#and idk idk what a broken heart is because i'm not even someone anyone could care about that much

[kenzie-ann27]

the worst part about burning out is I actively try to not burn out by doing even more shit

[factual-fantasy]

Okay so I did some research on Seam and realized that it would be a crime to not add him to my AU in someway where him and Jevil reconcile and they escape to the multiverse together and are free and they're best friends and- 😭😭😭

I had a dark story all thought up for this but half way through drawing I changed the story so this isn't really canon anymore?? Or it might be idk- my Deltarune AU is only a few days into development so its constantly changing <XDD Sorry-

If anyone's interested in the story I've got it below the Keep reading :}} (Fair warning, its rather dark and disturbing..)

TLDR: This story is super dark and interesting to me but it might not be canon XD

ANYWAYS! The story behind this was Jevil and Seam come from a very dark and corrupt AU. Ruled by an even darker and wicked King (Lancers dad). In this AU they were Kings royal Magician and Jester as per usual. They were best friends though and preformed these beautiful displays of magic together. Side by side, hand in hand. They were best friends for years and always dreamed of one day running away together and finding a safe place to live.

Eventually Jevil met someone. Someone who spoke of a way to leave this place. They spoke of walking through your own reflection. And if done right, one could leave their AU entirely.. Jevil believed them out of desperation and tried to tell Seam about it. Seam thought Jevil was losing his mind. Walking through your own reflection? That makes no sense..

King caught wind of them plotting to escape. And as punishment to both of them he commanded Seam to lock Jevil away using his own magic.

In Seams eyes, Jevil was his best friend. His brother, the only thing in this world that he could trust. But he was more afraid of what King would do to him or Jevil for disobeying him, then he was willing to stand up against him. So while believing Jevil was sick in the head and needed help, he acted out of cowardice and sealed Jevil away..

I'm thinking that eventually sometime later, Jevil is able to escape through his own reflection. A mirror. And either he goes back and sees Seam dressed in these beautiful robes and thinks "well the king must be treating him well. Guess I'll just leave him to reap the benefits of betraying me.. >:(" And leaves with a bitter heart. THAT, or he just left. Never going back to check on Seam or see if King was treating him well or not.

So the AU continues. With Jevil traveling from world to world, meeting new people and learning new things.. When eventually he's with the whole gang and they're all sitting in a restaurant or something.

When Jevil suddenly feels this overwhelming sense of doom. Something horrible is about to happen to Seam. He just knows it, its in his bones. Deep within his soul he can feel it. He knows- he needs to save him.

He falls back out of his chair into a mirror and heads straight for his old AU. Showing up just in time to stop Seam from.. well..

They end up talking. Turns out that after Jevil was imprisoned, Seam tried to sneak down to the basement and visit him. He wanted to apologize for imprisoning him and explain himself- but he was caught by King.

"I just wanted to see him!"

"For that I will take your eye."

"NO! Please don't take my eye!!"

"For talking back, I will take your voice too."

King took Seams eye and stitched his mouth shut. He could still talk but not very well. To make things worse, when Jevil escaped? Seam thought he had died. Why wouldn't he? His magical barrier was never broken and Jevil was gone. Surly he must have died somehow.. Meanwhile everyone else was under the impression that Seam let Jevil escape because they were friends.

Seam then suffered greatly for years as punishment for "letting Jevil escape". He was bound by these magical chains made by King. He was abused for years and at this point he had enough. But before he could do anything rash.. Jevil returned.

Jevil then felt the sinking horror realizing that he left Seam alone in this world to be abused by King. He abandoned him. After all those years of promising to one day run away together..

Seam betrayed Jevil, and Jevil abandoned Seam.

