeth. The Wen-dogs holding him back yelped as Nie MingJue took a powerful step forward. “Meng Yao, you traitor!”

Meng Yao didn't even flinch. The Wen-dogs recollected themselves and yanked Nie MingJue back from Meng Yao and Wen RuoHan both. The collar crushed his Adam's apple, and the coughing fit forced him to a knee, his hair falling into his face as he bent over.

They reclaimed the chain he had stolen the moment his grip slacked and, in that a moment, Nie MingJue was back to how this all started: collared and chained and empty handed.

But instead of dragging him along as they had done, they all waited in place as Nie MingJue caught his breath.

He looked up to find Wen RuoHan watching him. With his head tilted in thought and a hand held to his chin and a knuckle brushing his lips. “If he has this much energy, it would be a waste to let him hang. He is quite able-bodied as well, under those Nie robes.”

“Sect Leader Wen?” Meng Yao asked, for the first-time showing signs of being at a loss.

Wen RuoHan swept his robes as he turned to leave the Fire Palace. “I’m returning to the Moon Palace. Bring him.”

Nie MingJue immediately dug his heels down, but Wen RuoHan was already looking back at him with laughter in his voice. Although he spoke to the room, his crimson eyes bore into Nie MingJue’s. “Oh. When he tries to resist, I'll take the chain myself.”

“That—” Meng Yao flustered, and he gave Nie MingJue an unreadable look. Whether it was the Sun Palace, the Fire Palace, or the Moon Palace, it made little different to Nie MingJue. He had no higher ground in this place. “That shouldn't be necessary. Sect Leader Nie is well aware that your strength far exceeds his own.”

“I know he does,” Wen RuoHan said dismissively, “but I also know all about this one.”

“Yes,” Meng Yao agreed, and Nie MingJue realized Meng Yao must have told Wen RuoHan everything. Everything about Hejian, about the Nie Sect, about their numbers, about their movements.

And about him.

Nie MingJue bristled at being talked about in this manner, but his anger clenched his hands and stayed his tongue. Meng Yao was beyond reason and Wen RuoHan had none to begin with.

In Wen RuoHan's wake, the Wen-dogs pulled Nie MingJue out the door into the blinding sunlight.

#my writing #heliocentric fic #ruojue #nie mingjue #wen ruohan #jin guangyao #i don't really want to character tags these but ahh #mdzs #whumptober2020 #fic #no. 2 #collars #threat of torture tw

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scandeniall · 4 years

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mirrors for friends //ch.2

| prev | next | masterlist

wc: 1180

pairing: TBD x reader

Ch. 2 // Here We Go

3 years ago

“Atsumu move your fat ass head,” you groan, shoving your band mate slightly to see the tiny phone screen Mirrors for Friends we’re currently gathered around. The 4 of you were currently gathered in Iwaizumi’s living room, attempting and failing to all squeeze onto a tiny loveseat. You had called dibs on the couch and since it was Iwaizumi’s place, that left the remaining two members on the floor.

“Your head’s fat”

“You two shut up and let’s watch my masterpiece come to life.” Kuroo stops the two of you before you could start your usual bickering. He also ignored your comment about how you definitely pitched in, instead opting to rest his head on your knee. On the screen was a recorded rehearsal for a new song, Here We Go. Written primarily by Kuroo, the song became an unspoken anthem for the band. It’s a song about pure passion for making music, and following this dream. A sentiment shared by the rest of you.

The song even throws a direct shot at your former band mate. Some guy you and Iwaizumi had met, who knows when. One day the two of you were just hanging out in a cafe and the next you thought you had a new friend. You guys thought he had been cool, and he was a pretty good singer. The four of you were already friends had just decided to combine your musical inclinations and form an official band. Not wanting to be the only one singing, you guys sought out another member and that turned out to be a huge mistake. While the rest of you were ready to put as much into this as you could,he was the only one not ready to take anything serious. Showing up late to practices, and when he did he had either been too high to function or so hungover that even the strum of an acoustic guitar “ruined his eardrums”. On the occasion he was a functioning member of the band, he’d always have something negative to contribute.

“This song sucks, who wrote it.”

“Iwaizumi, how are you so tired after playing drums? You're sitting down”

You constantly had to act as a buffer between the dude and Kuroo. After all, at that early point he had been the only one really writing the music. So to have his lyrics constantly nitpicked by some jerk who only contributed a few measly vocals, only for your benefit. Then Atsumu has been no better. His purposeful backhanded compliments had caused a physical fight on several occasions. That hand the fact that he didn’t even try to be nice to the guy. After all, this rando comes in and starts insulting his friends? Thank god for Iwa being able to calm the other guy down enough for you all to at least get something done.

That continued on for nearly a year, and by then you all had recorded several YouTube covers as well as like 2 originals in Iwaizumi’s basement and had started building a tiny following. The four of you still hung out together a ton and one day after your fifth member showed up to practice hungover and annoyed, all hell broke loose. It had started with a snide remark by atsumu about how it was nice that he’d finally showed up. An hour late. Somehow it got to the guy arguing about how you all took this shitty good for nothing band too seriously, and how you all were probably just having weird massive orgies whenever he wasn’t around. “This band is nothing but a joke. A stupid dream by a bunch of weirdos who aren’t going anywhere in life.” That day not only did you lose your fifth member, but he reignited the fire that had begun to dull in all of you. The four of you were going to make it.

The sound of pen rapidly scribbling across paper, broke you out of your study induced trance. Glancing, up you noticed the closed laptop and textbook from the man you’d come to the library with. “That doesn’t look like peptides and amino acids to me.” The first time you caught a glimpse of Kuroo’s course work, and you were completely confused. Hell, you still are, but you’d been around the guy long enough to know that the scribbled words right now looked nothing like his little molecular pictures you’d seen him make before.

“(Y/N), Come here for a second and take a look at this.” Kuroo hadn't even acknowledged your comment, so curiosity got the best of you. Closing your laptop, and abandoning your seat, you moved so that you were leaning over his shoulder, squinting at his handwriting. “What am I looking at, all I see is your chicken scratch.” The seriousness in his voice caught you off guard as he mentioned that they were lyrics.

This will always be mine, so much more than just a dream to me And I will never be fine with letting you ruin everything And I will never fucking follow your lead Give up on you, so you can take it out on me I'm sorry that you had to watch your life come tumbling down

“It's about us. The band, and how that asshole just tried to bring us down. I was thinking that might be a verse. Heavy guitar, maybe some type of solo back and forth with drums,” Kuroo hummed out eyeing your profile. “What do you think?”

“You know I already think you're a musical genius.” You shrug, turning so that the two of you make eye contact. The soft smile filters through his face before turning back into his usual lazy smirk. “Well of course I am. However, I have this riff in my head that I need to get out. You down for getting out of here?” You don’t miss the way his tongue quickly swipes across his lips before he breaks the eye contact and starts packing up his bag. “Yeah, lets go write a song.”

---

“We’re fucking awesome.” Atsumu said, the rest of you nodding in agreement. You all had broken into a quick debrief about the performance, everyone agreeing that Kuroo’s guitar work on the song was absolutely insane.”You guys are gonna make me cry,” the guitarist joked, soaking in the praise. Before you all added songs to your live shows you always did a video recording. You all would give it your all, performing as if it were an official show. That was how you gauged if a song would translate well live. Sometimes you all would have friends come by and watch those rehearsals, but now that everyone has grown up, it was much harder to do.

“This song almost feels like a theme song for us. Imagine we opened with it.” Iwaizumi added. “Good job writing this too Kuroo.”

“What can I say, I’m a musical genius-” he had been interrupted by your knee painfully coming into contact with his back. “I helped write the song too jackass.”

a/n: yeah i hope this structure is clear. still dont know which boy im gonna go with *though this chapter is kuroo leaning if u squint, but all the boys will get a leaning chap*. And, pls note that they've been a band for 6 years, but this song was written 3yrs ago and that is intentional. Also the song is Here We Go by sleeping with sirens yes.

#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu imagines #kuroo x reader #mirrors for friends #atsumu x reader #iwaizumi x reader

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oldies-enthusiast · 5 years

Text

She’s A Sensation: Ch. 1 | Marty McFly x reader

A/N: Hey guys! So basically, I’m in the middle of one of my many BTTF marathons & since I’m clearly In The Mood™️, I decided to bless your feed with some Marty McFly content.

The name of the band in this story is inspired by my favourite band, Psihomodo Pop from Zagreb, Croatia & their song Sexy Magazin.

Have a great day! —Ally xx

Chapter 2

For as long as you can remember, you’ve loved music with inexplicable passion. Some of your earliest memories involve blasting out The Sweet’s Ballroom Blitz on your old radio & jamming out to it with your dad. Your parents noticed you had talent when you would sing or hum absent-mindedly while dressing up your Barbie dolls or playing outside.

You got your first guitar at the age of 13, but your parents couldn’t afford guitar lessons as well. You spent that whole summer saving up for the lessons & finding all sorts of ways to make money, which sounds easier than it was for a 13-year-old, though. Most of the time you would walk dogs for other people, mow their lawns or babysit little kids when needed. Old ladies were especially fond of you & made sure to pay you a dollar or two extra when you carried groceries for them. It wasn’t the hardest work, but it definitely was a fair responsibility given how young you were.

On the other hand, you’d been dreaming of playing the guitar for years beforehand and that’s why you were so determined.

When the day of your first lesson arrived, you were ecstatic. Playing the guitar turned out to be a lot more difficult than you’d thought it was going to be, but your enthusiasm never subsided. It required talent, patience & hard work, and you had it all. You got better and better with each day.

Sophomore year of high school you made friends with some cool guys who liked punk and glam metal and you started playing together soon after. At first, it was only for fun. You would goof around on your instruments pretending you were Iggy Pop or Joan Jett; at parties people would sometimes ask you to play something & that was when you first realized that as a group, you sounded really good. By the end of the school year, you were officially a band.

Your main influences were the Ramones & Alice Cooper. First you started as a cover band and soon began to write and play your own stuff. You’d been searching for a proper band name for weeks before you agreed to be called Sexy Magazine. The main theme you represented combined proto-punk style with shock rock elements. What you actually were was intimidating, and that’s how you chose the name—you really wanted to shock people.

One morning, you saw the announcement for the rock band audition at your school. You knew that with the name you had and songs you played you wouldn’t even stand a goddamn chance. After all, the school was looking for a group that would play at the upcoming dance and there was no way in hell a bunch of punks singing taboo shit would win—which was exactly why you signed up. All four of you thought it would be hilarious to walk up on stage and see how long it would take the judges to cut off the ultimate atrocity that you were.

On the day of the audition, you arrived somewhat early because you wanted to take a look at other bands. While you were hanging around, checking out the music and waiting for your name to be called, some cute guy in denim brushed hurriedly past you, slipping his guitar strap over one shoulder and heading to the front. His bandmates were already onstage. He walked up to the microphone, cleared his throat and said:

“We’re, uh... We’re The Pinheads.”

The Ramones’ Pinhead immediately started playing in your head and within an instant, all your attention was on those guys.

You were surprised to find out they weren’t going to play any Ramones. Instead, they started playing a thing you quickly recognized—it was The Power Of Love by Huey Lewis & The News.

