#and an extra 5-10 minutes up said country roads

[beaversatemygrandma]

Oh right, the problem with living out in the middle of nowhere... getting TO a job...

At least it's all plain two lane country roads to get to either part of town not requiring a single highway. But ya know. All 60+mph. And like 25 minute drives in good traffic.

[tisfan]

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From Joe Morice, daughters in 8th & 10th grade in Fairfax County Public Schools' Centreville Pyramid:

To our fellow FCPS families—this is it gang: 5 days until the 2 days in school vs. 100% virtual decision. Let’s talk it out, in my traditional mammoth TL/DR form.

Like all of you, I’ve seen my feed become a flood of anxiety and faux expertise. You’ll get no presumption of expertise here. This is how I am looking at and considering this issue and the positions people have taken in my feed and in the hundred or so FCPS discussion groups that have popped up. The lead comments in quotes are taken directly from my feed and those boards. Sometimes I try to rationalize them. Sometimes I’m just punching back at the void.

Full disclosure, we initially chose the 2 days option and are now having serious reservations. As I consider the positions and arguments I see in my feed, these are where my mind goes. Of note, when I started working on this piece at 12:19 PM today the COVID death tally in the United States stood at 133,420.

“My kids want to go back to school.”

I challenge that position. I believe what the kids desire is more abstract. I believe what they want is a return to normalcy. They want their idea of yesterday. And yesterday isn’t on the menu.

“I want my child in school so they can socialize.”

This was the principle reason for our 2 days decision. As I think more on it though, what do we think ‘social’ will look like? There aren’t going to be any lunch table groups, any lockers, any recess games, any study halls, any sitting next to friends, any talking to people in the hallway, any dances. All of that is off the menu. So, when we say that we want the kids to benefit from the social experience, what are we deluding ourselves into thinking in-building socialization will actually look like in the Fall?

“My kid is going to be left behind.”

Left behind who? The entire country is grappling with the same issue, leaving all children in the same quagmire. Who exactly would they be behind? I believe the rhetorical answer to that is “They’ll be behind where they should be,” to which I’ll counter that “where they should be” is a fictional goal post that we as a society have taken as gospel because it maps to standardized tests which are used to grade schools and counties as they chase funding.

“Classrooms are safe.”

At the current distancing guidelines from FCPS middle and high schools would have no more than 12 people (teachers + students) in a classroom (I acknowledge this number may change as FCPS considers the Commonwealth’s 3 ft with a mask vs. 6 ft position, noting that FCPS is all mask regardless of the distance). For the purpose of this discussion we’ll say classes run 45 minutes.

I posed the following question to 40 people today, representing professional and management roles in corporations, government agencies, and military commands: “Would your company or command have a 12 person, 45 minute meeting in a conference room?”

100% of them said no, they would not. These are some of their answers:

“No. Until further notice we are on Zoom.”

“(Our company) doesn’t allow us in (company space).”

“Oh hell no.”

“No absolutely not.”

“Is there a percentage lower than zero?”

“Something of that size would be virtual.”

We do not even consider putting our office employees into the same situation we are contemplating putting our children into. And let’s drive this point home: there are instances here when commanding officers will not put soldiers, ACTUAL SOLDIERS, into the kind of indoor environment we’re contemplating for our children. For me this is as close to a ‘kill shot’ argument as there is in this entire debate. How do we work from home because buildings with recycled air are not safe, because we don’t trust other people to not spread the virus, and then with the same breath send our children into buildings?

“Children only die .0016 of the time.”

First, conceding we’re an increasingly morally bankrupt society, but when did we start talking about children’s lives, or anyone’s lives, like this? This how the villain in movies talks about mortality, usually 10-15 minutes before the good guy kills him.

If you’re in this camp, and I acknowledge that many, many people are, I’m asking you to consider that number from a slightly different angle.

FCPS has 189,000 children. .0016 of that is 302. 302 dead children are the Calvary Hill you’re erecting your argument on. So, let’s agree to do this: stop presenting this as a data point. If this is your argument, I challenge you to have courage equal to your conviction. Go ahead, plant a flag on the internet and say, “Only 302 children will die.” No one will. That’s the kind action on social media that gets you fired from your job. And I trust our social media enclave isn’t so careless and irresponsible with life that it would even, for even a millisecond, enter any of your minds to make such an argument.

Considered another way: You’re presented with a bag with 189,000 $1 bills. You’re told that in the bag are 302 random bills, they look and feel just like all the others, but each one of those bills will kill you. Do you take the money out of the bag?

Same argument, applied to the 12,487 teachers in FCPS (per Wikipedia), using the ‘children’s multiplier’ of .0016 (all of us understanding the adult mortality rate is higher). That’s 20 teachers. That’s the number you’re talking about. It’s very easy to sit behind a keyboard and diminish and dismiss the risk you’re advocating other people assume. Take a breath and think about that.

If you want to advocate for 2 days a week, look, I’m looking for someone to convince me. But please, for the love of God, drop things like this from your argument. Because the people I know who’ve said things like this, I know they’re better people than this. They’re good people under incredible stress who let things slip out as their frustration boils over. So, please do the right thing and move on from this, because one potential outcome is that one day, you’re going to have to stand in front of St. Peter and answer for this, and that’s not going to be conversation you enjoy.

“Hardly any kids get COVID.”

(Deep sigh) Yes, that is statistically true as of this writing. But it is a cherry-picked argument because you’re leaving out an important piece.

One can reasonably argue that, due to the school closures in March, children have had the least EXPOSURE to COVID. In other words, closing schools was the one pandemic mitigation action we took that worked. There can be no discussion of the rate of diagnosis within children without also acknowledging they were among our fastest and most quarantined people. Put another way, you cannot cite the effect without acknowledging the cause.

“The flu kills more people every year.”

(Deep sigh). First of all, no, it doesn’t. Per the CDC, United States flu deaths average 20,000 annually. COVID, when I start writing here today, has killed 133,420 in six months.

And when you mention the flu, do you mean the disease that, if you’re suspected of having it, everyone, literally everyone in the country tells you stay the f- away from other people? You mean the one where parents are pretty sure their kids have it but send them to school anyway because they have a meeting that day, the one that every year causes massive f-ing outbreaks in schools because schools are petri dishes and it causes kids to miss weeks of school and leaves them out of sports and band for a month? That one? Because you’re right - the flu kills people every year. It does, but you’re ignoring the why. It’s because there are people who are a--holes who don’t care about infecting other people. In that regard it’s a perfect comparison to COVID.

“Almost everyone recovers.”

You’re confusing “release from the hospital” and “no longer infected” with “recovered.” I’m fortunate to only know two people who have had COVID. One my age and one my dad’s age. The one my age described it as “absolute hell” and although no longer infected cannot breathe right. The one my dad’s age was in the hospital for 13 weeks, had to have a trach ring put in because she could no longer be on a ventilator, and upon finally getting home and being faced with incalculable time in rehab told my mother, “I wish I had died.”

While I’m making every effort to reach objectivity, on this particular point, you don’t know what the f- you’re talking about.

“If people get sick, they get sick.”

First, you mistyped. What you intended to say was “If OTHER people get sick, they get sick.” And shame on you.

“I’m not going to live my life in fear.”

You already live your life in fear. For your health, your family’s health, your job, your retirement, terrorists, extremists, one political party or the other being in power, the new neighbors, an unexpected home repair, the next sunrise. What you meant to say was, “I’m not prepared to add ANOTHER fear,” and I’ve got news for you: that ship has sailed. It’s too late. There are two kinds of people, and only two: those that admit they’re afraid, and those that are lying to themselves about it.

As to the fear argument, fear is the reason you wait up when your kids stay out late, it’s the reason you tell your kids not to dive in the shallow water, to look both ways before crossing the road. Fear is the respect for the wide world that we teach our children. Except in this instance, for reasons no one has been able to explain to me yet.

“FCPS leadership sucks.”

I will summarize my view of the School Board thusly: if the 12 of you aren’t getting into a room together because it represents a risk, don’t tell me it’s OK for our kids. I understand your arguments, that we need the 2 days option for parents who can’t work from home, kids who don’t have internet or computer access, kids who needs meals from the school system, kids who need extra support to learn, and most tragically for kids who are at greater risk of abuse by being home. All very serious, all very real issues, all heartbreaking. No argument.

But you must first lead by example. Because you’re failing when it comes to optics. All your meetings are online. What our children see is all of you on a Zoom telling them it’s OK for them to be exactly where you aren’t. I understand you’re not PR people, but you really should think about hiring some.

“I talked it over with my kids.”

Let’s put aside for a moment the concept of adults effectively deferring this decision to children, the same children who will continue to stuff things into a full trash can rather than change it out. Yes, those hygienic children.

Listen, my 15 year old daughter wants a sport car, which she’s not getting next year because it would be dangerous to her and to others. Those kinds of decisions are our job. We step in and decide as parents, we don’t let them expose themselves to risks because their still developing and screen addicted brains narrow their understanding of cause and effect.

We as parents and adults serve to make difficult decisions. Sometimes those are in the form of lessons, where we try to steer kids towards the right answer and are willing to let them make a mistake in the hopes of teaching better decision making the next time around. This is not one of those moments. The stakes are too high for that. This is a “the adults are talking” moment. Kids are not mature enough for this moment. That is not an attack on your child. It is a broad statement about all children. It is true of your children and it was true when we were children. We need to be doing that thinking here, and “Johnny wants to see Bobby at school” cannot be the prevailing element in the equation.

“The teachers need to do their job.”

How is it that the same society which abruptly shifted to virtual students only three months ago, and offered glowing endorsements of teachers stating, “we finally understand how difficult your job is,” has now shifted to “screw you, do your job.” There are myriad problems with that position but for the purposes of this piece let’s simply go with, “You’re not looking for a teacher, you’re looking for the babysitter you feel your property tax payment entitles you to.”

“Teachers have a greater chance to being killed by a car than they do of dying from COVID.”

(Eye roll) Per the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety (IIHS), the U.S. see approximately 36,000 auto fatalities a year. Again, there have been 133,420 COVID deaths in the United States through 12:09 July 10, 2020. So no, they do not have a great chance of being killed in a car accident.

And, if you want to take the actual environment into consideration, the odds of a teacher being killed in a car accident in their classroom, you know, the environment we’re actually talking about, that’s right around 0%.

“If the grocery store workers can be onsite what are the teachers afraid of?”

(Deep breath) A grocery store worker, who absolutely risks exposure, has either six feet of space or a plexiglass shield between them and individual adult customers who can grasp their own mortality whose transactions can be completed in moments, in a 40,000 SF space.

A teacher is with 11 ‘customers’ who have not an inkling what mortality is, for 45 minutes, in a 675 SF space, six times a day.

Just stop.

“Teachers are choosing remote because they don’t want to work.”

(Deep breaths) Many teachers are opting to be remote. That is not a vacation. They’re requesting to do their job at a safer site. Just like many, many people who work in buildings with recycled air have done. And likely the building you’re not going into has a newer and better serviced air system than our schools.

Of greater interest to me is the number of teachers choosing the 100% virtual option for their children. The people who spend the most time in the buildings are the same ones electing not to send their children into those buildings. That’s something I pay attention to.

“I wasn’t prepared to be a parent 24/7” and “I just need a break.”

I truly, deeply respect that honesty. Truth be told, both arguments have crossed my mind. Pre COVID, I routinely worked from home 1 – 2 days a week. The solace was nice. When I was in the office, I had an actual office, a room with a door I could close, where I could focus. During the quarantine that hasn’t always been the case. I’ve been frustrated, I’ve been short, I’ve gone to just take a drive and get the hell away for a moment and been disgusted when one of the kids sees me and asks me to come for a ride, robbing me of those minutes of silence. You want to hear silence. I get it. I really, really do.

Here’s another version of that, admittedly extreme. What if one of our kids becomes one of the 302? What’s that silence going to sound like? What if you have one of those matted frames where you add the kid’s school picture every year? What if you don’t get to finish the pictures?

“What does your gut tell you to do?”

Shawn and I have talked ad infinitum about all of these and other points. Two days ago, at mid-discussion I said, “Stop, right now, gut answer, what is it,” and we both said, “virtual.”

A lot of the arguments I hear people making for the 2 days sound like we’re trying to talk ourselves into ignoring our instincts, they are almost exclusively, “We’re doing 2 days, but…”. There’s a fantastic book by Gavin de Becker, The Gift of Fear, which I’ll minimize for you thusly: your gut instinct is a hardwired part of your brain and you should listen to it. In the introduction he talks about elevators, and how, of all living things, humans are the only ones that would voluntarily get into a soundproof steel box with a potential predator just so they could skip a flight of stairs.

I keep thinking that the 2 days option is the soundproof steel box. I welcome, damn, beg, anyone to convince me otherwise.

At the time I started writing at 12:09 PM, 133,420 Americans had died from COVID. Upon completing this draft at 7:04 PM, that number rose to 133,940.

520 Americans died of COVID while I was working on this. In seven hours.

The length of a school day.

[snowdice]

Espionage and Iced Coffee (Part of the Cuffed Universe Series)

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Remus/Logan (Logan/Remus/Virgil for the universe)

Characters: Remus, Logan

Summary: Remus catches Logan for the first time. Nothing about it goes as expected.

This is a Cuffed Universe fic.

Previous fics in this series:

Tea, Cookies, and Handcuffs 

Matboards and Subway Sandwiches

Extras:

Moving Day

Notes: Non-consensual drug use mentioned, morally grey Logan, cop Remus, fighting, blood, biting, fear of death

This was… surreal. Remus spent a split-second gawking at the familiar figure standing at the ice machine for the motel he was staying at. This, Remus had not been expecting. True, he had taken to staying at places like this when trying to track down Logan because he knew it was the type of place Logan stayed at when on the run, but it had been more about getting into the right head space. He hadn’t expected to stumble upon the man himself while wearing sweats and a t-shirt 10 minutes before he was planning to go to bed.

He’d lost Logan’s trail once again 2 days ago when Logan had ducked out of the research lab he’d been working at for the last month (with a few electronic souvenirs) and had yet to pick it back up. It hadn’t been a surprise after the last 6 months, but it had still been unbelievably frustrating. Logan always seemed to be 2 steps ahead of Remus and 5 steps ahead of everyone else.

Remus had taken it upon himself to personally track down ‘Logan Berry’ after he’d been drugged and left on a kitchen floor by the criminal. His boss seemed inclined to give Remus free reign especially after he’d managed to catch that first trail a couple of months into the investigation where no one else had gotten anywhere close.

‘Logan Berry’ was good. There was a reason he was called “The Ghost of the Dark Web.” He could easily disappear in a moment from the internet and, as Remus had quickly found out, real life. He could fade into the chatter of everyday life in a moment and he could do it incredibly well. This had been made clear as Remus dug into the identity of Logan Berry.

The thing about Logan Berry was he looked so real. It’s why when he’d originally been sent to look for the hacker and eco-terrorist, everyone had thought he was looking for Virgil. Virgil who had no one in his life but dead parents and a roommate, lacked a college degree, and worked a bunch of odd jobs, many of which had paid cash. It was a laughable thought now that Remus had gotten to know Virgil and contextualized his history, but at the time he’d seemed like the obvious cover story for a cybercriminal.

Logan Berry, on the other hand had two living parents that lived in the next state, had spoken at many colleges around the world, and had a string of connections from his undergraduate professors through his PhD advisor. Clearly, he was real.

He was not real.

Remus would find with a bit of digging that the nice couple whose names were on Logan’s birth certificate had never had any children. The degrees and references were mostly fake, though he had actually presented at many colleges and he did seem to know his stuff. Remus had a theory that he had gotten a degree under a different name at some point.

The only person who seemed to actually know him as more than as a passing acquaintance was Virgil, and Remus was convinced at this point that Virgil was completely in the dark when it came to Logan’s criminal activities.

Knowing all of that, he was sure to have slipped away and created another just as good cover within a week of the drugging incident. The trail had run cold. Or, so it would seem, but Remus was nothing if not stubborn. He’d found just the lightest trail after months of looking in the form of a name Virgil had mentioned in passing once. That name had ended up being an alias of Logan that had gone dormant two days after Logan fled the first time, but it had given him something. He’d dug his teeth into that something and had managed to track Logan down, but he’d slipped away into the night once again. That had set off a vicious game of cat and mouse between Remus and Logan that had spanned the last four months.

