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#and i am so attached to it and thought about many things for it
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Evolution X-Men meeting Deadpool for the first time
An idea for the first episode Deadpool would appear in the show. It'd take place during early season 2. I don't have enough ideas to write the whole thing but here's the introduction
After the Brotherhood fled and the old warehouse was empty once more, the X-Men could finally focus on their unexpected guest. Through the darkness where he stood, they could see him sheathing his katanas and stretching his arms.
"Phiii-ew! Nothing like a good workout after a mind-numbingly boring sail home!" He said, rolling his neck and shoulders. "Warms my cold, unfeeling heart to see the streets just as crime-infested as I left them!"
After a second, the man stepped towards them and into the light. The younger members of the X-Men couldn't help, but gasp when he revealed himself to them.
The person who joined their fight was wearing a red and black costume that covered his whole body, including his face. Outside of the twin katanas on his back, he had two gun pouches attached to the sides of a multi-pocketed belt. His white eyes stared at them with unclear intent.
"You?!" While Kitty, Rogue and Kurt were intimidated by his presence, Scott and Jean stood their ground. They appeared to be more disgusted than afraid. Surprisingly, the man seemed to recognise them as well.
"Jeanie! Scottie! Long time no see! Come here and give uncle Deadpool a hug!" He said, spreading his arms. Before he ran at them, Jean used her powers to throw him into the air. His enthusiasm faltered.
"Cold. I guess you don't want all the radical gifts I bough you abroad!" He said, starting to levitate upside down. "Do kids these days still say it? Do they say 'radical'? I hate that word. I hope it'll die out quickly."
"You know this weirdo?" Kitty whispered to them.
"He calls himself Deadpool." Jean stated. "He used to break into the Institute regularly."
"That's all you have to say about little ol' me?" Deadpool interrupted, then traced a line from his eye down his cheek. "You can't see it, but I just shed a sad tear. I thought we were friends."
"We're not-"
"As (I'm pretty sure) my pop used to say, if you want something done right, do it yourself!" The mercenary clapped his hands, interrupting her again. He kicked his legs and pushed himself back up so he could face them properly.
"I go by many names! Deadpool is one, but some prefer to call me the Merc with the Mouth!" He stated, pointing his thumbs at himself. "The world-famous mercenary willing to do any kind of job for a good pay, weapon expert, master of all known fighting styles and three times Champion of Hot Dog Eating in West Virginia! This city used to belong to me, but the merc job is unforgiving and I had to leave it for like twenty years!"
"We haven't seen you in two years." Scott corrected.
"It felt like twenty to me, so it must've been! Now I come back and see that you X-Dorks grew in numbers!" Deadpool continued, then crossed his arms and looked away. "Not that I'm bitter, or anything. I can do so much better than your little rich kid houseclub anyway."
"... Wait, he was an X-Man?!" Rouge asked, baffled.
"Professor tried giving him a chance once." Jean sighed. "He almost blew up the mansion."
"Like that old thing doesn't blow up every other week, am I right, guys?" Deadpool snorted and rose his hand. Outside of the distance between them, no one was willing to give him a high five. He waited a few more seconds and then high fived himself.
"Is it bad that he kinda reminds me of Kurt when he has too much sugar?" Kitty snickered.
"Don't even joke like that!" Kurt didn't like that.
"The only difference is that Kurt isn't..." Scott began, then whistled and swirled his finger around the side of his head.
"I believe the term you're looking for is 'able to think outside the box', three eyes." Deadpool overheard them and air quoted. Without any warning, he disappeared in a small flash of energy.
"What the-?!" Kurt cried out as they all stepped back in surprise. After a second, the mercenary reappeared behind them.
"And who those adorable new faces might be?" His voice startled them all. "No, no, don't tell me! You look like Jessica," He said, pointing at surprised Kitty. "Your super power is shrinking. You look like Bridget and you love being different!" He pointed at Rogue, making her scoff at him. "And you look like Elvis! You have an eternal bad hair day!" He said, pointing at Kurt.
"What?" The blue boy squinted.
"Deadpool, stay away from them!" Scott warned, flashing his visor in readiness. "Whatever you came here for, you're not getting it from us!"
