#and henry's sons were all still in their teens (late teens - but still teens) which might have made their succession seem more fragile

[une-sanz-pluis]

Hi, what exactly did the royal charter excluding the Beaufort family from the throne say?

Hi! So in February 1407, John Beaufort, Earl of Somerset requested that the act legitimatising him and his siblings be confirmed by Letters Patent, which he duly received. At the same time, the royal charter that legitimised the Beauforts was modified by the insertion of the words excepta dignitate regali ("except to royal dignity"). I believe the royal charter is in the Parliament Rolls of Medieval England which I don't have access to but a 19th century historian published a transcription:

Be it remembered, that on Tuesday the fifteenth day of Parliament, the Chancellor, by the King's command, declared how our Holy Father the Pope had, in reverence of the most excellent person of the King, and of his honorable uncle the Duke of Guyenne and of Lancaster, and of his blood, enabled and legitimatized Sir John de Beauford, his brothers and his sister, and that therefore our Lord the King as entire Sovereign of his Realm of England, for the honour of his blood, wills, and hath of his full royal power enabled and of his own proper authority made the said John, his said brothers and sister, muliers, and also pronounced and published the ability and legitimatization according to the form of the King's charter thereof made. The which charter was read in full Parliament and delivered to the said Duke, father of the said John, and his said brothers and sister, the tenor of which charter ensueth. Richard by the grace of God, King of England and France, and Lord of Ireland, to our most dear cousins the noble men, John the Knight, Henry the Clerk, Thomas 'Domicello,' and to our beloved the noble woman Joan Beaufond 'Domicelle,' the most dear relatives of our uncle the noble John Duke of Lancaster, born our lieges, greeting, and the favour of our royal majesty. Whilst internally considering how incessantly and with what honours we are graced by the very useful and sincere affection of our aforesaid uncle, and by the wisdom of his counsel, we think it proper and fit that, for the sake of his merits, and in contemplation of his favors, we should enrich you (who are endowed by nature with great probity and honesty of life and behaviour, and are begotten of royal blood, and by the divine gift are adorned with many virtues,) with the strength of our royal prerogative of favour and grace. Hence it is, that, yielding to the entreaties of our said uncle your father, we do, in the fullness of our royal power and by the assent of Parliament, by the tenor of these presents empower you, who as it is asserted suffer from the want of birthright, (notwithstanding such defect, which, and the qualities thereof, we take to be in these presents sufficiently expressed) to be raised, promoted, elected, assume, and be admitted to all honours, dignities, [except to the royal dignity] pre-eminencies, estates, degrees and offices public and private whatsoever, as well perpetual as temporal, and feodal and noble, by whatsoever names they may be designated, whether they be Duchies, Principalities, Earldoms, Baronies or other fees, and whether they depend or are holden of us mediately or immediately, and to receive, retain, bear, and exercise the same as freely and lawfully as if ye were born in lawful matrimony, and you and every of you do restore and legitimatize : any statutes or customs of our realm of England to the contraiy thereof made or observed (which we consider to be herein fully expressed) in anywise notwithstanding. (Source: Samuel Bentley, Excerpta Historica, Or Illustrations of English History (1831))

Wars of the Roses historians generally credit this addition to Henry IV, historians of Henry IV to Thomas Arundel, Archbishop of Canterbury who was no Beaufort fan and in a powerful position during this time due to Henry IV's illness.

[liquid-geodes]

Alright fuckers. Here is some analysis from someone who has hated the guy since I found out what he's done. Yes I'm talkin about Peepaw Willy here.

So with the pages Link, the person I'm submitting this to, posted there are some things to consider. Canon FNAF is actually really vague on some things. The murders are a prime example, it was hella obvious that William is the one who killed them, but not the one who put them in the suits. The Marionette is the one who was shown to put the children in there as a "gift." Then you find out later that Charlie Emily was murdered first and put inside that suit. So it's not an exaggeration to say that she made that choice for them but again, not really confirmed.

But Kole, I hear you asking, what does this have to do with William's choice to murder. Well you see, I don't think it was what he was aiming for at first. Let's take a look at his work schedule, fucker worked relentlessly, that is a canon thing. Worked late nights, since he was a founder of Freddy's, Baby's, and a robotics company, it's safe to say he was a very tired man. When you are that tired, you are more easily suggested into things. And since he was working at an already haunted attraction. Anything could happen during the late nights and early mornings.

You wanna say that's a stretch? Fine. How about after the first murder, Charlie. It was no secret that again, in canon, Henry and William were buddies. So killing someone who in the very least, you've known their whole life, doesn't do great things to your already tired mind. So whatever got him to kill the first time could easily use the distress to make him kill again. And again...And again-

Which brings my next point. He didn't kill Michael. I want you to really hear me when I say this. He chose not to kill his son. He could have easily done so when he left. If William truly was unaffected but all of this and did not care about anyone but himself, he would have killed Michael. No problems about it. Michael was a teen, William's killed one of those before. What would be one more to him. But no, instead of killing or forcing Michael to be just like him, he left.

And then we get to the journals of William. If he felt no guilt, no remorse, if he was so sure of himself and what he was doing; he wouldn't have gone mad. You see a very obvious and gradual decrease of his mental health and how love turns into bitterness and hate. People who don't regret their actions with a situation don't suddenly have a mental break out of no where.

AND FINALLY. He keeps coming back, to anything Freddy's related specifically. As much as it's become a meme, there seems to be a reason for that. Freddy's is at the center of this, anyone with a knowledge of the attractions would be able to follow the same paper trail Michael did. Maybe, just maybe, William needs someone else to end him. He's dug his grave so far in that whatever has a hold on him, won't let go. He needs someone else to pull that trigger. Playing God only works but for so long until you have to sit down with yourself (which he has had to do a lot and not by choice) and go, "Y'know I don't like how this turned out." And once you admit one small thing to yourself, everything else eventually follows and smacks you.

So.

TL;DR William Afton is a shitty dude but fuck guys, he can still be an unwilling participant.

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

And we can't forget the canon implications surrounding Charlie's death either, namely that we aren't even sure William actually killed her.

We know he was THERE when she died, but unlike every other 8bit mini game death, there was no blood on Charlie

Several people have theorized that a combination of the cold, the rain, and the strain from being scared and alone was enough to overwork such a young child's heart. To my knowledge (yes that is a disclaimer) we don't ACTUALLY know for certain if it was even a murder at all! I'd like to think that with how consistent each 8bit mini game was, there would've been blood animations, like there was for William, when Charlie died IF she had been murdered.

But let's say William DID kill Charlie, this is where those implications I was talking about earlier come in. We learn from Midnight Motorist that William was an alcoholic, and with the clear absence of Elizabeth from the Afton household we're led to belive this is AFTER her death, but before Crying Child's. Put simply, William was NOT handling her death well. It's 100% possible that William was drunk the night he drove to the restaurant while Charlie was locked outside.

It's possible that he killed her on accident

William, in his drunken state, might not have even known that it was Charlie until the next morning, when Henry gave him the news.

So if Charlie WASNT murdered, or her death WAS an accident from poor decisions and grief, it's not unreasonable to see how little he actually planned at least her death.

Now I'm NOT saying he didn't kill the other children on purpose, because he did, HOWEVER his reason as he stated HIMSELF was so that he could give the children their happiest day, so he could make a family that couldn't leave him.

Remnant is THE driving force behind everything William does, because he knows that if he can keep it tethered to this world, the person is never truly gone.

I think that William, stricken with grief at the loss of his two youngest children, drove himself mad trying to save his family. He chased a power only made known to him once he saw Charlie was still hanging around after her death, he tried to play God, and like every character who tried to play God, was driven to insanity by it.

William believed he could save his children, and his grief made him desperate to put them back together, to fix whatever was left of them so he didn't have to say goodbye to them. He only wanted Michael dead once he actively tried to undo everything William gave his life to achieve. William could have killed Michael a thousand times ever, but he didn't, because he couldn't stand to lose the last of his children. But that desperation to hold onto whatever you have left CAN be overpowered. William could not let Michael destroy everything he achieved, it would, in William's mind, equate to sacrificing his life for nothing. To have given everything: his life, his family, his morals, his sanity. To have given everything he had just to watch it fail in the end was something William could not allow. So even if it meant killing his own son to protect what he had made, William was not going to fail

[joeygoeshollywood]

My 25 Favorite Films of 2020

Well, this was quite the crazy year, especially for movies. While many films that were slated to be released this year were postponed due to the coronavirus pandemic, this year still provided some laughs, tears, and thrills both in theaters and in the living room. 

(NOTE: Due to the delayed awards season calendar and postponed Oscar bait films that are unavailable to be seen before the end of 2020, this list will eventually be updated after having seen the following films: The Father, Minari, News of the World, Nomadland, One Night in Miami, Pieces of a Woman, Promising Young Woman)

Here are my 25 favorite films of the year:

25. Kajillionaire 

Quirky filmmaker Miranda July is back with her first feature in nearly a decade. Kajillionaire is a bizarre but captivating tale about a family of criminal grifters and how the daughter reevaluates her strained relationship with her parents after an outsider is welcomed into the fold. Evan Rachel Wood takes what could have easily been dismissed as a goofy caricature in Old Dolio (yes, that’s her name) and turns into a heartfelt portrayal of a woman whose lifestyle of freeloading dictated by her parents (played by Debra Winger and Richard Jenkins) becomes her own crisis. In many ways, Kajillionaire feels like a fantasy that keeps people asking, “What on earth is going on?” And this time, it’s for the best. 

24. Freaky

Revamping decades-old plots like the body-swapping antics from Freaky Friday can either result in a predictable failure or a surprising success. Thankfully, Freaky falls into the latter category. In this horror comedy, a deranged serial killer (played by Vince Vaughn) swaps bodies with his victim, a timid teen girl (played by Kathryn Newton). What makes the film work though are the dedicated lead performances, particularly by Vaughn, who is pretty convincing as young girl trapped in a grown man’s body. With a few good laughs and decent thrills, Freaky is worth the watch. 

23. The Outpost

The Outpost is an intense film about the real-life story of small group of US troops isolated by surrounding mountains in Afghanistan, under the constant threat of the Taliban, which ultimately comes to a head in the Battle of Kamdesh. The film captures the harrowing experiences of these soldiers with heart-pounding action sequences, which are fueled by a solid cast including Scott Eastwood, Caleb Landry Jones, and Orlando Bloom. 

22. Uncle Frank

Paul Bettany may be best known for playing The Vision in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, but he should be celebrated as his title character in Uncle Frank, a touching dramedy set in 1973 about an NYU professor who returns home to his estranged family for his father’s funeral while his niece, played by rising star Sophia Lillis, idolizes him for teaching her to be her authentic self while he keeps his sexuality a secret. Bettany brilliantly balances the coolness of his stature with the internal agony that ultimately hits a boiling point, which is counterbalanced by Peter Macdissi’s fun performance as Frank’s happy-go-lucky lover who accompanies him back home despite his wishes. 

21. Hillbilly Elegy

Hillbilly Elegy was panned by critics over politics that had absolutely no role the film. Based on the best-selling memoir by J.D. Vance, the newest feature from Ron Howard shows the journey of a boy who despite all odds growing up in a poor family that constantly struggled with abuse and addition managed to get into Yale Law School and achieve the American dream. While both Gabriel Basso and Owen Asztalos hold the film together as the younger and older Vance in the present and flashback scenes, Amy Adams as the impulsive, irresponsible mother and an unrecognizable Glenn Close as the no-nonsense inspiring grandmother that turn Hillbilly Elegy into an acting tour de force. 

20. The Trial of the Chicago 7

Oscar-winning screenwriter Aaron Sorkin sits in the director’s chair once again in this courtroom drama about the real-life protesters who showed up in Chicago during the 1968 Democratic National Convention. With themes that resonate today, The Trial of the Chicago 7 benefits from its sharp screenplay, well-paced editing, and an outstanding ensemble cast that includes Eddie Redmayne, Mark Rylance, Yahoo Abdul-Mateen II, Sacha Baron Cohen, Jeremy Strong, Frank Langella, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Michael Keaton. 

19. Yellow Rose

Broadway actress Eva Noblezada makes her film debut as an aspiring country singer on the run after her mother, an illegal immigrant, is obtained for deportation. Yellow Rose presents a nuanced depiction of US immigration, but at the heart of it is a heartbreaking story of a young woman who struggles between putting her family or her dreams first. Between Noblezada’s powerful performance and solid original music, Yellow Rose hits all the right chords. 

18. Palm Springs

Move over, Groundhog Day. While the Bill Murray classic has largely monopolized the time loop film genre, Palm Springs gives it a run for its money. Andy Sandberg and Cristin Milioti star as the unlikely duo who are stranded reliving the same dreaded wedding day involving mutual acquaintances and their desperate efforts to escape the seemingly inescapable. The Hulu comedy stands on its own two feet for the good laughs, the chemistry between the two leads, and the film’s emotionally-grounded plot.  

17. Let Him Go

Kevin Costner and Diane Lane reunite on the big screen after playing farmer parents in Man of Steel to rancher grandparents in Let Him Go, although this time they are able to display their full acting chops. In this period dramatic thriller, they set out to find their only grandchild following the death of their son only to discover that the widowed daughter-in-law remarried into an infamous crime family. While both Costner and Lane tug at the heartstrings, it’s Lesley Manville, who plays the ruthless matriarch of the family, that really takes command of the screen. Ultimately, Let Him Go is all about family and the lengths one is willing to go to protect it. 

16. Unhinged

In a year plagued by the pandemic, Unhinged led the way to the revival of movie theaters back in August and perhaps in some ways it was meant to be the film to do so as the themes of a rage-fueled society and the lack of human connection carry weight. Russell Crowe stars, as the title suggests, as an unhinged psychopath whose road rage torments a woman and her adolescent son. Unhinged is the epitome of pure entertainment and is why we go to the movies. While it’s not quite the most sophisticated thriller of the year, it’s still one helluva ride. 

15. Emma

Anya Taylor-Joy has had quite the year with both highs (The Queen’s Gambit) and lows (The New Mutants). But it began before the pandemic with the release of Emma, which she stars as the iconic Jane Austen title character, a socialite who meddles in the love life of others while refusing to acknowledge her own shortcomings in that department. Supported with a strong ensemble cast, beautiful production design, and comedic charm, Emma is not to be missed. 

14. The Invisible Man

ln the era of remakes and reboots, very few are as good as Universal’s latest monster flick revival of The Invisible Man. Elisabeth Moss stars as a woman who believes she’s being haunted by her abusive ex-husband, someone she becomes convinced faked his own death and is stalking her without being able to be seen. Filmmaker Leigh Whannell, the writer behind the Saw and Insidious horror franchises, generates good thrills and high-wire tension with the help of high production value and a terrifyingly-good performance from Moss. 

13. Dick Johnson is Dead

Documentarian Kirsten Johnson filmed a beautiful, intimate tribute to her father Dick Johnson, who has been suffering from Alzheimer's in the final years of his life. However, instead of dreading his death, both daughter and father embrace it by having him acting out several scenes of his over-the-top demises. Dick Johnson is Dead may focus on the subject manner of death, but this documentary actually celebrates life and the laughs that happen along the way. 

12. The Wolf of Snow Hollow

Perhaps one of the littlest-known films of the year, The Wolf of Snow Hollow is not your conventional indie comedy horror flick. Writer/director Jim Cummings stars as an overly-heated police officer who attempts to get to the bottom of a string of murders in his small, snowy Utah town by what appears to be some sort of werewolf, though he remains unconvinced. Featuring one of the final performances from veteran actor Robert Forster, The Wolf of Snow Hollow uses its quirky sense of humor to stand out from the rest of the pack. 

11. The Gentlemen 

The Gentlemen is a fun, action-packed, crime caper from Guy Ritchie about the London turf war of drug kingpins. Matthew McConaughey, Charlie Hunnam, Henry Goulding, Michelle Dockery, and Colin Ferrell all round out the strong cast, but its Hugh Grant that really steals the show as the comedically manipulative Fletcher, whose only allegiance is to himself. If you like a stylish film with well-choreographed violence and a fast-paced plot, The Gentlemen should be your cup of tea.  

10. Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom

Some of the best play-to-film adaptations are the films that feel like you’re watching a play, and Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom is one of them. Produced by Denzel Washington, Viola Davis gives a transformative performance as Ma Rainey, known as the “mother of the blues” and the clash she had with a pair of White music producers, but she also butts heads with her trumpet player (played by the late Chadwick Boseman), who also has his own music ambitions. While Davis obviously gives other Oscar-worthy performance, it was Boseman who was able to show how incredibly gifted he was as an actor. And while the world lost him far too soon, at least his last role ended up being his greatest. 

9. The Kid Detective

One of the biggest surprises of the year was how good a movie starring and produced by Adam Brody was. Brody plays a washed up former kid detective who attempts to revive his once-celebrated career of solving mysteries by getting to the bottom of a murder in his hometown. The Kid Detective is a brilliant dark comedy from newcomer writer/director Evan Morgan with good laughs, plenty of plot twists, and a career-best performance from Brody, who proves he’s more than just the pretty face from The O.C. we all know him as. 

8. Mank

Citizen Kane is widely regarded as one of the greatest films ever made and Mank is a worthy tribute. Gary Oldman stars as the title character Herman “Mank” Mankiewicz, the Oscar-winning screenwriter behind the iconic film. David Fincher (The Social Network, Gone Girl) managed to capture the epic scale of the 1941 classic that would make Orson Welles proud. 

7. Soul

Soul is one of those rare existential Pixar films that goes beyond being children’s entertainment. Following in the footsteps of 2015′s Inside Out, Soul depicts what happens to the soul of a jazz musician who’s convinced his time on Earth isn’t over. While the universe created to explain how souls work and the plot that went along with it falls short of its emotions predecessor, Soul is still high-caliber among Pixar films and a great movie for both kids and adults alike. 

6. Another Round

Perhaps the greatest work from Swedish director Thomas Vinterberg to date, Another Round follows four unsatisfied middle aged men who decide to take a theory of task from a Norwegian psychiatrist, who concluded that maintaining a blood alcohol level of 0.050 will enhance their mental and psychological state. Mads Mikkelsen, who’s best known to American audiences as Hannibal Lecter in the short-lived NBC series Hannibal and the Bond villain in Casino Royale, offers a strong, nuanced performance as one of the four educators who embraces this drinking challenge in a film that provides an equal balance of chuckles, cringes, and emotional gut punches. 

5. I’m Thinking of Ending Things

From the crazy mastermind of Charlie Kaufman, the writer behind Being John Malkovich, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and Anomalisa, his latest on Netflix is too a mind-bender. I’m Thinking of Ending Things is a surreal, zany, and at times disturbing examination of the human condition as the nameless female protagonist played by an incredible Jessie Buckley mulls over breaking up with her boyfriend (played by Jesse Plemons) while visiting his parents’ house. Accompanied with a stellar production design and a crazy-good performance from Toni Collette as “Mother,” Kaufman newest cerebral feature lives up to his iconic reputation of filmmaking. 

4. Da 5 Bloods

Spike Lee is one of the few genius filmmakers who is able to blend multiple genres together and his latest film is no different. Da 5 Bloods is an action adventure, buddy comedy, dramatic character study, and war movie all wrapped up into one about a group of Vietnam War veterans who return to the former battlegrounds to find the remains of one of their fallen soldiers as well as some treasure that they kept hidden years ago. With a strong ensemble cast that includes the late Chadwick Boseman, its longtime character actor Delroy Lindo who steals the show with his powerful performance. Da 5 Bloods is easily one of Netflix’s strongest films to date. 

3. The Assistant

One of the first #MeToo-era films, The Assistant offers the day in the life of a low-level female staffer of a production company who is haunted by the presence of her Harvey Weinstein-like boss (who never actually appears in the film). However, rather than depicting the dramatics of sexual misconduct, The Assistant uses the common subtleties and nuances of the workplace yet maintains the same tension and heartbreak. Anchored by the remarkable, devastating performance by up-and-comer Julia Garner (Ozark), The Assistant is as important as it is well-done. 

2. Sound of Metal

Riz Ahmed gives the performance of his career as a heavy metal drummer and former addict whose sudden battle with going deaf upends his life. Sound of Metal is an incredible experience that gives a rare glimpse in the American deaf community which is enhanced by the remarkable sound design that helps the audience actually hear what the musician is going through. It’s truly one of the most rewarding films of the year. 

1. The Climb

The Climb takes the generic “man sleeps with his best friend’s fiancé” storyline and turns it on its head. In his feature debut as writer and director, Michael Angelo Covino leads as the not-so-apologetic adulterer Mike and Kyle Marvin, who co-wrote the film, is the good-hearted Kyle who struggles to whether or not to forgive his best friend’s ultimately betrayal. Not only is The Climb is quirky and hilariously written, it’s a remarkably well-made comedy with some of the year’s best cinematography. Between a strong cast, a superb screenplay, and the extremely-high production value, The Climb is at the top of the mountain of 2020′s best films. 

[moral-turpitudes]

New Beginnings:

Masterlist | Rules | Peaky Prompts

Trigger Warnings: Swearing, Angst, Fluff, Mentions of Adoption, Slight Descriptions of Drug/Alcohol Abuse.

Word Count: 4,122

Characters: Johnny Dogs x Female!Reader (Polly’s Eldest Daughter)

Requested by: Anon, you can find it here. This was a bit challenging but I hope you like it! :)

Summary: Y/N and Michael Gray get the surprise of a lifetime when their blinder cousin Thomas and his friend Johnny Dogs show up at their doorsteps, but little does Y/N know what’s in store for her regarding the company.

“Is she alive?” Polly asked the local medium who’d been known for telling fortunes and such. The medium’s eyes were dark beneath her jewel-toned veil as she answered the female blinder.

“Your eldest, Y/N, is in London. Go find her and your boy Michael. He’s living on a farm out in the country side.” She said flatly, her voice void of emotion.

“And what about my youngest daughter, Anna?” Polly asked, knowing in her heart that the truth wasn’t always the easiest thing to hear.

“She’s dead.” She said, tightening her grip on Polly’s hand as she shook with emotion, tears streaming down her face as she remembered the little baby girl placed in her arms years ago before her death. Knowing too that her son and eldest daughter were ripped from her arms at such a young age after their drunk of a father died lodged between a boat and a dock in the cut.

“Thank you.” Polly said shakily before leaving. Putting a few shillings down on the table as the woman nodded and watched her leave.

“What’d you expect aye? She tells you what you want to hear Pol’....”Thomas said, as she told him about her meeting with the medium earlier that morning.

“I just needed confirmation is all. God I can’t believe they’ve been out there all these years. You have to help me find them Tommy. Please.” She said, pulling her hands to her mouth nervously as she bit at her nails. Her eyes still tinged red from crying and her makeup smudged slightly.

“I’ll do what I can with the information we have. Until then I think you should take the day off unless you think you can work in the condition you’re in.” He said, looking over the papers from her son Michael’s entry into an orphanage and then glancing at the adoption papers where he’d been named Henry.

“Henry of all names...can you believe it? Disgraceful.” She said.

“Any word on Y/N? She has to be nearing 28 by now. The poor woman will probably faint when she finds out.” She said, feeling herself wanting to close herself off into her apartment as the thought of re-kindling a barely-there relationship loomed over her.

“I’ve found her adoption papers. They kept her name, but she’s in London as far as this goes. This address is where she’ll be.” He said sliding the document towards her and running his index finger over the crinkled paper.

“Alright.” She said, shakily lighting a cigarette.

“Pol’...I’m serious. You need to prepare for this if this all works out alright? Can’t have our best woman down. We still need you.” He said, looking into her glassy eyes. Tears threatening to spill once again.

“I will. I’ll go home right now. But please bring them to me once you get them.” She said. Thomas nodded as he watched her walk out the door quickly. Her nerves rattled as she sped off to her lavish apartment that had been vacant for far too long.

“Johnny?” Thomas said over the phone, the rowdy traveler making it to a payphone to report how their latest burial was going.

“Oi! How are ya Tommy? Just got done burnin’ the old bastard. What’s next?” He asked.

“You’re going to help me get Polly’s children back. She has a son named Michael in his late teens and an older daughter named Y/N who’s 28.” He said quickly, checking his pocket watch.

“Christ....alright.” He said, looking out at the burning pile in the distance.

“It’ll help her make peace Johnny. She needs this for more than just her. For the whole family really.” He said.

“I know I know. If only that poor bastard Gray didn’t die a drunk then none of ya would be in that mess aye?” He said, a long silence lingering over the phone.