And actually, they sounded amazing.

If this was a fair, honest-to-God rock band audition, these guys would make for some serious competition, you thought to yourself.

To your complete and utter shock, the judge stood up with a loudspeaker and cut them off within the first guitar riff. You couldn’t believe your ears.

Too darn loud?? It was a rock band audition, for crying out loud! Since when’s rock ‘n’ roll supposed to be soft?

The guy in denim looked disappointed. He quickly gathered his stuff and descended.

You honestly felt sorry for them because they sounded great and didn’t even get a proper chance. After that, it was almost final: you weren’t going to make it past five seconds on that stage, but you decided to go for it anyway.

You had agreed to play a song you wrote together called The Midnight Hour, which was basically the Cinderella story full of more or less subtle dirty references. You did have butterflies in your stomach despite the fact that you were there just for kicks. But as soon as you grabbed the mic and started singing, the feeling faded away—it was like an instant transformation.

You didn’t even notice how far into the song you’ve come and before you knew it, it was over and people were cheering, their voices snapping you back to reality. You exchanged incredulous glances with your friends, your breath caught in your throat. Even the judges seemed impressed. In fact, you saw the one with the glasses whisper something to the guy next to him, who nodded and immediately turned to the rest of them.

You thought it was all a joke. You couldn’t believe they’d let you play in the first place! This was the exact opposite of what you’d planned on doing. As much as you hated to admit it, you felt a wave of excitement wash over you as you watched the audience applauding with joy.

You sticked around for a short while afterwards and pretty soon the judges arose from their seats and signaled for everyone to gather around. They’d apparently decided on the winner.

“All right, everybody. Thank you all for participating. Your effort is appreciated. To be fair, we had a tough time choosing among so many great groups...”

A couple of kids exchanged amused looks and you heard faint snickering somewhere behind you. This guy talked like he was an actual game show host. It was ridiculous.

“...Congratulations to...”, he trailed off, taking a breath. When he spoke at last, it seemed as though he didn’t say, but spat out: “Sexy Magazine!”

Your bandmates started laughing in disbelief. You couldn’t seem to wrap your mind around what had just happened.

We won? Us?! We are going to play at the dance?

A couple of kids came up to you to say congrats and tell you they’d really enjoyed the show. Some dude you recognized from earlier who looked as if he was high all of the time, the lead singer of some mediocre blues rock band, gave you a slow nod and a high-five and then proceeded to disappear somewhere in the crowd.

You turned around, searching the room for a specific face, but not his. You were trying to spot the one in denim, the Pinhead.

He was standing on the other end of the hall with his back to you, packing up his guitar. You pushed your way through the crowd, trying to reach him before he left. He unexpectedly turned around just as you were going to tap him on the shoulder.

“Hi”, you said, pulling your arm back.

He started, his brows furrowed. “Oh, uh... Hey.”

You wondered how come you hadn’t realized he had such beautiful eyes. Up close, he looked much more handsome than you’d thought at first.

“So, uh, I guess I just wanted to tell ya that I saw you play and you were really good. I mean, you sounded almost like Huey Lewis himself!”

You swore you saw a smile tugging at the corners of his lips as he scratched his head nervously, shifting from one foot to the other.

“Well, thanks, but, uh... We didn’t play much, to be fair.”

“I know! I was really pissed when they cut you off like that. And then they let us play!”

He smiled uneasily and you thought he didn’t believe you.

“I’m not trying to sell you that fake modesty bullshit, I really think you guys were awesome. I was so angry they made you stop before the first verse. I wish I’d been able to hear you sing.”

His smile now grew bigger and more sincere as he locked his eyes on yours.

“Thank you”, he said, “it really means a lot. And, well, uh, congrats to you... I mean, you rocked that stage for real!”

You chuckled, feeling your cheeks redden all of a sudden. “Thanks! My name’s [Y/N], by the way.”

He shook your hand with a grin. “Nice to meet you, [Y/N]. I’m Marty, Marty McFly.”

The warm look in his eyes made your heart flutter. He was clumsy in a cute sort of way. He’d almost dropped his guitar case when he took your hand, which made you both laugh awkwardly.

“I ought to join my friends now, but it’s been real nice talking to you. I guess I’ll see you around, then”, you said, trying to sound casual.

“Yeah, sure thing. Thanks again. See you around, [Y/N]!”, he smiled and waved before he left.

You turned slowly and walked back over to your bandmates, trying to hide how flustered you were. His eyes and his laugh were the only things you could think about at that moment.

Marty? Such a nice name...

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ranger-kellyn · 4 years

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11 Favorite Excerpts

In honor if it being the 11 year anniversary of the first fic I ever posted, Platinum Bound, I thought I’d list out 10 of my favorite excerpts from everything I’ve posted so far, 1 from something I haven’t posted yet, and then kind of just. Talk about it~

As always, feel free to talk to me about any of my fics, no matter how old or new~ I’m very vain~<3

1 - Come With Me - Prologue - 03/02/2015 - Completed

A day that was supposed to be filled with sorrow and mourning had turned out to be very lovely. The cold that had long persisted since November had decided to lighten its icy grip on this one day in particular. It was almost a tragedy in itself that the weather failed to match the mood by pouring a relentless downpour. Rain was fit for a funeral. Not sunshine.

The opening to Come With Me has always had a special place in my heart, and while I know my writing has gotten better since then, I always hold up this opening as like...my premium brand, I suppose. I love the mood the prologue sets up for Siebold’s side of the story. Mismatched weather. His parents having the same death date. A sense of odd relationship dynamics with them. Clear indication that there’s going to be a lot of conflict with Jean as shown by Diantha, Siebold’d childhood friend, who has a clear disdain towards him. CWM may not be my BEST WORK, but it’s probably one of my favorites. ALSO....come on...the restaurant’s name is Apple of The Earth, which is a direct translation of pomme de terre, which is French for potato. And like???? i just get a little kick out of it every time

2 - It Takes Two - 12/16/2014 - Oneshot

Siebold chuckled. “A water dark type? My, my. You’ve already put yourself at a disadvantage. Cress shook his head. “Don’t give away your secret ingredient just yet, Siebold. Leave something to the imagination, please,” he teased.

If there is ONE THING I LOVE it’s writing flirty banter for these two, and this fic if full of it. My first fic for Cress/Siebold, staking my claim on the pool noodle that is this ship. I AM the captain of this pool noodle

3 - Second Chances - Chapter 7 - 06/14/2017 - Ongoing

“It was supposed to be me!” . . . Shaking, she stopped herself in the front hallway. Looking over the large, glass-famed map, she felt as though she was leaving her own body as she slammed herself against it in a last ditch effort to feel something other than emotional pain. In an effort to put a physical wound to her emotional one.

There’s plenty of happier lines from this fic I could choose. Ch 10 had a section I was considering instead, but I think this emotionally charged section has always stood out for me. I like to generally characterize Cynthia as someone who is in control of her emotions, or at the very least, is very good at compartmentalizing things, but here, she absolutely loses it. No rationality. No seeking help. Just raw pain. It was supposed to be me. Because it was! It absolutely was! In the previous chapter you learn that Diantha had fully intended to propose to her! But was instead manipulated by her mother and manager into leaving Cynthia. While Cynthia didn’t know that, we do, and that makes that line so much more painful to me. I swear. ONE DAY. I’ll actually finish this fic.

4 - Fortune and Fame - Chapter 1 - 03/23/2016 - Completed

“The best part of that outfit would be taking it off.” Her mouth turns into a smile. “I should think so,” she tells you.

Second person POV is a HUGE pain in the ass, but I still love this silly little fic, and I love this silly little moment EVEN MORE. What can I say. I love flirty banter. This whole fic was an absolute experiment, and while it certainly could be better, considering 2POV is not something I regularly work with, I’ve never been too upset with it.

5 - Stockholm - Chapter 4 - 06/20/2016 - Ongoing

“You’re my mission and my mission alone. I don’t need outside help,” he tells me. I catch myself about to laugh. “Figured you would welcome it seeing as whatever you think you’re doing to me clearly isn’t working.” He moves closer, enough for me to feel the warmth of his body, but it’s only when I think he’s looking at my lips do I come to my senses, pulling my legs up to my person, and pushing back up against the wall. “I would say it’s working just fine.”

i like to think of this fic as me playing in a sandbox. i don’t REALLY know what i’m doing, but i’m having fun, and that’s all that matters. This is a fic I had been thinking about for the longest time. I abandoned it back in 2016. I don’t really remember why, but I posted the first update early this year, and I just. I’ve been loving it since. I haven’t played in first person in SUCH a long time, it’s just nice to play in the space, and explore a darker emotion I guess. Game verse Commander Saturn/Dawn is always a weakness of mine

6 - Shadows of My Heart - Chapter 4 - 02/22/2011 - Completed

Looking at Kellyn, I notice that he has taken his jacket off and is now offering it to me. Shaking my head, I tell him that I can't take it, even though I would love nothing more than to take him up on his offer. He walks closer, smiling as he places his jacket over me. Now, the only thing I hear is the sound of the rain bouncing off of Kellyn's jacket, and the sound my own heartbeat. I'd have to be crazy or dead to not be blushing right now, and obviously my pulse is still going…

if you’ve followed me for a few years, you might think this is a weird pick for me. i complain about it a lot. i experience a lot of visceral cringe whenever i reread it (Like i did just now searching for a section i liked) But that’s why I like it. I love having this visible benchmark of where I’ve come from, and where my ideals have shifted to. I’ve always written Kellyn as my Ideal Man™© and in this fic he is suCH A “NICE GUY” AND IT’S JUST. SO BAD. I’M SO GLAD I’M NOT WITH THE KIND OF PERSON I USED TO WISH I WAS WITH. This fic is, at best, clumsy. Younger me was venting a LOT of stuff. Everything I put Rhythmi through in the fic, I was dealing with irl, and NOT handling them well. I never recommend this for reading, but I list it here because it’s like looking in a time capsule.

7 - Washington Blues - Chapter 2 - 04/30/2012 - Abandoned Work

Looking back up at me, the afternoon sun shines on her face. As if I needed to be reminded that she is very pretty. “I believe that it is too soon to be giving a definite answer, but,” she pauses to brush some hair behind her ear, “I do believe I am going to like it here.” I nod, liking the answer she has provided. I put my pink bag over my shoulder, and step down the stairs. “That’s good to hear. I do hope you come to love our little band,” I say, putting a little emphasis on “our”. Hopefully she will start using that term as well.

This fic has been abandoned since 2012, but as I was rereading it just now, I...felt a weird urge to give it a second chance? Marching band was my EVERYTHING in high school. It was basically my personality. It and Homestuck. If nothing else, I think I might give this fic a redo, because it’s something my younger self would have loved. I had so many ideas I wanted to explore and I think it would be a fun space to explore. Just reading it I got the most tactile memories of band camp, from the sounds, all the way down to the god awful smells. One day I’ll give this fic another go, but probably in 3rd person lmao. Also, it’s kind of funny. I remember holding this fic up as like. My Magnum Opus. I considered chapter 1 to be the BEST thing I had written up to that point. Now? It’s so fucking D RY......and no real person talks like they all do l m a o I love being able to see how far I’ve come.