The cycle had been doomed to repeat again when he’d lost him a couple of days ago. In defeat, Remus had retired to this little motel in a nearby town to regroup. When he had, he had not anticipated this.

Logan’s back was to the door giving Remus a few precious seconds to think. He darted back to his room next door to grab his wallet, car keys, and handcuffs. Everything else, he could come back for later. Remus heard footsteps as Logan left the ice machine area. He walked past Remus’s open motel door, likely to return to his own room. Remus dashed out behind him and grabbed his arm. One of the cuffs locked around his wrist before he could even think to react.

There was a single second of shock as he jerked his head around to look at Remus. Then, in the next second, a bucket of ice was brought down onto Remus’s head. He did not let go of Logan’s wrist as the other man was surely hoping he would. Instead, he gritted his teeth and yanked him closer.

They wrestled for a few minutes; Logan was not a fair fighter. He instantly went for the eyes, nose, and groin, but Remus somehow managed to subdue him. The other cuff snapped closed around his previously free wrist, but he was not finished. He reared back and bit Remus’s shoulder as hard as he could, drawing blood. Remus shoved his head away with a curse and began the process of dragging him to Remus’s car. He fought to get him into the car, and, not wanting to give him free range of the backseat of his personal car, Remus struggled with him until he was hooked to the interior grab handle.

The small town they were in didn’t even have a police station, so Remus started his car, intending to drive to the slightly bigger town 10 minutes away. Logan spent most of the drive cursing, rattling his restraints, and contorting himself to try to kick Remus despite that risking killing the both of them.

“Would you stop that?” Remus snapped. The answer was a sharp kick to the back of his seat. “I’m going to ask them to put you in one of the dog kennels instead of the jail cell if you’re not careful,” he threatened.

“What?”

“Yeah… the county sheriff department and the pound are in the same building. We are not in the city anymore. Guess it makes sense though. Doggy jail. People jail. Eh.”

There was a pause. “You are taking me to a police station?” Logan asked.

“Well, I’m not taking you to a Chuck E. Cheese,” Remus scoffed. There was a heavy silence following that statement. Remus glanced back at him. “What?”

“I just… After the circumstances of our first meeting, the ferocity with which you have pursued me, and the fact that we’re driving into the countryside, I had assumed I wouldn’t survive this encounter, at least on your whim.”

“What?” Remus said. “Jesus fuck, dude.”

There was nothing but sincerity in his tone when he said, “It is a reasonable prediction from what I have observed.”

“Well, I don’t know what you think you’ve ‘observed,’ but while you’re lucky I don’t drug you out of your mind and make you ride in the trunk, I’m not going to murder you and throw your body in a ditch.”

“Why wouldn’t you?” he asked, and the tone of his voice had Remus’s foot lifting off the gas. The car rolled to a stop at the side of the road.

He reached down to put the car in park. “I’m not going to hurt you,” Remus said. He turned in his seat to meet Logan’s eyes. “Look, you’re a bastard and I’m pretty pissed about the whole drugging me thing, you being two steps ahead of me for months, and the fact that you bit my shoulder a few minutes ago, but this is just an arrest.”

There was something jagged in his eyes that spoke of being wronged, and Remus wondered for the first time in his single-minded mission to bring the man down if there was something more to his story than just being a ruthless hacker and competent criminal.

“Hey,” Remus said softly. “How about something to drink?”

“Is this the drugging me out of my mind portion of the day?” Logan asked skeptically.

“Nah,” Remus replied. He leaned over the center console to the cooler he kept under the passenger seat. “I’d use a needle for that, much faster.” He sat back up. “How do you feel about iced coffee?” He shook the bottle at him.

He arched an eyebrow. “Aren’t you supposed to be taking me to a police station?”

“Always time for a nice drink.”

“I believe that ended badly for you last time,” Logan pointed out.

“I’m trying to be nice, Logan.”

“Fine,” he agreed after a moment, still eyeing Remus cautiously.

Remus gave him a toothy smile and opened the top of the iced coffee bottle with a pop.

“You first,” Logan insisted. Remus rolled his eyes and took a sip himself before offering one to Logan.

“So, where’d you disappear to in Detroit, anyway. I’ve been curious. I thought I’d lost you permanently there.”

“I have safe houses all over the country,” Logan divulged as he watched Remus take another sip. “You’d never find them.”

Remus hummed and offered him another drink. “I bet you thought I wouldn’t find you either.”

“Lucky break,” Logan replied, “and only after months of being a persistent gnat.”

“Mosquito please,” Remus requested. “At least let me be able to do some damage.”

“So, you’re a malaria carrier?” Logan asked.

“Yellow Fever. I’m a classy mosquito.” He almost chocked on the sip he was taking and Remus grinned. “Careful, if you get snot in the coffee… I’ll probably still drink it, honestly.” Logan gave him a look that teetered somewhere between amused and disgusted.

“You should probably be more careful about what you drink,” Logan said sweetly, leaning close to him so their noses almost brushed.

“And you should probably learn to not be so cheeky,” Remus said, poking him in the cheek for emphasis. He startled at the action, but then smiled a bit.

They continued bantering until the drink was finished, and then Remus tossed it into the backseat opposite Logan.

“You should get a garbage bag for your car,” Logan said, frowning down at the trash.

Remus rolled his eyes.

“I hope you know this doesn’t mean I’m not going to screw you over at the first opportunity,” Logan said lightly.

“Looking forward to it,” Remus said.

“Don’t bother.” He was vaulting over the center console into the front seat in the next moment; somehow, he had picked the handcuff lock. He went straight for the pressure point on Remus’s collarbone, but he managed to jerk back and away. Remus struggled to get the car door open and they went tumbling out. They rolled around in the grass for a few long moments before…

Click.

“Shit,” Remus said, doing his best to pull himself and the wrist with the one cuff on it away from him, but the next second he was on his stomach with a knee pressed into his back. The other handcuff snapped around his other wrist.

“How?” Remus spat.

“If it’s any consolation, I would have still gotten free without stopping. You just allowed me more time and a stopped vehicle.”

“Go fuck yourself,” Remus grumbled into the mud.

Logan rolled him over and helped him sit up. Remus glared at him. He just turned back to the open car door and searched it for a few moments before coming back out with Remus’s phone in hand.

He walked over to Remus and looked at him for a moment.

“I’m unsure if your kindness will continue if we ever meet again,” Logan said. His eyes flickered a bit and he leaned forward to press a kiss to Remus’s cheek. “I do appreciate it though and not because it allowed me to escape.” Remus blinked at him in surprise, speechless as he dialed something on Remus’s phone and then pressed it against his ear. Remus scrunched up his neck to keep it there as he heard the sound of the phone ringing. Logan turned to walk back to the car.

“911, what’s your emergency?”

Want to read more? The next installment is:

Popcorn and Podcasts

[comebeonetwothree]

Blog #8: Country Roads

07/13/2021

Currently driving through roads where pro-life billboards are placed in front of graveyards… we are officially on the road back home.

Traveling fast but seeing the most we have while covering 1,500 miles and two time zones in the last week. 900 miles to go. We jumped from Portland to northern and southern Montana then all the way through to Chicago… our last stop ;(

We met some really nice people out here- the kind of people that want to take time out of their day to interact with you. People actually smile at you and mean it when they say “have a good day.”

There were a lot of experiences this week that were indescribable. All senses were at full throttle from sleeping in the heart of Portland to camping in National Parks.

Being our last stretch of the trip, it has been hard to not feel sad when we are closing such a big chapter of our life. It’s a weird feeling of being sad but also still being so excited for the next stop. I hope the excitement doesn’t end.

Who

Who is ready to rumble…

In Portland we got to meet up with Maya’s cousin, Michael and his daughter Thea. He moved out there 13 years ago and never looked back.

He was telling us he did a similar trip with his college buddies back in the day and fell in love with the city, so moved there shortly after the trip.

Sounds fun, might fuck around and move…

Batman was ready to rumble, and fumble and everything in between. While whitewater rafting in Glacier National Park, we had the pleasure of riding with Batman The Guide. Batman, because you can’t change who you are but if you can always choose Batman.

He had been living in Montana for 17 years after moving from Oregon. He had previously worked in the park as a shuttle bus driver and recently switched over to a whitewater rafting instructor.

He was a funny fucking dude; the whole crew was super hyped but he had a comedic sense that made it an entertaining day.

While on the water, we were joking around and splashing the neighboring rafts, an independent rafter said they will bomb us with beers if we splash them. One of the other people on the boat yelled back, “Are they full beers?” and they responded by launching three full miller lite beers at our raft.

At the end of our tour, Batman gave us the three beers then we dedicated those three beers to him with a funnel.

More Friends!!! Its wild how many people we got to see throughout this trip. Hitting Yellowstone National Park, we met up with Mayas friends from home: Cole, Jamie and Declan.

They were just starting their cross-country trip from Nyack, NY, hitting the Northern route to the southern, vs our trip ending in the North. Funny coincident.

We camped out with them for two nights… it was too beautiful to just stay one night, so we pushed back our trip to badlands and stayed the extra night.

We were all out at this joint called Buffalo Bar, it had a great outdoor area with corn hole, ring toss and puppiesss. There is something so fulfilling in petting random dogs with a beer in your hand.

This one dog I was petting had an exceptional owner who was traveling him across states to bring him home. I spoke with the owner for quite a while, she was so friendly about letting me pet her dog. She really was doing it all, back at home she has three kids and two other dogs.

When people hear about our travels, their reactions usually make us realize how cool it is to have the opportunity to do a trip like this.

Many times they wish they did the same when they were our age, *cough, cough, go travel right now, cough, cough.*

This woman explained how she jumped right into working out of school and has always regretted it. Her children were already teenagers so I told her she should get out there and do it. Traveling her new dog home was a great start to the on-the-go lifestyle, she seemed to be enjoying it.

I later found out she picked up our tables tab… thank you Jennifer, you have a heart of gold and a generous soul. She explained her hopes that her kids will one day get out there and see the world like she always wished, and we were accomplishing. It was a pass it forward request, when I am able to cover the bill of a lovely traveling stranger. I hope I cross paths with this family eventually and pay it forward for her children that may travel.

What

What a reality…

The National Park pass is something you buy and are given access to all the national parks in the US. We got one in the beginning of the trip knowing we would be reaching quite a few parks. Unfortunately, we lost it after just seeing the Grand canyon.

It fell in a black hole… the area where your dashboard and windshield meet. Remember this when you put shit on the dashboard. It can slide right down to its death, the only way to get the shit out is by taking off the windshield.

Those passes are irreplaceable, of course.

In badlands, we posted up around 10 p.m. in our hammocks. It was a new experience for us, we thought hey its our last time camping, lets try it a new way. 

We set our hammocks up underneath this podium and slept there. It was perfect for a quick and easy set up/clean up. There was a solid amount of people around us, so we weren't too worried about getting attacked by coyotes again. 

Where

When driving to Portland we drove through the Redwood National Forest. This made me realize how long this Earth has been around.

Trees take a while to grow, and these trees were as thick as three full grown pine trees and as tall as two stacked on top of each other.

Neck breaking tall.

After crossing through, we hit the upper west coast and traveled on route 101 until we hit Portland. It was filled with jaw dropping views, so much so I woke Mary and Maya up every 5 minutes to show them the views. Most times it was the same view as before, just with a new massive rock to look at.

It was a relatively foggy day, so we couldn’t see certain lookout points, but there was something so majestic about the fog within the forests and hanging on the coast.

There were points where you cross over a bridge and there was nothing around you, just white. It appeared as being stuck in a dream or driving my bitchass to heaven.

Arriving in Portland, we stayed at a place in ChinaTown. It was so cute and located on top of a great deli, Charlie’s Deli.

We checked out a bunch of shops and stores while in Portland. While we were walking around, this coffee shop had the sweetest workers. They enjoyed interacting with their customers and weren’t just looking to take your money.

Portland is filled with mockingly friendly people, they weren’t mocking anyone though, they were just that fucking friendly. They actually want to converse with people... what a concept.

For dinner we went to this food truck pod place, which is about 15 different food trucks serving food, with a communal sitting area to eat the food.

We met up with Maya’s cousin there for a drink and to catch up.

Hitting Glacier National Park, we started our camping excursion. We started off sleeping in our car since we arrived late to our campground after driving 10 hours to get there. It was pretty comfortable and with the knowledge of bear attacks in the area, it was a secure place to sleep.

While in Glacier, we decided to go whitewater rafting, a whole new way of seeing the parks. It was so dope, the rapids were on the weak side since the heat waves.

After rafting, we found a great lake front public access point where we hung our hammocks up and took a nice long nap.

There are lakes EVERYWHERE here in Montana and great fishing! Let’s travel and fish all over Montana, okay? Cool.

We waited until 5 p.m. when the park lets you in without a pass, to do a sunset hike in the park. We took Going-to-the-sun road to the highline hike, where we got to see some wild animals!

In the parking lot we got to see a horned sheep (looks like a ram) and more mountain goats!! We saw three full grown goats and one baby goat.

This horned sheep actually stormed at us and we had to jump into our car. The people that parked in the spot before us left their cheetos on the ground. This guy was hungry as fuck I guess. Relentless to say the least. 

This National Park is my new favorite spot-on Earth. Spread my ashes here. Moseying through the park was a full body experience.

All your senses are involved, the smells of the forest are beyond refreshing. The touch of the crisp air brings goosebumps to your skin, and the taste of wind in your face emphasizes the overload of oxygen in that area.

There are no commercialized areas for hours outside the park. Just a fuck ton of trees.

The sounds of different birds chirping harmonizes in your ears with the wind blowing and the rocks falling below you. Your sight is spiked the highest out of the senses. These views seemed so unreal they appeared fake. When you finally touch the grounds around you, you realize how really unreal this land is.

Heading to Yellowstone the following day brought a similar element of nostalgia. We camped right outside the park, on the state border lines of Wyoming and Idaho.

Our friends we stayed with luckily still had their national park pass, so we all took our car and got into the park early that next morning. We got to see some bison! Fun Fact: Bison and Buffalos are actually the same thing.

There were so many beautiful trees and hot springs throughout the park. So many cool colors to see. We also watched Old Faithful blow her hole!!

Getting to Badlands eventually, we got a campground directly in the park. Since we got there later than five it was free. We posted up our hammocks for our last night camping on the trip ;( when we woke up, the views were so cool.

Badlands is a shit ton of clay forming giant sandcastle hills all over. But there is so much green for a desert it was an interesting combination.

When

When can we shower…

We have completed so much of the drive home its wild. We stayed in an apartment for the first two nights in Portland and then spent the rest of the week camping.

We hit our record of days without a shower… 5 full ass days. I’m so proud of Mary and Maya, they really can’t stand being dirty.

When driving long ass 10 hour plus drives for a week you find yourself enjoying nothingness. Head empty is such a vibe after jamming to music and listening to murder mystery podcasts for hours on end.

Our music ranges widely, depending on crashing periods. Whenever Mary is driving, she is either blasting screamo edm music or 2000s pop music.

Maya plays some bomb bops; I really don’t know any of the songs, but it has opened my mind to all these new artists!!

I personally love the murder mystery podcasts, there were a few times I had to change it though because it got too spooky. In the case of this week, we were driving to camp in Montana and a murder mystery came on about the Montana Child Killer… dope.

Why

I have ruled out ever living in a city. From the driving on busy ass streets to the dirty smells everywhere, I will happily reside somewhere in the country. Where? Still have no idea… Why? Because there are so many pros and cons to all these places we saw.

I guess i'll just have to come back out here!

I’m really thinking somewhere up north on the west coast. The west coast will forever hold my heart, but I really don’t have the money or the ability to live in a city out there. Maybe one day with a bombass money making job.

Coming back to the East has made me realize how much nicer people are out west and how much slower of a pace it is.

How

How are we coming up on our last spot…

We are hitting our last stop… Chicago. Shoutout to my cousin for going to school here and letting us use and abuse his apartment! Hehe just kidding we will take care of it for ya, Owen!

It feels so strange to be this close to New York. Our license plates being from New York is no longer that cool.

I’m going to miss people peeping our plates and asking us about our travels and/or wishing us luck!

Thanks everyone throughout, we are almost accomplished with this chapter!

[omgjasminesimone]

50 Travel Prompts

A/N: I’m missing being able to go places, so here are some travel themed dialogue prompts to live vicariously through.

