#and i'm Very frustrated
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(This post was sponsored by a 1+ hour commute)
#I'm so frustrated how little time and energy i have after a day is done#i didn't win the fight against depression to have lofe ruined by THAT now#lacking time and energy to go on job hunt.. it's all very small steps only#a part time job would be marvellous but what flat can be paid with that#maybe also my anxiety is stopping me from getting a new job. what if i get fired. what if it's horrible there. ahh.. i need more courage#mine capitalism#anti-capitalism#work
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i lost steam tonight forgive me
redraw of this old one
#one piece#nico robin#wtt art#robin month 2025#day 20#i'm just tired from work and getting frustrated that it wasn't turning out very good#bleh#im sorry i'll do better tomorrow i hope
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Okay current design for these weird guy things, may draw them again in the future because I like their designs more now 🍒🫐🍋🟩
#dhmis#dhmis recolors#ok so to start with#my design for duck is inspired by daffy duck. specifically chuck jones daffy duck#so I thought what if I made red duck or as I like to call cherry be inspired by Bob clampetts version of daffy duck#as to mirror eachother in some random way#it's not very clear here but blue string guy here has a more cowardly personality#while green guys wide eyes (i like to call him lime) in his only appearance was so funny to me#i decided to give him a “never has slept or will” esque personality so illogical#and well very easily angered because tired people tend to be frustrated#dhmis art#dont hug me im scared#don't hug me i'm scared
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having seen at least the rough outlines of all the romances now I have to say that I think emmrich's is probably objectively the best in terms of coherence and completeness of story arc (with the understanding that ultimately the 'best' romance is whichever one makes YOUR heart sing anyway so objectivity is a silly thing to claim that way, it just felt like it's the arc with the most well-paced focused content and the least dangling threads)... but lucanis' is my favourite haha. just. the whole kneeling before your beloved full of reverence but without any of the distance that usually implies??? his complete undramatic certainty and calm in every scene with rook after this, having spent the whole game caught between fear and longing???? mr. lives in a pantry but it says nothing about my psyche don't worry about it it's purely for tactical reasons that I keep myself contained in a small dark room not entirely unlike a cell, love among the parsnips -- finally coming to rook in their room and it's so comfortable and comforting???? after all the times rook supports and comforts him through the game he's finally able to return the same to them when they need it while being so calm and steady and it's so fucking sweet and feels so effortless and with no price attached?????? he basically assigns himself the role of your bodyguard and he WILL stab a god over it??????????????? the turn to protector (which was in his heart all along longing to get out and find a place) of it all????? he sounds like he's found himself unexpectedly stumbling into such a soul-lightening state of revelatory existential relief, full on 'you only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves' mary oliver style, and he goes and he shares that with rook and protectively envelops them in it when they're hurting??????????????????????????? hello for the maker's sake hello can anyone hear me?????
#listen I was forged in the fires of garrusmancing. I went through two whole games just to get a gentle headbutt and some tender words#before me3 comes along and rewards you for your tenacity more fully#me? the reyes romancer???? I have the strength and headcanon game to bear the relative lack of content before the end#when the endgame is this good I am willing to hold out for it haha the way he looks at rook towards the end......#I also really liked taash' (it's really sweet) but I don't think I have any rooks ready to go right now who would go for that vibe#emmrich for sure is going to be my either crow or shadow dragon romance it really is very good! and extremely goth not unrelatedly#undeniably that old man has the most game out of anyone in this story. the move with the flower??? I'm sorry????#I actually like that lucanis' romance blooms out of the safety of an established friendship more than anything (again. avowed garrusmancer)#but emmrich... he's got some next level romantic stuff going on and is being both so wholesome and such a freak about it lmao#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#rookanis#all jokes aside I totally respect and understand that people are a bit disappointed and frustrated -- they're not wrong to feel that!#there really are some gaps in content there for the midgame#however I was personally custom built by experience to get the most out of this scenario as possible and by god I will#just as I feel that ryder and reyes go off and have some soul-shrivingly good sex after the first kiss#(it makes that arc make a lot more sense to me haha)#I think rook and lucanis Get Up To It after the second coffee date. weird of them to not show us that but okay I'll fill it in myself then
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I'm seeing some frustration over fandom creatives expressing anger or distress over people feeding their work into ChatGPT. I'm not responding to OP directly because I don't want to derail their post (their intent was to provide perspective on how these models actually work, and reduce undue panic, which is all coming from a good place!), but reassurances that the addition of our work will have a negligible impact on the model (which is true at this point) does kind of miss the point? Speaking for myself, my distress is less about the practical ramifications of feeding my fic into ChatGPT, and more about the principle of someone taking my work and deliberately adding it to the dataset.