8 - Hindsight - Sometime Feb 2014? - Oneshot for an old RP group

This question led him to placing both of his hands in his lap. “I would never describe her as winter. It’s the season she hates the most. From what I’ve gathered during our travels together, understandably so,” he answered, not meeting her eyes.

While this fic is OLD it holds a very special place in my heart. I had stopped writing for a while. For about 2 years nothing I wrote ever really panned out, and joining that RP group was literally the best thing I could have done for my creativity. It was so much fun, and I met some truly incredible people thanks to it. Literally, everything I’ve written since I attribute to that group. <3 I may not talk to most of them anymore, but I have some of the best memories of that time, and I just. Genuinely don’t think I would have HALF of what I have written now if it hadn’t been for their support. <3

9 - Ours For The Taking - Chapter 2 - 01/28/2012 - Abandoned Work

Killing is in the nature of almost every Pokémon, but we humans have inhibited that out for the most part. It doesn't take much to trigger the instinct though. A couple kills and then they thirst for blood.

Now i know this looks like a WACK ASS PICK. It’s been abandoned since 2012. It’s bad. It’s gore. It’s bad. But that’s exactly why I picked it. That, and I know it would chap Farla’s ass bc she told me years ago how awful this fic was. The whole reason my writing confidence took a blow. I can look back and know that this fic wasn’t great, but I hate for my younger self that they were knocked down like that. You can’t learn the boundaries of your writing until you try to push them. Maybe I could have turned into a great gore/horror writer if I hadn’t been knocked down? Who knows? But because of that negative experience, I now approach all comments I leave on fics with “unconditional positive regard”. I firmly believe if someone wants con-crit they’ll ask for it, and even then, I’m not someone who is going to offer up that criticism. That’s not my jam. I’m just here for a good time. This fic may be bad, but that’s why I love it. I love how over the top, 2Edgy4me the two chapters are.

10 - Getaway Car - Chapter 5 - 01/01/2019 - Ongoing

Pulling away just enough to make them look at one another, Cynthia looked her over. She was getting more drunk admissions than she ever thought she would, and she was in no frame of mind to worry about pushing her luck. “How did that make you feel?” she asked. She let her hand trail down her arm as she spoke. “Grounded. Like nothing else in the world mattered except us in that moment. I wasn’t worried about filming, deadlines, what people might say or think, or– anything, really. All that mattered was the calm you brought me, and how without meaning to you’ve made me feel like the most important person in the room.”

It’s no secret that Getaway Car is like. MY BABY. This is MY FIC. MY BABY. I CHERISH THIS FIC FOR SO MANY REASONS. I like venting through characters, and this fic is no exception. But I loved writing this moment specifically, because it just...I think it encapsulates everything Diantha has been looking for. She lives a charmed, chaotic life. Up to that point in the fic, she’s with a man who can’t really be bothered to give her the time of day, but also can’t handle the idea of letting her go. Without meaning to, without necessarily trying to, Cynthia makes her feel like the most important person in the room. She grounds her, and someone who lives a star-studded life needs that. This fic is my baby. My everything. It’s probably what I’m known for at this point, and I’m A-OK with that because these two are my everything. (ALSO, I specifically posted this fic when I did to get Farla to leave me a review, and had a good laugh about it when she did. My “bat shit crazy” plot device has ended up being my most popular fic~)

11 - Namtaflu - Chapter _ - Draft from NaNoWriMo 2019

The sound of something rising to the surface of the water attracted everyone’s attention. Turning their eyes towards the water, one by one, countless Starmie and Staryu began to surface, floating atop the water, their bright gem center’s shining in the moonlight. “Oh, wow,” Bianca said, holding the Audino closer to herself. "What are they doing?” Hilbert asked, turning himself so he wasn’t having to strain to look at them. Cheren shrugged. “They’ve always done this.” "They’re looking at the stars,” Hilda added. “It’s what Nona would always tell me. She said she read it in a book somewhere. They surface at night to look at the stars, and they’ll even start blinking here soon.” As she said it, from out in the distance, quick flashes of red began to move along the waves, reminding both her and Cheren of fireflies from further south. Soon enough, the entire shoreline was filled with the water pokémon blinking away at the stars, almost as if they were communicating with each other, or even something else. A few Audino continued to sit with them, everyone moved to silence by the display, afraid to make a single noise, not wanting to scare them at all and make them stop. The display moved in waves, like a heartbeat, ebbing and flowing. At times they were bright enough to cast a glow onto the shore, and at others it seemed like they had collectively stopped for the night. Once Broadway and Manhattan had decided to retire for the night, the group came to an agreement that it was time they retired for the night as well. They had stayed up long past sundown, but it had been worth every second.

I won’t be posting this fic WELL until my three current ongoing fics are completed, but this fic is pretty much everything to me. I first got the idea for this fic back in 2013, my senior year of high school. I wrote the first draft my first NaNoWriMo in 2014, and did a second draft of it last year. This fic has evolved SO MUCH, but this last draft is where I’m REALLY happy with it. I firmly believe there’s never a “right time” to write a fic, but I also believe this fic absolutely benefited from me not posting it after that first draft. They’re almost two entirely different stories. The original had a lot of unhealthy relationship dynamics, and this time, i decided, FUCK THAT, and now it’s a hilda/hilbert/cheren/bianca poly fic ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ I can’t wait for the day when I actually get to share this fic with the world.

#writing tag #my fics #i spENT ALL DANG DAY ON THIS

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vinspiration-book · 5 years

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Son of Palaven, Daughter of Earth Playlist

Based on the story by miceenscene

Story Here

Spotify Playlist Here

Playlist Status: Synced up to ch. 47

This wonderful piece of fanfiction inspired me to create a soundtrack for it. Here is a track listing and some thoughts about each piece. I try to pick thematic tracks for each story beat, while still retaining a rhythm between each song.

1. The Arranged Marriage - Gavin Luke

An instrumental piece by film composer Gavin Luke is the overture. Anxious and urgent, it depicts a quiet, unhappy uncertainty that is nevertheless peppered by bright chords. Combined with the name, it sets the tone for Shepard and Garrus’ unwilling journey into matrimony.

2. I Still Taste Fire - Stephanie Mabey

“I woke up with ashes in my mouth”

Shepard’s beginning theme. A dark and driving song of regret and grit. Shepard feels that she, Flaming Death, has personally lost the war and didn’t even get to see the ending. The line “Thought I'd always remember what it felt like / To want you / But it's all kind of hazy now / Almost like I burned it down” normally refers to a lover, but in Shepard’s case, the “you” is an end to the war that she thought she wanted. Now that the price of peace is her freedom, it's a bitter thing to swallow.

3. This Means War - Marianas Trench

“I hate to admit it but I miss the war”

Garrus’ beginning theme. Whereas Shepard’s song was all seriousness and loss, Garrus can never quite be 100% sass-free. So we get this jocular tune about having to play nice with someone even though you’d rather be fighting them.

4. Can’t Be Tamed - Miley Cyrus

“If you try to hold me back I might explode”

The wedding: Shepard’s view. Deep in enemy territory, forced to participate in a ritual meant to demean her and her species, Shepard is nevertheless putting on a fierce display, just like the brash attitude of this number. The irony of the song is that the singer keeps repeating over and over how she can’t be tamed; almost as if no one believes her? Also includes the line “I'm like a puzzle / But all of my pieces are jagged” which has a double meaning that ties in to the story: as Garrus says much, much later both literally and metaphorically, “[A puzzle] is the best thing you could have gotten me”.

5. Love Runs Out - OneRepublic

“I'll be doin' this, if you ever doubt, / 'Til the love runs out”

The wedding: Garrus’ view. Is this a romantic song, or a resigned one? Or is it duplicitous? Garrus may be a bad turian, but he’s still obedient to the Hierarchy, even if it’s only going through the motions and hoping for an escape. The driving punch of the bass notes echoes this sentiment in a song that could be read as either loving commitment or bitter commitment. It contains a lot of fire imagery too, especially the singer being someone to help someone else start a fire… perfect for being tied to Flaming Death. The song also mentions an (arch?)angel and the strong influence of the singer’s mother, both of which are important to the story.

6. Poker Face - Lady Gaga

“Russian Roulette is not the same without a gun”

Spying: Shepard’s view. So Shepard and Garrus only ever play a board game in this story rather than poker, but come on. It’s Poker Face. It’s the best song ever about selfishly conning your partner to further your own high-stakes goals.

7. Fraud - Jonathan Coulton

“Sharp teeth test your skin / Too late, you let an angel in”

Spying: Garrus’ view. This song takes a more meditative approach to being disingenuous, but just about every verse is packed with imagery that pairs perfectly with the story, from unwanted houseguests, to painting, fighting, and losing. The refrain is even about an angel with fangs!

8. Didn’t Know You - Karmin

“Like a bird of prey / Out of nowhere you came / Do you always get your way?"

The reports: Shepard’s view. An angry song about being the victim of deception and invasive tactics. The singer talks especially about upending their entire life (setting “dreams ablaze”--fire imagery again) for the sake of someone who turned out to be a liar that controls their every move. Turians are sometimes referred to as “birds” as a pejorative in Mass Effect, making the repeated line fit even more.

9. Can’t Go to Hell - Sin Shake Sin

“This romance with ignorance has left us behind”

The reports: Garrus’ view. Unlike Shepard’s reaction to finding the reports--which is very much about personal betrayal--Garrus’ reaction is a more public outcry about the situation going FUBAR. One of the central tenets in ME canon about Shepard and Garrus’ relationship (to the point that even the characters themselves talk about it in these terms) is that he willingly follows her into hell every single time. This makes the bitter anger of the chorus (“We can’t go to hell if we’re already there”) especially poignant. The second verse evokes Shepard and Garrus’ situation closely too, mentioning being “blind by design” and stating “...history keeps getting paid to change its mind”, which is the purpose of the arranged marriage in the first place.

10. Home - Machine Gun Kelly & X Ambassadors

“Now tell me, how did all my dreams turn to nightmares?”

Shepard and Garrus: no extraction. A rare male/female duet of frustration and longing for respite that neatly applies to the protagonists’ mindsets. Both Anderson and the Hierarchy have turned away their soldiers, leaving them in this untenable situation. Though they arrived at it differently--and aren’t commiserating at this point--Shepard and Garrus are feeling the same thing now: They must continue to live together, but there’s no way this life can bring them any happiness or rest.

11. Hide and Seek - Imogen Heap

“Speak no feeling, no, I don't believe you”

Shepard is broken, and so is Garrus, a little. This haunting acapella song (delivered in dual-toned overdub kind of like how a turian speaks, interestingly) was famously used by a TV drama for an overly dramatic murder scene, and then used again by Saturday Night Live to spoof that scene. But Hide and Seek is technically about a divorce… and how a former home now becomes unrecognizably empty as the former couple moves out and apart. Although they can’t separate, this is essentially what has happened to Shepard and Garrus. Shepard tries to “live” as little as possible in the house while still being confined to it. Garrus tries to escape to work.