"Look at you all grown up and shouting orders like a boss man! Relax, kid, I have no quarrel with you today. I just wanted to catch up and meet new people! Speaking of..." Deadpool said, then reloaded his gun that he suddenly grabbed. Something darkened in his eyes. "Where's Wolverine?"
The other X-Men could see Jean and Scott getting tense. It seemed that despite their distate, they were scared of the man after all.
Suddenly, Deadpool seemed to hear something and his head perked up a bit. They could almost see a smirk forming on his face.
"Right on the clock." He mused. He spun his gun in his hand, then without any warning, whipped back and fired a single shot.
Wolverine had entered the warehouse and managed to sneak behind them. He quickly released his claws and slashed the bullet mid-air. Before other X-Men could stop him, Deadpool switched, pulled out his katanas and teleported again. He reappeared right in front of Logan and took a swing at him. His weapons and the mutant's claws clashed.
"Kurt, get everyone outta here!" The X-Man shouted. The boy nodded. The kids came closer and he teleported them away, leaving the two alone.
"I had a feelin' I smelled a rottin' brain somewhere!" Wolverine growled.
"You're the one to talk, dog-breath!" Deadpool retorted, trying to slash him again. Wolverine blocked him. "Dog, or bear, or some other animal that smells bad! I don't want to say badger, because I feel like I'd be beating a dead horse at this point-"
"I miss the silence already!" Logan said. He roared and tried to throw a punch.
Meanwhile, the group reappeared outside.
"What does this Deadpool guy want with Logan?!" Rouge couldn't help, but grow concerned.
"They have... history." Scott explained. "I'm pretty sure they hate each other."
"Like he and Sabertooth?" Kitty asked.
"Honestly? We have no idea." Jean admitted. "It's best to just stay out of the way and let Logan handle it. He always does."
As soon as she said that, they heard an explosion that made them jump. Suddenly, Wolverine fell out of a window with a trail of smoke following him. Deadpool jumped after him and skilfully landed on the ground. When he stood up, the kids saw that he was holding a bomb with his face painted on it.
"He has explosives?!" Kurt shouted, tugging his hair. Logan returned on his feet, smoke from the explosion still dancing on his body.
"I thought you were done takin' bounties on me!" He shouted.
"I am, but it's an emergency!" Deadpool said, throwing the bomb from hand to hand. "I need this money more than I need food and water!"
"A sellout through and through!" Wolverine said, then charged back. Deadpool let him get close, teleported, and then tried to throw a bomb at him from the distance. Logan kicked it right into the ocean and it exploded in the water.
The mercenary quickly switched back to his katanas and charged with full force at his opponent. There was a lot of slashing, dodging and rolling involved. Neither of them managed to reach each other for a good while. Finally, Wolverine used an opportunity to pin Deadpool to the ground with one arm behind his back.
"Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!" He cried. "That's foul play! You're disqualified for being a bad sport!"
"Cry me a river, Wilson." Logan tsked. "Whoever hired you must've not known that you always lose to me."
"Yeah. That might be true." The mercenary said, another almost visible smirk appearing on his face. Little did Wolverine know, his free arm was trying to reach for a hidden pocket in his costume. "By the way, don't think that I forgot to bring a souvenir or two for my bestest friend. Why don't you let me go so I can show it to you?"
"I ain't lettin' you go that easily, bub. You're gonna tell me exactly who sent you and what kinda money made you break your promise."
"Oh, I love to talk! Especially with you!" He quietly unzipped the pocket and reached inside. "But you know I can't talk about my employers. Merc 101. Buuuut, I can tell you all about the crazy places I've been to for the past two years! I learned like three different languages! Do you want me to say something in Chinese?"
"If you're tryin' to make me angry, it ain't gonna work. We've been doin' this song and dance long enough for me to know when you're lookin' for a distraction."
"Awww, you care about me enough to know my strategy! You so deserve that little treat I bought you!"
"Logan, look out!" Rouge shouted, but she was too late. Logan felt a sharp sting in his leg. He gasped and quickly pushed himself off Deadpool. He looked down and saw a dart sticking from his thigh. The X-Men were ready to intervene.