Like, I fully realize that my work is a drop in the bucket of ChatGPT's several-billion-token training set! It will not make a demonstrable practical difference in the output of the model! That doesn't change the fact that I do not want my work to be part of the set of data that the ChatGPT devs use for training.
According to their FAQ, ChatGPT can and will use user input to train itself. The terms and conditions explicitly state that they save your chats to help train and improve their models. (You can opt-out, but sharing is the default.) So if you're feeding a fic into ChatGPT, unless you've explicitly opted out, you are handing it to the ChatGPT team and giving them permission to use it for training, whether or not that was your intent.
Now, will one fic make a demonstrable difference in the output of the model? No! But as the person who spent a year and a handful of months laboring over my fic, it makes a difference to me whether my fic, specifically, is being used in the dataset. If authors are allowed to have a problem with the ChatGPT devs for scraping millions of fics without permission, they're also allowed to have a problem with folks handing their individual fics over via the chat interface.
I do want to add that if you've done this to a fic, please don't take this as me being upset with you personally! Folks are still learning new information and puzzling out what "good" vs. "bad" use is, from an ethical standpoint. (Heck, my own perspective on this is deeply based on my own subjective feelings!) And we certainly shouldn't act like one person feeding a fic into ChatGPT has the same practical negative impact, on a broad societal scale, as a team using a web crawler to scrape five billion pieces of artwork for Stable Diffusion.
The point is that fundamentally, an ethical dataset should be obtained with the consent of those providing the data. Just because it's normalized for our data to be scraped without consent doesn't make it ethical, and this is why ChatGPT gives users the option to not share data— there is actually a standardized way (robots.txt) for website servers to set policies for how bots/crawlers can interact with them, for exactly this reason— and I think fandom artists and authors are well within their rights to express a desire for opting out to be the socially-respected default within the fandom community.
#maybe this is an ice cold take but i've been meaning to go off about datasets for a while so here we are i guess#i can respect what op's frustrations were and what they were trying to get at! but also i do not want my fic in chatgpt's dataset#regardless of whether it will make a practical difference#and again i don't think the people doing this are necessarily bad actors or having a huge negative social impact#chatgpt#chat gpt#ai#fandom#negative#(possibly! i'm trying not to be!! especially because this is very feelings-based and there are many things i am not considering)#the model may not demonstrably change because of your fic. but it does have your fic now and that does matter maybe idk
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#carlos sainz#autumn posts#loml!!! ❤��💫#hi everyone!!!! sorry I've been gone for a while!!#I missed SO much OMGGG so much has happened!! 🥺 I'll be reblogging to catch up on Carlos' modeling adventures and Enchanté rosé today + more#I have some saved Milan moments too and tewe stek moments that now feel so long ago haha!! omg the gp is NEXT WEEK??#😭❤️ so hyped#ahhh tbh I sped through dts just to see it for myself#so reductive and frustrating on so many levels#some lovely moments though and thanks to everyone for capturing them in lovely clips and beautiful gifs ❤️#I'll focus on the good but wow... very frustrating editing#anyways I won't ramble here much!!!#as I'm want to do only always#sending everyone lots of well wishes ❤️#and ahhh this video for these gifs#his hand in his hair and his laugh and the way he says he was thinking 'wild things'#😵💫💦✨ good god#he's barefoot and pregnant in my mind palace's kitchen rn wearing only that ill fitting Williams apron#I shall stop there 🙂↕️✨