12. Rumble - Hi Fashion

“He said, she said / You better mind your space”

The alley brawl. A complete turnaround from the previous song, this abrupt battle anthem (sung by dual tones again, and with a notable mention of a man and a woman both throwing the punches) is both high-energy, but also a slower tempo than you’d expect. The effect is that of measured, precise violence rather than a chaotic frenzy; perfect for trained soldiers giving a beatdown. Canon Shepard gets ribbed for being an awful dancer--outside of the battlefield, at least, giving an ironic twist to the dance imagery in the lyrics. But this is technically the first time in the story that Shepard and Garrus are in sync: their first metaphorical dance together.

13. Hammer to Fall - Queen

“Tow the line and play their game / Yeah, let the anesthetic cover it all”

Medigel. This story's version of Shepard loves Queen, and this song provides the title for the story’s later chapters, so it had to be on the soundtrack of course. A disillusioned anthem to soldiers who are asked to fight wars for reasons someone else decided, it describes Shepard and Garrus’ situation perfectly--their lives have been ruined because of Fedorian’s unjust war. Even though this is a small snippet of background to the story, it’s nevertheless a critical turning point, when Garrus realizes just how badly Shepard has been wronged… and that he himself contributed to it.

14. Karma - Marina

“So vicious, this cycle / When you live in sweet denial”

The apology: Shepard’s view. Garrus apologies to Shepard, but she doesn’t know how to take it. She’s skeptical, and with good reason. Although this song is talking about a great deal of betrayal, the tone is less angry--or even melancholy--than weary and aloof. The singer has made what peace she can with the situation, and is just waiting to see how everything plays out, rather than actively wishing harm on someone. Karma is usually about an equal return of bad experiences, but Shepard is too defeated at this point to really care about that. Garrus’ distress at his actions is actually better karma than if he himself were to be betrayed.

15. I Won’t Let You Down - OK Go

“Maybe all you need is someone to trust”

The apology: Garrus’ view. Garrus is a man of action, and this upbeat track wastes no time in sorrow, instead attempting to reach out to the wounded party with a direct promise of support. The lyrics talk about people who have every right to be distrustful, even using battle imagery (“no flag to fly”, “strap that armor tighter on”)... but rather than trying to get past their defenses, the singer encourages the downtrodden to fight harder--together. A very Garrus point of view.

16. Rumors - Lindsay Logan

"You're probably gonna write what you didn't see”

The interview. Ah, Khalisah. A pretty straightforward song about paparazzi doing what paparazzi do, sung by the aggrieved celebrity.

17. One Shot - Rob Thomas

"We get one chance to make this kickstart”

Bottle shooting at the valley. While Shepard and Garrus fire a lot of rounds during this little date, it's the final shot that's the most important. Garrus' previous actions since their fight have been peace offerings, but this is his first actual gift to Shepard. He gives Shepard his crown just to see her smile. Essentially, his first romantic gesture is literally “one shot”. The sentiment pairs perfectly with this energetic tune about starting something rare and good.

18. Souvenir - Johnnyswim

“It's those little things that I hold dear”

Terra Goods. At this point, Shepard and Garrus are starting to do things to really support each other in little ways and in big ways, culminating in Garrus creating a whole souvenir trading company just to make Shepard happy. This song, a duet that alternates between jaunty and staid, talks about a couple that had a brief good time, then separated due to some unnamed conflict. Now they both think fondly of their time together, making souvenirs of the memories. Both singers individually wish for another chance, while not realizing the other person does too.

19. DJ Got Us Fallin’ In Love - Usher, Pitbull

“I think I remember those eyes”

Clubbing with Solana. This throbbing dance tune is simple enough that even Shepard could probably keep to the beat. Seeing Shepard (attempting to) dance is one of the first moments where Garrus is physically attracted to her.

20. Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen

“Easy come, easy go / Little high, little low”

The walk back. Shepard sings this most famous Queen song as she stumbles home under Garrus’ watchful eye. It describes a murderer with a guilty conscience, which Shepard is somewhat. She’s killed a lot of turians, but now they are people to her instead of monsters. Shepard probably isn’t thinking about that, though… it’s just a fun song to sing when you’re drunk. Or anytime.

21. Livin’ in the Sunlight, Lovin’ in the Moonlight - The Good Johnsons

“I’m right here to stay”

Splashing in the fountain. This whimsical cover of an old song is just silly enough for Shepard’s drunken water foray. Although it’s been building for a bit, it takes hard liquor for Shepard to admit she might be happy on Palaven. But there’s a slight undercurrent of the singer not believing their own message. The line “I’m as free as any daughter” is especially ironic in this context.

22. Mom - Meghan Trainor

“Ain’t nobody got a mom like mine”

Visiting with Galena. Shepard’s relationship with Garrus’ mother is one of my favorite parts of the story, and it’s one of the things that cements Shepard’s feeling that she may just belong here. It’s also significant that even though Shepard is starting to love Garrus, she can only express love towards his mother at first. In a way, loving Galena teaches Shepard how to love Garrus. Hence why this story beat gets its own song.

23. With A Little Help From My Friends - The Beatles

“Are you sad because you're on your own?”

The care package. Finally, Shepard finds out that Earth hasn’t completely abandoned her. This song especially talks about isolation when your lover is not there, and how friends can help you through it. When Garrus isn’t there, Shepard is almost totally alone on the planet, so learning her squad still supports her is a huge relief.

24. Tongues - Joywave, KOPPS

“Tell me all the things I've missed”

Ashley. This furtive song is about returning to where you are from, only to find out you are now a stranger to them. While Shepard’s argument with Ashley is a little more circumspect than that, the gist is that Shepard learns that even though she now has this lifeline back to Earth, she’s not welcomed like she was before… which is just what she has been fearing since her interview with Khalisah.

25. Unbreakable - Jamie Scott

“I won't let you fall down now”

Garrus comforts Shepard and comes to a realization. This song of gentle encouragement talks about a woman who has lost everything, and the man who wants to love her regardless. It’s emotive and warm and seems to capture just what Garrus is thinking as Shepard cries in his arms.

26. War Paint - Fletcher

“I write the colors on my face”

The dress shop. Keslia describes the Gala being a battle, and Shepard’s dress being her armor. This song of self-empowerment uses loads of battle imagery and works in tandem with the previous one… Shepard’s been wounded emotionally but she’s still fighting. Turians’ face markings have important meaning for family and home. But for humans, the same sort of marks are called war paint and are used by warriors to represent ferocity and power. Shepard turns an outfit that could just make her into the ornament that the turians want and turns it into a symbol of her survival.

27. Ballroom Blitz - Tia Carrere

“She could kill you with a wink of her eye”

The Gala, part 1. A fun cover of an energetic song talking about a crazy party fight. Between the turian generals and Cyntha, Shepard and Garrus really do have a battle on their hands. While nothing violent actually happens, they have each other’s backs throughout the event, even standing up solo versus their partner’s enemies.

28. Blue Dress - Benjamin Franklin Leftwich

“I should love you better than that”

The Gala, part 2. Shepard asks Garrus if her presence is harming his career, but he doesn’t reply. This song is meant to be the answer he doesn’t say. It’s an apology from a man whose work/travel has prevented him from participating in a relationship like he should. Interestingly, in ME canon, it’s the opposite: the Shadow Broker notes that Garrus’ attachment to Shepard prevents him from being a better commander. The line “But still my only weakness / Is you baby in that blue dress” fits nicely with the story, but funnily enough also with canon… as blue is the color of the Alliance uniforms that canon Shepard typically wears.

29. Vie En Rose - Pomplamoose

“It’s only him for me / and me for him, for life”

Dancing in the driveway. This version of Shepard speaks French, so this slow, lilting, classic French love song is what I imagine coming out of the car stereo when Garrus teaches Shepard to dance. Ok, so it’s probably more likely a turian song playing in this scene, but still. I especially like the stanza that says “He speaks words of love to me / They are everyday words / And they do something to me” because unlike canon, where Shepard and Garrus’ bond is forged in battle, in this AU it’s built from all the little everyday things they say and do for each other.

30. Bad Liar - Selena Gomez

“If you're the art, I'll be the brush”

Painting. Shepard and Garrus made that “100%” promise, but when it comes to feelings, they don’t exactly follow through. This breathy song is about admitting--at least to yourself--that you were denying your emotions, and that your love interest seems to be as well. Not that Shepard is clued in enough to realize Garrus feels the same way, but putting together the easel with Garrus also helped Shepard put together why she’s reacting to him the way she is. Once again, they are in sync without realizing it, the dorks. This song also contains numerous lines that fit the story nicely, such as talking about living arrangements, the battle of Troy (and isn’t that just the funniest view of Shepard’s infiltration of Palaven), and “feelings on fire”.

31. Anne of Green Gables - The Charlottetown Festival

“Anne of Green Gables, sweet and strange, / stay as you are today.”

Reading to Galena. Oh, boy, here we go. Get those tissues ready, it’s coming soon. This simple song from the Anne of Green Gables musical doesn’t say much, but it has a sorrowful timbre that speaks of heartache to come.

32. I Think I Love You - The Partridge Family

“Do you think I have a case? Let me ask you to your face”

Happy Anniversary! In canon and most fanon, Garrus is slick as oil until comes to telling Shepard how he feels, and then he gets adorably pitiful and nervous. While at this point in the story, Garrus himself is probably not ready to call it “love”, this anxiety-ridden song still captures that fragile state of mind. Sadly, Garrus gets interrupted before he makes it as far as the singer does in his confession.

33. Galena - Kerri Sherwood

Galena’s passing. Did you know there are a lot of songs called “Galena”? But though I searched and searched--and quite a few of them were sad songs--none of them had the right words. Because there aren’t any right words for this, are there? And so, a solemn, sad instrumental piece describes Galena’s last day.

34. In My Arms - Plumb

“All I can do is hold you tight”

Garrus’ breakdown. This song is from a mother who wants to protect her child from the harshness of the world. But Garrus’ mother is gone, so Shepard has to sing it instead. Growing up is hard, and the very last and hardest part of growing up for most people is losing your parents. As a side note, the song starts by mentioning blue eyes--one of Garrus’ most notable features.

35. Calling All Angels - Jane Siberry, k.d. lang

"Don’t leave me alone"

The Vigil, part 1. A song imploring various spirits and saints to help guide you through a trying time. On Palaven, where they ask the Spirits’ help for everything, this would probably be especially appropriate. Granted, this song gets used in A LOT of soundtracks, but that’s because it’s so perfect for when you’ve lost someone. More than just loss, this song also says that you know life will go on... but those first steps afterwards are the hardest. It’s like the MVP of movie funeral songs, and Galena deserves the best, dammit.

36. Hope Will Lead Us On - Barlow Girl

"Become the flame / That shows us the way"

The Vigil, part 2. Shepard steps up wonderfully for the Vakarian family and helps them heal. This song, sung almost from a sort of battle commander’s perspective, mixes strong, driving beats with inspiring statements… while still having an underlying piano refrain that is haunting and forlorn. It doesn’t try to move past the pain, but rather keeps it as a foundation for a new beginning.

