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#and ive been very overwhelmed with it all bc i know i agreed to it but it still feels almost like im being forced out since it was so sudden
kindlyfunkn · 10 months
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we apologized when i went to get my stuff and im likely gonna stay here tonight bc its snowing and my tires traction isnt good (i had the most terrifying brief driving experience of my life). my mom went to drop off half my stuff in her car and is bringing back essential morning stuff + my charger. i really hope school is cancelled tomorrow lol bc the snow is supposed to continue all night and the morning after and id have to go on the highway. plus if schools cancelled itd be great to actually have wifi to check my email in the morning (tomorrow afternoon is when we're getting it at the new apartment)
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lebbys-world · 5 months
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Secrets, Soba, & Smiles
Todoroki x gn!reader; teenagers in love, fluff, reader gets caught off guard a bit
notes: thanks for all the love on my last post :) im glad that so many people enjoyed my writing !! the kitchen scene is very artem from tot coded, which makes sense bc ive been obsessed with that game recently. anyways, hope you enjoy !! <3
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You peered down the hall, checking to make sure it was clear, before walking towards the elevator.
The soft hum of the door opening led you to walk inside, pressing the button for the fifth floor.
You looked down at your phone to check the time, quickly noticing you’d received a follow up text from your boyfriend.
Before leaving your dorm, you had sent him a message letting him know you were about to be on your way up. 
You smiled to yourself as the elevator made its way up the floors, shooting him back a quick reply.
More often than not, you found yourselves having these late-night dorm dates as a means to compensate for the lack of public relationship.
Throughout the school day, you two were just seen as close friends, allowing any suspicions to just be laughed off. After all, there was no sense in blatantly lying about your relationship to your friends.
But if you both feigned ignorance, it managed to keep their suspicions at bay. 
With all earnest, you weren't necessarily trying keeping your relationship with the icy-hot boy a secret from your peers.
You never had concern for them finding out - albeit the barrage of questions and attention may be a bit overwhelming.
If anything, the concern you had was for the general public finding out that two rising heroes had feelings for one another.
You feared the worst case scenario: a villain using your adoration for each other as a weapon.
Maybe you were overreacting, but the nightmare situation it was, you wanted to prevent it in any way you could. So, as a safeguard, the both of you had agreed to just keep things to yourself.
This agreement worked well anyways, as you and Todoroki settled into the awkward ins-and-outs of first time teenage love.
So, yes, for now, things were okay being a sort of ‘secret’.
It was a secret for you two to share.
You were his, and he was yours.
The elevator door opened once more as you reached the fifth floor, stepping out into a familiar, yet different, hallway.
You made your way to your boyfriend’s room, before giving a gentle knock on the door.
Soon enough, the doorknob turned, the door creaked open, and heterochronic eyes met your own. 
You laughed to yourself before commenting, “well, I made it here in one piece.”
He gave you a soft smile back, “yeah, you did.”
That was the smile that always managed to killed you.
A smile that you never saw him quite show to anyone but you.
The way his lips turned in adoration, a genuine love and joy meeting his face. His eyes would crease with that smile, and, every time, without fault, you’d melt at that smile.
It was a smile that felt like it was only for you.
Interrupting your star-struck daze, Todoroki tilted his head.
“I meant to tell you before you got here, but I still wanted to grab some snacks from the common room.”
You stood up straight, pulling yourself back together.
“Oh, I could’ve just picked them up on the way.”
“It’s not a problem; I’ll just go now. You can set your stuff down. I'll be back shortly."
He started walking past you to begin his quick mission, when you followed on his heels. 
“I’ll come with you! Two people are better than one!”
He paused, gave a nod of appreciation, and the two of you carried on towards the main floor.
The short trip there was spent debating what snacks would be best for this late night excursion, with you insisting that your favorite food was the only way to go.
By the time you'd made it to the kitchen, Todoroki had been pleading his case for soba - per usual.
“Look,” he said, now pointing to a something sat on the shelf of the pantry. “They still have some left over. We could probably make two servings.”
He met your eyes with diligence, looking like a young child begging for a toy at the store.
As much as your favorite snack was calling your name, you thought to yourself that maybe some cold soba would be nice as well. 
“Fine, but I’m making the sauce.” You sighed, accepting his pleas. I mean, how could you not when he had given you such a cute look?
He smiled, his invisible tail practically wagging as he pulled out a pot and began to fill it with water. 
Nearby, you opened up the fridge and pulled out a few ingredients to start making into a light sauce.
You swiftly put on an apron, and started mixing things together before feeling complete with your makeshift recipe.
You took a spoon and dipped it in, giving it a taste. Having it meet your own liking, you called your boyfriend over, making sure it would suit his taste as well.
Continuing to stir, you thought to yourself how something about this unplanned cooking trip had just felt so right
It was almost as if you two were a married couple, working on making dinner together after a long day of work.
The idea made you blush.
Deep inside, these calm nights were the kind you hoped the future would bring many more of.
You were about to turn around and call to him again when you were suddenly met with two arms wrapped around your waist.
You let out a small gasp of surprise as Todoroki took the spoon from your hand, following through on your request and trying the dipping sauce you had made.
He hummed a tone of satisfaction and let his head rest atop your shoulder. 
“It’s really good, Y/N. Thank you, for your help.”
At that moment, you thanked God that your boyfriend couldn't see your overwhelmingly red face.
You doubt you would’ve even been flustered if Todoroki wouldn’t have pulled that hugging-you-from-behind cliché.
I mean, heck, he probably didn't even realize he was doing something that even could catch you so off guard.
Your boyfriend probably just thought he was hugging you, sharing his adoration for your cooking and determination.
And here you were, heart going overdrive all over his simple motions.
Having felt your heart rate spike, he let go after a moment, returning back to the care of draining the pot of soba. 
You took a moment and collected yourself a bit, finally giving a delayed reply:
“Yeah, anytime, Sho. It’s what I’m here for.”
He looked at you again, turning his gaze away from the sink, and gave you that melting smile of his.
That smile that makes you feel like everything in the world is okay, even if just in this moment.
Somehow that smile managed to calm your panicked heart, reminding you to take this all one step at a time.
You returned his smile with your own. A smile of your own that you hoped he admired just as much as you did his.
“…”
“...SHOTO, THE SOBA-”
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milchig-de · 2 years
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I want to study you.
Pairing: Scaramouche x Reader (platonic/romantic)
Warnings: Curse words
Summary: You study Scaramouche (he does not take it particularly well).
Notes: I wrote this bc of the new archon quest and scaramouche's drip marketing, but it contains NO SPOILERS for the actual 3.2 update. the only 'spoilers' are for the drip marketing but even then im not sure you can call it that considering its like. one picture thats probably everywhere already. but you have been warned regardless (also sry for bad pic and fic quality. ive gotten out of practice with writing and i didnt want to show the whole picture but it worsens the quality when i cut it) reblogs are greatly appreciated!!!
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"What are you doing here all by yourself?"
Scaramouche turned around to find someone standing behind him. He didn't know this person and they weren't wearing clothing that could point them to a specific nation or organization.
"What do you want?",
He answered with the most malice he could muster. The stranger smiled at him politely.
"I'm just looking out for a fellow traveller. This area is ridden with monsters. You should be careful."
He crossed his arms over his chest.
"Tch. I can handle myself."
Cocking their head, they let their eyes wander over his form. Scaramouche squirmed under their gaze. It felt odd, but nice. Like he was being studied very carefully. It was nothing like the way others had looked at him, apprehensive and cautious. It stirred something in him, like a memory he suppressed.
But when he stared back into their eyes and they met his gaze, suddenly the sensation of being studied became overwhelming, their eyes boring into his own, his skull, his brain, looking much further and deeper than his bones and flesh, opening him as easily as a book, reading his every thought and feeling, he didn't know how much longer he could stand it, roughly being picked up and placed under a microscope, having his very being so exposed- and then they redirected their gaze somewhere else, Scaramouche too busy with this feeling to care.
After a slight pause, which he used to recover, they turned back to him. The same polite smile as before graced their face and it made his heart skip an unsure beat, wondering whether they had really managed to read him completely.
"Would you mind if I stayed here?"
Scaramouche had to swallow hard before he could speak, his throat having dried up completely and still being thrown off a little.
"No. Like I said I can handle myself."
They raised their eyebrows a tad. Did they notice he didn't put as much malice in as before? Or perhaps... Did they think he could not handle himself? Did he look that incompetent? The very thought made him furious. If they really had managed to somehow read his thoughts, they would've known that he may have had his faults, but he was not stupid.