"Do not get involved!" Logan snarled, sensing their intent. His head was already beginning to spin.
"Yeah, you better listen to Papa Wolvie! This is between us adults!" Deadpool shouted, looking at them as well. The mutant suddenly fell to his knees, trying to fight whatever Deadpool injected into him, but it seemed stronger than his healing factor. His eyes started feeling heavy, and finally, he fell lifelessly on the ground.
"Logan!" The kids yelled. Jean was already floating whatever she could to throw at Deadpool.
"Don't worry, X-Kids! I promise to give him back as soon as I get my money! Follow your dreams and stay in school!" Deadpool gave them a peace sign before he kneeled in front of Wolverine and teleported away with him.
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creativly-anxious · 1 year
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The fact that I'm making honest to God Harry Potter aus in 2023 is wild
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finexbright · 1 year
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fluffypotatey · 11 months
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Shadowpeach's reaction to believing the other is dating again
ANON I AM SO SORRY T^T i meant to reply to this the moment I read it then got distracted and now it’s almost 1am (edit: it is now 1:30 lmao)
anyway,
you have come to ask me, a girlie who is a sucker for unhealthy shadowpeach and long time lover of the jealousy & possessive tropes, about shadowpeach’s hypothetical reactions of the two monkeys believing the other is back in the dating scene?
well, obviously, they would be completely fine. absolutely no negative reactions or breakdowns or obsessive thoughts hindering their ability to function and be mentally healthy. of course.
jk i lied: THEY WOULD BE SO HORRIBLE LMAO
however, i feel like swk would be more subtle about it. like maybe he hears something out of context said by MK or Mei or Tang or Red Son or Sandy (who might have also jumped to the same conclusion) and is like “oh……” and then is oddly quiet for maybe a month, freaking out MK
also, SWK would have his own internal battle of wanting to see Macky to confirm but also not wanting to see Macackle because the confirmation would break him. but he would make so many excuses to see Macaroon by visiting Pigsy’s noodle shop then chicken out when the time does come (the funny part of me says that Pigsy is the only one aware of SWK’s true intentions and is very annoyed about it)
the anger doesn’t really come until SWK feels fed up with Macaroni’s “mixed signals,” meaning Macky’s very bad attempts at being civil/flirting. because “if Macky thinks he can just use my feelings while being in a relationship he can think again!” (despite Macky never being in a relationship but Wukong never confirmed this so is mad for the sake of this hypothetical SO and himself while struggling with his own very messy feelings. because he likes it when Mac has his attention on him, he likes it when Mac tries to woo him the same way he had tried when they were younger and ignorant, he likes it when Mac cannot help but look at Wukong, he likes it when he makes Mac forget all about that stupid significant other because Wukong and Mac used to be something and could still be that something if Mac just gave Wukong a chance or if they had never ended their old relationship like the way they did. if only, if only, if only, if only, if only—
with Macky, ahahahaaaaaaa hoo boy.
not subtle. very unsubtle. like, yes, even Wukong can see and notice Macky’s very unsubtle and unstable self but unlike everybody else who is aware of the reason, Wukong would just be confused on why Macky is always weirdly snappy and grabby and always feel the need to mention Wukong’s love life????
anyway, Macky would not react well. 1) because it feeds into his angry theory that Wukong found their relationship to be superficial and temporary 2) he has been revived for, uh, *checks watch* not very long, so imagine going through a severe break up and dying them being resurrected and trying to enact revenge on your ex (of whom the feelings are still too raw) but you’ve been out of time for so long that you cannot process shit 3) it is my belief that Macky had nobody else as close to him as Wukong was
so, Macky hearing through the very botched grapevine that Wukong is back in the dating scene? man’s is not handling it well. house/apartment/whatever establishment he was staying in is trashed. he replans his revenge against Wukong. he stalks Wukong obsessively bc he has to see that bastard in the act because maybe then he’ll be free. he would sabotage any and all attempts of demons, humans, whoever that whispers about pursuing Wukong because….reasons
(obviously the reasons are not the fact that Wukong moving on terrifies him, the fact that he can be so easily replaced hurts, the fact that he cannot let go despite everything, the fact that Wukong still smiles the same, that Wukong still laughs the same but it’s so much lighter, that he understood what it was like to be loved and cared about by Wukong. to have all of his attention on Macky, to hold him so gently even though these same hands could break him (and have), to be treasured and desired by someone so powerful. how could Mackarell give up something so precious? he is still selfish and has been deprived for f that love for too long. why on earth would he ever wish for someone else to have a piece of what he once had?)
