#and i can't call either of my parents bc of the stupid *******

[thetraingotsetonfireonmidnight]

Todoroki x m reader who has really powerful quirk (maybe something like wanda from marvel?). What would endeavour think about shoto dating a guy? Would he liked it bc reader has a good quirk?

That's a good question 👀 I had to rewrite a lot of this cause it didn't save.

𝔗𝔬𝔡𝔬𝔯𝔬𝔨𝔦 𝔵 𝔪!𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯 𝔴𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔚𝔞𝔫𝔡𝔞'𝔰 𝔓𝔬𝔴𝔢𝔯𝔰

Endeavor is one of those parents who acts supportive but is still heavily questioning it on the inside.

He always imagined Shoto would grow up to marry a woman and have children to pass his quirk onto.

Emphasis on the part about wanting grandchildren who have powerful quirks.

So the idea of Shoto being with a guy kinda ruins that (unless you're afab, but don't bother trying to explain that to him because his old ass won't understand).

At first he assumed you and Shoto were rivals of some sort.

Whenever Shoto said he was going to hang out with you, he pictured you two sparring or something.

In reality, you two were going on dates.

Shoto doesn't even bother hiding the fact that he loves you, he's open about it. His father is just stupid.

It doesn't matter how obvious he is about it—

"I really like him, he's extremely handsome and charming."

"I can't tonight father, y/n and I are going out."

"I really admire him. I couldn't imagine a world without him."

—his dad just doesn't catch on.

Shoto doesn't go to his dad for dating advice either, he goes to Fuyumi.

She was a bit surprised to find that Shoto was crushing on a boy, not a girl, but either way she was supportive and gave him some advice.

You were a bit stand offish.

You agreed to go on the dates, and it was clear that you reciprocated his feelings, but something was pushing you away.

Todoroki eventually asked you about it.

"If it's something I'm doing, you can tell me."

You nervously scratch your arm, and open your mouth to speak-

But unfortunately, you scratching your arm made Todoroki panic.

"Oh no, did I make you injure your arm as well? I knew I was the hand crusher, I don't understand why I'm cursed to be this-"

How can someone be so smart, yet so stupid?

You calm him down, assuring him that your arm was not injured.

You were just nervous because of your quirk.

It was powerful, and you were grateful for that, but there had been too many close calls where you lost control. You were worried about hurting him.

Todoroki listened to you rant for a bit, before stopping you.

"I know what it feels like to reject a part of yourself, it's only going to hold you back. You need to make the quirk your own in order to control it. I can always help you, if you want."

"But—"

"Y/N...I could never be scared of you."

After that night, your walls started going down, and you two became official.

Fuyumi, wanting to finally meet you, invited you over for dinner.

Natsuo couldn't make it, so it was only you, Shoto, Fuyumi, and Endeavor.

"Dad, this is my boyfriend—"

Endeavor spits out his water- "BOYFRIEND?!"

"That's what I said."

Endeavor then tries to explain that he wants grandchildren.

Todoroki reminds him that he's still only in high school, so having children isn't even on the table right now.

Endeavor tries to save himself by saying in the future, he wants grandchildren.

Todoroki argues that they shouldn't be worried about that right now.

This keeps going back and forth.

The night ends, and Fuyumi is embarrassed on her father's behalf.

She sends you off with left over food as an apology.

After that, Endeavor tries to be accepting towards it.

He's trying to be a better father, and being supportive of his son's choices is a part of it.

And he's glad that you have a strong quirk at least.

It's just that in his eyes, you're competition because of how powerful you are.

He wants Shoto be the next number one, and you could possibly be a threat to that.

Either way, Todoroki brings you over for dinner often just to annoy his father.

[remnants]

thots about tommy wayne under the cut 👇🏾😚👍🏾

ok so in my head he's not from gotham lol (my guy is east coast mean, which is pretty mean, but not gotham mean which translates to being the sweetest guy on earth once you’re within the city limits). he's the illegitimate and son of patrick wayne and his daddy wouldn't claim him bc the affair/one-night-stand/whatever-you-wanna-call-it happened while he was very much married (fuck this guy fr!) and his wife was very much pregnant (oh brother this guy STINKS!!!). anywayyyy elizabeth mitchell isn’t stupid and knows a fight she can't win when she sees one so she leaves gotham for new york when the test comes back positive and patrick won’t pick up her calls.

and things are going good! she's made a little name for herself as a local nightclub singer and she's got a job waiting tables during the day that makes good money and sure things were a little touch and go for a while and sure there were times where she was sure that they weren't gonna make it but she got her baby through school (he graduated valedictorian btw) and now he's in the first year of his pre med undergraduate degree at the local university on a full scholarship (her parenting HER parenting).

so imagine her surprise when the billionaire deadbeat of the hour shows up on her doorstep one day talking about family duty and lines of succession.

patrick amadeus wayne jr. is dead. dead dead dead. and while it wasn't really a surprise to anyone with eyes (weak lungs can only take so many wet gotham winters and the tabloids were saying that the cough he sported at the latest gala sounded particularly nasty), he was by all appearances an only child (francesca wayne could barely get pj out let alone carry another baby to term) and the waynes were fumbling for someone to take his place before the body was even cold.

the transition is as rough as you would expect, what with the stony silences from his father’s wife (stepmother? who knows, not that either of them would ever acknowledge the relation) whenever they cross paths in the manor (francesca wayne never makes an outside appearance in gotham society again after the passing of her son. she enters a period of seclusion and never emerges, spending her days wandering the halls in mourning blacks and lighting candles in prayer), and sometimes being called patrick or pj by the gotham upper class (intentionally or not. though he suspects intentionally because his mother’s side of the family got the monopoly on his looks). it’s very obvious that he doesn’t fit in but hey, free college is free college and his mama is gonna be set for life if he can just see this through.