"I'm not asking because of you. I'm asking because of me. It's always safer with someone by your side. Don't you agree?"
He let out a snort.
"Of course it's safe. Until they turn their back on you."
The stranger cocked their head to the side and mustered him again. This time, Scaramouche was wise enough to not look into their eyes so they wouldn't gaze into his like that again. Who knows what they would manage with another chance at reading him.
"Well I'm going to stay here. If you're not comfortable with that, I don't mind going a distance away."
"Tch. Do whatever you want."
He turned his body away from them. A few footsteps were heard before the rustling of equipment sounded. Keeping his eyes firmly stuck on his make-shift tent, which consisted of a blanket pulled on a few smartly arranged sticks, he pondered who they were. If they were any sort of famous person, he was sure he would've found out about them on his travels. Furthermore, if they were just an average traveller, how did they do it?
The rustling behind him had stopped, indicating they had finished setting up. They walked around again.
"Would you mind if I used your fireplace? You can have some food as well, if you want."
"Like I said, do whatever you want."
Taking this as a yes, they started working, presumably preparing food.
Leaning back a bit, Scaramouche looked up to the stars. His hands fiddled with his clothes. He was so confused. Why did he have such an intense feeling before? Were they a magician? Or perhaps an insane scientist such as Il Dottore with some crazy device? There was no way they were just some ordinary human. Maybe he shouldn't have let them stay with him. What if the best course of action was to leave while he still had the chance? There's no telling what they would do while he rested. Desperately searching, he looked to the stars for answers, yet they provided none, as always.
He had been eager to get into astronomy, yet it wasn't as easy as it seemed. Regardless, he would not give up so fast. Maybe if he tried just a little harder, he would finally see what fate had prepared for him. Then he could never be betrayed or used again. He could protect himself from a feeling such as the one he had had before. He would finally be someone with an inkling of power. Maybe some day he could show it to... He shook his head. What nonsensical thoughts. Whatever the reason for this thinking, it didn't matter. He would push on and pursure his goals, he was sure of it.
An exclamation from behind him snapped him out of his thoughts. Turning back to them, he noticed a delicious aroma of soup floating around. It made his stomach growl. Upon hearing it, the stranger gave him a soft smile and offered him a bowl of soup. His stomach growled. Disgruntled that he was hungry enough to accept the stranger's hospitableness, he snatched the bowl, without spilling any soup of course. But he was still distrustful, so he took the time to carefully sniff the soup and test it for any poison. Who knows what they'd do if he gave them the chance. They merely watched with an amused expression while eating their own bowl of soup, as if they knew what was going through his head, which made him even angrier.
After determining that they werent trying to poison him, he relaxed a bit and ate a spoon of soup. It was quite delicious, filling his stomach with warmth and a distinct sense of home. ... Home? He was having the oddest thoughts today. It's a soup, how could it possibly feel like home? Yet he couldn't help but eat more of it, craving the feeling it gave him.
His opposite had already finished their bowl, and now observed him while he was eating. They put their head on their hand. Their gaze bore into him. He didnt like the way they looked at him. It almost felt like they knew something he didn't and were pitying him. He had no need for pity of any sort and especially not from them. They were still a danger to behold, as he still knew nothing about them, yet they seemed to know everything about him.
Suddenly, they spoke to him again.
"How have you survived this long by yourself?"
Scaramouche almost choked on his soup.
They couldn't know... No, there was simply no way. Even if he felt otherwise, there was no logical way for them to have read so deeply into his past. They must instead be talking about his lack of a companion, which made him angry once again. After properly finishing his bite, he snapped at them that he wasn't incompetent.
"Ah, it seems you misunderstood me. I'm not doubting your abilities to survive on a physical level. You're lonely. So much so that even the small kindness of offering you food has made you desperate for more. If the way you've been devouring my soup is anything to go by."
His cheeks warmed and he stumbled over his words, trying to come up with a good comeback. Of course they were wrong, he would never crave anything like human closeness. At the end of the day he wasn't even human. So they had no reason to assume anything like that.
A soft laugh escaped them and he could only marvel at it. It sounded so beautiful........ly stupid. Yes very stupid because they were laughing at him. It's not like they had any right to laugh, they didn't have any companion either. And he told them as such. Stopping their incessant laughter, they nodded.
"It's true I'm on my own myself, but I'm not as lonely as you. I sense that you've been betrayed in your past, which has caused you severe issues, am I right?"
His jaw fell open. What the fuck. He had been hesitant to believe that his feeling from before was correct, yet here they were, talking as if they truly knew him. It seemed they were even more powerful than he had suspected. Even more reason to worry, as now he had to do his best to protect not only his physical form and goods from strangers but also his emotions. Considering this was his first time having his emotions, past and thoughts read, he had a lot ahead of him to work through. It was of the utmost importance that such a thing never happen again, after all he couldn't just spill his secrets to any person he came across who could cross into his mental state and-
"It's okay."
Scaramouche looked up at them. Nothing was okay. This total stranger had just turned out to be a mind-reading freak and he had no way to protect himself from them.
"It was just a guess. And judging from your shocked expression, I was indeed correct. You're quite obvious about it, you know. Although I can't exactly say you're wrong, there are plenty of people out there who would stab you in your back as you sleep. Speaking from experience, by the way."
Oh. So they were just good at reading people. He had worried all about nothing. A certain sense of relief flooded him, yet there was also an anger present. Mostly directed at himself for feeling so exposed by their gaze and thus accidentally exposing himself.
"Hm, if you're worried about being betrayed, why don't we become companions? We could protect each other."
What a stupid idea. They weren't excluded from betraying him, so why would they suggest something like that. Truly one of the dumbest things they had said tonight.
They readjusted their position to be kneeling. Looking up at him, they put their hand on their chest, as if they were making an oath.
"I will stay by your side, I promise."
Scaramouche was confident they were lying but.... They looked at him with such an honesty in their eyes, it felt like they were trying to trying to lay themselves open in the same way he had exposed himself by accident. Perhaps he could learn how to grasp a person just by being around them for a bit by this stranger.
Fully aware of the risk he was taking, he decided to agree.
After all, he wanted to start a new life. He even rid himself of anything that reminded him of his old life, such as the stupid colours he had worn before. There was no way for him to start fresh if he decided to be stuck in his old mindset of violently pushing the people away that came to close to him.
So, after some pondering, he looked them straight in the eyes.
"Okay. But don't you dare break your promise."
They gave him a toothy grin. It was cute.
"I won't. I know it."
The smallest of smiles pulled at Scaramouche's mouth, which he hid by returning to his unfinished soup. While he did as such, the stranger started telling him a story from their last travel. For once, he had gained a semblance of peace and happiness, content in listening to their ramblings.
And so, they would continue their following travels together, wandering the nations of Teyvat, content in being just that: Wanderers.
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ge · 11 months
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sumt about chung myung having a (relatively) softer heart than tang bo makes me melt... u can see tang bo doesn't reach out to things that he feels doesn't need it, but chung myung actively takes things into his heart... man i love how they're so diff from how they're presented as. usually the smiley, touchy one would be the self sacrificial one
(idk where this is from but is tang bo actually cold to others when not in front of chung myung...? this is such a popular thing i see in works lol)
yall genuinely have no idea how often im thinking about tangchung character studies theyre so interesting to pick and prod at.. chung myung keeping his softness under so many many layers of rock hard defense and even when u get close enough to him to break those walls down, hes so unused to being unprotected that gentleness feels like something that has to be coerced, gripped, and dragged out of him, affection making his chest feel clogged and cumbersome, and love felt so heavily it feels like it could bring down the sky.. he feels with such an overwhelming excessiveness that displaying it freely in any way other than casual familiarity feels like humiliation, and asking for it in return even more shameful.. he is a empty house hungry to be lived in and yearning for a flame but he would much rather let his terse and concise and seemingly brutish actions speak louder than his softness, no matter how it may end up being interpreted....my long winded way of saying i think chung myung has an extreme hedgehog dilemma and is a tsundere about it
tang bo is a little trickier for me to get a read on maybe bc i hvnt read much about him yet and most of my knowledge of him comes from fics & twt users LOL (which im aware are mostly extremely ooc..it kinda grates on me knowing most or all of my knowledge of him is secondhand and distorted) but i must agree with you.. the tang bo in my head is predominately headcanon ive built up myself so whatever i say about him might be extremely off the mark but idgaf..i like the version of him i have in my head currently..