37. That’s How You Know - Amy Adams, from “Enchanted”

"It's not enough to take the one you love for granted"

Operation Two Turtle Doves. Shepard’s getting ready to meddle with Solana’s love life. So we have a cute song from a cute movie on that very topic. I wish the pronouns were correct for a wlw relationship like in the story, but what can ya do. The line “Don’t treat her like a mind reader” made me laugh, because… Keslia literally is one, being an asari and all.

38. Can’t Help Falling In Love - Elvis Prestley

"Shall I stay?"

Kissing in the study. One of my favorite parts of the story… a tired kiss that’s all about love and comfort rather than passion. When Shepard and Garrus are both drained emotionally and physically from the Vigil, all that’s left is a quiet gravity that draws them together. There are many versions of this song, but Elvis’ gentle crooning rendition is all about slow movements and tender questions.

39. Love Of My Life - Queen

“You don’t know what it means to me”

Singing to babies. Shepard’s still singing Queen, so here is her next solo. This is such a heartwarming scene, plus we get a bit of sibling slapstick for a laugh. The funny part is that even though Shepard is the one singing this song to the babies, the lyrics are really describing what Garrus is feeling in this scene. It works as a cute lullaby, in the way that lullabies often are kind of dark for some reason.

40. Heaven Is A Place On Earth - Belinda Carlisle

"When I feel alone, I reach for you / And you bring me home"

Going to Earth. There Garrus goes again with the grand gestures. Not just anybody can say they gave their partner the world. As much as this Shepard likes Queen, I bet she also likes other 80��s classics like Belinda Carlisle. This song represents Shepard’s response to Garrus’ gift.

41. Girl On Fire - Alicia Keys

“Everybody stands, as she goes by / Cause they can see the flame that's in her eyes”

Arriving at Earth. This song is meant to be from Garrus’ perspective, seeing Shepard in her natural habitat, and is particularly inspired by the story’s description of Shepard being “swallowed by sunlight” as she leaves the ship...which would make her look like she was on fire. It’s a song of admiration and wonder over the power of this one woman who stands out from everyone else. P.S. Did anyone else imagine the spaceship was the Normandy, even though it wasn’t? I did.

42. Wannabe - Spice Girls

“If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends”

The Squad. Ok, so this song is not serious at all, but Shepard’s squad are a bunch of goofballs anyway. Although at this point Shepard probably wouldn’t tell Garrus goodbye if he bugged her like the song mentions, she does state that it means a lot to her that Garrus makes friends with her group.

43. Where Everybody Knows Your Name - Gary Portnoy

I initially added this song for Hudson’s, as it’s the theme song from the sitcom Cheers, which is all about this type of bar. HOWEVER, there are verses in the full song that you never hear in the tv show, including one that’s a bit of toxic masculinity bordering on transphobia. So, this song can just go in the trash where it belongs.

43. Home - Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros

“Home is wherever I’m with you”

The broken nose. Shepard’s gotten another reminder that she doesn’t quite belong on Earth anymore… but that ends up being okay, because Garrus is her home now. This fun duet talks about how even if you travel and have a variety of experiences, you can find that the person you shared it with is what’s really important. This is in direct contrast to the song of the same name earlier in the playlist, which talked about needing Home to be an actual place. In the middle of the song is a spoken-word section about the man realizing he’s in love with the woman only when she gets injured… which is so Shepard and Garrus it’s funny. I thought for a long time that the woman’s name in the song was “Jane,” which would have made an even better fit, but it turns out it’s “Jade”. Ah well.

44. Soft Kitty, Warm Kitty - Chris & Pui

“Purr, purr, purr”

Mr. Biscuits. A children’s lullaby about cats napping and purring. The main verse mentions London, which is just a coincidence as a significant location for canon Shepard & Garrus. But really I just wanted a song that Shepard could tease Garrus with.

45. I Want To Break Free - Queen

“I've fallen in love for the first time / And this time I know it's for real”

Operation I Want To Break Free. Another of Shepard’s Queen-inspired choices that of course had to be on the soundtrack. This rock anthem has several elements that apply to the story, including falling in love in a strange circumstance, and trying to escape from an oppressive situation. The song is not necessarily addressed to the singer’s lover though, so the “you” referenced is more likely the outside oppressor. As Shepard is planning this operation without Garrus’ help, it would make sense that this not song is speaking to him directly.

46. Aurora Borealis - Bohnes

“I saw with my own eyes something beautiful”

Seton Lake: Garrus’ view. This location actually exists in real life and is worth googling an image of! This breathy ballad is an ode to love that is as sublime and ineffable as the northern lights. With lyrics that talk about stellar phenomena and our place in the universe, it’s especially poignant for lovers from different planets. The line about “a beautiful coincidence that causes love” also fits pretty well, since the arranged marriage turning to love was all unplanned. There’s also a line, “the world inside your eyes is more than black and white to me,” and one of Garrus’ most famous lines in canon is about how he’s unsure how to operate outside of black and white morality… but as it turns out, when it’s Shepard, he’s okay with it.

47. I Choose You - Sara Bareilles

“I believe in something again”

The Mark. While this chapter is explicit, it’s also really charming, humorous, and emotional. So this light and breezy song about choice and beginnings fits well as Shepard’s perspective. This story is largely about Shepard having her autonomy taken from her, with the course of her entire life decided by others. But when she is finally in a position to do something about it--and when Garrus even offers her an out--she chooses him. The song mentions outside influences trying to convince the singer that her love is impossible or wrong, which is again something that Shepard has had to deal with. But Shepard now willingly accepts the mark from Garrus that she once rejected… As the song says, the mark is a visible symbol that will “Tell the world that we finally got it all right”. The line “I will become yours and you will become mine” sounds like a wedding vow, which seems especially appropriate.

[TO BE CONTINUED]

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outerspaceisbetterthannothing · 6 years

Text

Stuck with me [Ashton Irwin] Ch.2

playlist

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

Summary: Can a sudden meeting really change your life for the better? Or will it be just another mistake they made?

A/N: Soz it took so long, but I’m really happy to be back on track. And I’m also happy with these two dorks here. They are adorable. The feedback is extremely appreciated. Enjoy

Warnings: none, apart from a little sadness

Chapter 2

“So, how exactly are we going to get inside?” Ashton asked after couple of minutes.

Y/N sighed heavily.

They were sitting in his black pontiac not far from the place she only yesterday could call home. Her eyes were glued to the entrance, waiting and praying, that her ex’s lazy ass will get out soon enough. His car was parked right in front of the building, so she was pretty sure he was still inside. And having close to no wish to see Josh ever again, she asked Ashton to wait till he would go somewhere. Despite an early hour, they could already feel the heat of another sunny day in LA. Y/N sighed again.

“I know where he keeps the spare key,” she confessed, feeling Ashton looking at her.

Ashton sniffed, but didn’t say anything. They drowned in silence again. It wasn’t heavy silence, but Y/N would lie if she said it wasn’t an awkward one.

Ashton turned on the radio and started going through the stations, but after five minutes or so he turned it off again.

“So, what do you do?” Y/N asked and snorted right after those words left her mouth.

Ashton looked at her, quirking his eyebrow quizzically.

“I’m sorry,” she said, still giggling a little. “Thought that I’ve already agreed to kinda live with you and only now started asking questions. And, I mean, with my luck, chances are you’re in a gang or something.”

“That would be not very good for you,” Ashton muttered, amused more by her nervous giggling than the fact that in her imagination he could end up being in a gang.

“So, what do you do for a living?” she asked again after calming down.

“I’m a musician,” he stated simply and earned another look of surprise.

“Musician?”

“Well, yeah.”

Y/N moved in her seat to face him, though still having the entrance in her peripheral, and asked again, her words full of doubt, “No, wait, like real musician getting paid for his music or like every second guy in LA who isn’t an actor?”

Ashton laughed, quite surprised by her remark and how fair it really was.

“No, first option,” he answered. “I’m actually in a band.”

“What kind of band?” she asked, hardly capable to keep her interest at bay.

“Well, you’ve probably heard of us,” Ashton said, looking away from her and getting slightly uneasy all of a sudden. He totally forgot the feeling of that moment, telling somebody about his work and the band, too used to people knowing his name and almost everything that was behind it. “5 seconds of summer?”

He felt with his skin the awkwardness of that moment. She looked at him amused, shaking her head a little. “Never heard,” Y/N admitted easily and then added, “but I’m not into music, I never remember band’s names. So what kind of music do you play? Are you a guitarist or something?”

“I’m a drummer,” Ashton chuckled. From all the girls in this city he found the one who’s never heard about him. How little was the chance, really? “As for what kind of music, well, kinda pop-rock maybe. I don’t even know, that’s a hard question, we try not to narrow ourselves with specific genres, to be honest.”

He looked back at her, she was puzzled, but still interested.

“Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have megalomania or something, but you must have heard at least some of our songs,” he said with yet another chuckle.

Y/N just shrugged. “I don’t really care about music,” she explained. “Anything that plays on the radio or at a party is good enough for me.”

“Unbelievable,” Ashton rumbled, getting his phone out and going through his spotify. Couple moments later first sounds of She Looks So Perfect filled the car.

Y/N kept her eyes on the phone in Ashton’s hand. Soon she was nodding her head to the beat, a ghost of a smile on her lips. “Not bad,” she said halfway through the song, “but never heard it before.”

“You have to be kidding me,” Ashton almost groaned, tapping on another song.

When you're talking to your girls, do you talk about me? Luke and Mike started the verse. Ashton fixed his eyes on the girl in his passengers seat, who was smiling at him and shaking her head in silent apology.

“Come on! It was the soundtrack for the Ghostbusters remake!”

“I don’t watch remakes,” she winced.

“Is it some kind of a life philosophy?” Ashton couldn’t hold back and laughed.

“You can say so, I guess,” she agreed. “They’re just never as good as the original. But the song is cool.”

Ashton huffed. Now it was a challenge. They did joke about being the biggest band nobody heard about, but… If Ashton was completely honest, he always took it as a joke and joke only. He scrolled up through the list of their songs and tapped on another one.

Remember the words you told me "Love me 'til the day I die"

“Oh,” she ushered with a look of genuine surprise on her face, “I’ve heard this! I’ve definitely heard this, at a bar, I think! So it’s your song? That’s sick!”

“Tell me about it,” Ashton laughed again at her excitement.

“So how did you make it to the big scene?” Y/N asked, giving a building in front of them another worried look. She knew they couldn’t sit here the whole day.

“Well, we’re from Australia,” Ashton started.

“I thought, I heard the accent, just couldn’t figure it out,” Y/N said, smile still on her face.

“Yeah, we left home long ago,” he nodded. “So we kinda started pretty young, got some fans there, then moved to London, got to tour with 1D. Have you at least heard about One Direction?” he mocked her, quirking an eyebrow again.

“Yes, I have, mister Music. They are a boyband, right?”

“Yeah, so we toured with them for some time, then released couple of pretty successful albums. That’s like long story short.”

Y/N nodded. The rest of the album came after Youngblood, and Ashton turned on his phone again to stop the music, but she stopped him almost intuitively, lightly brushing her hand against his. He looked at her, stunned with this contact. And ten hours ago she couldn’t even speak to him. But Y/N didn’t notice the surprise in his eyes, her attention at the building again.

“So, your band is like 1D?” she asked a moment later.