“Perhaps.” Thomas said, his mind remembering all the hell their family went through as they grew up. The poverty, the fights, the nights sitting up in fear as their father yelled at their mother, their mother succumbing to her visions and bouts of depression, the feuds with the other families around them, the long nights in the trenches of France, and the whole family business being shoved onto their shoulders with no parental guidance besides their aunt Polly. She being the one saving grace of the whole family.

As Thomas and Johnny drove out to meet Michael, Polly sat at home pacing back and forth as she wondered how the next few hours or even days would go. Knowing once Thomas put his mind to something he always tried to finish it, especially if it involved family.

“I’m here for Henry. His mother wants him home.” Thomas said bluntly to the woman who’d practically raised him.

“My Henry? I have the papers...He’s mine.” She said.

“Aye, and I have the papers too. I’m his cousin. And I know his birth mother would love nothing more than to see him since he was ripped from her arms. Let the man go and meet her. Once he’s done that he can make his decision.” He said, eyeing the woman coldly.

With tears in her eyes, the woman called for Michael to come forward, the fawn-haired young man running over to him.

“Hello Henry. Your mother wants to see you.” He said. Michael’s face evolving into one of confusion.

“But she’s right here? Who are you anyway?” He asked, a sassy tone to his voice that reminded Thomas of Polly.

“I’m your cousin Thomas Shelby. Your birth mother is Polly Gray. Your real name is Michael Gray. Now you can stay here on this little farm or you can leave to meet the woman who’s fought to find you for so many years. Which one will it be?” He asked impatiently, lighting a cigarette.

Michael nervously looked around and pulled his little sister in for a hug, telling her to be good and then giving his adoptive mother a hug. Knowing she was fuming inside.

“I-I’ll ring you alright? I’ve been wondering why I never had pictures here of when I was younger...and...I’ve been wondering why you all look different than me. I-I think it’s time I go find out for myself mum.” He said, giving her one last hug before going off with his blinder cousin and his friend Johnny Dogs.

“Now on to your sister.” Thomas said, driving off towards the busy London area.

---

Your head pounded as you got up. The drinks from the night before doing your head in as a sharp knock sounded at your apartment door. You shrugged on your red laced robe and lit a cigarette as you hastily put your wild locks in a bun, your eyes burning from the sunlight streaming in through the window nearby.

One more sharp knock sounded as you neared the door, making your blood boil slightly.

“Bloody hell. Hold on a moment will ya?” You yelled out, tying your robe around your nude frame. The stranger in your room snoring loudly in the back room of your haphazard apartment.

“What’s all this then? It’s a little early to be soliciting people don’t ya think?” You asked, blowing out a cloud of smoke as you took in the men before you.

One had piercing blue eyes, who had one of the coldest looks you’d seen on a man in a long time. Knowing he’d probably seen more hurt than happiness in his past years of life.

The other two had darker eyes, one of them younger and oddly familiar as you thought about your own facial structure. You had the same eyes. Eyes that never matched your adoptive parents. Eyes that the kids in the orphanage always picked on for being too brown in color when theirs were reminiscent of the sea and the sky and all the green earth in between.

The seemingly oldest of them looked on from the distance. His cigar dangling from his lips as his dark eyes scanned you up and down. He had a rough look to him, like he’s seen more sun than anyone here. That he’d lived everywhere and nowhere at the same time.

“Who are you all and why are you hogging my doorstep?” You asked.

“We don’t have a lot of time, but long story short, I’m your cousin Thomas Shelby. And this young man here is your brother Michael Gray. We only just found him. Your mother...Polly Gray...has been looking for you all these years.” He said bluntly.

“What? I thought she was dead or something. God knows father was.” You said, remembering the drunken man vaguely as well as a beautiful dark haired woman you were sure to have gotten your good looks from.

“You remember them?” Michael asked, a bit envious that his newfound sister was able to remember such a thing.

“Mhmm. Well...when do we meet her aye? I have some business to take care of.” You said, fiddling with your hands as Johnny continued to stare.

“Go do what you need to. We’ll wait out here.” He said.

“Who’s the rough looking fellow? A bit quiet aye?” You asked, pointing to Johnny.

He cleared his throat and took his cap off. His bright smile catching your eye as you blew smoke out from your lips.

“Sorry. I’m Johnny. Johnny Dogs. Traveler and helper of the Shelby family and such. Nice to meet you Y/N. Heard lots of good things ‘bout ya.” He said.

“Oh really? Like what? That I’m a drunk like me father? That I’m a whore?” She asked with a smirk, her laugh sending Johnny’s heart over the edge.

“Gods no. That you’re beautiful actually. Polly said so herself. She remembers ya well.” He said with a small smile that was soon extinguished by a cold glance from Thomas.

“Right....well I’ll be out in a moment.” You said with a slight smile, walking back inside and throwing your best clothes on and hurriedly doing your makeup.

“Well hello there love, who are you getting ready for this morning?” The man lying on your bed half naked murmured as you put on the last of your makeup.

“Get out.” You said, pulling your coat over yourself as you grabbed your purse.

“What? After last night you want me to leave?” He asked.

“What is this? A bed and breakfast? I said get the fuck out of me house!” You yelled, not even bothering to remember the lads name as you followed him down the hall, his pants put on haphazardly as he ran shirtless out the door.

“You’ll pay for this!” He yelled, causing the three men to look on curiously.

“Actually you did sir, thanks for the tip love!” You yelled.

“Fucking asshole.” You added under your breath.

“Who was that?” Michael asked as you got in their car.

“Just a joyride love. Don’t worry about it.” You said, not bothering to filter yourself as Thomas smirked slightly. You we’re definitely Polly’s daughter. There was no doubt about it.

As you all neared Polly’s house you and Michael exchanged a nervous look with each other, knowing you might as well have forgotten her since it’s been so long. Your adoptive parents never mentioning her unless you started acting up. But the vague memories you did have always swirled around in your mind.

“Here we are. She said you could stay there with her if that’s something you both want. But I’ll let you both go on.” Thomas said, helping you both up to the apartment.

You knocked hard on the door, your hands shaking as you looked to the ground. You hoped for this day for years but you never thought it would happen so soon.

“Do ya want me to help em’ wit their bags Tom?” Johnny whispered from the car as he watched the woman standing nervously with her brother.

“No. Just stay in the car.” He said, bringing the rest of the bags up to them as Polly opened the door.

“My god...” she said, her hair a bit disheveled as she adjusted her dress and shawl around her shoulders.

“Mum? H-hi. Um....it’s me...Y/N...and Michael.” You said with a small smile on your face.

She didn’t say anything, instead just rushing forward and enveloping you both in a hug as Thomas stood by awkwardly.

“Thank you. Tommy my god thank you.” She said, giving him a short hug as well as you and Michael made your way inside the lavish apartment.

“Just make sure you’re all at the office early tomorrow alright? We’ll have a family meeting.” He said, a small smile on his face that hadn’t been there in ages.

“We will.” Polly said, waving him and Johnny off as she closed the door behind her.

“Now Michael...I know you don’t know me very well. But I want you to know I’m here for you always alright? You too Y/N. I can’t believe I have you back.” She said giving you each a tight hug as you wiped tears from your eyes.

As the night went on you all both gradually settled in, Polly agreeing to let you go to your apartment when you wanted since you were of age. But for now you accepted your place here, wanting to get to know the woman you’ve searched for all your life.

“Michael...it’s alright if I call you that right?” She asked hesitantly.

“Mhmm. I-I guess it’s growing on me. Never felt much like a Henry.” He said, unpacking his things.

“Right, well I’ll leave you two for the night. I’ll be expecting you both up early for Tommy’s meeting tomorrow. Welcome to the family.” She said, her mind racing as she left the room. Her heart slowly mending back together after being torn to pieces so many years ago.

---

At the shop the next morning, Michael and you both walked in a bit on edge, having gotten the rundown from Polly about what the business entailed on the way there. The workers around you eyeing you up as you lit a cigarette and walked past them in your heels and red overcoat. Michael looking around as well but with a smug smile on his face as he made acquaintances with the younger blinders rather quickly.

“Alright so the new members of the family as you lot can see are Y/N and Michael Gray. They’ve both confirmed they preferred their natural names so that’s what you’ll all call them. The papers and everything else are being sorted to give Polly any parental rights, and Michael...I have a proposition for you.” He said eyeing the young man who had a tough-yet laid back demeanor about him. The innocence of his past life slowly fading the longer he stayed in Birmingham.

“Alright. What is it Tommy?” He asked, smoking a cigarette carefully since he’d only done so once before at college.

“You’re going with us to the races. After we see what you’re made of, I’ll consider you for an accounting position.” He said.

“Sounds good to me.” He said swallowing hard and looking towards his mother.

“It doesn’t bloody sound good to me. I’ve just gotten my children back and you want to put them through some peaky initiation?” Polly snapped at her nephew. Ada, Arthur, John, and Finn looking at you and your brother with curious eyes during the awkward silence that ensued.

“It’s the only way Pol’ he’ll be fine.” Thomas said flatly, his voice still void of emotion.

“What will I be doing? I can’t stay cooped up here all day.” You said, blowing a cloud of smoke from your lips as you stared down your blue eyed devil of a cousin.

“Well, you could work here with the rest of us or you could work with the Lee’s and the rest down at their stop. Think of it as being a liaison for us.” He said.

You looked around at the dark and cramped place, your mothers familiar eyes knowing what you’d pick. You were an adult and had been on your own for many years, knowing full well how to handle yourself for the most part and besides, if you got to get out in the open air for a while it wouldn’t be half bad.

“I can do that. Just tell me how to get there and I’ll go.” You said. Thomas handing you a map as he grabbed his car keys.

“You can still stay at the house you know.” Polly said as you gathered your things.

“I know mum. I’ll be back, it’s just work. Don’t worry.” You said giving her a hug and Michael a fake punch on the shoulder as you waltzed out the door.

“It’s better if I go with you. You don’t know them.” Thomas said, opening the door for you.

“....alright. Do I need to do anything before we go?” You asked.

“Just please tell me you know how to shoot a gun.” He said, starting the car.

“Just point and shoot right? I remember one thing before dad died and that was going hunting with him in the woods. Just that once.” You said.

“That should be good enough. Take this.” He said, handing you a small handgun from his jacket.

“Do I have to kill anyone?” You asked, the thought making a shiver run down your spine slightly.

“Only if they come after ya or the family.” He said.

You nodded your head silently as you understood. You’d heard of the blinders while being in London, and from Polly’s rundown before getting to the shop, but you’d never thought you’d be related to them in such a way. But maybe this was the start you’d needed. At least now you weren’t making a living off cleaning houses and singing in taverns.

“Here we are.” He said after a long while of silence. Your eyes adjusting to the bright sunlight that spread across the vacant land where a slew of vardo’s were parked. Bonfires lit near them as they sat around the flames. Various animals roasting on a spit as music played in the distance.

“This is where I’ll be?” You asked, not seeing an actual brick and mortar house in sight. But remembering bits and pieces of the old vardo you had grew up briefly in with your mum. Her late teenaged self doing the best she could to care for the three of you young children.

“Mhm.” He mumbled as he led you through the tall grass to the people you’d be spending most of your working days around.

“There they are! What a sight! How are ya Tom?” Johnny asked rather loudly, a smile dancing across his face as he greeted you with a quick kiss to your hand.

“Good. Y/N here is going to be staying every few days or so. She’s the new liaison between the families here. Teach her what ya know and show her where she can call from. She’ll be reporting to me about anything going on that may need our attention. Think of it as security aye?” He said, eyeing Johnny as he stared slightly at the gorgeous woman.

“Will do, will do. Say let’s get you shown around, we have a place for ya all set up.” He said, taking your hand in his which made you smile. A flush of red hitting your cheeks as you looked on at your new place of work.

“Don’t do anything stupid Johnny.” Thomas said threateningly, knowing he could sense that Johnny had some feelings for his cousin.

“No worries Tom.” He said, tipping his cap to him as he led you to a vacant vardo.

“So what’s a woman as beautiful as you doin’ round these parts anyway? Did Polly drive ya off already?” He asked, setting your luggage down.

“No. I volunteered to come out here. Didn’t wanna be cooped up in that old dusty building.” You said, brushing a stray hair behind your ear.

“Well you’re in luck, darlin’. No dusty buildings here. Just a few snakes though.” He said as you jumped slightly, eyes making a mad-dash to the ground.

“I’m just messing with ya, doll.” He said, leaning up against the back steps.

“Is it hard being out here all the time? I know a few bars in London we could go to sometime. Get ya out for bit.” You said looking into his brown eyes that glowed almost golden in the bright afternoon sun.

“Not as hard when we have pretty women such as yourself here. Say...I’ll take ya up on that offer. How ‘bout later this week after we show ya the ropes?” He asked.

“Sounds good.” You said, smiling as you helped him carry things to the pond nearby. Children running around and skipping stones as you both made small talk while washing various clothes.

“How long do you all stay out here? It’s beautiful.” You said after a while of learning how to do various chores.

“Oh about a month or so. Never too long in one place in case the coppers come by bootin’ us out. We belong to ourselves, not to them. The sooner you learn that the better off you’ll be here aye?” He said, a hint of warning in his voice.

“Did someone tip you off one day? I’d never do that. I’m just working for Tommy and me mum.” You said, never wanting to come between anyone’s business.

“Yeah. Lost a few people a couple years back. Wasn’t good. But that’s all done now. New beginnings aye Y/N?” He said raising his flask to your glass of whiskey as you all sat near the pond.

“To new beginnings.” You said, staring off into the sky as you realized you’d be here more often than you’d thought.

---

The next few weeks seemed to fly by as you got used to living half there and half at Polly’s place. It was a hard decision but one you felt deep down needed to be made as you sold your apartment in London to be closer to your mum and Michael. Turns out he wasn’t as good and innocent as he’d claimed to be, gradually going on business with the boys and coming back high as a kite on cocaine. It was something even you hadn’t done in a long while, and something you swore one night to never do again after a bad spill landed you in the doctors. So it was safe to say your hard partying days were over, except for when it came to Johnny.

Over the course of the few weeks you’d been working together and updating Tommy on the business there, you grew closer and developed feelings for the rowdy traveler. Johnny’s smile and snarky remarks always bringing a wide grin to your face when you’d hear him with the lads or when you’d both go off drinking with people at the camp. But unfortunately, good things seemed to come to an end once the month was up, seeing as Tommy visited at a bad time one night and caught the two of you together. You’d been slightly embarrassed, but didn’t think he had it in him to ruin a good thing. But ruining things was Tommy’s specialty.

The night was abruptly ended when he dragged a naked Johnny away from you and threatened to terminate both of your positions with the company if things continued. But you were stubborn and strong willed just like your mother, and kept seeing him anyways even if it meant you were out of the company.

“I don’t see why I can’t love one man Pol’ Tommy’s gone and probably fucked every woman in town! He’ll he has enough children by various women to worry about already and here he is worrying about what I do with my life and my time?” You yelled as you packed your things away. You’d discussed moving out there with Johnny to spare the family drama. Thomas could tell you liked it out there and he had to admit, you gave him good information on people you’d come across, even if it was by letter or by pay phone more often than in person. And Polly knew you were like her, wanting to be free to do whatever you pleased and as much as it pained her to see you leave for a life on the road, she loved that you were the only one who kept that spirit alive. The only one who decided to throw away the silver spoon you’d been fed with half your life, to live for yourself and for a man that made you happy, even if he worked for the blue eyed devil himself.

Johnny Dogs Tag List:

@flysafepapi, @gaytommyshelby, @ta-ka-shi-ma

If you’d like to be added/removed just send me an ask/message! :)

[burgundyhaven]

Send Her to Me: Teen! Kit Walker x Reader

Description: basically high school kit walker is trying to ask y/n out to the dance but everytime he tries to ask her out he keeps on missing her so he asks for his friends to send her to him

Word count: 1,702

Warnings: cursing, fluff? Nothing else that I can think of :)

A/n: I had a lot of fun making this, I’ve been in my 60s/70s phase as of recent so I’ve been listening to a lot of 60s garage rock and this is inspired by “send her to me” by the dark knights which is amazing you should go check the song out expeditiously. This is taking place in November of 1957 btw :)))) enjoy!!! Sorry if this is messy I finished writing this at 3:48 am  which explains lots of the spelling and punctuation errors it’s whatever 

Link to send her to me by the dark knights-https://youtu.be/BJKQks4neiI

It was November of 1957 and it was Kit Walkers final year of high school

He just wanted the stress of all of the work and uncertain future to be over

But there was one thing he would miss, you

He’s had a huge crush on you ever since you were in 9th grade, but only now worked up the courage to ask you out

You were putting your things away in your locker when you saw kit coming towards you

“Hey y/n”

“Oh- hi kit! what class you got next?”

“History. you?”

“English”

“Oh- uh… cool”

“Yeah.cool?” you chuckled

“Um-“

“Yeah?”

“Would you want to-“ he stops for a while

“Would I want to what?”

“Would you want to-“

he gets cut off by a loud bell

“Sorry! I gotta go i can’t be late again that’ll be three days in a row, catch you after this class though?”

“Oh. yeah sure” Kit says almost whispering and looking down at his shoes after waving at you

He went to history, though his attention was on the clock waiting for the next chance to see you

Finally, the bell rang and he went right to your locker, but…you weren’t there

He didn’t know, but you just didn’t need to go to your locker that class, but he knew he’d be able to talk to you in lunch

He went to his friends and asked them if they would send a message for him. He knew at least two of them had that class with you

“Hey- hold on wait, Jimmy tell y/n to meet me at the 6th lunch table, I keep on missing her at hall time”

“What for?”

“Nothing I just wanted to talk to her, if you don’t have her class next ask Henry I know he has the same class as her right now”

“Alright good luck… on whatever crazy shit your doing”

“Yeah thanks” he chuckled and looked down at his shoes

You were in your class when you saw one of Kits friends walking into your class, which was normal. But, he never talked to you in particular

He approached you and spoke quickly and quietly

“Kit wants you to meet him at the sixth table in the cafeteria in lunchtime”

“Why”

“I don’t know? He didn’t give a reason”

“Alright… thanks”

*45 minutes later*

Finally, it was lunchtime and he spotted you sitting alone in the corner of the cafeteria,where he told you to meet him

He walked over to the table and sat right in front of you

“Hey what’re you doing here all alone again”

you smiled and put a strand of hair behind your ear

“Sorry about forgetting to tell you i wouldn’t be at my locker, i forgot i didn’t need any books for my class after english”

“no don’t worry about it it’s fine”

“So what did you wanna tell me kit?”

“Oh,uh i wanted to actually show you something”

He walked over and dragged his lunch to your side and sat down

He pulled out a photo from his bag

“Here it is”

He slid the photo to your side

“Oh my god Kit! That’s us! God we were so little” you laughed

“But- how’d you find these i thought you lost all your pictures in the move”

“Yeah, but we found a tin inside of the box with my moms clothes and it had all my baby photos and stuff like that”

“You got any more?”

“Yeah, If you wanna come over afterschool and I could look through them with you. I haven’t gotten a chance to see them all yet?”

“Yeah, of course! we’d have to walk though, i can’t go alone”

“yeah that’s no problem,meet me by the front of the school at around 2:00?”

“K, see you then”

He knew this was going to work perfectly, you would be thinking about the past you guys had and then he’d ask you out and you would just have to say yes

2:00 came and you were out in front waiting for about 8 minutes, he was a little late but he came out eventually

“Sorry i kept you waiting so long. That son of a bitch Mr. Wells made me stay after class for not finishing the test in time”

“No don’t worry it’s okay,it’s only 2:08 you didn’t keep me waiting for that long” you said while smiling at him

“Alright,let’s go- wait did you call

your house and tell them you were coming over?”

“ Uh-yeah I told my mom i’d be home a little late and i’d be at your place for school”

“For school?”

“She wouldn’t let me at any guys house if it wasn’t school related,even though she’s known you since you were born”

“Makes sense” he laughs and looks at you

The cold november breeze made you start to shiver and you put your books close to your chest but it was no use

Kit noticed you were getting cold and gave you his jacket, and even though you told him you weren’t cold, he knew you just didn’t want to seem like you needed anything, so he put it on you anyways

you made it to his house and he got his key out

you went in and his parents weren’t home

His dad was at work, and his mom left a note saying she wouldn’t be home until around 8 as she was out running errands

“Well i guess this is my house for the after noon” he said smiling

You laughed and smiled back

You asked if he wanted his jacket back, but he said you could keep it, so you put it on completely

“So,you wanna eat anything?”

“No, thanks though”

“I’ll go get the box then wait here”

You sat on the couch and heard him coming down shortly after you touched down on the seat cushion

“got it!”

you sat on the floor and the both of you looked through the box and uncovered dozens of forgotten memories

“Oh my god that was your 12th birthday”Kit said pointing to a photo from 1952

“Look at this one we were babies here!” you pulled out the photo form the small stack

“Kit is that you?” you pointed to a picture of him in a bathtub as a baby

He grabbed it and slid the photo under the couch

“No uh- thats my cousin. You won’t see him much because he’s- twice removed? Yeah”

“Yeah sure. don’t be embarrassed you were cute”

“Yeah whatever” he rolled his eyes

“It’s so crazy that we’ve known each other literally since we were born” you say still looking at the pictures

“Well technically…i’m older by a month so since you were born” Kit whispers

“You’re only older because you were born premature” you patted him on the back while getting up to go to the couch

He got up to sit next to you and turned on the tv for background noise

He scooted in closer to you and eventually you found that he had his arm wrapped around you and you were falling asleep

“hey it’s only 4:15, wake up” he tapped your shoulder

“Yeah i know- i just went to bed super late last night and i-“

“No it’s fine- do you want me to drive you home i could use the extra one we have”

“no i uh- i like it here it’s quiet, plus i can’t sleep now. I won’t be able to make it to school tomorrow”

“y/n. Its Friday ?”

“Oh.yeah well still”

“Okay nevermind” kit faintly laughed

You got up to get a snack as you hadn’t eaten for quite some time,then went right back to the couch

You sat crossed on the floor, looking right at the pictures on the wall

You observed all of them, specifically just seeing how much he’s changed over the years

He suddenly spoke out of nowhere

“Hey, so you heard about that senior ball the schools havin in a couple weeks”

“Yeah what about It?”

“You uh- planning on going”

“Probably, I just don’t really have anyone to go with”

“If you want, I could take you. I- I mean it doesn’t have to be like as a date or anything we could’ve go as friends if you wa-“

You hugged him and stopped him from saying anything else

“Thank you so much kit,I didn’t wanna have to go alone.And… yes we could go as a date ”

“Really?” He scratched his neck

You nodded and looked at him for a while, contemplating what you were going to do

You kissed him, out of nowhere

Now, you had just had your first kiss, and he had just had his

It was extremely awkward afterwards, you both just stared at each other and didn’t know what to say

“So uh- what’re we gonna wear” you said, still being in front of him as you were after you kissed him

“ Uhhh- i”

“we could match?” You started to get up to leave

“Yeah, we could match “ he spoke breathily

“I- uh, I gotta go my moms probably worried sick about me it’s” 

you look down to check your watch 

“7:15!”

“I could drive you and take the spare car? It’s kinda cold out”

“Oh yeah thanks sure “

The short 7 minute drive was quiet but lovely and you couldn’t help but stare at him for the whole car ride

You arrived home and quickly  walked to the door

You rang the doorbell and your mom opened the door, she looked pretty pissed but nothing over the top

You turned around and Kit was still there in the car, and your mom moved away from the door

You walked back a little closer to the where his car was  and he said “ come by my place tommorow … for school”

You laughed quietly and whispered “yeah for school… goodnight kit”

“Goodnight”

And he drove away into the distance, back to his house

You went to your room, and got ready for bed, and all you could think about was Kit and the wonderful day you had with him. And about the wonderful day you would have with him tomorrow

[im-the-punk-who]

Hey, for some reason I am really struggling with the ages of the characters in black sails, can u help me out?

Absolutely! At least as much as I know!

The only one whose age we absolutely know is Eleanor. Madi, Billy, Vane, Jack, and Anne we can make educated guesses, but most everyone else is up for interpretation.

Eleanor is born around 1690 - she is 17 when she takes over from her father and drives Blackbeard out eight years before canon starts. So she is 25/26 at the start of the series.

Madi is a few years younger than Eleanor but old enough to remember her when she leaves in 1703(when the Rosario raids historically happened). If Eleanor is about 13, Madi could be anywhere from 6-10 but likely not any older. So she is probably up to 23 in canon. She is no older than 25.