of course the whole thing doesn’t go over well (a long lost father suddenly appearing on your doorstep and claiming you only because his other kid died would put most people off to be completely fair) but after some yelling and screaming and haggling, compromises are made. in exchange for thomas moving to gotham and being prepped to take over as head of wayne enterprises, his mother is also to be put up in a fancy brownstone on the upper east side and given enough in allowance (in addition to the 18 years of child support she never got) so that she never has to work again and thomas is to be allowed to continue his studies, graduate medical school (in gotham and not at john hopkins like he planned. rip it was literally his dream school), and become a doctor (i like to think becoming a doctor was solely a thomas wayne endeavor. all the wayne men before him were men of business and trade but tommy has wanted to help people his entire life and he’ll be damned if he lets his father keep him from following his dreams). there’s a handshake and signatures signed on a drawn-up contract (because patrick wayne doesn’t do anything by halves and of course he brought the family lawyer to meet his son after 19 years of pretending he didn’t exist) and thomas goes from a two-bedroom apartment in hell’s kitchen to a bedroom the same size (and then some) right outside of gotham city.

and he does see it through, very well in fact! thomas wayne graduates top of his class in undergrad at gotham university as well as in medical school, is granted a residency at gotham general, and eventually becomes the head of surgery. Along the way, he meets a girl named martha, gets married, and has a beautiful baby boy named bruce (after his maternal grandfather ofc) and the rest is history!

[raayllum]

this isn't how i'm writing it in fanon s6 bc i can pace things however i want with zero time constraints but this is something i could see s6 doing + i like being self indulgent so

They'd been stupid to trust the Celestial Elves.

It was the only thought running through Callum's brain as he stared in horror, the corona sealed back glass, the Nova Blade a weapon no mortal could wield, and Rayla—

On her knees, the leader holding an ordinary but no less terrifying blade to her throat, his face still a bit scraped up from his and Rayla's earlier scuffle. She'd been the one to catch the elf reaching for Callum's bag when they slept that night; she'd be the one to draw her sword first and engage him, quickly overwhelmed by the time Callum and her parents had arrived.

They were all talented warriors, but rusty after two years in a coin—Runaan unable to draw his bow with only one arm, and something long range was needed here. Some way to kill the leader and give Rayla time, even if he held her in a vice grip, pressing down hard enough on her throat there was thin, scarlet line growing.

"You have something we need, boy," the leader hissed, breathing heavily through a broken nose. "You know what it is."

Runaan's voice broke through, sharp and demanding—"What is he talking about?"—but Callum couldn't tear his eyes away from Rayla. She was struggling to breathe, let alone speak, but gave her head the barest shake. No.

"What are you going to do with it?" Callum says as neutrally as he can, stalling (there has to be a spell or a way out of this) even if he already knows the answer.

What else could they hope to do with something called the Key of Aaravos?

"I'll tell you what we're going to do your elf girl unless you give it so us," the Celestial elf snarls. "On the count of three, I'll slit her throat. One—"

"Stop!"

Two hadn't even left his lips, Callum having an excuse to look away from Rayla's glaring, tearshot eyes now as he digs the cube out of his bag. It feels like it weighs a thousand pounds as he holds it up.

On Finnegrin's ship, at least he'd been able to hide what he was doing—what he was willing to do—in the shadowy depths of the ship. Here, in the light, there's nowhere to hide.

Callum holds it out, taking a few steps closer. "Lower the sword first," he says.

"And have her wriggle free? I don't think so."

"Callum," she wheezes. "Don't—"

"Fine then," Callum snaps. "At the same time—an exchange. On my count of three. One—" He looses his grip on the cube, the ring of celestial elves watching eagerly. "Two—" It's not ideal, him and Rayla in front of where any of her parents could join the fray; there will have to be distance before anyone can fight either way. But then, he's not doing this out of the certainty he'll get the Key back, that it won't end in disaster.

Just for her safety. Just for himself, because he can't live without her.

This was his destiny, what Aaravos was banking on. And he was right.

"Three!"

The Celestial elf takes his blade away and shoves her forward at the same time Callum tosses the cube over. It's caught in one shiny blue hand, the elf towering over him as Callum slides to his knees, catching Rayla as she careens forward before she can hit the floor. She coughs weakly in his arms, bleeding at the throat, but it seems shallow.

The celestial elves make it maybe five five away with their prize before her parents leap into action, swords clashing, but Callum grabs his staff and constructs a funnel of wind around him and Rayla, a thick enough wall of air to keep anyone else out momentarily, as he helps her sit up.

"Callum." She's crying, but alive.

"Let me look at you," he murmurs, lifting up her chin. He uses his scarf to wipe away the blood, relieved when more doesn't follow. A shallow cut just to scare him, but it'd worked. He pulls her into his arms next, just needing a moment to feel her heart beating against his.

She takes a second to hold him back and then does so, tightly, and his heart settles as they sit there shaking. She hasn't forgiven him for it yet, maybe—but she will.

[dawndelion-winery]

Have googled images, y'all gonna get my pre-gaming impressions of them based on a single googled image of each and nothing else

Rafayel

What the hell is lemuria? Some ape typa species??

Oh my god he's an artist am I gonna be the one paying the bills? Horrible. Can't believe y'all would tell me a broke man reminds y'all of Ajax. Idk what an evol is ig it's like the zodiac thing in which case um,,,I actually don't know what it means bc horoscopes have no significance to me but I'm guessing it means he's like,,,either very spiteful and sassy, or incredibly spirited and energetic.

Xavier

Oh my god it's Gepard 2.0 hello 👀 wdym age unknown omg is he like a dragon or sth omg it's giving immortal knight captain

What the fuck is a deepspace hunter are you some kind of fancy astronaut mercenary? Light evol,,,fits him ig, if he's anything like Gepard he's some soft responsible type. He looks like I could take him home to my parents except we gonna have to say he's a priest or sth.

Zayne

A FUCKING CARDIAC SURGEON oh my god what a NERD. "As the cosmos dances-" ☝️🤓 ok, grandpa. What an ick. Ice?? Edgy Elsa?? Some ice prince wannabe oh my god I hate everything he stands for. Pretentious looking ass, he looks like he's going to call me a stupid klutz for spilling water on the floor.