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Ja'Marr Chase Crying Compilation 💜
#i finally did it#been saving these clips for years lmao#now let me clarify that they aren't all him ACTIVELY crying#just to round it out i included a few where he's clearly very near tears (in interviews and such)#we got it all here baby! happy tears! sad tears! frustrated angry tears!#truly a compilation just for me and a few other sickos on this website <3#ja'marr chase#cincinnati bengals#joe burrow#(is in it a bit. of course)#had a Rough morning and then the rest of the day off#decided to spend the afternoon finally making this to channel negativity into something /somewhat/ productive lmao#crying and being like! speaking of crying! let me finally get this done like i've been talking about for years#PLEASE let me know if i forgot anything. i'm sure i must have.#anyway. my pisces angel <3 <3#truly nothing better in this world than a man crying <3#(OH MY GOD IT TOOK AN HOUR AND A HALF TO UPLOAD AND THE QUALITY IS HORRIBLE!!! THIS AWFUL AWFUL WEBSITE!!!)
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I hate blaming things on ADHD, but it seriously gives me such memory anxiety.
I hate that it's still seen as the "silly" neurological disorder. Because having ADHD sucks as an adult. Good lord.
#I'm feeling very happy right now btw! Please dont worry about me#I'm just feeling the memory issues again and urg.#I usually brush it off because it happens often. But they can be very frustrating!
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I'm breaking this one out by itself because it's a little funny.
*Dean's phone rings*
*Dean answers without looking*
*Dean proceeds to yell at Cas*
Ah, right. What could possible be so important?
/////
Sam goes on to tell Dean that *drumroll* Sam is Lucifer's true vessel.
WOW! Scary!
DEAN: *sarcastically* Just when you thought you were out, they pull you back in, huh Sammy? SAM: That's it? That's your response?
It's... completely lost of Sam, though, the REASON for Dean's sarcasm.
See. It's this: now that Sam's found out that HE'S a vessel, he's in his car, an absolute FIRE lit under his goddamned tail, EAGER to get back in and fight.
Sam.
SAMMY.
🤦🤦🤦🤦
Dean throws a hint.
DEAN: *sarcastically again* I guess I'm a little numb to the earth-shattering revelations at this point. SAM: Well what are we gonna do about it?
And Sam... still doesn't get it.
Sigh.
Here's the thing. Sam wasn't panicking when they learned that Dean was a vessel. Only Cas and Bobby were panicked and stressed. They were mean, but they were at least aware of the reality of things.
But Sam.
Yes, Sam was going through things, struggling with things, and taking time to go through things is okay. But on the other hand, it definitely still hurts that Sam wasn't insisting on staying in the fight on Dean's behalf, to protect Dean from becoming a vessel.
But now that Sam's learned that he's a vessel?
Boom.
It's not even that, though. It's this whole conversation.
Because what's missing here? Empathy for Dean's plight.
Sam doesn't realize that this is why he's perpetually at... the kids' table. This right here.
In this whole conversation, Sam is eaten up with ranting about his own feelings, about how he's sick of being a puppet, and how he's going to hunt Lucifer down and gain redemption.
Sam's all about "how he can do this," how he's "gonna prove it to you."
It makes him seem a lot younger than he is.
....
There's no acknowledgment of how helpless Dean must have been feeling all this time, knowing that he's been targeted by an archangel, about how scary this whole thing is.
Hell, even Cas acknowledged Dean's fears re: Michael.
I mean: He did it in his Cas way, but it still acknowledged the enormity of the fear.
Cas:
///
Meanwhile, Sam back in 5x01, right after DEAN learned about being Michael's vessel: Geez, why is everyone so cranky and stressed?