After realizing all of this and having a long emotional talk. Seam and Jevil deeply apologized to the other, and forgave each other. Marking the beginning of their new friendship. And despite Seam feeling like he doesn't deserve freedom, he agreed to run away with Jevil and finally be free with him.

~~~~

Now this story is super cool and morbid and all but now I'm questioning the story and wether or not I want it to be canon <XD

I have some other ideas that I really like too and this one is just a biiiiit dark... ish. I mean I've made worse- but idk I guess this one just has a bad taste to it..

I also like the idea that Seam has been with Jevil this whole time and was the first person he saved. Which motivated him to try and save other people and give them the same freedom that he gave to Seam. But then that would change the Grillby fight and Spamton situation a bit and also maybe effect the Goner kid situation- GAH!! I'll figure it out eventually- <XDD

I hope this wasn't too hard to stomach and if you read all the way through I thank you :}} 💖

[bedoballoons]

I’m back

I’m not sure if you write wlw or nblw/gnlw or anything like that but hear me out

anyway I was thinking, imagine the (fem! Or gn!) mechanic reader (yes my genshin self insert is a mechanic and I’m delulu) with lyney or Furina, or any other characters you wanna add if you want (idk how this works). Where the characters keep breaking things on purpose just so that the reader can come over and fix it and so they get to see reader. The reader catches on and teases the character. (You can make it lead to nfsw or not if you want ;) )

also I’ll give myself an emoji so here’s mine

-💫

I do any forms of relationships as long as they aren't incest or pedophilia! I absolutely love this idea!! I think it's super cute so I hope you don't mind but I decided to make it fluffy!! Enjoy and thank you for requesting <3

P.s Can I call you the starstruck anon?

─⊰⁠⊹ฺ🍂𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤⊰⁠⊹ฺ🍂

{༻~Just one more thing before you go~༺}

CW: Super sweet fluff! Reader works as a mechanic and the characters keep calling them up to fix things so they can spend time with them!

(Includes: Lyney, Navia, and Furina!)

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

𑁍༄Lyney:

Lyney kneeled down beside you, trying his best not to get in your way as you worked on the latest broken thing in his home...he just couldn't help it. Whenever he was near you it was like his heart decided to do its own performance, beating faster and skipping whenever your eyes landed on him...because of this sometimes the simple machinery he used in his home...would mysteriously end up not working, "So how goes the fixing hmm? My apologies for having to call you out here again, usually I'd just have Freminet take a look but he's currently busy"

"Seems to me like someone's intentionally sabotaging your heater...they even left the screwdriver inside of it." You turned to him with a sly smirk playing on your features, holding the screwdriver up to him so he could read Freminets name from it. The blush that followed was so adorable you couldn't help but tease him a little, "If you wanted me to spend time with you Lyney, you could have just asked~"

𑁍༄Navia:

"I truly cannot thank you enough for coming to my rescue again. It seems every time you leave the Spina di Rosula has yet another problem to fix...of course it's not particularly a bad thing because I enjoy your company immensely." The beautiful blonde chuckled nervously, trying to get ahold of herself before she ended up confessing her feelings to you, she was honestly shocked she hadn't yet..

"I'm always here whenever you need me Navia, it's definitely not a bad thing for me. I get to hang out with a goregous woman and get VIP treatment from the Spina."

"You're always welcome to anything here at-...I'm sorry did you just call me goregous?"

"Well...I figured since you're always bringing me here to fix things you've clearly sabotaged, it's only fair a make a little advancement myself.~"

The poor girl's face heated up, you'd figured it out? How long had you known?! "I- oh my..."

𑁍༄Furina:

"I truthfully have no idea how anyone expects a archon to live under such conditions, every time I go to use something it's no longer working. If I didn't have you'd I'd surely have left this place for something better by now." Furina talked away while you worked, trying to act as normally abnormal as ever...even though inside her emotions were on a rampage. If only you knew she wanted so desperately to play the part of your lover more than any other role, she'd even sabotaged her own residence so she could see you more often.

"I actually believe I've found a solution to keep things from breaking...if the archon so wished to hear it."

She went dead silent, unable to fathom how you could possibly stop anything in her house from breaking, "The archon wishes to, even someone with my divinity can't even think how a simple human could make something no longer able to break, I'd love to see what maniac idea you've come up with."

"Its actually very easy, all I have to do is ask if you'd like to go out sometime. Then we could spend time together without you needing to break things~"

"I-i what on earth are you talking about? I wouldn't break something just to spend time with someone, I am a archon with a busy life. I don't have the time for such nons-"

"Lady Furina..."

"Yes?"

"You left your glove in the pipe."

"..."

"May I take you out on a date?"

"...yes you may..."

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚~Have a nice day~*⁠.⁠✧

[echobx]

broken heart (3) - a JJ Maybank blurb

summary: JJ goes to apologize to y/n

warnings: swearing, JJ being a little shit (just a tiny bit), lowkey fighting, angsty vibes (?)

word count: 1.5k

author's note: fact is,,,, idk what I'm doing because I have never written like this but I hope you guys like it (also is somehow longer than I intended)

part 1 | part 2

A simple knock against your window before it was pushed open and JJ climbed inside like he had done so many times before. 

You were in the shower, and he could hear you sing along to your music like you always did, but this time it felt different. It wasn't as much background noise to him as it had been most times. 

He kept listening as he settled on your bed; shoes off because he knew how much it annoyed you when he made your bed dirty. 

All the while you had no clue about anything that was happening in the room next door and kept humming while wrapping yourself in a towel and walking back to your room. The small house had thin walls, but just this one time you were blessed with your parents being out on their monthly date night. You could be as loud or as quiet as you wanted without anyone saying anything about it. 

You walked in, not turning on the light and therefore not taking notice of the boy in your bed, who was eyeing you carefully.

But JJ took notice of every little move you made. How you seemed to dance towards your closet. How you dropped your towel before pulling the long shirt over your body. Especially, how you hadn't put anything else but the old shirt on. It wasn't like he didn't know you were hot, but he had also never told you that he did think it, too scared of crossing a line. But he couldn't stop the heat that was rising in him as he thought of all the things he could do if he was of the lesser decent sort. 

You walked over to your bed, phone in your hand and not paying any attention to your surroundings while sitting down. 

“I'm not gonna text you first, dumbass. It's your fault, not mine,” you muttered to yourself before slamming the phone in the pillow next to you and letting yourself fall back. 

You screamed as you jumped back up after having fallen backwards into someone who shouldn't even be there. Turning around and switching on your nightlight you looked down at the boy in your bed and huffed. “Jesus! JJ, what- Why are you here?” 

“Am I not allowed to?” he asked, maybe a bit too cocky considering the fact that he had snuck in and was still lying in your bed. 

“No. Your privileges got revoked for an indefinite amount of time,” you snarled, and he sat up, pulling his legs up and placing his arms on his knees while looking straight at you. 

“You gonna kick me out?” he was still smirking, and it was making your blood boil a bit.

“How long have you been in here?” 

“Not long, cute ass tho,” he chuckled, and you couldn't help the fact that you turned crimson. 

“Leave,” you said trying to regain composure, but he knew you too well, knew you wouldn't actually kick him out. 

But he did eventually get up, walking over to you and brushing a strand of hair from your face; something he had never done before, at least not like he did now. He was careful and gentle and nothing like the teasing ass who usually just destroyed your hair in passing. 

“I came to apologize,” JJ whispered.

“Good, tell me what you are apologizing for?” you taunted him, because you were aware that he had never picked up on it. On how much more you liked him than he liked you. 

“For being an asshole,” he replied. 

“Lukewarm. Take another guess,” you glared at him, at the blue eyes that seemed so much prettier than any others you had ever looked at. 

“For nearly getting myself hurt.”

“Warmer, but still not it.”

“Then tell me,” he asked, and you stepped back, shaking his hand off, that had remained close to your face just to twirl some of your hair. 

You huffed before looking back at him. “Why should I? That's always been it. You don't see me, not even when it's important. You always look past me, and I'm not doing that anymore. I'm not waiting around anymore. I'm not gonna do it. And it's so dumb, so incredibly stupid of me to think you'd ever look at me like that.” 

“Like what?” JJ was a little confused again, because he hadn't expected this. He had played the scenarios in his head. And each time you had forgiven him, and you moved on together, best friends again, like it had always been. 

“I'm- You hurt my feelings, JJ. I'm your best friend, I think that should mean more to you than it does. And I don't need to have to want more from you than that just to care about you. And I care so much. Too much, maybe.” You shook your head, clawing at your scalp as you tried to not lose yourself in the new wave of heartache that was rolling in on you. 

“I'll try to not get hurt again. Is that it? Is that what you want?” JJ asked and stepped closer again. 

“Yes,” you said firmly. 

“Then why did you shake your head just now?” His eyebrow was lifted as he nodded towards you, but you hadn't even caught yourself doing it. It was a subconscious decision, a bad one at that.

“I don't know,” you whispered, and he stepped even closer. 

“I think you do.” His warm breath was fanning over your lips, and you had to gulp. 

“I’m not your girlfriend or whatever,” you hushed, and a small smile slipped over his face. 

“No, you're not.” 

“And I'm not a side piece either. I'm not to be thrown away. I'm to be handled with care,” you kept your voice low, heart racing and feeling the heat rise in you, filling your head and heart and more delicate parts that you didn't even want to think of.

“You're worse than a girlfriend,” JJ laughed silently. “Girlfriends usually don't know this much bullshit about their boyfriends.”

“Keeping a few secrets is supposed to be healthy in a functional relationship,” you said and absentmindedly wet your lips while doing so. 

“I bet you got some for the both of us,” JJ replied, leaning in closer, but you stopped him before he could do something that would ruin your friendship. 

“JJ, no,” you held him at an arm's length. 

“What do you mean no?” he furrowed his brows. 

“I'm not going to destroy years of friendship for a quick fuck.” Your words felt like a slap to his face. 

“What then? Tell me what you want, woman!” he begged, tugging at his hair, and it was truly the first time you had seen him actually desperate. 

“I want to not get my heart broken just because you're pissed. I want to feel admired and not have only ever one date and be ghosted for no reason. I want to be loved, JJ. I want all of that and I don't think that should be too much to ask for.” The words flowed out of you before you could even register them, but it didn't matter because it was the truth and that's all he ever asked of you. 

“But you already have all that,” JJ replied almost inaudibly, feeling his throat close up on all the feelings coming up, ones he had suppressed for years.

“Where?” you huffed, and his face contorted with a type of pain you had never seen on him before. It was like he was fighting himself over it. 

“Me, all right. I-” he turned and looked away. “I do, I mean- Fuck, okay. I love you, y/n.”

“I know, we are best friends. You love me and JB and Pope and Kie and Sarah and Cleo. It's what we do. It's nothing special.” 

JJ turned to look at you again. There was no doubt that you truly believed the words you had just uttered. That the only way you thought he could ever love you, was as a friend. What he hadn't expected was that it would hurt as much as it did to hear it. His heart was squeezing in his chest like it hadn't in a very long time, and when he clawed at it, you came to help, like you always did. Wrapping your arms around him for comfort was like second nature to you both. 

And as you stood there, his head buried in your neck, hearts beating against each other. He finally found his courage again. Because it didn't matter how hurt you were, you'd always come back to him, and he'd always return to you, no matter what. 

JJ pulled away just enough to hold your face in his callused hands, the cold rings softly indenting your cheeks. “I love you,” he whispered and connected his lips to yours without asking for permission, because he was too scared that you would start turning his words around again. 

please don't copy and/or post my work onto other platforms! ~e©ho

part 4

taglist: @ijustwantttoread @spideysimpossiblegirl @redhead1180 @kys4-20

PS: yes I intend on writing a fourth part, but only cause I ended on a cliffhanger to make myself feel like I actually need to write it and not leave you guys hanging

[obae-me]

Omg Hi!!! It has been so long since I have seen you on my dash! How are you doing love? I hope you are doing super well ^.^ I recently saw your Mc with trauma post. I loved it so much, and it has also given me a lot to mull over the past few days lol.