But also he's probably the richest of the three😭😭 BUT I CANNOT BE BOUGHT (I can, someone tell me his salary)

[the-priestess-of-dawn]

thinking abt ur validar post because i actually thought about that a little in my stupid werewolf fic. I had to really sit down and be like "what the fuck would people even FIND attractive about this guy enough to have a baby" and I didnt wanna just use the occult angle and it hit me that Validar isn't self-caring because he hates he's not the vessel he wanted and yeah he definitely IS the equivalent of That Parent. You know the one. What I'm saying is maybe there's a commentary to be made here abt how the Plegian people and him in turn felt so dehumanized in general after a point even the extremist sects of Grimleal were better bc well, if you become food for Grima/BECOME Grima's body then you're useful and good and righteous. What gets me is Plegia isn't poor, either, but its poor in sustainability outside the ocean... idk, a lot of food for thought with Validar here. I didn't expect to think abt him in FEH so deeply but here we are.

Honestly it's kind of embarrassing how much I HAVE deeply thought about Validar. I've been wanting him to get into FEH for a long time now. A lot of his lines in Awakening are so poorly written that it's hard to make sense of him as a person. But even though you can't really argue that he's in any way sympathetic in the text... For me at least, there's no such thing as a completely unsympathetic villain, and I can't help feeling sorry for both him and the other members of the Grimleal...

I mean, yeah, when Aversa explains that Plegia suffering under Gangrel was useful because it drove the people to worship, I think we ARE supposed to feel bad for the common people. But I think it's easy to fall into a trap of trying to distinguish those ordinary citizens from the evil, manipulative leaders like Validar just a little bit too much. Aren't they all trapped in the same vicious cycle, in the end?

Over the course of the game, we occasionally fight some Grimleal enemies who are... really just nasty, and not supposed to be given a second thought at all. But I can't help but be moved that they call out to Grima with their dying words... "Master Grima... my life force... is yours..." (Chalard, Chapter 8). "Lord Grima... Rain down... retribution..." (Jamil, Paralogue 6).

The Grimleal... love Grima. Even Validar loves Grima. Aversa says he's everything she knows of love, but she also doesn't presume he loves HER, so of course it's his devotion to Grima that she sees. Notably, it's this form of love that makes her content to die for him.

So I end up feeling deeply moved, even though (or more accurately, BECAUSE) the entire philosophy behind the Grimleal is so horrific. The deep despair these people must feel in order to see salvation in the form of humanity's destruction... It's NOT just "hee hee powerful dragon will make me powerful" because these people, including Validar, do not presume that they are special and going to survive. Even the leader of the Grimleal is nothing. Grima alone is everything.

And... okay I talk a lot about the symbolism of Grima's name meaning mask, which I love so much, but lately I've also been thinking about the meaning of their Japanese name, Gimurei—from Norse, Gimlé, referring to the place where the righteous will dwell in happiness after Ragnarok, which will stand "even when both heaven and earth have passed away." So... yes, I do think that for the Grimleal, giving their souls to Grima is a way of becoming righteous. The world is cruel and ugly but Grima will make it right :::)

(Of course, because they believe Grima is the only answer, no one does anything to make the world they have any better. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. One that Grima is drawn into as well. When this is what they wake up to, what are they supposed to do? If they don't destroy the world, they will be letting a LOT of people down.)

[theghostbunnie]

what's the worst camp camp fandom story you heard? or, what are some bad or wild ones?

You wanna see the longest lists of trigger warnings I've ever written? here we go

TW: ⚠️R*pe, S*lf H*rm, S*icide, Pregnancy, Violence, death, Gr*oming, Abuse, all mentions⚠️ hopefully I'm not forgetting anything

I was recently told a story about this person who was stuck in a ongoing roleplay(s) that just kept getting worse and worse. It involved Max, trans FTM teenager involved with Snake but he was abusive and they were constantly cheating on each other and Max had multiple children with him, Preston, had other partners even. Snake had children with Erin. Alot of it was Max facing alot of abuse and troubles, and physical bullying at school even while pregnant. There was always either a baby on the way or a newborn. David kicked Max out for being a teen parent, turned to alcoholism, Max was constantly going back to Snake, abandoning the kids. David being mad at Max despite doing the same thing. Gwen acted like David, accidentally crashed the car into a hospital with the main cast inside. Snake kidnapped a baby with no consequences. I was just appalled reading them telling me this.

Then there's like the typical "here's like 5 artists that got popular then called out for drawing werid shit of kids or doing werid shit to kids" heard a lot of those stories. Recently had to leave a server bc another one came out, jfc.

I don't have the attention span for fics but I've heard of some from other people that're like "Daniel 🍇 ing David but David is still in love with him," "Jasper 🍇ing David and Daniel comes and kills him and saves David" "Gwen abusing David and Daniel kills her and saves him" I group read a fic when Wattpad was getting streamed on a discord call and it mentioned Nikki Neil and Max all had cellphones and Max decided to run away bc his mom was kinda rude to him and made him do some chores and he's like "I can't take this anymore" and told his friends to runaway with him without actually telling them what they were doing and they weren't even missing for 24 hours and none of their parents called them but it hit the news and the news/even Max's father making a statement was like "yeah Max probably kidnapped those other kids" LIKE HE AIN'T TEN YEARS OLD AND MISSING HIMSELF 😭 the fic was probably written by someone very young along time ago so I don't wanna dig into it too hard but omg

Personal experiences I have are like, on Kik actually when I was first in this fandom my only exposure was basically a public chat on Kik and then later amino. Max fangirls had little to no boundaries with Max RPers and I had a problem saying no as a kid so it got me into some wacky adventures!!/neg

Like a problem we had in that GC was people coming in with their OCs and like the most openly triggering backstories ever speaking on them loudly and like making their OCs cut n stuff and a friend I had at the time literally blew a fuse and basically told them "you are RUINING my one safe space do you srsly have to bring that in the RP"

We had a Nerris RPer who would make her have full violent breakdowns and I don't even remember all the details but it got so bad and us being all young and stupid tried to handle it THROUGH RP IN CHARACTER TO AVOID DIRECT CONFLICT 😭 I remember Rping as Nerris' parents getting called to pick her up and take her back home bc she couldn't control herself. It made things worse.

This one person had an OC who was Daniel's and David's baby they found in a dumpster and throughout the course of that RP they kept ageing her up and she went from being a baby herself to being a teenage mom of two. I remember my friend rping as the social service worker who came and took her kids after I had Max call her in.