compared to chung myung, tang bo feels hrmmm..more sociable but impersonal.. im not sure if he can be called cold exactly, but he doesnt seem to show much care or affection to anyone he isnt particularly close with.. he seems to have an almost impassive business type relationship with most people, including his family though it should be mentioned aside from chung myung, he is also friendly towards chung mun and chung jin, having been said to drink w the three of them often.. from what ive seen he seems to treat them like a second family in a sort of way? i attribute tang bos dispassionate demeanor to his family, the way he was raised formed a sort of crust around not, not so much a wall but a poker face..and chung myung was the first person who directly challenged the monotony of his life
smth about the dichotomy of their natures is sooo interesting urhg.. tang bo, a young master of a reputable rich family given everything he could ever want for, taught to be upright and gallant since birth, wearing the seemingly permanent mask of impersonality and tranquility that was hammered into him since young, meeting someone who brought back colour into his dull world for the first time in his life and suddenly that mask starts crumbling and tang bo finds himself happy in a way he was never allowed to be under the watchful eye of his familys strict elders
compared to chung myung whos life was nearly the complete opposite, an orphan taken in and raised in a sect by people who showered him w as much uninhibited familial love as he could want for, taught him to be honourable and respectable, grows up w a penchant for keeping his true emotions hidden deep underneath his surface, not out of malice or obligation but because, unlike tang bo, it was simply how he was..meeting and befriending tang bo made him begin to WANT, for the very first time..to actually show someone how deeply he can care, to peel back the veil and show someone the desperation for intimacy he desires so profoundly that buzzes underneath his skin in a way he couldnt, wouldnt, speak of out of the sheer indignity of it all...yeah so basically what im saying again is that hes tsundere and tang bo saw that and was like i need that gay boy
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thatbitchsimone · 9 months
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re gypsy rose: being center of attention is all she knows. i can't blame her for being attention seeking, because that's her whole damn life. she has always gotten attention from doctors, from people, from news, ever since she was a child. first she was the sick child and now she is the woman who was forced to fake being sick child who killed her mother, she lost the opportunity to normal life and normal behavior long, long ago. i can't blame her for going to the news or talking about herself, how can she know anything else?
thats also a really good point and theres probably at least some truth to that but idk if i agree that shes attention seeking in that way. like i dont personally think she craves fame or whatever i just think shes like… a normal girl i guess. like yeah she got onto social media right away, but tbh she would most likely do that even if she was completely unknown bc most women her age use social media and ofc she would want to participate and post cute instagram photos with her husband and pretty selfies etc bc why not? its what everyone does and shes finally free to take part in normal life.
and the reason shes even doing these press tours is to promote her docuseries which is where she for once gets to speak out fully and tell her story in her own words and be truly heard. she knows her story has been told by others, she knows about The act and the documentaries and how viral her story went while she was away, and now she wants to take her story back and tell it herself which is only fair and id probably do the same if i was her
and yeah she wants to meet taylor swift. well duh what taylor swift fan would not want to meet taylor swift? shes just sharing her dreams. shes always been a dreamer like that, and honestly if she gets the chance to actually meet her fave singer ofc she will take it. anyone would lol.
but anyway, she is used to having the spotlight on her just like u said but i guess rn thats almost a blessing in disguise in a way since that means she kinda knows how to handle it better than most. like id be overwhelmed as fuck in her situation but thats bc ive always been a private normal person who has never been in the public eye but shes sorta.. accustomed to it which is sad bc as we all know she never should have been bc she should never have been in that horrible situation in the first place but at least now that can be an advantage for her during the media hype. shes being smart with it and she wants to use it to help others and be an advocate which i think she will have lots of success in and do lots of good in the future.
i guess what im trying to say is that in my opinion shes not seeking the attention, the attention is already on her and shes just embracing it and making the best of it in order to do something good and to finally have her voice heard for the first time in her life. when u have gone through abuse and have had to keep quiet about it and keep it inside ur whole life ur gonna have that urge to scream it out and let the whole world know whats been done to u and its healing and freeing and empowering to do so when ur finally safe and ready to. she needs to be heard and seen for once and she deserves it bc everyone deserves that. its very human
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87435678753256732 · 2 years
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January 2023
new year new me!! at least that’s what i’m telling myself. i’m writhing on here mostly for my own mental sanity, and because now i don’t have anyone else to talk about it really
i got broken up with. i’m trying to process all my thoughts, gather my emotions, and basically express how i feel. i’m definitely having two reactions, but obv the sad one is overwhelming the other part of me (the sagittarius part i call it) that is a bit relieved. okay. so about two weeks ago i started noticing that he/things were a bit off. i said “okay probably just my mood due to not being on meds anymore.” i didn’t say anything because i wanted to avoid facing reality; things were stale. our last two dates were fine, at least i thought. today two things happened that felt off. one was that he started eating his food before i got mine, and the other was that he didn’t want to go watch puss in boots with me. fine, okay whatever, take me home bc because i have work tomorrow. i wasn’t upset, i understood that we both have work in the morning. we takes me home, parks, and says “i have something to tell you” AWW HELL NAW. thought in my head; this could be 1. scary, telling me he wants to take things the next step or 2. end things. WELPPP it was 2. he stated that he needed a break, reason being he needs to work on himself. i say okay,, and start asking him questions bc i cannot be left contemplating what could’ve ACTUALLY be the reason. states that he has “outgrown” our relationship. BRO we’re both 23 and goofy asf, wym outgrown gtfo. okay, next. states i don’t fit the “ideal partner” he has for himself. says my style, personality, and hair doesn’t correlate with what he’d want in someone. LMFAO. i’ve known my style is funny, i call it emo grandma core- which i’ve made very aware to him in the past that that’s just who i am. okay, whatever. basically grass is greener reasoning. what else is out there? welp, how he can go find out. it sucks being broken up with for the third time. i give shitty men so many excuses and end up being the one hurt. we both agreed that we were glad that this happened now instead of way into the relationship. i know some of the reasons were because of external factors of myself (ex: fashion), but i genuinely believe that this is just a reflection of him. when will you find someone that checks all the boxes? hardly ever. compromise is big, especially when you claim to “love someone.” i basically embarrassed him. this has made me realize that 1. i need to seek someone who loves me regardless of how i look and 2. understands that the “perfect” match isn’t realistic, love is something you work for. i understand that this was his first relationship, and i’m happy to have been his first, and thankful for the fun dates and cool experiences. now it’s time to heal and move on. I did want to talk about the side of me that i like to refer as my sag side, the side that fears commitment and wants to run away. this side is relieved that this is over. mostly because i didn’t really feel that i loved him as much as i tried convincing myself. i enjoyed the sex, that was fun, but i didn’t really feel the love i felt for my previous partners. at moments i questioned whether i even liked men, yet ive never had feelings for women either, so comphet can’t be the answer. now that i’m not in a relationship, my sag side wants to hoe out but i need to be safe about my hoeventures.
i know i need to heal first. these next couple of days will suck. i told him i wouldn’t block him, bc i’m not a petty person and still care about him. we hugged, kissed, he went in for longer which i backed out of. i feel used. used for sex. the way he groped me throughout our date, for him to later tell me he no longer had feelings. i think his excuse was stupid, but i understand that he still needs to grow. i have therapy on thursday, so hopefully i’ll be able to process some of this. i’ve grieved a lot this past year, and it hurts so much to add on to the table. but i’ll be okay, i always have been.
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spirituallyastro · 3 years
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okay so this is my first random astrology observations/notes post so bear with me😂 (I hope you guys enjoy pls give me feed back idc if it’s negative I want to get better to help you guys)
• whatever house your sun is in you’re likely to have lot of friends and partners from that element, ex. my sun is in the 11th house (11th house is ruled by Aquarius). I’ve been close with air signs (Libra, Gemini, Aqua) my whole life. i’ve always had Aquarius close to me no matter what. -ALSO i’ve noticed that whatever sister sign of the house your sun is in you’ll have a friend of that sign also. so that would be leo for me since my sun is in the 11th house (Aquarius)
• If you have Gemini or Virgo (mercury ruled signs) in your big 3 or personal planets (sun,moon,rising) you will constantly overthink things. WAY more than the average person…oh yeah and obviously if you have those in your mercury
• mars in aries or mars in the first house should do physical activities to get their emotions out in a healthy way! (you guys can be a little rough too😂 ik this bc I have mars in 1st also)
• mars in libra people are often very rarely assertive and extremely passive with anything, since mars is ruled by Aries and that’s their opposite sign!!! Mars will pick a fight over anything, but Libra will always find a way to passively fight behind closed doors
• virgo moons may suffer from bad anxiety or worrying, due to them overwhelming themselves with details & judgments. they want everything to be perfect & controlled at all times. the anxious energy of always needing to fix everything can be a lot for them causing anxiety….also a mercury ruled sign being in the moon position will bring this person to be very calculative & judgmental of their own feelings. they seek the reasoning behind feelings instead of accepting them as natural responses.