...

1. “Excuse me, sir/ma’am! You can’t go back there without a ticket!”

2. “You need to hurry if you want to stop him/her from leaving. The flight takes off in 30 minutes.”

3. “Excuse me, I’m the middle seat.”

4. “I have been very patient with your road trip soundtrack, but this?!? This is where I have to draw the line.”

5. “I told you we should have stopped at that last gas station.”

6. “Here, take my hand. Take off is the scariest part.”

7. “So that’s it. You just hopped a bus and left me? It was that easy for you?!”

8. “Any interest in joining the mile high club?”

9. “Move, I need to stretch my legs.”

10. “I can’t believe you’re breaking up with me on an airplane!”

11. “Oh my god, I drooled all over your shoulder! I’m so sorry!”

12. “I’m not missing this flight because of you. I asked you if you had your passport like 8 times!”

13. “You won an all expense paid trip where?!”

14. “Hey, I’m going home for my nana’s birthday and my whole family wants to meet you. You can totally say no, I know this is a lot.”

15. “Hey! Stop that pickpocket!”

16. “Why are you taking a train cross country? Won’t that take days?”

17. “I am in hell. I’m never taking a greyhound bus again.”

18. “What are you doing here?” “I know you’re mad at me, but I just took three buses, a train, and then hitched a ride on the back of a truck full of chickens to get here because I needed to see you.”

19. “Jesus, how many ambiens did you take?!” “I just wanted to sleep through the flight so I wouldn’t be scared.”

20. “Is today the day we finally make it to the cruise ship gym?” “No.”

21. “....I don’t know why I let you talk me into this. We should have just done the cruise’s shore excursion.”

22. “.....I think I’m going to be seasick.”

23. “Should we stop at the world’s largest ball of twine?”

24. “Pull over. You’re falling asleep.”

25. “Sing with me! Pretend we’re on carpool karaoke!”

26. “You’re so beautiful, especially with the wind blowing through your hair and all.”

27. “Hasn’t anyone ever told you if the boat is rocking, don’t come knocking?”

28. “I met my soulmate on the subway this morning. But I didn’t get their name, or number, or speak to them at all actually.”

29. “Excuse me, is this seat taken?”

30. “I hate how much we’ve been fighting this trip. I feel like we should talk about it.”

31. “I really hope our baby doesn’t cry through the whole flight.”

32. “Hey, relax. We’re on vacation so stop being stressed out.”

33. “This is a local delicacy? You’re not messing with me, right?”

34. “It’s kind of surreal to be in the land of my ancestors.”

35. “Hey, how was your flight?” “Long, but worth it to have you in my arms right now.”

36. “Hey, calm down. It’s just a little turbulence.”

37. “Hey! Don’t lean on the ship railing like that! Are you trying to fall overboard?” “That depends. Would you jump in after me?”

38. “Uhhh, I feel like smoke coming out of the engine is a bad sign, right?”

39. “Let’s buy an RV.”

40. “Here, put this on. I’m not paying extra for an overweight bag.”

41. “I want us to meet here more than once a year.”

42. “Uhh....yeah....I was really hoping to not have my bag randomly searched. Not that I have a bomb or anything! God, I should not have just said bomb in an airport. It’s just......there’s a lot of...sex stuff in there.”

43. “I don’t want you to go home when your student visa expires....so let’s get married.”

44. “What a corny welcome home poster. I love it.”

45. “We only have enough for one ticket. Think they’ll let you sit in my lap?”

46. “Were you really going to leave without even saying goodbye?”

47. “Hey, no tears. I’m coming out to see you again in just 6 weeks.”

48. “I can’t believe the cruise confiscated my alcohol. I’m so mad.”

49. “I am absolutely not doing the Titanic thing with you.”

50. “....am I on the highway to hell?”

[therokoko]

“A bad attitude on set is deadly” - Interview with Alex Rider Director and Producer Andreas Prochaska 

Andreas Prochaska on adapting the books, casting Otto Farrant and the challenges of releasing the series in times of Corona

Based on a podcast interview with Austrian news outlet Der Standard titled “Schlechte Laune am Set ist tödlich”. I’ve translated the important bits. 

1. How he came in contact with Alex Rider: 

Well, that was relatively simple. I have an agent in England, and he sent me the script for the first episode as well as an outlook, a kind of series bible about how things were going to proceed, and I read this and thought: “This works for me. That’s something completely different.” 

I mean, especially … you mentioned “Das Boot” earlier, which was the production I worked on before, and which was burdensome in every way, I mean not only because of the time it took but also because of the topic, because we killed, I think, 26 characters in “Das Boot”, not counting extras, and of course that has an effect on you. And then I also filmed “Spuren des Bösen” [Traces of Evil, a German 8 part crime series made between 2010 and 2019, A/N), in which a mother jumps out of a window with her baby, and I was looking for something with a lighter tonality, and something which I hadn’t done before in this particular form, and “Alex Rider” was perfect for that.

I also didn’t know the book series at all. I read it completely unbiased and thought: “This is actually a cool, daring concept – so to speak somewhat exaggeratedly Coming-of-Age meets Jason Bourne....

[This job] was a result of “Das Boot” insofar as someone working for the distributor, Sonar, knew someone at Eleventh Hour – and it’s not just over here that people talk, and when someone says “listen, this guy has done a decent job, take a look” or something, that helps, and in this case it’s probable that the people became aware of me through these contacts.

2. How they approached adapting the books:

Well, it already started with the fact that our series is a mixture of the first book of the book series, namely “Stormbreaker”, and “Point Blanc” – I don’t remember right now whether that’s the second or a later book.

In Stormbreaker, the drama of the protagonist is established with the uncle who dies and the realization that this uncle wasn’t who he appeared to be. Stormbreaker had been made into a feature film which was produced by Harvey Weinstein and for which Anthony Horowitz had written the script, and that was pretty much a lead balloon. And because of that it was relatively clear that everything bad that had happened with that feature film needed to be avoided, namely that everything was totally over the top.

And my job was to [adapt] this material, which actually … I started reading the novel afterwards, and I stopped after 20 pages because I realized that that wasn’t helping me because they are actually books for 12 year olds, or at least Point Blanc is – when I read it I thought: “This is an English, better-quality version of the ‘Knickerbocker Gang’ [a German children’s book series about a group of child detectives, A/N] or something like that”. And the task was to just adapt this material for an older audience and to just draw the characters in a different way emotionally, to draw them in a more realistic way. When you look at the entire season it does occasionally reach into almost absurd spheres, but it was important for me to pave the way for the audience by starting out realistically with a protagonist that could just be the boy next door.

3. How he went about filming a spy series:  

Well, the most important thing for me in every story are the characters and to get as close to them as possible. I developed a sympathy for this unwilling hero quite quickly. And, as I said, I tried to make the surroundings as British as possible given my Austrian view of things, and to draw a character that you believe and for whom failure is always a possibility, because I find it incredibly boring when you have these superheroes and you already know that they are never in any real danger.

And this was very important to me also in working with Otto Farrant, who plays Alex, to guide him and direct him in such a way that you get the feeling that it’s possible for things to not turn out well, so that you go on this journey with him emotionally, and as to the rest it is … I don’t approach things mathematically. It’s not as if I feel: “Ok, in minute 10 this particular thing must happen, and in minute 20 this thing must happen.” For me, every story is a journey, and you try to make these journeys as good as possible following your instincts.

Like, for instance, the opening scene. In the script the villain was sitting on a roof manipulating some things on his laptop. And then the thing that happens with the man happens – I don’t want to spoil anything, because it’s actually a pretty nice surprise – and this was only 2 thin pages, and I thought: “Actually, to start this series off in an epic fashion, I’d rather like to introduce another character here, too, to charge this scene as much as possible so that you’re just drawn into this world.” And equally in episode two, that’s so to speak the episode of the test, where he has to pass the test designed to show whether he’s suited for this mission, and the script called for a hut in the woods and a road in which things happen, and I thought: “Ok, if we are dealing with a secret service, the military is not that far off.” And so I told the location scout to look for abandoned military bases, and we ended up on a former nuclear weapons base somewhere in the South of England, which made the producer sweat quite a bit because this was a relatively complex location compared to what had been in the script. But those are the things where I, as a director, can try to create visual appeal for a global audience. The series has been sold to a hundred countries, which comes with certain expectations, and of course you don’t want to disappoint these expectations.

4. On the circumstances of the release and viewer reactions: 

It came out in England in the beginning of June, which is sad, of course, because we had planned to have a premiere celebration at some festival, which wasn’t possible because of the current situation. And so this release on Amazon almost felt a little stepmotherly. So I just refreshed the link on Amazon.uk again and again to see how the people reacted to it, and there were actually many very positive reviews in a relatively short time. I think we are at 4.6 out of 5 stars at the moment, whatever that means, …

There are of course, again, total haters who only give one star and say: “What a bunch of crap.” But the majority of people seem to really like it. So hopefully, or it seems we have managed, at least in England, to … that the fans who read it as children watch it, so to speak, in retrospective joy and that they remember the times in which they read it, and still [feel like the series] adds something new.  

5. On the casting process: 

There was … even before I came on board, they made an England-wide, i.e. Britain-wide casting call. And in England, there are quite a lot of youth theatre projects, which were also contacted. And we received, I think, more than 3000 e-castings, which were screened beforehand. I still saw about 200 e-castings, and then this number was reduced bit by bit. In the end there were 3 people left in the room, one boy was from Game of Thrones, another one was very young – barely over 16, which would have been difficult -, and then, to be honest, there was only Otto. On the one hand, that was surprising because you think that there are loads of great actors in England, that it would be difficult to find the right hero, but in the end it was just very clear. It was an interesting casting situation: there was Anthony Horowitz, then there were the two executive producers from Eleventh Hour, then there was Wayne Garvey from Sony International Co-Productions, and also a casting agent from Sony America, and they all sat behind me like an assembly, and I just took the camera and worked with the actors and just tried to ignore the audience – I also felt like I was being cast again as well in my work with the actors, but … it was, yeah, it was very interesting and exciting.

I virtually grilled him for hours, tried again and again to draw the different scenes in different temperatures and with different emotions out of him, just to see what his range is and how much I would be able to work with him later on in terms of fine-tuning. Because carrying 8 episodes is an extreme challenge for a young actor, and it doesn’t help me if the boy is just dashing and then he carries only half an episode and then breaks apart. That is why it was so important to really test him thoroughly, also in combination with Brenock, who plays his best friend - we tried different combinations – and with Ronke, who plays his confidante in the household, just to try and find the right chemistry. And that was a very exciting and very satisfying process. What was really great was, when he had those three, there wasn’t any discussion anymore at all, we all agreed – I mean it would have been equally possible for Anthony to favour someone else or for Sony to like somebody else better, but it was really incredibly harmonious and unanimous.

6: On what made Otto Farrant stand out: 

Well, it was his perseverance. I mean, really, we had one scene which we really tried in 10 or 15 variations, and every time I felt that he understood where I wanted to go. To direct often means to change the temperature of a scene using only short adjectives, and for that you need someone who understands you and who can also implement that. And I just saw that he doesn’t give up that he really has stamina, and that was essentially – apart from the fact that he really comes across as incredibly natural and likeable – the deciding factor for me in the end.

7: On the responsibility of making Alex Rider and the first weeks on set: 

Well, I mean the … Alex Rider is, I mean to English fans, a promise like James Bond, on a different level. And you need someone who – and of course you need that with every film and with every series – you need an actor who touches the people emotionally, to whom they can connect. That is, of course, something you can’t … beforehand … I mean, of course you can, as we did, try everything out during the casting process, but you only know whether it really works out after a week of shooting.

And I really – especially in the first 3-4 weeks, in which I was still searching, too – I mean with every production you start on the first day of shooting and you want to throw away all the material you shot on the first day right away and start over on the next day – but he was searching, I was searching, and in a way I became – it sounds a little exaggerated right now – I became a little bit of a surrogate father during that time, because I noticed that he needed a certain type of attention and a certain security that only I as the director could give him. That is, he could come to me with every problem and with every decision concerning the character, and that worked out really well …

8. On the challenge of “carrying” a series as a lead: 

As for the “carrying”: on the one hand he has to, so to speak, function technically, i.e. he must be able to, so to speak, deliver every scene, i.e. to know the dialog, to have the right energy, and do that over the course of months - now, luckily, Otto is 21; I don’t think that would have worked with a 16 year old. And that meant that while we were shooting Otto had to read the other four scripts, which were still being written while we were shooting, and he had to comment on them and to learn them by heart, and the transition was seamless. I had to interrupt my shooting schedule for two weeks because we had a location that was only available at a specific time, and so I left the set and flew to Austria to start the cutting process, and on the next day the other director came in and just kept working with him. That means Otto had to adapt to the other director, and that’s a challenge for every actor, but especially for a young actor. ...

I [as a director] could only keep it together up to a certain point in time, until my episodes where done shooting. [...] And of course, when the lead actor is in a bad mood when he comes to the set in the morning, that is at least as bad as when I come to the set in a bad mood. That emanates in all directions. So the strength of character of someone, who also knows … I mean, he doesn’t know yet about the power he may have in the second or third season, when he maybe becomes executive producer or I don’t know … but [it’s important] that you, as a human being, just treat everyone with respect in such an environment.

Source: Der Standard AT 

[whatdoesshedotothem]

Thursday 5 July 1838

4 50

10 5

awaked 2 or 3 times during the night, so terribly bit by something – had slept between my 2 cloaks (my old maclean plaid and 8 years old green and black Paris merinos) – my artillery man, lance-corporal Colin Morrison, an Edinburgh man, was waiting for me – a fine looking soldier-like, civil man of apparently 24 or 25 – very fine morning – off at 6 – soon passed the little fortified gate (drawbridge and double trench) out of the town, leaving (left) the sandy inlet and the long bridge over the river (Urumea) and the road to Passages – we soon passed thro’ the ruined village (vide line 2 above) and pursued our road by a steepish ascent towards Hernani distant 4 English miles – about a mile or more from St. Sebastian, a fort, (left) on the hill [manned] by Spanish soldiers – hilly road – hilly country – but not much wood beyond bush wood – Colin talked all the way and explained their positions at the useless siege of Hernani – for what have the chistianos got by it? merely a little more elbow-room about St. Sebastian and a walk of 4 miles into the country – nothing else – the carlists are still all roundabout – the Christianos destroyed the convents and village and houses about St. Sebastian for fear of their affording shelter to the carlists – whatever the carlists do, the xtians and British Legion rob just as much – and Colin has often been ashamed even for our artillery (about 120 men at St. Sebastian but entered as marines because we have no right to send a land force tho’ everybody sees thro’ this flimsy subterfuge) – Colin has seen our artillery ordered to go to the different villages 8 or 10 miles off and take even the very beds the people slept and what was worse oblige them to carry their own things thus plundered to St. Sebastian – the artillery men are quite sick of all this – but the officers wish to stay – they like to be on service – and the commandant has extra allowances and Lord John Hay has £6 a month extra for table money as commodore etc. etc. – Colin cannot like the Spaniards – they have no heart – give us no thanks whatever we do for them – They think they can do anything and everything, and can do very little – will not stir themselves more ambition than the English but not courage to follow it – they themselves (the Xtianos) could have done nothing at Hernani without the English -  the Carlists fight better – never saw men behave better than some of them did at Hernani – but they are all light armed – have nothing but musquettry  - or else he agreed with me they might easily take even St. Sebastian by a corp de main and Hernani – I see nothing to prevent it – the 200 or 300 of the British legion at Hernani, look miserable – whatever happens they are always put into the worst quarters and have the worst of everything and cannot get paid – they live on their rations and plunder and as they can – they had confidence in the bravery of general Evans, but not in his talent – he brought the artillery into action at Hernani much too close to the enemy’s fire – if Don Carlos had had any artillery, all our men would have been blown to pieces – Hernani a poorly walled little fortified town, Colin said of about 500 inhabitants – 1 longish narrow street opening into a little grande place and one or 2 little side streets – more picturesque than good – a few of the houses handsomely carved on the gable front towards the street and seeming to have been inhabited by better sort of people – porte cochère into large room where stood carts or what not and au fond the large wide stone (handsome perhaps if clean) staircase – altogether Spanish – walked thro’ the town to the last xtiano guard perhaps ¼ mile from the town – 4 or 5 men there one with a telescope watching the carlists in force on the opposite hill, and taking care that the last xtiano sentry at a house a little distance below us was not surprised – the women with the legion are chiefly if not all Irish – I saw the serjants’ wife bargaining in the street – she contrives to do pretty well for she washes etc. for the men, and when they got paid she gets something, and they can live on her husbands’ rations and her allowance of ½ ditto – I think Colin said they had per man 1lb. beef (very good considering) 1lb. bread 1/4lb. cheese – I forgot what of potatoes and I think a gill of rum – 20 or more above proof – would bear 4 water and still be as strong as our rum in England – the artillery have all this for 5d. English and Colin said they (the artillery) could sell it to the [pursuer] at St. Sebastian if they chose for 10d. that is the price it cost him at St. Sebastian – a road direct from Hernani along the valley to Passages but not open because the middle part of it in possession of the carlists – or I should have liked to walk the round back this way to St. Sebastian – 12000 of the legion at Passages – 12 companies with 4 officers to each = 48 that is the colonel and major and two more I forget what he called them – I had thought of breakfasting at Hernani – Luisa had said there was a café there where I could breakfast – but seeing no signs of it, I said nothing but turned back – off from St. S- at 6 at the last guard (about 1/4mile out of Hernani) at 7 35 and back again at the fonda at St. S- at 9 10 having just gone on the ramparts to see the breach made under the d. of Wellington – breakfast immediately – café au lait – I was thirsty and thought the warm breakfast would quite refresh – the café seemed to have a queer taste – took the milk by itself – it was hardly down before it was up again! (surely it was goats’ milk which never did and perhaps never will agree with me) – lay down for 50 minutes till 10 and was dozing when the Captain rapped at my door – said I had not breakfasted but should be ready in ¼ hour – I had luckily brought up my wine from dinner last night – ate a little bit of bread and drank a little wine and water which did very well for me – had Luisa up and got her to write