Honestly I love the idea of a traumatized Mc and the brothers feeling like absolute shit for the way they treated them in the beginning... but yk another part of me wonders when I imagine my own traumas in that scenario... that for people (the bros- literal demons) who have faced so many things and traumas in their own lives, whether my feelings or pain is even comparable to that. Ik you can't compare things like that and the brothers would probably even be mad if I think of my feelings this way since it's the "Ohhhh someone always has it worse. It's not even that bad so just suck it up" self-deprecating part of me. Despite knowing ALL THAT I can't help but think that I am not traumatized enough to deserve empathy lmao (I realize how stupid it sounds saying it out loud).

So that is what REALLY got me thinking. What about an Mc that is genuinely terrified of scrutiny, being a nuisance and just basically inconveniencing anyone for things that are just basic needs. Idk if I am explaining it well enough oof and a mc like that (like me lmao) certainly won't bode well with Lucifer. Atleast not in the beginning. I could hate him (I could never but if I did) but still be terrified of disappointing him. This is what I mean when I say I love him but he reminds me too much of my father habits wise 🤢.

I am thinking a Mc who is afraid of asking even their basic needs at the beginning once Lucifer mumbled about them being too much trouble. Mc who feels so extremely guilty when the brothers get anything for them, cuz they feel like they have to work for it or they don't deserve it. Mc whose blood freezes over when they break something and try to replace it as quick as possible so no one blames them. Mc who never expresses their concerns so as to not add to the brothers' already full plates or worry them. It hurts to bottle it all up but seeing the brothers' concerned faces with so much PITY is a thousand times worse. Mc who never complains and adjusts to even unfair situations so as to not be a bother. Mc who just takes, takes and takes everything bad and doesn't say a word cuz they feel like they deserve it. Mc who tells little white lies to hide their flaws and be the perfect exchange student and avoid scoldings and criticisms ; only to stew in shame, disgust, self-loathing when someone eventually catches up on one of the lies (the person probably didn't even make a big deal of it/ was only mildly disappointed but Mc feels their heart breaking in two as they think they have broken their trust forever and would never be trusted again)

Gosh this got way longer than I was expecting >.< and a lot of signs like these aren't really obvious until you are close to that person. I think so many of us are so hard and rutheless to ourselves when sometimes the thing we need the most is a little compassion and understanding ;-;

Hi! I love seeing you in my inbox and thank you! I've been in recovery mode for the last few months but am finally coming back out of that cave and working on my hobbies again (seriously going too long without writing almost feels like going without food for me)! I hope you've been doing well too!

And oof, yes, I understand what you're saying completely. I'm like that too in a lot of ways, keeping certain details or complaints to myself because "Oh surely what I've been to is really nothing". And sometimes I let something slip and people get very concerned. Which is validating in a way, not that I need to be validated for it, everyone goes through their own pain and awful things SUCK no matter to what extent it is and I've had to learn that through my life.

(Wow that MC really is just me, huh? Calling me out are you? /j)

Honestly this type of MC is just canon to me. (I mean, the more pithy responses the MC has in original OM might just be due to writing but to me it just seems like the calm and general response of someone throwing out NPC answers as a survival tactic.)

They suck things up and soak up everything that's been said to them and work hard to remain a normal functioning being.

And of course Lucifer is an interesting character to think about with this MC because on one hand the human could absolutely despise him for the way he treats them. Or on the other hand (if you're like me I guess, which I realize is hella unhealthy, oops) the MC could look up to him and work extra hard to try to gain his validation, because getting praise from someone like that means you must not be a failure, right?

And just...the dynamic of that is so appealing to me, because Lucifer loves when people work hard and do what they're told, but then if he finally comes to the realization that they're burning out and actually almost putting themselves in more danger and harm because of HIM? And at the end of the day he's doing more damage than any of his chaotic brothers? (I like to have him spiral and be humbled just a bit)

Just all of the brothers doing some deep introspection once they come to care for MC and needing to sit down and realize that probably made their human feel so much worse and then spending the rest of eternity trying to fix that. And then the "I can fix him" mentality from MC turns into the "I can fix them" from every other character. A special Uno Reverse, if you will.

Oops, this turned into a fairly long ramble of my own...

Thanks for popping into my inbox with your thoughts! Traumatized MC deserves some extreme love

[wlfhrdlover]

Hello can you do a Ajax petropolus reader when the reader is badass with a sword and and stick but she is attacked by too much normie so he defend her and also stone the main/ leader they aren’t together yet. But they know they love each other (well more Ajax side, he knows) please 🐍✨👑

HEY!! Of course! I also want to apologize because I always write your requests but I get a creativity block in the middle of it EVERY DAMN TIME.

I don't know if you'll like it because I had no idea of how to write it but I really hope you like it </3

THE ARCHER.

Ajax Petropolus x fem!Addams!reader

summary: being an Addams were never easy, Y/N knew that way too well.

WARNINGS! bullying, violence and kinda gory themes.

A/N: I actually hate it, because it made sense in my head but idk if it came like I expected, I'm so sorry 😭

Combat, I'm ready for combat.

Y/N Addams, the sister of the talk of Nevermore, Wednesday Addams.

Not much different from her sister, Y/N was confident with a sharp tongue, but opposed from Wednesday's personality, Y/N was kind and a whole sunshine with the ones she cared about.

When she entered Nevermore with Wednesday, everyone noticed the difference between the two, while Wednesday couldn't even tolerate the air of Jericho, Y/N was open for changes and excited about the idea of making new friends.

Y/N just like her sister, loved morbid things, her favorite one though was the sword, since young age Gomez Addams taught her how to use a sword, she loved fencing or having her little battles with Pugsley.

Oddly enough, Y/N conquered on gaining Bianca Barclay's friendship, the siren carried a sour face when the Addams won their duel in fencing, but after a sweet smile and an apology for it, Bianca surrendered and asked for tips.

Which Y/N happily gave to her.

Since then, everyone talked about Y/N Addams and her opposite personality from her sister.

Through their first year, even though it was bumpy and rough, Y/N made friends, royal and real friends.

Enid Sinclair, Bianca Barclay, Yoko Tanaka, the Siren Twins – Kent and Divina –, Xavier Thorpe, Ajax Petropolus.

They all were pleasant to have Y/N by their side, along with her sister of course, even if Wednesday didn't said it out loud, everyone knew that she appreciated everything Y/N did for her, Y/N was the only one who truly understood her.

But Ajax.

Oh, Ajax.

The boy was whipped for the 'badass' girl, he loved everything about her, how she would snap to anyone who dared to say a thing about her friends or her family, how she would ace every duel in fencing classes, how she was simply her.

Everyone knew they both held feelings for each other, it was clear as crystal how they would look at each other and open goofy smiles, the softened glares they held whenever they spotted each other across the school, they were just scared to admit it.

I say I don't want that, but what if I do?

They both held broken hearts, Ajax after being rejected way too many times because he was a gorgon and Y/N because she was Y/N.

But these feelings were nothing compared to Y/N's greatest fear.

They all could see right through her.

Wednesday were a specialist in this case, she always knew when Y/N was lying, sad, angry... even if she tried so hard to not express it.

For Wednesday, her sister were simply a piece of glass, one that she could see right through it and knew when it was starting to break, that's why she always made sure that her sister was okay and protected her at all costs.

Even if she never showed it at all.

That's what lead the girl to the present moment.

Y/N stared at her wooden carved miniature knife, it wasn't a weapon, just something she did for fun.

Dragging the knife through the wood, she recalled her last trip on Jericho.

'— HEY, CREEPY SHIT!- a normie shouted and Y/N ignored it, walking straight to her destination, before someone jumped in front of her.

— Where you going freak?- the boy smirked and she turned around, facing other three normies.

— What the fuck do you want?- she said between teeth.

— That's not very nice of you- one of them pouted and Y/N rolled her eyes.

— Nevermore students are not welcomed here, did you know that?- he said and pushed the girl.

— Dude, don't mess with me- she glared.

— Or what? Are you going to turn me into a mouse?- he laughed.

— Fuck off- you pushed him back.

He came to you fuming.'

'cause cruelty wins in the movies.

Even throwing the last punch, Y/N didn't left without bruises and a bloodied nose, she was pretty sure that she pissed the boys and that dread feeling started to follow her around.

— Found you!- her worst fear came true, Ajax smiled while walking to her.

— Hey Jax, what's up?- she asked and the boy sat on her side.

— You good? Didn't saw you in fencing today, it's the only class you never ditched, your sister is fuming around- he frowned and Y/N tried to not look tense, but Ajax could see how her shoulders stiffened and her mouth opened like she wanted to say something.

I've got hundred thrown out speeches I almost said to you.

— Oh right, just got lost in time- she smiled, Ajax stared at her.

— Yeah... right- he raised a brow- You sure about that?

— Yeah, of course! I'm gonna talk with Wednesday later, you coming with me for class?- she raised to her feet and slipped her knife in her boot.

— Oh! Yeah! Totally, Xavier will kill me if I miss this class today anyways- he laughed and the girl smiled.

— Oh I heard about it, our artist is coming for your ass if you ditch again, because I heard that you're the one who forgot that you two had an essay together last week- she teased and Ajax groaned.

— He told you that? Oh come on, it was just one time!- he laughed and took her hand like always.

— Yeah, that one time that happened for a whole month?- she nudged the boy.

Ajax forgot his worries for a minute and just admired the girl.

For those who saw from outside, they swore that the two were a couple, the gorgon and the Addams were completely oblivious if they didn't noticed the love they exhaled whenever they were together.

It was nauseous, according to Wednesday.

Later that day, Y/N were having her sword practices in the forest like always, she just needed to clear her mind and pull her mask again, the one that it was starting to slip.

She never mentioned to her friends and sister how people would choose her to pick one, Wednesday was rough and ten times more skilled than her, so it was easier to aim into Y/N, the one that even though knew how to throw a punch, never got to really hurt someone like Wednesday.

Easy they come, easy they go.

The whispers and laughs always clouded her brain but she always tried to slip into under the carpet, they were just stupid human beings anyways, it wasn't worthy.

I jump from the train, I ride off alone.

But sometimes it got on her skin and she would suffer the consequences of it, like the last trip.

The bruises and cuts pained her, really, they were all tall and tough guys versus one person.

If it was Wednesday, she wouldn't be wincing and crying because of it.

I never grew up, it's getting so old.

— Pathetic- Y/N whispered and attacked the poor tree again, she sighed and took off her jacket, she looked at the bruises and rolled her eyes- Wednesday would be laughing at your face in times like this- she muttered and went back to attacking the tree.

Her thoughts suddenly trailed to Ajax, what would he think of her if he saw her crying over something so idiotic?

Help me hold onto you.

— Oh look who we have here boys- her eyes widened when she heard the voice of one of the normies.

— What the fuck- she whispered and turned around, gripping tightly on her stick, the one she used for trainings so she wouldn't break her sword accidentally.

— I didn't liked the scar you gave me, not a bit- the boy groaned and her eyes darted to his scarred cheek- So guess what? I brought some of my friends to help me- he smirked.

6 boys emerged from behind the trees.

— That's unfair, a coward move, I'm one and you're seven, I don't think this is a fair way to fight- Y/N said with her emotionless face, even though the fear were bubbling up on her brain.

— Did you really think that I would come here without protection? You just happened to be here!- he laughed.

The Addams brought her stick closer, her knuckles almost white with the force she held, they all laughed.

— You really think you can beat us up with this?- he asked.

I've been the archer.

— I had nothing with me earlier and you and your friends have bruises, I don't think you can think so low of me like this- she said with confidence, but inside she was praying that someone would find her right now.

I've been the prey.

Ajax paced in the hallway, sighing he knocked on Enid's door.

— Ajax! Can I help you?- the werewolf smiled.

— Hey Enid, is Wednesday here?- he sighed and the girl frowned.

— Hey Willa! Ajax wants to see you- Enid let the boy walk in.

— Speak- Wednesday said and put her book down.

— Sorry Wednesday, but have you seen Y/N? It's been hours since our last class and she completely vanished- the boy panicked.

Who could ever leave me, darling?

— She was supposed to be here for now, her sword time always lasts 1 hour- Wednesday said and took her boots.

— WHAT??- Ajax widened his eyes.

— Hurry, she is in the woods and by her lateness, she must be in danger- Wednesday said and pulled out a knife, Enid ran to get it from her hands- It's my sister, if someone or something dared to scratch her knee it should die- she glared at Enid.