• Aries placements remember things very well it’s actually scary😭 whenever I need to remember anything from high school or middle school I call my Aries friend because I know she��ll remember it all perfectly.
• if you have an Aries moon you may be known for having a short temper
• Ive noticed that air moons (gemini,libra,aquarius) (mostly gemini) have a hard time processing their emotions. you guys don’t really know how to feel you more so just think of your emotions as thoughts instead of just feeling them. which isn’t a bad thing!! at all.
• capricorns & cancers can eat the same thing straight for weeks. they don’t like trying new things.
• if you have scorpio placements you may have a subconscious compelling aura to you that makes others vent to you randomly
ahhh that’s all I can think of rn and it’s 1:12 so i’m gonna stop here, again hopefully you guys like if and lmk if you agree! 🤍🤍
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hopelesshunny · 3 years
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the love languages part iii: words of affirmation (f.w.)
pairing: fred weasley x fem!reader
summary: y/n thinks fred is losing interest in her after he catches another girls eye so he makes sure she knows just how much he loves her.
warnings: kissing, mentions of cheating, misunderstandings, mentions of a breakup, insecurities, mentions of marriage, mentions of pregnancy, very brief joke about a physical fight, ANGST but with a happy ending!!
word count: 1.7k
a/n: this is late and i'm very, very sorry but i started writing it and kinda hated it so i had to take a step back and come back to it! i kinda struggled with this one bc words of affirmation is the farthest thing from my personal love language but i hope i did it justice.
*all photos are from pinterest*
series masterlist // part i // part ii // part iv
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The warm sunlight washed over Y/N’s skin as she stepped into the courtyard, a smile etched on her face at the thought of seeing her boyfriend, after spending the entire day in class away from him she couldn’t wait to revel in the feeling of his arms wrapped around her. She scanned the sea of students before her eyes finally found him, her smile slightly dropped when she saw two Hufflepuff girls standing in front of Fred as he leaned against a bench on the ground. The two girls were older than Y/N, they giggled as they spoke to him, one of them twirling her hair around her finger. She could feel jealousy pooling deep in the pit of her stomach coupled with an overwhelming sense of guilt as Fred looked very uninterested with the conversation the two girls were attempting to initiate, constantly looking around in search of her.
“There she is!” Fred spoke when Y/N made her way to him, the smile on his face was so genuine that she almost forgot about all the anger that previously possessed her.
“Hi, Freddie.” She greeted, giving into his outstretched arms to let him pull her into his lap. He placed a sweet kiss to her temple. “Hi.” She spoke softly, turning her attention to the two girls, irritation lacing their features.
“Maybe we’ll see you around Fred.” One of them piped up before leaving, whispering to one another as they retreated.
“Your friends seem nice.” Y/N scoffed, biting the inside of her cheek as Fred’s arms tightened around her, sensing her discomfort.
“Not my friends.” He chuckled, littering the side of her face with kisses which earned a giggle from her. “Just some girls in my Herbology class, they won’t leave me alone.” He added.
“Can’t entirely blame them.” She joked, attempting to make light of the situation. “I don’t leave you alone either.”
“Mhmm.” He started, turning her head to face him so that he could place a kiss to her lips. “But your company is more than welcomed, princess.”
She giggled at his soft demeanor, taking his hand in hers whilst she leaned back against his chest as she listened to him babble on excitingly about some of the new products he and George were working on for the shop. She felt content here in his arms but her mind kept wandering to the girls that were obviously attempting to flirt with her boyfriend.
Y/N knew Fred loved her, knew that no matter how many girls flocked to him he would always politely excuse himself from the situation in order to find her, knew that he wouldn’t even think about cheating on her but was he losing interest in her? What if he was looking at all these other girls and thinking they were prettier than her, smarter than her, better than her? She pushed the thoughts away, not wanting to think about losing Fred to someone else, she could hardly stomach it. But truly, it plagued her, Fred had come into her life and made it completely different, he forced her to live in colour after so long of feeling like she was one of those sad black and white Hollywood starlets. He made her feel special, made the rain seem like a gift instead of an inconvenience, made the sun feel warmer and the moon feel like he hung it in the sky just for her.
Fred noticed that Y/N had something on her mind and spent the next few days constantly asking if she was okay but he knew that she was far too stubborn to tell him what was bothering her. Because of this Fred tried a little harder to make sure she knew how much she meant to him, Y/N knew what he was doing but she wasn’t ready to confess to him that she was jealous of all the attention he was getting from the girls at school, worried that her insecurities would push him away. But that was never something that crossed Fred’s mind, he had assumed that other people flirting with him would upset her which is why he always rejected the advances, always made sure she knew that there was no one else walking this earth more perfect for him, he truly wanted nothing more than to slip a ring on her finger and spend the rest of his days with her. Hell if he had a ring right now he’d propose to her no questions asked.
“Alicia, do you know who that girl is?” Y/N asked as she sat in the library, textbooks littering the table in front of the two girls as they poured over their homework. Alicia spun around in her seat to get a look at the girl in question.
“The Hufflepuff girl?” She asked to which Y/N nodded. “I think her name is Jessica, why?”
“It’s nothing.” She lied in reply, gritting her teeth. “Just asking.”
“No you’re not.” She spoke casually, seeing directly through Y/N’s facade. “You don’t seem like yourself lately, what’s wrong?”
“She was talking to Fred a couple days ago.” Y/N sighed. “I just can’t shake it, I’ve caught her staring at him at dinner a few times and she was so adamant about talking to him that day.” Her voice shook as she spoke, Alicia looked to her with a soft smile.
“Y/N.” She started. “Fred loves you so bloody much, so much so that it's kind of gross sometimes. He’d never even think about pursuing another girl, he looks at you like you have a halo hanging above your head.”
“Thanks.” She sniffed, giggling at her friend. “You’re a good friend, Alicia.”
“And if all else fails, you could probably take her in a fight.” Alicia added, earning a loud, genuine laugh from Y/N earning stares and shushing from those in the library.
She felt lighter after her conversation with Alicia and was excited to see Fred at dinner, she wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around his neck and kiss his entire face. Her warm and fuzzy thoughts of Fred were interrupted when she saw Jessica running her fingers up his arm, a devilish smile playing on her lips. Y/N could hardly process the sight in front of her, it was making her sick to her stomach so much that she couldn’t bear to look at Fred’s face not wanting to see his reaction to the pretty girl in front of him trailing her hand up his arm. She didn’t even realize that her feet were carrying her body away from the sight in front of her until she could hear him calling after her.
Tears spilled from her eyes, tracking down her face as she ignored Fred’s desperate calls to her, practically running through the common room and up to her room. She slammed the door, sliding down it as she pulled her knees up to her chest, sobs now freely leaving her mouth.
“Y/N, angel-” Fred started, outside her door, he was audibly out of breath from chasing her through the castle. “Open the door please.”
She sat there for a minute, contemplating never opening the door, never speaking to him again, just simply forgetting that she never ever heard Fred Weasley’s name. But she knew she couldn’t, knew she could never forget about him and she also knew she shouldn’t just shut him out, he would never purposely hurt her. With a sigh she lifted herself from the ground and opened the door to find her very disheveled boyfriend, his hair messy from running his hands through it, his face flushed. As soon as she saw him her legs collapsed beneath her, choked sobs making their appearance once again.
“Hey, hey, none of that.” He whispered, taking her into his arms on the floor. “She just came up to me love, I told her she had to leave me alone, that there was never going to be anything between us because I was in love with you.” He rubbed circles into her back as she sobbed into his chest, placing barely there kisses into her hair.
“Are you-” She started, another brutal sob racking her body. “Are you losing interest in me? I-I don’t want you to feel like you have to stay with me if you don’t want to be.” Freds heart was aching listening to her, he cursed himself for the way she was feeling. He should have told her he loved her more, he should have woken her up every morning by telling her she was the only girl he ever thought of, that he ever wanted.
“I love you Y/N.” He began. “H-How-”
“You can love someone and get bored with them.” She spoke quietly. Fred sighed, placing his hands on her shoulders, he pulled her back to look at her.