SH:7/ML/E/21/0141

me out the bill – myself 20 réals – George 12 reals and 4 reals = 1 piastre or 1 franc .:. my bill was just 8 fr. – gave la fille 1 piastre or franc (took it from George who had exchanged a 5fr. piece) and in paying Madame veuve Iriarte gave her two 5fr. pieces saying that the 2 fr. over where for Mademoiselle Luisa – at the quai in 2 or 3 minutes but no captain – waited for him 20 minutes and embarked and put off from the jetty at St. Sebastian at 11 40 – dawdled a little in the port for one of our rowers (3 now instead of 4 as in coming) to pick up a bottle of wine or something – we were now myself and George our captain and 3 rowers – doubled the rock island to the westward as in entering and rowed 20 minutes till 12 – then hoisted 2 sails and went I should suppose at the rate of 5 knots an hour – a good deal of surf (considering the fineness of the day) under the citadel-rock and between this and the rock-island – we had considerably less to the westward of the island under the tower fort which Colin had told me they (our men) fortified without ever receiving anything for their labour – they did a great deal of work at first – they understood our government set all down to the Spanish debt – yes! said I, but Spain will never pay I think – In sight of Passages at 12 35 – sick at 1 ¼ - again at 2 ¼ and Fontarabia in sight at 2 35 – St. Sebastian-citadel, and rock-island, and tower fort – Passanges – all high green rock to the bay of Fontarabia (i.e. to the striking projecting rock called Pointe de Figuier [Figueres?]) – at the French end of it (north side of this bay as I call it, of Fontarabia – embouchure of the Bidassoa) red rock head looked at a distance like a red-tiled town – then while from this end all the way to St. Jean de Luz – land at 3 50 at St. Jean de Lux near the douane – the solider or douanier seemed afterwards ½ ashamed to have questioned me about my little packet of night things but I went in and opened it out – a good deal of surf in entering the little harbour at the embouchure of the little river Nivelle – I can well believe the difficulty and danger of getting in a bad weather – soon walked to the Inn – M. Junca and all glad to see me – followed me to A-‘s door, as if to see the happy meeting – but they fell back for all was deadly still – poor A- was poorly and all had seemed more glad to see [me] back than she – I had thought to try the land-way or at least go to the frontier, and stand on the bridge between the French sentry at one end and the Spanish at the other – no danger or difficulty so far – but A- wanted to be off immediately back to Bayonne – a diligence would go at 5 – But I fell faint – ordered a mutton chop – had it in the salle à manger and M. Junca and Conigo and others came round me – M. Junca had discovered that I was carlist – found it out from my manner on embarking yesterday – Conigo a contrebandier – M. Junca the means of getting formation for Mr. Mitchell  shewed me one of the notes Mr. M- pays him weekly I think for conveyance of messengers M. Junca a very good sort of little man – said I had trusted him and he would do the best he could for me – paid Conigo the 50/. as agreed and gave him 5/.  over for his crew – all parted good friends – the diligence, an omnibus à 6 places de chaque coté  (12 persons) horsed by M. Junca – about 7 persons besides A- and myself and George 6 women and a boy inside, and a gentleman on the box outside with the cocher – waited ¼ for us – off at 5 ¼ at the barrier at 7 ¼ - to leave our passport and take a receipt for it – I got impatient of waiting, and A- and I walked to our hotel St. Etienne – 12 minutes and arrived there at 7 ½ - ordered dinner – then had Josephine to do my hair at 7 50 – then a minute or 2 with A- all had heard of A-‘s not going to St. S- our coachman had not returned when she got back to St. Jean de Luz – poor M. Junca had looked after us, and not seeing the boat (while he turned aside we had put into the port of Socoa to land A-) was quite alarmed was just going to give orders for sending out after us when he saw A- returning and heard what had happened – A- said she had not got back till 5, and if I had not left her the umbrella could not have got back at all – the people told me she had got back between 3 and 4 – however I thanked heaven she had turned back – she could not have borne the boating and the impossibility of getting her anything comfortable at St. S- would have been terrible – with her a minute or two after my hair was done but I soon came to my room and wrote  the following in pencil in my little note book  she means to trouble everybody as little as she can will do for herself   I gently said well if you can do better I shall be very glad   I saw before she was all wrong and guessed the nature of her illness  it is astonishing how little I care  I was guiltless of thinking of her yesterday or this morning till my arrival   when at the moment I forgot my anticipations and ran up to the people and then to her I was soon set right  how different my last reception on returning from Spain to Lady S. de R-! dinner at 8 ½ to 9 25 and then had Josephine ¼ hour very fine day tho’ a light shower just before leaving St. Jean de Luz F71 ½° at 9 55

[chris-evans-indian-fanfic]

Across Seven Seas

Chapter 3

Description: This fanfiction series is set in the year 2022, after the horrid COVID-19 has finally come to an end. In this fanfiction, Chris Evans holidays with his family in India and meets Meera Shankar. The story explores their rollercoaster journey and raises a question, whether two people, from two contrasting backgrounds and cultures, can build their future together?

This series is Chris Evans x OFC with Chris Evans' family and friends having recurring appearances. Please find below a lot of Original Characters-

Meera Shankar - The female lead

Meera's Mother

Poppy - Meera's maternal grandmother

Rohan - Meera's elder brother who is 6 years older than her.

Ankur - Concierge of the Hotel Maple-Fawn in Mussoorie

Chapter 1 • Chapter 2

Chapter 4

FIND MORE CHAPTERS BY CLICKING ON MY BIO

P.S- India follows only one timezone.

P.P.S- All the photographs used in the chapters are of the real locations mentioned. I clicked these photographs on my vacation.

This is a work of fiction. The names of the hotels and companies have been changed to avoid copyright issues. Meera Shankar and her family is based on the author and her kin. No offense is intended.

I don’t consent to have any of my work published or featured on any third party app, website or translated. If you are seeing this fanfiction anywhere but tumblr, it has been reposted without my permission. In that case, please do share the link and let me know.

...

Chapter 3

6th September, 7:30am - Dehradun Hotel, India

Meera barely noticed the morning chatter at the breakfast table, the voices becoming dull thuds in her mind. As she dozed off for the tenth time, her mother snapped. "You just woke up Meera! How can you still be sleepy? People in the mornings are usually active, bright-eyed and alert! Yet here you are going back to sleep." "Who said I slept last night?" spoke Meera, unsuccessfully trying to stifle her yawn, "With you and Poppy snoring into my ears, I could hardly sleep." "We don't snore that bad," said her mother, defensively. "Have you ever hear... (yawn) Have you ever even heard yourself snore?" replied a sleepy Meera. "I slept peacefully in my room. Just like a baby," Rohan chimed in with a smug smile. Her sleep deprived brain could not think of a clever repertoire. At least she would fall asleep on the ride to Mussoorie, hopefully avoiding the nasty motion sickness.

6th September, 9:15am - Delhi, India

🎶tring, tring, tring, tring🎶

Chris heard the faint chime of the landline in his room. Struggling to find it in the darkness, Chris finally answered the call. The receptionist on the other end of the line was kind. She patiently reminded him about the wake-up call that had been scheduled by him and informed him about the buffet breakfast. The Evans family had reached the fancy hotel in the wee hours of the morning. It had been a relief to exit the Delhi airport sans the company of the media. Jet-lagged and exhausted, they had all collapsed into their beds. Even Chris had fallen asleep as soon as his head had touched the pillow. He now stretched on the bed, missing the warmth of his adorable canine. He knew the best way to deal with jet-lag was to condition your body to the local timezone. After freshening up, he headed towards the buffet, seeking to eat his breakfast in peace.

As there were no direct flights from Boston to Dehradun, they had decided to stay for a day in Delhi, just to rest their bones. Tomorrow, they would catch the flight to Dehradun. As Chris understood, their hotel in Mussoorie was around 6 hours away from Dehradun airport. He did not look forward to the excessive travel. He knew they would all be tired out for a week before they started feeling normal again.

He was soon joined by his family for breakfast. A large family of 7 Americans was not an unusual sight for the patrons of this hotel. Being one of the most luxurious and expensive hotels in the city, tourists from across the world flocked to the 5-star property. The best part? Nobody recognized them, especially Chris. While Chris did have a huge fan following in India, he was not immediately recognisable with his large beard and overgrown hair.

"Do we have anything planned for today?" Chris confirmed with Carly as she demolished her pancakes, "Not really. The hotel did offer a tour of the local tourist hotspots, but I didn't think anyone would be up for a day out." "Especially in this heat," chimed in Shanna. "From what I Google searched, Delhi has beautiful forts and structures. There are even expansive gardens in the city! Maybe we can visit just one site before leaving tomorrow?" suggested their mother Lisa. "I will check with the concierge and see what they recommend," offered Scott.

Chris settled back in his room after the breakfast, checking-in with Tara about Dodger. He dozed off while waiting for a reply.

Same day, 11:40pm - Dehradun-Mussoorie road

Meera woke up with a jerk as the car pulled around a corner, her heart beating fast. They were on the last portion of the winding roads, almost at the top of the hill. Dazed, she looked around the SUV, her mother and brother were wide awake and Poppy had nodded off. From the window, Meera saw the mountains and trees in all their glory, but the motion of the car lulled her exhausted mind back to sleep.

Almost 20 minutes later, she woke up again as her mother gently taped her on the shoulder. "We have reached," she quietly said, "Are you feeling okay?" Blinking her eyes, Meera managed to say yes. Chilly breeze greeted her as she opened the door of the car. Audibly shuddering, she shut the door, reluctant to leave the warm vehicle. Her brother pulled it open again, "Wake up sleepy head! Look how beautiful it is!" "It is COLD," replied Meera hoarsely, still struggling to find her bearings. "Okay look, it is just 10 steps from the car to the hotel's entrance. Just 10 steps! Then you will be in nice toasty-warm lobby. Let's go! The hills are calling us! Let's go let's go!!" Meera smiled at her brother's exuberance. Mountains had the same effect on him that beaches had on her. Bracing herself for the cold, Meera dashed from the car and into the hotel.

Maple-Fawn was one of the few 5-star hotels in Mussoorie. The international company had a chain of hotels in the country, but their property at this hill-station had been voted as one of the bests. The lobby section was intimidating to say the least. White marble flooring, polished wood-panelled walls, and elegant paintings and statues gave a sophisticated, warm vibe. As the family was checking-in, the male concierge asked for Meera, "Welcome to Maple-Fawn everyone. Do we have a Mrs Meera Shankar amongst us?" "It is Ms Meera Shankar, and that would be me," she replied. "Hello ma'am. I am Ankur, the resident concierge of this property. As I am led to believe, you are the one with the food allergies, correct?" "Yes absolutely." "We received your email ma'am, the one with the list of foods you are allergic to, and a couple of recipes which would suit you. Can we discuss it once you are settled-in?" "Oh right yes. How about we meet again after one hour?" "Sure ma'am. I will meet you with the chef in your room," confirmed Ankur.

The receptionist handed them the key cards to their rooms. "As I can see in the system, you have booked two rooms, with the 3 women living in one room and Mr Rohan living in another. Would you like to have a single bed mattress in your room ma'am? It would be more comfortable," suggested the receptionist. As her mother refused after hearing the cost for the extra mattress, Meera had to chuckle. Even the receptionist must have wondered how will 3 fat women fit on a queen-sized bed, she thought.

"Why should we spend so much money on a mattress when we call all sleep together on the same bed?" argued Meera's mother as they reached their rooms, "We have already spent so much on this expensive hotel, I am certainly not paying for anything extra." Meera's face fell as she heard those words. It had been difficult to find a hotel which would cater to her food allergies. While various brands offered food for people who were strictly vegetarian or vegan, the hotel staff, usually the chefs, could never wrap their minds around how could a person be allergic to so many things. Luckily, Maple-Fawn had been accommodating, but being on the upper-end luxurious side of things, the stay at the hotel itself had costed them around 4 months of Rohan's salary. "I will get to snuggle-up to my daughter on the same bed and sleep. I can't wait!" continued Meera's mother. "Creep," muttered Meera.

But despite herself, Meera had to admit, the view from their room was to die for...

Same day, 3pm - Delhi

Chris awoke to someone ringing the doorbell of his room. Stumbling across the room in the darkness, he opened the door to see Carly. "Hey Chris, we are going to Rori gardens, do you want to tag along?" "What? Which gardens?" "Rori, or something like that. I don't understand most of the names here," sheepishly admitted Carly. "Should I show you the brochure?" Nodding his reply, Chris stepped aside to let Carly in. "Oh God, it is dark in here, let there be light!" "No wait sto..." But before Chris could finish his sentence, Carly had opened the curtains, flooding the room with bright sunlight. "Aargh" Chris groaned at the sudden light, hidding under the covers on his bed. Laughing, Carly tried to pull the covers off of him, but Chris held on tight. "C'mon you big baby! You are worse than your niece and nephews! Even they are playing in the swimming pool and here you are, hiding underneath the covers!" "It's too bright! Turn down the sun!" Chris whined. "No way! Get up now! See this garden looks like fun. Don't stay held up in your room." Chris muttered something. "Christopher Evans, come out now or else I WILL tickle you!" Carly threatened. Uncovering his head, Chris opened one eye, "What do you want, you Kraken monster?!" Carly smiled, it had been too long since Chris had called her by the nickname. A change of location was maybe just what he needed afterall.

Chris met Carly, Scott and Lisa in the lobby, Shanna choosing to stay behind with the kids. Their hotel, Maple-Fawn, had provided them with a guide and comfortable cars. If Chris wasn't mistaken, they were going to stay at the brand's property in Mussoorie as well. "What is the name of the garden again?" Chris asked their Guide. "They are called Lodhi Gardens," came the prompt reply. "It is spread over 90 acres and contains some of the best landscaping seen here in Delhi. The garden is also home to tombs of various kings who had once ruled Delhi." "Oh so it's a graveyard," inquired Scott excitedly. Chris chucked at his brother's excitement. "Not at all sir," replied their Guide, "The garden is used as a park, where people jog, do yoga, exercise and kids play around. You will get an idea once we reach."

While the road to Lodhi Gardens had been full of traffic and commotion, the place itself was peaceful and serene. Tall trees surrounded the walkways, manicured green lawns with flower beds covered the uneven terrain, while the graves of the bygone kings were nothing like the Evans family had seen before. These were ancient structures, with delicate ornate carvings on the walls. "Woah," whispered Scott, "If these are their graves, then I can't even imagine how royal their palaces must have been!"