Billy is in his teens between 1705 and 1715, so he is no older than 30. Likely he is more like 23-26, the same age as Eleanor and Madi. (If he was a mid-teen when he was taken, spent three years in impressment, and then crewed up with the Walrus at 18 around 1708, that would make him 26ish when the series begins. (Because Morley says that he crews up with them after Flint kills Alfred, but he has clearly been with the crew for at least a few years. Flint says he was still living with his parents when he was taken, which would be odd for someone older than 18ish - and he spends three years in the navy.)

Vane is likely around the same age, and a bit older than Jack and Anne. I usually go for around 26-35 at the stretch, because he would have been either a child or teen when he escapes Albinius, but that could be any time after about 1697. (So, if we assume he’s like, 12 when he escapes in 1700, he would be about 27 when the series starts. But you can play with that age range. We know he is in Nassau by 1703 and a young adult and Captain by 1707.

Jack/Anne we only have clues from others - they were teenagers when Vane found them fucking in Nassau. Anne says she met Jack sometime after she was 13, so if we assume they’re about 15 when they meet Charles and that they meet him fairly early, they could be as old as 27. Historically Anne was born in 1697 and Jack in 1682 so I tend to go somewhere in between since they’re shown to be close in age.

Silver we don’t really have any idea, since we don’t know anything about him. Since Luke was in his early 30s when he filmed, I tend to go with a bit younger than that given the tendency of the show to cast men younger. So like, 26ish? Maaaybe 30? Around the same age as Vane. 

Max, again, no clue. I tend to HC her in her mid 20s, but that is purely conjecture.

For Blackbeard/Hornigold/Gates, I really don’t know what the fuck to tell you. xD Historically they would have been about 35 in canon, but the show seems to view them as much older. Teach was born around 1680, Hornigold the same. Hornigold mentions he sailed with Avery, and that Gates has spent ‘50 years at sea’ with the implication Hornigold has known him most of that time. Also because Blackbeard is old enough to view Charles as his sort of biological son, I would take that to mean he would have probably been an adult when they met. Gates says he sailed with Avery “when he was a kid” and he had his first bunkmate Cregg then. Henry Avery sailed and took Nsssau in the mid 1690s but like...timelines idk. Maybe he’s using the colloquial ‘kid’. (Jack also says that Gates’ crew might at one point be hoping for a Captain ‘thirty years younger’ talking about Vane, so that’s likely the age gap between those two groups.)

Thomas Miranda and James we also have no idea. I personally tend to headcanon them in their late 30s/early 40s in 1715. My main point for this is James’ status as both a Lieutenant and a ‘rising star’ in 1705 - given his poverty I can see him having a late start in climbing the political ladder, but I would have a hard time believing someone older than his mid 20s would be considered a ‘rising star’ in the Navy in a time of relatively plentiful war, when James would have plenty of opportunity to advance. I usually go about 25 in 1705, which would make him mid/late 30s in canon. Thomas I tend to go a bit older bc he specifically says that some of his schoolmates are superiors of James’ - which doesn't really mean anything other than he’s old enough to be the same age as a well-to-do upper officer. Like, 30? ish? Maybe late twenties. However given his naivety about political schemes I can’t see him having been involved in politics during the Glorious Revolution in 1688. So like, if he was at most 15 in 1688, he’d be no older than 32 in 1705, 42 in 1715. And then Miranda goes in the middle, around 26/27 in 1705, 36ish in 1715. (But this is all like, super conjecture.  Pick your own headcanon!)

Hope that helps! <3

[astrognossienne]

scandalous star: gary cooper -an analysis

“I don’t like to see exaggerated airs and exploding egos in people who are already established. No player ever rises to prominence solely on talent. They’re molded by forces other than themselves. They should remember this – and at least twice a week drop to their knees and thank Providence for elevating them from cow ranches, dime store ribbon counters and bookkeeping desks. ” - Gary Cooper

He didn’t say much, but when he did, it carried a lot of weight. He was the archetypal hero of the Old West; the quintessential masculine ideal of the stoic and “strong silent type” that most Taurus men are. But for famously laconic Gary Cooper, his good looks and earnest, haunted eyes for decades made him the quintessential lonely American of motion pictures.He was a more equanimous, human protagonist versus boisterous, bigger-than-life Hollywood supermen. He was renowned for his quiet, understated acting style and his individualistic, emotionally restrained, but at times intense screen persona, which was particularly well suited to the many Westerns he made. He was a man’s man...as well as a ladies’ man. Cooper became a hero to many, even as he developed a reputation as one of the most notorious philanderers in Hollywood. Privately a debonair ladykiller with a taste for high society, he crafted an image as just the opposite from his prototype cowboy image he materfully portrayed on the silver screen. He was insatiable, before and during his marriage. How did he reconcile his moral righteousness onscreen (Taurus sun) with his philandering offscreen (Sagittarius moon)? That was the work of the fixers, gossip magazines, and the studio system at large, which ensured that Cooper was never caught, never denounced, and held up as a paragon of American values.

Gary Cooper, according to astrotheme, was a Taurus sun and Sagittarius moon. He was born Frank James Cooper in Helena, Montana, the second son of an English farmer from Bedfordshire, who later became an American lawyer and judge, Charles Henry Cooper (1865-1946), and Kent-born Alice (née Brazier) Cooper (1873-1967). As a child, he met a freed slave woman named Mary Fields, otherwise known as Stagecoach Mary, and so awed by her was she that he later wrote an account of his memories of her in Ebony magazine. His mother hoped for their two sons to receive a better education than that available in Montana and arranged for the boys to attend Dunstable Grammar School in Bedfordshire, England between 1910 and 1913. Upon the outbreak of World War I, Cooper’s mother brought her sons home and enrolled them in a Bozeman, Montana, high school. Upon graduation, he eventually matriculated at Grinnell College in Grinnell, IA, where he attempted to nurture a passion for drawing - until a serious car accident ended his college days in the summer of 1920. He would recover from his severely injured hip through an odd but painful therapy, horseback riding.

When his father retired from the bench and moved his mother to Los Angeles, Cooper gave up agriculture classes to try his hand as a Hollywood extra. Cooper played an extra in a handful of silent films before arriving on the set of The Winning of Barbara Worth in 1926. The actor cast as the second male lead didn’t show, and someone shoved Cooper into the part. He appeared with Clara Bow (who soon became one of his conquests) in her star-making film It, but it was his appearance in another Bow vehicle Wings, released later that same year, truly launched his career. He plays a World War I flying cadet, and although his screentime was still relatively short, there was one scene — an extended close-up shot, the light streaming in from outside — in which he looked gorgeous. In 1929, he filmed The Wolf Song with Lupe Vélez. He soon had an affair with Velez, who purportedly claimed that Cooper “has the biggest organ in Hollywood but not the ass to push it in well.” For more on their relationship, read my star analysis on Lupe.

Cooper filmed The Virginian — his first real “talkie,” and the film was a major hit and cemented the foundation of Cooper’s image. His ability to project elements of his own personality onto the characters he portrayed, to appear natural and authentic in his roles, and to underplay and deliver restrained performances calibrated for the camera and the screen helped make him a cinematic success, often lauded by those he worked with. However, his good looks and charisma made him a success with women, whether he worked with them or not. Over the next few years, Cooper was paired with the most gorgeous and promising female stars in Hollywood —with Carole Lombard in I Take This Woman (whom he slept with), Claudette Colbert in His Woman (whom he allegedly slept with), Marlene Dietrich in Morocco and Desire (who he famously slept with more than once), and Joan Blondell in Make Me a Star (who he allegedly slept with). In 1932, Cooper and his Paramount “rival,” Cary Grant, were cast against Tallulah Bankhead in Devil and the Deep (1932). Like Lupe Velez, Bankhead was a loose cannon, with most famous quote being:

“The only reason I went to Hollywood was to fuck that divine Gary Cooper.”

Amidst all his public and private action, Cooper began courting Veronica “Rocky” Balfe, a starlet who went by the stage name of Sandra Shaw. She was also best known as the blonde dropped by King Kong. The two were wed in late 1933. Balfe retired from the screen to become a wife and mother, with her giving birth to their only child, Maria, in 1937. Cooper portrayed a new type of hero—a champion of the common man—in films like Mr. Deeds Goes To Washington and 1941′s Sergeant York (which won him his first of two Best Actor Oscars). Cooper met Ernest Hemingway at Sun Valley in October 1940 and they were friends for the rest of his life. He co-starred with Ingrid Bergman (with whom he had a year-long affair with) in a the film adaptation of Hemingway’s For Whom the Bell Tolls. He kept starring in more films and bedding his female co-stars until he got more than he bargained for when he made The Fountainhead. Naturally, the 47-year-old Cooper had an affair with his co-star, the 21-year-old Patricia Neal. However, this time things got crazy: Neal wound up pregnant with Cooper’s child. He insisted she have an abortion. When Cooper’s long-suffering wife found out about the relationship, she sent a telegram demanding he end it. This didn’t work; he also confessed that he was in love with Neal, and continued to see her. Cooper and his wife legally separated in May of 1951. Cooper’s daughter Maria, by then in her early teens, famously spat on Neal in public. Neal later claimed that Cooper hit her after she went on a date with Kirk Douglas. Neal ended their relationship in late December 1951. Amid all this drama, Cooper starred in what is now regarded as his defining role: the beleaguered sheriff in High Noon, which won him his second Best Actor Oscar. In later life, he became involved in a relationship with the costume designer Irene, and was, according to Irene, "the only man she ever loved".

Maybe all his previous actions had an affect on him because Cooper converted to Catholicism in 1958, and reconciled with his wife and daughter. Also, he began starring in films that centered around searching for redemption, such as Friendly Persuasion (1956) and Man of the West (1958). In 1960, Cooper fell ill with prostate cancer, which quickly spread to his colon, lungs, and bones; he died of it shortly after his 60th birthday in 1961. A year after his death, Irene committed suicide by jumping from the 11th floor of the Knickerbocker Hotel, after telling Doris Day of her grief over Cooper's death. Regardless of his philandering, regardless of the arduous work of his studio’s publicity departments, there was something plaintive, almost childlike, maybe even innocent about Cooper, so he can easily be forgiven his sins. He acted out what mattered to millions of people, and that act made him a star beyond measure.

Next, I’ll focus on his former paramour Lupe Velez’s arch nemesis. A woman who happened to be wife of MGM art director Cedric Gibbons (Gary Cooper’s wife Rocky’s uncle). She was another pioneer of Mexican cinema who was arguably the first Latina to successfully crossover to Anglo audiences: Leo Dolores del Río.

Stats

birthdate: May 7, 1901

major planets:

Sun: Taurus

Moon: Sagittarius

Rising: Taurus

Mercury: Taurus

Venus: Taurus

Mars: Leo

Midheaven: Aquarius

Jupiter: Capricorn

Saturn: Capricorn

Uranus: Sagittarius

Neptune: Gemini

Pluto: Gemini

Overall personality snapshot: He was torn between an instinct to roam free and a determination to find security and make a solid, lasting contribution to the world. As he repeatedly changed horses in search of both ultimate certainties and high-spirited adventure at the same time, he could find himself deeply divided and uncertain. He sought to earth the fire from heaven and put it to work, but he found all too often that it would not let him rest. In his search for stability and security, he became a farmer and was immediately confronted with the changing seasons. He embraced the solid certainties of geology and are hit by an earthquake. He liked to feel the solid earth move. He sought certitude and permanence, yet his endless inquiries constantly confounded yesterday’s certainties. When he got his own uncertainties together (by accepting he wanted the best of both the changing and the unchanging worlds), he could have been a brilliant teacher, conversationalist, counselor, entertainer, wit, creative artist or entrepreneur – in fact he could have been anything he wanted. Once focused, he could be a human dynamo, and wonderfully humorous, witty and entertaining with it. As he discovered, his quest for solid material certainties did not make a happy bedfellow for his yearning for excitement and larger religious and spiritual understanding. In one way or another, be it through philosophy and the spiritual quest or through writing, music or art, he needed to put together and formulate a total vision of the universe which is based on unassailable facts yet satisfying to his idealism.

Constantly seeking, he was a natural agnostic, applying the criteria of science to counter woolly speculations, yet at the same time highly skeptical of the limited and statistical pronouncements of unthinking science. The danger, if he did not marry these elements within him, is that he would swing from one to the other and undermine the virtues of both. A restless changing of jobs, careers, partners, visions or aspirations left him drunk with his own spinning. When he deliberately tried to remain sober and commonsensical, it seemed to make matters worse for there was something of the gambler in him. This all-or-nothing streak can temporarily overcome your natural caution and enable you to burn your bridges (though you will usually ensure there is something tucked away for a rainy day). He felt an impulsive need to do things on a grand scale, to live with commitment, to feast on the world, and to understand what it was to be alive in all possible ways. He seemed to be called both to explore the reaches of the imagination and to build secure foundations. He brought far-reaching visions into manifestation, and these visions injected his conservative desire for stability and security with flair and colour. His vision of tomorrow and the larger world gave spice to any project he undertook. He saw endless possibilities and wanted to make them real. In this he could be the natural entrepreneur who saw economic opportunities at every turn, an inspiring counselor and teacher, and a stimulating companion whatever he did.

His well-shaped body displayed a warm attractiveness and ripeness. In his later years, he may have needed to watch the tendency to gain weight too easily. His strong broad shoulders supported a very large neck size. His most outstanding feature was his eyes and his gentle smile and voice. He was big-boned. He enjoyed dressing well, preferring soft colours. He was practical, steady and patient, but he could  be inflexible in his views. One thing he did have was plenty of common sense and good powers of concentration, although he tended to think that purely abstract thought was a waste of time. His thought processes weren’t as quick as others, but his decisions were made with a lot of thought behind them. He also had the welcome ability to bring people together. He needed to be able to show his originality and independence in any job for complete satisfaction. His work should also satisfy his scientific bent and humanitarian leanings. He needed scope for his inventiveness, because he was able to bring a fresh view to any job. Ideally, his work should permit him to express the idealistic side to him character and allow him to help as many people as possible. He could be extremely efficient in the way that he tried to get maximum result out of minimum effort. He didn’t like extravagance and waste. He was a thoughtful and resourceful person, who was well-informed on many subjects. Success came gradually and as a result of hard work. Success and growth, for him, were expressed by material and financial achievements, bringing status and prestige.Worldly success was well within his reach, because he possessed all the necessary talents to gain power, influence and status. He was practical, determined and patient. When there were hitches in his plans, he simply worked around them. He knew where he was heading to, and had already figured out the best way to use his talents to reach his goals.

Although he could be fairly pessimistic about life in general, it didn’t put him off aiming for the top. He could be very single-minded about reaching his goals, and was prepared to put his career interests above his personal happiness. He was extremely aware of his own worth. He was prepared to work beyond the call of duty. His strong sense of ambition gave him a certain rigidity, arrogance and selfishness in the eyes of others. He belonged to a generation with fiery enthusiasm for new and innovative ideas and concepts. Rejecting the past and its mistakes, he sought new ideals and people to believe in. As a member of this generation, he felt restless and adventurous, and was attracted towards foreign people, places and cultures. As a member of the Gemini Neptune generation, his restless mind pushed him to explore new intellectual fields. He loved communication and the occult and was likely also fascinated by metaphysical phenomena and astrology. As a Gemini Plutonian, he was mentally restless and willing to examine and change old doctrines, ideas and ways of thinking. As a member of this generation, he showed an enormous amount of mental vitality, originality and perception. Traditional customs and taboos were examined and rejected for newer and more original ways of doing things. As opportunities with education expanded, he questioned more and learned more. As a member of this generation, having more than one occupation at a time would not have been unusual to him.

Love/sex life: His sexuality was a wonderful combination of sensuality and basic laziness. He let himself be carried along by his pleasure-seeking instincts, greeting every new experience with fresh eagerness and then slowly draining from that encounter all the joy it has to offer. This passive, easy-going approach to sex not only made for good technique, it also conceals the egocentric strength and stubbornness that was at the core of his erotic nature. People don’t realize that beneath all that luxurious hedonism he was always the person in control. He was a conservative lover for whom appearances were always important. There may have been occasions when his sensuality lured him into indiscretions but he was quick to cover his tracks and hide the evidence. The quiet practicality of his sexual nature served as a handy antidote for his Martian braggadocio. He knew that he was the best there is but he was willing to sit back and let the world find out the good news on its own. In his youth Cooper was endorsed by several female “experts” of the time (such as Clara Bow, Marlene Dietrich and Tallulah Bankhead) as Hollywood’s sexiest man. His soft spoken and manly sex appeal projected just as well on the screen. After marrying at age 32, Cooper’s sex life became somewhat more sedate though he never lost his ability to attract women.

minor asteroids and points:

North Node: Scorpio

Lilith: Scorpio

Vertex: Libra

Fortune: Capricorn

East Point: Taurus

His North Node in Scorpio dictated that he needed to be careful not to let the more emotional side of his personality overwhelm him. Instead, he should have set out to consciously develop his more practical abilities. His Lilith in Scorpio ensured that he was dangerously attracted to those women who seduced and conquered on a daily basis; who liked life intense and was judged for her sexuality and general vibe and learned early on how to deflect moral judgments. His type of women may have been tried in the court of public opinion but no way were they going to show up for the sentencing. His Vertex in Libra, 6th house dictated that he llonged for a union of souls that was based on a model of pure peace and justice. Images come to mind of a mythical life on Venus, the planet of love, where there is never a discordant beat between lovers, but rather, continual harmony even if played in the minor chords. Physical lust was certainly a necessary aspect of two beings eternally intertwined, but the platonic component far outweighed it in importance for him. He had an attitude of duty, obligation and sacrifice when it came to heartfelt interactions. The negative side was the tendency to become hypochondriacal or martyristic to get the love he so desperately wanted. There was a need for others to appreciate the sincerity of his intentions, to the daily tasks he executed in a conscientious and caring way and for others to know that his actions, no matter how routine they may seem, were based on devoted love. His Part of Fortune in Capricorn and Part of Spirit in Cancer dictated that his destiny lay in creating practical and long-lasting achievements. Success came through hard work, determination, responsibility and perseverance. Fulfillment came from observing his progress through life and seeing it take a form and structure that will outlive him. His soul’s purpose guided him towards building security in his life, both emotional and material. He felt spiritual connections and the spark of the divine within his home and family. East Point in Taurus dictated that he was more likely to identify with the need for pleasure (including the potential of liking himself) and comfort.  

elemental dominance:

earth

fire

He was a practical, reliable man and could provide structure and protection. He was oriented toward practical experience and thought in terms of doing rather than thinking, feeling, or imagining. Could be materialistic, unimaginative, and resistant to change. But at his best, he provided the practical resources, analysis, and leadership to make dreams come true. He was dynamic and passionate, with strong leadership ability. He generated enormous warmth and vibrancy. He was exciting to be around, because he was genuinely enthusiastic and usually friendly. However, he could either be harnessed into helpful energy or flame up and cause destruction. Ultimately, he chose the latter. Confident and opinionated, he was fond of declarative statements such as “I will do this” or “It’s this way.” When out of control—usually because he was bored, or hadn’t been acknowledged—he was bossy, demanding, and even tyrannical. But at his best, his confidence and vision inspired others to conquer new territory in the world, in society, and in themselves.

modality dominance:

fixed

He liked the challenge of managing existing routines with ever more efficiency, rather than starting new enterprises or finding new ways of doing things. He likely had trouble delegating duties and had a very hard time seeing other points of view; he tried to implement the human need to create stability and order in the wake of change.

house dominants:

12th

9th

8th

He had great interest in the unconscious, and indulged in a lot of hidden and secret affairs. His life was defined by seclusion and escapism. He had a certain mysticism and hidden sensitivity, as well as an intense need for privacy. Traveling, whether physically across the globe, on a mental plane or expanding through study was a major theme in his life. He was not only concerned with learning facts, but also wanted to understand the connections formed between them and the philosophies and concepts they stood for. His conscience, as well as foreign travel, people and places was also of paramount importance in his life. He loved the totality of the human experience and embraced the whole cycle of human life, including birth, sex and death. His darker side, and the complexes and emotions that he preferred to keep hidden, even from himself was a theme throughout his life. His ability to undergo deep personal transformations and spiritual regeneration was also highlighted.

planet dominants:

Venus

Saturn

Sun

He was romantic, attractive and valued beauty, had an artistic instinct, and was sociable. He had an easy ability to create close personal relationships, for better or worse, and to form business partnerships. He believed in the fact that lessons in life were sometimes harsh, that structure and foundation was a great issue in his life, and he had to be taught through through experience what he needed in order to grow. He paid attention to limitations he had and had to learn the rules of the game in this physical reality. He tended to have a practical, prudent outlook. He also likely held rigid beliefs. He had vitality and creativity, as well as a strong ego and was authoritarian and powerful. He likely had strong leadership qualities, he definitely knew who he was, and he had tremendous will. He met challenges and believed in expanding his life.

sign dominants:

Taurus

Sagittarius

Capricorn

His stubbornness and determination kept his around for the long haul on any project or endeavour. He was incredibly patient, singular in his pursuit of goals, and determined to attain what he wanted. Although he lacked versatility, he compensated for it by enduring whatever he had to in order to get what he wanted. He enjoyed being surrounded by nice things. He liked fine art and music, and may have had considerable musical ability. He also had a talent for working with his hands—gardening, woodworking, and sculpting. He sought the truth, expressed it as he saw it—and didn’t care if anyone else agreed with him. He saw the large picture of any issue and couldn’t be bothered with the mundane details. He was always outspoken and likely couldn’t understand why other people weren’t as candid. After all, what was there to hide? He loved his freedom and chafed at any restrictions. He was a serious-minded person who often seemed aloof and tightly in control of his emotions and her personal domain. Even as a youngster, there was a mature air about him, as if he was born with a profound core that few outsiders ever see. He was easily impressed by outward signs of success, but was interested less in money than in the power that money represents. He was a true worker—industrious, efficient, and disciplined. His innate common sense gave her the ability to plan ahead and to work out practical ways of approaching goals. More often than not, he succeeded at whatever he set out to do. He possessed a quiet dignity that was unmistakable.

Read more about him under the cut.

Actor Gary Cooper was born on May 7, 1901, in Helena, Montana. Spanning from the silent film era to the early 1960s, Academy Award-winning actor Gary Cooper built much of his career by playing strong, manly, distinctly American roles. The son of English parents who had settled in Montana, he was educated in England for a time. He also studied at Grinnell College in Iowa before heading to Los Angeles to work as an illustrator. When he had a hard time finding a job, Cooper worked as a film extra and landed some small parts. After his appearance in

The Winning of Barbara Worth

(1926), a western, Cooper's career began to take off. He starred opposite silent movie star Clara Bow in Children of Divorce (1927). Cooper also earned praise as the ranch foreman in

The Virginian

(1929), one of his early films with sound. Throughout the 1930s, he turned in a number of strong performances in such films as A Farewell to Arms (1934) with Helen Hayes and Mr. Deeds Goes to Town (1936) directed by Frank Capra. Cooper received an Academy Award nomination for his work on the film. Cooper continued to excel on the big screen, tackling several real-life dramas. In Sergeant York (1941), the played a World War I hero and sharpshooter, which was based on the life story of Alvin York. Cooper earned a Best Actor Academy Award for his portrayal of York.

The next year, Cooper played one of baseball's greats, Lou Gehrig, in The Pride of the Yankees (1942). Again, he scored another Best Actor Academy Award nomination. Appearing in a film adaptation of Ernest Hemingway's For Whom the Bell Tolls,  Cooper starred opposite Ingrid Bergman in a drama set during the Spanish Civil War. This role garnered him a third Academy Award nomination. In 1952, Cooper took on what is known considered his signature role as Will Kane in High Noon. He appeared as a lawman who must face a deadly foe without any help from his own townspeople. The film won four Academy Awards, including a Best Actor win for Cooper. In addition to his excellent on-screen performances, Cooper became  known for his alleged romances with several of his leading ladies, including Clara Bow and Patricia Neal. The affair with Neal, his co-star in 1949's The Fountainhead, reportedly occurred during his  marriage to socialite Veronica Balfe with whom he had a daughter. Their marriage seemed to survive the scandal. By the late 1950s, Cooper's health was in decline. He made a few more films, such as Man of the West (1958), before dying of cancer on May 13, 1961. (x)

[blackdiamondwrites127]

The Royal House of Trastámara (Redux)

So since the Trastámara family has become even more complete with the addition of Juan, I figured I'd make redo of this post! So here are the daughters and son of the Royal House of Trastámara.