Same OC did the "storming off dramatically" thing and I tried to be nice and have Max follow her and they had her respond "turns around with a bow and arrow and shoots you directly in the eye and doesn't miss" and jasper and Gwen got their date interrupted to take Max to a hospital and recon that it ALMOST* got his eye bc he would've IMMEDIATELY DIED realistically.

On amino there was this one max fangirl RPer even my current friend now had a run-in with and at the time I had even heard stories about how she would go into group RPs and cause a stir.

Like wanting Max to date her and when he refused she killed herself and then started rping as her OCs brother and berating and harassing Max for "killing his sister"

She joined MY rp once and I panicked bc I always delt with things THROUGH my character or ignoring it. But this RP was a personality swap and Max was a really sweet kid and she always wanted to be right on his hip, trying to interact with him.

So I made him, (who was currently in the mess hall attic) fall through the ceiling and onto a table so I didn't have to talk to her OC

[roseapothecary]

15 questions, 15 mutuals

Thanks for the tags, @stereopticons

1. Are you named after anyone?

I chose my alias in part for my dad, but my parents named me after my mom's favorite aunt. I didn't get to know her (she died very young), but I hear she was pretty cool.

2. When was the last time you cried?

This morning lol.

3. Do you have kids?

Nah. I like kids, but I especially like them when I get to give them back to their parents at the end of the day. Under the right circumstances, though, I wouldn't be opposed to co-parenting.

4. What sports do you play/have played?

I have never heard of a sport.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Often... especially as a coping mechanism for being sad or stressed. Why be sincere when you can be funny?

6. What's the first thing you notice about people?

I think the best way to phrase this is, like... how they carry themselves. Do they seem confident? Insecure? Nervous? Shy? Outgoing? I tend to match people's energies and try to make them feel comfortable, so this is a big part of that.

7. What’s your eye color?

Hazel

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

I mean, if I have to choose... I choose happy endings, BUT I don't really see why that has to be a dichotomy...

9. Any talents?

I can sing very well, and I can act. I won't call myself a triple-threat because, tbh, choreography is not my strong suit. I've got the rhythm but I am always on the wrong foot lmao. My theatre teacher in high school would very often yell, "OTHER FOOT [REDACTED]!" I also know a lot of random facts about stupid shit because I have a talent for absorbing information (and I will go full-on Stevie Ruins Everything if you let me... which I guess is both a talent and an annoyance). I'm also a speed reader with high comprehension.

10. Where were you born?

Houston, Texas (baby).

11. What are your hobbies?

Writing, reading, theatre, word puzzles, some light gaming

12. Do you have any pets?

I have two dogs.

13. How tall are you?

5'5 and a half

14. Favorite subject in school?

Theatre and chorus, if those count. If not, English.

15. Dream job?

I very frequently fantasize about quitting everything and opening up either a doggie daycare or this café/art gallery that lives in my brain — or a café that does coffee and pastries in the morning, but wine/beer and desserts in the evenings with, like, open mic nights and other things like silly painting classes and whatever.

Tagging: @sarahlevys @landofsonlali @schitthappens @lilythesilly @hagface @maxbegone @schittposting @sunlightsymphony @rosedavid @danieljradcliffe @jddryder @stuckwityou @scullyblr @inexplicablymine @notspecialbabe @designatedgrape

That's actually 16 bc I can't count. Whatever. 😂

[icedmetaltea]

Health anxiety: something is wrong Me: no dude lol you're being dramatic everything is fine Body: randomly develops a nut allergy (?) Body: blood pressure consistently 130-150/80-110 at night for some reason Body: suddenly can't tolerate yogurt- including lactose free Body: Mysteriously loses 1-2 lbs per week when not on diet past month Body: constant anxiety even when not pmsing Health anxiety: come on man Me: EVERYTHING IS FINE EVERYTHING IS FINE EVERYTHING IS FINE WE'RE DEFINITELY NOT GETTING CANCER OR HEART DISEASE OR ANYTHING AHAHAHAHAHAHA

(incoherent venty stuff below, tw for suicidal thoughts and just... idk weird psychosis type stuff ig)

I can't even go to the doctor cause agoraphobia and like... even then they just blame everything on anxiety. Even when my BP is this erratic, anywhere from 110/60-156/110, and I can't make a telehealth appointment for some goddamned reason that they won't explain

And I don't know if they'll sign that form so I can get ebt and ya know not starve (I sent it via email but I got said email from a static-filled call so I don't even know if it's the right address or if they'll do it digitally)

And from the sounds of things they won't make me a note to file for a tuition appeal so I'll be saddled with a $700 fine that'll go to collections if I can't pay it by december WHEN I HAVE $600 IN MY BANK and I need it to pay for basic living essentials till I can get approved for SSI IF I even can which will take at LEAST 6 months

and everything adds up, toothepaste, paper towels, laundry soap, dish soap, sponges, trashbags, pads... the list goes on and it adds up so fast

And nobody aside from the therapist has shown any goddamned empathy for me when I've made calls, it reaaaally feels like the doctors and nurses just hope I kill myself, cause it'd be easier for them, cause I'm a burden, cause it's easier for me to die than for them to make me a telehealth appointment or sign a goddamned 1-paper form so I can fucking feed myself and not be saddled with debt

it'd be so much easier for everyone

I've been thinking about blowing my brains out all day. it used to be just when I was pmsing but it's been pretty much all month when my imaginary friend isn't distracting me with stupid shit and/or age regressing to cope

I just think, sure the gun would be expensive but then I wouldn't have to worry about money anymore, or panic attacks, or being a financial burden to my mom, or being a disappointment, or PMDD, or sleeping till 4pm when the depression gets bad, or anything

Nothing at all. Just blackness. Or maybe there's something after death, idk. Maybe I'm going to heaven or hell, but either way hopefully things just... are different there. No more capitalism. No more mental health shit. No more jobs and school and people working just to work and then die, no more of your worth getting judged by how smart you are or how valuable you are as a wage slave

No more heart pounding, no more gasping for air for the 20th time as I try to sleep, no more walking around in dreams where I feel like a ghost (and yet I look forward to it bc at least it's... different. It's somewhere than isn't here) no more waking up disappointed that I even woke up