so yeah i’d say they would be coping sO well :)
#this is a side tangent but shadowpeach deserves some more fics with both or either of the two idiots being jealous#please#for me#ley them simmer or wallow in their personally inflicted angst/pining soup while i giggle and read with delight#and when i say i’m a lover of this trope i also mean i’m a connoisseur of this trope#i have tastes and am picky about it#bc there are some…….not great works that try this trope (to put it politely) and it hurts bc i KNOW it could be written sO good#also funny note: this reply was supposed to end after I shout ‘they would be so horrible lmao’#but then I thought nah lemme share my elaborated thoughts#another side note: I am sure y’all notice I call Wukong and macky’s thing a relationship instead of friendship or situationship mostly bc#a relationship can mean many things and my view of shadowpeach is both romantic and qpr#like the vibes fit for both of them and I’ll just roll with either#but i struggle to call their thing a friendship because to me that takes away some of the aspects of swk and macky#do i think they even dated in the past? no but i DO think the two were so attached to the hip that to outsiders they saw 2 boyfriends even#if nothing was technically official of their relationship being romantic or platonic but it blurred the lines so well nobody could be 100%#& even in the current plot their relationship is STILL blurred to me so i can’t pick and like both options (both are severely unhealthy ofc#lmk#shadowpeach#asks#anonymous
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ninjaaa-go · 1 year
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why am I getting so emotional about a little plastic ghost??? morro seriously has such a grip on me it’s insane
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blackwaxidol · 5 months
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"A desk would fix me" is such a simple but truthful declaration... I see it, the end is in sight...
Lumbar support...
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correct-bangtannies · 2 years
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I don't even like men and I'm somehow already a military wife, what goes on
PS. Don't open the tags unless you want a big ass wall of text of me rambling on your screen
#hit#im just honestly so glad that I've become a lot more chill with the whole being an army thing#in the sense that i used to be a lot more attached and hyped over everything#i do still get very hyped and i do still have an attachment to them n their work but y'know just more toned down#(i mean i remember the days of staying up all night to watch award shows knowing damn well they'd always perform last)#(mma 2018 was an emotional rollercoaster like i legit cried a little from the tiredness and being overwhelmed with the performance)#so im glad im a lot more calm about the enlistment news than what i would've been say three years ago before they started to#take longer breaks and eventually announce the hiatus this year#it's like they did it in purpose so that the fandom would grow a bit more used to it n im glad to see that a huge majority are very calm#many are sad ofc but its not being treated as some kind of horrific news#if anything ppl are coping with humor including me lmao#so idk im mostly just happy for them that they're taking their VERY well deserved break before doing their service#i just hope everything goes well and is decently peaceful (as peaceful as enlistment can be at least lol) for them once they're there#now why am i rambling in the tags? bc i need to put my thoughts in order but i don't wanna clog my blog with a long ass wall of text 💀#I'm at least relieved to know that they already have a set plan of when they're going to go and return + BH is sure af gonna keep putting#out a lot of content that they've filmed over all these years#i mean run bts; documentaries; probably even music and ofc not all of them are gonna go at the exact same time#and ofc stuff related to the HYYH and Chakho#them being absent won't as hard for most hopefully#and hey 2 years aint nothing ive waited far longer for stuff to come out than that we'll be fine!#*cries in silksong and the YOI movie
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the-everqueen · 9 months
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my gender is "doomed by the narrative"
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cappyjara · 1 year
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seeing the mario movie in like an hour letsa gooooooo
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emile-hides · 2 years
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My mind is plagued by them so badly if anyone wants to do me the biggest solid and send me asks about them I know no one goes here anymore but this is for me to say my many thoughts at a void I just need a single prompt