Link to original post

Isabella of Aragon, Queen of Portugal

The eldest child of Ferdinand II of Aragon and Isabella I of Castille, Isabella was named after her mother and became the heir presumptive to the Crown of Castille after her mother took the throne from her uncle Henry IV of Castille. She was betrothed and married to Prince Afonso, heir and only son of John II of Portugal. Her marriage with the prince was a happy one but unfortunately, Afonso died due to a riding accident and Isabella vowed never to marry again. Until six years later, after the death of John II of Portugal, his brother, Manuel I of Portugal, usurped the throne and asked for Isabella's hand in marriage. Her parents offered Maria's hand instead out of respect to Isabella's wishes to never marry again but Manuel refused. Eventually, she married him and became queen consort of Portugal. She later gave birth to her only son, Miguel de Paz, Prince of Portugal, and due to her poor health and constant travelling during the later stages of her pregnancy, she died within an hour of her son's birth.

In her second life, Isabella owns and works in her own music shop located just below her flat. She sometimes fills in for Maria on the drums whenever she's sick and just generally enjoys the simple things in her second life. She's grown to be very passive due in this life and can be quite sarcastic at times which may come off as rude but she means well. However, bad mouth her younger sister she'll go after you.

Isabella Trastámara belongs to @lexartsstuff.

John, Prince of Asturias

was the only son of Isabella I of Castile and Ferdinand II of Aragon who survived to adulthood. John was born in Seville in 1478 to the sovereigns of Castile, Isabella I and Ferdinand II. John's birth helped consolidate Isabella's position as sovereign as she had given birth to a legitimate male heir. At the time of his birth, he had one elder sister Isabella; his younger sisters were Joanna, Maria, and Catherine. During his early years, Isabella and Ferdinand came to plan a double alliance with Maximilian I, Holy Roman Emperor, for the marriage of his children, Archduke Philip the Handsome and Archduchess Margaret of Austria. On 20 January 1495 in Antwerp, a preliminary alliance, which included a wedding of Prince John with Maximilian's daughter was agreed. Similarly, Maximilian's son Philip and John's sister Joanna were to be married. Joanna left Spain to marry Philip the Handsome in late 1496. Philip's sister, Margaret of Austria, aged 18, married John on April 3 the following year in Burgos Cathedral. It was a good marriage and John was devoted to Margaret. On 4 October 1497, a messenger came to John's parents and informed them that their son lay dangerously ill in Salamanca. He and his wife Margaret had arrived a week earlier, on the way to the wedding of his older sister in Portugal. Ferdinand was with his son as John died in the arms of his former tutor Fray Diego Deza. Two months later, on December 8, the Princess of Asturias gave birth to their only child, a stillborn girl.

When he was reincarnated, he found that he was blind in one eye but that didn’t stop him from having the time of his life. He’s very fun loving, happy, energetic and a bit oblivious at times. He’s married to Margaret of Austria, who he calls Maggie. He works as a costume designer for SIX the musical, mainly so he can see his baby sister more. He now goes by Juan rather than John as a ay to stay in touch with his spanish roots.

Juan Trastámara belongs to @weirdbutdecentart100.

Joanna of Castille, Queen of Castille and Aragon

The second eldest daughter of Ferdinand II of Aragon and Isabella I of Castille. Known historically as 'Joanna the Mad' or 'Juana la Loca' in spanish, she was Queen of Castille and Queen of Aragon. Modern Spain evolved from the union of these two kingdoms. Joanna was married by arrangement to Philip the Handsome, Archduke of Austria of the House of Habsburg. Following the deaths of her brother, John, Prince of Asturia, her elder sister Isabella, and her nephew Miguel, Joanna became the heir presumtive to the crowns of Castile and Aragon. When her mother died, Joanna became Queen of Castile. Her father proclaimed himself Governor and Administrator of Castile. Despite being the ruling Queen of Castile, Joanna had little effect on national policy during her reign as she was declared insane and imprisoned in the Royal Convent of Santa Clars in Tordesillas under the orders of her father, who ruled as regent until his death, when she inherited his kingdom as well. When her son Charles I ruled as king, she was nominally co-monarch but remained imprisoned until her death.

In her second life, Joanna or Juana as she preferred to be called, came back a troubled teen. In her misfortune, she was taken in by a very religious and abusive family. The father, named Fernando, would often lock her up in a dark room whenever she had mental breakdowns which are usually bouts of painful laughter. She finally escaped the house and was homeless for years until she found her youngest sister, Catalina. Catalina helped her by housing her until she got back on her feet and got the help she needed for her mental wellbeing.

Juana 'la loca' Trastámara belongs to @ellielovesdrawing.

Maria of Aragon, Queen of Portugal

The third eldest daughter of Ferdinand II of Aragon and Isabella I of Castille. After the untimely death of her older sister, she married her husband Manuel I of Portugal and replaced her as queen of Portugal. As a queen, she wasn't that involved in politics at all and her focus consists mainly of religious teachings, sewing and child rearing. Although, she is sometimes credited for convincing her husband into acts of 'mercy' whenever he flew into a fit of rage. During her marriage and reign as queen, she gave birth to ten children. Eight of whom reached to adulthood. She was constantly pregnant most of her adult life. Only having a few months in between pregnancies and giving birth to her tenth child caused her untimely demise.

Reincarnated into the modern world, Maria woke as a young woman in her early twenties. She's a laid back woman and loves the experience of a good party or a night at a club. She's not as religious as she was in her past life. Not atheistic per se. She'll go to church if she feels like it and even wears a rosary bracelet as some sort of connection to her religion was raised and taught in. She has a friend with benefits that she has fun with weekly. She is 100% childfree in her second life because ten pregnancies in her past life was way more than enough for her. Despite being childfree, she still adores children so she had applied for uni and took up an education course. Graduating after four years and landing her first teaching job at a private academy where Hal and his siblings and cousins go to. That was where she reunited with Catalina during a PTA meeting and the two sisters have never been happier to meet again in their second lives. They then set up a meeting where she reunites with their older sisters, Isabella and Juana.

Maria Trastámara belongs to yours truly.

Catherine of Aragon, Queen of England

The youngest daughter of Ferdinand II of Aragon and Isabella I of Castille. Catherine was three years old when she was betrothed to Arthur, Prince of Wales, heir apparent to the English throne. They married but Arthur died five months later. She was the first known female ambassador in European history. Catherine subsequently married Arthur's younger brother, Henry VIII. For six months, she served as regent of England while Henry VIII was in France. In 1525, Henry VIII was infatuated with Anne Boleyn and dissatisfied that his marriage to her had produced no surviving sons, leaving their daughter, the future Mary I of England, as heir presumptive at a time when there was no established precedent for a woman on the throne. He sought to have their marriage annulled, setting in motion a chain of events that led to England's schism with the Catholic Church. When Pope Clement VII refused to annul the marriage, Henry defied him by assuming supremacy over religious matters. Their marriage was consequently declared invalid and Henry married Anne on the judgement of clergy in England, without reference to the pope. Catherine refused to accept Henry as supreme head of the Church in England and considered herself the king's rightful wife and queen, attracting much popular sympathy. Despite this, she was acknowledged only as dowager princess of Wales by Henry. After being banished from court by Henry, she lived out the remainder of her life at Kimbolton Castle, and died of cancer.

In her second life, Catherine or Catalina as she prefers to be called to avoid confusion with the other C/Katherines, found herself in a house with her ex husband's five other wives. Tensions were high on the first few months, especially between her and Anne Boleyn but the six soon got things settled and managed to create a family dynamic within their shared home. They created a musical about their stories and garnered quite the success. She mostly acts as the head matriarch of the house. Making sure that everyone was alright and knew not to cause any trouble that might get them hurt. The addition of their children being reincarnated made her even more attentive, caring and loving to her new found family.

[blackswaneuroparedux]

Vivant, il a manqué le monde ; mort, il le possède.

- François René de Chateaubriand (1768-1848), Vie de Napoléon, livres XIX à XXIV des Mémoires d’outre-tombe (posthume)

Of course we don’t have any photograph or film of Napoleon’s death on 5 May 1821 on Saint Hélène. But we do have the next best thing: a painting. Charles de Steuben depiction of Napoleon's deathbed and his faithful entourage that served as witnesses to his dying moments became the one of the most important paintings of the post-Napoleonic era but then faded from modern memory.

I first came across it by accident when I was in my teens at my Swiss boarding school. There were times I found myself with school friends going away on hiking trips around the high Alpine chain of the Allgäu Alps and we would drive through Lake Constance to get there, or we would hike around the Lake itself through the Bodensee-Rundwanderweg.

Perched high above Lake Constance and nestled in large parklands, stood Schloss Arenenberg which overlooks the lower part of Lake Constance. At first, it appears a relatively modest country house. But this was no usual pretty looking house. Arenenberg was owned by well-heeled families before it was sold to Hortense de Beauharnais, the adopted daughter and sister-in-law of the French Emperor himself, Napoleon Bonaparte. She had it rebuilt in the French Empire style and lived there from 1817 with her son Louis Napoleon, later Emperor Napoleon III, who is said to have spoken the Thurgau dialect in addition to French. This elegantly furnished castle then was once the residence of the last emperor of France.

The alterations made first by Queen Hortense and later by Empress Eugénie have been carefully preserved and the house still bears the marks of both women. Queen Hortense's drawing room is perfectly preserved and visitors can still admire her magnificent library (all marked with the Empress' cipher) containing over one thousand books. Likewise, in the room where the queen died, every object has been maintained in its original condition: pieces of furniture and personal belongings are gathered here to evoke her memory in a very touching manner. As for Empress Eugénie's rooms, they too have been very carefully preserved. Her private drawing room is a perfect illustration of the Second Empire style with sculptures by Carpeaux and portraits of the imperial family by Winterhalter.

After 1873, the Empress and the Imperial Prince brought the palace back to life by making regular summer visits, which they continued until 1878. However, on the tragic death of her son in 1879, Eugénie found it difficult to return to a place so full of painful memories. And so in 1906 she donated the estate to the canton of Thurgovie as a testimony of her gratitude for the region's faithful hospitality towards the Napoleon family. And in accordance with the Empress' wishes, the residence was turned into a museum devoted to Napoleon.

In what is now the Napoleonic Museum, the original furnishings have been preserved, and the palace gardens had been fully restored. This in itself might be worth a visit for the view over Lake Constance which is stunning. For Napoleonic era buffs though its the incredible art collection which is its real treasure. It houses an important art collection including works by the First-Empire artists Chinard Canova, Gros, Robert Lefèvre, Gérard, Isabey and Girodet-Trioson, and by the Second-Empire painters and sculptors Alfred de Dreux, Winterhalter, Carpeaux, Meissonier, Hébert, Flandrin, Detaille, Nieuwerkerke and Giraud.

But what caught my eye was this painting, ‘La Mort de Napoléon’ by Charles de Steuben. I didn’t know anything about it or the artist for that matter, but one of my more erudite school friends who, being French, was into Napoleonic stuff in a huge way, and she explained it all to me. Of course I knew a fair bit about Napoleon growing up because my grandfather and father, being military men themselves, were Napoleonic warfare buffs and it rubbed off onto me. I just knew about Napoleon the military genius. I never thought about him once he was beaten at Waterloo in 1815. So I never really engaged with Napoleon the man. And yet here I was staring at his last breath of mortality caught forever in time through art. Not for the first time I had mixed feelings about Napoleon Bonaparte, both the man and the myth (built up around him since his death).

On 5 May, 1821, at 5.49pm in Longwood House on the remote island of St Helena, in the words of the famed French man of letters,  François-René de Chateaubriand, ‘the mightiest breath of life which ever animated human clay’ came no more. To the British, Dutch, and Prussian coalition who had exiled Naopleon Bonaparte there in 1815, he was a despot, but to France, he was seen as a devotee of the Enlightenment.

In the decade following his demise, Napoleon’s image underwent a transformation in France. The monarchy had been restored, but by the late 1820s, it was growing unpopular. King Charles X was seen as a threat to the civil liberties established during the Napoleonic era. This mistrust revived Napoleon’s reputation and put him in a more heroic light.

Fascination with the French leader’s death led Charles de Steuben, a German-born Romantic painter living in Paris, to immortalise the momentous event. Steuben’s painting depicts the moment of Napoleon’s death and seeks to capture the sense of awe in the room at the death of a man whose legendary career had begun in the French Revolution. It was this, ultimate moment that Steuben wished to immortalise in a painting which has since become what could almost be described as the official version of the scene.

There is no question that Steuben’s painting became the most famous and most iconic depiction of Napoleon’s death in art history. In another painting, executed during the years 1825-1830, Steuben was to give a realistic view of the emperor dictating his memoirs to general Gourgaud. This same realism also pervades his version of Napoleon’s death, and it is totally unlike Horace Vernet’s, Le songe de Bertrand ou L’Apothéose de Napoléon (Bertrand’s Dream or the apotheosis of Napoleon) which, although painted in the same year, is an allegorical celebration of the emperor’s martyrdom and as such the first stone in the edifice of the Napoleonic legend.

And what a legend Napoleon’s life was turned into for time immemorial. Napoleon declared himself France’s First Consul in 1799 and then emperor in 1804. For the next decade, he led France against a series of European coalitions during the Napoleonic Wars and expanded his empire throughout much of continental Europe before his defeat in 1814. He was exiled to the Mediterranean island of Elba, but he escaped and briefly reasserted control over France before a crushing final defeat at the Battle of Waterloo in 1815.

Napoleon’s military prowess earned him the fear of his enemies, but his civil reforms in France brought him the respect of his people. The Napoleonic Code, introduced in 1804, replaced the existing patchwork of French laws with a unified national system built on the principles of the Enlightenment: universal male suffrage, property rights, equality (for men), and religious freedom. Even in his final exile on St. Helena, Napoleon proved a magnetic presence. Passengers of ships docked to resupply would hurry to meet the great general. He developed strong personal bonds with the coterie who had accompanied him into exile. Although some speculate that he was murdered, most agree that Napoleon’s death in 1821, at the age of 51, was the result of stomach cancer.

By contrast, Charles de Steuben was born in 1788, his youth and artistic training coinciding with Napoleon’s rise to power. He was the son of the Duke of Württemberg officer Carl Hans Ernst von Steuben. At the age of twelve he moved with his father, who entered Russian service as a captain, to Saint Petersburg, where he studied drawing at the Art Academy classes as a guest student. Thanks his father's social contacts in the court of the Tsar, in the summer of 1802 he accompanied the young Grand Duchess Maria Pavlovna of Russia (1786–1859) and granddaughter of Frederick II Eugene, Duke of Württemberg, to the Thuringian cultural city of Weimar, where the Tsar's daughter two years later married Charles Frederick, Grand Duke of Saxe-Weimar-Eisenach (1783–1853). Steuben, then fourteen years old, was a Page at the ducal court, a position for which the career prospects would be in the military or administration. The poet Friedrich Schiller was a family friend who at once recognised De Steuben's artistic talent and instilled in him his political ideal of free self-determination regardless of courtly constraints.

At the behest of Pierre Fontaine in 1828 de Steuben painted La Clémence de Henri IV après la Bataille d'Ivry, depicting a victorious Henry IV of France at the Battle of Ivry. De Steuben's Bataille de Poitiers, en octobre 732, painted between 1834 and 1837, shows the triumphant Charles Martel at the Battle of Tours, also known as the Battle of Poitiers. He painted Jeanne la folle around the same time and he was commissioned by Louis Philippe to paint a series of portraits of past Kings of France.

Life in the French capital was a repeated source of internal conflict for Steuben. The allure of bohemian Paris and his military-dominated upbringing made him a wanderer between worlds. As an official commitment to his adopted country he became a French citizen in 1823. However, the irregularity of his income as a freelance artist was in contrast to his sense of duty and social responsibility. To secure his family financially, he took a job as an art teacher at École Polytechnique, where he briefly trained Gustave Courbet. In 1840 he was awarded a gold medal at the Salon de Paris for his highly acclaimed paintings.

The love of classical painting was a lifelong passion of Steuben. He was a close friend to Eugène Delacroix, the leader of the French Romantic school of painting, whom he portrayed several times. Steuben was also part of this artistic movement, which replaced classicism in French painting. "The painter of the Revolution," as Jacques-Louis David was called by his students, joined art with politics in his works. The subjects of his historical paintings supported historical change. He painted mainly in sharp colour contrasts, heavy solid contours and clear outlines. The severity of this style led many contemporary artists - including Prud'hon - to a romanticised counter movement. They preferred the shadowy softness and gentle colour gradations of Italian Renaissance painters such as Leonardo da Vinci and Antonio da Correggio, whose works they studied intensively. Steuben, who had begun his training with David, felt the school was becoming increasingly rigid and dogmatic. Critics praised his deliberate compositions, excellent brush stroke and impressive colour effects. But some of his critics felt that his pursuit of dramatic design of rich people also showed, at times, a pronounced tendency toward the histrionic.

The portrayal of key moments in Napoleon’s dramatic military career would feature among some of Steuben’s best known works. But it is this death scene that Steuben is most remembered for.

Using his high-level contacts among figures in Napoleon’s circle, Steuben interviewed and sketched many of the people who had been present when Napoleon died at Longwood House on St. Helena. He wanted to attempt o give the most accurate representation of the scene possible. Indeed, the painter interviewed the companions of Napoleon’s captivity on their return to France and had them pose for their portraits. Only the Abbé Vignali, captain Crokat and the doctor Arnott were painted from memory. The Grand maréchal Bertrand made sketches of the plan of the room, noting the positions of the different pieces of furniture and people in the room. All the protagonists within the painting brought together some of their souvenirs and in posing for the painter, each person can be seen contributing to a work of collective memory, very much with posterity in mind.

Painstakingly researched, Steuben painted  a carefully composed scene of hushed grief. Notable among the figures are Gen. Henri Bertrand, who loyally followed Napoleon into exile; Bertrand’s wife, Fanny; and their children, of whom Napoleon had become very fond.

The best known version of “La Mort de Napoléon” was completed in 1828. French writer Stendhal considered it “a masterpiece of expression.” In 1830 the installation of a more liberal monarchy in France further boosted admiration of Napoleon, who suddenly became a wildly popular figure in theatre, art, and music. This fervour led to the diffusion of Steuben’s deathbed scene in the form of engravings throughout Europe in the 1830s. As Napoleon’s stock arose within French culture and arts, so did Steuben’s depiction of Napoleon’s death. It became a grandeur of vision that permeated Steuben’s masterpiece of historical reconstruction.

Initially forming part of the collection of the Colonel de Chambrure, the painting was put up for auction in Paris, on 9 March 1830, with other Napoleonic works, notably Horace Vernet’s Les Adieux de Fontainebleau (The Fontainebleau adieux) and Steuben’s Retour de l’île d’Elbe (The return from the island of Elba). The catalogue noted that the painting had already been viewed in the colonel’s collection by “three thousand connoisseurs” – which alone would have made it a success -, but its renown was to be further amplified by the production of the famous engraving. The diffusion of this engraving by Jean-Pierre-Marie Jazet (1830-1831, held at the Musée de Malmaison), reprinted and copied countless times throughout the 19th century, made the scene a classic in popular imagery, on a level of popularity with paintings such as Millet’s Angelus.

A / Grand Marshal Henri-Gatien Bertrand. Utterly loyal servant of Napoleon’s to the last. His memoirs of the exile on St Helena were not published until 1849. Only the year 1821 has ever been translated into English.

B / General Charles Tristan de Montholon. Courtier and companion of Napoleon’s exile. Montholon managed to ease Bertrand out and become Napoleon’s closest companion at the end, highly rewarded in Napoleon’s will, which Montholon helped write. Montholon’s untrustworthy memoirs were published in 1846/47.

C / Doctor Francesco Antommarchi. Corsican anatomy specialist. Sent by Napoleon’s mother from Rome to St Helena to be Napoleon’s personal physician on the expulsion of Barry O’Meara. Napoleon disliked and distrusted Antommarchi. Antommarchi’s untrustworthy memoirs were very influential and published in 1825.

D / Angelo Paolo Vignali, Abbé. Corsican assistant-chaplain, sent by Madame Mère from Rome to St Helena in 1819.

E / Countess Françoise Elisabeth “Fanny” Bertrand and her children: Napoléon (F), who carried the censer at Napoleon’s funeral; Hortense (G); Henry (H); and Arthur (I), youngest by six years of all the Bertrand children and born on the island. She was wife of the Grand Marshal, very unwilling participant in the exile on St Helena. Her relations with Napoleon were difficult since she refused to live at Longwood. She spoke fluent English. Was however very loyal to Napoleon.

J / Louis Marchand. Napoleon’s valet from 1814 on and one of his closest servants. As Napoleon noted in his will, “The service he [Marchand] rendered were those of a friend”.

K / “Ali”, Louis Étienne Saint-Denis. Known as “the Mamluk Ali”, one of Napoleon’s longest-serving and intimate servants; He became Librarian at Longwood and was an indefatigable copyist of imperial manuscripts.

L / Ali’s English (Catholic) wife, Mary ‘Betsy’ Hall. She was sent out from England by UK relatives of the Countess Bertrand to be governess/nursemaid to the Bertrand children. Married Ali aged 23 in October 1819.

M / Jean Abra(ha)m Noverraz. From the Vaud region in Switzerland. Very tall and imposing figure that Napoleon called his “Helvetic bear”. He was himself ill during Napoleon’s illness.

N / Noverraz’s wife, Joséphine née Brulé. They married in married in July 1819, and she was the Countess Montholon’s lady’s maid. Noverraz and Saint-Denis had a fist fight for the hand of Joséphine.

O / Jean Baptiste Alexandre Pierron. The cook, dessert specialist, long in Napoleon’s service and who had accompanied Napoleon to Elba.

P /Jacques Chandelier. Iincorrectly identified on the picture as Santini who had left the island in 1817. A cook, from the service of Pauline Bonaparte, Napoleon’s sister, who arrived on St Helena with the group from Rome in 1819.

Q /Jacques Coursot. Butler, from the service of Madame Mère, Napoleon’s mother, he arrived on St Helena with the group from Rome in 1819.

R / Doctor Francis Burton. Irish surgeon in the 66th regiment who had arrived on St Helena only on 31st March 1821. He is renowned for having made Napoleon’s death mask (with ensign John Ward and Antommarchi).

S/ Doctor Archibald Arnott. Surgeon in the 20th regiment. Brought in to tend to Napoleon in extremis on 1 April 1821.

T/ Captain William Crokat. A Scot, orderly officer at Longwood for less than a month, having replaced Engelbert Lutyens on 15 April. He received the honour of carrying the news of Napoleon’s death back to London and also the reward, namely, a promotion and £500, privileges of which Lutyens was deliberately deprived by the governor.

[demisexualemmaswan]

till the summer comes again

Summary:  “I wonder if the snow loves the trees and fields, that it kisses them so gently? And then it covers them up snug, you know, with a white quilt; and perhaps it says, "Go to sleep, darlings, till the summer comes again.”- Lewis Carroll Emma has been dating Killian for two years, and since then their family unit has only gotten closer. But that could change with the arrival of Eloise Gardner, Killian’s ex. Oh, and has Emma mentioned she’s pregnant? Not exactly. A sequel to six impossible things before breakfast. 

[Read on Ao3] A/N: It is 10:40pmEST on my posting date for @csjanuaryjoy​ and here I am getting this right under the wire. I did not intend to be posting this late, nor did I necessarily intend to write a sequel for a fic that I wrote two years ago and quite frankly had no intention of continuing. But here we are.  At any rate: enjoy this CS January Joy fic!  --

Pregnant.

Emma stared at it for what felt like a minute, and then looked at the other one just to be sure.

Pregnant.

And then she picked up the third one just to be safe.

Pregnant.

A veritable tempest of very conflicting emotions all swirled within her. Joy. Excitement. Nervousness. Dread. Fear.

She nearly grabbed her phone to text Killian to tell him right away, but a wave of nausea was stronger than all of it and she put her head in the toilet. “Seriously?” she complained, her hand curling protectively over her stomach. “Your brother Henry wasn’t like this, you know,” she admonished softly.

“Emma?” A hesitant knock sounded at the door, and the timid voice of Alice, Killian’s daughter, wafted in gently. “Emma, are you sure you’re okay? I’m sure Papa wouldn’t mind just bringing some Granny’s home if you wanted to stay in. I could make you some tea while we wait.”

Emma closed her eyes and considered her options as she kept her head pressed against the cool porcelain. On the one hand, staying at home sounded nice. On the other, Henry and Alice cherished family dinner night at Granny’s. They would certainly be flexible if Alice’s concern was anything to go by. But Emma knew that with the teen years on the horizon, they would only get so many more of these together.

“Emma?” Alice repeated.

“Mom?” Henry’s voice joined Alice’s.

“There is no need to get the Spanish inquisition together,” she told them, sitting up. “Something’s not sitting right with me, but I’ll get some soup at the diner and it’ll be fine.”