No more thinking about how my parents are gonna die someday and then I'll really be alone

No more thinking about how my sibling left me

No more thinking about how my best friend left me

No more anything

I don't expect to make it to the end of this year. I don't know when I'll do it but it's kinda a given. I should've just let myself freeze to death back in December like I'd originally planned. At least I could die to something I loved. Why'd I bother sticking around? What have I gained? I'm just living to live

What, to finish all those books? I have hundreds, I'll never finish them all

To finish that game? I'll never finish that either

To get on SSI? I probably won't even be approved before trump takes power (be honest with yourself, you know he will. A war's coming and it ain't lookin good for people like us. He wants people like us dead)

It's so dark and lonely tonight. I have a billion thoughts in my head and it's supposed to be better now bc it's not my luteal or follicular phase... I can't even have the one good week I'm supposed to have PMDD-wise

I just can't stop thinking about how much better everything would be without me. And idk I feel kinda in a way like said imaginary friend is like... idk shutting down my body somehow. Cause even they know it's for the best. I know that's just psychosis brain talking cause they're not real but at times like these I wonder

But man, I wish if that was the case they'd make it quick and painless. A gun would be easier, just saying. Oh but it'd be too loud, make too much of a mess, blah blah blah... it's quick and effective. Sure it might not work and turn me into a vegetable. Prolly wouldn't though. It works more often than hanging/blood loss/jumping. I know they don't want me gone but even they have to admit it's about time. They've known it for a long time. I should've frozen to death. It would've been quick in 0 degree weather. We could've listened to music. Mom and dad wouldn't have found us till morning.

But no. Just had to chicken out

Ugh

[runin-reads]

Hello! I just read Cheers to Teenage stupidity and loved it! Also saw a post saying that if we had ideas we could tell you, and I do have few I thought let's share it.

Not sure how you're planning to do with the full moon but my HC is that if you're pregnant you can't turn into an animagus bc the baby could get hurt and your magic doesn't want that; and I also think that James wouldn't play Quitdditch bc that sport is filled with brutal injury, and bc James isn't playing Sirius is the captain bc James trusts no one else with the team. So this scene hit me:

Where either the other marauders are gone due to the full moon or maybe James is sick so decided to not go to a prefect meeting last minute and Sirius is down at the pitch and Peter doing HW or something like Remus knows but is at the meeting and the other two don't know; so either of these scenarios and James is alone in the dorm and he starts over-thinking stuff and suddenly it hits him that he'll be a parent and starts worrying, and also is super bored which is kinda the reason he is over-thinking in the first place and then he starts feeling guilty for not being there with the others on the full moons bc obv they're getting more hurt now that there's no prongs and he's thinking all of this and feeling bad and guilty and Sirius walks in amd makes him feel better.

I don' know this thought j hit me and it seems possible

Anyway once again the fic is great!

Great idea! I really like your thoughts on James feeling left out of their usual adventures. I think it would make him reconsider a lot of things and think more deeply about the reality of his impending fatherhood. Talk about a wake up call haha

[saul-okayman]

This is my LONG vent about everything which I should prob not post

We have had big fights and I made sacrifices too, like during COVID I went to his country on a tourist visa to stay together. But we were leaving country A (where we met) and I had to go to my home Country B Before going to Country C

And I had to isolate for 2 full weeks, so ovb I wanted to be with my family after that, I either spent a month out of isolation or 2 weeks before leaving for COuntry C. And then He was mad when I left for 6 weeks (2 isolation and 4 w family) around Christmas time.

Then he did 3 years with me in Country B

There was one incident In country C where we went to a new take out restaurant to get food for us, and his sister (plus her wife) BEFORE the grandparents birthday.

The food took forever, and took so long that he came into the restaurant, yelled at me before leaving. I was tearing up and the server had to keep asking of I was okay. I get the food and we keep fighting in the car, he keeps yelling, I'm crying and yelling back. In a fit of rage he tries to throw out the snack I bought him out the window. I stop crying when we get to his sister's house.

We open the food, see they forgot to pack an item, and I immediately start sobbing. AND WE STILL GO TO HIS GRANDPARENT'S BIRTHDAY? AND I FORGIVE HIM IN THE SAME DAY????

That was the first and only time something like that happened in the past 5 years but I still immediately forgave him.

I have a problem with cleaning, where I just CAN NOT bring myself to do it, out of sight, out of mind, if I do not have a list I will get overwhelmed and not do it, but I have been getting better. he cleans the kitchen every day for an hour BUT 80% if those dishes are his. When he was gone for a week-long work trip thing, I ran the dishwasher maybe twice.

One night I didn't do any cleaning and he flipped out and threw my earrings down the hall. They didn't break (thank god) and he apologized once before back to being mad about the cleaning.

I just feel like I dealt with so much of his mental illness that I forget people do actually break up over that. The anxiety, depression, and intrusive thoughts occurred when I went home for Christmas (6 weeks away) and he basically isolated himself from everyone. I feel like I have done SO MUCH to support him.

At first when my prof who tells students not to go for a PhD in sociology told ME she sew the drive in me to get one, he was like "great lets go where is best for you while I focus on my career" (as he has a PhD), then its "A PhD can not happen for you now bc I have mine and I can't let it go cold" and then "I'll move anywhere for your masters" to "Please only apply to masters in Provence A" to now which is "Only the big city ones I will go to because I can't like in an isolated small town, and I actually just want to go home, ie back with my parents I do not want any of this."

he's mad because I diden't immensely pick the university in a big city. That I would consider one in a small city. Huge yelling fights about how I am selfish and thinking of me and not US as a couple. And now that I;m holding him back from any job with his PhD.

I tried to explain why I still want to think about small city uni bc they REALLY want me to attend, keep talking about my research interests, and I am FLATTERED. I think they're stupid at times but I AM FLATTERED. I told him, he was sad over that and understood then called me manuplitive for that.

When I'm mad, I'm mad and want nothing to do with a person. He is flip-flopping from saying "I love you, we're not going to break up." to "You're a self-obsessed monster and I have to lie to myself that I am happy in this city and lie to myself about how you act sometimes."