#Fairy Tail#FairyTail#I made this to put my Queer headcanons on paper like I did for the Baka&Test cast but I just couldn't do it#There's so many fuckin guys y'all#I have so many thoughts there's so many guys just pick one and ask my thoughts I'll write you a novel#This is the second biggest solid you can do for me rn honestly brain fuckin full#I did my best to even slightly organize my emotions for these guys but honestly there is no one category that can hold any of them#I'm so stupidly attached to the Catholic Arc of Fairy Tail it's an Anime only Lucy centered filler Arc and I'm so attached to it#It's got all my favorite guys it's got Gonzolas it's got Jackpot it's got Sammy#It's got Catholic Guilt and the horrifying notion that inanimate objects in Fairy Tail's universe have will and feelings and conciousness#but not the ability to realize they have these things or to act upon them lest a Wizard uses cursed magic to give them human form#It's fucked as hell and I think about Laponte more often than he deserves#but also it has a buff ass blue cat with a Brother Complex and a Berdly level of bitchy smart boy attitued#And the second dumbest man ever written#Oh btw Fairy Tail is full of Dumbest Men You'll Ever Meet you want a dumb man Fairy Tail's your place no one thinks in this house#*Shakes Toby* Behold the dumbest fuckin guy ever written I love him so much I want to rattle his pea brain around his skull#I'm so abnormal about Fairy Tail guys please ask me about them I am alone at sea#as I deserve honestly but I'm still wishing for a message in a bottle#you could also commission me that's cool too that's solider number 1 right there
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mrfoox · 7 days
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Me: yaaaay, new lil guy that likes me :3
Also me realizing that he have little experience and probably haven't been in love before so he may attach to me not completely bc he likes me but bc he has no references: oooooooh
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aangsfrogs · 23 days
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I wonder how many lives I've lived in my dreams
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peapod20001 · 1 year
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Me: wow I’ve never been so alone in my life and everything is sad and my body is cold :,,(
*realizes I haven’t eaten in 10 hours*
Me: so anyways everything I’ve felt in the past hour and a half is fake
#vent#kinda a vent anyways. like I really was fucking IN IT for a bit there. but I’m just hungry lmao#anyways not an exaggeration or blown out of proportion but I really am the loneliest I’ve ever been! I don’t have friends to talk to every#day like I did in school. and I currently somewhat talk to like. 1 friend on here consistently :’) yea#pretty fucked up tbh. I used to talk to and interact with so many people. I noticed when I went back through my archive to tag posts#I am low key terrified to try and get close to friends again. something always goes wrong somewhere down the line. it’s practically#a pattern I recognize now. fucked up really. anyways what I have going on now isn’t following that pattern. and I’m putting every fiber of#my being towards not fucking up!! I’m scared to get close to people. what can I say#I will say I don’t feel. bad about this ig. not overly attached and not extremely distanced. I know how I am so this is good#mm. yeah. maybe I have some kind of trauma when it comes to friendships. idk. I’m usually good about being a decent human being and friend#I try at least. I’ve gotten better I hope. not perfect but. better#I wonder if they hate me. I acted out cus of my emotions and thoughts and feelings. and they hated it. so that must mean they hate me right?#I wish people would tell me when I do something wrong. or tell me the truth about how they feel. or why they do things. instead of silently#cutting me off and not telling me what I did. god fuck. I really need to eat this muffin before I start crying more Jesus. fuck.
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rinneverse · 6 months
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pspspsp,,, do you perhaps have a spare boothill thought or two ,, sfw or nsfw,,,
i most certainly do have a few spare boothill thoughts! mostly nsfw ( ¬‿¬) walk with me nonnie… heheheh this got a wee bit too out of hand and i dropped WAY more than a few thoughts (and i am also tipsy, so i apologize in advance if something doesn't make sense) regardless, i hope u rlly like this :3
cw. assorted boothill x f!reader thoughts, manhandling, biting, improper use of a lasso (bondage!), mentions of overstim, lack of stamina is a foreign concept to boothill, talk of cyborg dick and artificial cum, creampies. not proofread in the slightest if there are typos no there's not
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𓆩♡𓆪 the thing about boothill is how unafraid he is of manhandling you. while he's aware that humans are much more fragile than he, he knows your limits like the back of his hand and he knows what you can handle. you can take him like a big girl, can't you?