🥺Dean, what do you mean that you didn't mean your pep talk to Bobby? Whaaaat? 🥺
///
....
And the thing is. Not "getting it"? That's understandable. But this conversation is just... devoid of support for Dean.
And they're not. Sam's zapping all the strength for himself.
When they've been together lately, Dean is the big brother who lends support, and Sam isn't giving anything back. Sam's out to prove himself, not to support others.
And they tell older siblings and parents to be patient, to let them learn, to step back and forgive, to be "a soft place to land."
That's hard to do. And it's exhausting.
And aside// Sam's apology to (demon) Bobby was SO MUCH NICER. Sam, where is this humility and energy for other people????
SAM: No, actually. Bobby, this is all my fault. I'm sorry. Lilith did not break the final seal. Lilith was the final seal. I killed her, and I set Lucifer free. You guys warned me about Ruby, the demon blood, but I didn't listen. I brought this on. I'm sorry.
#i think sibling jail is my fave new thing#GO TO SIBLING JAIL SAM#when sam is a vessel he expects everyone to panic#when dean is a vessel sam's just like: yay go team let's go#spn 5x04#spn 5x05#aside it's fun for dean to yell at cas at this point#he likes that cas is annoying him#and he likes making a fuss about it#i'm 99.999% sure i'm correct#it's part of the fun in bickering with someone who cares about you and is willing to disagree with you#dean doesn't get that form many people#it's probably comforting that cas calling him has become a regular part of his day#also i'm pretty sure there was a whole episode where sam AND dean are in a bratty fight and not thinking about bobby#but like#that kind of immaturity is expected sometimes#but there comes a point when...sigh#yes it's a very normal very frustrating part of life and growing up#to see your childhood caregivers as people#and hey from time to time dean puts too much on bobby on cas etc#it’s a scary tho to be alive
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#slowly bringing this guy back into training after a two month break#new mare turns out to be incredibly buddy sour so we cannot leave the stable alone for prolonged periods of time#we're down to 5 minute walks and visits to the arena only when both me and her owner can make the time to head there together#he's still incredibly well behaved for a very bored; mildly frustrated 4-year-old#all things considered#some minor discussions here and there when being asked to yield#though I'm attributing some of that to him being distracted by the mare/ not being used to sharing the arena yet#equine#horses#horseblr#horses of tumblr#cruzado#spanish horse#.creacher
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Fun Catholic Lord of the Rings trivia for you:
Tolkien had a devotion to St. John the Evangelist (which should not have been surprising, given his name).
Traditionally, the symbol of St. John the Evangelist is an eagle.
There's no indication it's intentional allegory, but it does add a very cool layer to those scenes.
#tolkien#catholic things#lord of the rings#i felt like i bent my 'only religious podcasts during lent' rule a bit#by listening to bishop robert barron's podcast interview holly ordway about tolkien's faith#but there was a lot of religious content so i think it counted at least as much as religion as it did literature#it did its job of *really* making me want to read dr. ordway's book#the library that i was driving to at the time *said* that book was on its shelf#but there is no sign of it#which is intensely frustrating#i'm not sure i want to approach the librarian to ask about it#because it outs me as two different types of very specific nerd#and i prefer to remain unnoticed as much as possible#the other cool trivia fact is that tolkien is kind of a spiritual grandson of st. john henry newman#newman founded the catholic oratory in birmingham#and the priest who raised tolkien after his mother's death was a student of his#and supposedly that oratory really shaped tolkien's faith#and it must have been pretty strong faith because he's one of the rare people who came through wwi with his faith intact#i could have made a separate post about that but i can't remember specific names and i don't feel like googling#so you get vague mentions in the tags instead
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A 100% accurate representation* of what would've happened if Cellbit had recruited the rest of the Favela 5 to help him infiltrate the Federation to save Felps.