“I will never get tired of you, you will never bore me and there is not a chance in hell that I will lose interest in you.” Her eyes found his for the first time since she first opened the door. “I think about you all day, everyday, from the second I wake up with you in my arms until I get to fall asleep next to you, all I think about is you. You’re everything to me.” He let a deep sigh leave his chest as he took her face in his hands. “I’m going to marry you Y/N, in the backyard, back home with everyone there and then we’re gonna have a bunch of little red-headed babies, send them off to Hogwarts and argue over what house they’ll be sorted in.” He said, pulling a giggle from her which he reciprocated with a relieved smile.
“You want to marry me?” She asked as he wiped a stray tear from her eye with the pad of his thumb.
“I have since the day you agreed to date a bloody git like me.” He joked, pulling her into his chest. “It’s only you Y/N, it’s always been you, it’ll always be you, you’re it for me.” She buried her face into his jumper, forgetting about Jessica, forgetting about her doubts, just breathing in his scent, just feeling his lips on her hairline, just her and her Freddie.
taglist (join here!!)
@onlyfreds @fandomhideout @lilypad-55449 @youngblood199456 @thanxxskz @emma67 @gaycatlord-stuff @alicetweven @a-castle-of-glass @youcantbesirius @omghufflepuff @izzyyy-1​
if your url is crossed out i could not tag you!!
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jangofctts · 4 years
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omg I just read so much of your writing and I’m 🥺🥰🥲🥵 the absolute royalty shit that we see here today. i’ve recently discovered I am very into ~thigh riding~ so do u have any thots on how our boys (especially our clone babes) feel about it? much obliged
IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS ALL DAY KEJHKJRH SO HERE YOU GO OMG
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boba: yEs--boba absolutely adORES when you crawl into his lap and straddle his thigh. he’ll either pat his lap and invite you up or it’s one of those times when he’s intentionally ignoring you and you have force your way onto his lap so he has to pay attention. imo the first time you ride his thigh you weren't intending to, you wanted to fuck him but with boba, if you want something from him he’s gonna do it his way or twist it into something to tease you. so he’ll say something like “if you’re so desperate, ride my thigh” or maybe “ride my thigh and then we’ll see if you deserve my cock.” he’ll sit back and enjoy the show with a smug grin, one hand gripping your hip. he’s not controlling your pace, it’s mostly just there as an anchor bc you’re gonna be doing all the work. you’re lucky if you get to ride his bare thigh, but most of the time he’s got pants on so they always end up soaked after you cum and boba always teases you for it, “ruined another pair of pants, little one” but really he isn't even one to talk, he’ll be rock hard and leaking through his pants too. he’ll also nine times out of ten put his fingers or thumb into your mouth to suck on while he flexes and pushes the hard muscle of his thigh up to your cunt. he likes that satisfaction of knowing that even his thigh can make you shudder and whine his name--a bit of a power trip esp if he’s sitting on the throne. he’ll fuck you nice and hard afterwards if you’re a good little princess for him          
din: din wants you to ride the beskar thigh plating. he doesn't realize it’s a thing he finds arousing until you sit over his thigh and he sees the heat from your thighs fog up the metal while your arousal smears over the shiny beskar. literally it’s like something just CRACKS in him and he goes feral for it. a dark thrill that comes from seeing your cunt drip over his precious armor, something so sacrilegious that shouldn't be arousing but it’s the hottest thing he’s ever seen. sure, it’s a bit cold at first but the more you get into it the quicker it heats up--it’s slippery too, not a lot of friction unless you drag your clit over the seams of the armor, but with din’s hands holding onto your hips and dragging you over his thigh, it’s not long before you cum. din is gonna be encouraging you the whole time, just a constant flow of praise and little moans of his own. he might bury a hand in your hair or slip off his glove and touch your clit when your hips roll up into his hand. he’d loose his mind if you lended a hand and palmed him through his pants. he doesn't even care if he ruins his trousers, he’s just so...fixated on the hypnotic motions of your hips rolling over his thigh, your wetness dripping off the plating and onto the floor. he might focus on your mouth, parted with gasping moans or how they roll the syllable of his name. he likes to watch you come undone like this, shuddering and whiney as you cum and eventually roll off his thigh. he probably busts a nut right then and there if you start to roll your tongue over the beskar, happily cleaning up the mess you made. but....sometimes...lick it off himself just to get a taste of you       
paz: big boy blue ALSO likes when you ride his beskar, but he likes it better when the armor is off and he gets to feel your wetness for himself. he has big ol’ beefy thighs and likes when you straddle one and start to ride him like that. imo he likes it when youre pressed up right near his cock so when you roll forward your own thigh brushes against his cock. it’s also just easier for him to grab your hips, set a pace and watch you squirm and whine. ngl he’s more interested in fucking you, so he’ll get cheeky and start jerking his thigh or holding you in place while he circles his thumb over your clit. p much will sabotage your wild ride and convince you to slide onto his cock instead. though,....if you were to tie him up, tease him bye riding his thigh, he might like that :)  
rex: oH rexY BOY--listen, rex has heard ALL about thigh riding, or rather what the clones like to call it, “paint job”. he doesn't understand the big deal, thinks that it’d be a complete hassle to clean and what not. in my oPiNiOn he’ll be sitting with you in an empty break room or on a couch, you both have feelings for each other but nothing's been said yet. somehow the topic of paint jobs come up and he tells you what he thinks and how it “couldn't possibly feel good, blah blah blah”. you just roll your eyes and you ask if he’s even tried it. he definitely blushes and mumbles out a no and with a leap of faith you ask him if he wants you to ride his thigh. baby boy rex gets very shy and embarrassed about it but he’s not gonna say no. so you’ll flash him a little grin and peel off your pants and your over shirt, make rex relax against the back of the couch/chair and sit over his plastoid covered thigh. even though when you start to grind on his thigh you still have your underwear on, rex with pick a corner of the room to just stare at. it’s not because he doesn't like you, he’s just incredibly shy and afraid he’ll cum in his pants if he looks at you. you gotta cup his jaw and force him to look at you. when that happens his eye will immediately drop to between your legs and just moan at the sight. he gets it now. seeing your arousal that’s already leaking through the thin fabric and staining the blue and white plastoid--he has to grip the fucking sidearm to anchor himself. his armor is one of the only things that he owns and is proud of, so seeing you riding his thigh, moaning and whimpering his name he goes wild for that shit. unfortunately he does end up cumming in his pants but eh fuck it. it was worth it   
cody: he likes when you ride his thigh in semi public places like the 79′s, debrief room, gunships, you name it. imma explain the 79′s scenario bc im a whore but anyway, cody likes to bring you on dates there, one because the drinks are free for him, two it’s dark and so unless someone is really looking at the two of you, it’s pretty secluded. he always chooses a back corner table and after a couple drinks you start to get handsy--nuzzling his neck and wiggling your fingers between the gaps separating his thigh and codpiece. it alWAYS starts like that. cody will chuckle, push his nose into your neck and nibble a line up to your ear, then bite down onto the cartilage. in that dark, rumbly voice he might sigh “such a depraved little creature. we’re in public”. but you can feel his smile and how is pulse quickens under your fingertips. cody will sigh and shake his head as he pulls you onto his lap, bUT--he’s gonna have you with your back to his chest plate, your dress/skirt/pants rolled up or down just barely in the view of anyone who glances over or looks a little closer. it’d be no secret what you both were up to but cody likes that. dude doesn't have any shame and so he’ll wrap an arm over your hip, push you panties to the side and slide his fingers through your folds. once they're coated in your arousal he might pop them into his mouth or yours, clean them off then flex his thigh onto your pussy. when he asks you to grind on his thigh you readily agree. while you ride his thigh he’ll nibble at your throat and suck bruises onto your skin, either watching your wet pussy slide over the plastoid armor or on the look out in case one of his brothers comes near. one time, just as you started to cum, a couple fresh shiny’s got an entire eyeful of you arching and burying your nose into cody’s neck as he rolled his fingers over your clit. safe to say they were a bit spooked--but of course, cody thought it was the funniest thing and couldn't stop laughing even if you were close to tears with embarrassment. now....he doesn't invite anyone to watch, but he wouldn't say no to a few prying eyes          
wolffe: I feel like with wolffe, it’s gonna be right after a mission--one of you might've almost died or gotten real hurt so he’s not thinking about fucking you properly--he just want his mouth on yours, hands buried in your hair as he pins you against the wall. I dont think he initially meant for you to ride his thigh, but when he wedges it between your legs and you moan into his mouth the second he increases the pressure, he freezes. he’ll do it again and when it receives the same reaction from you he smirks and tugs on your hair and might say smthn like “you like that? if you wanted to ride my thigh you could've asked sooner”. he’s either focused on your face or on your pussy, just soaking up all your little reactions or twitches when you roll your cunt over the plastoid. he'll have both hands on your hips, helping you grin up on him, while you either cup his face or grip his arm. either way youre in for a wild fucking ride--wolffe tbh wants to see his armor dripping by the time he’s done with you. sO do nOT be surprised if he just, doesn't let you stop, pushes you to keep going until he’s satisfied. imo I think he’ll make you lick it up after, or just in general would really Like It if you run your tongue over any part of his armor. he likes to be Appreciated :)
wrecker (im sorry I just nEEDed to include him kejkejh): honestly since baby boy wrecker is uh, so big, thigh riding is some of the first things you try with him. you’ll both be butt ass naked bc it’s just easier to explore like this, and while wrecker is eager he knows he has to think about his strength in order not to overwhelm or hurt you unintentionally. he’s a bit of a goof ball so when you straddle his thigh and bring his thicC fingers to your cunt he’ll smile and say some shit like “wow, you’re wet” or like “is it always this wet/soft?” he doesn't mean for it to be teasing, it's more like he’s just stating a fact bc he’s curious about you. you just nod and say it’s all for you, baby/only for you. the second you put your cunt over his thigh he’ll curse and clamp his hands around your hips or ribcage, and just to make the experience all that better for him, you’ll jerk him off while you ride him. wrecker is very vocal/loud and so you’ll know exactly what you’re doing that he likes--he’ll probably tell you how pretty you look, or how good you smell etc., that bOY IS SO FULL OF LOVE and just wants to tell you! it doesn't take long for him to spill into your hand, he shakes and no doubt wakes up half the barrack/ship but who the fuck cares. you just smile and continue to ride his thigh, chasing your own thigh. once he recovers a bit, you can grab his fingers and show him how you like to be touched. he’s a surprisingly quick learner with this and so it doesn't take long for you to cum. afterwards he’ll run his fingers over his thigh, collect the mess you left and taste you and maybe say “you should ride my face. can we do that?”     