“Why don’t we go to the diner, make the order to go and then bring it back?” Henry suggested. “That way Mom doesn’t have to sit so long but we can still go!”

“I’ll text Papa!” Alice said excitedly, and Emma heard the thump of her footsteps as she sprinted away from the bathroom door.

Emma just smiled affectionately, even though neither of her kids could see her. She had to stop that thought for a moment, reflecting on how much had changed in the past two years. Ever since that fateful incident with the bullies, she and Killian had worked and built a relationship and a life together.

They’d bought a bigger apartment together, although with two almost teenagers and now a baby on the way she’d have to reconsider her whole living situation and maybe they’d have to buy a house.

She loved the life that she and Killian built so far. He was attentive, caring, and so good with Henry. And she’d come to love Alice’s tender heart, her creativity, and her sweet tooth. Though she hadn’t articulated this to Alice or Killian yet, admittedly too afraid to break the contentment she finally experienced for the first time in her life.

Emma knew, logically, that both Alice and Killian’s hearts were big enough that this would only strengthen things and not break them, but the little lost girl that lived in Emma’s brain loved to remind her of Neal at every opportune moment and stop her from feeling secure in her relationship.

She was working on this. With Archie every week. Sometimes Killian was there and sometimes she was alone. But she was working on it every day. And she wasn’t alone and her relationship baggage. Killian had told her about Milah, who was not Alice’s mom but had been sleeping with him while she was married and that ended poorly. She could see it in the way Killian’s jaw clenched whenever Alice’s mom came up in conversation.

Alice had stopped asking after a while, but the weight of her mother and the unanswered questions sometimes hung in her interactions with Emma.

 “Emma?” Alice had returned to the door.

“Mom, are you dead?” Henry asked worriedly, jiggling the doorknob.

“I’m okay,” Emma called back. “I just…needed a minute.” She quickly cleaned up the mess up so the kids wouldn’t stumble upon the pregnancy tests by accident. She opened the door and soon had her arms full of two twelve-year olds, who she squeezed close to her. “Hey, it’s okay. We’ll still have family dinner, just like always,” she hummed. She leaned over and kissed the top of their heads. “Now go get your shoes.”

Henry dashed away to go get his shoes, but Alice stayed curled in close to Emma for a moment longer.

“You okay, star?” Emma asked softly. Alice smiled a little bit against Emma’s side. The one time Emma had called her “starfish”, Alice had made it abundantly clear that she was only her father’s starfish. So Emma had compromised and asked how she felt about star. So Emma’s star she became.

“Mhmm. Just glad you are too,” Alice said softly, gently squeezing her.

Emma’s nausea greatly protested at the action, but she wouldn’t dare let it show on her face. Alice clearly needed reassurance, which Emma was more than happy to give. “C’mon, let’s go get see your Dad, hmm?”

Alice beamed up at her and raced off into the other room. Emma couldn’t help but smile, knowing that in her heart of hearts that Henry and Alice would be incredible older siblings.

But first she had to tell them.

--

As per their usual tradition, Alice and Henry went scampering off to the jukebox to play some songs, but Killian said that since they were only picking up food to go that they needed to compromise on the song choice rather than switching the two.

Over her shoulder, she could see the two kids having like a good natured argument as they flipped through the song choices. Warmed in thought, she swiveled on the counter stool to look at Killian.

“Are you sure you’re feeling all right, love?” Killian asked worriedly, his hand gently cupping her face.

Two years ago, she certainly would have no idea how integral Killian would become to her well-being. And it wasn’t bad before when she lived alone. She could take care of herself fairly easily and her son.

But to have a true and equal partner, who she could depend on and support, fall back on and push up when they needed meant more than she could say. For the first time in a long time, with Killian,  nothing ever truly felt like that much of a struggle. Sure there were arguments and tension sometimes, but with Killian…she didn’t feel like she was white knuckling her grip through life.

Except for the fact that she was white knuckling a napkin in her hand right now, but that was more from nerves because she wanted to keep things the way they were. They’d never talked about kids, though they were both fairly young parents.

Another child wouldn’t be completely unreasonable.

“Love?” Killian’s voice brought her back out of her head. “Is everything okay?”

Looking into his eyes, Emma was warmed by the love and support she saw there. “Yeah, uh…” she started shyly. Her heart began to pick up faster and faster in her chest. “There’s just…something I need to tell you?”

“You know you can tell me anything,” he murmured, kissing her forehead. She smiled and dropped her head, smiling at her lap.

“Yeah, I know,” Emma laughed softly. “It’s just…” She picked her head back up, only for her smile to fade. Killian’s jaw was clenched tightly and his eyes blazed as he looked beyond her. “Killian?”

“What the hell are you doing here?” Killian snarled, jumping off his stool and striding toward a woman who was now standing near Henry and Alice.

“Hello, Killian.” The woman’s voice seemed pleasant enough, but it struck a chord with Emma in a way she did not enjoy. She leaped off her chair and ushered the children in close to her. The woman narrowed her eyes at Emma. “Who is this? And why is she near my daughter?”

“Your daughter?” Emma repeated, dumbfounded.

“You lost every right to call her that over a decade ago, Eloise,” Killian growled, effectively putting himself between Eloise and Emma. “She’s my daughter. How did you even find us?”

“I was interested in getting to know my daughter a little bit better,” Eloise replied, that too pleasant voice still grating on Emma’s last nerve. “I’ll certainly be seeing you all very soon.”

Emma felt Alice’s quivering against her side, and she held the girl a little bit closer. “It’s okay,” she whispered, watching Eloise’s retreating form. “You’re okay…”

“Papa?” Alice asked gently, gingerly peeking her head around Emma. “Papa, is she really my mother?”

Killian sighed, running a hand through his hair, clearly taking in the confused and devastated look from his daughter. His gaze met Emma’s, looking for a courage or absolution, she wasn’t sure quite which. But she was more than happy to grant it to him.

She certainly was no stranger to shitty exes.

So she nodded and gave him a small smile, doing her best to communicate with him that it was okay, that they would work through this new trial together.

Killian exhaled calmly, and a little smile crossed his face as well.

--

When they got home, Alice and Killian went to Alice’s room to talk privately.

“Shouldn’t this be a family conversation?” Henry asked worriedly. “What if she comes back when Alice and I are at school or something?”

“It is not our place to demand to be a part of that conversation,” Emma said patiently. “If Neal came back, do you think you’d want Alice to know right away or would you rather talk to me first?”

“I’d definitely want to talk just us first,” Henry admitted. “But I’d still want to tell Alice.”

“I think she will,” Emma laughed softly, kissing his head. “Just give her some time. It’s…it’s hard for her.”

“So what can I do, Mom?” Henry asked, his gaze flickering to Alice’s closed door. “Alice is my best friend, she’s practically my sister. I don’t want her to feel like she has to do this by yourself.”

She proudly smiled at her son, her heart near fit to burst. Henry’s acceptance of Killian only reaffirmed that he would make a fantastic older brother to his new brother or sister when the time came. “They really are our family, aren’t they?” she asked softly.

Henry nodded, grinning from ear to ear. “Nice of you to catch up,” he teased, his hazel eyes sparkling with mirth. The joy faded for a moment when he added, “But seriously, Mom? How am I supposed to help her?”

Emma reached across the table to hold her son’s hand. “I think you just ask her how you can best support her and follow her lead. She’ll tell you whatever she’s ready to tell. And if she doesn’t want to talk about it and not want to think about it, then you can distract her and make her feel better.”

Henry thought over this advice before hugging her again. “I love you, Mom.”

“Love you too, kid,” Emma said softly, kissing his head as she cupped the back of it. “You know you’ll always be number one in my life?” she asked him.

“Yeah,” Henry said. “But I can make room for some other people if need be.”

“Good,” Killian replied softly. “The Jones are quite so lucky to be loved by the Swans.”

She was so focused in giving Henry advice that she didn’t even see Killian enter the room until Henry got up to hug him tightly. Killian squeezed him before adding roughly, “Alice is playing Smash Brothers if you want to go play with her.”

Henry dashed off, leaving the two adults in the room alone.

Killian was quiet for a moment before he gently pulled Emma into his arms. “I don’t think I tell you what a good job you’ve done with him on your own,” he told her softly against her hair. “He’s an incredible young lad and his heart is so big…he’s really become such an incredible man without the presence of Neal…”

“He’s so lucky to have men like David and you in his life,” Emma murmured, wrapping her arms around him to give him all the comfort he could want. She held him for a moment longer before asking, “So, how can I best support you, Killian?” He took in a shuddering breath and she squeezed him.

“Whatever your history with that woman is, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Emma promised softly against his skin. “You know I’m always going to see the best in you.”

“And I you,” Killian promised, kissing the top of her hair. “Can we…can we go to the couch?” he asked and she nodded, gently pulling him along to the living room. She sat, and looked back at Killian and tilted her head as he watched her appraisingly. “Are you feeling better? The kids were saying you were poorly.”

“If we’re gonna do some sharing, I can share after,” Emma said, her heartbeat picking up again as she thought about telling him about her pregnancy.

Killian sat across the couch from her and gently took his hand in hers. “I…I was young. Just broken up with Milah and just…not wanting to deal with the pain of losing her. So I was a bit…promiscuous, thinking it would just make it stop hurting.”

“I’m sure you never ran in short supply,” Emma teased lightly, just wanting to see the smile back in his eyes.

He huffed a laugh and gave her a small but cheeky smile. “Aye, my partners certainly never complained except if they were telling me not to stop.” She smiled and gently squeezed his hand again. “And one night I met Eloise at the bar.”

He stopped, looking down again. Her thumb gently dragged across his knuckles and she waited for him to speak again. She didn’t say anything, just kept the drag of her thumb across his knuckles consistent.

“I didn’t…I wasn’t…” Killian sighed. “I thought I’d made it clear that I didn’t want anything beyond a one night stand. But she kept coming to the bar. Or my coffee shop and…and she was a distraction. We didn’t do much talking. And it felt good…”

“But she kept pushing your boundaries and you were so hurt, and she made you forget that you hurt that it didn’t seem important to reinforce them,” Emma blurted out, guessing the story. His eyebrow raised a little and he pulled her into his lap with a strained laugh. “Trust me, babe,” she replied. “How do you think I ended up with Neal?”

Killian nuzzled her shoulder for a moment, as if to soothe the sting of the past. “It gets worse,” he admitted quietly. “She…she kept seeking me out to get pregnant on purpose. So she could trap me with her.”

“Oh my god,” Emma breathed in deeply, looking over her shoulder quickly to make sure Alice didn’t hear that part. “How did you get out with Alice?”

“A few weeks after Alice was born, I came home and she was just…gone. She left a note saying she wouldn’t be bound any longer and good luck,” Killian said wryly. “Little did she know that she gave me the greatest blessing of my life and it led me to the second greatest blessing of my life.”

“Granny’s?” Emma teased weakly, resting her head against his.

“Aye,” he laughed, kissing her shoulder. “Granny’s.” He closed his eyes for a moment, and her entire body seemed to relax in his hold. Even her nausea seemed to settle, knowing that he was here and holding her. “Is there something you wanted to tell me, love?”

Suddenly Emma’s whole world crashed down her ears, and her old wounds came kicking and screaming to the surface. She couldn’t possibly tell him right on the heels of that. What if he really wouldn’t be happy about having another baby? What if he thought she was trapping him just like Eloise did with him?

“Just that, um, I might take a personal day tomorrow so if you wanted to take Alice out of school, she and I can have a girl’s day,” Emma said softly, curling into him, hating how her nausea had returned full force.

Killian stilled, eying her again. After a moment, he seemed satisfied with what she’s said and relaxed as he held her close to his chest. “I love you, Emma,” he murmured softly. “So much.”

“Yeah,” Emma replied hollowly. “I love you too.”

--

Emma made sure to make Alice’s favorite breakfast—sunny side up eggs with a side of scrambled toast and orange marmalade—before the girl woke. She even made a plate for herself, delighted that her future child would give her something to eat.

When Alice walked into the room, her eyes lit up at the breakfast. “Is this for me?” she asked excitedly.

Emma laughed. “Of course. I figured you’d like your favorite breakfast on your day off,” she said, pushing the plate toward Alice.

“Your stomach seems to enjoy the marmalade,” Alice giggled. “I told you marmalade is great!”

“When you’re right, you’re right,” Emma said fondly. “Well, today is your day and we can do whatever you want?”

“Whatever?” Alice asked hopefully, her blue eyes sparkling with joy. “Anything I want?”

“Yeah, it’s a self-care day!” Emma laughed. “So you tell me what you want to do today and we’ll do it!”

“Can we go to the library?” Alice seemed to get more excited by the minute. “And then the bakery?”

“You got it, star,” Emma said softly, grinning fondly. “And if you wanna talk, that’s okay. And if you don’t want to talk, we don’t have to do that either.”

The use of her nickname made Alice pause, picking nervously at her crust. “Emma?” she asked softly. “If…if Eloise becomes part of my life…am I still your star?”

“Of course,” Emma replied without any hesitation. “You’re my star, and yo—I mean Eloise can’t take that away from us. And just because she gave birth to you doesn’t mean she has to be part of your life if you don’t want her to be.”

“Will you get jealous if I do?” Alice asked quietly, still picking at the crust of her toast.

“I mean, I’ll miss you if you choose to spend more time with her,” Emma said honestly. “I like hanging out with you. Video game nights with you and Henry are my favorite. But also…if this is what’s going to make you happy, then of course I’m going to support you.” She leaned over and tapped Alice’s nose. “Besides…you have your father’s heart. I know you have plenty of love in your heart.”

Alice looked at her, the same way Killian had the night before. And then she gently leaned over to hug Emma tightly. “I love you, Emma,” the girl promised.

Emma would definitely blame the pregnancy hormones for the way she teared up and held Alice even closer to her. “I love you too,” she whispered. “And I can’t wait to spend the day with you, star. Should we go to the library first?”

“Yeah!” Alice said excitedly and bounded out of the room with unbridled enthusiasm.

Emma worked on getting dressed, pausing only once to run her hand over her bump, before heading out with Alice. She was relieved to see Alice’s viviacious spirit returned as Alice talked about all the books she wanted to read, what books she’d been waiting for, and what books the girls in her class were reading.

They were only a few blocks away when Emma had the strangest feeling something was wrong. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Eloise following them, but Emma made sure that she kept Alice close.

She wasn’t entirely sure why Eloise was so close, and she hoped it was a coincidence. The lack of formal channels or communications made her nervous and Emma was worried about making a wrong move.

“Emma, can we go to the second floor first?” Alice asked, gently tugging on her hand. “That’s where are the old books are!”

“Lead the way,” Emma chuckled warmly. She made sure to duck around some shelves when they entered to see if Eloise was still following them. When Emma didn’t see her on the second floor, she let out quick sigh of relief, and watched Alice scamper down the aisle.

And then something collided with the back of her head and everything went black.

--

Emma had the faintest memory of weakly calling for Alice, for her daughter, faces swimming around her while her hand stayed firmly around Alice’s and then everything went dark again.

But she knew she was in a hospital bed now, she recognized the beep of the machines anywhere.

“Of course I want to bloody press charges!” Killian’s voice was a little too loud, but she was thankful that he was there. If he was with her, it meant Alice and Henry were safe. “She hurt Emma! She was going to kidnap Alice!”

He sighed, deflating a little bit at whatever response David gave him. “Yes, I can bring her down tomorrow to be interviewed. Emma is gonna need some rest…your detectives will have to come here, as Emma’s under observation for another day or too…”

Emma forced her eyes open and gently squeezed his hand. Killian’s head snapped toward her and his eyes filled with tears. “She’s waking up. Tell Alice and Henry that we love them so much and it’s all going to be just fine. Yeah. I’ll speak to your later Dave.” Emma couldn’t even get a breath in edgewise before Killian frantically pressed his lips to hers. “Hey,” she rasped softly. “I’m okay.”

“Aye, I know,” Killian choked out. “Eloise is my…but I still…and then the doctor told me that you…” His eyes searched hers and he realized. “That’s what you wanted to tell me yesterday, wasn’t it? That’s why you were ill…”

“I’m sorry,” Emma said quietly. “I was so scared that after seeing Eloise you’d think I was trying to trap you in a life with me.”

“Emma,” Killian whispered softly, crushing his forehead against hers. “How could you possibly think that I’d be trapped in any kind of life with you? I love you more than anything besides our children.”

“Old wounds,” she replied softly. “Between the first time I did this alone and Eloise making an untimely reappearance I just…my fear got the best of me. I figured I could wait until things settled down before telling you…I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

He laughed wetly, gently pebbling her face with kisses. “Emma…you are such an extraordinary woman. My ex attacks you, and you’re still apologizing to me.”

“You do deserve an apology,” Emma said tiredly. “I hurt you but in a different way…”

“You didn’t hurt me,” Killian promised. “You were trying to protect yourself from being hurt, and I’ll be honest…if you told me last night, I would’ve had a meltdown.” He nudged his nose gently to hers before kissing her cheek. “But if it means that much…you’re forgiven, love. I’m just so happy you and the babe are safe.”

“How are the kids?” Emma asked weakly. “How did Alice get away?”

“She started screaming bloody murder when she saw it happen,” he explained, his fingers dancing gently across Emma’s skin with the utmost love and reverence, and maybe to reassure himself she was still there. “And the librarian knew you were her mother, rather than Eloise who tried to tell the police that her daughter was having a psychotic break.”

Emma sat up abruptly, torn between the desire to find her daughter and comfort her and find Eloise and just start swinging. Killian seemed to read her mind and gently placed his hand on her shoulder so she’d rest again.

 “So just to make sure…you’re okay with having a baby with me?” Emma asked.

“As if flowers mind the summer sun,” Killian replied tenderly.

“Well, technically too much sun tries up the flowers and—” He silenced her with a kiss that had her smiling against his lips. “Point taken.”

“Should we start thinking of names?”

But it was Alice and Henry who had named their little sister when she came into the world seven months later. They named her after the thing that they always got from being with one another: Hope.

[51kas81]

Twelve Dreams of Dr Sardonicus by Spirit

My parents were desperate for me to like classical music, but I just couldn’t buy into the length of the pieces. Then they played me Adagio for Strings by Samuel Barber and it was so beautiful, I cried. My school music teacher, Mr Vassal, asked for our favourite composers; I said Samuel Barber and he laughed at me. But eventually everyone caught up.

There was a Beatles versus Stones vibe at school. I was on the Beatles side. The first single I bought was Wild Thing by the Troggs and the first album was Bookends by Simon and Garfunkel. I loved Father and Son by Cat Stevens, because it made me think of me and my dad. My tastes weren’t shocking; they just needed to open up. Then, when I was 17, I went to hospital to have my tonsils out and my brother bought me some records and this mobile turntable in a suitcase.

Twelve Dreams of Dr Sardonicus by Spirit had the most amazing way of manipulating stereo. I was just blown away. I have to thank my brother; he turned me on to Joni Mitchell, Andy Pratt and Little Feat and opened up my boundaries.

Little Brother, Little Sister

My mother, Helen Shingler, was famous during my teens for playing Madame Maigret in a BBC series based on the Georges Simenon stories. My father, Seafield Head, was a producer and director at Verity Films, the documentary film company. Every year, a family friend’s mum would hire this huge barn and put on a play. I had a bit part in The Jackdaw of Rheims. The next year, I got to be the Emperor in The Emperor’s New Clothes. As I walked through the audience, all heads turned towards me and I remember thinking: “This is what I want to do for a living.”

I applied to the National Youth Theatre and the Central School of Speech and Drama, but I didn’t get in, so my father hired me as a runner and assistant editor. Working in the cutting rooms was fascinating. Then I enrolled at The Young Stagers at the Thorndike theatre in Leatherhead, run by this lovely woman called Joan MacAlpine. She directed me in an extraordinary piece called Little Brother, Little Sister, which got me into the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art. My teacher said: “If anybody can make me cry, I’ll take them to the theatre.” I did my piece again and made her cry.

The Rocky Horror Show

I remember being taken to The Rocky Horror Show on Kings Road when I was at drama school in my late teens. Tim Curry was playing Dr Frank-N-Furter – the role that he repeated in the film. Watching The Rocky Horror Show ignited something in my core. I knew I had acting in my blood because of my mother. Now I couldn’t wait to finish drama school and try to make it in the real world.

I finally got to play Dr Frank-N-Furter when The Rocky Horror Show came to the Piccadilly theatre in 1990. The exciting thing about acting is that you shouldn’t know what’s coming out of the actor’s mouth next – and I didn’t hold back. I just let whatever was going on inside of me come out in the character. That was life-changing for me as an actor. It made me realise that there’s nowhere that you can’t go.

Friends would come to see me perform and later say that they hardly recognised me, I was so out of character. As an actor, that’s a huge compliment.

Judi Dench

Judi Dench and Maurice Denham in 1966’s Talking to a Stranger. Photograph: Everett Collection/Alamy

One of Judi Dench’s early roles was this show on BBC Two called Talking to a Stranger, with Michael Bryant, Maurice Denham and Margery Mason. It’s about this family who are at odds with each other. Each of the four parts focuses on one family member’s view of what is going on around them. I thought it was beautiful, amazing and absolutely genius and I just fell in love with Judi. I thought that she was the most amazing actress – and still do. Judi taught me that acting can be at its best when it is very subtly underplayed. The core of believing an actor is buying into the fact that they’re not acting.

I got to play the rather unpleasant suitor of one of her on-screen daughters in Love in a Cold Climate on the BBC in the early 00s. I’m sure I must have said to Judi: ‘I think you’re so wonderful.’ Actors need appreciation and recognition. I suppose for me that will always be for Buffy, because Buffy was so different and so pivotal for its time. The episode called The Body, where Buffy’s mum dies, is the most extraordinary piece of writing and misdirection. I’m very grateful to have done so many evocative things that so many people have latched on to.

Paul Newman

Robert Redford and Paul Newman in 1969’s Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. Photograph: Photos 12/Alamy

I love Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. Each act is so brilliantly put together; it’s a stunning piece of writing. Both Robert Redford and Paul Newman are phenomenal, but Newman especially I’ve always loved, because he’s so believable that he instantly transports you into the story. I also loved Henry Fonda in Once Upon a Time in the West, in which he plays the baddie, which is unusual.

I often get cast as baddies. I don’t know why. I play Rupert Mannion on [the Apple TV+ sitcom] Ted Lasso. He’s a particularly unpleasant character and a complete narcissist, but you know where he’s coming from. To make somebody believable, you have to see their point of view. You don’t need to like them, but you have to be on board with what’s driving them.

I’m also in an episode of the new series of Back with David Mitchell and Robert Webb. I get to play a totally self-absorbed character called Charismatic Mike, who was great fun to play. It’s always been my theory that actors are hugely insecure, which is why we love dressing up and being someone else, because we don’t have to be in our own heads and bodies. Then we can express things that we may feel deep down and blame it on the character.

Lord of the Flies

At drama school, I really liked the people on the stage-managing course who were studying things like costume, lighting and prop-making. People used to say: you have to behave like a star to be thought of as a star. So, traditionally, a lot of actors take stage managers for granted.

I get very cross with actors who just throw their clothes on the floor. I said to one actor recently: “Costume are here before you, setting up your clothes, and they’re here after you’ve gone. Pick up your clothes, put them on a hanger in your cupboard. It’s not a big deal.” Teamwork is important.

At school, one of the books that blew me away was Lord of the Flies. It’s also about teamwork and not necessarily someone standing in front becoming the leader. In your teens, the world is yours to do what you want with. As you grow up, you realise you’re just part of something much bigger. Now more than ever, life should be about teamwork and for the cause of the greater good.

School’s Out Forever is available on digital from 15 February and DVD and Blu-ray from 12 April

[pr14nce15]

So quite a few things have changed since the massive blowout with the 1st lot of teens. They have all moved on with their lives and have grown into beautiful young people. Selena, Henry, Lori and Lorenzo have stayed together in the original apartment. Mackenzie, Jamie and Brody have moved into a new place in what used to be Jamie’s childhood home. And Rochelle who has shared with new roommate and best friend Miguel Perez. All of them have cut contact with Jasmine and Malachi as they were the reason why things were such a mess in the first place. As far as we know they have moved away from everyone and started their own fresh start.

For Prince, it was hard for him to move on to new things as he wasn’t ready to let go of his past. Encouragement and positivity was what he needed and with all of that with the support of his friends and family, he did just that. He moved in on his own and during the time he was dating around but things didn’t turn out well. But when his apartment block were expecting a new neighbour, just with Prince’s luck he would lay his eyes on the very glamorous and beautiful Sierra Simcox. They had a really good bond, not like the bond he had with Jasmine. It was a special type of bond. They have been together ever since and Prince is glad he has been able to find his princess.