I asked if he still wanted me to kiss him when he went to work today, and he said yes, then after told me he was lying to himself and he did not want one but did not want me to be sad. Is if he did not call me a "shellfish bitch" this morning.

it's just SO hot and cold. Making me cry last night and once I'm in bed, telling me how he wished he could meet his grandfather and talk about politics. Took a (would be funny of not fighting) photo of me when I fell asleep mid duolingo last night and sent it to me.

He goes to Country C on Sunday night or Monday am for a trip he booked a while back. Maybe he'll just return to get his stuff.

What hurts most is he wants to keep our cat.

[lexi-the-demon-69]

Nah what in tarnations goin on with the anti-LicoPom shippers these days

Personally I don’t ship those two, but I wouldn’t call myself an anti-LicoPom person. my personal hcs of the two just wouldn’t make the ship work, but ya don’t see me lunging at somebody full speed right at the jugular because they ship the two

Who in their right mind comes after someone bc they ship two adult characters? (that aren’t related to each other, mind you) (Side note: Going by the idea that Licorice is in his 20s and Pomegranate is in her 30s, why would an age gap be wrong, if they are both adults? My parents are literally 11 years apart💀)

I dont think either characters are absolute saints. They’re cookies of darkness, for crying out loud! Of course they’re not gonna be amazing people,,, or cookies?

Like if that one anon wanted to discuss why they disagreed with a ship, sure whatever, but when it turns to name-calling and pointing fingies? That immediately ruins the argument.

Anyway point of what im yapping on about is that people who ship stuff gotta be less passive-aggressive towards others when they disagree with other people’s ships/opinions. Like we’re all apart of the same fandom, can’t we all just get along and set different opinions aside? Or is there something I’m just not getting?

One thing I will never understand is ship discourse. My brain has too many debuffs lmao

Hope you have a nice day, your blog and art look very nice! 😄💕

I honestly have to agree! Coming after and attacking me for liking a ship, instead of having a nice conversation with me, is stupid. Hell, I've had a better conversation with a ChocoMilk shipper and I hate that ship. (You know who you are and thanks for explaining your side of the story!) I am more than willing to have someone explain why they don't ship the things I do, as long as they're nice and civil about it. But, if you're gonna call me names and attack me as a person, then I'm going to pull your pants down and spank you with my opinions on why you're wrong.

One thing I forgot to mention is this: Pomegranate showing interest in Dark Enchantress doesn't mean LicoPom can't work. Besides, Pome x Dark Enchantress is more disgusting than LicoPom because that genuinely seems toxic and illegal.

Pome x Dark Enchantress is a toxic ship because there's obviously a power imbalance and you cannot tell me that Dark Enchantress wouldn't manipulate or ab*se Pome in that relationship if she did something wrong. Pome is a devoted follower of Dark Enchantress and, just like all of the other members (except Dark Choco) holds her in such high regard that they will do ANYTHING for her. Just goes to show how fucking hypocritical that anon is and how dumb Antis can be sometimes.

I have unfortunately dealt with antis before (if you've known me since my Henry Stickmin days, then you'll know.) and the best way to deal with them is to spank them with their own argument and block them.

I honestly don't get ship discourse either bro. None of this is real. It's a fictional relationship where I can project myself onto a character who will more than likely think I'm a weirdo.

Also, glad you like my art! I hope you enjoy your stay!

[stabbyfoxandrew]

Hi Aerie, happy Saturday :)🌈 if you want to participate and answer, may I ask some autumnal questions? (https://www.tumblr.com/stabbyfoxandrew/729840970044260352/autumnal-asks)

frost ~ lantern ~ cinnamon ~ fog ~ harvest ~ ghost

Ps.(I am grateful to be one of your 400 followers and read your AUs, they mean so much🥺🤍)

frost - if you could give some advice to your younger self, what would you say? 'get a job and gtfo of there!' lol :') also stuff like 'those people aren't your friends, find better ones' younger me knew that, but was afraid of being alone :')))

sorry these answers got LONG! i'm gonna put a break here

lantern - how did you meet your best friend? What were your first impressions of each other? okay so... my very best friend is my younger sibling! as for my other two closest friends, each of them (seperately) messaged me on here while i was having a Really Really Awful Time in my life (i won't give you my entire life story but it sucked a lot) and i thought they were both very sweet to check on me bc no one irl gave a shit lol

cinnamon - if you had to live in a time period different than the present, which would you choose and where? hmm... well, honestly, call me lame but i think i'd have liked to have been an adult in the late 90s, early 2000s. instead of ya know being in elementary school. i can't imagine going any further back and i don't wanna skip ahead either. i guess i would stay in my home town? i don't know where else i would be

fog - how well do you think you’d do in a zombie apocalypse scenario? oh baby i'm kms immediately! i'm not fuckin with that shit LMAO

harvest - what fictional character do you most identify with? Why? somehow every character i've ever read about disappeared from my head upon reading this. however, for the purpose of answering the question i'll pretend it's aftg characters only. and then i would say nicky i think. he's gay with unsupportive parents and basically raises his younger cousins while he's still a kid himself?? uh... hello. also i think he's a decent person he's just stupid and that's so me : )

ghost - is there someone that you miss having in your life? many. recently though, my granny (my mom's mom). but also i don't miss being around her bc she was sooo fatphobic and treated me like shit my whole childhood. :') i miss the good times we had though. a lot.

also that wasn't a question but thank you sooooo much! <3<3 i'm so glad you're here it makes me so happy to see you in my askbox every wipw!!! <3<33

🍂autumnal asks🍂

[rexaleph]

at least i called my parents abt it right away (they have extensive experience w this kinda work event) bc i can't get into it at work for a couple days anyway and needed to sort my thoughts out ahead of time, so when i fucking shattered my beloved 10ml rollerball of zara's waterlily tea dress in the course of the conversation i could immediately ask them to bring me a replacement when they visit again in october

It is shockingly beautiful, probably my actual favorite floral scent. Which, at the price that is super exciting especially bc it also lasts fairly well. Fresh, cool, delicate, i was really looking forward to wearing it in high summer after i got it last autumn. There are technically no floral notes, just mint, citrus and musk, however i 100% get white flowers, maybe a wet, green, pollen-laden lily. It's basically what i was looking for when i decided to get into flowers, a balance of naturalistic vegetal greenery and delicate prettiness. When people call it generic i feel like that comes from its subdued clean laundry detergent vibe, but i havent been able to find anything quite like it sold in bottles. Usually similar compositions are either all mint (ELDO you or someone like you) or all citrus (literally any bergamot cologne), pleasant but extremely flat and generic. And ofc designer florals tend to be sweet. Whereas here i couldn't pinpoint either mint or bergamot but just get a gentle overall impression of fresh flowers. Now ofc i am super unfamiliar with floral perfumes in general and maybe there is an elevated version of this out there, however why would i look for that if i have found my favorite at the stupid fast fashion store for 25 euros.