Chris caught himself smiling. As much as he willed himself not to feel happiness, he couldn't help but feel a little bit relaxed. Lodhi Gardens were beautiful.

[sirsapling]

MORE TAGGED POSTS

I got tagged in a bunch more things I didn't respond to fast enough, so UNDER THE CUT THEY GO. 

I have too many things to respond to, so I won't be tagging, but consider yourself tagged if you want to do any.

IT’S THE LITTLE THINGS

Tagged by the wonderful @bardingbeedle​

Pass the happy!🌻🌿 When you receive this, list 5 things that make you happy and send this to 10 of the last people in your notifications!

Lying in warm blankets in an cold room. Bonus points for snow outside.

A fresh Buzz cut

Talking to @bardingbeedle​

Having long, passionate rambles about the Marvel Ultimates

Hashbrowns, bacon, maple syrup, maybe a pancake, and a sausage too.

Tagged by the chaotic @s-hylor​

top 3 cities you want to visit: Toronto, again. Colorado (I know its a state not a city I just want to visit ashes AND GET SNOW). And I would like to go back to Italy again. (I also want to visit, just, all of my fandom friends but I don't want to drop all their locations lol)

favorite marvel character: Ults!Steve Rogers and then Ults!Tony Stark. Not counting stony, Anthony the brain tumor, and not counting clones, Gregory Stark.

white chocolate - yay or nay?: Love it, love it, love it.

favourite board game: God Save The Queens- A board game about Bees I invented with 3 other people at University last year for a project.

how many countries have you been to: 10, I have been very luckily graced with the ability to travel to Europe with school a lot.

(Wales, France, Belgium, Germany, Switzerland, America [Florida, Boston, New York], Spain, Portugal, Italy, and finally Canada.)

favorite thing to do on a rainy day: Anything indoors I might usually feel guilty about doing when its sunny. Tv or games particularly

favorite holiday: Christmas. I am a Christmas slut, call me festive sapling I LOVE Christmas.

pen or pencil: Pen. I once bought 7 in lisbon at the same time bc they were perfect and I didn't want to run out.

favourite kind of soup: Cupasoup Chicken noodle, I don't really like soups tbh, I like broths, and gravy type things I make too much of and eat like a soup (like golden Currys or korma sauces)

your typical order at a cafe or coffee shop: Caramel Frappucino or an iced Mocha. If I'm gonna pay a fuck tonne for coffee I'm gonna get a drinkable dessert.

favorite ride at an amusement park: Any slow rides that show you shit, like spaceship earth at EPCOT. I’m not really a speed dude.

the color of your sneakers: RED, red shoes are the shit folks, a good pair of red converse goes with everything.

favorite pbs show (or little kids show if you didn’t have pbs):  Uh I used to watch pokemon then winnie the pooh every single night. But little little kids show I used to watch a show called 64 zoo lane with my grandma so I have fond memories

Rules: name your favorite female characters from 10 different fandoms, then tag 10 people.

Tagged by the wonderful @ashes0909​

Natasha Romanov - Marvel Cinematic Universe

Carol Danvers - Marvel 616

Janet Van Dyne - Marvel Ultimates

Izumi Curtis - Full Metal Alchemist

Martha Jones - Doctor Who

Garnet - Steven Universe (if she doesn't count bc, space rock, Connie)

Rosa Diaz - Brooklyn 99

Ann Perkins  - Parks and Rec

Princess Caroline - Bojack Horseman

Pam Poovey - Archer

LOOK I know there was a lot of cheating here, but I don't have non marvel fandoms really, and I have a hard time remembering a lot of the TV I enjoyed.

Rules: Share your top 10 AO3 additional tags. Tagged by the mysterious @nigmuff​

look I don't know if I have enough tags to make this a justified representation, but the ones shown are v much on brand.

Fanfic trope meme

I was tagged by the delightful @capnstars​ and @crownofstardustandbone​

slowburn or love at first sight // fake dating or !!!secret dating!!! // enemies to lovers or best friends to lovers // oh no there’s only one bed or long-distance correspondence // hurt/comfort or amnesia // fantasy au or modern au // mutual pining or domestic bliss // smut AND fluff // canon-compliant or fix-it  // reincarnation or character death // one-shot or multi-chapter // kid fic or road trip fic // arranged marriage or accidental marriage // high school romance or !!!!middle-aged romance!!! // time travel or isolated together // neighbours or roommates  // sci-fi or magic au // body swap or genderbend  // angst or crack // apocalyptic or mundane

Look guys, I’m boring. I like domestic 30-40 year olds in secret relationships. We knew this.

And now buckle the fuck down folks because I'm about to answer 50 questions about me no one is gonna stick around and read.

tagged by @bardingbeedle​ the only person who would put up with reading this much about me.

What is the colour of your hairbrush?

I have a buzz cut, I don't have a hair brush anymore.

Are you typically too warm or too cold?

Too warm. I have been warmer than most people my whole life, and I often need to sleep with a fan on.

What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

Working on a sketch for an MTH fill (update from the end of this: I have spent an hour doing this fuckin thing)

What is your favourite candy bar?

Bounty. My favourite candy is Reese’s Pieces but I like a bounty. Or like, and chocolate without fruit in it tbh.

Have you ever been to a professional sports event?

Yes, one of my parents referees Championship Football here in the UK. I have been to a few of his games. I also went to the London 2012 Paralympic closing ceremony, if that counts.

What is the last thing you said out loud?

‘Oh, this will last me a few days’ I was talking to my mother about 1/2 a can of pringles, I was lying.

What is your favourite ice cream?

Vanilla. I am boring. But the best ice cream i’ve had was a cream/milk flavoured gelato in Florence, that shit slapped. I also like cheap strawberry ice cream when no one is trying to put strawberry bits in it.

What was the last thing you had to drink?

Dinner. A spinach, banana, summer fruits and coconut yoghurt smoothie (with extra raspberries). Its my nightly dinner to cheat more veg into my body.

Do you like your wallet?

Very much. It’s about 7-8 years old, it is faded to hell but it has spiderman and a pony ride stony pin

What was the last thing you ate?

See above smoothie comment, but if that doesn't count, a sugar free mint polo.

Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?

Nope. I don't buy as many clothes as I want to, bc mens clothes in larger sizes are hard to find or expensive here.

The last sporting event you watched?

F1, I don't keep up but I watch a little with my dad every now and then.

What is your favourite flavour of popcorn?

BUTTER. They don't really have it here, and I don't go to movies much when in the states. But @festiveferret​ introduced me to it when we saw Ant-man and the Wasp, and much like poutine and Tim Hortons, I still crave it.

Who is the last person you sent a text message to?

My dad. 

Ever go camping?

Yes, I was a Scout. I have done enough camping to not want to do more, it was fun when I wasn't organising it.

Do you take vitamins?

Yes, but not as often as I should, and as much as my mother bothers me too.

Do you go to church every Sunday?

Nope, not even when I considered myself christian. I go only go to church for other peoples events, and I’m an agnostic now.

Do you have a tan?

I cannot tan. I just can't, I burn lobster red in 5 minutes outside without literal sun cream for BABIES

Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?

Chinese food, It was easily what taught me to like more foods also, I don't eat tomato so I can't have most pizza. I love a good garlic base/bechamel, but you can't really get that here easily (yes yes I could make my own but that ruins half the point of pizza)

Do you drink your soda with a straw?

I don't drink carbonated drinks, because its like drinking pain. The fuck is wrong with all of you.

What colour socks do you usually wear?

Various colours, but I consider red on the left, blue on the right, my lucky socks. No I don't know why, but I take all exams and interviews wearing them. It’s just a thing.

Do you ever drive above the speed limit?

I don't drive, but if I did, No. Theres a lot of questionable laws out there but Traffic laws aren't one of them.

What terrifies you?

Pfft, most things from spiders to rollercoasters. But more seriously, Being shouted at. Shout at me and I start hyperventilating, its a thing. Also not knowing if someone is mad at me. I’m not good at reading people,

Look to your left, what do you see?

The wallet shown earlier, and the sugar free polos mentioned after that.

What chore do you hate?

Vacuuming. It makes everything in my body hurt. I would rather clean toilets.

What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?

@s-hylor​

What’s your favourite soda?

See above. I do not like your pain liquid. Apple juice for life.

Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thrus?

Either delivery or kiosk, I don't like talking to people where possible, I often need tweaks I don't want to have to remember to repeat.

Who’s the last person you talked to?

@downeyhills​

Favourite cut of beef?

I don't generally eat beef, lamb, or most red meats. I love crispy chilly beef, but as anyone can point out its bc your generally don't feel the texture of the beef.

Last song you listened to?

Everybody Wants to Rule the World | Tears for Fears | Pomplamoose

I’m on a Pomplamoose kick, and I also just love this song anyway.

Last book you read?

Understanding Comics (The invisible Art) - Scott McCloud

Favourite day of the week?

Friday nights. The weekend is ahead and @loraneldin​ and I take to wrangling our beloved usual suspects through another week of Ults Book Club.

Can you say the alphabet backwards?

I can barely say it forwards.

How do you like your coffee?

With milk and sugar, or ultimately, in a Caramel Frappuccino bc I'm a bitch like that.

Favourite pair of shoes?

I have walking boots that don't make my flat ass feet feel like they’re dying. OR my black and green crocs (Fight me, they’re useful).

The time you normally go to sleep?

9-10 is what I'm working on, but I fluctuate depending on if I'm working on something or not.

The time you normally get up?

5-6 If I have a choice in the matter, but often 7-8 if I didn't get to bed at the right time. I’m more about getting the right hours in for my diet than time specifically.

What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets?

Sunset is the prettiest, but I like to be awake to see the sun rise.

How many blankets on your bed?

One big thick comforter, because that's the uk standard, and I get too hot otherwise.

Describe your kitchen plates

Two types, big wide white ones with a navy blue rim. They are so large I never use them, and little Navy saucer plates I use a lot.

Do you have a favourite alcoholic beverage?

I don't drink, so no. I drink apple juice or Shirley temples when I'm in pubs/bars

Do you play cards?

Sometimes, I like to teach people to play Old Maid. It’s the monopoly of card games.

What colour is your car?

Again, I do not drive. 

Can you change a tire?

I am aware I just said I don't have a car, but I do know how to change a tire. Everyone should go learn its pretty simple.

Favourite job you’ve ever had?

I have only had one job really and two job experience jobs. I did experience in a school library for a week and that was v fun and chill. I did all the jobs they had prepared for me in 2 days so I alphabetically reorganised their fiction section for the rest of the week. I LIKE ORDERING.

How did you get your biggest scar?

I no longer have a gallbladder, so I have 3 scars across my torso from that, the biggest right in the middle of my ribs. Non surgical wise I have matching scars on my knees from ripping holes in them when tripping. I have weak ankles and also I got both of those at different times.

What did you do today that made someone else happy?

I gave my spare animal crossing Iguanodon skull to a wicked artist I follow on twitter so he could complete his dino park. 

[bunkershotgolf]

Circling Raven Golf Club Extends Value-Priced Rate through April; More than 40% Off Peak Cost Coeur d’Alene Casino Resort Hotel Amenity Maintains Green Fees at $55

Circling Raven Golf Club, the state’s No. 1 ranked public course, will maintain the 18-hole round fee at $55 per player through April, a supreme value considering the peak season rate is $109.

“This is a win-win for players and the golf club,” said David Christenson, PGA, Circling Raven Director Golf. “Golfers can enjoy one of the country’s top courses at a great price, do so amidst the superb beauty that we’re fortunate to be set within, and enable us to provide relaxing recreation for people.”

The $55 greens fee is a savings of nearly 40%. Beginning on May 1, green fees will increase to the Spring Rates ($89 Monday-Thursday, $99 Friday-Sunday and holidays). Peak season rates ($99 and $109) commence on May 21.

To enhance safe practices at Circling Raven, the following protocol is currently in place:

For safety, each player will be the only one touching his/her equipment upon arrival and throughout your visit. Guests have the option to ride or walk the course currently, and they can use a personal push-pull cart if so desired. If riding, we allow one Circling Raven golf cart per person. (Carts are not permitted in the parking lot due to insurance purposes).

No more than ten customers are allowed in the clubhouse at one time.  When approaching the counter, individuals must maintain six feet of social distance, as outlined by tape on the floor. This holds for anywhere on the property.

Food and beverage offerings include to-go orders at the service window on the back deck.  The dining room and bar are closed for inside seating.  To place an order from Twisted Earth Grill on the 9th hole, for pick up at the turn, call 800.523.2464 (ext. 7263).

Tee times are set at 10-minute intervals to promote safe distancing. Golf carts are allowed on the course paths only currently.  Bunker rakes have been removed. Flagsticks are to remain in the cup, and cups have been raised above the putting surface. Our local rule is, when the player’s ball touches the cup and remains within one club length, the putt is considered holed. If the ball deflects against the raised cup and settles outside one club length, another attempt is required.

On course restrooms are open and sanitizing stations are provided inside the clubhouse and at both restroom locations on the golf course.  These can be found at hole nos. 5 and 14.  Extra sanitizing maintenance is being provided in all areas of the business to ensure we are providing the safest environment for your enjoyment.  

For more information, visit www.cdacasino.com/golf or call 800-523-2464.

About Circling Raven/Coeur d’Alene Casino Resort Hotel Owned and operated by the Coeur d’Alene Tribe, Circling Raven is in Northern Idaho, approximately 50 minutes from Spokane International Airport (GEG). Measuring 7,189 yards from the rear tees, the 18-hole layout sprawls magnificently through 620 acres of woodlands, wetlands, and Palouse grasses. Circling Raven’s gleaming white sand bunkers are large and strategically placed, and its variety of holes is tremendous. The Symetra “Road to the LPGA” Tour will compete in the Circling Raven Championship Aug. 24-30 this season, a worthy test for the world’s top aspiring professional women golfers. Many who play Circling Raven equally enjoy the vast, 25-acre driving range, a nationally honored golf shop, and the excellent Twisted Earth restaurant with bar at the clubhouse.

Coeur d’Alene Casino Resort amenities and activities include the full-service Spa Ssakwa’q’n (SOCK-wah-kin); a variety of hotel rooms and suites; bars, restaurants, lounges, and eateries; cultural immersion options, and more. The casino completed a multi-million-dollar renovation in Spring 2019.

[wildflowerirwin]

You’re The Only Reason Why - m.c.

Summary: Ashton wants to clap alien cheeks, Michael wants to find meaning

Words: 2k

Warnings: none

Dedicated to the beautiful and courageous @dontdoitluke

Touring the United States was something they all enjoyed. Touring in general was something each of them enjoyed, actually. For Michael, something felt different about this tour. He wasn’t sure what exactly made this tour so special, but he felt like each show had been better than the last. Not a single bad show, not a single thing he would change. “Pack it in, boys. It’s a long ride from Colorado to Oklahoma.” Katt said, ushering the boys onto their bus. “We’ll see you in Oklahoma City.” She waved them off and closed the bus door.

“How far is the drive?” Ashton asked, settling into the couch.

“Google says 10 hours.” Luke answered, climbing into his bunk. “No one bother me for 10 hours.” He said, pulling his curtain closed.

“Only bother you for 10 hours?” Michael joked. “I’ve got more than enough planned.”

“Liar. You’re gonna sit on the couch and play Fortnite.” Luke scoffed and pulled his stuffed penguin out from under his pillow.

“Yeah, probably.” Michael chuckled, grabbing the controller. The ride began without a hitch. Luke fell asleep in his bunk, the penguin tucked securely in his arms. Ashton laid on the couch with his eyes closed and arms folded, his AirPods playing the latest true crime podcast. Calum sat in the back of the bus, quietly talking to his mother on the phone. Michael was having trouble focusing on his game, his eyes continuously roaming to the window where he watched the fields race beside them.

He finally set his controller down, turning to watch out the window. His chin rested in the palm of his hands as his elbows rested on the back of the couch. He was enamored with his view. Corn fields followed by bean fields, followed by more corn. It wasn’t often they got to see this part of the country, and it seemed only Michael cared to take it in. “The hell kind of road are we on?” Ashton asked, sitting up and pulling his AirPods out of his ears.

“Looks like rocks, but it’s very bumpy.” Michael said, still looking out the window.

“I believe it’s called gravel.” Calum said, joining the two of them at the front of the bus. The three of them looked at each other when a pop sounded from outside the bus.