— Seriously Wednesday, you need to stop this! How many knifes you have hidden?- Enid panicked and Wednesday ignored her, stuffing the item inside of her boot.

— Fuck it! Come on you two!- Ajax ran through the door.

But who could stay?

— Hey Ajax, found Y/N?- Kent smiled to the boy who ignored him and ran even faster, the sire frowned and next saw Enid running behind Wednesday who was stomping quickly- Did he fucked up or something?- he asked but again was ignored by the two- Dude what the fuck- he whined.

Ajax pushed the branches while he ran through the forest.

— Y/N?- he shouted and finally heard something, his heart raced, he followed the sound.

Dark side, I search for your dark side.

— STOP IT! YOU FUCKING FUCK!- he heard Y/N shouting and he quickened his pace.

— Y/N!- he shouted again.

He pushed some leaves away and his eyes widened at the sight, the group circling the girl who had blood everywhere and used a wood stick to get one of them out from her.

Ajax quickly ran and pushed the boys hardly.

— WHAT THE FUCK MAN!- he screamed angrily, he went behind Y/N and pulled the girl to him, she stumbled but held his shirt, her hands trembling in fear and pain.

— Oh great! Another freak!- one of them laughed and Y/N tried to get even closer to Ajax's body, his arm wrapped tightly around her waist.

But what if I'm all right, right here?

— Hey, don't touch her again, got it?- Ajax said between teeth.

— Or what?- he smirked and went to pull Y/N again, the girl panicked and Ajax quickly covered her eyes and pulled out his beanie.

The boy stoning in place, all the others quickly covering their eyes.

— I said to don't touch her- he said slowly and covered his snakes.

— Who is next?- Wednesday's voice echoed, her pupils darkened, she held a knife and a cruel smirk on her face.

— Shit!- all of them quickly ran away and Ajax slowly let go of Y/N and looked at her in worry.

The girl had cuts and dark bruises all around her body and face, the so shiny eyes he loved completely fogged in fear.

— Y/N?- he whispered and she looked up.

'cause they see right through me, they see right through me.

Her eyes slowly watered up while she saw how worried Ajax looked at her.

Can you see right through me?

— Hey sweetheart...- he whispered so gently while kneeling down as her legs started to fail.

They see right through. They see right through me.

She looked around and Wednesday were looking at her, something came in her eyes.

Worry.

— Y/N, what happened?- she asked and let go of the knife, kneeling in front of her sister.

I see right through me.

Than everything hit Y/N all at once, her head was screaming at her, how could she be so weak?

All the king's horses and all the king's men.

She tried so hard to not let the tears go, but looking at her sister in front of her who were really starting to panic while analyzing the girl, she broke down.

Couldn't put me together again.

— I'm sorry- she whispered and they all looked at her.

— Sorry? Why are you sorry love? You did nothing wrong- Ajax pushed the hair out of her face, not caring about the blood that dirtied his clothes.

— I'm so weak- she whispered- If I was like Wednesday, it wouldn't...- Wednesday quickly cut her.

— Don't you dare to complete this sentence- she said in all seriousness- You and me know very well that battles need to be clean and fair, this one was full of dirtiness and cowardice, even the dead know that fact- she wiped the tears away from Y/N's face- They were seven, you were one, does this sound like a fair battle for you?- she asked.

— No, but...- Wednesday glared and she immediately stopped.

— There is no 'but's' Y/N, by their faces though, I know that you fought back and you fought good- she smirked- You're an Addams, no Addams go down without throwing the last punch, that's what our father said- she said and Y/N smiled softly.

Their eyes were aimed towards the sound of something breaking, Enid kicked the rocks of once a head of a boy.

Their eyes widened in surprise.

Enid turned and her face went red.

— What? He was a coward! And I don't like people who hurt Y/N, we can just... you know? Use his dust as... fertilizer? Imagine it works like bone meal? You know? Minecraft and everything...- she smiled sheepishly.

You smiled and couldn't help but let out a laugh.

Who could stay?

Ajax cleaned Y/N's face with a wet cloth, his eyes always searching her just to make sure she was still there with him.

— You know, I thought you were a complete badass in the woods today- he whispered cautiously- I always thought you were a badass but... I don't know man, seeing you beat someone with a wood stick it's... really amazing- he said.

— He was asking for it, let's be honest- she said and he chuckled.

— Yeah, he totally was- Ajax looked at her arms- How long?- he asked.

— What?- the girl whispered.

— I... well, let's be honest, we all noticed how your eyes and face changed whenever we went to Jericho or someone passed by us here in Nevermore... so.. how long they've been treating you like this?- he asked.

— Oh- was the only thing that left her mouth- You know... everyone is scared of Wednesday, it was always like this, no one mess with Wednesday but you can mess with Y/N, it's not like she will do something- she whispered and Ajax listened close- At first, you ignore it, but then... it really starts to get on your skin, your brain, your thoughts, it starts to get to you- Ajax put the cloth down and stepped close to the girl.

He was right between her legs so he had an easy access for her wounds and could properly treat them.

— I just thought that... I don't know, if I was more like Wednesday nothing would've happened and I wouldn't have worried you, Weds, our friends...- she trailed.

— Now, it's where you stop because you're speaking nonsense- Ajax sighed- Y/N, you're like the strongest person I've ever met! You're so cool and... you know, you! I mean, you managed to be Bianca's friend and we all agree that this is a really hard thing to do- he joked and they both chuckled- Don't think so low of yourself, you're the one who knows how to handle every single sword, knife and pointy things around the world- you smiled- But you achieved like, the most impossible things in the world like, melting Wednesday's heart or making Enid kill someone, because you're you!- he caressed her soft skin.

— I don't need a Wednesday in my life, I need a Y/N, my Y/N, my girl, the one I've always trusted and liked- he smiled- I need you, you don't need to change for anyone, because I promise, I will always be there to protect you from now on- he kissed her forehead.

Y/N smiled and leaned on his touch, her arms circling his waist while he did the same with her, they simply stayed there and enjoyed each other's warmth.

They didn't need to speak out loud, they both knew that feeling.

Love.

You could stay.

[love-hatred-stuff]

solo

》genre: friends to lovers(?) Idk, just fluff and angst and more fluff

⚠warning(s): reader's fuck girl -ish, mentions of alcohol, buck likes to have his heart broken lol

A/n: excuse any mistakes pls, have fun reading^^

All he can do is watch. He wishes he could do more about it, but he couldn't. Instead he balled his hands into fists with all his strength, while having to watch the scene in front of him. It's torture seeing you how you let some random other dude, who isn't even anywhere near you league, touch you all over while having your tounge tangled in each other's mouths. He could explode just at the mere thought of that.

All the while you knew that he was watching from that corner of the room like he always was, like a protective brother, he always took care of you. Though I might be a bit concerning how he didn't let you two be in a separate room even for a minute when you were in public, especially on parties.

And you liked it, you knew it was fucked up a bit, but you enjoyed having your very much so attractive best friend hauk you like dog. Even though you made out with others every now and then, you never looked for anything serious with anyone, just some decent hookups. Which wasn't very difficult finding, since the boys around town always fawned over you, bucky could only agree, but he hated it more than anything.

You were aware of the fact that he saw you as more than a friend, you always noticed the jealousy in his eyes when you told him about your flings.

Even just now, the furious look towards the boy that was holding himself against you was hard to go unnoticed. You stopped kissing the boy and smiled, telling him you have to leave now before putting his hands off you and without much acknowledging his protests you made your way towards the other side of the room. Where your overprotective best friend stood, his emotionless eyes still lingering on your hookup.

You gifted him a kind smile while approaching him.

"Sorry for letting you wait so long, James." You took his hand and gave him a short kiss on the cheek, being the playful girl you always were.

Slowly then his gaze drifted towards you, smiling back at you gently.

"That's okay, you know I only stay because of you anyways." He forgot about the other boy and found himself lost in your eyes that glowed up at him. The grip of your hand in his made him feel so much better already. Though he still knew in the back of his head, you would be leaving him on the next party to find someone to fondle with. It definitely bothered him more than it should as a best friend, but he couldn't help it, you had him wrapped around your finger.

Except for subtle touches and kisses he knew he couldn't be asking for more anytime soon, so he just settled with the idea of protecting you from heartbreaks and other men for the rest of time. He was glad that you at least weren't interested in a real boyfriend yet, he wouldn't be able to stand the fact that even the little moments you showed him affection would be gone and forbidden then.

He loved you endlessly and he told you that before but he thought you just always assumed he meant platonic kind of love, causing him to just forget about the chance of you feeling the same for him.

"So let's go? Will you bring me home and tuck me to bed please? I'm drunk and tired." You giggled at him sweetly.

He could never refuse to take care of you. He would always have you as his priority.

"Of course. But I want a reward." He smirked playfully. He was kidding. It was reward enough being the one to bring you home from a night out.

"If you insist. But I'll decide later what I give you! Now let's go, I'm getting cold." You gripped his hand tighter and began to lead him the way out.

"No wonder, you are only wearing that little dress, I told you to cover up, so you won't get cold!" He spoke while walking with you, sounding more serious now.

"No, you just tell me to cover up so boys don't look at me." You let out a small laugh.

"And so you don't get cold." He added.

"Shut up and drive me home. Please and thank you." You two were outside now standing infront of his car. You gave him another kiss on the cheek before walking around it and letting yourself fall into the passenger seat, not without a bit of stumbling of course but you managed.

"Jesus, you are so lucky to have me." He commented before starting the engine and driving off to your house.

The care ride was mostly silent, only soft music playing in the background and you dozing off to it.

"Y/n we're here." He woke you gently.

With a small groan you opened your eyes, them being sensitive so you had to blink some more before adjusting to the light of the car.

"Carry me, Buck, please?" You started begging tiredly.

So without much complain he lifted you from the seat and closed the car door, carrying you inside the house, into your room.

"Thankssss. Love you!" You smiled with closed eyes, already laying in your bed.

"Lay with me." You mumbled, raking your arms in his direction and making room for him next to you.

It was routine, most times you wanted him to stay the night to have someone next to you while sleeping, he would be gone most mornings but that was okay since you sobered up then.

"Not tonight." He grumbled. He really couldn't do it tonight. He felt needy and he didn't want you to feel uncomfortable if he did something impulsive and inappropriate. That's the least he could do, out of respect to your boundaries.

"Why not? I promise I won't kick you this time!" You eyes were now open, being a bit surprised by his answer.

He never denied you before. You thought he liked you?

"Don't make me explain it to you. You should sleep now. We'll see each other tomorrow if you want."

"Please! Please, please!" Suddenly you had enough strength to stand up and grab his arm, pulling him towards you and the bed.

"Take my clothes off please, I can't do it." You whined.

"No I can't. I'm not supposed to do that for you. I'm trying to be a gentleman here, don't you understand?" He wouldn't budge.

"Fine!" You pulled your mini dress off your head and sighed before falling backwards back into bed.

It gave Bucky a full view of your body, you were still wearing underwear but that didn't do much for his bad conscience. The needy thoughts were still creeping inside his head and they were now even harder to ignore.

"What are you doing Y/n?" He whisper-yelled.

"Tuck me in." You comanded, smiling.

"Are you serious?" He asked, not wanting to believe that you would let him touch you in this state.

"Yes, my God! I'm too tired to move." You weren't really tired anymore you just wanted his hands on you.

He didn't say anything anymore and gave in (gladly). You felt the spark when he touched your waist, shoving you in the right position.

Shortly before he wanted to lay the blanket on top of you, you stopped him.

You took his hand, with closed eyes you whined. "Touch me more." Sighing after you made it sound so sensually and Bucky was going crazy now. His mind foggy with desperation and desire.

"This isn't a good idea." He tried to withstand you.

"You now it's the best idea I've ever had, James. Please."

"I can't just do that. You're half asleep and have alcohol in your system." He protested.

After that you didn't say anything anymore. And after those minutes of silence, although you wanted to continue with him, you were just as tired and fell asleep soon after.

He watched you fall asleep, finally putting that blanket to cover you.

Bucky left a few moments after. Not being able to look at you in an innocent way. He wanted to touch you. So badly even but he couldn't do that to you, not in this state of mind. He just hoped you weren't mad at him now. Which you were. You called him the moment you woke up the next morning with an empty bed side.