Other things that have happened for the second Generation, None of us had seen this coming but, Brody has been working on his sexuality. He has always been unsure about it since him and Rochelle we’re together. But since he has broken up with her he has been exploring his options. He tried with other girls and it just didn’t feel right for him. So when he met Rochelle’s bestie Miguel, he felt weak to his knees, and there was no doubt about the attraction towards them both. But since their first encounter, they are both together but Brody did find it hard to come out to his parents. Bella could tell from the moment he said to them “I need to talk to you guys about a life changing thing” and if didn’t bother her in the slightest. As for Dylan, he is still trying to get used to the fact that his son is now gay and is dating a guy but he will understand properly. Eventually.

As for Gabrielle who was also caught in the heartbreak, continued to live her life without Malachi being in her life. She spent most of her time with her cousin Simone, who is literally her best friend, her ride or die and soulmate.

But like Prince you never knew what or who could be around the corner for her. Was we right? Absolutely. She ended up meeting new guy in school Jamal Thomas, who she is now happily with and is glad he’s the better one out of the two. But little did we know Jamal is related to someone or people we used to know quite well. Remember Bob Pancakes? Well this is his nephew. When Gabrielle told us we weren’t exactly happy about it as of what’s happened in the past with Bob but at the end of the day it’s about them and we have all grown to accept it. They are all happy and loved up together.

On the story of Bob Pancakes, we know he is back in town but he has definitely caused a stir with a family and thank god it’s not ours. It’s to do with The Morrison’s. Now I love Kayleigh to bits and she is one of my best friends but, she is very needy and desperate. Lately things with her and Curtis have been ok since having Aimee but the thing they are lacking is Intimacy. Curt is at the age of just wanting to live with life as a older adult and doesn’t seem sex is a big thing anymore. But Kayleigh is still feeling young and raring to go wild and be physically intimate doesn’t sit with them both right. But one thing that I explained to Kayleigh which I haven’t even told anyone yet is that, I ended up getting pregnant for the 3rd time but me and Ty already discussed we didn’t want any children so, as much as I didn’t want to do it, I ended up aborting the baby and I only told Kayleigh about. Of course Kayleigh told Curtis and said “it’s alright for some people who are still physically intimate but, you can’t even touch me anymore…” and then Curt got angry about it and then and that stemmed an argument that got really nasty. So Curt decided to move out to Jamie’s apartment for a couple of weeks till he felt ready to come back. Which just left Kayleigh and Aimee at home together. But of course Kayleigh just wants something, and that something was Bob Pancakes they met up during the day, she invited him back to hers and you all know how the day ends up. Little does Curt know that his wife is cheating on him.

On a more positive note, Other things have gone on. Marielle and Devonte got pregnant whilst on their honeymoon. They did have a few complications through the process but it’s got them where they need to be and that’s their twins and they named them Braylon and Tyson.

We didn’t hear much about Cecilia and Alex’s son but they named him Joseph. They are such a lovely little family and this picture reminded me of Bella and Mortimer when they were younger.

Well keeping it in the family, It’s been a while since we have updated about Cassandra and Branden. Well, they had kept it quite a long time after their wedding day to start thinking about having another baby but after so long, Cass got pregnant and they had a little girl called Faith and I just think The Bowlands are just the perfect family. Ayden was a little bit awkward about having a sibling at the start but he has grown used to it.

And another baby bombshell, All us oldies said we wouldn’t be having no more children now but for Gavin and Zoe, they felt they needed one more and they did. Little Harmony Richards completed their family.

And last but not least we have a new engagement, again keeping it in the family, Lorenzo ended up proposing to Lori and she said Yes. And I am so happy for them. They scream power couple to me especially after their makeovers. Congrats guys!!

Well that is just about it at the moment but there is definitely more to come for sure.

[capnjay21]

Brink 6/?

But this woman was neither mermaid nor Brave, radiant but fierce — and the cool touch of steel to his skin reminded him of the sword she had pointed at his throat.

“My name is Emma Swan,” she said, in answer to the question he had yet to give voice to, “and I’m here for my son.”

Season 2 Canon Divergence; Hook never escaped Neverland, and once the curse breaks Pan comes to collect the loneliest lost boy of them all - the one in possession of the Heart of the Truest Believer.

one | two | three | four | five | ao3

A/N: and here is chapter six! this one goes out to @carpedzem​ because she is amazing and sweet and lovely and has been INCREDIBLY patient in me getting this out :D a fair warning to all - Hook gets a little dark in this chapter, but bear with him. as we all know, he’s turning it around!  Rating: T 

my teeny tiny lovely taglist: @carpedzem​ @superchocovian​ @optomisticgirl​ @phiralovesloki​

If anyone else wants to be tagged with updates for this fic (which could be helpful, given how sporadically I drop them I’M SO SORRY) then just let me know!

***

It was a simple enough plan; the difficulty had been in laying it in near total silence, so as not to alert the boys sitting at camp of any unusual rustling nearby. One of the nets Starkey often used for hunting was easily, conveniently, wide enough to cover the form of a boy – and given the look he and Hook had shared one he’d given the thought a voice, Emma chose not to think too closely about what its previous uses might have included. The idea was to tie it aloft in the dark canopy, then lure one of the boys away from the camp and trap him underneath it. All, ideally, without him alerting the others to his predicament.

Her heart hammered against her ribcage at a steady pace, a symptom of the near constant state of anxiety she had been in since Henry had walked out of her arms and disappeared back into the trees, but adrenaline coursed through her with a nervous energy. The bravado of her intent aside, it didn’t change the fact that she was gearing up to kidnap a child.

Even after everything Hook had told her about the Lost Boys, and after meeting Pan himself, it was difficult to see them as anything except that – boys. If monsters were all they were, surely Henry would not have believed he could make a home with them. She trusted his judgement above all else. It didn’t sit well in her gut, but there wasn’t much she could do about it now.

The trap was just about set. At the side of the clearing stood Hook (no, Killian – damn, it was hard to try and disassociate) readying himself to creep as close to the camp as he dared, before figuring out a way to split one of them away from the pack. Emma was just searching for her own hiding place, when their plans were entirely derailed.

Out of the undergrowth stumbled a boy, a head or so larger than Henry, staring at his shoes as he went, clearly not paying any attention to where he was going. Starkey and Noodler immediately darted into the brush, and Hook gesticulated wildly for Emma to do the same, but she reacted a second too slowly.

The boy looked up, clapping eyes on her instantly. He froze where he stood, his eyes growing wide as saucers, lips parting in confusion. He was thin and lanky, in the way that boys in the early teens often were, and an angry, scarlet scar had been drawn across his right cheek – and it looked like it was still fresh. As he stared, Emma stared right back, frantically wracking her brains for a way out. She couldn’t spare a glance at Hook or his men without giving away their position, but one cry from this boy would draw the entire hoard towards them. Emma made to grab for her sword, but something stopped her.

He didn’t seem – well, he certainly didn’t look threatening. If anything he appeared fascinated by her, blinking as if he were sure in a split second she might vanish from sight. He took a halting step toward her—

There was a heavy thunk, and he collapsed down into the dirt. Hook stood over his motionless form, brandishing the hilt of his cutlass aloft.

Once Emma recovered from the shock, she gaped. “What the hell are you playing at?” She felt an urgent sort of indignance at the bump she was sure would begin to form on the back of the boy’s head.

Hook (shoot, Killian) merely arched an eyebrow.

“Did you want the boy or not?”

Starkey quickly set about dismantling the trap while Noodler hauled the boy over his shoulder, and their troupe scarpered before their good fortune had the chance to change its mind.

Hook led them a few miles east at a punishing pace, wanting to put as much distance between them and the Lost Boys’ camp as possible. It wouldn’t do them any good to begin questioning the boy somewhere near enough to the rest of his number to allow them a rescue of some kind – although Hook assured her that without Pan’s direction, they almost certainly couldn’t coordinate well enough to pull off such an attempt. Given Pan’s penchant for omnipotence, Emma didn’t find that exactly reassuring.

Pan was connected to every living thing on the island, or so Hook had told her, and it wasn’t hard to believe. She had felt… something, from the moment she got here. It yearned for his touch, breathed for his blessing; they were the trespassers here. Even the trees themselves appeared bent towards each other, the rustle of leaves now the harshest of whispers eager to give them away.

Shit, she had been on this island way too long. She was starting to sound like H—Killian.

Killian. Killian Jones.

She just couldn’t see it.

They settled in a small clearing, tying the still unconscious boy tightly to a tree so his head lolled down onto his chest. There was little else to do except wait for him to come to, but even those few moments of stillness began to make Emma restless. It was the first move on the offensive she had made since she arrived on the island – but it was about time she stopped reacting and started acting.

At their captain’s instruction, Starkey and Noodler disappeared into the undergrowth, panning out in different directions, just to make sure they hadn’t either been followed or accidentally stopped a little too close to something far worse.

“So,” Hook mused, shirking off his duster and folding it carefully atop a rock. At this time of day the heat was at its most oppressive, and Emma could spot the sweat glistening from his brow. She herself was doing her best to stop her hair from sticking to the back of her neck. “Now you have a Lost Boy. What exactly are you planning to do next?”

Truthfully, Emma hadn’t exactly thought this far ahead. She had a vague idea of what she wanted from this, but the means hadn’t come to her as quickly as she’d hoped they would. To be perfectly honest, she was surprised to not have met with any resistance from Hook before now.

She let out a long breath, and decided to be honest. They’d agreed to trust each other, hadn’t they?

“I don’t know,” she admitted. “Get him to talk? Take us to Henry, maybe?”

Hook – Killian – did not look convinced. “Sooner the sun would rise in the west, I expect.”

“I can be persuasive.”

He gave her an appraising look, one that lasted a beat too long and, if she wasn’t mistaken, lingered rather indelicately on some of her assets she knew men found particularly persuasive. She only realised the incidental dual meaning in her statement a few seconds too late.

To her surprise, he didn’t take the bait.

To her greater surprise, that almost irked her a little.

“I’m sure you can,” he continued brusquely, turning to glare at their captive against the tree. “But these aren’t ordinary boys.”

Emma followed his gaze. For a split second, she thought of the boy’s wide eyes as he took her in for the first time. He’d seemed almost – curious.

“He doesn’t have to be our enemy,” Emma pointed out. “Pan’s a monster, right? And he’s still a kid. Maybe he’s been waiting for an opportunity like this.”

Hook eyed her closely, tilting his head to one side.

“You hesitated.”

Emma blinked. “What?”

“Before, when the boy came across us. You went for your sword but you hesitated.” He peered at her carefully. “Why?”

Her lips parted – had she? She didn’t really remember, it had all happened so fast. He’d tumbled out of the brush almost right in front of her, freezing in place once he saw her. All she could really recall was thinking how – just how –

How young he looked.

How nothing like she’d imagined a Lost Boy would look up close, after everything Hook and his crew had told her. He was just a kid.

And she’d been a kid like that, once.

She was spared from fumbling through a response first by a loud sniff, and then a groan from the opposite side of the clearing. Both she and Hook immediately turned to look at their captive, the boy beginning to stir against his bindings.

“He’s coming to.”

“Alright, just leave this to me,” Emma said, injecting far more confidence into her tone that she felt. Gripping the hilt of David’s longsword, but keeping it in its sheath, she started in the direction of the boy.  

“I’d never have pegged you for such an optimist,” Hook muttered, but kept his distance all the same. Emma chose to ignore him. Seeing as the pirates and the Lost Boys were apparently brutal enemies, it was probably for the best that he stayed out of the way.

The boy lifted his head, blinking blearily against the light and made to move his shoulders, before realising with alarm that they were trapped at his side by the rope. He immediately began to struggle, attempting to rip himself free but the knots held fast – then his gaze shot up to his surroundings. His wide eyes flickered first to Hook, then Emma, and his expression crumpled in fear.

“H—help!” he hollered, perhaps hoping to draw the attention of any nearby allies, “Help me, help! Peter!”

“Hey, chill out!” Emma hissed.

“Help, anyone – they’ve got me, I’m here!”

Trying to think of something to shut him up, Emma reached for the buckle of her scabbard and scrambled to take it off. Once she held the sword in her hand, certain she had his attention, she dropped it onto the ground and lifted her arms in an open gesture. Perhaps if he didn’t think of her as a threat, she could at least get him to stop crying out. The last thing they wanted was to draw any additional unwanted attention.

“Look – I’m not armed. Just calm down, alright?”

It had something of the desired effect, and he momentarily stopped struggling to survey her warily.

“I’m sorry about that bump on your head too, that’s gotta kill. What’s your name?” The boy’s lips tightened, as if he were reluctant to talk to her. “I’m Emma.”

“Are you a pirate?”

The boy’s gaze flickered down to the sword lying on the ground, so Emma nudged it a little farther away with her boot.

“No, I’m not a pirate. I’m just looking for my son.”

“Your – your son?” The boy’s mouth dropped open, agape. “You’re a mother?”

Given everybody had one, Emma was beginning to find this fascination that mothers could exist from the inhabitants of Neverland pretty damn irritating.

“Yeah, I am. I’m Henry’s mom. Henry?” Recognition flashed in the boys eyes, but he quickly tried to suppress it, schooling his features into something a little more neutral. Emma didn’t buy it for a second. “You know him, right? Can’t be that many new kids on the island.”

The boy kept his lips pressed together in a thin line.

“You’ve got a terrible poker face, kid,” Emma pointed out, “so you might as well just tell me. Where is Pan keeping him?”

“Pan doesn’t keep any of us,” the boy spat. “We want to stay. We want to be here.” With a force Emma would not have attributed to him, he suddenly lunged as far forward as he could, the rope tightening and groaning in protest. “And when I get out of this I’ll make sure you know why.”  

“Look, I’m not your enemy.”

“Oh no?” The boy’s eyes were wide, his lips trembling as his pupils darted back and forth between her and Hook. “Then what’s he doing here?”

Clearly referring to Hook, Emma spared him a glance. His mouth was set in a grim line and he stood a little straighter, shoulders squared. For a moment she considered sending him away, if only for a few minutes so she could get this boy onside – the bad blood between the pirates on the Lost Boys was clearly very, very mutual. After a beat she dismissed the idea. She had nothing to be ashamed of, especially not working with Hook. He was putting himself more at risk with every moment he spent helping her. He’d given her weapons, food, allies; and she wasn’t even sure if he’d be able to see what she had promised him in return, let alone use it.

She was the dishonest one here, not Hook.

“Hook is my –” She stumbled on the word. Would ally alienate this boy completely? In her moment of hesitation, Hook’s eyebrows shot to his hairline. “He’s helping me. And so will you, if you know what’s good for you.”

The boy threw back his head and howled – fully, howled – with laughter.

“And why the hell would I do that?” he wheezed out between breaths, but his jovial demeanour was not enough to make her forget just how much the boy was straining against his bonds. His wrists were turning white with the effort. Emma had always heard talk about the strength of a sailor’s knot, and she hoped it would hold up here against the brat stood before her.

“You want to be on the right side of this when it all goes down,” she said, far sharper than she had been intending to be with him.

The whole point of this, her entire angle was that he was just a kid – and she couldn’t believe that a kid was capable of all the wrongdoing Hook had laid at their feet without a shred of remorse, without even the smallest desire for things to be different. She would know. She was a kid like that, once. And her lonely heart had yearned for a better life, even as she convinced herself it would never be possible.

But then Henry had found her. And now she was determined to grab that life by two hands, and fight to get it back.

“And, look – I know you must have had a family once, and maybe one day you stopped believing you could get back to them. But I’m here, I’m here for Henry but I can help you too. All of you. I can help you get home – if you help me get my son back.”

Even before she’d finished speaking the boy was shaking his head, lips curled in disbelief. Emma tried not to let her heart sink at the vehemence with which he immediately rejected the idea out of hand.

“Don’t you get it?” he spat. “I’m here because I don’t want to go home. None of us do.”

Emma let out a noise of frustration. “But Pan’s a sadist – just look at what he did to you.” She gestured vaguely at the scarlet scratch underneath his right eye.

The boy’s expression lit up with a savage delight, and Emma had to force herself not to take a wary step back.

“Oh, Pan didn’t do this. Henry did.”

***

“Oh, Pan didn’t do this. Henry did.”

Emma didn’t move a muscle. Even from where he stood a few paces away, Hook could practically see the cogs whirring behind the jade of her eyes – weighing up the odds of truth against a lie, that her boy had been the one to scar the Lost One in front of them.

Hook would put his wager on truth. Pan didn’t lure them onto the island to stay nice little boys, and he’d yet to meet one that wouldn’t immediately stab one of his comrades if he thought it might elevate himself in the eyes of their leader. That was why only the nastiest, the most vicious, took their places close to Pan. Felix, Rufio – they had bloodied their hands more times than he could count with not just his men, but those within their own ranks as well. And there was no doubt about it; this Henry was a special favourite to Pan, no matter how little time he had spent in Neverland.

But then, he didn’t know the lad. Emma seemed perpetually convinced of his innocence, of his goodness. Perhaps he couldn’t be so easily persuaded. After all, there had once been another boy who had resisted Pan’s influence.

Well, most children think they’ve found paradise when they lay their eyes on Neverland’s magic. Why else leave home in the first place?

I came so a family I loved could live.

The memory rose, unbidden, from the crust of his weary heart. For the first time, he realised the startling parallels between when he had first met Baelfire, and Emma and Henry’s brief but devastating reunion those days ago.

I have to give you your best chance.

Perhaps there was a chance her lad was made of sturdier stuff – the courage that had carried Baelfire, too.

“You’re lying.”

Emma’s rebuttal cut sharply across his musings. She still hadn’t moved an inch, but he spotted the hand clenched into a fist at her side, the stiffness of her jaw. It wasn’t exactly news to him that she couldn’t always maintain a tight lid on her temper, and Hook was wary of the results it might wrought.

“I don’t need to!” the boy laughed maniacally, clearly delighting in the effect his words were having on her. “He’s a Lost Boy now, he’s one of us! Henry is one of the most vicious recruits we’ve had in ages!”

He spotted Emma flinch, with every word so carelessly flung at her causing more damage than the last, and a swell of anger began to rise in Hook’s chest. The brat probably was lying, just because Emma was giving him everything he wanted. She was playing right into his hands, was allowing herself to get smaller and smaller as the boy’s arrogance and amusement grew, and he couldn’t believe – frankly, he was irritated – that she was giving up on her lad so fast. That she was so quick to believe the drivel this boy was spewing.

In the wake of the inerrable faith he had endured from her for days, he wanted to shake her by the shoulders and tell her no, her Henry was better than that, he had to be. It was ridiculous to believe anything to the contrary.

It couldn’t all be for nothing. It just couldn’t. Not after she’d come so far.

And then the boy spat in her face.

The movement was sudden, unexpected, like a snake suddenly recoiling and striking harshly, and Emma stumbled back in surprise.

It only took a second for her to recover.

Letting out a strangled cry, she flung herself at the boy who, for all his straining against his bonds a moment earlier, was now shrinking back into the tree trunk attempting to get away from her. Hook was at her side in a flash, his right arm around her waist hauling her back from doing any real damage.

Emma struggled against him, sharp nails and fury, but Hook held fast.

“Stop! Swan, stop.”

“What are you doing?” she spat, but he was asking himself the same question.

Why did it matter to him if Emma hurt the boy? He cared not a whit for him. It was her stupid idea in the first place to take one as a hostage when he’d much rather gut them for all the injury they had caused him and his crew. He’d been acting purely on instinct when he lunged for her, but for some reason – for all he’d like to see that boy with his eyes gauged out, the idea of Emma Swan doing the gauging was just – it was just –

You went for your sword but you hesitated. Why?

Hook already knew the answer to that.

And, he realised, he couldn’t bear to see her forget it. Not like he had.

“Let me talk to him,” Hook said harshly, after feeling her slow against him. He loosened his arm. “Let me do it.”

Please, let me. Let me do it. I couldn’t bear it if you did it.

Emma stopped struggling, breathing heavily as her eyes met his head on. “Do…  what?”

He could tell from her hollow tone. She already knew.

He was a survivor. This was how he had survived.

He could feel Emma’s eyes on him, but he pushed her from his mind. She was nothing to him, and no one. He thrust it all into quiet, all thoughts of her, of Henry, of Bae.

Calmly, but with the familiar ache of old bones, he touched every angry part of him, every dark night or hallowed breath, every ugly thought or thoughtless act; he let it all flood his senses until there was nothing else left. When the alternative was to feel helpless, he chose this, he always had, and he probably always would. He would rather be darkness, he would rather be the fury that roiled within him, the Neverbird’s mournful wail and the storm at the centre of the harsh sun above. He was Milah’s dying gasp and Rumplestiltskin’s hoarse cackle. Pan’s sinister fury. Silver’s blithely tossed coin and Brennan’s promise of courage before the last light went out.

He was all of it and he was nothing pure.

This boy was not a boy. He was a Lost One. And he had just spat in Emma’s face.

“What’s your name, boy?”

His approach was slow, delicate. His boots crunched on dead leaves underfoot. All the bravado the boy had boasted evaporated in the space of a few seconds, and he tried to make himself as small as possible. The trunk at his back prevented him from shrinking any further, and his gaze dropped fearfully to the hook that swung dangerously at his side.

“N – Nibs.”

Stupid fucking name for a boy.

“Nibs?” The boy nodded quickly, huffing out a panicked breath. “Now tell me, Nibs, do you remember Rufio?”

Rufio had been the cruellest. Rufio had split his crew apart in a raid in the dead of night, had sent an arrow through Jukes’ throat, had carved his name into Bones’ shoulder with his teeth. After Noodler had grabbed him from behind, Rufio had sheared off his hands and laughed while he did so, a terrible and piercing thing. Hook hadn’t heard worse from men twice his age.

“Do you remember what I did to Rufio? No?” The boy didn’t move, only kept his eyes fixed squarely on Hook as he reached him, trying almost desperately not to breathe. “Well, let me take the opportunity to remind you. You see this hook?” To illustrate the point, Hook lifted it to Nibs’ cheek, letting the round curve of the tip brush against the boy’s cheek, who flinched as its cool touch made contact. “I shook his hand with it.”

He brought it down the side of his face, letting the sharp point linger on his neck.

“And then I plunged it into his gut and ripped him open until his eyes wept tears of crimson.”

Rufio had screamed, and Pan had ended the game there – had called the first truce. Had grudgingly accepted the losses on both sides to be fair, but not before he had hauled Noodler, weeping from his place on the ground, and reattached his hands while the man screeched in agony. It was a warning, for them both. Pan had never let his boredom run away from him again, nor had he tried to provoke Hook in such a way since.

Nibs’ breathing had turned heavy, and scared.

“The lady would like to know where her son is. I intend for her to discover it. Now,” Hook reached his hand into the boy’s hair and squeezed tightly. Nibs gasped loudly. “Think carefully before you answer; how helpful would you like to be?”

Nibs kept his eyes shut as he gaped through an answer.

“I – I can’t.”

Hook pulled a little tighter. “That is not a helpful answer.”

“I don’t know!”

“Hook.” Emma’s voice drifted distantly from behind him, but he ignored her.

“I don’t believe you,” he hissed.

The boy babbled quietly between whimpers. “It doesn’t… it doesn’t…”

“Speak clearly.”

“It d-doesn’t matter,” Nibs whimpered, “it doesn’t matter w-what you promise, or what you c-could do to me…” His eyes finally opened, and Hook could see them shining with unshed tears. “It’s n-nothing compared to – to what He w-would do to me, if – if I –”

“Hook, stop. Stop!”

He didn’t realise when she had approached, but both of Emma’s hands were suddenly on his right arm, one at his elbow and the other wrenching his hand free from the back of the boy’s head. In surprise, he let go – and then realised her face was coloured a deep scarlet, and she was trembling. Nibs sobbed with relief.

“He’s just a kid!” she cried, and the wave of Hook’s fury crested into indignation.

She had let him do this. Had wanted to do it herself, in fact, and would have if he hadn’t bloody stopped her. Only now was she remembering her saintly act, wanting to hurl some holier-than-thous about the true meaning of innocence when she didn’t know a damn thing about it. Emma Swan had been in Neverland for a matter of days. Hook had lived there for over two-hundred years. It had taken so much more from him than her, and he had never let himself be ashamed of the measures he took for survival.

But one glance from her was like shining a light on all its ugliness.

Hook quailed under that kind of exposure.  

“Do you want your son back, or don’t you?”