I kinda struggled against loving it for a bit bc i'm not hugely into the idea of jo malone or zara, but again, it's too cheap and good to be weird abt brands and like insist upon actually wanting to buy shit marked up by orders of magnitude. I have luxury cosmetics brain rot for sure but i do my best to fight it

[iwaasfairy]

Its ironic how if only rin has sae's ability and boldness to make a move physically on reader (but in a much less fckd up way) and sae has rin's ability to admit his feelings to himself (but not in an insecure way) we wouldnt be getting tears instead a dp from the itoshis dhsjks lmao, but in all seriousness though. i think the other has what the other lacks albeit both imperfectly. whenever sae calls out rin for being a "pervert" it almost seems like a self projection, a jab to himself, cus there's probably a part of him that wants to do what rin casually does to reader but he knows its wrong and if he does, its a self admittance that he does love reader romantically and he repulses that idea. So instead he puts up this nonchalant and obnoxious attitude as a facade about the two's level of intimacy for siblings. Whereas, rin's inferiority complex, definitely stifles the possibility of a romantic relationship with reader. He doesnt realize that him being the always physically present sibling puts him at an advantage, which he doesnt see, but sae does, which is why when sae snapped, he subtlety mentions it. But yeaa just some thots i have i may be completely wrong. Sorry for the long assss ask hahaha i just lovee ur fic fairy i couldnt help but analyze it a little dhsjs.

it briNGs me such a sense of joy that my silly little words have made a bit of an impact and you guys like and understand how i write theMM aaaaHHHQGDSfsut yes this is so accurate i think. v v bright analysis, i also think sae really struggles with the idea of being the "perfect, oldest child" but also having feelings for his sister that he cant ignore even though he wants to? but he also kinda wants to shove it to rin and to the parents so he can't really let go either,, and

rin kinda doesnt put that limit on himself bc he already thinks himself lesser than sae and trying to surpass him anyway. but he's so focused on not having what sae has with you that he doesnt see that he really is??? kinda had the upper hand the entire time? until sae snapped i guess aKDHcGgdthey're both jealous of what the other has!!! and !! that causes people to get huRTTT stupid boys stupid stupid boys

and doNT APOloGIZE for the thoughts pLS i loVe it so mUCh i dOOOO thank you for the ask and for liking the fic :')) i crY

[papirouge]

When I talk about radblr/rightblr fence sitters I mean people like missouriangothic. She was a really cynical person who loved targeting religious people once she got bored with being a conservative and thought being a lesbian meant she got a free pass to hate other women. And yes, she was very much pro abortion.

I reblogged down below a post exposing her antics and oh boi, Black people seem to have a whole condo in her head 💀

She apparently remade (missouriangynoid) but I can't access to her blog, so I either blocked her or she did, which I'd love to bc I like the idea of my blog being kryptonite to rightoids degens 🩵

Absolutely not surprised to see her mingle with other infamous rightoid degenerates like zh0re, thelastonewastaken, etc. Birds of the same feather....

It's fascinating how she and other anti Black will try to gass themselves as having credentials in Black culture criticism saying shit like "I've lived in Black neighbors" yeah you're still not Black. You'll never truly understand what it's like to be Black, our experience, perspective and cultural code. Precisely like men living along with women will never understand what it's like to be a women and speak over them. Funny how that works.

I live in France surrounded by White people and I'll NEVER have the audacity to speak over White people and condescendingly say what they should do to fix their social problems. The entitlement to do so is so pathologically White savior-ish, it's almost comical.

And it's obvious her questions was rhetorical and that she actually never bothered inquiring Black people about that. Black people didn't wait for a lousy White woman on Tumblr questions to take actions to improve the community... she's not the first nor the last idiot who thought she did something making those backhanded fake concern statement before her white audience.... Does she really think Black people don't actually know there's a violence/parenting problem in our community? like- who does she think she is? 💀

I already made post about White rehashing the false narrative of Blacks being the main attackers of Asians so I'll leave it there 🙃

(x)

See how these White rightoids pretend caring about Asians safety and pushing Black people under the bus for being (anti Asian) racists when they are the one championing hate crimes and are the second biggest Asian murderers (after Asian themselves)? 💀 It's all projection.

Those people LIE. They LIE because they want to shove a narrative. They are obsessed in shifting the blame towards others instead of facing their own violence and wrongdoings. I mean, there's a whole flock of White folks calling "crisis actor" White people being caught doing evil shit 🥴 They cannot grasp they aren't any morally better than anyone else, so they'll make up excuse to downplay their own evilness.

I think it's pretty rich from missouriangothic to blame the Blacks to make everything about them and derailing discussions to center their own struggle when WHITE PEOPE do that ALL👏🏾THE👏🏾TIME👏🏾

I mean how many times White men constantly move the goalpost to non White men whenever we talk about male violence? as if these non White men.... weren't men themselves??

Remember how White women S E E T H E D about the karen meme and deflected about "aKtcHualLy the MALE consumers are the worst so stop talking about racist White women using their white women tears to call on the police and get Black people into trouble!!!"?

But it's only a problem when Black people do it bc in a typical racist fashion they consider non White communities prioritizing themselves as a personal offense.¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

sorry but Black people asking why the BLM tagged disappeared when StopAsianHate was trending doesn't mean they want to silence Asians or any other tag trending that day. It's a known fact that Tumblr glitches and makes some hot topic disappear from the trending page so it wasn't an outlandish question. But she was too stupid & biased to remotely handle this possibly.