He took his phone, muttering "shit" because he knew you wouldn't be happy.

"James Buckanan Barnes!? Are you kidding me? You just left me like that? That's not what I taught you, I thought you had manners!" You sounded quite disappointed.

"I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you. I can pick you up in five and take you to a café for breakfast. Would you like that?" He tried, hoping you would give in.

"How about no? You don't deserve to take me out today. I'll find someone else to spend my day with. I'll hang up now, bye." And you were gone.

Amazing. That's not how he had planned his day. He didn't like or rather disguised it when he knew you were going out with someone else and he wasn't anywhere near you to watch the situation. And now it seemed like he had nothing to do. He was looking forward to spend the sunday with you. He always does. But he hated it when you refused to talk to him, you always gave him the silent treatment and let me tell you it worked on him everytime, got him to his knees sometimes even, just for you.

It made him realise how much control you had over him but didn't mind at the same time, he couldn't do anything against it so he just continued to enjoy your company.

But things were different when you were ignoring him. He suddenly felt his heart clench. Even if it wasn't something that would made you leave him completely, you were just a little bit disappointed. Bucky still felt like shit, his feelings for you making it not easier for him. After all you two were so close that you had to see each other every day, which wasn't very hard since you saw him in school and he didn't live far away from you.

Buck tried keeping himself occupied but after an hour he always found himself dialling your number to call you, so he could apologise again. Not one time you picked up and it made him go insane, thinking about what you might be doing without his knowledge.

He knew you liked to go on dates, play with someone's heart every now and then, only if they deserved it enough of course, you weren't just some horny kid. You had fun getting to know new people, show yourself to the world. You enjoyed yourself doing that, but it was even more fun when you had a best friend who would protect you from men and their flaws, their egos, and someone who would jealousy stare at you a few feet away from you the whole night long while you flirted with all the people around you, girls where not a no go, you picked who peeked your interest.

Though you never slept with anyone. You weren't searching for that kind of intimacy. Honestly was Bucky the only man you really trusted since you've lost your virginity.

•••

As soon as it was about evening, Bucky made his way to your house, internally begging for you to be there and let him make it up to you.

With a bouquet of tulips he ringed the doorbell. Your parents weren't there most of the time, so you were home alone once again. Now having to answer the door, not knowing what surprise what awaiting you.

As you opened the door, you revealed your handsome friend with an apologetic smile on his lips.

"Hey, doll, would you let me in so I can apologise?" He asked hopefully.

You blinked at him a few times.

"Yeah come in I guess." He could sense you weren't quite in the mood today.

"Let's got upstairs." You suggested quickly.

In your room, Bucky started to grab your hands to have you closer to him without overstepping any boundaries.

"Please? I'm sorry and I know that wasn't a gentleman move but I just didn't wanna make you uncomfortable when you remember what your drunk self did last night. I thought it would be better if I deny your affection for your own well being. I don't think you know how much you affect me sometimes." He started to regret his words just after speaking them.

You just looked at him for a moment, a bit baffled.

"I know. But we can't continue like this." James' heart stopped at that. What did you even mean by that?

No, he didn't want that.

"What? No–" He started and grabbed your hands again, leading them to his chest gently.

"James... I thought you cared about me more than that." You glowing eyes looked up at him, messing with his head once again.

"I do– I, please, Y/n. I care about you so much, you know that." He promised, beginning to get a little desperate. You found it simply cute how eager he was to please you and convince you he had good intentions.

"Stay with me next time then, alright?" You asked, acting clueless and innocent.

"Yes, of course. I'm sorry, again–"

You pulled your hands away from him, making him stop in his train of thoughts.

The feeling of you denying your affection now towards him was just as the angsty feeling he felt when you had ignored him the whole day.

"I should teach you a lesson, don't you think? I'm bored. Sorry, you know I get mean when I'm bored." You let out a puffed laugh, finding it amusing how dumbfounded he now looked.

"No, I learned my lesson already. Let's do something else that might help with your boredom. You've ignored me enough today." He stated, trying hard not to sound to affected by your actions.

"Yeah you think that? Who said I ignored you? Maybe I've just had a really good date." Oh you so knew what you were doing.

His gaze dropped, being reminded of the other many people that tried getting your attention. And in your head you had the biggest, most amused smiled dancing on your lips as you saw how he reacted. But you kept your facade.

"Come on, we both know no one will be as good as a company to you as I am." He proudly whispered.

You scoffed at him.

"Don't test the waters. You know I have my ways of keeping you an arm length away it I want to. If that's what you want, so be it. And thanks for asking, I actually had an amazing time today." A bitter-sweet smile adorned your lips.

"Don't. Don't try and push me away because I said something I didn't think about enough. I'm sorry. Tell me how I can make it up to you." Bucky grasped for your hands again, but you stepped back instantly, making him feel what he made you feel yesterday night and the following morning.

"Let's just not talk about it anymore, okay? Besides, I didn't asked you to come, you can leave now." It was probably your hormones but now you were just so mad at him.

James let out a disagreeing whine. Starting to get anxious more and more.

"No, I'm not leaving. Not with this ending. Just let me take you somewhere nice. I love you, Y/n, and I'm not leaving you like this."

"Yesterday you didn't have much of a problem leaving me either! What's the big deal? I don't want to discuss this with you anymore. I want to be alone." You told him cold heartedly.

"No!" He slightly raised his voice now. Seeing you so cold towards him was the biggest pain he'd felt in a while and it was killing him when he thought of being separated from you because of such a stupid thing.

"This is not how we end things. We never do, we always compromise." Buck tried to calm himself down again.

"But I don't feel like compromising!" Your teary eyes met his.

"You can't leave me." He now calmly said, more to himself than to you really.

"I'm not. I just want a time out. It's not healthy how we depend on each other. I should learn to take care of myself, I see that now." You sat down on you bed, playing with the few rings on your fingers.

"Of course it's healthy. We're best friends and we're always there for each other, that's normal." Bucky disagreed. He would never leave you and always be there when you needed him. Even when you had boyfriends for a short period of time, he always was there. Most of them had a problem with that, being the reason you often told them he was your cousin or brother or something. Being friend zoned like that hurt but he got used to it by now.

"But how will I ever learn to live by myself?" You shook your head.

"You're being really unreasonable right now. You know it's not a good reason to ignore me." He stepped in again, as he was done playing games.

"Just leave. We'll see each other tomorrow." You suddenly seemed drained of energy, which you were, you didn't wanna continue fighting with Bucky. You loved him so much and it made you sad thinking about you'll have to push him away someday. You wouldn't be able to stand it if he met someone else or something like that.

Of course you knew you were being incredibly selfish here, you meeting up with other people constantly and him always refraining from doing so as he would rather spend time with you. But you couldn't say that he ever complained about anything. You guessed he just got used to it and felt responsible. Besides that you were actually scared he might find someone better than you. Someone more grateful, someone who deserved his love and care.

"If you really want me go, fine. But promise me, yout won't avoid me tomorrow." He argued, his voice sounding gentle though because he could sense how tired you were.

"Promise." You groaned and rubbed your sleepy eyes.

"I'll pick you up then." Bucky took a few steps forward to you again, wanting some kind of contact from you.

"No need, I can drive myself." Your voice was almost a whisper now.

"Nope, I'd rather pick you up. Come on, give me a hug please?" He slightly pouted and took your hand in his.

You only shook your head no.

Bucky didn't know how to make you happy again. Usually he always did, though you've also never acted like this.

"Why? What's on your mind doll?" He carefully asked, caressing your hair softly.

You now looked at him and he saw how glossy your eyes were. What got you so upset?

"Are you meeting someone else?" It was a simple question but suddenly it all made sense to him.

"Absolutely not. Why are you asking me that? You know I spend all my free time with you." He assured you calmly.

"Are you sure? Not even a crush on someone?" You were eager to know, why else would he deny his affection like he did last night?

He hesitated. Well, he had one, a big fat one, on you. Not just a crush though, he had loved you ever since you got so close, which you've been since years.

"No, I mean nothing's more important to me than our friendship. You know I'll always love you most." Bucky gave you a warm smile.

"So you don't like anyone? Why did you act like that yesterday then? You know I trust you, and you trust me, don't you? I just wanted you to cuddle me a give me some love. I know I seem to get a lot attention from other guys but that's nothing compared to our bond. Because at the end of the day I'll only thing of you, no one else, I promise. I just like to keep myself busy. You know how I am." You slowly began to smile back at him.

"Oh Y/n. I'm so sure, I don't like anyone else. And I appreciate you just the way you are, always have. And trust me, I'll never find anyone better. I'm even more sure of that." He answered you and finally got the hug he wanted in return. Breathing in you scent he wished he could stay like that forever, hold you in his arms at all times.

"I really love you, James. I hope you know that." You breathed onto his shoulder.

"I love you more than you know, Y/n. And I will always want to take care of you. Even if I can only watch you, I will do it with pleasure." You giggled at that and slowly let him loose again.

"You should consider it's basically stalking. But it's okay, I don't mind. As long as it's you I don't mind being stalked." You winked playfully at him.

"I should hope so." Oh how bad he wished he would be able to call you his, grab your waist and kiss you right now.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" You hopefully asked.

"You think that's a good idea?" Bucky raised a brow.

"I do. Besides, I wouldn't accept a no this time." You mumbled and begin to scratch the t-shirt off you. Bucky being ready to look the other way. Not because he wouldn't like the view but because he would like the view.

The shirt being off you, you walked towards your closet, taking your bra off in the process. The second he saw your bare back that was facing him, his mind began to wander, having thoughts he wasn't supposed to be having.

"Why do you always do that?" He asked, in the heat of the moment and because he just couldn't think straight right now.

You found a white crop top and covered yourself up before turning to him. Well it was basically revealing your chest to him because of how thin the material was but you really didn't care, if it got a reaction out of him, good, it was serving it's purpose.

"Do what?" You laced your voice with the perfect amount of innocence.

"Change in front of me." He sighed.

"I don't know. I just really don't care, it's nothing you haven't seen on other girls before. I am not standing naked here right now so... Does it matter? I just wanna sleep."

"I've seen girls before. But that's definitely not the same. But nevermind, you're right, let's sleep." He gave in, trying to forget about it.

Bucky also got lost of his flannel and shoes. Making himself comfortable in your bed, so you could lay on him, just as comfortable. What was exactly what you did.

And in each other's arms, you fell asleep.

[bookscandlesnbts]

It's confirmed Jisoo and her actor bf broke up after 3 months of dating because of busy schedule. Just 3 months. This is the reality of kpop relationships especially if they both are celebs. Mostly it's hookups but if they somehow get past that stage it usually lasts from 2 months - 1 - 2 years. There there's shippers believing Jimin and JK are in a relationship for past 5-6 years ? Even if shippers are dumb and ignorant of reality, I don't think JK and JM are. When they can literally have anyone they want they are NOT chosing to stay with a single person for their whole life. Please let's be real.

Now I'm wondering whether the woman with JK in apt was indeed his gf but ex. It happened in Feb- March period. It was leaked after 5 months. Probably he broke up before that so he didn't lied when he said he doesn't have a gf and just wanna focus on work now. Remember he wasn't doing any work then. Whether it was ex or not, this is the reality of kpop relationships now you decide whether you wanna believe these two young men, who are busy af and have ton of other options, is choosing to stay with each other.

Oh anon y’all gotta stop being so corny 🤣 why would someone stay in a relationship for 5-6 years? Why? Idk anon maybe they are in love and have a special bond with one person. Love exists. Happy monogamous relationships of all sexual orientations exist. I might not be in one and maybe never will but I’m not cynical like you. Damn. Maybe that person makes them happy. Not everyone is promiscuous and wanting one night stands and causal hook ups. Y’all need to stop watching dramas or thinking through a western lens or thinking that you “know” the kpop industry or whatever y’all are doing because it’s really silly.