𓆩♡𓆪 he'll fold you in half, put you in all sorts of positions, toss you over his shoulder and pat your plush ass with a smug laugh. if you decide you want to ride him and get all tuckered out, thighs burning, the moment you're whining and babbling for his help he's already on it. big hands envelop your waist as he moves you to his whims.
𓆩♡𓆪 boothill likes to see you pleasure-drunk, entirely fucked out by the time he's done with you. he can go for as long as you need, baby; you just have to say the word. he can eat you out for hours, fuck you for double that, and still have enough energy to take care of you afterwards.
𓆩♡𓆪 cyborg sex has the potential to really get freaky tbh... he's definitely had chats with you about different 'attachments...' whatever you're into. he's definitely figured out which size makes you cum the most, and will indulge your every whim—especially when you shyly ask him "baby... can we go bigger?" (if he still had a human body, his dick would be rock fucking hard right now.) he's definitely looked into vibrating attachments. great heavens.
𓆩♡𓆪 SPEAKING OF attachments he's looked into: boothill has definitely found a way to creampie you. the tipping point for him deep diving into this was when you were just whinin' so pretty for him, begging for more, and you had let it slip that you wished so bad for him to be able to cum into you. lo and behold, he finds a solution and he surprises you by cumming deep in your aching cunt one night. the two of you definitely make a mess of your bedsheets by the end of the day (and you probably had the most earth-shattering orgasms you've ever had in your life).
𓆩♡𓆪 the day you finally asked him what his teeth would feel like, boothill's grinning like a maniac. he won't bite so hard that it hurts too much, but he knows how much you like the power he holds over you. sharp teeth sink into flesh, followed by a hot tongue that laves over the mark adoringly.
𓆩♡𓆪 another day he indulged you... there was one time he noticed you eyeing the lasso that hangs at his hips. he smiles wolfishly at you and asks, "like what you see, darlin'?" he's surprised when you shyly nod your head and look up at him with sweet doe eyes and asks if maybe... he'd consider using it in the bedroom?
𓆩♡𓆪 and oh, he did. he considered it maybe a little too hard (he jerked himself off far too many times that day). when the time came for him to use it on you, he was fiending. he ties your wrists to the bedposts and just goes to town, treating your cute body like a pretty little cum dump. he's definitely a big fan. especially when you can't run away from all the pleasure he wants to give you <3
𓆩♡𓆪 he doesn't look it, but i think he provides good aftercare. he knows how fragile the human body is firsthand: that's why he's a cyborg now. he'll take care of you. without fail, every time he's done with you, you're practically a puddle, exhausted and jelly-boned, and boothill is scooping you up into his metal arms. and yet despite the cool metal pressing against your flesh, you feel warm. maybe it's just the love pouring out of his every action, the way he treats your body with absolute reverence and adoration as he cleans you up and gets you ready for some rest.
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please don't repost on other platforms. rbs and comments are super appreciated ♡ !!
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Azriel with single mom reader? I feel like being a single mom in ACOTAR would be tricky as hell... reader comes from autumn court and flees to night court because she got pregnant out of marriage? 😯 the shame
Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Word count: ~950
Warnings: Nothing yet, maybe just a little angst
a/n: Okay I know this is a drabble but this is definitely getting more parts like I am attached to this storyline now and LOVE that you requested it 🤗
Read part two here
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You leaned against a pillar just outside the school, a twitch creeping up your hands until your fingers spasmed. You shoved them under the bend of your elbows, crossing your arms and biting into your lip. 
She was fine. 
She was more than fine—Velaris was safe. 
Anything would have been safer than facing your father’s wrath back in Autumn, but you had gotten extremely lucky with the timing of your escape. Falling pregnant with your daughter had not been in the cards, especially not after a single night of rebellion, but with Velaris’s doors opening up just days after your healer broke the news, something seemed to be written in the stars. 
But every day was still a gamble; your father could find you at any time. 
The past five years had been a miracle, if you were being honest. 
School was supposed to end two minutes ago. 
Your foot began to shake, popping your knee up and down and making your body vibrate with the anxiety that consumed you. 
You shouldn’t have let her go to school. 