(Inspired by this post)
#QSMP#Cellbit#Tazercraft#Favela 5#ForeverplayerG#Felps#PacTW#Mikethelink#Favela Five#Pac#Mike#Forever#Walter Bob#Edited#The amount of times Vegas decided to just. Stop doing its primary function while I worked on this is so frustrating. lmao#<- full of rage#Ok but frustrations aside: Yes this is a niche joke but it's VERY funny. To me#And frankly that's all that matters#I'm never doing that many flip trackings again though#The Madagascar movies have such a unique brand of humor that really gets me#I love them#Literally the only OOC part of this video is Cellbit calling Pac and Mike suckups#Tazercraft would NEVER#I kept cooing over cubito Pac while editing this. He's so cute and he's perfect as a little penguin. He's just a little guy!!!#That scene where he's flying away like a balloon is an edit I'm proud of#I think it's very funny how I was so emotional over Pac the other day and then I edited his little cubito getting hit by a car#I know I could've put anyone as the tourist guide but making it be Walter Bob was just so funny to me#Anyways. Do you think I'd get hatecrimed if I put this on the Tazercraft Reddit. I don't use Reddit but everyone complains about theirs#So I thought it might be fun. Idk like I said I don't use Reddit. I haven't decided yet but I am Pondering it#portfolio
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I don't know if you are still doing the ms paint doodle requests but if you do can I ask for SpeedingBullet/SniperScout red and blue? I am a SUCKER for star-crossed lovers
[send a request, get a shitty ms paint doodle]
#gopher art#tf2 sniper#tf2 scout#sniperscout#speeding bullet#dont worry I will eternally be taking mspaint doodle requests. just may take a while to get to if Im busy. but today I'm SO not busy lmao#Its kinda funny. I dont do crossfaction stuff very often (unless its Dell and Jacques. I think of them often) so now I'm considering how#these two even get together. maybe it starts because Snorpy gets frustrated with Scout being a challenging target to hit? then it sorta#devolves into long distance flirty smartassery lol
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CHRIS REDFIELD —Code: Veronica X
#resident evil code veronica#code veronica#chris redfield#gamingedit#reviledit#my edits#I think this is a very underrated Chris and design tbh#(i've been trying to gif this specific scene of Chris for like... a month and trying to colour it has been very frustrating)#(so it's getting posted anyways even though I'm not 100% on it)
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FUROR_MACHINAE is about being autistic btw lmao
i'd write a big long lyric analysis but the long and short of it is, i tried writing from the perspective of a robot who is frustrated about not being accepted for what she is, with people trying to understand her outside of her mechanical nature rather than embracing it as something that makes her different, but not lesser. but then after writing it i realized that i accidentally wrote a song about seeking autism acceptance rather than ignoring it entirely
#robot autism is very real for me#so i guess it shouldn't be surprising that i ended up doing that#but it was definitely not on purpose initially#but i'm glad people have been liking it!#the “fury” in fury of the machine is not necessarily out of malice btw#shes just frustrated that she can't be fully appreciated for everything she is#she doesnt want to be treated like a human because she isnt one#she wants her robotic nature to be accepted and still be treated with the same autonomy and rights as the sentient being she is#adachi rei#furor_machinae#furor machinae#utau#vocaloid#machina mori
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Me: "Can I please use all this energy to draw on an actual project"
My brain: "You will draw the same character over and over and you will like it."
Me: "Okay."
#rayman#artists on tumblr#these were made over the course of like two months or so#you can see that i was messing with his design a bit#kind of adjusting the way i drew him as i went along#uhhh anyways yeah i just think he's neat#he's fun to draw#its because he doesn't have limbs#drawing limbs is my least favorite part of drawing any humanoid character#so him not having any takes away a lot of the frustration i often have in drawing certain dynamic poses#he's also very cartoony which is up my alley. very expressive and fun#he has helped me push drawing exaggerated expressions more#he has good shapes!! its good character design!!!#and drawing him is comforting#i'll draw something else eventually but for now i'm just having fun#i have no idea how i'm going to format this post on twitter without it getting cropped to hell#i will worry about that later
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