I don’t follow the BlackPink members. I don’t care who they date or what they do. Tbh, I don’t follow most celebs. The only celebs I’ve really cared about are BTS.

There is nothing to wonder. JK debunked it. The footage was grainy. The apartment wasn’t the same. The man was unidentifiable wearing a mask, and the woman was clearly pregnant. But sure, she was JK’s ex so that means he has a whole ass kid now 🤣 the side eye I’m giving you is so real. 🙄

Being busy doesn’t mean that you can’t be in a stable relationship. And since you are so skeptical anon, maybe their “busy schedules” wasn’t the reason Jisoo and that guy broke up. Maybe she ended up not liking him and that’s the most amicable way to explain a break up. There are so many explanations.

You aren’t a jikooker. That much is clear. You are the type wanting to believe that Jungkook is straight so you are latching onto whatever fantasy puts him in the vicinity of dating a woman. This is a Jikook blog for those that believe that they are in a happy, loving long term relationship. I probably should have blocked you, but this was too goofy to not give a response. I’m not the one ignorant of reality. I saw Jimin’s live yesterday where Jungkook made an appearance. More information could be gathered about the nature of Jikook’s bond from that two minute interaction than your whole narrative based on a broken up heterosexual relationship. I watched Jimin’s doc and paid attention to the lyrics and the significance of Jungkook being on Letter, a hidden track on an album very personal to Jimin’s life story. I watched them flirting on live throughout this year, Jimin saying that he can handle Jungkook laying in bed half naked. I watched Jungkook gush over Jimin for 90 minutes straight with hearts in his eyes. Anon, did you? If you haven’t, maybe you should and stop coming up with nonsense based theories. Jungkook isn’t the manwhore of the kpop industry that you want him to be. He’s a queer man in love with his bandmate until proven otherwise. And by proof, I mean actual proof not a grainy video that he himself debunked. Give it up already.

[a-b-riddle]

Hey, i hope you've had a good day so far/will have a good day. And i hope you get better soon <3

Im sorry if this is considered trauma dumping and if u wanna ignore this, totally understandable ! Im just very very lost and idk what to do so i thought it wouldn't hurt to ask for advice ?

Im about to be 25 y/o in july and ive only had one relationship (circa 2019) that lasted a year and then fizzled out (i found out later that it was bcz i was getting cheated on) and I haven't met anyone or connected with anyone ever since. I moved into a new city too after finishing university and i have no friends or social circle in this new town (i still keep in contact with my friends from my old city but it kinda feels like every relationship i have is slowly dying) and i feel like I'm stuck in this limbo place where no matter how much i try i always feel like life is passing by infront of my eyes and i haven't lived it yet (idk if that makes sense) so i was wondering if you have any advice how get out this mindset ?

Thank you for at least reading this if u did, im sorry if i triggered you or if i burdened you with my feelings, and i wish you all the best ❤️

I met my now fiance a little under four weeks before I turned 25. Before him, I had gotten my heart broken and I was just done with hooking up with someone and expecting more, but that meant not being in the same phase as my friends who still wanted that.

When we started dating I had to come to face the hard reality that not all of my friendships were healthy and not everyone I was friends with were people I should have in my life for more than a season. So I had to sit and take a hard look at my life. Keep these college friends I've had for almost four years... Or start from scratch?

So starting from scratch, I started with one person. My fiance. I liked him. I respected his morals and his ethic. I loved how kind he was to others and always the one to lend a hand. So with him, I made friends with his friends and their girlfriends. Because my fiance was a good person, he often kept the same company.

So with him I found people that I could see having in our lives for more than just a season. Through loss and triumphs. To celebrate and to grieve with.

Now I'm using my fiance just as an example, but you don't need a romantic partner to do this. You can start with one person. And even if it doesn't go beyond that, you still have a person. You still made one new connection with another soul that you wouldn't have done before.

My dad found his own community with his coworkers. My mom found hers with those who have lost a child. My sister found hers in cosplay. My other sister found hers with those who had the same area of study. I found friends through a facebook group that loved the ACOTAR series that lived in my major city. I found one of my closest friends on bumble bff.

Unfortunately, relationships are the hardest things in life we will ever have to work for because it's not just about creating them, but maintaining them, and enriching them with personal experiences to help them grow. We just assume since they had come so easily when we were in tight knit circles like high school and college they come easily.

But as adults, we have to find new ways to engage and that is a scary thing to do when it's not something we've done before. So the first step to stop existing and start living is to connect.

Volunteer. Join clubs. Reach out. Engage. As someone who has a constant fear of being rejected, it is terrifying. But the worst thing anyone can ever say to you is no. The world won't stop. You'll survive it. Buy from it, you move on.

Another recommendation I have is to listen to The Last Lecture.

It is an hour long, but the ending always gets me. Basically lecturers at Carnegie Mellon would give "last lectures." It was the last lecture they would give working in academics at the university. When asked what his Last Lecture would be about Professor Randy Pausch basically said, "funny you should ask. I have pancreatic cancer and have about six months left so this really is my last lecture."

[laurasauras]

3,20,38

3. Is there a trope you wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole?

whenever i find myself thinking like this, it usually prompts me to go, okay, so how do i make it work.

the easy example is hanahaki--it's always been a trope that's annoyed me because it feels like weaponised victimhood and i couldn't get past how shitty the target of hanahaki would feel. so one day i come across it and i get to thinking, okay smartass, you do it better then! and from that i wrote two fics and an rp about characters who got hanahaki for people they both really didn't want to have it for and who couldn't have the surgery. i wanted to see what it'd be like if i gave it the highest stakes i could think of, and i think Excise My Broken Heart (unrequited daverose) is one of the best things i've written

in terms of ones i haven't done and really can't see myself doing though, pregnancy freaks me the fuck out so i don't think i could write anything more detailed than a tacky gender reveal party without getting squicked. and despite using 2nd person constantly due to the homestuck of it all, i find y/n fics to be tooooo ... idk directed? i don't have a problem with people reading my fics and getting off or with getting off while imagining themselves as the characters, but i'm not writing to get people off. not my cuppa tea! even in my porniest you better believe there's a character observation i'm proud of making!

20. Describe your perfect writing conditions.

okay so when i want to write i make myself a cup of tea/milo or boozy beverage of my choice, get in comfy clothes and sit where i always sit (my armchair, probably cross-legged) with all the things that give off notifications exited out of so i can't see the (1) of it all. i'm not hungry, i've taken my meds and i've had a shower recently enough that i'm not distracted by hygiene

when i need to write, same thing except i'm listening to Alive 2007, daft punk's live album where they mash up a bunch of their songs. it is magic for making me focus

38. Talk about a review that made your day.

one that i still think about is from Yet Another Crisis, where roxy is making her bad mental health everyone else's problem as well, which was a vent fic about my brother acting out before anyone knew he was trans. a commenter said that it really resonated with them, i shared the inspiration and they were like welp, that's why it resonated! they said, "I suspect I'm going to end up sharing this fic with my therapist, and maybe even my mother someday when she's ready to listen" and i will never stop thinking about how something i wrote was meaningful enough that someone feels that by sharing it, they can be known better. nothing tops that!

i actually keep a doc (that i always forget to update) with comments that have particularly made me smile. i'm fortunate enough to get a lot and i treasure them all, but some of them deserve to be squirreled away for days when i need to be reminded that my art has impact on people and by doing something i love, i have brought happiness (and a whole bunch of other emotions) to wonderful people 💛

[elsfairy]

➝ 𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒. (I'm just fucking emo, here)

You always felt like you didn't fit in anywhere. Even from the ages of 10+ you never felt like no one wanted you around. It was sad, actually. Being told by all the children you wished would let you join in with their games, that you were just boring and you were just weird.

The amount of times you've tried to remove those memories from your brain was easier said than done. You weren't a kid anymore, you were living your life. A life you sometimes wished would be easier. A life you wished sometimes just.. stopped. That was your feelings a few years go. Sometimes those thoughts crept up into your mind, even if you tried to not let them.

Then there is Sevika. Someone you trusted more than yourself. You never trusted yourself. Fuck, you didn't even trust your own family but you trusted her. You trusted her with everything you have.

❝You've been quiet for the past few days, is something bothering you?❞

It was a question you've always been asked, yet ignored because you trusted them more than your own answer. Always being told no one cared enough to listen to you. She knew you didn't go well with talking about your feelings, but she asked you everyday to make sure you were truly okay.

❝Is it the same thing as the other night?❞

Your girlfriend didn't have to try hard to find out what what was bothering you. She could always tell by the way you looked at her, either on the verge of tears, or anger. You were sad because no one has loved you like she does. No one has given you a chance like she has. You were angry because of how upset and broken you felt. Of being treated like something someone throws away after using it once.

❝I don't feel good enough Vika❞

No matter how upset you became, she was instantly right there with you. Holding you, stroking your hair and reassuring you that you were more than enough. That you are worth fighting for. She hated how broken they made you feel, how fragile you've become because of being pushed away. How used you feel.

❝I know that you don't believe me but, I mean it when I tell you that you are perfect the way you are. Any bad day you have, I'm going to be right here, telling you that you're doing perfectly fine. I will be here to let you know that im proud of you and I love you❞

You never had a chance to interject with your own arguments because she didn't let you. Sevika didn't like the way you spoke about yourself. She refused to listen to you put yourself down. She didn't see you that way. She's always seen you as strong, caring, gentle, kind, amazing. Even if you did deal with your own problems, to her you were strong because you are still here. You are still here, with her.

❝Vika⎯❞

❝Don't do that. Do not say that you're not good enough. You've always been good enough. You're always going to be enough. You're worth it. You are allowed to love, you are allowed to be loved. Do you know why? because i love you. I love you so much and it breaks my heart when you think these things. You are my weakness, but you're also my happiness and i need you here. I will go through every single bad day with you if it means i still wake up with you in my arms. I need you here, do you get it? i cannot be without you, but i hate how broken they've made you feel.❞

Sevika wasn't a crier, but when it came to you she's crying with you and for you. She wasn't ever worried about how tight you were holding onto her, it was more that she was scared you were going to pass out from how much you cry. Years of struggles and worries bottled up until you can't handle it. That's what scared her the most when you cried.

❝I'll never hurt you, Sweetheart. I will murder anyone who tries to hurt you. I will do anything and everything to make you feel safe. I will always protect you, even on your good days. As long at it means you are still here when i wake up, because i love you❞

❝i love you❞

idk, i listened to some sad song and came up with this.

[kaddyssammlung]

SH - related Sleep Token lyrics Part 1

Let's do this.

To me many things are very obvious and I feel SH is a big theme in all of this so that's the next topic I want to well....what do I want?! Deal with?! Idk.

Lately my mood is very stable and I feel strong enough to deal with this topic.

Obvious TW (you know I get graphic sometimes but with words only)

The Offering

“You've got diamonds for teeth, my love So take a bite of me, just once,”

I'm hung up on this. It's sounds so cool and yet I would like to know how he came up with this. I mean diamonds for teeth....

Other then that it makes me think about having a desire to get hurt by someone. This is something that I didn't really have but I can see why this is. When you are in emotional pain you can reach a point where you try everything to get rid of that pain.

I also get that this has something sexual to it. I mean you know what I mean BDSM stuff.

“This is a given, an offering In your favour, a sacrifice in your name”

Sometimes I ask myself what type of sacrifice he means. I do think about stuff like that a lot sometimes but I'd rather not talk about that.