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goldrushzukka · 4 years
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yes yes I agree but consider
zuko abba stan
ok excellent ive been prompted i can talk about it now
aidays zuko is an old-school music gay. he listens to queen, wham, whitney, madonna, cher, and yes, abba. he makes azula watch mamma mia with him every year on his birthday. (she makes him watch here we go again on her birthday.)
you didn't really ask but im running w this now. here's how sokka affects zuko's favourite abba song:
pre-fic: dancing queen. a classic, reliable choice. a little predictable maybe, and he definitely gets eyerolls and fake-fan scoffs from people out of the loop, but it's a very important song for him. also, it's a banger. don't be a dick.
after meeting sokka, circa chapter 1: gimme gimme gimme (a man after midnight). i think this one is self explanatory. he wants a man. daylight optional.
getting to know sokka, vaguely around chapter 2: lay all your love on me. this one is also self-explanatory. "it was like shooting a sitting duck / a little small talk, a smile and baby i was stuck" speaks for itself.
falling fast and falling hard, circa weekend at momo's: take a chance on me. "if you change your mind / i'm the first in line", "when i dream i'm alone with you", "you want me to leave it there, afraid of a love affair / but i think you know / that i can't let go". yeah. you get it. you understand.
the "breakup", or how things stand right now going into chapter 7: knowing me, knowing you. azula buys noise cancelling headphones bc if she has to hear zuko (badly) sing NO MORE CAREFREE LAUGHTER SILENCE EVER AFTER WALKING THROUGH AN EMPTY HOUSE TEARS IN MY EYES HERE IS WHERE THE STORY ENDS THIS IS GOODBYE one more fucking time shes going to move in with iroh again
post-fic: honey, honey. hes HAPPY and IN LOVE and DIZZY and he wants the whole damn world to know about it. the way that you kiss good night, the way that you hold me tight. im gonna stick with you boy, you'll never get rid of me. yeah. exactly. so true abba. i think this is a very great aidays zukka song bc it's about love and overwhelming joy but also definitely about sex
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izzyliker · 4 years
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hey - this is one of the mods of the bi jon project. we don't actually dislike or disagree with pan jon at all, we just want to make a project focused on and celebrating bisexuality. our carrd is a bit rambling, but frankly we were trying our best/overcompensating to try and make sure people didn't misunderstand us and do - well, this. our intentions are good, and it's really kind of disenheartening to see all the hate we've gotten for what was meant to be a positive project. (1)
you're under no obligation to answer these, but i saw some of your posts in the tag and felt like reaching out because you did give us even the tiniest bit of slack in good faith. honestly, if you have any advice about what in our carrd is so overwhelmingly bad, we'd be happy to hear it. we've been trying to respond to the overwhelming amount of criticism we've got in a positive way, and take peoples' suggestions. (2)
as for why 'no anti-antis' was at the bottom of our rules list, it's legitimately bc we were trying so hard to be preventative about this negativity that we forgot to add it when we first posted the blog, and just remembered later. again, you're under no obligation to answer these, i just feel like no one's really actually letting us defend ourselves/are taking things in as bad faith a way as possible. (3)
im not exactly sure how the posts showed up in the tag bc ive been very purposefully not tagging them, also ive blocked all of you back (not sure why you blocked me if you actually want feedback, so it seems more like you just want free positive pr and not actual feedback) so its unlikely youll see whatever it is that i reply to this but whatever. 
the issues have all been repeatedly brought up to you so i dont really see how me repeating all of them once again could help. when i last looked at the cardd the things that stood out immediately included. 
pitting ace & bi identities and people against each other REPEATEDLY,  
starting off with a guilt trippy tone and maintaining it throughout (in my experience this is the #1 best way to receive backlash because people do not want to participate in events where you feel like youre being guilted into it, which going into scrutinizing detail over there not being enough content and passing judgement onto authors or artists over it is something that comes across as guilt trippy.),
repeatedly equating asexuality with sex repulsion (not to get into the misleading information about modteam aspec identity breakdowns, since you claimed that 3/4 of the team are aspec, which is technically correct, but what you didnt say was that only one is acespec. surely you know that [allosexual] aro and [alloromantic] ace are not interchangeable) and calling using biromantic over bisexual a “misunderstanding” of the identity as if how to define romantic vs sexual attraction (how to divide, if or if not to divide, use interchangeably different labels) isnt a deeply personal choice ace people who experience romantic attraction make, 
claiming that bisexual jon is canon (he isn’t. this is why people are suspicious of anti-other mspec identities sentiments. which theyre right, if youll be so kind as to stick around til the last paragraph) and repeatedly implying that the reason there isnt “enough” content centering bi jon because the aces are simply unable to not fixate on his asexuality (again, pitting identities against each other),
making the banned ship list way needlessly confusing and including ships that dont even include jon to it, which simply comes across as some kind of a list of bad ships, idk. a way to bypass this would simply be to say “we are looking for portrayals of healthy relationships!” and that couldve just been it. if you felt that that wouldnt exclude specific ships (eg. jondaisy that a lot of people write as a relationship between trauma survivors who have done very bad things trying to get better and learning to trust each other) it is possible to simply say “the modteam is squicked[/triggered] by ships with daisy/elias/peter and we’d like to read all of the works submitted so we’re asking not to receive submissions with those ships.” hating ships is literally completely normal but making rules hard to parse is going to attract questions, especially when the implication is that ships are excluded on the grounds of morality, and a blatant power difference ship (jonelias) is equated with jondaisy, which is from what ive seen almost exclusively shown to be a relationship between equals. that makes people EXTREMELY confused about where the line is. thats why youre getting so many questions about this.  
in general the carrd was spotty, guilt trippy, and needlessly moralizing where it definitely did not need to be. the key to getting people to engage without getting backlash is to make the event seem fun. when your carrd is filled with stuff about unrelated negative stuff people are not going to think it’s a fun event at all. 
and none of this even gets into the fact that at least one of the mods has a history of open hostility against pan people. i heard through the grapevine that he has since made a fauxpology about it, but frankly it already shone through in the language used in the event descriptions. its extremely hard to take any of this is good faith when it is easy to see that one of the organizers is quite fucking clear about thinking pansexuality is biphobic and the carrd is or at least used to be full of anti-pan (and other mspec identity) dogwhistles, and is notorious in some of the tma fic author circles for being extremely fucking nasty about trans men writing fic he doesn’t like to the point of pretending that we’re all cis people (in case youre not keeping track that is misgendering us by implication) because he doesn’t like it. i think some of you (or maybe all of you? idk) in general could stand to examine whether your engagements and participations in the fandom have been at all about having fun or adding positivity to anything, or simply making posts about what other people are doing wrong. it seems that every post i see from anyone in this group is guilt trippy and authoritative, and sadly this translated directly into the event. 
when youre, say, a trans man whose first touch to one of the mods was a post about how fic where trans men have piv sex with cis men is hurting him personally and making it a moral issue and not a matter of a simple preference to the point where he feels comfortable making claims about the trans men (and transmasc nonbinary people) writing fic about trans characters re: their gender or whether theyre fetishizing trans men, your willingness to engage in good faith with an event hosted by him that features numerous red flags is not going to be unconditional. 
im sorry to hear that it has been bad for your mental health, and idk whats fucking going on with this event anymore, but my good faith interpretations have diminished significantly since i saw the shit tmc specifically has been saying about pansexual people and pansexuality as an identity label. i have no clue where the rest of you stand but tmc has repeatedly, consistently shown himself to be unable to act in good faith towards anyone other than people who agree with him.  