“That didn’t sound good.” Ashton said, looking out the window with Michael.

“What happened?” Luke asked, poking his head out of his bunk.

“Sounded like a pop.” Ashton said, taking in his surroundings. The bus came to a stop, the four boys following the driver out to the road.

“3 flat tires.” The driver sighed, scratching his beard. “We only got 1 spare.” The driver shook his head and boarded the bus once more.

“We’re in the actual middle of fucking nowhere.” Ashton said, turning around slowly to look down the road.

“Corn fields..” Luke mumbled, subconsciously holding Michael’s hand.

“Please tell me you’re not thinking what I think you’re thinking.” Michael groaned, pulling his hand from Luke’s.

“Aliens is a very reasonable thought to be having right now.” Luke huffed, crossing his arms.

“Aliens aren’t real.” Calum said, standing next to Ashton.

“What was that?” Luke asked, the four of them turning to face the rustling that came from the corn stalks.

“Not aliens.” Calum said, though he sounded unsure.

“I’m gonna clap alien cheeks.” Ashton said, picking up a stick from the side of the road. The four of them huddled together as they saw a bright light coming toward them out of the corn.

“Aliens!” Luke cried, gripping Ashton’s arm.

“It’s not aliens, it’s a person.” Michael said, watching as a woman exited the corn, two chocolate labs at her side.

“Are y’all okay?” She asked, Michael’s heart racing as she came into view, the flashlight illuminating her features.

“Yeah, we’ve got a few flat tires.” Ashton answered, pushing Luke’s hand off his arm.

“Yeah, we heard the pops from the ranch. It spooked the dogs.” The woman said, her hand scratching the ears of the dog to her left.

“We apologize deeply to them.” Calum said, looking at the two dogs.

“Uh, my dad’s coming with the truck if you guys want to come back to the ranch with us. It’ll be a while before anyone can get out to fix the tires.” She said as headlights came down the gravel road.

“That’d be very helpful.” The driver said, coming off the bus. “I wasn’t able to reach the other drivers.”

“We’ve got spotty service out here.” She nodded as the truck came to a stop. She opened the bed, the two dogs jumping up. She climbed up behind them and sat on the edge of the bed. “We can fit 2 of you in the cab, the rest will have to ride back here with me and the dogs.”

“Dogs!” Michael and Calum said at the same time. The two of them climbed into the bed of the truck, sitting in the middle of it. The dogs immediately crowded them, licking their faces.

“I’ll sit up front with our man Roger.” Ashton said, patting their driver on the shoulder. Luke climbed into the back as Ashton and the driver got in the front.

“What are their names?” Michael asked, scratching the ears of the chocolate lab with two different colored eyes.

“That ones Maggie, the other is Bubbles. I’m Y/N, by the way.” She smiled, watching Michael and Calum with the dogs.

“I’m Michael, this is Calum. That’s Luke, and Ashton’s up front.” Michael smiled as Maggie licked his face.

“I’ve heard of y’all. You’re that Australian band.” Y/N smiled and the truck pulled off down the gravel road. “I love y’all’s song Fly Away. It’s a favorite of mine.”

“That we are.” Luke smiled and looked ahead down the road. The sun had just barely finished setting into the horizon, setting the sky alight in colors of violet and deep red.

“We’re headed to Oklahoma City, though we might be a little late.” Michael sighed softly.

“You’re only about 4 hours away.” Y/N giggled softly and Michael’s heart skipped a beat. He couldn’t help the smile that found his lips. They made it back to the ranch and Y/N led them all inside, showing them where they could stay for the night. “Are y’all hungry? We were just about to sit for dinner when we heard your tires pop.”

“Food would be lovely.” Calum smiled, “though we don’t want to intrude.”

“Oh, it’s no issue at all. Come join us.” Y/N smiled and led them to the dining room where her mother had added 5 extra plates. Everyone sat and ate, Y/N’s father telling the whole history of the ranch and the town. Michael felt as if he was going to cry as he listened. His eyes found hers and she offered him a simple smile, but it made Michael feel something he had never felt before.

After dinner, the four boys made their way back to the guest room. “We haven’t cuddled like this in years.” Calum said as they all laid in the queen size bed.

“It’s because we’re giants now.” Luke said, attempting to get comfortable. “I hope the bus gets new tires soon.”

“I don’t.” Michael said, staring at the ceiling.

“What?” Ashton asked, the three of them looking at Michael.

“This town, this family, Y/N. It feels.. right. I knew this tour felt different, and this is the reason why.” Michael said, looking at his friends. “It sounds crazy, but I think the universe wanted us to get stuck here so I could meet Y/N. She’s everything I’ve imagined my dream girl to be.”

“You need some serious help.” Calum shook just head. “You met her 3 hours ago, you don’t know her.”

“I know, but I want too. No, I need to know her.” Michael sighed and continued staring at the ceiling. “I’m leaving her a ticket to the Oklahoma City show. If she comes, I know it’s meant to be. If she doesn’t, I’ll let her go..”

Michael barely slept. He couldn’t get her out of his head. When morning came, he was scared to get up. He knew he’d have to leave and he knew he’d never see her again. By the time they were up and dressed, the bus had new tires and they were ready to get back on the road. “Thanks for all of your help, Y/N.” Michael smiled down at her.

“It was no trouble at all.” She giggled softly and rubbed his arm gently. “Have a safe trip to Oklahoma City and have an amazing show.”

“I’ll have a ticket with your name on it, if you’d like to come.” He said, his hand finding hers.

“I-.” She was cut off by Ashton’s call you Michael.

“Hey, let’s get going!” Ashton said, looking over at Michael.

“I really hope to see you there.” Michael pressed a quick kiss to her cheek and ran off to join the boys on the bus. He sunk down on the couch as the bus began its journey once more. He put his earbuds in and played his music as he looked out the window. No matter what song was playing, he thought of her. He’d give anything to see her smile or hear her giggle one more time.

20 minutes to showtime and her ticket was still sitting in the box office. He left her a front row seat in his section, but the seat was empty when he walked out on stage. He wasn’t himself and everyone could tell, the fans and the boys. He walked up to his mic as his turn to talk came. “Oklahoma City how we feelin’?!” Michael yelled and the crowd roared. He wanted to feel the pride he felt at every other show when fans would scream for him, but he felt empty.

“Mike, I think they can do better than that.” Luke said, trying to hype the crowd and his best friend. The crowd roared louder, the feeling of pride still failing to make itself known to Michael. He looked out at the crowd before taking his guitar off and setting it on the stage.

“Oklahoma City, I’ve got a confession to make.” Mike started. “I met the most amazing person in the world yesterday.” A small smile tugged at his lips as the crowd went crazy. “I don’t believe in soulmates, at least I didn’t until I met her.” Michael’s eyes fell to the empty seat in front of him before scanning the crowd again. “She’s given my life new meaning, and she’s given my music new meaning.”

“Michael..” Calum said, pulling Michael’s attention to the right side of the stage where his eyes met those of a girl trying to make her way through the row to her seat. A grin found his lips as she stood in front of her seat, her eyes shining in the stage lights. Michael couldn’t hear her, but he knew she was giggling that giggle that sets his heart ablaze.

“This song isn’t on the set list, but.. Y/N, this ones for you.” He picked up his guitar as Ashton began the opening of Fly Away.

Tag List: @lukespumpkinspice @calumculture @kinglycalum @babylon-corgis @novacanecalum @spookymashton @dontdoitluke @isabella10028 @calumamongmen @bumblebet-20 @lockthisheartinchains @bitterbethany @sublimehood @myloverboyash @ironicallyirwin @lashtoncurls @mukesreject @sanfrancjsco @boytoynamedcalum @opinionatedpisces-official @blahehblah @lukehemmings @harry-hallows-eve @findingliam-o @gh0st-0f-y0u-95 @i-calumhood @maluminspace @autumnalclifford

[amberlylillian-blog]

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[tetrakys]

Trois Allumettes - Chapter 14

Rewrite of MCL UL episode 16 with Lysander.

Big thank you to the people who sent me their suggestions, let me know if you think I got it right.

FYI the song I mention at some point is Tsar B - Escalate

Chapters 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12-13

“She’s here!”

I looked up startled by the sudden commotion around me. I’d been walking slowly, my eyes on the ground, lost in my thoughts. I couldn’t stop picturing Nath covered in blood on the gym floor.

What had supposed to be one of the most pleasant evenings out of these holidays, had turned out to be one of the worst, spending hours at the hospital hoping for Nath conditions to be not as bad as they seemed.

I was finally back to campus and the whole little group with whom I’d gone to the carnival what felt like ages ago, was there, relieved looks on their faces as soon as they spotted me.

“I…” when I saw Lys my eyes got all misty, and the pressure suddenly subsided. I threw myself into his arms sobbing.

“Candy… I’m here…” he hugged me against his chest, and I got the feeling that the hold of his embrace calmed my heartbeat.

I cried in his arms for a minute, probably drenching his elegant coat with my tears. When I calmed down, he kissed me gently on the head.

They all wanted to know about Nath. I wasn’t looking forward to their questions, but apparently they already knew most of it from Amber. At least they knew that he’d been taken to the hospital after a beating. I filled them in with what I could. I had to stick to the mug story, I couldn’t tell them the truth, it wasn’t my place to.

“What a jerk!” we all turned around surprised to see Castiel fuming. “He supposedly wants to handle the situation on his own and then calls Candy? I doubt she’s the most appropriate person to call when you get mugged. What was the point? For her to see his condition without actually being able to help him? Imagine if the group of muggers had still been on the premises?! They would’ve gone after you too!”

“That’s enough, Castiel.” Lysander said in a firm tone, laying his arm around my shoulders. “We appreciate your concern, but this is not the right time. As you can clearly see Candy is upset enough.”

“Sorry,” Castiel nodded, “I shouldn’t have talked about it now, but it seemed important to make the point. We were all worried about you… My concern is what was talking.” He added, looking at Lysander earnestly.

We all said goodbye and Lys walked me to my dorm room.

“Are you ok?” he asked me as soon as we were alone in front of my door. Concern in his eyes, he sweetly stroked my cheek and I leaned into his touch.

“I didn’t know what to do, Lys… I felt so helpless.”

“You did the right thing, calling an ambulance. Despite his harsh tone and bad timing, I agree with Castiel. Nathaniel shouldn’t have put you in this situation, he should’ve called the emergency number from the start instead of putting you in unnecessary danger. I wish… I wished you’d asked me to go with you.” He added taking me in his arms.

“Lys… I didn’t think about it… I just ran.”

“I know. And this is one of the things I admire the most about you. You’re just so good and kind, you’d literally do anything for your friends. I just hope that one day you’re going to trust me enough to see me as the person to lean on when things get rough.”

“I trust you, Lys.” I hugged him tighter but didn’t add anything else, and he didn’t either. We both knew that we didn’t have nearly enough time together to become each other’s crutch.

“When I couldn’t find you I got so scared Candy. I pictured you alone, in that crowd and the worst scenarios ran through my mind.”

I kissed him apologetically, “I’m sorry for disappearing on you like that. And just when we’d finally managed to find some time to be together.”

“About that… I’m going to be busy tomorrow, and the day after I’m leaving for the farm where I’m going to spend the rest of the week.”

I felt my heart sink. We were on vacation, I was hoping to spend at least a bit of time with him and he was leaving.

“Would you… I mean…” I looked up at him, surprised by his stuttering and sudden embarrassment. “If you’ve nothing else to do… you could come with me.”

With him? To the farm? A whole week together?

I knew my answer already.

---

 “A whole week together starting with a road trip?” I said looking at Lys’ beautiful profile focused on the road ahead. “I feel quite lucky.”

“I would hardly call this a road trip,” he laughed, “it’s just a few hours stuck in a car with me, and I know I’m not the most talkative person. I’m afraid it’s going to be quite boring.”

Mph… he had no idea… how non-bored I was feeling at the moment. I’d always found men at the wheel quite sexy, but this particular man… the way he hold the wheel, his firm grip, his focused stare… he had a certain authoritative and slightly aggressive way of driving that seemed a little out of character for him and, at the same time, suited him a lot. It made me wonder if there where other aspects where he could act bossy and rough.

The simple thought made me blush.

To be honest, I hadn’t been able to think about much else these past 24 hours. Since knowing that I was going to spend the week at the place he’d grown up, I’d been ecstatic, I couldn’t wait to learn more about him and his past.

But when the thought of spending the night together had finally sunk in, I started to hyperventilate.

Not because I didn’t want to. I wanted to, oh… I really wanted to. I literally couldn’t wait. I’d even bought new underwear. A black and red corset with laces at the back but that could easily be removed thanks to convenient zip at the front, it also came with matching panties.

No, I wasn’t hesitant at all. I was fully prepared to take things to the next level.

What I wasn’t sure of, was if he wanted to.

The one time we’d come close to it, or at least were heading towards it, he’d backed off. He’d said he didn’t want to take advantage of me, knowing he was going to leave in a few months. The mere thought was absurd to me, no one was taking advantage of anyone here, I was very willing, more than willing. Also, we hadn’t been officially together at the time, so maybe his feelings had changed meanwhile.

Still, I was afraid of how he might react if we got close to it again, I wasn’t sure my self-esteem could take another rejection.

“Anyway, thanks for coming with me. Your presence alone is going to brighten what would’ve otherwise been a very tedious week.”

He explained that he didn’t have much heavy work to do, since the people he and Leigh had hired to work at the farm for this year where taking care of it. But he was supposed to meet with some clients, mostly local business owners, restaurants and such, who made use of their products.

This meant we were also going to have lots of free time to spend together. I literally couldn’t wait.

We spent the whole afternoon quietly listening to music on the radio, I made him laugh when I tried (and failed) to sing along. Let’s just say I’d never been gifted with a perfect pitch.

Sometimes he absentmindedly rested his hand on my knee, and my head went completely into overdrive. Particularly when his fingers lightly caressed my skin, sometimes rising a little up on my thigh.

I could tell that he wasn’t completely conscious of these gestures, because as soon as he realised what he was doing, he quickly removed his hand placing it back on the wheel. His grip so tight his knuckles became white.

We only stopped once to grab a quick bite, and when we arrived at the farm, it was already dark.

“I’m going to show you around tomorrow morning,” Lys said while we walked up a few steps to reach the front door. “It’s too late now and you need daylight to move around the property if you’re not used to it.”

He was right, I could tell the house was a big, old villa, but it was too dark to make up anything else. Inside though… as soon as he opened the door and turned on the light I was left speechless. It was old, yes, and rustic, definitely nothing I would’ve associated with Lysander, but it was also homely and comfy. We passed through a living room hosting a couple of soft-looking sofas that I was dying to throw myself on. A fireplace on the wall completed the picture of the perfect, dreamy, country house.

He showed me quickly the kitchen and the bathroom and stopped in front of a door.

“Here we are, this is your room.”

My… excuse me?!

“You’ll find clean sheets on the bed and extra pillows in the wardrobe if you need them. Goodnight.”

He leaned to leave a quick kiss on my cheek and disappeared in the room next door.

I remained there for a few seconds, petrified on the spot.

What had just happened?

Okay, I suspected he might still be worried about “taking advantage of me”, hurting my feelings, or whatever crazy idea he had created in his mind that stopped him from getting physical with me. But… even sleeping together, hugging each other, would have been amazing. I just wanted to feel closer to him. And now, with just a wall between us, he seemed so far away.

I pushed the door and stepped into my room. I didn’t even look around, I just headed directly to the bed like a zombie and sat on it.

He must’ve been tired for sure, having driven the whole day, still… it didn’t explain his odd behaviour.

Was it… me? Was he tired of me after spending the day together in close quarters? But it seemed he was having fun the whole time, I was positive about that. No, something else was going on.

I spent at least an hour sitting on that bed, trying to figure out what to do with no success. I might as well call it a night, it was very late, probably around 3am. It was best to try to get some sleep and talk to him the following day.

I removed my dress and remembered what I was wearing underneath. That corset had brought nothing but the worst of luck. I was now left in it and a long underskirt with a side cut that I made myself so that I could use it underneath a couple of dresses in that particular style.

I was about to start removing everything else so that I could slip into my nightwear, when I realised I was parched and it was probably a good idea to grab a glass of water from the kitchen before going to bed.

I just removed my shoes and headed towards the kitchen barefooted as to not make too much noise waking up Lys.