“I –”

“This, Swan – this is the only language they understand!” he thundered, and he couldn’t work out why he was so angry with her. But he was. He was vibrating with fury.

For Noodler, for Bones, for Jukes, for Mullins and Kits and Carter and Clyde, for Skylights. For Baelfire.

For Liam.

“I am tired of watching you flail about aimlessly, making this up as you go along – either you buck up and realise what needs to be done or you can forget about saving your boy!”

Hook wrenched his arm free from her grip, and started walking.

He didn’t care which direction, he didn’t care how far. He hated the island, hated the trees and the mist and the dirt and the magic, even the sea – he hated all of it.

Bust most of all, he hated the way Emma Swan was looking at him.  

***

The sun had long since dipped below the treeline by the time Emma acknowledged this might have all been for nothing. The early evening was rapidly approaching, and they were no closer to getting any answers out of Nibs at all. In fact, after Hook’s outburst, he had completely clammed up and refused to speak a word to her no matter how she tried to cajole him. She was starting to consider whether it might be worth just letting him go. They were losing light, and time, not to mention Hook was being no help whatsoever.

He had stormed out into the forest for a while, but he’d had enough of a head on his shoulders not to go far, and once he had returned he had focused his attention on reviewing their supplies and checking the perimeter. Once that was done, he had sat down against a large rock at the centre of the clearing, and had taken to tossing stones out into the brush.

It was almost childish, a behaviour which Emma found particularly difficult to marry up to what she had seen earlier.

I plunged it into his gut and ripped him open until his eyes wept tears of crimson.

Had he really done that? To a boy?

He’d warned her that he wasn’t a good man – often enough, in fact. And the way he spoke about the Lost Boys suggested blood had probably been spilled on both sides. It was a conflict she knew nothing about, that had been going on for longer than she’d been alive, probably. She’d told Hook that she wanted to start trusting him, and she believed him when he told her the Lost Boys were dangerous. The way that kid had talked about Henry – it made her fucking blood boil, and without Hook she was sure she would’ve ripped Nibs a new one and not felt a twinge of remorse. She’d even been prepared to let Hook wrest the information she wanted out of him by any means necessary.

But when Hook had his fist clenched in that boy’s hair, she just couldn’t stop imagining it was Henry instead.

These kids weren’t responsible for the way Pan had twisted them all up into knots, were they? And he had already started doing it to Henry.

Mom, I’m going to save magic.

She couldn’t let herself believe that the only way to get out of all this was to resort to torturing kids, not least because her son might never forgive her for it. He wanted her to be good. It had just taken one trembling boy that reminded her too much of Henry for her to remember that. Still, she was disappointed it had driven an even greater wedge between her and Hook.

He sat with his back to her, and flung another stone out into the undergrowth. With a thwack it hit its mark, whatever Hook had been intending to throw it at, and his hand rummaged around in the grass for another one.

Emma decided it was completely ridiculous that they were sat apart, stewing like two kids who had gotten into a fight at recess. He hadn’t just straight up and left her, no matter how tired he claimed to be of her, and that had to mean something. So it was about time they talked.

Leaving Nibs to be watched over by Starkey, Emma crossed the clearing until she stood beside him. From the way his shoulders tensed, she knew he could tell she was there.

“So,” she started, scuffing her boot in the dirt. “You kinda lost it a bit there.”

“I’m not going to apologise if that’s what you’re after.”

Emma resisted the urge to roll her eyes. “Please, I’m not in eighth grade. I’m not going to fall apart because you raised your voice.”

Although, come to think of it, it was perhaps the first time she had heard him do so.

Hook finally turned, angling his body so he could look over his shoulder to where Nibs was standing, eyes downcast and motionless. “Is he talking?”

“Hasn’t said a word.” With a sigh, Emma dropped down onto the ground in front of him, so she could still see the boy in her line of sight. “Whatever Pan’s threatened him with, he must be terrified.”

Hook grunted in agreement, before turning his attention to his hook. Over and over, he ran the forefinger of his right hand across its curve, and it gleamed dangerously even this late in the day. Emma had never really thought much on it until now, but he must be able to cause a great deal of damage with it, and although she had witnessed quite a few practical uses for it over the last few days when it came to putting up camp or starting fires, its primary function still had to be as a weapon.

In the stories she’d heard as a child it was almost a comedic device – the character’s name was Captain Hook, so of course he had a hook for a hand. There was no point thinking anymore about it.

Except he had told her his name was Killian Jones.

“Why’d you pick a hook?”

The question was out of her mouth before she’d really had a chance to think about it. Killian’s eyes shot up to meet hers, looking perplexed so she hastened to continue.

“If there’s anything I’ve learnt so far, it’s that all these fairy tales… they started off as ordinary people.” Before anything else, Mary Margaret Blanchard had been a person to Emma, who breathed and cried and made mistakes, just like her. In the end, all Regina Mills had really wanted to be was Henry’s mother, no matter how grotesque the way she chose to go about it. “The Evil Queen, Captain Hook… you said your name was Killian Jones.”

Hook clicked his tongue. He looked as if regretted telling her already. “I haven’t been Killian Jones in a long time.”

“Well, you told me that was your actual name, so it’s more recent than you think,” she pointed out drily. Otherwise why would he have bothered mentioning it? “And I’m asking him. Of all the things, after you lost your hand – why a hook? And not a… I don’t know, a fake hand. Or a dagger.” He lived in a world with magic for God’s sake – maybe he could’ve grown it back?

He looked as if he wouldn’t answer her, and for a long time he was silent. His stare merely drilled a hole into the ground between them, and not for the first time Emma wondered what it really was he was thinking about. Then, after a long moment, his lips parted.

“The Dark One, he…” He gritted his teeth, like it was hard to get the words out. “It was the first thing I had to hand. A hook. I was desperate, I stuck it into his chest – right where his heart should be. And he laughed.” Hook scowled, his expression dark and furious. “I never wanted to forget that feeling. How helpless, how weak I was. I was so small next to him. I wanted to pierce his skin one more time with that hook, but for it to make him bleed – to show him I’d never be that weak again.” He raised his eyes skyward, letting out a long breath. “It’s a reminder – and my penance. The price of true strength.”

“Violence isn’t strength.”

Hook finally looked at her, arching an eyebrow. “Isn’t it?”

Perhaps if he’d asked her a year ago she might have agreed. Back then, strength felt like putting on her red leather jacket and punching back at the world. Emma couldn’t speak for the hook, but the way he talked about it made it sound like his own armour.

“Believe me, I used to think the way you do,” she began. A lifetime ago. Before Storybrooke. “I thought I was strong. Then Henry found me and I learnt – I learnt what real strength is. It’s perseverance, it’s belief. It’s seeing the best in people even when it’s hard. And I couldn’t just give up, revert back to my old habits, not after he’d given me this second chance, you know?”

She’d given up on Henry once, before she’d even held him; but he had never, never given up on her.

“He wanted better for me and he kept believing, kept telling me to open my eyes and take it no matter how many times I told him I didn’t want it anymore, that I didn’t need it.”

When you went through the wardrobe you appeared on the side of the street. Your parents were trying to save you from the curse!

Sure they were, kid.

To her surprise, she felt a familiar sting behind her nose and her face began to flush, so she tried to hurry through the rest of what she was stumbling out as quickly as possible. Thinking about Henry like this – it made him feel so close, even though she knew he was so far away.

She laughed bitterly. “He’s still doing it now. Hell, he actually wants to live in a place like this because it’s what he truly believes will make me happiest. That,” she finished emphatically, “is strength.”

Just in case the sudden tide of emotion gave her away, she resolutely did not look at Hook even though she could feel his stare on the side of her face, instead choosing to pick up a stick and stab lines into the dirt. Perhaps he was trying to discern if she was speaking any word of a lie, or perhaps he was about to laugh in her face. It didn’t matter, she didn’t care. She just didn’t want this strangeness between them anymore. Even if he was furious, even if he was scared – if he hated the Lost Boys it was fine, she wasn’t there to judge him. She didn’t want him to think she was ashamed to be near him.

He was just there to help her get Henry back. That was the most important thing of all.

Finally, he looked away.

“I can’t remember how that feels,” he admitted quietly. “To want to – for another person, I mean.”

And all of a sudden, something became startlingly clear to her. So much so, that she was almost annoyed she hadn’t realised it before.

“Gold took more than your hand from you, didn’t he?”

Hook met her gaze, and Emma was struck by just how wretched he looked. It was perhaps the most open she had ever seen his expression, his every thought was written into the downward curve of his mouth, his eyes wide and sorrowful. Of course. Of course Gold had taken something far more valuable. It should have been enough just knowing the kind of man Gold was to realise that.

Now, she decided. Right this second. Without the bravado, without the careless grin. None of the performance he put on from the start of the day. Now he looked more like a Killian Jones.

He stood abruptly, surprising her. Three paces away his duster sat on the rock where he had placed it when they arrived, and he began rummaging through the pockets. For a moment, Emma’s memory flashed back to the drawing she had found tucked carefully between two books in his cabin, and she was sure he was about to pull it out and show her exactly what Gold had taken from him.

Killian did pull out a piece of parchment, but it was one far more familiar than the one she had been thinking of. After he walked back over, this time he perched atop the rock he had been leaning against, and let the parchment fall to the ground between them. Dust and blades of grass blew outwards from where it landed, and Emma felt a spike of irritation rise at the sight of it.

It was Pan’s map.

“What are you doing with that?” She’d left it behind for a reason.

“This is how you’ll find your son,” Killian insisted, pointing firmly at the map. “Not that.” He didn’t need to tilt his head in the direction of Nibs tied to the tree, but his meaning was implicit. “Think about what you just told me. You’re already making progress.”

Emma scowled. “I told you, I don’t want to play Pan’s game.”

“Why not? Henry is.” At Emma’s shocked expression, he barrelled on. “I believe he did scar that boy’s cheek, and what’s more I believe he did it with a longsword.”

Henry is one of the most vicious new recruits we’ve had in ages!

“Stop it.”

“You said it yourself, he’s building a life here. And what is that, really? A scratch?” Killian shook his head. “It’s nothing at all. I’ve seen an alley cat deliver worse. He is doing the minimum of what’s required while he finds his feet here, spilling a little blood so he doesn’t have to spill more.” Either way, Emma did not like the direction of his thoughts, and if Killian sensed her pending denial then he became more emphatic to combat it. “You must realise it. Pan controls everything on this island – what he asks for, he has to receive. And until you acknowledge that you are beyond even my help.”

She didn’t want to. She avoided Killian’s gaze because she knew it would ruin her resolve to not think of things so helplessly. It didn’t seem smart to start playing a game while simultaneously accepting that the result had already been decided – to her mind, it was probably why nothing had changed in Neverland for however many centuries. If Pan controlled everything and everyone then there was no way she could win this. She was as ineffective as a gnat against his skin, and she may as well be one of the gaunt mothers they had seen turning the corners of the Maze of Regrets, wishing and crying out, never to realise they were trapped in a place that never changed, that never could change.

The pirates, the Lost Boys, Tiger Lily and the native tribe. They were all just chasing each other round and round the clock, waiting for the gears to run down but knowing they never would. It was violent and infinite and fuck she just wanted the temperature to cool down for just a second so she could think.

Only she was the rogue element here. Which just proved…

“He doesn’t control everything on the island,” she realised. Pan couldn’t control her, but he could control Henry, making him come to her and beg her to leave him behind. He also gave her that map because he wanted it to show her something painful. “Sometimes he can only control what you see.”

Pan wanted to get rid of her, that much was abundantly clear – and that meant she had to represent something more.

“What are you talking about?” Killian asked, likely exasperated that she was ignoring his advice once again.

“The Maze,” Emma was rushing the words out, her heart beginning to thump rapidly against her ribcage as her excitement grew. “They’re mothers, you said, looking for their kids. You said they’re left there because the boys don’t want to go to them, but what if that’s not it all? What if they don’t know?”

Killian’s eyebrows knitted together. “What’re you getting at?” She stood, unable to sit there waiting for a second longer. “Swan?”

Emma turned to stare at Nibs, still staring at his boots and scuffing them in the dirt.

“I’m going to give him what every lost kid wants,” she said firmly, beginning to march over to him. “A mother.”

Nibs instinctively looked up when she approached, but quickly lowered his eyes, such had been the standard since Killian’s outburst a little while ago. The boy had been determined to stay silent, perhaps hoping they would deem him worthless enough to merit just letting go. Emma was determined to not let it all go to waste.

“Nibs,” she said blithely, “that’s a funny name. You had it all your life?” As expected, the boy did not reply. “Don’t suppose it’s short for anything… like Nabil?”

She’d heard it at the Maze – every sound that had come from there, every pained cry and plea, had remained etched into her memory afterwards. It was good, she’d decided. Good to have a reminder of what she was working for, and what she might become if she gave up. She was going out on a limb here, praying for a miracle and that there was some connection between a name she had heard scattered on the wind, and the little lost boy in front of her.

From the way he looked up at her, gaping with wide eyes, she felt she might’ve hit her mark.

“Wh – where did you hear that?” he asked hoarsely.

Triumphant, Emma smiled. “From your Mom.”

“My… mother?”

“That’s right.”

“I don’t understand.”

Emma tried to think of the best way to convey what she knew. She cast her mind back to Starkey’s maps of Neverland. “You ever seen that big structure, the one at the mouth of the river that comes down from the mountain? The pirates call it Misery Bay.”

Only later had she realised why.

Nibs’ eyes flickered fearfully. His tongue darted out to his dry lips. “We… we don’t go there. That’s where the witches are.”

“Witches?”

“Witches,” he affirmed. “They eat children. At night they cry, thinking about all the meals they can never have. Peter traps them in the Maze of Witches so they’ll never catch us.”

It was such a bald-faced lie that it made Emma furious. Those mothers could have been there for centuries, trapped, and all along their sons had never known that they were there – had in fact been afraid of their grief, as it were a weapon that would cause them harm. Every day the boys got a little more lost, and the mothers lost a little more hope that they would ever find their wayward children; and through it all Pan watched, and laughed, and let everyone around him fall into even greater misery.

“You’re wrong,” she replied gently, “they’re mothers, Nibs. Pan doesn’t want you to know, but moms come back for their kids all the time – I’m just the latest in a long line.” Somehow she’d escaped the Maze’s magic, and although she had no idea why she was grateful. “He wants you to stay lost so you can be soldiers in his war.”

The struggle Nibs was facing in digesting what she was telling him was written all across his features, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. The scarlet scar under his cheek appeared to wink up at her, whispering Henry in a way that made her feel queasy.

“Peter, he… wouldn’t.”

It wasn’t easy to start doubting the person you believed in most – she had enough experience of that.

“I’m here for my son. I love him so much, I want to take him home. But Pan wants him to forget all about me.” Even giving the errant thought a voice was frightening. “Your Mom’s in that maze, Nibs. I’m sure of it.”

“Not – not my mother,” Nibs frowned. “She… she was only ever interested in money. She wouldn’t come for me.”

“Sometimes we need to lose what’s most important to us before we realise how much we treasure it. I won’t leave Henry again.”

Determined, Emma circled the tree and began tugging at the knots that kept the boy in place. Starkey let out a noise of alarm, and she could hear Killian scrambling to his feet and reaching for his cutlass in the background.

Even Nibs seemed startled at the development. “What are you doing?”

“I’m letting you go,” she muttered, huffing at the effort of tugging the rope free. Damn those sailor knots and how goddamn tight they were. “Now you can either go back to Pan, tell him where we are and get us killed, or you can go to that maze and find your Mom.”

The last knot loosened and Nibs sprang forward, wincing and rubbing at his wrists. With more than a little guilt, Emma noticed the angry red lines circling them from where he had pulled at the bonds. It only strengthened her resolve, even as the boy stared at her warily. It looked like he didn’t quite believe he was really being released. Killian was the one who had said it – only Lost Boys could enter the Maze. It stood to reason that Nibs would be able to get in there and confirm what she had said for himself.

“Find your Mom,” Emma repeated, “then come back here and help me get Henry back too.”

Please, she begged silently, please, help us.

The boy looked first at her, then over his shoulder where Killian stood, hand poised and ready on his cutlass. Then Nibs stared back at her, expression completely neutral, before he tore off into the forest without a word.

No sooner had his shadow touched the treeline before the boy vanished from sight. Emma couldn’t even hear him moving through the undergrowth, as if he were a ghost or had taken to the air – maybe this was the gift of the true inhabitants of Neverland. They knew how to bend the forest around them like an old friend, they didn’t have to fight against it the way she did.

Dusk kissed the trees now, and the light was rapidly fading. What had once been clear twenty feet away now blurred and ran between each other, and she almost didn’t notice Killian stepping up beside her, staring out at where Nibs had vanished.

He made an uneasy noise. “Now what?”

Emma bit her lip, placing her hands on her hips. “We wait.”

“You’re taking a big risk here, Swan.”

“I know,” she muttered. It was probably a big ask, making Killian put his trust in one of his greatest enemies – but something on the chessboard needed to change. Perhaps she could make this knight a turncoat. “He’ll come back, don’t worry.”

She spoke with far more assurance than she felt, and they both knew it.

Please come back, she begged silently into the sky.

He had to come back.

***

Hook didn’t like it one bit.

Staying in one place for so long was bad enough – he had learnt, through years of skirmishes with the Lost Ones and the natives, that doing so only left you an easy target for an ambush – but the idea of entrusting their fate to one of Pan’s minions was borderline repellent. Emma, unfortunately, could not be persuaded to the contrary. She had insisted on their setting up camp exactly where the boy had left them, and waiting on his return. Hook would merit a lot of shortcomings to Emma Swan since he had met her, but blind faith and gullibility had not been among them. The boy hadn’t even said he would return. He had simply run off into the woods without a single word either way.

Still, despite his misgivings, Hook did as he was bid.

Starkey and Noodler had set about laying the bones of their camp, pulling the canvas sheet out in order to provide shelter. Hook could taste it in the air, rain was coming. Much like the day before he had met Emma Swan, they were due a storm of the like he preferred to endure at sea, as safe as could be weathered aboard the deck of the Jolly Roger. It might not come tonight, but by the end of tomorrow, he was certain. The breeze was thick and moist as it lured the evening closer, and Hook started a fire.

They roasted a hare they had caught for supper and split it four ways, adding a helping of nuts in order to try and assuage any further rumbles of hunger, and Hook had cast a doubtful look at their remaining supplies. They had enough for another day or two, but they would soon need to replenish their load from the Jolly Rogers’ stores if they were to remain inland. Even this many years after claiming her, his spirits rose at the prospect of returning to his ship, for however short a time. It did not suit him to be so far from her bow.

Convince Emma Swan to leave Neverland and I’ll give you what you want most.

It felt as if the longer he spent with Emma Swan, the less he wanted her to fail.

She had impressed him today. Even if she insisted on ignoring Pan’s map, Hook had never once considered that the Lost Ones had no idea the Maze of Regrets existed – not in its true form. Witches. If he had ever wanted further proof of Pan’s wickedness, the fact that the Lost Ones were unknowingly being kept from their mothers was more than enough. Hook hadn’t doubted for a second that it was the ferocity of the boys that kept that Maze alive with sorrow.

Emma, however, had seen right through it for what it was.

I learnt what real strength is. It’s perseverance, it’s belief. It’s seeing the best in people even when it’s hard.

Had he ever been that way? He couldn’t remember now. For so long all he knew how to be was this. The only person he thought to look out for was himself. Hook would have made that boy suffer as much as needed until they got what they wanted – but Emma had pulled apart Nibs’ arrogant veneer, exposed the child underneath and found another way.

He wants you to stay lost so you can be soldiers in his war.

Seeing the best in people, even the Lost Ones. How, he could only wonder. How did she do it?

Gold took more than your hand from you, didn’t he?

Hook’s heart thumped heavily in his chest when he thought back to that moment. It was too much, too soon. He’d wanted to give her something, make her focus on unlocking the map, but he had opened up too far. He should never have told her his name. Even so, when her tongue curled around it, and her mouth let it fall like the gentle droplets of early rain, something fluttered in the pit of his stomach.

Killian.

He took a steadying breath.

Too close.

He was handing her over to Pan, anyway. None of it mattered.

Was he?

Something snapped in the bushes to his right, and Hook’s eyes were drawn immediately to the sound. In the dark he couldn’t make anything out, but rose cautiously to his feet anyway. A glance back at the fire showed Starkey and Emma speaking in low voices. Noodler stood at the opposite end of the clearing, one of his palms flat against a pine. He often did so when he was deep in thought. Nobody else had heard.

It could’ve been an animal, or the wind shaking something loose from the branches of a tree. It could be nothing at all.

It could be Nibs.

Something stuttered to life in his chest at the thought.

Emma’s optimism was wickedly contagious.

No sooner had he reached the edge of the clearing, than his eyes landed on the source of the sound.

A boy, grey eyes sullen, face smeared with dirt, was crouched amongst the brush. In his hands he held a spear with a sharp, inky black point Hook knew must be dreamshade, and he doubted he was alone. The boy stared back at Hook, defiantly, the corner of his mouth curling upwards.

Fuck Nibs.

Before Hook could raise the alarm, a shout came from behind him.

“Captain!”

From the other end of the clearing, a wall of three Lost Ones had emerged, brandishing wooden swords and bows, arrows already notched in place. When Hook turned back to the boy he had seen, he realised four more had lifted themselves up from the ground, fierce spectres of youth and darkness. A glance all around confirmed that which he’d already suspected.

They were surrounded.

“I expected this from you, Emma, you’re new here. But I’m especially disappointed in you, Captain.”

Pan’s voice was positively dripping with malice, stepping out of the dark until his expression was illuminated by the firelight, his eyes black and dancing with amusement. Hook let out a long, aggressive string of expletives.

Noodler and Starkey were standing with their swords raised, trying to work out which boy to settle on as their target – but Emma’s blade was pointed squarely at Pan. As the boys in front of Hook advanced, he allowed himself to be herded back over to join the others.

Pan shook his head in disappointment. “You know better than to ignore my rules.”

Hook said nothing, merely glared back at him.

“It’s – wait, what is that expression you’re so fond of? No, wait, don’t tell me,” Pan affected an expression of concentration. “It’s on the tip of my tongue.”

One of the overeager Lost Ones loosed a black-tipped arrow, and it sang just past the skin of Hook’s cheek before clattering to a stop on a trunk behind him.

“Oh, that’s it.”

Pan smiled, but his eyes were dark and hollow.

“Bad form.”

[meddlewithmycase]

Catherine Howard (c. 1523 – 13 February 1542) was queen consort of England from 1540 until 1541 as the fifth wife of Henry VIII. She was the daughter of Lord Edmund Howard and Joyce Culpeper, cousin to Anne Boleyn (the second wife of Henry VIII), and niece to Thomas Howard, 3rd Duke of Norfolk. Thomas Howard was a prominent politician at Henry's court, and he secured her a place in the household of Henry's fourth wife, Anne of Cleves, where she caught the King's interest. She married him on 28 July 1540 at Oatlands Palace in Surrey, just 19 days after the annulment of his marriage to Anne. He was 49, and she was still a teenager, at about 17 years old.

Catherine was one of the daughters of Lord Edmund Howard (c. 1478 – 1539) and Joyce Culpeper (c. 1480 – c. 1528). Her father's sister, Elizabeth Howard, was the mother of Anne Boleyn. Therefore, Catherine Howard was the first cousin of Anne Boleyn, and the first cousin once removed of Lady Elizabeth (later Queen Elizabeth I), Anne's daughter by Henry VIII. She also was the second cousin of Jane Seymour, as her grandmother Elizabeth Tilney was the sister of Seymour's grandmother Anne Say. As a granddaughter of Thomas Howard, 2nd Duke of Norfolk (1443–1524), Catherine had an aristocratic pedigree. Her father was not wealthy, being the third son among 21 children and disfavoured in the custom of primogeniture, by which the eldest son inherits all his father's estate.

Catherine was sent with some of her siblings to live in the care of her father's stepmother, the Dowager Duchess of Norfolk. The Dowager Duchess presided over large households at Chesworth House in Horsham in Sussex, and at Norfolk House in Lambeth where dozens of attendants, along with her many wards—usually the children of aristocratic but poor relatives—resided. While sending young children to be educated and trained in aristocratic households other than their own was common for centuries among European nobles, supervision at both Chesworth House and Lambeth was apparently lax. The Dowager Duchess was often at Court and seems to have had little direct involvement in the upbringing of her wards and young female attendants.