It makes me think about something very personal. I have someone's name “written” on me. It's barley noticeable anymore but it was the name of my best friend (or rather BPD obsession fave person type of friend). I don't remember what had happened but I ended up cutting her name into my lower abdomen. I was drunk when I did that and I was also very drunk when I told her what I did.

Levitate

“Remember my cracking bones”

I remember one incident where I was so angry that I made a really strange move and ended up punching my floor with my hands. I did hear something crack but I don't remember if something was broken or not. Probably not but my finger looked really weird for a long time and did hurt like hell but it went away and no I did not seek help.

I had no idea how to explain this to someone. My fear of being locked up against my will is very big (we don't really have a 5051 here or something like being sectioned...our rules are not very strict when it comes to certain things but the fear is there and it still can happened or could have happened).

Dark Signs

“The new scars that I didn't ask for”

This a weird one when you really think about it. How does anyone ever ask for scars?! I know that when I do certain things that it will leave scars. I know what they will look like before I even do it. You just know. It depends on the objects that you use and how deep the wound is.

I don't even want to think about what it would be like if this left no scars. I don't have to think about that because it does leave scars.

Idk what to make of this any other then maybe there was an accident that left scars or maybe he actually means metaphorical scars.

Because trauma certainly leaves those.

“tear my arms off”

Each time I hear this I feel a sting in my heart. I just feel this.

I preferred my thighs over my arms though because it's easier to hide the scars there.

Higher

“the blood and the fury takes us a little higher”

I'm sorry Vessel but this a weird one and I don't really get it. Do you like fighting? Or did you just smoke the greens to calm yourself and that's what made you high?!

I don't really like thinking about blood. I'm not grossed out by it but also idk I just don't like thinking about it.

“and we are exhausted by all this pretending we just can't resist the violence”

I often got exhausted by pretending that everything was fine and I took that out on myself. Using self-harm in order to be able to function again. It was only violence against myself. I tell myself that to turn this into something that's okay. But it's not.

Especially when I still went to school I needed that feeling of fresh cuts to make it through the day.

Take Aim

“and you make me hate myself make me tear my body”

It's mostly my ED that me feel like that. I said this before but it belongs in here too: I used to cut when I felt like I had to much to eat. And also I would sometimes gain weight really fast and then I just could not stand looking at myself anymore. I hated my body so much.

“break me apart”

Again that wish to maybe have pain inflicted on you in some way.

Gods

“No more teeth to bite with”

I connect that with getting caught. When my parents found out about my self-harm I was already 18. I had kept this secret for four years. I'm still kind of proud of this. But when you think about it, it does not really help. Of course I continued to hide my struggles with this. Maybe this is one of the reasons why my drinking became more heavily. It left no scars but being drunk is not easy to hide.

“You wanna watch me bleed? 'Cause I bleed so well”

No thank you, Vessel. I believe you.

I put this in here because of the word blood but it's more about relationship dynamics. At least that's how I see this.

“Do you like the way it feels? Like fire from the heavens Carving past the surface into you”

I often felt nothing and even hurting myself did not really change that. But when I did feel and felt like punishing myself and felt what I was doing then I kind of indulged on that burning sensation that it gave me. It was a punishment that I deserved.

“Tearing me asunder beside you”

I just put this in here because it fits the vibe.

Sugar

“We still know how to bleed”

Why does he mention blood or bleeding so often? I was not really aware of that.

This is another weird one. Of course you know how to bleed. I mean I do. We all do. Right?! Let's just leave it at that.

“Addicted to the pain”

Yes, it's an addiction. The way your body can long for stuff like that is kind of impressive but also scary and just feels horrible. It feels like wanting to peel your skin off.

Say That You Will

“Till the sweat turns to blood”

Blood again. I still don't understand this line. The sweat meaning sleeping with someone and then it turns to blood meaning that instead of being nice to each other they start hating each other?! I don't really get it.

I have nothing tied to this.

“Is that a blade in your palm?”

No, Vessel I keep them some other place. I started with scissors that I had in my school bag and then just knives from the kitchen and turned to blades later because I had to buy them and I was a bit scared. Buying blades, band aids and bandages all at once it not really weird at all. No....not at all.

Blood Sport

“Even if the earth breaks like burnt skin”

Right...most humans connect with self-harm certain things. Mostly cutting, I guess. But there are other things such as burning. I never did that. But I did hit myself with a belt that had a buckle on it until my skin would break open. That and I always have quite long fingernails. And they are also really strong. I used to scratch myself or just bury them into my skin.

“I made loving you a blood sport”

Again this reminds me more about relationship dynamics but I can feel that line. My BPD made me do crazy things and self-harm that was related to something that someone else did or did not do was very common.

“You're still my weapon of choosing”

I can feel that. I just feel this.

[clatoera]

Hi bestie pls ignore this if this will like ruin upcoming chapter titles but if you had to assign each main ARWBFB character a song from Taylor’s new album what would you give them? Like which songs would resonate with them or remind you of them etc

Okay bestie this took me literal days, I just listened to the album for three hours on my drive upstate I think i've decided.

Unsurprising to anyone I felt like the album resonated with me more than I expected and ended up practically in a bender for three days so theres that. I was definitely not roaming the streets at 4 am or anything like that on friday morning absolutely nothing of the sort occured.

Surprising everyone even less ist that I largetly heard this and went ah yes. Glimmer. Glimmer again. Clove. Cashmere. Clove. Clove and Cato. etc so theres a RECURRING Theme here okay anyway these are obviously in arwbfb au sooo. This is the whole anthology because I can't listen to only one.

Glimmer

Down bad: Okay I know it sounds like a weird choice but this is giving Glimmer in about chapter 10(?) of ARWBFB but also like this is her general vibe as a victor i think like "For a moment I knew cosmic love" "Fuck it if I can't have him, I might just die it would make no difference." "waking up in blood" "Fuck it if I can't have us/I just not get up." "cause fuck it I was in love, so fuck you if you can't have us." idk it just FEELS right this song has been one I've really liked so!

I can do it with a broken heart: Are you kidding like??? this is not only one of my top 2 songs but also?? it's so perfect. Like it literally says "she's having the time of her life, there in her glittering prime." followed by "I can show you lies." and then we get hit with "Lights, camera, bitch smile even when you wanna die. He said he'd love me all his life but that life was too short breaking down i hit the floor all the pieces of me shattered" I literally am about to list like the entire song but come one "I was grinning like i'm winning I was hitting my marks I can do it with a broken heart." "I'm so depressed, I act like it's my birthday every day." "You know you're good when you can do it even with a broken heart" "Cause I'm miserable and nobody even knows!" Okay literally I beg I plead everyone listen to this song and report back if you think i'm right.

Cashmere and Glimmer both

The Prophecy: This feels like it could be either of them!!! "I got cursed like eve got bitten, oh was it punishment?" "Please I've been on my knees, change the prophecy. Don't want money, Just someone who wants my company. Let it once be me, who do I have to speak to about if they can redo the prophecy." "i'm so afraid I sealed my fate, no sign of soulmates" Idk I think they'd both have similar yearning for a life unlike the one they have where they can get the hell out of this snow induced hell. Change the prophecy of their fate and their lives sort of things.

I hate it here: I gotta be honest I don't think I need to elaborate on this one. Just..listen to this. This is actually any and all victor girls. This is also Finnick. I honestly just suggest we listen to the song and sit with it for a moment as if the title alone is not explanation enough!!!

Cashmere:

Clara Bow:I mean.. "In this light, remarkable, all your life did you know you'd be picked like a rose?" "Take the glory, give everything" this song is all about being compared to the last great thing right, and I think it feels very cashmere to me but in the way that it bleeds into I think when she sings about herself at the end talking about the next big thing to come after her feels very big sister cashmere to me idk! "Beauty is a beast that roars, down on all fours demanding more. ONly when your girlish glow, flickers just so do they let you know?" "It's hell on earth to be heavenly" (Chapter title spoiler fr I heard it and literally pulled out my laptop) Idk it feels right especially because she would know what would come tot he pretty girls after her!!!!!!

But Daddy I love him: OKAY I know this is a werid one but if you think about it not as a MAN who's bad for her but a comp het high society with the expectations of her to be a perfect daughter/woman I think it would make ENTIRE sense for it to be Cashmere but in terms of like...being with women rather than the "wrong man" like in the song idk. I also feel like "I learned these people only raise you to cage you." "they slammed a door on my whole world, the one thing I wanted." "I'd rather burn my whole life down than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning." "i'll tell you something about my good name, it's mine alone to disgrace, I don't care to cater to all these vipers dressed in empath's clothing." Idk It feels RIGHT just LISTEN to it.

Clove

Okay Okay I feel like I got some GOOD ones for her too okay so I want to start out STRONG with a song that screams not only Clove but Cato AND Clove it's my new Clato song...

Fresh out the Slammer: I know I know but come on. I could list EVERY line in this song it's soooo post Clove's games in ARWBFB. "Now pretty baby i'm running back home to you, fresh out the slammer I know who my first call will be to." "Years of labor, locks, and ceiling in the shade of how he was feeling, but it's gonna be alright I did my time." "Camera flashes welcome bashes" "My friends tried but I wouldnt hear it" (being enobaria) "watched me disappearing daily for just one glimpst of his smile, all those nights you kept me going. " "Now we're at the starting line I did my time, now pretty baby i'm running to the house where you still wait up and that porch light gleams, to the one who says i'm the girl of his American dreams... Ain't no way I'm gonna screw up now that I know whats at stake." "At the park where we used to sit on childrens swings wearing imaginary rings, but i's gonna be alright I did my time." SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP It's like Taylor Swift crawled inside my mind as I wrote the first like 5 chapters of ARWBFB and chose to write this because it's them it's them it's soooo them in ARWBFB absolutely noone touch me I felt this was for me personally!!!

AND ANOTHER Clato song is

I can fix him (No really I can): Do I even need to elaborate like "They shale their heads saying God help her when I tell them he's my man. But your good lord doesn't need to lift a finger. I can fix him, no really I can (AND ONLY I CAN???)" "His hand so calloused from his pistol softly traces hearts on my face." "A perfect case for my certain skillset" "Good boy, thats right. Come close i'll show you heaven if you'll be an angel all night." "TRUST ME I CAN HANDLE A DANGEROUS MAN, NO REALLY I CAN."

SHUT UP NO COMMENTS FROM THE PRESS AT THIS TIME y'all

Following THAT up with my FAVORITE SONG ON THE ANTHOLOGY

Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?: SHUT UP AGAIN guys come on this is THE song THE song for me THE song for Clove not only with her like growing up but also the shit Snow did to her>????? "if you wanted me dead you should've just said nothing makes me feel more live." But Also!! "WHOS AFRAID OF LITTLE OLD ME?? YOU SHOULD BE!!!" Thats for CLove! Tiny 5'3 100lb clove!! "I was tame I was gentle till the circus life made me mean." This is for my little baby girl who was not wanted and was raised like this to make her a good little tribute the circus life being the training/panem/career life thank you. "they say they didn't do it to hurt me...I want to snarl and show you how disturbed this has made me. You wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me" The asylum being the academy in this essay I will- "I'm fearsome and i'm wretched and i'm wrong." Special enobaria mention for "don't worry folks we took out all her teeth" tell me "you lured me and you hurt me and you taught me, you caged me and then you called me crazy. I am what I am 'cause you trained me." Are you fucking joking rn i'm sorry i'm once again just quoting the whole song I know.

So Long, London: Okay I know it's a weird take but to me it makes more sense imagining it in regards to her saying goodbye to the District she thought she knew and the idea of the capitol as she knew it you know?? "And i'm just getting color back into my face. I'm just mad as hell 'cause I loved this place." Does it make sense?????? to me it does!!!

The albatross: "She's the albatross. She's here to destroy you. Devils that you know raise hell worse than a stranger. She's the death that you chose. You're in terrible danger." Okay I think it makes sense without me elaborating but it's Clove it's Clove @ Snow who thought she was a perfect victor to compare to Katniss then he TORTURES her and she kills him and yeah she is the death snow chose next question.