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goatlingsvent · 2 years
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also in case yall really need to know i have a lot of really stressful personal shit going on in my life rn- the sudden flood of messages about the name cannababy and me knowing that mice has been harrassing people for a long time now got me very overwhelmed and anxious because i knew that mice's messages werent in good spirit given their track record of harrassing people on twitter, and also anxious that the name cannababy *wasnt* allowed and id get in trouble for it. also my ask where i said lets celebrate mice's ban was half sarcastic and a joke. though i am truly glad they cant start shit with ppl on goatlings anymore bc they have been doing things like this for a long time. im not "acting hard" here, im not "hard" at all, i truly am a very sensitive person due to mental illness, im just not afraid of confrontation when it comes to people talking shit and starting drama abt my own friends. as far as i remember thats the only shit ive been pressed about on this blog other than yall being weird and obsessed with drama. leave me alone mice was a dick to me (and many others) and even the mods and site staff agreed so drop it
🐉
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coureirsix · 3 years
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ty for everything youve discussed tonight and the sheer amount of support u give for poc i cant even begin to know how insane it must be to have been literally in contact with the person who perpetrated everything and have your advice and WORDS just taken out of context and ignored. this whole thing reminded me how isolated i used to feel long ago when i actually used to attend spn cons as like a baby in middle/high school and was just surrounded by a largely white crowd. im egyptian and from toronto and it's super diverse here in reality, but when i would attend the cons id feel so insanely alone every time (id go alone, my friends arent spn fans LMAO). i would watch SO MANY girls make brand new friends within the weekend and i could count on one hand the amount of woc id actually pick out in the crowd and i always noticed how ALONE we were. it's very hard to put into words, like the cons were fun during events but the whole exp really put into perspective how much it fucking sucks when ur surrounded by people that cant rly help but look down on u ?? like there was this feeling otherness i always felt being there despite how dorky the whole event actually is and how much of a loser we all were lol. i hadnt attended in years at this point and i actually ended up being part of the crowd that stopped watching circa 2017/2018 bc the queer-baiting and mistreatment of poc was just overwhelming to me within canon and came back for nov 5 🤡. anyway im RAMBLING but i just wanted to say since coming back ive found so many amazing poc creators and hilarious, smart people i can actually relate to and have had similar experiences and backgrounds as me. i never used to see people discussing the insane amount of racism+transphobia within the fanbase when i was in high school and it sucks (and is exhausting) that it's the people affected by it that actually engage in the discourse repeatedly but it's still a comfort to see people care similarly about the same things as i do. so ty for that<3 i'm finally having the fan community experience i wish i had back then.
listen i get that, too!! i have never been to an spn con but im a big fan of like, big bands with a huge white following so showing up to a place FILLED with hundreds if white faces absolutely makes you feel small. i have been there, friend. i understand.
and i agree! thankfully people are like, actually more willing to talk about this because ive BEEN there where you even begin to talk about racism and white people IMMEDIATELY get uncomfortable and now you’re the bad guy for even bringing the subject up. especially in fandom spaces where you couldn’t say anything or else you’d get bombarded with white “fandom is a place to have fun!!” and “ugh im in fandom to get AWAY with real life politics!!” like ok, Ashleighayy-Muhriey let me just take off my brown skin and features then. 
and im GLAD... im SO glad you’re having a good time this second time around. it is what you deserve! (we are all clowns that came back after nov 5  🤡) 
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imagineurfavs · 4 years
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Pentagon Kino - Birth Chart Analysis
“Hi! love ur writing huhu do you think u could do a birth chart analysis thingy on kino from ptg??? ik hes an aquarius but he doesnt really seem like one??? sdfd thank u :)”
aaaaaah thank you so much for requesting this, ive been aching to write sth like this for ages lmao. i didnt know from which angle you wanted it, like relationships, sex or whatever so ima just do an overall kinda one. lmk if you want something more focused aha Also i agree lol, hyunggu doesn’t really seem like a straight up aquarius, i wish i knew what time he was born i could see his ascendant lmao ALSO. I’ve just done the first 6 placements as they seem to be the ones most people care about lmao, lmk if you want me to do the remaining ones
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Sun (our true self, the soul) - Aquarius (1st Decan): This is what makes Hyunggu the social butterfly he is lol, what’s probably responsible for him being in so many different social circles. Aquarians have many many varied fields of interest, which usually end up being quite niche or “out there” lol, just like how Hyunggu, the 22 year old man in 2020, LOVES old school jazz music and classic movies. 1st decan Aquarians are (mostly) open books who really do shine more when they have an audience, or at least with a lot of people surrounding them. But with that being said, they're also totally happy to be in their own company bc they know themselves so well, they’re comfortable with themselves. They also have persistence like no other lol; when they set their mind to something, there’s no lengths they wont go to to achieve it. AKA Kino the workaholic who spends his life in the studio lol
Moon (emotions, instincts, our vulnerable side) - Capricorn: Much more emotional than people think, but he prefers to keep it private. He’ll only let his emotions out fully if he totally trusts the people he’s with. (the fact that unis have seen him cry numerous times is a testament to how much he trusts us ig sdgjsg so sweet) He loves taking care of people; he likes to feel needed. With that in mind though he can be a bit of a “fixer” lol which might not always be a good thing, he’s attracted to people who look like they need some help. One of the most devoted placements in terms of relationships, they aren’t ones that really go for one night stands or short fling type relationships. This placement makes him surprisingly traditional in relationships lol, like he loves homely warm kinda vibes in that sense. Likes to show off any relationship he does have though lol, like he wont air out any private details, but he does want the world to see how well yall are doing lol.
Mercury (How we communicate & express ourselves, intellect) - Capricorn: DONT EVER BREAK A PROMISE WITH HYUNGGU OMG. He’ll never forgive you. This boy takes promises so seriously, and takes any secrets with him to his grave. If he ever gives you his word on anything, you best believe he means it with every fibre of his being. Kino isn’t someone to mince his words, he always means what he says. He’ll still try his best to not hurt any feelings, but he won’t lie. This is what helps him follow through with all the ideas that he gets, he’s great at planning and knowing what’s worth seeing through to the end and what just wont work. Which is probably why everything he’s ever put out to the public is god tier shit lol, he wont spend time on anything less than perfection. Another placement that favours tradition, you wont ever catch him slipping up on any honorifics or social formalities lmao.
Venus (how we are in love & romance, creativity, what brings us joy)  - Capricorn: Kang Hyunggu perfect husband material confirmed. Capricorn is the sign that cares most about traditions and stuff in relationships. Not always like old school kinda traditions, but he cares greatly about anniversaries and stuff lol. Very cautious in love, he wont open up or admit his feelings easily and he wont even bother pursuing someone he doesn’t see at least somewhat of a future with. Insanely loyal and steadfast in love. He’s someone you can always count on no matter the time or place, and he wants someone who’ll do the same for him. He wants a fairy tale romance lol. He wants to be remembered for what he does, to leave a legacy that lasts forever. Big on validation, he loves to be complemented and revered; then he’ll feel like all the hours of work and effort he’s put in actually meant something lmao. 