Melanie only had a few friends—neighbor kids whose parents you had vetted extensively—but that had been enough for her to get the idea into her head. You had planned on homeschooling her, or at least waiting until she was a few years older before letting her out into the world. Unfortunately, that had not been Melanie’s plan, and Melanie had so many wonderful plans. As most five-year-olds did. 
Gods, what if—
“First day?” a rumbling voice made you pause your nervous fidgeting. The man spoke again. “If you’re worried, don’t be. The teacher is great. Just forgetful when it comes to time. They are typically a few minutes late every day.” 
You swallowed and turned around despite every voice in your head telling you not to. But those voices in your head were completely and utterly wrong about a multitude of things. Behind you, you found a man—an Illyrian—with wings an ungodly size and shadows swirling down his legs and onto a uniform pool along the ground. And he was gorgeous—unabashedly gorgeous in the most devastating way. 
You looked up from your blatant investigation of him, meeting his eye and stuttering out, “Oh. That’s… that’s good to know. Thank you.” 
If he noticed your stutter, he didn’t make any sign of it. Instead, the man with the wings and the shadows blinked several times, furrowed his brows, and took a step back as if to steady himself. Perhaps, if you weren’t a bundle of unreasonable nervous energy, you would have found his actions strange, but you were. So you simply offered him a superficial, airy laugh and uncrossed your arms. 
“I—” the man began, but he seemed to lose his train of thought, a heat traveling up his cheeks in a way that looked foreign. “I’m Azriel.” 
Oh, wonderful. Introductions. 
You tried your hardest to stay very far away from very many people. It was the best way to keep yourself hidden. You couldn’t avoid the neighbors, and you supposed you couldn’t avoid fae like Melanie’s teacher, but this was different. 
Shit. 
You offered your name, anyway, afraid of appearing too outlandish in an otherwise casual setting. 
It would be fine. 
This was fine. 
Azriel repeated it in a breathless way, but then the school bell rang and something seemed to click in his brain. The small smile that had curled up the corner of his mouth became hard and he shot his eyes quickly one way and then the other, inspecting your surroundings. 
Maybe this wasn’t fine. 
“Are you a new mom in the area?” Azriel asked. 
All of your nerves shifted to guarded unease. “I am,” you offered, not caring if it was almost a lie. 
“The moms here don’t usually do the pick ups alone.” 
“You’re doing a pick up alone, it seems.” 
“I’m picking up my nephew,” Azriel explained, relaxing his posture, making himself smaller, seemingly gauging the building tension. “I didn’t mean to come across—I just asked because the mothers here typically have help. From their mates or partners. From the father.” 
You bit the inside of your cheek, your next words tumbling out before you could catch them. “Well, I’m alone.” 
Double shit. 
Azriel seemed to let out a breath, his shadows whipping around along the ground. 
You braced yourself for further questioning, for the judgments that would surely follow, but then you were attacked from behind by a pair of arms wrapping around your knees. You turned quickly, scooping your daughter into a hug and promptly dismissing any further conversation with the stranger. 
“Hi, Mel,” you smiled, tucking her hair back as you subtly looked her over. “How was school? Did you like it?” 
“I loved it!” she excitedly replied. She rambled on a bit more after that, retelling her day by the minute. 
You felt eyes on you the entire time. A small boy had run and jumped into Azriel’s arms in your peripheral, but even as the boy talked and talked just as Melanie did, you felt the occasional glance your way. And some of Azriel’s shadows had to be reigned in multiple times, the small wisps licking at your ankles. 
The teacher suddenly spoke up and you were eavesdropping, straining your ears to listen in on her greeting towards the Illyrian.
“Oh, Azriel, lovely to see you. We were hoping the High Lady would be picking Nyx up, but this is even better. There is a showcase in a few weeks that—” 
You felt your world freeze. 
High Lady. 
You had been speaking to someone in close relation to the Night Court. You let someone know your name, told them you were alone with a child, and they had direct access to the High Lord and Lady. 
You whisked Melanie into your arms despite her protests and beelined it home. 