Trying to find my way to the kitchen in the dark wasn’t easy. I took the wrong turn a couple of times, when I finally found myself in the right room, I felt I was dying of thirst. Filling a glass from the tap, I took a huge sip and that’s when I heard the music.

Yes, there was music coming from somewhere. I couldn’t quite figure out what it was, but it sounded soft and almost sad.

Leaving the glass on the kitchen counter, I followed the sound, step after step bringing me closer to the source of the music, until I found myself in a room where something incredible was going on.

A huge grand piano was in the middle of the room, which was mostly dark, lighted by candles in different corners. Lysander was playing, following a music coming from a sound system. He looked so focused, so immersed in the music, I’d only ever seen him like this that one time he was reciting his poem at the open mic.

I had no idea he could play, and he definitely could. He’d rolled the sleeves of his white shirt up over his elbows and I stayed there, charmed. looking at the expert movements of his hands on the keys, listening to the amazing sounds he was creating. I could feel it reverberating in my chest, as if I was under a spell.

“Did I wake you up?”

Lys voice took me back to reality. The piano’s final note had just died but the song was still playing, probably on loop. It sounded so different without the piano, less melancholic and more sensual.

Or, at least, those were my feelings when I saw Lys raising his head to look at me, and I remembered that I was half undressed, only wearing my lingerie.

He took in my whole body, from head to toe. Starting from my flushed face and my long hair that I’d left loose around my shoulders, reaching mid-waist. He took in my corset and the way it squeezed my chest, creating a generous cleavage and a tiny waist. Then my hips, hugged my the underskirt, and the deep cut, that showed my thigh and leg, down to my bare feet.

He was speechless and couldn’t take his eyes off me.

“You didn’t,” I replied, “I was on my way back from the kitchen when I heard the music. I’m sorry if I interrupted your practice. I had no idea you could play the piano.”

I stepped into the room and walked towards him, stopping in front of him next to the piano.

I pressed on a key out of curiosity, the sound reverberating into the room. “You’re incredibly good.”

He smiled sadly. “Thank you, but I’m far from it. My mother was the pianist of the family, I’m but a mere amateur. I play from time to time to calm myself, when I’m too pensive or restless.”

“And what are you now? Pensive or restless?”

“Both.” He replied earnestly, resting his hands on my hips. “I feel restless because I can’t stop thinking about you and at how much I want you.”

My heart skipped a beat at his words.

“I feel the same. I want you and I can’t sleep thinking about how you pushed me away the moment we stepped into this house.”

He didn’t try to deny it, he knew exactly what I was talking about. I was standing in front of him while he was still sitting on the bench, from my higher vantage point I felt I could act bolder, so I laid my hand in his hair, caressing the soft tendrils between my fingers.

He closed his eyes, lost in the sensations of my caresses. “I was trying to do the right thing, but I don’t think I can anymore.”

“Good.” I simply replied. “If being together is wrong, then I’m ready to make the biggest mistake of my life. Over and over again.”

His hands tightened their hold on my hips and when he opened his eyes again I could read so much longing and lust that I knew he was done pretending now.

Before I could realise what he was doing, he pushed me against the piano and made me seat on the keyboard. The cacophony of sounds completely ignored as he attacked my mouth with his. One hand grabbed my chin, as his lips took possess of mine, repeatedly. His other hand grabbed my thigh through the slit and moved it so that I could hook my legs around his waist.

Without interrupting our kiss, he lifted me and, walking around the instrument with complete ease, as if I weighted nothing, he dropped me on the closed lid.

Only then we finally came up for air. I knew I must be flushed and completely dishevelled, but he looked at me as if I was the most fascinating piece of art he’d ever laid eyes on.

“You’re so beautiful.” He said almost pained. “I never knew what desire was until the day I met you. I thought I did, but it turns out I was just an ignorant fool. You haunt my thoughts and dreams Candy, day or night, I’m inevitably, completely yours.”

I wasn’t as good with words as him, so I simply took his hand and put it on my chest, right above my heart. “So am I. Yours.”

This seemed to be enough for him to put aside any final reservation and doubt. The hand on my chest got bolder and he grabbed my breast above the fabric of my corset. When he realised the garment was nothing but an hindrance to his explorations, he grabbed the zip and slowly opened it, savouring the exquisite torture of anticipation.

At the same time his other hand went beck to my thigh, caressing higher and higher.

The moment my chest was completely exposed to his eyes, he looked spellbound and lowered his lips to my soft skin. His hand now had finally reached the spot it was looking for, and the combined sensations of his lips and his fingers above the fabric of my underwear, was enough to make me lose my mind.

But before I could even start to let go, he left my body and I almost cried at the loss. Grabbing both skirt and slip, he pushed them down my legs, so that now I was completely naked in front of him.

He looked so handsome and impressive as he took in my now completely naked body, that I almost felt like a sacrificial offering to a god, and I was ready lo let him do whatever he wanted to me.

He slowly, without breaking his eyes away from any part of my body he felt like looking at, removed his shirt, so that now I had a perfect view of his chiselled chest that I was dying to feel under my fingers. But he didn’t give me the chance to raise to touch him.

Grabbing my knees, he opened me to his stare, and I saw his eyes turn incredibly dark and lose any trace of self-control.

His mouth was on me before I could even say a word, not that I wanted to. Pushing me down, he made me lie with my back on the piano, and helped me slide so that now my bottom was at the edge. His hands on my breasts, grabbing with a rough strength that was almost deliciously painful, and his tongue on my bundle of nerves, tasting me hungrily.

When one of his hands rose up to my face and his index finger rested on my lips, I knew exactly what he wanted me to do, so I looked at him in the eye as I took it in my mouth and sucked, wetting it with my saliva.

A few seconds later I felt that finger entering me.

I dropped my head on the piano and lost myself in the sensation. He was playing my body with the same focus and passion as he’d done with the piano, and I hoped that the sounds I was making were as pleasing to his ears as his music had been to mine. I was panting, moaning, and crying his name over and over again and, when I felt I was just about to fall off the edge of pleasure, he stopped and stepped back.

I groaned in frustration. I’d been so damn close.

But before I could find the strength to protest or beg, I felt something much bigger than a finger entering me and he took my breath away.

Yes!

We were finally one, and I could feel him everywhere, inside of me and over me.

If I thought making love with him was going to be sweet and tender, I was wrong. Completely wrong. He was rough, and strong, and he took me as if he wanted to possess me completely, body and soul. There was still something loving in the way he delicately moved a tendril of hair from my face and caressed my lips, as if he wanted to kiss me, but the position made it impossible. So he kept pistoning inside me like a man possessed. The moment his thumb came to my clit I came while crying his name.

And as I came down from my high, and my eyes found his again, he followed me, moaning something that I wasn’t able to understand. The force of his orgasm so strong that he crushed over me, his head resting on my chest. My hands came immediately to his hair, caressing his locks as we both found our breaths again.

“You’re perfect,” he whispered.

“I believe you are the perfect one here. Seriously, poetry, music and… this… is there anything you cannot do?”

I felt him lightly laugh against my skin.

“I’m not sure, I guess we have to practice thoroughly and make several tests to find out.”

“Well, I guess there’s no other choice then,” I replied faking a resigned tone. “I guess I shall help you out.”

“Please,” he laughed. “I have so many ideas on my mind, this week won’t be enough to test them all.”

His lips found mine, and we kissed again.

Again and again, all the way through the night.

---

Back to Chapter 13

[ctpfinal2018]

Lingue Senza Frontiere - A Guide

 When I first auditioned to work with this company, there was little information on the roles and responsibilities, or even what to expect and bring. So, I have decided to make a post based off of my experience to help guide those who are considering working for this company.

 For those who have no idea what I’m talking about, Lingue Senza Frontiere (or LSF as I will call them from now on) are an Italian Educational Theatre Company that gets groups of actors to tour the north of Italy. The actors perform a variety of plays to a variety of schools as well as running workshops after shows. They also run summer camps. If you want to check them out, I’ll link their website but it is in Italian so you might wanna get google translate on it:- https://www.linguesenzafrontiere.com/

Tip 1:- Check your journey price and time frame  LSF offer 100 euros for your first travel over to Italy. They will not pay you for any other trips in and out of the country you may make during your contract with them. So look at how much it’s going to cost you to get from where you live to the Sanremo station in Italy, as that is where the company picks you up to take you to the accommodation. The nearest airport is Nice and there’s normally buses and trains that can take you from there. But also be aware of how long the journey will take. There may not be a direct flight from your local airport to the Nice airport, or your arrival time may not work out for getting a train to Sanremo. The company will want you to be at Sanremo station by 6pm European Time at the latest, since they close their office at 6pm and might not offer to collect you should you need to arrive later than that. But also think about your own health in the journey. You don’t want to be taking two planes, a train and a bus all in one day just so you don’t have to pay to sleep overnight somewhere. Consider what’s going to be the best route, work out the cost including luggage and if it comes to over 100 euros see if you can speak with LSF about covering the extra charges so you can meet their required arrival time.

Tip 2:- Don’t over pack  So you’re going to another country for possibly 8 months without returning home. You’re not sure what weather you could be facing, so you should probably bring a lot of stuff, right? Wrong. You’re only staying in Sanremo during your rehearsal period so when you go off to act you need to fit your suitcase, as well as the suitcases of the other actors and all of the props and costumes for the shows into a Peugeot car, maybe a small Peugeot van at best. You won’t have time to wear your beautiful summer clothes or fashionable winter jeans. Pack black trousers, leggings and jeans. You have to wear black for the shows, so make sure you have a few pairs in case any get damaged during performances. It does get cold at winter and we all heard how hot Europe was this summer so yeah make sure you have a variety, just a variety of black, with a few bits for weekends and potential evening meals out. Maybe pack one of them thingies for checking the weight of your case for your journey back. There are launderettes at both flats, both of which don’t require washing powder. And as someone who uses non-bio washing powder, I never had an issue with itchy clothes.

Tip 3:- Take a rucksack and a microwaveable food box  Speaking of keeping things light, take a rucksack. After you move from Sanremo, you settle in a flat in Capriate San Gervasio where you’ll spend most of your weekends. You can leave your suitcase there. Most of your accommodation during the week will be in hotels, flats and airbnb’s. Not all of them will have lifts. Not all of them will have cooking facilities. Trust me, you don’t want to be lugging an entire suitcase into a hotel you are staying in for one night. Take a rucksack with a weeks worth of essential clothes and toiletries. Make yourself some pasta for lunch and store it for the car journey.

Tip 4:- Bring an Italian adaptor  Yeah, that title’s right. Not a European adaptor, an Italian adaptor. One with three, thin prongs rather than the two fat ones European adaptors have. Both company accommodations only use Italian adaptors and most flats also use the same plug system. Here’s one for reference:- https://www.amazon.co.uk/ADAPTOO-ADV-12-ADAPTOR-UK-ITALY/dp/B002YKNTUM/ref=asc_df_B002YKNTUM/?tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=311075391090&hvpos=1o8&hvnetw=g&hvrand=13891911048839537870&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1006679&hvtargid=pla-562449714173&psc=1

Tip 5:- Learn some basic Italian  LSF will tell you that you don’t need to know Italian to do your job. They’re lying. Not only does most of the accommodation not understand basic English (which, let’s face it some little town that never gets tourists aren’t going to bother learning a language they’ll never use in day-to-day life) but sometimes the teachers who had requested the performance didn’t understand English. Part of the job is calling accommodation to confirm the time you will arrive, and calling the teachers to confirm what they’ve paid for. So here’s a bit of Italian that will save your skin:- Ciao, siamo LSF. Abbiamo una prenotazione/ un spettacolo con te domani. Posso parlare Inglese? This means:- Hello, we are LSF. We have a reservation/ a show with you tomorrow. Can I speak English? A good way to learn is through Duolingo, though you’re bound to pick up things the longer you’re in the country and practising the language.

Tip 6:- Learn the scripts and songs before you arrive  You have two weeks to block out and rehearse like, 5 plays as well as learn how to run the workshops and practice driving. You don’t want to shove learning lines and songs on top of that too. Though be prepared for the company to add in audience interaction into the script.

Tip 7:- Make sure to read the contract in detail before signing  The company will try to guilt you into doing more for the company, such as working over the weekend to learn new workshop styles. They will state that it is in the contract for you to do these things. Whilst this is kind of true, sometimes the company will try to spring things on you last minute such as last minute bookings. Make sure to communicate your concerns with the company about any issues that may rise with their expectations from you in the role.

Tip 8:- Have a phone plan that provides lots of data  The company provides a WiFi router for the Capriate flat, but it only has 30G of data per month for the 10 people who are living in the flat. That’s 3G of data per month per person. Plus the SatNav the company provides tends to take you down narrow roads and dead ends so it is always good to make sure you can use your own google maps to look for a safer route. 

Tip 9:- Look after the company car and your locations  The company will provide you with a car to get from place to place, as well as funds for petrol and emergency funds for washing costumes, cleaning facilities for flats etc. The company base your potential bonus at the end of the contract on the maintenance of the car and the flats. If you receive a speeding ticket, it is taken off of your bonus. Even if you weren’t the one driving, as the company states that everyone in the group is responsible for the car regardless of if they drive or not. If you do damage the car, make sure to contact the company immediately to ask them what to do. Little scratches and bumps are inevitable but communication is key when making sure you are covered for any damage caused. The same with the flats. If you do not recycle your waste correctly, the flat could be fined. If the flat is unclean or the toilets and drains become blocked, the company may need to pay for these fixing and thus your bonus deducting for said fixes.

Tip 10:- Make the most of your free time  Be aware of how long it will take you to journey from one accommodation to the next. Ask the accommodation owners when the earliest and latest times are to arrive. Look at how many shows you will be performing and take time to enjoy your surroundings. If you are performing near to Verona and you have 3 hours free before you need to leave, take some time to go and sight-see. Italy is a beautiful country and there’s lots to experience. So enjoy the time you have out there. Treat yourself to a Michelin star restaurant. Stuff your face at an all-you-can-eat Chinese. Experience the towns people pay hundreds of pounds to visit for a weekend and you get to see simply by performing to a school nearby. Visit the neighbour at the Capriate flat and learn to play a card game in Italian.

 In conclusion, working for LSF was an experience I was proud to obtain. Sure, sometimes the other actors drove me a little crazy. But that is inevitable when you’re basically spending 24/7 with the same people. Sharing rooms and sometimes even beds wasn’t exactly what I expected but it wasn’t too bad. Most stuff you learn as you go, growing stronger with each new challenge the role brings your way. You’ll learn how to be smart with both the company’s money and your own money. You’ll learn when and where the best place to wash and dry your clothes is. You’ll learn to balance your work relationship with your friendships with your fellow actors, and when sometimes you just need a few minutes to yourself. You’ll learn to balance the company’s duties amongst the group and work together to bring joy to the children you perform to.

 If you have any more questions about what to expect, don’t be afraid to ask the company, or even ask me.

[caatws]

tagged by @justanalto to answer some questions !! :)

1. What is the color of your hairbrush? it’s like a blueish/greenish color and has moana on it! i usually comb my hair so i bought that brush just bc it was moana themed a few years ago lol. i don’t use it often

2. Name a food you never eat. there are many.....#justchildhoodocdthings ermmmm i don’t eat a lot of snack foods like chips or goldfish

3. Are you typically too cold or too warm? too warm, esp these days bc the weather is hella warming up so i wake up feeling hot a lot

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? i was working on some post-grad work stuff and then crossed over into my roommates’ room to watch the facebook livestream graduation 2020 thing cuz miley was on singing the climb

5. What is your favorite candy bar? i love a good hershey’s special dark chocolate moment

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports event? yes, quite a lot actually! my mom is super into sports, so i grew up going to a handful of pro sports games - mlb, nba, and nhl. never nfl tho bc my mom said the price of tix wasn’t worth it LMAOOOO. also when the olympics are here in la in like 8 years i wouldn’t mind checking out some events here !!