Mars (sex, passion, anger, what drives us) - Pisces I feel like this placement is the reason why Hyunggu can get so mushy and emotional. Pisceans are totally driven by their emotions, sometimes to a fault. So when it comes to something that he’s so so passionate about: ie. Pentagon, his emotions can just totally overwhelm him and before we know it hes sobbing on national TV (im looking at u rtk...). Sex isn't something he takes lightly at all, if there’s no emotion or love involved, it just doesn’t feel right to him. He views sex as something that’s good for the soul lol, its very much an emotional thing for him, as opposed to just a physical need. Very much a hopeless romantic; the type to write poetry for their significant other and cry whilst they read it to you lmao. He’d really give his all to someone he loves, to him self sacrifice is the grandest gesture of love lol. Just remember that it was him who wrote Die For U...yeah...he’s very that. It’s all or nothing with Hyunggu lol, if he chooses to give you his heart, you’ll get his soul too. (Side note this might also be what makes him sensitive and sulky lol)
Jupiter (optimism, luck, philosophy & just good vibes lol) - Aquarius To me, this placement is what makes him so agreeable like, he accepts everyone no matter what. He doesn’t care about gender, race, orientation, religion, anything like that. If someone piques his interest, nothing else matters to him other than getting to know them. He’s always ready to question authority, to break away from the norm and try new things. If he wants to do something, he’s gonna do it the way he wants to, not necessarily the way he’s been told to do it. He’s not afraid to be different, he likes to be a bit of a pioneer lmao. Mostly enjoys being with a lot of people, he loves having many different personalities to bounce off of, ig he got lucky being put in such a large group lol. But he still likes to have his freedom; or more so he wants everyone to have their freedom, so he can for sure be a bit of a philanthropist. Lowkey wants to change the world for the better lmao
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abiik · 4 years
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hey h *keeses u* ilu and hope u r doing well today, also 👉👈 i was wondering if u could tell me abt zhi yin? im not sure if ive properly asked about her in the past (and if i did and dont remember oops) jfkfjdkf
hiii jo ! ily too & i hope u r able to get some rest today *keeses u* mwah <3
i absolutely Can tell u about zhi yin! u have not properly asked about her (besides the second part of this ask) & other than sporadic posting about her, i dont think ive really made anything properly talking about her. SO HERE WE GO!
zhi yin is the heir to the northernmost cardinal clan on youxiong, the zhi clan. she's the older sister to zhi cheng & the niece to general zhi fahai. yin was vital in cheng's parenting, acting as a third, and practically, the primary parent for most of his life. in a way, despite both of their parents being pretty involved in their lives, the two ended up relying on each other most of the time.
before yin's incident, she was able to shift just like anyone else on youxiong & she had a very strong core that enabled how skilled she was w cultivation, even as a child. but after her incident, her cultivation is very weak and shifting is something she is no longer able to do, & this weighs on her duty to her family, especially as the family heir. this doesnt stop yin though; she’s always been skilled in archery, diplomacy, the liberal arts, & medicine. she's also an avid reader, and finds hope for her situation in her clan's philosophy: one should achieve the impossible.
the 'incident' was an event that occurred when yin was young. i have yet to discern how old she actually was when she experienced it but i know she was young enough to have made somewhat of a prodigy out of herself amongst the zhi clan's junior members. im still working out the kinks of how the event unfolds but i Do know yin saves cheng from a soul-snatching spirit by, essentially, taking his place & getting her soul snatched to an egregious amount before she's saved & yanked away from the spirit by cheng. this means she still partially retains her soul but it's a tiny sliver of what she had before.
yin is seen as 'ill' after her incident - cheng is always looking out for her, partially bc he feels responsible & bc he could Never repay his sister for what she did for him & so allow him to do this one thing for her; her father is cautious around her, his high standards have lowered only slightly bc he understands of course, such a horrible accident, one can only be understanding of his daughters ailments, but she will push thru, he knows it! if you dont want to be heir any longer yin-yin, i understand -; her mother is a little harsher, infinitely more cautious, and very scared of the outcome of what happened to yin. lady zhi worries about demonic cultivation more than anything & when yin DOES go into bouts of dissociation so bad where it seems as if yin as been possessed by something, lady zhi can't help but want to both be very far away from her daughter & to help her.
after yin's accident, her body was sort of left open. previously, she was already very sensitive to spiritual energies and such, and she remains so, but without her own filling her body, when she goes to areas with high spiritual concentrations, yin can have a chance of being overwhelmed with it. yin, as a person, ALSO has the tendency to set her negative emotions aside in order to compromise - her family, & by extension, her clan, is known for being honest & unrestrained, so arguments & clashes are common when people don't agree, but when this borders on feud or fight territory, they need somebody to talk them down, and that somebody has ALWAYS been yin. she's exceptionally talented at navigating tense situations, even when it doesnt come to her own family, but a lot of times it can come at the expense of her own feelings. & THIS wells up in a dark place as resentful energy inside of her, helping fuel demonic cultivation, which makes her both much stronger, physically, and easier to control.
yin does not go under often - she has to go to a place with a high spiritual concentration, either a benevolent spiritual concentration, or a resentful spritual concentration OR someone can set her off by puppeteering the energy she has stored within her own emotions. when she Does go under, she is not usually in control of her body, and she does not usually remembers what happens, only in flashes or vague images.
when zoe meets yin, general zhi has been grooming her in the ways of demonic cultivation in order to use her as his own puppet, in order to control her as he sees fit whenever he needs to, but in a way that would ensure that he would not have to be close by to trigger her into going under so that the crimes he has her commit would never be tied to him.
hmm speaking of zoe: yin is the first person zoe CONSCIOUSLY meets on youxiong, and is also punched by zoe immediately upon zoe waking up, and STILL serves her soup. jekxjdkc.
despite her core being very weak & practically being literally the weakest person on youxiong, if yin were to come to earth, she would still be exceptionally skilled by human standards.
yin is more of an archer than a swordsman, and close-range combat is remedied by knives or by simply using poisons, of which she is Also well-versed in :)
she is well-read & loves to experiment with new things. any sort of thing. >:)
yin will always be seen in varying degree of purples & blacks to represent her clan.
if yin could do it over again, she would save cheng again in a heartbeat. she would do it again in every lifetime, even if it meant being the weakest, even if it meant having to work the hardest she can to be regarded as a proper heir to her clan, even if it meant having a mother who was afraid of her, she would do it all again so that he would be safe.
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heh.. got a... memory! quite recent (two weeks ago max tbh time is fake) anyways i was in vc with my homies from japan (three chilean including myself and 1 argentinian who lives in jpn) anyways we hadnt rly vc in a loong time, chi1 and arg always play w me bc they've been on the server for a while and we also send memes a lot, but chi2 wasnt in the server until recently. (idk why, but chi1 and chi2 are childhood friends and tbh we all thought that if chi1 didnt wanna includ him it was bc of smth so we didnt ask lmao) well anyways he got added now bc we all wanted to play genshin together (actually ch1 doesnt rly like genshin but he played bc he likes playing w us), it was fun lmao and i could go off on many tangents but this time's core memory is: i obviously had the voice changer on bc even though all of them know me irl and know my real voice ( *puke emoji* ) i feel super insecure without it now when im online lmao, and ch2 who i hadn't talked to in vc quite a while (and had never heard my fake voice) said like oooh dude ur voice 👀 and well even tho we dont interact much he's my friend so i told him ooo lmao its fake its a voice changer program glad its workin thooo and he was like ooo nice it sounds rly cool and honestly it felt great even though its my fake voice. it was the reverse experience of 2020 halloween lmaoo it was great :-) well then also he said that it isnt truly fake bc its still my voice and asked if id like to be on t someday and my voice would probably get deeper and i obv do lmao so i said yes and tbh ive lost all hope (due to current circumstances and not seeing an end to them) but he said like rly hopeful shit and tbh even though i cant truly agree or believe things will get better it felt good to have someone else believe in me. also that reminded me of how i told my other friend that even if i was allowed to go out again idk if i would bc i am probably extremely socially awkward now (even more lmao) and that i would probably feel very overwhelmed by the outside world and he was super supportive and he said like even if we went out he would even order nuggets for me bc he didnt want me to feel bad and wanted to be a source of support and tbh i nearly cried lmao i wouldve cried but i was in vc thats all that stopped me
anyways yeah i dont think we'll even get that chance but im thankful either way. in this case it rly is the thought that counts huh
honestly some months ago i just wanted this all to be over but now.... i dont know. i dont know if i can lead a normal life again. i hate myself and ive lost all hope of being able to change the things i hate. ive become even more shy and scared. if it truly ends, idk if ill make it. my social relationships already are strained. even if i went back, i think im going to be an stranger in a group of people who know each other well. i guess ill cherish my memories from 2017 and 2019 and tbh its fine. i already had a breakdown over this some months ago lol i think im fine now. ive had time to accept it and prepare for my inminent loneliness. even if i had the chance to go back to normal, i think its already too late for me.
unravel has always been one of my top songs and ive always related to it to some degree but as time passes i feel like i understand it more and more. tk really is good at trasmitting the feeling of the song but tbh now the lyrics hit fr, hits different oof
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