Seeking for more promotion for yourself is different from putting others under your thumb, and it's interesting how she and like minded people think it's the same thing because that's precisely how THEY function. That's why so many White (heterosexual) are mad at the sudden over visibility of minority in medias, because to them, 'others' uplifting themselves is ERASURE. When you come from a place of privilege, equality comes off as oppression. And since this resentfulness is too embarrassing to admit, you'll eventually argue that this privilege didn't even exist to begin with 🙃

Yeah becky, and a bunch of these Black people probably had to deal with racist Asians. But you guys love to act like racism Black/Asian race dynamic was one-sided somehow. The difference with you and your racist squad is that Black & Asians supporting each other don't use those negative experience to brush an entire race as irredeemable. Imagine being so TOXIC that you're foaming at the mouth to witness ppl from community that had their share of mutual grievance eventually come together for a greater good😐 Following her own logic, Black people should be questioned whenever they feel solidary with White people considering the well documented history of racism and oppression (that goes beyond dealing with racist trolls on a blog) from the White 🤔

But, yeah, Black people are the racists angry ones who refuse to assimilate & get over their struggle 🙃

Ah yes, so unquestionably minority classes that there are blue twitter users with "nigger" in their name handle, have the priviliege of having whole website dedicated to revel on dead Black dead bodies, that Black women are exposed to significantly more hate online to the point that freaking AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL is on the case, but yeaaaaa wE cAnt sAy anYtHiNg abOut bLack peOplE 🤪

The data shows Black women were 84 percent more likely than White women to be disproportionately targeted. One in ten tweets mentioning Black women was abusive or problematic, compared to one in 15 for White women. Women of color were 34 percent more likely to be targeted.

I also always said that beside public person & entertainment scene, the trans immunity totem wasn't a thing and that trans people were seen as a very niche and weird community by the average normie. Just the other day I was talking with colleagues about how ridiculous it was for men to ID as women and they all agreed with me. Being "trans critical" is pretty non controversial for regular people. That's far from being that taboo that will get you ostracized from society is you dare say anything bad about them.

And I'd go as far as to say that the anti trans thing can become a bankable grift considering the "no pedo tranny in schools" thing has become a popular meme and a quick way for ANTi grifters to make a place for themselves in the conservatives scene.

NO ONE IS UNQUESTIONABLE in 2023. But those people are hellbent playing the victim, when reality proves them wrong. That's how stupid they are, because none of them seemingly bothered asking for actual evidence for such claims. It's all about their feefees.

I mean, homegirl is complaining about being sIlenCed while she's spouting her nonsense out here. No one is oppressing her, it's just in her head.

[seekingthestars]

tagged by @koalammas!! thank youuu 💞

buckle up ladies and gents time for some rambles okay go

1. Are you named after anyone?

nope lol my middle name was going to be Rose after my great-grandma on my mom's side, but my parents didn't want to offend either side of the family by using a name from the other side of the family so they ended up opting for completely random names for me and my brother hahaha

2. When was the last time you cried?

around april 21 (friend's funeral, her brother was speaking during it and i did not keep it together)

3. Do you have kids?

nope! only my cat, who i love and adore with my entire heart, she is my sweet lil angel muffin

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

kinda depends i guess? sometimes?

5. What is the first thing you notice about a person?

ohhh good question hmm i guess if i'm just seeing someone in passing, probably appearance? otherwise how they interact with and treat other people.

6. What’s your eye color?

brown, but leans a little hazel-ey some days.

7. Scary movie or happy ending?

agree that i like satisfying endings that are also hopefully happy! but between these two options, happy endings, i cannot do scary movies or tv shows or anything, i get freaked out and then can't sleep lol

8. Any special talents?

i genuinely don't know L O L i don't know what would constitute a special talent??? i can memorize song lyrics pretty quickly and then they sorta embed themselves into my brain forever, does that count??

9. Where were you born?

southern usa!

10. What are your hobbies?

video games, watching movies/dramas (though i do not always have the attention span for it lol), reading, crafting (i like physically making things with my hands since i just do design on my computer all day for work! i like trying lots of different things, recently been trying a little bit of hand embroidery. also painting little ceramic figures and stuff like that), cosplaying. i've been trying this year to build taking a walk into my daily routine, not sure if i count it as a hobby or not lol

11. Do you have any pets?

my sweet sweet rileycat!!!! i love cats!!!!

12. What sports do you/have you played?

am not a sports girlie LOL i did tap/ballet/jazz for six-ish years when i was younger! in high school i took theatre classes and was in the plays/musicals instead of sports.

13. How tall are you?

5'4" which is like 162.5cm??

14. Favourite subject in school?

oh i love english, i always loved english. and math! i actually really loved math up until i took calculus. my calculus teacher was horrible, he made you feel stupid for asking questions and he intentionally made the tests too long to finish in a class period and made them extra confusing, it left me in tears more than once. cried at school bc i failed a lot of those tests. anyway i got a 5 on my AP exam for calculus (highest score) so i understood the material, my teacher just sucked and made me hate math after i'd loved it my entire life so ✌️

also loved my theatre classes in high school ahhhh

15. Dream job?

i think something working with cats / big cats / red pandas would be really fun. not a vet necessarily, i don't think i could handle it lol, but like a cat rescue or animal sanctuary maybe??? idk honestly

but yeah mostly agree with the "something that won't drain me and actually leaves me with savings and a will to live" answer. i like my current job/workplace/coworkers a lot more than my last job, but i still don't know if i'd want to be in this field until i retire, that's so many more years and clients sometimes make me wanna bash my head into a wall lol

i have a hard time with the ~dream job~ question bc i've just never felt like i had a "calling" or any overwhelming grand idea with what i've wanted to do with my life, i'm just vibing my way through somehow

Bonus: any significance to your blog's name:

NOPE lol when i was making this blog uhhhh 12 years ago everything that i wanted at the time had been taken and this was the only thing i could think of that i liked that was available and it was just something random 😂 i've thought about changing it but idk it's been too long now LOL