As a result of the Dowager Duchess's lack of discipline, Catherine became influenced by some older girls who allowed men into the sleeping areas at night for entertainment. The girls were entertained with food, wine, and gifts stolen from the kitchens. Catherine was not as well educated as some of Henry's other wives, although, on its own, her ability to read and write was impressive enough at the time. Her character has often been described as vivacious, giggly and brisk, but never scholarly or devout. She displayed great interest in her dance lessons, but would often be distracted during them and make jokes. She also had a nurturing side for animals, particularly dogs.

In the Duchess's household at Horsham, in around 1536, Catherine began music lessons with two teachers, one of whom was Henry Mannox. Mannox's exact age is unknown; although it has recently been stated that he was in his late thirties, perhaps 36, at the time, this is not supported by Catherine's biographers. Evidence exists that Mannox was not yet married, which would be highly unusual for someone from his background at the time to have reached mid-thirties without being married - he married sometime in the late 1530s, perhaps 1539, and there is also some evidence that he was of an age with two other men serving in the household, including his cousin Edward Waldegrave (who was in his late teens or early twenties from 1536-8). These pieces of evidence indicate that Mannox too was in his early to mid-twenties in 1538.

Catherine's uncle, the Duke of Norfolk, found her a place at Court in the household of the King's fourth wife, Anne of Cleves. As a young and attractive lady-in-waiting, Catherine quickly caught Henry's eye. The King had displayed little interest in Anne from the beginning, but on Thomas Cromwell's failure to find a new match for Henry, Norfolk saw an opportunity. The Howards may have sought to recreate the influence gained during Anne Boleyn's reign as queen consort. According to Nicholas Sander, the religiously conservative Howard family may have seen Catherine as a figurehead for their fight by expressed determination to restore Roman Catholicism to England. Catholic Bishop Stephen Gardiner entertained the couple at Winchester Palace with "feastings".

As the King's interest in Catherine grew, so did the house of Norfolk's influence. Her youth, prettiness and vivacity were captivating for the middle-aged sovereign, who claimed he had never known "the like to any woman". Within months of her arrival at court, Henry bestowed gifts of land and expensive cloth upon Catherine. Henry called her his 'very jewel of womanhood' (that he called her his 'rose without a thorn' is likely a myth). The French ambassador, Charles de Marillac, thought her "delightful". Holbein's portrait showed a young auburn-haired girl with a characteristically hooked Howard nose; Catherine was said to have a "gentle, earnest face." King Henry and Catherine were married on 28 July 1540, the same day Cromwell was executed. She was a teenager and he was 49. Catherine adopted the motto, Non autre volonté que la sienne or "No other wish but his" using the English translation from French. 

Catherine may have been involved during her marriage to the King with Henry's favorite male courtier, Thomas Culpeper, a young man who "had succeeded him in the Queen's affections", according to Dereham's later testimony. She had considered marrying Culpeper during her time as a maid-of-honor to Anne of Cleves. Culpeper called Catherine "my little, sweet fool" in a love letter. It has been alleged that in the spring of 1541 the pair were meeting secretly. Their meetings were allegedly arranged by one of Catherine's older ladies-in-waiting, Jane Boleyn, Lady Rochford the widow of Catherine's executed cousin, George Boleyn, Anne Boleyn's brother.

Culpeper and Dereham were arraigned at Guildhall on 1 December 1541 for high treason. They were executed at Tyburn on 10 December 1541, Culpeper being beheaded and Dereham being hanged, drawn and quartered. According to custom, their heads were placed on spikes atop London Bridge. Catherine was beheaded with a single stroke of the executioner's axe.

Lady Rochford was executed immediately thereafter on Tower Green. Both bodies were buried in an unmarked grave in the nearby chapel of St. Peter ad Vincula, where the bodies of Catherine's cousins Anne and George Boleyn also lay.

*some portraits here are not of Catherine. The only one known to survive is done by Hans Holbein the younger.

[drkfought]

   ─         the  mirrors  surrounding  you  did  as  they  were  meant  to ,  reflecting  back  a  spitting  image  of  jensen  ackles    -    but  it’s  clear  something  is  wrong  from  the  moment  that  a  vision  of   𝘫𝘢𝘤𝘬  𝘥𝘦𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨  𝘨𝘰𝘥   strikes  you .    perhaps  it  was  a  passing  daydream  in  the  frenzy  of  the  funhouse .    you  reassure  yourself    -    you’re  𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐍  𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑 ,   a   𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘺  𝘰𝘯𝘦   year  old   𝗙𝗜𝗥𝗘  𝗖𝗛𝗜𝗘𝗙   whose  virtue  lies  in  your   + loyalty   &   + selflessness ,  although  you’ve  been  told  that  you  tend  to  be  quite   - short  tempered   &  - self  loathing ,  and you’re associated with  𝒇𝒓𝒆𝒄𝒌𝒍𝒆𝒔  𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒅  𝒃𝒚  𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒔  𝒂𝒄𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒔  𝒔𝒌𝒊𝒏,  𝒄𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈  𝒈𝒍𝒂𝒔𝒔  𝒃𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉  𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒅𝒚  𝒌𝒏𝒖𝒄𝒌𝒍𝒆𝒔,  𝒕𝒉𝒆  𝒓𝒐𝒂𝒓  𝒕𝒐  𝒓𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒍𝒆  𝒕𝒐  𝒑𝒖𝒓𝒓  𝒐𝒇  𝒂𝒏  𝒆𝒏𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒆,  𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒅  𝒃𝒍𝒖𝒆  𝒋𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒔  𝒂𝒏𝒅  𝒇𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒍  𝒕𝒐𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅  𝒂𝒄𝒓𝒐𝒔𝒔  𝒂  𝒃𝒆𝒅 ,  by  those  around  you .    suddenly,  however,  you’ve found   𝐉𝐎𝐇𝐍'𝐒  𝐉𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐀𝐋   on  your  person    -    was  that  always  there ?     from  the  moment  you  leave  the  funhouse ,  memories  from  your  life  in   𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙣𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙖𝙡   have  begun  to  return   -   leaving  whoever  you  had  been  before  in  the  mirror’s  reflection  behind  you .    you  can  almost  hear   𝚁𝙰𝙼𝙱𝙻𝙴  𝙾𝙽   by  𝙻𝙴𝙳  𝚉𝙴𝙿𝙿𝙻𝙴𝙸𝙽  following  in  your  wake .

hi  i  love  dean  winchester  so  stinkin’  much   ...   i  am  ....  so  excited .    he  deserves  a  life  where  he  wasn’t  hunting  monsters  all  the  time !    one  where  he  got  a  job   &   had  kids   &   is  just  living  life !    let  dean  have  a  life !

full name :     dean  henry  winchester . alises :   the  righteous  man .   the  sword  of  michael .   squirrel . age :   forty  one . gender & pronouns :   cis male ,  he / him . sexual & romantic orientation :    bisexual / biromantic . species :   human . identifying  marks :    multiple  scars  across  his  body .   some  looking  like  they  came  from  knives ,  others  from  guns .    his  memory  on  how  he  got  most  of  them  is  fuzzy

    ─        𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍  𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 .

i  will  try  to  make  this  short .    dean  was  born  to  mary   &   john  winchester   &   for  four  years  he  had  the  most  simple  apple  pie  life  a  four  year  old  could  ask  for .    in  1983 ,  a  demon  went  into  the  winchester  house  to  visit  their  newborn  son :  dean’s  younger  brother  sam .    when  mary  interrupted  the  demon’s  visitation ,  he  killed  her .   slashed  open  her  stomach   &   burned  her  on  the  ceiling .    dean’s  father ,  john ,  witnessed  the  terrible  end  of  his  wife’s  life   &   though  he  made  it  out  alive  with  both  sam   &   dean ,  the  event  would  irreversibly  change  him .

john  became  obsessed  with  discovering  what  it  was  that  killed  mary .   he  learned  to  hunt  the  supernatural   &  ruthlessly  trained  his  sons  to  do  the  same .    dean’s  toddler  life  of  toys  turned  into  tinkering  with  guns ,  his  warm  bed  into  dirty  motels ,   &   his  carefree  existence  into  only  worrying  over  his  younger  brother .    he  became  the  perfect  killer  but  it  took  a  toll  on  him .    his  father ,  far  from  perfect  even  before  this ,  became  harsh  on  dean .   molding  him  until  he  was  more  dutiful  soldier  than  he  was  boy .   dean  did  everything  his  father  asked  &  followed  his  every  order  with  blind  faith   &   even  then  he  would  never  be  the  perfect  son  to  john .    sam ,  on  the  other  hand ,  rebelled  against  the  life  john  gave  them .   though  dean  tried  constantly  to  settle  their  explosive  arguments  as  best  he  could  no  matter  his  thoughts  on  the  matter  at  hand ,  desperate  for  peace  between  the  two ,  he  still  couldn’t  stop  sam  from  running  away  in  the  end .    he  wanted  to  hate  sam  for  it  at  first ,  but  he  never  could .

years  later  when  john  went  missing  on  a  hunt ,  dean  reached  out  to  his  estranged  brother  for  help .   the  job  was  supposed  to  be  a  simple  one  but  after  coming  back  unsuccessful  to  the  tragic  death  of  sam’s  girlfriend  ( same  as  their  mothers ,  in  fact )   sam  entered  back  into  his  life  for  good .   

though  the  plots  of  both  heaven   &   hell ,  sam  &  dean  became  pawns  in  the  story  of  the  world’s  end .    the  apocalypse  slowly  set  into  motion  &  started  with  the  winchesters  at  the  center  of  it  all .    even  though  they  managed  stop  the  world’s  end ,  though ,  it  was  hardly  the  last  threat  to  humanity .    as  years  passed ,  the  brothers  found  themselves  thrust  into  apocalypse  after  apocalypse .     an  endless  cycle  that  they ,  eventually ,  discovered  was  god’s  doing  all  along .   they  were  simply  the  main  characters  of  a  never  ending  tragic  story  that  god  was  writing .    furious ,  the  two  brothers ,  with  help  from  their  rebel  angel  best  friend  &  the  half  angel  son  on  lucifer  himself ,  devised  a  way  to  defeat  god  for  good .    in  the  end  they  succeeded .   jack ,  the  mentioned  son  of  lucifer ,  took  god’s  place  after  his  defeat .    the  world  is  their’s  in  the  end .   they ,  for  the  first  time ,  get  to  choose  their  own  paths .

   ─        𝐀𝐋𝐔𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐃  𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 .

there  was  still  a  fire  at  the  winchester  house  when  dean  was  four  years  old .    an  accident  this  time .    an  electrical  fire .     a  normal  tragedy .     their  mom  was  still  lost  but  dean ,  holding  onto  the  bundle  that  was  his  little  brother ,  watched  as  the  fire  fighters  pulled  his  dad  from  the  flames .     sitting  with  them ,  brother  in  his  arms ,  while  they  consoled  him   &    let  him  wear  their  helmets  would  always  be  a  far  more  comforting  memory  to  dean  than  the  ones  his  father  gave  him  in  the  years  to  come .    john  winchester  became  distant .   negligent .    borderline  abusive .    dean  did  his  best  to  take  the  bulk  of  what  their  grief  drowned  father  put  on  them ,  trying  to  shield  sam ,   &  gave  a  lot  of  his  life  to  helping  raise  sam  where  john  fell  short .   they  moved  around  a  lot ,  finally  settling  in  alucard  when  dean  was  around  seventeen .

when  he  was  a  late   teen  if  he  wasn’t  at  home  or  sneaking  out  for  a  smoke   &   some  girls ,   dean  worked  at  being  a  volunteer  firefighter .    it  was  something ,  he  thought ,  slightly  productive  to  do  with  his  life  as  it  was  already  obvious  to  him  that  he  wouldn’t  be  able  to  go  to  college  with  sam  still  needing  him  around .   at  age  eighteen ,  with  his  high  school  diploma  stating  he  graduated  with  average  grades ,  dean  officially  joined  the  fire  force  at  an  entry  level   &   began  saving  up  money  for  his  own  place .    a  place  away  from  his  father  but  close  enough  that  sam  could  use  it  to  get  away  at  any  time  as  well .   though ,  as  the  year  went  on ,  he  found  that  john  would  have  been  unlikely  to  allow  dean  to  live  under  his  roof  anyway .    

dean  was  notorious  with  women   &   thought  himself  as  careful  but  clearly  not  as  careful  as  he  thought .    when  he  found  out  he  was  going  to  be  a  dad  at  eighteen  he  initially  rejected  the  idea ,  wanting  nothing  to  do  with  the  child  out  of  fear  of  turning  into  his  father .    sam  was  the  one  who  talked  him  down  from  the  anxiety .   with  his  encouragement ,  dean  slowly  worked  to  learn  how  to  be  a  parent .   preparing  a  room .    reading  parenting  books .   anything .    it  came  as  a  shock  a  month  before  the  due  date  to  when  he  found  out  the  mother  was  backing  out  of  keeping  the  child .    she  had  been  the  one  initially  for  raising  it  at  first  but  suddenly  felt  she  couldn’t  do  it .    though  he’d  be  on  his  own ,  dean  had  steeled  himself  to  becoming  a  father  too  much  to  let  the  girl  to  go  up  for  adoption .    beverly  winchester  was  born  feburary  13th   &   dean  took  full  custody  as  her  sole  guardian .    he  kept  in  touch  with  bevery’s  mother  still ,  who  went  on  to  study  psychology  outside  alucard .

being  a  single  father  was  far  from  easy  but  dean  managed ,  always  taking  help  where  he  could  from  his  brother  or  from  friends .    one  friend  even  got  closer  than  others .    when  beverly  was  nearing  three  years  old ,  dean  started  seeing  a  foreign  exchange  student  from  england  who  was  taking  classes  at  the  local  university   &  the  casual  feeling  of  the  affair  wasn’t  there  for  long .    things  blossomed  into  something  serious   &   when  it  was  discovered  she  was  pregnant ,  this  time  dean  was  far  more  sure  about  things  than  when  he  was  twenty .     the  wedding  was  small    &   around  nine  months  later  dean  became  a  father  of  two  as  simon  joined  the  winchester  family .  

for  a  few  years  this  seemed  the  perfect  arrangement .    dean  worked  up  through  the  ranks  at  the  station ,  setting  himself  up  to  be  the  new  fire  chief  one  day ,   &   raised  his  kids  happily  with  his  wife .    but  perfect  sometimes  doesn’t  last  long .    their  relationship ,  after  all ,  had  been  a  rushed  one .    after  around  six  years ,  things  simply  didn’t  have  the  same  spark  as  they  used  to .     the  divorce  wasn’t  nasty ,  they  knew  it  was  a  mutual  thing ,  but  it  still  stung .     he  left  the  court  as  a  single  father  again ,  now  with  joint  custody  of  his  son .    he  didn’t  seen  simon  much  after  the  divorce .   shortly  after ,  he  &  his  mother  moved  back  to  england  which  dean  was  always  bitter  about .    though  simon  came  to  visit  sometimes   &   dean  called  whenever  he  could ,  he  always  felt  like  he  was  far  from  the  boy .

at  fourty  one ,  years  later ,  he’s  gotten  well  back  on  his  feet .    no  serious  relationships  seem  to  stick  but  at  work  he’s  finally  gotten  fire  chief .    he  misses  being  in  the  middle  of  the  action  sometimes ,  but  he  loves  his  job  nonetheless .     if  not  at  work  he’s  visiting  his  brother ,  the  bar ,  fixing  his  car ,  or  dedicating  time  to  beverly   &   simon  who  has  recently  moved  to  alucard  to  be  around  dean ,  much  to  his  delight .    as  his  life  is  coming  back  to  him ,  though ,  it  is  stressing  him  out .   the  world  was  already  dangerous  without  remembering  monsters .    he  feels  as  though  this  is  just  another  story  he’s  now  lived  out   &   isn’t  even  sure  whats  real .

  ─        𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑  𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 .

father  to  BEVERLY  MARSH  &  SIMON  SNOW  in  alucard .    he  will  absolutely  go  off  on  you  if  you  are  mean  to  his  kids .    yes ,  this  includes  other  kids  who  bully  his  kids .   he  doesn’t  care  he’ll  yell  at  you  for  being  an  asshole  no  matter  your  age .   absolutely  no  one  messes  with  his  kids .

has  had  beverly  around  since  she  was  born  but  has  seen  simon  infrequently  since  he  was  about  six  since  simon’s  mother  took  him  back  to  england  with  her .    he  doesn’t  love  simon  any  less ,  but  he ‘s  struggling  with  fact  they  don’t  know  each  other  as  well  as  dean  would  like .    he  hates  that  his  son  grew  up  so  far  away  from  him  with  visits   &   phone  calls  too  few   &   far  in  between .

is  also  now  having  to  cope  with  the  fact  that ,  in  this  new  life  he  remembers ,  he  doesn’t  even  HAVE  his  kids .    closest  thing  he  has  to  a  child  there  is  jack   &   he  doesn’t  even  know  if  jack  is  okay .

still  has  the  impala  here .    can’t  have  dean  without  his  car .

while  he  is  the  fire  chief ,  fixing  cars  is  a  huge  hobby  of  his .    if  he  didn’t  love  his  job ,  he  would  absolutely  leave  it  to  work  as  a  mechanic  at  the  local  garage .

while  he  mostly  works  on  his  car  himself ,  he  still  brings  his  car  to  the  garage  a  few  times  a  year  for  things  that  his  own  garage  doesn’t  have  the  tools  for .   they  know  him  there  from  his  recognizable  car .

his  father  has  been  alive  for  sometime  but  he’s  recently  found  out  he  died  from  a  stroke  in  his  sleep .   dean  is  stuck  between  the  duty  of  giving  his  father  a  proper  funeral   &  his  own  bitterness  at  the  man  for  how  he  treated  him   &  sam .     this  is  only  worsened  by  the  memories  of  john  that  will  come  back .

he  is  bisexual !   because  i’ve  watched  this  show   &   have  eyes !    i  know !    is  he  repressed   a  lot   &  hasn’t  exactly  had  an  offical  coming  out ?   also  yes !    doesn’t  mean  he  HASN’T made  out   &   gotten  with  a  guy  or  two  in  the  past .   just  means  he  never  felt  like  he  could  say  anything  about  it  all  growing  up   &   now  just  figures  it’s  too  late .

uuuuuuuuuuuuh   anyway .    i’ll  add  to  this  more  if  i  think  of  more .

[themusicsweetly]

Caitriona Balfe | Delta Sky Magazine

It’s Her Time.

From playing Outlander’s centuries-jumping heroine to the strong, outspoken wife of a racecar drive in Ford v Ferrari, Caitriona Balfe is all in.

Caitriona Balfe is a tireless worker. In her late teens, she walked in more than 250 runway shows for some of the world’s most prestigious fashion houses, including Louis Vuitton, Chanel, and Givenchy. And these past five years?For more than 55 episodes and four seasons, the Dublin-born actress starred as Claire Fraser, the heroic, tender and altogether uncompromising time traveler on Starz’s much-acclaimed historical fiction epic Outlander, based on the book series of the same name.

It’s a nonstop life for the 40-year-old, whose work on Outlander has landed her four consecutive Golden Globe nominations for best actress in a TV drama. For her fans, however, it’s meant that they’ve rarely seen her take on outside work; she says she only takes on roles witch which she is truly enamored. One such is her latest—in the James Mangold directed Ford v Ferrari. Balfe portrays Mollie Miles, the equal-parts wise-cracking, ironfisted and supportive wife of iconic British racecar drive Ken Miles (Christian Bale) who, with the guidance of automotive icon Carroll Shelby (Matt Damon) and the backing of Henry Ford II, defeated the perennial champion Ferrari racing team at the 1966 24 Hours of Le Mans race in France.

Balfe, whose last film was 2016′s Money Monster, says that successfully balancing her various roles come down to maintaining a healthy life-work balance. “As an actor you can’t just always be on output mode,” she says. “You have to feed your creativity by living a little.

Claire is a fiercely self-empowered woman on Outlander, so I was initially surprised to learn you had taken on the role of Mollie Miles in Ford v Ferrari. The role could have been a secondary one, but you infuse her with a palpable grit and an autonomous streak.

“Obviously, this work has always been dominated by men. And really it is still so dominated by men. But what I really wanted to portray and really get across in this film is that these men who’ve done extraordinary things never do these things in a vacuum. Every single decision that Ken made and every time he was able to go race and every single time he was able to push the limits and stay out longer it was because Mollie was there and because she supported him and because she was raising their child and because she was making sure that the bills were paid and that they weren’t going to lose their house. It was a time when so many women had to give up their ambitions and their dreams so that their husbands could follow theirs. I look at my parents’ marriage: My dad was the breadwinner, but my mom was very much the person who kept the family together and kept everything running.”

James Mangold also directed Girl, Interrupted. Was that a comfort, knowing that he values complex and multifaceted female characters?

“Oh, definitely. Knowing that Jim [Mangold] was going to direct was such a draw for me. Because Girl, Interrupted featured very heavily in my life when it came out. And then, obviously, he did Walk the Line as well. Even if they’re not the central characters, he just has a such a wonderful way of making the women in his films have a full life and a full purpose. I thought that was Mollie. She was the mone steering her and Ken’s relationship to the center and keeping their ship on the right path. It was just like Jim would actually fight to make that role what it was on the page. Because often you read scripts and the role is one way, and then by the time you get to shooting, it’s like, ‘Oh, sorry, that scene got cut. And, yeah, that other scene got cut, too.’“

For the film, you consulted with Mollie’s real-life son, Peter Miles. What did he tell you about her?

“That Ken showed up on their first date in a vintage car and it broke down and they got lost and she got in trouble because she got home so late (laughs). So this life of chaos and cars has been there since day one of their relationship.

You’re no stranger to wonderful scene partners, including Outlander’s Sam Heughan. And there’s already Oscar buzz around Christian Bale’s portrayal of Ken Miles.

I think Christian is one of the finest actors we have at the moment—and probably of our entire generation. But he’s also such a present actor: When you’re in scenes with him, he is there 100 percent. He gives you everything on every take. It’s such a joy to work with someone like that. He’s so humble and about the work that it was just so easy to get right in there, roll up ourselves and hopefully create what feels like this organic dynamic to their relationship.

Has being on a show like Outlander limited the outside projects you can take on?

Well, I don’t think people are banging down my door all the time, but it’s a balance. I had a very long hiatus between Seasons 1 and 2, and that’s when I did Money Monster. Between Season 2 and 3, it was a much shorter hiatus and I chose to take a rest, because I was exhausted at that time. And then again, between Season 3 and 4, we didn’t really take a hiatus. If something had come up that I thought, ‘Oh, my God, I have to do this no matter what,’ then, yeah, I probably would have done it and not slept and ran myself into the ground. If you’re not invested in the character and you’re not invested in the story, it’ll feel pretty hollow. You need something that moves you.

If nothing else, the pace and shooting schedule on a film must be wildly different.

With Outlander, it’s almost like we shoot a film every five weeks. I think there’s something to being on TV and having to move through things so quickly and use your instincts; it’s very much about the immediacy. And then on Ford v Ferrari, it was like, ‘Wait, we have three months to film 180 pages?” (laughs). You really get to sit with your character and question your choices and hopefully arrive at something that feels really honest. I mean, maybe there’s something to the idea of ‘the first instinct is the right one.’ But it was just nice to be able to sit with the material for a very long time and ruminate over it.

Have you seen an evolution in the caliber of television programming?

I think we’re very lucky at the moment that the lines between TV and film are being blurred in terms of the quality of writing, the quality of production. And I’ve been so lucky that I’ve come along during this golden time in TV, and specifically with Outlander. But I must say it’s a bit sad that it’s happening at the expense of great filmmaking. Because I think we’re losing that great middle ground for films—where it’s not the big tentpole comic book franchise films. There’s something beautiful about those sorts of compact movies as well. The ones where you can go and fall in love with characters and be taken on a journey for 2 1/2 hours. I would feel very bereft if we lost that altogether.

Outlander is principally shot in Scotland. Have you made your permanent home there?

We shoot there 10 to 11 months every ear, so, obviously, for the majority of the time I’m based in Scotland. And then whenever we’re on hiatus, I generally try and get back to the states because I lived there for 13 years before I got the show. So it’s sort of my de facto home. I think in the beginning, it felt like a really long and extended break from my reality, because I had been living in LA. When we came to shoot Season 1, we only knew that we had this one season order. So i dove into this bubble for a year, and then you come out on the other end and are like, ‘Oh, I’ll go back to my life now.’ At a certain point, everyone on the show realized, ‘This could actually run for a long time and we have something really special here.’ At that point, you have to think of this as your life and your city. And there’s something really nice about that. because at that point, you start looking around and putting down some roots.

And now you’re a tried-and-true Scotswoman.

Well, I did have a temporary apartment there for probably longer than I should have (laughs). Thankfully, now I finally have my own home.