7. What is the last thing you said out loud? i asked my roommate if she wanted me to close the door as i was leaving her room bc she was abt to hop on a zoom call

8. What is your favorite ice cream? chocolate.....esp if it’s dark chocolate which is Rare

9. What was the last thing you had to drink? starbucks peppermint hot chocolate bc i’m a basic bitch!!!!

10. Do you like your wallet? yeah, i only upgraded from my middle school wallet like back in 2018 to a normal adult looking one. it’s purple and has enough pockets for all my shit! still bulky tho

11. What was the last thing you ate? ....nothing LMFAOOOO lunch is usually my first meal of the day and i haven’t had it yet. but last night i had ramen for dinner

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? last time i bought clothes was i ordered one of the black widow hoodies from hot topic like a month ago....other than that i have not gone clothes shopping since pre-quarantine

13. The last sporting event you watched? i don’t even know....i didn’t watch the super bowl, so it’d either be some time my roommate was watching hockey on our tv or whatever sports my mom was watching when i was still home for winter break in january

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? KETTLE CORN!!!!

15. Who is last person you sent a text message to? i sent a pic of miley singing the climb on the fb livestream on my friend’s laptop to my fam being like “lol miley is our commencement performer!!!!” and my mom was just like cool

16. Ever go camping? yes unfortunately....never for more than a night at a time tho bc i literally Cannot

17. Do you take vitamins? no bc what is Health

18. Do you go to church every Sunday? used to back in the days of catholic school (pre college), but now no longer

19. Do you have a tan? nah bc we can’t go outside bro

20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza? chinese food 100% i personally think pizza is overrated

21. Do you drink soda with a straw? i don’t believe i ever do tbh

22. What color socks do you usually wear? i only own socks with colorful patterns/designs on them which is extra but very me i suppose

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? always! (a reasonable amount over tho, like within 5-10 mph over...this is average for californians, while many others speed hella)

24. What terrifies you? not a fan of heights nor uncertainty, and this pandemic has essentially destroyed my post grad hopes/plans and now i enter an uncertain future

25. Look to your left, what do you see? my bed, with a lot of stuff piled on top

26. What chore do you hate? all of them???? i guess doing the dishes mostly tho bc i hate the smell of wet dishes with food waste/residue on them and it just feels so gross i can’t

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? i think wow australia sounds like a wild country

28. What’s your favorite soda? orange soda 4ever

29. Do you go into a fast food place or just hit the drive-thru? drive-thru if i can !!! but i don’t mind going in if there’s ample parking available

30. Who’s the last person you talked to? my roommate, when i asked if she wanted me to close the door LMAO

31. Favorite cut of beef? all of them????? i’m not picky with meat dsflkbn

32. Last song you listened to? as i was driving back into my garage the radio station i was listening to started playing sugar we’re going down which threw me for a time loop

33. Last book you read? i’ve been reading fanfic mostly recently so ig whatever the last thing i read for my internship weeks ago was, it would be that

34. Favorite day of the week? even tho time doesn’t matter in quarantine, i’ll always be a friday stan

35. Can you say the alphabet backwards? i used to be decent at it but i’m out of practice now. i’ll try to just type it rly quickly and see: zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba (ok so this took me like 5ish secs to type so that’s p good!)

36. How do you like your coffee? i don’t! i just drink peppermint hot chocolate :^)

37. Favorite pair of shoes? my doc martens, but they are now out of season for most of the rest of the year bc i live in southern california where it’s Hawt so i probs won’t wear them again til december

38. The time you normally go to sleep? sometime between 1 and 3 am

39. The time you normally get up? sometime between 9 and 11 am

40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? sunsets are dope!!!

41. How many blankets on your bed? three, including my sheet, comforter, and a small quilt

42. Describe your kitchen plates. some are just round and plain white, some are round and white with a red decorative border, one is a pokémon plate meant for children that i bought cheap at target

43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage? piña colada!!! but if i’m trying to get drunk i need vodka or somethin

44. Do you play cards? not much tbh! my apartment has been on a mahjong streak as of late

45. What color is your car? silver!!

46. Can you change a tire? no i’m useless but also my parents believe i’ll get murdered if stuck on the side of the road (which is possible) so they’d prefer me to call aaa for help

47. Your favorite province? uhhhhhhh no provinces here in the u.s. but canada has provinces and i went to british columbia (to visit vancouver) once as a kid so???? if we talking states tho y’all know i will die for california

48. Favorite job you’ve ever had? honestly my job at my school’s mail center this past year was rly cool! my boss was so great and the other student workers were chill, so it was a nice environment and i enjoyed learning all these mail-related skills

49. How did you get your biggest scar? i have no scars ;))))

50. What did you do today that made someone else happy? i had my final appointment with my therapist from my school since i graduated, so i thanked him for working with me the past year and a half!

i tag: anyone who wants to do this, i’m lazyyyyy hehe so feel free to steal!!!! i wanna read y’all’s answers

[sirfleurs]

i was sixteen years old when my hand was blue.

The grayscale pitch

Preface      

Life is not easy when you are high and alone watching television or pulling an all-nighter listening to Jimi Hendrix. The brain becomes dull. Overstimulated by genius. You stop thinking and overthink at the same time. I guess that’s what some people call daydreaming. All your bad thoughts get loose and all your inhibitions disappear. I figure this is right before the moment you are most likely to kill yourself. I’ll give it an hour before my Manic-Depression shows its ugly face. As I haven’t killed myself yet in an age of 23 I think I’ve done pretty well. I was sitting in my room in some Woodstock apartment writing on my first ever soon to be book. I had decided to call it ‘The Pitch’. It would be about some witty guy who had a great idea and he would be trying to sell his ‘pitch’ to everyone who’d listen. I had thought the rest of the story through. To be honest I didn’t know more than that. As I was about to sit down I had a beer, smoked a cig and 5 minutes beforehand I had masturbated to a busty forest nymph. Believe me was I tired.

A week ago I was checked-in at Fitzroy Hostel in New York City. It had been insane. My supposedly friends and I were drinking cheap wine in our room during this pandemic across the country. Geez after two bottles of wine I somehow managed to pay for- and eat two caps of MDMA and it blew my mind. I sat on the floor to cool my ass but everything began to spin and it hit me hard like a jolt. Andrew said “hey dude, maybe you should go to the bathroom and stick two fingers in your throat you don’t look too good”. But he was just too late. I burst like a water balloon, vomiting on the floor of Duncans room. Duncan was this nice guy that played XBOX and drank occasionally. Geez was I sorry. I locked myself in the bathroom to get the caps out. I was trying to vomit and I began to feel heated. The MDMA had already kicked in and it was too late to reverse it. I would have to wait this one out. Everything started to feel nice all around the body. My eyes became big as small plates and my teeth began to clench. I got an strange urge to stick my hand in the toilet to cool my body. Something I am not very proud of. On the small shelf I found a shampoo that I emptied in the toilet too just for the hell of it. Minutes later people would lock the door up with a coin and find me covered in shampoo. The helped me in the shower and I went to bed shortly after. Hours later I woke up. Two guys invited me for a joint. Something I couldn’t decline. It was only the second time I had ever tried drugs. While we smoked this cat, Alex told me “you know this only happened because you drank too much. You can never be too careful with mixing alcohol and MD. It doesn’t help that you hadn’t eaten anything either.” “Geez, I was not in control at all. I’d better stick to weed and drinking. That’s something I know”. Always do drugs with very good pals of yours.

So I went to the street and couldn’t make any money. I was to make something one way or the other. Which isn’t always easy when you don’t know what profession you want to be in. All I knew was that I didn’t need any tiresome busy work in my life. I like to feel needed but not so much that I can’t laugh and have breaks during the day. Life is life you know. But I would dance down the street like drums banging through the air. Long time ago I would have taken every job offered to me now I’m not so sure. I went to a fruit parlor in the New Habor Market in near Manhatten in princess St. I asked the first guy :” how much are these avocados.” “two fifty for three piece”. Fruit in the markets are much cheaper than everywhere else and the life is strong on the street which I thought couldn’t be bad. Everyone just running back and forth doing their bussinnes as usual. The markets was one of the places that hadn’t closed due to the pandemic. Nice, I thought to myself. I handed the guy three dollars and told him to keep the rest. “ hey man, how you get a job here standing here selling fruit, I’d really like to know”. “ah young man, I could take a look at your resume if you’d like”. Problem was I didn’t have much to offer him, so I stalled him trying to promote myself in person. I can be a very persuasive guy sometimes. When I’m in the right mood and I felt it crippling in my fingers my mood was good for this situation. “Hey man, I don’t exactly have a written resume. But I’ll tell you everything you’ll need to know. Im good at shouting and a quick learner give me a shot and ill prove to you, you didn’t waste your time”. I sounded like a sucker. But I couldn’t eat my words. The guy didn’t seem interested. I said “I promise give me a shot and I will not blow it.” He looked me in the eye and we stood for a few seconds staring at each other. “come down tomorrow at 6 sharp I’ll see what you can do. You won’t be paid for your three first shifts and from thereon you’ll be paid commission on how much you sell”. Sounded good to me so I nodded “you betcha” I said with a coy smile I sounded like a dork geez. Anyhow that’s how I got my first job. It went fairly well. I continued down the street. I still had something else to do before my first shift. Let me stand next to your fire I thought to myself. I was excited as hell. Down the road I saw a green balloon it was helium filled balloons. A clown was giving them out to kids. Everything was nice the weather was good and you could hear the wind sweep from central park. I needed to buy some weed for the next time coming. So I got up my phone and rang my friend Alex who had a connection. “O boyy I got a job fix me up with some of that green”. I met him outside the hostel and bought a quarter ounce for 50 dollars which is a fine price for nugs like these. Then I went home and lit a blunt. Just a small one while I sat at my outside porch. We had a giant tree and a lot of ungroomed weeds in our garden. We also had a cat I personally named Pysser in the name of my favourite old person who recently died. He was a sergent Knud Romer was his name. He once wrote an article about me when I was fifteen going to summer camp for young boys with no other places to go for their vacation. God was I sad to see him go. When I was done with the blunt I went up to my room and opened my book. It was called Pimp and the author went by the moniker Iceberg Slim. What kind of badass shit was that. It was kind of interesting the way he proclaimed the pimp life. And he was a real gangster. His bottom whore at the end of her mileage. Meaning the whore who kept every other whore in his house in line. When she goes everything always goes to hell for a pimp. He conend her. He made a whole setup with actors to con her into thinking she killed a rich motherfucker. She would be in the hotel room and this guy would collapse on her. Slim would come up to the room and call a doctor and get the guy collected. Slim conned her into thinking he bribed the police. That way his bottom whore was good to go for more tricks. That’s some cold shit. My thought whirled reading about the cocaine snorting and his nose hurting feelings of something scraping at the roof of his brain made me dizzy. I closed the book and stared at the ceiling. Dreaming. Aw man what do I do now. My head bounced like a bass line I felt slick. Breathing heavily but still relaxed. I went down for a cig to clear my thoughts. Sitting there I couldn’t stop looking at all the animals we had in this household. Cat and two dogs just lying freely whenever wherever.

The next morning I came back 6 sharp. A long 10 hours shift. My legs were aching and my head spiining. I wasn’t used to long as shifts. I was only used to lying around doing nothing chilling with friends. But it would come to me In time oso I ekpt coming there shouting like the others. Loud and confident keeping my back steady trying to pull in costumers in. At the end of each shift you would get paid a percentage of what you’ve sold. The first day I sold I couple of vegetables to this old lady who though I was cute and some couples wanting watermelon smoothies. It didn’t go so well. And I sure as hell didn’t want those pity purchases from old ladies. I made two fifty. It really wasn’t much. But at least I was paid the first day. Something I wasn’t expecting. I went to home sat on the couch with the other living there. We sat there chilling drinking beer and playing chess. And some girl that was visiting was playing skyrim.

Dreamers day

I remember when I was a small kid. I would look at the ocean and dream of being a bird. I would be on the moon. I was a gay kid, really. So much that my mother and sister thought I was actually gay. I remember the beach of Turkey. The warm ocean on my limbs under the moonlight. The salt burning in your eyes. Those were the days of happiness and good rest. Father would show us to surf the water on our stomachs whenever a wave came. Also the days of Levanto were nice. Father and I would hike the mountains at daybreak. We would struggle to find a parking spot and Father would cuss. Sister and I would get mojitos and look at the natives. The parties were everywhere. We would bathe in the clear water by the cliff. I remember many young adults would jump in. Everyone wearing speedos except one skinny langy kid. A couple kissing. The guy would get a boner and the girl would cover his little man with her belly. They kissed passionately. People would jump in from 5 meters and even more. Chances were one day they wouldn’t jump far enough into the water and they would hit the sharp rocks at the cliffs bottom. I picked small black clams from the rock and lurked it open. Levanto was a trip through forests cussing. We were in Italy. Driving a big bad car. I would lie across the extra three seats in the behind. I would push my bare feet against the cold glass of the window. I would see the damp print of my feet and the water drops on the other side of the window. I was glad I was inside the warmth of the car. My sisters friend was along. I liked her. She must have been sisters best friend. Not anymore.. I would lie in the bed reading. I was afraid of small gold fish. We would see the colosseum. I would ask “is it real”. Father would laugh for 10 years. I am now here in bed. On the other side of the world. Mother was different. We would be inside. I would care about her. She would be weaker. Depressed. I would be worried sick. I am still worried. But I am also smarter. She can care for herself. She stopped smoking now for the seventeenth time. She says one day she will make it. I hope it for her sake. I am not sure. The price of cigarettes went up. I would watch television. I would come out and talk to her she would listen and I would cry. This pretty much sums up our relationship. I still love her though. I was a dreamer. My English teacher told my sister I lived on the moon. That was fine with me. Not anymore. I want to be in this world now. I want to do good.

The days when we were friends we would go around your backyard make silly films. Scream like small girls. But we were small boys. Guess there is not that big of a difference. We would draw silly faces in class. We would play on the smartboard. We didn’t care about anything but fun. We would be older and try to learn music. Try to do good in school. People break apart and new people find each other. Right now I don’t find anyone. I am alone with the people I live with. The are polite and we drink together. But we are not friends. Not yet but we could be., I think things can happen. “Don’t think twice it’s alright”. You can get everything down the first time you try. You see poetry and stories are written in the haze in the bottom of your mind. You have to write it now not think too much. Know what you want to write and hurry up. Times against you. You have to run or it will be dull or you will be drowsy. Don’t let anything walk up behind your back. Keep your ears and eyes open for everything. This is not the time for storytelling. Open your eyes open your ears. You didn’t see the best minds of your generation starving hysterical naked.

Three small kittens

The day came after the weekend to go back to work at the fruit parlor., The guy seemed to be very contend with my abilities. I would make at least ten dollars for my self each shift. And I would have just enough for food for the day. Not that it was enough. I still had rent to cover. So I seeked my boss for help asking “how do you make a living out of this. Whats the catch.” He responded “the catch is catch 22 anyone who wants to get out of combat duty isn’t really crazy”. “would you have to be crazy to want to be in combat?” he nodded “and it works the other way around too”. I pondered it over “you would have to be rationel to want to come out of combat?” “exactly”. It didn’t make any sense to me. What did that have to do with anything. After the shift my chef handed my a fairly small red book with the title Catch-22. I had only made eight dollars this day. It felt lousy. At least I was able to take as much leftover I wanted. That would cover my hunger, but the money wouldn’t cover my rent. Soon I would run out of money and I had no idea as to what to do. I came home and fell down the stinking madras on the floor of my room. I opened the first page of the book he had handed to me. Whatever it was about I was kind of excited to dick in. Every two hours I would go down for a cig and occasionally a glass of water. Didn’t eat anything except avocados. They sustain you for a long time and are delicious with salt. Just be careful some of the avocados are bad inside and will give you diarrhea. It isn’t very comfortable to go to the bathroom every ten minutes during a shift with your boss around. Next I had collected 330 dollars earning eleven dollars for myself. Which is a personal record of mine. I knew I could do better. Catch 22 was a real witty book I didn’t know what I had to learn from it. Each day I would come back to work my boss wouldn’t mention the book. He would just keep yelling for ten 12 hours straight like a muezzin standing on the top of the tower calling to prayer. He was insane. During the day his temple would pulsate like an angry cat who had catched syphilis. Sometimes his lips would be blue and he would have to sit down. Whenever that occurred shortly after he would pull up a small orange container from his pocket and down some pills. He must have had a heart disease or something. I wouldn’t get involved though. He never brought it up himself. So I figured he must have had a good reason to keep low profile. It wasn’t my fight to fight. Four times a day I would go further away with some of the other youngsters trying to make it as a fruit parlor. I was doing the worst but who really cares. It was no competition. I was just trying to make a living.