“No, we’re different. And we’re better,” Ashton answered with a smug smile.

Y/N turned to him again, amused with such a bold answer. “How so?”

“We’re still together,” he stated.

“1D aren’t together anymore?”

Ashton burst out laughing at the exasperated look on her face. She couldn’t fake it even if she tried. “You’re unbelievable,” he repeated.

Y/N rolled her eyes and smiled, looking even younger than she was.

But the very next moment her smile faded away, as the door to the building opened, two people coming out. The guy was tall and lanky, he was holding a girl in a too short dress by the hand. Ashton didn’t even need to ask if that was Y/N’s ex, he understood everything by the way she straightened up and got smaller at the same time. The guy and the girl got in an old rusty car and went away in an opposite direction. Ashton looked at Y/N again with a question in his eyes.

Y/N shrugged. “I’ve already known he was a dickhead, not a big deal,” she answered his silent question. “Let’s just go through with it as fast as possible.”

Ashton nodded and they both got out of the car.

The insides of the building were just as shabby and uninviting as the outsides. Ashton looked at Y/N’s back, she walked first. She seemed so young, pretty and innocent. She didn’t belong here in a slightest. Couldn’t she see it herself?

Y/N, unaware of the attention given to her back, made her way to the post boxes, fished the key out of one of them, and rushed to the stairs with a satisfied grin on her face. Ashton followed suit.

Little apartment on the third floor though looked cozy and carefully looked after. Ashton didn’t really expect to see that, but, he would bet, it was all because of Y/N. A week without her, and that douchebag of her ex would make this place fit the surrounding.

Y/N didn’t waste any time. The moment Ashton entered the apartment, she was already in the tiny kitchen searching for something. Two minutes later she rushed into the supposed bedroom with a pack of trash bags. Ashton looked around the living room and decided to follow Y/N.

Bedroom looked as neat as the living room except for the undone bed, left by two people not so long ago. Y/N was standing there and just looking at this bed, like only now she’s realised that her ex cheated on her in their bed and it was really the end of their relationship. Ashton coughed, bringing her back to the reality. Y/N jumped a little and tuned to the wardrobe, trying not to look at Ashton.

“So, what exactly happened between you and that moron?” he asked, looking as she took one trash bag and started to put there all her clothes, not even looking at things that were disappearing inside the bag. Ashton came up to her and picked up the trash bag to help her.

“Thanks,” she smiled a little, but all her look was screaming about how awful she felt here and how much wanted to leave. “Nothing new, to be honest,” she started talking, not sparing him another look. “We were at that bar with his friends. I never really got on with them, they just didn’t like me, don’t know why,” she shrugged.

That’s because they all knew you were thousand times better than all of them, Ashton thought, but kept it to himself.

“So Josh, my ex, started to flirt with that girl, which wasn’t new also. But, for some reason, I wasn’t ready to tolerate it anymore. So I came up to him and we started fighting, right in the middle of a bar. What was different this time though,” Y/N continued, taking another trash bag and collecting her shoes, mostly flats and sneakers, “is that he was really angry. I’ve never seen him so angry with me. When things went really off the window, he started shouting, said I was useless, worthless, not sexy. You know,” she shrugged, stepping to the chest of drawers, “all the pretty things a guy can say to his girl. And then he did the most romantic thing, he slapped me on the face and said I can go back to the hole he digged me out from.”

Ashton felt his knuckles hurting from how hard he was holding on a trash bag. He looked at her back, wanted to say he was sorry that she end up with a shitty man like that, that she had to go through all of it. But something stopped him. He knew, pity was not something she needed or wanted right now.

“And thank you,” she said, not looking at him but still being able to read his mind. “For not saying how you’re sorry. With Josh I totally got what I was asking for. I was stupid from the beginning, and here I am now.”

Nobody deserves that, thought Ashton still looking at her back. He felt the urge to say something, to change the topic, to get her from that awful memory somehow. But she did everything hersels. Y/N grabbed a hoodie and a pair of leggings from a pile of clothes she digged from her drawers and disappeared in the bathroom, leaving Ashton with “Hold on a second.”

Ashton looked around the bedroom one more time. Not more than ten minutes she spent packing her stuff. Empty shelves in a closet looked oddly sad. Y/N packed all the books from a tiny bookshelf, the only two photo frames and rather small pile of makeup. Not much, but without these few things the room was left empty and almost depressing. Not a sign of a neat cozyness he saw when entering the room.

Y/N came back from the bathroom and pushed the dress from the other night down one of the trash bags with a severe sigh.

“God, I hate that dress so much,” she mumbled, looking around.

“Why to take it then?” Ashton chuckled looking at her concentrated face, as she was packing last bits of her staff and checking all the corners for missed items.

She looked back at him quickly, not really registering him standing there, too occupied with her mission.

“Don't wanna leave anything behind,” Y/N answered quietly. “Don't wanna him having anything of my staff. He's taken more than enough from me already. I'll decide on what to keep and what not later.”

Ashton only nodded, knowing well what she was talking about. And suddenly an odd feeling came to him. He couldn't even fully comprehend it, but he felt proud. He was standing there, in the bedroom of her cheating asshole of an ex, looking at her tiny figure and couldn't help feeling proud. The way she coped with it, the way she finished it once and for all, not even sparing him another tear, not wishing for him to have a single reminder of her. She was so strong, and yet so unaware of it.

“I think, we're done here,” she said, looking around for the last time. “Let's go back to the living room.”

Ashton took two full trash bags, she grabbed the third, filled only on a half. She spent even less time in the living room, taking little interior stuff like half burnt candles and one tiny fern which was carefully held by Ashton, while Y/N was finishing packing.

“What did you do?” Ashton asked just cause he got bored from standing there with a fern in his hands.

“What?” she looked up at him with surprise in her eyes, like she forgot again she wasn’t alone.

“While you lived here,” Ashton explained. “You said you didn’t go to college. What did you do?”

“Almost nothing,” she admitted with a sigh and looked away. “I tried to get a job couple of times in the coffee shops nearby, but Josh didn't like when I was away for long, so all my attempts usually ended up in scandals and me spending hours here without him. I mostly read.”

“He didn’t like you to be away?” Ashton asked in confusion.

“Yeah,” Y/N shrugged. “Said my place was next to him. Or started blaming me for being greedy if I tried to point out that I need my own money.”

Ashton nodded again. He didn't know what he could answer to that. He remembered his own words from the previous night. What if it was Lauren? Could she fell for such guy? Could she believe in this being love?

“But don’t worry,” Y/N continued. “I’m going to get a job as soon as possible.”

“It’s not why I-” Ashton rushed, “I just asked.”

She looked back at him and surprised him with a bright smile. “I know. But I do wanna get a job. I feel like I’m finally got tired of doing nothing and being noone.”

“You’re not noone,” Ashton shook his head, deep frown on his face. Y/N only smiled at him.

She grabbed a sparkly purse from under a sofa and examined its contents, Ashton got a glimpse of a shattered phone screen. She chuckled and rushed back into the kitchen. He heard clicking of some jars and then the crunch sound of paper. Right after that Y/N came out, hiding something in her purse.

“We good to go,” she said and grabbed on the nearest bag.

Ashton hesitated for a moment, not knowing how to cope with the fern and two bag, but Y/N grabbed the poor plant from his hands. Ashton took other bags, suppressed an unwelcome sigh drawn by the weight and followed her to the door.

Y/N closed the door behind them, locked it and left the key where she’d taken it in a post box on the ground floor. The way to the car was silent. As all her stuff ended up in Ashton’s car trunk and she herself on a passenger seat, holding the poor fern, Y/N congratulated herself on going through it so fast and firmly. And yet, when Ashton was setting off and driving from their parking lot, she glanced in a rearview mirror at the building she had been calling home for over nine months. And now was praying never to see again. Was she really letting go of it? Was she ready to let go of it?

They turned and she couldn’t see the building anymore. Whatever. Was she ready or not, life was already pushing her away from what she knew. And Y/N had no other choice than to start moving along.

***

Ashton pushed the door to his bedroom and froze.

Darkness around reminded him of a previous night, which had happened an entire lifetime ago. Yet less than twenty-four hours had passed since their meeting. He turned to the door to her room and heard it again, the sound that made him freeze. A quiet sob.

Ashton took another step to the room she’d occupied and raised a hand to knock. But he didn’t. He put his hands in his jeans pockets and just stood there, in front of the door, listening to her quiet crying.

Truth to be told, he wasn’t surprised. He remembered her earlier in the day, when they went to grab her stuff. She was so fierce, so on-a-mission-like. She didn’t brake then, didn’t go into reminiscing on the good old days (which probably weren’t that good). And he felt how strong she was that moment, how ready to change her life. But Ashton knew what was behind each strong woman. He saw it in his mom too many times before. He felt it inside himself every so often. These mountains of sadness and regret and pain, they shown noone. The darkness of their bedrooms was the only creature who could see their burden. And noone else.

Ashton sighed inaudibly and went to his own room, hesitated at the door frame, but left the door open, God only knows why. He fell on his bed and stared into the ceiling.

He wasn’t surprised, yet it was so odd to hear her crying. She was so lively and almost happy just couple hours ago, when they were having dinner.

“So you cook.”

Y/N jumped at the sound of his voice, coming so unexpectedly from behind her back. She gave Ashton a sheepish smile and shrugged.

“You made breakfast,” she explained, turning off the stove and checking on the meat for the last time. “I thought it would be only fair if I cooked dinner. Being roommates is about the partnership, right?”

Ashton chuckled, “I guess.”

He helped her set the table and they spent more than half an hour just talking about stuff. She happened to be a good cook, and mocked his slightly surprised looks.

“What do you mean, you don’t usually eat?” she asked.

“In here, I don’t usually eat in here,” Ashton explained. “We eat out a lot, or just order something. I almost never cook.”

“Oh, how boring,” she pouted in fake disappointment. “And I almost thought you’re a vampire or something like this, so you don’t need food at all.”

Ashton couldn’t hold back the laughter. “First gang member, now the vampire. You do have a wild imagination.”

She shrugged nonchalantly. “Well, if you ever have a chance of becoming one of these, vampire is better.”

“Why? They’re killers.”

“Gang members are too, but as a vampire you can live forever at least,” she explained, finishing her dish.

“You wanna live forever?” Ashton was having a hard time rushing after her thoughts.

“Why not?” she smiled and with that started clearing the table.

Ashton sat up on his bed. He never knew the soundproofing was so terrible in this house,but he could basically hear every damn sob of hers. He couldn’t just lay here while she was crying her heart out, could he?

And then he stood up, came up to his door and closed it, to muffle the sounds. He lied back on the bed and sighed one more time hiding his face in his hands.

He remembered his own heartbreak, happened so long ago. He was hurting like hell and needed someone to come ease the pain. He needed a person to just listen and understand his pain and struggling. But if at the moment of his darkest grief he’d had somebody to listen, he wouldn’t have spoken up. He wouldn’t even have let this person in. He was aching and he wasn’t ready to get help. Some wounds needed not only time to heal, but also loneliness and growth. And no matter how much he wanted, he couldn’t help her with that.