Enobaria

Naturally all these songs are about my favorite girlies and yeah so they're all for my girls anyway these are gonna come off weird but i just need you to hear me out on it okay??

The Bolter: I feel like I am dropping Enobaria lore with these things but okay "Curious child, ever reviled." Idk it fits to me. "It feels like the time she fell through the ice then came out alive" Idk I know her arena isnt ice but like!! The idea of reliving the time you almost died and coming out alive again and again "But she's got the best stories, you can be sure that as she was leaving it felt like freedom. All of her fuckin' lives flashed before her eyes and she realized it feels like the time she fell through the ice then came out alive." Like to me it feels like her recognizing freedom after the games are over and in D2 and having her life be hers again and idk!! It made sense to me.

Cassandra: This ALSO is dropping lore but this song feels like the D2 split during the rebellion like each side thinking the opposite of her "in the street theres a ragin rio, when it's burn the bitch they're shrieking. When the truth comes out it's quiet so they killed cassandra first." "they knew they knew they knew the whole time that I was on to something" I feel like i need to drop more Enobaria during the war time lore for this to make sense but it does to me so just take my word for it!!

Okay!!! Thank you bestie!! Here's a small novel in resopnse to your otherwise simple question!! Love you!! @bodyelectric77

[bitch-spectrum]

PART 2/3

Part 1 ,, Part 3

Ed

Personality Headcanons: He hates tobacco. He hates it when people smoke around him. He's the kind of guy to put out your cigarette for you and you look up at him, thinking you're gonna fight some punk but quickly change your mind. His dad used to make him cut and light his cigars and he hated doing it so much he swore he'd never smoke. The hole that he sleeps in is deliberately cut, sanded, and reboarded. He nests in there. Probably Autistic and doesn't speak much around strangers. Will gladly infodump to his friends. He's in his mid-late 30s ~35-38. In addition to being part of TF4 he also works part time as a steam locomotive driver. After being tied to the train tracks, he kind of got curious about it. He can play an instrument, I'm just not sure which one. Probably a fiddle idk. Physical Headcanons: The tooth sticking out is a broken tusk. he desperately wants to grow facial hair, has tried, and cannot. He's very jealous of people who do have facial hair. ~6'05" Gender: Cis male Pronouns: He/Him Orientation: Straight He's a hardcore ally and loves going to pride events to support his friends. He thinks they're a lot of fun. Post Game: His life carried on fairly regularly afterwards, like Ace. I personally feel like he had more of a connection with Clover than the others though so, he was a little more impacted by their death. Sometimes he'll sit into the early morning with Starlo at the Saloon. Opinions: I'm bias. I heart large men so, points. I would have also liked to have seen more of him. One thing though is that on appearance alone I could so clearly hear his voice when he spoke. His design carries. 3.5/5.

Flowey

Personality Headcanons: Flowey is my favorite character in the Undertale franchise so I'm going to TRY to keep this short. As it stands, he's currently stuck at the maturity level he died at, so around 11-13. Since he doesn't have a physical body (other than a flower) he doesn't really age. I don't think he's a lost cause or even completely irredeemable. He's a terrified, traumatized, kid who's own parents don't recognize him anymore. He's had to try to navigate the world in a body that isn't his, completely alone. Sometimes when he goes through episodes he lies close to the ground to bite his petals and rip them off hoping that somehow it'll make room for his horns to grow back. He both despises his family for splitting up and ignoring him but wants nothing more than to be a family again. He has really conflicting feelings on a lot of things. I feel like if he went through extensive therapy his maturity would probably eventually catch up to what would be his chronological age if he wasn't a flower. He's touch starved but hates being touched. Probably has one or multiple personality disorders. Physical Headcanons: We get a side profile of his nose in his boss fight in neutral. I think that's a genetic trait from Asgore. Has freckles. Not much to headcanon since he's a Flower until the true ending of the OG UT when he ascends. Gender: He stopped giving fucks a long time ago. Pronouns: He/They (DESPISES being called an it) Orientation: Aroace. He's not necessarily repulsed but if asked if he has a crush on anyone he'd say "I'd rather watch someone be crushed to death than think ever think about dating." Post Game: N/A Opinions: I'm a die hard Flowey Apologist. He's such a deep, complex, and tragic character. I love him. I want to hug him. In this specific game too, wow, I love Flowey lore. Love Flowey angst. 5/5.

Martlet Personality Headcanons: Probably AuDHD. Definitely has racing thoughts / scatterbrain. Her first job was babysitting when she was a teen. She only barely got into The Royal Guard because they were desperate after losing a lot of good members in the war. She eventually proved herself to be a good member. Probably in her early 20s so ~21-23. Physical Headcanons: She's pretty buffed because of her job. ~5'10". I don't have too many. Gender: Trans Woman Pronouns: She/They Orientation: Multisexual of some sort with a preference for women. Also ambiamorous. Post Game: She quit her job at The Royal Guard, unable to really take the burden of having to kill a human child for the king. Chujin's words haunt her, what he said about her not being cut out for it. Instead she got a job as a classroom assistant. She bounces around the limited schooling system the underground has. So often times she gets a good reputation with the kids and will get to watch them grow up. Sometimes her job makes her think about how she could have done her best to hide Clover and watch them grow up too. She's a very emotional person by nature so, she would probably take the longest to really have it be in the past for her. But, she got right to *appearing* like she was moving on. By day it was like nothing had happened at all, she puts on a smile for the kids she helps out with, plays games with them. She's good at seeming okay but just shatters every night for a long time. Eventually (RAREPAIR), spending so much time with Dalv became beneficial for the both of them and they helped pull each other out of the rut. Opinions: I wish she had more screen time because she seems like a character the creators cared a lot about. She's very OC shaped and that's a good thing. I love when I can see the care that goes into a character. 4/5.

[kaeyankat]

Hello!

Could I request something for nnt?

I have 3 characters in mind: Gowther, Estarossa and Arthur, but if it is too much, feel free to choose of these three!

I was thinking of some fluff what would make them have a little short circuit moment because crush or s/o was so cute they just stop functioning for a bit?

I hope I made some sense! Thank you!

Omg- of course- to be honest I wasn't expecting a request so I didn't check- I hope you enjoyed, dear! Even though it's more of headcanons on how itd go ~KK

Estarossa

His crush would always be cute to him, there's a reason they're his crush after all

This is his nickname when caught potentially displaying feelings toward her.

But if she was being extra cute, then first he would blush staring at her

Something he would consider extra cute is wearing his jacket after hers were destroyed or she was cold

After just a few quick seconds, Estarossa's mind would start swirling with thoughts of his crush, just staring at them with a slight tingle of pink on his cheeks and love in his eyes

If someone were to try to get his attention, they wouldn't be able to for a good while

Everyone would joke that he had told a lie to Galand and was turned into a statue

His crush however would, with Esta suddenly squeaking, looking at her with an adorable flustered and confused face

"Wh-what you need, brat-?"

If his crush were to ask for something, he'd immediately get it

However if she were to ask "Are you okay, you're staring", he'd fall off his seat or lose his balance, coughing awkwardly

"I WAS NOT, BRAT"

Arthur Pendragon

This is the man who would immediately turn red, fainting as an auto-reflex to protect his brain from frying in the moments after witnessing her cuteness

Cute can be anything to this man from a simple smile to a small habit, like a finger flutter to someone leaving

If his crush were to panic seeing him faint and were toooo I don't knowwwww place his head in their lap as they wait for him to wake, he'd freeze all over after gaining his consciousness back.

"i- what- [Name] i- hfhdibbehdqibhccddeh"

Passing out again right after, he'd probably keep doing so often under his crush understands why exactly he's fainting immediately

However if he worries her so much she cries, he'll instantly sit up to, as a bright red faced king, comfort her

Gowther

He is by far the most confused and broken for a bit

He doesn't know why he feels his mind racing, stomach churning,heart skipping beats, and skin flushing as he looks at his crush reading, or being kind to himself or someone else

It simply doesn't make sense. His only movement will be following his crush as you go about your day. He doesn't respond to questions or comments he doesn't react if he trips- he will simply stare as his wheels in his mind turn.

No matter who gets his attention, he will ask "why do I feel so odd right now?"

If it's anyone other than you, he'll become grumpy, because they'll be teasing.

If it's you and you're confused about his meaning, he will sigh softly

"I feel like my mind is focused solely on you and your actions. It was... Cute." He'll blankly state, staring at you

"Gowther, you're so silly! I have no clue what you mean, but thank you!"

As you flounce off, Gowther frowns, eyes narrowing. "Humans are so dense."

Man I'm so giddy about this- definitely more headcanons but- idk- have a wonderful day/night dearies! ~KK

[forcebookish]

ok so just some thoughts i need to get off my chest...but does anyone else find the "mew is secretly an evil manipulator" theories kind of cartoonish? 😭 like i just bust out laughing whenever i picture it bc i can't take it seriously. and call me boring but i would much prefer mew to be the "constant" of the friend group (bc let's face it in a show like this you need one) and it's gonna be earth shatteringly heartbreaking when he falls in love with top, has sex with him, and then realizes he just experienced the ultimate betrayal. idk that to me is way more interesting than "haha i was playing you all along." not saying he's not a flawed character (and i hope we see more of his flaws as the series goes on) but i really don't think it's in the way people think. but with that being said i will still be hoping for him to m*rder boston 🙏 (anyway thank you for allowing me to vent in here. i really appreciate all your theories/takes on the series so far!)

(thank u and ur welcome!!🥰 I'M GONNA WRITE A LOT AGAIN)

oh it's totally cartoonish! every time i see it i'm like, "...you guys know that they're, like, good writers, right?"😅😂

the whole point of mew as a character is his not being the stereotypical, wilting flower virgin but someone who is sexy and knows his worth. (and i'm not going to rehash everything else that tells us mew is definitely a virgin.) i agree, that is so much more interesting and smarter than 'actually, everyone's lying except boston, the character we've established is a pathological liar' lmao. the fact that BOSTON "confirms" their suspicion makes it even funnier that they're sticking to their guns.

i mean,

"or maybe?" he's just making stuff up as he goes along. this isn't just an obvious lie, we see boston earlier tell ray to go after mew because they haven't been sleeping together, to make top jealous:

and if they insist it's just to "secure" or "play" top for whatever reason, then what the heckadoodle-do is this about?

side-note: notice how boston rarely speaks in absolutes when he's weaving his web? "maybe," "might," "probably," etc. he preys on everyone's preestablished doubts and insecurities, making his lies even more believable to them. little pokes and prods, like he's just helping them work through a problem - a problem he's creating. he can say, 'hey, i'm just saying it could be true.' fucking diabolical. he also has this smug, devious smile on his face - something that true deceivers who revel in the lie do. (and people have the audacity to say that top is smug? please.)

why would mew go out of his way to vet top after he was already his boyfriend? and then dump him? (which could have easily backfired. top could have said no; mew knew that.) why would he care if top is his "type" and checks off his checklist? he wants to make sure that top is boyfriend material before he sleeps with him so he doesn't get his heart broken, which is NORMAL. even if he weren't a virgin that's a perfectly normal way to navigate a relationship with someone you don't know very well yet, especially after what boston said. all the "implications" and "foreshadowing" that i've seen the fandom bring up are literally just him... flirting lol

re: mew's flaws, mew's definitely got more going on than we've seen, especially since we know how perceptive and intuitive he is (and that, by his admission, he gets snoopy and obsessive when he's really into someone). of the boys, i think mew's the character we know the least about because most of what we see of him, he's reacting to other characters and he doesn't always say a lot. besides the "interview" shots and maybe one or two other fleeting, superficial moments, i can only think of one scene where he's actually left alone with his thoughts:

and it's him feeling bad about making top sleep on the couch and deciding to get up to check on him/invite him to bed - not something a "manipulator" would do when no one is looking.

it is really ominous that production has hinted at nick and mew being "helpers." i could see mew going off the deep end and join in nick's, uh, colorful approach to relationships fjdlskjgjm but i just think he's going to snap or something, that won't have been his master plan all along lol (maybe they have to hide the body together) (haha jk... unless?)

yikes, i really did write a lot. thank you for enabling me, anon!💕