Shit. 
part two
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ltleflrt · 6 months
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Figuring out I'm on the ace spectrum was so difficult because I have always been a horny bitch. I knew what sex was at a fairly young age, because I'd asked my mom and she's one of those good parents who'll answer questions like those, and as I grew older and would ask more complex questions, her answers would evolve along with my curiosity and understanding of the world. And I remember having fantasies as young as 9 or 10 years old, even if they were hella vague and nothing close to what sex actually is lol
So as I became a teenager, and all my friends' focus turned from playing with dolls to flirting with boys, I automatically thought I was attracted to boys. And I paid more attention to Cute Boys than I did to Cute Girls, because girls were just nice to look at while boys were People To Have Crushes On. Because of heteronormativity. Looking back on it now, I know there were girls I liked to stare at just as intently as boys, although less often because I wasn't trying to pay attention. And I certainly didn't fantasize about girls because I started reading romance novels in 5th grade, so I was fantasizing about male romantic partners because that was the fiction I was consuming. I didn't even realize fantasizing about girls was possible until I was 17, and I had a few "am I a lesbian" internal crises for years because of it.
So when I did start having sex, I had A LOT OF IT with SO MANY different guys, and eventually a couple of women once I started accepting that bisexuality was real. But it was never really fulfilling. Not like my fantasies were. Not like my books were. I was slutty because sex was fun, I was horny, there were plenty of options so I kept searching for that satisfaction I was craving.
Getting married was a relief (even though it turns out I'm aro-spec too lol) because I was tired of hunting, and even if sex with my husband was meh, at least I had someone around to scratch that itch if I had it, and he didn't mind if I occasionally took care of things on my own because I'd read an especially hot scene in a romance.
I learned about asexuality in my early 20s, but I brushed it off. Couldn't be me, I'm far too horny for that. But I think that comes from the fact that everything you hear about Aces is attached to sex-repulsion or sex-indifference. I wasn't either of those things. I was horny all the dang time. I was fantasizing about sex all the dang time. I figured actual sex was meh because my imagination was so vivid that real life could never match up. Which could be true to an extent, but I think not as much as popular opinion would have us believe. If fantasy was really that much better for everyone, then I think we'd have less incels and unplanned pregnancies than we do.
In my 30s I finally saw people talking about The Spectrum, and I started examining my past, and I figured out I wasn't really attracted to anyone I had sex with. I do occasionally find someone attractive; there are men and women and enbies who make my skin feel tight and give me a little wave of lightheadedness lol... but it's always always the fantasy that gets me really going. If given the opportunity I wouldn't have sex with any of those people. Thank you, but no thank you, I'd rather just imagine it than physically participate in the act with them.
(Ok I might go down on them, but that's less about wanting sex, and more about being able to add them to my Tally. Hell yeah I want to brag about making *insert hot person* have an orgasm. There's PRIDE in that kind of accomplishment lol)
I have a lot of respect for aces that are not horny. I understand it even if I don't share the sentiment. And I feel like most of them understand me even if they don't share the sentiment. There's a solidarity between us.
Until I go into a fandom tag for a character that the aces have glommed onto because they're canonically ace or headcanoned as ace. Good lord, the non-horny aces can turn into downright vicious bastards if a horny ace sexualizes their blorbo.
This post is for them.
Horny aces exist. Please look up "autochorissexual, lithosexual, and aegosexual."
Refer to those definitions in regards to romantic attraction as well as sexual attraction.
Some aces may not fall into one of those definitions, because asexuality is a spectrum, but they may still be horny.
Horny aces are not disrespecting you by enjoying being horny on main. We promise we'll wash the stickiness off our hands before we hold your hands in queer solidarity.
And most importantly: Your blorbo is fictional and does not need to be defended from icky sexuality. They exist in an infinite multiverse, so your blorbo and my blorbo are not the same, even if they appear to be on the surface.
AND:
This post is also for the people who are confused about themselves because they're horny but don't actually feel attraction. You're not crazy, you're not wishy washy, you're not "waiting for the right person to come along" (unless you are, in which case I hope you find them). You're just a thin strip of color on a massive rainbow that holds more unique shades than anyone can perceive at a glance.
You're valid. You're one of us too.
And don't be mean to the non-horny aces. Tag your smut so they can avoid it. (But actually so I can find it lol)
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