Ashton thought of Lauren again. Would he come up to her, if it was his little sister there crying in the bedroom? He sighed again. No, he wouldn’t. He would fully respect her right to cry in the security of her bedroom and come for help the moment she was ready.

His phone vibrated shortly somewhere on the bed, signaling about the new message. Ashton stretched his arm and grabbed the little device.

He sat up and read the message.

He fully respected Y/N’s right to ache and suffer alone in his guest room. But he also couldn’t just sit here listening to a living creature in pain so close to him and not being able to help in any way.

So he stood up, took his jacket and left the room. He couldn’t stay here, so he would go to where he could easily forget it all.

***

Y/N woke up to the sound of shower. She stretched without opening her eyes and thought it was just like waking up in the Josh’s apartment with walls so thin you could hear everything you neighbours were doing. Including morning showers. But still she couldn’t help noticing how everything was slightly different, even the sound of water.

She picked up her phone from a night table and switched on the shattered screen. It probably broke when Josh threw her purse on the floor of his apartment, or any other moment, she didn’t have a clue and wasn’t interested for that matter either. Still, she could work out the time through the thick net of cracks. It was almost ten, but felt like early morning. Y/N wasn’t the person to sleep long in the day, and even ten was past the waking time for her. But today she didn’t really want to get up. Preferably at all.

Y/N buried her face in the pillows and sighed. She felt terrible, not a piece of yesterday’s joy and resolve left in her. She couldn’t even remember why she started crying yesterday night. One moment she’s deleting Josh’s number and all their messages, the next she’s sobbing under the covers of the bed. She cried for several hours, couldn’t even remember crying so much ever before. And then she fell asleep worn out by all of the crying. So today she was useless, ugly and tired as hell. She didn’t want to get out of bed and exist. And she definitely didn’t want Ashton to see her like this.

The water stopped and couple moments later Y/N heard the door click. She didn’t know what plans for the day he had and if she could just avoid him today, but she was willing to try.

Truth to be told, Y/N was surprised to hear him at home at all. She remembered him leaving late at night, she heard his car. But she didn’t hear him coming back, being asleep at that time obviously. She wondered for a moment where could he go at almost one in the morning, but dropped it fast, knowing it was not her business anyway.

The next thing she heard was the sound of opening door to his bedroom and his pretty fast steps down the hall. Couple minutes later his car drove out of the parking lot, and Y/N took a deep breath of relief.

He left. Hopefully for the day. Surely real musicians had a lot to do, like write new music or whatever other shit he was doing. And she could just proceed with her day, being miserable.

Y/N spent another hour just wallowing in the bed, drowning in sleep and coming up to the surface again, until she decided to finally get up and at least cook some food.

She spent some time in a bathroom, found in one of the trash bags, which were standing now next to the window, her favourite soft socks, decided that she was covered enough for an empty house in just socks and a band tee, and left her room.

The living room was just as bright and spacious as she remembered, with its light walls and big windows. Y/N though for a moment of how wonderful it would be to call this house a home. But she pushed that idea from her mind. She was here just for the couple of days and had no right for such thoughts.

“Good morning,” she heard from a kitchen and jumped from a shock. Y/N turned back and saw a strict looking lady in her mid-fifties probably, looking at her with a smile on her lips and a stern expression in her eyes.

Y/N just froze there not knowing what to say. Was it his mother? Another roommate? Just a person he sent to deal with the problem, which Y/N was, because he regretted helping her in the first place?

“My name is Mrs. Powell, I’m a housekeeper,” the woman explained, not caring much for a startled expression on a girl’s face. “Mr. Irwin has left to the studio for the whole day. But I’ll be happy to get you an Uber as soon as you’re ready.”

***

Taglist: @paqueretteash , @myloverboyash

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terreisa · 4 years

Text

Love Down the Line: Chapter 6

The last thing Indie musician Emma Swan needs is a gigantic wrench thrown in the workings of her biggest tour to date weeks before its launch. When her backing guitarist that caused the problem says she has the perfect solution Emma is skeptical but left with little choice but to accept. Unfortunately she isn't really prepared for said solution to be former Rock Star and leading man of Emma's teenage fantasies, Killian Jones. With no other options and a month of performing across the country ahead of her Emma just hopes she doesn't come to regret letting Killian onto her stage and into her life.

Ch 1, Ch 2, Ch 3, Ch 4, Ch 5, AO3

~*CS*~

Chicago, May 15th

Emma could feel a headache starting to bloom at the base of her skull. She hadn’t gotten enough sleep, which wasn’t unusual, and she’d only had the chance to drink one cup of coffee since the day started, which was. To make matters worse the sound check had been going wrong since the beginning and she had been forced to play the first verse of Bite of Iron four times, never making it past the first line of the chorus before having to start again.

“Alright, Emma, let’s see if that fixed it. Whenever you’re ready.”

She nodded, biting her cheek against the tirade she wanted to let loose. Barely a minute in the sound tech interrupted her again. Flexing her hands into fists over the keys of the piano she counted to ten, then did it backwards before speaking into her mike.

“Can we take a break?”

“Su-”

“They’ve almost got it, Emma. Right gentleman?” Regina broke in from the side of the stage where she was standing with the others since they weren’t needed for the song. She had barely looked up from her phone and was still typing away as she continued, “You do want it to sound right, don’t you? Let them do their job and then you can move past this one.”

At Regina’s words something in Emma snapped. She stood abruptly from her piano, a loud buzzing in her ears. Someone, she wasn’t entirely sure who, started saying something to her but she barely heard what they were saying as she practically ran offstage. All she wanted was to get a lungful of fresh air, anything to ease the clawing at her throat.

In her rush to find an exit that led outside she ended up getting turned around and completely confused as to where she was. The clawing feeling had traveled down to her chest, compressing her lungs so it was getting hard for her to breathe. Before she could lose her shit completely a warm hand wrapped around her wrist and tugged gently.

“Follow me, love.”

She let Killian lead her through the labyrinth like corridors, barely paying attention to the turns they were taking or the doors they were going through. However, when they entered a stairwell she paused.

“Killian…”

He looked back at her, giving her an encouraging smile, “Trust me?”

It wasn’t even a question to her. Somehow, in the month since they’d been thrown together he had become someone she trusted completely. She nodded and his smile widened as he squeezed her hand and began their ascent. Though she found she was distracted from their progress again at the sight of her hand in his, not to mention the way his jeans hugged his ass as he climbed.

All too quickly Killian opened a door that had sunshine streaming into the stairwell and the heat of the day rolling over them. He had taken her to the roof of the auditorium. It was dotted with air conditioning units and not much else but she noticed that it did have a pretty good view of the city that was sprawled out all around them.

“It’s not much but it’ll give you some time to yourself-” he held out a slim silver can that she hadn’t noticed before, “I hadn’t seen your ubiquitous starbucks cup today so I thought you might want this. Come back down when you’re ready and don’t worry about Regina, I’ll handle it.”

Taking the can of coffee, the one that was on her rider for the days exactly like the one she’d been having, a brand that could only be found in the corner of Maine that Storybrooke inhabited and that Killian had clearly gone to the green room to get before finding her, she was suddenly overwhelmed in a different way than before. No one, not even Mary Margaret and David had known exactly what she needed when things got overwhelming and provided it without question or needing an explanation. He made to leave but she gripped his hand in hers, holding him in place.

“Stay?” She asked softly, “Please?”

His eyes searched hers before he seemed to find what he was looking for. With a nod he walked them over to a small strip of shade provided by the stairwell housing and sat with his back against it. Once he settled he patted the spot next to him, wordlessly inviting her to join him.

The surface of the roof was warm when she sat but not uncomfortably so. There was a slight breeze, not enough to dry the sweat that was gathering at her temples but enough to break the heat of the day. Emma could hear the traffic moving along and through the city, a not so unpleasant hum that matched the air conditioning units kicking on and off to make a bit of a song. She felt herself smile at the thought of putting lyrics to the sounds and then snorted in amusement at the fact that it was easier to make up a song on the fly than to play one she’d intentionally written.

“Something funny, Swan?” Killian asked, his own voice laced with humor.

“Only if you’re me,” she said wryly, snapping open the coffee and drinking near half of it one one go. She tipped her head back and stared up at the cloudless blue sky, “Did you know?”

“Hmm? Know what?”

She kept her gaze trained upwards but could imagine his eyebrow ticked up in slight confusion and intrigue, “When you said to play Bite of Iron, did you know that I’d never played it live before?”

“Not once?” She shook her head and he gave a low hum, “No, love, I didn’t. It is a beautiful song, it’s a shame the sound guys did it such an injustice. No wonder you stormed off.”

For a moment she almost didn’t want to correct him. There really was no reason to explain or even justify her behavior. She was sure that he’d seen worse from others in the business, she’d seen it herself. The thing was she wanted to tell him the truth of what had upset her. It was like the words were pressing against her lips, ready to spill out into her lap. Just as she made up her mind to go through with it, absolutely certain that he wouldn’t judge or condemn her, he began to speak.

“Everyone assumed Milah was the diva of the group and she could be, if the occasion called for it, as could I. But Liam-” he chuckled and then sighed, “Liam never gave into theatrics but if things weren’t going exactly how he wanted it he could, and would, let his displeasure be known. He once refused to board our tour bus one evening because the driver had decided to take a nap and got to the venue nearly an hour late. We had to charter a plane to make it to our next stop on the tour because Liam’s obstinance caused an even bigger delay to our departure. The label made him pay for the cost of the plane from his own pocket. Served the git right.”

Emma sat completely still, entranced. He hadn’t talked to her about Liam since Cincinnati and she’d noticed that he’d been writing in his notebooks more since then. She had a feeling that maybe, just maybe, he was feeling the same push that she was to share the painful parts of his past. To trust her with them.

“You miss him,” she said softly but surely. It was easy to hear the longing in his voice.

“Aye, I miss them both. It’ll be twelve years and I still expect Liam to come walking into my apartment calling me ‘little brother’ or I’ll wake and reach for Milah across the empty bed-” his hand clenched on his thigh before he sighed again, “There’s a constant ache in my chest for missing them.”

She didn’t know what to say, what he would want to hear. There had been precious few people in her life that she felt that strongly about and she had never lost any of them. Just thought of either of the Nolans or Ruby being taken from her as Killian’s brother and fiance had been had her breath backing up in her throat.

“This probably wasn’t what you had in mind when you escaped, was it?” he asked, nudging her shoulder with his. “Apologies.”

“Don’t,” she said quickly, grabbing onto the hand that was still clenched on his thigh. “You don’t need to apologize for talking about them. I get the feeling you don’t do it very often.”

“That I don’t-” he unclenched his hand and she let hers settle in his open palm, her heart threatening to jump out of her chest as she did. “It was too hard at first, I’d lash out or dive deeper into the bottle, most times both, and then people just stopped asking. Decent people that is, the gossip rags and paps are the soulless exception.

“Milah hated them from the start. They followed her around more than the rest of us seeing as she was the lead singer and a beautiful woman to boot. Once they got it in their minds we’d been romantically involved for longer than we had been they were relentless.”

Emma tried to hide her surprise at learning that nugget of information but with her hand in his he appeared to have felt it. He grinned, his eyebrow raising in an unasked question.

“It’s just, uh, I thought that you guys were, um, high school sweethearts,” she meant to make it sound like a statement yet it came out like a question.

He laughed, a small but genuine thing, his free hand scratching at the back of his neck, “Our publicist spun it like that and we went along with it for interviews and such. More romantic he liked to say. Truth was even though we’d gone to the same secondary school she was in Liam and Robin’s year and I’d hardly spoken to her then. It was only when they started playing together after they’d left that I got to know her. She seemed so sophisticated and worldly to my scrawny teenage ass, even though she was only three years older than me and had never left our tiny village either.

“It wasn’t until during our first real tour that we gave into the attraction that’d been growing between us. From then on it was like throwing a match at a puddle of petrol. It was us against the crazy world we’d been thrust into and we thrived on it,” he said with a frown. “We partied a little too hard, fought a little too meanly, and were dependent on each other in ways I know now weren’t healthy. I loved her deeply, I always will, and I know she loved me but sometimes I wonder if we would have made it had she lived.”

“I think…” Emma paused, wanting to get the words right and not completely destroy whatever it was that was growing between them at the same time, “You kinda seem like a guy that wouldn’t let something like that slip through your fingers. The way you were talking about her just now? I think you would have fought like hell to stay together.”

“I’d like to think so,” he said, ducking his head. “Liam would say the same thing when I voiced my doubts. He’d been dead set against it at first and wasn’t too pleased with how we behaved most days but he always said he understood how much we loved each other. Of course he also understood that we wrote some of our best songs once we got together.”

“Some of your best songs,” she said thoughtfully, drawn back to the reason she’d fled the stage, “You were right about Bite of Iron, you know. When you suggested it I was trying to figure out why the set didn’t seem right. The Boston crowd was so surprised when I started playing it.”

“It’s an exceptional song, Swan.”

“Yeah,” she said quietly. “Do you know what it’s about? I mean, you’ve obviously listened to it a lot since you knew it would work out.”

The tips of his ears tinged pink, “I’ve listened to it a time or two. It’s a love song is it not? Or rather, a love lost song?”

She snorted, only half in amusement, “Something like that. Everyone knows that I’m an orphan and all that jazz, I’ve never hid it and Regina says that it’s my ‘thing’. You know, the thing that makes me unique.”

“Bollocks, you make yourself unique,” Killian said heatedly, squeezing her hand in emphasis, “Your songwriting, your playing, everything about you sets you apart from the chaff.”

It was her turn to blush, “I mean, obviously, but, you know, it’s Regina.”

“Aye, she’s not one prone to mincing her words,” he scoffed.

“No, but she has my back and knows how to bury things. Like how I went to juvie and had a baby.”

Her attempt at nonchalance fell flat as Killian stiffened beside her. She steeled herself, ready for him to pull away from her both physically and emotionally. While she absolutely believed he wouldn’t think less of her or go to the press with the information she had no idea what his reaction could be.

“Did you- was it-” he huffed out a breath through his nose, clearly frustrated. A muscle in his jaw was ticking but when he looked at her his gaze was soft, “I’m sorry that happened to you, love.”

The sincerity in his voice caught her off guard. Coming from anyone else she would have brushed it off as a platitude or pitying. Killian sounded like he was the one who had caused it all and was apologizing for it. She felt a glowing warmth expanding inside her, giving her the courage to continue.

“I didn’t do it, in case you were wondering. I was young, stupid, and in love, not the greatest combination-” she deadpanned, shrugging one shoulder. Taking a deep breath she forged on, “I had just turned seventeen and was on my own since I’d had the bright idea of running away from the Nolan’s. I don’t even remember why now, probably some fucking teenage angst or something. Doesn’t matter. So I met this guy, Neal. And he was older and knew how to survive on the streets and he got me. Just… understood all the shit I’d gone through with the whole orphan thing and didn’t judge me for it. We had this whole outlaw life, living in the back of this car I’m pretty sure was stolen, sneaking into motel rooms when people checked out for a few hours, and stealing but only food. Well, I thought it was only the food.

“A few months after we got together he comes up to me in a panic, telling me how the cops are after him because of some watches he’d stolen and left at the bus depot and how he’s gotta go to Canada and I couldn’t go with him-” she gave Killian a rueful smile, “You probably know how well that went over.”

“Like a lead balloon I’m guessing,” he murmured with a somewhat pained chuckle.

“Yeah,” she sighed, “So I come up with this brilliant plan, yeah? Why don’t I go get the watches? Prove to him that he needed me and obviously the cops wouldn’t be looking for a teenage girl, right? He just lit up when I told him, said I was a genius and gave me the key to the locker he’d stashed the watches in. It worked, I got those damn watches.

“When I got back to where Neal was hiding out he gave me some song and dance about fencing the watches to get the money we need to go to Canada. How I couldn’t go with him because the guy he had to deal with doesn’t like strangers or whatever. Before he leaves, though, he gives me one of the watches, a giant clunky thing covered in diamonds that was worth a hell of a lot more than anything I had ever owned in my life. He tells me-” she scoffs and scowls at the memory, “tells me he doesn’t want me to be late for when we were supposed to meet back up. I swallowed every word, spent the whole day dreaming up all sorts of plans of what our life was going to be like in Canada while I waited for it to be the time we’d agreed on. I wasn’t late but neither were the cops who’d been tipped off that I’d be there holding stolen property. The fucking, lying, sneaky asshole had left a couple of the watches in my backpack along with the one he’d put on my wrist. Got a year in juvie for being his goddamn scapegoat.”

“But you were innocent,” Killian spluttered, moving to stand until she grabbed his arm and forced him to stay next to her.

“Which is part of the reason why I went to juvie instead of prison,” she said calmly, even though she was amazed he was indignant on her behalf. “They couldn’t prove I had anything to do with actually stealing the watches, just that I had some of them on me. The other part was being closer to seventeen than eighteen. Another month older and I think they would have tried me as an adult.”

“They caught him at least? This Neal?” Killian spat out the name, his lips curling back in disdain.

“I don’t know and I don’t really care anymore,” she answered honestly.

He nodded as if it made sense before lowering his eyes and asking hesitantly, “And the… erm… the babe?”

She sighed and felt as if she had dredged it up from deep in her soul. Her hand was still on Killian’s arm and he placed his other on hers, squeezing her fingers gently. Somehow she knew if she said she didn’t want to talk about it he’d understand and wouldn’t push and that more than anything gave her the courage to keep going.

“I found out I was pregnant about a month into my sentence and the first person to congratulate me was a guard passing by my cell. I think that more than anything made me realize how much I’d fucked up. The next time I had phone privileges I called Mary Margaret and David. Back then I told myself that it was because they were the only number I had memorized but I think deep down I knew they wouldn’t judge me or just brush me off as a runaway they had no obligation to help anymore. Mary Margaret took the next flight out to Phoenix and David came a few days later. It was the first time I’d ever felt really, truly loved. They could only stay for a week but we became a family in that week.”

She could feel her throat tightening but kept talking, “The Nolans were there for me the whole time, as much as they could be with their jobs and the group home. They even said they would help me raise the baby, if that’s what I wanted. I couldn’t do it though, I wasn’t ready to be a mom.”

“Swan-”

“Did you know that they handcuff you to the bed when you’re in custody of the state and in labor?” She plowed on, determined to finish, “Like I’d make a run for it while a human being came tearing out of me. The cuffs were steel but it doesn’t sound as poetic. I didn’t even hold him. I knew I wouldn’t let him go if I did.”

She had managed to keep the tears that had gathered in her eyes from falling until that moment. It was something she’d only admitted once before, to Mary Margaret on her son’s first birthday. Before she could think to wipe the tears away Killian was doing so with a warm and gentle touch.

“You’re incredibly brave, Emma, did you know that?” He asked, his voice full of awe.

“I wasn’t ready to be a mom,” she repeated shakily, “I knew that giving him up was the best thing for the both of us.”

“Would you want to find him? Now?”

She shook her head before his questions were finished, “I already did, or a private investigator did. He’s happy with his adopted family, he’s got a brother and friends and a good life. He doesn’t need me coming in and making a mess of it.”

“You wouldn’t make a mess of it,” Killian said vehemently.

“Yeah, I would,” she said patiently. She gave him a sad smile, “Let’s for a second forget the fact that we’re sitting on the roof of a venue that in six hours will have forty-five hundred people waiting to hear me play. Just the fact that his birth mom would come out of nowhere and decide to insert herself into his life is bad enough. With all this shit on top of it? No, he’s happy and that’s all I need to know. If someday he decides to find me then I’ll be ready to be a part of his life, but only when he’s ready not before.

“Anyway-” she plowed on, “playing Bite of Iron brings all that shit up again. It’s why I’ve never put it in the lineup before.”

“And then my ignorant ass goes and pushes you to do just that,” Killian spat out bitterly.

He pulled his arm out from under hers but she immediately grabbed his hand, unwilling to part with the comfort his touch had given her.

“It was more like a gentle nudge,” she said teasingly, glad to see his mouth tick up for a moment in amusement. She sobered, “I wouldn’t have put it in if I didn’t want to play it. It’s been eleven years and I can’t heal or whatever if I keep it all bottled up inside. It actually hasn’t been that bad, playing it every night, today was just… a little too much with the constant interruptions and then having to half play it over and over.”

“Well, your diva fit was well justified, I’d say.”

She surprised herself with a burst of laughter. Killian was clearly trying to lighten the mood, she could still see tension in the way he held his shoulders and the slight furrow of his brow, but he was making the effort for her. The glowing warmth from earlier expanded and morphed into butterflies. Leaning into him she pressed a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth.

“Thank you, for helping me escape.”

Killian looked dumbfounded, his mouth dropped open in surprise. She grinned at his stupor. Rising to her feet she felt like she could play Bite of Iron twenty times in a row if he was the one listening, watching her with that same soft look on his face. Just as she was about to say as much or something even more ridiculously sappy the door leading to the roof opened.

“Oh, thank God, you are up here!” Tink breathed out as soon as she caught sight of them, sounding immensely relieved. “Regina’s either going to murder you or make you pay out of pocket for the time she says you’ve wasted. Why haven’t you answered your phone?”

“I-” Emma patted her back pocket and winced when she hit nothing but her ass, “Shit, I think I left it on the piano.”

“Do not tell Regina that,” Tink said horrified. “Tell her it died or spontaneously combusted or whatever, anything that will keep her from blowing another gasket. She’s already muttering about breach of contract.”

“It’s only a breach of contract if I don’t play tonight, not the goddamn soundcheck from hell,” she rolled her eyes.

Killian stood and Emma winced again as Tink’s eyes widened as she noticed him. Tink turned her bewildered gaze to her and Emma knew she would be facing a full inquisition at some point. Not wanting to give away anything more than she already had she avoided both Tink and Killian’s gazes as she marched to the door.

“Come on, let’s get Regina’s tantrum and the rest of soundcheck out of the way and then go find some deep dish pizza. My treat.”

As she stepped back into the air conditioned stairwell she breathed a sigh of relief that Tink had interrupted them when she did. She wasn’t entirely sure she was ready for whatever leap she’d just taken when it came to Killian. She also wasn’t entirely sure she shouldn’t have leaped further.

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